#but for the love of god stop stripping them of everything that makes them interesting

[trippingontheescalator]

I think there's too much moralizing in the HP fandom. Like, every time I see arguments between the Marauder/Snape fandoms, it boils down to morality, which is ridiculous because characters are not real people. They do not have morals, or thoughts, or actions. They're puffs of smoke that only exist inside your own brain. Imo, the worst thing a character can be is boring. Snape is many, many things, but he's not boring. Part of what makes him interesting is that he's contradictory, sometimes he does bad things with no real reason but to satisfy his own emotional stuntedness, sometimes he does good things because it's the right thing to do, and all of these actions remain in character.

James Potter is a footnote in canon. A tabula rasa. We know a handful of basic facts: he desired Lily, he bullied Snape, he saved Snape from getting eaten by a werewolf, saving Snape didn't stop him from bullying him, somehow Lily decided to date him even though he literally tried to blackmail her, his friends loved him, he was loyal to them, he was charming, he fought in a war. Everything else is fair game! Make him your own! Do something with these bare bones and create an interesting character! And yet when I see these interpretations of him that are like "Bambi did nothing wrong, Snape was actually the evil mastermind behind all of this just to make poor James look like the bad guy >:(" I just saw a take that had Snape as the mastermind of the werewolf prank that he designed to break up the group, and I'm just like, my friend, those horrible flaws make James interesting. You just turned him into a sad sack of goo. He's no longer a character who acts, he's a blank slate that things happen to. There's a difference. You somehow made a footnote even more boring. Don't be afraid to embrace the darker aspects of him just because you're afraid of a character who is not perfectly moral and good 100% of the time.

[astrolynnworld]

bondage

pairing: dom!matt x reader

summary: matt has a bondage kink that he wants to try

warnings: smut, bondage, language, oral, degradation, praise, implements of daddy, choking, one use of spit play, rough, love, lust.

pre a/n- this is gonna take me so long to write, watch

word count: 1,603

although it was a few days after christmas, matt told me that he still had a surprise gift for me.

so here i am waiting for him to bring this mysterious gift out

matt comes into the living room with a big box in his hand, and a smile plastered on his face

“oh god” i say out loud as he places the box down in front of me

“open!!” he says excitedly

I get to opening the boxes wrapped in paper.

inside the box i find multiple whips, ropes, and handcuffs

“huh? what the fuck is all this?” i asked confused and unamused

“remember when you said that if there was anything we wanted to try in bed, we can just bring it up to each other with no shame?” he states, implying something bigger

“yeahhh..” i respond

“well, this is kinda new, but I want to try.. bondage” he replies hesitantly

“bondage huh?” i repeat for clarification.

“yeah.. bondage” he says again hesitantly.

“i like the idea of you being restrained, while i am in full control of your stimulation” he continues

“oh..” i say in complete awe

“we don’t have to if you’re not into it I just thought it would be-“

“no no no i’m totally down. I just wasn’t expecting something like this from you.” i interrupt

“when would you want to try something like this?” i continue

“uhm.. i was kind of thinking right now. if you’re down with that?” he asks

“oh! okay yeah.” i reply as i stand up from the couch

i follow him to the bedroom, “this is gonna be interesting” i say with a chuckle

we get to the bedroom and matt starts unbuckling the restraints and attaching them to the bed frame

i stand by an watch the boys plan unfold right in front of him.

he gets up off the bed, “strip” he demands

“why don’t you take them off for me” i look up at him with my seductive eyes

he smiles and comes in close to kiss me

he strips me down to my underwear and bra as he continues kissing me

he sits me on the bed starts undressing himself before making his way back to me

he starts kissing up and down my body making my way to my pussy.

he takes off my underwear and starts lathing at my clit

licking up and down so slow and gently.

he takes his hand and starts using his fingers to circle my clit as he licks up and down my pussy.

“fuck matt, your tongue feels soo good. please don’t stop” i moan and buck up into him

he now takes his hand and uses the wet coat of my juices to slide into my hole

he uses his fingers to thrust in and outside of my hole while still giving me the oral stimulation on my clit

the combination was overwhelming and i continued to grind into his face until he pulled back

“do you wanna be a good girl baby?” matt asks

i nod my head

“words princess” he states

“yes. i wanna be a good girl daddy” i reply

“well good girls listen to their daddies okay? so you’re going to do everything i say correct?” he issues

“correct” i repeat

“good girl. now lay in the middle of the bed for me baby” he demands

i do as im told.

he grabs the restraints and starts tying it to each limb of mine.

first the right arm, then my right leg, moving on to my left arm and my left leg.

“there you go baby. all set!” he says as he tightens the last restraint

he crawls on top of me and and starts to tease my lips

he would kiss me once then pull his head back in order for me to fish for more

“baby pleaseee. you know i need you so bad right now” i beg

he lightly slaps my cheek then grabs my throat, “i know you do princess, which is why you’re in my full control”

he leans down to my face while still holding my throat, i can feel his breath on my lips

“so pathetic. i love it”

“stick your tongue out for me princess.” he insists

i can see the salvia leave his lips to make contact with my tongue

“swallow.” he demands

i follow as instructed

“such a good girl for me, my love” he smiles while jerking on his hard dick

he starts to climb up higher to my face, and dangling his cock in front of my face making me go cross eyed

“you look so dumb underneath me like this” he smiles

i stick out my tongue and lift my head up as far as it can go so i could reach his cock with my mouth

“aww is my little slut struggling to get my cock? does she want me to make it easier for her” he says before inching it closer

still not enough for me to reach. each time my tongue touches the tip, he pulls back a little

i throw my head down in frustration, “please matt. please don’t do this to me” i beg

“tell me what you want and i’ll give it to you” he says

i pick my head back up, “your cock matt. i want your cock in my mouth matthew. i want you to fuck my throat, please” i whine

and with a swift motion, matt grabs my head and inserts his cock in my mouth

he uses his hands to push me back and forth on his cock while he also uses his hips to thrust inside my mouth

“fuck your mouth feels so good” he groans while throwing his head back

“your throat is so tight and warm on my cock.. fuck” he continues

nothing other than the sloppy sounds of him fucking my mouth and his moans can be heard throughout the room

“oh my god you’re such a slut. i bet you like that i’m in full control of you like this right now. i bet you’re so turned on by this” he grunts out

“you like when i fuck your throat when you’re tied up under me with no control? huh?”

“i bet it feels so good to you huh? such a nasty little slut. my slut. my slutty princess who’s such a good girl for daddy.”

all as he continues to fuck my throat

“fuck i’m gonna cum-“ he slows down his pace and pulls out.

i take gasp silently trying to catch my breath and regain air

“as much as i’d love to cum in your pretty little mouth, there’s better holes to work on” matt says before slide back down to my bottom half

he starts using his cock to tease my clit and wake her up from the lack of stimulation in the past few minutes

but doesn’t take long before she’s starts leaking out wet juices again

“so fucking hot” matt exclaims before sliding into my hole

i arch my back at the feeling of his girthy long cock sling inside me

matt’s length never fails to surprise me

he starts off slow with a deep thrust that sends me into a shock every time he pushes himself in

i can feel everything in my body stop when he pushes himself in like this

i don’t even have words for him, i can’t even get to thinking right now it just feels too good.

“you look so brain dead on my cock right now. do you like it when i take care of you like this princess?” he asks

i nod my head

“words princess.”

“nugh- ye- yes matt. yo- feel so f- fucking good ri- right fuck- right now” i try to form a sentence

he bends down and starts kissing me while interlocking my restrained hands with his

“i- it’s n- not fair t- that you g- get to make me f- feel like this.” i whimper out while shutting my eyes

“look at me” he responds

i try to look at him but it’s so hard to keep my eyes open

“look at me or im going to stop”

i try my best to keep my eyes open as he fucks deep into me, picking up the pace

“i fucking love you”

“nhmmm i love you so much matt. fuck” i say trying to keep my composure

“you’re so fucking perfect and you always feel so good”

“there’s nobody better than you”

“you’re so fucking perfect and you’re fucking mine”

“my perfect girl, mine all mine.”

i feel the knot in my stomach starting to untie

“matt im gonna cum.” i say while squeezing his fingers that are still interlocked with mine

“me too baby. just cum with me.”

“cum with me like the good girl you are”

“daddy’s good girl”

i arch my back and fuck myself into his cock for the last few times as i come undone on his cock

he throws his back back as he also releases his high

he brings his head back down to kiss me as we both finish off our orgasms.

“you’re so fucking good to me. i couldn’t have found anymore more perfect than you” matt praises

i blush and smile, “i love you matt”

“i love you more y/n”

matt undoes the restraints and uses a bedside towel to clean up our messes

he tosses the towel in the hamper and proceeds to climb back in bed to cuddle me to sleep.

couldn’t have chose a better life

———————————————————————

a/n- took me an hour and a half but i really love this story so much!! hope you guys enjoy as well

@mattsneezing <3

[trashogram]

He Chose You (Pt. 12)

Lucifer/Reader: Lucifer chooses you to be the mother of his child. Rated E for Explicit.

(LISTEN… this story has gotten out of control and I need help.)

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 13.5 | Part 14 | End

“It’s alright, child.” Sera’s moods swung round like a revolving door. She could change and bend from someone motherly to a raging Force to an uninvolved observer in a millisecond. “You don’t know any better.”

She reach out and placed a hand on your cheek, perfectly warm and loving in her caress while her eyes remained like flint against the loveliest of features. “Everything has come to pass as it should. You’ll understand in time.” 

It made you sick. Your skin grew clammy as an acidic substance shot up your esophagus and your whole body pitched backward to escape.

You would’ve taken hours locked away with that asshole Adam before you stood another minute being condescended to by the Seraphim.

You were sulking, and you knew it, but you couldn’t stop. 

The building that you had been taken into to meet Sera in the first place served as some sort of Capital. It was grandiose and reached so high up that you couldn’t see where the damn ceiling ended. Perhaps it didn’t. 

You had to take great pains to escape it, navigating among high-ranking angels of all kinds filtering from both the ground and air above you in orderly chaos. It quickened your step to notice that a number of them did a double-take at seeing you. 

           They resembled different things, just as the angels outside did, although most of them appeared human-like. You wondered briefly if there was a rhyme or reason to it, or if God chose to make the woman you barely avoided running into resemble a moose because it made Him laugh. 

Once you’d escaped the war room, you had immediately breathed a little easier. Still, you continued on until you physically felt the tiny shocks and electric currents of warning ebb from your skin. It was as if Sera’s essence had stuck to you, her presence clinging to your frame to make a longer impression.

It had your skin tightening, muscles clenching as a chaotic flood of anxiety and fear prevented you from walking solidly. Too many ‘what if’s’ took you in and out of awareness, making you stumble over nothing. 

It had crossed your mind that Emily did not appear before you’d made yourself scarce. A part of you had wondered at that, feeling as though she’d have waited for you out of some concern for your wellbeing. 

Perhaps that was all for show, however. Sera was clearly excellent at appearing benevolent, and Emily had looked toward the Seraphim for guidance in front of you. It stood to reason that Emily could also be two-faced. 

The logic was sound and yet it made you wince, whether from shame at your incorrect judge or character —

‘Or how much she reminds me of Lucifer.’

You imagined Emily looking at you while stripped of any warmth and compassion. She quickly changed, morphing into Lucifer with hollow, unfeeling red eyes. 

It hurt.

—

Panic had you frozen in place a time or two before you’d gained a wide enough berth to stop. 

Beforehand you’d walked clouds so polished and flat you’d swear they were glass, amidst the more general population of Heaven with your arms wrapped around yourself. It felt needed when even those outside the Capital looked at you with interest, as if they knew. 

Maybe they did. Was it against the rules to keep secrets in Heaven? 

“We are literally judges, juries and executioners in Hell.”

“Executioners?” 

“What’re you talking about?” 

The recollection of a seemingly insignificant moment drew you to a halt. You stared at the pristine ground, fists knocking at your sides. The confusion on your face doubled when you looked up. 

Your ‘wide berth’ had led you far away from the crowds of perfectly content angels and their sleek, futuristic buildings. Farther than you’d anticipated, as ahead of you lay a line of trees that thickened into a dense forest. 

Like Earth, Heaven had a variety of terrains — or so it would seem. Child-like curiosity had you crossing the line between airy openness and into the thicket of pines. All varieties of fir, pine, and larch coexisted with one another, bowing and swaying in the wind. There was nothing to be afraid of, but a sense of oddity hung in the air as you walked a perfectly sculpted path. 

The smell of damp earth and lilies rose from the ground at your feet. A warm breeze rustled the hair that hung limply around your face. Birds sung merrily above you, flitting from branch to branch. 

It occurred to you that no matter how deep you traveled into the woods, the sunlight never waned. 

And yet faintly you heard roaring. It was distant but growing louder with every step you took. 

It was not an animal nor man calling out to you from far away. You felt the change as the smell of sap intermingled with that of salt on the wind, and the floor turned from nettles and moss to pale sand. 

You rubbed your eyes as the trees parted and seemed to disappear as they revealed a beautiful, sparkling sea. 

Sun cast off the surface of the ocean, bouncing against a kaleidoscope of multicolored clouds surrounding it. And you had Dejá vu before blinking away the flash of purple and honey in your eyes. 

You watched tiny waves as they fell against the shoreline, seafoam disappearing within moments. It continued, mesmerizing you, as you ambled toward it. When the water finally rushed over your feet, it carried tiny seashells that scuttled around you. And unlike the ocean you were familiar with, this one was a perfect temperature, no acclimation required. 

For the first time since arriving in Heaven, you felt yourself smiling genuinely. 

You gave into the urge to squish the wet sand between your toes and waded into the water up to your ankles. Your worries began to wash away with each pull of the tide, slow and steady. 

Eventually, you meandered away from that singular spot and began to trek parallel to the shore. The sun never got in your eyes nor did the sand get whipped up and blow into your mouth. Everything from the waves to the breeze was gentle. 

As were the eyes that were upon you. 

As soon as you felt that stare, you stopped in your tracks. Just the thought of turning to them was daunting. 

You don’t have to look, but you do. 

There’s a woman with you now, with hair so long and blonde it’s almost white. Her chin, lips, nose, and eyes are delicate and soft.

—

Eve had lingered upon your every step once you’d arrived in her neck of the woods. 

She was glad to see that the effects of the beach it hid were enough to soothe you, even if it was more of a distraction than a cure. You deserved something good, even if it was relatively meager compared to everything you’d endured up to this point. 

Your figure grew smaller as you crossed the sand, away from the first woman’s hiding spot. You were none the wiser, engrossed in the soothing give and take of the water. It made it easier for Eve to creep up the beach only a few paces away, free to follow your path without ruining your tranquility. 

It reminded Eve of a simpler time when she was the one being eyed curiously from afar. 

*** Tag List: @crescent-z, @for-hearthand-home, @undertale-is-sansational, @loslox, @navierkalani, @yaimlight, @ivoryviness, @crystalplays28, @flowerempress, @wally-darling-hyperfixation, @altruisticradiodemon, @moonlight-readings, @halparkebitch, @charliecharlie65, @sockgoblin, @cocomollo, @caniseethefourthsword, @squeegeeclean, @crow-twink, @an-emovision, @marydragneell, @lafy-taffy, @fandom-imagines1, @loquacious-libra, @glowymxxn, @avadakadabra93, @froggybich, @hamthepan, @ukor02, @adaizel, @boogiemansbitch, @vinillies, @lbcreations-blog, @thesoundresoundsecho, @serenity-loves-red, @alientee, @aquaamythest96, @0strawberrysorbet0, @fluffy-koalala, @washeduphazbin, @rebecca-hvnstn, @velvette3, @kermitdafroggy, @wpdarlingpan, @apatcheworkofproblems, @cherry-cola-100, @pink-apples001, @al-of-the-stars, @backinthefkingbuildingagain, @martinys-world, @alastorssimp, @wobblesthewaffle, @shikiribee, @undertale-anomaly20, @asakura-fangirl-stuff, @ringsofpersonti, @angelicwillows, @wingoodlilboymyway, @cimadreamer, @museofzealoushope, @oneiric-rotaerc, @call-me-nyxx, @darling-angel222, @elementwind91, @bloody-delusion-expert, @martinys-world, @devilslittlebabyxx

Forgive me if I forgot to tag you or the tags don’t work, I don’t know what that keeps happening.

[itsthatmff]

Hello everything is fine? If requests are still open, can I request opm Garou, Saitama and Sonic with a partner capable of healing any serious injury and renewing their vital energy?

So interesting. It was my first time writing for sonic so don’t go too harsh on me 😞. And yes everything is fine! Just school stressing me out lmao. But I hope you enjoy!

Having an S/O who can heal wounds

Gn!reader

Included: Garou, Saitama, Sonic

Requests are open !!

Garou

It was in that shack where you and your friends often came to hang out because it was an unused and empty place in the middle of the forest that you found that white haired man resting after a long and tough fight.

It couldn’t even be considered resting the way he looked. Blood dripping down his body like water. Of course you immediately tended to him without thinking twice.

You were a B-class hero. Downplayed to the support role, a mere healer. People - especially the association did not see the potential in you. It always bothered you but in this situation you were lucky. God knows what Garou would have done if he had seen your name in the Heroes lexicon instead of just skipping the Pages with the B-class ranked heroes.

One instance lead to the other and it became the norm healing him up whenever he got injured. You developed a weak spot for him. The way he sat on the dust filled couch with his legs spread and his head leaned back. Always making snarky remarks. And always being shirtless.

“It’s great I have ya. Got my own private hopsital.”

“You good? Stop starin at my abs and heal them damnit..”

And of course he has a soft spot for you. May not show it but he cares for you in his own way.

It was when he began coming over for the most useless reasons that you realized he had a crush on you.

Like for instance before or in the middle of fights he’d come looking for you asking you to renew his energy. But after a while he came over every second day with the excuse that “What if I get into a fight?? I need all my power ya know.”

Once you start dating he eventually finds out about you being a hero. Doesn’t really care about it. He is just as upset with you that no one acknowledges your true powers and asks you if you want to join him on his hero hunting but you refuse.

That does not affect your relationship though.

Will lay on you as he lets you heal him. Is real snuggly. Will also groan extra loud to get you all flustered though.

Saitama

(Does this guy even get inured???)

After some research I’ve come to the conclusion that this guy has never gotten severely injured. He does feel pain but it barely hurts.

He does get some tiny scratches from time to time though.

Those if course you heal as his partner. He insists that he doesn’t need it but secretly loves the care you provide him.

When out on Monster battles you two are the best duo to see. While he takes care of the Monsters you take care of any citizens in the area.

He admires you so much and thinks you’re like the backbone of the heroes association because in the end you’re the one who contributes to the citizens and the heroes health.

If anyone dares to say otherwise they’ll have a problem with him.

Let’s you play support in video games because you’re “made for it”

What he does love getting from you are massages though. Your massages are magical because due to your healing and energy renewing powers they make one feel refreshed.

He’ll ask for one whenever he gets the chance.

“A massage’s always good. I can seriously start to feel the back and shoulder pain at my mid-20’s.”

Sonic

At first he’s very reluctant over getting treated by you.

The chairman he works for offered him a personal assistant/nurse. Which was you of course.

This guy knows no shame. Literally strips himself naked in front of you so you could inspect “all his wounds clearly.” It takes you some bickering around for him to put his clothes back on.

Also this guy CANNOT SIT STILL FOR A SINGLE MINUTE. always has to hop on from one place to another with his super speed. It’s just more ‘comfortable’. You literally have to cuff him down sometimes for him to sit still.

And will not stop talking during the treatments. Talking about being the fastest, avenging saitama and whatsoever.

It’s like a therapy and treatment session all at once.

Once you both start dating he gets so comfortable. Will enter the room and lay on you without saying a word expecting you to treat him.

Will justify the injuries he’s gotten like it’s his job.

“Ah that one..you see there was this frick of a cyborg who did not know when to quit. He chopped my hair off too..can you believe it?!”

“See but i’m still stronger than him though. Next time I’ll bring you his head as a souvenir.”

[dawnbreakersgaze]

All's Fair in Love and Kitty Cards:

𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓑𝓲𝓰𝓰𝓮𝓻 𝓣𝓱𝓮𝔂 𝓐𝓻𝓮: 𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓗𝓪𝓻𝓭𝓮𝓻 𝓣𝓱𝓮𝔂 𝓕𝓪𝓵𝓵

❥ ┊𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲; You've decided to bring home an electronic board game of kitty cards, and make the oh so simple suggestion of playing strip kitty cards to entice your work weary boyfriend Zayne into trying it out with you. After all, you're THEE Queen of Kitty Cards herself- it's not like you could lose, right?

❥ ┊𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠; bullet fic format (sorry, don't have the energy to devote to full fic rn 😅), reader referred to as you/your and she/her, this one really got away from me omf it's longer than I mean it to be eek, not proof read, written in a whirlwind bc this idea would not leave me be until I got it out, not full smut but very suggestive, just good ol' fashioned romantic fun. Zayne thinks you're hot ♡

Yes, I will be doing Xavier and Rafayel as well

Zayne rarely got too serious with kitty cards. He'd rather watch you have fun than engage in a real competition. Your smile and serious expression were far more entertaining than any game, and the delighted light in your eyes after a victory (no matter how wide or narrow) was always his most welcome reward.

That was, until you brought home that new electronic board game version, setting it up before he'd gotten home and surprising him with it only moments after he'd taken off his shoes and coat.

At first he wasn't that interested. I mean the cats where half the fun of kitty cards lets be real, plus he was tired.

But when you suggested (with a wicked little glint in your eye that had his heart stop momentarily, mind you) that you guys play strip kitty cards, he stood there blinking in silence for a solid 15 seconds, just processing.

"How upset would you be if I won, though?" He carefully asked once he finally came out of it, that little smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. God he can be so smug sometimes.

You of course tell him that you're the literal Queen, Her Meowjesty the First, and this is your domain. You demand he put respect on that name and remember it well.

You'd come to eat those words later.

The first round you win easily. Just like every game before, it would seem the kitties favor you above all else (why wouldn't they, you were their Queen after all). He gives a soft chuckle, removing his vest and placing it over the back of his couch. "Round two, then?"

Round two seems to take a similar route. You almost feel bad for Zayne. He's always been a bit of a pushover when it comes to kitty cards, and as you fill the final cup cementing your victory 23-10, you watch as he loosens his tie tossing it aside and removing each sleeve garter, laying them on the table next to his vest chain. Zayne doesn't say anything this time, only watches you as you reshuffle the cards and get the board cleared for a new game.

Round three is where you finally start to feel him trying. It's a bit like reeling in a fish. You feel like you're making some headway and and then he'll pull out a Bye Bye on your double point kitty, or use a Purrcieve and discard your pink 6 kitty when there was an open pink cup. Nothing earth shattering- you could and did still wipe the floor with him, but the way Zayne watched you over the tops of his cards as he did so started to make you feel... vulnerable, despite all your layers.

When he finally sheds his third layer- his shirt- you realize all too late that you've fallen into the spider's web. With his broad, muscled shoulders, sharp collarbones that crowned his perfect pecs, and strong biceps corded with beautifully laced veins that traveled down his scarred forearms to his large hands that currently rested against those masterfully made lats and abs and.... oh.

Oh no.

Zayne catches you staring (how could he not, honestly. You were practically drooling), and regards you with that little quirk of his lip and raise of his brow. "Everything alright? Ready for round 4?" Worry starts to eat at you when you realize he doesn't sound at all worried. He's already shirtless only 3 layers from being completely nude, and he sounds like he's already won.

Not one to accept defeat so easily, you swallow, set your expression in determination, and deal the cards.

And yet

4 rounds later and Zayne had yet to remove another article of clothing.

Your clothes (and your dignity as The Queen) lay tossed about the room in a perfect metaphor for your current emotional state.

This man. THIS MAN. Despite all your usual tricks and banter, Zayne had refused every single one of your pleas to trade cards. No amount of begging or bargaining would be accepted tonight, and during your last attempt he'd made it very clear that should you ask again, he'd put the game away since you obviously weren't interested in actually testing your skills.

So here you sat. In your bra and panties, your metaphorical crown plucked from your head and reshaped into a dunce cone.

The kitties had forsaken you.

It had started out so well, but once that shirt came off it was suddenly so hard to focus. You'd find yourself watching as he'd roll his shoulder, gazing as his chest or ribs expanded with a particularly deep breath. Let your eyes linger on each and every scar that dappled his hands and forearms. Watch his Adam's apple bob as he'd take a particularly long drink of the water at his side.

Honestly, it seemed like the more layers you lost, the harder he was to ignore as well.

Little did you know the absolute torment this man was going through on his end.

Sure, setting the trap was easy enough. You were always so sure of your kitty card playing ability, and he so rarely put up a fight when you begged for mercy. However, turning your pleading down each time as you sat across from him in less and less clothing, looking at him with those big teary eyes was threatening to completely undo him. Listening to you whine his name and watch as your perfect lips pouted so full and glossy in the lamp light was too much, he couldn't take it.

You and your games would be the death of him, surly.

Round 6 is where his empire fell.

Your defeat was swift, of course. Zanye had struck gold with 4 Meow This in his hand, and pulled a complete shut out. It was like in the movies when the character watches in slow-mo as their impending death rushes towards them, and as you were left with no number cards to fill the last cup on your turn, you watched as Zayne placed his.

"I believe that's another win for me." His tone was proud- joyful, even. Typically one of your favorite expressions he made, if you were being honest. Something about Zayne's smug, rather cocky attitude really got you going sometimes, and sitting here for the last hour, ogling his shoulder and arms and hands and abs... well... that hadn't been helping the literal ocean between your thighs either.

Your silence (and likely the deer in the headlights expression you wore) spurred a warm chuckle from him, the sound both rich and comforting, yet still strange enough to snap you back to reality.

"I believe I've earned my next reward, correct?"

Oh... this bastard. This beautiful bastard.

Puffing your cheeks at him in a pout, you consider accusing him of cheating (partially in jest, you know he wouldn't, but also why is he SO DAMN GOOD all of a sudden??), but in the soft glow of the lights, your eyes catch his, and you see something darker. Immediately, your heart begins racing, skin prickling with the familiar feeling of anticipation in battle.

Wait, in battle?

This wasn't the first time you'd have taken your bra off in front of Zayne, so why did you feel so much like... prey in this moment? As your hand slowly reached behind you to find the clasp, it was apparent you weren't the only one feeling the weight in the air. The subtle creak of the couch let you know he'd leaned forward, eager to watch and enjoy the prize he'd rightfully won.

"What are you waiting for?" The subtle tilt and bob of his head mirrors the quick uptick at the corner of his mouth, a motion you're so familiar with by now. A playful gesture of his, reserved for those moments when he's feeling particularly teasing or goading.

It only stokes the fire in you, of course. The amber hues in his green eyes, further illuminated by the warm lamplight, bore into you despite his otherwise neutral expression.

With a flick of your wrist, the clasp is undone. You consider playing a bit, slowly sliding the straps down to tease and tempt, maybe using your arms to cover what he desired to see most. Surely he deserved a taste of his own medicine after obliterating you like this tonight, but his intensity is already near suffocating.

Instead, one at a time, you slipped your arm from each strap, and gently placed it at your side. The moment you felt the chill air hit you, it was audible that he'd noticed.

Oh sure, he tried to keep quiet. Tried to stop himself from letting out that small, strangled gasp when he watched your nipples pebble. Tried to still his thundering heart when your reactive shiver cut across you, leaving goosebumps in its wake. Tried to stop himself from whispering your name in a thick voice, telling you how beautiful you looked in the warm-glow lighting. At least he managed to temper his hand and hold it back from palming his quickly stiffening cock. Thank God for the small mercies.

His reaction was so much more than you'd been expecting. You'd been nude plenty of times before, like showering together, or that time you'd shared a hot spring once on vacation. Not to mention all the THE SEX. But this??

He had your body memorized at this point, but watching you strip layer by layer as you lost each round was really doing it for him?

The way his voice caught when he said your name, the way the muscles around his ribs stretched and relaxed as he took deep breaths to calm himself, the dilation of his pupils as his eyes trailed you from navel to nose, finally making eye contact after a lengthy pause on your lips.

Zayne might have been winning at kitty cards, but you were starting to get the feeling your luck was about to turn around.

"I forfeit." His normal, rational tone returns, albeit with great strain.

You sputter out a few expletives, dropping the stack of cards you'd started to shuffle. "What?! But we weren't- I was going to- I didn't even get to-!" Too many thoughts at once try tumbling from you, tangling on your tongue. How dare he! I mean sure you won, but a victory of forfeiture was hardly a victory worth bragging about.

Standing from the couch you watch as Zayne extends a large hand towards you, that same hungry look in his eye again that has you feeling small and vulnerable, and reminds you that you're very exposed.

"I've had my fun hunting the hunter. I think it's time I reward her for her win."

ᶜᵒᵐᵐᵉⁿᵗˢ ᵃⁿᵈ ʳᵉᵇˡᵒᵍˢ ᵃʳᵉ ᵃˡʷᵃʸˢ ᵃᵖᵖʳᵉᶜᶦᵃᵗᵉᵈᵎ ᵀʰᵃⁿᵏ ʸᵒᵘ ᶠᵒʳ ʳᵉᵃᵈᶦⁿᵍᵎ

[arachnoia]

SOL HEAR ME OUT.

READER READING SOME TYPE OF SMUT OR LIKE FIFTY SHADES OF GREY SHIT AND MIGUEL FINDS OUT AND SEES... 😳😳

oh my, anon

i’ve also never read that series but like that’s such a good ask.

tags- nsfw/ some parts gon sound off but that’s a part of the story, jealous miguel??

—

You bit your lip and kept a steady focus on your tablet, processing each and every detail of the page you were reading. You pressed your legs together as you sat on the window sill of your shared apartment with your boyfriend.

You were reading a web series recommendation from Jessica Drew, who noticed you needed to read something exciting. According to her, you looked “in need of something spicy” or whatever that meant.

Exciting was a very interesting word to describe exactly what you were reading.

I moaned as I felt his throbbing tip tease my swollen clit from my panties.

“Take it off,” he said, his beautiful green eyes piercing through me, sending me even more over the edge as he kissed my neck.

“My god…”

You had gotten invested, reading each chapter precisely to take everything in. It was a good series with a very interesting plot line.

“Ya llegue, amor.”

“Uh huh…Hi, love.”

You most have been reading immensely to not notice your boyfriend open the door. More so when Miguel walks up to you and snatches your tablet, your eyes widening in fear. As much as you tell your boyfriend everything, this new interest should be kept secret.

A secret that’s about to be found out.

“What’s this?”

“Give it back, Miguel!”

You tried to grab it from him until his arms started blocking you and he raised it up with his right arm, “What is it?”

You furrowed your eyebrows and slinged some web to get it back, “Told you to give it back, O’Hara.”

He widened his eyes at what you said, “O’Hara?”

You turned around whilst gripping the tablet hard so he wouldn’t think to use his webs too. His face hardened and his lips were slightly pouted, fueling your want to tease him, “What about it, Miguelito? Why the face?”

His expression turned into one of annoyance as he shot at your tablet, “Porqué no te callas, Y/L/N. Let me see what you’re-”

He glanced at the bright screen and stopped to see what it read, which was showcasing a descriptive smut scene in all its glory.

“Take it off, he said, his beautiful green eyes piercing through me, sending me even more over the edge as he kissed my- Baby, I didn’t know you were into that…” He looked over at you with a dark smirk, everything he said dripping with sarcasm.

He walked over, making you bump into the kitchen counter. He snaked his right arm around your waist as he lifted your chin up to look at him with his left, “Is that what you want, baby?”

You gazed up at him, standing tall at his literal 6’9 height. You just stared at his lips, how full they looks and his fangs brushing on them as he spoke. The way he spoke too just sends you over the edge, having your heart beating faster.

“Me estas escuchando?”

You just nodded in a daze and smiled stupidly, “Of course, baby. I love listening-”

“Cállate”

It took you in such a state of shock as Miguel kissed you ever so passionately, his hands roaming your body as your legs became intertwined at his waist while you sat at the counter for balance.

“So querida, I hope you listen when I tell you to strip. Right now.”

You looked away and bit your lip, taking off your top and throwing it away from your already aroused figure. It wasn’t much but Miguel already looked like he wanted to devour you. The way he looked at you, his crimson red eyes piercing through you made you want to come already. He helped you by taking off your pants, only leaving you in your light blue panties.

"Chinga..." He muttered and smiled as he rubbed on your clit, earring a few breathless moans from you.

He turned off his suit and stroked his erected dick, already showing a milky ring of precum around his swollen tip.

“Vas a ver…I’m better than whatever book you’re reading. Or should I not procede?” He didn’t even have to ask as you nodded vigorously, having a need for him to fuck you stupid.

You gasped a bit as you felt his tip entering, “Fuck…Miguel.”

You felt your eyes roll as he started to insert his entire length in you, making you grip at the marble counter as it stretched you out. You felt your mouth go slightly agape as he thrusted with such force that it left you speechless.

“I’m gonna show you..Fuck!..right now…that whatever you’re reading…”

He leaned in closer to your face, “Is nothing compared to to how I can make you feel…”

He started caressing it gently in contrast to his rough thrusts.

Same thrusts that made it hard to actually say anything but look at him and his smug face as he knows only he could make you like this.

[merakiui]

AAAAA ok so. You're one of my favorite authors here on Tumblr and slkssnlssksn I'm so nervous waaaa thanks for taking your time to brainrot with us <3 I'm in love with your writing and your delicious concepts and how you execute them oh god and when you write about stinky greasy incel Idia OK I'm gonna stop and actually order aaa

Can I please get assorted macaroons with a lacy lingerie along with a hint of sea salt caramels and a finishing touch of a pineapple parfait with Floyd and Jade, together? Something sweet and cute but with a lingering feeling of uneasiness <3 Hope it's well-ordered! Please and thank you very much!! 🥹

yandere!jade leech x (gender neutral) reader x yandere!floyd leech cw: yandere, unhealthy relationship/behaviors, drugging, implied captivity, brief mentions of implied nsfw, obsession note - thank you for checking in, dearest guest! enjoy your order! [lunar love hotel]

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ᴊᴀᴅᴇ ʟᴇᴇᴄʜ & ꜰʟᴏʏᴅ ʟᴇᴇᴄʜ

☆ Your “wedding” was unofficial, a quiet ceremony without an audience. Jade dressed you for the occasion, prettying you up as if you were a doll. You certainly felt so as you watched your reflection in the mirror, drifting in and out of a daze. Floyd poked at your shoulder to rouse you, giggling about his “sweet, sleepy Shrimpy.” When the wedding bands were slid on your ring fingers—the left for Floyd and the right for Jade—it became official. They kissed you on both cheeks and promised you a future filled with love and happiness. You couldn’t protest; there was no room for such a thing, not when Floyd’s mouth was already closing over yours.

☆ The first five days are for Floyd, and the next five will be Jade’s. They planned it together, all with your and their shared interests in mind. The first five days of your honeymoon are spent at a tropical resort. You delight in local cuisine and beautiful sights, allowing the twins to hold your hands while you walk between them. They spoil you rotten, buying all sorts of clothes and jewelry to add to your wardrobe, trinkets that catch your eye, sweets you seem to fancy. Money has never been an issue, which is why everything feels so grand and lavish. You’re taken to the beach, to a quiet, desolate strip that few tourists know of. Towels are laid out; an umbrella is propped. Floyd drags you towards the sea, eager to shed his human form and swim with you. Jade reads in the shade, occasionally glancing up from his book to watch you.

☆ As the sun shifts through the sky, you tire yourself out. Between swimming with Floyd, sunbathing alongside Jade, and indulging in a picnic with both, you’re plenty sluggish by the day’s end. They snap your picture just as you feel yourself falling, giggling to each other about how cute you look. The twins intend to capture many of your best (and possibly worst) moments during the entirety of this honeymoon. When the secret contents of your lunch catch up to you and render you sleepy, you assume it’s just the result of a long day sapping your energy. It makes you pliable, has you dragging them into bed when you’re oscillating between slumber and wakefulness. The camera shutters, capturing you curled up against Floyd in bed—perfectly, peacefully asleep.

☆ The twins take turns cooking for you. Mornings are for Floyd. He prepares all types of breakfasts, all with your favorites. You think he has too much fun in the kitchen because some meals are decorated cutely—pancakes looking like cats and bears and fruit cut into stars and hearts. Jade takes care of lunch and snacks throughout the day. They work together on dinner. It’s a guarantee that you’ll always feast on delicious meals regardless of which twin cooks. Strangely, the meals are so delicious that they leave you sleepy or, in some cases, achingly hot. The twins take good care of you whenever this happens. Maybe something just didn’t agree with your stomach… It’s nothing to worry about. They’re here for you.

☆ As the days wear on, you find yourself swamped in love. Whether you’re enjoying mornings down at the beach, exploring and shopping in town, touring popular destinations, or enjoying drinks on the balcony at sunset, the twins are always by your side. Floyd clings, his arm perpetually wrapped around your waist. Jade likes to slide his hand into yours, holding it with such a gentle fondness. He kisses your knuckles softly, eyeing the rings on your fingers with a pleased smile.

☆ Jade booked quite the quaint cabin for his half of the honeymoon. For the next five days, the three of you will see endless, sprawling pines from your spot in the mountains. He’s got a vague itinerary in mind, but it’s subject to change as you get through these five days. Surprises are more than welcome. The cabin is so cozy, equipped with all the necessities for a trip such as this one. It even has a fireplace. Jade is much too eager to gather and chop firewood even though it’s already supplied.

☆ He takes you out on hikes through the woods, pointing out flora and fauna as you encounter them. His eyes are sparkling the entire time. Floyd’s not as into it as Jade is, but he does enjoy walking alongside you and taking pictures of your most candid moments. You’ve been feeling groggy ever since breakfast, so you’re not nearly as alert as you usually are. Floyd takes this as his opportunity to snap your photo when you least expect it and to steal quick kisses. Jade thinks it’s so cute that you can hardly keep your eyes open. He promises the lot of you will turn around and head back after he gathers just a few more mushrooms for tonight’s dinner. You’re lying down for a nap by the time you make it back, the sun dipping below the horizon. You think you feel the bed depressing under Jade’s weight, his hands ghosting over your clothes to help change you into something comfortable. You let it happen.

☆ This place is oddly isolated. The locals are sweet, though. When Jade tells them you’re here on honeymoon, they all smile and tell you to have fun, to enjoy these special moments, to feel lucky that you have two husbands who adore you so very much. You thank them with a pleasant smile. Jade and Floyd keep their hands on you beneath the table during lunch. Even if you wanted to say something, you couldn’t. They make sure of that. And if you seem paranoid, they wave it off casually. Jade tells anyone who asks that you just love the variety of mushrooms here, especially the fun kinds. You’re not sure what he means until much later when you’ve digested your meal and your vision blurs. Jade’s there to steady you before you can fall over, petting your head in that affectionate way and cooing at you to calm down. It’s your honeymoon. You deserve to relax. His sharp, overly sweet smile is all you see in your dreams.

☆ Honeymoons are especially exciting because they come with amenities fitting for the occasion. A complimentary bottle of wine, luxury chocolates, condoms… Floyd tosses that last one aside. You won’t need them. If you insist on using protection for whatever reason, Jade will ease your worries with a placid smile. He’ll indulge your request. He wears one, yes, but then it’s not a guarantee that this one hasn’t been tampered with in some way. You’ll never know. Floyd’s a bit more difficult to convince. He adores cumming inside and then felching it out of your slick hole. You shiver through it all, clawing at the sheets as you melt beneath them. Your husbands pamper you excessively, so don’t think about anything and just enjoy yourself.

☆ The mountains are peaceful. Unlike the tropical paradise you previously came from, things are slower here. You enjoy watching the sunrise cut through the trees in the mornings, sitting at the window with Jade and Floyd. You sleep late into the afternoon, sandwiched between both of them. Floyd’s an early riser, so breakfast is always waiting for you when you and Jade eventually wake. It’s quiet bliss. You sit and sketch nature alongside Jade in the afternoon, who adores every little line you make with your pencil. He tells you so, leaning in to kiss the corner of your mouth when you pout and insist his is better. There’s no competition here, and even if there was he will always love yours more. When night falls Floyd prepares a campfire. You roast marshmallows for s’mores. Floyd dances around the firepit, singing gleefully and pulling you up from the log to dance alongside him. Firelight reflects off of your rings. It’s a wonderful honeymoon.

[hibiscusseaart]

ok so i have some Tobirama thoughts cuz i watch Naruto rn and over analyzing everything

but whatever i need this character study to get my characterisation of him straight.

So basically I just thinking over what an ass Tobirama is towards the Uchiha clan

and a disclaimer: i love Tobirama he's my fav, I just want to understand him better and PLEASE share your own opinions too! i feel like im making a whole paper on him or smth

Tobirama was basically "I separated Uchiha in their own compound from the main cast of the village and ordered them to make a police force (and everyone knows how people "love" cops, especially in military settlement) not because I hate them. They're just dangerous and prone to mental instability (thinking of Madara much? Dude if ppl feel love intensely, and you don't, it fucking doesn't mean they're mentally ill). But I know some good Uchiha (Kagami who was under his command?? and Itachi who massacred the whole clan for the village????) so I don't hate Uchiha."

Like okay, he doesn't hate hate them, but he IS prejudged af. As much as I like to read stories where he isn't like this and kinda more forgiving, in canon he is an ass.

And honestly it makes sense for Tobirama to be like that (I'm not defending him, I'm just trying to lay his thought process down). Like he fought with Uchiha for most of his life and he doesn't have pink glasses on his nose like Hashirama. He knows they're dangerous and he learned to mistrust them since they're enemy.

And he has his own theories about Sharingan, but basically he thinks that bitches are so sensitive, they can't handle a little hurt and loss.

I honestly think that he's wrong, like I think Sharingan awakens by high levels of stress (maybe cortisol levels shoot up suddenly?) Tobirama is only one man who tried to understand that and he barely interreacted with Uchiha personally.

Ok i just found this but bitch really came up with this theory based on rumors. Dude, please stop spreading misinformation.

Though we don't know their medical progress at this point, so maybe he really didn't know? Like he didn't have enough medical knowledge to get this theory straight. He has his special interest in making jutsu and you don't need to know people well enough. You just need to know how to kill them effectively.

Also, dude, if you (or maybe Senju in general) don't react as strong as the Uchiha, it doesn't mean they're mentally ill or cursed.

Oh and Tobirama thinks he's done GOOD for Uchiha. I mean his brother thinks it's slight for the Uchiha to get separated, living near prison and being avoided by village since they're the police force, but for Tobirama it's a job well done cuz it helped the village. He's a practical man who doesn't even think about feelings like that.

I think with Konoha he kinda played the game like SimSity but IRL. Optimised and used the resources he had to do the best working village. You don't think about sims' feelings when you make them pay higher taxes or make them live near dumpster just cuz you think it's okay and they will manage, right?

Before it was his brother to care for this kind of stuff. But then he died (how the fuck btw? I hc it was a disease but damn in some timelines he died when he was like 42 but damn WHAT could've killed The God of Shinobi) and Tobirama stayed alone. I assume his family wasn't much help and they had a 1st war near, so Tobirama had to work fast and efficient.

just a funny strip "You don't know him like I do"

I think Tobirama was also offended at Madara since he tried to destroy the village he put a lot of work into (lets be real, Tobirama doing most of administrative work is basically canon, not a headcanon, it sits way too right)

Plus I think Tobirama like many people was impressed + scared of Madara. Like he's crazy strong and ofc you're afraid, I get it. But Madara is an exception, not the rule. He's just a freak of nature + I think being Indra reincarnation had its influence too. It's not the whole Uchiha clan, but Tobirama judges them like he'd judge Madara.

Maybe he's a bit paranoid. Understandable since being a ninja and it's what keeps you alive, but this lack of trust really showed through all of the history between Tobirama and Uchiha clan.

Okay maybe hc territory, but I think Tobirama doesn't get emotions much in general. He's very autistic coded and, being on the spectrum myself, I can get where he's coming from. I trained my empathy cuz not having one is considered wrong. Tobirama probably didn't cuz no one told him to or he didn't consume this type of content in his childhood (i trained myself by cartoons lol). He cares, but he doesn't get feelings and makes these kinds of theories, based on rumors (damn dude fact check please).

Maybe since he doesn't get emotions much he's used to depend on other people in this regard? Like people start saying these rumors and he watches himself and is like "Yeah that seems possible" especially since Madara got his big drama time about Izuna. He has big feelings = has strong Sharingan. It is plausible.

I dont think Tobirama wanted to check it for sure, since 1) WHO will let the White demon near their precious eyes to help him understand how they work; 2) it's not his point of interest. he had village to run, jutsu to make, kids to teach. the bitch was busy and it's only 24 h/day

so yeah Tobirama had his reasons but he's an ass lol. like dude did start this chain of Uchiha slander and then when they were massacred he was like "Oh boohoo they self destructed what a pity" DUDE 😭

[burst-of-iridescent]

I’ve been reading a series where a guy is in a near identical situation to Katara was in The Southern Raiders. But what I find interesting is that no one really tries to stop him and the fandom considers it completely justified. I can’t help but think despite it being two different series and fandoms that Katara’s gender has at least something to do with this. When a male character wants to seek revenge and kill the murderer to do it, the narrative and fans justify it but when it’s a female character she’s vilified, seen as out of control and letting her emotions get the better of her. I hate when people say Aang was right to say what he did and try to stop Katara from making her own choice. It doesn’t help that we know Bryke is misogynistic based on well everything to do with their female characters post series after they didn’t have the talented writers who actually understood the characters helping them. And sure I know Bryke themselves didn’t write The Southern Raiders but we know from script leaks that there were more shippy Zutara moments that were cut and I think we know who’s to blame for that. So I wouldn’t be surprised if they still influenced the more problematic parts of that episode. Such as Aang and Katara never talking about or resolving their conflict, Sokka calling Aang wise beyond his years and never talking about or resolving his side if things with Katara, and even Zuko weirdly agreeing with Aang at the end that “you were right about what Katara needed.” Even though she literally just told Aang a second ago that he was wrong and she would never forgive him and doesn’t know why she couldn’t kill him. If you couldn’t tell I have rather mixed feelings about TSR episode.

Sorry for the ramble. How do you think their conversations (Katara, Aang, and Sokka) would go if they were to talk about it all after the episode?

oh misogyny definitely plays a part - just compare the way people react to inigo montoya from the princess bride vs katara in tsr - but i think the bigger issue is the overt narrative framing of the episode.

on a first watch, tsr appears to push a very simplistic idea of "violence = bad" and strongly favours aang's perspective, which encourages the viewer to see him as being in the right while katara and zuko appear to be in the wrong. the fact that aang never changes his perspective and both zuko and sokka are (forcibly and very uncharacteristically) made to take his side by the end naturally inclines the audience to do so as well.

it's only with a closer reading that you see a more nuanced take which highlights the flaws in aang's thinking and treatment of katara. katara herself makes it clear that what aang wanted her to do would not have helped her find closure, and she began her healing process without ever forgiving yon rha - which is exactly why i hate people attributing her decision not to kill yon rha to aang when she explicitly stated she did not and would not ever do what he wanted her to!

these are the same people who will also blame zuko for being a "bad influence" on katara, as if the only reason she hunted down her own mother's killer is because zuko convinced her to do it. katara isn't some weeping willow to be bent to the will of zuko and aang; her decisions are her own, not based on the whims of the boys in her life. can we please stop stripping katara of all her agency in the one episode that actually focuses on her trauma and healing?

rant aside, i do wish that katara had talked to sokka after this episode and i imagine there would be some apologising on both sides. sokka - a realistic sokka, because my god was he wildly out of character - would probably check in on her and admit that he was afraid for her safety and well-being. katara would likely apologise for the "you didn't love her the way i did!" remark and i think it would've been nice for them to finally talk about kya and for katara to bring up the conversation she overheard from the runaway about how sokka confessed to seeing her as a surrogate mother.

(imo the impact hearing that would've had on katara was largely downplayed in the show, and is likely part of the reason she reacted to sokka the way she did in the southern raiders, but that's a post for another time.)

the katara-aang conversation would probably have gone the same way that it did in canon, because the issues with their dynamic in tsr are part of the underlying problems with the kat.aang relationship in general. i would've liked to see aang have a little more of a reaction to katara saying she never forgave yon rha (he doesn't seem affected at all in the show), and for that to maybe prompt him to really reflect on what he said.

but ultimately what really has to be tackled here is aang's idealization of katara and his focus on clinging to air nomad values at the expense of those from the other nations - and those problems run too deep to be fixed in a single episode or conversation. the southern raiders would have been a good starting point, but unfortunately the finale never engages with these issues, and so what could've been a great arc ends up going nowhere at all.

[eggedbellies]

This is an idea I’ve RPd with people (and would love to again if anyone wanted to…) and i just cannot stop thinking about.

The idea of men, instead of carrying seminal fluid and sperm in their testicles, carried eggs. They’re small and unfertilized, but must be spent every month or they’ll grow larger and potentially cause complications. Public sex and public laying of these eggs has become acceptable.

You meet a guy on a dating website, purely for sex. He comes over, and soon thereafter you’re making out on the couch and he comes clean. He reveals a massive set of testicles, full of eggs, likely from 3 or 4 months of build up. He came over with the intention of filling you up with them. It’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen, and before you know it you’re being bent over your kitchen counter with his cock in your pussy.

It’s not long before he pauses, a groan on his lips as eggs start pouring out of him. You can feel them, one by one, as they stretch you passing through him. Your hand cradles your belly as it slowly grows with the eggs being placed inside. By the time he’s done (and you’ve cum a time or two) you have the belly of a 4 month pregnancy. You exchange numbers and he walks away.

About a week or two later, the eggs have grown and grown. You’re waddling around with the belly of a 10 month pregnancy with triplets. You feel the sexiest you have ever felt. But, the time has come to lay your eggs.

You go to a public park, set up underneath a tree in the back, and strip. You’re completely naked, legs spread open, and start to push. The eggs come one after one, much larger than when they went into you. By the time you’re done, you’ve laid 30 unfertilized eggs. A small crowd has gathered to watch you, some men slowly rubbing their cocks. And among the crowd is the man who put the eggs inside of you in the first place, ready to put another clutch in you right then and there.

(I held onto this one a while just to keep reading it ngl. god.)

I'd heard of men who did this. It had never held much interest to me, before; sure, I'd been tempted, now and again, in a few relationships, to take their eggs - but I was always a little shy. And I always had work, or maybe personal hangups... maybe that was why I'd never held a relationship for long. And those strange guys, the ones who liked their balls being packed and tender, who wanted to stretch people out... I'd never really understood until I met him.

And they'd looked so good on him, so heavy and full. Slapping against my clit with each thrust. The stretch, god, I'd never felt anything like it, and with the noises he and I were making, it felt like animal breeding. He must have loved it as much as me. How my shirts didn't fit quite right, forced to wear loose jumpers until I could get some maternity wear, the fascinated stares of people clearly wondering how I could possibly be so late term and yet not have them already...

I'm glad it's summer, because even my normal tops are rapidly becoming crop tops. It's hard work to heft my body about. Everything has widened to help with the weight. People come over and ask how far in I am and I try to be vague but not moan whenever they ask to rub and feel the clutch (and I can't help but say yes.)

As the last egg is popping out, and bystanders come to help scoop up the clutch, offer to call my partner, take me to the hospital, whatever I need, I shake my head. I know what I need. Call him from the crowd. There are murmurs, of course, but my body is still shaking with pleasure. We drop the clutch off. Waddle home. Pin him to the wall, all mouth and tongue, biting at skin and clutching at each other, drag him upstairs... and grasp his cock firmly.

Before clipping the cage around it.

Because these last few weeks, I realised just how good that felt. And I grin, even as his eyes widen in alarm. "How long did you wait last time?" I whisper against his neck. "Four months." he murmurs back. "I think we can wait for six." I grin, stroking his balls, before stepping back and admiring how good the cage looks on his thick cock. "Then we can see how big I can really get, hm?"

[dairy-farmer]

Saw some NICE Reverse Robins Art? And just? Eldest Blood Son Damian Wayne? All the gorgeous of BOTH his parents? A man who never felt his position threatened by these younger children? But still had that oldest sibling "they're talking my Father's love and attention AWAY from me" drama? Grew up. Lost his Tim.

Was BETRAYED by his maternal family, when they brought Tim BACK, mad from the pits, and never told him. The whole alt-timeline. Edgy Red Hood Tim. Red Bird Jason. Robin Dick.

But!

Multiverse shenanigans? Who is THIS?! It's a Cannon-adjacent Tim! He's HEROICALLY sacrificed himself by tackling the megalomaniac of the decade, into the Multiverse Destroying Portal BEFORE it could fully charge! While he, said maniac, held the control panel. Thereby shutting it down.

There had been no other way.

He had expected to be ripped to molecules.

But here he is, on the sort of Shitty Roofing that can only be Gotham infrastructure. So? No time to tremble in the face of near oblivion. Gotta beat this fuckers ass so hard his ANCESTORS rethink their life choices. Tim drags himself up. And makes Gotham proud.

Which is how Darkwing (Damian's edgy self chosen name he's now stuck with until his Father retires.) Finds him. Half dead and beating up a clear Supervillian, wearing Bat gear. Good enough for Damian. He'll get answers AFTER the scoundrel in imprisoned.

Only Tim passes the fuck out.

Wakes up, in the cave, to his own? But slightly different? Face. Two things jump out. One, that God awful skunk strip Jason was permanently stuck with after the pits (that he refuses to admit, is kinda sexy). And Two, either this Tim started Testosterone WAY earlier, somehow managed to keep to all his scheduled shots dispite Superhero Craziness, OR... this lucky bastard is Cis Gendered.

Unless maybe not?

Hey, Me, pronouns. (He/Him.) Nevermind! Bastard it is! Fuck you! Why do YOU get all the luck? I have to take shots! (I DIED.) OH, boo hoo, WE'VE ALL DIED! Ya'aint special! *Tim on Tim verbal violence intensifies*

No one can tell if... they are? Bonding? Or hate each other. Someone should stop them. Unfortunately, it has to be Bruce. Which is how they learn: No, actually, he DOESN'T know what universe he's from. It's never come up before and they don't have the technology. He expected to die.

It was a one way trip.

Now they have a New/Extra Tim. There are Tim Twins. One is An Angry Bad Boy. And the other? Strangely sexy. The competence kinks are developing by the minute.

Worse, for Damian? This Tim seems... almost? Baffled? By his politeness? Seems to expect violence and aggression? And become utterly FACINATED by him, once he realizes its not coming. Damian has never been the center of someone's attention like this. Had someone hang off his every word like this. It's breeding... Thoughts he shouldn't be having.

And RR!Tim is getting jealous. That's HIM. He should be interested in HIM. THEIR shared lives. Not Mr "ooooh look at meee, the Perfect Soooon". Other Tim should be... be like his TWIN. His BROTHER. HIS other half. His!

Bruce? Hates that he sees what could have been, in this Tim. Calm and collected. Not raging and destructive. A good Detective. A perfect Robin. Dedicated to The Mission. Not the unhealing, raging, wounded animal his son has become. He wants to protect this Tim. Hold him close. Cherish him. But he also loves HIS Tim. He feels so greedy.

And Jason? It's like the Red Bird he looked up to is BACK. Not the raging monster that swings between hating him and ignoring him. Even better! This Tim looks at HIM like he's some sort of miracle! So he plays up the spunky, the cute. Crawls into his lap and chats. Gets to hang out. Be the center of his world. He... he's in LOVE. Already formulating a long term plan. Gonna marry this Tim and have a house and kids and a dog! It'll be perfect.

Baby Dick? Robin? Was EXHAUSTED trying to hold everything together. Trying to pretend he didn't notice the tensions. Play the performance of "cute baby brother" to distract and defuse. Then this Timmy came! And FIXED everything. Took Dicks job like he'd been doing it for YEARS. Smiled so pretty and perfect. Told him he didn't have to pretend.

Like he KNEW Dick. Better then anyone else.

So maybe Dick goes... a little crazy. Follows him. Smells his stuff. Wants to crawl into his bed and DO things. But! He's not the only one! Everyone is going crazy! Timmy does that to people, he's decided. But it's okay. They're TIM'S people. So it's okay if they go crazy for him.

And really? It's just a matter of who's control breaks first. Because Tim adores them but doesn't think they'd be interested. Tim is situationally dense as bricks. They love him anyway.

-🐼🐼🐼

all of them intent on this tim not realizing the tim of their universe will never let them get dibs 😩

[sekiromi]

A Devil You Do, ch. 1

Raphael tells himself that it is only because of your importance that he tolerates your insolence, placates your tantrums, grants you courtesies never before bestowed on a mere mortal. He tells himself his interest is purely professional, his desire to be close merely an expression of wanting to protect his investment.

But then, why do you remind him so much of someone who once felt like home? Why does your soul echo with the remnants of something heavenly, and why does it entice him more than any contract ever could?

He learned not to hope anymore, but for you he might make an exception.

pairing(s): Raphael x Tav/Reader, Astarion x Tav/Reader themes: reincarnation, soul bond, past lives, lost memories, pining, slow burn cw/tw: canon-typical violence, gore word count: 1k

[read this fic in all its glory on ao3!]

Chapter One: A Hundred Lifetimes from Now

The tragedy of the divine retribution of an original sin.

Fire rained down in whistling streaks, scorching the plane and causing it to shudder.

Raphael was many things; eternal, infernal, unforgiving. Hellfire simmered in his veins, behind his eyes, beneath his skin. Cruel and calculating, wicked and sinful, a creature of an irredeemable nature. Scorned son of Mephistopheles, a young lion lying in wait to pounce on his father, tear his throat and devour his flesh to take his place.

Concerned only with control and domination, loving no being other than himself.

Despite the heat of the fight, Cania remained cold and impervious, desolate and dark.

It had been that way for a long time, almost as long as Raphael could recall. His long life stretched out behind him unwaveringly endless, shadowed by greed and lust for power.

A flicker of a dying light, the last gasping breath of something divine erupted into the blackness.

The beginning grew hazy sometime during the second millennia, but there was one thing, or one person, rather, that stubbornly clung to the very fringes of his memory, slipping into his subconscious for safekeeping somewhere around 1400 DR.

Their body lay broken, crumpled, cold. Chest stuttering, choking on the blood rising in their delicate throat, and Raphael knew terror for the first time.

It still haunted his sleep, festered in a dark corner in the back of his mind, waiting for an opportunity to remind him of all he had won and then lost in his quest for everything.

“No…” Bloodied feathers and shattered bones, he tried to hold them together, put them back into one piece as if it could save them. “Hold on, my dear.” This fear on his face, it was a new emotion to them, one that they would remember a hundred lifetimes from now if only in the deepest reaches of unconsciousness.

They made an awful sound, thick, congealed blood pooling in their mouth as they tried to speak.

“G-Go, Raphael…it’s a trap.” Skin was already turning cold, fingertips icy as they weakly brought them to his cheek. “Mephisto…he—”

“Hells with him, I’ll kill him for this. I swear.” Rage burned unrestrained behind fiery eyes they had grown to love, despite every sense telling them to do otherwise. A forbidden attraction, a dance between the infernal and the divine, a collision between the Heavens and the Hells. They had both been damned from the start. They knew this. It had not stopped them.

“You won’t. Please…go, live. We will meet again.” His rage subsided to sorrow, feeling their once immortal life drain from them faster than sand through an hourglass, faster than the Styx through Avernus. His eyes grasped theirs, searching, pleading, bargaining, but both knew it was too late. Stripped of their invulnerability by the very Gods that had gifted it to them, Death would make a move soon. There was one thing left to say, a final deal, their last promise. Gently, they guided his face closer to their own, voice diminishing as a numbness climbed into their very soul.

“In the next life.”

Raphael wept for the first and last time.

—-

Whatever souls are made of, some are awfully persistent.

When theirs had departed for a more distant realm, it was some decades before it graced the material plane again.

They kept true to their promise; Raphael did meet them in their next life, albeit in another form, another face. It did not matter to either, their essence was still there, still the same. In that second life, they had managed to hold on to their memories of the one before, remembered the centuries they had spent together. The first, which they had spent the better half trying desperately to kill one another. The second, when they started to realise why they never could succeed. And the third, where they paid the price for his arrogance and ambition, slaughtered by his own father to teach his unruly son a cruel lesson.

Whatever you earn, I will steal. Whatever you have, I can take. What is yours, is also mine.

When their mortal life ran its course, they found him again in the next. And the next, and the next. He loved them in every single one, however they appeared to him, wherever they had come from. He cherished them entirely, stood beside them as they grew old, mourned their deaths that felt like they were coming faster and faster as the years stretched on, and waited for them to knock on his door once again.

Until they started to stop remembering, until it took him searching for them to elicit any memories at all. Until only echoes of the past remained.

Every reincarnation remembered less than the last.

Sometimes, he would miss reincarnations entirely. In these lifetimes, he would wonder what had become of them, whether they taken another lover, whether any visions of him and their past entanglements haunted them in the void of the night like they did him. During these lapses, the near misses, Raphael would find himself beginning to grow hazy on the details himself. An amalgamation of lives, a collection of personalities that were so similar but also just slightly distinct from one another, made it difficult to hold on to what was original. What he was looking for.

Eventually, it had been nearly a thousand years.

A thousand years of solitude, a thousand years to forget.

Raphael’s heart hardened once again. He became the devil he knew, the creature he was born to be. Cruelness returned, contracts were formed, and souls were traded year after year.

But he did not come across theirs again. He was not sure if he would even recognise it anymore.

By the mid-1400s, any lasting hope of finding them diminished entirely. Wherever in this existence they wandered, they would simply pass as hollow ships in the night, each unaware of the other.

Raphael accepted this, and got on with his work.

[chapter 2]

[save-the-villainous-cat]

flirty hero who is also touchy until he finds out which villain is asexual.

“God, what I would give to see you all sprawled out under me.”

The villain’s patience was unco less than little today. They didn’t even know why they were so unhinged, why this outraging feeling was taking over their mind. They felt like they were going insane. It was one of those days.

Those days where they felt mad. Where they wanted to be a lunatic. Let their body take over and let go of every last grasp they had on their self-control. A Bacchus.

They knew what it meant. It meant freedom. It meant power. They wanted all of that.

And sometimes they just wanted to be understood. Truly. Deeply.

“I suppose you’d give a lot. Considering that you’ve been saying this for months now.”

“It’s trueee…” the hero cooed. He looked at them with raised eyebrows, basically stripping the villain naked with his eyes.

And the villain was just tired. So tired of it.

Truth be told, they were interested in the hero. They definitely felt something for him. But it wasn’t lust. They didn’t even know if it was something closer to love or hate. Hell, they didn’t even know if they were capable of such feelings for someone. But there was some kind of intimacy they had with him that was inexplicable. Just not the kind he wanted.

“I’m not going to sleep with you.”

“Then why did you invite me to your home? All alone?”

“I kidnapped you. That’s not comparable,” the villain said.

Before the villain could even say their reasoning, the hero’s hand was on their thigh, squeezing softly.

“Oh, come on. Maybe that’s your kink, hm?” Everything came to a sudden stop and the villain considered hurting the hero.

But they didn’t. Their rage was gigantic but their humanity was still outweighing that. They didn’t know for how long, though.

They didn’t want this. They didn’t want to feel like this all the time. The hurt and the anger. All of it sickened them to the bone, spoiled every inch of their body. They wanted to be accepted, loved even but they couldn’t figure out how that was possible when everyone wanted a bit more than that. The villain couldn’t give more. They just couldn’t.

“Don’t touch me,” the villain said.

“Aw, are you—”

“Do not.” Something made the hero take a step back and fall back into his chair. The villain didn’t know if it was their stare or their tone.

“Woah, sorry. What is going on?” The villain looked daggers at their nemesis. Why him? What was this feeling? How were they connected?

That was the part where the villain wanted to curse and cry and rage. They were torn between those feelings. Something connected them to their enemy but they didn’t know how and what it was. It would’ve been easy to kill the hero now. To get rid of him and stop this torment.

But something — possibly their humanity again —in them held them back anew. All that anger they felt and the fucking grief and the sadness, everything that was scavenging on them alive, making them scream at night, everything numbed.

“Is it that hard to understand?” they whispered. “Is it that…unnatural?”

“Wait, what are we talking about…?” he asked. He looked more than confused. He looked concerned.

“I’m asexual. I don’t like touch. I don’t want that. I don’t want you. Please, stop making advances, stop looking at me like that, stop — for god’s sake — please stop touching me.” The hero blinked.

He waited. And it clicked.

“Oh god, I’m sorry.” He looked genuinely remorseful. “I should’ve known, you never reacted. Fuck, I’m sorry I thought you were toying with me or something.”

The villain’s mind had gone quiet. They were exhausted. 

What was this feeling? What was the hero to them?

“I understand what that means,” the hero said. “I’m sorry I didn’t realise it sooner. I didn’t even ask…so stupid.”

His enemy didn’t answer. There was nothing to say. And then, after a long while, the hero spoke again.

“It’s not a secret that I’m attracted to you.” The villain didn’t want to hear it.

But they didn’t say anything.

“But there’s something else. I don’t know what it is but something about you draws me to you,” the hero said. He paused for a moment before he continued. “I understand if you don’t want me sexually. And I understand if you don’t want me romantically. I understand if that means that we have to part ways. But I want you to know that someone feels something for you.”

The villain looked at him, listening.

“And it’s not hate. Or disgust. It isn’t even particularly lust. Whatever it is, I need you to be happy. I need you to be at peace with yourself and the world. I need you to live a long fulfilling life. And I am willing to never see you again if it means you can have that. I’m truly sorry I said these things and I’m sorry I touched you. I won’t do it again, I promise.”

Once again, the villain didn’t know what they were feeling.

[guiltswept]

WE'RE  MAKING  OUT  INSIDE  CRASHED  CARS  /  WE'RE  SLEEPING  THROUGH  ALL  OUR  MEMORIES  /  I  USED  TO  WASTE  MY  TIME  DREAMING  OF  BEING  ALIVE  /  (  NOW  I  ONLY  WASTE  IT  DREAMING  OF  YOU  )  —  MEET  BABE  MORI.

...content warnings for... parental & familial death, mentions of a car accident, night terrors, stalking, harassment, implied gun violence, and drugs.

profile.

full name — paloma mori.

nickname(s) — babe! that chick over there. friend :)

place of birth — blue harbor, illinois.

date of birth & age — august 13th, 1997. twenty7.

gender / pronouns — demi woman, she / they.

sexuality — bisexual.

occupation — stripper at tba. amateur taxidermist. scene queen. professional raver. PLUR princess.

astrology — leo sun, leo moon, leo rising.

residence — her family's apartment above their beer & noodle shop in cardinal hill. the apartment is a mix of fratboyisms ( liquor bottles as decor, beer boxes as wallpaper, led strip lights half - falling off the walls ) and babe's... everything ( random crystals and band posters, cheetah print, loose plastic beads in every corner because none of them vacuum enough... so many taxidermy projects ).

interests — stick and poke tattoos; giving and receiving. edm. "scenecore". bright, neon colors. never washing her eyeliner off. pop punk. whiny vocals. nostalgic cartoons. fun and silly taxidermy. cooking for her friends; cooking as a release. dancing, in all forms. candy. glittery stickers. cheetah print. sex and love, and sex without love. skateboarding. reacting impulsively. demonias. fishnets. graffiti and vandalism. adrenaline rushes and cheap thrills. doing what she's told not to do. living her best life even if it's doomed. beer. her grandfather's recipes. mdma. loud, crunchy, static.

aversions — admitting that she has a god complex. taking responsibility for her actions. the way she can't stop when she cries. being dismissed. not being adored and loved. being alone for too long; long periods of silence. people who take themselves too seriously. being shamed. taking her medication. sleeping; her night terrors. thunderstorms, though she says she loves them. muted colors. art museums. bras. when she's not the one to end the relationship. being confronted with the truth, or reality.

quirks — falls in love and/or lust too easily, and will spend weeks fantasizing and obsessing over one person at a time. never lasts long in relationships except for one that's constantly on the frays. has no volume control in public and speaks without thinking. can be insensitive at times. loves convincing others to get matching tattoos with her. kicks in her sleep ( when it occurs ). always says she can handle her liquor but is always the first one drunk. is minorly allergic to alcohol but it will not stop her.

most played — IN MY MOUTH by black dresses.

notable features — straight black bangs and even straighter hair that's always tangled in the wind. a collection of glitter that never leaves her face. a few lovingly placed beauty marks and a full bottom lip that's always bitten raw.

general disposition — electric, energetic; a nonstop force until she's simply not.

character study — ilana wexler ( broad city ) & juliet starling ( lollipop chainsaw ).

background.

parental death / car accident; she's raised by her maternal grandfather and uncle, smack dab between her two brothers - their parents died in a car crash when her younger brother was just a baby, babe still too young to remember them much, or the accident that took place.

they live in a small apartment atop their grandfather's restaurant - a small noodle & beer shop that welds just enough profit for them to get by.

has been called babe her entire life - sometimes her grandfather says its because after her older brother had watched the movie of the same name, he thought she looked so pink and pig - like.

night terrors; is diagnosed with night terrors at a very young age - her cries and screams wake their household nightly, tiny limbs thrashing about like undergoing an exorcism. every night, on repeat - again and again. sleep paralysis becomes common - strange figures always lurking in her doorway, fingers curling over her doorframe - insomnia after that, because babe can no longer stand to sleep.

as a kid there's only so many explanations to her diagnosis - none feel right, a girl always in denial - settles on the belief that maybe she's a medium. that maybe what she sees are just spirits reaching out for her - wanting her help. she's so young, her family just thinks she'll grow out of the belief - but she never does. it's better than acknowledging the truth - of the deaths she's tethered to.

grows up the weird girl - the girl who talks to nothing, the girl who says she's really seen bloody mary in the mirror - the girl who's always bruised from taking a fall from her skateboard, over and over again - the girl who never learns. the girl who set the robotics club room on fire, and was banned from competitions from there on. always plenty smart - but terrible at utilizing it.

death; her grandfather dies shortly after babe's high school graduation - and college seems like a distant memory. she'd been serious about it, once - but now she needs to help out where she can. her uncle's taking over the restaurant with her oldest brother in tow - her youngest already picking up jobs when he should be studying. babe hates to see them struggle - hates how palpable the grief is in the air, how thick it is - how she can barely breathe.

she gets a job at the strip club as a dancer - she's young and charismatic, muscle built from years of roughhousing - it reels in plenty money, enough to help out her household and have some leftover. she picks up taxidermy classes, because college still seems so far away - babe knows how to move forward, but not how to pick up the pieces and continue where she's left off - dozens of projects left half - finished, plenty of relationships dropped without warning. the only constants are her best friend since diapers, practically, and the boyfriend she breaks up with, but never truly leaves. she's known him for so long - it feels impossible to ever really part.

stalking / harassment / gun violence; years later - babe's a known face at the club with a plethora of regulars, customers who adore not just her body, but her personality, who respect her - who pay her plenty. a new customer begins to get a bit too - affectionate towards babe. too close, too interested. the club's good about discomfort - and he's escorted off premises after he tries to follow her into the dressing rooms. it doesn't end after that - an obsession that carries outside of the club, that follows her - he follows her, to and 'fro - the police useless, because he hasn't touched her - and when her oldest brother finds out, he decides to take matters into his own hands. the man doesn't die - but he comes close to it, and when the police come knocking this time 'round - it's babe's uncle who steps up; who confesses to the crime. a crime he hasn't committed - but will protect his family from.

it's been a year since then; her oldest brother's taken over their family's restaurant - and the guilt swallows babe daily. she's only semi - recently gone back to work, much to the protest of her brothers; her oldest brother still upset about her decision, and still not talking to her.

facts & temperaments.

has unironically called herself an empath and in her defense she sort of is. feels emotions so so deeply that they hurt. a big crier, can't help it. tends to let them get the best of her - an irrational thinker who always jumps to conclusions, whether it's about you loving or hating her.

a little performative, dramatic - feels like she needs to be, like if she's not a caricature of sunshine then she's just the girl with a should - be - dead stalker and an incarcerated uncle. the girl with the dead animals, and the profuse swearing of mediumship.

a big - time partier, a known raver; self - proclaimed scene queen. always wearing rave attire, even in the cold - loves big, bold colors, the more neon the better, her arms consistently covered in kandi that she gives out like candy to her most favorite people of the week, sometimes the hour.

drugs; big big big on psychedelics and like. party drugs. loves poppers. will never admit that she has a problem - thinks she can always just reel it in.

has probably said rawr :3 in the past 24 hours.

loud and bold and talkative - isn't afraid to point out things that others may not; doesn't get the hint when to shut up. a bit of a blabbermouth, but she can't help it.

needs to be validated often that she's still liked and loved and adored, it's a bit of a problem. tends to latch onto others and form the occasional obsessive attachment. it's no big deal. sometimes it lasts for days, sometimes months. she finds most people interesting, and sometimes the most random things draw her in. thinks there's more beneath every person and she wants to know Every Layer.

a little hypersexual - a coping mechanism to deal with. Everything. but also just loves love! will also get incredibly jealous at times, but it's almost as a joke? but only babe finds it funny, and only after everyone's like babe wtf? then she's like omg jk haha im not that possessive :3 (kind of is)

once again, a big crier - at minor inconveniences, at sad movies, at misunderstandings; even when angry, it's just more tears. purposefully wears mascara that runs for the aesthetic. has probably never taken her eyeliner off.

big on adrenaline - seeking and cheap thrills. loves the idea of overcoming danger. believes in ghosts and cryptids and probably wants to fuck mothman, experiences medium revelations like several times a day.

has several tattoos that are just the @'s of people she's fucked whether it's their instagram or twitch or what. she thinks it's funny. and it's like, girl? kind of matches how her shitty little honda civic that's always falling apart is covered in bumper stickers on the outside and like. actual stickers on the inside. like she's just vomited lisa frank.

downs several monsters or various other energy drinks a day. aforementioned car's floor is littered with the crushed cans and general. gross shit ngl. we love her though.<3

[violetgarlends]

FENG XIN FOR CHARACTER ASK

(also sent by @chewiiez)

FENG XIN MY BELOVED

favourite thing about them: did i drastically overestimate how easy it would be to choose? yes. absolutely. but, his overwhelming loyalty was to what made me love him originally, so how could I say anything else. arm scene you will always be famous

least favourite thing about them: this one is a really difficult choice, because I like everything about him in the way it all makes him an interesting character. even when he sucks i still love him

favourite quote: I have no good reason for picking a random throwaway line from book 4 as my favourite. unfortunately it has not left my brain since i read it

wonder archer…he’s so silly

brOTP: god he needs some friends. Platonic Xianle trio is one of my favourites. but since that’s also one of my ships for him, I’ve always thought that he and Yushi Huang could be good friends. getting to leave heaven and do some farm work could fix him. y’know. if he was less scared of women.

OTP: fengqing <3 they are making out forever in my mind

nOTP: another tough choice. i like so many feng xin ships in different contexts. is it cheating if i say fengqing but he’s been stripped down to have none of his character traits and is just a guy with a big dick who can fuck mu qing. if it is. uh. i would never read feng xin/ban yue but I don’t think that’s a ship that anyone has ever written

random headcanon: having canonically gotten a woman pregnant will not stop me from headcanoning him as transmasc

unpopular opinion: i have said this so many times but i will continue saying it forever. he is not a noble. if i see another person say he is im going to explode. i dont know where this came from. I dont know why this exists. i could write a 20 page paper with academic citations on why he isn’t

song i associate with them:

book 4 fengqing. to me.

favourite picture of them:

teehee <3 <3 <3

Thanks for the ask!

[turntabless]

🔮 la folie - the stranglers 🔮

welcome back to turntable takes, folks!!! hope everyone’s doing wonderfully <3 this week (said so very loosely. i underestimated how hard it would be to do them every week but that’s on ME!) we have a gem <3 i know 2 songs off of it and they constantly occupy my mind! so! if you’re checking this out, thank you!! and hope you enjoy <3 once again i am very musically illiterate and don’t know theory!! this is me going AWOOGA!!!

also i’m not including the bonus tracks off the reissue because i’m TIRED. SLEEPY EVEN. but they’re also really good!

genres: new wave, punk rock, baroque pop

non stop

okay immediately loving the lil tippy tappy drums with a little echo that fade in! cute lil organ lick that is so fun!! i’m also a big fan of talk-singing when done in a sexy way and this is that! GUITAR crunchy echoing bass coming in. OH those drums fuck. this is just so fun!!! very sarcastic singing its scratching my brain!! and the guitars are so cheeky. layered vocals crescendo in volume cute like harmonies??? ooooo stripping it back then speeding up going louder again is such a choice i love it here. CHANGING TEMPO let’s go!!!

everybody loves you when you’re dead

ohhhhhh god i love the keys intro here. bass is sexy and so clear and i’m in love. the odd pitches with the guitar is so nice ! yummy drums!!! synthy business! punky talk vocals with layering going on is so good and these lyrics kinda make me feel insane. god that keyboard part and odd wavering synth in the background is so nice. harsh cymbal type sounds YUM! PICK IT UP LETS GOOOO cute lil tempo change and then right back to it!! ohhhhh slow little breakdown descending in pitch

tramp

OHHHH. flat guitar really interesting here. WITH BUZZING KEYBOARD AND BASS ????? drums are really!!! OOOOOH an instrumental soundscape baby!!! i love these vocals he’s got a great voice very punky and when he pitches up it’s really pretty??? also love the return to the darker sounds during the chorus? BASSSSSSS AH GOD !!!!! love the speed and the experimental nature of the chorus !!! 80s video game synth yummy. there’s something so dancy about this and god the vibrato and INSANELY nice drums????

let me introduce you to the family

OH FAST DRUMS LETS GO!!! ooooo this bass? is it bass? descending thing is so intriguing! faaaast guitar playing a really fun ear catching riff that’s like. this really is so experimental here. okay there’s some freddie m rasp at some parts which are really interesting and then the harmonies and layering of the vocals in the chorus are crazy! that bass is so consistent and so clear and great!!! ohhhh switch up that RIFF babes!!! it’s all very like buzzy fuzzy yum! ohhh TURN up the volume on the vocals add another lil keyboard thing this is sooooooo intricate!! ECHO on the voice for the fade-out ending with a drum beat to end everything!

ain’t nothin’ to it

ohhhhh that guitar is yummy. drums go hard in this beginning. BASS I HEAR YOU BABY YOU SHINE!! these vocals are so fun and sassy!! oh that odd lil dissonance in parts of this song is so cool??? and the lil changes in riffs and pitches sound really cool <3 ohhhhh BREAKDOWN lets gooooooo!!!! fuck it up instrumental section!!! BASS AND DRUMS ONLY OH LETS GO!!! this is really cool i’m obsessed. ohhhhh????? ohhhhhhhhhhhhh guitar little staccato notes??? this repeating instrumental part is so intriguing colour feel taste wise??? it’s so dark and a little unsettling with the occasional flatness but it’s nice????

the man they love to hate

BUZZY KEYS LETS GO !!! god. goddddd. that bass goes so hard. ohhhh crunchy soar on that guitar is so nice. drums going HARD. echoing lil keys are fun!! talk vocals as always are so fun !!! PITCH UP LETS GO !!! uplift meeee !!! back to the really punchy instrumentals on top of those buzzy keys that add such an interesting texture!! some little sweeping synthy kind of cymbal effect? ohhhhh. this is so fun !!! also the little whispered backing vox are fuuuuucking scrumptious! oh jesus it’s getting darker babes…… in tone in lyrics and then right back to light???? what in the world how is this this way. GUITAR FUCK IT UP cute lil solo! ohhhhh PLAYING WITH SHADE AGAIN THIS IS SO…… those lowest instrumental notes are so deep and fat and intriguing.

pin up

fucking insane drums i love you. ohhh??? xylophone-esque twinkly keys? GUITAR THERE YOU ARE BABY! sounds crunchy and thin but in such an atmospheric way! the “oooohhh”s are really nice with the bit of reverb on it??? this is such a fun little song? those twinkly xylophone sounds are back i love!!! the instruments are so so good at melding together so that those lil keys are picked out of the fold so well???

it only takes two to tango

ohhhhhhhh this is such a fun little intro… i don’t know what the name of this stylistic choice is but it’s like someone swinging you around with the drums bass guitar and then you get layered talk vocals with a BEAUTIFUL ascending like… quartet harmony going on. this is so fun!!! warbling keys again they’re so good at atmospheric sounds here. also sorry those harmonies are needed inside my bloodstream stat! OH KEY CHANGE! uh ohhhhh bestie the dissonance is back in the vocals but not in the instrumental i kinda love the effect??? faaaaaaat guitar just swingin around <3 OH the warbling is so interesting looking slightly more haunting as it progresses! LITTLE DRUMMER BOY GOING OFF WITH A FUN LIL HIGHER PLUCKED GUITAR RIFF? this is so….

golden brown

THIS IS MY BABY ONE OF MY FAVOURITE SONGS !!!!!! HARPSICHORD WHAT THE FUCK!!!! also with a bassy keyboard behind it! god his vocals in this are so buttery so yummy with just a hint of nasality? also god this fuckin time signature is all fucked the harpsichord is playing in a completely different time. bass and drums come into the fold so carefully subtly it’s beautiful. everything is just a little heavier but it’s still so light and mysterious and plain cool??? guitarrrrrrrrrrrr oh the reverby echo???? this solo always gets me !!!! ohhhhhh vocalisation that’s so echoey and sooooooo otherworldly is insane. the deepness and the layering of it is Fucked. this is truly such a soundscape AGAIN! chu bee fair idk how they’re so in sync when the times are so different.

how to find love and happiness in the present day

ohhhhhh this is different. screechy little synthy things going on to more spoken vocals with an insane lil bass trying going on? so sectioned with the vocals and instruments it’s really cool!!! the layering of the guitar pitches are so nice. AH TWANGY GUITAR mixed with some bongo vibes!!!! nah this is so fun!!! ohhhh these lil drum things sound like trickling raindrops. not sure what exactly they are but it adds such a cool effect. god that high frequency synth solo what the fuck !!!!! so insane so sick!!! ohhhh it fluctuates so nicely and smoothly between notes. descending vocal line with fuzz and partially covered by the instrumentals TO A FADEOUT

la folie

Oh This Is Grand. this intro is so beautiful???? what sounds like strings (made with keyboard) with a high smooth guitar part with echoey reverb and bass. OH ITS A SPOKEN PART IN FRENCH. beautiful. these words are so lonely and beautiful too and that’s conveyed so well with the effects placed on the voice itself? drums………. god this is so twin peaks right now !!!! DEEP SUNG VOCALS WHISPERING. back to spoken word with the bass getting a deeper sweeping moment??? oh beautiful deep staccato notes. there’s such a cool effect put on his voice this is….. really cool. the stringy synths really paint the background of this with colour. OHHHH high synthy parts joining the mix in a fun little flourish!!!! that bass…….. is so genuinely yummy holy goooood. spoken word so cinematic and lovely. the “la folie” being sung so deeply and whispery is so nice and comforting….. i love this. beauty guitar part at the end so soft so nice so echoey. drums holding down the fort so well UGH.

thoughts: okay. okay. i was genuinely surprised at how varied and genuinely INTERESTING this album was? like the tempo variations the key changes the instruments used the shifting parts the vocals and the USE of all of it to set tone? the tone itself was also so insane and has to be mentioned because there was so much interplay with shadow and light in each song?????????? incredible. i know talk-singing isn’t for everyone but i think it’s cinematic and cheeky and fun so i loved it. l o v e d. genuinely surprised at this guys!!!