#but i also don't think i succeeded
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him just opening a window to scream at a random universe
#utmv#error sans#undertale au#tw eyestrain#wanted to try more saturated colors#i don't think i failed#but i also don't think i succeeded#he's stressed#i promise to draw him having a tea party with his puppets or sm i swear#<- do remind me of this you know how i am
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Hopping on this twt trend by drawing Miku as girls I could probably encounter in my hometown
#like i don't think i succeeded in drawing anything recognizably german/bavarian#besides the spezi and bavaria blue ig lmfao#but they're still cute so <333#also i don't think anyone but me ever thinks about the phrase “auf geht's jungs” tbh#hatsune miku#miku#viina art
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Honestly, I'm very excited to find out what happened to Caleb and Beau, but specifically because Ludinus's current status is WILD for Caleb's epilogue in particular. It means his boyfriend is basically free and clear of everyone who has explicit material knowledge of the deal he made. It means the goal he planned to dedicate his life to is basically complete within six years. It means that virtually no one left on the Assembly cares much what kinds of changes he makes to Soltryce from here on out.
Ludinus is on the moon and probably not coming back, given the general expectations of the heroic fantasy genre, and the rest of it is a whole lot of "not Caleb's problem".
What does this man even do with the rest of his life?
#also who succeeded vess. this is the real question. no one in that role isn't fucking evil.#I'm just thinking about it. I don't imagine they'll have the same kind of time in the one-shot to go through epilogues again but like.#I do hope there's a lil bit. I wanna know what caleb does knowing that this massive problem is no longer a problem for him.#I am admittedly also presuming that margolin was implicated in or at least disgraced by the scourger shit cuz like#that's just not an easy thing to claim you knew nothing about lmfao#and fuck 'im#but like. the rest of the group is just. whatever yanno. but does caleb keep pushing? idk#I think he should get to be headmaster he'd be great at that#but then I am a caleb as magical headmaster truther so#ANYWAY I just want to see it. I wanna see what caleb looks like when he has absolute freedom before him.#it's WHAT HE DESERVES DAMMIT.#critical role#caleb widogast
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me: waiting for shoe(s) to drop
Personified Alan Becker YouTube Icon: oh... buddy...
#me reassuring myself like#it's okay. look see? they can speedrun the genuine apology process too. see? yeah i know#i know#--/ art#L1_CAT#subpixels#alan becker#green influencer arc#ava influencer arc#(OHMYGO D BRIAN MADE IT??????? NO WONDER IT'S GLORIOUS?!?!?!?)#i don't think there will be- well no. that's a lie there will totally be more great works with these specific themes in the future . . .#because there will probably be these specific problems in the future. but W0w does it hit now.#not that long ago i know i was dealing with angst online. and that just. permeates everything. for *months*#what a shot to the heart !!! new weakness unlocked ! ! ! !#/pos ... yeah no it's. you know what i mean#ghhhhghh the imperfect files feeling defensive about not being included hhhhhhhhhhhhhh kindness to snarling creatures hhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!#gonna need to rewatch this a few more times. at Least. hooh#ps: i have a vivid memory of reading a fic on ao3 that emotionally compromised me and i saw in the notes that the author said...#''[please trust me. i know what im doing c: ]'' or something that that's what they meant. it was either a doctor who or a good omens one.#and i did trust them. and the story continued being amazing. and they didn't let me drown in that space i found myself in.#i feel responsible for not letting myself get too far underwater like that- and i have succeeded.#and i also trusted Them (scriptors directors animators etc etc etc). and i am. safe#it feels like there was a wound here i forgot about that is only now beginning to heal. . . ... . . . . . .#i think ill be 100% ready to laugh about it in like. a year. for now we roll catharsis gang#a year is maybe too long. you know what i mean. arbitrary time unit. laundry minutes.
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Sparkstember Day 19: Lil' Beethoven (Ride 'Em Cowboy)
First of all, let this very important fact be known: the love I have for all three albums in the Lil' Beethoven trilogy cannot be overstated. I think I can safely call them my favourite pieces of art ever made. You know, when you look forward to something and it not only lives up to all your expectations but it's also just SO SO much more? Something about this neoclassical / dada / deconstruction of pop music / whatever-you-should-even-call-it approach is absolutely PERFECTLY suited for my tastes, and I didn't even know I was looking for something EXACTLY like this until I found it.
I think the circumstances of my first hearing of this album are pretty funny and something I got pretty lucky with actually (I often think about this with Sparks in general, as much as I wish I've known about them sooner I also do feel like they appeared in my life when I needed that the most. But anyway.) I was very eagerly looking forward to hearing it and finally seeing for myself what the genius of this album is all about. But I insisted that I can only do it through a physical format because yesss, let's make it even more *special*! The moment I've been waiting for! So yeah let's gooo, I need to wait until my CD arrives in the mail (that was one of the longest weeks of my life). And then I started to wonder, well, maybe I actually won't like it that much. To hype myself up to this extent and then be severly dissapointed - would have sucked!
Well, I was NOT dissapointed. Instead I was perplexed, confused, but also very intrigued and quite, ok not just quite, *completely* amazed already. That was the initial reaction and I think it's a rare but very beautiful moment when this happens - no need to *fully* grasp it right away, but enough to be all like "oh that was SOMETHING. I need more." As I said after that first listen (and I actually have my whole LIVE reaction to hearing LB written down lmao, that's how much of a big deal this was for me), I felt like it actually has to grow on me a bit still, gradually but surely with each next listen, rather than the 1st listen being THE prime listening experience. And that was very true! But it wasn't even gradual, it was very fast, seriously. And something very important that stood out to me right away too were the melodies - something about them, and that continues into HYL and ECOTD too. It's this classic feeling of: this always existed, or at least it feels like I've known it for years already. And as I listen more and become more familiar with them the magic still grows.
It's of course no coincidence to me that an album that relies so much on extreme levels of repetition is so addicting, even hypnotising. And once upon a time I thought that I couldn't like something that's too repetitive and therefore could be considered monotonous or "predictable". But nothing is predictable about LB actually. (Besides... ok, I'll get to that one bit later). But yeah, it's good for the brain. And it's been said before by others but this music definitely has this certain neurodivergent appeal thanks to all this, and, well, I love that aspect of it so much and I definitely relate to it on some level that goes even deeper than just song topics and instrumentation choices. It's in the structure and the fundaments of it all too.
I legally can't finish this without a dedicated paragraph to the 2004 Live In Stockholm performance because HOLY SHIT. Feeling so lucky again that all three of these albums got this treatment and we have recordings of these half-concert-half-performance-art pieces that we can now marvel at. I will say that like, a pretty big part of the sum of the appeal that LB has as an album is stored in this show and its visual and narrative elaboration on its themes. And also it's just so fun to watch! Sometimes I thought about how this might be an even better introduction to LB / this era of Sparks / Sparks in general than the actual album but well, never had a chance to test that and you know. Maybe shouldn't recommend Sparks with one of the most leftfield things there is to be found from them. Either way, very good, very important, felt like experiencing the power of LB for the first time all over again.
So now, please hear my exact reasonings for why I so deeply love (almost) every single one of these songs......
The Rhythm Thief
NO song made such a big impression on me the first time I heard it as this. I might have gotten more used to it after all this time but man, The Rhythm Thief, you will always be the realest one to me. This is what made me look forward to the whole album so much and convinced me that it would be like nothing else I've heard before. And that turned out to be so very beautifully true!
How Do I Get To Carnegie Hall?
I could listen to this one a hundred times in a row over and over and not get sick of it one bit. That's it, idk what else to add, beautiful and ethereal in every way
What Are All These Bands So Angry About?
Mostly I just want to direct everyone's attention to the bridge section, at the 2:26-2:52 time mark, which as far as I can say is the most heavenly piece of music ever made. Feeling like that Winnie The Pooh soul leaving his body gif each time I hear this
I Married Myself
Aromantic anthem, to me. Not that much to say actually but it's just, a very sweet and pretty song even when it might be taken as just this sort of ironic piece, I think it's this situation where a song can be taken more or less literally and it doesn't lose anything, rather the sincerity takes on a new sort of meaning? Because yes, maybe this hyperbolic situation (marrying yourself) COULD be the solution to the heartbreak of failed relationships. Ever thought about that??? Ok, stopping right here and leaving my I Married Myself analysis for another day
Ride 'Em Cowboy
My mind is blank on this one suddenly. But it's so good believe me. I love it a lot. It just has this LB spirit that makes it very addicting to listen to
My Baby's Taking Me Home
This was sort of the first Sparks song I've ever heard, or maybe that I quote-unquote purposefully listened to, and I think that's pretty important considering that it was the moment that ultimately lead to... all this. This song has always been incredibly beautiful and powerful to me, but lately it just makes me emotional to an extent that makes it hard to listen to most of the time. I WOULD sell all my material possessions for even one chance to experience this song live by the way
Your Call Is Very Important To Us. Please Hold
Earns soooo much as a live version, but even without that I think it's genius in the same way as The Rhythm Thief, and maybe the most disquieting piece here overall... If we ignore the next one maybe
Ugly Guys With Beautiful Girls
Sitting there hearing the intro of this song all like "huh, this is so chill and calm... too calm..." and then being hit with, well, everything that's going on in this song afterwards was truly THE MOMENT back in the day (and re: the predictability thing. idk though, it's not like, really an issue). Later on I decided that this sort of narrative nature of the song makes it have less replayability value than the rest (???) but I abandoned that opinion soon enough, thank god. I love it how long it took me to realize that this song and the ending of MBTMH are the only times when drums appear on this entire album (I mean no, I'm not very proud of that fact actually, as the self-proclaimed biggest LB fan in my area. And The Rhythm Thief literally saying "say goodbye to the beat"... come on man). So yes, sometimes less is more! I adore this song now it's such a treat I would gladly terrorize my neighbours with it
Suburban Homeboy
Ok, I'm sorry Suburban Homeboy fans but this is the only song here that I'm not a HUGE fan of. I still think it's brilliant and an incredibly fitting ending for the whole thing - the mood whiplash is amazing as this is the only "vaguely happy sounding" song on here, per my words from months back. And what's better than yelling WE ARE THE SUBURBAN HOMEBOYS! (I'm actually awaiting today's Sparks karaoke rating reveal very impatiently lol the reveal happened before I posted this and I'm very happy about it)
One more actually, a quick word on Wunderbar because it gave us two things that we might have not been able to do without: 1) this whole album actually (the fact that LB exists because of Wunderbar giving the Maels the idea to continue meddling with this style. Up there as one of my fav pieces of Sparks trivia) 2) anddddd the 21×21 performance of it of course
#god these are getting harder and harder to write instead of easier this one took me like 3 hours#but it also is long as heck so. idk it turned out pretty good though. i'm happy with it#i don't know why i feel so silly still writing these#maybe i really went a little bit overambitious with preparing two separate things for each day#but if there's even one or two people who enjoy these i can rest knowing that i have succeeded on this front#also i wish i could have come up with a cool dynamic pose like this for the drawing but no#it's based on the poster of a movie of the same name as the featured song#and honestly now i feel like it's extra fitting for spars and their love for referencing cinema and other pop culture things#and thank god i had an excuse to go completely minimalistic for once. all in all i'm quite happy with the result#cool to do something slightly different sometimes and it also just fits the spirit of the album i think!#anyway LB my beloved. seriously never getting over how good the 00s era albums are#lifechanging outstanding mesmerizing exceptional etc#sparkstember 2024#my art#goose monologues
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Fish, 7 (For your prompts! ❤️)
Hi, anon!! Thank you for the prompt, you were the very first one to send one in! 7 was, again, the wildcard, so I randomly generated a different number to land on Yue Qingyuan (from Scum Villain)! I have no choice but to dedicate this to @bytedykes, because I told her about this prompt and she said “yqy pet fish mental health speedrun” and we went, uh, a little insane about it. Enjoy some yuefang, folks!!!!
“Mu-xiong,” Yue Qingyuan says. “I’m sorry to bother you. Are you available?”
“Yue-xiong is never a bother,” Mu Qingfang says warmly. “And I am, actually, yes. Is everything okay, Yue-xiong?”
“I think I need help.” A bit dramatic, perhaps, and Yue Qingyuan hates to trouble Mu Qingfang on a rare day off, but Yue Qingyuan and impulse have never been the best combination, and he would appreciate a second opinion.
Mu Qingfang’s voice turns hard. “Where are you? I'll come right away.”
“What—?” Yue Qingyuan stares at his phone like the blank call screen will tell him why Mu Qingfang suddenly sounds so serious. “I'm at home, but—”
“I'll be right there,” Mu Qingfang says, and hangs up.
Yue Qingyuan stares at his phone for another second, then lifts his gaze to his sparkling new aquarium. His new betta, white and black and resplendent of fin, stares back. Was his crisis of faith about his viability as a fish owner really so deserving of such urgency…?
—
“So,” Mu Qingfang says. “This was your emergency?” He looks about as unimpressed by the betta as it does by the two of them.
Yue Qingyuan feels obscurely like he’s being scolded. Mu Qingfang is one of the nicest men he knows, but that just means that his censure takes the form of a blunt instrument of mass disappointment.
“In my defense,” he points out meekly, “I didn’t say there was an emergency. Mu-xiong just assumed.”
“That’ll teach me,” Mu Qingfang huffs, but at least he looks amused. “Yue-xiong should get used to asking for help more so this gege doesn’t have to panic every time he does ask.”
Yue Qingyuan’s mouth almost drops open. He can only hope his cheeks aren’t as red as they feel. “Er—well, I asked this time, didn’t I?”
“You did,” Mu Qingfang allows, looking something horribly close to fond. Yue Qingyuan swallows and tries to hurry on.
“So—not an emergency, but I do want your opinion,” he coughs out. “I’m having… doubts. About the fish.” Mu Qingfang’s eyebrows contract. Yue Qingyuan rushes it out. “Do you think I should keep it?”
“Yue-xiong…” Mu Qingfang looks politely incredulous. “Why does my opinion matter? The fish is already yours, isn’t it? If you don’t think maintaining its upkeep will be feasible, that’s one thing, but… Surely Yue-xiong did the research before getting it?”
He doesn’t sound judgemental, but Yue Qingyuan feels his cheeks warm. “I did, but I wasn’t planning on getting a fish; I was only admiring the tanks. There was a salesperson who was… very insistent.”
Mu Qingfang regards him doubtfully, which is fair. Yue Qingyuan towers over most people he meets, and his bulk only further adds to the impression of immovability. It’s only when he opens his mouth that it becomes clear how spineless he actually is.
Yue Qingyuan falters. “I had thought… I thought it might be nice.” The bettas had seemed so majestic in their tanks, iridescent monarchs of false grass and plastic coves, and Yue Qingyuan had thought, wildly, that one might be rewarding to keep, might breathe a touch of life into his immaculately sleek living room. The whole affair hadn’t even been expensive by his shiny new standards, forget difficult to physically arrange. It was only when installation and set-up for his new aquarium had finished and he was left to watch that jewel-bright being swim disaffectedly through its new home that doubt had seized him, all-consuming and black. He had, admittedly, panicked a little after that.
(Yue Qingyuan’s apartment is very large, and very clean, and very empty. It holds the barest amount of decoration and muss to qualify as lived-in rather than a snapshot from a magazine ad. The fish may, in fact, be the only thing in the entire place which really qualifies as his. No wonder Yue Qingyuan wanted to jettison it from his life as soon as he got it.)
Mu Qingfang’s expression hovers between concern and simple confusion. “I’m sure Yue-xiong will be a more than adequate caretaker,” he says, more gently than Yue Qingyuan and all his neuroses probably deserve. “What’s this really about, Yue-xiong?”
Ah. There it is. Being the mildest person of Yue Qingyuan’s admittedly sharp-tongued social circle doesn’t preclude Mu Qingfang’s wit from being as keen as the scalpels he works with.
“I don’t…” Yue Qingyuan falters. How to express to Mu Qingfang how manifestly unfit Yue Qingyuan is to care for any living creature at all? He changes tack. “I think he hates me,” he admits dolefully.
Mu Qingfang stares at him for a long time, long enough to imply that he’s reevaluating certain opinions about Yue Qingyuan’s intelligence. “Yue-xiong, with all due respect to your new pet—it’s a fish.”
“Fish have emotions!” Yue Qingyuan argues. He flushes at the volume at which it comes out, and at the way Mu Qingfang’s eyes go wide-eyed in startlement. But the salesperson had been very insistent about that, as well. “Bettas are intelligent animals. They dislike certain colors, apparently, and they’re very sensitive—ah, to environmental disruptions, that is. And—”
Mu Qingfang’s eyebrows are still high, but his face has relaxed into a smile. “It sounds to me like you like it quite a bit already. Isn’t that reason enough to keep it?” His tone curls with sudden mischief. “Have heart, Yue-xiong—you’ve hardly known each other for a day! Give it time to adjust to you, and I’m sure you’ll win it over as surely as you do everyone else.” And he grins, sure and easy in his trust that Yue Qingyuan won’t fumble and shatter something so small and monumental as a life that he could cup in his palms.
While Yue Qingyuan is still dazed by that, Mu Qingfang’s eyes alight with interest. “Ah, Yue-xiong—what have you named it?”
“...”
Mu Qingfang’s face falls as devastatingly as it had lit up. “Yue-xiong…”
“Mu-xiong is aware that I was unsure of whether or not I’d keep him!” Yue Qingyuan is terribly aware that his ears are now heating up to match his cheeks. Mu Qingfang’s ensuing laughter does not help with that matter.
Yue Qingyuan is not very good at holding onto things. More often than not, he makes a mess of whatever he’s set his clumsy hands to, lets it fall right through his scarred fingers. But Mu Qingfang’s words ring through his head: Isn’t that reason enough to keep it? And, well, isn’t it? Surely Yue Qingyuan is adult enough to follow through on this. Maybe happiness can be look like his new betta swimming up to the tank to observe the new colorful form moving in front of it, can come as easy as Mu Qingfang quipping that his knowledge about fish is clearly lacking and vowing casually to read up on bettas to be a better fish uncle.
Yue Qingyuan buries a smile and walks over to let Mu Qingfang know that bettas can be trained to follow fingers around. The betta’s clear preference for Mu Qingfang over Yue Qingyuan is as good a marker of intelligence as any fun fact the pet shop worker could have given him. Yes, Yue Qingyuan thinks with a smile—he thinks he’ll be keeping this after all.
#yqy in canon: i make impulsive decisions of a scale where they torpedo my entire life#me: got it. in a modern au he makes expensive impulse purchases and then returns them immediately after#bc he can't conceptualize doing things for himself and also has no idea how to spend all his money he doesn't know what to do with#(this is suchh a vague modern au lmao like mqf is obv still a doctor#but i didn't write yqy as his boss here and am not sure what he does in this world or why he's rich now#and i have no idea who the fucking pet shop salesperson was either. i think it's sqh though)#don't worry about it okay? just enjoy the yuefang and the fruits of my and nik's agenda to make all our fave sect leaders fish owners#i personally see mqf as older than yqy! in this au he thinks he could be really into yqy#but he respects that yqy doesn't seem to be looking for a relationship (and that he has some shit going on that he hasn't seen fit to share#with mqf yet)#so he's content to stick to some mild flirting while enjoying their friendship#meanwhile yqy is totally divorced from the concept of attraction (directed at or coming from him)#so he panics every time mqf flirts with him but has no fucking idea that that's actually what's happening on either end#they would be so good together :)) mqf is going to be such a good fish co-parent :)) this fish is going to get these two together okay :)))#the betta is a black dragon/orchid; i couldn't decide so it's up to you#writing this was kinda funny bc the fish could and probably should have been a metaphor for sj#but i wanted to write smth yqy-centric that didn't directly allude to him even once#and i succeeded!!!#the entire reason i wrote this as modern au was bc i thought of mqf calling yqy 'yue-xiong' and went insane btw#OKAY SHUTTING UP NOW. THANK YOU AGAIN ANON!!!!!#asks#anonymous#my writing#svsss#yue qingyuan#mu qingfang#yuefang#yqy tag
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For something a little different than my usual virtual photography, here's my project for the Horizon Creation Celebration hosted by @horizon-events!
I'm really happy with how it turned out - and I'm excited to see everyone else's creations! More info below the cut ↓
I had this leather bag that I found at a thrift store, but it had somebody else's monogram on the front that I never liked. I always planned to do something about it - and I thought adding the medallion from Rost's armor would be the perfect project. The stitching of the medallion required the most work by far, but I also added a little Nora-inspired feather-and-bluegleam charm to the strap.
I didn't buy any supplies for this - everything was sourced from things I'd already collected (...hoarded?) in hopes of using them in a project someday.* The medallion uses reclaimed leather from an old purse, some blue cord I'd saved from... somewhere, and red cord of similar provenance. A stiff piece of plastic from packaging serves as interior support, and a strong magnet is currently holding it to the bag. I may attach it permanently, but I didn't want to yet in case I decided to use the medallion somewhere else!
All the feathers were found on the ground - there's an obvious jay feather (Steller's jay's in my neck of the woods), a white feather (most likely from a gull) that I colored with alcohol ink, and what I believe is a pelican feather - you can barely see it behind the purple one. The cords holding the feathers were all from my stash as well.
The "bluegleam" is a quartz point colored with glass paint. I'd had an idea for sculpting and casting the bluegleam cluster Aloy wears on her Frozen Wilds armors, but I wasn't able to get a finished product I was happy with. I'm not giving up on it, though - hopefully I can manage it someday!
*Which, honestly, is a miracle. I finally used stuff in a project! See, keeping interesting things is more than just adding to clutter!
#HCC 2023#HCC#horizon creation celebration#surprise! break from virtual photography#horizon art#(not really art more like craft but I already have that tag so...)#it's really too bad the other idea i had for the bluegleam didn't work#i spent so much time sanding lol#if i had a vacuum chamber/pressure pot setup i think i would have succeeded#but i don't#i could also break it into parts and make several molds#but time was running out and the medallion was the real focus of the project so i put it aside#it was my first time doing a fandom event like this!#life has been a bit exhausting lately so there were some challenges#but it was fun and i'm glad i did it!
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ce que j'ai fair ce soir-là
ce qu'elle a dit ce soir-là
réalisant mon espoir
je me lance vers la gloire
Psycho Killer - Talking Heads
#on my knees begging people to remember he was willing to kill and almost succeeded twice#he ended up having a moral crisis about it#but he didn't think he had a choice#I've been sick so I've watched the Sonic 06 cutscenes at least twice while I've been stuck at home#I'm so ill about this guy#also I don't speak French I'm sorry if I got anything wrong#!!!!!#my art#silver the hedgehog#sonic the hedgehog#sth fanart#sth
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"It is too easy to dismiss [Leonor of Navarre] as an overambitious schemer who would do anything to obtain a crown, shedding the blood of her own siblings and her subjects in order to attain the throne. However, a deeper investigation of her long lieutenancy and ephemeral reign shows a woman who fought tenaciously to preserve her place but also worked tirelessly to administer a realm which was crippled by internal conflict and the center of the political schemes of France, Aragon, and Castile. She tried to broker peace, fight off those who opposed her, repair the wounds caused by conflict, protect the sovereignty of the realm, and keep the wheels of governance turning. Leonor was not always successful in achieving all of these aims but given the background of conflict and the lack of cooperation she received from all of her family members, bar her loyal husband, it is a huge achievement that she survived to wear the crown at all. Many writers have argued that Leonor deserved the troubled lieutenancy, personal tragedies, an ephemeral reign, and a blackened reputation, basing their assumption that she committed a crime that cannot be [conclusively] proven. However, a more fitting description of her would be that of a resolute ruler who successfully overcame a multitude of challenges in order to survive in a difficult political landscape and gain a hard-fought throne.”
-Elena Woodacre, "Leonor of Navarre: The Price of Ambition", Queenship, Gender and Reputation in the Medieval and Early Modern West, 1060-1600 (Edited by Zita Eva Rohr and Lisa Benz)
#historicwomendaily#leonor of navarre#15th century#Navarrese history#my post#I mean...the crime can't be explicitly 'proven' but Leonor DID have the means motive and opportunity; she had the most to gain;#the timing was incredibly convenient for her; and most contemporaries believed she was responsible.#She *did* ultimately act against her brother [Carlos] and sister [Blanca]#Though of course the fact remains that:#1) The final responsibility lies with Juan the Faithless: he was the King; the one in power; and the one who rejected Navarre's succession#Blanca herself - while criticizing Leonor and Gaston - placed the ultimate blame on their father as her 'principal...destructor'#All three siblings were reacting to an unconventional disruption in the system caused by Juan & their actions should be judged accordingly.#2) I am hesitant to believe accusations of 'poison' as a cause of murder given how that was commonly used to slander controversial women#and given how it contributed to the dichotomy of Blanca as a tragic beautiful heroine and Leonor as her scheming ambitious sister#3) Even if Leonor DID commit the crime (imo she was at the very least complicit in it) she is still worthy of a reassessment.#I don't think it's fair for it to define her entire identity#Because it certainly did not define her life - she lived for decades before and would live for decades after#It was on the whole one of the many series of obstacles and challenges she had to face before she succeeded in ascending the throne.#The fact that she died so soon after IS ironic but it is in equal parts tragic. And we don't know what Leonor herself felt about it:#Did she think it was a hollow victory? Or did she feel nothing but satisfaction that she died as the Queen of Navarre? We'll never know.#Whatever the case: given her circumstances the fact that she survived to wear the crown itself was an achievement#It's funny because Woodacre parallels Leonor to Richard III in terms of 'blackened' reputations for 'unproven' (...sure) crimes#(thankfully she admits Richard has been long-rehabilitated; what she doesn't bring herself to admit is that he's now over-glorified)#But I don't think this parallel works at all for the exact reasons she uses to try and reassess Leonor#Namely: Richard was the one in power. He was the King. The ultimate blame for what happened to his nephews was his own.#and moreover: Richard's actions against the Princes DID define his reign and were exactly what provoked opposition to his rule.#Any so-called 'rehabilitation' that doesn't recognize and emphasize this is worthless#also if we want to get specific: the Princes were literal children who did nothing and were deposed in times of peace.#Carlos and Blanca were adults with agency and armies and Leonor's actions against them took place in the middle of a civil war#So ultimately I think Leonor's case is fundamentally very different and I don't think her comparison holds well at all
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going to try making stuffed peppers without an oven at 11:15pm. my smartest move yet I think
#also don't habe breadcrumbs so I'm trying to make those in a pan#and Mostly succeeding i think#thoughts
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Albus CoS: Hm... I don't have many DADA teacher options this year... I can't ask the Ministry to supply someone, they suck - and I can't ask the Governors to pick someone, they're headed by Malfoy...
Well, I suppose could spin Gilderoy into a good learning experience for Harry: After his burst of fame last year I worry he might grow a big head, like I did after my first year. I can't teach him that lesson... it must be scared out of him early so it doesn't fester.
Gilderoy makes Severus look exceptionally good, which is necessary. It will teach Harry which adults he can trust, since he struggled with that so much last year... I wish he would trust me but I can't force that. I must give him space and try to foster it slowly. Besides, it's for the best if I don't start to care for the boy on a personal level. That has never ended well.
I'll keep my distance, but make sure to tell him he can share anything with me, that he is a good boy I support - and that help will always come to him if he asks for it. To talk to the teachers he trusts. To know that he is supported even if I am not here. That should do. He wishes to be a little independent... but last time I let that independence truly flourish in a boy it went quite badly. This time I will put more pressure upon relying on others.
-- He comes back to the school to find out Harry didn't seek any adult help - planned to get Minerva's help but TURNED TO GILDEROY INSTEAD, Went off on his own to face certain death WITH GILDEROY AS A PRISONER All because he had a feeling 'he was the only one who could' Then, right after this traumatic experience, still covered in blood and slime - he wants to go and do something cheeky to Lucius Malfoy - a man that outranks Albus in most ways -- Albus outwardly: "Well I'm glad it all went well in the end. Now don't take too long and forget about the feast, alright?"
Albus inwardly: Holy shit this kid is so fucking cool. How does he do it? How does he defy every expectation I have? How does he do the opposite of what I think is best and thoroughly prove me wrong? FUCK he's cool. He's like me :^) But BETTER than me. WOW. He doesn't even have that big a head about it. Astounding.
...He really needs a role model who can show him love, he isn't learning this 'please for gods sake trust adults sometimes' lesson - I gotta take the risk and go find Remus for next year...
#people have this idea of Albus that he plans everything always#Because he does - he does plan everything always#but it quite rarely all goes to plan - especially when Harry is involved.#Albus is plotting and manipulative and clever but he is also more often than not thrown into the deep end by shit going wrong#just because he plots and plans and is usually on some level correct doesn't mean he succeeds in his manipulations#CoS is a good showing of that - where he was quite powerless and pretty much everything he did went completely wrong.#Did he have a single success that year...? No I don't think so - I think everything he tried didn't hold.#Harry really just went and succeeded all by himself#and part of that is that Albus has key misunderstandings of who harry is - he is projecting himself onto him and making poor assumptions#because he doesnt know harry is is scared to know him - scared to love him#so what does he do next year? 'Remus please harry really needs someone who will love him and I cant do it please please please come'#hp#albus dumbledore#chamber of secrets#harry potter
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when you think about it clive and flora are actually perfect narrative foils on complete accident. like what's up with that. professor layton and the completely imagined literary devices
#what did they talk about when they were alone for that one segment of uf . . . humming#i'm sure this post has been made before by someone more eloquent but i don't shut up. ❤️❤️❤️#it's like the fact that they both lose their parents at a young age#both are succeeded by a large fortune#both are incredibly insurmountably lonely in a way they are not equipped to deal with#both develop poor coping mechanisms (though one notably more poor than the other . . . el oh el)#both develop a one-sided codependence on layton (or rather. more like the Idea of him. the concept he represents)#they also both spend a lot of screentime poorly disguised god bless ❤️#flora just seems to shrink inward while clive. Well#flora is seemingly willing to accept any type of mistreatment so long as she's told she won't be left alone again#whether because she can't bear the alternative or if she genuinely believes them every time is debatable#she's fine with being temporarily abandoned because she is used to it. as long as she's kept around some of the time she's fine#but clive internalizes every slight and files it away in some increasingly grandiose and frankly childish revenge fantasy#on a small handful of people that HAVE wronged him and a couple hundred thousand that never will#everything he sees is taken as proof of a worldview he doesn't even seem to necessarily hold himself#that at the end of the day is simply a manifestation of a seeping debilitating loneliness#they both have people that care for them. but not really in the type of way they need or want#i have more to say but . . . alas. not intelligent enough for it#my point: both of these characters ard the same coincidence? i think not. Transgender;#t#professor layton
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messing around with styles at work :]
also this because he is my specialest guy
#neon brush brings me joy#also i attempted a kinda lineless style for this one?#i don't know that i succeeded but i think he's pretty so#:3c#undertale#utdr#sans#sans undertale#undertale fanart#oh yeah and um.#don't look at the bg pls#ty <33#my art :]
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Noah saying, "I don't think Mike likes Will back" doesn’t equate to him not knowing about byler being endgame, and here's why.
Noah and a majority of the main cast have been given a rough idea of how the show will end, broadly in terms of the entire story, but also more specifically in terms of their personal character arcs.
Actors are out here acting. This is nothing new.
Any of the the main cast insisting they have no idea how the show ends at all, are lying. This is because their safest bet is playing dumb.
There's nothing safe about them revealing they know how the show ends, least of all to an audience that is dying for any spoiler they can get their hands on. It just puts them in a position to have to think very carefully about everything they say, which is something they already have to do regardless.
It's a lot easier to just say you don't know, because then you can give vague answers or even just flat out lie and get away with it, as opposed to saying you know and then having everyone take whatever you say as gospel since you admitted to knowing what's coming.
David is pretty much the only actor who goes around explicitly saying that he knows how the show ends, which is something he's been doing consistently since s2 premiered back in November of 2017.
Something David has also mentioned on a few occasions since then, is how much input the Duffer's let him put into his character. He's literally praised them for having a collaborative process, because it allows him to play Hopper more authentically.
And so yes, I do think it's safe to assume that the Duffer's extend this approach to their other cast-members as well, at least among the main cast-members. I do not at all think this is some exclusive treatment only David gets, because this seems like more just something the Duffer's do out of respect to the actors. How else can they expect them to portray their character accurately if they don't know what they're going through or what their motives are or what's right for them going forward?
We obviously won't know all the details about who knew what at what times or how long they've known certain things, until they themselves come out and reveal after the fact, if they even do it at all.
Still, I do think that when it comes to byler actually happening, it's going to be very satisfying for fans who saw it coming.
This is because we're dealing with something the Duffer's are predicting a good portion of the ga will be bitter about, with the main argument at the forefront being that Mike and Will came out of nowhere.
And so, how do you think they're going to combat that?
With the literal proof.
They have David, who has been used happily as their main scapegoat through the years, whose words are literal proof that things were planned for quite some time. We have him saying all the way back in 2017 that there are easter eggs in the first season which we won't understand until the end, how it's beautiful and surprising and it will explain why certain characters acted certain ways...
Not only that, but there's just no way people are going to be able to use the whole 'it came out of nowhere' argument (at least without looking like idiots), because we'll have the Duffer's themselves out here confirming shit like blue meets yellow in the west and other theories that were entirely intentional (as we predicted).
And because of this, I think I can guess roughly how things will go moving forward and it's honestly already panning out in some ways I expected.
Because while season 4 ends in a way that seems to be leading towards Mike and El ending up together from the perspective of the ga, there are numerous details in the subtext and just outright in the literal text that's trying to tell us this is not actually the case.
And so now the Duffers and everyone who knows are in this limbo of tricking their audience in plain sight, hoping to keep this act going for as long as they can, and that's obviously not easy to do.
What I think makes it most difficult is that they want to surprise fans, but they also want them to be satisfied and happy with the ending.
And that is why the whole Milkvan straight bait is indeed very near its end.
If they want ST to live on as a cult classic with rewatch value, they can't keep this straight bait going on into the last season.
They'll want Mike and El to definitively give off platonic elmike for s5, with byler being endgame and Willel being wonder twins.
This is why Mike and El's dynamic HAS to blatant in a way that will come across as platonic to the ga in s5. And the shift needs to be immediate, otherwise byler will not be satisfying.
I feel like a lot of bylers already predict this, which is why a lot of us assume that the milkvan breakup with happen (or be acknowledged as having already happened) as early as 5x01 or 5x02.
Honestly, I do think that Will's painting being plastered on merch recently was one of the big moments which is representative of a shift we're already seeing start to happen. We're going to continue to see milkvan be promoted as elmike, while byler is being promoted in a way that is, well byler.
What I think is most noteworthy in terms of how they're approaching this conflict going forward, is how the actors themselves have talked about it when asked.
For example, there was one Con specifically that I remember Noah attended right around when Vol 2 dropped, where he mentioned byler at least 3 times. Two times when asked and one other time unprompted.
And no one ever talks about this, but full serious you guys, it was dead silent at that con whenever he mentioned byler. There were maybe a few hoots and claps, with Noah literally looking kind of worried. It was obvious he noticed the silence the first time it got brought up, and so he felt the need to mention it a second time when asked about what he shipped and then AGAIN, with a note of defensiveness in his voice:
"Byler is just, at it's peak right now, okay, so definitely ship that--"
And while in the background, all you hear is maybe 2 bylers supporting him, otherwise, it's mostly crickets...
Let's try to remember that while Byler is a lot bigger now undoubtedly, unless you're active online, most of the ga does not see it coming. And so byler is by no means fan-service. If anything it's show-runner service.
This means Noah had literally no obligation that day to go all out with referring to byler in a positive hopeful light, nor does he still. And yet he did and he hasn't slowed down much since.
His approach makes sense. Because his character has been revealed in canon to be in love with the other, he can freely say he ships it and even take the opportunity to hype it up in an attempt to open peoples minds to it, who might not have considered it before. And he can also do this because in canon, Will assumes Mike doesn't love him back, so Noah can just co-opt Will & the ga's assumption that Mike doesn't feel the same, and get away with it, without anyone whose close-minded giving it a second glance as evidence.
If they wanted to avoid queer-bait and get people to not look at byler that way, they had the chance to. A majority of the ga didn't read byler romantically and so they could've just kept things casual by not bringing it up, nor humoring it at all.
The byler tag didn't even hit 30k followers until AFTER vol. 2 dropped! Most people were oblivious (including bylers).
Undoubtedly, Noah in particular around that time, was a big part of why people started to look deeper on their own and it's how a lot of people ended up here, now with 277k of us.
Like seriously, listen to me ya'll, Noah would NOT put himself in a position to broadcast his support for byler like this and the Duffers would probably be begging him not to, knowing he would be subject to a lot of criticism in doing so, if byler was not in fact where the story was going. Point blank, period.
His tweet "vol 2 got me shipping byler over everything' has to have been the most obvious stunt of all. He was not saying that to be quirky or to appease a few thousand people, he was saying it to wake up the hundreds of thousands that might be open to it, and who just need a push to see what's right in front of them.
Then we have Millie's approach. Her approach for a long time has been to say stuff that she thinks the audience wants to hear, that being anything pro-milkvan. And up until Vol 1, she was still mostly on board with referring to it in a super positive light.
She also insisted during s4's run that she has no clue how the show will end (lies, Millie is a good actress pls give her more credit), and this also explains why she's tended to feel somewhat comfortable lying about milkvan positively...
Though as Vol. 2 neared and ever since, a shift has started to happen, where in interviews Millie is getting a lot more into depth and real about El's personal arc. She mentioned right before Vol 2 dropped that El was insecure in her fight with Mike at the start of the season because she thought he only considered her a superhero and didn't see her as more than that.... Then more recently she has doubled down saying that she is her own superhero, having been shaped a little too much by the men in her life.
SHE IS OUT HERE SAYING WHAT WE'VE BEEN SAYING FOR MONTHS (SOME YEARS)! SHE KNOWS HER CHARACTER BETTER THAN ANYONE!
Honestly, even though I understand they are trying to trick people into thinking they're clueless and so I guess I'm happy for them that they've succeeded in that, I can't help but admit I feel a little disappointed upon hearing some bylers say that they are convinced Millie doesn't know, but that Finn does and even Noah does, but that she's entirely in the dark about it and that they're okay with this I guess?
First of all, why would anyone be okay with that? Why would we be okay with Millie not having insight into where her character is going. What, do you guys think they're just going to pull up on her at the last minute like, "yeah sorry we didn't tell you sooner, but this is where your character is going to end up. anyways back to byler!...."
I don't care, it would seriously be fucked up to keep her in the dark about this because El IS important to the story and Millie, just like everyone else, deserves that closure so that she can understand her character better and therefore perform to the best of her ability. She also deserves a say somewhat in where she feels her character should go, just like David has said the Duffer's afford them.
Now lastly, when it comes to Finn, I think most assume at least he is aware of byler, and I do agree he knows, so let's start there.
Again, we don't know when they found out and so for now I don't feel like going too far into guessing the exact point and so I won't. However, I do think that Finn also as of late has had an approach that manages to somehow be very different from both Noah and Millie's, and for reasons that also make a lot of sense.
Because Finn's character is assumed to not return Will's feelings, he has to be more careful than all of them. This is arguably why he goes to the least cons out of everyone (most recently everyone attended a con in person, with Millie present over zoom even, but no Finn or Noah... seems very intentional at this point).
Why I think they need to be more strict with Finn in particular is because he's in the exact opposite situation as Noah.
His character is assumed to not return Wll's feelings, and so he can't go very far with what he reveals. What we've got up to this point is actually quite revealing enough as it is, which is why that's all we're getting for now.
What I find interesting is that Finn's approach is quite similar to David's. I know Noah is known for spoiling things, but arguably Finn is just as bad, he's just a lot more sneaky about it. He has a harder time lying, which is why I think he actually looks uncomfortable when asked milkvan questions. Not necessarily because he doesn't ship it like lots of bylers assume, but because he's having to dance around and lie outright and he probably feels bad.
His most common approach though is that he likes to make jokes and say things that could be looked at from multiple perspectives, where it could be looked at now as milkvan evidence, while simultaneously being looked at from the future as byler evidence. Him saying 'I think everyone knows how Mike feels about Eleven' was him quite literally gaslighting the audience just like Mike did with El in s4:
'I care for you so much" "I say it" "You know how I feel about you--"
But do we? Do we really? Or does the audience THINK they know, and so Finn can get away with saying something cryptic and vague like that? When really, in the future, everyone will be laughing looking back because to Finn and all the cast, it was actually abundantly obvious Mike's feelings for El were platonic and his feelings for Will were romantic.
Same for his response when asked if El and Mike would be together and happy in season 5. He dances around it, doesn't deny it, but also doesn't confirm it. Instead of just being like yes they will (which is what we're being led to assume is inevitable at the end of s4, and so he has no reason to dance around it), he starts by deflecting, talking broadly in terms of the stories overall ending, only to say he hopes they find happiness... Again his answer fits with the ga's assumptions now, but it also fits with the surprise of byler in the end as well.
Also important to note that Finn and Noah are the ones to repost about the show most out of everyone from the main cast. A LOT. In fact, they were the only main cast-members (besides Brett LOL) out of everyone to repost about the episode title name for 5x01 being released on ST day...
And it's because THIS is their character's big revelation going into the final season and they had a say in it going this direction. Even if it's what the Duffer's wanted all along, they still gave them and everyone to an extent, a say in things. And now that it's all slowly happening, they are front and center standing by that decision, because they insisted they could do it and wanted to.
I can't say for certain that things will just be smooth sailing from here on out though, by no means is everything just going to shift completely.
There is still undoubtedly this element of the Duffer's and everyone wanting to have the pleasure of tricking the audience. In an industry where everything that happens is usually expected and predictable and therefore rarely exciting, and with an audience that is always figuring stuff out before their supposed to through leaks and stuff, byler is something they have finally been able to successfully trick most of the audience to think will never happen. And that is fucking impressive when considering the heaps of evidence.
And yet still, they don't want to be yet another show that is considered to have a bad ending.
So, going forward, I think things will continue the way that they are, but we'll slowly see them be more comfortable in this element of acknowledging endgame in a way that will be easy to look back on positively when everything is all said and done.
Because if byler is endgame, IF they want people to look back and go oh Oh OH during all those moments where they misread things, but now they can see the other side of it, there needs to be more of an approach that gives Byler equal playing field and allows the ga to actually start to appreciate it and even want it and root for it. Which means buh bye predictability and heteronormativity and hello surprises and gayness (but also be open ended about it so the homophobes will stay tuned until the last second).
#stranger things#byler#rambles#stranger things 5#st5 headcanon#even though i think it's weird so many bylers are convinced everyone in the cast is clueless#i don't blame yall#that's what they want everyone to think#and they're mostly succeeding#i'm not going to go too hard in messing up their approach here#bc this is how they want it to go down#believe what you want#regardless i would hope that considering the hate that is going to follow#they're going to feel obligated to state the obvious and admit that bylers were right#either they'll be honest about everything and lay it all out there#or they'll be vague and tell people to look into it themselves#idk if they're going to go the cryptic approach#but i seriously doubt it seeing as they're the type to hold a master class explaining their thought process#and also literally give out entire white boards revealing the entire inspiration of their series#so like... i know bylers are stressed and tired and annoyed being called delusional#but trust me i think it will be worth it in the end#you will be vindicated and validated
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#nandermo#wwdits#nandor the relentless#guillermo de la cruz#pls enjoy my thirsty art#im posting the black and white version under the cut bc i can't decide which one i like best#don't read on if you dont want to read SPOILERS for s5#actually love that s5 is giving us schrödinger's guillermo#yes hes a vampire and also no hes not#i like that it wasnt nandor who turned him#but in my self-indulgent hrny little au this is how it was done ok?#whew was also really feeling the pressure to make something to rival my older nandermo piece#and i think i've succeeded :]
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We're officially 24 hours before the finale of 4 Minutes, so here are my top theories in regards to Tonkla's end: 1) He's going to kill himself. 2) He's going to call Korn, admit he shot Great over the phone and then kill himself. 3) He's going to meet with Korn, admit he shot Great, pushing Korn to his limits, which will result in Korn beating the shit out of him, which will result in Tonkla dying by Korn's hands. 4) He's going to die. By killing himself.
#I'm so sorry guys but I can't see Tonkla surviving#and I also can't see him feeling like he has anything to live for anymore?#he clearly gives negative fucks about Win so he's surely not his lifeline#Korn will either marry Fasai to save his ass or flee to meet his parents#(Korn is actually the one character I can't think of a theory about his end at all)#(I don't even know if he'll survive I have nothing to theorize on the guy)#and no none of my theories include Tonkla killing Korn#I don't think he gives a fuck I think he just wants him to suffer like he did - by taking his brother away#and he has surely succeeded so#my biggest question though is who will be on the final shot of the show#will it be TymeGreat or will it be Tonkla?#I believe the former my mum believes the latter#place your bets#too many thoughts to contain in the tags see you tomorrow people#4 minutes#tonkla 4 minutes#meta post
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