#but god first it’s everyone attacking Gwen and saying she’s horrible

[kierancaz]

Ppl shipping Cahir and Ciri is absolutely ridiculous to me bc not only is he 25 and she’s 16 but SHE SAYS IT HERSELF HE TOOK EVERYTHING FROM HER.

He’s literally part of the reason her only family left died, helped destroy her home and slaughter her people, tried to kidnap her to bring her back to Nilfgaard, and then spent like the whole first season hunting her to try and get back.

[algumaideia]

An analysis of Octavian

This post was actually going to be an explanation of why I think Octavian is an antagonist, but not a villain. But it ended up being an analysis of his character. 

SPOILERS

And as always feel free to disagree with me, just be respectful. 

Sorry, because it wasn’t well-written, I’m incapable of writing good texts. 

Backstory

I think it is important to say that since we don’t have any information about his backstory most of the thing said in this part of the review are what I think is his backstory. It is a mix of the facts stated in the books, the way Octavian acts and my interpretations. Besides the things I’ll make clear that were said in the books, the rest is not canon. And you don’t need to agree with me that this was his backstory.

His family is one of the richest of New Rome- In the books he also seems to act without fearing the consequences while taking the privilege/money of his family as garented. Octavian acts like someone that is seeking attention. It is so weird how he just do whatever he wants without fearing consequences when his family is right there in New Rome. For that to happen I think or his family neglects him or they are those kind of people who think the children can do no wrong and are all my baby didn’t do that. But I think that if they were the latter, they would be more present in Octavian’s life, but they are never there. 

He is an augere and feels very proud about it. I don’t think there is too much to add about it besides that I think he likes to be an augere because it makes him important and necessary.

No one likes him and this isn’t something new. In Son of Neptune, Hazel says half of the camp hates Octavian and most of his friends are bought. So, Octavian is a lonely child. And he is aware of this. He is a bad person, people dislike him for a reason. But it seems people have been disliking him for some years and he is a child. According to his wiki he was 10 years old when he came to Camp Jupiter for the first time, and he spent his tweens and teens years in a place where people did not like him. I don’t think this was a good place to grow up.

He is really smart and manipulative. I think that those traits are a little inconsistent. Because in the beginning of the SoN Percy says how Octavian is really good at manipulating people with words, but then in the ending of the book and in MoA everyone is shutting Octavian up. Isn’t he this kind of master of words, how he isn’t answering people back? 

We also know he’s been at camp jupiter for quite sometime. I’ll talk about it in another part of the post.

He is anemic and mentally ill. I’ll talk about those things in the Camp Jupiter, Treatment and Ableism parts. 

Other thing that I would like to say is that this post is not an attempt to ignore the bad things Octavian did and pretend he is not a bad person. It is just me trying to understand his better and show why in my opinion the fandom hasn’t treated him fairly.

Camp Jupiter

Camp Jupiter sucks and it does for a lot of reasons. Some of them being the fact they have a city full of adults and most of them were demigods trained in the camp, which means they have trained adults but instead tweens and teens are the ones who fights. Hazel said that if Percy dishonored the legion they both would be executed. Hazel also says that sometimes people die in the war games. There is also the fact that people are dying all the time in missions/wars. The Camp Jupiter also expects perfect behavior for its demigods, to them all know the rules and to do not commit mistakes and I don’t have adhd but this doesn’t seem to be a good place to people that has the disorder. There is too much preassure to do not do any wrong, apperently no emotional support and the punishments seems to be crazy. It’s not a healthy place to a chldren grow up.

Other point is how they value physical strenght, hand to hand combats and offensive approache more than a lot of things. Frank said how he wasn’t treated well because he was an archer, and this was seem as cowardice. Octavian is anemic, he doesn’t have physical strenght or energy to be able to fight. The only way to be respected in Jupiter's camp is to be a good fighter, and he cannot be that because of his illness. As I said Octavian is someone that is often seeking attention and validation by his peers, and I think that this is why being an augere is something so important to him. He cannot make himself important in the traditional way and by being an augere he is necessary to the camp. People cannot just dismiss him. He buys friends, he manipulates people, he becomes a centurion, he is always dominating the senate. He makes himself impossible to be neglected. 

Yes, Octavian is power-hungry. Yes, he is bad. But a lot of things he did during Heroes of Olympus was just Roman things (he was also mentally ill and his mental health was getting worse in each book). When Hazel says that Octavian will kill Percy if the greeks atack New Rome, but in the next sentence she says that Romans take oaths very seriously. However it is all written like it is Octavian being a horrible person. But it is not. The Romans are very harsh with their punishments, they seem to be violent, physical. When Octavian says the Romans should fight the greeks, he is just acting like a Roman, like someone who was raised in a enviroment that encouraged violence responses.

Treatment

Octavian wasn’t treated nicely by the narrative and other characters. I mean, this guy was the centurion of the first cohort and an augere. But no one seem to respect him. No one enters the legion without him saying yes (I know it is acording to what he sees) but he is treated like he isn’t important. He is the one that is responsable of saying what the gods wants, but no one seems to have problems mocking him. I mean fi he decides to give you a wrong information about what a god want you are dead. 

Hazel said how “obsessed” with the sibylline books Octavian and it was framed as him being irrational and dumb. But in the end he was right, if the legion listened to him Ella would have been save way sooner. But no, it is just Octavian being  “obsessed”.

Percy acts like Octavian doesn’t have any prophecy powers, but he saw the lighting in the Jupiter Temple. Then when Octavian is mad because there are three preators he acts like he is overreacting, and Jason and Reyna do nothing. And this is weird because it was made very clear that rules are very important to Camp Jupiter. 

When he decides to attack Camp Jupiter he is always villified and not seem as a mentally ill boy that has been getting worse doing the Roman thing. 

He is always dismissed, mocked, villified, ignored.

And the fact Luke was treated with sympathy, but Octavian not. Luke, who tried to kill Percy, a childre, a lot of times. Luke, who used Annabeth feelings and emotional attachment to manipulate her. Luke, who was 19-22 years old and groomed Silena, who was 14-18 years old. Luke, who poisoned Talia’s tree. Luke, who had no regards for Grover, the satyr that saved him. Luke was treated with sympathy. But not Octavian. Not the mentally ill child who was losing the touch with reality during the series. Not the guy who was just doing what he was raised to do. 

I mean, I don’t even like Octavian and I cannot stand it.

Gwen

Guys, Octavian did a lot of bad things but killing Gwen wasn’t one of those thing. It is so no sense for a lot of reasons. 

As we talked before he is anemic and he is also smart. This intelligent man, that is full aware of his physical limits, thought it would be a good idea to get in the midle of a chaotic fight? I don’t think so.

Some pages before that Percy hit Octavian and he fell like a straw man (according to the text, the first time I read it I thought he fainted). 

Octavian always makes things because of a purpose, he isn’t just being mean because. He does bad things because his actions will give him something. Killing Gwen wouldn’t help him with anything.

Frank for some reason decided to look to Octavian during that mess and that doesn’t make any sense. He is in the camp for a month at this time the guy should’ve already known that Octavian doesn’t battle, he only commands. He saw Percy fighting for a couple of seconds during the war game and was already able to say how he fought.

Octavian was without his knive, but just minutes before he fainted, he could have lost it when he fell.

Frank said that Octavian seemed interested and not worried. But this is not enough to blame the guy, this is not enough to assume anything execpt that maybe Octavian has low empath. 

Greeks

Octavian was a roman. To the romans the greeks didn’t exist anymore, and they were the enemy. 

So, a random greek shows up, spends some days at the camp, becomes preator, and two of your most important gods appear and give a lot of attention to this greek. This is really suspicious. This greek also says that the romans should work with the greeks so they can defeat Gaea. And why you should trust this dude? He doesn’t show respect for the Roman culture. Then this huge war ship appears and this suspect greek guy says that they all come peace and the romans should not attack. Obviously you don’t believe it, and what happens they attack! As the good roman you are, your answer is to attack the greeks back. 

The romans answers things with violence. This is why Reyna asked if Annabeth was a roman after the judo flip. This is why Hazel said she and Percy would be executed if he did a mistake during his period of probatio. Octavian was being roman. He was trying to protect and revenge his Camp against a long time enemy. 

Not saying everything he did about it was logical, but this is because of his upbringing and his mental health. 

Goals

I think it is really interisting the fact that Octavian main goal was to be a hero, not more powerful. Apollo didin’t say Octavian would become preator, he said Octavian would save New Rome. 

I mean, since Octavian wanted to be preator and then became the pontifex maximum, so the logical think it would be to him wants more power. But no he wants to be a hero. A hero is someone that is respected, admired, liked and even loved. All the thing Octavian isn't. Don't get me wrong, Octavian is a bad person, there is a reason people dislike him. But he is also a lonely child that is hated by most of the camp.

Ableism

Octavian is often described as crazy, mad, insane. In his first appearence Percy said Octavian had madness in the eyes, and this was the way of the narrative warning us he was one of the bad guys. He is obviusly mentally ill, his mental health is obviusly getting worse, but everyone ignores it. Everyone ignores it, execpt when they are describing how insane his laugh is, how crazy he looks, how intense his gaze is. Everyone ignores it, until they need to remind us he is one of the antagonists. 

Ending

The ending was terrible. 

Octavian was obiously having a psychotic break, he was stumbling, laughing “in an insane” way, and he didn’t realize his jewelry was in fire. And then what happens? Michael Kahale, the person he most trusted, his problaby only friends appeared, saw the situation and did nothing.

Octavian didn’t kill himself. He didn’t know his clothes were tied in the onager. It wasn’t a sacrifice. It was an aciddent. 

Nico stopped Will Solace who was trying to warn it because some “deaths are inevitable”. Nico, also a mentally ill character saw Octavian in the vulnerable state he was and did nothing to help him. And when Nico was seeing Octavian lunch himself to the sky he thought that this was a relief. No one was sad, no one thought this was a tragedy, no one cared. Octavian was dead and that was a relief. 

The guy was so desperate to be the hero and no one even cared about his death. It is horrible.

Another sorry for the weird tense of the text.

If you want to read this is my post about Octavian and Azula and how their mental illness were treated differently.

Best regards,

Me. 

Ps. We need to start talking how the way Bryce was written was ableist.

[deadliesting]

Decorative, Dexterous, Tender, Strong: Natasha & Femininity

I. What She Was Made to Be (Disarm, Destroy)

“Femininity is depicted as weakness, the sapping of strength, yet masculinity is so fragile that apparently even the slightest brush with the feminine destroys it.” - Gwen Sharp

Look at that body, the way she can use it. It feels natural to start our thought process with this observation; it’s the first thing everyone notices. She’s curves and curves and curves and no sharp edges. It’s false. It’s carefully crafted. The sharp edges are there, holstered until necessary.  The curves curve to her advantage, sending opponents reeling. That pretty little head hides something more powerful. Her femininity makes others observe her as weak. They help her, they hesitate to hurt her. Her femininity is her shield.

It’s also her weapon. We’ve seen it- they call her a pretty face, say she’s pathetic. They make a crack about Booty Bootcamp. Bye-bye, male chauvinist. But we seldom see how else she’s used it, how she’s taken down regimes with a calculated turn of her lips, movement in her hips. Disarm and destroy. You are a woman, they taught her when she was young. Use it. One could come to understand how she finds femininity performative, especially her own. And the tender parts of what is widely considered as feminine- the caring, the comforting instinct, the clearly displayed emotions- she doesn’t exactly want those on a stage.

But masculinity- masculinity is worse. It’s all urges. Masculinity is the attacker and the attacked. Masculinity is the things she was taught to stroke and please, to keep happy until she doesn’t need it anymore. Masculinity is the black eye on the sweet lady who lives next door. Masculinity is the hand she’ll cut off if he touches something that doesn’t belong to him again. It’s the idol she was taught to worship and the church she’d like to burn to the ground. And- when it’s tempered, when it meets femininity and greets it, recognizes it, appreciates it, says oh, it’s you, hello old friend- it’s what she’s attracted to. Attracted to, fearful of, trained to both please and annihilate. Attraction is complicated. It’s all a spectrum, anyway.

II. What They See When They Look at Her (Imprison, Slander, Reform, Kill)

“This is the thing we do to women in a world of biased idolatry. Women’s stories get treated as … trademark footnotes might be: decorative, dexterous, whimsical, trivial. Pretty afterthoughts. Optional.” - from here

Winter Soldier and that girl he trained. Clint Barton and the woman who nags him. Captain America and his sidekick. Daredevil and his girlfriend who used to be bad. Iron Man and god, look at her in that skintight suit, I bet he’s fucking her. It’s not hard to assume new identities when you’re just that girl beside Him, whoever He is. Even Natasha, indisputably eye-catching, can’t escape the margins. She often finds comfort in them. That’s how she was trained, isn’t it? Make them underestimate you. Missing out on the acclaim comes with the territory. That’s all well and good. So the girl who’s never known love, never known the appreciation that comes with the hero title, she’ll go on that way. There’s no bitterness. It keeps her safe, most of the time. It doesn’t always keep her happy.

And when they do see her? They don’t understand. She doesn’t blame them. Before she did great things, she did horrible things. But the world is not kind to women it can’t understand. When male institutions fall short of categorizing, the society grows uncomfortable. Society attempts to destroy. For this reason, they’ve tried to imprison her, slander her, reform her, or kill her. Imprisonment has never lasted long. By now, slander’s like water off a duck’s back. Reforming her- well, Matt almost did. She couldn’t stand it. SHIELD couldn’t quite do it, either. And as far as killing her, nothing’s stuck yet. So they keep trying.

III. What She Is (Protect, Balance, Lead)

“Maybe that’s what we imagine it would be like to have a woman lead us. When women got into positions of power, they calibrated and recalibrated tenderness and strength, modulating and correcting. Power and love didn’t often live side by side. If one came, the other might go.” - Meg Wolitzer

A man can be stern and it’s celebrated. If a woman is stern, she’s a bitch. A man can be kind and it’s celebrated. If a woman is kind, she’s weak. We’ve heard this all before. Men can be many things. Women are forced to be one thing, and whatever that thing is, it’s less than a man. What you need to know about Natasha is that, if she must be one thing, she’s more comfortable being the bitch- hard, unmoved, unshakable. That doesn’t mean she’s heartless; she’ll use it for good. She’ll use it to make things right, to keep others safe, to intimidate on missions, and to lead the Avengers.

Because what is her other option? She’d love to be a comfort to her friends, to have kind words for those who need it. But her tenderness, her real self, has to be protected. It’s beneath several layers of confusion- stereotypically feminine looks and a damsel in distress act, stereotypically masculine aggression and skills. The hyper-feminine and the hyper-masculine are the best disguises. Because gender is a spectrum, completely feminine and completely masculine are mostly acts, She’s neither thing completely. She’s Natasha. Very few people get to meet her.

[comic-movieheroesranked]

Cinematic Comic Characters Ranked! (Year 2007) Part Two

Seven movies were released during 2007 that make it on our list! Marvel’s debut of Ghost Rider started us off, followed by the incredible action film, 300! Up next was TMNT, the list’s first animated movie as well as the return of Spider-Man 3, Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer, and Alien vs Predator: Requiem! Also debuting is the horror film 30 Days of Night. Here’s #40 through 21!

*SPOILERS ALERT FOR ALL MOVIES HIGHLIGHTED ABOVE*

40. Victor Von Doom/Dr. Doom (Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer)

"Now, let's be clear about this, shall we? I hate you."

I roll my eyes every time this guy showed up on the screen. No one else is as entitled as he is, which he proves by still only caring about his rise to power instead of the immediate threat of THE WORLD DYING. He cons and manipulates his way to get his hands on the silver surfboard and even ends up killing Sue before Johnny ends up taking him down. His death is very ambiguous so if a third movie did get approved he probably would've survived but since it didn't, I get to declare that he truly did die.

39. May Parker (Spider-Man 3)

"You start by doing the hardest thing: You forgive yourself."

With Aunt May living in her own tiny apartment now, she seems happier now that she isn't stressing over bills she couldn't pay with the old house. She still gives Peter great advice, especially when it comes to proposing to Mary Jane and forgiving Uncle Ben's killer.

38. Max Winters (TMNT)

"Immortality is a curse!"

Max Winters turned out to be the all-powerful warlord that turned his closest friends into stone. With three thousand years under his belt, it's no wonder he's managed to build himself a fortune and now has all the resources to reverse the curse back to normal. Of course something has to go wrong in the shape of his own generals betraying him so they can stay immortal themselves but luckily he gets the turtles' help at the last minute and puts a stop to the generals and end his curse once and for all.

37. Gwen Stacy (Spider-Man 3)

"I mean who gets kissed by Spider-Man, right?"

Gwen Stacy finally makes her debut as Peter Parker's college lab partner. Jesus that whole scene with the crane almost killing her gave me so much anxiety. There were, like, three separate occasions in that scene alone where she could've died. She also manages to kiss Spider-Man, not knowing that he's Peter OR that he's in a relationship with Mary Jane. You can't blame her, especially when she walks away from Peter during their date once she realizes he was only using her to get back at Mary Jane for dumping him. She even apologizes! That's a girl who understands the sisterhood so I'm glad nothing horrible happens to her.

36. Dallas (Alien vs Predator: Requiem)

"People are dying. We need guns."

The bad boy of town, it's never actually said if Dallas was in jail the past three years but it's assumed that's why he's gone. Of course he returns right as an alien infestation takes over the entire town and now he has to work with others to insure his and his brother's survival. He wasn't the best leader in terms of encouragement, he was a bit of an asshole sometimes, but his respect for Kelly, who was the true hero here, is what got them to survive.

35. Karai (TMNT)

"The Foot Clan are owned by no one."

With Shredder gone, Karai is now the leader of the Foot Clan. There's still animosity with the turtles which makes every run in a "fight on sight" type of deal. I don't know, I liked her. Her clan did what they could for cash but when things got out of hand and New York was in jeopardy, they put their differences aside with the turtles and worked with them to save the day. Her last goodbye message could've been interpreted in a couple ways. Either she's found a way to resurrect the very dead Shredder, or she's taking up the mantle herself, I just don't realize which one is the worse option.

34. Stella Oleson (30 Days of Night)

"We made it. It's almost dawn."

Stella wasn't even supposed to be in Barrow during the month-long night. But she ends up missing her flight and has to deal with awkward tension with her husband after they separated and also with a horde of blood-sucking vampires. Stella does well surving as authority to the group but is put at risk when she's stuck under a truck with a child while Marlow and the vamps burn down the town. Once everything's done, she holds Eben in her arms as they watch the sunrise, the light eventually killing Eben.

33. Flint Marko/Sandman (Spider-Man 3)

"The only thing left for me now is my daughter."

I get that we need a villain, but I didn't really buy the whole redemption thing they tried to get going for him. Yes, I understand he just wanted to save his daughter, but taking matters into his own hands cost someone their lives, accident or not. And how come at the end of the fight with Spider-Man and New Goblin did he act like he wanted no part in it once Venom was destroyed? He definitely agreed to wanting to kill Spider-Man, and he definitely almost did had it not been for Harry coming to save the day. He wanted to make it seem like he wasn't a bad guy, just was under bad circumstances, but I think he definintely was a bad guy.

32. Xerxes (300)

"I only require that you kneel."

The god-king of Persia, Xerxes is such a tall, bronze man! I'm lowkey living for his very androgynous look. What, with his drawn-on eyebrows, body jewelry AND those piercings. He might not be an actual god but he was definitely serving! As honorable as the Spartans were, there was no way they were going to stop Xerxes and his army of thousands. All he had to do was wait it out and eventually the Spartans were defeated.

31. Harry Osborn/New Goblin (Spider-Man 3)

"They're my best friends. I'd give my life for them."

Harry sort of redeemed himself for me in this movie. In a perfect world he would've gone through life without getting his memory back but that didn't last long. Both fight scenes with Peter seemed a little childish and I couldn't really take any of it seriously. What I DID appreciate is Peter telling Harry that his father never cared about him, because that's exactly what I've been saying this whole time. Harry finally gets a clue, with the help of his butler that decided to wait until Mary Jane is about to die to reveal how Harry's dad truly died, and flies in just in time to save Peter from death. He does it more than once and ends up dying the same way his father did, getting impaled by the blades in his glider. However he dies knowing he fixed things with both Mary Jane and Peter.

30. Splinter (TMNT) 

"I still got it!"

Splinter is more than just a master to the turtles, he's their father. His lessons are more than just how to be a great warrior, but how to be good soul. It was cool to see him not take the back seat when things got rough. He took down every ninja and other worldly monster that got in his way, proving this old rat had no problem keeping up with his sons.

29. Blackheart (Ghost Rider)

"Forgive me father, for I have sinned. I have sinned a lot."

The devil's son, a pure demon. He wants all the power his father has and tries to use the power of the San Verganza contract to overthrow him and take over Earth. He also has this unnecessary habit of killing people for no reason? Like, ok, yeah that motorcycle guy started picking on him, but was there any reason to kill everyone in the entire bar? In end all his killings come back to bite him in the ass after he absorbs the evil souls, allowing Ghost Rider to use his Penance Stare, which ends up killing the demon spawn using his own victim's pain.

28. Dilios (300)

"Only the hard and strong may call themselves Spartans."

The narrator of the story, Dilios proves that he has the right to stand and fight among the 300 Spartans defending their home from the Persians. During one of the battles, he takes a hit to the eye, leaving him unfit to continue. When the Greeks ditch the battle, Leonidas sends Dilios with them, to spread the tale of the 300. He does just that before going back into the battlefield with the Greeks at the end of the film.

27. April O'Neil (TMNT)

"Be careful."

She's the only girl on the ninja turtle team and probably everyone's favorite member as well. April is not just brain smart, she can also handle herself with a sword, which isn't surprising with the company she keeps. Her and Donnie's brains are the main reason the team is able to figure out what's going on and stop the Immortal Generals from taking over the world.

26. Mack (Ghost Rider)

"We were riding the gravy train on biscuit wheels before you showed up."

Mack is Johnny's manager and loyal best friend. It didn't matter if he thought Johnny was crazy for trying to jump a football field full of helicopters, once he realized Johnny wasn't changing his mind, he was fully supportive and did what he could to make sure his best friend stayed alive. His loyalty made his death hard to watch as Blackheart quickly gave him the death touch, killing him right in front of Roxie.

25. Stelios (300)

"It's an honor to die at your side."

Stelios is a man who loves war and battle and was just made to be a soldier. He treats the entire war with the Persians as sport as he has wagers against Astinos on who can kill the most Persians. He manages to cut off the arm of a Persian general before he gets whipped and is the last soldier to die before Leonidas.

24. Alien-Predator Hybrid (Alien vs Predator: Requiem)

*alien screech*

What could possibly make an alien, designed to destroy all life, more dangerous? Making it a hybrid breed with a Predator, one of the most violent creatures in the universe. Apparently, as far as alliances go, the alien side won over, as the new hybrid attacks the predators on the ship and causes it to crash into a Colorado town. It then begins implanting alien babies into pregnant women, further producing the aliens over taking the town. It's finally brought down by the Predator before being blown up by a military nuke.

23. Mephisto (Ghost Rider)

"After all, a deal's a deal."

The devil himself. Mephisto is all about making deals to take someone's soul and then double crossing them once it's too late. Johnny is his latest victim. He gets Johnny to seal his soul and agree to be his Ghost Rider as long as he cures Johnny's father of cancer. Well he does just that...then he kills him the next day by having him crash in his circus act. His evil is only matched by his son, Blackheart, who wants everything his father controls. To show his son who's boss he sicks Ghost Rider on him while he watches in the shadows. He gets his own karma once Johnny refuses to give up his powers and vows to stop all his future plans.

22. Ben Grimm/The Thing (Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer)

"I'll show you a rockslide!"

Even though Ben took the backseat in this movie as opposed to the last one, I just wanna point one thing out! It's the fact that he had not only accepted his appearance as The Thing but has embraced it in a way where he's not insecure about it anymore. Twice he changed back into his human form and didn't so much as bat an eye when he was changed back. Of course some of the credit goes to the love and support he gets from Alicia and his team, but he's come a long way and is text book definition of confidence as a superhero.

21. Donatello and Michelangelo (TMNT)

"Yeah, it looked like your mom, dude!" "Yeah that would make her your mom too, dufus."

These two make up half of the teenage mutant ninja turtles, and they're usually the fan favorites mainly because of their humor throughout the show/comics/films. They both took a backseat from their other brothers when it comes to character growth but the movie would not be the same without Donnie's brains and Mickey's horrible jokes. Plus they're side hustles as an IT and a party host were some of the funniest parts of the film.

[youremyonlyhope]

Something Borrowed

AKA Gwen takes being a pregnant bride to a whole new level.

Left off my Torchwood rewatch with A Day in the Death in December 2015 and didn’t watch the next episode. Now it’s May. 2017. Yeah I’m mad at myself too.

“Torchwood. Outside the government, beyond the police.” God I love Torchwood. Honestly that shapeshifter should have just kept going instead of attacking her. She was gonna let him go. I guess he really wanted the host to specifically be her. “Ooh” is really the only reaction you can have to waking up pregnant with an alien baby on your wedding day. “Boy would Darwin have a field day if he had made it to space.” NOW I NEED THE DOCTOR TO TAKE DARWIN TO SPACE. CHRIS CHIBNALL, GET ON THAT. I just need to take a moment to say that I’ve missed Owen so much. Why have I deprived myself of my baby Owen for the last few months? Oh Banana Boat. I’m glad this time around I noticed all the mentions of him in episodes leading up to Something Borrowed. See, I love Rhys. “Forget the money. I want you where they can look after you. Getting married today doesn’t matter.” He just wants her safe. Gwen, I love you so much, but don’t be so stubborn. Also I love Eve Myles so much. “Woah, well, look at you.” “You like it?” “Drop dead gorgeous, Tosh, and I think I speak with some authority.” GOD I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. “God you need a date. Which, this isn’t... is it?” He seemed almost hopeful. Ugh come on. These two tear out my heart. But Owen did you have to say “God you need a date” in that tone? Stop it. You go from horrible to sweet so quickly. “Oh, I’ll... dig out my dancing shoes.” That little smile he gives her when she leaves just AHHH. “We didn’t think this through.” Girl, Rhys didn’t want to go along with the wedding today so this is all on you this time. “I’m Banana, suppose you can tell why.” “You come up in spots and go soft quickly?” TOSH, I ADORE YOU. “I’m the best man.” “Evolution is full of surprises.” TOSH, I ADORE YOU SO MUCH. The note on the box says “The least we could do.” Oh Ianto. How did it take me 4 years to notice that? “It’ll happen to you one day. There’s always Owen.” “I don’t think so. ‘In sickness and in health, till death do us part.’ It’s gonna sound like a bad joke isn’t it?” Oh Tosh. Tosh in a nice dress pulling a gun out of her clutch and ordering a man to not move is my aesthetic. “Every since Owen died all you do is agree with him.” “I was brought up never to speak ill of the dead. Even if they do most of the speaking for themselves.” Love that. “Dad, this baby isn’t Rhys’.” BAD way to start that story. Ok. See. If your daughter thinks her baby is an alien, you don’t just go tell your wife like “Oh lol our daughter’s crazy” MAYBE YOU SHOULD BE WORRIED THAT EITHER 1) ALIENS EXIST AND SHE’S TELLING THE TRUTH OR 2) YOUR DAUGHTER IS HAVING HALLUCINATIONS AND MAYBE YOU SHOULD POSTPONE THE WEDDING TO GET HER HELP. “But I wasn’t late for my wedding.” “No. Barry might have got away.” YES GWEN’S MOM. “Alright, mate? I’m Banana” The glare that Owen gave him oh my god. “More like a gooseberry.” TOSH I ADORE YOU. Girl, don’t just stand there and scream oh my god. “An American with no sense of timing or fashion.” Ok. First of all. Jack is a fixed point in time. Second of all, that WWII military coat is amazing.  “Jack, I’m afraid the situation is uncontained.” Yep. Tosh, next time, don’t scream “Jack there she is!” until you’re like restraining her or something please. Or until you’re standing right behind her with your gun at her instead of both of you shooting at her in a crowd of wedding goers. Every time I watch this episode, I always wonder why Gwen awkwardly holds the bouquet. Because like, everyone knows she’s pregnant, so what’s the point of hiding her stomach? Then I remember the gun. “That’s the kind of daughter every mother must dream of. Cold as ice, packing an automatic.” Owen I love you. I just love that Rhys is like “Show me what to do.” when Owen tells him he might have to use some crazy alien tech that already killed one person and nearly killed another and blew up multiple test cups. He’s just so ready to do anything for Gwen. I love Rhys. Yeah I always hate that Gwen nearly kissed Jack in that moment. Yeah, sure, itt wasn’t Jack. But she thought it was. The look of confusion the shapeshifter gives Owen. I love it. I love when Owen’s deadness gets him out of stuff. I love that all Owen did was pin a flower to his t-shirt. “You ready to see the dead man dance Tosh?” Owen I love you. Owen and Tosh in the background leaning against the window to the kitchen and talking is just adorable. I always forget that we see Alice’s mom in a picture in this episode.

I love that episode. It, like every other episode of Torchwood, seems like it will be stupid but then it’s cute and sweet at the end. God I love Torcwhood.

And now I remembered another reason that I stopped the rewatch for a year. Because I’m almost done with season 2. And I don’t want to be done with season 2.

I might actually rewatch Children of Earth this time. For the first time since I watched it the first time 4 years ago. Haven’t rewatched it since. Because it was too upsetting. But I might... MIGHT... do it. Maybe. I might chicken out at the last minute again like I did last time I rewatched all of Torchwood.