#but for now they'll stay where they are

[endlesscacophony]

it would seem it’s been awhile since I’ve been actually active on here. I’m hoping to turn that around but in order to do that I need to know if anyone who had threads / sent asks to me previously, would you like to continue those? 

Or would it be easier for everyone if I erased everything and moved on?

[sergle]

yall are about to piss me off by not having any PASSING basic knowledge of the way the u.s. military manipulates its recruits into joining by typing up one of your uninformed, unresearched, unempathetic, individualistic, unbelievably annoying posts about how 100% of the people in the military ended up there because they just Love America So Damn Much! they're extremely mature and informed at time of recruitment, they can totally leave anytime they want, they totally had tons of other avenues in life they could've taken, there was no rush at all to get income as fast as possible, and everyone in the military also totally is part of the combat divisions and personally enjoys being IN the military very much, big believers of violence. everyone in the military is shooting guns all day, that's how that works. they LOVE BLOODSHED. also I love the "amewicans haha" twang to this type of shit because you're actually TOTALLY stealing our Thing, which is turning systemic issues into Individual Issues. Instead of talking about the powers that be, it's so Personal Choice up in here. It's, "well you shouldn't have done it then. I totally wouldn't because I know better." you don't wanna talk about the military industrial complex as a whole, and you don't want to talk about recruiters, you just want to pin the blame on Specific Individual People one-by-one, as if they're responsible for the system that they're being ground up in. someone was in the military? bad person, no matter what. it's easier to believe that, I guess, than to acknowledge that Normal People (with high school educations) are manipulated and incentivized into joining a system that is Bad. at like age 18. but yeah no that 18 year old should have just been smarter lol haha anyway here are some screenshots for no particular reason

side note this reply of someone going "umm just get loans and go into a high paying field it's easy XD" as a direct response to someone trying to explain how most americans joining the military are being funneled in that direction out of a need for money.

and another person who Decided that americans join the military just CLENCHING their teeth thinking of other people, and not thinking completely selfishly about their own selves and their own income/housing/healthcare.

[strawberrycamel]

ninjago seabound hurts. so much. what the fuck

[mysecretdsmpblog]

foolish saying he genuinely trusts bad especially after the election announcement is like. oh

like i knew it a little. i knew they bantered but bad still came to help him when he thought he was dying in that hole. bad still takes care of the eggs, bad shows up, etc.

but leo and foolish are literally talking about how good of a person bad is and like. yeah. yeah even though foolish is all 'oh i hate bad he's terrible and a menace' it's clear he really does trust bad. and he's not the only one

it's easy to forget just how many people trust bad implicitly on the qsmp, especially with all the shenanigans he gets up to. but like. oh

[coquelicoq]

.

[deva-arts]

Sketching out extremely lighthearted character concepts yee hoo

[journey-to-the-attic]

I've just discovered the pet zoo au and I.am.obsessed.

NO CUZ LIKE IMAGINE IK AND BELPHIE LISTENING TO "WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY" AND BELPHIE JUST STARTES MAKING FOX NOISES ON THAT PART.

Also for some reason I think beels "woof" would be like that one meme with the husky where the humans are trying to sush it and he just lets out the most definde 'woof' ever.

Another thing,what if they tried to write out their names??? Like Satan steps in int and tries to make multuple paw prints on a paper to draw out his name in a way (he fails)

Also, it's said that crows can learn some words...what if crow Mammon (due to being magic as well) manages to start saying a few words and even starts making full on sentences. Can just imagine him flying through the window and landing in front of Ik and her dad like "feed me mortals or perish" as a joke to freak them out BC 'omg a talking crow' AND THEY INSTEAD START SCREAMING THWIR BUTTS OFF WHILE MAMMON IS TRYING TO CALM THEM DOWN BUT IT ONLY TURNS WORSE.

On the talking crow Mammon topic,what if he tells Ik what the others want to tell her?? Like "Yeah Lucifer wants you to put more Britney Spears" or "Levi wants to watch you play this game" or "Asmo says you gotta go pet him"

(wanna hear more from you tho BC I like your hcs, they're funny and silly)

orders given, orders received (/j i've been wanting to talk more about this au too!!)

i love the idea of the brothers attempting to communicate their names,, i feel like lucifer and/or satan would come up with some really smart method of going about it (like laying out books or ripping up a newspaper and using the letters), but ik and her dad are just like 'ah, what silly animal antics' and clean up the mess without even noticing what they're trying to spell out

so at first they just all have nicknames-

lucifer: peter (as in Peter the Peacock)

mammon: car (crow goes "caw!", caw sounds like 'car', ergo, car)

levi: socks (on the first morning after they took the animals in, ik found him trying to hide inside one. it's also funny because usually you get cats or dogs named this)

satan: paddy (aunt lisa picked this one - as in st paddy, for his green eyes)

asmo: duchess (ik had a feeling he'd like it)

beel: boof (it's the noise he makes)

belphie: hu (from the chinese word for fox (zhao picked this one). sometimes it's extended to hu-hu)

at first, satan and asmo are the only ones who like their new nicknames, while everyone else is mostly neutral on theirs, apart from lucifer, who HATES his

however, he still responds to it, so really it's his fault that it sticks

eventually everyone warms up to their new nicknames, but they'd still like their new family to know their actual ones

i like the idea of mammon learning speech, so yes he'd be the one to eventually relay the message!

he hops around on ik's shoulder going "lucifer! lucifer! lucifer!", and ik thinks her crow friend is conducting a ritual up until she realises he keeps pointing his beak at peter the peacock

she does switch to their actual names once she learns them, but in her head she still tends to refer to them by their nicknames, and they still respond when she uses them aloud

mammon's language would be more fluent than a regular crow's, but i don't think he'd generally be able to string together full sentences

so it's more like a "hey! food!" when he's hungry, "kid? okay?" when he's concerned, "levi. bowl. broke!" when he's snitching

he can manage full sentences if he tries really hard, but he usually can't be bothered, so he saves them for when he's serious

for example, if ik were getting bullied, he would go full fluency mode to say "i'm gonna kill them for you"

the other brothers are mostly happy to just chill (particularly levi and belphie), but lucifer gets so restless with no work to do that he starts assigning himself random chores to occupy himself

for example he's decided it's his job to open all the curtains in the morning and close them at night

ik starts bringing home random worksheets from school and lucifer will just sit there staring at them (he doesn't have hands to write with so he just has to answer mentally)

levi has a little box by the window from which he can see the tv and also sunbathe

ik brings home a sheet of stickers so that he can pick some to decorate with

beel is SUCH a big dog that he would take up the whooole sofa or bed if he sat there, so usually he very politely sticks to the floor

but then they buy him a big blanket and he starts carrying it with him from room to room to rest on (belphie also steals it a lot)

everyone has their own little spots around the house where they usually stay, apart from mammon, who is nearly always found on ik's shoulder

if ik isn't home he will stand on zhao's head instead

satan nearly always sleeps on either ik or zhao's bed and at some point his habit extends to the others, so they start taking it in turns being 'guards' for both humans at night

lucifer pretends to be above it as if he DOESN'T trot himself right to rooms and stay there the whole night as soon as it's his turn

whenever ik's stressed out from school she comes home and just plonks herself on beel

he's such a big dog that he barely even feels it so he's perfectly happy to be a big fluffy pillow

levi spends most of his time in his box but he'll also be quite happy to go around the house draped around ik's neck and listening to her narrate her whole day to him

sometimes ik brings asmo ribbons and such and he gets so excited that he does that jumpy twisty thing rabbits do (i think it's called binkying?)

asmo and satan both get the zoomies but satan's always so embarrassed about it afterwards, while asmo simply owns the energy and then flops over for pats afterwards

belphie's normally very quiet and docile but occasionally he'll just SCREAM and it scares everyone in the house

[greenlaut]

old ocs 👍 (late night ramblings in the tags)

[willowser]

willow everyone around me has a partner/fwb (we're in our 20s) and i'm still a virgin i feel so excluded 😔!! i want to have sex too i'm just scared and feel soooooo left behind. childish almost because i am an adult woman with a job and license and can legally drink and rent a car! grrrrr! and i know in my heart that it's silly to feel this way but i can't help it sometimes

oh my dear !!! 🥺 i think when we're surrounded by people that are involved in something that we're not apart of, it's very normal to feel excluded !! a lil' left behind !!! but 🥺 intimate relationships are not the same as hobbies or tv shows that our pals are into for the moment 🥺 and i think the fact that you do feel scared is !! v important !! and something that you should pay attention to !! 🥺🩷 regarding a vulnerable moment such as this, i think you would regret it more to rush into it with someone while you're scared, more than you would regret just waiting 🥺 until the time feels right 🥺

being a virgin does not equate to being childish, friend 🥺 you're right !! you're a grown ass woman with a job and a license !! that can drink and rent a car !! you're a multi-faceted human being 🥺 and you can't be narrowed down any one way !! 🥺 this is just another piece of you 🥺 and life is so different for everyone, you really can't compare yours or your experiences with others !! bc all that usually does is leave us feeling off-track, when really !! there is no track !!

it's not silly to feel this way 🥺 it's normal !! and i'm sure it will come and go and that's okay ! but know what's best for you 🥺 and if you're feeling a scared or unsure, it's so important to listen to that little piece of you ! 🥺

i am kissing you on the head friend ! and hoping that you don't feel pressured or left behind 🥺🩷✨️

[athenasparrow]

Another ✨ coming soon ✨ announcement because I'm very productive these days!!!

– All In The Name of Science –

Summary

Science is supposed to be objective and clinical with data and beakers and clipboards. Never in a million years did James imagine it could be like this.

Snippet One

“You want me to what?” James splutters, sure he’s misheard as he stares wide-eyed at his childhood friend, the unrequited love of his life, and currently, the woman asking him to be her fake boyfriend so they can join a research study on the female orgasm – and yes, apparently he’ll have to give her one.

Snippet Two

“You can touch yourself if you want,” Lily says and he nearly chokes. “Dora said it's okay as long as you don't touch me - okay for the research I mean.” Right. The fucking science.

[robotpussy]

i think corperations should continue to make shitty movies based on a million intellectual properties and brands so they can collapse 👍

[nosygay]

oh you know how tinder doesn't let you send photos, I'm assuming because of the amount of unsolicited dick pic type things? I think WhatsApp should block links to articles. this is hate speech

[green-mountain-goose]

why're things so fucked upppppp~

[ratspider]

i gotta be honest i am stoked to be a janitor. i see mops and i get excited

[nevalizona]

Woke up with stupid ass J*hn S*wyer on the brain😒