#but i always feel so bad- like im wasting money on luxuries when i should be using to on therapy and shit to help me become more productive

[mintyvoid]

hh i wanna play a video game, but only in one specific spot in my home. not at my computer, where all the games i wanna play are.

yes, im at my computer anyways- staring at my steam library- STARING at the games i wanna play.

can't open them tho, won't play them.

as soon as I leave my computer, back to the comfy spot. I know, I KNOW, I'll finally feel 'time to game' but will then be too tired physically and mentally to get back up and move spots.

but im going to move back to the spot, because I have been doing nothing for hours now- just staring at my screen NOT DOING WHAT I WANT TO DO.

[thenamesseven]

Word count: 3.2k

Warnings: Some swearing! And Jaebum being a jealous bean.

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To say you were panicking was a complete misunderstandment.

With your heart pounding against your chest and your voice stuck in your throat, it turned almost impossible to stop Jaebum from leaning closer and closer, in fact, you just accepted your fate when the distance between the two of you turned non-existent and your lips met. You swore your heart stopped beating right there and then, somehow you were still alive when his lips moved gently and slowly against yours but your heart had stopped moving for certain. You felt how heat crawled up your neck, turning your skin red in the process, you probably looked like a panicking tomato right now. 

Jaebum on the other hand had his eyes closed, one of his hands gently resting on your left cheek as his thumb traced random patterns on your skin. He could sense how your face was starting to get hotter and hotter and even though he knew that he should probably back up and apologize for being so straightforward, he just couldn’t move away from you. By the way you stood there, frozen and tense, he could only guess that you were too shocked by his actions, Jaebum couldn’t blame you though. Who wouldn’t be after being kissed by a complete stranger?

You snapped out of your trance when Jaebum slowly guided you back, making your body meet the wall. His hands had abandoned your cheeks and were currently moving down your body, fingertips feather-like touching you, sending not so innocent shivers down your spine. Jaebum tilted his head, feeling brave enough to deepen the kiss even more but he knew he had fucked up as soon as he felt your little hands on his chest, using some of your strength to force your kiss to come to an end.

“What’s wrong?” He asked almost in a whisper, not moving away completely. His lips were still too close, near enough for his warm breath to caress your skin. Jaebum’s eyes opened and instantly scanned your red face, the smirk that appeared on his lips made you feel even more embarrassed and that, apparently, made the situation funnier for him “There’s no need to be shy, trust me”

His lips brushed against yours teasingly, arms pulling you into his chest without hesitation. Now he could surely feel how your heart had come back to life to hammer against your ribcage, being so close to him was definitely not good for your health.

“W-what are you doing?” You asked once again, hands back onto his chest as you used all of your strength to push him back. Jaebum didn’t budge, he simply looked down at you genuinely confused “Jaebum, get off me” This time, when you pushed him again, he finally took a step back and put some space between the two of you. 

“Fine, fine” He replied quietly, hands sliding into his pockets and eyes moving down to his shoes. Finally being summoned and saved by somebody had had him feeling so excited that he never stopped to think that you wouldn’t be okay with this. It didn’t make sense though, if you had recited the words to summon him then why were you freaking out now? “I’m sorry, I should have asked for permission”

“No offense but, first of all, you should have rang the doorbell” You told him, hands going to your hips as you rested most of your weight on one of your legs “How did you even come in?” Your second question was the one that was bothering you the most, you always made sure to lock the door and windows when you were at home at night alone and you would have surely heard him if he picked the lock then....How did he make his way inside without you noticing it?

“You called me, I didn’t need permission to come in, did I?” He asked, crossing his arms on his chest. Jaebum didn’t understand what you were talking about and that was starting to slightly frustrate him. “It’s like….If you gave your boyfriend a spare key!” His example made you frown, he noticed your dislike towards his comparison “What?”

“You’re not my boyfriend” You instantly replied, arching your eyebrows when he looked shocked.

“But we just kissed!” He exclaimed as if he could not believe what you were saying.

“You broke into my house, Jaebum!” You whisper shouted those words, afraid that Youngjae would manage to hear what the two of you were talking about and ended up calling the police or something similar “I didn’t even know you existed until I saw you there standing in the corridor! H-How are you...Why are you...Why are we even dating? When did we start dating?”

“We started tonight” He answered nonchalantly as if that would calm you down “Although the fact that you summoned me means that the spell or whatever you did to bring me back from Hell knew we were destined to be together”

That sentence made you lose it, everything that got out of his lips was pure nonsense and you were starting to believe that this was some kind of horrible prank Jinyoung had prepared for you as a revenge for that one time you sneaked into his house at 3 am and made him scream like a girl when you woke him up.

Frustrated, you started pinching the bridge of your nose, a headache would appear later for sure “Did Jinyoung send you?” You asked, just willing to be over with all this. Maybe he had somehow managed to find out about you and that blog where you found the spell to find a boyfriend, Jinyoung always worked hard on his pranks and definitely took them to the next level when it was about taking revenge but giving the spare key you gave him to a complete stranger was something else “Where’s the key he gave you?” 

“Who the fuck is Jinyoung!?” Jaebum raised his voice absolutely frustrated now, communication between the two of you was being a disaster, a total mess and he was starting to think that there might have been some kind of mistake and he had been summoned by the wrong person.

“Lower your voice Jaebum, we don’t need Youngjae rushing back downstairs being all worried again” You warned, scolding him as if he was a four year old.

“If he shows up again all worried for you I’ll punch him in the face” You would have thought he was just messing around with you if it wasn’t for the determined look in his eyes.

“Jaebum!” You exclaimed, almost whining since you were really frustrated with him.

“What!?” He exclaimed back, sounding as frustrated as you did.

“You’re not going to punch Youngjae!” He pouted at your words and if you had been in an entirely different situation he would have looked cute, right now, he simply looked as if he wanted to distract you from the conversation the two of you were having.

Jaebum knew this conversation was not going anywhere and despite his will to punch your neighbor, he knew you would probably calm down as soon as you got some explanations as to why he was there or how he had managed to find you. Although, he had the feeling you wouldn’t believe what he was about to tell you, he could just hope you wouldn’t kick him out.

After all, you were the only thing he had right now.

“Fine!” He finally agreed, hands going to his jeans pockets as if to show you he wouldn’t be using his knuckles any time soon. You relaxed at that, feeling calm for your own sake and Youngjae’s. You didn’t know what Jaebum wanted exactly but you were almost sure that if he had wanted to hurt you he would have already done it instead of wasting his time arguing with you “Want some explanations?” He asked, sounding a little hesitant but calmer too.

“Please” You answered, muscles not tense anymore, you weren’t even scared of his presence at this point.

“Okay, take a seat and I’ll explain everything”

Not willing to waste more of your time arguing with him, you decided to do as Jaebum told you. Sighing you walked past him and into your small living room, a smile coming up to your lips when you saw how clean and organized it was, you honestly were kind of glad that you had cleaned yesterday because if that hadn’t been the case, Jaebum would have walked straight into the mess your apartment was whenever you had exams. 

“Cozy” You heard him mutter as he followed you into the room. He had never been a huge fan of small apartments like yours, Jaebum was the type to spend money in luxurious houses with incredible views but for various reasons, the little living space you probably called home looked incredibly comfortable for him. Maybe it was because of the furniture or the warm colors you used to decorate the room, whatever it was, it pleased him.

“It’s not bad” You replied with a small shrug, plopping yourself down onto your couch and letting the worn out cushions swallow you.

“We need to buy a new couch” He instantly said when he sat down and felt how he started to drown slowly.

“Yeah, maybe we should also buy a Queen size bed since we’re apparently dating” You scoffed, obviously using as much sarcasm as you could but the way Jaebum’s eyes glinted told you he had took that sentence seriously “You’re not sleeping here” You deadpanned

“Why not?” Jaebum panicked, you could see it in his eyes and for some reason, you truly believed that he wasn’t lying to you “I don’t have anywhere else to go”

“I don’t even know where you came from Jaebum” You sighed exasperated, not wanting to argue again but kind of tired of this scenario. The entire situation didn’t make sense, anything that Jaebum said  didn’t make sense and yet, you hadn’t kicked him out of your home for some reason “Get on my shoes for a second” Looking at him, your eyes met and you saw how he had turned a bit more serious, confidence was slowly vanishing from his features “You show up out of nowhere in my apartment, want to punch my neighbor and after making out with me, you tell me we should buy a new couch because apparently, you want to live here too”

“I just came because you called me” He said tiredly, sliding his fingers through his own hair, messing it up a little “The spell, you must know what Im talking about, there is no way I got sent here by mistake (Y/N)”

“You’re talking about that stupid spell I found in that internet blog?” You asked with your eyes opened as wide as plates “But that-”

“It’s not that stupid” Jaebum cut you off, that spell was more important than you thought it was but he couldn’t talk about that now, not yet at least “I mean, I showed up after you said those words right?” 

“So what? You teletransported yourself here because I said those words? Where are you from?”

“Hell” 

That was the last straw and Jaebum saw it in your eyes. Maybe he shouldn’t have been that honest with you but wasn’t honesty the key to successful relationships?

“I’ll show you” He said seriously kind of desperate for you to believe him, clearing his throat. The way he rubbed the palm of his hands against his jeans told you he wasn’t as calm as he wanted to look, Jaebum was anxious and you didn’t know if that was a good sign or a bad one “Get closer”

“Jaebum if you kiss me out of nowhere again, I will be the one throwing hands” You warned, seeing how the corners of his lips slightly tilted upwards “Not joking” Jaebum laughed softly, shaking his head as you scooted closer to him while you sat straighter.

“I won’t kiss you again without permission” He said gently, reaching out to take your hand in his “Now look me in the eyes” The two of you turned a little, eyes staring into each other’s so intensely that you could see your own reflection on his dark irises “Concentrate on me and only on me, no matter what you see or hear remember that we are in your apartment and that you are safe, okay?” He asked, sounding truly serious about what he was going to do, you doubted something was going to happen but still nodded at his warning “Alright”

Jaebum proceeded to close his eyes allowing you to examine his features closely this time. He seemed delicate but manly at the same time, his skin was entirely perfect and the two little moles above one of his eyes made him a bit cuter than you initially thought he was. Some wrinkles appeared in his forehead when he started focusing even harder, his pink lips puckering and his sharp jaw getting tense.

A couple of minutes passed and nothing had happened but you still gave him the benefit of the doubt, in fact, you were sure that by the time you moved your hand away from his ten minutes had already gone by.

“That’s weird” Jaebum whispered looking down at his hands, his eyes avoiding yours “Why can’t I..-

“So? What was supposed to happen?” You asked curiously, he looked genuinely confused as if he had truly been expecting his trick to work. He was either nuts or a really good actor.

Jaebum opened his mouth to say something but closed it again when he thought about it. If you didn’t believe him when he told you he came from Hell, you wouldn’t believe him if he said he was going to show you some of it “You know what? Maybe it’s better if I just leave” 

That’s exactly what you’ve been wanting to hear all this time but unexpectedly, when Jaebum said those words sounding so disappointed and confused, your chest tightened. What kind of reaction was that? He was a complete stranger that had shown up out of nowhere, Jaebum had intruded in your apartment and acted as if he had lived with you this entire time, any normal person would have called the cops to get him behind bars.

Then why haven’t you? Why did you feel worried now that he said he was leaving?

“Where do you live?” You asked quietly, resting your hands on your lap, not sure of what to do.

Jaebum scoffed as he stood up, fixing his jacket “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you” He muttered in such a small voice that you barely managed to hear him, he seemed truly upset and that only made you feel worse. “I shouldn’t have been this direct” He mumbled, more to himself than for you to hear “Guess I’ll see you around?” He asked, turning his head to look back at you with a small smile on his lips.

Then you realized you didn’t want him to go, you wanted him to stay even though it was crazy. How could you let a complete stranger into your apartment, into your life like that was an absolute mystery but again, the thought that if he had wanted to hurt you he would have done it already popped into your mind.

“Stay” Your lips acted before your mind could convince them to stay closed, a sigh accompanying those words as you stood up too “If you really don’t have anywhere to go then stay here” You finally said, heart fluttering a little when you noticed how his entire face lit up at your invitation.

“For real?” He asked, his whole body facing you. The sadness that had been there a few seconds ago had been replaced by pure happiness “I can live with you?” 

“Just until we find you a place or something but yeah, I guess we can be roommates from now on” You shrugged, not really believing what you were agreeing to. Maybe you simply were as crazy as him.

“Thank you so much (Y/N)” He went to hug you but you placed your hands on his chest, keeping him away from your body successfully. Jaebum smiled a little, not forcing you even though he could have easily outdo your strength and touched you “Okay, hands to myself” He said obediently, smile small even though it was obvious he was holding himself back from giggling.

“Good” You smiled back at him, fingers twitching from holding yourself back since you felt like patting his head “Now if you excuse me, I’m going to head to bed, today has been a really long day and I’m exhausted” 

Jaebum nodded at your words and before he could say something else, you started walking back to your room. Before getting in bed you would get some blankets and another pillow for him so he would sleep comfortably on the couch, that’s why, when you noticed he was following you down the hall you didn’t say anything.

Assuming he would just stand outside, you opened your wardrobe without paying too much attention to him and when you grabbed some of the spare blankets and pillows you saved there for the rare occasions your friends stayed over, you turned around to hand them to him. 

Everything fell from your hands when you saw him shirtless and in the process of taking his pants off besides your bed.

“What the fuck Jaebum?” You asked frowning, heat rising to your face again as it turned as red as a strawberry “Get dressed!” Youngjae had heard that shriek for sure, oh God, you weren’t sure how you would face him after everything that has happened in the last few hours.

Jaebum froze like a kid that has been caught doing something they shouldn’t and looked up at you with a mix of confusion and guilt in his eyes “It is uncomfortable to sleep in these jeans” He muttered with a small pout not pulling them back up but not taking them off either, he just kept it at his knee high which made everything more awkward.

“You’re sleeping on the couch” You told him, in case he had understood he was sleeping in the bed with you.

“What?” He asked, even more confused now “I know you hate me a little bit but you surely don’t hate me enough to let me sleep on that” 

“It’s not that uncomfortable” You tried saying but even you, the owner of the couch, didn’t believe that.

“I’m not sleeping on that couch” He said determined, kicking his jeans off, the sound of his belt hitting your floor only making your cheeks turn redder. Before you could say something else, Jaebum picked his t-shirt from the floor and put it back on “I’ll keep this on since it makes you feel really uncomfortable but you know, I’ve always prefered a little skin on skin contact” You couldn’t say anything, you simply watched as he pulled the sheets back and slid himself into your comfortable and fluffy bed. 

You were already regretting your decision.

“Jaebum?” You asked, approaching your bed.

“Mhm?” He had his eyes closed, already zoning out and almost asleep.

“I won’t be sorry if I kick you out of bed” You stated sliding under the blankets next to him, body laying as far as it could. You decided to face the wall since you didn’t know if you would be able to get some rest with him being so close to you. “Try some funny business and I’ll break your hand” You threatened, closing your eyes as you heard him chuckling amused.

“Don’t worry kitten” He whispered quietly, turning the light off so the both of you would be consumed by darkness “You’ll be in my arms soon, there’s nothing you can do to avoid it”

Taglist: @gold--gucciempress​ @harringtonsblackgf​

[savysavannah]

Challenge 1

Special thanks to @damian-schreave and @hadleyjaneharper for the rps.

Also the last section is not in fic format because its 2am, im lazy, and you get the gyst from the RP. Apperantly this is too long so part 2 soon.

    The Prince was off in Paloma for a bit so we were of little use in the Palace, no idea why they had us move in so early. Therefore, I’d spent most of the day with some books I’d grabbed from the library. Primarily they were legal books since it never hurts to brush up. But every once in a while, such as now I’d need to go and grab some food. 

I brought my notepad and a book on contract law with me and walked into the kitchen. There was another girl also in the kitchen. We haven't spoken to each other, she didn’t seem unfriendly or particularly awful company, just hadn’t really had the moment to. I grabbed a plate of fruit and wondered if she would say anything. After a moment I sat down and resumed reading. 

Then a small sad sigh came from the young woman who was looking down at her phone with a sad face. It wouldn’t be too bad if I took a break for some conversation. However, the young woman looked troubled, she may not be in the mood. I yawned and stretched then mumbled, but loud enough for her to hear, “God, I could use a drink.” and wondered if the other would take the bait. 

There was a beat before the other spoke, “Long day?”

“More or less. Lots of reading, missing work. How about yourself?”

She shrugged “Its...different than what I’m used to. Lots of sitting still when I’m used to spending my days moving around.” SHe grimaces then sighed, “The adjustment period is always the toughest, though.”

I thought for a moment trying to remember the occupations of the selected, “The dancer?” I asked. 

She grinned “Yeah. Hadley.” She raised an eyebrow, “And you?”

“Lawyer.” I said and stood from the table, walked over to Hadley and held her hand out, “Savannah Mars, Labrador, three.”

She shook my hand, “Nice to meet you.” then thought for a moment, “You said you were missing work? Do you work at a law firm?”

“Kinda. I work for the Illean Civil Liberties Union in their legal division. It's a non-profit which focuses on civil rights and for me civil legal cases. Lgbt+ rights defense, domestic defense, that sort of thing.”

“Oh, that’s really cool.” She said, seeming actually interested in my work. “Are you missing the casework, or something else?”

“It's pretty hard for me to step back from my work. Since I'm kind of left worrying about my clients. A new guy took over my cases but I'm trying to still work in my own way by studying up on some legal sections I work in less frequently but still may come up. Such as contract law.” I explained not fully hearing her other question. 

She nodded, “I understand, sort of. I’m left worrying about how my ballet company is going to perform, with somebody else taking over the role in the Nutcracker that I’ve had the past few years.”

“Yeah the transition really is nerve wracking. Have you seen them perform though?” I asked hoping that could at least provide some solace. 

“I’ve seen pictures on Instagram, but no videos yet. We were just finishing up our performance of Cinderella when I left. Nutcracker rehearsal started a few days after, but it’s a show we do each year, so... “ She sighed “ It /should/ be fine.”

I nodded, “well if they assigned them the role try and have faith in their qualifications. That's what I'm keeping in mind for mine. They did go to law school so it's fine. They got the role so it’s fine.” I said partially for her and partially for me. 

She sighed a little hesitant, “Yeah, you’re probably right. Competition is just gonna be a bitch and a half when I’m sent back.” She chuckled wryly.  

“Well maybe you'll win and then you won't have too. Who’s gonna take a role away from the future queen of Illea.”

“That’s extremely unlikely to happen.” She then almost smirked “What about you? If you win, nobody’s going to tell you no in a courtroom.”

I laughed, “If I win I'll kill myself.” Then I realized how dark that sounded, though it didn’t seem to phase her.

“I hate to say that I feel the same way, but…” She shrugged and nodded, “I feel the same way” For a moment I was confused, why would she join if she felt the same way? Then it clicked, a dancer would be a five, lower class, need the money.

“You're a five right? Did you apply for the money? If you don't mind my asking that is. It would just make sense why you'd dislike to win.” 

“It…” She bit her lip, “Kind of? It’s a long story involving a deadbeat mom, a shitty health care system, two starving artists, and a kid with leukemia.” She said with an apologetic smile. Whatever she’d be apologizing for I can’t say. 

“Well shit man, I'm glad you got in then. Both for the money and for a break from that. I know this society fucking sucks and we've got a likely shit for brains hier, but if you ever need a lawyer I'm here to help. Hopefully, being a three now will provide some help for you too.” I said then caught myself making a mental note to not be so vulgar with my language. 

She gave me a small smile, “Thanks. Now I just have to figure out what I’m doing with the rest of my life, after throwing my career into dance, only to become a Three.” She laughed, “What about you? Why did you enter? It sounds like you had a pretty cushy gig going on.”

It wouldn’t be smart to tell the truth, but lying when Hadley had been so open felt wrong, I sighed and said, “My brother. Basically he forged my entry and I didn't want him to get into legal troubles for that. He's a fucking idiot.” I sighed and let that last cuss word slide as he is a fucking idiot. 

She snorted, “Men really do only have two brain cells.” She gave a small smile, “I’m sorry that you ended up in that situation, though. That’s rough.”

“Yeah. I tried to beat him up but my other brothers stopped me. It was really a mess. Had to find out from a waitress asking for a photo with me.” 

She shook her head, “My best friend told me that he was so upset to see me, “throwing my life away,” as if I hadn’t entered to help him and his brother.” Sounds like an ungrateful ass. She sighed and looked down at her fruit, “When did life get this messed up?”

A question with too big of an answer. A bit panicked and not knowing what to say I took a strawberry off my plate and held it out to her, “Fruit?” 

She chuckled and took the strawberry, “Thanks.” She takes a bit, chews, and then pauses, looking at Savannah, “You know what I could really go for right now, though? A good gin and tonic.”

“God that'd be great. You know what, let's make some. One glass can't hurt.”

She shrugged, “Sure, sounds fun. I’m down.” She looks around, “I know they keep the wine in that cabinet, but I haven’t found the liquor yet.”

After gathering our ingredients we get to work making the glasses, “so, what's your plan in all this?”

“In the selection?” She raises an eyebrow and then shrugs, she starts pouring things into the mixer bottle, “Stay here for as long as I can so I keep making stimulus checks, and then get sent home before I’m stuck spending the rest of my life here.” She finishes pouring and looks at Savannah, “You?”

I sighed, “about the same. Give the money to the non-profit I work for. I was hoping I could root for you to win, you seem like you have a good head on your shoulders to influence him, but the more I think about it the more I realize that's like damning to hell.

She snorts, “Well, I still appreciate the compliment, and I would’ve said the same about you.” Then she sighs, “I’ve always known that it’s been like this, though. He gets to squander every penny he has on luxury shit, whereas my paychecks…” another sigh, “But life isn’t fair.”

“Yeah. And then waste the money on useless shit and trying to pass dumb laws like making 'cats' illegal instead of actually fixing the problems in this country.” I said and poured myself a glass of the drink.

She poured some for herself and then shook her head with an eye roll, “Don’t even get me started on that debacle. Why even joke about things like that?”

“Because he doesn't comprehend how the people of his own country are suffering. He's just so blind with privilege. Not that I have much to speak on but at least I freaking try to think about others in the country and their situations.”

She gave me a small smile, “You didn’t seem like the type to blow your money on worthless things to me, at all. I don’t even know what I’m going to say to him when we have that interview in a few days.”

“Yeah I think im just gonna be polite for the sake of not causing a scene that'll haunt me my whole life” I said and took a sip, then clarified, “polite though, not kind.”

She nodded then drank too, “I really went from putting on one type of show for Twos to another.” 

“Any idea what you're gonna do as a three?” I asked.

She pursed her lips and shook her head, “I haven’t taken a science or maths class since I was eleven, and I don’t have the money for university. I guess I could work as a translator, or if that doesn’t work out, marry a five and go back to dancing.” She took another sip of her drink, “Hopefully I’ll be here long enough to figure it out.”

“Do they not have like threes who are dance teachers? I haven't really looked much into the area myself but it may make sense.”

She shook her head, “For me, at least, it was mostly Russian immigrants who were former dancers themselves, so Fives.”

I thought for a moment, “Well if you ever need history lessons, english, or legal aid I'm around. I dug into my pocket and pulled out a business card, since it’s not like either of us plan to be here long,  “Just all the way up in Labrador. Where are you from again?”

“Allens. So, not too far. Thanks.” She replied and looked at the card.

“Welcome.” I replied, finished off my drink then wrote down another idea. 

Hadley narrowed her eyes curiously, “What are you writing?”

“Just an idea for a proposition with the ICLU. There are probably other girls in a similar situation as you being lower caste now upper be it through marriage or selection, it may be helpful to talk about implementing a caste readjustment program.”

She lifted her head, smiling just a little, “That sounds like a great idea.” Then a little quieter she added,  “I'd appreciate it.” 

“Hopefully my boss will agree and pass it onto the innovation department. I'll write a quick memo about it to her later.” I smiled happy to have something to do.

“You really love your job, don't you?” She asked. 

I nodded, “It makes me feel like I have some kinda purpose. As cheesy as that is to say.” Making actual change in Illea instead of just prancing around doing whatever else I could have grown up to do. 

“No, I get that.” She looked down, “As a kid, I never really felt like I belonged, but on the stage, dancing?” She looked a little distant, “Standing out was a good thing.”

I nodded,  “Mhm. Have you thought of ways you could continue working while at the palace?”

She smiled, “Actually, I had a conversation with Prince Eaton about that, and I’ve been able to work out a schedule that allows me to still practice, even though I have to do a little more work to catch up on lessons.”

“That'll be good. If you wanted too you could put on a performance and donate the profits. That way you could be working towards a goal too instead of general practice.”

She tilted her head, “That's an interesting idea. I’ll keep that in mind.”

I nodded, “Well it was nice meeting you, Lady Hadley. But it is probably time for me to get back to work.” Then held out my hand to shake goodbye.

She took it, giving it a shake. “Nice to meet you too.”

It was pretty late in the afternoon by the time I was escorted to the interview room. Damian was in a navy blue suit jacket, dress pants, and a white button up shirt. He smiled at me as I got closer.  His eyes flicker to my nametag for a second before he speaks, “Hello, Lady Savannah. It’s a pleasure to meet you in person.”

I smiled trying to stay polite, then gave a small curtsy, “The same to you, your highness.”

He smiled back, taking a few steps back and gestured for me to go into the interview room. In the room is a sofa, surrounded by stage lights and a few cameras, what a romantic first meeting. There is one camera on a swivel stand, that is currently focused on Damian and I. He starts walking into the room, looking at me as he talks, "How have you found your first few days here, so far?"

I debated giving him a short one word answer of 'fine' but Danny's words of 'don't ruin your own happiness" slipped into my head. "They've been fine. I've enjoyed your library. It's helped me feel like I can in some ways continue working by catching up on legal matters normally outside of my areas of expertise."

He nodded while smiling then took a seat on the sofa, "So you're a lawyer, then? What kind of law do you practice?"

Reluctantly I sat next to him, hopefully I wouldn't catch an STD from proximity alone, "Yes, I practice primarily civil and criminal law with the Illean Civil Librities Union. So primarily defending people who are in bad situations due to outdated laws which need amending." My tone came out more passive aggressive than intended, but it was slightly justified as he should have been working to amend said laws and help people instead of partying.

"That's a great thing, to be doing. What got you into law?"

"Well I was at the University of Labrador. My best friend I'm the sorority I was in decided to go to a protest over women's rights in illea. We went, someone man came and antagonized some women, she defended herself verbally, got arrested, felt up by the officer, then was unable to do anything legally about it. I felt that was unfair so I decided to look into being a lawyer, liked the process, graduated in 2 years, went to Yale and here I am." 

He lets out a low whistle, looking down for a second. I couldn't help but be a but prideful at my accomplishment, then looks back up at me, more serious than before, his jaw tense, "I'm really sorry that happened to your friend." He said and fell silent. What a conversation killer. 

"It's fine." I said trying not to dwell on it, "How was your time in undergrad? Partied a lot, I saw." I said the passive agressiveness coming out again. 

He smiled, a little more relaxed than before, but not as relaxed as he was when he first entered the room, "I enjoyed my last few years of freedom before entering the real world, yes." He then raised his eyebrows, grinning a little wider, kind of teasing, "And what about you? Being in a sorority and all, I doubt you were much of a homebody yourself." 

I couldn't help but completely flush and bit down my urge to absolutely smack him upside the head. "It was a brief phase. It was fun. But also a waste of time." I chuckled a bit remembering my airheaded behavior in that year, "had I already been working harder I may have been able to finish faster and help more people."

He grinned a little at how flustered I was, which just made me want to punch him more, then smiled a little more genuinely towards the end, "We're still young. We have our whole lives to keep fixing things."

i frowned, "That isn't true. We never know when we're going to die. Something could always happen so we should be trying to help as much as we can. Not to mention while we" I paused after my slip of the tongue, but didn't correct it "partied in undergrad people were suffering who could have been helped."

There's a flicker of a frown on his face when I mentioned how short life is, but he lets it go, tilting his head when he looks at me, "We can't save everyone. That's impossible. We can try to do as much as we can, but there will always be more people in need of help.

"Partying isn't trying."

He raised his eyebrows, "You didn't even know you wanted to be a lawyer, back when you were partying in college."

I got kinda flustered again, he's right, there's no logically sound way to win. Yeah but I should have, I wish I had. Would have made the time a lot less regrettable." I said then cleared my throat, "Though, this is a bit of a heavy topic for our first meeting, don't you agree? Your- Damian." I barely corrected myself from saying Your Highness.

He chuckled, "A bit, but it's different from the surface level talk about work and provinces." He inclined his head, "Though, if you think about it, you never would have discovered your passion for law if you hadn't joined your sorority." He shrugged and gave a stupid grin which made me blush even more. 

Finally I snapped and turned to point a finger at him, "You won okay. I can't regret something if I didn't know to do something better, but that doesn't make topless jello shots any less of an embarrassing memory." I exclaimed then heard what I said and wished to curl into a ball and die. 

He chuckled a little, "We all have our moments. It's okay."

Suddenly, there was a knock at the door then, and a guard pokes his head in. Damian nods at him, then turns and looks at me, "Unfortunately, we'll have to exchange stories another time. It appears our time today is up."

I sighed in relief at my rescue, then mumbled under my breath, "Thank God." I stood to curtsy, "Your-" I cringed a bit at the error, "Damian."

He chuckled again, "It was a pleasure to meet you Savannah. Until next time." He smiled at me when we got to the door, and stopped in the doorway.

I smiled back politely, "Thank you for the conversation. Till next time." 

*savy was taking a break from her work and decided to out for a walk in the gardens. She had always been a fan of taking runs when stressed snd the gardens were providing a peaceful alternative. She was walking around when she thought she saw a bunny in the bushes. Being the gal she is she wanted to see it closer so she stepped off the path and walked into the gravel. Immediately her heel sank in the gravel. She lost her balance for a moment but didnt fall. Instead she panicked. She debated stepping out of her shoes to get it out but she didnt wanna hurt her skin on the gravel. Instead she tried to wiggle it loose and hopped no one was near*

*rip savannah, but Damian is out distressing by playing basketball at that point in time, and from where he's standing as he shoots this basket, he can see someone clearly struggling with something in the gardens. he can't see who it is, or what the problem is, but he figures he should go check it out. he tucks the basketball under one arm, jogging towards the person he can see, calling out* Hey, everything okay?

*savannah hears him call out an knows immediately it's the last person in the world she'd want to find her like this* Absolutely peachy! *calls back and debates ditching the shoes*

*he slows to a stop when he gets closer, his eyes going from savannah's face to her foot* Mmm, looks like you've got yourself in a bit of a sticky situation, there.

*is extremely flustered* no situation at all. I said I'm fine. *aggressively wiggles the heel and almost trips so she squeaks but manages to catch herself*

*when he sees her almost trip, he lunges forwards to catch her before she hits the ground, but then she catches herself, so he's like "oh was that for nothing?" he looks down at the shoe, furrowing his brows, thinking* Here, let me help with that, before you actually fall.

I'm not going to fall and I don't need your help. I'm perfectly capable of defeating some gravel on my own

*he takes a step back* Alright... if you insist... *hes not going anywhere, just watching her, waiting to see what she'll do*

*huffs when she doesnt hear him walk away and continues to wiggle then huffs when shes not getting anywhere* Fine. If you're just going to stand there anyways you may as well help.

*he chuckles, setting the basketball down on the ground, kneeling down to look at the gravel and the heel, before beginning to dig the heel out with his fingers* Not the best shoes to walk off the path in.

*rolls her eyes* I didn't think about that. I thought I saw a bunny and got distracted

*he can't help but raise his eyebrows at that, grinning, twisting the heel a little to unscrew it from the gravel* Was it at least a cute bunny?

*his tone is a little teasing*

It was cute, be careful with your tone though when your face is near my foot. *once its free she steps back on the path so she doesn't sink again*

*he chuckles, joking* What, are you planning on giving me a royal nose job with your shoe?

You could probably use one. *offers a hand to help him stand back up*

*he picks up his basketball, taking her hand, still grinning at her, teasing* Maybe it's just the angle you've been looking at it from.

*stands on her tiptoes looking at his nose* Nope. It's a little off. Nose job it is.

*she pinches his nose* its a big flaw. Doubt you'll be able to get a wife like that

*he chuckles* I don’t know, my nose has never gotten in my way before

*considers* You're right, I'm sure that was just your sense of responsibility that got in the way.

*he raises his eyebrows* You know, I’ve never turned in an assignment late, or anything for work late. Never asked for an extension.

I somehow find that doubtful. Your reputation of being a loose partier precedds that of a responsible duitiful person.

Well, it’s the truth. *he shrugs* If you’re really curious, you could email my professors. It’s all about finding a balance. *he smiles*

*grumbles because he seems to be honest about it* What did you even study?

I dual majored in political science and marketing. You?

*sighs in relief* at least you werent a buisness major. Political Science and History for me on a prelaw track.

*he nods, smiling, genuinely curious* Did you prefer one over the other?

Probably political science. I mean I love history it's why I added it. For fun since it's just like learning stories and seeing the modern day impact of said stories. But political science felt more efficient. Like it helped me have a better understanding of the philosophy of political thinking which has helped me a lot in law. Plus I just liked the professors more.

*he smiles* Understandable. Good professors make it so much easier to learn the content

*smiles* yeah and lots and lots of highlighters. Did you have a favorite topic in political science?

*grinning* I took a really cool course on comparative political economies - I really like the economic side of things. That, and the classes I had to take on international politics. *he looks over at savannah* What about you?

Probably civil politics. I've always been a fan of civil work. I honestly thought about working for the AFEI instead of the ICLU but decided I wanted to do more personal legal work than policy legal work. But it's always been the work that has interested me more since it's important to bring up civil conflicts within the country and try to help as much as possible. But learning about where we came from in terms of The United States vs the civil policies of Illea was an interesting course for me, especially because of the overlap of History and Political Science.

*he nods as she talks, thinking that all over* I think work guided what classes I liked as well. Because beyond national politics, I also have to think about international politics, trade agreements, and maintaining Illéa’s position in the world.

*seems slightly surprised* so you actually liked your major? I assumed you just were kinda forced to pick it

I was kind of forced to, but I could still pick the classes that interested me more. *He shrugs* Plus I really enjoyed my marketing major.

*thinks for a moment* Can I ask you something and have an honest answer? No bullshit PR answer. I'm just trying to figure out if we can trust you to be our future king through this, at the very least.

Sure *he nods, pursing his lips a little* Ask away.

Do you actually want to be the king of this country? Like aside from the perks you have from it, do you care about the work?

I do care. *he pauses, swallowing* I really do. It’s just...it’s a lot of pressure to accept from a young age.

*she thinks for a moment* Noted. Thank you for your honesty. *Looks at the basketball* Do you play much?

*he smiles kind of sadly* Not as much as I used to. I’ve gotten a little busy helping to run the country, and such.

*gets an idea* Do you wanna make a bet with me?

*he grins* Depends on what it is

Basketball. I'm working on a program right now with the ICLU, a coworker wants to come visit me and discuss about it but appreantly work visits aren't allowed during this. If I can get more hoops in you'll arrange that?

*he furrows his brows* Better yet, I could just organize for your coworker to visit under the guise of another event going on. Just give me a few weeks to work out the details.

*kinda chuckles because shes competitive* oh? Youre scared you'll lose? But if that's what you prefer

*he laughs* No, I just know I’d win, and I’d hate to deny you the ability to see your coworker

Fine. You'll set up the meeting, then I'll just prove to you that I would win had their beem stakes.

*he narrows his eyes at her, extending a hand to shake, still grinning* Deal

*shakes it firmly then kicks off her heels planning to walk to the court barefoot.* Would be an unfair advantage for me to still be in them

*he raises his eyebrows* Why, they helped square up the height difference between us, at the very least *he chuckles*

*almost elbows him over that but barely stops herself* I don't need that help. I'm perfectly capable of crushing you independent of my shoes

*he laughs* I played basketball in uni, you know?

As did I. Well- not in a club. A guy who I was *ponders for a moment* acquainted with, played it therefore I played with him and his friends fairly often

*he raises his eyebrows* And how tall was your acquaintance? Because I’m used to playing with people my height, but also my mom and sister, who are - *he puts his hand somewhere around his shoulder because they’re 5’4” and 5’5”* - about this tall

He was around 6'3. His friends the same or more. Don't worry I'm well aware of the disadvantage of my height and very prepared to utilize it

*he chuckles* Oh, I’ve got to see this. *when they get to the court he starts dribbling the ball casually, walking towards the middle of the court* Do you want to start with the ball, or should I?

*thinks for a moment and puts her shoes down on the edge of the court and rolls up the bottoms of her dress pants a bit* You can start with it.

*he raises his eyebrows at her rolling up her dress pants, but he nods* Okay, if you insist. *he waits until he’s ready before starting the play*

*she walks up prepared to steal since she cant block*

*he starts dribbling more seriously, quickly maneuvering around her, taking three large steps with the ball, and then shoots a basket, and it goes in*

*she kinda huffs about that dislikes. But once he has the ball again she tries again, this time getting it and doing her UNDER THE LEGS MOVE AND SHOOTS*

*he turns around, a little in shock* That is not a legal move!

Hmmm *puts her finger to her chin very smug* I dont think it explicitly says in the rules that you're not allowed too. You use your height I'll use mine *VERY SMUG*

*he narrows his eyes* Fine, best 2 out of 3? Whoever gets this next shot wins, then

*SHES BEING COCKY NOW* Aw is the wittle princey calling it quits so soon? His fragile ego damaged? *bats her eyes teasingly*

*he narrows his eyes* Fine, best three out of five, then. *he starts dribbling the ball right from here he is, and it’s a long shot to his basket from there, but he’s pretty confident, so he goes for it, and somehow it actually goes in. he raises his eyebrows at her* Still think you’re gonna win?

*crosses her arms* That was luck. *goes to get the ball since shes closer*

Or just sheer skill. *he smirks a little*

*turns to face him just to roll her eyes and gets the ball. She then dribbles it back to the middle or something idk how basketball works*

*he follows her to the middle, standing in front of her, knees bent in that “ready” position idk wtf it’s called lmao*

*that position makes knees wide so she dribbles and goes to do her fast under the leg move again*

*he sees it coming this time, and takes a few steps back, keeps his arm in front of him to reach for the ball, which he gets, and then dribbles across to the the hoop he has to score in, taking the shot, and watching it go in again. he grabs the ball as it bounces back up, raising his brows at savannah* One more, or are you good? *he grins a little*

*huffs again and crosses her arm* Fine we'll call it at 3 to 1. But in my defense it's been awhile.

*he grins* Well, you’re always welcome to practice out here with me, if you want.

I can't tell if you're being taunting or not *rolls her eyes and walks up to him then holds out her hand to shake for the end of the game*

*he takes her hand and shakes, then gives her a genuine smile* No taunting. I mean it. I’d love to have someone new to play with.

I'll consider it then. I am getting slightly bored of your homes running path for exercise.

*smiles back even tho she doesnt wanna because it was a nice offer*

*he tilts his head from side to side* Yeah, the running trail through the gardens is kind of short. There are better ones /in/ Angeles, if you ever want to check them out

Not sure I'm allowed to just waltz on out of here, but I'd love the names of any you know. My grandmother lives near her so I'm sure I'll be visiting soon enough after this if not immediately so.

*he shrugs* I could also drive you sometime, if you want. I /do/ have a car.

*seems a bit surprised* You know how to drive?

*he furrows his brows* Of course! I got my license as soon as I was legally allowed to.

But its not like you need too? Don't you have like drivers?

*he looks a little confused and taken aback* I’m sure some exist, but why would I want someone else to drive me when I could be free and drive myself?

I'm not sure. I just know rich people, like for example my cousin *mumbles for a moment to find the phrasing* So my grandmother is in charge of the Mars Candy Corporation. My mom's older brother Nathaniel will be taking over it, his kids also my cousins all have drivers. They're like twenty something now but Jackson is always bragging about how he doesn't have to take the effort to drive himself places. I just assumed other people who could afford them would have them, especially busy people who could work instead of drive.

*he blinks* Wow, I never even would have considered that. *he shakes his head* No, I like driving. Being able to roll the windows down and blast the music...it’s like a few moments of freedom. *he shrugs, smiling a little sadly*

*she noticed the smile then something clicks* so freedom is your vice. You act out to feel free, thus the partying. You mentioned earlier the responsibility of being a prince being am influence on the partying. A lack of freedom makes sense. *she knows shes getting too personal but her curiosity and worry for the future gets the best of her* But what does that mean you're going to do when you're king? You'll have even less. How do you plan to maintain that restriction without bursting and needing freedom?

*he stiffens a little at her analysis because damn it’s spot on, but sighs towards the end* Getting as much out of life as I can now. I always knew what my future held for me. So I can plan accordingly. *he forces a small grin, trying to joke* Besides, with any luck, I’ll be old and almost out of energy by the time I’m king.

*furrows her eyebrows concerned* That doesn't work. *sighs* Believe me I'd know. But we aren't wired to run off memories. Instead we develop habits and coping mechanisms. Everyone snaps from time to time, you'll go back to what made you happy last. For you I assume that'll be partying. Which is something you can't do as king, and assuming it wont be till your old isn't right either, regardless of if that was a joke it's not something that you can lean on since millions of people could be relying on you and you'd be unprepared. You are going to be king, You are not going to have freedom, you are going to be under immense pressure and responsibility, honest answer, what are you going to do when you need to snap?

*he narrows his eyes at her, this time more out of irritation than anything else, and he’s a little sarcastic* Gee, thanks for the reminder. Though, for the record, I /haven’t/ partied since uni, and I have no plans to in the near future. So perhaps I’ll rely on my other coping mechanism, such as basketball, or taking a drive.

Yeah well it's the truth and uni wasn't that long ago. It's hard to break habits. I mean I partied like 4 times a month in undergrad and I still use it. That was forever ago but that's not how humans work. You're gonna lean on what you've leaned on. You're going to get shitfaced, you're going to want what you used to have, you're gonna idolize those times in uni and want them back. But you're not going to have it and it's going to be hard and shitty but you have to tough it out because of the country that relies on you and this is proving to me that you're not going to be a reliable King for the people who need you.  

[mirajcnks]

ah hello everyone !!! i’m jules and wowow  i am so excite 2 meet u all and interact w all of ur dope charas :’) this is my Messy intro where im gonn a scream abt mira!! ok thank u for reading if u got this far jsdjfh

[ & ; * - cindy kimberly / pansexual / she/her ] isn’t it weird how close { amira 'mira' jenkins } resembles {cindy kimberly }? damn, i heard they are a { twenty } year old { undergraduate } and a member of { delta psi delta } studying { nursing }. outside of class { mira } participates in { soccer, photography & art} and their party anthem is { good as hell } by { lizzo }. 

amira was born on January 1, 1999 in Kona, Hawaii. she is actually the first baby born in the new year in Hawaii. her parents, dane and stella jenkins, were high school sweethearts & only 20-year-olds at the time of the birth of their daughter. 

her younger years were great, her parents spoiled her by taking her on trips and buying her whatever she would want. they treated her like a princess and soon anought she sorta turned into one.

but unfortunately when mira was 10 years old, her parents had filed for divorce and were currently fighting over who would she would live with. ultimately, amira’s father got custody of her during the week and she would visit her mother on weekends. 

dane jenkins, her father, is the co-owner of jenkin bros industries, which is a construction company. dane & his brother inherited it from their father and now run the business together. after the divorce, dane turned into quite the workaholic but still made time for his daughter

stella jenkins was a college student at the time, in which she decided she would drop out of school to become a full-time mother. during her time with dane she remained a stay at home mother but once they got divorced she started taking to online classes to finish getting her degree in social work.

she prefers to go by ‘mira’ instead of amira & will def give you the evil eye and a lil attitude if you call her by that. amira only allows close friends & family to call her that!

amira is daddy’s little girl & she wouldn’t have it any other way. her father treats her with everything she wants & give her all the money she wants to make up for not being home as much as he should. obvi one she will stop taking advantage of it but she is going to enjoy it while it last.

amira’s relationship didn’t really get much better after the divorce. sometimes she wouldn’t even go to her mom’s house on the weekend bc she was “busy.” eventually amira found out the truth, her mother had cheated on her father and was seeing some other guy instead of hanging out with her. what made it worse was she found out that he had a son, it made her feel as if her own mother would rather spend time with her son. amira never let her mother know that and still holds it against her till this day.

growing up with a decent amount of money had it pros and cons on mira as she grew up. she has grown to have a very luxurious taste. always has to the best of everything lol

ever since amira was younger she was always very bubbly and outgoing. she was actually vry into school bc she would get to see her friends.

she wasn’t a bad student, getting some A’s but mostly B’s but she really didn’t mind. she knew she couldn’t be the best at everything but at least she tried her hardest.

when amira started high school, her grades did improve but she herself got wilder. she was the biggest partier & pothead in the high school she attended. but no matter how wild she was, she kept up her grades & eventually made it to the honor roll.

also during high school, amira got really into creating art, whether it be painting, drawing or taking photographs. she also joined the soccer team to keep her busy but mostly to look good on her college application lmao

in her senior year of high school, amira decided to take a risk and apply to college she dreamed of going to, yale, doubting they would every accept her. but quite to her surprise, she was issued a half a scholarship at yale. she also turned out to be the valedictorian of her graduating class.

it broke her heart to leave her family. mostly her dad, in Hawaii but she wanted to pursue her dreams and she knew that they have her back no matter what happens

in her freshman year amira didn’t know what she wanted to do until she took some biology & anatomy classes & realized that she wanted to be in the medical field, ultimately deciding on nursing as her major

amira also continued to play soccer in her college career & joined the photography & art club to help her mind stay focused throughout the year. 

amira also rushed the delta psi delta sorority & decided to join when they offered it her. at the beginning she thought it would be a waste of time but she fell in love with her sisters & couldn’t imagine not being in the house with them.

ANyways i’m totally rambling rn so i shall stop her and move on to the next thing !!

PERSONALITY

she paints liKE ALOT !!; usually having something to do with the landscapes or people or flowers bc those are all her fav things. she does draw as well but prefers to paint. amira also has a passion for photography & often paints some of her own photographs

she’s vry protective of her friends and of herself

even though she is protective af she is very open to new people in her life! never wants ANYONE to feel left out when they around her.

she def puts up a front when sharing stuff about herself and her emotions unless she rlly trusts you

she likes to think she is badass as fuck but in reality, she is loser lmao!! ( laughs at her own joke)

speaking of jokes lbr, she pretty funny and sarcastic so she isn’t the only one laughing

however sweet she seems, she can also be very manipulative when she wants to be. knowing she can bat her eyelashes and get the world.!!

she tends to try to avoid most direct confrontation even though she’s really good in social situations and appealing to people uwu

always thinking, always learning, always caring

an actual flower

loves tattoos but only has like two!!

she looks at life in terms of opportunities and has lots of wishes and goals !!

she wants to live a vry luxurious life when older even though she is now. but she wants to be able to say she earned it herself

vry romantically compulsive which can be a problem lol!!

she constantly longs for partnership; whether it’s romantic or not

when it comes to money, she can be frivolous in her spending habits one day, and frugal the next

she is a problem-solver and will spend a lot of time helping others solve problems if needed

v good at talking and well-liked

while her spirit’s lively, it is also cunning & she often acts without thinking, throwing herself into things

loves to party obvs !!! tries to go out every single night bc why tf not lmaoo

honestly she is the life of the party. whenever the party is dying down or just getting started she is the first one on the dance floor. or she is walking around making people take shots with her

she is also very open about smoking pot and is def down to try other shit even though she hasnt been offered it yet

she doesn’t have a good sense of organization but she loves life and all it has to offer <3

but some cool ass plot i’d like to see is GIRL SQUAAAD, best friend, high school friends, exes, rommie, enemies, fwbs!! , party buddies or literally ANYTHING THAT SMELLS LIKE DRAMA and just anything bc i’m plot trash!!!

[hotcocosharing]

Second Chance Part 15 (IM RP)

Shunichiro Tachibana 

To say I’m shocked to find Midori lying next to me would be an understatement. Have I been so out of my mind to a point where I retain no memory of sleeping with her- is my initial first question but judging by how fully clothed we are, I sigh in relief before walking down the memory lane of the exact reason that brings me in this very spot. Sharing the same bed with my ex girlfriend who pushes me away then invites me to a launch party which I now realize we have both missed out.

Watching the innocent look on Midori’s quiet face as she drools (ever so little) on the covers and imagining her hilarious reaction about sleeping though the night with make up- how it ruins her perfect skin and how much money or spa she would need to undo the damage. The not so peaceful morning is quickly escalates by the sound of heavy rain outside that suddenly accompanies by the loud clack of thunder, causing the angelic face to wake in distress and confusion for a second follow by her real panicking realization to the fact that I am staring at her overnight makeup and morning look which consider to be all women (and maybe men) nightmare.

But what are we more afraid of? The storm outside or what’s up ahead?

After a rush breakfast buffet downstairs, I wait for Midori as she checks out and offers to drive her home under such crazy weather, “It’s the least I’d do to make it up to you.” It doesn’t take too much convincing for her to hop in the car, suspecting that she wants back at her sanctuary as soon as possible after such eventful yet boring night.

Midori remains quiet through out the ride and after the fail attempt to ease the funny tension with the radio which obviously has no reception under the state of rain so my lips part and ask something I never should. “What’s wrong?”

She shakes her head and replies with such calm that I am so frustratingly familiar with, “It’s nothing.”

And here we go, witnessing, experiencing history all over again, looping in the endless hell of nothingness while she is obviously upset about something!

[ It’s nothing. ]

Probably the most annoying sentence on earth, at least it manages to enlighten the fire in me every single damn time! The mystery of Midi’s departure till this day has never been satisfactorily explained, and I have good reason to resent this regrettably familiar statement.

A sudden loud pop follow by one of the tires flopping over and over again comes quickly after one another. I curse, figuring that it’s just my luck to be stuck in a car under the heavy rain with a heated conversation (storm) coming any minute now.

“Damn it!” Letting out another curse as I carefully pull over and hear Midori asks if I’ve got a flat tire. “Oh no, it’s nothing. We are just stuck!” A silence descends while more words pouring out in my chaotic mind- we are stuck again, stuck with each other, not going anywhere, neither going forward or backward is on the menu and I fucking hate being stuck. I’m a creative director, I don’t get stuck!

Midori stays quiet, there’s no sound except for the raindrops hitting the windows. “Enough!” I raise my voice with clenched fists on the wheel, “just go right ahead and say it! I have neither the time nor mood to play mind reading, we are way too old for this, don’t you think?”

She’s still quiet.

“What is it Midori? What did I do this time? I’m sorry I got sick and ruined your precious opportunity to attend the party! I’ve work to do too, a few hours of sleep was all I got, so yeah sorry I didn’t have the luxury to take better care of myself! Is that it, an apology? Is that what you want? Or because I was late? Or I forgot to reply a text? Or was it the fact that I chose the suite instead of your place? What the fuck was it, Midori? Or do you want to run out the door like last time without telling me a reason that I don’t ever deserve?!”

The weather forecast’s right, I am still under the curse of a gloomy weekend, just fucking great!

Midori Katayani 

It’s December 24th at a little after 10pm and he’s still nowhere to be seen. I’m in his apartment - standing in the kitchen, looking out the window to waste time which overlooks the city scape below and frames the hustle and bustle of the busy city near picturesquely and it hits me that I’m lonely. The helpless, naïve – completely out of my control feeling consumes me faster than the rain that’s starting to fall and I’m starting to wonder if he’ll even make it home for Christmas at all.

“Baby it’s business, but I promise… I’ll make it home.” “I know but so close to Christmas? I mean – it’s our first together and, and… I know I’m just being selfish but I don’t want you to go.”

That night had been the first of a tangent string of squabbling and bickering and fighting and whatever other name or term it could have been called but it was at that moment that I realized for the first time, for the very first time how much one person could mean to me. I figured I was allowed to be selfish – I was in love, or at least that’s what I thought the feeling was. Head over heels, take your breath away and make you smile crazy in love which I never assumed in my wildest dreams I’d actually be experiencing.

Had you asked me then – perhaps even now; the feeling was just too good to be true. As the rain kept on calling, harder and harder, a monotone storm brewing up ahead, the crashing sounds of thunder and lightning coaxed me, convinced me that I should go to bed.

But he’ll be here soon —.

Folding my arms across my chest in his oversized sweater that I’d sat in all day and which still lingered in his scent, another roar of thunder rumbled over head. Biting my lip worriedly, I was about to call it a night when the sound of keys jingling at the door grabbed my attention. He was here – he’d kept his promise. He was home.

—-

The sound of thunder vibrating  softly across the hotel suite windows was enough to wake me up. The last few years I’d turned into a light sleeper, something I didn’t really enjoy but none the less – my paranoia had risen after I had to get use to once again sleeping alone. Groaning as I rub my eyes and shift with a wiggle to get comfortable on the bed, it’s another clack of thunder that wakes me – completely and I push myself half up to sit in bed.

“Shu…Shun – Shunichiro?”

I can tell that I’m definitely not dreaming but a panic begins to run like electricity through my veins as the sight of my ex in a bed next to me – watching me…fuck. I know for a fact we didn’t do anything last night; I mean I wouldn’t be complaining if something had happened but I’m well aware that apart from a ridiculously failed attempt at a rekindled first kiss my luck ran dry rather quickly.

We’re both silent – it’s not quite an awkward silence yet not a comfortable one either. Things seem to stay this way between the not so delicate tip to around one another through to the breakfast buffet and then finally, the offer to be driven home. I snap the opportunity up quicker than one could ever say yes – my bags are thrown into the car quicker than imaginable and like I always use to; I slip quickly into the passenger seat.

A part of me wonders if Shun will need directions to find my place yet he hasn’t asked so I don’t bother with speaking up. The city looks different from the passengers seat; or at least in my eyes it does – I start noticing the little things I usually take for granted and miss out on when I’m driving myself or busy with my eyes glued to my phone in the back of the cab and in the midst of enjoying the serenity, Shun decides to stupidly, in my own opinion – ruin the silence by opening his mouth and asking my all time most hated question.

“What’s wrong?”

As a woman – I can tell you right now that even though I’ve got a million and one things which are racing around inside my head, my answer – just as anyone elses of this sex is always the same.

“It’s nothing”, I whisper, trying to regain focus on what’s happening outside and around the car. I know he hates the answer; even after all this years apart he’s clenching the steering wheel tight, the whites of his knuckles starting to show. I’m sure if I answered his question like that one more time just out of sheer utter frustration Shunichiro would explode. It’s more mumbling and grumbling and a bit of cursing as we pull over onto the side of a street and I ask the typical overly obvious female question as to whether there’s something wrong with the car and get a near typical male reaction back which doesn’t exactly help me in understanding what the hell is going on.

Silence – we’ve been reduced to sitting in silence with the radio cutting out and I can tell that Shun’s been stretched out thin to his last limits because he’s constantly putting a pressure on himself that he just doesn’t need. Something extra to just push himself over the edge. As the rain starts pouring harder and harder, I half contain a giggle at the fact the animosity between us has grown thick enough that it’d need to be carved through with a sword and whilst he’s never usually one to raise his voice – Mr near always cool, calm and collected bring to the surface everything it seems, that not just recently has been bothering him.

I try not to let his words have any affect one me yet it’s the last thing he says which causes a knee jerk reaction that coaxes me to snap.

[“Or do you want to run out the door like last time without telling me a reason that I don’t ever deserve?!”]

“You want a reason?”, oh shit Midi no… this is bad, bite your tongue, bite your tongue it won’t be worth it in the end. Of course – I wouldn’t be me if I had the ability to keep my mouth shut.

“Fine! I’ll give you a god damn reason – you never talk to me and you’re never there. Okay! It doesn’t matter if you fall sick because you know I’ll be there to take care of you. I don’t care about not going to the party last night because honestly, it was fucking nice just to spend a little time with you. I’ve never cared if you’ve been late or if you don’t text back because I know that’s just you and you’ll be there. I doesn’t matter to me that you picked the suite instead of my place because let’s be honest here if you were in my place and I in yours I’d have made the same decision to. I miss us talking. I miss how trusting we were and how honest we use to be. I miss staying up until early in the morning discussing things which could wait until another day but we didn’t want them to. It got to the point where we just stopped talking – I don’t know if we just got bored, if we were keeping secrets or if we were tired or perhaps we just didn’t need to but then whenever we did it always about work. That became like the biggest and only priority for you and then because of work, because of the job you were basically in a full time relationship with you stopped being there. You were hardly ever there. It just became a vicious cycle of work, talk about work, not there because of work, work, work, work, work, work and I get it – you like your job, but if you showed and expressed as much enthusiasm as you did about that with me we wouldn’t be having this fucking conversation.”

Sighing with a huff and unbuckling my seat belt to lean over and pull the button which popped open the car trunk where I knew the spare tyre would be, I gritted my teeth before getting out, instantly regretting having worn white on a day like today but at least the rain would conceal the tears I had swelling in the corners of my eyes.

“Give me fifteen fucking minutes and I’ll change the god damn tyre”, I snapped not bothered to continue with the argument that we were having, “..and then I want a response – none of this falling into silence because it’s an easy excuse.”

[fataziraphale]

Okay, but Ryouta and Impostor for the ask meme

YESSSSSSSSSS

(note for a wayward reader: I know I interact with a lot of DR kin communities on here but Im answering these solely as me writing about fictional characters and they way they’re portrayed in canon with some distance between me and them ok)

ryotageneral opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them * | actual love of my life * (maybe somewhere in between this one and the next one? love them.5? what a good character. I am such a fan. a very relatable man)hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang* (def not my type. I’m sure he would objectively look nice though if he wasn’t, you know, literally dying? like he’d be very handsome with such luxury beauty products as Ever Eating Or Sleeping In His Life)hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuffhe’s a hard worker and wants to help people, so definitely some hufflepuff tendencies in there, and there’s a LOT of slytherin in him: using the hope video, agreeing to junko’s sketchy ass offer so he can succeed in his ambition. but ultimately, the way he decides to help people is with his brain and his creativity. he doesn’t love people so much as an abstract idea of wanting to help people, and the most important thing to him isn’t them, but his anime. that’s ravenclaw.best quality: from a “I like this character trait when I see it in a character in a show I’m watching” perspective, he has SO MANY of the same mental issues as I do and I find it SO CATHARTIC TO SEE PORTRAYED and useful for coping like. obsession with saving others to the detriment of his own wellbeing, check. doing weird, manipulative things to try to save others even if it’s not really moral, check. intense guilt for something that wasn’t his fault, check. being really fucked up and traumatized after someone told him he should feel guilty for this thing, check. being stressed out and exhausted due to the amount of work he puts on himself, check. we are very similar. I appreciate it a lot. I love characters that are like me, because I’m ultimately obsessed with myself (as is ryota a lil bit). I also love that he’s shy and anxious and awkward but a lil bit of a dick anyway. like you think he doesn’t associate with people because of anxiety, but he honestly just doesn’t like people. it makes me smile. I really love ryota mitarai????worst quality: I have a hard time understanding how he could feel safe with Junko after she destroyed his DVDs. like, I get why he would be like “being sealed away in this sketchy ass place away from all people or sunlight? PERFECT” but… why would he just accept the offer of someone who destroyed his property, things that HE LOVED AND CARED ABOUT, in front of him? he seemed really scared of her, and then just… wasn’t? idk.ship them with: IMPOSTER!!! I also enjoy scenarios where people write imposter/ryota/ibuki stuff. I know some people include mikan in that, but I have a little trouble believing ryota would be totally okay with mikan after what she did to him? like even though she’s not brainwashed anymore, I’d imagine being around her would be kind of triggering for him, like it would take a lot of time for him to feel safe around her again… I also think I saw a fic once that was Ryota/Seiko where they were sharing stories of being emotionally abused and trying to cope together and that was nice.brotp them with: imposter and ibuki in scenarios where it isn’t romantic.needs to stay away from: I’m very uncomfortable when people ship him with Junko. I’ve also seen some Ryota/Naegi, and I don’t think that would be very healthy tbh… Ryota idolizes him so much that I don’t think it could be anything but a really unbalanced relationship, and as kind as he is, I’m not sure Naegi is ready to care for someone with mental issues as intense as Ryota’s.misc. thoughts: im love him? his character arc is definitely my favorite thing about DR3. I just feel like he’s very realistically written and relatable and likable and charming and ,,, I love that Imposter was given a friend I love that his healing is tied up with the idea that “fats and sugars” are good things I love introverted villains I just,,, love

impostergeneral opinion: fall in a hole and die | don’t like them | eh | they’re fine I guess | like them! | love them | actual love of my life (like yeah hes me but before I had this whole internet mod twogami persona for YEARS I was like…. my ideal boyfriend. perfect. the hottest man I have ever seen. I saw a man so beautiful I started crying)hotness level: get away from me | meh | neutral | theoretically hot but not my type | pretty hot | gorgeous! | 10/10 would bang(for reference, im ace and very sex repulsed when it comes to the idea of fucking men. but. yes.)hogwarts house: gryffindor | slytherin | ravenclaw | hufflepuffI appreciate when people sort him into Ravenclaw, and I see where they’re coming from – he’s the type of person who thinks before acting and likes things to be methodically planned. He fights bad situations with logic and organization. But when it comes down to it, Imposter is motivated by doing the right thing. He wants to save his classmates from death. He wants to save Ryota. It doesn’t matter that he has no personal ties to these people when he’s doing it; there is no doubt in his mind that saving them is the right thing to do. He has no trouble jumping rashly into a situation if he’s sure it’s the right thing, either; he pushes Nagito out of the way without a second thought. He’s such a heroic person,,,best quality: I know this stupid and shallow but I literally cannot get over the fact that he is canonically a feedee… I will never be over it. The fact that when Akane suggests there might be something wrong with his weight he is HORRIFIED by the prospect of weight loss and announces, “Do you know how much money I spent sculpting my physique?” like he canonically got this fat on purpose, he loves food with all of his soul, he believes “fats and sugars are the only thing you can believe in”… and then he’s still an incredibly interesting, complex character with a storyline that has nothing to do with that??? I can’t believe it???? I’ve never seen such good fat representation in my life, let alone a feedee being represented, I just ?????????????? the best thing ever???????worst quality: honestly I don’t,,, dislike anything about him rip. I do think the writers maybe shouldn’t have showed us his true appearance, at least not in such an anticlimactic moment? especially bc he never used that look again, like… if they were going to do it, I would think he would be himself on the boat, but he was just Togami again? it didn’t serve that much of a purpose in the story imo. if they were gonna do it, it should have been more intimate and emotional.ship them with: ryota and ibuki !!! either poly or seperately, I’m not fussed. imposter/hajime is also adorable, like I used to be really really into that ship even though I’m not so much anymorebrotp them with: same as above hahaneeds to stay away from: idk??? like imposter isn’t a very social person, but I don’t really think his relationship with any character is super unhealthy or anything. I just want him to be around people who give him love and support,,, the only thing I do note is that back in the day there was some discourse about the translation of some line Ibuki has in SDR2, about whether she’s saying he would make a good boyfriend or that he would make a good boyfriend despite his weight? I don’t see Ibuki as the kind of person who would prefer him slim, but he needs to stay away from anyone who thinks that way, period.misc. thoughts: the greatest best most beautiful character in the world,, also, me. but like… I love that he too has this obsession with saving people that manifests really differently, but is ultimately very similar to Ryota’s? I love that they have parallel arcs that intersect? I love that they support each other? I love that ultimately HE’S THE ONE WHO SAVES THE DAY in DR3? I love the twist of him being an imposter? I love the way he acts as Togami? I love the way he acts as himself? I love the way he’s so food positive always, I love the fact that he thinks everyone else is too thin and never struggles with his own weight, I just… wish he’d gotten more screentime in DR2 because the fact that they killed him immediately 1. made very sad 2. is frustrating bc of wasted potential 3. is kind of fatphobic bc they… killed their two fat characters in one fell swoop right away and then went on to write NO fat characters in dr3 or ndrv3 but… what can u do. im still love him

[themoneybuff-blog]

Questions About Weddings, Roth IRAs, Shoes, Blankets, and More!

Whats inside? Here are the questions answered in todays reader mailbag, boiled down to summaries of five or fewer words. Click on the number to jump straight down to the question. 1. Thoughts on caring for parents 2. Wedding question, part one 3. Wedding question, part two 4. Starbucks Visa 5. Books on home buying 6. Frugal running shoes 7. Roth IRA contribution question 8. Roth IRA or bigger e-fund? 9. Unwanted Christmas toys 10. Marketing crocheted baby blankets 11. Where do I get advice? 12. Further areas of philosophy Here in Iowa, it felt like winter did not begin until about January 12th or so, but when it did, it hit with a vengeance, with many inches of snow and a forecast for the coming week that has wind chills at our home approaching -50F. When the weather gets that cold, it interferes with all kinds of things. You simply avoid going outside if at all possible, which means that As I write this, Im bundled up in multiple layers of clothing with a cup of hot tea on my desk. I feel quite good after getting up quite early to shovel snow. I dont bother running the snowblower unless we have several inches, as shoveling our drive of a few inches of snow is good exercise. On with the questions. Q1: Thoughts on caring for parents My wife and I are in our forties. We have two adult children that are moved out and on their own. Her parents are both in their late seventies; my parents have been deceased since I was 20. Her parents are ailing. Theyre not in a situation where they need to be in a retirement home, but household tasks wear them out. They live about an hour away and we visit them two or three times a week to help out, as do my wifes siblings. We have been talking about the possibility of having her parents move in with us to make things easier on all involved. We are actually set up very well with this, as we have a large main floor bedroom that could be used by them and a main floor bathroom with a shower that could be modified a bit to make it easy for them to use. Our main worry is that the other siblings will simply stop helping or visiting in any way and just assume were taking care of it. They really like the regular visits from their children and grandchildren and we worry that will all dry up if they move in with us. Our secondary worry is financial as it will add some household expenses. What are your thoughts on this? Shaun In general, if everyone is on board with this, I think multigenerational living is a great approach for everyone involved. The key to making it work is communication people cant hold back on their feelings or else you will turn every little molehill into a mountain. You have to listen to each other and genuinely try to be supportive of one another to the best of your ability. If you can do that, itll work well. As for your specific concerns, with your primary worry, one way to handle this is to just simply have regular family dinners at your house. Make it a routine to have people over for dinner a couple of times a week. I dont know whether your home can support this, but it sounds like it can. Doing this gives people a reason to visit and see your in-laws rather than just stopping by. Its usually easier to go visit a parent or a grandparent if you have a reason to do so; if its just stopping by, its easy to skip it. If theres a meal involved, it feels more like a reason to visit. So, if the move happens, just institute some regular meals. Maybe have a regular Sunday evening potluck or something like that, and maybe start inviting a few people over on weeknights on a regular basis. For the extra meal effort, dont hesitate to ask people to come early to help prep if needed or to bring a side dish in fact, thats a good idea, because it invests them in the meal and makes the visit feel more purposeful. As for the financial concern, talk that over with your in-laws. They will probably want to feel some ownership over the situation anyway. You can simply ask them to pay the energy bill and the internet bill or something like that, something that will partially replace their utility costs at their old place and possibly cut your overall bills, too. They can contribute to buying food, too. This can end up being a money saver for you, actually. The key with any situation like this is open communication and candor. Everything wont go perfectly and youll all do things that drive the other one crazy. Just be open about it and dont let it grow into hurt feelings. Understand that everyone loves each other and you all want to make this work. Q2: Wedding question, part one I have two wedding-related questions for the Reader Mailbag. One of my best friends is getting married, and has asked me to be a bridesmaid. We are in our mid-to-late 20s. She and her fiance make good incomes and come from fairly well-off families. My friend and I have pretty different approaches to our finances as she really enjoys going out, eating out, shopping, etc. Meanwhile, Im currently in grad school. My friends wedding will be at a swanky venue in one of the most expensive cities in the U.S. (Note: its not a destination wedding, but I dont live there.) I expect everything about the wedding to be top-of-line. My friend wants all of her bridesmaids to purchase bridesmaids dresses together as a group from the same store, by the same deadline. The store stylist said that this guarantees that all of the dresses will come from the same dye lot. The dress that my friend chose for everyone to wear is $300. Its not that I dont have the money for this, but thats a lot of money! I found that same dress, used, in my size online. The used dress is significantly less money than the dresss retail price. I dont feel that dye lot matters much, but some online wedding forums warn against bridesmaids purchasing dresses piecemeal to avoid inconsistencies that may show up in the wedding photos. I would feel awkward asking my friend if I can order the dress on my own rather than as part of the group, because I feel like Id be ruining her expensive photos. Again, its not that I absolutely cant afford it, but it just seems so wasteful to spend hundreds of dollars on a dress when I can find it for so much less. Is this a time when I just need to suck it up and participate in the group order for the sake of maintaining social normalcy? I already feel bad because Im skipping the bachelorette party which is across the country, so I feel like Im the odd one out. Tammy If I were in your shoes, I would sit down and talk to your friend about the situation. Simply ask if it is okay for the bridesmaids to buy the dress on their own. If she asks why, simply explain the reason youre a graduate student, $300 is a lot of money, and you found the same dress in the same color for much less. The thing to remember is that if this causes a real issue, then there are issues in the friendship to begin with. A good friend appreciates the situation that their friend finds themselves in and works to find a way around it. A wedding is not made or broken on the dress worn by a bridesmaid. Just have a conversation. The vast majority of the time, this will be a non-issue. If it is an issue, its a valuable indication of the status of the friendship. Q3: Wedding question, part two Second, how much would you recommend spending for the wedding gift? I was thinking of something from the registry thats $100, but a lot of wedding etiquette sites say that if its a really good friend, you should be spending closer to $175. I dont want to seem cheap or send the message that I dont value her as a really good friend, especially when this is going to be a really nice/luxurious occasion. But theres also a shower gift to account for Tammy You should completely ignore wedding etiquette sites when they give an exact dollar amount for a gift, especially one as weirdly precise as $175. Thats just weird, bad advice. Give a thoughtful gift you can afford. Pick something from the registry that you can afford and then also write a nice handwritten note to go along with the gift expressing your best wishes for the couple in your own words with your best penmanship. Anyone who looks negatively upon a gift given to them is a person lacking in character. Gifts should always be given freely based upon what the giver can easily afford. Q4: Starbucks Visa As a Starbucks lover, is the Starbucks Visa worth it? How does it compare to popular cards like the Chase Freedom? Lana Well, lets walk through the hypothetical example given in their sales pitch. In that example, youre spending $525 a month for a year, $25 at Starbucks and $500 elsewhere, so that adds up to $6,300. Lets say you use the card for two years, so the total is $12,600. This earns you 64 rewards in the first year and 28 rewards the second year, totaling 92 rewards. A reward is a drink or food item at Starbucks and appears to be at least somewhat Starbucks choice. Lets assume these are worth an average of $4 each, so your total rewards are $368 in value. To get that reward, you also have to pay $100 in annual fees on the card. So, youre getting $268 in value, all in the form of Starbucks items that you largely cant select yourself. Thats a little over 2% in rewards in the form of food items that are probably good but you cant select yourself. Thats not really the best card deal out there, and its going to decline in value each additional year because you only get that big bonus the first year. I dont think this card is worth it unless you drink a lot of Starbucks, in which case you might want to rethink how much youre spending in coffee shops. Q5: Books on home buying Do you have any recommendations on books to read to learn about home-buying? My wife and I are planning to purchase this year. Jim My first recommendation for first-time homebuyers is Home Buying Kit for Dummies by Eric Tyson (seriously). Its an extremely good guide to what people should know about buying their first home, and Sarah and I read an earlier edition thoroughly when we were considering buying our current home. Ignore the for Dummies part its a really good guide. From there, Id hone in on which aspects of home buying arent crystal clear to you and read articles and find books to fill in gaps in your knowledge. If I had to pick a second book, Id probably look at 100 Questions Every First-Time Home Buyer Should Ask by Ilyce Glink. While its not as thorough as the Tyson book, it does delve nicely into specific areas of the home buying experience and can complement specific areas of the Tyson book well. Q6: Frugal running shoes For a new years resolution I followed your advice and started a resolution of running for 1 minute every day this year and running more if I feel like it but not required. Its been working great! I have been running about 20 minutes a day on average on warm days and at least running a block or two on the really cold days. I thankfully have a spot to run on snowy days. Anyway Im writing to ask for frugal advice on running shoes. I used to be a big spender back when I was running and bought expensive shoes constantly. I whipped my finances in shape during a time when I wasnt running for various reasons but now that Im back at it, I need to figure out a way to do this without spending $100-200 a month on shoes. Ideas? Tom Lets get this out of the way right now: I do not advocate anyone running in worn out shoes. You are begging for various physical problems by doing so. You should be replacing your shoes 300 to 500 miles or every 18 months, because the sole of the shoe simply wears down. Look at the bottom of the shoe and see if you see a lot of creases on the shoes bottom and theres significant discoloring thats a great sign of wear and you should probably get new ones. My recommendation is to find a good mid-cost model that really works well for you, buy a pair of them, and then stalk out bargains on that specific model. I have either personally liked or heard very good things about ASICS Gel Venture, Nike Revolution 4, and Adidas Cloudfoam, all of which are available under $50 a pair with ease, so try those. Once you have a sub-$50 pair you really like, just watch very closely for bargains on those shoes and buy multiple pairs at once if you find a really good deal. You can watch them on Amazon by using tools like Camel Camel Camel, for example. Q7: Roth IRA contribution question I decided to put some money that I got for Christmas from my wonderful generous grandparents into a Roth IRA. I opened one through Vanguard and went to deposit the money and they asked if it was a 2018 contribution or a 2019 contribution. Which should I choose? Not sure of the ramifications. Julie Since this is a new Roth IRA meaning you havent made any contributions to a Roth IRA in 2018, I assume and Im also assuming that (a) you havent filed your taxes for 2018 yet and (b) the amount youre contributing is less than $5,500, then you should make a 2018 contribution. Each year, youre allowed to contribute up to $5,500 to your Roth IRA starting in 2019, that limit goes up to $6,000. That window to contribute starts on January 1 of a given year and ends when you file your taxes for that year early in the following year. So, until you file your 2018 taxes (some time before mid April), you can still make a 2018 Roth IRA contribution, and you should do so because that window is about to close forever, plus it leaves the 2019 contribution window wide open. This is a great thing to be doing with a gift from grandparents, by the way. While they might want you to do something fun with that money, if you told them that you put it aside for your future, theyll be proud of you and for good reason. Heres another good Roth IRA question. Q8: Roth IRA or bigger e-fund? I have about $3,000 in an emergency fund which would be enough to get by for about two months. I am single with a 7 year old daughter. I have about $1,000 surplus in checking. Should I add to the emergency fund or add to my Roth? Nowhere near contribution limits for the year. Amy First of all, I want to say that I am in awe of what youre pulling off here. Youre a single mother who not only has a healthy emergency fund, but is also concerned about saving for retirement. You are on the ball and deserve kudos for that. Second, two months of living expenses is a good healthy emergency fund. If I were in your shoes, I would probably make the Roth contribution with most of the surplus, leaving a little behind in checking as a buffer. Then, I would set up an automatic transfer from checking to savings each week $10 or $15 or $20 should do. This way, your emergency fund automatically grows slowly over time and if you have to tap it, you know its going to refill over time with no further effort. So, Id probably contribute around $750 to the Roth IRA, then Id set up a $20 per week automatic transfer into my emergency fund going forward. Q9: Unwanted Christmas toys My kids receive an absurd number of gifts for Christmas each year. For the last few years, my husband and I have actually removed a few items from their pile that they were less interested in and put them aside to see if they remember them and if not we quietly sell them and put the money in their 529. We figure the gifts were unwanted. This past weekend my sister came over and mentioned the toy she had bought for our middle child. It was one he had overlooked and we had put in storage in the garage. We hadnt sold it yet. He wanted it so we dug it out and gave it to him. My sister was obviously curious as to what the deal was and we explained it to her and she got really mad at us and called us thieves. What are your thoughts? Jason I honestly dont see anything too wrong with your approach. Youre putting the gifts that your children arent interested in aside for a while, giving it some time in case they do think about them, and then if they dont, you sell them off and put the money aside for their college education. Its not as if youre stealing their toys or anything youre just turning the ones they dont want into something that will help them for life. Your sisters response might have had something to do with the fact that she apparently put a lot of thought into the gift and your child wasnt interested in the gift, which hurt her feelings. Her feelings were probably hurt even worse when she found out you were going to sell it unopened. This is one of those situations where you should just give it a little time and talk about it when the situation is less raw. I think your sister will see the sense in what youre doing. Q10: Marketing crocheted baby blankets In late 2018, three extended family members had babies so I crocheted a blanket for each one. The recipients seemed to genuinely love them and two suggested that I try to sell them. I enjoy making them but I dont even know where to start. Carrie My honest suggestion is that you throw out the suggestion to your social network. Post it on social media along with a picture or two of the baby blankets and say that youre willing to make them for baby shower or birth gifts. State your price and the dimensions and what kind of customization options you offer. Im honestly not sure what to charge for the blankets. Thats something you would be much better at assessing than I am. My suggestion would be to go relatively low in price at first cover the price of the yarn and make a little for yourself, but not a mint and then raise it if your blankets become popular. You might also consider an Etsy account in order to sell your wares. Q11: Where do I get advice? You give so much great advice! Where do you go when you need advice? Jenna When Im in a situation where I dont know what to do, I usually write it all out. Im a huge proponent of doing three morning pages, which is a journaling technique where you sit down each morning and just brain dump three pages of writing in a blank journal. I try really hard to do that every day, and it often turns into a forum for me to take a problem in my life and turn it over thoroughly with pros and cons. I usually need to really understand a problem first before I can look for meaningful advice on it. Quite often, this process will make the solution to my problem screamingly obvious. The next step, if journaling doesnt give me an answer, is always to talk to my wife, even if the advice I need involves her. We communicate with each other a lot not a day goes by without a few meaningful conversations. Sarah is my primary source for advice on everything. If Im still unsure, I usually go to the library and try to research ideas on my own. I tend to trust expert advice from books, where the reasoning behind the advice is usually laid out and I can see how that advice applies to my life. If Im still unsure, I usually talk to a few people in my life that I really trust. I have a few mentors in the community. I really trust and value the views of my parents and my wifes parents and my sister-in-law. I talk to them next. If Im still not sure what to do, Ill go talk to a professional in that particular field, but its very rare that I get to this point. Q12: Further areas of philosophy I have been enjoying your semi-regular series of Saturday articles about how different schools of philosophy provide personal finance guidance. What areas are you planning to cover in the future? Dane So far, Ive covered stoicism, Epicureanism, Aristotleanism, and secular Buddhism, for those interested. Danes note actually came in before the last one was posted. Going forward, I definitely want to write an article on transcendentalism, which Ive touched on indirectly several times. This would cover Emerson and Thoreau (who I hold in very high regard), among others. I can see a useful article on utilitarianism at some point. I want to read more about various Eastern schools of philosophy which, outside of secular Buddhism and a few others, I know little. Beyond that, it really depends on where my reading takes me. I love reading philosophy, particularly those with a practical angle that provides insights on how to live, and I find that most such schools of thought that deal with the practical in some fashion have a lot of application to personal finance. Got any questions? The best way to ask is to follow me on Facebook and ask questions directly there. Ill attempt to answer them in a future mailbag (which, by way of full disclosure, may also get re-posted on other websites that pick up my blog). However, I do receive many, many questions per week, so I may not necessarily be able to answer yours. https://www.thesimpledollar.com/questions-about-weddings-roth-iras-shoes-blankets-and-more/

[cyberdelusionphilosopher-blog]

vt insurance law

"vt insurance law

vt insurance law

BEST ANSWER:  Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://averageinsurancecost.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr 

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I don't know much about car insurance, but I have a six month premium and it is pretty expensive. I have had the insurance for 5 of the 6 months. My real question is after six months will I pay a least expensive amount or how does it work?""

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Beware of these guys; they are dangerous... In my state alone you don't have to buy car insurance if you can post a bond or if you have a fleet of cars i.e. if you can SHOW YOU HAVE THE ABILITY TO PAY FOR any damage you cause with your car. If I can pay for my own health care, why would I buy health insurance?""

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How much would car insurance be for an 18 year old male?

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I was just in a car accident on Thursday. Its basically totalled my car. Two weeks before the accident, I just put $2345 into the transmission, $500 2 weeks before that, and another $500 about a month before that. Thats not to mention the $1000 I put in in 2006. It was a troubled car but with the transmission fixed, it should have been perfect. The other car hit me. I really was at no fault but the other car is a company car. The people driving don't own it. They also don't seem to be American Citizens. Here's my damage, Broken Axels, my tires leaning into the car dramatically, my tire is ripped, the driver door doesn't open, blinker is gone, just severely damage to the quarter panel, ETC I did have some injury, a seat belt burn, back and neck pain. What can I expect from the insurance company? Will they take into account the recent expensive work done on the car? Any ideas? A guess? I had a 99' Hyundai Elantra - now I have scrap metal.""

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vt insurance law

vt insurance law

""Car insurance question, does adding someone to a policy for a car you own cost more? so 2 people for 1 car.?""

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Why are my car insurance rates so high?

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Insurance for renting a home?

I'm renting a home from a friend, and she says that she has to cancel her home insurance. Is there rental insurance, or any more suggestions.""

What motorcycle insurance companies would you recommend to any young rider aged 16-18?

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Whats the cheapest car insurance?

Whats the cheapest car insurance?

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I have heard that insurance companies charge interest if you decide to pay your car insurance monthly, but is there any insurance company that doesn't.""

Where can I find a good car insurance?

I leave in Los Angeles. at the present time I have insurance with Farmers but I want to change it because it is expensive. I'm thinking about Progressive Insurance, What do you think and what else do you suggest? Thanks""

How much would insurance cost if i drove an Audi S4 at the age of 16?

what would be the average insurance cost?

Car insurance cost in UK... seems too expensive?

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Cheapest car insurance for 18 Y/O male?

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Car insurance?

after a claim with my car insurance they wanted the policy payment in full,i would;nt pay it at first because of the crap service i recieved.4 weeks later i said i would pay as long as my policy ran its term they refused but still want the policy money.now they wont release my no claims bonus until i give them the money. what can i do ?""

Where can i find insurance for a barber shop?

what are the best insurance companies for barbershop insurance? where should i look?

Insurince on a Corvette?

I want to buy a 1974-1983 corvette I am 19 and have a perfect driving record Havent even be pulled over how much whould insurance cost on one I also live in Indiana

Aircraft insurance rates with DUI/DWI charge?

If one is a partner in a small aircraft, what effect does a potential DUI/DWI have on aircraft insurance rates?""

Motorcycle insurance?

Anyone have any idea on the cost on motorcylce insurance.. I'm 26 clean record..Thinking about getting a new yamaha cruiser 600-700cc

I scraped the bumper of a parked car. Is it cheaper to pay it off or send it to my insurance?

I have a clean driving record, but i accidentally scraped a car parked next to me. There was a dinnerplate sized scrape, and the guy sent me a estimate for $400. Will it be cheaper for me to send it to my insurance, or pay it out of pocket?""

What will my insurance company do about my car?

Last night we had server thunderstorms. There was golf-ball sized hail for about five minutes. I was parked on top of the garage. My windows are fine, but there are dents all over my car and my right side-view mirror is broken. My car is still in my mother's name, and the insurance company is State Farm. My parents are on a cruise right now and are supposed to be getting back tomorrow. I also go to UT and out-of-state school. I've heard other people on campus are getting new cars from their companies and others are just getting windows replaced. I haven't talked to anyone yet since the car is not in my name. My car is a 2001 chevy caviler. I don't know any of the details of the insurance policy.""

""In California, can I get my car title change into my name when I don't have auto insurance?""

In California, can I get my car title change into my name when I don't have auto insurance?""

Will car insurance go up if I get a speeding ticket?

Will my car insurance rate go up if I got a speeding ticket? Im in California. This is the first one ever, and I've been driving for about 4 years now. Anyone with an answer? Thanks in advance!""

Affordable nuvaring/other birth control?

I was using nuvaring for about the past 6 months and it's working really well. I got laid off from work and cannot afford to pay because I no longer have insurance. I called the ...show more

What options are availible to me for life insurance for my father who has pre existing conditions?

My dad over the past several years has seen his health go down hill, and until recenly, i have not been able to afford a life insurance policy for him. He has had strokes and heart attacks, so there are some pre existing conditions. Are there any life insurance policies that are affordable, that would cover him? Im just looking for something that would cover funeral cost.""

""If i have full coverage for car insurance that covers theft, how much should i get?""

esurance if it helps, do i get what i paid for the car when it was new or the bluebook value""

vt insurance law

vt insurance law

What's the best type of health insurance for a pregnant woman?

Is it PPO, HMO, etc...""

How much does it cost to run your car per month?

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Car insurance question?

Hello, I had car insurance on my Cadillac, and the car insurance coincidentally ended a few days after my Cadillac broke down. For the time being, I don't plan on getting it repaired (looking to sell it). My mother offered to let me borrow her car, which she has insured. She seems to think I need car insurance to be able to drive her car. Is that the case? (I don't live at my parents house anymore, and my name isn't on their policy fwiw)""

Does car insurance really go down at age 25?? how much?

How much does car insurance go down when a person turns 25? How much can I expect mine to go down? I am a woman now paying 82 a month. I have nothing on my record, no tickets, accidents, claims in my life (8 years since 16)""

I have a question about cars and insurance....?

i just bought a car and im going to go register it today and put insurance on it and i was wondering , can my husband drive my car even though the insurance is under my name only and the registration is also under my name? our insurance is basic (not full coverage) like if the police stops us... will we get in trouble? thanks""

How does being self employed affect car insurance rates?

I was laid off a month ago (I'm actually happy I was because I was not enjoying work at all). I've started my own company, and I mostly work from home and I don't drive ...show more""

Registering and insuring a salvaged car?

just bought a car with a salvaged title with full knowledge of such thinking i'll save some money. the car runs fine, everything functions as any other car and if the title ...show more""

Motorcycle insurance?

I am looking at buying a road bike to save money on gas. i am 21 years old and have a good driving history. how much do you pay for insurance? I live in Michigan? do i need insurance? does it matter the size engine for different price insurance?

Car insurance problems?!?! Need help!!?

Basically my hubby took out insurance about 10 months ago with a new insurance company. He had 4 years no claims with his old company so informed the new company of this. The new insurance company have been taking out the payments every month from our bank however we have never had his insurance documents off them. When he contacted them the other day to query this they informed him that because the old insurance company will not supply them with no claims info they can not cover him. However all this time and even today they have taken their monthly payment. Surely they should not be taking payments for something they are saying they can not cover?? They have sent him a 30 day temp cover note for now while we try to sort it but it isnt looking good at the mo. My question is should they have cancelled the agreement before now then and ceased taking money from our account?

Insurance for a camaro...engine types?

Well I've been looking into getting a camaro but insurance may be too much. I just have a few simple questions for anyone who knows. Does the insurance company charge more for an Iroc / Z28? Would they know if you bought a camaro with a (for ex.) 377 stroker and charge more? I was looking at a camaro with an LG4 hoping the insurance would be lower but how would they know what motor it has? Also...for the winter can you temporarily take the camaro off, to put a winter car on? I don't want to be paying for insurance when its being stored. Thanks!""

What would the cheapest car to insure be (uk)?

any suggestions on what would be a cheap car to insure for a new driver (18)

Car insurance question?

I'm 16, and im currently driving my parents car to and from school. im insured as a full time driver and have been driving since February. at the end of the summer i plan on buying my own car, and i was wondering if we cancelled my insurance on my parents car for me, and insured me on the new car would it cost more or less than it is now?""

Can my insurance company deny my claim...?

Lots of info, sorry! My car was parked on the street and hit during the night. I drove the car to the repair place the following morning and the airbag deployed on the way there. (Stupid, I know, I wasn't thinking). My insurance company, GEICO is insisting that the damage is not consistent with a hit and run accident. They have taken recorded statements from me and my boyfriend. They have contracted an independent accident reconstructionist to read the airbag deployment. The reconstructionist originally told me that he was unable to retrieve the data, but the insurance company is now telling me that he was able to get a partial reading. And that it shows that the airbag deployed as a result of impact. The airbag did not actually fully deploy. There is no powder or injury to me to justify a complete deployment. Does anybody know if they have the right to deny my claim based on suspicion? They keep trying to make me say that my boyfriend was driving the car, which he wasn't. We were in the house together all night. Also: car was in previous fire; severe damage to front of car, all repaired. accident happened in CA, full coverage policy written in GA I know its a lot of info. Thanks for reading and I appreciate any helpful answers. Thanks!""

Car for teenager. please help?

So I'm really interested in the 2012 Mercedes slk350. Its 499 a month but how much would insurance be? My parent make about 200k a year but will they be able to afford that? I really want this car but i need to know what the average insurance for a teenager is.. thank you so much for your help

Insurance for 1975 stingray?

What would you estimate the insurance would be for a 16 year old boy with a 1975 stingray?

Cheap car insurance offers?

Hi Folks....What companies are offering good deals on car insurance these days,based on your experience.......Frederick""

""Can I get a refund of life insurance premiums I paid? I set up a $100,000.00 life insurance policy?

August 2009. Monthly premiums were deducted automatically from my checking account. recently I had to change my checking account number because someone got access to my banking info. and made unauthorized deductions. This in turn caused my monthly insurance premiums from getting paid. The insurance Co. requested a substantial fee to reinstate my policy I cannot afford this fee can I get a refund of premiums paid and cancell the policy?

Cost of car insurance?

I don't have enough details about the car to fill in the online comparison websites, so does anyone know roughly how much I should expect to pay? - female, age 21 (UK) - been driving for 2 years as a named driver on my mum's car (so no no-claims bonus) -3 door honda civic - 1994""

What car insurance companies are in Washington? Can I get a list to look up?

I need to find the cheapest for myself. I am getting my license this Friday and I will be going to a car insurance company on my way home so that I can drive my car. Can I get a list of all the auto insurance companies in Washington?

Geico car insurance late?

my geico car insurance will be due in 3 days but it will be ten days after that do i get paid do you have a grace period or i time frame after the due date with geico

When getting an insurance quote do you have tell them what your tickets have been reduced to or....?

I am going to get an insurance quote and need to know if I can tell them what my tickets were reduced to or if I have to tell them what I was actually pulled over for.

Michigan Auto Insurance Premium almost twice as much as quote!?

I'll do my best to summarize my situation, and am using estimates for days and amounts... I received a quote for auto insurance for $590 for a 6 month period from an independent auto agent. When I received my insurance policy and premium price it way nearly double (over $1,100). I cancelled the policy within a week after receiving the huge increase in premiums. Because of the time it took for me to receive my new premium and the 5-7 days for me to cancel, I received a bill for an amount due of roughly $40.00. I previously had auto insurance through the company/agent but it was for a different vehicle and paid a month in advance. My question is, why am I responsible, and how am I responsible for the premium that is so much higher than what I was quoted? I didn't sign any paperwork, I called over the phone and had the agent switch the policy based on the new quote. Auto insurance played a huge factor in budgeting for the vehicle and I feel that I was ripped off. I should be getting a credit for the 10 days that I did not use, not having to pay more for the days I did use. Thanks for any advice you're able to provide!""

Insurance change after marriage?

i am american and i got married in canada. my husband does not have insurance and i am covered under my mothers insurance. since i got married in canada will they see here in the us that i am married or will they know and i wont be covered anymore? i have not changed my last name to my husbands. if i still keep using my mothers insurance could i get into trouble if they found out i was married?

Can the mother of my child not allow me to use her health insurance for our child?

So I have a very sick little girl. The mother of my child has health insurance provided to her and our child by her father. Our baby recently got really sick. She needs certain shots based on what her current levels of things are in her body, so I am not able to give her the shots. The mother is telling me that I have to Pay for someone to give her the shots to our daughter will not be able to come to my house. The mother has health insurance and is unwilling to give me the information for her. Is that allowed? I live in california and there is nothing in our court order that says anything about this.""

Do car insurance quotes go up daily?

I am being quoted much more now than a fortnight ago

vt insurance law

vt insurance law

Can i drive my car without insurance for the time being in California?

I'm 16 and i just got a new car yesterday. My parent's have already added my name to their insurance, but that was before they bought me a car. Can i legally drive without insurance for the time being?""

What kind of license do you need to sell auto insurance?

What kind of license do you need to sell auto insurance?

Auto insurance for a 16 year old female?

*im adding some details i forgot to add last time, sorry for the question repost I was trying to do the online quote thing but i cant because its asks for a phone in order to generate the rates , and im most certainly not about to give them my phone number. No way jose.thats why im asking. -Im a 16 year old female -Dont have a license (yet) -im single -I would be driving a 2001 kia... i think sephia? Idk but it looks like a very basic car. -I have good grades -i have never gotten tickets or DUIS -I live arizona -I would only be driving to school which is approx. Seven minutes away fron where i live -I would only also be driving to work which is about 15 min away -I work part time So do any of u have an estimate??? Also please dont comment something irrelevant or pointless""

Is car insurance higher if your car only has two doors?

If your car has two doors, instead of four, is the price of car insurance higher?""

Is affordable life insurance possible for someone over 70?

Please answer...

What insurance is right for me?

I have an '86 Dodge Ram 100 and I would like to have the cheapest insurance there is. I don't want my truck covered, I would rather just have the other person's vehicle covered. Can someone please tell me what insurance is right for me?""

Where do I get SR-22 insurance?

I got a DUI and obviously need SR-22... I have an 05 Grand Prix which is currently under my parent's insurance policy (which saves me a about $150/month) Here's my problem- I need SR-22 to get my license back, and to get SR-22 added to the policy I need my license.. Catch 22 (ha) SO I've been dealing with this for a while now. Heres the question- How, and where can I get SR-22 without having to put my car on a new policy? Having my own policy as a single female under the age of 25 (with 2 wrecks and 1 DUI on my record) is OUTRAGEOUS... Any ideas??? I'm tired of being illeagal. Thank you SO much. -Oh Yeah- Non-Owners insurance won't work because the car is in my name.""

Step parents health insurance?

I was wondering is it possible for my soon to be wife, to put my kids on her health insurance plan from work? The children live with us. We are in california.""

What is the best insurance company to work for?

I'm looking to get in an insurance career but not sure which one is good to work for or knowing if I should go for auto or life insurance. Is auto better to work then life? which one does have traing or free class training? thanks

Why do liberals keep referring to the new health insurance system as affordable? ?

I work on film crews. It an be a long time between movie projects, so I deliver pizzas between crews instead of going on unemployment like many of my film crew buddies. I also own some crappy land, which I inherited, that won't sell. It's just sitting there on the market, screwing me out of qualifying for anything and everything my tax dollars are used for in the way of entitlement funding. I live in a travel trailer. As soon as I have to start paying an upwards of $200 a month for health insurance that is only going to go up, up and up now that pre-existing conditions must be covered, I'm going to have to move into a tent. What part of this is affordable?""

Got into a car accident with rental and declined the insurance?

hi all i was hoping you could get some facts/and or legal advice. Ok so i have been renting this car for about 6 month now because i cant afford a down payment for my own. I had my own car insurance which covered the rental. However(bad luck struck) i got into a car accident 2 days after my car insurance lapsed i have since renewed my policy right away with another insurance company that gave me better rates. The fault of the accident has not yet been determined. I believe it was the other persons fault. however i am worried what will happen if it is deemed to be my fault. i was not covered at the time of the accident, i did not obviously have coverage through the rental company. i want to make something clear that i am a person of good faith and if it were to be deemed as my fault i have no problem paying the other persons deductable. but i am worried about someone going after me for thousands and thousands or jail time or loosing my licence. so my questions are do rental car companies carry default uninsured motorist coverage(even if i opp out of purchasing theres?) if it is my fault do i get to pay the other persons deductable(and damage to rental) and walk away? will her insurance sue me for full cost of repairs? will her insurance go after rental company go after rental place for money? will her insurance go after my new insurance even though i was not covered by them at the time of the accident? fyi: no one was hurt, she has a minor medium size dent in door panel, i have small tear in my bumper""

Health insurance questions...?

My health insurance is provided by and paid for by my employee. They are changing insurances effective Sept 1st; I'm scheduled for surgery on Sept 8th through the other company. How does this work? Do my deductibles that I've paid roll over?

Easy ways to save extra money on car insurance?

i am looking at buying a evo ix (for those who don't know, it is the quickest car under 50K) and i am just wondering how to save some money on car insurance. should i be listed as a part-time driver with a parent, as i am only 20 yrs old. ????""

What will happen if I don't have health insurance?

What will happen if I don't have health insurance?

Does your insurance rates change when you switch it to a different car?

I drive a 2001 cavalier and I'm getting another used car in about a month (2004 pontiac grand prix) I'm under 25 so my insurance rates sky rocket. Will it be cheaper to transfer my current insurance over to the Grand Prix or to just get new insurance all together ?

How do I get medical insurance?

Is it offered when you have a job? If i have children, do i just add them to the plan?""

I need cheap car insurance in New York City?

I need cheap (FULL) coverage for a financed vehicle in the NEw York Area...I've tried the popular sites...any leads?

Why is my car insurance quote so high?

I have been to CompareTheMarket for a quote on car insurance, and the cheapest quote was around 5,000 for a car that costs 250. Why is my quote so high? I'm a first time driver living in an area with a fairly high crime rate. After changing the address to my girlfriends the quote came down to 2,000. This is still way too much considering the cost of the car! Is there any way to bring the insurance cost down? I wont be able to afford to drive at this rate.""

2 insurances? 2 deductibles?

If I have 2 insurances one has a 500 deductible and a 80/20 coverage and my x has an insurance that has a 750 deductible, does this mean we both have to pay each of our deductibles for our child? She is getting a MRI, what happens, will my insurance make us pay the first 500, then the 20 percent.. Then does the remainder go to her secondary insurance, then the first 750 comes off top of the balance again?""

Ohio health insurance?

Can someone recommend me a good health insurance for college student? I live in Ohio, non-smoker Thanks""

What would be the car insurance group for a renault megane cabrio dymanique 1600cc?

I am selling my car and have been asked what insurance group it is please.

Israelic terms on health insurance?

I had to redo an experiment by Tykocinski. She researched the impact of certain primes, one of which is health insurance. She did this study in Israel. We replicated this study in the Netherlands, but we found different results and now we need to figure out why. For this reason I would like to know: What is the word for health insurance in Hebrew and Arabic? And how would they translate 1 on 1 with the english language. Example: the Dutch word for health insurance is zorgverzekering, but if I translate the words apart from each other I get either worry insurance or care insurance (depending on the interpretation of the Dutch language) The answer to this question could help me greatly in this research!""

Can my employer drop group health insurance coverage while I am pregnant?

I live in Oklahoma and I just found out that I am pregnant and my employer is considering dropping my group health insurance. Are there any laws that prevent me from being dropped? How do I continue my health insurance to cover my pregnancy?

""At age 60 without employment,i need affordable insurance please help.?""

At age 60 without employment,i need affordable insurance please help.?""

Which insurance company offers the cheapest car insurance for new and young drivers?

Which insurance company offers the cheapest car insurance for new and young drivers?

vt insurance law

vt insurance law

https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/how-much-motorcycle-insurance-noah-cunningham/"

[somedaypast-thesunset]

so hes essentially stopped having sex with me. physical affection is like.. few and far between. and i guess, thanks? i guess? like step up from my oshawa ex for sure - he fucked me until i left. so like, thanks? thanks for not just using me? 

i tried to be more understanding like maybe this is just how he feels right now but these little things managed to add up and with his refusal for sex ... i mean, he’s not “refusing”. i dont really come on to him. the last time we did have sex it was pretty bad. like bad enough both of us admitted it was pretty bad. i thought maybe that had something to do with it.

but he started nitpicking and being rude about it. like leaving my shoes at the door - which he does everyday all day; but it’s not my house and i should be a perfect guest always and if i’m not, it’s disrespectful. he suggested that i gain weight - jokingly mind you, but not really. finally he told me to “put money aside” to pay for myself at meals with friends because it made him uncomfortable. then suggested that “instead of not going at all” i run a tab with him and keep track of everything he buys me. 

i told him no thanks. i dont want a walking credit card. i never wanted that. that doesnt make my life any better at all. its more uncomfortable for me that the guy whos dick i suck makes me pay for all my meals. and i get it - he doesnt need to cover all of them. but holy fuck what kind of relationship is it that you cant even go out because your partner wont pay for your meal? your partner ho makes more money ad has more disposable income than a majority of our peers. 

i just thought it was really careless to make a suggestion like this when i cannot afford to eat out. period. thats not a luxury i can have right now and u know what? THATS OKAY. holy fuck, of all the luxuries i dont need and am not going to die from; it’s that. i kept thinking it was like a keeping up th the joneses kind of thing. like i’m paying to go out to eat food not to eat food but to prove i can afford to go out and eat food to a group of people. i PREFER to live frugually. even hen i have OTHER PEOPLES MONEY i try to save and be frugal for them because i feel disgusted hen a large amount of money is wasted. ive had dozens of opportunities to spend his money hoever i wanted and continually chose the cheapest option. only recently did i start choosing take out options OVER 10$. like i was literally choosing anything under 10$ so i wouldnt be a burden while his meal ould be 20 -25$. 

he tried to be friendly afterwards but i felt like it was a final straw. its never a discussion. its just hurling insults at me and completely disregarding the reason why i have suh little money. my entire being is dedicated to not being brought down by him ad people like him in the interim of hopefully making my life better. like if i cant get through this then i dont even have a hope of it being better and apparantly “this” is being shit on over and over and over again. i just.. i dont care anymore. he was really just annoying me at this point. im tired of being made to feel super poor. like no one else does this to me. i do manage to take care of myself a good portion of the time and most know where my money goes. im tired of having to give myself a pep talk to feel better about myself because hes made me question my value and worth. 

last night i slept crammed against the wall. literally. and hes come to a point he feels this is appropriate because sleeping together is such a hassle for him and it just reminded me of my abusive ex. but then he decided to jack off beside me first thing in the mornig and i was done. like i guess im very hard headed but hey - i get it now. i’m nothing to you. i dont deserve anything. i dont deserve to wake up peacefully, a good morning - nothing. all i deserve is to ake up to some disgusting man jacking off beside me. i got dressed, gathered my stuff and left. i said nothing to anyone, i just left. cuz hat the fuck is the point? i felt like a little “guilty” that this would create anxiety for him but who the fuck even cares? i dot even want to have a conversation with him because i dont have conversations ith him i just listen to him. there is no back and forth, no discovery or discussion. its just me listening to him. so why fucking bother. he knows i wouldnt leave unless i was upset so the “point” is made but i have no point. i’m just done, i think? i think you know youre the most done when words are not useful anymore ad like there is nothing i want to discuss. i dont even ant to tell him what a shitty person hes been. all it leads to is guilt and pity and sticking around because he thinks hes supposed to. i want to be with someone who wants to be with me. but like that never happens. no oe ever wants to be with me. they want to be ith some other perso but i’m good enough. and it sounds very woe is me but this is the truth. ad i am an attractive nice person. i am very caring and loving and loyal. i am a great girlfriend. but no one ever wants to actually be with me. theyve always wanted someone else, someone else is always actually “the one” ad theyve either gotten away or they never got a chance and now they’re just stuck with _me_. my first “love” was already in love ith someone else but it as never going to happen (and hen he thought it as going to it didnt and he still came back to me and that is not even a bonus thats just proving my point). my second, still enamored with his ex he never fully proved cheated on him but he thought she did (but u know maybe she didnt). and all the men in between - they wanted someone else. they predictably ended up with a few of the someone elses. and right now is just repeating this scenario. 

and you know, i come across these dudes and they tell ME they love ME. i would never dare utter such words to these people and give myself like that unless it was very important for me to do. like if i as a year into it and no one said shit and i felt strongly about it, then maybe i would but i dont even offer this to close friends. love is the most serious. 

but they tell me they love me. and all i want is love. i dont even want necessarily to BE LOVED but i would like love to exist in my life in a very pure and geuie ay that ive witnessed with others. its not like i need love and attention from all these people. i dont need love to be validated as a person. i can be without love temporarily and move forward in life. i have less sources of love than many people ad im not actively seekig it from dozens of people. but if someone asks me what do you want? perhaps i want money and security. this ould be high on the list. but i think most of all i want love. i want to experience love. my parents did not love me. or maybe my father did but i dot think he was wholy capable of giving pure love. these are perhaps the people who should be my pillars ad theyre not ad everyoe else got to experience love - not eve sexual love. its not eve sexual. its not romantic. everyone aroud me has bee able to experience pure true love of some form and i feel like i have not. like theres nevere been a single stable source of love for any length of time in my life.

and society is tryig to fill this void with medication and money and everything else but actual love an like i guess its hard not to believe that im undeserving or incapable of feeling love or receiving love. and i think this is like a top 5 survival need. like food, water, shelter, love. maybe this is the intricate part of the human experience and we so easily cover food and water and shelter now for many people but you canot cover love. you cannot package it into a goverment subsidy and yet so may people suffering have lacked love. and this pushes them to drugs and alcohol and they suffer from depression and obesity and they eat themselves to diabetes and they let their feet rot off their legs because no matter how hard they worked, no matter all the good deeds they did; they never fully received their dues in love. they suffered ad struggled alone an family ad frieds and relatioships left them but hey - they made some money. and thank god they didt just “live on welfare”. but its like - if someone did not have food or water or shelter, you ouldnt immediately offer them a job to solve the problem. there is a immediate need that has to be filled before they can help themselves. you have to give them food so they can work. if no one cares, why the fuck should they? like you’re noteve a person you’re just “the homeless” now. and like everythng of your life is referred to as “the homeless” life now. 

im surrounded by people who have been given a lot of love in their life. even though theyve become blinded to their priviledges, theyve been given so much love. they are spoiled. they cant eve see the love thats being given. i argued with a mutual fried about another; she said it was rude to say this fried ould always be there heever she needed it and not show up. i told her isnt it enough to know in your soul this person wants that so badly for you but real life dictates differetly? like the love is there. the intention is there but real life doest allow it. she couldnt see the love. 

and i guess maybe some of these people are so spoiled that they dot understad the importance of something that is like breathing air to them. they probably believe i can get love elsewhere, just like they do. they are rich in love. but its the same thing - if someone tells me they love me, i actually believe they love me. well, i want to believe. 

i also believe this problem is “easily” solved for women by having children. children are a constant source of love and hen they turn out not to be, it’s ground shaking. mothers dont kno how to go on. but i believe, even in solid relationships, that children come from a desire to give and receive love that is not currently in their life. maybe i dont understand a maternal instinct. perhaps maternal instinct is this. maybe its kicked in and im too logical to understand that its not that “easy”. neither are relationships, and at least your kids legally arent allowed to abandon you. but i think this is why, especially with young mothers, theyre inclined (if single) to sort of “lose focus” on their children when a new man enters. suddenly, especially ina “honey moon phase”, theyre receiving a ton of love. more love and attention than their children, of any age, can probably give them. 

i have little expectations with love. i mean, i assume if you “love me” you wont be cruel or malicious. like, you wont try to harm me. thats what i expect. i dont even expect NOT to be harmed. i may be harmed. thats involved in love. you cant feel such strong things for someone and not be harmed somewhere down the line. it could be big or small; someone will eventually feel bad but then it’ll probably be okay again. however someone gives love, i try to receive it as is without shaping it to what i believe is right. love is abstract; you accept it as is but we all want to read into it and find the deeper meaning and stories and little things involved but in the end its just a very abstract concept hich encompasses a wide range of emotions and psychological things. you cant really say, “if you loved me you would do this or this”. its like you are the artist and love is your paint and the world is a canvas. you cant tell picasso how to paint. that only fits your mold. we liked picasso because of how he expressed it, how he painted it - not how you shaped his painting to your liking. 

and like youre allowed to not like someones painting - someones expression of love. and some people, they suck. like they just outright suck ass they need to go back to basics and start over before they unleash anymore of their “artistry”. and some people are offensive. some people create offensive things and this thing might hurt people or make people uncomfortable. most people ask to have their “art” - their “expression of love” taken seriously. however good or bad it is, it’s theirs and this is how they see it. but its like, i dont have to buy a jackson pollock and hang it on my wall because i respect his expression. i dont have to have sex with a woman because i respect homosexuality. so you can accept, respect and walk away from someones expression. it doesnt have to be for you. you can even have the freedom to speak about your feelings of this expression for yourself but you cant dictate how someone else should feel. 

i guess my situation is many of these men bought a picasso - or tried to, and for whatever reason, it’s not aroud anymore so they’ll accept a pollock in its place because i mean, he’s still “pretty good”. 

but you know - at the same time, it’s okay. this isnt a unique situation. this is very much part of the human experience. everyone at some point will feel this way to some degree. i just happen to feel it really strongly right now because of my circumstances in life. its like taking shrooms and one perso is cool ad another trips badly; theyre just not in the right place in the right way to experience this thing of life.  thats me right now. i wasnt prepared for this trip ad its pretty never ending. its like a really long road trip in fear ad loathing but its like 10 years of sitting ith johny depp and youve foud out he beats his ife and is a severe alcoholic and its just... overwhelming. 

so i dont know. i need to really accept and take this knowledge seriously. im proud that i just left because ive stayed too many times. i thought about it an had my guilt and ould stay for my shitty ride home and get my “daily kiss” and its just like.. i no longer hate myself this much. i can do better than this scenario. its not even a personal insult to him - his personality is cool. as a human, great. but the scenario we have created - WE, okay. not him. this is a joint effort where i allowed someone to treat me like this with full knowledge that it was bullshit. no one held me hostage and it wast like i just became a personal slave to him. but its like, i even explained it with drugs. once you allow yourself to normalize gross things, its not hard to become a junkie. like if you decide smoking crack or injecting drugs is the worst shit but suddenly you’ll smoke meth and you’ll inject a “safe” drug like k but “not heroin”. this is the “gateway effect”. so we normalized this really shitty behavior ad made it easy for him to fall into habits of doing things others would (and have) walked away from. 

you know, i hate that he makes future plans and none of them involve me. ever. but he tells me he loves me. and its like, i dont even have anxiety about whether or not ill see him today. i kind of hope i dont. i think itll be easy to assume im upset he “wont buy me food anymore”. but i really just.. we are on two different planets. equally confused by each others wants and needs. i dont eve want a conversation because if someone doesnt have the desire to be affectionate with me why bother asking.