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#but he was a bad father and a bad husband who needs fuckin therapy and a kick to the nuts
moonflower91 · 2 years
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Would viserys ever feel guilty about what he did to Saerah? Cause I feel like he would but in the end would stand by his decision
He did. He really really did, and I think part of him knew he'd regret it because he does love his children, but the insult to Rhaenyra and her sons could not be tolerated by anyone. And if he cannot punish his daughter the same way he could punish others, he had to be harsh.
Years after Saerah was sent away, the doubt really began to set in. Rhaenyra was gone, his grandsons gone, his brother gone, and so the sting of the insult began to fade. And Viserys missed his youngest daughter very much, especially as his body began to fail him.
He started thinking perhaps it was enough just to send her away, that maybe ending the potential of her marrying Aemond was too much, that barring her from Vexxa was too much. (He dealt out 3 punishments--send her away and take Vexxa and Aemond from her grasp).
He began to think that keeping the possibility of betrothal to Aemond alive, Saerah would have a legitimate reason to come back without condoning what she'd said about Rhaenyra's sons.
Viserys loved Rhaenyra above all his other children. He favored her, supported her, and ignored the evidence stacked against her. Viserys would feel guilty, but he would never have actually allowed Saerah back into KL without thinking his time was drawing near to the end.
But, with Saerah's final, embittered words to him the night he died, he wished he had.
I feel that Viserys thinks his greatest tragedy was Aemma dying and he lingered on that, was haunted by it, and clung to Rhaenyra at the cost of his other children and his second wife.
But the real tragedy here was how much potential love was lost between his first and second families because of bitterness and favoritism.
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borom1r · 2 months
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I am as always late to the ask game (time zones smh) BUT
Headcanons about Marlott’s Bedlam years?
Also for Marlott, it always makes me laugh in season 1 how he let Flora sleep in his bed and just. Never took it back. Eventually set up a wee cot in the other room because presumably Old Scarred Ill Man + Uncomfortable Chair is Not a good combination. But man was having bat fucking insane dreams/visions that whole time and I’m like. Did Flora ever see the nightmares? How did she feel about all this? She never felt unsafe there (up until the end) but she must have witnessed SOMETHING.
And one for Aramir because I woke up feeling like a Trash Can Man: in your general whump Situation (illness or injury or both), which one is the worse patient? XD
I think like obviously Flora HAD to have seen his nightmares + I think she just kinda let him have his space about it?? like he’s not going to trouble her with the nightmares of an old man, least of all when she’s got her own trauma. like I can’t imagine she was sleeping particularly well at first either, so I do kind of imagine she’d go wake him up if she could tell the dream was particularly bad. then at least they can sit together instead of being miserable alone. share some 2am post-nightmare tea in tired silence.. she’s probably fallen back asleep leaning against him before (and the realization that like. oh. he’s inadvertently wound up with a surrogate daughter, hasn’t he? and she trusts him enough to fall asleep around him. oooooo that would hit Hard)
+ Bedlam years…… good question actually?? like Hervey has him institutionalized + visits the cell after John escapes but iirc the doctor implied John got dropped off and Hervey never fuckin came back to visit which is. like MAY have been a lie bc he was talkin to Nightingale but considering Hervey’s miraculous return to society, I don’t think so? which means John was completely alone, catatonic, for however many years. undergoing electroshock therapy and like. who knows what else.
and it’s like. he could escape. 1) he was plenty aware of his surroundings with Hervey, enough to kill a man and orchestrate his escape there and 2) he’s fully strong enough to rip chains out of the wall. he could’ve escaped earlier. so the question I think really comes down to what triggered his catatonia? bc Hervey is not a particularly kind or forgiving man, and his weird obsessive god complex “I could never let you die” shtick seems to develop (mostly) in season 2 after John escapes. I.E. when John begins to exceed his expectations. bc Hervey was fully content with the idea of dumping John in a cell to rot for eternity. Another failed experiment stored away + forgotten in pursuit of bigger, better things
(th god complex IS there in season 1 but again, as soon as John “fails” in his eyes, tries to escape, any feigned care/concern is Gone)
+ with the catatonia thing, 1) was it a response to the treatments in bedlam to protect himself by dissociating his mind from his body. or, was it 2) sth triggered by however the hell Hervey reacted when he found and recaptured John. because he certainly was not happy, and Hervey is notttt above harming those who disappoint him (he’s certainly not above harming those he claims to care about either, though more in the manipulative mental sense).
HM. Boromir for sure. Aragorn was raised in Rivendell, his foster father is a renowned healer, like he may Complain about it but he knows when he needs to take it easy.
Boromir would HATEEEEE being sick most of all bc at least an injury is like. a tangible external thing? sickness he would try to power through until he collapses or sth. Aragorn sitting next to his husband in bed, tending to him after he tried to take care of some papers and passed out at his desk like “you are a nightmare. do I need to lock you in our rooms to make you rest???” (Boromir fully threatens to climb out a window before being hit by the worst coughing fit ever).
I think an injury, he’s more willing to rest bc if he fucks up the healing process it may permanently affect his ability to move/fight (depending on where/how severe ofc— he will fully just Ignore a minor injury and go about his day. as long as it doesn’t get infected he’s fiiiiiiiiineee)
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prismcaster · 3 years
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I just had the most amazing experience!!!
I am going to do a little back story here, because it has been quite a while since my last post...
So, my grandfather, who was the the only person in my entire 35 years of existence that I never felt the need to question if he really loved me. Any way, super long story, shortened because I don’t feel like getting into that right now, he passed away three months ago.
In the time since then, i began to question my choice of kicking spiritualism from my life. You see, since my father, i chose that purposefully, because calling him dad would insinuate that he ever truly gave a fuck about me, or my sister.... but anyway, he used and still probably does, use his religion as an excuse to punish his children for doing him wrong.... which is typical narcissistic behavior.
Which speaking of, i recently read a book called Narcissistic Father, and it literally explained him to me perfectly! It actually made the fact that he has something wrong with him mentally, make me feel so much better about myself somehow.... because well, it turns out, it really is his fault, and none of it is mine. So definitely check out that book!
So since I have all these odd feelings for him because of these things... I cast “religion” out of my life completely. I figured, religion had to be fake, because no religion would keep a parent from their child, so i cast it out 100%. It was so bad, i began to believe that when you die, you just go. I believed that when you go, there is nothing, it just ends, and that your body decomposes, giving it back to the earth you were born from, and that is that.
Then the depression came in. Because there is nothing. Nothing else. And if I couldn’t have my family back, the way i thought it should be, and that at the end of all this pain, there truly is nothing, then what is the point in being in pain forever? And contemplated suicide while laying in the floor in my art studio in complete darkness.
But i thought,” that’s stupid, you didn’t die from cancer and you’re thinking about this right now?! What the fuck, you idiot!” And i got up off the floor, switched the light back on, wiped the tears from my eye’s, and started to draw again. This eventually led to me cutting my arm open, and telling someone months later, and finally getting the help i needed to be able to get better.
Therapy was such a blessing. I truly recommend it. Talking about your problems with someone you are literally paying to listen to you, and paying to keep their opinions to themselves, is a blessing in and of itself. I also strongly suggest journaling. When ever i felt bad, i would write to myself... it helped me explain what i was feeling to myself so that i could finally start to process what was actually happening in my mind so that I could start to slowly solve my own problems.
As i did this, a strange sense of accomplishment came over me suddenly, as i realized that the saying is true, you have to create your own happiness, and also, that you have to love yourself if you ever hope to love anyone else.
So i kept working on myself, and one day, my sister mentioned to me that she had picked up a ouija board at a garage sale. Immediately, for some reason, i said, let’s do it! And we called our other sisters, and planned our first seance. The four of us went all out. We put white candles everywhere , took it very seriously, and experienced the magic of ouija for the first time.
Now, it took a while of hitting dead ends which what we were communicating with, but one day, the mother lode of insane things happened! My cousin came through the board, and after confirming neither of us were moving the planchette, and that this truly was who they said they were, i realized that the end isn’t really the end, but that there really is more, and my life started to change more and more.
I eventually decided that since I didn’t enjoy coloring any more, that I should make a coloring book instead, that way other people can color my art work, and make it their own.
Then, in the midst of this, I decided that I wanted to make my own ouija board, but not call it a ouija board.... so the google searches began.
My sister and I started a podcast, and i used that as an excuse to do an episode on the ouija board, as an excellent excuse to do deep dive research on the boards themselves.
Using this info, I knew I needed to make a spirit board, so I started to work on drawing a design, while also trying to figure out how to make it.
One day I realized “hey, i could make this design up on my ipad and turn the background off, and turn this into a png file, and cut it out with your cricut!”
So i immediately set to work on that, while still trying to figure out how to make them. Finally one day, i discussed this idea with my husband, and he suggested resin on wood. And so it began.
So far, i have made around 30 or maybe more, boards, and yet, i still do not have my own! Maybe some day! Anyway, so that was done and in progress, I left my job that was sucking me dry physically and emotionally, started pushing myself harder, was finally trying to live my life for me, instead of trying to live it the way i thought my father would have wanted me to.
I was truly happy.
And then my grandpa left us.
I collapsed hard. But I had to try to keep it together at the same time because my grandma needed me... my mom needed me.... and my sisters needed me. I fought it as long as i could.... but eventually i broke under the pressure, and re visited my therapist, whom I have decided I am just going to continue to see monthly just in case.
Turns out, I was handling grief the right way.... which I am sure surprised her a little, being as how she had diagnosed me with ptsd a few years prior.
Since his passing, i have not touched a board, or held a pendulum, and not because I am afraid he will talk to me.... but because I am afraid that he won’t. As a 100% Irish Catholic man, I am not sure if he would come through the board or not, although, i do think that he would think it would be funnier than hell to scare us.
I have however found something to believe in. Paganism. No judgements, no frills, just love, paganism, and I will never look back.
After I decided to “come out of the broom closet” so to speak, and openly declare that I am a magical being, things started changing fast...
I finished my coloring book, and most importantly, feel mentally healed. I can’t even begin to explain it, but I will try....
First, after grandpa’s passing, I realized I had learned a few things. For example, that you shouldn’t take those you love for granted, which is when i realized he was the only person who had shown me unconditional love my entire life, no matter what. I also learned from that, the passing of the person who took care of me like a dad, that all I was doing was punishing myself for something someone else did, and that I needed to stop. And you know why?! Religion!
The same damn thing that i tried so hard to keep out.
You see, my grandpa was a wonderful dude. In my entire existence, i never heard him say a negative word about anyone. And most notably, whenever he heard me say anything bad about anyone, he would tell me that I couldn’t change them, but I should say a prayer for them.
It was this phrase, which i had repeated to me over and over again, that now finally made sense after finally realizing the true power of religion. You see, I couldn’t change my father, but, I could change the way he effected me. So, i made a little testament outloud, i moved on.
But then i realized, that if that was the case with that, maybe I needed to be more open to the idea, of religion being legitimate. So i started some research again. But this time, as homework for the tribe I was planning to join. I researched goddesses, because If I was going to pick a deity to start working with, they had to be a strong female.
First up, came Athena. And i truly believe she has been with me, allowing me to get through all of my life’s battles, without me even knowing, for years.
I studied greek mythology in college because I was fascinated by it, and was floored by the parthenon, and the giant statue of Athena that stood inside, and even insisted on visiting the replica while in Tennessee for my sister’s birthday.
Coincidentally, it also turns out that she is the goddess if wisdom, arts, and crafts, so i knew she was the one for me.
Tonight, after my full initiation into the group, i went to the full moon ritual, and was asked some very prying questions by what I will refer to as the “mega crone” and I was forced to question a lot about my choices right then, in front of everyone, and ended up crying while explaining all of that to them , and not really all that well.
But i left there thinking that I needed to let go of the idea of needing to know everything, and just go with the flow.... knowledge is nice, but too much knowledge can have it’s downfalls as well. But also left me wondering how I ended up on this path.
So here i am, telling a long ass background story to get to the damn point!
I was feeling emotional after getting home, and decided to light a candle for my great aunt who is in the hospital, and try to meditate for a while.
Normally, when I try to meditate, I don’t feel anything, and also don’t normally see much, but It’s like I can envision it, even though I can’t actually see it... imagination! Which is something I had cast out of my life a long time ago as well.
So tonight i was ready. Whatever happened was going to happen.... and if grandpa communicated with me while i was meditating I would deal with the emotions and just go on. I turned on my favorite meditation video, and jumped right in... and it fuckin worked! I could feel the ground and see lights, it was so magical! I wish I could explain the trees!
Then, after i processed that I am magical, that I can truly take my own pains away, which set off a mini party if thoughts in my mind, i refocused, and realized that athena had actually been with me my whole life. She got me to grandpa somehow when he was living thousands of miles away, so that I could continue to see and feel what true love is. She was with me through the shit storm that was my youth... and stood with me as i learned to fight for myself, and get up.
It was right now that I realized I am truly magical.... i am loved.... i am perfect the way i am..... i am enough. And if anyone ever should stumble upon this ramble, and stuck with it until now.... know that you are all of those things too! And if you don’t agree, i hope maybe my path will inspire you to get to know yourself, and see what incredible, life changing things could be in store for you.
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rockettransman · 5 years
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Rocketman Watch #4 Thoughts
i have so many MORE thoughts can you believe it wow here we go
(i wrote these as i watched it so they’re in order im p sure)
man, his intro monologue during group therapy is just as gripping as it was when I first watched it. And the transition to the bitch is back is so fuckin good. My palms are sweating.
There’s some commentary about forgiving and loving your inner/past child, but I don’t have the words for it at this moment. In the beginning he’s staring down, confused and scowling at his child self, but at the end, he embraces him in a way his father and loved ones never did.
Was he in therapy/rehab WHILE touring and doing music? Stomping into the room in his regalia would have me believe so. I know group therapy was a medium for storytelling. Was it just signaling the very beginning of his story, because we go through different stages through his actions and clothing changes?
Lmao I imagine it must take some pretty cool parents to allow their, like, six or seven year old child to be in this movie. He said bitch so many times.
Took me a hot second to realize the orchestra he’s conducting is playing Rocket Man. The violins are so pretty. Imagine being picked to be in the orchestra on set and getting smile up at the tiny little kid who played Elton. My heart would absolutely swell seeing a little kid being so fantastic at this really intense job.
Kit Connor did amazing in his role. He’s fifteen and he’s already done so much! Imagine growing up knowing you played Elton John as a kid. Getting to work alongside him and his husband and the dozens of incredible actors. Wowie. I’d never shut up about it.
I LOVE how 12 year old Elton is playing the piano SO HARD and is trying to rock out as hard as he can while playing classical music. The boy wanna ROCK dammit.
HE GLANCED UP THE TINIEST BIT WHEN THE MAN ASKED IF ANYONE HAD A FAG (slang for cigarette)
SATURDAY NIGHTS ALRIGHT GIVES ME CONSTANT CHILLS FROM THE START TO FINISH
WOOOW SEVENTEEN YEAR OLD ELTON IS CUTE AS HEEELLLL. The hair, glasses, and front tooth gap fit Taron so well. Goddamn I hope I look like 17 year old Elton some day.
The choreography for this number is absolutely breathtaking. You have to get that many people all in sync! We followed Elton running through the crowd and AAHHH it was a lot! The athleticism! And they did it in the rain! Wow I’m blow away.
Elton is JAMMIN in the back of the stage. It’s really sweet to see his smile and enthusiasm and his brain thinking and working.
That guy in the back peed a LOT lmao
I was wondering where thank you for all of your loving came in.
Charlie Rowe plays Ray Williams, and he also plays LEO ROTH from Red Band Society!!! The first time I watched the movie, I KNEW him from somewhere, but I couldn’t place it and it was driving me nuts. Man. RBS was a big crutch during the worst lows of my ED. Had no idea he was English.
Love to see how shy Elton was as a teenager. It’s a hot ass mood. Also, those silk scarves? Ascots? idk but they’re a LOOK.
“One frothy coffee, no froth.”
The acquaintances-to-best-friends montage set to Border Song *chefs kiss*
Rock And Roll Madonna Is A Perfect Song Send Tweet
Lmao Elton is NOT phased at all when he gets accused of being gay. He’s just like. “Nah. I’m like. Not.” Not overly defensive and surprised, like I’m sure other people would be lmaooo
STUMBLING HOME DRUNK WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND IS A MILESTONE IN TEENAGEHOOD!!!!!!!
“You are a ssSSHHIIIITT HOT piano player—”
So delicate of Bernie the way he politely denied a kiss from him. It wasn’t weird or tense at all. Just a gentle “love you, but not that way. It’s okay” Some people may not be able to handle it that well even today.
Taron’s got nice thighs. That robe & underwear getup is a nice look.
Love love LOVE hearing him experiment with Your Song on the piano to find a melody that worked.
Honestly what the shit do these songs even mean. Bernie sometimes these words don’t make any sense. Don’t worry, they still slap. “See I’ve forgotten if they’re green or they’re blue” like what
AMOREENA IS A PERFECT SONG SEND TWEET
Doug flirting with Bernie makes me snort every time. “Oh, really? That’s.. cool.”
THE TROUBADOUR OUTFIT IS GOOD AS SHIT!!!!!!!!
“NO, BERNIE. YOU ARE UNDERREACTING.”
Taron was right. The overalls do make his ass look massive.
A week ago before this movie I was sick and fuckin TIRED of crocodile rock but now I can’t get enough of it. The movie transformed a lot of old songs I was sick of for me.
Imagine being a kind of shy, nervous kid, terrified to go on stage, but two and a half minutes later the entire venue is LOSING IT because they love the jam YOU WROTE. how cool for Elton.
I want a best friend platonic cheek kiss :(
Hmmmmm I’m wondering if they used the studio recordings that went on the album for the movie or have different movie-specific recordings. Tiny Dancer sounds a teeny bit different in the movie version.
Goddamn I sure hope Taron got to keep that jacket.
“So you liked the song, then?” “Not as much as the singer” *Elton glances away in gay panic*
LMFAO John said some weird colorful words to Elton that barely made sense and he was like OH FUCK GOTTA KISS HIM GOTTA KISS HIM
I’ve talked so much about the sex scene I don’t need to go on about it here. Go search the rocketman tag on my blog for my extensive gay thoughts about it.
Now I know glasses come OFF during sex
oh oh oh I was wondering where Hercules fell in the movie. I love how the songs he’s writing or getting notoriety for is played over the transition scenes.
Elton’s hand on his hip, knowing smirk as John enters the studio. “Hello.”
Bernie is like “HELLO are we RECORDING or are y’all gonna FUCK in the CLOSET?”
*vibrating* Honky Cat Honky Cat Honky Cat Honky Cat
Damn, the flowy white button down with the red pants really is a LOOK
The gestures, staring up at each other, leaning into each other, hands on each other’s chests, damn it makes me feel some typa way. Maybe their love WAS good and fun and exciting while they rode the high of everything before it all went so so bad.
Elton searching John’s gaze while he’s talking and looking like he’s not really paying attention, just looking for a kiss on the couch.. GOD I remember the honeymoon phase of my relationships. So much fun.
His dad going “N-Not really my thing.” That was a metaphor for his SEXUALITY TOO, huh.
Damn. He went to his dad’s to come out to him and he never even got to get to that part. He was just like “....nice shoes....” and even after all this time, didn’t show any interest in his music. If he never was into what he did, how could he even talk about being gay? I’m sure during that scene there were a lot of metaphors to sexuality but I didn’t bother to think much about them.
The eyebrow quirk after his dad says “ah—no. Could you make it out to Arthur?” DAMN Elton was like .. “really. This is what’s happening? Okay. Awesome.”
“What do you have to do to get a fucking drink around here, eh?” *cuts to Elton drinking straight from a bottle*
“Elton—” “Elton!”
John saying “don’t you ever put your hands on me” when he was the one who yanked him from the phone booth AND directly after punching him... woof man. What a shitty dude.
Damn, just noticed John talking very quietly and closely to another man right before he goes on and plays Pinball Wizard. Was this the first sign of him having fun with other men when Elton was indisposed?
Pinball Wizard is absolutely intense and loud and fun, but it DOES carry the tone of “god im SO miserable” under it all. You knew Elton wasn’t having fun.
“It is next week.” Jeezus.
LMAO I just caught the “mom, you’re ON my GOWN” when he reluctantly complies to give the Anderson’s a tour.
Damn, flowy, loose dress shirts with the first few buttons undone is a LOOOOK.
How did they do the overdose scene, you think? Surely the pills Taron took had to be like. Empty. Or placebo affect drugs? Idk. He did take a big drink directly after stuffing his mouth with them. I don’t think he spit them out.
God, there is SOMETHING symbolic about how he meets his child self at the bottom of the pool. Rock bottom? Apologizing? Wishing he could be better? Telling him he’ll never be better?
OH I watched a behind the scenes cut about the pool scene, and none of it was CGI. Taron was weighted under his robe and a SCUBA diver was on standby to provide oxygen. The singing and bubbles coming out of his mouth and stuff underwater was all real.
Dying to know about the choreography around the second chorus, about the undressing and twirling and dressing and injection and handing off of the bat and stuff. That sequence was incredible.
Bennie and the Jets. Damn. It fucks. I listened to it almost the entire time on my run today. (Five miles; I felt like garbage the entire time but it was good anyway.) The scene is wild. He’s in the middle of a drug induced haze orgy. He SHOULD be having the time of his life but he’s so goddamn miserable. (Also, the juxtaposition between Chris Fleming’s Bennie and the Jets is so funny.)
Part of the problem was that John never understood Elton. But, Elton broke it off with John, not the other way around like he said it was. He wasn’t the victim in that regard. John did treat him like shit though.
Victim of Love plays right after that lmao
Renate and he aren’t even close when they do the duet to don’t let the sun go down on me. They’re separated in different rooms, mirroring literally how closed off their relationship was.
The shot with them waking up in different rooms.. damn
His shirt is so LOUD I’m going crazy
Watching Taron down that orange juice made me a little nauseous I gotta say
“Not really I’m gAy”
It’s CRAZY to watch Elton and his mom interact at the dinner scene. He gets accosted and accused of so much by his mom, claiming SHE’S the victim of his actions, making it all about HER and then he turns around and does and says the exact same shit to Bernie.
He yells “Oh, don’t be so dramatic!” at Bernie as he gets into a taxi. THE PROJECTION!! THE DEFLECTION!!!!
I know there’s only so much they can put in two hours, but I wish they showed more of Elton’s eating issues. He had bulimia for sixteen years before he got help. It’s Absolutely the Man With Anorexia in me, but seeing that even men deal with eating disorders quells the lonely aching something in me. I feel that much less alone, you know. Eating disorders aren’t a “woman’s disease.”
How do you think they did his hair? A wig adds more hair, not take it away. He didn’t get his hair cut for it did he?
Seeing Elton’s first love fall apart because John was such a selfish, heartless prick in reality makes me sad.
Elton hugs his inner child when he reconciled with everyone in his past. Goddamn. He found peace and forgiveness for himself, who he was, even after all that time.
When Elton asks him not to go, Bernie refuses, saying this is something he had to do on his own. Healing comes from within alone. No one can help you do it. People can guide you, but you have to work at it. It’s fucking lonely sometimes, but it’s so, so worth it.
I used to loathe I’m Still Standing since i heard it so much at work, but the movie changed my entire perspective on it. I love the slow build up as he exits the rehab center. You don’t get thrown into something so happy and fast paced and fun after a cathartic climax you need to drink in. And the pan to his hat with the rainbow stripe to his smile. I get chills every time. Elton feels so right and secure and happy in himself. At first I thought it was a bit cheesy, but accepting your sexuality, especially after all the hell he went through during his life, grappling with unresolved trauma and fear of abandonment, he absolutely should wear it loud and proud. It’s easy to think times are much easier now being gay, and it shouldn’t be such a big deal. Relative to 1975, it is easier. But it doesn’t mean it’s not such a rough personal thing to work through if you’ve been spit on and resented all your life. Being gay, coming out, and accepting and being comfortable with that fact must’ve been such a HUGE milestone in Elton’s recovery and self-esteem.
Love me again after I’m still standing is perfect. The credits make me tear up every time. Jeez. What a good movie. What a good movie. Hit me up if you wanna talk about Rocketman because I absolutely will with you.
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briteboy · 7 years
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stealing @bratsims format because i need a less ugly way to mass answer your messages which will hopefully motivate me to stay on top of this! at least i can say i tried
so if you sent me an anon message in the past...idk MONTH (i’m bad i know) it might be here. (older ones are near the bottom) if not, check my faq because it’s probably answered there. (and if you’re the person/people who sent the twin flame & 7th house asks, i plan to answer those separately because i have a LOT to say. get ready)
game of thrones, nuclear war, real life santis, lou theories, i’m evil, HERE WE GO!! i literally had to cut it off at the last one because it was just too much for now. i’ll try to answer some more later ok
we’re starting off on a great note
Anonymous said: gaddamn rooney's tiddies lookin' hella ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
STOP!!!!!!!!!!! THAT’S MY CHILD soaidfnjds she’s supposed to have like b/c cups (goals for me tbh, the big boob life is not fun) and sims 4 pregnancies just fuckin make them...NYOOM i’m mad you can’t edit sims’ bodies during pregnancy even with cas.fulleditmode on -___- so i let her live with her giant preggo tiddies for now
Ngl I want a kiss between Santi and Gianni (I'm sorry I'm literally trash)
then i’m here to satisfy your desires: they do kiss periodically because gianni is one of those people who’s like “why shouldn’t you kiss your friends?” free love 4 everyone
IM SCREAING AT UR YOUTUBE CHANNEL OK!!!! I LOVEEE IT, WOW
DON’T IT’S UGLY EXCEPT FOR LIKE TWO VIDEOS
hey this is kinda random but i thought joe seaward from glass animals looked kinda like santi? he has quite a weird face too lmao
oMG i actually love that, i know what you mean. that dude reminds me of a bull terrier lmao i actually saw glass animals like two weeks ago!! i didn’t really get a good look at the drummer but now i wish i did. missed connection
i just finished reading santi's story and ugh it almost had me in tears! beautiful, your story telling skills and editing skills are perfection!
ahhhhsdkgkds thank you so much ;____; that means the world to me <333
Unpopular opinion: im so done with game of thrones tbh. It's not even good anymore :/ I liked the first season but since then i've skipped through episodes because they are just sooo fucking boring and dragged out!
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see like the first three seasons were pretty good because they stayed true to the books. (actually that’s a lie, littlefinger’s chaos speech in the s3 finale was real fuckin bad because guess what: it was original material LMAO) the fourth season was where it started to get messy and then the fifth season was a fucking shitshow because they completely IGNORED the fourth book and cherrypicked all the “good” parts out of it (read: the most action-y parts, while ignoring all the most important pieces of character development) and they botched the dorne storyline, oh and who could forget the iconic moment of throwing in a rape (THAT DIDN’T HAPPEN IN THE BOOKS) just for fun :) love it! but anyway if you think the show is boring i probably wouldn’t recommend the books, they’re even slower getting through them lmao. but it’s worth it in my opinion. there’s so much they don’t include in the show and it makes me Angery
Okay, game of thrones fan here, I haven't read the books (yet at least, I bought book 1) but I feel like dany is going to practically turn into her father, this season she is already showing traits like his.......
OH YEAH i definitely feel like they’re moving in that direction in the process of revealing jon as the “true” king of westeros and it’s so bad lmfao. the thing is, like...cersei is already mad king 2.0? why do we need another one?????? the entire point of dany’s arc is that she’s constantly trying to deviate AWAY from the way her father ruled, demonstrated by the fact that she freed the slaves (whereas all the targaryens before were slave owners), the fact that she’s not perpetuating the whole incest thing (LMAO GUESS AGAIN BECAUSE JONERYS HAS TO HAPPEN FOR SOME FCKING REASON), the fact that she has dragons which haven’t existed in how many years...like, if she ever ends up being like her father in the books, it’s NOT gonna fucking happen like this. but i don’t think she will anyway, george rr martin has been pretty clear about her trajectory thus far. anyway this show is so ugly, next question
rooney's eye are so BIG
just like her tiddies lmao i kno sometimes i forget how big they are and then she does one of those silly endearing animations and i’m like o ;-; hello big dumb baby cow eyes
Cows? Are you secretly Matthew Daddario?
WHO i had to google him lmao i was about to say “oh the teen wolf guy” but jk @ myself u idiot it’s shadowhunters damn i literally googled “matthew daddario cows” and
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tru
I love how fragile Lou looks like but the truth is that she is strong af and you can't play with her bruh
SHE IS ;-; and that’s a huge theme in her story, i’m excited <3
ima leave ur blog and come bk and spam you so you will finally notice me
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im part of this online forum of girls that talks about our period and weather or not one of us might be pregnant and once this girl posted saying that her husband invited his mom without telling her to thier honeymoon and she didnt find out until they arrived at the hotel and she was already there. the most recent part reminded me of it. but long story short, her dad moved all her stuff out of his house and her friend came to pick her up and they got a divorce.
OISOJDFAKNLJSD WHAT!!! i’m guessing you sent this because of that thing i said about the reddit post lmfaooo imagine your mom on your honeymoon. why. that’s soooooooooo good 4 her u know. u don’t need to be married to his mom as well
thanks 4 trusting my love santi. he's beautiful
thank u he thinks ur beautiful too 💘
do you have any tips for runing game in good quality and fast?
euhhhhh the only tips i have for you are to merge your cc, close all other programs while you play your game, maybe invest in a cooling pad uhhhhhh yeah idk any other tips you can probably find on google
You told that thing about unfollowing people and I thought you unfollowed me, but then I checked and you didn't and I'm crying omg
lmao omg ;-; i literally cut my following list in half, it was so chaotic and it was making me anxious. so if ever unfollow any of you please don’t take it personally (i know it’s a stupid thing to say, and it’s a lot easier said than done) it’s just my brain explodes when there’s too much going on at once and some content blends into others, i’m trying to only follow people who i’m genuinely interested in enough to keep up with their posts from now on
I haven't been able to sleep in over 72 hours thanks to the constant fear over the looming world war. I'm fine. Completely fine
Oh shit, have you noticed that the media has been putting out more 'what to do during a nuclear attack' kinda articles? This world is slowly going to shit, for real. I'm not even near any of the danger really, but it still absolutely terrifies me to see all of that bc it could very well go wrong and hit my place as well yknow? I have no idea why i send this to you but you seem chill and calm so thanks for reading my freakout askfjsls
YEP it’s pretty terrifying. but at the same time don’t let fear overwhelm you, fearmongering is an ugly, ugly thing and you don’t want to live your life constantly worrying. so just prepare yourself for what might come, but at the same time, just spend as much time with your loved ones as you can, do all the things you’ve ever wanted to do, and then if it doesn’t turn out as bad as we thought it would, you *tim mcgraw voice* lived like u were dyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyin’
@ Jesus anon: I really don't think it's the right time to complain about "using the lord name in vain" when there are people terrified of leaving their homes bc they are afraid to get killed (aka that poor, poor Jewish anon in charlottesville)
yeah idk like i want to respect everyone but it seemed to be in poor taste to bring that up at a time like that lmao. and also i’ve literally never in my entire life met someone who actually takes “don’t say the lord’s name in vain” seriously. 
I asked about the poses and HOLY CRAP THANK YOU SO MUCH! I finally have good poses to use for story telling. Thank you soo so so so sooooo much!
YAY i’m glad you found some good stuff <3 and honestly just going through lana’s blog you’ll find a ton of good poses, it’s a gold mine
Idk how much tv you watch, but have you've ever come across a tv show that used music from The Sim? Because once in a while I'll hear Sims 3 build/buy music on some random show and I'll get a lil shook because I find it so weird that the generic music they're using comes from a major game title.
OMG LMAO NO what i wish i’d come across that tho. one time i used sims 1 music in a video i made for school and someone recognized it
I love your stories gosh I check your page "it's everyday bro with femmesim flow" Lol sorry for that awkward Jake Paul "poop" ❤️
lmao thank u i had no idea who jake paul was until my friends started talking about him
yo, I also remember once in french class real life santi asked me what videos games I like to play. When I told him the sims, he looked at me for a while and shaked his head. He was like, "why do you want to watch your sims use the toilet?"
WHY DO YOU WANT TO WATCH YOUR SIMS USE THE TOILET SAME that’s all i care about when i play
that rooney face in the 5 facts is so iconic, its my fave picture of her. You should blow it up and frame it
i should tbh. i should print it out and put it in my wallet to show everyone because she is my child
sorry the bother you, merging cc makes your game smoother? can you explain to me please?
boop
hi i love you ♡ pass it on
I LOVE U
Can I say that hearing a MacBooks fans screaming for dear life as they try to cool down when playing the sims has actually started to haunt my nightmares
SAME my macbook is actually doing it right now for no reason. thanks laptop
Maybe Santi should go to therapy to talk out his issues.
maybe he should 🤔  but tbh he’s already talked out everything, there’s nothing really more to talk out. he just has to cope with it. he’s treated lou like his therapist thus far and that’s not okay
i love ur story and omg i totally get where lou is coming from with being tired of being compared to molly by santi, thatd hurt so much esp with how much she cares about him
thank youuu ;-; i’m glad you understand, this was a part i’d wanted to get out for a loooong time now, and i know you guys were always like “um why does she put up with this” lmao. she just loves him, that’s why. but you’re right, it does hurt.
My theory is very similar to the other anons in that Fiona's dad/Lou's ex had a mental illness (schizophrenia, depression, what have you) but he actually did kill himself and that's why she's not completely losing it on Santi because I feel like most people in that situation would have not handled it as well as Lou did
🤔 you’re right about the last part, and there’s a reason she has so much patience, das all i’m sayin
i started your story from the beginning last night and i am in awe. Its amazing. It inspired me to put a little more effort in learning to edit and write. It was like reading screen caps from a movie! I didn't want to stop reading. Anyway thing was a super sappy ask, but i appreciate your stuff. And i'm bad at putting my thoughts into words.
omg ;__________; when people tell me i inspired them it means the most to me, my brain just can’t process it lmao. so thank you so so much ;-; <333 THE MOVIE THING ESPECIALLY GOT ME IN THE HEART because i feel like that’s my aesthetic with most things i create because i’m such a film person lol. don’t worry i love super sappy, and you did a good job of wording everything because it got me right in the feels <33
Okay I've been snickering for about 43 minutes bc SANTI GOT THAT GRU CHINNN
WOT is that i googled it and the only thing that came up was the dad from despicable me lmfaosdkjfs but ok
Please, please do punk edits of your some of your characters! I'd die.
WHAT DOES THIS MEANNN do you mean like. those 2010 tumblr edits of punk disney characters and then the joker from suicide squad looked like one of them. do u want santi to be the joker. because my boyfriend already relates him to suicide squad joker because of his face tatt lmao
You love to make me cry
i do i’m sorry. if it makes you feel any better i love to make myself cry too. but my biceps grow stronger with every tear
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I reeeally dont think those chancla comments were offensive??? Why would they be?? I'm hispanic (born and raised in the sunny Dominican Republic, received a fair amount of chancletazos myself) and I laughed out loud when i read them 😂😂
I JUST WANT U TO KNOW I SHOWED @ichosim THIS MESSAGE AND SHE LAUGHED FOR 12 HOURS AT “CHANCLETAZOS”
whATT my little brothers name is santiago n we call him santi for short!! guess it's not rly that uncommon but we live in a small country and he's also 4 so like,, no other santiagos!! idk why im saying this its completely irrelevant just kinda surprised me :'))
OMG wow hell yeah another real life santi...santi acts like a 4 yr old so he might as well be your brother
Just curious.. Do you play sims or just use it for storytelling? Sorry if thats weird haha
well my recent gameplay pics should answer your question lmao. i do like to play but i don’t have enough time to both play and pose scenes so i mostly just pose scenes for now. :[ i am gonna be off work for like two weeks tho so hell yeah gameplay here i come!!
I'm starting a Fiona appreciation movement because she is the real star of santis story RT and i love her and she is way underappreciated and I love her KThxBi
SHE IS THE REAL STAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i’ve said this before but santi’s relationship with her is the most important to me, out of every relationship he has in this story. i’m so glad you love her so much, sorry about what’s about to come in the next few scenes tho
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Oh my heart, Santi is alive, god exist
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I have a pretty hard time understanding Santi's story mostly because I'm not English but I'm sure I'll figure it out:)
ahh oh no D: i’m sorry i wish i spoke every language in the world lmao. if you want, you can message me off anon and i’ll help you understand it!!
Lou is an angel honestly
“there are worse things than seeing an angel before you die”
what tablet do you use? or how do you draw hair? it looks so pretty.
omg haha i don’t have one! i wish i did tho. all of the brushes i got from deviantart, i’m trying to find the specific ones but they’re all elusive wtf. i’ll post them when i find them! for now, here’s a good guide to drawing hair, by airi <3
Nah nah I always knew you'd save him.....eheheeh.....THANK YOU FOR NOT KILLING BABBY SANTEEEEEEEEE DNDDNSKANW YOU WOULD HAVE HAD SO MUCH BLOOD ON UR HANDS AS ALL UR FOLLOWERS COLLECTIVELY DIE FROM A BROKEN HEART BUT DW WE DIDNT BECAUSE UR QN ANGEL....but I toooootally knew you'd save him... /sweats/
I’M GLAD U HAD FAITH <3 i know omfg i would’ve expected a mob at my house if i’d actually killed him. if i ever killed him i would just lay down somewhere and die. that’s it for me
Lou & molly almost always have teeth showing, do you draw them on each pic?x
no, only sometimes i’ve drawn them when i felt like their mouths weren’t matching the expression i wanted. but most of the time it’s just the pose.
is it too late to send 16k dollars to guarantee santi's inclusion in a loving home with loving friends
it is absolutely never too late to send me 16k i promise you that
I just bought school books for $550 who knew studying marine biology could be so fuckING EXPENSIVE
EWW WTF...i’ve been lucky and haven’t had to spend a ton on books in my college career (one time i even went to such lengths that i got access to free trial version of one of my school books in a pdf, screencapped EVERY SINGLE PAGE, which was more than 400 pages, just so i wouldn’t have to spend $70 on it. i love cheating the system)
waIT i never saw ur selfie where is it, must see
u could probably just search “selfie” on my blog and find it, or enjoy the ugly closeup drunk snap i posted last night
Hey guys I'm a happy trans man that has no mental illnesses. I'm fucking pissed about Trump's ban. And to any one that says it's logical FUCK YOU! I'm having flashbacks to don't ask, don't tell because this is the same fucking wacked up logic. I'm so angry, like I'm a human, yes I may require testosterone shots once a month but that's it, I even administer them to myself. I pay for them with my own god damn money so fuck you transphobic bigots who say this law is fair. It's not. WE ARE HUMAN TOO Also same anon that ranted. Sorry about that I'm just really pissed and I love and thank you for sticking up for the community. We love you and I love you. And you're right not all trans people transition. We all do what we want to. Some start on T or E and have the full surgery. Some just have top surgery. Some just do testosterone or estrogen. Some never do anything. We're all still trans and we're all valid.
YES ALL OF THIS, sorry i didn’t answer this when it was all happening. but askdkjfas thank you for this message, I LOVE YOU TOO, SO MUCH <333 and i’m glad you feel comfortable enough to voice this in my inbox. yes every trans person is valid no matter what they decide to do with their bodies <3
One of those old hot topic shirts that said " if Darryl dies we riot " but with santi instead of Darryl.
OMG LMAOOOOO NOW THAT’S A CONCEPT who’s making these i want one
your use of references and reaction pics and gifs fucken KILLS ME
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Crystal anon here. I googled around my area to find there are none of those y'know, crystal, candle, incense, magic type shops. I have panic attacks when I go outside and I wanted to look into alternative stuff since I'm on meds and w/e. I wanted to know if you or friends had any experience or recommendations for buying crystals online like on etsy or amazon. How can you tell if they're real?x
ooooh ok. usually there are shops like those in cities or even in towns with like kitschy little promenades with independent shops. (i know there’s one around the town over from mine, which is so random lmao) i do have friends that have crystals but i think they mostly just collect them for the ~good vibez~ and don’t really look too far into the healing aspects of them. i would say first go with the one that coincides with your birth because those are the ones that are like specifically catered to you and strengthen your being. as for buying online, hmmmmm i mean i don’t really know any specific trustworthy sellers because i don’t have much experience with this, but definitely read the reviews! those will help you a lot <3
Hello could you please tell us how you edited the pic of rooney in that one post that the anon asked for the unedited version?
i honestly didn’t do much of anything that differs from my usual editing process! i made her eyes a bit bigger by using the clone tool, cloning the top of her eye and applying it a little bit farther up...if that makes sense. it’s hard to explain how to use that tool lmao. and i think i used the liquify tool to bring part of her eyebrow down to look more worried.
there's still a part of me that says she ain't dead and molly is just in a coma lmao end mE
OMFLDKGKJS yeah she’s not dead surprise. i WILL say there is still flashback stuff that will be revealed. well not “revealed” like molly’s death was revealed, like i just still have to showcase some things that happened afterward. because it doesn’t just end with molly’s death, there’s stuff after that as well :~}
I'm Mexican, have lived around Mexicans, have been to Mexico multiple times growing up, just came back from a family trip at practically the border between Mexico and Guatemala and never in my life have I ever heard the word "joder" i had to look it up xD (not hating or anything I just thought I'd mention it cuz I found it funny...lol) k bye...
OK NOT SURE IF the ppl you’ve been around just don’t curse or whatever but...joder is DEFINITELY something i’ve heard mexican people say before lmao
Okay so this is random, but i was telling my sister the name of one your characters in ur story (santi) and she kinda just starts singing his name, and she said "santi high, santi low, santi go." And im just sitting there, like woah.
LMFAO WHATKNJDSKJGD “woah” same
u gonna incorporate fis hat into a really like emotional sad thing in her story huh
oMG i wasn’t planning on it but hmm 🤔
Why no el chingo? NO ME GUSTA (I'm joking btw ily)
LMFAOOOO because i didn’t wanna have to defile my son by downloading the penis mod RIP
let santi grow out dem eyebrows 2kforever
omg he does let them grow out except for the little line he shaved in when he was 14 that never grew back RIP
in ur bio it says "kt" and i know why,, it means killing them as in killing off ur characters slowly i see u gurl
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i bet this story was just an excuse for you to see the world burn. well done.
OMG i mean, that was definitely one of the side effects of it all. but really it was just that i NEEDED to get this story out after it had lived in my brain for so long.
ur dead 2 me
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I... just.... can't... too much pain Y U DO DIS 2 UZ?!?!!!
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