#but i hope ill get to see it in its future stages!!

[soupdreamer]

art gatsby closes today 😿

[kruegerspillow]

the look of love ; jayce talis

creators note: never really wrote for arcane so for my first time i gave my best shot! this'll be a series and ill try my best to write jayce :) bear with me guys

word count: 1.5k

warnings: none, though the reader is said to have brown hair & glasses, eventual smut, not proofread.

part one — part two — part three

Years of study, years of forcing your brain to absorb all the knowledge that had been spreaded out on the table in front of you.

That's what it takes for you to enter Piltover Academy. Complete agony and exhaustion behind that smile of yours. Though, it's worth it, right? Being accepted into the university you've longed for in the past years, hell, maybe even decades.

Hundreds of pearly whites were shown to you as you entered the building, the smell of different kinds of... rich fragrance hitting your nostrils. You held back every muscle in your face to not scrunch up in disgust. Your gaze shifted away from the people and onto the edifice. The building itself had greatly structured walls and ceilings. That's one thing to admire, at least. Statues were placed here and there, being the center of attention in the crowd forming around you, but that's not enough to shake off the annoyance building up on your shoulders.

A familiar, grand voice spoke up as the whole building abruptly went quiet. Your movements halted, taken aback by the sudden loss of commotion. More and more people gathered around the center of the room and, out of fear of missing out, you squeezed into the suffocating crowd. There stood the golden boy of Piltover on the stage.

“Good evening people of the future,” Jayce greeted, voice filled with warmth and determination. “Hope everyone's doin' alright.”

He cleared his throat, placing the papers on the podium as the crowd cheered loudly. You, too, clapped for him.

“Right,” he paused for a moment as the crowd's cheers died down. “It's been... a while, ever since the invention of Hextech. Since then, the glorious city of Piltover has been working its way to a brighter, easier future.”

A small bead of sweat slid down his forehead, “I was a nobody— my family used to create hammers that are probably used to make the stage I'm on. You see that?”

He pointed to the Hextech building that could be seen through the skylight of the University. The audience paused, taking their time as they listened to his speech. Your gaze shifted from him to the building, your heart thumping against your chest— for what? You don't know exactly.

“Hextech couldn't have done it without you all,” Jayce spoke. “And, I, as the Hextech inventor, will keep fighting for a brighter future. For our brighter future!”

And the crowd roared as he spoke his finishing line, a cheeky smile tugging onto the corner of his lips as he stepped down from the stage. People gathered around him, asking him all sorts of questions and begging him for his signature or a handshake. You, though, didn't move a single inch from your previous position; having just arrived into the university.

Jayce accepted the attention the crowd was giving him, answering the questions with ease, shaking their hands and writing down his signature on a piece of paper. Your brain seemed to stop working before you snapped out of your trance. You didn't have the desire to talk to him (yes, you do.) After all, he's a busy man with a busy career, what's he got for someone like you? You're fresh out of the oven, still clueless and would ramble away about some kind of nonsense that he wouldn't be interested in. So, you decided to play it safe and made your way through the horde to get to your room.

Jayce smiled awkwardly as more and more people began appearing, causing him to pause or trip over his own words; but he's good. He's good at hiding it all behind his facade. His gaze shifted before abruptly meeting your eyes, noticing the conflict in them. He'd never seen anyone so... ahem, unbothered. Your chocolate-colored eyes, gazing into nothingness while people surrounded him, crushing him with questions and pleas. The whole world seemed to stop spinning as he paused for a moment, taking his time to gaze over you before he was interrupted with another request.

What? Were you not interested in him? Was his speech too straightforward? Or was it too bland?

His thoughts scattered over one another as the amount of people began to gradually decrease, having their feeling of satisfaction after he'd answered every single one of their questions. Eventually, all the chattering from the people died down; and, soon, they're all dismissed.

But it was too late.

You were no longer in his sight and he was left with his own thoughts. Jayce was never good at pushing these doubts away. Making everyone pleased with even the slightest scent of his cologne was his goal, yet, your absence left him with a heavy heart. Fuck, he doesn't even know you... yet.

His eyes were glued onto the spot where you'd stood in the middle of the crowd, his gaze hazy and mind full of thoughts— but he knows better than to cry over spilled milk. He turned on his heels, adjusting his suit before hastily making his way back to the Hextech lab. His hands clenched into fists as he planned his next speech, wishing that you'd be at least slightly impressed by him. Getting to know you was his next step to getting rid of his little-to-no information about you. And, maybe, he'd ask Viktor... if he's even aware of the new visitor in the Piltover Academy.

“Viktor,” Jayce called out to his partner, his voice nearly echoing through the Hextech lab.

Viktor, who took his time turning around, glanced at him over his shoulder before shooting him a look of curiosity. Jayce seemed… conflicted. That made Viktor’s curiosity ignite. One of his eyebrows curled up, waiting for Jayce to continue his sentence. Jayce shut the door behind him, a look of uncertainty washing over his expressions.

“Jayce.” Viktor quipped, his voice low and steady.

Jayce cleared his throat, taking a seat on one of the chairs as he placed his leg over the table. He tried to look casual, he really did, though Viktor was observant enough to notice the beads of sweat sliding down his temple. The silence took over the conversation, creating this unbearable silence before Jayce eventually broke it.

“Quick question, ahem, my partner.” Jayce paused, “did you notice any new… visitors around the University of Piltover? Or, perhaps, around the Hextech building?”

Viktor gave him a look of indifference, clearly taken aback by the sudden question. Though, his gaze eventually fell onto the floor as he pondered the new faces he’d seen today. Quite a lot, Viktor thought to himself. Jayce had his fingers crossed, hoping for any information regarding you, peculiarly.

“New visitors…” Viktor repeated. “There were a lot of new visitors today. But if you have someone in mind— specifying them would help.”

Jayce cleared his throat, murmuring incoherent words as he leaned back against the chair. His brows furrowed, the memories of you seemingly disappearing one by one as soon as someone asks about them.

“Uh, no, well— well yes, actually.” Jayce stumbled over his words, his mind clouded by thoughts.

Viktor tilted his head to the side, finding Jayce's reply amusing to him. Curiosity piqued, and Jayce finally gathered himself.

“They wore glasses, uh… They have brown hair, not too long but not too short, y'know? And..." Jayce trailed off, trying to squeeze the memories out. "Yeah, that's all I remember.”

“Hm…”

“You've got any idea?”

“... No.”

Viktors reply caused Jayce's shoulders to sag. Jayce slumped back against his chair, his gaze falling onto the floor beneath him. Viktor furrowed his brows, taking a few steps closer to him.

“Why?” Viktor asked, curiosity evident in his voice. “Are you interested?”

“What? Pfft, no, nonsense.” Jayce replied, getting his leg off of the desk. “It's just… I don't know, they seemed so uninterested in my speech earlier.”

“Bruised your ego?”

“Hah! You wish,” Jayce retorted, his voice shifting to his usual playful one.

Viktor scoffed softly before turning his back towards Jayce, walking back to his original position as he glanced around the blueprints distributed onto the table. That caught Jayce's attention. He stood up from his chair, making his way to Viktor.

“Still looking at the blueprints?” Jayce murmured, “shouldn't you be sleeping, partner?”

The silence lingered for a moment, Jayce's question falling on deaf ears. Jayce furrowed his brows, his hand reaching up to touch Viktor's shoulder, though, instead, it hovered over him.

“Hey.” Jayce called out once more, causing Viktor to snap himself out of his thoughts.

Jayce's hand soon found Viktor's shoulder, giving him a light squeeze before taking a step front to stand right beside him. Jayce's brows furrowed, eyes filled with concern and care while Viktor stood there silently. Viktor's hand grabbed on the edge of the table, leaning forward onto the table. Soon enough, Viktor turned on his heels once more before walking towards the door.

“I should be sleeping.” Viktor spoke, his voice unfaltering.

Jayce watched silently, brows furrowed and his expression nearly pleading. Viktor took his cane and silently walked out the door.

“Goodbye.” He greeted Jayce as he left the room.

The door closed with a small click, and Jayce was left alone, once again. A small frown tugged into the corner of his lips, causing him to nearly pout. One of his hands made their way to his forehead, rubbing against his temple as he leaned back on the table. He had no reason to be so… worked up today. Did he?

kruegerspillow © 2024 ➵ do not feed my work into ai, repost or translate my work to post it around. Reblogs are much appreciated ୨ৎ

[crescenthistory]

c5 with paul atreides please 🫶🫶

ah, paul atreides, my favourite childhood best friends to lovers man. hope this is what you were imagining, love<3

Prompt: C.5 "There will not be a day where I am not there for you"

Words: 3.5k

Warnings: canon typical political unrest and tension, paul and reader have a lot on their shoulders, reader gets sick, implied chronic illness/flare-up/autoimmune reader but can be read as a normal fever (i'm indulging myself okay), hiding/avoidance, confrontation if you squint, hurt/comfort, they are in the unspoken stage between best friends and lovers, confessions of love, crying session, cuddles and kisses

The days on Caladan felt numbered.

Everywhere you looked, the subtle reminders of impending change crept in like shadows. The halls of Castle Caladan, once warm and full of life, felt quieter now, more solemn. The sea beyond the window still whispered its familiar lullaby, but even that seemed muted, like it was holding its breath, waiting.

Thus, you waited too, feeling the weight of the future settle over the estate like a shroud. Arrakis loomed on the horizon, distant but unavoidable. You could see it in every furrow of Duke Leto’s brow, in the way Lady Jessica moved with a deliberate grace that betrayed her own hidden tension.

Most of all, you saw it in Paul.

Your closest friend, your confidant since childhood. He carried the weight of all that was to come more heavily than anyone. It showed in the slight weariness under his eyes, the way his normally steady hands trembled when he thought no one was looking. He hadn’t spoken of it directly to you, not yet, but you knew him too well to be fooled.

The Paul of your memories – the boy who would laugh with you in secret corners of the castle, who would pull you into the sea on a whim, clothes and all – was slipping away, bit by bit. In his place stood a man, shoulders squared with responsibility, eyes far too wise for someone so young. It was a transformation that frightened you, not just because it meant losing the boy you once knew, but because you weren’t sure whether anyone could truly withstand all that waited him. Whether anyone would even notice how much it was wearing him down. Anyone but you.

It was why you were careful, watching him as you always did, trying to gauge when the weight would become too much. You had become a fixture in his life over the years, someone he could rely on when the pressures of being Duke Leto’s heir seemed too heavy to bear. A constant.

The days leading up to the move to Arrakis felt heavier, their passage marked by subtle shifts in the air. Paul was being pulled in so many directions – meetings, preparations, plans – and you saw him less and less. Worry grew in your stomach, but, as always, the two of you cut out time for each other, even if only a quiet hug for a few minutes in a corner somewhere.

Which is why, when you first felt the dizziness creeping in, the strange bouts of fatigue that left you breathless and weak, you kept it to yourself.

At first, it didn’t seem like much. Just a few moments of light-headedness, easily dismissed. You brushed off the way the room swayed, grounded yourself by gripping the edges of tables or leaning discreetly against the walls. When Paul looked at you, concern flickering in his eyes, you waved it away with a smile, pretending it was nothing. He had enough to worry about – you refused to add to it. Not when he was already carrying so much.

As the days passed, though, it became harder to hide. Your body betrayed you in small ways – your steps slower, your hands unsteady when you reached for things. The ever-present ache in your bones was becoming harder to ignore. You found yourself avoiding the castle’s common spaces, spending more time in your room, curled up in bed, trying to will away the growing sickness that had taken hold of you.

Even the servants noticed, their eyes lingering on you with concern as they brought trays of food you barely touched. It was not uncommon for you to grow sick occasionally, there was a running joke around the castle about your weak immune system, and usually the servants would let Paul know if you stayed in your room. This time, though, you gave them strict instructions not to speak of it to anyone, especially not Paul. He didn’t need to know. He didn’t need this on top of everything else.

You could handle it. You always handled it.

Yes, you kept it to yourself. Unfortunately, to achieve that, you also kept to yourself.

***

The evening sun was beginning to set, casting long shadows across the walls of your bedroom. You had not left the room in two days. The curtains were drawn tight, blocking out the golden light that you usually loved. Today, the brightness hurt your eyes, each beam of sunlight sharp as it hit your feverish skin.

You had barely eaten, your appetite vanishing as the sickness rooted itself deeper. It was more than just the fatigue now – your stomach churned, and your head pounded with every small movement. Beams of pain adorned your lower forehead, temples and eyesockets, and no amount of massaging seemed to help.

You told yourself the words Paul had always whispered to you on days like this; it will be fine, it is temporary, you are safe. You just need some rest.

It didn't have the same effect.

As you shifted under the blankets, trying to find a more comfortable position, you heard a quiet knock on the door. You froze. The knock was too familiar – soft, hesitant, but with a certainty that told you exactly who it was. Your tried to bite down a groan all the while your heart squeezed.

It was Paul.

This was the longest period of time you had gone without seeing each other in ages, and not from a lack of trying on his part. You knew his schedule by heart and had purposefully lived around it for the past week before you finally caved and retreated to your bed to get over this bout of sickness. Even there, you had the servants tell him you were elsewhere, should he ever ask them.

It was not that you did not miss him terribly nor a disdain for him seeing you sick – you had worked together to get over equating sickness with weakness in your head. However, a part of you clearly still saw it as a burden, because your heart ached at the thought of worrying him with this.

You could not hide forever, though, and now here he was. You felt oddly unprepared to face him as you scurried up, fixing your hair and trying to put on a more assured smile.

When you didn't respond to the knock, the door creaked open slightly, and Paul slipped inside. His eyes found you immediately, and you could see the worry in them as he took in your pale face and the heap of blankets surrounding you that seemed to scream I am hiding from the world.

"Hi, my love," he whispered, and you responded with a greeting yourself, sounding weaker than you had hoped.

He closed the door quietly behind him, his movements deliberate and calm, but you could sense the tension beneath his composed exterior.

“You’ve been avoiding me." His voice was low, soft but with a quiet accusation woven through it.

You swallowed, trying to summon the energy to continue to smile, to pretend like everything was fine. “No, no, I haven’t been avoiding you,” you lied. “I’ve just been… resting.”

Paul’s brow furrowed slightly, and he crossed the room with slow, careful steps until he stood at the edge of your bed. He looked down at you, his gaze searching, as if he could see through the weak façade you were putting up. He sat down beside you on the bed, body angled towards you, and reached for your hand.

His touch was gentle, cool against your feverish skin. “Resting...” he echoed, his thumb brushing across the back of your hand. “Because you're sick. Why didn’t you tell me?”

You flinched inwardly. Of course, he knew. He always knew. Paul was nothing if not observant, especially when it came to you. You had been foolish to think you could hide this from him for long.

“I didn’t want to worry you,” you admitted, voice barely a whisper. “You have so much going on right now. With Arrakis, with your father… I just didn’t want to add to your burdens.”

Paul’s expression softened, though the worry in his eyes remained. He shook his head slightly, as if unable to comprehend what you were saying. “You think you can ever be a burden to me?”

You didn’t respond immediately, because a part of you did feel like a burden, no matter how irrational it may be. Paul had so much on his plate already – how could you possibly ask him to worry about you on top of everything else?

Paul’s hand tightened around yours at your prolonged silence, attempting to ground you, pull you out of your spiraling thoughts. He sighed, a soft, weary sound, and then he spoke, his voice tinged with a quiet desperation you hadn’t expected.

“You are not a burden, my love. There will not be a day where I am not there for you – you just have to let me.”

The words hit you like a wave, gentle but powerful, their weight sinking deep into your chest. Paul’s gaze never left you even when yours flickered from nerves. In that moment, you saw the truth in his eyes. He wasn’t just saying it to comfort you, he meant it with every part of him. There was a fierce honesty in his voice, a promise.

"I'm sorry, Paul," you began, unsure of how to phrase yourself. "I just really did not want to worry you more than you already are."

“I was more worried when I didn’t see you,” he continued softly. “When I didn’t know what was wrong. To not know how you are or what is going on hurts more than anything else.”

Your breath caught in your throat, guilt and relief swirling together in a confusing mixture. You hadn’t realized how much your absence could affect him. Paul always seemed so steady, so unshakable, but now, as he sat beside you, his hand still holding yours with that familiar tenderness, you could see the vulnerability in his eyes. There was a fear there that you wanted to smooth away, the fear of losing you, of not being able to help.

“I’m sorry,” you repeated, dragging your intertwined hands closer to your body. "I didn’t mean to make things harder for you. Quite the opposite, actually.”

Paul sighed again, this time softer, and he shifted closer, so his side was flush against yours. You moved some of the blankets around so there would be no barricade for him, your breathing somehow already easier at his presence. His hand left yours only for a moment, but you immediately missed the warmth of his touch. He reached up to cup your cheek, tilting your face so you were forced to meet his gaze again.

“You could never make things harder for me. You are what make things easier” he murmured, his thumb brushing gently over your skin. “You are my anchor. Without you…”

He trailed off, but the weight of what he didn’t say hung in the air between you. Without you, he’d be lost. Without you, the pressures of his future, of the impending move to Arrakis, might consume him entirely.

Tears prickled at the corners of your eyes, and you blinked them away, not wanting to cry in front of him. Paul saw the flicker of emotion and leaned in closer, his forehead resting gently against yours. His breath was warm against your skin, his closeness comforting in a way that words could never be.

"How are you feeling?" His voice was a whisper, eyes searching yours. "Be honest."

You let out an almost teary-laugh, overwhelmed by emotion. "Terrible, quite frankly. My body is aching and I feel like I'm on a boat."

Paul hummed, thumb still brushing your cheek. "Would it help to lay further down?" He always knew.

You tried to nod, but frowned when the movement caused you more pain. Paul immediatley leaned forward to kiss away the furrow of your brows, knowing the tension usually worsens your headache, and then went to help you lay down in a better position. With your heads laid on the same pillow, Paul held your waist with one hand and your face with another, trying to massage out any tension.

“You don’t have to protect me,” he whispered, voice low and steady, wrapping around you as much as his comforting embrace. “Not from this. Not from you. Even now, with everything – especially now actually – you are the one thing I need.”

His words settled over you, soothing the ache in your chest, yet stirring something deeper, something raw that you had tried so hard to suppress. The weight of everything – the move, the sickness, your unwavering care for him – all of it was bearing down on you, but hearing Paul speak with such sincerity, seeing the tenderness in his eyes, it made something inside you break. The kind of break you could only do around him, because you knew in your heart you were safe to do so.

You exhaled shakily, feeling the tears that had been threatening to spill finally break free. A small sob escaped your throat before you could stop it, and suddenly, it was as if the floodgates had opened. The tears came in earnest now, unbidden and unstoppable, all the emotions you had kept hidden pouring out.

Paul didn’t flinch, he didn’t pull away. Instinctively he pulled you closer to him, gathering you gently into his chest, his movements slow and careful, so as to not hurt or startle you. He held you close, head against his chest, his warmth enveloping you, his heart beating steadily beneath your ear. He moved to cradle the back of your head, fingers tangling in your hair as he whispered soft, soothing words you couldn’t quite make out over the sound of your own quiet sobs.

You had not realised just how much you had been holding in until this moment, how badly you had needed him. The world outside felt too heavy, too uncertain, but here, in his arms, you felt safe. The weight you had been carrying melted away, leaving only the quiet rhythm of his heartbeat and the steady rise and fall of his chest beneath your cheek.

“I’m here,” Paul murmured softly, his voice soothing, as if the words themselves could hold you together. “I’m right here. I'm not going anywhere, I'm with you.”

You closed your eyes, breathing him in, letting the sound of his voice calm the storm of emotions inside you. The soft, rhythmic strokes of his fingers in your hair, the way his hand pressed gently into the small of your back, holding you against him. Everything about his presence was grounding, reminding you that you are not alone. You never had been.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered after a long moment, your voice thick with emotion, though the tears had finally begun to slow. “I didn’t mean to–”

“Shh,” he interrupted gently, his lips brushing the top of your head in the softest of gestures. “You don’t need to apologise.”

You pulled back just enough to look up at him, your eyes still glassy from the tears. His face was close, his expression softer than you had ever seen it. His usually composed features, now filled with a tenderness that made your heart ache. His thumb brushed a stray tear from your cheek, and he offered you a small, reassuring smile.

“I was just trying to give you space,” you said quietly, your voice hoarse from crying. “You’ve been dealing with so much, and I didn’t want to add to it.”

Paul’s brow furrowed slightly, as though he fundamentally could not understand how you could view yourself or your relationship that way. His hand still rested on your cheek, his touch light but steady.

“I know what’s happening around us is overwhelming,” he admitted, careful, like he didn’t want the weight of the words to fall too heavily between you. “But I’m not leaving Caladan behind to face Arrakis alone. I need you with me. In spirit as much as in person.”

“Oh, Paul,” you breathed, his name slipping from your lips like a quiet confession. You searched his eyes, unsure of what to say, unsure if you could even find the words for everything you were feeling. You moved one of your hands that was clutching his shirt up to trace his face.

You could see in his eyes that he knew everything you wanted to say. He had always known.

“I’ve always needed you, my love,” he whispered, his gaze unwavering, the intensity of his words cutting through the quiet of the room. “Not just now. Not because of Arrakis. I’ve needed you for as long as I can remember. Please just let me.”

The tears that had begun to dry on your cheeks threatened to return, but this time, they weren’t tears of sorrow or guilt. They were tears of relief, of knowing you never had and never would be alone in your care for him. Paul is there for you, just as you are there for him. Paul will worry for you, just as you were there for him.

"I'll let you, if you let me." There was a slight teasing smile on your lips, though its effect was lessened my the glossiness that remained in your eyes.

"I swear to."

You hummed, ducking your head back down to hide in his neck, breathing both him and the moment in.

“I'm afraid of it,” you admitted softly, your voice trembling. “Afraid of just how much I need you, even if you need me too.”

Paul’s expression softened even more, if that was possible. He gently tugged your face back up to meet his, so he could rest his forehead against yours and cup your cheek. His closeness was dizzying – but you much preferred this form of dizziness. You felt tethered to him in a way you had never felt with anyone else, like the two of you were the only ones in this vast, overwhelming world who truly understood one another.

“You don’t have to be afraid,” he murmured, lips almost brushing yours due to your proximity. “Not with me.”

Your breath hitched, your heart racing against his as you looked into his eyes. His thumb brushed across your cheek again, his touch as soft as ever, and before you could stop yourself, before you could dare to think twice, you closed the gap between you, pressing your lips to his in a tentative, gentle kiss.

Paul responded immediately, his hand moving to cradle the back of your neck, pulling you closer as his lips moved against yours with a slow, deliberate tenderness. The kiss wasn’t rushed, wasn’t frantic – it was filled with years of unspoken longing, of quiet moments that had been leading up to this. It was a kiss that felt like home, like something you had been waiting for without even realising it.

When you pulled back, your foreheads still resting together, both of you breathing softly, you felt the weight of everything lift, if only for a moment. It all faded into the background, leaving only the two of you, together, in the quiet safety of this moment.

“I’m not going anywhere,” you whispered, echoing the unspoken promise between you. “Not without you.”

Paul’s lips quirked into a small, almost boyish smile, the kind you hadn’t seen from him in so long. He pulled you into his chest again, wrapping his arms around you in a tight, reassuring embrace. You could feel the tension leaving his body, as if holding you like this had given him the strength he had been searching for.

"Take care of me, Paul?" you whispered, knowing now that this is what he needed.

He sighed, relieved, whispering a yes, please into your hair before placing a series of kisses there, holding you unbelievably tighter. His hands went back to massaging your neck and temples, moving languidly as he did anything he could think of to make you more comfortable in the moment.

For a long while, neither of you said anything. You simply stayed there, wrapped in each other’s arms, the world outside your door quiet and distant. This was the kind of rest you had truly been needing.

“I will always be here for you,” Paul whispered against your hair again, as if he needed to reassure himself of it. “I swear it.”

"And I you, my love."

You held him closer, letting your eyes drift shut and your body aches ease. You let yourself believe him. Because you knew, deep down, that this wasn’t just another comforting assurance. It was a vow, one that would last long beyond the move to Arrakis. 

No matter what storms came, no matter what weight the future held, you and Paul would face them together.

[pillow-princess-diaries]

𝚂𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚊𝚕 𝙺𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚎𝚛 𝙳𝚊𝚣𝚊𝚒! 𝚇 𝙰𝙵𝙰𝙱!𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛...

Scenario: your lovely and charming boyfriend has a dark secret; but you’re chill with it~

Pairing: Serial Killer! Dazai X AFAB! Reader

Genre: Smut

Type: scenario in hc format

W/C: 1.07k (i think😭)

T/W: murder (kinda obvious 🥲),slight yandere-like behavior mentioned,kinda public sex (they fuck in a warehouse),gunplay,blowjob,cum eating,cockwarming,dirty talk, a little bit of degradation (slut,degenerate) a little bit of bein in a mating press,aftercare☺️ (please lmk if i missed anything!🙏)

A/N: hey yall!! Inspiration finally hit me and voila! Hope yall like it and see ya in the next one!

MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DON'T FOLLOW, YOU'LL BE BLOCKED!

Serial Killer Dazai! Who comes off so lovely sweet and nice! Your parents,friends,EVERYONE LOVE HIM!

Serial Killer Dazai! Who gets borderline yandere like for you.he loves you and he needss to keep you safe,especially from people like him.but most importantly he needs you to not leave because he needs at least one good thing in his life dammit!

Serial Killer Dazai! Who suddenly gets awkward around you…he’s hiding something and you know he’s good at that…the fact that he’s letting you notice is a sign he wants you to ask him what it is

Serial Killer Dazai! who tells you what he is and what he does,he has (crocodile)tears in his eyes as he tells you, hes so scared you’ll leave him! (No he’s not~he knows you cant leave not while he’s in charge)

Serial Killer Dazai! who’s genuinely surprised when you kiss his tears away,telling him it’s okay and you dont mind. Hes so stunned! And definitely loves that you’re just as fucked up as he is.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who asks you if you wanna come out ‘hunting’ with him.even lets you pick the victim sometimes!!!

Serial Killer Dazai! Who sets up a seat and makeshift stage for you to watch your show.it’s in an old warehouse so no one will even disturb you~

Serial Killer Dazai! who absolutely dements his victims,the look of fascination and curiosity on your face fueling his sadistic behavior.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who notices you shift uncomfortably in your seat,your thighs clamping together and rubbing oh so subtly.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who gets hard at the sight and quickly finishes the kill to get back to you~

Serial Killer Dazai! Who gets his bloody gun,and cleaning it before he stores it for future use;who unbuckles his pants as he makes his way to you.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who hovers above your seated form, his clothed erection at your eye level.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who kneels before you and carasses your cheek saying, “shh bella…relax…ill take care of you~” before kissing you passionately. His skilled tongue exploring the expanse of your mouth.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who pulls aways for air,a single thread of saliva connecting the two of you.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who puts his thumb in your mouth for to suck. you do and his fingers taste vaguely metallic from holding the gun.

Serial Killer Dazai! who cant help but snap a quick picture of you before pulling out his finger and licking it before ordering you to get up,taking your seat and pulling out his pistol. He undoes his pants and underwear ,his cock springing free,precum already leaking from its tip.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who cocks the gun and smirks when you instantly get to your knees and pump his erection before blowing him.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who relishes in the feeling of your mouth around his length ,he holds the loaded gun to your head,the gasp of fear sending a pleasant vibration along his cock, “do me well bella,maybe ill let you cum tonight~”

Serial Killer Dazai! who ,feeling his first release coming on, hold your head down and thrusts up lightly, making you gag, before cumming down your throat.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who makes you swallow every last drop,the idea if his release filling you up in more ways than one driving him insane. “You’re such a fuxking slut for me arent you?you fuxking degenerate” he moans as he sees you swallow.

Serial Killer Dazai! who instructs you to sit on his dick and ride him.who puts the gun in your mouth,ordering you to suck it as you cockwarm. His occasional thrusts causing you to gag on the metallic weapon.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who isnt satisfied and picks you up by the ass (his cock still buried in your cunt) and pins you against a wall.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who brings your legs up around his waist and begins to relentlessly pound into you. In and out so fast its making you go cross-eyed! (He loves the sight~)

Serial Killer Dazai! who begins to work your neglected clit with the tip of his gun. The cold metal sending shivers from your pussy all through your body.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who locks you in a mating press,you jolt against the wall and your pretty moans resonate all through the empty warehouse.

Serial Killer Dazai! who brings your attention to the body right behind you both. He leans in close saying, “did ya enjoy that one bella? Did you see the fear in his eyes? Did it make you wet?” (All rhetorical questions of course)

Serial Killer Dazai! Who’s voice lowers, becoming gentler,raspier as he says,“did i do good? Did you…like it? Did i make you proud?” This wasnt the man who’d been killing a random accountant from the bar moments ago…no. It was him in his most vulnerable form,a child seeking to do good.to be the best

Serial Killer Dazai! Whose eyes darken the moment you nod, and just like that he was back to his usual self,he thrust back into you, “Good.now cum for me you little slut🖤” he says,kissing you passionately, an oddly love filled gesture in a rather lustful scenario.

Serial Killer Dazai! who moans your name as you cum around his cock,he reaches his climax not long after and the feeling gets him moaning even louder.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who lets you down and pulls your panties back up,your cum-stuffed hole still leaking from both of your releases.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who casually makes you rest back on the chair as he drenches the body in gasoline before promptly dropping a lit match into it.he steps back, and admires his handiwork before turning back to you and askin if you’re okay.

Serial Killer Dazai! Who carries you back to his car and drives u both home.who gives you a lovely bath to wash off the blood,cum and dirt (you come out of it with a few more hickeys than you went in with, but its fineeee)

And finally, Serial Killer Dazai! Who gets into his paw patrol pjs before cuddling up to you and holding you close. He’s forever greatful for you and will never stop thanking the stars for blessing him with an absolute angel.

Tag list(open):- @diagonal-queen @sapphic-serenade

All rights reserved © 2023 pillow-princess-diaries. Please do not repost, modify or claim as yours. Reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated!

[primussavethesemechs]

I want the human/cybertronian life difference to be talked about more in canon

Cuz I mean. it’s RIGHT THERE.

Just a smidgen of true acknowledgment I BEG YOU HASBRO‼️

i mean come on all it takes is someone mentioning how long the wars been going for one of the humans to go “4 MILLION YEARS???? WHAT THE FUCK HOW OLD ARE YOU???”

And optimus or ratchet to be like “…5/7 million?” And all of the humans to have a break down CUZ WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOUVE BEEN ALIVE SINCE BEFORE THE HUMAN SPECIES EXISTED??? WE WERE MONKEYS WHEN YOU WERE BORN???

And the (woefully uniformed) cybertronians to be like “??? What do YOU mean your species was still evolving when I onlined, how long do you guys live?? A thousand?? A few hundred??”

And the gobsmacked humans to be like “??? NO WE HARDLY LIVE OVER A HUNDRED ITS CONSIDERED AN ACCOMPLISHMENT?? AVERAGE OLD AGE DEATH IS LIKE MID 80s!! TECHNICALLY THE AVERAGE LIFE SPAN IS 72 OR SOMETHING???”

Cue the autobots being like “😨 72??? THATS A CHILD WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT⁉️”

the more attached/emotional bots looking at their charges and realizing that not only are they sparklings compared to them but they’ll die as sparklings too in just a few decades, causing them to straight up have a mini meltdown.

Yeah they’re in a war and they’ve lost plenty of friends, but never to anything as predictable and inescapable as old age.

It’s the seeing-it-coming part that gets to them, the slow dread of knowing that even if they do everything right and keep them out of danger and they stay healthy there’s nothing they can do to stop them from withering away in a couple of decades.

Most versions of bumblebee looking at their charge/friend and realizing his assumptions about the fact that since they’re both still young that they’ll have plenty of time to just. Live together and have fun- are wrong?? Immediately tears. Even if cybertronians can’t cry tears he’s doing whatever the equivalent is and running away to cry in his room. And then running back to snatch them and take them with him cuz HE CANT WASTE A SECOND IF THEIR LIFESPANS ARE REALLY THAT SHORT HES GONNA JUST HAVE TO SPEND 24/7 WITH THEM

This whole concept ESPECIALLY applies to TFP since all of them got their own little human buddy and there’s only like 5 autobots to begin with (of the main season 1 crew) they’ve lost so many of their own so recently, their numbers are already dwindling down to nothing, they’re losing the war and the kids are what’s given them a major morale boost. To continue fighting they need hope, and the kids have kind of become their hope for the future- to know they’ll die off in under a century despite how young they still are is a shot to the spark.

Look me in the eye and tell me bee wouldnt panic hearing that Raf only has 70-80 years to live. LOOK ME IN THE EYE AND TELL ME HE WOULDNT HAVE SOME KIND OF FIT OVER BEING TOLD THAT HIS LITTLE BUDDY (from a cybertronian perspective) HAS A LIFESPAN EQUIVALENT TO A LATE STAGE TERMINAL ILLNESS DIAGNOSIS. Bee would start treating Raf like a kid with stage 4 cancer 😭

I just KNOW bulkhead would have the worst reaction other than bee, maybe even worse cuz he looks at miko and realizes she’s used up basically a fifth of her entire lifespan already and she’s Still So Little and straight up starts weeping. That’s his DAUGHTER you can’t take her from him so soon it’s not FAIR! He might have to go destroy a canyon wall or something to let some of the anger and grief out

Arcee is Not taking it well either.

She JUST got attached to this one, just got used to a new partner and your telling her that no matter what she does he’s never going to last as long as tailgate of cliff jumper did?? Even if both he and she do everything they’re supposed to do to protect him and extended his life?? Depression time baby

Optimus and ratchet don’t react as much outwardly to the news as the others but inside they’re both 💔💥

These kids have brought optimus a level of contentment he hasn’t felt in vorns, and he sees how bright their spirits shine- Only to now know those precious spirits will burn out in less than a century- it gnaws at him inside, yet another strike from the cruelty of fate

Ratchet is devastated but refuses to acknowledge it, these kids- yes even miko- have become his pseudo grandkids and he’s not ready, nor will he ever be ready, to outlive them. Jacks reminds him too much of a younger optimus, still learning and still hopeful. Miko is… well she has a fire to her that ratchet can appreciate (when she’s not actively annoying him) she’s determined enough to make anything happen which he does begrudgingly respect even if he wishes she wouldn’t just throw herself into any and every situation just for fun.

And Raf…

Raf is his apprentice, the only one of the kids to understand him and listen intently to his stories of cybertron. To show appreciation for his work and his ideas, to Listen and Learn and Improve his inventions. He harbors the most fondness for Raf since he sees so much potential in him, and has taken him under his wing in teaching him cybertronian language and biology.

He feels almost like he’s training a student to take his place- only for the ground to be ripped out from under him to know that Raf will never have the chance to succeed him, will never even outlive him.

A parent should never have to bury their child, and ratchet already feels that he has.

-

TLDR the autobots find out humans have fruit fly lifespans next to them and become one big soggy mess of tears, optimus and ratchet included although they try to have a stiff upper lip about it (and fail to varying extents)

I swear this was supposed to be about any and all continuities but TFP took over completely😭 idk it just fits the best since they focus so much on how attached the bots get to the kids

Edit: btw this was inspired from the fact I found out that the cybertronian equivalent to a year (yes I know technically they have solar cycles which are roughly a human year but what they consider a year vs their lifespan/time perception is different) is a vorn. A vorn is 80 HUMAN YEARS. I saw that and went “oh wow a vorn is like a whole human lifespan!😃” and then I went “OH A VORN IS A WHOLE HUMAN LIFESPAN 😀“

[catch-me-hello]

Boys Planet, Episode 12 (Finale): Finally, Immortality.

The finale snuck up on me. Boys Planet is listed as having 13 episodes, but it turns out Episode 13 is commentary, and Episode 12 is the finale. I should have known, since this episode is 4 hours long. I’m ready. Let’s do this.

We open on a message from our very first Star Master, who gives us a montage of everything up until now. We started with 98 trainees who spent over 1,000 hours in rehearsals. Over the course of the show, over 131 million votes have been cast. And now it’s down to 18 finalists. We’re at Jamsil Indoor Stadium with 7,000 Star Creators in attendance. The screen shots I’m getting aren’t doing it justice. It’s breathtaking.

We jump right into the show, with the trainees performing the theme song, “Here I Am.” I think this is going to be like the Wild Idol finale, where we see performances of all the songs from the show. We’re getting amazing aerial shots and hearing the fan chants echo through the stadium. What an amazing experience for these guys. Even the ones who don’t make it to the end will be able to say they performed at Jamsil Stadium in front of thousands of screaming fans.

The trainees are being very deliberate and careful with the choreography in this opening number so they can stay pretty for the cameras. These are their final moments of screen time with the voting viewers at home, so each move is more like a pose. Their hair cannot get mussed or their makeup smudged. They have to maintain that perfect idol look.

The eliminated trainees are also here, looking a little bummed. This has to be really hard on them. This is the first show I’ve recapped where they’ve made the eliminated trainees show up for the finale to watch the amazing opportunity they lost out on.  When they realize the cameras are on them, they smile and give the thumbs-up, or finger hearts, or any other sign to show us that they’re not at all dying inside and wishing they could have faked an illness to avoid having to sit through this.  No Mercy wishes it were this cruel on its trainees.

The stage crew is at the top of their game, as always. We get shooting flames and indoor fireworks, which are amazing. Our finalists look really nervous. This is probably the biggest show they’ve ever played, except maybe for Hui, and it must be a little terrifying. Plus, their futures are on the line.

We cut to one-on-one interviews with the trainees, filmed in a studio before this show. This segment is called “Last Words.” We learn a bit more about them. Sung Han Bin got his barsita certification while training. Zhang Hao plays his violin while telling us about the times he wanted to give up and go back to teaching. Through all these clips, we get the sense that these trainees feel like they’re running out of time. The older they get, the smaller their chances are to debut.

I’m still not used to hearing some of these trainees speaking English. It’s my native language, but when I hear it spoken on a K-pop show, it feels foreign.

Speaking of English, we see Jay playing the drums. He’s being presented as “Rockstar Jay,” which is an interesting rebrand to do on the very last episode of the series. We also learn that Gun Wook was a debate champ in school who was always president or vice president of his class. These stories bring a relatable humanity to people striving to become immortal  K-pop idols.

Back to the arena, and hey, they let the judges out of that awful room! They’re here in the arena with everyone else! I hope they’re okay and got the medical attention they needed. In the meantime, they’ve all been given mics, so they give us the first of what I’m sure will be many, many speeches about how much the trainees have improved over the past several weeks. Let’s just assume, to keep this recap from going into hundreds of pages, that all they will be talking about is how much the trainees have improved. If one of them gets caught on a hot mic saying they can’t believe how these talentless losers made it this far, I’ll be sure to let you know.

Our Star Master greets the eliminated trainees, and to my happy surprise, he singles out Wumuti and asks what he’s been up to. Wumuti thanks the Star Creators and talks about how grateful he is for the experience he had on the show, and I just love him.   I hope he has an amazing K-pop career.

Now we go back to the Star Master, and I just have to bring up the weird pauses. He says one or two sentences, stares blankly at the camera for several seconds, then looks back at his notecards like he’d forgotten he was holding them, and says another couple of sentences. Occasionally during these pauses, the camera cuts to the judges or the audience, and they are all sitting there staring at the Star Master in confusion like they don’t know what he’s waiting for either. He looks like someone has a gun pointed at him just offscreen. It’s a hostage video. He’s like this for the entire show.

Just as I’m wondering if maybe someone should be calling the police, we cut to a flashback of the trainees’ last day of practice before the show, and I’ve never been so happy to cut to a flashback in my life. In this clip, the judges walk into a huge practice room to find all the trainees dressed like flowers. Then we flash back within the flashback to show the trainees making their costumes.  They’re also making cakes. Because with the finale just 24 hours away, I’m sure this is the best use of their time.

Back to the original flashback, as they present the cakes to the judges while wearing their flower costumes. That’s really sweet, but you guys know how insanely complicated the “Jelly Pop” choreography is, right? Maybe go practice some more?

So after they present the cakes, they do a final rehearsal for the judges. They all do a great job, especially the “Jelly Pop” team with the difficult choreo. Then the judges choose the trainee who has shown the most improvement. It’s Park Han Bin, who receives a Boy’s Planet medallion. He is clearly moved.

The judges also hand out detailed written evaluations to all the trainees. They’re words of encouragement and congratulations on their hard work, and I get a little misty-eyed as the trainees read them.

Flashback over. We’re back to our awkward Star Master in the arena. Now it’s time to find out what the name of the final group will be. We’re told the name represents a free journey from zero to one, the brilliant beginning of the group. It is, as we already know, ZeroBaseOne, or ZB1. It’s hard to get a read on the audience reaction because they’re all either wearing COVID masks or hiding their faces behind their signs. We also don’t get to see the reactions of our 18 finalists.

Well, that felt anticlimactic. Moving on to the performance of “Jelly Pop.” It’s time to see if Seok Matthew held on to the Killing Part. We’re still getting these strange pauses from our Star Master, and the cameras keep cutting to the judges, who look bored until they realize they’re on camera. What is going on here? Everyone looks like they’re being forced to do this show against their will.

Anyway, to see if Matthew kept the Killing Part, we get another flashback. The two teams have to create promotional videos for their songs. On Team Jelly Pop, Na Kamden gets roped into dressing in drag and playing a princess. He’s a remarkably good sport. The video is cute silliness, and it looks like they had fun filming it.

Now on to the competition for the Killing Part. The team films several videos of the choreo, each with a different trainee in the Killing Part. After the Star Creators vote, the part gets reassigned to Zhang Hao. I’m not really surprised. He’s the only one whose voice stays strong and steady during the difficult dance steps. Matthew takes it well, peeling off his Killing Part sticker and putting it on Zhang Hao’s jacket.

Back to the arena. Team Jelly Pop emerges on a rising platform, dressed in demin. The audience wakes up and starts cheering. Then the song kicks in, and our trainees nail the choreo. They really worked their asses off to get this right. They look like they’re having a lot of fun, playing to the cameras and the huge arena audience.

Back to our hostage of a Star Master. He asks the judges for their opinions, they loved it, moving on. The judges are sitting with their backs to the audience, so this can’t be too exciting to watch in person. It feels like they’re filming a small television show in an enormous stadium. As much as I love Jamsil Stadium, they really should have filmed this in a smaller venue.

Now for Team Hot Summer. Sung Han Bin has the temporary Killing Part. Let’s flash back to what they’ve been up to, starting with their promotional video. Lee Jung Hyun has to put on the dress for this one. If they can even afford the dress. The team spends most of its budget eating their way through a food market. Finally, they buy the dress and wig and film the actual video, which the show makes a point of telling us has no connection to the production crew, songwriter, or lyricist. One look at this video, and I know the show was just joking, but … yeah.  It’s not good.

Now for everyone to compete for the Killing Part, even though everyone is pretty sure Sung Han Bin is going to keep it. He’s been unstoppable. Still, as I watch the video auditions, my vote is for Ricky. He’s got the sexy, dangerous vibe that matches this song perfectly. Unfortunately, he makes some mistakes in his audition, so  I don’t think he’ll get it. Nothing against Sung Han Bin. I just think it’s time for someone else to shine.

The votes come in. Sung Han Bin gets it. Of course he does. I like him, and I know he’ll probably make it into the final group, but it gets a bit dull watching him come out on top every single time. That’s the downside of the Jooheon Pledge.

Back to the arena for the official performance. I like this song a lot better than “Jelly Pop.” These boys do not disappoint.

Star Master says it was great, the judges say it was great.  Saying it was great takes up a good six or seven minutes. Let’s move on.

Star Master says the voting is now closed. While the votes are being calculated, it’s time for another flashback. In this one, the trainees are given a surprise mission. They’re immediately suspicious, since their last surprise mission was the Little Prince musical theater project. But no, this is a chance for them to thank the Star Creators through a live broadcast online. The trainees decide to hold an online pajama party.

My initial reaction was to cringe, but it actually turns out being really fun to watch. They do funny skits, answer fan questions, and do aegyo (cute baby behavior), all while wearing pajamas.

We learn a lot about the trainees, like the fact that Gun Wook sleeps with his eyes open, which is rather unsettling. Jay gets a fan request to recreate his sexy moves from the “Over Me” performance. He happily obliges, and somehow it’s even hotter in pajamas.

The whole group performs some of the songs from the show. I’m really enjoying this segment, and it’s about to get even better. The trainees are surprised when fans from all over the world appear on the monitors in front of them and send messages of love in person.

The love pouring from the hearts of these fans is beautiful. The trainees start crying when the fans tell them to keep chasing their dreams no matter what, because their singing brings happiness to the fans.

My favorite message is from an American fan to Hui. She tells him, “I wanted to let you know that when it comes to being loved, being supported, being talented, being successful, there’s no age limit to that.”

And now I’m crying along with the trainees.

Seriously, that got me right in the feels. I’m okay now. Moving on.

Back to the arena. We get all the trainees singing a lovely ballad called “Not Alone.” I might start crying again. Can we go back to the painfully awkward Star Master, please? When the song ends, even the finalists are a bit emotional, fighting off tears as they listen to the audience cheering. They keep looking around like they can’t believe they’re standing on this stage.

Afterward, Star Master asks for a reaction from eliminated trainee and vogueing king Cha Woong Ki, and it’s good to see his smiling face again. He says he’s happy to be present as ZeroBaseOne is born, sharing this morning with his friends. It’s really sweet. Other former contestants share their love as well, even though it must be really hard for them to sit through this, watching the amazing experience they could have had. The other shows we’ve seen so far just let the eliminated trainees go home. I’d definitely prefer that.

Now we get what we’re promised is our last flashback to the days leading up to this episode. Our trainees get a sleepover in one of the big training rooms, which I’m not sure is a good thing because they’ve already been crammed together in the dorms all this time. However, this turns out to be a positive bonding session. They stay up late, talking about their first impressions of each other. There’s a great moment when Hui and Jay confess to being completely intimidated when they heard each other sing. Even though Jay won’t make it to the final group, it’s a huge show of respect when an accomplished K-popper like Hui says he’s impressed with his singing.

Everyone remembers being shocked by Kim Ji Woong’s outfit when he first appeared on the show – a buttoned blazer with no shirt underneath. This is really no big deal in the US, but apparently it’s considered very racy in Korea, same as when Park Do Ha first appeared with the top few buttons of his shirt undone. Korea is a REALLY conservative country.

We see that the boys are sleeping next to the wall where all the trainees wrote messages on before the last elimination. They tell each other they need to perform well for the sake of their friends who got eliminated. I get it. Those friends lost a chance to debut. The survivors not giving outstanding performances would be a show of disrespect for what they lost.

Speaking of which, back to the Jamsil Arena. It’s now time to name the final nine winners. And since we have two hours left, I’m guessing they’re going to drag this out as long as possible. Before we proceed, I have to say this is the most stunning visual of the entire series. Our nine winning group members will be climbing a stairway to the stars. Huge props to the team that designed and built this set.

The ninth place, the last surviving spot, will be called last. So now, we’re starting with Number Eight. It will be interesting to see how many Group G trainees make it into ZeroBaseOne, so I’ll be tracking that. After all, the show’s originally stated mission was to bring more foreigners into K-pop, and even after they stopped pitting the two groups against each other, the trainee outfits still had the Group G or Group K colors on them. They may have stopped talking about it, but those outfits are clearly stating that it’s still the point of this show.

True to the usual procedure of these finales, there are looooong periods of silence as the Star Master drags out the suspense before calling out a name. The cameras zoom in on the finalists’ faces as they try hard not to look like they’re about to pass out.

8th place is Kim Ji Woong. He’s in the K Group. Our former BL actor has been reunited with his first love, K-pop. That blazer with no shirt has paid off for him. Just like in Wild Idol, he’s asked to say a few words, and he’s gracious and humble. We see his beaming parents in the audience.

All the families of the finalists are in the audience, and it’s moving to see them crying with joy and waving banners with their finalist’s picture on them.

7th place is Kim Gyu Vin. Also in K Group. In the audience, his father is beaming. I can’t imagine what the families go through when their kid decides they want to become a trainee.

Gyu Vin was the first member of Group K to get the All Star in the first episode. He went on to be the top vote-getter on Team En Garde. Now, he’s so overwhelmed, he can barely pull himself together to speak. He needs several minutes, and he’s still crying through his speech. When thanking the Star Creators, he speaks in perfect English. “To love somebody takes a lot of time and energy. Thank you for your time and energy.”

6th place is Kim Tae Rae. Another Group K trainee. A crowd favorite, he gets the biggest cheer of the night so far. Even the judges get teary-eyed. He’s one of the best vocalists in the group of trainees.

I have been avoiding the viewer comments button on the screen because the comments usually contain spoilers and infighting. However, I did turn on the button at this point, and it’s not lost on the viewers that so far, all the winners are in Group K. The three who have won so far deserve to be there, but it’s interesting.

5th place is, finally, Park Gun Wook! I knew it was coming, but it’s so great to see. This guy has been through so much. I love how absolutely stunned he looks. Our Wild Idol trainee finally gets to debut. (Again, another member of Group K. So far, that’s four out of nine group members from South Korea.)

It’s at this point that I had to turn off the viewer comments button. Everyone seems happy about Gun Wook winning, but now they’re fighting about the finalists who haven’t been called yet and insulting each other. The internet can really suck sometimes.

4th place is Ricky! Yes! One of the ones I was betting on, and finally, our first trainee from Group G. He was born ready to debut. He’s so stunned, he has to look to his fellow trainees to make sure he heard right.

Another fan favorite. The Star Creators are losing their minds. I’ve seen so many banners with his name on them over the course of the show,  I can recognize the name “Ricky” written in the Korean alphabet. I love how he recovers from the shock and regains his cool, suave confidence when giving his thank-you speech.

Interesting side note. All through the show, I’ve wondered why Ricky has a strip of tape on the side of his neck. In his acceptance speech, he tells us it’s covering a tattoo that says “role model.” He got the tattoo to remind himself to always behave like a role model. The show made him keep it covered up. Korea is a very, VERY conservative country.

3rd place is Seok Matthew.  Our Canadian from Group G. He also needs a few minutes to pull himself together.  When he finally does speak, he says he had started to lose confidence recently, and I’m reminded of how this show painted him as a spoiled brat in later episodes and I how fell for it.

He says the support of his fellow trainees pulled him through that tough time. He thanks his family for letting him come to South Korea, and I’m reminded again just what a scary thing it is for young foreign trainees to move to a new country by themselves in the first place.

First and second places will be announced together, because K-pop survival reality shows cannot function if they’re forced to observe numerical order. The next two names called will be candidates for the Number One spot.

They are Zhang Hao and Sung Han Bin. We already know how this will end. Sung Han Bin has kept the Number One spot since the very first ranking. And this is one more trainee from Group K and one from Group G. I guess the show is keeping its word to welcome foreigners to K-pop. Now to just get the ranking out of the way for these two.

They both express their gratitude and love for the Star Creators and wait for the final result. So after dragging it out with long pauses to the point that I want to rip the tape off Ricky’s neck and strangle the Star Master with it, we finally hear the expected result that …

Oh. My. God.

It’s not Sung Han Bin. He ranks second. The Number One spot goes to Zhang Hao.

I can’t believe it. Sung Han Bin hugs Zhang Hao, who keeps asking if he heard correctly. It’s the K-pop upset of the year. Or century. I’ve only been a K-pop fan for about ten months, so I don’t really grasp the historical significance of this event in relation to the genre as a whole BUT STILL THIS IS HUGE!

And it marks the breaking of the Jooheon Pledge. I’m sure wherever Joohoney is right now, he’s already over it.

So our top two finalists take their seats, and now it’s time to find out the 9th and final spot. I still have Keita and Park Han Bin on my betting list.

9th place goes to Han Yu Jin. This K Group finalist falls to his knees and to be helped to his feet by the remaining contestants. It really is amazing that he made it here. He had a fever in the first few episodes and had to power through.

I love seeing these trainees climb the steps to be greeted by the other group members. They look like they’re actually rising up to join the stars in the sky. It also looks like a soul rising to heaven and being greeted by family and friends who went before him. These trainees are getting a shot at immortality.

So now for the logical question. Did ZeroBaseOne go on to make good music?

Help me out, Wikipedia and YouTube.

Their first EP, Youth in the Shade, came out in July 2023 and was a huge hit. ZeroBaseOne won 10 rookie awards in their first year, including the MAMA Awards and Seoul Music Awards. Their second EP, Melting Point, was released in November 2023 and sold over two million copies in its first week of release.

They’ve had many more successes since then, but I haven’t heard any of their music, so off to YouTube I go.

30 minutes later…

I like them. I like the songs, especially the harmonies. They’re definitely leaning more toward the Pretty Boy Idol sound and image, and I get why that appeals to so many K-pop fans. It’s just that over the past few months, especially after I became a Monsta X and ATEEZ fan, I go for the edgier, Beast Idol sound and image.

But I’m happy ZeroBaseOne is doing so well, especially for Gun Wook. I clicked “subscribe” on their YouTube channel and will check in on them from time to time.

Now, we have one more essay to go. Time to work through these pins.

[molluskmirage]

I have been deeply perturbed by the revelation that the qsmp egg admins (and other admins) have been unpaid. Anyone but particularly young folks are taken advantage of a lot in the working sphere and it makes me feel deeply ill.

The amount of love those admins have clearly had for this smp and what it stands for is absolutely highlighted all the more. Every time they were on especially if not ‘required’ by plot, thats just pure love. Love for loves sake. And it kills me to know all the obstacles they may have faced irl to work on something purely for passion.

no money. no fame. no name. Every egg always fell quiet upon jokes or jests of there payment. No sass because there was nothing. Nothing to show their families nothing to fund this ‘lifestyle choice’ thats a job that doesnt pay. Being characters synonymous with the series, begged for, all the while with nothing. While the streamer they attend to is getting dono’s they preform on screen. Their streamers meet together offline at big events, while they’re not even supposed to communicate over call with one another. Left behind with nothing, if they want merch from the streamer they hangout with day in and out they must buy it from there own pocket.

(speculation on my part but Dappers admin started getting burnt out around summer, they also hinted at building things behind the scenes, did they do so because that was paid work? Man so many little moments make my stomach turn)

this is a very serious matter.

this isnt to make everything either good or evil. People not getting paid for the work they do is bad. While I can hold the hope and hold accountable that the right thing (in payment and back payment) will and must be done, I hold it very dear when I say there is damage. Nearly an entire year these wonderful human beings have worked for nothing. The same or more work the streamer they are accompanying is praised for. So much goes on in a year that having no pay to show for work done is appalling and detrimental towards. It makes my skin crawl with all the possibilities behind the scenes. I am both incredibly angry and upset.

I do not know how Quackity was unaware. I am ignorant on how that is the case. I will believe it as the admin’s statements have been so but I am deeply disappointed. I do not believe him ‘evil’ he is human but people who are under his name are not having their needs met and I take that very seriously. His mission is good his love is good but this absolutely must be rectified. Not of criticism but of fact it must be done.

young people get taken advantage of so often and quackity himself could be swept up into that category, I am unaware of the particulars behind the project but as its in q’s name he is the one I am looking towards.

I have no particular ills to speak about quackity other then this topic, once resolved can be forgiven but I find it more disheartening how many wish to downplay severity or that they themselves would be happy to work for free. Those attitudes perpetuate cycles of abuse. I so hope for a future were folks come to know their worth and how precious there time, energy and love really is, and that those abusing do better and honor that work or else suffer a downfall.

So sick of people being taken advantage of.

I do think things can be fixed but that does not negate that this is a very serious subject (to me personally). I can believe something is good but requires fixing without it being synonymous with bad or evil. If somethings broke you fix it and its fine. Right now its broke, were in the fixing stage so I reserve judgement upon why this occurred until presented with the fix.

I do not like to villainize or dramatize these people or situations, this topic is serious and needs appropriate care. This can be done. I have faith. What I dont like to see is downplaying needs or making monsters of men.

People need pay for their work.

[lilmotheea]

Hello friends, hope everyone is doing well! For the Days of Music event they seem to have changed the village! I wonder what new things will be added. After Days of Music has ended the area is now left under construction which leads me to believe something will be added to here! maybe this will just be the new event area.

inside the shop, the event area, and the rest of the shops, are no longer connected! I also found this weird area where theres a floating plant and looks like a party flag thing sticking out from the rocks. You can see it from the window in the cape/outfit shop area. Behind the turn table stage. I'm excited to see if they add a new cosmetic area or something! I love all the cosmetic's I've collected so far but I'm sad ill never get the cosmetics I've missed from special events or guides from past seasons :( but I'm sure there will be plenty of cute ones in the future!

I am a bit sad they didn't add snow to the village but its nice they changed the home area and even added a lil cozy spot. I think thats all for now friends! Tootles Your friend, Eea

[jiminsproof]

tag game 📺

I was tagged by Heather @summerwave to list 10 TV shows so that you besties could get to know me better! Thank you my dear, hope that this week has been good to you so far 💗🫂

Here goes:

Hannibal (nobody is surprised). I'm obsessed with this series, I know dialogues by heart, probably my ultimate favourite. I don't even know how many times I watched it but it's a LOT. Especially season 3, my favourite (where does the difference between the past and the future come from? ... mine? before you and after y- [gets dragged off stage])

Good Omens. I have just recently watched season 2 and it ripped my heart out in the best way possible!! I loved it, very cathartic, can't wait for s3 to fix this mess though 😭

Fleabag. Another TV series that I've watched very recently but moved me in many ways! Really heartbreaking and hilarious at the same time!!

The Untamed. One of the best character development I've seen! I loved how everyone got to explain their side of things, it was very refreshing and interesting to see. ALSO LAN XICHEN IS MY CHILD (and Wuxian obviously, mental illness bisexual king, also shoutout to the best line ever aka: If I am doomed to death, then I could at least be killed by you, that would be worth it 💯💯💯😧😧😧🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥 ATE. PEAK ROMANCE)

Killing Eve. I hated the ending but I loved the series for most of it! And I especially loved Eve's journey in this, it was so fascinating to watch her change!

Bad Buddy. Such an amazing TV series aka modern (and gay) retelling of Romeo and Juliet!

Word of Honor. I honestly think this series (similarly to The Untamed) has one of the best character development I've ever seen and it makes up for all its (more technical) shortcomings. I love the main characters and how they do not truly fit the hero archetype! Very refreshing. Heartbreaking in many ways, also fascinating female characters. It's all about unconditional love bro and breaking free of the harmful patterns created by a traumatic past- [gets booed, leaves in shame]

Love is Blind. Had to add in something silly as well 🤣 It's a reality show in which people fall in love not seeing each other. I will never understand straight people, this show is hilarious. I watch it for the memes

Sharp Objects. Incredible show with just the best female characters and allusions to mythology. Deals with a lot of dark topics and has an amazing plot twist! I loved its atmosphere.

Heartstopper. Despite having watched it only recently, I absolutely loved its depiction of queerness! Especially the refreshing treatment of bisexuality, which sometimes is lost even in BL dramas I've watched so far. Lovely!

Honourable mentions: Crash Landing on You, Kinnporsche, Vincenzo, It's Okay not to be Okay

Tagging some of my lovelies and giving each and every one of you the biggest hug!! 🫂 Also no pressure: @aprylynn, @blueside-hobi, @cordiallyfuturedwight, @kimchokejin, @banghwa, @india-stoker, @lyubins, @nodtnutthasid, @platypusplayhere, @raplinenthusiasts, @seraphjimin, @young-jae. 💗

[luminlunii]

I have some more details on Sedgewick in Trek for the Truth! Now, two things before I continue. One, no, there are NO horrible sexual things going on here or anywhere else in this AU! Because, I maybe mean with this AU, but I'm not THAT mean! I'm not putting the characters through that. Plus, that just makes me uncomfy, because reasons. So, we're just going to pretend that those horrible things like that don't exist in this AU! Unrealistic? Sure, but I just don't want it. Second, before anyone calls out any unrealistic issues like how humans might be cruel, but they would recognize this as slavery at this point. Regardless of how they feel/see the fictional characters. You're right, they would and it's still against the law in this universe. That being said, this type of situation I'm about to tell you, with the facility and this place, is like a Dark Web exchange. With that, I will continue. I told you he escapes and lost his hand, but there's more to Sedewick from when he was pawned off to another experimentation facility to his departure. He was pawned off to one of the worst, if not the worst experimentation facilities. Because this one, instead of letting illnesses or over experimentation take its course, they fucking have an auction for the ones that aren't sick. So they can take in more characters in they pick up. At the moment, this might be the only one that does this, but that might change in the future. It depends. Sedgewick, being not sick, was one of those people. He was auctioned off to this abusive rich asshole human to be his personal butler. However, there was still some hope. Since, what this guy is doing is still illegal, even in human terms. All that would need to happen is for this guy's actions to be brought to light and it'd be over. That's what Wick tried to do while he was there. Not just for himself, but for the other characters there in the same situation as him. Despite the very glaring warning signs he shouldn't. He starts to collect evidence, have a documentation diary of all the fucked things that happen there. One day, he "accidentally" leaves it behind with a note saying "Help us" at the dry cleaning. A good person, found it and reported it to the police. The police were only doing their job this time and investigated the situation. However, sadly for Sedgewick, this happened before. So, this guy was prepared and made it look really good favor in his favor. Like painting Wick as a disgruntled underpaid employee and a whole bunch of other things. Cops took that and left. If you're wondering, right after this, yes, this is how Wick loses his hand (or paw?). The guy cut off his hand as a punishment for daring to reach out at all. So, here comes the escape. However, I have like two ways it went down and I'm not sure which one to take for Wick. One is where he poisons all the humans at a party and takes everyone away from there. The other is he stages a coo,the place a blaze and taking everyone away from there. Which one sounds more like something Wick were to do if he were pushed to that point? Either way, he's left and took the other characters with him and ended up at the halfway houses in Canada. Which are part of the organization and are typically resting places for escapees from the facilities to rest before going to the organization. Though, sometimes the non sick ones stay to help the ones who are too sick to be mobile right away. Which is what Wick does.

So sorry I took so long to get back to you Anon! I've been busy with other stuff. :(

I agree with the first point, I can see why you wouldn't want stuff like that in your AU.

And your second point

Holy shit Wick loses a hand.

I don't think Wick has the capacity to stage a coup d'etat. French has so many vowels. So, I think the first option would suit Wick. He's a rich man, so I imagine he's proficient enough to pull off mass poisoning.

[digimon-smashorpass]

Hello!

I'm Mod V (any pronouns), and I also want to join in on the smash or pass pokemon fun but with Digimon. I love Digimon and think this might help spread some love for it on tumblr, even if it's all just silly. Even if you know very little about Digimon, I hope you come opinionated lol. I might even save the data and do a silly little bracket when it's all done, but that is for the future me to fiddle with when the time comes.

However, I am trying to decide how to post each poll as digimon don't really have a set numbering system, so this is part intro, part preliminary poll!

Choice explanations:

Evolution stage order: I post every digimon that is listed as Baby first, then move on to the next stage up. Start with ones like Upamon and then go to Agumon after those are done, then on to Greymon etc

Pop Icons to Nobodies: I post digimon like Agumon first, basically anyone that most people might know im a broad sense ("ive seen them!" Sorta thing) and then I get weirder with it

Alphabetical: exactly as it says on the tin. I got through a compiled list starting with A.

Easy to Hard: I post the most humanlike ones first and then devolve from there

No Preference: ultimately, it wont matter to you and ill have to make a choice

Also, secondary question (optional): would people like to see what i predicted and if the poll matches my thought when its over? (Aka i reblog with whether or not tumblr defys my expectations or not)

[thetruearchmagos]

The Fremont Reforms: The Commonwealth's Peacekeeping Army

Hey folks! This article is an offshoot of an offshoot of a bit I was hoping to get done yesterday, which might tell you something about how my writing's going these days. It goes over in brief some of the military reforms made by the United Commonwealth Army decades prior to the Chainbreaker War, hopefully setting some context for future posts on specific issues and the broader Chainbreaker War as a whole. It was written in a strange fugue of sorts, so... it's not exactly polished. Can't tell if its too detailed, or not detailed enough.

Tagging, if I may, @athenswrites @theprissythumbelina @lividdreamz @hessdalen-globe @thatndginger

The Way Things Are Done Here

As the United Commonwealth entered its fifth decade, its Army, not yet a decade old, found itself having fight the sorts of battles that it was entirely ill equipped to. Where it had once fought for the sovereignty of its new member states and the freedom of their people from foreign invasion in the Commonwealth's formative years, the Army now found itself pushed into conducting various peacekeeping crises and operations throughout the 50's A.S. These conflicts would see a fundamental shift in the way the Army fought and organised itself, and the need for change was brought to the forefront after the disastrous fate of one expedition conducted on Commonwealth soil, in the Battezid Empire.

These were wars not fought in open fields against and with massed ranks of musketry, but the tortuously demanding tasks of projecting power, control and political authority across vast stretches of underdeveloped countryside against disparate bands of raiders and separatists, in many cases sponsored out of the coffers of the Fuhrati Empire itself. Some issues, such as the need to support the needed forces across the Warp and 12 Worlds, were well enough known, but a host of new challenges faced the Commonwealth Army as it found itself thrust into this new style of conflict. One key tactical challenge facing every battalion and regiment deployed to these tasks was the tyranny of distance and the fog of war, which took on a new dimension against an enemy that simply was not an Army like itself. Foot patrols and columns on the march between settlements frequently grasped blindly where they went, and horse cavalry troops were conspicuous enough that the irregulars could simply hide and wait for them to pass. The infantry could only be sure of their own security within their immediate line of sight, and barely even at those distances when it seemed as if the population itself could hide their enemy. Instead of deploying into the field as full battalions, the strength of those formations was bolstered and sub-units created below the level of platoons to allow the battalion to disperse itself across as wide an area as possible. Those larger numbers were needed to sustain the high rate of constant patrols and staff the many outposts deemed necessary to protect civilian and government interests and project at least the image of Commonwealth or Commonwealth-aligned local authority. The employment of battalions in this manner may have succeeded in deterring small-scale banditry and raiding, but as the size, intentions and scope of irregular forces grew and shifted the Army failed to keep up. Soon, patrols of six soldiers or less became increasingly vulnerable to isolation by what were now larger groups of organised and armed irregulars, while the distances allowed between different companies and their own platoons made the concentration of those forces impossible. Combined with the dire state of communications between battalions or regiments and their constituent parts and the poor state of tactical intelligence for those formations, the stage was set for a catastrophe.

The Slaughter

That disaster would in September of 51 A.S., wintertime in southern Battezid, in a battle which would be remembered as the Siege of Pazotin. The 2nd Tomikawa Rifles, a unit which had been in-province long enough to get far too comfortable for its own good, faced down the greatest uprising yet seen. Rising in a great, coordinated tide across the countryside, scattered platoons found themselves facing three-to-one odds from a force which seemed to have appeared from thin air, and which just as readily disappeared back into it before striking again against another distant outpost. The battalion itself was entirely isolated from all but one of its four companies within Pazotin itself, in a siege which lasted most of a week before the rest of the regiment could march under constant harassment to relieve the defenders. More than half of the 2nd Tomikawa's strength was dead or wounded by the end of it, and no decisive damage was inflicted on the insurrectionists.

The defeat, and there was no question that it was anything but that, led to a public outcry and came close to crippling support for the Commonwealth’s policy of policing and peacekeeping at home and abroad. An inquiry initiated personally by the Chief of the General Staff, Field Marshal John Fremont, found a long series of endemic flaws throughout the command overseeing the province and theatre of operations. After damning the commanding general and Military District commander overseeing Battezid, the report recommended a bottom-up reform of the organisation, training, and doctrine of United Commonwealth Army forces deployed on such peacekeeping missions. The failures which had led to that fiasco had been in making for some time, and the depth of the Army's weaknesses in the region were put on display.

A New Old Army

The reforms outlined were thorough, and would take the better part of a decade to manifest. When and where they eventually did, the interests of the Commonwealth were much advanced by the now highly capable forces providing stability and peace to troubled and violent regions of the Commonwealth, its foreign allies, and its future members. The soldiers and officers who would grow into the Army under these reforms and be shaped by this kind of work would be the ones shaping the Army's culture for decades afterwards, and at the very least were slightly more open to the importance of necessary reforms in the future than their predecessors were.

It is, however, a great irony that the period in which the Commonwealth Army would achieve its greatest proficiency in the field of peacekeeping would coincide so closely with the creation of a completely different strategic picture. The Fuhrati Empire, whose belligerence and opposition to the UC's interests was well documented, and which had provided lavish assistance to the very irregular outfits the Commonwealth had fought to suppress, was growing rapidly in strength, and to the United Commonwealth's leaders it seemed as if war with the great slave empire could come at any moment as it entered the second half of the 60's A.S.

While the need for peacekeeping was ever-present, the Army would once again find itself facing down the barrel of another great challenge it had not yet equipped or designed itself for. And even though the service would have a head start in facing this new daunting task that it lacked when first thrown into its current one, the sheer weight of inertia meant that the Army that would find itself facing down the Fuhrati leviathan at the gates to Upepwani was caught somewhere in the middle, not quite a peacekeeping force thrust into a real war, yet hardly the modern, bayonet-sharp fighting force those few visionaries and theorists had hoped it would have become before the dogs of war were let loose. The lessons of this modern war, like the lessons of the previous breed of conflict, would have to be learned on the battlefield, and paid for in blood.

[minarcana]

@ichoric / i meant to write affection but i got carried away.

Minfilia's fallen ill, which really shouldn't surprise anyone. She's been isolated for a long time and since breaking free, been under great stress for most of the time. Urianger feels like he's the only one who isn't shocked that it took its toll. He walks up to the room that became designated as 'hers' since she first set foot in the Shelves a mere visit or two ago. He's carrying tea and small snacks and, at the demanding behest of some of the pixies, a.... thing? in a glass bottle that has some beneficial charm for the newest playmate.

She's staring guiltily at him from where she's cocooned herself in blankets. "I thought thou would be asleep, child," Urianger says as he sets down his plate of accoutrements. Minfilia mumbles a reply, shrinking away from him. He sits at the edge of the bed, looking off to the side of her. "'Tis no concern if thou are not. I brought tea to ease thy symptoms, if thou would like to partake."

After a pause, Minfilia shuffles around and carefully sits up, keeping the blanket around her shoulders. Uringer smiles at her and gives a quiet word of thanks before he passes her the mug he brought. She takes it and holds it close to her before she drinks a little.

Urianger watches as she stares down for a good few beats. "...Thancred's mad at me," she says in a tiny voice, a bit hoarse. "I'm holding him up."

Urianger blinks in surprise then cannot help but let out a quiet laugh. "No, not at all, my dear." He feels a little bad for laughing, especially as she looks at him with big worried eyes. Sorry, it's just that... well, Thancred is a bit difficult, isn't he? Urianger really will have to bother him more about being gentler with Minfilia, even if he's unsure that will work. "Thancred simply expresseth his concern poorly. Thy illness giveth him deep concern that shapeth itself as stress, I do believe. Whatever it is, 'tis not anger at thee, I assure thee fully."

He can hope that will ease Minfilia's worry, now and in the future when Thancred doubtlessly continues to express worry in only the most confusing ways possible for a sheltered teenager. She mulls it over, at least. "But it's my fault he can't bring us back on the road."

Ah, yes. He forgot that was actually supposed to be a problem. Urianger leans and gives a conspiratorial stage whisper for the first clause of his rebuttal. "I shall tell thee a secret, Minfilia, thou should convalesce as long as thou can get away with, for my hope is that it forceth Thancred to rest as well, and I much preferreth when I can see thee both safe." He flashes her a quick smile. "Do not let it slip, lest Thancred's gunblade find its way to my throat, but I did send him on his current quest to ask the good neighbours for some herbs largely to keep him from wearing furrows in mine floor with his pacing. 'Twas all a trick of mine own rather than thy imposition."

He does need some more supplies, and some would be of aid to Minfilia's current case, so it's technically not a lie, but Urianger is also well aware Thancred will take about twenty times longer on this quest than if Urianger did it himself.

Urianger reaches over and gently lays his hand on Minfilia's head. He doesn't miss the second where she flinches away from him, but it's too late for him to stop the movement by the time he realizes. The touch is soft and he leaves his hand harmlessly on her crown for a second. She seems surprised, honestly. "Never shalt thou be a burden, 'tis my gladness to be a help and Thancred's greatest concern that thou survive."

She relaxes. It makes Urianger feel rather victorious, especially when Minfilia looks up to meet his eyes with the hint of a smile. There, he's accomplished something in the way of reassurance, in some way making Minfilia a little more at ease in Il Mheg. She shifts a little closer, tension ekeing its way out of her position, and Urianger sits in more comfortable silence with her, mentally figuring a list of books he thinks she would like, so he can offer something while here.

[lqfiles]

just when i give up on my homework i see a new ptp chapter TODAY IS A GOOD DAY WE REJOICE!!! 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️

yn making the first move tho 😵‍💫#womeninmalefields

aside from that it’s me 📕 >_< still trying to survive in the battlefield (school) 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 i’m still in shock that you get days off THIS COULD OF BEEN ME but no 😕 i’m stuck drawing stupid graphs for econ and i don’t even get the point 💔💔 sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh #savemefromecon i don’t think you asked but it’s okay ill tell you anyways 💜 but i study maths, c*mp sci (💔) and economics am i okay? no. but how are youuu and how’s school 🥹🩷

however moving on

i feel as if there is going to be some miscommunication in the near future if so LQFILES PLEASE WE’VE HAD ENOIGh yn n haechan just got out of the awkward stage so pls 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔 like everything’s going well the gc knows, yn and haechan are in a somewhat good position, erm renjun and jaemin are renjun and jaemin i can just FEEL something’s about to happen 😵‍💫 praying i’m wrong

this has gone so many directions sorry 🥹 i just don’t know how to feel like there’s so much going on but not so much at the same time so it’s like where do we go from this

- 📕 ily until next time 😵‍💫🙂‍↕️

DONT GIVE UP ON YOUR HOMEWORK GET THOSE GOOD GRADES SIS 🔥🔥🙏🏽🙏🏽 and HELPPP i didn’t even clock that omggg she is so hashtag woman in men field, got her doing MALE jobs.

plsss economics is one those subjects that when i hear i’m just like “what the hell do they even learn there” like do you just get taught about… economy? YOU DESERVE BREAKS THOO i mean it probably has smrh to with you being an A level student which requires your full attention on all subjects while i only gotta focus on one but still.. free you! BUT WOAHH WE GOT SMARTYPANTS IN THIS CHAT i’m assuming it’s further maths?? the envy i feel rn girl… meanwhile had to retake maths because i hated that subjects like FUCK trigonometry actually!! it will get better tho don’t worry i’m rooting from here 🩷 i’ve been well, currently working on my personal statement for uni and trying to figure what direction i wanna take my life into. i’m contemplating between I.T and graphic design, whatever gets me money tbh 😭🙏🏽

its not a lqfiles fic without the constant “WE ARE SO BACK” “WE ARE SO NOT BACK” back and forth sorry aegi 😂 just tune and find out 😉😉 AND PLSSS i always have so many convos in one on here because i got so much to say so i getchu don’t worry we can talk about ANYTHINg i’m open to anything. hope you have a good night anon <333

[onmymasa22]

מה רציתי להגיד.

הייתי ממש רגישה נראה לי אתמול פשוט מזה שאמרת שזה משו שכולם עושים נכנסתי לסוג של שוק, ולהיות 100 אחוז כנה, שאר השיחה פשוט נסיתי להחזיק את עצמי לא לבכות. שזה קשור אלי.

אבל עכשיו אקלתי את מה שאמרת, כן התחלתי עם זה, כן החומר מעניין אותי מהמקום ש

הייתי במקום אומרת ופונה לכל הכיתה "כל כמה שנים, מישהי עושה קורי אכביש עם דבק חם"

הייתי אומרת

"מאיפה באת עם החומר הזה. כי קורה שסטודנתים בונים קורי אכביש מדבק אבל

, יש ימים שאנשים אומרים לי דברים ואני יכולה לקחת את זה מעוד בטוב. ביום הזה קצת הייתי בשוק מ

My dream

An art degree

A trauma informed yoga instructor

Emt

Work with old people with mental health issues

I want to work with old people being an emt

I want to

Start doing yoga. Do trauma informed yoga.

Start doing yoga

See if i like it

If i like it i can do it im the summer

Pronouns: likes/ pizza

I met someone that to talk to them is just a soft place to land. I just want to be a soft spot for him. His eyes are just magical.

Can i just say this without sounding weird. I like how we hugged long enough for me beathe out. Because to me thats a safeness feeling. The scrunch of my nose after because i cant do the eye contact from so close. I really can just look in his eyes for a while. I want a picture of his eyes. I want dreams about his eyes.

And if you call at 4am, too sad to even say hello, i will listen to your silence until you fall asleep

Waiting to be "ready" will crush dreams and rob the world of your creative power

Do it now. Do it wrong. Then do it again. Better.

And he found himself questioning if the reason she loved the rain so much was because she didn't want to cry alone

Hey, you could always be addicted to cocaine

Youre not hehind in life. Theres no timetable that we all must follow. Its made up. 7 billion ppl camt do everything in the same order. Whats early? Whats late? Compaired to who? Dont beat yourself up for where you are. Its YOUR schedule and everything is right on time.

When you finally learn that a persons behavior has more to do with their own internal struggle than it ever had to do with you, you learn grace

She wore flowers in her hair and carried magic secrets in her eyes. She spoke to noone. Sje spent hours on the riverbank. She smoked cigarettes and had midnight swims.

I was never addicted to one thing, i was addicted to filling a void within myself with things other than my own love

Womanhood is about wearing a big coat and saying fuck this

One day you will wake up refreshed, drink coffee and be able to read a book the same way you did

Thats how old souls are made. By how many sunsets theyve seen, hugs theyve given, hearts theyve healed, and people theyve loved. Juansen dizon

Patiently the night waits for the moon and loves whatever face she happems to show. Yeah, i love you kind of like that.

I hope you live louder. I hope you laugh more. I hope you sing at the top of your lungs. I hope you drive with the windows down and let the wind rustle through your hair. I hope you hug. I hope you kiss. I hope you surround yourself with people who make you feel alive.

30.11.24

U know what i want

I want a picture of my future husband

I want to know if my life worked out

If i found my movie like lovestory with someone better than my wildest dreams

I want to know if my funeral will have lots of people

Whether people who neber liked me will lie and say we were friends

I want to know if my parents will be proud of me

I want to know if ill travel to different countries, see black sand beaches and pink sand beaches

If ill let being self concious keep me from doing things

If ill make a difference in the world

If i mattered

If whether my grate grandchildren will be decent people

I want to know how i will die and at what stage.

If ill be happy with the way my life turned out

I want a picture of my life twenty years from now

How wrinkly my face will get

Really i wish someone could give a percentage of how much i did versus how much i let being self conscious stop me from things i should have been able to do. Not about stuff like climbing a mountain, but more like being a wacko or saying something to make someone laugh, to make someone feel included, to make someone feel good about themselves

I kind of want to talk about my relationship with gd. What trauma does do my relationship with gd and the ppl around me. That the biggest thing i can talk about

I also have a need for trees. For gan eden. To create a happy place for me and other people. To get a version of perfect, the perfect day, perfect weather, perfect look. Its a weird feeling- perfect. Im someone who can love sitting outside on a friday drinking coffee, but after ten minutes there im done. I can want to go to tge kotel or the beach and after like ten minutes ditting there, i want to leave cuz i dont know what to do with the feeling after the initial happiness settles.

My life is pulled between who i am in chicago and who i am here and being an adult but being a kid and being religious and being part of the whole world and being girly and being wild and the combination of a lot of things is me. Talking about torah but also talking about drugs. Im the product of loys of different cultures but i dont think i fit but with ppl who are also searching. My dad really connects to the 70s style and my mom connects to college in the 80s in new york and i was born in the late 70s.

I feel like like the pulling is from opposing stuff within me. Spiritual and material, life and death.

[shionuzukis]

prior to playing fe4, i didn’t understand some judgral fans’ defense of the giant maps. it’s intensely overwhelming at first, but i’ve been converted into a diehard defender. the huge maps are such an intrinsic part of fe4′s mood and sense of progression. i love the modern 3ds games, but spending an entire chapter seizing an entire nation? that the in-game chapter maps can be used to make a relatively approximate map of the entire continent? it renders the conflict in such international terms and so physically so. 

the ambition of fe4 really wows me.