#but i guess my brain is just regurgitating things for some mild entertainment 🥹

[ofmermaidstories]

i’ve been having the most unsettling dreams, lately, but i only really remember the tail end of them. the first in this trend involved me and two like, perfect copies of myself breaking into heaven—i slip in first and im surrounded by these tubes filled with babies, embryos, all at an array of stages and standing there with them is a little girl, like, idk, 12 or something. she’s completely unbothered by my being there; she’s much more interested in the babies, flitting from tube to tube, smearing the glass. i ask her what she’s doing—and she looks at me oddly. “i’m picking my baby,” she says, like i’m a dumbass. i frown at her because she’s barely an infant herself, why does she need to pick a baby—

and then i know. and i wake up.

the other night i dream im in the dark parking lot of a an abandoned shopping centre. the sky is falling and there’s this mass of rubbish and trolleys and junk all piled up in a mound and when i approach a boy appears. he’s been waiting. “i can’t help you,” he says, trying his hardest to be brave. he has big dark eyes and they are shiny with unshed tears and i’m concerned because he is a child and i should be helping him—

and then i wake up again and the birds outside are noisy.

last night, i dreamt that im making a detour to pick up some soil. i wanna plant some herbs, pot a fern, idk, just do stuff so i get to this sale yard that’s way out of the way and get out of the car and make friendly small talk with the men that are working there. one of them grabs me a bag of soil, then a second, and then a plant; he and another man load them into the car and i drift over to a pile of dirt—more soil—and one of the guys is asking me if that’s all i need but i don’t listen to him and i start digging down into the dirt until i find it; the small sleeve of a brightly coloured sweater. i look up, and every man in that yard has stopped, and is staring at me.

(i wake up, and my first groggy thought is fuck, i never got her out of there. but i don’t think i got out of there either, so maybe it evens out.)