#but i don't find the whirlwind magic honeymoon ''ur partner is All You Need'' approach to be that romantic anyways as in like

[unproduciblesmackdown]

kinda a funny shtick of mine that i’m aro and have such strong takes about Romance(tm) but also like, it’s also kind of a funny shtick that the stuff that i’m always most inherently opposed to tends to be like, the most truly (tm) of ~romantic~ concepts aka the Magical-y stuff and whatnot so it’s like i’m coldhearted for being like “uhh i hate that” and yet imo like, the way i prefer to think of things strikes me as the warmer perspective on it

for example whenever it’s the ol “romance is isolating!” which like, usually goes along with “romance means caring less about other ppl who aren’t your partner b/c you don’t need them anymore!” like. well usually it feels like the bass-boosted DIE FOR EACH OTHER vine lmao but also like. yeah where it’s like “okay now that we have each other we don’t need anything else from Life, let’s shut ourselves away and be happy about that, if it’s in a mausoleum that’s fine b/c why would i care about anything besides Being Together” or how like, wow being with you is so great that i don’t need to think about my dumbass friends anymore like.........here i come in with my “zero / fun!” knuckle tats to be like “what if loving someone didn’t need to be defined by if you love everyone else Less” and “what if loving someone wasn’t measured by how fine you’d be with isolating yourself and still being happy b/c they’re with you? that’s very convenient for capitalism btw and its Nuclear Family Unit Is All You Need agenda” b/c [that post abt the guy throwing down the capitalismo card]

and in general i just don’t think there’s any “good” isolating forces in any kind of relationship. and that means me stomping on the magical glowing embers of a lot of magical romance concepts but, like i said, i don’t find those kinds of ideas Warm and Idealistic and Romantic in the first place

that “romance = not isolating maybe? let’s consider that??” actually covers a lot of grievances i have lol but furthermore maybe it’s shocking to hear that i don’t go for much of anything that leans too far into the It’s Magical direction like that love transcends the Everyday and us being human like. actually i strongly take the perspective that love is a super ordinary and deeply human experience and like, isn’t that a Nicer idea than that Feeling Love is us glitching out of how we usually are.........like love doesn’t Have to upend your wholeass existence Constantly And Forever and that’s not lesser than if it does for someone else ig.......it doesn’t have to transform every aspect of life into wonderment.........quality time with a significant figure doesn’t need to be like, the most spectacular unspeakably beautiful stuff only and always......not that getting Swept Up In E-Mo-Tion or doing activities with your partner which are Not everyday and which are fairly special / spectacular or finding a relationship to be somewhat dramatic / transformative etc etc whatever is bad just that like. it doesn’t have to be Constant and it’s not going to be and that doesn’t mean that real life is just failing to live up to the Ideal or something......more that sharing the Ordinary Stuff isn’t at all inferior or whatevs

anyways i went off and started talking and lost track of whatever i’m saying here so first of all I Hate The Idea Of Romance Being Isolating and I Prefer To Think Of Romance As Ordinary Rather Than Transcendent and are these not the more “romantic” perspectives honestly and it’s all in line with my would-be “i hate fun” qualities like when i don’t like when something’s trying too hard to be funny-cute all the time or something. hard to describe but i know it when i see it. Anyways it is my demand for things that are Genuine which leads me to respond to stuff with bitterness and opinionated-rant-time and the like. though also i’m like that basically all the time, so plenty of other things lead me to that response too. oh wait no yeah and when things like, are trying to Evoke being Genuine but it’s obviously this non-genuine performance of it and trying too hard and i Know It When I See It and it annoys me sm like don’t insult me. get away with that stuff. pandering to the cute & quirky angle like you know what. i hate this. weirdly enough i don’t find stuff that makes its brand to be like, never being “negative” or “bitter” to Seem Genuine in the first place, so, obviously.........i will Not stop being opinionated as hell about everything, it is just part of my charm at this point. or at least a characteristic of mine that i don’t feel the need to sand down because it’s like, not every difficult trait is a flaw!!! i’m already restricted enough by Being Accommodating And Convenient As Possible for everyone and over-self-critiquing any ~difficult~ or uh-oh Imperfect traits. it’s fine.........anyways and tldr what is romantic about someone’s presence in your life like, diminishing everything else that isn’t Them?? why shouldn’t it be expansive and open someone’s life and their capacity to love rather than narrow the focus of it??? catch my rants about “i hate this trope in fiction or attitude in real life towards Romance” airing basically every day in my head, b/c honestly tf is this