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all-hail-the-witcher · 4 years ago

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jaskier’s breakup album

alright full disclosure i probably went into way more detail than i needed to. but jaskiers a dramatic little shit and therefore so am i. but this album slowly became my baby and I've been listening to it for the last 2 weeks while I've been doing homework and its a good sad bop. these are just my opinions, but i think it would be cool to see what other people think (esp because im fairly new to this fandom). also this post is really long. sorry about that.

so. we all know jaskier is a bard. he traipses around writing songs about whatever fling he's having or about his witcher. netflix canon makes it pretty clear that geralt is one of jaskiers muses (and probably one of his more reliable ones given what we know about jaskiers dating history). jaskier is also very, very dramatic (as I'm sure everyone knows cause he's the damn comic relief that show desperately needs). in particular though the scene at the beginning of 1x05 where geralt is djinn hunting and jaskier stumbles upon him, drunk, singing off key, and rambles about how "the countess de stael, my muse and beauty of this world, has left me. again. rather coldly and unexpectedly, i might add. i fear i shall die a broken hearted man” and jaskier is clearly half muttering some sad attempt at a breakup song he's trying to write at the beginning of the episode so the question is, wouldn't he do the same thing post mountain scream down with geralt?

the answer is of course, yes he would because jaskier is nothing if not a dramatic little shit. and i am proposing that he writes not only one but an entire album (or set if this is canon era, but if this is canon i think he would keep a great many of these songs to himself, only playing a few select ones with the hopes that someday geralt will hear one and realize how badly he fucked up) of break songs and lamentations about geralt, because say all you want about what their relationship is, but one does not simply go traipsing around the entire continent with someone for 20 years and not grow close to them in some way shape or form (and the show makes it clear that geralt is at least one of jaskiers close friends so). now what is on this breakup album? well I'm glad you asked.

i peg jaskiers music (modern or canon honestly) for this album as being a combination of taylor swift’s folklore/evermore albums and james arthur and ill explain why.

taylor swifts folklore/evermore albums have this almost ethereal, floaty, reminiscent, indie vibes. there are many metaphors, recurring themes and its overall kinda dramatic at points which i feel is exactly what jaskier would be doing right now (it also just kinda gives me canon era vibes, idk). but james arthurs music is much more emotionally intense which i think is definitely in character for jaskier at this point because he strikes me as someone who copes with things through his music. both artists do the sings through story telling in an almost monologue manner which goes along with that kinda bardic music and all that. i also think that jaskier would want geralt to know that these songs are about him because hes dramatic like that (kinda like how taylor swift writes her stuff). anyway here's what i think would be on his breakup album:

heres a link to the playlist

1. the lakes - taylor swift 2. from me to you i hate everybody - james arthur 3. maybe - james arthur 4. sad eyes - james arthur 5. hoax - taylor swift 6. naked - james arthur 7. right where you left me - taylor swift 8. all too well - taylor swift 9. impossible - james arthur 10. exile - taylor swift 11. illicit affairs -taylor swift 12. safe inside - james arthur 13. quite miss home -james arthur 14. my tears ricochet -taylor swift 15. phoenix - james arthur 16. this is me trying - taylor swift 17. happiness - taylor swift 18. death by a thousand cuts - taylor swift 19. empty space - james arthur 20. coney island - taylor swift 21. new years day - taylor swift 22. the 1 -taylow swift

so theres 22 songs which im sure jaskier would do on purpose cause hes a dramatic little shit ( “one song for every year i wasted on you” or something of that sort). jaskier being a dramatic little shit is going to be a recurring theme. some of them work better for modern era than canon era but as a whole this can be interpreted as either romantic or platonic. anyway lets unpack.

1. the lakes by taylor swift (more canon era interpretation)

this song is the bonus and final track off of folklore. the song is actually about how she wants to go live in seclusion with her boyfriend out of the public eye but that is not what it means in this interpretation. i think that this song is about how jaskier feels as though his career as a bard is tainted now because he spent so many years singing geralts praises and there is no way he will be able to escape that part of his life because undoubtedly hes going to get requests for toss a coin and others he wrote about geralt and people will probably know him as “the witchers bard”. so this song is him talking about how he wants to run away and live out his life in seclusion because geralt took from him one of the only happinesses in his life.

Take me to the lakes, where all the poets went to die I don't belong, and my beloved, neither do you Those Windermere peaks look like a perfect place to cry I'm settin' off, but not without my muse

the line “i dont belong and my beloved neither do you” references the fact that jaskier feels like an outcast now that he’s spent years traveling around with a witcher, notoriously outcasts from society, so he feels that he doesnt belong anymore either.

I want auroras and sad prose I want to watch wisteria grow Right over my bare feet 'Cause I haven't moved in years And I want you right here

the second stanza references his idealization of living out his life in solitude, with nature, where no one can judge him (and geralt cant yell at him).

jasper would have started this album with that song because it states his intentions: he feels as though he’s done with singing. it could also refer to him leaving the public eye (in modern era) to write this album.

2. from me to you i hate everybody by james arthur (more canon era interpretation)

songs 2-4 on jaskiers album are ones that he wrote at various points while he and geralt were still together/best friends/etc. these three songs establish what the relationship was like before everything went downhill, but they are kind of melancholy, like looking back on a past love (which is what jaskier is doing). this one jaskier wrote about when they met. geralt would have heard him play it before and he would have known that this song was about him (he probably also secretly liked it and jaskier putting it on his album would have been like a slap in the face because it wasn't one that he had shared with other people, thinking it to be too personal). if this album had been released in modern era, jaskier would have released this song as a single to get geralts attention. he would have definitely wanted geralt to know that this album was about him.

I used to come here on my own and drink So I didn't have to think or hear the whispering I stand with people telling lies again In suits and ties again and I just need a friend

they meet in the tavern and its clear that jaskier is Not having a good time and really just needs a friend, hence why he decides to go talk to geralt.

You walked into the room and cut the atmosphere like a knife, alright Sobering mind 'cause up to now, I've just been wasting my time, ooh yeah

the “wasting my time” part is of particular interest because it clearly articulates that jaskier feels as though adventuring around with geralt was the best part of his life and before that he'd just been a bard with debatable songs. the song as a whole makes it sound like geralt was jaskiers lifeline.

3. maybe by james arthur (modern or canon era works)

this song, while geralt would know immediately it was about him, was not one jaskier ever shared with geralt. it would have been written a few years after he and geralt had met initially. the reason that jaskier never shared it was because it talks about destiny and geralt made it Very Clear that he does not want to fuck with destiny.

I don't know what's going on Where you came from and why you took so long All I know is that I feel it Like it's the realest thing, I mean it Something changed when I saw you Oh, my eyes can't lie You said, "They're so damn blue And I love how you're so forward Is it too soon to say I'm falling?"

this would have been what young jaskier felt over the course of a few years after traveling around (or befriending if this is modern). There was probably a slip up somewhere, or jaskier just thought that he got really good at interpreting geralts grunts and the line about the eyes is what he hoped/imagined/thought geralt was saying to him in return.

So maybe Maybe we were always meant to meet Like this was somehow destiny Like you already know Your heart will never be broken by me So is it crazy For you to tell your friends to go on home? So we can be here all alone Fall in love tonight And spend the rest of our lives as one

jaskier probably thinks that destiny is some wildly romantic thing hence why he compares them meeting to destiny. the line about heart break would have also hit especially hard after the mountain scene. also i think its pretty clear that jaskier wants to spend as much of his life traipsing around with geralt in the show (modern era wouldn't have been any different), hence wanting to spend the rest of his life with geralt.

Oh, is it too crazy For you to tell your brothers about me? They told me they'll protect you But I'll look them in the eye Tell them you and I will be as one

this is the part that sells it for me. i think that geralt lambert and eskel would all be very close (admittedly i havent read the books but i kinda get that vibe from the fandom so). this part about geralt telling his bothers about jaskier and then jaskier probably meeting them would have been an Important Moment.

4. sad eyes by james arthur (modern or canon works)

aright so im not sure if geralt has heard this one before. i can see it going both ways. its a possibility that jaskier wrote it at some point and then would kinda sing it softly when hes patching geralt up after a particularly rough hunt so its one of those where like geralts not quite sure what the song is but then he hears it on this album (cause say this was modern era and jaskier actually did release this album geralt would totally buy it after a few weeks and then realize how badly he'd actually fucked up) and is like shit thats what he was singing all along?? but anyway this one is essentially about how jaskier thinks geralt puts too much pressure on himself and all that stuff

You wear the burden World on your shoulders, babe So let me hold the weight I know you're hurting Deep as the coldest pain But this is the order sayin'

essentially jaskier can see through geralts bs and hes calling him out on it and wants him to just take care of himself for once (see: the scene in 1x05 when geralt says he cant sleep)

5. hoax by taylor swift (canon or modern works)

so this song begins the plethora of break up songs that jaskier wrote about geralt. this one would have been written some time after the incident, after jaskier has some time to reflect on the whole thing. i know that taylor wrote this song about enduring a toxic relationship, which kind of works if you think about the way that geralts treated jaskier and how jaskier interpreted it (but im not implying that their relationship was toxic or abusive or anything)

My best laid plan Your sleight of hand My barren land I am ash from your fire

jaskiers plan was to reinvent geralts image and geralt did not think that it was worth it. jaskier is just sorta his side kick (who gets him into trouble, as geralt points out) and geralt kicks him aside like he doesnt mean anything to him (like ash from a fire

Stood on the cliffside Screaming "Give me a reason" Your faithless love's the only hoax I believe in Don't want no other shade of blue But you No other sadness in the world would do

this is a little more literal with the screaming on the cliffside. jaskier wanted a reason to stay and geralt didnt want him to. jaskier knows that witchers dont feel emotions (or at least not like humans do) so hes been tricking himself into believing that geralt actually liked having him around, knowing that it was probably going to blow up in his face at some point. but he doesnt quite regret it, and doesnt want to be sad over anyone else.

6. naked by james arthur (modern or canon works)

this kind of goes along with hoax, jaskier probably wrote them around the same time. he’s admitting in this song that he would be willing to try to work it out with geralt, but geralt needs to change first (needs to actually communicate and let him in and all that stuff).

'Cause here I am, I'm givin' all I can But all you ever do is mess it up Yeah, I'm right here, I'm tryin' to make it clear That getting half of you just ain't enough

hes quoting geralts words back at him here ( “all you ever do is mess it up” is pretty similar to the line about shoveling shit), saying that all hes ever tried to do is be good and kind to geralt, but geralt hasn't really done the same in return and while jaskier may have dragged him into some things, geralt also needs to take responsibility for what hes done as well.

7. right where you left me (modern or canon works)

this starts the Real Sad Boy Hours songs. this would refer to how he felt pretty much right after, not knowing what to do because geralt had been so much a part of his life for so long:

Help, I'm still at the restaurant Still sitting in a corner I haunt Cross-legged in the dim light They say, "What a sad sight" I, I swear you could hear a hair pin drop Right when I felt the moment stop Glass shattered on the white cloth Everybody moved on, I, I stayed there Dust collected on my pinned-up hair They expected me to find somewhere Some perspective, but I sat and stared

this is kind of the processing of the event. and also the moment on the album where the audience would realize that this relationship that he's been telling about until now definitely ended. this song isn't super super emotional, its more a jumble of thoughts cause he didnt know what to feel after the breakup happened. although he didnt write it right after the break up, it was written much after as a looking back.

8. all too well by taylor swift (modern or canon era works)

(the link to this one is from a live performance because i like the emotion in this one better) so this song is not off of folklore (its off of red) but its such a powerful, painful breakup song that i had to include it in the lineup because it seems like something that jaskier would have written very very soon after the incident. the memories especially that she touches on in the song (driving upstate, dancing in the fridge light, looking at the photo album, etc) are all very powerful and real and i can see jaskier doing the same thing. again, if this were modern era i think that he might release this one as a single. theres so much to unpack in this song, this ones gonna be a little longer oops.

Maybe we got lost in translation, maybe I asked for too much But maybe this thing was a masterpiece 'til you tore it all up Running scared, I was there, I remember it all too well

this clearly references the mountain scene. they were a pretty good duo until geralt blamed him for all his problems. and jaskier was effectively stuck on the top of a very dangerous mountain that he would have had to navigate down by himself.

Time won't fly, it's like I'm paralyzed by it I'd like to be my old self again, but I'm still trying to find it After plaid shirt days and nights when you made me your own Now you mail back my things and I walk home alone

jaskier spent half of his life following geralt around, its likely that he doesnt know what to do with himself or his life now that he doesnt have geralt to follow around on adventures. he doesnt know what to do anymore (see the first song).

But you keep my old scarf from that very first week 'Cause it reminds you of innocence and it smells like me You can't get rid of it, 'cause you remember it all too well, yeah

this is more of a hope that jaskier has. he hopes that geralts held onto something of his that he left behind. maybe he left a shirt in one of roaches saddle bags (canon) or a notebook in their apartment (modern) that geralt just cant seem to get rid of. he would like to think that he had an impact on geralts life and that it wasn't just all for nothing. in the beginning, he wants geralt to be just as hurt as he is.

'Cause there we are again, when I loved you so Back before you lost the one real thing you've ever known It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too well

this is a dig at geralt. he'd never had someone to follow him around on adventures before, much less a human. as far as we know it seems like jaskiers the first human that has even given him the time of day. this is jaskiers way of throwing it back in geralts face

9. impossible by james arthur (canon or modern works)

this would have also been written very soon after the incident. it is more jaskier being mad at himself for not seeing the signs than him being mad at geralt. it is almost like his admittance of the event and like hes finally accepting what happened.

I remember years ago Someone told me I should take Caution when it comes to love, I did And you were strong and I was not My illusion, my mistake I was careless, I forgot, I did

jaskier is someone who clearly falls in love (or at least screws around with people) easily so its likely that someone would have given him some advice along these lines once. but when he met geralt its likely that this caution went to the wind.

When all is done, there is nothing to say And if you're done with embarrassing me On your own you can go ahead, tell them

Tell them all I know now Shout it from the rooftops Write it on the skyline All we had is gone now Tell them I was happy And my heart is broken All my scars are open Tell them what I hoped would be impossible

this hints at the first song on the album. jaskier has no stomach for singing for audiences asking to hear about the adventures of geralt of rivia. this is his way of telling geralt that, almost as his punishment, he should have to deal with the people who ask why hes not traveling with his bard anymore, because jaskier has no intention of doing so. this is pretty brutal because (as we know) geralt doesnt really enjoy talking about feelings, or talking at all in general.

10. exile by taylor swift (modern or canon era works)

this is a fictitious conversation that jaskier wrote as occurring between him and geralt. it can be looked at either way but i think it makes more sense if bon iver is jaskier and taylor is geralt.

I think I've seen this film before And I didn't like the ending You're not my homeland anymore So what am I defendin' now? You were my town Now I'm in exile seein' you out I think I've seen this film before

this first chorus is from jaskiers perspective. note the use of “homeland,” as home becomes a theme on jaskiers album. in geralts version of the chorus the line instead is “youre not my problem anymore” which is probably what jaskier took the whole mountain thing to mean.

All this time We always walked a very thin line You didn't even hear me out (you didn't even hear me out) You never gave a warning sign (I gave so many signs) All this time I never learned to read your mind (never learned to read my mind) I couldn't turn things around (you never turned things around) 'Cause you never gave a warning sign (I gave so many signs)

(the () in this are geralt) this is jaskiers lamentations about how he didnt notice geralts abject discomfort in their relationship and also his regrets in not being able to remedy the situation.

11. illicit affairs by taylor swift (modern or canon works)

so this song is clearly and obviously about an affair. however, i have seen interpretations of the song where people view it as being in a relationship that is so intense and well hidden that in a sense it is almost like an affair, like in the aftermath you’re not even sure if it was real or you deemed it because there isnt really a trace of this other person anymore, and that is the way i think jaskier would have written this song.

And you wanna scream Don't call me kid Don't call me baby Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me You showed me colors you know I can't see with anyone else

the dont call me kid, dont call me baby part would reference jaskiers humanity, he has a normal human lifespan at least in canon (very much unlike geralt) so geralt might brush him off as being young and stupid. jaskier would have made this album to show geralt that hes not being young and stupid, that this did screw him up, and hes suffering cause of it. kind of like a reality check or a slap in the face.

Don't call me kid Don't call me baby Look at this idiotic fool that you made me You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else And you know damn well For you I would ruin myself A million little times

the secret language would of course refer to geralt himself. hes a hard man to understand (especially cause half his vocabulary is grunts) and hes also a witcher. so jasper had to learn to understand him and now he has no use for that anymore. and the ending line about ruining myself. that would be jaskiers admittance that he would do it again, he'd do it all again, which comes back up in later songs.

12. safe inside by james arthur (canon era interpretation)

this is one that jaskier would have written maybe a week or so after the incident. the song itself deals with distance and coping with not being in someones life anymore, and i think that that is something that jaskier would struggle to cope with because hes not sure he wants geralt to be alone. this song is more for jaskier than for geralt.

Everyone has to find their own way And I'm sure things will work out okay I wish that was the truth All we know is the sun will rise Thank your lucky stars that you're alive It's a beautiful life

obviously geralt can take care of himself, but its kinda clear that he doesnt much like his life as a witcher (the part where he talks about them getting slow and killed). so this is kind of jaskiers way of almost reminding geralt that his life on the path is still beautiful and important now that he back by himself.

Oh, will you call me to tell me you're alright? 'Cause I worry about you the whole night Don't repeat my mistakes, I won't sleep 'til you're safe inside If you're home I just hope that you're sober Is it time to let go now you're older? Don't leave me this way, I won't sleep 'til you're safe inside

this is more jaskier worrying about geralt being by himself. he hopes that hes okay in the aftermath of this this and that hes taking care of himself still. because of course jaskier would write a whole breakup album but still write one song about how he hopes the person is doing well.

13. quite miss home by james arthur (modern era interpretation)

this song. oh my god. its so amazing. if you dont listen to any of these, at least listen to this one (actually im pretty sure no ones read to this point so if you have thanks). this song is kind of more along the same vein as the previous one, how jaskier misses geralt but its more for him than geralt. he would have probably written it at like 3am in a fit of tears and weakness, and debated long and hard about whether or not to put it on the album, but done it anyway because what does he have to lose? theres a lot to unpack here tho so this is going to be a longer one. (sorry)

I'm in the kitchen while you smoke outside You're careful not to let the smoke inside I always tell you it's poison But I know it helps you take the edge off the day We get a drink before it's closing time The one on high street with the blinking sign All these memories feel poignant I won't be there to see the snow melt away

this is a very very clear picture of an event that seems to have happened a great many times, so much so that it seems like second nature. its like a little glimpse into what their life was before this incident. its intimate, but it still is melancholy.

Whoa I'm in another city I got nobody with me And it just really hit me

this is where jaskier is now, it provides some opposition. its like a culture shock almost, like hes so used to this intimate lifestyle with another person that its jarring to be by himself.

That I quite miss home And I miss you telling me To leave my shoes at the door 'Cause you just swept the floor And the dirt drives you crazy Yeah, I quite miss home 'Cause it feels like poetry When the rain falls down on the window While you're in my arms And we're watching the TV Yeah, I quite miss home

the key here is what jaskier is referring to as “home.” it's not the place, its geralt himself. all these memories center around him, not an establishment. (calling geralt “home” comes back in later songs.) again, this mosh of memories is like theres so many of them that its almost overwhelming but its stemming from jaskiers need to feel something other than lonely and hes craving this reality that hes lost.

14. my tears ricochet by taylor swift (modern or canon era works)

this is a song that really emphasizes jaskiers dramatic little shit tendencies. this is something that he wrote, trying to predict what geralts reaction would be if he found out that jaskier died. this is really just jaskier fantasizing that geralt didnt actually mean any of what he said and does still care about him. theres many lines in here that are jabs at geralt (if I'm dead to you why are you at the wake? and Even on my worst day Did I deserve, babe All the hell you gave me?), but i think this is the most important one:

And I can go anywhere I want Anywhere I want Just not home And you can aim for my heart, go for blood But you would still miss me in your bones And I still talk to you When I'm screaming at the sky And when you can't sleep at night You hear my stolen lullabies

this is again, jaskier referring to geralt as home. as seen in the last song, he clearly wants to go there, but he cant. this could also refer to where he grew up, which he cant go to either because his parents still view him as a disappointment (as seen in finally). jaskier saying he still talks to geralt is completely in character, he probably still curses him and the whole thing. but the part about geralt not being able to sleep at night and hearing his stolen lullabies is really hard hitting. jaskier likes to think that geralt wouldn't be able to sleep without his banter or his lute playing or something of that nature. over all its a very powerful song.

15. phoenix by james arthur (modern or canon works)

this is a fictitious apology that jaskier wrote from geralts pov, kind of what he wished that geralt would say, but knows that he won't.

Let me, let me begin Let me begin, with an I.O.U Who I owe everything to Lately, lately my friend Lately, you think I'm ignoring you But I've been trying to pull through All of the pain, I know you're looking down, down on me I could have been someone I hurt everyone Pushed away everyone who got near

in this “geralt” outlines what he did wrong, and that he didnt mea what he said at all. again, this is more for jaskiers benefit because he knows that even if geralt were to apologize to him, it wouldn't be to this extent.

16. this is me trying by taylor swift (modern or canon works)

this is jaskier trying to articulate the fact that hes trying to pick himself back up after everything, his way of showing his “healing process” and that he can do it, he doesnt need geralt (as the song shows, its not going very well)

And it's hard to be at a party When I feel like an open wound It's hard to be anywhere these days When all I want is you You're a flashback in a film reel On the one screen in my town And I just wanted you to know That this is me trying (maybe I don't quite know what to say) I just wanted you to know That this is me trying

its showing that jaskier is having trouble enjoying things that he once did (like parties) because hes still so distraught over what happened with geralt, but at the same time he also wants to show geralt that he doesnt need him. it has a very i dont care kind of attitude, but jaskier at the same time is having a hard time showing geralt that hes doing okay, hence the “maybe i dont quite know what to say” which is out of character for the very talkative bard

17. happiness by taylor swift (modern or canon works)

this is more him convincing himself that things will be okay. he's clearly trying at this point to move on, but its proving difficult because geralt was his happiness for so long:

There'll be happiness after you But there was happiness because of you Both of these things can be true There is happiness

he also repeats the line “havent me the new me yet” a few times, which i think is again him trying to convince himself that its going to get better and he will move on from it. but this line is the one that i think hurts the most:

No one teaches you what to do When a good man hurts you And you know you hurt him too

this implies that 1. he still thinks geralts a good man (not a monster) and 2. that he knows he hurt him to and doesn't know how to fix either of them. this is also kind of him giving up on how to fix it, but him recognizing they were both at fault is important for the arc of the story.

18. death by a thousand cuts by taylor swift (modern or canon works)

this is another song that is not off of folklore (its from lover), but i wanted to include it because it think it has a little bit of anger to it (especially in this live acoustic version that i linked) which i think that jaskier would feel a few weeks post incident in a fit of rage, like why am i still feeling this way? why did you think that this was okay?? and its right after happiness, which shows that his healing really isn't linear. there's many lines in this song that pertain to geralt and jaskier and i could talk about the whole thing but im not going to

But if the story's over, why am I still writing pages?

this i think is very jaskier. its so raw and like, i know this is over, why am i still writing about it? why am i making an album about this? why should this still matter to me? its very angry and again, like many of the songs, like a slap.

My heart, my hips, my body, my love Tryna find a part of me that you didn't touch Gave up on me like I was a bad drug Now I'm searching for signs in a haunted club Our songs, our films, united, we stand Our country, guess it was a lawless land Quiet my fears with the touch of your hand Paper cut stings from our paper-thin plans My time, my wine, my spirit, my trust Tryna find a part of me you didn't take up Gave you so much, but it wasn't enough But I'll be alright, it's just a thousand cuts

this part, especially if you listen to her sing it, (which i would HIGHLY RECOMMEND BTW) is very passive aggressive and the the last line is like quite sarcastic and downplays it, like, yes you put me through all of this, but i guess its *just* a thousand cuts. this really shows that in many ways geralt was a part of jaskiers life, and his sudden removal from it would have stung in many ways, and thats not something that you can get over quickly.

19. empty space by james arthur (modern or canon era works)

this song starts the beginning of jaskier getting over geralt. these last 4 songs would have been written much after the incident, after hes had time to think, but there's still this nagging in the back of his head thats like, well what if im being stupid and he is the one and im supposed to go back?

I don't see you You're not in every window I look through And I don't miss you You're not in every single thing I do I don't think we're meant to be And you are not the missing piece I won't hear it Whenever anybody says your name And I won't feel it Even when I'm burstin' into flames I don't regret the day I left I don't believe that I was blessed I'm probably lyin' to myself again

this is more what jaskier wants to be, not what he actually is. he thinks that hes over geralt, but hes not (the chorus gets into it more but im not going to talk about it here, but it essentially says “only you can fill this empty space”) clearly jaskier is further along in his healing process, but hes still having second thoughts. he wants to be over him, but he knows hes lying to himself, very deep down.

20. coney island by taylor swift (more modern era interpretation)

this is the true moving on song. it’s still laced with memories and speculation, but it puts clear distance between the two of them, much more so than empty space does because it lacks the longing. it just shows things for what they are.

And I'm sitting on a bench in Coney Island Wondering where did my baby go? The fast times, the bright lights, the merry go Sorry for not making you my centerfold

its apologetic, but nothing more than that. it dwells more on what could have been rather than what he wants it to still be.

The question pounds my head What's a lifetime of achievement If I pushed you to the edge? But you were too polite to leave me And do you miss the rogue Who coaxed you into paradise and left you there? Will you forgive my soul When you're too wise to trust me and too old to care?

this is interesting because it addresses their immortality and how they've been together for years and also the way in which they left things (paradise). but it also implies that things were on the downfall. and the last two lines about forgiveness is interesting because it then calls geralt “too wise to trust me and too old to care” meaning its more a wish of jaskiers rather than something he knows geralt will do.

Were you waiting at our old spot In the tree line By the gold clock Did I leave you hanging every single day? Were you standing in the hallway With a big cake, happy birthday Did I paint your bluest skies the darkest grey? A universe away And when I got into the accident The sight that flashed before me was your face But when I walked up to the podium, I think that I forgot to say your name

these are all very specific, very intimate moments that would clearly mean something to geralt. and it further implies that jaskier is uncertain if he actually made geralt feel appreciated when they were together. but again, its more what could have been rather than what jaskier wanted it to be, which is a nice segway into the last two songs.

21. new years day by taylor swift (modern era interpretation)

this is another one not from folklore, this song is the closing track on reputation, but i like the nostalgia of it so i decided to include it (and it also has good parallels to the last song). initially jaskier intended for this to be the last song on the album, but decided to add another one last minute (and we will get into why). this song is more jaskiers muted longing to still be with geralt, albeit in the far future.

There's glitter on the floor after the party Girls carrying their shoes down in the lobby Candle wax and Polaroids on the hardwood floor You and me from the night before but Don't read the last page But I stay when you're lost and I'm scared and you're turning away I want your midnights But I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day

this interpretation is very much like the actual songs interpretation: the desire to stay with someone through the unexciting parts of life, like cleaning up after a party on new years day. additionally, wanting to start something new with someone (being there with them past the midnight kiss and actually starting the first day of the year with them). additionally though, there is the line of “dont read the last page” which refers to the last song on the album, which we will get to.

Hold on to the memories, they will hold on to you And I will hold on to you Please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh I could recognize anywhere

this is more jaskiers reality. hes torn between holding onto these memories and hopes and actually facing reality. he wants to hold on to geralt, but he also kinda wants to move on. and the last line about the laugh, thats more jaskiers own hope, he hopes that he will come across geralt again and things will work themselves out.

22. the 1 by taylor swift (modern era interpretation)

the decision to make this song the last one on the album was a very last minute decision, and it was written significantly after the rest of the songs. the reason for this was without this last song, the album ends on a note of hope “Please don't ever become a stranger whose laugh I could recognize anywhere” but this last song is more of a reality check and acknowledgment that what's done is done and that it will never be again.

I'm doing good, I'm on some new shit Been saying "Yes" instead of "No" I thought I saw you at the bus stop, I didn't though

this refers to the fact that its been some time since the whole thing and jaskiers kind of changed a little bit. he claims hes doing good, and maybe is going to try out a new career (since the first song references wanting to put music down for awhile). seeing geralt at the bus stop is a reference to cardigan where he says “chasing shadows in the grocery line” where hes not actively looking for geralt anymore and it doesnt upset him that he didnt see him.

I guess you never know, never know And if you wanted me, you really should've showed And if you never bleed, you're never gonna grow And it's alright now

this is jaskier saying that hes almost glad that it happened because it gave him a new perspective and it was a learning experience. he also says that its alright, which is the second time that hes said hes okay, which probably means he isnt completely, but hes much closer than he was on the rest of the album because hes not still looking for geralt at every turn

I have this dream you're doing cool shit Having adventures on your own You meet some woman on the Internet and take her home We never painted by the numbers, baby But we were making it count You know the greatest loves of all time are over now I guess you never know, never know And it's another day, waking up alone

this is jaskier acknowledging the fact that geralt has probably long since moved on with his life, either with other romantic people or with his life entirely (the first time he does this on the album). he says that while their love or friendship was unconventional it still was definitely something (implying that it may have been one of the greatest loves of his life). and the waking up alone part references quite miss home and being by himself, but it isnt sad, its just a fact at this point.

But we were something, don't you think so? Roaring twenties, tossing pennies in the pool And if my wishes came true It would've been you In my defense, I have none For never leaving well enough alone But it would've been fun If you would've been the one

this is the part where we see that jaskier has grown. hes recognized that his wanting to be with geralt was never anything more than a fleeting wish or a moment that couldn't last. but he knows that it had potential and it could have worked but it didnt and thats okay. in the last chorus the pennies line is “rosé flowing with your chosen family” which implies that he and geralt were close enough to know each others family (chosen or real), meaning that it meant something. and he wouldn't have minded a long term relationship with geralt, but its not what happened.

in new years day jaskier says “dont read the last page” this song is that last page. part of him still doesnt want geralt to know that hes put aside the hope of it working because he wants to still keep himself open for geralt, but knows that its not healthy and ultimately he needs to move on. hes essentially giving geralt the choice: remember jaskier as wanting to get back with him (since the last line of the album would have been “please dont ever become a stranger who's laugh i could recognize anywhere” or let him have the knowledge that jaskier is done with him (since the official last line of the album is “but it would have been fun if you would've been the one”)

anyway thats jaskiers breakup album. i put way too much effort into this. and if you actually read through the whole thing, thank you and please let me know what you think!! if you use this for fics or have your own interpretations please please tag me, id love to see!!

#the witcher #geralt of rivia #geralt #jaskier #julian alfred pankratz #geraskier #wow this took so long #literally so long #id recommend listening to the songs tho theyre all kinda vibey #there's like a million songs i could have used but i liked these ones cause i think they have a very nostalgic vibe #also dont get me wrong jaskier would also eventually release some sones like uhh #truth hurts by lizzo #like very fuck you breakup songs #but this is him being sad first #anyway im literally only posting this cause witcher anon said they wanted to read it #i hope you like it my dude

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adonis-koo · 5 years ago

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Missy :( I cant send you messages anymore. Anyway. I read Tease 16. Had to reread it tn bc of how negatively it affected me. Imma sum up some stuff. I. Diego with MC: fucking kill me 2. JK saying he loved MC when with Eva, Win. But strangle hold on his past -WHAT? Also in admitting MC love, I hope JK doesnt get hurt with his revelation. Also, his off limit thing? Intimate kissing? 3. MAIN THING: MC was anally raped by Diego. (More to come)

+ Why is JK not more affected? She was in that ordeal for at least 10 minutes while continuously crying out and sharing her pleads and safe words just for it to stop hurting. Does JKs head just not go that far? I feel people arent looking into it as much. All im picturing is myself crying while im anally raped and how horrific the pain and experience are. I KNOW MC is feeling the same. But it feels so swept under the rug. Could you just help me please make sense of the anal rape in this story

First and foremost I really am sorry this chapter affected you so negatively baby, it’s a lot of heavy subjects! During the draft I actually wrote out MCs smut scenes (albeit they weren’t depicted as harshly as this), and I decided to not as it just made me uncomfortable thinking about it in this context. Please feel free to skip any scenes that trigger anything unpleasant love! 🖤

Now as for Jungkook not being heavily affected- or at least showing it. Truthfully, I didn’t intentionally plan this but the more I look at his story as a whole, it makes sense that while this is upsetting, in a way, Jungkook is rather desensitized. I can’t go into details for multiple reasons pertaining to the plot but let’s just say he’s desensitized to sexual harassment as a whole. Is it upsetting?

Absolutely, but when Jungkook gets upset, he gets upset. And if it’s over something he’s powerless over, Jungkook would rather give what physically and emotional energy he has left after his own long night to comforting MC, as you said, she’s had a horrific night and she needs his support, rather then possibly stress her out further with threats of killing Diego Jungkook chooses to spend what’s left of his energy comforting her as best he can. So in a way, yes, Jungkook doesn’t think that far, because the moment he does is the moment he’ll lose his cool.

If you’re asking me to make sense on why I put it in the story; I don’t really have an intricate reason. The thing about assault, dub/non con or rape is that in real life, Theres rarely ever a reason it happens. It just happens and it’s disgusting. Part of the reason I chose this to happen was to really emphasize the reality of what they as strippers are dealing with at Seasonella and MC isn’t an exception, that this isnt okay. That, if MC didn’t have reason before to want Seasonella to get shut down she sure as hell does now. Again, this doesn’t really serve any purpose. I never want to use something like dub con or rape as a plot device in my fics. These are real traumas that many people struggle with.

As I’ve said in previous asks, the line of consent is heavily blurred in her implied scene with Diego, she definitely didn’t consent to it, but she never told Diego no. She very easily could’ve, but somewhere inside her brain, she chose to just grit her teeth and deal with it. She never gave him a safe word to use if things became to much. Maybe it was the shock? Some people feel like it was just her stupidity. Who knows. Some even consider it rape. It’s up to the readers interpretation of the scene. But I will say; this will definitely leave some sort of trauma with MC.

Maybe it doesn’t affect her everyday life, maybe she can still easily have sex with Jungkook. But it’s still there, it’ll still haunt her in those silent moments in the dark. It was excruciatingly painful and that’s something she’ll never forget. Seasonella is an arc that was intended to shine a darker reality on sex workers lives, for this story at least. It’s not all fun and games. People get hurt, people get assaulted. While I wrote this arc for other reasons this was one of many.

#missy answers #tease #alpharyth

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zaneryne · 4 years ago

Text

Ghost Part 3

Chogan had been at sea with Zane, for now, a day, and watched over her, thumbing over a necklace. He finally asked her about it, "You keep thumbing over that necklace, does it mean something?"

She still masked as a Tauren looks over to Chogan and then down at the necklace, sadness welled up in her eyes, "Yes....my...lover gave it to me."

Chogan cants his head to the side, "You say that with sadness, are they dead?"

She rubbed the chess piece and ring around in her hands and looks up and shakes her head, "No he is not dead...but it is complicated...."

Chogan, the youthful Tauren seemed confused by her words, shaking his head, "Love is never complicated, my mother and father said...how is it complicated?"

Zane looks or the porthole of the ship and says, "This war...Alliance versus Horde....he is a human, and me a Sin'Dorei....we both have obligations, even if I would love to run from it all....and now with being hunted, the person hunting me will kill him and my sister just to hurt me....so yeah it is complicated...I am running to save them...."

Chogan adjusts his sitting position, "This does not sound so complicated, you are strong, the tales of you say this....you cannot stop this thing that hunts you?"

Zane shakes her head, "It is a lot more complicated then just the story I tell....the man that is hunting me....he is yes just one man, but he is powerful and knows several people, one man sure I could take on, but an army...no.I rather me be alone, and the ones I love be safe and protected and happy....that makes me happy...."

Chogan sighs, her story sounded sad, it sounds lonely, he twist his bow in his hand trying to figure out how to say it and then just spoke of the story of his parents, "During the great fall, when Deathwing ripped our world apart, my clan was separated, you were helping half of the people with my father, this was away from my mother and me, but my father never stop looking for us, and we never stop looking for him, and we had many hurdles, where yes it sometimes seems easier to give up then stay looking. But we never stop fighting for what we wanted. We wanted a family, and we fought for this." Zane tried to stop him and he kept going on with such a muster, "My father see much evil in this world, he told me then the world fell apart, some did put difference aside but most still saw two sides, and now he said the world screaming and bleeding and we still cannot see past these bad words Alliance and Horde, he said at end of day we are people, there is no side, we are neutral and we get issue from both sides, but that never stop us from fighting for family....so if these people..." he stands up from the crates he sat on and gave his chest a pelt, "worth fighting for you, stand and fight, you should not run and hide, because the issue no go away, they still be here even if you hide from them. They stand more a chance with you then without."

Zane was speechless. She just blinked at the Tauren, he swatted towards her as she said nothing and went outside the hull to the deck. Zane left there thinking again and again of her sister, and Jon. Wherever the two were she thought of them in the moment.

All the while Norae'thas stood at the foot of the cliffs he fell at, looking at the water Zane had to of fallen into and ahead towards the Barrens, and growls, "Where did you go little ghost...." he thought of the past, them together once more.

They stood in Silvermoon City, near the marketplace in one of the several inns, Zane hair braided back and sitting around a collection of vials and bowls of water, he had spent the better part of her setting up flicking water at her and she swatting scrolls at him bickering at him to stop, she finally ranted out, "Stop it Norae'thas I am serious this time! I am onto something huge! That could change the school of frost magic and we could be the ones that found it...."

She would have been the one that found it, he admired she wanted to credit him, he nodded off, "Well it is your research, not mine, but flattered you would include me, okay, I shall stop, what is it you want to show me today?"

Zane nods and points to the water and then to him, "What if you recall this from water? Sort of like a vision of sorts?"

He looked at the pool of water and then at Zane, "And how would you do that exactly? Sounds ambitious...."

Zane nodded her head several times, and cupped her hands around one of the bowls of water, "Very....but started to think of how the magic works, think of a fossil or a track, something imprints or in case of a fossil dies and leaves an imprint of itself on the ground, anyone can come up and see the paw print or the body in the ground, but that is just visual, as seeing this bowl or bottle, that is one dimension of seeing, but what if...you could see the story of the object...throught the means of magic? When as frost mage uses frost magic, they understand frost magic as a whole, when a fire mage uses fire magic they understand fire magic as a whole, they don't go and respect the other elements, so to see a imprint of something in for example the ground, you should have to use a school of magic to show the imprint, but have to understand the magic that allow it to exist....so a fossil was once life or nature, and now lies in the ground, so earth, everything...all magics are in unison and we have to respect them as entities almost...."

Norae'thas yawns, "This all sounds very shamanistic Zaneryne, but okay, how would it recall a memory?" And what if you do not understand each school of magic?"

She rambled a bit, "Well if you wish to be a mage you should honestly learn all magics to be the best mage....but yes, the how....well....um...." she turns and grabs what looked by the bag a dusty bag of dirt for sure, and poured some of the loose dirt into the bowl, "I will show you, will imprint my hand in the dirt and then replay the memory of that....you see...nothing doesnt expel no kind of energy or magic, when a fossil became a fossil, they died, something ended a life, so nature expelled into the ground allow the imprint, when a mage throws a fire ball to hit something but misses, the fireball was not intended to hit the tree or the ground, there was a story in that spell, and we are all connected to Azeroth everything we do leaves an imprint...." she went on with her poetic connections to Azeroth and the schools of magic, she spoke of Nature's balance, the shamantistic look and then schools of magic, how she had all the time to research this all was beyond his comprehension. He just noticed she went on and on about how she was about to imprint this memory and play it back, he yawned at how boring it was about to be to see this explanation twice, as she set her hand in the bowl, printing herself to the earth and water, she started to imprint her memory. He changed her originally planned memory by stepping closer to her.

She nervously looked up and said, "What are you doing Norae'thas? Do not mess with my experiment ok...."

He curls his index finger under her chin and pushes her to look up at him, she bewildered, as he leans in and kisses her quite softly on the lips, like pure electricity that it went through her body feeling the first kiss between them. She slowly peeled her fingers from the dirt to rest the wet hand on her lips as she pulled away, and held her bottom lip, blushing wildly. Norae'thas chuckled, "That must be a much better memory then whatever boring one you were about to create."

Zane blushed beet red and just swatted him, "Don't just kiss me to make a better show or memory! Tha....that was not for real?"

Norae'thas tilts his head to the side, "The kiss? No that was very real...." he boops her nose, "Now show me the memory magic so I can ravish you further Zaneryne...."

She goes silent, only to blush further and turns, stuttering a bit, "I...I am not sure we will be doing anything like that here...t.his is public area...." She swallows hard and hovers her hand over the muddy water bowl, "I will now cast pure frost energy into the bowl, fill the cracks, the details of the handprint and make the memory come to be....sort of command it to tell me....if that makes sense...." she rested her fingers into the bowl and started to channel frost magic into the bowl. The ice crawled fitting each inch of the bowl, the dirt, in the very water an image, an illusion cast in the bowl, show the first kiss again, replaying for the two of them.

Norae'thas was instantly aroused by this, this woman was discovering a new school of magic, and they would both be credited for his, he pressed his body to hers, wrapping his arms around her, "You will have to show me how you did that....."

Norae'thas now stood at the waters that Zane had fallen into, and follows the path, stopping at what looked like an old blood stain, he knelt near it, "You should have never shown me how to do that...." he dabs his fingers in the blood, his grin twisted in satisfaction to taste her blood again, and used his gloves to rip up the ground and grass stained with her blood, to toss into the waters. He hunches over and dips both hands into the water, expelling a large around of fel magic into the waters, he unlike Zane did not respect the other elements at play, he used the foulest of magic and forced the elements to respect him and give him what he wanted. He twisted the very research Zane did all those years ago. The water rippled violently staining a black and purple, before the lime green traces of the memory he needed to see, appeared. Zane in the water, blood escaping her nose and mouth, a torrent of bubbles, and her fighting to swim to the surface, his head followed watching the elf come to the shore and just sleep. He turns his head to the left, seeing the canoe, a Tauren coming and picking up Zane and taking her off into the Barrens. He removed his hands from the water and stood up, "Only so many cities in the Barrens....guess that is my start...." He walks into the Barrens to begin his hunt.

Chogan eventually returns to the hull and sees Zane was asleep, cradling, her lips pursed against the ring and chess piece that Jon gave her, kissing it several times in her sleep. Chogan sighed and tapped his hoof to her, "Hey, we are here."

Zane shifted in her sleep and looks at Chogan and starts to stand up and nods to him, "Before we part ways lets convene in the tavern, want to talk to you about things and help get you there faster, the best way I can."

Chogan nods agreeing to her. The went and met at the Salty Sailor.

Chogan and her taking a seat as two Taurens, goblins bringing a cup of mead and some bread and honey, they were near starved given the goblins did not feed them properly, Chogan ripping the bread in half, dipping to the honey he takes to smashing the gluten right into his snout, snorting and grunting as he gobbled it up, Zane pulling out her map, "I will use the last bit of my coin to buy you a Wyvern to the Plaguelands, closest I can get you, then you just need to go up here to enter Sin'Dorei lands." she moved her finger on the map, all the way up to Silvermoon City. She reached into her bag, and handed him a red feather, "You will need this to get into the court, pin it onto you, allows your passage into the mage court that she is with, the feather is our family crest, only those trusted by our family wears them...her name is Zainstra Dawnsky. Tell her a Ghost sent you. She will know what it means."

Chogan nods absorbing all the information. "What message would you like me to tell her?"

Zane thinks on it for a moment and then looks up at Chogan, "Just say this to her...the light of the dawn even shows in the grimmest of skies...." She leans back, it was the code that they came up with in case they were ever found out about. Zainstra knew to head to Stormwind in those times. That was all he needed to say.

Chogan nods, "Got it, where will you go?"

Zane shook her head, "I am heading north." She took her bread with her, downing the mead, "Lets head upstairs and get you a Wyvern." The two taurens truck it upstairs, their hooves making the old floorboards creek some kind of fierce, as they got up to the orc selling flights with the wyverns, the orc snorts, "Passage for ya both or just one of ya?"

Zane points to Chogan, "Just him. He needs passage to the Plaguelands." She hands out a bag of coin, big enough for the Orc to not ask questions. The orc takes the coin and looks inside and nods his head.

The Orc goes to get a large enough wyvern to hold Chogan. Zane nods to Chogan, "Safe travels with you."

Chogan nods to Zane, "As to you, and remember the fight for these people. They seem worth it."

Zane had nothing to say to that, she just turned and walked herself into the tavern to head out, when no eyes were on her she shifted her appearance again, becoming a plate wearing gnome adventurer with a large sword on her back, nipping off pieces of the bread into her mouth, she cackled insanely through her goggles, no one ever questioning it. She moved through all of Stranglethorn Vale to get up into Duskwood, her destination.

Norae'thas had gone to damn near every city in the Barrens before he finally got to Ratchet, this had to be where they went, just had to be, he started with the inn, walking in letting out a deep breath as he went to the inn, "Did a Tauren and Sin'Dorei female come through here? She was injured, can't imagine she or he could go that far...."

Takoda and his wife sitting in the inn waited for whoever was coming for her to show up and saw it be alone Sin'Dorei hunter. They stayed quiet, Takoda smoking on his pipe and his wife just sitting next to him, they said nothing. The innkeeper shook his head, "No, no one of the sorts came through here...."

Norae'thas grinds his teeth, he knew he was being lied too, and he hated it. He sucks on his teeth and turns his back, "I really do not have time for your lies sir, so....let me...." turns back around, "Pretend that did not happen, and let me ask again, did a Tauren and Sin'Dorei female come through here?"

The tavern owner shook his head, and leaned against the counter, snorting hot air onto the elf, "As I said....no."

Norae'thas grabs the orc by his back ponytail and slams his head onto the counter very abruptly, just one good time, and releases, the orc slams his head onto the counter and falls to his knees, and snarls loudly, "Get out of my tavern now!!!!"

Norae'thas shook his head, "I do not think I will be leaving...."

Takoda stood up smoking on his pipe, "Now-now-now, we do not need any of this violence, we are all just people enjoying our evenings, we came to the tavern to get away from all this violence or day to day stuff.... let's calm down."

There was always someone to diffuse the situation. Norae'thas turns and looks at the older Tauren and then at his wife and then back to Takoda, "Then you best tell the tavern keeper here to tell me my information and stop lying and then I will be on my way...."

Takoda sighs and says coldly to the elf, "You heard the orc yes? Your ears be bigger than ours, know you can hear better than you let up, he said no one came through here matching that description, so say your apologies and do as the owner says, get out of here."

Norae'thas knew they were lying, and he would get his answers some way, glaring at Takoda, his hand reached out behind him, as he stares at the cow said softly, as ice formed in his hand, "I must apologize to you dear orc....for ending your life!!!!" the ice shot from his hand, a shard as it struck the orc in his chest, impaling him to the wall.

The few patrons that were in the tavern that was not the Taurens gasped and cried in panic. Takoda stared down the elf and nods, "That was not necessary...."

Norae'thas laughs evilly, "Was very necessary, and before you ask why....the reaction, you did not shake, or wince or cry or gasp...nor did the female there....meaning you expected this behavior out of me....meaning you know exactly what I am asking about...." he throws a chair behind him across the room, "Now you can tell me what I seek and no one else will get hurt....."

Takoda and his wife did not seem to budge for him. Norae'thas glaring at them, "You must really hate the people in here...." he turned and drew daggers from sheaths, and walked towards the people in the tavern, they never expected him to do it, to just kill innocents for no reason, but they were wrong, people ran from him, backing into the corner of the tavern, screaming that the taurens knew something, but knew nothing more, they screamed for them to talk, giving Norae'thas all he needed to know they were involved. But did not stop him from snatching the hair up of a single human female, dragging her out the cornered pile up and drag her out in a display, "Now....you willing to talk? They claim you know something...."

Takoda's wife twisting her hands as if she was grinding pepper on his shoulder, wanting him to end this madness. Takoda watched the mad man act, "I will not talk to the likes of you, you use fear as a weapon....and that is not something I fight with!" The old Taurens stands up, holding his cane into the ground, "You unhand that woman now....she is not about this....."

Norae'thas glares at the angered old cow and twist the roots of the woman he held in place, she crying, begging for her life, her hair twisting and ripping from its roots, "Pleeeease let me go!!!!"

Takoda took the cane in both his hands, "Unhand her! Your fight is with me now!"

Norae'thas snickered, "Can you still move these days old man..." He tossed the human to the ground, "Fine you kill me and you and everyone in here are safe from me, but if I take you down, and I will.....you will talk and tell me everything or I will kill everyone in here in your honor...."

Takoda had enough of this elf, he pulled the cane from his left hand the bark of the cane splitting apart, roots and new leaves coming from it, shooting out an entanglement of roots, grasping and constricting the elf where he stood. Norae'thas did not expect it at all, figured the tauren was just old, maybe a warrior, did not expect a druid in the slightest, he was confined to his location, the Tauren leaped towards Norae'thas shifting into an impressive sized bear, tackling onto his body, pinned under him the teeth of the bear snarled down at him, drooling plopping on his forehead as he said, "Leave here with your life now!!! You will not harm these people!" His thorns and vines still ever twisting and cutting into Norae'thas.

Norae'thas tried to defy and break free, but the roots still kept him in place, his Tauren had him planted, seemed no way out, the roots weaving, further and further him onto the ground, he tried to scream to be released, but the roots wrapped around his head and across his mouth muting him. His hands planted to the ground, glimmers of green and purple came out each hand, portals ripping up from the ground, as out of the ground came two felhounds, both jumping onto the bear. The two felhounds on the back of the bear bite and rend their claws into his backside.

The Tauren staggers himself off Norae'thas as he tried to swing these pesky beasts off of him. Swung around quickly to fling one into the wall, disbursing into the very energy that brought him into the world, the second still on his back nipping and clawing at his fur. All the while Norae'thas started to sit up, tearing some of the vines off his body, his left hand free, tearing the gag over his mouth as he worked on the right side of his body. All the while the female Tauren watched no more, she acted out, she chanted out a shamanistic word, and a totem erupted from the ground, thunderous earth callings emitted from the totem, it made everyone in the room heavier than they naturally were, moved slower. Norae'thas stuck again, all the while the bear heave the felhound onto the ground and used his muzzle to bite the thing into a cloud of purple and black, gone. The Tauren stayed in bear form and snarled again, "As I said! You will leave here with your life!"

The earth totem held him on the ground, he could not move, he felt truly defeated, thinking back to the academy, with Zane, trying to remember her lessons. He in a bed with Zane, the two bodies nude, his fingers walked up against her bare thigh, all the way up to her shoulder, where he kissed her neck. They had recently entwined together as lovers do, she was cuddled against him reading one of her many books, seemed this was her life work. He reached over trying to mess up where she was reading. She swatted his finger away, "Stop it, Nora!"

He kissed and playfully nibbled on her neck, "Or what?" started tickling her mercilessly. She giggling and swatting trying to defend herself, only to be pinned under him, he holding her hands above him, "Now you are stuck!" He looked down at her nude body, and aroused different attention him as he ever grew, "And I like it...."

She felt him hardened among her body and sighs, "Nora we have spent all morning doing that, things are sore and need rest....besides, I think I am onto something, how to truly explain and describe what is happening when I command the elements...."

He keeps one of his hands to hers, releases one so she can move freely, his free hand caressed her neck, sliding down to cup her breast, "I cannot help it, your brain is so sexy....but please explain what you found, I will try to not ravish you." plucking his hand free from her breast and goes to place his hands on her face.

Zaneryne spoke, "Everything is in balance with everything, when a shaman uses an earthbind totem, it ripples a thunderous roar of the earth, shifting and moving things, the debris it causes is an unsettlement of air, allowing a shaman to cast a lightning bolt....that unsettlement is a glimmer of chaos, the meet in the middle as two elements and a thin line between them is chaos....which practically defines what all warlock magic is, pure chaos, so you could pull between those energies and create your chaos bolt must faster!" She looks up at him with a smile.

He listened and could not help himself, slipped his hands between his legs, guiding his girth back into her. All the while in reality he was bound by roots, a earthbind totem weighing him down, in his head played the lovemaking of the two, as he reached between the battling elements and allowed the pure chaos that was there wrap around his fingers, the glow of green and black built up and up before he hurled a chaos bolt through the room, striking the totem and the shaman that created it. The female Tauren threw across the room and hit the wall, falling to the ground, knocked out.

Takoda turned to see his wife thrown about so easily, he started to growl, as the elf tore his roots free from his body, and Norae'thas just said, "Tell me what I want to know and I will leave here with your wife still alive!"

Takoda did not want to sell her out or his son, he was not going to talk, but he was prepared to defend everyone still. He stood his ground, "I will not give you what you want!"

Norae'thas grunts, "Very well, you all will leave out of here in pieces....." he traces his hands up in the air, summoning a portal on the ceiling, hellish like bats rained out the portal striking down, biting and causing hell of Azeroth in that one tight confined room, everyone in there except the taurens screamed in horror, running, doing anything to get away from the bats. It was pure mayhem! His maniacal laughter only kept the portal open longer as an army of imps poured into the tavern, what bats weren't biting the imps where, countless imps filled the room, attacking the innocent people, crawling all over the bear and the knocked out tauren, biting, nipping, pulling and tugging, an innocent in the background, the human, screamed as an imp used a fork from the tavern to stab her in the eye repeatedly.

Takoda, had his share of imps pulling at his fur, biting him, scratching at his good eye, he threw his arms up, standing on two feet for a split moment as a bear, the fur shedding and replacing with feathers as he stood as an owlkin, striking down a beam of blinding Moonfire, eradicating a quarter of the imps. While the Tauren dealt with the imps, he could not stop fast enough as a bolt of chaos struck him in his chest, launching him across the room, tumbling through a pile of chairs and tables before crashing to a stop. Norae'thas walked towards the Tauren and ordered the imps to tear the people in the corner apart, they did just that.

The old tauren as an owlkin still, was like a flipped over turtle, stuck, he looked at the shadow of the elf as he lowered down to him, Norae'thas nodded, "You fought well cow...." He stabbed his dagger carefully, almost surgically into his side, through ribs, to tap the tip onto his heart, the Tauren wheezed in pain as he shifted back into a tauren and looked at the elf, pleading for his life now, twisting the dagger in a manner that if he moved any sort of wrong way it would strike his heart, "Now....that your stuck....you will give me what I want, any move you make, the tip of this dagger will strike your heart and kill you....now tell me what I want to know, I can make you."

Takoda spits on the elf, he was not going to talk. Norae'thas wiped the spit off and nods, "Hard way it is...." He stood up and walked towards the knocked out female Tauren, "Someone great once told me....that if you want to call yourself a master in anything you need to learn everything....now I was not very much like her, and did not learn every school of magic, who has that kind of time.....but I did learn enough of the magicks I needed to be the level of asshole I am....warlock is my Mastercraft, then we have some frost magic because well she was a frost mage and then....shadow magic....now you know why shadow magic is so important here?" He kneels next to the knocked out woman.

Takoda pants a few times, he did not honestly know, he gave no answer. Norae'thas answered for him, "Because I am about to rape the mind of your wife and make her tell me what I want to know...."

Takoda tried to struggle, but felt the prick of that dagger against his heart and stopped, growling, huffing and puffing, begging him to leave his wife alone. Norae'thas did not listen, he in front of the Tauren, placed his hand onto her head, between her horns, and channeled shadow magic into her skull, taking control of her mind, he could not see what she saw, but he did take control of her mind, he softly said, "Tell me about the Sin'Dorei woman that was here...."

The female Tauren seemed to be fighting with herself but could not stop her mouth from talking, "Grimsky was here...a hero among our people, my son...Cho...Cho...." she tried to not say his name, biting down on her bottom lip, causing it to bleed, the magic too strong for her to resist, "Chogan....found her near the Barrens, where Ashenvale touches the Barrens, brought her here...she was injured, bleeding, hurt, looked like she was attacked. We mended her, myself and Takoda, we used shaman and druid magic mostly but also apothecary potions. She healed nicely....she left on the boat, to Stranglethorn Vale...."

Norae'thas smirks, "Good good, where is she headed did she say?"

The Tauren still fought hard but could not resist the mind control, "No...she did not say, just that she needed to be on that side of the world....she traveled with my son Chogan, disguised as a Tauren female to not be tracked so easily...."

Norae'thas got the information he needed, he opened his mouth, forcing the tauren to look at him, "look at me!"

The Tauren looked at him, his eyes hollowed, face turned white as a ghost as he shrieked, only something she heard, the horrific mind scream, she started to thrashed about as she went through every moment of fear in her life again, beating her skull into things to get it out of her head. Norae'thas stood up not caring the woman was in pain, he turned towards Takoda who was screaming at him to make it stop, the woman pounded her head into the wall until she stops moving, unclear if she was dead or just knocked out. Norae'thas knelt down and sneered at the cow, "This could have been avoided if you just gave me what I wanted!" Before Takoda could say anything, Norae'thas pushed his dagger into his heart.

Takoda's good eye went wide, the pupil pulsing before he relaxed finally. Norae'thas pulled his dagger out, cleaning off the blood onto the dead Tauren's tunic and stood up, and looked at the army of imps who were picking apart the people in the corner, and waved them off, "Go ahead dance in there carcasses, have fun...." cracking his neck side to side he stepped out the tavern massacre and walked towards the dock, very poshly saying, "Now where were we...."

He gives an eerie hum and thinks back on those heated moments of sex with Zaneryne.

#wyrmrest horde #wyrmrest rp #wyrmrest roleplay #Wyrmrest Alliance #wyrmrest accord

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ihaveastorminme · 5 years ago

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hi! i badly want to read how ruthless are the gentle but the past but complicated jon/dany tag is off-putting. i dislike dany in general ngl, but since she never left KL and assuming she doesn't have dragons, is it safe to say that she's written differently? is she antagonistic at all towards sansa?

HI! im so glad you asked me, because i can dispell your doubts immediately. Dany and Sansa are friends in this fic

Not only are they friends, but they also share a secret and keep each other as safe as they can. I have tried to add a layer of believable distance between them - one that they are both aware of, in terms of power. How much power each has, the painful limits of that power and their own recognized right to keep secrets. How they both know that if Rheagar wants Dany to do something, no matter how hard Dany might fight it, she will have to do it. Even if it is in Sansa’s detriment. (though you will see that does not at all keep daenerys from being very creative with how she executes her brother’s orders)

Dany is mostly there to serve as a ‘window to the past’ for both Jon and Sansa, because she can see how they are different with each other, (and different from who they used to be), since she knows them both. (she's allowing me to make those comparisons, without resortign to flashbacks). She was supposed to bring the past into the story, to showcase how much Jon has moved on from it; how they have both grown into a better understanding of human relationships. And eventually moving on to having better relationships eith each other and other people.

She also serves as a person with a different pov on politics, a different agenda (in the sense that where Jon and Sansa want to gtfo ouf King’s Landing, Dany wants to stay and affect change). She serves to illustrate how troubled both her own past and Jon’s were, how unruly they used to be, how isolating King’s Landing can be, how toxic.

Her relationship with Jon is only alluded to, tbh. I have not spent that much brainpower in its details because it simply was not a priority. Their present relationship is familial, if a bit conflictual, because Dany hasn’t seen Jon in a long time when the story starts and he’s changed quite a bit. So she doesnt really understand what he’s doing, and gets in his face (to protect Sansa btw). And her feelings on the matter are complicated, because there are remnants of possessiveness there, but the same way one is possessive of a friend, sometimes, when we feel them slipping away from us. Mostly she’s just pissed at jon for being an ass (at one point) and then she will be integrated into the story and will work with Jon and Sansa both.

Mostly I have tried to write her kindly, with respect to what little I know about her from the books, since I have not read them. She does not have dragons, but she will have dragon eggs - however, I will not take the story far enough into the future to see them hatch.

I really hope i managed to lower your doubts. If you have any other questions, I will be happy to answer them. (if you give me some time, I will post an outline of the chpaters posted, like a summary for each of them, if you want to skip the ones where Dany and Jon come into contact - which to be fair is very little. It's like, two chapters from her pov? in chapter 12 we see whats happening through he reyes for a bit - because i needed a third pov to really bring to the forefront how weird sansa and jon were being - and it took someone who knew both of them well, to notice. and chapter 13 , where Dany confronts Jon. That's it, more or less. The other times they interact, they're with Others of their family and they dont really connect on a different level than that one.)

#how uthless are the gentle #asks

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julibf · 6 years ago

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I AM STARTING TO BELIEVE THAT CERSEI MAY SURVIVE THIS WHOLE MESS........

I have to confess that I ALWAYS believed Sansa’s quote from season 2 to be a huge foreshadowing of a future event, I just couldnt figured out of whom or what. Then this past week it hit me that Lady Ollena refered to Cersei as the “worst person she has ever met” and something inside me just clicked.

So, I started to wonder if Cersei wont end in exile after all the mess she caused in the 7 Kingdom. That was the offer that Ned Stark gave to her right in the beggining....

“Exile,” she said. “A bitter cup to drink from.”

“A sweeter cup than your father served Rhaegar’s children,” Ned said, “and kinder than you deserve. Your father and your brothers would do well to go with you.”

— A Game of Thrones, Eddard XII

That would be a very surprising ending, thats for sure, since everybody and their mothers are expecting Cersei to die. The show made sure to leave the Valonqar part of the prophecy out, so maybe this would be the reason.

Now, I know that Cersei is a true villain in this story; she is selfish, destructive and causes death and destruction all because she wants the Iron Throne, she is pretty much a mirror for D@enerys, the other queen whose obssesion to the Throne leaves a trail of death, misery and pain.

Their storyline lines are literally identical, so, it would seem fair to assume that both would suffer death in the end, but there is a very important difference between Cersei and D@ny and is that, Cersei is HONEST. She do all the terrible things she does because she wants power and the Throne. She doesnt make elaborate speeches about how she is doing all she is doing to improve the lives of her people; or pretends to be a savior; or lies about her reasons she enjoys to kill her enemies. Unlike D@eerys who will create a bizarre story about a wheel just to excuse her invasion of Westeros and never admits that she kills her enemies in cruel ways because she enjoys to see them die in a cruel way.... I think this little detail its important for George RRMartin.

Also, Cersei has a lot of Margaret of Anjour in her storyline, the woman many blame for the whole War of the Roses. Queen Margaret, in the end of the war, was taken as a prisioner by the victorious side, the Yorkists (which are mirrors for the Starks) “and was sent to France in exile, where she died by the age of 52....

I have to confess, this would blow the audience way. Cersei death its the one thing they are all expecting, for the main audience, she is the villain that will be cast down by the magical and good Targ Queen, no one expects her to survive, which makes me believe that George may find this ending too predictible and boring.

sooooo, those are my crazy thoughts this friday.....

EDIT- BTW, this is a surprising idea that came to my mind since I always believed Cersei to die because of Tyrion speech to her

Tyrion to Cersei: I will hurt you for this. A day will come when you think you're safe and happy and your joy will turn to ashes in your mouth. And you will know the debt is paid. GAME OF THRONES - SEASON 2 EPISODE 8

This episode was written by George RRMartin himself, so, I always assumed this was Cersei Lannister ending...

But maybe, Sansa’s quote is about Tyrion. He is kind of terrible and he was the one who brought the Queen of Ashes to Westeros, soo, maybe he is the true worst one. And when they released the videos of the Houses for season 8, they showed us the scene of Tyrion and Jaime saying goodbye to each other once again..... hummm. I am getting the feeling that one Lannister will be exiled by the end of the show..

#jonsa #cersei lannister #gameofthrones #season8 #house lannister

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buzzedbabe · 6 years ago

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@thewolfdragon @richard-madden @maddennfl86 @thenorthremembersalways @thefashionprofessor @robbstarkmademedoit @what-would-wonderwoman-do

story below for those that can’t read it

How much time are you spending thinking about Bodyguard? A lot, I bet. The new BBC thriller, about the relationship between an ambitious and unknowable home secretary and her PTSD-addled protection officer, was written by Jed Mercurio of Line of Duty fame, and was cynically and artfully designed to hook, obsess and fixate an audience into appointment viewing.

Bodyguard is made to steal us away from all newly acquired suit-yourself, binge-watch and content-stream habits, with charismatic heroes who might actually be despicable antiheroes and a succession of frenzied plot twists that simply must be consumed on the night lest someone catch you out with a spoiler on social media. Even if that doesn’t happen, even if your viewing isn’t partly ruined by a stray Facebook comment, watch an episode even a little late and find yourself locked out of all the best conversations, the most detailed post mortems, most frenetic speculations. Bodyguard is, in essence, a middle-aged Love Island, a reason to gather excitedly round the screen at the prescribed hour in a way that hasn’t really happened since the late Nineties.

Bloody hell, it’s good, I tell its star Richard Madden. The 32-year-old Glaswegian actor made his name as Robb Stark in Game of Thrones and consolidated it as Prince Charming in 2015’s Kenneth Branagh-directed Cinderella. Now, after playing Mellors in Mercurio’s 2015 Lady Chatterley’s Lover for the BBC, he trembles on the verge of Poldarking himself into borderline indecent, heavily fetishised glory as Bodyguard’s David Budd, the protection officer at the heart of the story.

“Oh, right,” he says. His accent is broad, non-posh Scottish; unexpected to those who remember it as generically Yorkshire in Game of Thrones. His eyes are intense. He’s arch and funny; he’d probably qualify as dangerously charming if there weren’t also something watchful and cautious about him. “Thanks very much! I enjoyed playing something a bit more adult, less boyish. I’m keen to play more grown-up roles, without actually growing up myself. Pretending to be adult. I’m done playing princes. Princes and royalty and lords. Also, it’s nice not to do an accent.” David Budd is – conveniently – Scottish. “One less thing to think about. Shall we get a drink? It is a Tuesday night, after all.”

It’s a Monday, I point out, but all the same we order a beer and wine from the front desk of the photographic studio in which we sit.

This is not the first time Madden and I have met. Three years ago, he bowled up to me at a friend’s party and demanded to know why I hadn’t featured him in Grazia magazine’s Chart of Lust recently. A placing in the list (which I compile weekly, and does exactly as its title suggests – rates the most fanciable people of that moment’s news), is deeply coveted among those who present themselves as above that kind of vanity, but definitely aren’t. Newscasters, Hollywood A-listers, national treasures, disruptive artists (Grayson Perry once told me he’d pinned his mention up on the wall in his studio), award-winning novelists … I’ve been lobbied by spads chasing mentions for their political charges on more than one occasion. But this was the first time a candidate had ever approached me in the flesh. I was both impressed and amused by his front.

“It does my frail ego good,” he’d elaborated, which, I’d thought, demonstrated a surprising amount of self-awareness in a young actor.

I remind him of our first meeting.

“Oh, God. Great start,” he says. Then, “I’m just trying to work my way up [the chart].”

Well, let’s see how this goes, shall we.

One of the reasons I think Bodyguard resonates so hard with its viewers is that it’s dealing with themes of safety – and so are we all. Terrorist attacks, suicide bombers and rooftop snipers recur from episode to episode; our current nightmares, and most catastrophising daytime fantasies, the ones that flicker through our minds every time we board a plane, go to a concert venue or swipe into a subway system, are played out in high definition on our small screens. Madden’s David Budd thwarts and buffers and foresees and repels; a hero with a fantastically of-the-moment brief. If Poldark is our ultimate historical TV pin-up – manly, tortured, good with his shirt off – then Budd is our ultimate Threat Level: Severe pin-up – manly, tortured, good in a bulletproof vest (“An actual bulletproof vest,” he’ll tell me, “which is so comfortable, for five months”).

I run this theory past Madden. How nervy is he in London right now?

“I don’t feel unsafe. I used to be more panicky, but I’m just less uptight. A few years ago, I’d get off at Tube stations because I’d have a sense of something.”

How much of David Budd’s wariness did Madden inherit through the course of filming?

“You get to a point where you clock everything. That’s what I’m doing for 12 hours a day, so …”

Walk into a room, scope it out for the nearest exit?

“I did that anyway. My dad’s a fireman, so that’s built in. Check into a hotel, first thing I do, find the fire exit.”

Richard Madden was born just outside of Glasgow, an only boy among older and younger sisters. His mother, Pat, is a classroom assistant. There were no other performers in his close family – no pub-singer uncles, no sisters at dance school.

You’re, like, a rogue luvvie.

“Yup!” he says.

How does that happen?

“I don’t know. I was fat. And shy. Crushingly shy, going to what was a fairly tough high school. Aggressive. Masculine. So I thought the best thing to do would be to go and be an actor. Ha ha! Not go and play football. Or get good at boxing. I’ll go and be an actor. They’ll love that.”

Aged 11, Madden joined Paisley Art Centre’s youth theatre programme. “And of course, they did not love that. But then I managed to dodge a couple of years of school, because …”

Because he was good enough to be cast, as a young teenager, in professional roles: in the film adaptation of Iain Banks’ Complicity, and in a kids’ TV show called Barmy Aunt Boomerang.

“So I was like, ‘I’m going to be acting, and not go to school.’ And get paid.”

Did you realise you were good? “I don’t think you ever feel good at it.”

He gave up acting in his mid-teens – “Life got a bit shit, when you’re on telly, among your peers, and you’re 14 years old”. He returned to it when he was 17, “because you have a bunch of teachers going, ‘Right, now you must decide what to do with the rest of your life,’ and 17 is of course the best time to choose.”

In 2004, he began studying at the Royal Scottish Academy of Music and Drama. “I wasn’t allowed to apply for drama school unless I applied for a ‘real’ course as well, which was computing science. I didn’t even know what it was. Had no interest. And then, luckily, the day before my first exams, I received a letter saying you’ve got into drama school, so I went to my exams and just wrote my name.”

At 22, barely out of the RSAMD, he was cast as Robb Stark in HBO’s epic, fantastically successful Game of Thrones. Stark is the noble, brave, integrity-hampered son of Sean Bean’s Ned Stark; a character with a genuine and credible claim on the kingdom’s iron throne, all of which condemned him to a phenomenally gruesome death in an episode entitled The Rains of Castamere, only fans of the show (among whom I count myself, unashamedly) call it “The Red Wedding”, on account of the blood-drenched ceremony during which Madden, his pregnant wife and his mother all die.

Madden says he thinks that early, formative brush with a TV career was both “a head-f***” and, “I was so thankful for it, because, going into the world of Game of Thrones, I’d already learnt so much from doing it as a kid, of feeling isolated, or getting arrogant because you’re on a TV show. I’d kind of done all that. I could deal with it a lot better.”

A lot better than whom, among your co-stars?

He cackles. “Wouldn’t you like to know.”

Yes! Can I guess? “No.”

Madden went into Game of Thrones knowing he would die within three series – the books on which the shows are based spelled out Robb Stark’s demise long before Madden was cast – which he thinks is a good thing, professionally speaking. “I didn’t just want to be known as that guy from Game of Thrones.” It also meant that his celebrity has, until this point at least, been tinged with pity, partly for the grotesque manner of his fictional death, partly because he was booted out of that juggernaut of a TV sensation early.

That might be about to change with Bodyguard. I am reasonably confident Madden’s fame is about to be tinged with something rather more lecherous. David Budd is in no sense a straightforward romantic hero – physically and emotionally scarred, with an undivorced wife and kids squirrelled away in a safe house – but heavens, he does brooding intensity well. His love affair with Keeley Hawes’ home secretary, Julia Montague, is as intensely sexy as it is quietly subversive, for making no reference to Hawes’ Montague being ten years older than Madden’s Budd. The whole thing is designed to charm the pants off us, and I wonder how prepared Madden is to receive the unbridled lust of thousands of women on social media.

If Twitter erupts with lechery …

“I won’t look.”

Why?

“Because if I do, and if I believe someone going, ‘Oh God, he’s hot,’ then I’ll also have to believe the person that goes, ‘He’s got pumpkin teeth.’ Do you know what I mean?”

Yes, but, you are widely considered handsome, so …

“I don’t see it.”

Truly not?

“Truly not.”

It is form for beautiful young actors to deny their looks, in the interest of seeming more humble and likeable than they really are, but I think, in Madden’s case, he could mean it. He tells me fame has made him feel less attractive, not more. “You chat to a girl at a bar, have a couple of drinks, and shy Richard is slowly going. This is going well. And then it’s, ‘My boyfriend’s a really big fan. Can I get a picture?’ And you go, ‘F***.’ You think they think you’re hot, but it’s because you’re on telly.”

I ask Madden if he thinks he’s irredeemably defined by the chubby, shy child he used to be.

“I feel like I should lie down on that sofa and give you a hundred quid.”

Were you really so scarringly fat?

“Thirty-eight inch waist when I was 12. I didn’t wear denim until I was 19, because denim is really hard to take up. My mum couldn’t take my jeans up.”

Would you say you have body issues?

“Absolutely, yeah.”

Despite all of which, Richard Madden does OK with women. When I originally met him, he’d been in the final stages of a long-term relationship with the actor Jenna Coleman, who stars as Victoria in the ITV show, and who is now in a relationship with her onscreen Albert, Tom Hughes. Since then, Madden has been gossip-column-linked to a succession of beautiful women – model Suki Waterhouse and TV presenter Laura Whitmore among them – none of whom seem notably put off by his pumpkin teeth.

“I think in the last year I was, as far as the tabloids went, dating seven different people. And when you receive a text saying, ‘Are you sleeping with blah blah,’ and you go, ‘No,’ that’s a bit weird.”

Who are you sleeping with?

“I’m not saying.”

But you are sleeping with someone?

“I am sleeping with someone. I am very happy with someone. There are pictures of it on the internet.”

If it’s the one everyone thinks you’re dating, I say – by which I mean the 21-year-old Ellie Bamber, with whom he was pictured most recently at the Serpentine Gallery summer party – then she’s another actor. Is it really a good idea to go out with other actors?

“Yes and no. Yes, because you understand what each other’s going through. No, because, there’s a certain level of self-focus you need, in order to do the job you’re doing. That’s hard on all relationships, because what am I going to talk to you about? I walk up and down for 12 hours a day, dealing with this character’s shit. That’s all I’ve done, every day, for the past three months … I really haven’t got anything to offer you as a friend.”

We return, briefly, to Bodyguard. He says he got on brilliantly with Keeley Hawes. “Love her, love her to pieces. She saved my arse, because it’s not a fun job. It’s not a comedy. But then Keeley and me, me and her, off screen, were just like two kids.”

Were you paid the same?

“No idea. I imagine she earned more. I care less about how much other people are paid, and more what it takes for me to shut up and go and do my job. The equality thing needs to be addressed hugely between male and female co-stars; I know that from friends of mine. But there’s only so much I can do for myself. Agents and lawyers, they do all that stuff. I just kind of deal with what I need to, so I don’t look a producer in the eye and f***ing hate them when they’re talking about their villas, and you’re thinking, shit, I’m getting the bus at the weekend, because I don’t have the money for a cab, you know?”

How rich are you?

“Not very. People think I am, because of Game of Thrones, but you know, when I signed up for that I was 22, with f*** all on my CV, so I was paid f*** all.”

Then, somehow, we end up talking about his body again.

“In between filming, I eat pizza, drink, don’t work out, get fat, then it’s six weeks till you have to be naked again. It’s always six weeks. Actually, that’s if you’re lucky. I have ten days till I take my clothes off again this time.”

What’s the occasion?

“I’m filming Rocketman, the Elton John film, and I play John Reid, his first boyfriend, his manager for 28 years.”

A straight man in a gay role; casting that has become contentious after Disney named comedian Jack Whitehall, who is straight, as the voice of its first openly gay hero.

“Yeah, and Taron Egerton [who is playing Elton John] is a straight man in a gay role,” says Madden, “and I think we’re all f***ed if we start going down the route of you can only play a gay part if you’re a gay actor. Diversity, equality and pay – of course we need to make sure of all that, but at the same time … I read reports that so and so’s pulled out of this role because they’re not transgender, and you go, yeah, but they’re a f***ing actor, and they’re probably really f***ing good in the part, and maybe that is part of the reason why that film’s getting made …”

We wind up with him telling me he isn’t bothered about an Oscar. “Because, who won best actress last year? Best actor? Best supporting actor? What won best musical?”

No idea.

“So what does it matter?” he says.

After which, he is beautifully mocking (off the record) about a very famous actor’s latest endeavour, before hugging me goodbye and pretending – well – he hopes to see me again soon, socially. Richard Madden made it to No 2 in the current issue of Grazia’s Chart of Lust Bodyguard continues tomorrow at 9pm on BBC One. Episodes 1 and 2 are on BBC iPlayer

#richard madden #bodyguardbbc #robb stark

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moldypieceoflasagna · 6 years ago

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36 questions that nobody asked me

(except @lollipoppedchainsaw )

(the 36 questions that lead to love or whatever) https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/fashion/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html

1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?

I hate going out to dinner so much i probably wouldnt be able to enjoy it properly

2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?

It would be interesting to see what it’s like for a short period of time, but i’d never be able to keep it up; i’d probably have an identity crisis

3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?

yes i have to mentally prepare myself 100% of the time

4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?

hanging out with the people i love is enough to keep me happy for a good while tbh. sitting around doing nothing literally nothing with them is endlessly entertaining to me even though sometimes i might make that hard to believe

5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?

i sing to myself a lot, not so much to others- although i AM a slut for karaoke

6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?

body because i feel thats probably what old people complain about most. plus like,, 90 years of life knowledge? sounds great to me

7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?

probably an accident that’s almost statistically impossible

8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.

single rn (ladies) but i usually try to find friends with similar music tastes because scream-singing in the car is the most fun one can have

9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

im most grateful for my dogs and for my friends! i love them and it means the world to me to have people that i can call family. also i would die without my dog juno, she is my rock (and my therapist)

10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

Not rly how i was raised, but i wish i had a closer relationship with my older siblings. Three of them had moved out before i was rly old enough to not be an asshole child, so most of them still see me as an asshole child and they never take me seriously. im glad i have an alright relationship with them, but that’s kinda all it is and i know i could do better

11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.

Lived in Texas my whole life yeehaw. I have 2 brothers and 2 sisters; 2 of them dont like me, and my relationship with the other 2 is,, certainly not bad. Had a lot of physical and mental illness in the past, but 20gayteen is definitely my year, yeet

12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?

either speaking a different language or playing the piano. im very jealous of good piano players, and at some point i need to be able to speak a more useful language than french because so far in texas it’s proved absolutely useless (other than talking to my mom but that doesnt count)

13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?

I’d wanna know wtf im supposed to do with my life because sweaty i still have no idea. passion? dont know her please introduce me

14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?

i wanna go skydiving bitch, no one wants to go with me! pussies!!! the lot of you

15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

that one time i did an entire semester’s worth of work in the last three days of the school year

16. What do you value most in a friendship?

being able to put up with my huge fucking mouth. also honesty is super important, even if it’ll make me feel shitty

17. What is your most treasured memory?

when i went camping with a bunch of friends and they were bitter i got to be in the middle of the tent because they were all cold. either that or the time i was getting really bad sleep paralysis and @lonelywaterfall & @skity stayed over so my paranoia didnt render me completely useless,,, also the paramore concert lol ive never been more vulnerable in my life.

18. What is your most terrible memory?

coming out to my mom haha

19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?

i’d go on a trip around the world to explore/to see a few people, and i’d put extra effort into my gender expression

20. What does friendship mean to you?

comfortable silence is my kink. also emotional vulnerability and SAD BOY HOURS we cant forget those

21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?

I’m such a slut for physical affection yall have no idea please hug me as much as possible and play with my hair or my hands

22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.

i guess ill do the same with previous partners so.. i think being funny is probably the #1 thing i appreciate in someone. when you make me laugh so hard i cry, just know that’s like. peak. also stubbornness is strangely attractive to me, plus like,,, uh having an unexpected soft side? an appreciation of art is super important, too. also SPOON VERSATILITY.

23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?

it was probably happier than a lot of people’s but there wasnt much to it. plus being the youngest in my ENTIRE family really sucked during my childhood because everyone picked on me and i think that’s probably what started a lot of my issues lol

24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?

better than it could be, but definitely not what i want it to be. we both love each other and i admire her work ethic, but she gave me a lot of anxiety problems (both genetically and not) and she isnt the most understanding person.��i have hope though, people change

25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling …

I’m hungry and sitting alone in front of my computer feeling like OVERSHARING ON THIS BEAUTIFUL THURSDAY MORNING, BOYS

26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share …

many, MANY animals and a lighthouse in the middle of nowhere

27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.

I’m REALLY insecure about my body xd

28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.

LOVE feeling safe.

29. Share an embarrassing moment in your life.

probably every time that i’ve ever worn a dress, because i really,, really dont like wearing dresses and that’s it

30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?

last cried by myself this morning and last cried in front of another person at my friend’s birthday party

31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.

no partner but if youre reading this im rly proud of ur attention span. gj buddy

32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?

i think most things can be joked about after a certain amount of time, but like,, it has to actually be funny and it has to come from someone i know isnt serious about it. if a joke is made just for the purpose of being offensive and edgy, it’s never funny no tea just truth.

33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?

i’d regret not spending enough time with people that i love, not traveling as much as i should have, and also i’d regret not formally coming out of the closet to my family (they probably already been done knew but like. yknow). i came out to myself & the people closest to me a LONG ass time ago, but i’ve kinda seen what it did to my immediate family so im not too excited to do that to my extended family. if i’m not too much of a pussy, ill probably do it in the summer when i see them next, bc ive been meaning to for a while.

34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?

is it bad of me to say my computer? i feel like everyone else has a much more meaningful answer lol. it would probably either be that or the papers i keep on my bulletin board, bc most of them hold a lot of sentimental value (also my prescriptions would be a pain to get copies of)

35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?

either of my parents because i dont want them dying before i reach the point where i can expect them to be happy for me when i marry a girl

36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.

personal problems? what’re those lmfao dont have any srry try me again later

i’m too much of a pussy to tag certain people so if you see this and I've had any sort of conversation with you, do it coward

(also @skity @drawinintherain )

#love exposing myself to people on the internet #hot

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loyalbreed · 7 years ago

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Cent has decided to back away for the time being; because he feels that it is effecting people he has come to appreciate. That he doesnt know how to return such kindness that was given to him in full. And much like the beginning when the catfish thing first happened, he is overwhelmed and doesnt know where to begin to reach out to people. Again like the beginning, the only people who spoke to him about it wanting an answer. Were the people directly effected by it? Myself included, versus people who just kept using it against him? The Catfish thing was resolved and ended well between many people who were effected actually. The person who owns the blog that is being linked about him is scrambling to delete it since it was kept by her and a lot of others. To make sure it was out there that what had done, did happen. And that it wasn't over looked either; the fact Cent asked to keep that blog up. Should be important notion alone over who he is as a person. It was not to be brought up negatively again and used as a tool to populate someones obsession and anger over him. Since it seems to continue to happen by the same people staring a new issue every so often when he has people comfortably having fun with him. Which makes me upset because it seems that if a community is happy; unhappiness needs to happen.

I do not like long posts--and honestly this didnt stay short. But I want say how upset I am this happens again. Considering I was one of the close to him when Cent Catfished; its really stupid to see people who had nothing to do with him at the time. Bring this up as if they were really the ones effected most directly from it? Further you are bringing up bad feelings that many people have already come to let sit on their chest and deal with ultimately. To further delve into my own sense of okay this post is about me, even though this isnt. I need you all to know how Call Out Culture is ineffective and Bad. From my stand point with my experience I want to leave you with a short burst of information about myself and how we handle it along with DCF, a separate government branch, DDS, and her therapists. My sister is severely mentally disabled. For the rest of our lives we will be taking care of her. She cannot wash herself. She thinks that Star Scream from Transformers is real and often comes to talk to her. I told her once she couldnt date a toaster as a joke, and she threw the toaster at me screaming about it. She really thinks star scream is attractive, and often details herself with obsessions with Aliens and outer space. She thinks God is evil-- because God made her this way. And cant understand why that is a sad thing to say. She just gets frustrated; frustrated is her essence of living. And acting out on it is how she is derived of. To continue, she has pushed me down stairs. Abused me. Told me to die. Tried killing me several times. Has emotionally abused my little brother to the point we have a separate staff of people in and out of our house for him. This is nearly every day for me; every day it is. Is kayla alright? did she do something? Did she hurt someone? did she hurt herself? no? Good good. Today was a good day. How is this relevant toward this situation and pertaining toward things going on; the thing is rather then take my sister out of the house considering how constant this is. The government stresses on keeping her in the home and helping us all as a whole keep together. When a break is needed; and it can be afforded. She goes into Respite Program where she leaves for a week or so. She is actually going to one soon, and is very excited because they are going to go out a lot! To reiterate the government keeps disabled individuals who may be a threat to the family within the home. With emergency issues and things that need happen--and yes when she says she wants to kill you she means it. As someone she has tried to I can say that much alright. To make a point; People who are an issue you do not merely remove them and or kick them out. Indeed themes need be addressed and if their are serious manners of which Pedophila is being actually done then we and you. Need to contact police enforcement. They will take you seriously; it is a serious endeavor. You can involve Tumblr Staff as well, there are channels to pull with if there is something volatile that need be addressed. I implore you to. Yet often times it seems when posts are made, the latter is true. To highlight the issues where, Cent condones or romanticizes these things that are being said. If you read these rules it is not the case. He states that he will participate in these things but does not want just anyone asking him. Nor does he want anyone shipping with the character as he doesnt understand why it is you would? It is weird to think that from these text alone you would take context otherwise-- Especially knowing before this post was presented. Cent talked about how on his Bel blog he doesnt want to make people feel like his Bel is pushing on them or making them uncomfortable. And that he would never participate in noncon. Or that on King Arthur; he does not do any of these themes what so ever. That these themes are only present on the villainous character he does not even participate in roleplaying anymore. To round this over; it is getting upsetting seeing how this is effecting one another when the general idea is ‘ i just want to be happy and want people to talk/do things with.’ Rather then ‘ i want nothing to do with this person. ‘ So many people are stressed out and want to talk to cent. Reach out to Cent. But are constantly being told otherwise; its sad and im happy to know that people exist out there that know in actuality how dealing with problems work. Versus adhering the idea that you need kick someone out. I fear those people. Because i fear letting my sister do something around someone and someone not understanding and condoning her for it when they only have a minuscule of the story. Seeing as people cant even understand someone who makes sense how would you understand someone like my sister? Its cool you can say now ‘ oh But no we arent talking about that. ‘ Yet the only reason why you can feel this way is because you know the story behind my sister, many of you dont know anything about Cent save for interacting with him and that he makes you laugh. So Im going to Tell you one thing about Cent that for me now that you know my story makes me happy to share. Seeing that Cent came out from such a bad place, being such a bad person, doing such horrible things but choosing to do better made me believe in others again. It made me believe that even if my sister does all the things she does. There is always a spot and place for her to truly come about and make a better decision too. True, Cent is a more able bodied man and isnt disabled like my sister. But its just the fact that he does and he could and he can. That makes me believe anyone can. It makes me feel like no matter who you were in the past; you can always chose to be better then that. And no matter how many times or who wants to believe who you are in the past dictates who you are in the future. Wont ever mean as much; That anyone despite the things they have done can always chose to be a better person then what they had been. And cent really does solidify that fact. As someone who knew him from the time as a cat fished. That got catfished by him. Literally back stabbed by him. Only to come down and talk again as friends. I feel like I get to say that not anyone else, and Im really glad to be able to say that lmao. He is my closet friend and will always remain to be. I don’t mind if you feel you do not want to talk to me or think I romanticize his issues as someone who has gone through so much. So much and more, you would not begin to understand. I feel you are more then welcome to believe that but I know there are people who talk to him and know what he does and feels the same. And are comfortable with the rounded world they have created with friends. And I really ( SHOUNEN VOICE ) I really just believe in people--people change. And Cent makes me realize that this is possible. And you cant just remove people out of your life thinking they wont. And because I know better and because I am an adult with my head well on my shoulders. I can make that decision, i understand if you cannot yet or are afraid or uncertain. I implore you to keep yourself safe just know that some of us feel chill. and we are all alright btw!! So dont feel like we are being attacked or manipulated by cent.

But I insist you stop thinking that trying to get rid of someone is going to solve an issue. People continue living and breathing every day regardless of what you think or want to happen? No one is ignoring the issues or ignoring the fact that stuff happened if you are scared or uncertain as well about them feel free to add me and we can always group convo and you can let your feelings bare. Or anyone really? just be mindful and fair?

This isnt going to make Cent come back i really just feel like. I want these feelings to be known and that if you are ever called out personally I will gladly give you a chance of your own. I can only hope to god, that he would give that chance to my sister one day if something happened. And to anyone and everyone, as well as teach other people that everyone deserves that much.

#「✱《 𝓢 𝓱 𝓮 s p e a k s 》 ᵒ ᵒ ᶜ」#This is indeed about what you think it is #so its under read more #though i apologize to mobile users #i ask that you no need to comment on this and not #i merely wish for this to be as it is and if the other party who has started the issue continues #they can continue to comment on it as it seems to effect them the most in current #otherwise iwish to just let this be known #somewhere

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maxattack-powell · 7 years ago

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The Freshman: 2-1

Book 2 - 1 Chapter 1: Winter in Hartfeld

Masterlist - go here for other chapters and related original fics

Disclaimer: The following are fics (adaptations from actual game chapters AND original works) to Choices: The Freshman and The Sophomore stories. It is a fictional adaptation. I (we) do not work for Pixelberry Studios, the game developer or own the rights to the characters Chris Powell, Nicole or any other IN GAME character. All of the ORIGINAL characters, storylines and events were developed for my adaptation of The Freshman story.

Comments: I enjoyed playing Choices The Freshman… and then I found this awesome group of people and their works - I’ve loved it all, very much so. Deciding that I wanted more interaction than the options allowed, I’ve gone through the first book, chapter by chapter (omg painfully slow) to follow the story (95-99% I’d say) and add to it as I felt would benefit. Now I am doing the same to Book 2 as well.

Basically, I wanted to include certain things that weren’t really full fic worthy, adding more substance to the story. However, I did add some full size fic moments also… some are included in cannon chapters and some are their own full chapters in between. I wanted to see MC and Chris through their freshman year… with more angst, fluff, sweetness, real life and overall detail. So, if you like that pairing then you’ll be satisfied, otherwise sorry James & Kaitlyn fans lol. I even added some parts from Chris’s POV, so that we have a chance to see what he’s thinking, knowing what she experienced.

NSFW moments in future chapters - Mature Readers Only Please

Paring: MC x Chris

POV: ~MC~ or ~Chris~

~MC~

Morning finally comes for the last day of Winter Break. MC is sad, but also beyond excited to get back to Hartfeld. She’s missed her family and friends while at school, but now what she misses more than anything is a single person. The thought baffles her mind, but she accepts it with a warm embrace as it just feels right.

Early yesterday, she told her mom that she wants to get to Hartfeld bright and early, which was slightly different than the original plan. That mornings text from Chris might have had something to do with it, seeing how just thinking about the text makes her stomach flip. MC assumes her mom knows why, but she doesn't care. She just wants to get there, to see her friends, and to see Chris. The only thing she wishes she could change would be to bring Max. Leaving him gets harder every time.

Her bags were packed and ready before she went to sleep the night before, so when the alarm went off this morning she was easily jumping out of bed and getting dressed within minutes. She did take a moment to send a ‘Good Morning, handsome’ text to Chris, beating him to the punch, a rare win for her over the Winter Break.

Even With all of her preparations, her mother moves slowly around the house, as if she had nowhere to go all day. MC was trying not to become furious with her, but her mother knows she wants to get back to Hartfeld. She internally grumbles about losing her truck to her dad. He had to sell his car after he lost his job, and since she wasn't using her truck during first quarter, he commandeered it. Now she was actually without wheels, something she hoping to have soon at Hartfeld. She wasn't going to give up though, she would find a way.

After a few minutes of following her mother around pointlessly, MC drops to the sofa with a huff. That's when she notices a message from Chris.

‘Morning, beautiful. Decided to sleep in huh?’ She can see the smirk on his face when he typed it. She quickly checks the time and sees that it's only just now about 9 a.m. She frowns and wonders what he means. Then it hits her. He's been on the road for hours at this point, how could she forget. He had asked her last night when she was going to leave in the morning, and now she knows why - he left in time to meet her at Hartfeld.

The crease in her brow deepens when she counts back the hours to guess at his departure time. She frowns and sends him a message. ‘You better not be texting while driving. And OMG, what time did you leave?!’

She quickly shakes her head and sends another. ‘Don't answer that. Don't text while driving. Dont read this!’

MC smacks her palm to her forehead lightly and rubs down her face when she realizes what she just did. Clearly, she’s not thinking straight. Maybe she didn't get enough sleep, or maybe she's distracted. Suddenly her phone rings, making her about jump out of her skin. She quickly lifts it to see who it is and grins when she sees Chris’s picture.

She jumps up from the sofa and bolts to her room, narrowly missing her mother as they pass in the hall. She blindly kicks her door shut with her foot as she answers the call. “You better not be driving Christopher Powell.”

She hears him laugh lightly on the other side. “I wouldn't dream of it. I promised… a long time ago. Do I need to prove it?”

MC shakes her head even though he can't see it. “No. I trust you.”

“Good. Now, what are all these texts about… you made me pull over. I have a hot date to keep.” She can hear the grin as he says the last sentence.

“What time did you leave this morning?! You should have taken your time… it's such a long drive.”

“Nah, I’ve got good coffee and let's just say I’m highly motivated to start the new quarter…”

She laughs. “Oh yeah? And why is that exactly…”

“I’ll let you assume what you will.” He laughs but gets quiet when he hears Max bark. “Are you… are you still at home?”

She sighs. “YES. My mother won’t hurry up… I’ve been ready to leave since last night.” She grumbles.

Chris laughs. “Well, that's alright. Gives me time to get settled and ready for you when you get there.”

“Ready for me, huh?” MC lowers her voice, teasing Chris.

He doesn't miss it, letting a frustrating sigh out over the phone. “MC…”

“Whaaaat…” She asks innocently.

He doesnt fall for it. “Okay, thats enough from you. I’m going to get moving again. Message me when you get close. I’ll be there in less than a minute, kay?”

She smiles, knowing he speaks the truth. “Alright… See you soon, captain.”

"I cant wait, baby… you guys drive safe.”

“You too, please.”

They hang up and MC immediately feels relieved. Even though she wanted to leave at least an hour ago, she knows it won't be long before she gets to see Chris again. She lays there for a minute before her door flies open suddenly, her mom leaning against the frame dramatically.

“I'm late, I'm late. For a very important date. No time to say ‘Hello, Goodbye’. I'm late, I'm late, I'm late!” Her mother sings, ending with a chuckle as MC throws a pillow at her head. “So ungrateful... “ She scoffs as she turns and disappears down the hall, her voice fading as she yells back. “Well, are we leaving today or what…”

MC doesn't hesitate as she jumps off her bed and runs down the hall to catch up. The drive back was pleasant, the pair discussing school, movies and books as well as other interests they share to pass the time. It makes the time fly, and MC is grateful for it. She enjoys talking with her mom, but she dearly wants to get back.

It's the first official day of winter quarter at Hartefeld. MC’s mom parks her blue SUV in one of the campus parking lots and gets out to help her with the luggage. “Brrrr! It's so cold here! Good thing I took you shopping for winter clothes, huh? Told you you’d need them.”

MC closes the passenger door and heads towards the back to meet her mom. She’s dressed in a soft grey sweater, fluffy black scarf and a dark green army style jacket with a fuzzy hood. She has knee high brown leather boots on top of her skinny jeans, helping her stay warm. Her hair's a little longer than before the break, but not enough to consider a cut quiet yet, otherwise she looks exactly the same.

As her mom opens the back hatch, MC pulls out her duffle bag and drops it on the ground, giving her mom a goofy grin. “Yup, I’m eternally grateful, Mom. And it’s not like I didn't need them at home. It’s just about as cold at our house.”

Her mom closes the door and sighs as she brushes her hands off on her pants. “Yes, I believe you are correct. I probably just miss some of the places we lived before. We had so many warmer options in the past. The were much more agreeable than our home now during the winter.” She sighs and shakes her head. “So… are you glad to be back?” MC can see the mixed happiness and sadness in her mom's eyes.

She gives her a big smile. “Of course! Partying all day, every day.” She holds her smile, trying to appear completely serious.

Her mother's mouth falls open. “Is that all you've been doing?”

MC keeps a straight face, her smile unwavering. “Well, that and petty crimes. I’m trying to stay well-rounded. It's always good to diversify you know.”

Her mother snorts at her. “Very funny. Just make sure you take full advantage of your time here, okay? These are important years.” She reaches for MC to give her a friendly pinch, but she dodges just in time, laughing at her mom.

MC sighs when she jumps far enough away, rolling her eyes. “I know, mother…”

She turns and looks around the snow-covered campus, shielding her eyes against the reflected winter sunlight on the snow. When she turns back to her mother, she receives a knowing smile.

“Let me guess… looking for that special someone?” She laughs softly.

MC shakes her head at her mother, suddenly regretting telling her more about Chris over the break. A huge grin splits her face as she looks down at her duffle. “Maybe…”

“So, is it, you know… official? I know you young people ‘don't do labels,’ but you did go to formal together. And then you guys took those two trips together, right?” Her mother prods. “I’d say that's pretty official.”

MC gives her mom a look, hoping she will drop it, as she and Chris have yet to have that type of talk. Sure they had spent hours, almost daily, talking and texting, sending snapchats and facetiming… for weeks during winter break. Not to mention their time spent together… first to California and then to the National Championship, both thanks to a Hartfeld alumni.

Her thoughts pause for a moment as details from both trips flash through her mind, her neck starting to flush towards her cheeks. There was never a good time to bring it up, at least not from her point of view so far. And even though Chris had said what he did the night before the championship, she wasn't sure if he was ready to lock down and label the thing.

“Well, if your trip to L.A. or to the championship game together is any indication, I’d say you mean a lot to him.” She flashes MC an honest smile. “Might be time to get official, MC.” She gives her daughter a playful bump, shoulder to shoulder.

Just then MC spots Chris approaching through the snow. He was right. It only took him about a minute to get there after she sent the last text. He waves at her, a big cheesy smile on his face. She immediately feels warm as his eyes roam over her body and search her face. She has been beyond excited to see him, in the flesh, again. But she had no idea it would affect her physically like this.

Her heart starts beating faster and her palms begin to sweat, even in the cool crisp air. None of it changes her smile though as it continues to grow with every step he takes towards her. She watches his chest flex under his henley, smirking to herself as she just knew he would wear it today. Chris knows how much she loves it on him, so his wearing it now is very intentional.

Her mom steps next to her and does not hide the fact that she's staring. “Wow, the pictures you showed me did not do him justice…”

MC quickly tears her eyes from Chris and glares wide eyed at her mother. “Mom! Just…be cool!”

Her mother’s eyes go wide and she covers her mouth. “Sorry!”

Chris jogs over and sweeps MC up in a big hug. She wraps her arms around his neck as he spins her around, staring into her eyes the whole time. He appears to be completely unaware of the audience next to him, having eyes only for MC since he spotted her from across the field.

MC laughs and squeezes her arms around his neck. “Whoa! Down, boy!”

Chris chuckles and gently lowers her to the ground, keeping his arms wrapped tightly around her. “Sorry… just happy to see you.” His 6’3” frame folds around her slightly shorter one, only slightly having to lower his head to make contact with her forehead as he stares into her eyes.

He loosens his grip on her, turning to face her mom, finally noticing her presence next to them. He holds out his hand and gives her a friendly smile. “Hi, you must be MC’s mom. I’m Chris.”

MC watches as her mother gushes over her… ‘Well, you can't call him your boyfriend, MC…’ she suddenly thinks to herself. She sees her mother's face become giddy as she shakes his hand.

“So handsome! And a strong grip, too…” She smirks.

MC’s face flushes. “Mom, what did I just say?! You're gonna creep the poor guy out…”

Chris turns his head to face her and tilts to the side, clearly amused. “Heh, no harm done. I certainly don't mind being called handsome.” His eyebrows pop once to show his amusement.

“I’m starting to see why MC never shut up about you the whole time she was home…” Her mom continues, causing MC’s face to flush an even deeper red as she snaps her eyes over to glare at her.

Chris turns his gaze away from her mother and back towards MC’s blushing face. “Really?” His smile expands like a sponge in water.

“I wouldn't mind hearing what she had to say, exactly…” MC watches as his mischievous eyes sink to her lips momentarily before they pop back up to hers.

MC sucks in a deep breath and grinds her teeth, quickly whipping her head towards her mother. “Agghh, stop! This meet-and-greet is officially over. Goodbye, mom.”

She starts pushing her mother towards her SUV, eager to split the two up.

“All right, I’ll leave you two alone. It was nice to finally meet you, Chris.” She waves at him as she opens her car door. “MC, make sure to call home at least once, okay?”

MC forces a huge smile and quickly responds. “I’ll do my best. Bye!”

Her mom waves one more time before getting into the SUV. “Bye, sweetheart.”

She turns to Chris and watches him flash her a cocky grin as he shoulders her duffel bag.

“C’mon, let’s get you back to the suite. Everyone’s been dying to see you.” He wraps his free arm around her shoulder, pulling her close.

“Aww… I think I need some alone time with you first…” She lifts her hand up to his chest and runs it up around his neck. She can feel him softly groan at the contact.

It has only been four days since she last saw Chris, then another three weeks before that. Well, in person anyway. They had communicated daily since they last saw each other at the dorm the day after they returned from California. She remembers how much he hated doing that, leaving her alone to wait for her ride while he began his long journey home. She made him do it though, not wanting him to get tired or have issues on the trip back. So she forced him to leave. She never let him know at the time, but she hated that part too.

He pulls her closer, nuzzling next to her ear. “I was thinking the same thing. But I’m pretty sure they’re gonna grab you as soon as you walk in the door.”

She flashes him a flirtatious smile. “I guess we’ll just have to stay out here a while longer then…” She lifts up a little to press her lips against Chris’s, running both her hands up and around his neck into his hair.

He closes his eyes and melts into her lips, only speaking briefly when they break for a breath of air. “Guess so…”

He drops her bag in the snow and leans closer to kiss her deeply, wrapping both arms around her and holding her impossibly close. After what feels like hours, they finally break apart and gaze into each other’s eyes for a long second. Chris smiles at her as he leans close to her ear, kissing her neck softly a few times.

“Let’s finish this later. Our suitemates will kill me if I keep you away from them any longer.” He quietly says into her warm skin.

MC smirks at him. “Well, I wouldn't want that.” She steps back, breaking the embrace and grabs his hand. “Let’s go say hi.”

She squeezes the same hand and he quickly scoops up her bag and flings it back onto his free shoulder. The two of them walk slowly across the campus towards their suite, enjoying their time together, hand in hand. As they cross the quad, MC spots a glamorous young woman looking around campus, clearly lost.

She makes eye contact with MC and hurries over to them as they draw nearer with an ingratiating smile on her face. “Hi there, you couldn't possibly direct me toward the faculty offices, could you?”

Chris turns to look at MC. “I think you're a little more familiar with those than I am, right, MC?”

The woman takes a step back, her mouth suddenly agape. “Hold up… you’re MC?!”

MC cautiously glances at Chris, his brow furrowed as he listens to the strange interaction. “Uh… yes.” She finally spits out, her eyebrows coming together as she studies the woman. “Do I know you?”

The stranger gives her a sickeningly sweet smile. “Not yet… but I certainly know you.”

The woman looks sidelong at Chris, a sly grin tugging at the corner of her mouth. “So… that must make you Chris.”

Chris raises an eyebrow at her, shifting uncomfortably next to MC as he gives the woman a crazy look. “How did you--”

The stranger interrupts him before he can finish as she eyes them both. “I should’ve recognized you both sooner. You're exactly like I pictured…”

She smirks. “You know what? I think I can find my own way from here. My friend just texted me directions.”

A bewildered look crosses MC’s face. “Uh… okay.”

The young woman hustles off, throwing a last lingering look over her shoulder at the stunned pair. They both watch her for a moment, waiting for her to be well out of hearing range before Chris turns his befuddled face to hers.

“Um… who was that?” He blinks a few times.

She frowns at him. “Your guess is as good as mine…”

They both watch her disappear in silence before looking at each other one last time, simultaneously shrugging and starting their journey again. They arrive at the suite to find Zack and Tyler in their usual spot on the couch, their eyes glued to the videogame on the TV.

Tyler looks up first and smiles. “Hey, MC! Long time no see!”

Zack quickly looks up and flashes her his usual grin. “Sup, doll! I’d get up and hug you and all that, but…” His eyes jump back to the screen as he tilts his head to it.

MC snorts at him and laughs. “Don't worry. I can see you're really busy.”

Chris just shakes his head and chuckles. “Have you guys moved at all today?”

Tyler suddenly looks perplexed as he tries to sort through his memories. “I think I got up to go to the bathroom? But don't quote me on that.” He purses his lips and nods.

“That's it? Respect.” MC laughs at their craziness.

Zack grins. “We’re in the zone. We’ve achieved a state of serious flow.”

Tyler bounces in his seat, clearly excited. “We’re this close to beating Yothag, Thrall of Xelia! This is the furthest we’ve ever gotten!”

MC looks at them both with endearment and a little bit of sarcasm. “I’m very happy for you both. Are Abbie and Kaitlyn here?”

Just then, Kaitlyn pops her head out from the back hallway, a big smile on her face. “MC! I thought I heard your voice… come here!”

Kaitlyn runs over and wraps her up in a tight hug, pulling her from Chris’s warm embrace. He winks at her and takes her bag down the hall to her room. Over Kaitlyn's shoulder, MC sees Abbie coming out of her room, passing Chris in the hallway, clearly excited to see her as well.

“Hey, MC!” Her shy friend waves at her with a smile.

“Abbie! Aw, it’s so good to see you guys. I really missed you over break.” She flashes them a huge smile.

Kaitlyn takes a step back and bounces a little on her toes. “Same! Now, enough small talk… Abbie has some serious gossip to share, don't you, Abbie?”

Abbie is caught off guard by Kaitlyn's sudden question. “Oh, uh…” She glances over at Tyler and tries and fails to hide a smile. “I might…”

MC can't help but let her grin spread across her face as she lowers her voice a little. “Ooh, you and Tyler? Tell me everything! I know you guys went to formal together. I assume things went pretty well after that?”

Abbie blushes. “You assume correctly.” She glances at Tyler once more before continuing. “We didn't end up meeting up over break, but we did talk online a lot. And on the phone. And on video chat.”

“Aw, Abbie! Are you two finally together for real now?” MC pauses, suddenly excited at the idea.

Abbie blushes and catches Tyler’s eye, raising her voice so he can hear. “What do you think, Tyler? Are we together?”

He briefly looks up from his game with a adorably cute grin. “Totally.”

MC suddenly taps Abbie on the arm to make her turn back to her. “Wait, video chat… no clothes or clothes?” She quietly jokes with her friend.

“Oh my god MC!” Abbie’s mouth falls open and she swats at MC.

Kaitlyn turns to grin at Abbie. “You didn't answer the question, Abbie…”

Abbie snorts at them both before she grins again. “Clothes, obviously.” She clears her throat. “It is way too soon for… that.”

Tyler perks up and looks away from his game. “Too soon for what?” He eyes her curiously.

Zack elbows him and nods towards the TV. “Dude, focus!”

Tyler looks back at the screen just as Yothag, Thrall of Xelia devours his character with one snap of his spectral jaws.

“Nooooo!” Tyler wails.

The controller falls from Zacks limp hand as he sighs and pouts. “Game over, man.” He turns to MC. “See what I have to deal with, MC? Ever since these two got back from break, they’ve been making googly eyes at each other.” He humorously glares at Tyler. “It's completely throwing off Tyler’s game!”

MC raises her eyebrow at him. “This is exactly what you wanted Zack…”

He looks at her for a moment and then shrugs, a small grin slipping across his lips. “Eh…”

MC, Kaitlyn, and Abbie sit down on the couch while Tyler powers off the game console.

“Speaking of game, hows your love life going, Zack?” MC wiggles her eyebrows as she shoulder bumps her best friend. “You and Brandon were the hottest couple at formal if I remember correctly.”

Zack quickly throws his hand up. “Oh, we’re still the hottest couple at basically any social function. Except now it's a little more ...official.” His eyebrows jump slightly at the word.

MC raises an eyebrow at him, surprised that two of her good friends are now officially seeing someone. “Seriously?”

Chris reenters the room just in time to hear Zacks news. “Nice one, man!”

Zack flashes Chris a big smile. “Thanks! He’ll be coming to our party later, actually.”

“Ooh, that reminds me. We’re throwing a party tonight. You down?” Kaitlyn turns towards MC.

MC nods at her bubbly friend, ready to start the new quarter with a great time. “Definitely.”

Just then, MC’s phone vibrates. She looks down to see a text from Professor Vasquez. ‘Looked out my window and saw you performing your characteristic woe-is-me shuffle across the quad. Report to my office ASAP.’

MC sighs and glares at her phone. “Wow, I haven't even been back five minutes…”

Her phone buzzes again, and she glances down to see a winky face emoji on screen, immediately confusing her. “What the..?”

She almost instantly receives another text. ‘Disregard. New phone. I’m not used to this contemptible touch screen technology.’

Abbie notices the change in her mood and frowns a little. “Everything okay, MC?”

MC sighs. “Only if you define ‘okay’ as Vasquez suddenly having the ability to text me orders at all hours of the day…”

She shakes her head and stands. “I guess I’d better go see what he wants. See you guys later…”

As she heads towards the door, Chris follows, taking her hand in his. “Wait up just one sec, MC…” He lightly tugs on her hand to slow her down.

She turns and looks into his eyes, curious. “What’s up?”

“I know Vasquez is expecting you and all, but… I was thinking maybe I could walk you over?” He holds her gaze and gives her a small smile.

“Plus, there’s some kind of winter festival going down in the park… There’ll be hot cocoa, live music, chestnuts roasting on an open fire…” His grin grows.

“Sounds pretty romantic, right? And we still haven't had much of a chance to catch up…” He gives her hand a gentle squeeze and rubs his thumb over her knuckles slowly his eyes searching hers.

She looks at him for a moment, watching the corner of his lip curl higher. The look he's giving her makes her toes tingle. She doesn't want to go to see Vasquez, she wants to be with Chris, wherever that is. Especially when he gives her that look. Her heart beats harder in response as a small smile appears on her lips.

“Okay. Let’s go check out the festival. I’ve never said no to hot cocoa, and I’m not about to start.” She takes a step closer to him. “And… you're pretty cool, too.”

“I’ll take it.” He grins and shifts closer, running his free hand around the side of her neck, his thumb running across the edge of her jaw as he leans in for a soft kiss.

They separate only to put their jackets and shoes on before heading outside. Once downstairs and outside of the dorm, the pair cross the quad to the park. Her arm is hooked through his, while she snuggles close in the crisp air. They stop by the frozen fountain and look down at the glistening ice. Chris turns to MC and grins as the smell of roasting chestnuts and hot cocoa reaches them both.

“It seems like a long time ago since we had a slip ‘n slide set up here.” MC stares into the ice as the memories of their first day at Hartfeld float through her mind; the first day she met all of her amazing new friends. The first day she met Chris.

“Yeah. The campus looks so different.” Chris takes a long deep breath and closes his eyes for a moment, absorbing the wonderful aromas.

MC watches him as they stand there for a moment longer before he opens his eyes and they begin to slowly walk down the main path. She has learned that this is his favorite time of year, as it was one subject they thoroughly covered during their winter break conversations. She loves that he gets so excited about the holidays, spending time with his family and friends and just the overall magic of this time of year.

While she has a good time with her own friends and family, after meeting the guys on the championship trip, MC almost wishes she could have been with him in Cherryfield over the last few weeks. His friends seem like great people from everything she’s seen so far. And if Chris is that close to them, she knows they are. Ryan and Ethan already feel like her best friends.

Then there is his family, who sound beyond adorable from all the random things Chris had told her over the break. She wants to meet them so badly, because she knows that it will help her see an entirely new level to Chris.

He finally opens his eyes and tilts his head to look into hers. “Aren't you glad you decided to come with me?”

She can't help but stare back, his deep blues pulling her in. “Definitely.”

MC glances down at the snowy path, reflecting on her memories. “I guess a lot has changed since fall quarter.” She speaks softly.

~Chris~

Chris grins at her when she looks up. “Not everything.” Chris shifts their arms to hold her hand in his, before leading her over to a nearby booth, where a student volunteer fills two styrofoam cups with hot chocolate and hands them roasted chestnuts.

Chris lets go of MC’s hand to quickly grab the offered cups and stuff the bag in his pocket. “Thanks man.”

He turns to MC and hands her a cup before they continue their walk. Clutching their new steaming cups of hot cocoa, MC and Chris walk further into the park. The soft strains of holiday music fading into the distance as they settle onto a private bench.

Chris blows onto his hot cocoa softly as he watches MC, his eyes bright with enjoyment. She licks her lips in between sips, and he watches intently. He wants to be that cup of hot chocolate right now. He wants to taste her lips, knowing they would be doubly sweet with the chocolate on them. She sees him staring and blushes a little before turning her eyes away for a moment.

“Mmm… maybe it's just because I’m freezing, but this is the best thing I’ve ever tasted.” MC clutches the cup tightly between her hands, her eyes shifting up to his briefly before she turns them away again, her expression fun and flirty.

“If you’re cold, it's the perfect time for me to give you your Christmas gift.” Chris reaches into his back pocket and produces a crinkled package. “I, uh, wrapped it myself.” He chuckles.

He hands it to MC with a lopsided grin. She holds it close for a moment, looking into his happy eyes as she takes in a long breath. She quickly looks down and tears open the paper to reveal a pair of soft, wool gloves.

“Wow… these are the softest gloves I’ve ever owned! And they’re just the right size...” She looks over to him after she puts them on, clearly impressed with how perfect they are.

“I can't take all of the credit for that.” Chris laughs. “I got them at the clothing shop where my mom works… I showed her a picture of you, and she was able to guess your size.”

He watches her face as she hears his words. He wants her to know that he’s told his mom about her, that he's confident in his feelings to not only tell his mom about her, but ask for input.

~MC~

MC’s face warms as she realizes that Chris must have talked about her to his mom after they returned from Nationals. “That’s a pretty neat trick.”

He flashes her a soft smile. “I’ll tell her you said that.”

“I didn't realize your mom works in a clothing store. I haven't really heard that many stories about your life back home…” She looks up at him sweetly, indirectly asking him for more information as curiosity gets the best of her.

“I... “ Chris frowns suddenly. “I don't like to talk about it. But, I’ll tell you anything you want to know.” He stands and offers his arm to MC.

She happily takes it and they start walking slowly down the path. As they take a few silent steps she wonders if she’s hit a nerve. He clearly isn't excited to share something, but she has no idea what it is.

She gives him a small smile, carefully choosing her words as to hopefully avoid a sore spot. “What about your family?”

Chris looks down to the ground as he begins to answer her question. “Let’s see… there’s me. My mom. My brother Kyle is 10, and my sister Jo is 8.”

MC smiles. She remembers him talking about them some over the break, but he never went into much detail. She wonders why he is so guarded. “They seem pretty awesome...”

He turns his eyes to hers, his own a little melancholy although he gives her a small smile. “They really are.”

“So you had a good break?” She raises her eyebrows as she squeezes his arm, trying to be supportive.

“It was great to see my family. It always is. I gave my little sister a game ball signed by the whole team…” He begins to chuckle. “She and my little brother promptly went outside to play with it in the snow.”

“Sounds like she's a trouble.” MC laughs.

He shakes his head and grins through a scoff. “You don't know the half of it.”

MC hesitates, sensing some tension about the one person left unmentioned. “Your dad--”

Chris clears his throat and looks up and down the path to an unknown distance. “Was a long haul trucker.”

MC’s voice becomes quiet as she looks over at him carefully, unsure what he means. “‘Was’?”

“Let’s…” Chris sighs and shakes his head, quickly replacing his frown with his normal happy smile. “...not get into that today. It’s a happy day.”

He turns to look deep into her eyes, his plea obvious inside them. “My mom, Kyle, and Jo are everything to me.”

She gives him an understanding nod and rubs his upper arm. “Can you tell me more about your hometown?”

He nods, happy to oblige. “Cherryfield, Maine. The blueberry capital of the world.”

She blinks a few times. “So why is it called… nevermind. Wait, is that why you like blueberries so much?” She grins at him, receiving the same in return as they both recall their strong blueberry muffin bond.

“Maybe?” He laughs.

“I’d love to take you there sometime. Its beautiful…” He pauses and looks away, almost as if ashamed. “...but also dirt poor. There’s the high school, a tiny downtown, and exactly two restaurants.”

He turns to look at MC, a hint of sadness swimming in his eyes. “If I couldn't throw a football, I’d probably still be there, scraping by like most of the guys I went to school with. I’m not going to lie. It was hard to be back home. Now that I’ve seen more of the world, my town looks awfully small. It’s beautiful, of course… but the people are dirt poor, and mostly unhappy.”

He stays quiet for a moment as he searches her face. It doesn't take long for his grin to grow as he looks at her. “And… of course, I missed you.”

“You did, huh?” She tilts her head, curious about his statement.

“What’s with the slack jaw?” He raises an eyebrow at her.

She clears her throat. “It’s just… I feel like I know you so well in certain ways. The two of us have had some uh, great… moments together…”

She feels her face flush warm. “But… we still don't know much about each other's past.” Her eyes flick back and forth across his eyes, trying to learn whatever she can.

Chris lets out a long sigh and looks forward again, away from her searching eyes. “Trust me, it’s not important. My past is the least interesting thing about me.”

“I’m sure that's not true, Chris.” She playfully bumps him as they walk, hoping to get some type of reaction from his suddenly stoic demeanor. “But for the sake of enjoying this date, I’m going to let you off the hook for now.”

~Chris~

When he turns to look at her with a grin she winks at him and he laughs. “Lucky me.” He watches MC, his eyes bright with enjoyment.

She can't help but giggle at his expression. “What are you smiling about?”

He clears his throat and looks away bashfully for a second before he musters up the courage to look back into her eyes and hold the gaze this time. “I guess I’m just happy. I told you. I uh…” He reaches over and covers her smaller hand with his much his larger and warmer one before he shrugs slightly. “I just… missed you.”

“We talked or whatever, like everyday… ” She gives him a curious look before she continues,

“And then there was Nationals…” They both grin cheekily at each other, causing her to full on blush and look down at their connected hands as he lets out a soft laugh.

“Okay, I missed you, too. Winter break was too long. Even with the trip last week...” She looks up and bites her lower lip as she locks eyes with him.

“Yeah I know, we did talk… and text… and FaceTime a little…” He shakes his head and laughs, his entire body shifting with embarrassment. “But it’s not the same.”

He squeezes her hand and clears his throat before changing the subject. “Anyway, what kind of stuff did you do the rest of the time?”

She looks at him for a few seconds, watching as he forces his body to relax. “Hmm, I caught up with my high school friends some, but you knew that. There were some parties… and we watched an old movie that we can't seem to let go.” She laughs. “Spent time with the family of course.”

“How did that go? Is everyone doing good?” Chris inquires with sincerity.

MC lets out a weak laugh. “It was… mostly good.” She frowns a little. “Well, the job I told you that my dad got… it was only temporary. He still hasn't found permanent work, but my mom was able to get her old job back at least.”

Chris frowns as he picks up on her demeanor. “Well, that’s good, right?”

She gives him a small smile. “Yeah… but it’s just enough to support them. She’s not exactly making college tuition money. They sold his car and had to take my little truck for now too, so he can continue looking for work.”

He takes his hand off hers to wrap his arm across her shoulders and pull her close, kissing her on the temple. “I hate to hear that, I’m sorry. But you still have Vasquez though, right?”

“Yeah… right.” She frowns.

Chris pulls her even closer, squeezing her upper arm with the hand he wrapped around her shoulders. He leans over and lays his forehead against her temple before he softly speaks. “It will be okay, MC. I promise. Just like first quarter, we will figure it out.”

She lets out a long sigh. “Thanks Chris. Sorry for getting mopey…”

He winks at her when he straightens up and she looks into his eyes. “No reason to be sorry.”

MC quickly thinks of something else to change the subject. “So, besides what I saw myself… how was your break? Did your family have a good Christmas?”

He laughs as memories begin to cut across his thoughts. “Yeah, you could say that.”

“Do you have any pictures?” She looks at him hopefully.

He raises his eyebrow and laughs. “Ayuh, I have a few…” He pulls out his phone and swipes through his photo stream.

“Here’s my brother and sister… making dinner on Christmas Eve.” He grins as he shows her the picture he took with them behind him, selfie style.

MC smiles as he recalls that night and the mess they made. She listens to him intently, smiling hard at his faint accent as he reviews the events of the night.

He turns to see her face and stops, his left eyebrow arching up sharply. “What?”

Chris then lets out a short knowing laugh. “Are you laughing at the way I speak again…”

She shakes her head. “I’m not laughing. I love it.”

“Oh, you love it…” He smirks at her as she blushes after realizing her word choice.

She tries to shrug it off, making him feel butterflies for a moment as he watches her backpedal hard. He decides that she can bring up his accent anytime as long as she continues to look at him the same way.

“Well, my family doesn't really have any accent. We’ve moved around too much over the years and they came from all over. So I uh, I think yours is... neat.”

He pulls her close. “See, I think that's neat. You're a chameleon. You can go anywhere and blend in. No one will ask you where you're from.”

“It's really not that obvious, yanno… Sorry if I’m bothering you.” She gives him a sweet half smile-frown.

“You could never bother me, MC. I love that you like to listen to my voice…” He says it in a slow, husky tone as he gives her a flirty look, making her laugh again.

He instantly knows that her laugh is and will always be, his favorite sound. Something he will forever love to hear daily. He takes the moment to nuzzle into her neck right near her ear, receiving a shiver in response, making his lower abdomen tighten in return, sliding his arm from her shoulders down around her waist as they slowly continue to stroll down the path.

~MC~

She asks to see more pictures and he obliges, scrolling through more images of his family and of course, all of his friends. Some she recognizes from FaceTime calls and from their trip to the championship. She can’t wait to meet the others and hang out with Ryan and Ethan again.

He stops on a particular picture when MC puts her hand on his. “Oh my god… you guys are so cute.”

She studies a picture Chris tells her his mom took. It’s of Chris and his siblings on the couch after they had fallen asleep together. Chris in the middle with his head leaning slightly over the back, his mouth slightly open because of the odd angle. His brother Kyle is on his right, leaning on Chris’s shoulder. His sister Jo is tucked under his arm on his left, snuggled up as close as she could possibly get with his arm wrapped protectively around her. All three are passed out, bundled tightly together, the Christmas tree sparkling in a blur behind them.

She looks up and sees Chris studying her face, a small smile on his lips. “I would love for you to meet them someday. They are great kids. Pretty sure they are going to make me look bad as they grow up…” He lets out a hearty laugh.

She shakes her head at him and pulls his arm tighter around her waist. “I don't think that's actually possible.”

A sad look crosses his face for a moment but he pushes it away and lets out a huff of air. “Heh. Yeah…”

MC picks up on his mood shift and nudges him slightly with her shoulder. He gives her a quick grin and he starts scrolling again. She jumps next to him suddenly.

“Wait! Go back!” She demands, almost knocking the phone from his hand.

He stops and gives her an odd look before he slowly starts scrolling through his pictures backwards. When he pulls up a particular shot she lunges at his phone, excitedly grabbing it with both hands. She studies the picture with wide eyes, etching it into her memory as much as possible.

“Who took this?” She holds it up to him and he laughs and looks away, a faint red tint creeping up his neck.

“Uh, Jo did… My little sis-ta.” He smirks as he leans closer and purposefully enunciates the way he says sister as MC giggles and continues to evaluate the picture.

The picture is of Chris, on a shore in Maine during a sunrise. He’s facing the barely visible sun as it creeps into view, lighting his front while the rest of him remains in a dark shadow, creating drastic contrast. His sister must have snuck up on him to take the picture, because his focus is way off into the distance, almost like he's searching for the sun itself. He appears deep in thought, but happy at the same time. She finally looks up and finds him studying her face again. This time with an odd look on his own.

“What?” She asks apprehensively.

He tilts his head. “Just curious… of what you're thinking about?”

She looks back at the picture, still holding his phone in her hands. “I guess I’m wondering, what you were thinking of here. How she managed to sneak up on you like that. It must have been something…” She looks over at him. “Do you remember?”

~Chris~

Chris lets out a small laugh. “Ayuh, I remember.” He lays on a thick accent to purposefully make her smile again while he stalls for a moment, trying to decide how, or possibly if he should answer truthfully. “Jo kept trying to get me to tell her for the rest of break after she took it. But I never told her...”

MC must sense his hesitation because she scrambles to retract her question. “It’s okay, if you um… If you don't want to say. I just think it's a nice picture…” She quickly hands him his phone and shyly looks forward, avoiding his heated gaze.

Chris stops walking then, tugging her until she stops as well from his arm wrapped around her waist. He holds the phone up in front of his face to study the picture for a moment before he shifts it directly into MC’s line of sight. He tilts his head towards her slightly, his arm tightly wrapped around her, before he speaks.

“I don't mind. If you really want to know.” He looks at her as he speaks slowly. “I was thinking of you.” He watches her swallow hard, absorbing what he just said about the picture.

She eventually turns to look at him, her voice quiet and soft. “Can I have it?”

Chris smiles warmly at her, his eyes crinkling at the corners as his happiness grows. “Of course.”

He pulls his phone back and sends her the image through text. MC smiles as she hears her phone ding with the message notification.

She unwraps herself from his arm and grabs his hand before pulling him into the snowy quad. “Come on. We’re at a winter fair! let's do some winter stuff.”

Chris gestures to a group of students knee deep in the thickest snow banks in the area. “How about we build a snowman?”

She nods and stops to look at them before turning to him. “Sure thing… but I’m fresh out of magic top hats.”

He laughs, instantly getting the reference. “Gah, I love that movie.” He chuckles. “Guess we’ll have to use our imaginations instead.” Chris hunkers down and starts packing snow together.

MC quickly kneels beside him to help. “We can use two of the chestnuts for his eyes! We can name him… Mr. Chestnut.”

Chris doesn't even try to hide his laughter, enjoying her goofy sense of humor. “Wow. How creative.”

He effortlessly lifts two sizable balls of snow onto the largest, stacking them perfectly. He watches her as she moves around the snowman, her face soft and happy, making his chest swell.

MC gives him a mock pout. “Hey! You’re going to hurt his feelings!” She packs snow between the sections, securing the snowman’s upper body and head.

Chris returns with a mock apology as he pats the snowman on the head. “Aw. Poor guy. Sorry, Mr. Chestnut.”

~MC~

MC notices Chris shivering slightly as he finishes putting the finishing touches on the snowman with his bare hands. She suddenly feels horrible.

“I didn't realize it since I was wearing gloves… but your hands must be freezing! Maybe you can wear my gloves?” She quickly takes them off and hands them to Chris.

He looks at her thankfully but gives her a sweet smile from the offer. “But these gloves are the perfect size for you. My big hands won't even come close to fitting.” He gives her a wink.

MC frowns. “Oh, yeah.”

She shakes her head and sighs, thinking of another way to warm him.

Chris gently grabs her wrists and puts the gloves back in her hands. “Please put these back on. I couldn't stand to watch you shiver. Even for a second.”

MC blushes as he holds her gaze with a very serious look, daring her to disobey. She smiles and shakes her head while she puts them back on, racking her brain for another solution. Then it hits her and she takes a step closer to him.

“Quick! Put your hands inside my coat.” She unbuttons her jacket and opens it to him as she eliminates all the space between them.

Chris looks at her with concern. “Are you sure?”

MC frowns at him and raises her voice slightly, very worried about his hands. “Just do it!”

Chris snaps to and reaches under her coat around her body, his icy hands touch her warm skin as they run along her waist, pulling the hem of her shirt up. He grimaces as she feels his hands pull the warmth from her soft skin almost instantly.

MC gasps as if the air was sucked straight from her lungs at the ice cold contact. “So… c-cold!”

Chris flinches and begins to remove his hands quickly. “You told me to do this!”

She swiftly grabs his retreating hands through her jacket and holds them to her skin as she shudders for a moment, trying to focus on something other than his frozen digits. “I… I know.”

She takes a few breaths in and out, clenching her eyes shut for a moment before she looks up to meet his very concerned eyes. She shakes her head to let him know it is okay and leans in, wrapping him with her own arms, holding them together chest to chest. He sighs and leans his cheek against her’s as they stand like that for a few minutes, his hands finally starting to warm up. She lets out a light laugh once she can start to feel his fingers move again, no longer the ice sculptures they were just minutes prior. She leans back and looks into his eyes, now softer but still full of concern.

“This is… actually starting to feel nice.” She feels Chris relax against her finally, looking at her somewhat apologetically.

~Chris~

She sucks in a quick breath as he begins to move his fingers around under her shirt, familiarizing themselves with her soft skin again. She looks deep into his eyes as Chris continues to blindly explore. He struggles not to react to the memories that start to pop into his head. Memories of the last time he touched her like this in his hotel room only a few days prior.

“I almost forgot how much I missed you touching me.” A small grin cracks across his face as she continues, “Almost.”

Chris pulls his now normalized hands out from under MC’s jacket and away from her warm skin, knowing he can't continue down this path here and now. He helps her button her jacket again as she struggles with her new gloves. She gives up with a huff and stands there, watching him dutifully button each one with a smirk, until she is warm and cozy again.

“Let’s get some more cocoa. It will help warm us up.” Chris grabs her hand and they both run back to the cocoa stand for fresh cups.

Chris takes a long sip after blowing across the top a little. “That feels so… good…” He sighs and cherishes the warm cup in his hands.

MC watches him over her own cup as she takes a sip as well. “Careful. You’re going to make me jealous of a cocoa cup.”

He lowers the cup and gives her a sultry look. “Maybe you should be.”

They both start softly laughing as they keep eye contact while finishing their cocoa, each peering over their steaming paper cups and drinking through playful grins. After a few minutes they finish their second cups and toss them in the trash as they pass by on their walk. They end up near the string quartet that begins to play a winter waltz as they move to a quieter part of the path.

Chris slows down and turns towards her, making her stop as well. He lightly cups her cheek in his hand and rubs his thumb over her bottom lip as he gazes into her eyes. His voice becomes very low as his expression turns serious.

“When I got home after nationals, I had a nightmare, you know…” He swallows hard and takes a deep breath. “In it, I showed up here today, and you didn't exist. Everything we’d shared last quarter and over the break… it had only been an illusion.”

He squeezes her hand, trying to force the panicky feeling from his body. Even thinking about it now was making him feel like it just happened, that she isn't real even though he’s holding her right now. He takes a deep breath.

“I woke up in a cold sweat, picked up my phone, and scrolled through my photos until I found one of you.” Chris gives her a weak smile.

~MC~

“Aww, Chris…” MC smiles softly at him, feeling the anxiety rolling off him, making her chest tighten as he continues.

“And then I knew you were real. And I took a deep breath and went back to bed.” He lets out a held breath of air, his bangs moving a little from the force.

He hesitates for a moment before suddenly leaning in and kissing her hard on the lips, his stubble lightly caressing her cheek. She only stays stunned for a fraction of a second from his swift invasion of her lips, quickly giving in and forcefully kissing him back in return. She can feel the power behind his kiss, his need to prove that she’s real and actually here, in his arms. So she gives it to him.

She lets him in when he asks, his tongue soft but demanding with hers. She matches his exuberance as he becomes excited with her level of participation, and she makes sure he knows it is real. She reaches up behind his neck, holding him close to her with one hand and running her fingers through the hair on the base of his neck with the other. When he pulls back, his eyes are a familiar deep blue, cutting straight through her with raw intensity.

“We… should find somewhere… private.” Chris holds her close, leaning his forehead to hers, trying to slow his breathing as he closes his eyes, forcing himself to focus.

She does the same, forcing herself to breathe slowly, trying to lower her elevated heart rate while her head spins. They hold each other tightly for a while, almost as if they are afraid they might disappear.

Disrupting their moment, MC’s phone beeps again with another text. She sighs and almost pitches it down the snowy path, knowing exactly who it is without looking. She squeezes it tightly before Chris gently grabs her hands with soft pressure, silently asking her to let go and relax.

She looks to him then, finding his focused stare as he gives her a reassuring hug. “Later tonight. We’ll make up for lost time. I promise.”

He gives her an excited smile. “I’m going to hold you to that.”

They walk back towards the quad hand in hand. They split off at a certain point on the path, each going their separate ways; Chris back to the suite and MC towards Vasquez’s office. Chris doesn't let her leave without a quick kiss to her temple as he hugs her close. MC swears she can still feel tension in him and makes a mental note to talk to him later. He glances over his shoulder at her one last time just when she does the same to him. They both smile warmly before turning back towards their destinations.

As MC walks into Vasquez’s office she is immediately addressed by the professor. “MC. What took you so long? I’ve been waiting for… Hrrrk.”

He suddenly bends over and coughs into a handkerchief. When he pulls it away, she notices a red spot bleeding through the white cloth. He quickly stuffs the handkerchief in his pocket before James can see it. James does however hear the cough and consequently finds the professor folded over.

Concern instantly covers his face. “Professor, are you--”

Vasquez quickly cuts him off. “I’m fine. James, could you get me a glass of water?”

James lingers for a moment, his eyes glancing back and forth between the professor and MC. He then frowns before nodding and walking out of the room.

MC frowns at Professor Vasquez when his eyes meet hers. “You need to tell him.”

He glares at her. “Don't you dare try to tell me what I need to do. You need to remember who's in charge here… who holds your future in the palm of his hands.”

“Well… I’m sorry.” She sighs, feeling defeated from this situation.

He stands up straighter and eyes her suspiciously. “Interesting. Last quarter, you would have barked back some insult at me. Perhaps you’re capable of evolving as a character.”

Her face scrunches up in irritation. “I’m not a character. I’m a person.”

He lets out a small chuckle. “Whatever you say…” He clears his throat and looks back down at his desk. “Back to your question. I’ll tell James when the moment is right.”

She rolls her eyes and frowns. “You mean when it causes the most drama?”

He snorts at her. “No… when I’m ready.”

Just then, the office door bursts open, and the young woman from before enters with James at her heels.

“Professor Vasquez. How nice to finally meet you in person.” She extends her hand towards him. “Let me introduce myself… I’m Yasmin Udoka.”

James quickly comes around her and places himself between them. “I’m sorry, Professor. I tried to tell her you were busy, but--”

Yasmin waves him away. “It’s my job to push for what I want, James. It’s what makes me the best agent in Manhattan.”

Professor Vasquez looks at her less than amused. “I’m afraid you're about forty years too late to sign me. I already have an agent, Charles Wallace!”

She smiles sweetly at him. “Charlie retired on Tuesday. I took over his client list and jumped on the first flight here. I used the flight to catch up on your latest book. Very provocative stuff. Especially the MC character.”

MC quickly turns to glare at the professor. “Vasquez! You actually named your character MC?”

He scoffs at her. “You should be grateful! You’re being immortalized in a work of classic literature!”

Yasmin smiles at MC in a way she doesn't like. “If half the stories I read are true, you’ve had quite an interesting freshman year so far…”

MC’s eyes narrow a little. “Oh yeah? What exactly did he write about me?”

Yasmin's smile becomes even more twisted and unappealing to MC. “Oh, I wish I could tell you, but I couldn't possibly violate Vasquez’s trust like that.”

MC glares at them both. “I guess I’ll just have to wait for the book to come out like everyone else…”

Professor Vasquez ignores her response. “On to business. What do you want, Yasmin?”

“First, a little bookkeeping We need to renew publication rights for Winter in July. That includes going digital! I’m afraid no one reads print anymore, dear…” She holds her hand up to look at her nails.

Vasquez quickly snaps his eyes up from his desk and glares at her. “Don't patronize me. Just because our entire culture’s sinking into a morass of shallow self-absorption doesn’t mean I have to help the slide.”

She walks over towards his desk, digging in her bag for a stack of papers. “All I need is your signature, Enrique. Then you can go back to your ivory tower and sneer all you want.” She holds the document out across his desk.

“I… I’m not ready to sign. I need to think about it.” He gruffly replies, quickly looking away from her extended hand.

She pulls it back towards her, taken by surprise. “What’s there to think about? Your book sales could double or even triple if we release Winter in July on digital platforms.”

MC and James share a worried look from their places on opposite sides of the room. They already know why the professor doesn't want to sign, not to mention that he will probably get upset if she keeps pushing.

“I said I need to think about it, okay? As far as I’m concerned, the matter is closed for discussion.” He gives Yasmin a serious glare. “I’d rather focus on finishing The Freshman. Hopefully it will serve as a cautionary tale to today's youth.”

MC sneers at him from her spot in the room. “Yeah… a cautionary tale. As in… never trust your professor.”

“You’ve clearly misidentified the theme of my book, MC. Whether you trust me or not is a moot point. You have to work for me.” He looks at her, his face devoid of emotion.

“So it’s a book about the way millennials are subjugated by a corrupt power structure set up by your generation?” She grinds out between clenched teeth.

“Interesting take. I like that angle…” Professor Vasquez smirks. “But… it still ignores the main character’s central flaws.”

“What flaws? I bet you can't even come up with one example.” MC is tired of holding back.

After being ridiculed as nothing other than a character in his book, pure substance for his story, she's had enough. Now she's seething.

“Actually, I’ve got half a book’s worth of examples. And by the end of the year, I should have enough to finish this thing.” He gives her a haughty smile.

Yasmin frowns. “I take that to mean, you don't have any more pages for me?”

“Actually… I’m getting an idea for my next chapter now… of course, this is going to require a bit of ‘help’ from MC and James.”

James takes a step back, his face clearly showing his disagreement with the plan. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Leave me out of this. I’m your mentee, not your puppet.”

He flashes MC an apologetic smile as he realizes what he just said. She rolls her eyes and crosses her arms as she glares at the professor.

Vasquez gives him an eerie smile. “Hear me out.” James and MC share worried looks.

“There’s a nice benefit in this for you, if you play your cards right.” He clears his throat. “Here’s my proposal: MC is going to put on James’s play, here on campus, next week.”

The other three all look at each other with shocked confused glances.

“And Yasmin here is going to watch. If she likes it, she’ll take James on as a client.” Professor Vasquez finishes with enthusiasm as MC and James stare at each other in shock.

Yasmin’s eyebrows lift as her eyes widen with surprise. “I will?”

“Think of the drama! James’s future on the line… an agent out to land her first client after inheriting a bunch of literary dinosaurs… And at the center of it all, a girl who risks losing her scholarship and getting thrown out of school.” He chuckles to himself as his eyes lock with MC’s.

Yasmin grins. “That does sound compelling. Very well, then. I accept.”

They shake hands over his desk before she turns towards James. “I’ll look forward to watching your play, Mr. Ashton. It had better be worth my time.”

MC takes a step forward, her expression showing her concern. “How am I supposed to put on a play just like that? I don’t even know any actors!”

Professor Vasquez gives her a blank look. “Oh, you won't be using actors, MC… The stars of this play will be a few of my favorite characters… you and your friends.” His eyes narrow as his grin grows.

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