#but fuck i am so overwhelmed my brain shuts down and i can’t figure out what to do first

[mxgyver]

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[valleyfae]

𝐁𝐚𝐬𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐈𝐧 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐒𝐮𝐧

𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐒 ➛ Guys My Age AU: Masterlist

Paring: divorced!neighbor!Bucky Barnes x reader

Warnings: soft father figure Bucky, age gap (reader’s in uni and Bucky’s in his 40s), hurt/comfort, heavy topics (indications of an abusive parent), smut 18+ ONLY MDNI, unprotected sex, creampie, oral (male receiving), lots of praise, dirty talk, and teasing. Bold italicized text is from the reader’s journal or past!!

Synopsis: You can't seem to keep your plans straight or your hands off of each other.

Word Count: 3.5k words

Authors Note: I have finally decided to update this fic, and I am so sorry it took so long. This part was supposed to be double the length, but I split it in half to post something now until I am happy with the second part. Enjoy!!

𝐅𝐄𝐄𝐃𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐑𝐄𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐒 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝

𝐌𝐀𝐈𝐍 𝐌.𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ✴︎ 𝐒. 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐍 𝐌.𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ✴︎ 𝐍𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐆𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍

You’ve been awake for hours.

The bright rays of sunlight sneak through the narrow opening of the cream curtains that lightly sway in the summer breeze. The ashamed feeling of disgust still sunken deep into your heavy chest. Brain fuzzy, limbs weak, stomach cramping, nausea taking over your body as you groan. 

You tiredly stretch; the feeling of your cotton sheets is the only comfort you’ve gotten since Bucky held you in his safe arms. The sunken bags under your eyes become more apparent every day you go without him. 

Falling back into your drowsy state, chilling goosebumps creep down your spine. Yet, no matter the temperature, all you can feel is the isolation and the guilt you somehow manage to carry, blaming yourself for the actions others make. 

A sudden buzz from your phone instantly snaps you out of your hopeless mood. Too lethargic to check your messages, you ignore the notifications. A second buzz vibrates against your wooden bedside table. Tiredly you lift your hand out from under the covers. You squint your eyes as the bright screen inflicts your tired vision.

Dad - 9:27 am

About to leave for my business trip

Dad - 9:29 am 

Your keys are in the kitchen

His texts give a clear indication of what will be happening.

What always happens. 

You can’t deny the sick feeling that stirs your stomach from normalizing his apathetic customs. Dropping your phone onto your burdensome chest, you have zero reaction to the thump of the heavy glass screen on your exposed skin. 

You huff out, grief crawling under your skin. As you pull your covers over your face, you hear yet another buzz, your phone buzzing on your skin. "Shut up," you irately mumble into your soft duvet.

Carelessly, you sit up, sick of seeing your father's name. You quickly glance at the message, not bothering to see what it says, immediately throwing your phone back onto the sheets. 

Freezing your movements, you furrow your brows in confusion. 

You sit fully up for the first time this morning. Leaning against your headboard, you sink your teeth into your bottom lip to collect yourself from the lingering worries built up through your restless night. Nervous excitement washes the sullen expressions off your face. 

Your heart beats at a pathetically fast rate from simply seeing a notification.

Butterflies swarm your stomach, filling your throat with apprehensive nausea. Oh my god, just look at the fucking message. You take a deep breath, inhaling the sweet fragrance of the candle that lingers around your room; building up the courage, you open Bucky’s text.

Bucky - 9:31 am

Good morning, sweetheart! I hope you got a good night's sleep and got some rest. If you want to come over, I’ll be at my house. I just need to finish a little work but come whenever you want. There is a key behind the plant pot :)

Overwhelmed, you feel a sense of consolation as you read Bucky’s text repeatedly. You drag your hands down your face, shaking off your last bit of exhaustion.

It’s a little pathetically how a straightforward text Bucky probably wrote without thinking could bring you this much joy.

Stretching your sore muscles, you take your time to get out of bed – following the bright shine through the curtains, you pull them open to the sound of your father’s car dragging against the gravel. You turn your back to the window, take a deep breath, and push away your negative thoughts. 

You spend the next thirty minutes getting ready, taking your time to feel the hot water run down your back. You gently rub the sweet vanilla scent across your skin, wincing as your fingers skim over your bruises and sore muscles. 

Overcome by the debilitating urge to rush next door, you hastily gather your journal and headphones, knowing Bucky will be busy for a bit – you don’t care how long it takes him. 

You slip into a pair of shorts, the distressed denim skimming your legs, and the cotton of your old band-tee loosely hangs from your shoulders.

The warm breeze hits your skin as your shadow follows your restless steps until you reach the familiar sight of Bucky’s front door. 

You follow his expected thoughtful notes, involuntarily smiling as you pick up the cold key from the shade behind the potted plant, dragging the tip of your finger against the sharp ridges of the metal and taking a breath before gathering your overly excited body.

Carefully opening the heavy door, you step inside. The perfect type of silence and captivating scent flood your senses. Just being in Bucky’s house felt safe. The calm, sleek modern features hold a refreshing atmosphere that radiates the most precious feeling. 

As you step out of your untied Converse, the silence breaks. A faint purr draws you to the couch, and your giddiness heightens.

“Hello, pretty,” you coo, sitting beside the snow-white feline. “Don’t you look comfy?” Then, with one hand tenderly stroking Alpine, you pull your pen and journal out of your canvas bag.

Curled beside you, Alpine’s eyes flutter shut. “You have the most beautiful eyes, just like your dad.” She purrs in response closing the slight gap. “The most beautiful blue eyes.”

Your soft smile melts into a somber gulp as you take out your journal–leafing through your messy notebook and skimming over your prior writing. Lump forming in your throat, you hinder your light flipping of the pages and blankly stare at your words from the previous nights. 

The rivets of dried tear stains scatter your notes like the cuts and bruises fading from your skin.

The painful pages of burden. Every word, hit, insult, ingrained in your memory, the agonizing pluses, the claustrophobic beating of your heart, the fearful tremors, the salty tears slipping through the passage of your lips, manipulated to insanity, exhausted and delirious.

Bottled-up emotions flooded onto the pages of your journal – forever stuck in the cycle of shock, fear, denial, anger, and hopelessness. The stiffly chained pattern has never broken before.  

You never expected to feel any sort of safety.

Shame is always significant, always present, lingering in your mind, but the way Bucky cradles you in his strong arms brings you the comfort and acceptance you never expected, ever. The mounds of self-doubt that control your life slowly dissipate with every second you spend with him. The feeling he gives you is so foreign, and there are not enough words to describe it. The way he holds you in his arms. He’s nurturing. He feels like home.

The desperate longing for someone – that someone, perfect with all of their flaws and broken pieces. That person who will mend your fragile, fragmented mind, body, and soul. You never thought you would find the person, but with Bucky, it is finally starting to feel real.

You’ve never felt joy reading through your journal, repressed memories surfacing, haunting your every moment. Well, not until the night you spent the night at Buckys.

He is perfect – every part of him. 

“Sweetheart?” Bucky calls, a deep and gentle voice echoing down the stairs. His eyes land on the precious sight below him, and he gushes.

Longing gaze snapped back into reality, turning around and stuffing your journal in your bag. “Bucky?”

Nimble fingers rubbing through his beard, scratching the nape of his neck, he teases, taking his last steps to the couch. “Bunny?” kneeling, he tenderly pulls you into a hug, stroking Alpine when she lets out a jealous meow.

Walking down the hall, Bucky guides you into his bedroom. Thoughts mirroring yours, he stops you, gripping your chin between his fingers. Limbs intertwining and heavy breaths mingling, his soft lips skimming yours.

“Miss hearing that flustered hitch in your breath,” he whispers against your lips. “Perfect little girl’s all mine.”

You huff, nuzzling your heated cheeks into his buff chest. “Miss everything about you,” your words muffle against the black cloth constricting Bucky’s muscular figure.

Silence has never been more beautiful, cradled in his arms. Tension building with no fear, just desire.

“Got you something,” Bucky smirks.

Letting out a faint whine, you look up at Bucky, urgently wrapping your arms around his neck. Dwindling patience at an all-time low, heart rate climbing, Bucky welcomes your lips. His tongue glides pasts yours, syncing with the motion of your body as you cling to him.

“I got you a swimsuit,” Bucky whispers into the kiss. “Can go swimming this time, not just— God,” he curses under his breath when you playfully suck along his jaw.

“Not just… fuck me?” you pull away, surprising yourself with the way your words blatantly slip out of your mouth.

Bucky laughs, mockingly pulling away and laying a kiss on your forehead. “Someone’s got a dirty mouth today,” he chuckles, cupping your cheek.

With another sheepish grin, you follow Bucky down the hall, patiently swaying in your seat; you wait for him to bring you the swimsuit he found while in his suit.

Confidence in his step, Bucky tenderly smiles, holding out a cherry red one-piece.

Throat abruptly going dry, the customary throb radiates heat through your jean shorts. Hesitation stirs in your stomach–nervous nausea blocking your airway, cutting your breath short.

I’ve never felt uncomfortable around him. He’s never commented on my body, never drawn attention to my bruises and scars, and never made me feel weird for the horrendous way my eyes get puffy and face blotches when I cry. No one has ever made me feel the same as he does or made me feel good about myself. So does he care or only pity me because I’m just that pathetic? I don’t want him to worry about me. I don’t want him to think I just want attention. I don’t want to feel even more ashamed of myself. I just want to keep pretending that life is perfect, like how it is when I’m with him.

“I’m not the best shopper, aren't I?” Bucky sarcastically snickers, lightening the worried expression on your face.

“No, no, it’s just a little red?” you giggle, pushing your stresses aside. “I love it!”

Smiling up at Bucky, he takes your place, sitting on the linen couch. The soft chuckles of banter gone silent, you timidly undressing to rapidly put the swimsuit on. Tense arms hidden behind your back, you fidget with your fingers, eyes following the pattern of the wooden tiles.

Tongue swiping across his velvety yet slightly chapped lips, his large hand grips your discarded clothes. “Bunny?” his tone sweet and delicate, melodically humming with the blowing wind that ruffles the curtains.

Hands molding to your shoulders, he coos, “Take a deep breath for me.” Chaos constantly cluttering your mind, you follow Bucky’s instructions, giving him your vulnerability. “You don’t need to be scared of me. I’m here for you, no matter what.”

All you can do is nod, leaning into his warm embrace.

*ೃ༄

The summer sun beats down on the two of you as you agilely trace patterns down Bucky’s abdomen, centimeters away from gliding over his shorts. You shift lower in the sun lounger, intertwining your thigh around his leg.

The nervous lump thumping in your chest falls, adding to the pulse radiating off your clit and breaking the stop to your restlessness, gradually bucking your clenched hips as your nose brushes the thick trail of hair that travels beneath the waistband of his shorts.

“Feeling needy, bunny?” Bucky smugly chuckles, placing his book down and his colossal palm on your head instead. “No need to act shy; been teasing me, wiggling in those little red bottoms.” 

You tuck your head, and your flustered instinct kicks in, nose pressing against Bucky’s bulge; you whimper, realizing your position and rising embarrassment.

“Did so good for me last time. I’m still here to help but fuck.” Bucky tenderly rests his palm on your cheek. “Gonna get me hard just thinking about those soft lips wrapped around my cock, looked so pretty, so innocent sucking on my balls. Most perfect sight I’ve ever seen.”

The temperature of your face increases, but that doesn’t stop your body and your racing thoughts. Vivid images flood your memory of the first time you gave Bucky head, the first time you have ever given a man head. 

The one time has left you with a ravenous craving for Bucky, a desperate yearning to please him, the vague taste of him ingrained in your imagination every second that goes by, and it’s intoxicating.

“Can I?”

Looking up, you admire Bucky's defined abs, perfectly sculpted biceps, the bright sunlight glimmering in his crystal blue eyes. A comforting aura emits from his words, breath, and presence; that feeling of safety mixed with passion curates his effect on you, the lust that flows through your veins, leaving you writhing for friction.

You sit up, putting your weight on your heels – pressing against the emerging wet patch on your red bikini. “You know, um….” you mumble, eyes subconsciously drawing to Bucky’s bulge.

He shifts up, spreading his thighs, establishing a space for you to lay. “We have an eager little girl today, now do we?” Bucky chuckles, cupping your cheek and pressing a kiss to your forehead, savoring the feeling of his soft, blush lips on your skin before he pulls away, his gaze piercing through your eyes with a gentle smile. “You’re gonna make me crazy,” he murmurs.

Licking your lips, you tug the supple flesh with your teeth; anticipating his following instructions, you center yourself and lay your clammy palms on your legs, exhibiting your restlessness with a subtle pout.

Intertwining his fingers with yours, he guides your hands to his growing bulge. “Don’t worry, bunny. I'm here.” The trembling of your wrists dies down as Bucky reassuringly moves your shaky touch to a steady pace. “I got you.”

Slipping your fingers past the band of Bucky’s swim trunks, you pull them down his hips, gaze apprehensively shifting from Bucky’s alluring eyes to the expanding path of hair you’re gradually exposing.

“Lemme just,” Bucky grumbles, freeing his strained erection and aching full balls from the polyester. A content sigh washes over him as you finish taking off his bottoms.

Sinful and tainted, you cave in, your mouth watering excessively as you attentively watch Bucky wrap his fingers around his thick base. “Go on and lay down for me.” 

You hastily shift into the spot between Bucky’s muscular thighs, timidly placing a hand on his olive skin. “There you go, pretty girl’s so smart,” Bucky croons, his palm smoothing over your temple.

Your fingers barely conceal Bucky’s staggering girth mimicking his form seconds before; you glide your tongue up his shaft coating him with an abundant amount of your drool, all while maintaining hankering eye contact. His distinct, musky taste seeping into your taste buds, the feeling of his jutting veins intoxicating, you let out a content hum. Following your steady path, you kiss Bucky’s bulbous tip; a faint moan vibrates off your puckered lips, drawing a deep grunt from his chest.

“You see how hard you make me? Fucking hell, don’t need my help at all. So good for me—” Bucky groans, guiding your head down, pushing himself past your glistening lips. “That’s my girl.”

You immediately gag, glassy eyes building tears, your body’s natural response seeming hostile, but it’s your favorite feeling.

Both hands tentatively wrapped around him, the tip of Bucky’s cock prods the back of your throat—drool seeping past your lips, cascading over your tense knuckles.

Bucky's words meld into satisfied grunts, his chest heaving to the rhythm he enforces with his hand pressing down on the crown of your head. “Always take me like a champ,” he hisses through gritted teeth. “Don’t you, bunny?”

His pulsing tip pummels down your throat, pushing your head down further, and a perfectly sculpted outline of his cock shapes down your neck abundantly. Copious amounts of saliva coat your chin, running down your chest and creating a glistening pool to glaze over the cushion below you.

Encouraging groans flow from Bucky’s lips as he digs his pearly white teeth into his plush red lips. His eyes locked on yours, the plentiful strands of silver that weave through his hair, glimmering in the sunlight.

The thump in your chest drops between your legs. You urgently clamp your thighs together, helplessly clenching your muscles in an attempt to fulfill the ache exuding heat from your neglected clit. You sync your needy movements with the tempo Bucky set with his hand planted on the back of your head. The repetition of your self-inflicted grinds rapidly builds a coil in your stomach.

Bucky frees you from under his grasp, stifles the tempo of his thrusts, and pumps his cock. “There she is,” he groans. “Shit. Making me feel so good.” 

Increasing the speed of the rough buckling of your hips, Bucky continues to praise you as your drool-painted lips connect to his full heavy balls. His stare drops from your watery eyes to your hips, needily grinding onto nothing. “You don’t need my help, doing amazing. Love it so much you’re humping the air, aren’t you, poor thing?”

The sound of your gags is replaced by your pleading whimpers, which have become more and more substantial as you borrow your nose further against Bucky’s base, his balls drawing up as you slurp your excessive drool.

“Come here,” Bucky motions, soothingly rubbing your free hand on his thigh. “Help me cum – need to feel that pretty cunt wrapped around my fingers. Need to show my girl how proud of her I am.”

Responding with a confused hum, Bucky cups your cheek, gently guiding you up, patting the cushion; he stabilizes your trembling legs, straddling your thighs so you’re hovering over his cock, harder than ever.

He patiently hooks his dexterous fingers around the vibrant fabric, revealing your puffy clit.

He catches your keen gaze, eyes following down to your eager pout and back to your cunt, skimming your mound with his digits. Struggling to form a sentence, you reflexively roll your hips, internally screaming, begging for Bucky to speed up his sly gestures.

His soft chuckles fuel your neediness, but before he can get his words out, you huff, “be patient. I know, I know.” Digging your fingers into his biceps, you giggle, mirroring his smile.

Swimsuit fully pushed to the side, Bucky slides his tip between your folds, teasing your entrance. “Using my words against me,” he rebuts, moving his hands and securely gripping your waist. “You know I’m right. I always make you feel good.”

Playfully rolling your eyes, you whimper under your breath, “Bucky.”

Feeding your restless state, he slowly slips you down onto his length, stretching past your entrance.

As much pleasure as Bucky has brought you in every other position, this foreign fluffiness and a false sense of control is startling yet exciting. Bucky’s steady thrusts, combined with your frantic bounces as you rock your hips, almost instantly bring you to your climax.

“B-Buck–” you mewl, embarrassment and pleasure clouding your senses. “Please, I’m- I’m….” Squinting your eyes shut, you arch your back, tensing your muscles.

Maintaining his authoritative grasp on you, Bucky attaches the pad of his thumb to your clit, pulling a squeal from the back of your throat. “So quick,” he scoffs, breathlessly moaning himself. “Look at me, bunny.”

You collapse onto Bucky’s chest, tired and helplessly chasing the rapid thump in your abdomen. “Feels s-so, feels so good.” Brows furrowed, you open your heavy lids, holding back your release until Bucky reassures your pleas. “Can’t hold it, can’t hold it.”

Desperately squirming on top of Bucky, you press your parted lips to his, panting into his mouth. “Go on, cum for me.”

You let go, moaning as you jolt forward, embracing Bucky’s pace, clinging to his frame, letting him take complete control. “There you go—” Bucky’s words get increasingly gravelly as he feels himself climaxing.

His hot breath cascades down your neck–the heightening, deep, harsh snaps of hips let you know he is close. “B-Bucky, please. Please c-cum in me,” you breathlessly mumble.

“Fuck, bunny.”

Bucky holds you close, soothing you from the bliss. He isn’t thinking about anything else besides you in his arms. He lets you bask in the comfortable silence as the pulse between your legs ebbs away until all that is left painting your sensitive folds is his smooth seed that you begged him to fill you up with.

Keeping your clammy cheek pressed to his beating chest Bucky reaches for one of the pool towels he had brought out to clean up to the best of his abilities.

“Said we were swimming, and you wouldn’t just fuck me,” you murmur, voice still raspy as you pull yourself out of the hazy aftermath.

Bucky chuckles as he lays the towel back down. “Really are using my word’s against me today, aren’t you?”

“Uhmm,” you happily hum back at Bucky, shifting up to press your buzzing lips back onto his.

𝐉𝐎𝐈𝐍 𝐌𝐘 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

I want to say thank you for all of your sweet messages on my form. They all mean a lot to me, and I wish there was a way for me to respond. I hope you guys enjoyed the fic. Sending my love.

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[captawesomesauce]

Thoughts at 2pm..

This is not a complaint... this is just my attempt to understand and get the thoughts out of my head and make some sense of something. 

W is an amazing woman, an amazing partner, an amazing friend. I’m lucky to have her in my life, so what I’m going to say isn’t a criticism... 

She’s really bad at organization at times. 

She gets overwhelmed, she gets frustrated, she shuts down. 

And it’s important to acknowledge that it has nothing to do with being messy, or lazy, or any of that shit that parents scream. Some people have real difficulties with this kind of thing. 

As far as I can tell, she just cannot look at stuff and space and figure out where to put stuff IN space. There’s often too much stuff, and even if there’s enough space, there is a barrier to her being able to function in a way that leads to accomplishing the job.

An example is packing of boxes. My brain tells me to keep like items together, to pack them in a way that protects them and to go slow and steady until it’s done. 

Watching her, it’s just a matter of throwing in as much stuff as she can, without regard to what, or how, just to get it done! The more time goes on, the more she has to just throw and go faster!

With unpacking, it’s pretty much the same. She did the kitchen, which meant the counter tops were all covered in stuff, the drawers were full, the cupboards too. The problem was... it was unusable throw and go. Nothing was stacked nicely, nothing was where it should go for convenience, things weren’t even taken out of bags or boxes. There was a great big bag of “snack food” just sitting on the cupboard. I asked her why? She said she didn’t know where to put it, so... it went there.

There were small plates mixed in with big plates, stuff just shoved in drawers without any rhyme or reason, and it... was bad. 

It was unfunctional as a kitchen.

And I’m not saying this to harp on her, I’m saying this because I am learning how to work with that.

I’m learning that when she told me she never ever unpacks, she just leaves things in bags and boxes when she travels/moves... I’m starting to understand why that is. 

If you ever saw my rooms, you’d know I have a minor issue with that as well. I get overwhelmed doing things because of my dysgraphia and other issues. 

What I do that overcomes that is that I have to make piles. I have to sort, and sort, and sort some more. Because if things are with like things, I can find them later! I need there to be some sort of pattern/grouping or I’m fucked. 

What also helps is to have a runner. I can sit in one place in make my piles, while someone else grabs stuff for me, or moves stuff, or packs/unpacks. Because when I start moving, and getting up/getting down/moving left and right, and stuff... i get so exhausted, I hurt, and I can’t function. I end up just throwing and going too. 

But with help, I don’t reach that mental breaking point.

And I’m finding with her, we work well as a team where she can turn off her mind and just sort of follow directions. 

Things really go well when I say, put that stuff in that drawer, take that stuff out of the bag, put it on the second shelf in the far right cupboard. Take all of the cleaning stuff and put it under the sink. She just does it, and it makes sense and it she doesn’t feel overwhelmed and neither do I.  Same with cleaning... you wipe down the counters, I’ll clean this stuff... boom... done. If I don’t give those directions, she walks into the room, sees everything... and hits that mental crash.  So i’m working harder to work with her... to give those directions, to help her not hit that crash, without me having to do everything which leads to me crashing... we’ll just do it together!

[cherubicwitch]

want to be desired and desirable but I also am thoroughly repulsed by my own being and existence, feeling as though I’m simply a tangled mess of underprocessed emotions that will never see the light of healing and acceptance. im guilty for existing, everything will always be my fault. I am both never good enough and yet too capable to not be used. have two degrees yet part-time jobs elude me. always a second choice. can’t even consume any kind of spicy media without wanting to tear out my insides bc I can’t help but to compare myself to everyone and everything around me. constant nagging thought of “I’m sure that she’s much hotter than me/thicker than me/sexier than me/more interesting than me/not as weird as me/softer than me/quieter than me” every time and it sticks in my brain as I think of more stupid shit that I thought I was done being upset about. I’m only just convenient and nice and subservient and I don’t know how to be any other way, so I sit. and wish that a tragedy out of my control takes me away so I can be done. so I can be a good dead wife a good dead sister a good dead daughter a good dead granddaughter. so everyone’s expectations of me can go away and no longer apply to me. so I don’t have to feel like I’m drowning and numb and yet overwhelmed with every emotion that a human can possibly bear all at the same time. so I can probably finally get an apology from someone as they stare down at my grave, maybe someone will say it out loud maybe someone will mean it maybe someone will beg for my forgiveness bc they know they hurt me. as a subservient kind and forgiving woman, no one feels like they really need to apologize bc I do forgive. and I always will but I just want someone to feel bad for hurting me and wronging me and I don’t think I’ve gotten very many apologies ever in my life. I’m supposed to just move on and forgive but where is remorse? no one is ever sorry for what they did, just sorry for getting caught or sorry that I felt that way. idk I have too much in my head and so much abuse from years that I’m trying to undo my horrible bad habits but fuck is this hard. it’d be so much easier to bury myself. I don’t know if I deserve any of this. I hurt people too from being a constant victim and passenger in my own life. I’m trying to fix that but it comes with being more connected with your emotions and not just pushing them aside and pretending they don’t exist bc you can focus on something or someone else. so now I’m trying to let myself feel things but holy shit it’s so much and these emotions are so big, idk what to do with them. but then I feel guilty for feeling. then I shut it down again and apologize for my outburst(s) and try to go back to normal bc I’m sure no one else around me wants to figure my bullshit out either. everyone else has their own problems, I shouldn’t burden them with me and my stupid emotions and issues.

[waka-chan-out]

Ok concept/request, you're riding Iwaizumi in the Aoba Johsai locker room and Oikawa walks in on you two and you feel like everything is about to get really awkward, but then Iwaizumi asks if he could join in?

(I ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤ your stuff so much btw!!!!!!!)

Cool Down

i am OBSESSED with this idea. y’all know how much i like writing multiple characters, huh? 👀 sorry for taking so long on this but thank you for sending in a request! i’m flattered you like my content baby i hope you’re doing well

i exclusively write post-timeskip characters so i’m going to change this to argentina national team oikawa and athletic trainer iwaizumi if that’s alright :) but the concept shall remain the same.

word count: 2k

content warnings: she/her afab reader, established relationship, threesome, oral (m. receiving), double penetration, “sir,” “good girl,” LOTS of pet names, ass play, very low risk public sex, light teasing, light dacryphilia, creampie

You could still hear players shuffling out of the arena from the locker room. Tooru had told his team not to wait up, that he was going to stay and catch up with old friends. Instead, he had pulled you into his team’s deserted locker room and pushed you against the cool concrete wall, too hyped up from his game to even manage a shower.

Somehow that made it even hotter as you tangled your fingers in his lovely blue jersey, holding on as tight as you could as you shifted up and down in his lap.

His breath rushed heavy into your ear, face screwed up in pleasure and pressed into the crook of your neck. Both of you were so wrapped up in each other that the ability to speak was stripped away entirely, leaving behind pants and groans and the occasional high pitched moan.

Your brains and bodies were occupied, and that made it impossible to hear the locker room door clunk open and the heavy footsteps approach the back row of lockers.

“Oikawa.”

The voice fell like a bucket of cold water. You couldn’t run, so you clapped your hands over your face and buried into Tooru’s shoulder. Shit. Shit. Shit.

Tooru turned around, an exhausted smile on his face.

“Iwa-chan.” He let out a cough, unable to catch his breath. “Thought you would’ve gone home by now.”

“I figured you’d pull something like this.”

“But you won’t tell, will you? Because you’re our good little Iwa-chan.”

Iwaizumi’s face screwed up in disgust.

“I wasn’t going to tell as long as you were in a generous mood.”

You perked up.

“What?” you asked. Iwaizumi crossed his arms.

“Shitty-kawa needs to learn how to share if he’s going to make a mess in our locker rooms.”

Your eyes grew wide and Tooru laughed.

“I don’t know whether to take you seriously or not, Iwa-chan.”

“I could just report you.”

“I didn’t say no, but I’m not the one you have to ask.”

They both turned to face you and your mouth grew dry.

Scanning Iwaizumi’s body, you couldn’t say you’d never thought about it. The few times you had met Tooru’s Iwa-chan in person he had such a presence around him. No matter how out of control Tooru got, Iwaizumi held the reigns, able to shut situations down in only a few words. Not only that, he was almost infuriatingly good looking. His uniform polo looked uncomfortably tight around his chest and biceps, and that’s not even mentioning the way his legs fit into his dress pants.

You wanted his arms around you. Immediately.

“Does the door lock?” you asked. Tooru grinned.

“I knew you were fun,” he said, pressing kisses to your neck. Iwaizumi’s lips curled into a smile and he disappeared for a moment. You heard an echoey click and he returned, already pulling his belt out of its loops. Tooru laughed again.

“Cocky, Iwa-chan. At least get them warmed up first.”

Iwaizumi approached you, continuing to undo his slacks.

“I think you’ve already taken care of that,” he muttered, pushing down on Oikawa’s shoulder so he would laid down on the bench. Iwaizumi leaned down and pressed a gentle but warm kiss on your lips.

“You’ll be good for me, right?” he whispered as he pulled down the front of his briefs. You grinned and tugged him closer by the belt loop.

“Yes.” You punctuated the word by wrapping your lips around him. He was slightly shorter than Oikawa but significantly thicker. You looked up at him and took him as far into your mouth as you could.

“Shit,” he breathed, cupping your chin and running a thumb over your cheek. “What did you do to bag this one?”

Oikawa laughed and laced his fingers behind his head.

“I’m very charming, Iwa-chan. You should know that by now.”

You smiled as much as you could with Iwaizumi’s weight still in your mouth. He looked down at you and combed your hair out of your face.

“Wanna make him shut up for me?” he asked. You became keenly aware of the fact that Tooru was still inside of you and circled your hips. He hissed and tipped his head back against the bench.

“Mean, Iwa-chan,” he gasped. You continued a steady rock in his lap and he let out small, sharp breaths, trying to remain composed as he watched your eyes focus on Iwaizumi’s. “Don’t push her head,” he warned. “She doesn’t like that.”

“Yeah?” Iwaizumi said. His hand cupped your face, gently following your movement as your head dipped and pulled back. “You don’t like when he shows you what to do, huh? What if I show you what to do? Will you let me?”

He pulled you off of him, gently swiping at your lip to clean your face. He pushed his index and middle past into your lips, dragging them over your tongue. You closed your eyes at the feeling and you heard him let out a content laugh.

“That’s my girl. Why don’t you bend over for me?”

You quickly leaned forward so you were laying on Tooru’s chest.

“You really are an obedient little thing, aren’t you?” he said, running a hand through your hair. “Why don’t you behave this way with me, hm?”

“Because you don’t command any respect,” Iwaizumi grumbled. He ran his hands over your ass then down, circling your entrance. You gasped and held Tooru tighter.

“Don’t act so shy,” he said through a laugh. “You’ve done that before and you know you like it.”

“Oh? Is that true?” Iwaizumi asked. You nodded, but he ran his hand over the back of your neck and tugged your hair lightly. “Words, darling.”

“Yes,” you stammered. He chuckled and unceremoniously pushed a finger inside of you. You let out a choked moan and pressed your face further against Tooru’s chest.

“Aw, Iwa-chan, be nice.”

“I am being nice. Feels good, doesn’t it doll?”

“Y—” You paused as Tooru leaned up to your ear.

“Call him sir. He’ll lose it.”

Iwaizumi landed a quick smack on your ass and pushed in another finger.

“What did I say about your words? Does it feel good?”

“Yes, sir.” The words were rushed, nervous. You were sure Iwaizumi could hear the hesitation in your voice, but the low groan that left him was assurance enough.

“Oh, fuck. What a good girl.” You could hear him readjusting his pants and gasped when he pressed up against you from behind. “You gonna be good and take all of me? I know you can do it.” You hummed as he started pushing forward.

“Yes, sir.”

He laughed aloud and continued to slowly sheath himself inside of you. He was going agonizingly slow, and though you knew you needed time to adjust, all you wanted was more.

“That’s right, baby. Take him like you take me,” Tooru said, running his hands over your waist. “I’m still better, though. Right?” Iwaizumi finally bottomed out inside of you and you let out a short, strangled sound, pressing your forehead against Tooru’s. “See? You’ve sent her right back into my arms.”

“We’ll see about that.” Iwaizumi pulled back slowly, dragging a shocked gasp from your throat. “You can’t fill her up like this. Right, sweetheart? Tell me how full you are.”

“So full,” you groaned. As his hips pushed forward again you mumbled, “please.” His laugh was even louder this time.

“Please what? Come on.”

“Please fuck me, Iwa.”

“I think that’s what I’m doing right now. You asking for more?” He moved his hips quickly once and you moaned.

“Yes,” you breathed.

“Yes what?”

“Yes, sir.” You leaned up and looked Tooru in the eye. “Yes, Hajime. Please fuck me harder.” His eyebrow raised and a smirk pulled at his lips.

“Oh, fuck.” Iwaizumi’s voice rumbled in his chest as he gripped your hips, snapping them against you hard and fast.

“Look at you, doll.” Tooru purred. “Taking his cock when I’m still inside of you. You that desperate? You want me to fuck you too?”

You nodded, face screwed up in a wince as Iwaizumi found a perfect angle inside of you.

“No sir for me? Greedy little thing. I guess you can have my cock. Next time you’ll have to beg.” He joined Iwaizumi in holding your hips, lifting them slightly off of him so he could gain leverage. Then he began slowly moving, cock dragging inside of you and, oh fuck, did it feel good to have both of them pushing inside of you. Tooru quickly build up his pace to match Iwaizumi’s, each of them thrusting into you at the same time. The feeling was overwhelming and quickly brought a sob to your lips.

“Aw, baby don’t cry. You were so ready for us. What happened?”

“Don’t be mean, Oikawa. She’s taking it well.”

“Sure, Iwa-chan, but she doesn’t seem very grateful, does she?” He grabbed your chin and brought your face up to look at him. “Say thank you.”

You choked on a moan as Tooru halted mid-thrust, pushing right up against where you wanted him most.

“Thank you,” you murmured. Tooru laughed.

“Come on, princess, Iwa-chan couldn’t hear you. Say it so he can hear it.”

“Thank you, Hajime.”

Iwaizumi let out a strained laugh but said nothing, too focused on the rock of his hips.

“Now me,” Tooru purred. There was a delicious glint in his eye. You couldn’t decide whether it was frightening or devastatingly sexy. “Say thank you, Tooru. Thank you for fucking you so well and letting my Iwa-chan have his way with you.”

“Thank you, Tooru,” you gasped. “For everything. Please.” You leaned forward and captured his lips. His eyes widened before settling into a smug expression.

“Fuck I’m gonna cum soon,” Iwaizumi said. Tooru broke your kiss.

“Not inside,” he warned. Iwaizumi scoffed.

Tooru seemed to realize that he was close as well, face screwing up and hips moving more erratically.

“Are you going to cum with us, princess? Make a mess all over our cocks?” You whimpered and buried your face into his neck. “I think that’s a yes, Iwa-chan. Just wait. She’s so pretty when she cums.”

“Tooru, please,” you begged, but you didn’t know what for. You were climbing fast, body giving in completely to the feeling of the two men inside of you. You felt so good and so full you almost couldn’t stand it.

“Be nice, Oikawa. Let her cum first.” Iwaizumi’s voice was strained.

“Won’t be too long, Iwa-chan. Just look at her.”

You were so close. You could almost taste the orgasm about to rack your body, more overwhelming than ever due to the second man buried inside of you.

“Please,” you begged, but you didn’t know who you were begging to. “Please, let me cum.”

“Let go, baby. We’ve got you,” Tooru said, staring past you at Iwaizumi. Your body locked up and you let out a small sobbing noise, tightening your grip on Tooru’s jersey. Your body shook and the men seemed to follow soon after you. Tooru mumbled a small flurry of “that’s it”s before holding your hips tight and spilling inside of you. Iwaizumi let out a long groan, continuing a slow slide in and out of you. Despite Tooru’s warning, Iwaizumi’s hips remained flush against your ass as he groaned through his orgasm, making you feel lightheaded but forcing a scowl onto Tooru’s face.

You all lay there panting for a moment, unsure of how and when to move. Your entire body was buzzing. The slightest movement forced a gasp, and a long hiss left your lips as Iwaizumi withdrew.

“Iwa-chan, what did I tell you?” Tooru said, but there was no fight in his voice. He sounded exhausted. Iwaizumi didn’t respond. He tucked himself back into his pants and leaned down, pressing a kiss to the top of your head and rubbing your arm. He stared at you for a moment longer before smirking.

“Make sure you stretch before you leave, Oikawa. You missed the cool down at the end of the game.”

Then he turned on his heels and left the locker room, leaving you and Oikawa alone with the echoes of what you had just done.

———————————————————————

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[strangelysamantha]

cheerleader ❀

rafe cameron x plus!reader.

warnings: swearing, flirting, slight angst in the beginning (barely)

words: 2,365.

summary: rafe was intrigued by you, he wanted to get to know you. he thought that task would be easy, but your distaste for him was apparent. despite the overwhelming amount of setbacks, he knew he would get you to crack.

request? no :)

a/n: please like and comment if you enjoy! thank you, ilysm <3

my masterlist

part two

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most things rafe wanted, he easily got. it was a known fact. his parents were financially stable so they could afford to throw money down the drain for useless items that wouldn’t be used more than once. his popularity and name allowed him to get away with most things. except you. you seemed to not care about his wealth or his looks. you didn’t even care to give him the time of day. he took this as a challenge. he was destined to get you to like him if it was the last thing he did.

the first time he talked to you was during school. he thought his charm and popularity would make you swoon. instead, it was quite the opposite. he approached you at your locker, his smile bright. “hey. i’m rafe.” he extended his hand out to you. “hello, rafe.” you shake his hand back, before retreating your hand to your side. you stare at him in confusion. “uhm am i in the way of your locker?” you question, he shakes his head. “oh no, actually. i just wanted to introduce myself to you.” you nod your head. “well rafe, it was nice to meet you, i guess. but i’m running late for class.” you shut your locker, speeding off to class.

rafe stayed by your locker in awe. you really thought rafe was just waiting to get to his locker? it’s halfway through the school year, if his locker was by yours, you would have known by now. he embarrassingly walked away, heading to his first class. that awkward moment was lingering in his head, stuck on replay. your facial expression that showcased confusion stayed still in his mind. by third hour he was over it, not as embarrassed. he shrugged it off, excited to try again.

rafe actually didn’t know that much about you. he saw you in the halls occasionally. his interest in you peaked when he saw that you talked to topper a lot. since you were heavily associated with topper, he believed that it would be easy to befriend you. it’s clear to him now that isn’t the case. he can’t help but feel surprised at your lack of knowledge for him. everyone knows of rafe, and you should especially know because of how well you know topper.

regardless, rafe knew what he had to do. he needed to see topper, and investigate him. rafe pulled his phone out, texting topper to meet him.

topper met rafe in the boy’s bathroom before fourth period. they scoped the bathroom, ensuring to themselves that they could openly talk since they were alone. rafe didn’t hesitate, he immediately bombarded topper with questions about you. “what’s with the sudden interest?” topper asks, confused.

“i don’t know, i keep seeing her in the hallway and she stares at me.” topper nods, “well she does good academically, i know her because her family is friends with my family, she’s on the cheerleading team, i don’t know man. what info are you wanting?” the cheerleading team. rafe smiled to himself, you are a cheerleader. “that’s good enough, i just needed some info so i could know if i want to meet her or not.” topper laughed, “alright man. i gotta go.” rafe nodded, “see you later.” topper fist bumped rafe before walking out the bathroom.

you were a cheerleader? he had no clue. it dawned on him, if he had no idea of who you were, why would you know who he was? he shook his head at the thought, instead heading to class.

on the other side of the school sat you, fidgeting with your pencil as you struggled to keep up with the current notes. the interaction you had with rafe was confusing you. why did he suddenly want to meet you? it didn’t make sense. the whole class period you tried to wrap your brain around his actions, trying to figure out what his intention was, but you fell short.

at lunch time you sat at a table, you usually sat with friends but they were absent. it didn’t help they were absent the one day someone popular randomly takes an interest in you. you sit on the chair, pulling out your math homework. if you knocked it out at lunch, you had a high chance of not having homework. you start the first problem, but immediately halt when your family friend, topper, taps on your shoulder. “hi tops.” you smile softly at him, setting your pencil down and turning your attention to him. he smiles at you, “hey.”

you pick up a goldfish, plopping it into your mouth. “how have you been?” you question topper. he shrugs, “same old same old. family is still upset with me, per usual.” you nod, soaking up what he said. “dang, that sucks. it’s so annoying how people hold grudges. they don’t know how to forgive and forget.” you shrug, smiling up at him. he returns the smile, “i know right.” you place your homework back in your bag, assuming you wouldn’t be able to finish it during lunch.

“what did you even do?” you ask him. he smiles, “uh i accidentally pissed a pogue off so they got revenge by sinking my new boat.” your eyes widened, “what! holy shit you must have fucked up bad.” he frowns, “i didn’t really want to do it, you know how tricky it is with our reputation and who we have to associate with.” you laugh, “oh i know all too well of what that’s like.” topper rolls his eyes, assuming you’re talking about him.

“hey! i’m not too bad.” you laugh, “it wasn’t about you. you aren’t bad at all.” you look up, seeing rafe take his backpack off. you glance at topper to see he is confused as well. “hey rafe, what’s up?” topper questions rafe, who had just sat down at our table. “nothing much man, saw you over here and decided to join.” you laugh sarcastically, “inviting yourself to our private party?” you question, slightly joking. rafe felt an unexpected twinge of jealousy when you grouped yourself and topper together.

“i’m just kidding rafe… kind of.” you grin, topper joining in by chuckling with you. rafe awkwardly laughs along. he pulls himself together, thinking of things to say. “are you going to the football game tomorrow?” rafe waits for your response. you smile slightly, “yeah, but i’m a cheerleader so i’ll be on field.” he nods, “oh, that’s cool.” you nod awkwardly. “yeah.” he smiles subconsciously, excited to see you in a uniform. his smile disintegrates when topper confronts him. “what are you smiling for bro?” rafe stared at him, unamused. “nothing.” topper scoffs, “alright then.”

you steal looks between rafe and topper, still confused. you don’t ask any questions, you just continue eating your food. the bell rings, indicating that lunch is over. you gather up your trash, standing up. you notice rafes eyes lingering over your body. his eyes fixating between your thick thighs, and hips. you feel self conscious under his stare, so you quickly stand up and walk to the trash can. rafe follows after you, quick on his feet. he comes up to your side, much to your dismay.

“will i see you at the game tomorrow?” you turn your head to the side, “are you going to the game?” you return. he nods, “yeah.” you smile, “then you’ll probably see me.” he grins, “okay, cool.” he quickly turns around, leaving you by yourself. you were confused still, but hey, maybe having rafe as a friend would be good.

you got through the day quickly, heading immediately home. you work on homework, chores, and finally get ready for bed. before bed you prepare your uniform. you set it out, along with a jacket so you weren’t on full display at school. you wake up the next morning, putting on your uniform, along with a bow in your hair. you head to school, slightly nervous for your possible interaction with rafe.

when you arrive at school, you don’t see rafe. you only saw topper, who was eagerly heading in your direction. he smiled, standing still in front of you. “hey, good morning!” you smile, “hi tops.” the two of you talk for a bit, him walking you to class. “can i pick you up before the game?” topper asks. “sure, it has to be a little earlier than the fans. i have warm ups and stuff i have to do before the game.” he grins, “okay! just text me tonight when you want me to pick you up.” you put your hands in your jacket pocket. “okay, thanks topper!”

he walks away, and you walk into your first hour class. you go through your classes as usual, rafe not showing up. you couldn’t tell if you were disappointed or relieved, but either way it didn’t matter, you had a game you had to prepare for. you do your make up, and touch up your hair. you chug water, and began stretching. you text topper, saying he could pick you up now, if he still wanted to drive you. his response was quick and enthusiastic.

topper pulls up to your house, his music loud, and a large smile plastered on his face. “game day!!” you laugh along, repeating his words. “game day!” you open his door, hopping inside. “let’s go!” you playfully roll your eyes at his eagerness, “to the school!” topper smirks, stepping on the gas, and speeding out your driveway.

the two of you sing along to the songs on the radio, before it abruptly ends due to you two arriving at the school. he decides to stay in his car, planning on joining right when the official game starts. you skip down the field, joining your teammates. you stretch with them, before you practice the chants and dance numbers.

at six thirty, they start allowing people in. you immediately see topper hunched over the fence, him waving frantically at you. you wave back, jogging over to him. “you ready?” he asks, you bite your lip, “i guess.” he laughs at your nerves, excited for you. you glance over and see rafe. he hadn’t seen you yet. your breath gets caught in your throat, slightly scared and self conscious to see him.

topper gives you reassuring words, and out of the corner of your eye, you notice rafe had found you. rafe slowly makes his way towards topper, keeping his cool. rafe stares at you in your cheerleading uniform. his breath gets heavy, he stares, watching you talk to topper. jealously fills his chest, of course topper was here first. rafe quickly approached the two of you, eager to break the conversation up.

“hi rafe.” you smile softly, looking up at him. he smiles, “hey. good luck today.” you fiddle with your fingers, “thank you.” rafe stays silent. you hear the coaches whistle. “i got to go, i’ll talk to you when i can!” you quickly turn around, jogging back to the cheerleading circle.

rafe watches as you jog away, hes mesmerized by how well the uniform fit. he knew you would look good, but damn. he looks over at topper, who makes eye contact with him. “what’s up rafe?” topper stares at rafe, waiting for an explanation. “she is so hot.” topper scoffs, “bro, already whipped?” rafe rolls his eyes, but grins. “for her, yeah. i’d willingly be whipped.” the two boys sit on the bench, topper watching the game, and rafe watching you.

after sitting in silence, rafe speaks up. “do you think she likes me?” topper quickly glances at rafe, trying to see if he was joking or if he was serious. when topper saw he was serious, he genuinely contemplated it. “id say maybe, i mean she doesn’t shrivel up in disgust when you are around. that’s a pretty good sign.” rafe shook his head, “that’s true. that is a good sign.”

rafe admired you, you getting his full attention. on break you rush to the fence, excited to see rafe and topper. “hey!” you look up at them, “you are doing great!” topper reached down, highfiving you. “thanks!” you look over at rafe, something took you over because he actually looked hot. you bit you lip slightly, you were going to say something, but rafe beat you to it. “you look good.” rafe smirked slightly, causing heat to rise to your face. “thank you, rafe.”

you return to the group again, your heart racing. the idea of rafe made your breath heavy. you continue to chant, and preform. you occasionally looked up rafe, his eyes always focused on you. you had a low chance of being able to go to the fence again, so you focused entirely on perfecting the choreography. the crowd was cheering loudly, your hometown winning the game.

at the final quarter, your hometown won by one point. your team jumps up and down, ecstatic. you preform a final show, before you break apart. you chug water. you rush in line with the other cheerleaders, going in a straight line to high-five the football players. you smile brightly at them, telling them congrats for winning the game. most of them returned a smile, and thanked you.

after the bleachers started to empty, you decided to meet up with topper, and possibly rafe. you look around for topper but he was gone. you turn around, accidentally bumping into rafe. “oh i’m sorry.” he stares at you, “hey, by the way topper left, said he was going on a date with a girl from the cheer team.” you frown, “oh. he was my ride.” rafe smiles, “you can ride me- i mean ride with me.” you laugh lightly at his switch up, “okay. i’ll ride you.” your heart is racing, the after game adrenaline flowing through your veins, which was causing you to be bold. he smirks at you, “okay, i’d enjoy that.” you mimic his smirk, following him to his car.

he turns around, “are you sure?” you nod, “i’m sure, are you?” he is shocked by your question, “so fucking sure.”

part two will be steamy <3

[gojology]

— Gojo and Nanami | Their Insecurities

pairing : insecure gojo x gender neutral reader, insecure nanami x gender neutral reader warnings : unedited, probably some misspellings, maybe some cursing, i probably dont make sense at all wordcount : 1703 a/n : this is so bad dear god please forgive me for deeming this as content

GOJO SATORU ‧₊˚✩彡.

☆ Gojo’s insecure about his lack of bodyhair. His lack of facial hair and arm hair worries him. Being babyfaced wasn’t something positive in his eyes- no, he wishes he was physically more masculine.

   Your eyes meet his, the sun rays bathing both of you in an orange filtered light. His mouth is slightly opened, skin flush to the touch. After a night of intimacy, your ready for another round, pushing your palm towards his forehead. “Good morning, Satoru.” you say, voice slightly wavering even in the most private presence, without the formalities and what not, he’s surprisingly normal, and it’s taken you a bit to adjust to that. He’s warm, but it’s the good kind of warm, and it shows on his silly, dopey smile.

    You guess it wasn’t the time for more sex, so you resist your urges, directing the energy to something else.

    Gradually, your palms find themselves on his cheeks, and you pinch them slightly, giving him a look you hope is loving- because you really do mean it. Your rest assured, as the curve to his swollen lips grew even wider. The sounds of bird chirped as your fingers danced across his jawline, finally at your final stop, his chin. 

    You tip his chin up, and sure enough, hickeys are adorning his neck. A feeling of joy and honor fills you for a brief second, you were the one that was allowed to see him vulnerable, given the pass into his locked up heart. He finally breaks the silence between the two of you, pushing away your slack hand delicately. 

    It’s peculiar, there’s a tremble to his lips, like he’s scared, or about to burst into a fit of tears. You think it should be the other way around, but here you were, arms held close to your chest, looking at him with a mixture of curiosity and anticipation, bated breath preventing you from questioning the sudden change in tone. 

    “Hey, um, Y/N, weird ass question, but, am I hairy? Like, wooly mammoth hairy?” 

    You can’t tell if it’s sarcasm or not.

    Trying not to make a face, you shrug your shoulders. “Well, I mean, not really. You’re actually pretty nonhairy, in terms of uh... The average-” you pause, realizing how drastically his face fell. “-But I do like non-hairy guys! Who would wanna date a wooly mammoth anyways? Hey, baby..” you coo, giving him a tiny peck on the cheek, fluttering your eyelashes.     “What’s this about? Hey, you know, you can just be straightforward with me, I don’t mind.” 

    He doesn’t take a moment of hesitation, exasperatedly blurting out, “Does my lack of.. Hair, bother you?” but it seems he regrets it, your cheeks puffing up, stifling a giggle. Yet, he maintains the bone-chilling eye contact, his eyes are as vivid as ever, so blue it looked like the entrance to heaven. Your immediately lulled, whatever he was going to say was definitely urgent.

    “W-What? Are you being serious?” covering your mouth, your voice is muffled, but his face looks absolutely terrified, and you relish in how funny he looked. It wasn’t everyday that he was genuinely frightened, well, maybe he didn’t show it often.    “Of course not! Why would I be even remotely worried about bodyhair when I have something way more eye-catching in front of me?”

    The shock turns into a sheepish smile, returning for a second time, your heart melting instantly. He takes a long, deep breath, exhaling the tension away, tugging at the covers to go over his chest. You hadn’t realized that he had stolen more than half of the blanket for himself, but you don’t make a fuss about it. 

    For all the weight he carried on his sagging shoulders, you’re sure the warmth is appreciated. 

NANAMI KENTO ‧₊˚✩彡.

☆ Nanami thinks he’s a boring person, through and through. Outside of work, he doesn’t see why anyone would want him. Some days, he wonders if he should pick up on Gojo’s personality, telling jokes and being sarcastic and what not.

   The fine, white porcelain Nanami had gifted you was beautiful, to say the least. Nanami frequently shone it until it glimmered in the light, wiping any smudge or speck of dirt that dared to get on his beloved tea set that he gifted to you a few months prior. Gold trim, alongside depictions of birds fluttering about, and your favorite flowers. It’s perfect for you, and that’s why he had gotten it. His eyes had instantly brightened, picturing your beaming face as you served the two of you some tea.

   But he wonders, would you be happier if he perhaps gifted you something more up to date in comparison to the porcelain? He had enough money to buy you the world, bags, jewelry, he’d often used to hear stories of his co-workers giving their wives expensive, well, anything, and they’d be over the moon. A sudden realization grew inside of him at the thought of this:    

   Was he too out-of-date?    

   The thought went rampant in his usually collected mind, twisting and turning at night, only the sound of you, deep in sleep, could calm the troubled man down. As a consequence to his overthinking, he got little to no rest, and if he got little to no rest, his eyebags would turn their ugly, sneering faces in his direction.

     And so, as he’s baking tea cakes to go along with the afternoon tea the two of you would routinely drink, he’s going deep into depth of himself. He’s a good worker, good at...

     What was he good at? Aside from work, he can’t see why he’d be of use. Nanami acknowledges he’s stoic, which may be good in some cases, but often, everyone runs away from him because he appears as scary with those cold, calculating eyes. As opposed to Gojo, everyone enjoyed how lenient of a teacher he was. Well, Nanami isn’t sure on that, maybe aside from Megumi, Nobara, and Yuuji, everyone hated that. Regardless, him and Gojo don’t share something in common.

     Gojo has humor, and he doesn’t. 

     So why did you like him? 

     Nanami’s subconsciously drumming his long, bony fingers against the counter, eyes studying the ceiling like it’s the last thing he’ll ever do. Steadily, an acrid smell completely overwhelmed your senses- now, you’re hacking into your arm, and finally, Nanami comes back to Earth. 

     He blinks a few times, like he’s drinking in his surroundings, before he realizes the tea cakes are completely burning into a crisp.

Now, he’s on heightened alert, yanking open the handle to the oven and fanning out the flames with a random oven mitt he had hastily grabbed for. Beads of sweat are developing on his skin, before finally, you rush in, still hacking up a storm with a large pot of freezing water in your shaking hands.

     Nanami curses himself for ever appearing as informal, but then he remembers he’s infront of his significant other, he didn’t have to put on an act. His face relaxes, and he opens his mouth to speak, to apologize, but he’s paused- by you. You raise your palm up at him, the other hand opening up a window looking over the garden.

      “Nana.” he freezes completely, the affectionate nickname was specially reserved for confrontations like this. You spoke softly, which, for some reason, was significantly worse than you screaming into his ear. Your eyes follow suit, staring at his collar, loosening his tie. He winces, but Nanami’s not sure why he does. You had touched him millions of times, so why was it now that he didn’t accept it?

     “Yes, my love?” he finally breathes out, wrapping a strong, gentle arm around your waist just loosely. You place your thumb just below his lower lip, your index finger rubbing his plush lips all at the same time. The exchange is purely affectionate, yet, he’s still tense. 

    “What has gotten into you?” you murmur. 

    “I- Nothing, darling, I’ll bake another-” 

    “No.” is all you say before you grab him by the chin, unwavering. Usually, those piercing eyes of his are emotionless, something shocking. The eyes are the gateway to the soul, so why is it that it’s blocked off? But you guess it wasn’t the case here, he stared back with the same level of intensity, fear and peculiarity. You stay in that position for a little, savoring just how much you must mean to him, it wasn’t everyday he was vulnerable and let you inside.      Your breathing is heavy, eyelids heavy as well due to his routinely ruckus every night, but you’re determined to erase any trace there was left of that.       You kiss him. It’s sloppy, yet chaste. A fight for dominance usually occurs between the two of you, and almost routinely, Nanami wins, but this time, he lets you do the work. 

   Your lips never once trail away from his own. Heavy breathing through nostrils, hands roaming where it shouldn’t at such an early time, but who gave a fuck about the rules? It wasn’t a workplace, and you’d never let it be one. He clings onto your figure, you savor his muscular physique. Not once do his hands not roam, your flesh was his, and his was yours. 

    Finally, you pull away, heat rising to your cheeks, tears are beginning to dawn on your glassy eyes. “I’ve listened to you roll around in bed every night, mumbling shit about how you don’t see why I’d want you. You better donate your eyes and brain to charity right now.” 

   This wasn’t the reaction, or beatdown he was expecting. He flinches at the vivid image he got of you gouging out his eyeballs. “...Why must I do that? 

   “Because, you don’t use them, obviously. If you took a fucking second of your life to look deeper into your personality below the surface level, you’d see how fucking amazing you are and I love you for that.” 

   Shaking your head furiously, you shush him up yet again when he finally decides to speak up, tears are beginning to spill down your cheeks. “Shut up, Nana. Shut. Up.” pulling him in for another kiss, your hands grabbing at his shoulder like he was going to let go. 

   But he never did. 

[moonlit-jeno]

Anonymous said: 58 + rough lucas pls 🥺

requests are closed!

warnings: explicit sex, choking

word count: 2.4k

Xiaojun’s room has always been your favorite. It’s clean, smells good, and best of all, has the biggest bed. Not to mention the softest blankets. It’s really a shame that you’re about to ruin them, but you figure it’s fine. He owes you for all the homework you did for him your first year here. Plus, you’ll buy him some laundry detergent as consolation.

The golden trophy in your hand glimmers under the LED lights illuminating the room, and the corners of your mouth twitch up. It’s your name engraved on the trophy, rightfully naming you the best team captain. Seeing it makes pride fill your veins, happiness filling you at the physical evidence of all of your hard work paying off. Only one other person deserves this award as much as you- not that you’d tell him that. You wonder what he’s doing at this moment. If he’s enjoying the party downstairs with his friends, or if he’s sulking in the backyard.

Xiaojun’s door bursts open. “You know damn well that I deserve that award.” Lucas growls, kicking the door shut behind him. Speak of the devil, and he shall appear. “You only got it because they knew that you would bitch and complain about losing for the rest of eternity.”

Lucas, the fun, easygoing party guy that gets along with everyone, constantly leading his team to victory whether it’s in a game, practice, or even class. Well, everyone except for you. Not that it’s entirely his fault; you do tend to make it your mission to annoy the living shit out of him every chance you get. Is it fun? Absolutely. You pout at him mockingly, jumping to your feet and moving towards him until there’s barely any space between you. “Really? So you’re telling me that I don’t deserve the award?”

“Yeah, actually. That’s exactly what I’m saying. I’m surprised that got through your dense fucking skull.” This is definitely the most agitated you’ve ever seen him. It’s exciting. “I’m not here for small talk,” Lucas says, head tilted to the side so he can look you up and down, bite his lip. “I’m here to fuck your brains out.”

There’s no opportunity for you to respond, for you to even make a noise as he crushed your mouths together. Your moan gets lost in his lips as he drinks you in greedily, one of his hands sliding up to cup your jaw and angle you to his liking. He spins you around and pins you to the wall, his free hand resting above you.

“Fuck, Lucas,” His kisses have you feeling drunk in the best possible way and you let your head tilt back to rest against the wall behind you, incapable of doing anything besides tangling your fingers in his hair and moaning at the feel of his lips against your skin. “God, you’re so...” You trail off as he nips at your throat, soothing the skin with his tongue. The hand on your ass slides to your hip, grip tightening as you sag into his touch.

“So what? Amazing?” Lucas finishes for you, grinning up at you when you groan. “Handsome? Godlike? I know.”

“Annoying.” You deadpan, using your grip on his hair to pull his lips back to yours. The laugh he lets out is smooth and vibrates against you, cutting off into a low growl when you bite at his lower lip, suck his tongue into your mouth. In turn, he slides his hand up to your throat, petting his thumb over the soft skin above your jugular.

He breaks the kiss and you whimper before you can stop yourself, inadvertently chasing his lips. The smile that lights up his features at your actions does nothing to break you out of your haze and you watch him through half lidded eyes, captivated by him. “Baby,” He whispers, hand now sliding up so that he can brush his thumb against your lower lip. “Shouldn’t you be nicer to me?”

“I don’t know.” The brain fog you have from just looking at him makes it hard for you to think of any of your normal responses, and you fight to think of something to say. “Shouldn’t you be fucking me?”

“I don’t know.” Lucas repeats, dark eyes never once leaving yours. “Can you handle it?”

You push against him, your need to have the upper hand winning the battle in your mind to just submit and let him have his way. Lucas, intrigued, lets you switch positions so that it’s him pushed up against the wall. “Handle what? Disappointment?”

“Oh, baby.” Lucas murmurs, hands moving down your body so that he can squeeze at your waist, down to your hips. “The only thing to be disappointed in is yourself for not sleeping with me earlier.” He lifts you with ease, throwing you over his shoulder as he pushes off of the wall. An indignant squeak leaves you at the ease he lifts you with and he shushes you with a smack to the ass. “But fine. You wanna be a brat? You’re gonna get fucked like one.”

Gentle giant is often used to describe Lucas. You wouldn’t quite say that it’s accurate.

Not as he tosses you onto the bed like you’re nothing, crawling on top of you and kissing you deeply. Not as he commands the kiss so easily, taking everything that he wants and nothing less. And definitely not as his hand slides up under your dress, tugging at your panties so hard that they rip.

There’s no promises from him to buy you a new pair, or even an apology. Because this isn’t a gentle fuck. This is Lucas trying to prove a point to you. Or maybe it’s Lucas taking out all of his bottled up frustration and anger on you. Either way, it’s well deserved and if this is what being a nuisance gets you, you might just have to annoy him more often.

A cry leaves you when two of his fingers enter you, stretching you out deliciously enough that you have to break the kiss to suck in some oxygen. Your hands grasp desperately onto his shoulders, clinging to him like he’s your life line while he smirks, working his fingers into you knuckle-deep. “Feel good?”

“So good,” you arch against him in an attempt to feel him deeper, eyes rolling back when he brushes your g-spot at the same time that he starts rubbing your clit. “That’s so good, fuck. Why are your hands so nice?”

He laughs. “You like my hands?” His free hand moves to your throat when you nod. “Like them here?” You nod frantically.

“More.” You plead, grabbing his shoulders tighter and hoping he gets what you’re trying to say. He doesn’t disappoint.

The digits on your throat press a little tighter, gradually cutting off your oxygen supply. Your eyelids flutter and your mouth opens in a silent moan, all of the sensations running through you getting to be too much. The fuzziness in your brain is only amplified by your lack of air, the heat pooling in your belly burning red hot as Lucas plays your body like an instrument. And the way that he looks at you, like he wants to nothing more than destroy you...

Just as it’s getting to be too much, he releases the pressure on your neck. The sudden intake of oxygen, the feeling of his lips on your throat, his fingers speeding up inside of you- it’s all so overwhelming, feeling him around you like this. You’re helpless as you come, crying out his name and every other curse you can think of, gripping onto him as tightly as you can in an attempt to ground yourself from the immense pleasure running through you.

Lucas works you through your high, not stopping even when you shake with oversensitivity. He keeps going right until you gasp out his name, moan that you’re going to come again. You whine then, high in your throat, sounding desperate even to you. It makes Lucas smile. 

“Oh, baby.” He tsks, shakes his head. His large palm cups your cheek and his fingers prod at your lips, smile only growing when you take the digits into your mouth. “If you wanted to come again, you should’ve been a good girl.” “I am a good girl.” You sniff, finding the strength to glare at him. He laughs, rolling off of you to dig through the nightstand.

“You are? Then act like it.” He finds what he was looking for, the tearing of a condom filling the air, and turns back to you. “Hands and knees, baby. Show me how good you can be.”

The fabric of your dress is discarded while Lucas rolls the condom on and then you’re completely naked, feeling the softness of the blankets against you as you settle into his requested position. His hand comes down hard on your ass and you yelp, elbows nearly buckling. You manage to stay upright. “Come on baby, you can do better than that. Arch a little.” His hand is heavy on your lower back and he presses down until your body aches and you can’t physically bend anymore. “There we go.”

The head of his cock presses against your entrance, the teasing as he never pushes in enough to make you delirious with need. “Lucas, come on.” You groan, trying to fuck yourself back on him. “Put it in already.” “Where are your manners?” He scolds, sliding his cock through your folds, nudging your clit. You have pride, but not enough to torture yourself like this. It doesn’t take much to make you fold. “Fuck, Lucas, come on. Please fuck me.” When he doesn’t yield, you look back over your shoulder and pout. “Please? I need it so bad, I’ll do whatever you want.” “Whatever I want?” His smile is present in his voice and he laughs softly. “Oh baby, you’re going to regret that.” There’s no time to focus on his words because then he’s pushing into you, filling you up deliciously. He’s big, splitting you in half to the point where you can’t do anything but moan and wiggle around, trying desperately to accommodate his impressive size. Not that Lucas helps with that.

He doesn’t wait for you to adjust before he’s fucking into you, hips slamming against your ass and filling the room with the lewd sounds of skin on skin. Your arms shake with the difficulty of holding yourself up, giving out completely when his hand slides up between your shoulder blades and shoves you down to the mattress. 

“Fuck,” You sob out, jaw going slack at the pleasure threatening to drown you. Your hands grip at the sheets desperately, holding on for dear life as Lucas grips at your hips and uses that as leverage to fuck you even harder. The orgasm he’d built you towards earlier is racing towards you at full force and you clench around him, his name falling off of your tongue as a curse. “Don’t stop, don’t fucking stop. ‘M gonna come.” “Again?” His tone is mocking but he listens to you, fucking you at a constant speed, cock hitting deep inside of you. “Mhmm, you must’ve been really desperate for my cock if you’re coming this easily.”

It’s kind of true. You’ve always thought that Lucas was hot, especially when you riled him up, but this… This is something else entirely. This is something better than you ever could have imagined.

The intensity of your orgasm scares you and you mumble out curses that get lost in Lucas’s mouth when he turns your head to meet your mouth in a sloppy kiss that’s more tongue and teeth than anything. You kiss him back needily, only breaking the kiss when it gets to be too much. Your orgasm washes over you slowly, starting gently but building until it’s almost too much to handle, drowning you in it’s intensity. It leaves you feeling wiped out, your head spinning from the pleasure, body heavy with sleep. 

Lucas groans out your name as he comes, hips stuttering, teeth sinking into your shoulder to muffle his cries. The pain helps to ground you and you sigh out softly, hand moving behind you to stroke his hair. He languidly thrusts into you before pulling out, turning you over so that he can kiss you. 

This kiss is softer than the other ones, less rough and frantic and more caring, tender. He pulls away, thumb rubbing over your cheek bone, and smiles before pressing a kiss to your forehead. You feel cold without him on top of you and you grab a pillow to cuddle in his absence, watching as he shoots the condom at the trash can and misses. He laughs sheepishly and tosses it into the trash before leaping back into bed, wrapping himself around you. You snuggle into him gratefully, happy for the warmth. 

“We can’t stay in here for long.” You say, even as you have to force the words out through a yawn and can feel your eyelids drifting shut. “Xiaojun will kill us.” “I don’t think he’ll mind too much.” Lucas laughs, brushing some of your hair out of your face. “If he does, I’ll deal with it.” You laugh and shake your head.

“I can’t believe we’re cuddling. Fucking is one thing, but cuddling?”

Lucas pouts. “I mean, I can leave if you want.” He moves as if trying to get up and you whine in protest, snuggling even closer.

“No, I want you to stay.” Your face feels a little warm at the confession and you hope he can’t feel it. “You make a good pillow.” Lucas laughs in response, and it’s silent for a while until he speaks again. “You know y/n, you’re better than any award.” Lucas says, smiling softly. You’re about to call him cheesy or cringe at his sweetness, but he’s quick to follow up with an “I’ll still take the trophy, though.”

You try very hard not to tell him to shove the trophy up his ass.

[simpcxty]

You said you needed ideas so hear me out-

Sfw- trans! Reader (ftm) with Tsukishima who gives tough love and hates it when you have really bad dysphoria days. Snaps at anyone who misgenders you.

NSFW- oikawa would be such a tease when you get needy and shit. Like this fucker would tease you after you beg because he told you to beg.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!! You have given me brain fuel, and for that. I love you 🧡

I have never written something in one day. Thank you, you have truly inspired me 😩👏

TW for Tsukishima: deadnaming and misgendering, deadname is your choice, but Y/n will be for your new name and Y/d/n for your dead name because no dads are mentioned here. Gets a little angsty but they figure it out.

I didn’t want to be disrespectful to anyone and choose a name that might be someone’s new name or dead name.

Also I’m sorry if my writing isn’t accurate for a ftm character. I did my best and I really hope you like it!

I did my best with the tough love but it does get a bit fluffy tbh.

Kei Tsukishima

Kei always tries.

He really does. You guys had started dating before you came out, and the switch from your dead name to Y/n had him caught off guard.

So did the sudden shift of pronouns.

But he didn’t leave, so he was trying to do his best all right?

But he’s already bad with emotions, these are a different kind that he doesn’t even know how to approach.

So he gives it the same energy he does with everything else.

Today though.

Something was very odd about today.

His normal words had you flashing him your best fake smile and turning away from him.

And trust me, he could tell the difference.

But for now, he chose not to comment.

Will it be one of those days today?

You didn’t like to talk about your Dysphoria but Kei always picked up on it.

Or at least he tried to.

He even had a custom made chest binder coming in the mail that should be here any day now.

But when you leave the room after Kei’s not incorrect but painfully blunt statement went straight to your very soul.

He replays the conversation in his head to see where he messed up.

He found himself doing that a lot.

‘I get that you’re trying Kei. It just sucks that other people don’t even bother.’

‘I don’t really think it’s that big of a deal. They’re stupid people who don’t even matter at least I’m trying. Imagine if I wasn’t?’

It made you question everything.

Did he even want to be trying?

Why are you being a nuisance?

Why are you putting him through this. He’s got much more important things to be focusing on as a senior in college this year.

You’re finally being true to yourself and putting him through unnecessary stress aren’t you? What is wrong with you?

All of these thoughts and more swarmed your head as you leaned against the bathroom counter trying to catch your breathing.

Stop it. Stop being such a big crybaby.

Kei Tsukishima doesn’t need a crybaby.

Why does it have to hurt so damn bad to just be a girl? He’d like you so much more as a girl.

“Y/n..?” His voice sounds so tired.

Damn it Y/n. Get your fucking shit together.

“Please talk to me.. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to come out like that babe.. I just-“ his eyes almost seem dull when you open the door, only to brighten when you open the door and he gets a good view of you.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to say it like that, I just- I don’t, I don’t know how to handle this sometimes, but I don’t want you to think I don’t care. It’s just new, and I can get adjusted-“ he feels his heart clench a bit when your next words come out.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry I couldn’t just stay who I was, I’m sorry I couldn’t just be a girl for-“ and he’s grabbing your face with his palms as tears start to well up in his eyes.

“Shut up. Shut up, because I love you however I can have you. I love you. I just want you, please don’t get confused and think I have a preference because I just want you Y/n. I love you, no matter who you are. Please don’t forget that.” The tears streaming down your face slow as he kisses your head and wraps his arms around you.

“Im sorry Kei.” He kisses your head again.

“Shh, stop it. Stop apologizing. You have nothing to apologize for babe, we do need to finish getting ready for class though okay?” You nod and he smiles.

———

When you get to school, he can almost feel the anxiety wafting from you.

But he doesn’t hesitate to wrap his arm around you and pull you along with him.

“You have me, okay? I’m just as much yours as you are mine babe.” You nod and expect him to pull him arm away, and he does, only to entangle his hand in yours.

“Tsukishima!” No- because he recognizes that annoyingly high pitched voice, and he’s not in the mood for it. Nor will you be.

So he picks up speed. Keeping his hand tight around yours and pulling you in front of him, only to wrap his arms around you slightly and speed up even more.

“Kei what are you doing?” You think he’s going to ignore you until he speaks up finally.

“Don’t want to deal with her.”

“Y/d/n can you-“ he stops right in his tracks and turns around to acknowledge the blonde.

“Alisa is it? See how easy was that? I wasn’t even sure. You know for a fact that isn’t the proper name that he goes by. So correct yourself, or don’t talk to my boyfriend or me. Got it?” She goes to speak again but Tsukishima already has you two walking again and his ears are flushed.

“Tsuki-?” You’re blushing and he tightens his grip on your waist.

“It wasn’t right, I’ll correct anyone who gets it wrong. Even myself.” You smiled and he manages to crack a small one.

Kei Tsukishima always tries.

———————————————————————

NSFW CONTENT AHEAD

I didn’t know if you still wanted a ftm character so this one is just written female.

READ RESPONSIBLY PLEASE

Characters aged up 18+

“Beg.” You scoffed.

“I don’t beg.” Your hips are rising as he pressed his thumb harder against your clit and you whimper.

“I won’t do anything more until you beg.” You rolled your eyes and attempt to sit up. Only for him to wrap a hand around your throat and push you back down.

“Toru, I don’t beg-“ he tightens his grip around your throat and you whine.

“I said, beg.” The way he demands it in your ear has your thighs attempting to clam shut.

Key word, attempting.

“Are you gonna listen to a single thing I say princess? Or am I gonna have to leave you here like this?” You looked up at him desperately and his grip around your neck loosens a bit.

“Please, please just fuck me already. I need it Toru, it’s been too long please just do it already-“ you’re cut off with whines as his tip prods at your entrance, but the pressure on your clit is still hard and you know he’s waiting for more.

“Please! Please fuck me! I need you Toru please!” He chuckles and pushes in agonizingly slowly.

“Like you said babe, it’s been too long. I need to go easy on your pretty pussy.” You whine at that.

“Don’t want you to go easy- just fuck me rough please!” Tears of frustration pool in your eyes and he laughs.

“Awe, don’t cry princess, I’ll give you what you want. You begged so nicely.” The sudden snap of his hips has you unable to respond to his taunt.

Yeah so what you begged. You’re getting dicked down by this god of a man. I’d say that’s a win.

His hands were both on your hips now as he thrusted into as if his life depended on it.

“Missed you so much.” He whines and a particularly hard thrust has you reaching up to wrap your arms around his neck.

The new position has you sliding down on his dick so much easier, and the way he can just lift you up and down quickly has him whining more.

“M’gonna cum. Off.” He whimpers as you tighten and start to lift yourself off and grabs your hips. He’s never cum so fast but you don’t mind.

“T-Toru-!” He gasps as you tighten more and his hips thrust up desperately.

“Nevermind, I wanna cum inside. Please, please let me cum inside. You feel so good, just wanna cum inside your warm pussy hnngh~ please!” His hips are starting to falter and you know he’s getting closer as his hands tighten around your waist, lifting you up and down to meet with his sloppy thrusts.

“Please!” He’s begging and you almost laugh.

“Oh god please, just wanna cream inside you please!” He has to stop thrusting and you’d almost think he did cum.

But you knew better. His nails digging into your hips and his ragged breathing against your neck has you melting.

“Did you even really have to ask? Just cum babe.” Your words are so nonchalant that he’s whining and picking up his thrusts again.

“fuckfuckfuckohfuckyes” his voice is messy and it’s almost gibberish.

But as you tighten around him and his hips falter he’s moaning and whimpering into your chest and neck.

“So tight, ngHh shit~” he moans whorishly as you cum around him and cum spurts out of him and into you.

“You fuck me so good. So so good Y/n.” His hips are still sputtering and you’re wondering just how long it’s been since he’s actually gotten off.

“Thank you, Thank you so fucking much baby.” His cum is already spilling out of you and he’s still finishing.

This’ll be a fun cleanup.

He finally lays you down on the bed and lays his head in between the valley on your chest as he catches his breath.

“You begged.” He wraps his arms around you and pulls you closer, making you whimper while he stays inside of you.

“Do I need to remind you how you sounded when you wanted to cum Toru?” His head shoots up at that and his cheeks flush.

“But you’re so warm. So tight and comfy. I didn’t and still don’t want to leave.” He whines and wiggles his hips upward and you whimper. You can’t help but clench as he thrusts up again and whines again.

He keeps up the occasional thrusts. Neither of you have the energy for a second round. That much is obvious. But the bliss is overwhelming.

“Don’t want to pull out yet. Please don’t make me.” He whines and you just clench around him to tease.

“Fuck. Don’t do that. M’still hard and I’m ninety percent sure if you keep doing that I’m gonna stuff your already full pussy again.” You hummed and he wraps his arms around you.

“Empty threats. We’re both too tired, you know we’ll just go again when we wake up.”

“I’m gonna get you pregnant.” He says it confidently, you couldn’t even laugh at the statement. Because he probably and most definitely will.

“I mean if that’s what you want, I wouldn’t mind having a little Oikawa running around.” Almost all his stamina is back in that moment.

Congratulations you have unlocked

Breeding King with Toru Oikawa 🔓

Neither of you ended up sleeping that night.

[cthulhuliet]

Hi hi ~~ big fan of your Lawlight work * chef kiss * So, if it serves to inspire you I got this little idea! NSFW A huge hc of mine is that Light loves L reading for him with that hot British accent of his, like come on, L`s dubbed voice with a brit accent??*agressive chef kiss* SOO imagine Light resting his head on L`s lap while L is reading to him and things get lewd in the novel :D maybe things coul get lewd in reality too 👀👀 oh, and another hc of mine is that Light rides D like a pro so ... maybe something with both? if you'd like 👉👈 No pressure at all tho!

Thank you so much for your kind words :') I am a fan of your Lawlight work as well, and even though it took a two weeks or so (my bad) I really hope you enjoy! (it also, as always, turned out to be a lot longer than I meant it).

close your eyes and imagine it

3.1k words | AO3 Link | warnings: explicit content, general kink, you know the drill

Most of the dreams were incomprehensible nonsense, and L had just about given up on the month of April when he saw a long entry that made him pause. His eyes widened at the contents. “Huh.”

Light shifted a little bit to make himself more comfortable, eyes only half open, “Hmm? Find something interesting?”

“I am in this one. Did you frequently dream about me?”

There was a beat, and Light responded coolly, “I cannot remember specifics. Hence, the journal.”

L hummed, a small smirk Light could not see grew on his face, “Well then, I will read this one out loud for your benefit.

OR

The one where Light discovers a dream journal he had written during the Kira investigation and can't help but be embarrassed by L's role in his fantasies. L, of course, does not mind. -

“A dream journal?” L questioned. He closed his laptop and Light smirked, raising an eyebrow, holding the notebook in his hands. L crossed the room and took the journal from Light, “Where did you find this?”

Light shrugged, “On my bookshelf with a lot of my other textbooks and such.”

“How old is this?”

“Was in my late teens, I suspect.”

L flipped through the book idly, Light’s neat handwriting was pleasant and clean compared to L’s own scrawled and messy penmanship. The pages slightly stuck together, as the old notebook seemed to have not been touched in years. L stopped at a page and briefly read the contents and looked at the date, before his own eyes widened.

“Hang on, this is during-”

“The Kira investigation? Yeah.” Light’s slight smirk turned into a large cheshire. “I figured you might be interested in reading what I wrote.”

L bit his bottom lip, looking up at Light, one eyebrow raised, “Does the Death Note still give you nightmares to this day?”

Shrugging, Light came up to L and looked over his shoulder at the notebook, “I mean, sometimes? But I also believe that having nightmares is just a part of being a person.”

“Or you have become so numb to your own murderous tendencies the nightmares do not affect you that much anymore.” L muttered, just loud enough for Light to hear.

He did hear him, of course, and he retaliated by shoving L hard enough for him to fall backwards onto their bed. Light socked L on the arm when he flopped down onto his back as well as L went to read Light’s journal to himself.

“Leave me alone, Light, can’t you see I am busy?” L teased, which earned him another hit on his arm, “You are being bothersome.”

Light crossed his arms, now sitting next to L laying down on the bed, “Those are my dreams, you are not reading without me, obviously.”

“Well then lie down so I can read them to you.” Light was the most frustrating man that L had ever been with. He wouldn’t have him any other way.

L sat up and rested his back against the headboard. Light assumed his usual position and rested his head on L’s lap. L idly put his hands through Light soft brown locks, twirling his soft hair through his fingers.

This was not an unusual position to find the pair in. Light often requests that L read to him, the other man finding the restrained but smooth baritone of L’s voice to be incredibly attractive, but also incredibly calming to listen to. It is not the first time his voice has been complimented, and it certainly will not be the last. Sayu has told L multiple times that he should become a voice over actor. He politely declined. The rest of the people do not matter, really. The only praise he needs is when Light humbly hands him a book he reads before bed, and falls asleep to L’s voice quicker than any amount reading on his own.

“‘ April 1st, 2004: I was present for class at To-Oh university, however we were all forced to give a presentation about when we believe all of our classmates will die and why. This was a horribly dark and drab lecture hall, and I had forgotten my cue cards about why Sakurano Mari was going to die due to dementia .’  This is not exactly a fun read.”

“It was not exactly fun to think about either.”

“I am going to find a different one.”

L used one hand to run his fingers through Light’s hair and the other to flip through the journal, skimming through the contents. Most of the recounts were incomprehensible nonsense, though there is no judgement to be had there. Whenever L does sleep, most of his dreams are disconnected fragments of stories -- feelings and emotions rather than a complete narrative.

L had just about given up on the month of April when he saw a long entry that made him pause. His eyes widened at the contents.

“Huh.”

Light shifted a little bit to make himself more comfortable, eyes only half open, “Hmm? Find something interesting?”

“I am in this one.”

“Are you?”

“Did you frequently dream about me?”

There was a beat, and Light responded coolly, “I cannot remember specifics. Hence, the journal.”

L hummed, a small smirk Light could not see grew on his face, “Well then, I will read this one out loud for your benefit:

“‘ Damn that Ryuzaki. He is plaguing my thoughts not only during the day, but I cannot even escape the damn bastard in my dreams’, I love you too, dearest ,” L sardonically snided. Light pinched his thigh , “ ‘Last night's events were particularly egregious, as this is not the first time something like this has happened, but I feel mortified even writing this down. Though, maybe if I recount what happened (like with the nightmares) these dreams will go down in their numbers.

“‘Ryuzaki and myself were in the library studying next to one another. I was eating a biscotti with tea. As it was in my mouth, Ryuzaki came up and bit off the end of my biscotti and just chuckled at me. I wasn’t sure what to do or say, but I just know I felt really hot an -’”

“L…” Light gripped his thigh dangerously, “What are you doing.” It was phrased as a question, but Light said it as a command. He ignored him. Light was never the one to give out commands anyway.

“‘ I cannot remember much but the next moment Ryuzaki’s lips were on my neck. Everything was fuzzy, but I could feel him biting marks into me and was teasing me by grinding against my di- ’”

Light growled, “I’m taking this away from you. Now.” He moved to sit up, but L’s hand was still in his hair. L gripped his roots harshly and shoved him back down. Light whined at the action, swallowing hard.

“You are not going anywhere.” That was a command, and Light took it as such.

“This is mortifying…” Light muttered against the mattress, his speech breathy.

L hummed and pulled Light’s hair up, forcing him to look at him, “I disagree.” He lied. “You are going to be good and listen to me read this whole thing.”

Light laughed, cocky, though his eyes were glassy with flushed cheeks, “Oh yeah? Or what?”

“Or how about I get to come and you don’t, hmm?” Light opened his mouth and closed it again, face flushed with shame. L let go of his hair and Light buried his head in L’s lap. L smirked and chuckled, “You are so adorable, all blushy and embarrassed…” Light whined at that, running his fingernail down the inside of L’s thigh.

“‘ This is not the first time this has happened, though I have to admit, it was the best incident. Even hazy, I had never felt that sensitive and stimulated. I just wanted to stay like that forever.’” L had one hand on the book, the other held a distracted, but firm, grip in Light’s hair, who was presently biting his lip and running soft strokes over L’s cock. “‘It was even better when I got to put my mouth on Ryuzaki. I have never sucked a dick before, so my brain could only supply what it imagines it feels like, but it was not even that that made it so good. Ryuzaki would hold my hair tight and look down at me while I was on my knees. He kept telling me that I was a slut, but that I was doing such a good job for him. Even before this I thought Ryuzaki had such a nice voice, I wish I could hear him more…’ You think my voice is nice, huh?” L asked, keeping his voice level, as Light’s feather touches became firm palming.

He groaned again, “Tch, shut up.”

“No.” L pulled him by his hair, forcing Light to look him in the eye, “I think it is time you shut up.” In only a few seconds, L manhandled Light and dropped him to his knees on the floor at the edge of the bed. L sat at the end, grabbing the journal with one hand and undoing his jeans with the other. “How many times have you sucked dick since writing this? Hundreds?” Light finished the job of removing L’s pants and underwear, his cock standing erect in front of him, “C’mon cock-slut, show me what you got.”

Light eagerly took L in his mouth, expertly utilizing his tongue on his head. L closed his eyes and tried to not become overwhelmed by the sensation. He opened his eyes to see Light’s cocky doe-eyes staring back up at him.

“What was it that you dreamed of? My hand tight in your hair, fucking your mouth, telling you you’re being a good slut, right?” L asked, rhetorically as he returned his hand to harshly grip Light’s locks. He slowly moved Light’s head up and down, spit dribbled out of the corners of his mouth. Light’s face was blood red with humiliation and lust, it was perfect.

L bit his lip as Light took him all the way down his throat, refusing to be the one to break first. He picked up the journal again, eyes focusing and unfocusing on the work in front of him. “‘ Ryuzaki kept calling me good boy, telling me I was taking him so well, and never had anyone ever made him feel as good as I was. I felt so overwhelmed. I had never felt such extreme desire for anyone, but I think at that moment I would do anything for him.’ Do you still want to hear all that? Still want me to call you a good boy, and tell you you are taking me so well?”

Light groaned around L’s cock, the vibrations from his throat sent a shiver up his spine and L suppressed a needy whine on his end. After years of doing this, Light knows exactly how to push him to the very edge-- to give him so much and yet not enough.

“‘ My memory gets a little fuzzy here, but Ryuzaki laid down on the desk, and he grabbed me by the thighs so hard I think I would have had bruises in reality. I grabbed him by the throat and rode him on the desk. A part of me was worried, because the conference room in the library was all glass, but also my head was so hazy and it felt so good.’” L pressed a thumb against his lips, “Had Light fucked himself on toys at this point?”

He pulled off of L, slowly stroking him as he thought about it, “I think at that time I had. I only realized I was not straight shortly after high school, and my sexual drive moved pretty fast after that.”

“‘Shortly after high school’, shortly after meeting me, right?” L smirked. Light opened his mouth to attempt a retort, but just narrowed his eyes.

“Such an egomaniac you are,” Light scoffed, “Not everything is about you.”

“No, not everything. But this is.” L reached under their bed and pulled out a box of toys and lube. He casually tossed the bottle and a large blue dildo in front of Light, “Stretch yourself open with that. I want to see you.”

“You don’t want to do it yourself?”

“Like you have earned that privilege yet.” L leaned forward (careful to not fall off the edge) and grabbed Light by the chin, forcing him to look L in the eye, “You’re going to open yourself up on that cock, and when your slutty hole is ready for me, you can ride me like in your fantasies.”

He could almost see the blood rushing to Light’s ears-- being literally talked down to-- condescended and scolded like a child. And yet, his pupils were blown all the way out, L barely seeing the amber color of Light’s eyes, and his jeans and underwear were, of course, already halfway to his ankles.

Light took the tip of the toy and fucked his mouth in and out with it, eyes never leaving L’s. He was already 3 fingers deep inside of himself, lewdly moaning around the cock very intentionally.

“This is a good look for you,” L remarked, breathily, slowly stroking his own cock.

Light suctioned the dick to the hardwood, and hovered over it, teasing his hole with the tip, “Well, if you are going to keep calling me a slut- fuck… I might as well lean into it.” Light bottomed out on the toy, one hand running through his hair, another sucking on two fingers as he slowly moved. Light, flushed and fucked out and using himself, was the pinnacle of sex and desire-- L began to question his decision about who exactly this was a punishment for.

“Ngh, this cock is so big , L… But it doesn’t feel nearly as good as yours.” Light dragged his teeth across the bottom of his lip, pointed looking at L’s cock, now leaking precum. Light knew he was getting to L. He knew exactly how he looked and exactly what L was thinking.

Fucker. Two can play at that.

L slowed down his own movements, raising an eyebrow at Light, “A common whore like yourself would be satisfied with any cock inside of him. You want mine so bad? Close your eyes, think…” L held the book open with one hand, “‘ I feel like I am going crazy. I am supposed to want this stupid bastard dead. And yet all I want right now are my hands on him and his on mine-’” Light groaned, finally touching his neglected aching cock, “‘-and it is so hard to focus on bringing him down, when the entire time I am dreaming about Ryuzaki’s voice in my ear, and my hands around his throat, and his tongue and mouth on me everywhere . I may just have to take care of him so I stop feeling this way... ’ My my, Kira... ” Light groaned at the name, “I thought you would be a bit more careful than to let your inner thoughts so out in the open like this. What would have happened if someone had gotten a hold of this?”

“I- Fuck- Academic rivalries are not uncommon....”

“I wanted to sentence you to death and you still could not stop thinking about me inside of you-”

“Oh shit L…”

“-or my hands on your cock or my fingers stretching you wide open. You still want me to whisper in your ear and moan , telling you what a good boy you are, right?”

“Yes… yes I want that L…”

L tutted, “And yet you aren’t a good boy. Desperate and begging… Writing down naughty thoughts and fantasies about someone who you wanted to die?” L shook his head, casually tossing the book aside. He reached for his own cock again, slowly stroking it watching Light fall apart, giving himself dual sensations, “Kira needs to make up his mind about what he wants. Because I don’t think he is good at all.”

“ L please…”

“Please, what?”

“Please let me on your cock.”

“Why would I allow that?”

Light stopped his movements on the dildo, only slowly stroking his cock at the same speed as L was his own, “I am not a good boy, I am a cock-slut for you, and only ever you. Fuck me please,” Light begged, broken and desperate.

L stood up and grabbed Light’s hands, pulling him off of the toy. He brushed the hair out of Light’s eyes and pulled Light on top of him, “So good, Kira. You don’t have to be a good boy for me, you can just be my good slut.”

He kissed L, hard, biting his bottom lip as he lined himself up on L’s dick and sunk down on him.

“ Fuck, you feel so much better than that cheap plastic,” Light straddled L properly, pressing his hands against L’s chest as he rode him, not wasting anytime picking up speed.

“Such a good whore for me, Kira,” L said, kissing his wrist, “You really do ride cock like you get paid to do it.”

“I know,” Light said, breathy and fucked.

L huffed, “A bit cocky, aren-”

“Now it’s your turn to shut up,” Light said, pressing down on L’s pressure points, his fingertips pushing hard enough into his throat it will surely leave marks against his pale skin.

L’s eyes rolled in the back of his head and Light moved his hips faster, L snapping back up to meet his thrusts, which quickly became sloppy as black dots began dancing in the corners of his eyes and his lungs started burning. His eyes welled up with tears and his entire body was on fire, his limbs going limp. He felt the white, hot edge so close and tangible. Every thrust felt like a rattle of electricity hitting every nerve and every part of his consciousness so closely and he just needed more -- Light relented, moving his hands away from his throat. L eyes snapped open wide and he coughed, taking heavy breaths. Tears fell from the corners of his eyes, and he dug his fingertips into Light’s waist, harshly grabbing him by the hips.

“L? I’m sorry, you told me you would tap out if-”

“Kira, more-- again-- now.” L commanded, and Light did not hesitate. He grabbed him by the throat and put his fingers in L’s mouth for good measure. Light was riding him with expert pace and precision, his lower body strength and years of running paying off. L’s legs trembled, and he used the last bit of his unfucked mind to dig his nails into Light’s hips and rock him faster and faster on his cock, reaching that beautiful and terrible and intense edge.

“ Ah- L! ” Light comes only a few seconds before L himself, moaning around Light’s fingers as he loosened his grip, but still only letting a fraction of the air healthy for the human brain into his head.

Light did not move himself off of L immediately. He moved his hand away from his throat, but kept small pressure on his neck with one of his thumbs.

“What are you doing?” L muttered. Light said nothing. L opened his eyes, tapping him. “Light?”

Light blinked, looking back, “Sorry, was feeling your pulse.”

“Why?”

“Wanted to make sure I didn’t kill you.”

L smiled softly, “Don’t want me dead anymore?”

“Sometimes. Certainly not like this, it’s too personal.”

“What, killing me while my cock is in your ass is too close for comfort?”

“Something like.” Light smirked and pressed a soft kiss against L’s lips.

After cleaning up, Light told L he wanted to burn the dream journal to prevent further embarrassment.

“Over my dead body.” L said, holding the notebook just out of reach.

Light smirked, “I have no problem arranging that.”

[thirstyforlulu]

Alucard x Succubus Reader

The next mission was an unusual one, that Hellsing rarely saw due to its nature. Vampires were their clear specialty, but in this case, due to the proximity to the manor, the “creature” causing the problem was being sent their way for containment purposes.

Integra, Seras, Walter, Alucard, and a few soldiers greeted the armored vehicle in front of the entrance when it arrived late at night. The driver got out and walked up to Integra.

“Sir Integra,” He greeted.

“We are ready to receive the creature when you are,” Integra replied.

The driver nodded, walking over and tapping on the side of the truck. From the back door, a collection of men dressed in combat gear hopped out, holding their guns pointed towards the inside of the truck. With them in place, another set of men carried a cage holding a sleeping person out from within the truck and down the stairs.

As the men and the cage approached, the Hellsing soldiers trained their guns on the person as well, watching for any sign of movement. The men holding the cage stopped, and Integra gestured for her men to replace them, which they did so hurriedly. It was a tense moment as the cage changed hands. Everyone held their breath, waiting for the creature to take its chance, but it never did, allowing the cage to be transferred with no trouble.

“We leave it in your care,” The driver said with a bow before getting back in the vehicle.

Like well-trained soldiers, the armored men stood up straight and saluted before hopping back into the vehicle. It drove off, leaving Hellsing to its new task.

The entire crew followed as the soldiers took the cage inside and carried it to one of the rooms in the basement, where they planned to keep it for the time being. After setting the cage down, Integra waved all the soldiers off, leaving her, Seras, Alucard, and Walter alone with their new captive for the first time.

“Get up,” Integra commanded, loud enough that it woke the creature.

It sat up, revealing a very human-looking form. It had s/c skin and h/c hair, and when it opened its eyes, it revealed they were e/c. Cute little horns poked out from atop its head, and a thin tail with a heart-shaped point slithered around behind it. Through sleepy, half-lidded eyes, it surveyed its new captors, pausing when it reached Alucard.

“Tell me what you were doing inside that monastery,” Integra demanded.

The entire group looked down on the creature with malice. Although, Alucard hid a tint of amusement behind his red lenses.

“I was feeding, of course,” You explained, stretching your arms.

“Feeding? On what?”

There were no puncture wounds found on the bodies of the deceased monks, nor were their bodies drained of blood. They were all found dead in their beds, clothes disheveled, faces twisted in pure fear.

“Why, I ate their very souls, my dear,” You teased, flicking your tail playfully.

“How?”

You sat up in the cage, facing her directly now. A sick grin played on your face.

“I am a succubus. Certainly, I don’t have to remind you of what we do.”

The answer came as no surprise to them. Succubus was in fact on their list of possible culprits, but they weren’t sure how to deal with the situation. Vampires are easy, they’ve dealt with countless of them, but how would they deal with you?

“The cage you sit in was built with blessed metal, it should hold you until we figure out what to do with you. For now, you will stay here as our prisoner. Should you escape, we will not hesitate to send you back to hell where you belong,” Integra threatened.

“So cruel,” You began, turning to Alucard. “Please tell me he’ll be the one keeping an eye on me~”

“You will be left alone in this room, with operatives stationed outside where you can’t seduce them.”

With that, Integra left the room, with the others right behind her. Leaving you all alone in your new prison. Not that it mattered, you had plans of your own.

Hours later, in the dead of night, you got to work escaping. You figured everything had calmed down at this point, so the only ones keeping an eye on you were the ones stationed outside. As long as you took them out silently, you wouldn’t set off any sort of alarm, letting you slip out unnoticed.

The blessed bars hurt to touch, but they did little more than sting. After squeezing yourself through a gap, thank you demonic powers, you landed on the other side with no visual signs of injury. As quietly as you could, you walked over to the door and phased your head through. You were close to the bottom, so they wouldn’t notice you right away, but oddly enough you found the hallway outside completely empty. Cautiously, you phased the rest of the way through, looking left and right for any sign of soldiers.

It was deathly quiet. You walked carefully down the hallway, listening for any sounds. Hearing none, you figured that Integra’s words had merely been a threat to keep you from attempting escape. The perfect chance for you to go after your true target.

At the monastery, you had an all you could eat buffet. The monks provided an excellent food source, it broke your heart when those men came and took you away, but all good things must come to an end. Fearing you wouldn’t be able to find a steady food source for a little while, you knew you needed a meal, and something filling. The handsome man in red seemed perfect for the job.

You followed his scent through the maze of the basement. It was powerful, making your mouth water. It led you to a large room with nothing but candles and a coffin. There was no light, but you didn’t need it, succubi do their work at night after all.

His scent was coming from inside the coffin, making you realize his true nature. This wouldn’t be your first time feeding from a vampire, so you weren’t worried. You lifted the lid to his coffin slowly, preventing any squeaking. Setting the lid down gently, you paused to admire the view. It had been a while since the last time you were this excited for a meal.

You climbed into the coffin, placing your knees on either side of his thighs, your powers already working to put him into an even deeper sleep. With a devilish grin, you reached down and pulled his zipper down. Excitement built within you as you inched his pants and underwear lower and lower, revealing his cock inch by inch. When it finally came free from its confines, you marveled at the size.

“Holy shit,” You muttered.

No cock had ever intimidated you before now. You rose to every challenge, stretching yourself to the limit, but now was the first time you worried something wouldn’t fit. Giving it a few strokes, you felt it harden under your touch, getting even bigger in front of your eyes. You couldn’t resist giving it a lick, loving the taste of a true man.

As quickly as you could, you pulled your clothes off, exposing your waiting hole. Lifting yourself up, you lined his cock up with your entrance, refusing to waste another second. Lowering down, you pushed as hard as you could, forcing the tip inside of you. The slight burn of stretching was euphoric, a sensation you hadn’t felt in a while. When the tip finally popped inside, you moaned with satisfaction, feeling more fulfilled than you had fucking any of those old monks.

“Holy shit I needed this,” You moaned, preparing yourself to take the rest of him.

Suddenly, two hands grabbed your hips and forced you downward, shoving the rest of his dick inside of you, making you scream in shock and pleasure. Looking down, you saw Alucard smirking up at you.

“How-”

“Shut up,” He ordered, lifting you back up and thrusting up into you.

You weren’t ready to be fucked like this. Your prey is always asleep when you feed from them, so usually, you do all the work, but you had to admit you liked this. His cock was tearing you apart, giving you more pleasure than you’d ever felt before. For once, it seemed you were going to enjoy your meal.

“Fuck me harder!” You screamed, moving your hips in sync with his thrusts.

He laughed a dark laugh and quickened his pace. With each thrust, your beautiful feeding symbol began to appear on your belly. All Succubi have one, the design changes from case to case, but they all revolve around a heart. It glowed brightly, lighting up the room and illuminating his beautiful face.

Everything was going accordingly, soon he would cum, and you would suck the life right out of him, but you were slowly noticing a problem. You were enjoying it too much, bordering dangerous.

“I’m getting close. I need your seed,” You moaned, hoping to push him closer to the edge, but instead of growing erratic and sloppy, his thrusts merely got deeper.

It was overwhelming, your brain was growing foggy. This was bad, really bad.

“Slow down! You’re gonna make me cum,” You begged, placing your hands on his chest to try and stop his movements.

A second pair of hands appeared and pulled your arms away, pinning them above your head.

“Shut up and take me like a good little succubus,” He demanded, fucking you ruthlessly as you whined.

Your body clamped down on him suddenly as an incredible orgasm overtook you, shaking you to your very core. This was your first time cumming, and fuck it felt fantastic. Despite the voice in your head screaming a warning you let it happen, embracing the pleasure. He came soon after, shooting his side deep inside you, filling you with a renewed sense of vigor.

When you finally came down from cloud nine, you looked down at him with a shocked and terrified look on your face.

“Do you know what you just did?!” You screamed, his cock still inside you.

“Fucked you silly,” He replied with a laugh.

“You dumbass! You can’t make a succubus cum.”

“I just did.”

“Exactly! You’re not supposed to. If a succubus cums first, they become bound to their prey,” You explained, hopping off of him and pulling up your clothes, looking around frantically.

He grabbed you by the arm, holding you in place. His eyes were glowing red, fangs peaking out from under his lips.

“Perfect,” He replied, voice as smooth as velvet.

[fruitcoops]

To put it not-so-politely:

Remus getting RAILED the morning of his birthday and walking around in post-sex blissful state all day with shaky legs because he deserves nothing less!

Birthdays are a time for rewards, right? Coops credit goes to @lumosinlove! Part 1 of Loops’ birthday is here

TW for smut

Cuddles turned to kisses turned to pressing his fiancé into the mattress with his mouth and hips, and Remus wouldn’t have it any other way at ten am on his birthday.

Things…escalated after that.

The bedside clock read 11:15 through the hazy fog of his vision as Sirius shocked his system with praise and gentle, firm hands pressing into pleasure centers Remus didn’t even know he had. His thighs trembled uncontrollably and his hands ached from clenching the sheets so hard, but Sirius was steady behind him as he held him down with a palm between his shoulder blades.

“Are you alright?” Sirius murmured after a groan slipped from Remus’ mouth, only half-muffled by the pillow under his face.

He nodded, making a desperate sound that he would surely regret later once his brain came back online; Sirius’ low laugh made him shiver and grab for his free hand, pulling it to the mattress as an anchor. Every nerve was electric—every push sent waves of heat washing through him and he could only ride it out, twitching.

“Today is all about you, sweetheart,” Sirius said into the space just beneath his ear, snapping his hips and drawing a strangled noise from Remus’ lungs. “What was it you told me, again?”

“More,” Remus half-pleaded, half-gasped, pushing back. “More, oh, god.”

“That’s not what you told me, gorgeous. You look so good like this, bent over and begging. Talk about turning tables, huh?”

“Want it,” he whined.

“What do you want?” Silken lips trailed up his spine like a butterfly’s wings; the contrast was beyond overwhelming and his abdomen jolted. “It’s your birthday, after all.”

Remus’ throat constricted when Sirius’ dick slid over his prostate and his left leg nearly gave out under him—he saved it at the last second as the pullout made every muscle tense in bliss. “I want—I want—fuck, I dunno.” He buried his face in the pillow, melting under the pressure on his back. “Want you, don’t stop.”

“What did you tell me earlier?” Sirius asked again, biting down on the junction of his neck and scraping his teeth down the freckles that had started emerging over the past two weeks; Remus had seen his eyes track their steady appearance and the thought made his eyes flutter shut.

“Told you—mfg—told you I want to feel it,” he panted as he gripped Sirius’ hand. He could feel himself shaking through the thick need that coated his mind with each passing minute. “Told you I want to feel it all day, fuck me, that’s good.”

“Good job, sweetheart.” Sirius’ hand slid up into his hair and Remus moaned, louder than before at the static that crackled into his vision. He pressed an openmouthed kiss to the nape of his neck and squeezed Remus’ hipbone, then pushed all the way in and stopped.

“No!” Remus was practically frantic with need. “No, don’t stop, please.”

“Shhh.”

“Come on, baby, don’t do this to me.”

“Deep breaths, mon coeur. You said you wanted to feel it, right?” Sirius brushed the hair out of his eyes and leaned down to kiss Remus’ temple as he ground his hips in small, slow circles. “Is this okay?”

Remus nodded mutely; he could feel himself throbbing, so close to the crest if Sirius would just touch him once. He could hardly feel his arms anymore and let the tremors rock through him, picking apart every thread of consciousness he had left. The clock blinked back at him in double-vision—Sirius laughed again, soft and a little smug, when Remus fumbled back to grab his shoulder and yank him down.

“What do you need, sweetheart?” Sirius’ mouth was right next to his ear and he nipped the hinge of Remus’ jaw. “Is this too much?”

“Safe,” he blurted as the weight settled over him, heavy and warm. “Safe, unh, fuck, just hold me.”

“Alright.” He carefully detached his hand from Remus’ and braced it against the headboard, then wrapped the other arm around his torso while he decorated his upper back with kisses. “Like this?”

“Uh-huh.”

Remus wasn’t sure whether it was a tear or sweat that trickled down the side of his face as his body lit up like a flare, but he couldn’t muster enough coherent thought to figure it out. Who cared, anyway? Sirius was definitely sweaty as well, even though Remus hadn’t seen his face since he had been flipped over and pinned.

He was warm, warm, warm all over when Sirius finally reached down and closed his hand around Remus’ shaft, pulling him in steady strokes that didn’t fit at all with the heavy breaths cooling his neck. He said lovely things as he did it, but Remus didn’t register anything except the rough edge of his sex voice tingling all the way to his fingertips.

“Love you,” he mumbled around kiss-swollen lips, going a bit boneless in Sirius’ arms when he rubbed along the crown of his dick. “Fuck, fuck, love you, I’m gonna come, tell me I can—”

“You can have anything you want,” Sirius practically purred, mouthing along the line of his shoulder scar. “It’s your birthday, remember? You’ve held on so long; I’m surprised. You’ve been so good.”

Remus crumbled, shuddering and bucking back into Sirius, who continued to roll his hips in a slightly more erratic rhythm. “Keep going,” he managed once he could feel his tongue again. “You’re close, so keep going.”

“Really?”

“I told you I wanted to feel it, didn’t I?” Remus grinned up at Sirius; his jaw fell open a bit when he began to move again, but the smile stayed on as he arched his back and drew a moan from Sirius’ lips. It didn’t take much—ninety seconds and a particularly wanton whine from Remus later, Sirius dug his hands into his hips and spilled into him, pulling out once his heartrate slowed.

“You’re starting to sound like me,” he teased, smoothing his hands down Remus’ ribs before moving to lay next to him.

Remus stretched his back out as satisfaction made his blood hum, then tugged playfully on one of Sirius’ curls that fell into his eyes. “Small price to pay for a damn good birthday present. I will definitely be feeling that one.”

“I fucking hope so,” Sirius laughed. “If you couldn’t, I’d be worried.”

Remus nudged their noses together and rolled so he could hover over Sirius’ chest, dotting his face with kisses. “We have some scones left, right? And tea?”

“Mhmm.”

“Will you get me some?” he asked, sliding his mouth along Sirius’ jawline before soothing it with another kiss.

“Mmm—wait, what?” Sirius blinked. “You want me to what?”

Remus tilted Sirius’ chin up and rolled his lower lip between his teeth. “Will you get me a scone and some tea?”

Sirius paused to catch his breath, looking a bit dazed. “But it’s right downstairs.”

“All the way downstairs,” Remus sighed, trailing a hand along his collarbone and pressing him down a little more. “Will you?”

“Oh, no you don’t,” Sirius groaned, leaning out of the way when he bent down for another kiss. Remus tried to catch him again, but he pressed his lips together. “You are your magical kisses are not going to trick me into becoming a butler, honeybun.”

Time for Plan C. He pouted and tucked his hip against Sirius’ side, then combed a hand through his dark hair until his eyes went slightly unfocused. “Please, baby?”

Sirius let out a slow breath, muttering to himself under his breath before turning a mock-glare on Remus. “If you think you can cute your way into—"

“It’s my birthday,” Remus wheedled.

“Mon dieu, you’re persistent.” Sirius wrapped his arms around his ribs and pulled him down to lay halfway across his chest. “You’re also an imp sent to torment me specifically and you can’t fool me with the lip and the snuggling and the caramel eyes.”

Remus batted his eyelashes. “Is that a yes?”

“Scoot over, I need to get you a scone and some tea.” Sirius rolled his eyes, but he was smiling as he pressed their foreheads together and gave Remus a playful smack on the ass. “Petting my hair was a dirty trick, Lupin.”

“I’m here to torment you, specifically, remember?” he teased as Sirius stood up and pulled his pajama pants on. “I almost got you just by asking this time.”

“But you didn’t.”

“It was close.”

“But you didn’t.”

“But it was close.”

Sirius yanked the covers up and over Remus’ head before walking out the door, making him yelp. “Peppermint tea?”

“Yes, please,” Remus called around his laughter and he wrestled the blankets back down. “Thank you, Jeeves!”

“Menace!” He could hear the smile in Sirius’ voice, even halfway down the hall.

“I love you!”

“Love you, too, birthday imp!”

[supergraphicultramoderngirl]

sweet like the thunder on my tongue

pairing: willex

word count: 2786

tw for light swearing

It tumbles out of his mouth before he could even think about it: “But I don’t have any powers.”

Caleb smirks. “And who told you that?”

or, in which willie realizes his true strength.

taglist is in the reblogs, fic is under the cut!

—————

“Willie?”

The skater’s head pops up, cutting off the conversation he was having to look over at his boss.

“Can I see you for a moment? In my office?” Caleb gestures toward the stairwell.

Wordlessly, Willie follows him, only growing concerned when they walk right past the office and towards another room at the end of the hall which he’d never paid any mind to before. Was that door even there before? “Caleb, what’s going on?”

Caleb opened the door to the room and ushered him inside-- well, more shoved, but who is Willie to talk back to him right now-- while all Willie could do was look around and wait for Caleb to say something. The room was dark-- pitch black, actually, and he couldn’t see anything inside. He could now barely see his own hands, if not for the single hanging light above Caleb’s head as he stood in the hallway still, blocking the doorframe. With a wave of his fingers, Caleb pushed Willie down into some kind of, apparently, vantablack chair, metal clamps fastening around his wrists as soon as he reached the seat. Caleb leaned against the doorframe, seemingly inspecting his nails. “You’ve betrayed me, William.”

Willie steels himself, squeezing his eyelids shut, and replies, “I, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” His efforts to cover his tracks were pitiful, to be completely honest. He wasn’t sure how much energy he had left at that point; before he’d met the band— before he’d met Alex— he thought that the best thing about the afterlife was that he could do what he wanted for as long as he wanted, day in and day out, as long as he came back to the club to do the shows. But now, his entire perspective has been shaken up, and he’s honestly gotten sick of doing the same things every single day. Why should he go see the same sights he’s seen since 1983 when he could be screaming in a museum, or stealing an entire fucking bus, or anything that can actually make a connection between him and another person?

Except, now he can’t even do that anymore. His connections are gone. They all crossed over (except for Julie, who never saw him in the first place), and he was left to his own devices, again. Willie isn’t sure what else there is for him to do, and in all transparency, if he hasn’t figured out his unfinished business yet, he doubts he ever will. Caleb putting him out of his misery now would probably just save him a lot of trouble.

“Don’t be coy,” Caleb jabs at him, standing up straight. “After all I’ve done for you? I gave you a place to stay, food to eat, things to do, and this is how you repay me? You help my recruits escape?”

Willie sighs, the helplessness beginning to overwhelm him. “What does it matter, anyway? They’ve crossed over, you don’t have competition anymore, right?”

“William, the boys are still out there. And they’ve lost their stamps.” Willie freezes. They lost their stamps? Alex is alive— or, at least, as alive as he can be? “Regardless, I have never been worried about competition. Those boys have power, power that could rival my own. I can’t just have that out there in the world, where it could fall into the wrong hands, now, can I?” Caleb sneers, a sickenly sweet smirk on his face.

Furrowing his brows, Willie rushes out in reply, “They’re playing in a pop rock band, they’re practically harmless, what could they even—”

“You don’t get it, do you?” Caleb interrupts, his icy eyes boring into Willie’s own.

Willie shuts his mouth and swallows his nerves. And maybe his pride.

Caleb leans forward, his hands gripping the arms of the chair. “I can’t have anyone’s power rival my own. That would steal away my precious audience, my empire that I’ve built over the last hundred years. Every ghost in my club would otherwise be a threat to me, had they not signed away their powers when they sold me their souls. With their powers under my possession, I have full reign over any paranormal capabilities that this world could possibly hold.” He stands back up. “I’ve kept my enemies close, you could say.”

It tumbles out of his mouth before he could even think about it: “But I don’t have any powers.”

Caleb smirks. “And who told you that?”

Willie was looking right at him. He feels no need to answer, and even if he wanted to, his mouth is going dry and there’s a lump in his throat preventing him from doing anything other than remaining still.

“Don’t get your hopes up about the boys still being here, William,” Caleb says after a moment. “They won’t be when you get out.” He slams the door, leaving Willie in the room, with nothing but dark, dark, dark, alone.

***

“Alright, where’s our first stop?” Luke asks as Julie shrugs her backpack over her shoulder and takes a sip from her water bottle. She and the boys were walking down Sunset Boulevard, her with Airpods in so she could talk to the boys without getting odd looks from others. Julie was planning a sleepover with Flynn for the following night, and the boys jumped at the chance to help her run errands, since hanging out in the studio was getting a little boring.

“Can we stop for pizza? I know we can’t eat it, but at least I can smell it!” Reggie pleads, using his puppy dog eyes.

“Reg, that face only works on Luke and Alex. You can smell it tomorrow night when she’s over, yeah?” Julie jokes. “I was thinking—”

A dark, purple smoke appears in front of them, causing them to stumble and still themselves, the boys’ faces all paling once they realize who’s in front of them.

Caleb smiles, sickeningly sweet. “Hello, boys. And you must be Julie.”

***

He has powers.

Willie has powers, and he hadn’t known this entire fucking time.

This guy, who was supposed to be Willie’s mentor for the past, who knows, thirty-ish years now, who he had once looked up to, who had taken him in has his own, who had given him a way to keep track of time again, who somehow knew he had powers that he couldn’t manage on his own, did all of it for his own advantage. He used him to gain more power and control, while making Willie think he cared. Thirty fucking years.

Right now, he’s trapped in this room, yeah, but Willie feels more suffocated by the hurt and confusion surrounding him more than anything else. He can’t stand that Alex and the boys are probably out there right now, about to be destroyed by Caleb, because of him, again. He hates that nearly all of his afterlife has just been a giant fucking lie. And with these stupid new-but-not-really powers, he doesn’t even know where to start. So, he does what he knows best.

Willie screams.

He cries a bit too, but mostly he screams until his voice grows hoarse.

Ever since he passed away, he’s always loved the feeling that grows in his chest when he screams, knowing that he can just take up so much space without anyone (or at least, anyone important) hearing. It hurts sometimes, obviously, but really it just feels like lightning forming in his veins, sparking against his the walls of his skin, ready to burst through.

He doesn’t notice until he takes a gasp for air that this time, it actually has.

Willie gasps again, this time in shock. It’s a bright, brilliant green, wires of light darting across his fingertips and palms. He doesn’t know what to do with it.

Willie squeezes his eyes shut and makes two fists, willing the stinging of the lightning to go away by distracting himself with the stinging of his own fingernails. He realizes then that he’s created light, that he’s given himself a way out, so he reopens his hands and holds them out, looking for the door that Caleb had previously slammed. He spots it and moves to get up, almost forgetting about his arm braces. He curses under his breath, and begins to rack his brain for a way out of them, the green still dancing around his arms.

He screams again.

***

They’d been cornered into an alleyway, which was probably best for any bystander’s sanity, anyway, but it meant that they were trapped by Caleb. Again.

“What do you want with us?” Luke had asked when Caleb first appeared, walking in front of Julie with a guarding arm.

Caleb had sighed in reply, taking a step forward, “Oh, I’ve decided I don’t need you three anymore. You’re not of any use to me, not without your lifer by your side. Without a life source, you’re about as powerful as any other regular ghost. I just need her.”

Luke stood fully in front of Julie then, Reggie and Alex flanking him to protect her. “You will never get to her,” Alex had chimed in, ice in his tone.

“Bold statement from someone who still chooses to hide behind his friends.” Alex had looked down at his shoes in shame, face turning red. “Oh, don’t worry, we all know you’re not brave enough to take me on by yourself,” Caleb chuckled to himself. “Besides, you boys seem to have forgotten how powerful I am— or can we do without the reminder?” Caleb added, lifting his hand as a wisp of purple smoke curled around it.

Now, after putting up a decent fight, they stand against the building as dark purple webs tangle over them, effectively pinning them down. Julie strains against them as they burn into her skin, pointedly not looking at Caleb who is inches away. Caleb puts a finger to her chin, causing her to look into his eyes. Julie sucks on her teeth, willing herself not to cry any more than she already has. “Quite a shame that such talent, such heart has to go to waste,” Caleb says, before his hand begins to glow in a manner that Julie knows could only lead to her demise.

He’s interrupted, however, by a slew of car alarms going off. Caleb swivels his head to look over at the main road, now realizing that it’s… empty?

Almost moving to walk over, Caleb hesitates just enough for the webs’ strength to weaken, and the boys poof out of their hold. They immediately begin trying to pull the web of magic off of Julie, succeeding in doing so once they notice that Caleb’s attention is no longer on them. He’s in the road now, staring down the horizon line.

“He’s distracted now, let’s poof to the studio to buy some time,” Reggie says, but Luke quickly counters, “Julie can’t poof. We would have to go back down the road, anyway.”

While Luke and Reggie are trying to figure out what to do, Julie’s eyes stray over to Alex, who is now peering around the corner of the building, eyebrows furrowed. He suddenly runs over to the road, and Julie calls after him. The three run to catch up to Alex and stand in terror just a few feet behind Caleb, who is still seemingly frozen in place.

They feel it before they can see it.

The hair on their arms and the backs of their necks begin to stand on end, a quiet humming in the atmosphere causing an adrenaline rush kind of energy around them. The humming thrums into a pulse, concentrating around what Caleb must’ve been looking at; a sharp, sparking green light floating in the air down the road. It grows bigger and bigger, until a silhouette suddenly appears in its place, looking at the ground. “Hey, Caleb!”

Alex’s heart stops when he realizes who it is.

Willie looks up from the ground and begins to make his way over, thunderous step by thunderous step. His eyes shine fully in bright green, almost like the lightning inside of him was leaking out. He reaches forward and a beam of crackling light shoots forward, splitting and clasping itself around Caleb’s wrists in constraint. With rumbling intensity, Willie continues, “You lied to me. You’ve been lying to me my entire afterlife, pretending to care. Every time you stamped someone, you told me it was because they would be dangerous otherwise, that you were just ‘protecting the ghost world’, and then you turn and do it to my friends. You’ve hurt me, you’ve hurt the people I care about, and it doesn’t even matter to you. I don’t even want to know the number of other ghosts you’ve screwed over like you have us.” Willie heaves in a breath, his arm beginning to shake as Caleb tries to overpower him with his own powers. “I can’t let you do this anymore.”

Caleb grits through his teeth, “You don’t get much of a say, William, I own you.”

“Not anymore.” Willie screams again, causing the beam shooting out of his palm to reinforce itself, the sparks around Caleb’s wrists slowly crawling around his skin until it looked like his veins were filled with light. “You aren’t strong enough to beat me, William, I know you more than you know yourself. You can’t do this,” Caleb tries, but Willie just screams louder, drowning him out.

The screams nearly shake the air, causing Julie to lean on Luke for support, with Reggie resting a hand on her shoulder. Alex wants to reach out, to do something, but he knows there’s nothing he really can do to help. He knew Willie was one of a kind, it was obvious from every interaction they’d had up to that point, but he never expected him to be that powerful. It was terrifying, if he was being honest. And Alex didn’t want to be scared of him, especially while he was literally putting his life on the line for them, but it was almost as if Willie was losing control.

Wait.

A small, dwindling purple smoke emits from Caleb’s palms, encircling the cuffs on his wrists, and the green light inside of him dims. Willie is panting in between his screams, running out of energy. Inhaling sharply, Alex doesn’t think twice before bolting over to him, ignoring the protests from his friends.

Alex stands behind him and grips his hands onto Willie’s shoulders, focusing all of his energy into his fingertips, just like he had on that day in the museum. And, just like that day, he screams with Willie, hoping and praying to a god he no longer believes in that it helps, that it works.

It does.

The lightning bursts out at a rapid speed, nearly enveloping Caleb, almost as if it was tearing him apart, atom by atom. It grows brighter, and brighter, and brighter, until—

He’s gone. Small ashes lie in the spot where Caleb once stood, now dissipated into thin air.

Willie collapses to the ground in exhaustion and Alex grasps onto him, as if he’ll disappear himself if he lets go. After a brief moment, Willie takes a sharp breath, wincing in a burning, stinging type of pain, and lets out a breath of relief once it goes away. He knows exactly what that was, he could feel it; his soul was finally back in his body.

Willie looks down at his wrist. The familiar stamp from the Hollywood Ghost Club is still there, however it no longer has its signature purple sheen. It’s black and faded now, like a thirty-year-old tattoo he’s come to regret.

“Are you okay?” Alex asks, pulling away, his face the picture of worry. Willie notices then that Julie, Luke, and Reggie are knelt next to him, too, their own expressions almost as bad as Alex’s.

Willie smiles a sad smile. It’s a weak thing, but it’s genuine. “You’re still here.”

Recognition washes over Alex’s face, and he softly lifts his hand to Willie’s chin. “Of course I am. I told you, I’d follow you anywhere, yeah?”

Willie chuckles and ducks his head. “Yeah, well, somehow, you did.”

Alex lightly pulls on his chin so he can look him in the eye, a burning intensity present there that Willie hasn’t seen in, well, thirty years. “We can explain that later, okay? I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

Willie does a small nod. “I will be.”

Alex pulls him back into a tight hug, and Willie sinks into his arms. He knows they’ll both ask questions later; all that matters right now is that they’re there, that they’ve got each other.

And now, they always will.

[t-lostinworlds]

Hold On (Tom Holland)

a/n: hello, surprise? but yes, so, i was kind of in a funk for a bit and when that happens, i write angst. then i heard the song (i was listening to my sad playlist as u do aha) and here we are. i wrote this fairly quick so bear with it as it may seemed rushed (it is) so it may be bad heh. also, i suggest listening to the song while reading for full effect.

pairing: tom holland x female reader summary: You locked yourself in the bathroom when things got overwhelming. Tom felt worried when it went quiet inside for too long, heart stopping by what he saw when he broke through the door. based on song: Hold On - Chord Overstreet warnings: drug overdose (vaguely written & only on tom's pov), angst, brief panic attack, open(?) but happy ending. word count: 3.2k+

masterlist on bio & pinned post

-:-:-:-:-

**US/UK HELPLINES & FREE 24/7 SUICIDE HOTLINES IN DIFFERENT COUNTRIES**

~~~

"I can't do better in helping if you don't tell me what's wrong Y/N," Tom said softly, concerned eyes staring right into your troubled ones.

He had his arms open wide as he slowly inched towards your trembling form, making sure to not get too close, too fast. He doesn't want to overwhelm you by being all over your personal space, he doesn't want to stress you out even more by crowding you. Tom knew he needed to be gentle, patient, giving you enough space to breath but also showing that you can jump into his arms whenever you need to, whenever you're ready to.

"That's the thing Tom, I don't know what's wrong," you started with a shaky intake of breath. "I just feel this pit in my stomach and sometimes it gets so overwhelming in my head about everything, about what I'm even doing with my life, if I'm doing enough, if I am enough. I'm overthinking about everything and I just feel so lost and angry for not knowing what's wrong with me. And I—I am so tired," you admitted, tears slipping down your cheeks as you ran your palm over your face in frustration.

To see your agitated state, to hear the hurt and frustration in your voice, added with your heavy words, it just broke Tom's heart to pieces. You didn't need to elaborate what you meant by 'being tired' because he understood, both physically, emotionally, but especially mentally. And Tom's frown could only deepen as you continued.

"And you can't do better Tom, you don't need to. You've already done so much for me. You've put up with my shit for so long. I've already put you through so much," you trailed off at the end of your sentence, bottom lip quivering as you stared at him with utter guilt.

The look of distress on his features was hurting you so much. You just want to see him happy, that's what he truly deserves. But now it seems like you're not giving him that anymore. Not giving him enough happiness, just nights of him being worried about you, stressed because of you.

"I feel like lately, all I've done is be a burden to my family, to everyone in my life, but even more to you."

Tom shook his head frantically as he took a few steps forward. "No, don't say that love," he whispered.

Once he reached a safe distance, he gently took your hand in his, touch soft, comforting. You let him hold you, eyes trained on the way your fingers intertwined but never looking up. You couldn't bear to hold his gaze, especially with the obvious sadness that swam in them.

"Darling, look at me," Tom coaxed, giving your hands a tender squeeze. With a deep intake of breath, you willed yourself to meet his eyes again. Those brown orbs bring you so much happiness, and to see them filled with everything but, to know that you're the sole reason why they're not coated with that lovely glow, it only makes you feel guiltier.

"You know that's not true Y/N," he said firmly, but you only shook your head at him with a soft whimper, his voice unable to break through the loud screams that filled your mind.

"Angel, you are not a burden to me. I'll always be here for you no matter what, remember? Didn't I promise you that, love?" Tom tried again, both hands going to cup your face as he gently wiped your tears away with his thumb. "When I said I wanted to be here for you, with all the joy and the chaos, all the demons we're made of, I meant that with every beat of my heart Y/N."

"But you deserve so much better Tom," you croaked, nimble fingers wrapping around his wrists, leaning into his warm touch with bottom lip jutted out as fresh tears dampened your cheeks once more.

"No, I don't," Tom objected. "You're all I want, all I ever need, please believe that, believe me Y/N," he whispered, forehead pressed up against yours as his eyes held nothing but truth.

Still, it wasn't enough to help subside the roaring demons in your mind. Not because Tom didn't hold any importance or his words any power, no, he's everything to you. But tonight they just happen to be a lot stronger, the loud and guttural voices. They were blocking anything that's trying to get through to you, blocking the only thing that always seemed to easily get through to you which was Tom.

"I just—I need to think. I-I need to be alone," you muttered under your breath. Although reluctant, Tom nodded, figured that if that was what you wanted, then he will give it to you.

"Okay," he sighed, placing a tender kiss on your forehead, the warmth of his lips on your skin making you close your eyes with a shaky breath. It was a sweet, rather mundane kiss, but it was one that lasted a few seconds longer than normal before he lets you go. Tom's grip around you slowly loosened, your heart growing heavier as you feel his touch gradually disappear.

You quickly turned on your heel with your head down, arms wrapped around your body to stop you from crumbling to the floor. Tom hesitantly stood still in his place, a certain feeling in his gut growing as he watched you walk towards the bathroom. As you were about to shut the door, his voice stopped you.

"Y/N?" he called out.

You turned around with a hum, meeting those brown orbs you've grown to adore with every inch of you. So many emotions were swimming in them, but only one struck you the most, even more so when he opened those lips to let it out into the air, loud, clear and sincere.

"I love you."

You gave him a small smile, trying your best to suppress your sobs as more tears ran down your cheek. And softly, you said,

"I love you too Tom, so much."

There was something about the way your voice trembled that made Tom feel even more uneasy, but he decided to let it go, thought that it was just him stressing over nothing at all.

The bathroom door slamming shut was what he heard next, a frustrated hand running through his hair as he stared at the white painted wood for a whole minute. With a sharp exhale of breath, Tom looked at it for a few seconds more.

Once he heard the running water on the sink, he made his way out of your shared bedroom, body slumped with deep frown still intact. His demeanor was quick to catch the attention of his brother who was sitting on the living room couch, the only other person in the house as of the moment.

"Is she okay?"

Tom could only flash Harry a sad, forced smile, not speaking any words as he went straight to the kitchen to get you some water and a bit of food. You haven't eaten anything yet and it was worrying him even more.

It wasn't long until Tom was back in the bedroom, setting the glass of water and the plate of your favorite sandwich on the nightstand.

The silence that filled the room was uncanny, nervousness coating the lad slowly as he stood completely still. Tom's eyes landed on the closed door of the bathroom, a lump forming in his throat as he found the negative thoughts that grew in his mind harder to ignore.

He took long strides towards the door, pressing an ear on the surface as he tried to listen to something, hoping to hear anything. Tom felt his heart quicken its pace as the silence screamed in his ear, brain quick to jump into horrible, dreadful conclusions.

"Darling? Are you okay in there?" he called, fingers twitching as his eyes landed on the metal knob.

No response...

"Darling?" Tom tried again, voice even louder, fear growing stronger as he grabbed the doorknob, chills running down his spine once the cold surface touched his skin.

Silence...

"Y/N, if you're not going to answer I'm kicking this fucking door down," Tom growled frantically, grip on the doorknob tightening as he tried to shake it open.

Nothing...

With an anxious breath, Tom walked away until he reached a safe distance, lifting a leg up and with all his might, kicked the door just by the keyhole, the wood snapping in its place as it swung open.

Tom ran inside but immediately froze, blood drained out of his whole body at the sight of you, heart coming to a halt for a full second as he shook his head in utter fear.

"No, no, no," he rushed, scrambling towards your limp, unconscious form on the white tiled floor, the bottle of painkillers right beside you, so close to empty. Tom was breathing rapidly as he pulled you onto his lap, vision turning blurry as he cleared the hair away from your face.

"Y/N! Wake up love, p-please wake up," Tom stammered, fingers shaking as he brought it up to your neck to the side of your windpipe, urgently feeling for your heartbeat. Cold sweats coated his entire body once he felt a faint one. It was there, but barely.

"No, don't—p-please don't leave me!" he cried out, head pounding as he shifted in his place, adrenaline at an all-time high as he hoisted you up in his arms. "Harry! Harry please!" Tom screamed after his brother as he rushed outside the bathroom and into the hallway, the lad in question rushing towards his brother's voice with sheer worry on his freckled face.

"What—"

"Start the car! Her breathing is getting slower," Tom choked on his words. The twin didn't waste any time as he bolted towards the kitchen island to grab the keys and went straight to the front door, held it open until Tom was out with you, alarmingly unmoving in his hold.

Once the car door was slammed shut with you and Tom in the backseat, Harry veered right out of the driveway and drove fast like your life depended on it, because it did.

Tom kept you close to his heaving chest, mumbling sweet but desperate nothings against your hair, silently praying as he tried his best to contain his shock.

The slower your heart beats, the faster Tom's heart raced, your body cold to the touch, his head spinning at the dreadful feeling. Tom felt so helpless just staring at your expressionless features, his clammy palms resting on your cheek as he kept talking to you.

"Hold on, I still want you angel, please hold on," he whispered over and over, hoping that you were able to hear him, hoping that the sound of his voice will stop you from fading into the light.

He was glad that the drive to the hospital was only five minutes away, but with you lying still, turning colder by the second in his arms, time seemed to go slower, agonizingly slower. There was no doubt that it was the longest, most painful five minutes Tom has ever endured in his life.

***

The bright hospital lights were blinding the moment Tom rushed inside with you in his arms, his voice hoarse as he screamed for help until the nurses came to your aid. They took you away on the table, your whole body lying motionless as they checked for your pulse. He didn't want to let you go, didn't want to let you out of his sight in fear that it would be the last time he'll see you with a bit of life left. But despite his protests, he was met by double doors slamming closed on his face.

Both of Tom's hands tugged at his hair in pure agitation, bottom lip caught between his teeth to try and suppress his sobs. He was pacing anxiously as his eyes kept steady on the door of the room where you disappeared into, lungs struggling to provide oxygen, unable to keep up with his raging heart.

He felt a hand grabbed at his shoulder, unable to see the person as they immediately pulled him in for a tight hug. But he didn't need to, he knew who it was, he knew what his brother's embrace felt like. Tom's whole body shook in Harry's hold as loud and broken sobs came out of him, arms wrapping around his brother for mere support, knowing that his legs are about to give out any second.

"I d-don't want to lose her, I can't lose her H-Harry, I—" Tom felt his throat start to close up, his grip around his younger brother turning vice-like as he gasped for air.

"Hey, hey Tom, breathe," Harry rushed, grabbing Tom's shoulders, pulling him away and holding him in arm's length. "You're alright, just breathe."

Tom shut his eyes tight and tried to regain his breathing, calming himself as best as he could. A whimper came out of him as he shook his head slowly, opening his eyes to meet Harry's with nothing but utmost fear and pain swimming in them.

"I c-can't imagine a world without her, I can't—"

"Then don't. You're not losing her Tom. She's going to be fine. She's a very strong girl. You, out of all people, know that," Harry reassured, giving his shoulder a squeeze for good measure.

"Fuck, this is all my fault. I shouldn't have left her alone. I knew something wasn't right before she even—I should've tried harder," Tom sobbed as he ran his shaking fingers through his hair, bottom lip quivering as he casted his eyes on the floor in shame.

"Tom you did the best that you could. No one could've seen this coming. Y/N wouldn't want you blaming yourself. You know it hurts her when you blame yourself," Harry said softly, rubbing his back comforting as he shot him a knowing look.

Tom rubbed the nape of his neck as he nodded with deep, strangled breaths. He pressed his lips into a tight line as he didn't say another word because Harry was right. You always get even more upset when you see him blame himself for something out of his control.

"You just sit here and wait alright? I'm going to get you some water."

He only shot Harry a small but thankful smile, the younger lad giving him one last hug before he disappeared down the opposite side of the hallway.

Tom cleared his mind and thought of nothing but you being safe. You are going to be safe, alive and well, because he wouldn't know what to do with himself if you weren't.

***

It was an hour and half later until the doctor came out. Tom scrambled on his feet as she asked about who was there for you. His nails were digging into his palms, creating crescent shapes on the skin as he held his breath, dreadfully waiting for her to speak.

"We've managed to pump all the drugs out of her system. She's stable now but still unconscious," the doctor said. Tom lets out a big puff of breath, his whole body relaxing as he felt the weight of the universe lift off his shoulders. Tom grabbed onto Harry for support once he almost lost his balance, just feeling relieved to hear that you were fine, still breathing.

"Is she going to be okay?" Harry asked when Tom can't seem to form any words, the older brother squeezing his shoulder as a way to silently say thank you.

The doctor nodded with a small smile. "We still need to keep a close eye on her until she makes a full recovery. There are still a few dangers that can occur given that she's consumed quite a handful."

Tom stood straighter as he cleared his throat, "Can I see her?"

"Right this way."

***

The sound of the soft beeps of the heart rate monitor oddly felt comforting to Tom as he entered the room. It was a mixture of relief but also hurt the moment his eyes landed on your sleeping form, hooked up to all these wires and tubes as you lay peacefully on the white bed.

He would've just stood still on his place, just staring with a deep from if Harry hadn't given him an encouraging tap on back. Tom flashed him a small smile before Harry closed the door, giving Tom some time alone with you for as long as he needed.

Slowly, he made his way over to your side, pulling up a chair beside the bed and letting out a shaky breath once he sat down. It was when he reached over to hold your hand did Tom start to bawl his eyes out, body shaking with full on sobs as he lifted your nimble fingers and pressed it on his damp, flushed cheek.

"You're okay. You're going to be okay love," he whimpered, not sure if he was saying those words to reassure you or himself. He turned his head to place a warm, tender kiss on your palm before he cupped your hand with both of his, his thumb sweetly stroking the back of it.

"It may sound selfish but you know I can't just let you go. I'm not that strong. Not as strong as you," Tom paused, giving your hand a squeeze, just waiting patiently for you to return it. "So, come on, darling, come back to me," Tom begged, a choked sob following after as his teardrops soaked the white sheets.

"I still need you. I will always need you," he continued, voice merely above a whisper as he tried his best to keep his breathing steady. "You're going to wake up and tell me to take you home, yeah?"

"We're going home," Tom breathed out with a small nod. "You're going to come back to me, and we're going home." Tom's voice broke at the end of his sentence, his head dropping low as he screwed his eyes shut, an overwhelming feeling rising in him that he couldn't stop the tears from falling continuously.

Tom just wants you to be back in his arms, wants you safe and warm in the comfort of your shared bed. He just wants to hear your hearty laugh echo in the kitchen as you make breakfast together. He wants to hear your scolding whenever he leaves dirty clothes on the floor, or the little arguments on whose turn it was to load the dishwasher.

Tom just wants to take you home.

Then once you do, once you come back home, he will take your hand and make things right, help make things better. And with all that he is, all that he has, with every beat of his heart, Tom will swear to love you all his life.

"Come home to me Y/N."

It was then Tom felt it, the light squeeze around his hand, his head shooting up as he looked at you expectantly. It was completely unmatched, the utter joy and relief that coated every inch of his bones. The sound was music to his ears, happiness filling him up to the brim once he heard your sweet, lovely voice.

"Tom?"

~~~

“Place your hand over your heart, can you feel it? That is called purpose. You’re alive for a reason so don’t ever give up.” – Unknown

-:-:-:-:-

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[skytimil]

Want it forever |Bakugou Katsuki

A/N: hii! Here I am with yet another Bakugou scenario lmao. I really play favorites, don’t I? ok this was a burst of inspiration I had yesterday at midnight, and even though I was half asleep, I just though the idea was so adorable I had to write it down. I hope you enjoy.

Words: 2.6K

Genre: fluffiest fluff possible

Warnings: swearing (because Bakugou), characters are adults, AND FINALLY beware of your heart, because you may pass out because of the adorableness in this.

If you want to request scenarios or drabbles, feel free to do so.

If you want, you can find other works in my masterlist

---------------

Walking up and down in the kitchen, you were making sure if not only the food you were preparing was good, but also if the decor and plating looked decent. They were Bakugou’s parents after all and you were meeting them for the first time. Katsuki’s mom had insisted to have dinner at their house, but Katsuki knew how nervous you were going to be, so he arranged something in his apartment. He was supposed to cook, but you said you’d do it, because you want to cause a good first impression.

You and Katsuki had been dating for almost a year, but both your hero jobs were so exhausting, you still hadn’t met his parents, even though he met yours already, a couple months ago.

So, now, with your cooking skills to the test, you prepare dinner with the most care you’ve ever cooked something before, while you had Bakugou help you out with the table.

“You have seen this table at least one hundred fucking times. The fork won’t change place while you’re not in here.” He complains when he sees you aligning the cutlery for the last time, after you turned off the oven.

You wipe your hands to the apron you have on, taking it off and put it in its place, flashing a deadly look to your boyfriend afterwards.

“You know very well I want to make a good impression.” You state crossing your arms over your chest.

“I just don’t think that the form how I display my cutlery is going to make them hate you.” He voiced, raising an eyebrow at you. “I know you’re nervous, but I really think they’ll love you.” He says softly, walking up to you.

“I said I’m not nervous.” You retaliate, looking to the plate in front of you instead of looking at him.

“Clearly.” He voices as he stops in front of you.

“What if... it’s just... what if they don’t like my seasoning?” You utter, letting your arms fall to your sides.

“I think the seasoning is amazing, babe.” The blond assures you kissing the tip of your nose while placing his hands softly on the sides of your arms. Bakugou could be a literal sweetheart once he knew you were really nervous. He knew that was not much he could do about the situation unless trying to ease you up a bit and even though he can’t really express through words, he’d try his best to help you feel more relaxed.

“Thank you.” You smile to his gesture, looking at him in the eyes. “I love you.”

“So do I, you idiot.” He answers with blushed cheeks and leans in to close the gap between your lips. “I love you so fucking much.”

The bell interrupts your little loving moment, remembering your brain to freak out again.

“Calm down, they’ll love you. I just know they will.” He states, planting a last kiss on your forehead and guiding you both to the hallway.

Bakugou opens the door and two smiling figures stand facing you, making your nerves ease a little bit. Maybe this wasn’t going to be so bad.

“Y/n! It’s so nice to finally meet you!” His mom, Mitsuki, advances to enter the house and give you a tight hug, to which you respond the same way. “You have no idea how long we’ve been tearing Katsuki’s patience to meet you!” She looks at you with a big smile. “You are so pretty, how did you end up with this hot headed?” The question makes you giggle and blush at the compliment.

“Thank you very much. It’s so nice to meet you as well.” You answer still a little nervous and a little unsure of how to act in front of them.

“What the hell are you saying, old hag. Did you forget you’re in my house?” Katsuki interrupts, taking a step in.

“Hello, Y/n, it’s so nice to finally meet you.” Masaru stepped inside the house as well, while his wife and son were having what seemed like a typical quarrel in the background.

“It’s very nice to meet you, Mr. Bakugou.” You smile at the nice man in front of you. His voice and smile were so calm, it almost made your worries go away.

You all enter the kitchen and they start to take their places at the table while you put the dish you prepared in the middle, the good smell of it spreading through the room.

“I made dinner and I hope it’s up to your taste.” You smile as you take your place next to Katsuki.

“Did this damn son of mine made you cook?! That’s not how I raised you, Katsuki!” Mitsuri glares at her son’s direction, making you quickly intervene, before the man next to you explodes and starts another fight with his mom.

“No, no, I insisted to be me. I wanted to.” You smile at them, receiving two proud smiles back.

“It smells amazing, dear.” Masaru voices, taking the smell in. “Can I?” He motions to the big spoon as of asking permission to fill in the plates.

“Of course!”

Masaru takes Mitsuri plate, putting it agin in front of her, now full. You couldn’t help but think of how adorable the action was, and compare it to your boyfriend, who’d do it all the time as well. He really is a good soul like his father. After they’re both served and Bakugou serves your plate as well as his, you all begin to eat and you wait for any type of reaction from the people in front of you.

“Oh dear!” Mitsuri exclaim, making you look at her and anticipating an answer. “This is really good!” She smiles at you. “You need to tell me how you made this.”

With the biggest smile on your face, the night continues with a pleasant atmosphere, good food, good company and good conversation. Your boyfriend’s parents were two of the nicest people you’ve ever met, and that made you finally and totally open up to them.

You’ll certainly have many more dinners like this one, you were going to be part of the family after all.

The hours flew by at such speed, when you notice you were saying goodbye to his parents and waving as they rush to the elevator and escape from the cold hallway from the building. Bakugou closes the door and smiles at you.

“Very nervous at the beginning weren’t you?” He smirks, looking at you directly, making you blush.

“Shut up.” You look away, a smile creeping your lips. “They were amazing.” You give in, smiling at him.

“I told you they’d love you.” He walks to you, hugging your figure and he places his chin above your head. You close you eyes, hugging him back and place you face over his chest, inhaling his sweet caramel scent.

You stay like that for a few minutes, appreciating each other’s presence, until you have to break the moment.

“I should really go home... It’s late.” you inform, not letting go of him.

“Stay here tonight.” He proposes, making you look at him.

“You want me to stay?” You ask in a charming voice.

Bakugou’a cheeks turns a light shade of pink when he nods. “I mean, you just met my parents, it’s pretty much official.”

“Official? I thought we were already official.” You state a little confused. All of your friends knew you were dating each other, so his words were a making you genuinely confused.

“I mean... not like that... I meant... for life.” He stutters, looking away.

You stare in confusion until you finally understand what he means and a wave of happiness rushes through your entire body, making you smile amazingly bright.

“Katsuki is that... is that your way of asking me to marry you?” You ask in a happy tone you could not contain. At the moment Bakugou notices there’s no hesitation from your part, he looks at you, all the nerves going away from his body.

“Do you want to marry me?” He questions you, looking you in the eyes. Oh those loving eyes he has only for you.

“Of-fucking course I do.” You answer and without any second waste, you bring your lips to clash with his in a passionate kiss.

“I’m sorry I don’t have a ring. The idea just popped into my head and I had to ask you, I didn’t even prepare nothing-“ he blurts, worrying about how your idea perfect propose of engagement would be far away from the one he just did to you.

“Do you really think that’s important?” You interrupt him, taking his face in your hands. “I don’t need any fancy set ups, food, balloons or candles. I really just need you.” You smile lovingly to the man in front of you, receiving another smile back. “I just can’t believe you want to spend your life with me... that feeling alone is enough to surpass anything you’d ever prepare me.” That’s why you were so perfect for him. He hated to do those corny things all couples do and you don’t really feel the need of him to come out of his comfort zone to know that he loves you. He shows you that every day, by doing the simplest things, or making the simplest gestures. He was much more a man of action than a man of words, so he’d often caress your arm while you’re in the couch together watching a movie, or pull you in for an exhilarating and breathtaking kiss. That was Bakugou’s way, and that was all you needed.

Bakugou’s stomach is involved by a feeling of at least a dozen butterflies, all fluttering their wings. That’s the feeling of spending the rest of his days with you.

“Spending my life with you...” he mutters under his breath, making you look at him, which causes the butterflies to start fluttering even more. He loved your eyes and the way that that little twinkle in them is shown for him and for him alone. He shoots you a smirk, placing his of his hands on your hip and the other on your cheek, bringing you closer to him. “I love how that sounds, so damn much.” He pulls you into another kiss filled with passion, desire of being with you. The feeling was overwhelming, just like the way you felt about each other. You complete one another, and being together, starting a family, has no other feeling that wasn’t absolute certainty. Both of you were certain that the person in front of your was the one. You were made for each other.

Bonus:

Bakugou had been standing, staring at the front door for far too long. You were inside, probably organizing all of your things because you had just moved in. He wanted to help you, of course, but you used your day off and he had no one to fill in for him at the agency, so he had no choice. You, of course, told him that it was okay, you could very well take the boxes from your old apartment to his, because he had helped you to pack your things before, so a third of it was done.

But Bakugou was at the front door now, he came home from work and he finally has it. He got a call while he was working, and after he was finished, he went to pick up the little box at the store. He was so nervous, even though he had done this before. Why was he so nervous? Fucking damn it. He swears in his head, gathering some courage and he takes the key out to open the door to his, now, shared apartment with you. Just that feeling itself is overwhelming, making his hands start to sweat a little bit more.

“I’m home.” He announces after closing the door and he takes his shoes off, placing them in the little cabinet at the entrance, leaving his keys at the top of the furniture as well.

“Welcome home!” He listen your excited voice, and hears you pace down to the hallway. Before you enter is field of vision, Bakugou places his hand above his pocket, so he can feel the little box in there again, making sure it had not somehow escaped and make that another thing for him to worry about. But no, the box was still there, quietly. Like boxes do. Could you blame him though? He was so nervous.

However, the moment you appeared at the end of the hallway, smiling your way into is heart all over again, all his insecurities, nerves and worried dissipate. This was right.

Bakugou smiles as you throw yourself in his arms, putting your legs around his body.

“Hey there hero, didn’t know I had ordered such a catch.” You play, smirking at him.

Bakugou laughs, gently placing his lips on yours, finally feeling you after a long day. “Don’t be a brat.”

“Oh please that’s why you love me.” You kiss his cheek, going to the floor. “How was your day?” You ask, as you both make your way back to the living room, where you were surrounded by, at least, half a dozen boxes, some of them were open, but still filled with things.

“A little exhausting, but you know I like it.” he responds, looking at all the mess. “How was yours?”

“Well, I officially left my old apartment.” You announce happily. “Gave the keys back to my landlord after six times going in there for boxes.” You laugh at the end, looking around you. “These are the last ones.”

Bakugou takes in the view of your things mixed with his, making his heart swell in happiness. At that moment, your smiling face was all that mattered to him.

Without giving it much thought, Bakugou gets down on one knee, taking the little black velvet box from his pocket, opening it in front of you, making you look at him and leave the moving boxes alone.

Still processing the entire moment, your eyes land on a beautiful silver ring, making you gasp, taking your hands to your mouth. “Katsuki that’s.... beautiful.” You breathe out, looking to the man in front of you, who’s beauty could surpass any ring he’d ever bought you.

“I know I’ve asked this, but I want to make it official-official.” He starts, looking you in the eyes, as if watching all of you. “I want to spend all of my life with you. You bring me hope, peace and quiet, when you’re not being a brat,” that makes you chuckle a little, and even though you want to reply to that particular comment, you let him finish, because you know this must take a tool on him to speak up his feelings like this. “-You brought me the happiest moments in life and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I want you forever.” He takes a break to breath in. “Will you marry me?”

And right there in the messiest living room, you respond to the love of your life with a promise of a lifetime. “I will, Katsuki. I want to marry you, I want to spend all of my days with you, and make memories with you. I want you forever as well.” You whisper the last part, only for him to hear, even if the only people in the room were you two. You shoot him a smile, watching as he gets up and takes the little silver metal from the box and places it on your finger.

“Looks perfect on you.” He whispers, smiling at you.

“I love you.” You lean in to kiss his lips one more time.

“I love you, you idiot.” He breathes, taking your lips in his, matching perfectly, as it always has been and as it always will be. Forever.

[wingz-of-shit]

Adorable abnormal

This one shot was inspired by this post by @free-pancakes

Summary: This is how the survey corps reacts to Hange being five after one of her experimentation went wrong :) 

2k words

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CLANK! BOOM! FIIZZZZZ

It had been precisely twenty-seconds since Levi heard the blast coming from the other side of the building. If he had no idea what had been going on before, the way in which people were going gave him enough evidence to know it was coming from the devil’s lab. What the fuck did you do again? There were at least five people that were hurrying to the lab with him, among them, Erwin. 

« What happened? » he asked the blond-haired man. He had an obvious scowl on his face, Erwin spent the entire morning dealing with taxes and expenses… nothing could make him happy, while anything would irritate him. 

« I don’t know Levi. I don’t know. » 

They reached the corridor leading to the lab, it was filled with an overwhelming smell of burn and… something Levi didn’t even want to think about such it was abhorrent. Erwin entered the lab first, he deadpanned at the scene. 

« Erwin? »

Levi peeked his head inside being careful to breathe with his mouth, whatever had Erwin so astonished had to be abnormal. Abnormal. It was the perfect word for it. Levi was staring at a cloud of dark smoke that engulfed Moblit and… and a child. 

« What the fuck? » Levi mumbled while getting closer to Hange’s right arm. Moblit was curled around the kid protectively, whatever fluid had exploded must have been toxic. 

« What happened here? » Erwin asked while pushing the rest of the curious gazes away from the door. After closing it, the Commander came to kneel in front of the kid… kids weren’t allowed here. Why would there be a kid? Levi kept wondering how the kid came to be here, deep down he had a feeling he knew exactly who that kid was. 

« Berner. What happened? » 

For a second Levi thought Moblit would faint, but he quickly composed to talk to Erwin. « Commander… I … I’m not entirely sure. But… Hange-San, she experimented, and then, BAM, and smoke, lot of smoke.. » 

« Did that exposition blow your brain too? » Erwin darted a glance at him « What? You understood something? » Erwin sat Moblit on a chair while keeping an eye on the kid. Suddenly that very kid launched herself at Levi which provoked a gasp from the people in the room.

« Levi!!!!! » 

Levi stared at the squirt that was crawling up his leg with big brown eyes. For a second he allowed his gaze to linger on the figure. It couldn’t be? But yet… the brown eyes, the wide grin, the messy hair… even the same damn glasses. Could it be she has a kid? « Levi! Levi! Hold Hange on shoulders!!» *gasp *

« Moblit would you care to explain, please! » The vein on Erwin’s temple grew larger. 

« Well… Hange-san was trying to find a formula to make titan less aggressive. It somehow made sense given the plants she put in that potion. But then she added some kind of powder… Neither Nifa nor I saw what it was but it just went … BOOM! And next thing there was a huge vapor in the room, we could barely breathe. When it dissipated a bit we saw Ha - … what we think is Hange- San sitting in her place. I mean, the potion obviously took her back to a certain age. It has to be her. »

It was her, Levi could tell. No kid had ever reeked so badly. 

There was a knock on the door. Eren peeked his head inside and with all the subtlety that distinguished him and he ran to Hange. « Captain!!!! Is that Hange San? What happened!» 

« Shut up. » Eren dropped his eyes at the sound of his frigid tone. Surprisingly, when Levi looked down, Hange was still clinging to his leg. « Levi! Shut up! » She repeated happily. He groaned but lifted the kid nevertheless. She’s cute. 

« Berner do you know how we can fix this? » Erwin asked while he took a closer at Hange’s face. Suddenly Levi saw something change in Erwin’s eyes, there had been annoyance and weariness, now there were… stars, awe? 

« Aw, she’s so cute! She hasn’t changed!! Look at these chubby cheeks! » He kneeled to level her. « Hello Hangeee, do you remember what happened to you?? » Levi felt his lunch gather in the back of his throat… he’d never seen Erwin so sickeningly sweet. 

« Erwin!!! » Hange beamed extending her tiny arms to him. He gathered her in his arms. « Erwin!! Shut up!! » Time stopped for a second, if Levi knew how to laugh he would have, instead a weird sound that reminded him of a dying titan came out of his throat. The shock on Erwin’s face would be forever carved in his memory. « Erwin big eyebrows!! » 

In a matter of seconds, Erwin had left the lab obviously vexed, Hange was standing confused in the middle of the room with Jäger and Berner holding back laughs. « Out of the mouths of babes and sucklings come grains of truth.» 

After some time Levi decided he had to go to town to gather ingredients that would bring Hange back to her normal form. Hopefully, it would take the confusion away from him. For the past hour, he’d followed Hange around the entire building, scared she’d hurt herself. He’d never cared for kids before. With a deep breath, he entered the drugstore Hange was so fond of. He gave one last thought at the 104th kids whom he had entrusted Hange with. 

* Eren and Mikasa *

« What?!! Why me? » Eren pleaded the rest of the crew when they all left running away from the room the Captain had just left. He looked back and forth between the kid and Mikasa.

« Do you honestly think that its squad leader Hange here? » Mikasa asked while sitting on the couch near the kid. 

« Well, Moblit said it was. And so did Captain. » Eren groaned and dropped heavily on the other side of the kid. « Did you ever babysit? » Mikasa shook her head. « No. Can’t be that hard, right? » Eren thought for a second. « It’s Hange-San we’re talking about here. » 

After a few minutes, Hange asked the two teenagers to play, it had to happen at some point. So they led the five-year-old to the training grounds, they’d find entertaining things here.

« Look over there, behind this wall, there are giant titans which you usually love Hange San! » Eren smiled at the sun brightening the sky - and Mikasa’s smile -  « We always go out to fight them, and you are always getting in dangerous situations but you’re very good at coming out of them safely! » He turned around to look at the five-year-old

… gone. « Hange-San? » 

« HANGE SAAAAN! MIKASA! We have to find her!! Captain will kill us! » They both began to search around, on second throughs, the training grounds had been the worst idea. There were weapons, thunder spears, 3DMG… He gaped at the park, people were flying around, cutting fake titan’s neck… 

From afar he saw a small figure getting its head cut clean by a younger recruit. Eren fell to his knees sobbing. « Mikasa… what have we done. We’re doomed. We killed Hange-San. » 

Mikasa scowled at him and hit his head. « Are you dumb? This is a fake titan marionette Eren.» 

They kept searching for the next ten minutes until they met with a soldier who said saw a small kid running toward the wall. The wall. Of course. They hurried there to find Hange digging the foot of the wall with her small hands. It shouldn’t have been shocking, yet both Eren and Mikasa stood stunned at the sight.

« I wanted to see titans. » She wailed as they carried her back to the SC building.

* Jean and Armin*

« Why us? » Did Jäger want to get on his nerves? He had other things than to care for a small kid, no matter if it was his superior or not. « We made our shift. Your turn. » 

Jean stared at the small kid climbing on Armin’s lap. The sight wasn’t surprising at all. Armin had always admired Hange-San, he treated her with so much respect it was suspicious. But there, with the roles reversed, it totally made sense. The blond grinned brightly at the small brunette who was trying to push the hair off his forehead. 

Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. 

He went to sit beside the pair and stared at the squad leader. « She’s so cute. » He said before he could hold it back. The girl shot daggers at him. « I am not cute! I am Titan!! Can we play titan? » It didn’t surprise any of them. 

They stood and went into the garden. Hange San stood on the bench as if it would make her look taller. « Armin is Levi! And Jean is the Titan! »

« Levi? » 

« Humanity’s strongest!! And you have to save me! And Jean is the bad guy! » 

The two boys exchanged a knowing look, maybe they could get information out of this tiny version of their superior… they’d always been wondering what was going on. Jean crouched in front of her. « Hange, if you answer one question I will be the best scary titan for you. » She titled her head expectantly. « Why would humanity’s strongest save you? Why not… the Commander or… Mister Berner? » 

« Because Levi will be my husband when I am tall!!! » Both boys nearly choked at the words. Had they… heard well? « Wait what? » Jean replied.

« That’s two questions. You said one. Bad titan now. » Damn, as smart as ever. 

« Hange, if I ask you one question again, I’m taking my 3DMG to be just like Captain Levi. » She nodded eagerly. 

« Does Levi want to be your husband too when you’re tall? » Hange grinned sheepishly, her cheeks reddened.

 « Yes! Short stack is Hange’s boyfriend! … Let’s play now! »

* Nanaba and Mike*

« It had to happen at some point. » Mike said as Nanaba lifted Hange on her hip. All of Jäger’s friends had kept an eye on her, they’d come to them frantically and exhausted claiming that there was no way someone could muster this much energy. Mike took a look at his supposed friend. 

« What did she even do to end up like this? » Nanaba gave the girl a glass of water.

« Don’t know… Moblit said it was a failed experiment. I hope we can get her back to her normal form. » He didn’t like the idea of people changing forms like this, it was unnatural… but then again titans existed too, so why not age-reversing potions. Mike relieved Nanaba from the weight and placed Hange on his shoulders.

« Whoaaa! I’m as high as titans! » 

He chuckled. « Last time she said this was because she smoked a blunt. » Nanaba slapped him on the shoulder.

« What? This is still Hange. I’m sure if you hand her booze now she’ll happily have it. » 

Apparently not interested in joking, Nanaba went through the books on the shelves to read a story. There were funnier things to do with a kid than read a story. « Hey, Hange, what do you want to do? » 

« Can we mess with big eyebrows? » It took Mike a second to understand she was talking of Erwin. « Did… I hear that rightly? » Apparently yes, because in a matter of seconds Hange explained a destructive plan on how they would piss the commander of the survey corps off. In any normal situation, Mike would have refused but he had a good cover… a five-year-old Hange. This could explain anything...

« So… you want to … command tons of candies with the survey corp’s funds…? » Nanaba asked again, unsure. « Yes! And then Erwin will be really angry! It’ll be fun! » 

« We sure don’t have the same perception of fun. » The blond woman looked up at him. « We can’t do that Mike. You know we can’t. » Hmpf responsibilities. 

« Okay how about instead we put mud in Levi’s room? Is that good enough for you? » The smirk that spread on Hange’s face terrified him just as much as it amused him.

*Levi *

He held the handles of the bags tighter. For some reason, Levi was frightened to go back to the SC building. He left Hange almost all afternoon with immature teenagers, this couldn’t be good. 

He pushed the door of the mess hall open, the sight that welcomed him was beyond was he had imagined. Everyone was slumped on the tables, seemingly exhausted, or almost snoring. Erwin was drowsing, his head barely supported by his hand, Mike was facing him, muttering.. curses maybe? His eyes lingered on everyone until they fell upon small Hange. She was braiding Historia’s hair with frightful focus.

« What the hell is going on here? » 

Nanaba answered him. « She… she killed us. How is she not sleeping yet? She’s a monster.» Levi approached the said monster.

« Hey there four eyes. » 

Her eyes lighted up when her eyes fell on him. She muttered his name in a whisper, holding her arms out to him. He lifted her and walked to Moblit who had… paint on his face… gross. «Here, got all you wanted for the potion. » Hange laid her head against his shoulder, he wondered then how all of them ever considered her a monster. 

« I’ll put her to sleep. » 

« Yeah yeah, we all tried, good luck. » 

"I'll scare her to sleep then." 

Levi left the mess hall to Hange’s room, it couldn’t be hard to put her to sleep, she was drowsing on hi… drooling, she was drooling on his shoulder already. He tucked her in bed with a care that surprised himself.

« Levi, stay? » she murmured when he turned the light off. « Mh, no? »

« Please? Nightmares… » 

Tch. He sighed and sat on the bed beside her, she curled up against him and fell asleep right away. We all tried they said. Morons.  

…

The first rays of light woke him up. Had he? Slept? He found himself being very warm and unusually well-rested. Hange. Right, he had to help Moblit about Hange. He inclined his head to the subject that was spreading so much warmth and nearly gasped when he saw a full-grown Hange resting her head on his shoulder. 

Her breathing was soft, her face as smooth as that five-year-old that had terrified the entire survey corps the day before. 

Glad you’re back four eyes.

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yeah so this was my very first Levihan one shot, thanks @free-pancakes for the support!