#but for edits and sensitivity readers (the most expensive of the bunch) and a book cover

[whumpyourdamnpears]

when I get bored, I like to look at self-publishing and the work associated with it. finding out it’ll take $9k+ to self-publish was not it

[authorkimberlygrey]

The things you need to start the self publishing thing

This is a day late, doesn’t even follow the how to do the thing format, and my dyslexia is running rampant today so ther’s probably six billion typos and mispellings but fuck it let’s goooooooo

Shit you’ll need before you can even get to the shit you need: 

A complete manuscript

I’m talking multiple drafts here people. Beta readers, self edits, tears, blood sacrifice, the works. Unfortunately, this isn’t 1920, we cannot publish our first drafts. 

I mean, you can but its not gonna go well. 

Money

Like. Lots of money. This shit is Expensive. 

A Plan

Don’t be like me. Don’t just suddenly go “alright let’s publish” one day

Actually lay out a timeline for yourself 

Expect delays 

So Many Delays

Plan for publishing at least like six months in advance you will thank yourself later I promise

Ingramspark vs. Createspace or whatever they call it now. They changed the name the other day I think

I went for ingramspark 

Because 

Fuck amazon

Ingramspark is More Professional 

Everyone else also thinks “fuck amazon”

You’ll be able to sell your book more places this way. 

This one is a p personal decison so look this shit up yourself. 

One you’ve got that shit, you can get this other shit

First things first, hire an editor. There are a shit ton of different editors out there, I’m not listing them all, mostly because I don’t remember them all and a lot of them overlap anyway. The majority of places will let you pick an editing ‘package’ that’ll combine several types. Go with that. 

Alright I’ll list a couple kinds of editor. Just the ones I can remember tho, I’m not looking them up again.

Content Editor-looks over the big picture, the story itself. Fuck that grammar bullshit, this is about lookign for plot holes and character inconsistencies and shit. Basically a beta on steroids, I love these dudes. 

Line Editor-this is what everyone thinks of when they say editor. They do the grammar shit. 

Sensitivity reader-make sure you’re not making a dick of yourself, good thing to have. 

Learn how to Format the book

This one you actually can do yourself, its not like...unattainably difficult, especially if you can get ahold of Microsoft Word. 

The basics are: 

Book Size

8.5x5.5 is pretty much the most common

And that’s the interior pages, the cover itself tends to add a lil bit onto that and so if you go measure a bunch of books you’re gonna get 9x6 or something

Font

12 pt. Times New Roman is the standard

Margins.

I think 1 inch is standard? 

Listen, this shit gets complicated and its been like nine months since I did it, I’ll link you some things at the end so you can get a better idea. 

 Header and Footer

Pro tip: Center all of this shit, that way you don’t have to fuck around with aligning it right on the corners of the page. 

Author name on one page, book name on the other

You can do evens or odds, I don’t think there’s a standard

Page number on every page 

EXCEPT: the first page of a new chapter

Just to make things more difficult, nothing goes on those pages. Because fuck you. 

Widows and Orphans 

Yeah I know “what the fuck does that mean???” 

You know how sometimes you’ll have this one sentence that’s just hogging a whole page? Yeah those 

Or those times that a sentence goes onto the next page all on its own

I’m not sure which of those are widows and which ones are orphans tbh. I mean... I could probably guess but nothing is simple you know? 

There’s some places that’ll tell you to do this manually by changing the line spacing and/or text size of each page? 

Don’t fuckign do that

That’s ludicrous. 

There’s literally a button for it on microsoft word

This is one of those things where the easy solution is actually the one you’re supposed to use. 

Oh yeah, indents

No you can’t just press tab

That would be too easy.

And nothing can be easy, remember? 

0.3/0.5 is the standard I think. 

Also make sure everything is left aligned. 

And the line spacing is usually double spaced? I think? 

I want to say there was a certain number of lines per page that was standard and you’re supposed to fiddle around until you get that. So enjoy. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0IGkyMhsr28

https://firstmanuscript.com/proper-manuscript-format/

A Cover

Unless you’re like A Professional don’t do this yourself its way more complicated than you’d think 

Have a Solid Idea of what you want your cover to look like. Just shrugging and going “idk man” isn’t going to help anyone. 

This isn’t just the fun artsy shit either

Figure out where you’re putting the blurb and your author picture and your author bio, which, btw, you gotta write too. I’ll get there. 

Author Bio 

Jenna Morecci did a whole video on this so def look that up cause that’s pretty much the best info I’ve got for you. 

But: 

3-5 sentences

Written in third person

Yes its weird to write about yourself this way, just go with it. 

Embrace your inner “whatever fictional character talks in third person” and go with it

One sentence on your experience with writing whatever this is

One sentence about yourself/shit you like 

And one on something else, I’m not watching the whole video over for this. Just go watch Jenna, you’ll love her.

I don’t think I’ve ever read an author bio and I don’t know anyone else who does either but I guess somebody must so we all have to suffer. 

A Copyright thing

Like. Register your book with the copy right office so that if someone tries to steal it you can tell them to stop. 

Yes this costs money too. Becasue fuck you I guess. 

This sounds really intimidating but honestly you just fill out paperwork and while that stresses me personally out beyond rationality its not really that bad. 

Don’t forget to add the copyright page in your book too, there’s a thing on the format for it, lemme look 

Here ya go: 

https://blog.reedsy.com/copyright-page/

An ISBN

Most people upon reading this immeditaely went “what the fuck is an ISBN?”

If you didn’t then good job you’re more prepared than I was. Good on you. 

An ISBN is like an identifying number for your book. 

Actually, its an identifying number for specifically this format of your book. If you’re planning on doing a paperback and an ebook or a hardcover or an audiobook or whatever, you need to get an ISBN for Every Format of it

You can buy ISBNs ((in the US at least, I don’t know about other countries sorry)) on Bowker.com 

Why did they name it that? 

I don’t know

You would think that they’d maybe pick a more...I don’t know, relevant name for their site? 

Listen, a fact of publishing a book is that everyone involved has conspired to make is as frustrating as humanly possible. You’re just going to have to accept that. 

Why is their whole site mascot a bird? 

Also don’t know. They’re having a good time with it I guess.

Maybe something to do with Bowker sounding like bough?

Also a barcode! 

Yeah, didn’t think you’d have to buy that did you? 

Neither did I but here we are

Actually you don’t have to buy one if you use ingramspark, they’ll give you one when you use their cover template thing apparently. 

Know what price you want to sell the book for

Even in self publishing, the place you’re going through is gonna want a piece of the pie. Enjoy that. 

Ingramspark has a calculator for that actually, its p cool

You can stick the price in the barcode 

Idk if that relevant but that’s a thing you can do?

uhh…..I’m pretty sure I’m forgetting something….

You might want to get an author website set up? 

You should probably have that before now but if youre doing this Chaos Style (™) like I did then you probably want it up before you publish so you can put it on the book somewhere. 

People you need to hire: 

Editor

Cover Designer

Possibly a formatting person if you decide fuck that shit

 Which. Understandable

Shit you need to get a handle on

Formatting

 If you decide fuck yourself

 Which. Understandable

Copyright

Price

ISBN 

OH yeah. 

Marketing Junk 

You honeslty need to have a handle on this shit Waaaaaaayyyy the fuck in the future. If you’re only thinking about it like...now its probably not great. 

The Chaos Method is not generally a good approach

See: Ascendant’s release was essentially a flop and even tho people who read the book love the book I’m still struggling to get people to read the book

Psst read the book its great I promise

Your book release is like. The Biggest Chance for marketing shit 

Get on top of that junk

Giveaways

Posts about it 

Just

Everything all the time everywhere

You definitely need a schedule for this 

Like seriously

Make a plan. 

That’s pretty much it I think. I mean...look in other places too because like I said earlier, its been months since I did this and when I did do it it was the Chaos Method of me just going “I’m gonna publish now” and Doing That. 

Get a plan, believe in yourself. Get a publishing mentor

Someone who’s done this shit before and can give you some encouragement and direction. 

It probably shouldn’t be me but I guess if you need help I’m game to do what I can. 

Also be prepared to like. Crash, mentally, So Hard. Its terrible. See my older post for all the shitty shit about publishing this way.

[heartsawaken]

beneath  the  cut  you  will  find  headcanons  that  have  collected  in  my  mind  lately  of  my  muse  ,  miles  oh  ,  a  twenty  -  three  year  old  social  media  influencer  and  youtuber  who  is  a  part  of  sky  house  .  (  tagging  @ofblueflames​​  so  she  can  read  all  about  him  tomorrow c:  )

✶  he  does  not  drink  soda  .  a  majority  of  his  caffeine  intake  is  from  fruit  based  black  teas  .  any  energy  drink  he’s  ever  seen  drinking  is  either  because  of  sponsorship  with  the  company  (  and  honestly  he  doesn’t  really  even  drink  them  .  they  just  are  props  )  or  because  he  really  fucked  up  and  is  pulling  an  all-nighter  or  two  in  order  to  catch  up  on  any  film  editing  he  needs  to  finish  .  but  in  general  he  isn’t  the  biggest  fan  of  the  carbonation  .

✶  has  a  cup  of  tea  every  night  at  around  8pm  ,  a  habit  he  picked  up  from  his  grandparents  during  the  short  amount  of  time  he  lived  with  them  before  moving  into  the  sky  house  .  normally  makes  his  tea  and  curls  up  on  the  couch  with  a  book  and  reads  for  about  half  an  hour  or  however  long  it  takes  to  finish  the  cup  .  

✶  prefers  working  alongside  family  owned  and/or  small  businesses  when  it  comes  to  promoting  and  sponsoring  their  products  .  while  he  has  no  issue  asking  for  big  bucks  from  big  corporations  he  normally  just  asks  if  he  can  have  one  or  two  outfits  /  a  three  course  meal  /  etc  on  the  house  to  advertise  and  if  they  don’t  see an  influx  on  their  customer  base  from  the  posts  he’s  made  using  those  free  items  offered  than  he’ll  pay  them  x  -  amount  of  times  the  costs  for  not  only  receiving  free  things  but  also  for  not  being  able  to  keep  his  word  .  (  he’s  never  had  to  do  that  .  but  he’s  given  money  to  them  anyways  .  )

✶  recently  bought  a  cockatiel  who  he  named  r2  because  he  plans  on  teaching  him  how  to  make  all  the  noises  that  r2d2  does  from  star  wars  .

✶  claims  that  he  doesn’t  like  k  -  pop  groups  that  much  but  could  probably  not  only  name  ,  but  do  the  dance  (  at  least  the  chorus  )  of  any  group  .  honestly  he  just  has  too  much  time  on  his  hands  .  .  .  and  by  that  i  mean  he  hates  editing  and  will  find  any  way  to  put  it  off  .  if  you  want  to  hear  to  his  top  25  ,  you  can  click  [  this  link  ]  and  it’ll  take  you  to  a  spotify  playlist  for  him :]

✶  two  main  games  he  plays  are  animal  crossing  new  horizons  and  minecraft  .  he  did  one  time  do  a  pokemon  sun  nuzlocke  video  though  .  his  youtube  channel  is  most  viewed  for  his  true  crime  (  much  like  the  crime  junkies  podcast  ) cooking  series  and  conspiracy  mukbangs  .  while  of  course  he  would  never  admit  it  to  anybody  outside  of  sky  house  ,  his  cooking  series  is  done  while  he  is  high  and  honestly  devolves  usually  into  him  giving  his  own  theories  on  what  happened  and  who  did  it  while  eating  the  uncooked  or  half  -  finished  meals  . 

✶  the  house  has  a  douchebag  jar  for  him  because  he  doesn’t  really  think  about  what  he  says  before  saying  it  and  whoever  has  faced  the  brunt  of  his  words  most  at  the  end  of  the  month  gets  the  contents  as  retribution  .  

✶  played  among  us  for  all  of  like  a  day  before  getting  so  frustrated  he  flung  his  phone  across  his  room  and  put  a  hole  in  the  wall  , cracking  its  screen  because  he  kept  fat  fingering  the  report  button  as  imposter  and  outing  himself  . 

✶  his  body  temperature  runs  high  for  the  average  person  so  he  gets  hot  very  easily  .

✶  when  he’s  driving  it  is  his  own  personal  rule  that  he  must  play  fergilicious  at  the  highest  acceptable  volume  and  sing  it  word  for  word  .  that  or  my  humps  .  

✶  is  one  of  the  oldest  in  the  group  but  acts  like  one  of  the  youngest  .  he  can  flip  older  brother  /  dad  mode  on  really  quickly  though  ,  just  like  he  can  go  from  being  drunk  to  drunk  but  seemingly  sober  need  the  situation  arose  .

✶  was  involved  in  a  lot  of  fights  at  school  growing  up  both  on  and  off  campus  .  he  doesn’t  like  doing  it  anymore  but  has  no  problem  throwing  punches  if  someone  is  actively  threatening  ,  swinging  at  the  younger  members  of  sky  hose  ,  or  because  they  swung  first  .  he’s  pretty  calm  in  those  situations  when  sober  but  it’s  when  he’s  been  drinking  that  it  really  comes  out  .

✶  hates  beer  and  wine  ,  hard  liquor  only  .  occasionally  will  drink  wine  at  any  fancy  restaurants  he  goes  to  or  just  orders  the  most  expensive  whiskey  on  the  rocks  .  

✶  loves  sharks  and  definitely  owns  two  of  the  almost  two  foot  long  shark  plushies  from  ikea  .  originally  only  left  with  one  but  went  back  for  another  because  ‘  he  needed  a  friend  .  ‘  both  are  on  his  bed  and  he  actually  sleeps  with  them  .

✶  the  wall  that  his  bed  is  against  has  a  bunch  of  sharpie  drawings  and  writing  on  it  from  nights  where  he  can’t  sleep  and  needs  to  get  his  thoughts  out  so  he  can  go  to  sleep  .  it  helps  him  fall  asleep  and  some  of  his  most  honest  highkey  sad  admissions  and  thoughts  are  on  that  wall  .

✶   talented  artist  who  makes  some  pretty  gorgeous  scenery  paintings  .  can  draw  realistic  people  ,  but  tends  to  draw  little  chibi -  esque  sketches  (  think  anelderlymeme  on  tiktok  ?  )  and  makes  little  comic  skits  and  pages  .  he  is  self - taught  and  picked  painting  and  drawing  up  as  a  hobby  when  he  was  seven  .

✶  dreads  any  family  visits  because  it  means  sitting  through  a  dinner  of  being  constantly  berated  and  spoken  poorly  about  because  he’s  not  as  successful  or  as  intelligent  (  seemingly  )  as  his  younger  sister  and  for  the  fact  that  he  “  doesn’t  have  a  real  job  “  .  

✶  attending  the  university  of  seoul  on  a  business  major  in  marketing  and  advertising  .  his  grandparents  know  ,  and  a  few  members  of  sky  house  but  it  isn’t  something  he  talks  about  regularly  because  he  hates  school talk  and  avoids  it  at  all  costs  . 

✶  tough  talk  for  someone  who  is  actually  extremely  sensitive  ,  though  he  will  never  let  people  see  just  how  much  their  words  actually  upset  him  .  he’ll  wait  until  he’s  alone  and  /  or  the  adrenaline  has  passed  to  cry  over  it  . 

✶  his  main  causes  of  crying  is  homesickness  and  online  hate  .  he  wants  to  go  home  so  badly  ,  even  if  it’s  just  to  visit  but  doesn’t  want  to  deal  with  his  family  .  it’s  just  not  worth  it  in  the  long  run  .  he  also  takes  a  lot  of  online  hate  to  heart  even  though  he  knows  that  its  from  people  who  don’t  know  him  and  have  any  right  speaking  so  poorly  of  him  .

✶  avid  reader  of  pretty  much  everything  .  the  bookshelf  in  his  room  is  filled  completely  with  books  ,  and  there  are  even  books  he  recently  bought  and  are  waiting  to  be  read  sitting  on  top  of  it  .

✶  absolutely  loves  snow  .  he  will  spend  hours  outside  until  his  nose  is  red  as  can  be  ,  his  fingers  and  toes  are  numb  and  his  clothes  are  soaked  through  .  he  loves  the  cold  in  general  since  he’s  often  so  warm  .

✶  loves  to  cuddle  and  tends  to  sleep  better  if  he’s  hugging  something  or  somebody  ,  the  latter  will  put  him  to  sleep  almost  immediately  .

✶  almost  every  time  he  and  his  brother  are  together  it  ends  up  in  a  physical  altercation  .  his  brother  likes  to  dig  his  fingers  into  every  single  wound  that  miles  has  about  himself  and  his  family  and  his  parents  allow  it  ,  but  every  time  miles  throws  a  punch  or  tackles  his  brother  to  the  ground  are  surprised  .  it  takes  a  lot  to  get  both  boys  off  of  each  other  because  if  both  aren’t  restrained  they’ll  still  go  after  the  other  .

✶  absolutely  adores  his  sister  though  .  she’s  his  biggest  fan  and  adores  him  just  as  much  .