#but dad were a middle class finnish family

[dick-chugger]

My dad's having an episode of mani AMD he quit drinking (for now at least), so now he's just buying expensive shit. I could vomplain about irresponsible spending but also he's buying stuff for me, so I probably won't.

[vivianvixen]

Got tagged by @kiirasthursday

ARE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? The names I was bequathed at birth were from my parents' paternal grandfathers and my dad's middle name (yeah I got a lot of names, lay off). The name I chose later in life is, in a way, after the Lady of the Lake, with one middle name after a Finnish goddess. Does that count?

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Probably in January

DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Not yet!

WHAT SPORTS DO YOU PLAY/HAVE YOU PLAYED? Tennis, though not regularly for several years because I lack convenient access to a court or playing partner.

DO YOU USE SARCASM? I've been known to, yes.

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? I have no idea, maybe the hair because if you change that I might not recognize you.

WHAT’S YOUR EYE COLOR? Bluish gray-green, depending on the lighting.

SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Happy endings if I'm picking between the two. I don't mind scary movies, though not a fan of gore.

ANY TALENTS? I was taught at a young age that recognizing your own talents was not a cool thing to do and would get you ridiculed as a braggart.

WHERE WERE YOU BORN? In the capital region of Finland, hospital was in a different city than where I actually lived after being born so this is sometimes kind of a tricky question.

WHAT ARE YOUR HOBBIES? Anime, gaming, and posting, three of the four pillars of modern misery. Also writing in general and not just in da blogs.

DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS? We had a family dog when I was a teenager. Now I just have lots of plushies.

HOW TALL ARE YOU? 69 inches.

FAVOURITE SUBJECT? Computer class, it was low effort and you could surf the internet which was a big deal in my school years.

DREAM JOB? Film director.

Only person I'd tag in this would just be the one who tagged me in the first place so not doing that.

[ourimpavidheroine]

May I ask why it is you didn't write any homophobia into your fanfic?

You may!

I was born in 1969. When I was a young girl growing up in the 70′s, there was absolutely nothing available to me that referenced anything queer. No books, no media, nothing at all. And by nothing, I mean NOTHING.

Were there queer people in the 1970′s? Oh my yes. But I knew nothing about them because it was just not part of my world. As far as I knew, queer people did not exist.

The first time I learned about queer people was overhearing a conversation when I was about nine or so about my Dad’s co-worker Ernie, a lovely first generation Chinese American man who often came to our house to hang out and who once brought me a beautiful doll from China that had long black hair and a hanfu with lilies all over it. My mother was saying something to my Dad about not wanting Ernie around my younger brother and me because he was gay and my father got pretty pissed off at her about it. I couldn’t understand why Ernie being happy would be such a bad thing, so I asked my Dad later and he explained what that meant. My Dad being the guy he was, he pretty much normalized it for me and I took it at face value.

The summers of 1983 and 1984 I attended acting school in San Francisco and that’s when I learned a lot more about queer people. That was smack dab in the middle of the AIDS epidemic; one of the teachers lost his best friend the night before our class and sat on the floor and sobbed and sobbed about it. It was, you can believe me, a real eye opener.

But you see, this is what the media told me about gay people as a teenager in the 80′s: they all had AIDS and were spreading it to straight people. They were pedophiles. The men were desperate, lonely people or overdramatic bitches that fucked anything that moved. The women were mean and ugly and out to steal other people’s wives or weird hippy pagan ladies that never shaved and smelled. They would all come to a bad end, one way or the other.

My biology/sex ed teacher in 9th grade told us that same-sex crushes were normal for teenagers and that they would go away and didn’t mean we were gay. Oh, I thought. Well then I guess laying awake all night thinking about Annie Lennox in the Sweet Dreams video and that one redheaded girl on the varsity volleyball team is just something I’ll grow out of.

(Spoiler alert: I did not grow out of it.)

I did not think of myself as being queer. For one thing, I still found boys attractive. For another, Mr. Powell told us it was something we’d grow out of. And I wasn’t like any of those women that we started seeing bits and pieces of in the media. So I just didn’t think about it.

I was at university in the late 80′s and early 90′s, studying theater, and then of course I was introduced to plenty of queer people. That was when I realized that yeah, okay, this is not going away. I am attracted to both men and women; I am bisexual. (Pansexual wasn’t something I’d heard of then but it’s how I identify now.)

Were we in the media? Eh...not so much. A glimpse here and there. But again, not much. And when we were in the news? It was Matthew Shephard (oh god, I remember sitting on the floor and hyperventilating when I saw that on the news) or it was Boys Don’t Cry or Will and Grace where Will was played as straight by a straight guy and never had a boyfriend and Jack was played for laughs.

This was not what my life was like.

I did come out to my family in my 20′s when I got a girlfriend; no one liked my girlfriend (god, she was so hot but such bad news; the sex was so so so good but she was so so so rotten, learn from my fail, children) but the fact that I was queer fazed none of them on either side. I come from very liberal stock, however. (Very liberal.) When I divorced my first husband and brought my then Finnish girlfriend around everyone loved her. It was not a traumatic experience for me. It hasn’t been traumatic for me in Finland, for the most part. 

Of course I understand that this is not the norm for everyone coming out. I know people suffer from discrimination; I am next door to Russia, I know what the fuck is going on in Chechnya. Trans people in Finland are still required by law to be sterilized before they can legally transition. Gay marriage only became legal here very recently. I know kids get kicked out by their parents, still get sent to conversion camps. I am aware of the kind of violence transpeople are subjected to.

But this is my point. What are people still seeing on the news? What do they see in media? Homophobia, coming out trauma, violence, rejection, people having to engage in political debate for their right to simply exist. Is it better than it was even ten years ago? Oh yes, it really is. Absolutely it is. Is it good, though? Is it normalized?

Nope. Not yet. And I firmly believe that a huge part of that is because queer media is still being produced by straight people. Many of whom mean well, of course. But it’s not their story. 

I know it can be very important, especially for younger readers, to read stories about coming out, about homophobia. It’s a way for them to process it and I’m not about to sit here and say that’s wrong. It’s not wrong! But there’s a world of difference between a queer person writing their own experiences as a form of processing and a straight person using those experiences as a means of conflict in their stories.

Do I think Bryke had good intentions writing a whole coming out arc for Korra in the comics? Retconning homophobia into their universe? I do. I absolutely do! I think they are very careful and thoughtful about representation. It matters to them.

But the fact remains that Korra’s coming out and the subsequent retcon of homophobia was written by a straight man in order to add conflict/drama to his story. There is no other reason for it to be there; Korra being queer does not require a coming out storyline nor subsequent homophobia. 

Let me repeat this:

Being queer does not require coming out or homophobia. That is something that straight people add to the stories of our lives, both in real life as well as media.

So that’s what I am doing in my fic. I am normalizing queerness. Am I doing it perfectly? Of course not; I’ve been learning to write with my fic, and I’ve made certain choices I would like to go back and change now. But I am making a choice to write the kind of world I think queer people should be living in: I am normalizing us.

My queer characters have negative things happen to them; they are as human as I can make them. They don’t live in a utopia. But the things that happen to them do not happen because of their gender or sexuality. I am not now nor will I ever be killing my gays.

[suckitsurveys]

What is your favorite type of cat? Ramona, Saké, and Friday.

If you could delete any word from existence, which word would it be and why? Tr*mp. It makes my blood curdle when I hear that name.

What is your favorite swearword? Fuck.

What celebrity do you wish you looked more like? I’m okay.

If you had your way, what color(s) would you dye your hair? I do have my way and it’s currently blue and purple.

Do you support the LGBTQ community? If not, state your reasons. You are entitled to your opinions. It’s not an opinion if it’s diminishing an entire group of people--you’re just an asshole.

Do you like seafood? If so, what is your favorite? If not, what is your favorite type of food? I LOVE seafood. Crab is my favorite.

Have you ever gone vegan/vegetarian? Nope and I never will. I’m trying to cut back on my red meat intake though and stick to fish and poultry only.

Have you ever eaten a veggie burger? I have.

If you could master any sport, which one would you choose? Swimming.

If you could meet any major political figure, who would it be? What would you say to him/her? I’d like to line up every republican and punch each one in the face.

Do you play any unique instruments? No.

In school, did you take any classes to learn how to play any instruments? No.

Do you like applesauce? Sure.

Do you know any German words? Sure.

How about any Portuguese words? No.

Did you actually pay attention in Spanish class? Yeah.

If you drink Monster, what is your favorite flavor? If you don’t drink Monster, why not? I don’t like energy drinks. Do you think any of your family members voted for Mitt Romney? Did you/would you? I don’t know.

Do you have a reason to hate anyone at the moment? Yes.

Is it easier for you to forgive or to pretend it never happened? Depends.

Are you one of those people who remembers EVERYTHING? I remember a lot of really weird details about things.

Do you sometimes pretend you don’t remember something about someone? No? I can’t think of a reason I’d need to do this?

Do you own any Webkinz stuffed animals? If so, do you have a Webkinz online account? Do you still go on it? No.

If you had/have a Club Penguin account, how old were you when you got it? I never had one.

Do you own any Nintendo video game consoles/handhelds? I have a GBC and a DS laying around somewhere.

Do/did you ever own a Blackberry? Nope.

Do you know the band Noah & the Whale? Yes.

Do you listen to Ingrid Michaelson? I don’t not listen to her.

If you have a song stuck in your head, what’s the name of it & the artist? Imagine by Ariana Grande.

Do you know who Sue Lyons is? How about Dominique Swain? Nope.

Unpopular opinion time. Be honest. The Beatles - overrated or not? Both.

What religion were you raised in? Are you still that religion, if you had one? I wasn’t raised in any religion. We weren’t baptized. My mom was a very spiritual person and I am pretty sure she believed in God in one way or another, but she didn’t follow a religion. She had her own version of faith. My dad just didn’t care about that stuff at all, haha. They were both respectful of people who did follow religion and I felt like they would have been/would be cool with whatever paths my sister and I decided to lead.

What religion/spiritual path intrigues you the most, if any? I like the idea that people live on in spirit in nature, and that there are spirits that control nature and shit, whatever that would be called.

What ancient culture intrigues you the most, if any? Greek.

What was/is your favorite subject in school? Sociology.

What was the last name of your second grade teacher? Mrs. Yamanaka.

Who was your favorite teacher of all time? My Kindergarten teacher Mrs. Furuta. She taught us so much; not just basic kindergarten stuff. We learned about different cultures and she set up these “trips” where we’d pretend we were in an airplane and “fly” to the country we were learning about. She would set up these “shops” where we could “buy” food and trinkets from the country with fake money. We had an EPIC fort we build out of boxes. We celebrated the Chinese New Year and did a ton of origami. I remember her class vividly and fondly. She recently reached out to my sister (who also had her) and I which was a really nice surprise and showed how much she loved her students.

Were/are you a teacher’s pet? In that class ^ yes. I could already read by the time I started Kindergarten and she’d ask me to read to the class every once in a while, which I LOVED.

Do you like pink lemonade? I don’t mind it but it’s not my first choice.

Do you have a Spotify account? I do.

Firefox or Chrome? Firefox for work, Chrome for everything else.

Safari or Internet Explorer? Neither, thanks.

Windows or Mac? Windows.

Desktop or laptop? Either is fine. I’m on a desktop currently at work.

What’s your favorite U2 song, if you have one? Eh.

What’s your favorite song that’s playing on the radio, if you have one? Anything Ariana right now.

What’s a song that you remember from your childhood? Graceland by Paul Simon.

Are/were your parents hippies? Yup.

Would you ever consider getting dreadlocks? No because I am white.

If you had a baby girl right now, what would her middle name(s) be? I am never ever ever having kids, but if hell froze over and we did have a daughter, her middle name would be Kay because it’s my mom’s middle name and also Mark’s mom’s middle name.

What heritage does your last name imply? German/Czech.

How about your middle name? I just looked it up because I never knew but apparently it’s Roman?

And first? My first name is Hebrew.

What is your heritage, anyway? German, Czech, Jewish, Finnish, Swedish, some other shit.

Were your parents born in the United States? Most importantly, were you? If not, what country? Yes.

Name an American stereotype? Lol.

Name a stereotype from your country/culture? Nah.

Do you have any paint in your house? Is it wall paint, art paint, or something else? I have art paint.

Do you ever swing at the playground & listen to music? No.

What was your favorite age so far? I don’t know.

What was your least favorite age so far? I don’t know.

Were you/are you in a rush to grow up? Nah.

What’s your opinion on tattoos in the workforce? How about piercings? I see no issue with either.

Do women breastfeeding in public make you feel uncomfortable? Why or why not? Nope. Why should it?

Do you know the band The Last Place You Look? No.

If not, you should check them out. Do you like A Day To Remember? If not, they’re a lot like The Last Place You Look. Cool story.

What is the most annoying commercial you’ve seen/heard this past week? I saw this ad on a YouTube video the other day that was selling some menstrual cup thing and it kept saying how you can’t have sex on your period?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

What is your favorite holiday? Halloween and Christmas.

What holidays do you choose not to participate in, but others celebrate? I’m sure there are a few.

“Happy Holidays,” “Merry Christmas,” or “Merry X-Mas?’ Whatever.

Does it even matter to you which one people say? No.

Why is that every major Christian holiday adopts Pagan traditions in its celebrations? Uh.

[trojanjean]

Tag Game: 15 Questions, 15 Mutuals

not tagged by anyone but i wanted to do this so! 

Are you named after anyone?

no :) also i wanna use this platform to say that i like my name (& my middle name) a LOT lot and i think my name is perfect for my personality? idk it’s just the one thing i’ve never wanted to change about myself

When was the last time you 😢?

yesterday when i was told my grandma has cancer lol 

Do you have kids?

noo

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

i used to but nowadays not so much? i use it at work bc other people do too and that’s how we communicate there but that’s just me copying people’s habits to accommodate 

What’s the first thing you notice about people?

their smile !! and whether they look you in the eyes when talking to you 

What’s your eye color?

uhh greeni-sh gray?

Scary movie or happy endings?

i can’t even watch a trailer of a scary movie without having nightmares so i never ever wanna see one EVER. i love happy endings.

Any special talents?

hmm, no? 

Where were you born?

the same city i live now. most of my family is here too so. 

What are your hobbies?

nothing, atm? i haven’t written in a solid year so i can’t really say writing is my hobby. but i try to read a few times a week, even if it’s only half a page or so. sometimes i go swimming but i’ve been having a cycle of cold-period-cold again-period again so i haven’t been able to. but that’s about it. lately i’ve been trying to learn how to cook but it’s mostly me looking at those “three ingredient vegan meals on budget” videos on youtube. i used to do yoga but my physiotherapist told me not to bc i have problems with my back and hips that only get worse if i try to stretch. 

Do you have any pets?

my mom has a dog but he’s a little bit mine too bc we got him together when i was 11. 

How tall are you?

158cm. 

What sports do you play/have you played?

i did gymnastics and karate as a kid before i started riding. i rode for about 6-7 years before i quit (it’s super expensive) and that’s about it. 

Favorite subject in school?

school made me overall anxious and i was afraid of every single class bc i wasn’t very good and i hated when the teachers asked me stuff, but i liked finnish and english. 

Dream job?

oh man, i have no idea. maybe geology or environmental science but fuck i am the WORST when it comes to maths/physics/chemistry/biology soo... i would love to be a writer but i have nothing to say? idk? i just know i dont want This and i want to find something my dad will approve of but idk idk idk. 

not tagging anyone, feel free to do this! 

[mcrmadness]

The tags were mine (I was born in 1991), and my fear of war actually came from my anxiety and the fact my dad has been obsessed with history for ages, and he used to watch lots of history documents. I sometimes saw those too, and I got scared and I actually thought every plane and every army vehicle meant a war was coming. I was having proper anxiety attacks before I was even 7 years old, but I wasn't afraid of any specific country. Just war.

Anyhow, they say that the traumas of previous generations can stay in our genes and I sometimes wonder if it's that. My paternal grandpa as well as my maternal grandpa both served in WW2 in Finland, both also survived and eventually died of other reasons.

At least my grandpa wrote a diary as he was there, and a few years ago we got a box with lots of papers that belonged to him and those also came with stuff related to the army and what he did in WW2 and where. I don't remember now what all those said, but it's such a weird thought that they saw the WW2 war at least to some extent and returned home too.

Neither of my grandmas are alive either anymore so I'm not sure what they did back then. I think they were still kids or the other one was maybe already a teenager/young adult. But I do remember sometimes discussing war with my parents and asking where would we go if a war happened, and my mom said we would have to go to Sweden probably, or that they would have to send us to Sweden. And I always found that a scary idea because I was very depended on my home and family.

I don't remember any hostility towards Russia in my family either. I live in East Finland, so I got used to having Russian kids in our school, and also some of my friends were Russians. I sometimes was wondering why did they move here but never asked about it, because it wasn't that important for a child that young (in middle school or so), but now I'm again wondering if something happened in the 90s because so many families moved here back then and many of these kids did not speak a word of Finnish when they came to our school. Unfortunately there's always been more or less xenophobia towards Russians even in kids, maybe it was learned from adults... but fortunately never anything that bad, and I at least remember my class usually coming well along with the kids who were originally from Russia.

If the worst fears of Europe are realised and the conflict in Ukraine spreads across the continent to other neighbours of Russia, then Finland will be ready.

It has supplies. At least six months of all major fuels and grains sit in strategic stockpiles, while pharmaceutical companies are obliged to have 3-10 months’ worth of all imported drugs on hand.

It has civilian defences. All buildings above a certain size have to have their own bomb shelters, and the rest of the population can use underground car parks, ice rinks, and swimming pools which stand ready to be converted into evacuation centres.

And it has fighters. Almost a third of the adult population of the Nordic country is a reservist, meaning Finland can draw on one of the biggest militaries relative to its size in Europe.

“We have prepared our society, and have been training for this situation ever since the second World War,” says Tytti Tuppurainen, Finland’s EU minister. After spending eight decades living first in the shadow of the Soviet Union and now Russia, the threat of war in Europe “has not hit us as a surprise”.

continue reading

[mybullshitsensesaretingling]

Things Unsaid

Request: Hey! Could you do a Jim Kirk x reader where the drunk reader accidentally confesses her feelings over drinks to the crew but Kirk. Reader is scared of getting to a relationship cause of what happened with her parents, how her father's infidelity got the best of him/destroyed family, and how she keeps on being put aside as the "other girl". The reader and Jim have been close friends ever since they had class together at the academy. Reader would get him out of whatever trouble he may be in. Reader has a promotion and Kirk finds out; Kirk isn't too happy but reluctantly congratulates her. Bones and Uhura decides to tell Kirk reader's true feelings and Kirk goes to find reader to confess his feelings to her before it's too late. - @missmle712

A/N: I’m gonna be real with you guys. I read over maybe half of this, but my friend read it and gave it the ok, so I’m just gonna trust her judgement. 

“I’m exhausted,” Jim sighed, leaning against the bar.

You laughed, causing him to send a shocked look your way.

“You’ve been saying that for eight hours, Jim,” you explained. “Go to bed.”

“No, I promised I would spend time with you tonight.”

“It’s fine,” you smiled. “Leonard will keep me company.”

Leonard looked up at you from his drink on your other side. “What am I doing?”

“A bar stool handcuff dance to the sounds of a mint julep being mixed,” you said without looking at him.

“Do I get to drink the mint julep after?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, alright then.”

“See. I’ve gotten entertainment now and everything.” You put your hands on Jim’s shoulders and steered him towards the door. “Please, go to bed.”

“But I haven’t seen you guys in a week,” he whined.

“We’ll talk tomorrow,” you promised.

“But-”

“If you don’t go to bed I’ll take away your TV privileges for a week.”

“Hey, I’m your senior officer; I take away your TV privileges.”

“Health trumps seniority,” you smiled as you walked into the hall. “You’re sleep deprived and if you don’t get some sleep soon, I’ll tell Leonard. And he’ll be mean about it.”

“Fine. I’m gone.”

“Good. I’ll see you tomorrow, Captain.”

He waved over his shoulder as he started down the hall.

You turned and headed back into the bar. You slid into a booth across from Uhura and Sulu.

“You’re not his mom, you know,” Leonard reminded you as he handed you a drink and sat down next to you.

“I don’t act like his mom.” You looked into the drink. “I just like taking care of him.”

“Yeah, you like something else too,” he grumbled.

“Hey, what exactly is in a mint julep?” you asked in an attempt to change the subject.

Uhura and Sulu shared a knowing look.

“Stop looking at each other like that,” you said.

“Like what?” Uhura said innocently.

“Like you know some secret about me.”

“We’re not doing that.”

“Then what are you smiling about?” You knew as soon as the words were out of your mouth that it was the wrong way to go. You should have continued to ignore them. Started talking about something else.

“You like him,” Sulu grinned.

“I do not.”

“You do.” Uhura sang.

“Good lord,” Bones grumbled, “You sound like a couple of middle schoolers.”

“Thank you,” you chimed.

“A couple of middle schoolers who are right,” he amended.

You narrowed your eyes at him. “Et tu, doctor?”

He put his hands up defensively. “Just calling it as I see it.”

“I may not be the CMO, but I know enough about the human body to make your death look like an accident,” you huffed into your drink as you lifted it up to your lips. 

“It’s not like they didn’t already know.”

“I was happy living in my house by the deNile river,” you mumbled, “then you came in with your monsoon of reality and flooded the place. Like you always do.”

Leonard rolled his eyes.

“It’s been going on for a while hasn’t it?” Uhura asked gently.

“You know what,” you slammed back the rest of your drink and raised a hand to flag down the waiter, “if we’re gonna talk about this, I’m gonna need to be a lot more drunk.”

The waiter replaced your empty glass with a full one.

“How-,” Sulu started, but you stopped him, holding up a figure as you took a long drink.

“Ok.” You placed the glass back on the table. “It started at the Academy.”

“And as it turns out, it’s a progressive disease,” Leonard added.  

“You would think between the two of us we could find a cure,” you joked.

“Oh, honey, this isn’t something that can be cured,” Uhuru said.

You ran a finger down the side of your glass. “Yeah, I know.”

“Does he know?” Sulu asked.

“God I hope not.”

“Well, as a happily married man-” he started.

“Here we go,” you and Leonard groaned in harmony.

“I’m just saying, it can’t go anywhere, if he doesn’t know.”

“Which means it can’t go to shit,” you pointed out. “Like it always does.”

“I’ll drink to that.” Leonard clinked his glass against yours.

Uhura rolled her eyes and looked at Sulu. “Oh, our bad. We seem to have forgotten we were talking to the cynical comedy hour.”

Chewing on your lower lip, you studied the test results in front of you. Something warm bumped against your upper arm. Glancing down out of the corner of your eye, you saw a fresh cup of coffee hovering beside you. Without looking back at who was offering it to you, most likely Leonard, you took the cup.

“Thanks,” you said, returning your attention to the screen. “Have we considered putting everyone in giant bubbles?”

“I’ll suggest it to command.” You were right; it was Leonard. He sat down on the corner of the table behind you. “Did you hear that Horatio needs a CMO?” he asked.

“Most people in Shakespeare's tragedies do.” Bringing your cup to your lips, you narrowed your eyes at the information.

“The ship, smartass.”

“Yeah, my friend at the academy told me.” You lifted your PADD up to check something against the results.

“I recommended you for the position.”

Slowly, you turned to look at him.

“It’s yours if you want it.”

A grin split across your face. “Really?”

“Yeah,” he smiled at you, “Really.”

“I’m gonna get my own office?”

“With your own desk and everything.”

“I’m gonna get to tell people what to do?” You were practically bouncing up and down with excitement.

“You do that now.”

“I’m gonna get to pose around the bridge while someone else looks after sickbay?”

“That’s not what I do.”

You were already headed to the door by the time he finished his sentence.

“Where are you going?”

“I have to call my mom. She’d kill me if I didn’t tell her immediately.” You turned back and gave him a quick hug. “Thank you!”

“You’re still on duty!” he called after you as you rushed out the door.

You came back through the door. “Right. Right. Work. I have an antidote to make.” You walked back to the screen. “I can call her at lunch.” You handed over your PADD. “Could you check this?”

He waved it off. “I don’t need to check it. I trust you.”

“You're gambling with the lives of our coworkers, mister.”

“Fine, I’ll check it.” He reached out for the PADD, but you pulled it into your chest.

“No, you already said you wouldn’t.” You pranced over to the table. “Can’t go back on your word now. But know this, if they grow an extra head because of this, it’s on you.”

“You won’t be able to blame me for things much longer.”

“Are you sure about that? I’m a blame game pro.”

“Would you just prepare those hypos?” He leaned up against the side of the table.

You did as he asked. As you worked silently, he looked over your shoulder at your PADD, just to make sure.

“You’ll be fine.”

You looked up at him. “I know.”

“This is the first time we’ll be apart in a decade.”

“Len, are you going to be ok?” you asked playfully.

He ignored you. “This is the first time you’ll be apart from him.”

You returned your attention to your work. “I’m sure I can look up 1990’s Finnish goth rock on Horatio.”

“Jim.”

“Oh. That him.”

He rolled his eyes.

“Maybe it’s for the best.”

“Maybe.”

“Busy?” you asked, walking into Jim’s office.

“I was just about to go find you.”

“Uh oh. What’d I do?” You placed a plate in front of him.

He gave the dish a disgusted look. “What is that?”

“Broccoli.”

“What’s it doing on my plate?”

“Developing a feudalist society.” You took a seat opposite him. “Why were you looking for me?”

“Well, it’s the darnedest thing. I just received transfer papers for you. But it must be some kind of mistake, a computer error maybe, because there’s no way you would transfer without telling me first.”

You hummed in response and took a bite of your lunch.

“So it was a mistake?” by the tone of his voice you could tell he already knew that wasn’t the case.

“No.”

“When were you planning on telling me?”

“When did you get the transfer papers?”

“About an hour ago.”

“Well,” You waved your fork in the air. “There you go. That’s when I told you.”

“You’re kidding, right?” he words had an edge to them.

“No?... Yes?” You sighed. “I’m sorry. I should have told you in person.”

“Yeah, you should have.” He pushed the broccoli around his plate.

“Come on don’t pout. It’s been a crazy week. You know I would have told you in person, if I could have.”

“I’m not pouting,” he grumbled.  

“Ok, you aren’t pouting.” You stared down at your food, not sure how to make this better.

“Why didn’t you talk to me about it before you made your decision?”

Your gaze rose back up to his face. “I didn’t think I had to.”

“You didn’t?”

“You and Leonard have co-authorisation and-”

He cut you off. “I’m not talking about regulations.”

“Were you going to tell me not to take the promotion?” you asked.

“Of course not.”

“Or that you knew of a better opportunity?”

“No.”

“Well, then I don’t see why it matters.” You loaded you fork up with another bite.

“Really?”

You set your fork down against your plate. “Is there a reason you’re mad at me about taking this job?”

“I’m not mad,” Jim said unconvincingly.

“Your tone of voice and expression of face are telling a different story.”

“I just thought you’d talk to me about it.”

“You’re not my dad, Jim,” you pointed out, “or my husband. I don’t have to discuss things with you before making a decision.”

“I know you don’t,” he growled.

“Don’t you think leaving here is hard enough without you being mad at me?”

“If it’s so hard, why are you leaving?”

Chewing on the inside of your cheek, you watched him. For the first time in years, you couldn’t read him. You had no idea what was going on inside his head.

“I have some work I should do,” it came out quieter than you had expected it to. “I’ll see you later.”

And with that you picked your plate back up and left.

You didn’t look up from your food as you made your way through the bridge.

“I didn’t miss lunch, did I? There was-” Leonard’s voice made you stop and look up. His words halted when he saw the expression you wore. “You ok, kid?”

“I’m fine.”

“What happened?”

“Nothing. I just remembered I have charts to finish.” You started to walk past him. “I’ll see you back there.”

Leonard exchanged a look with Uhura, who was sitting right behind where you had just been standing.

Without a word, she got to her feet and followed him into the captain’s ready room.

“Hey,” Jim said gruffly.

“What did you say?” Leonard asked.

“I say a lot of things, Bones; I’m going to need you to be a little more specific.”

“To (Y/N),” he clarified.

“Not much,” he said nonchalantly. “Just that I thought they would have talked to me about it. Then they accused me of being mad, which made them mad, and they left. We didn’t even get halfway through our meal.”

“Are you mad?” Uhura asked.

“Why would I be mad?”

“Because you don’t want them to leave,” Leonard suggested.

“Of course I don’t, but,” he stopped. But what?

“Have you considered telling them?” Uhura stepped closer to his desk.

“That I don’t want them to go? I think they already know.”

“No.” She sat down. “That you’re in love with them.”

“That I’m what?”

“You can be a real idiot sometimes,” Leonard mumbled.

“Excuse me?”

“You didn’t know?” Uhura asked.

“There’s nothing to know.”

“Sure there isn’t,” Leonard smirked. “But just so you know, the feeling or lack thereof is mutual.”

The chime of your door pierced through the silence that filled your room.

“Come in,” you called, going to your closet. You slid your palm against the inside of several hangers and lifted them from the rack.

Dropping them against your bare mattress you looked up to see who the guest was.

“Captain,” you smiled, “Was I expecting you?”

“No.” There was something in his eyes that you couldn’t quite place. “I hope I’m not interrupting.”

“I’m just finishing up packing,” you told him. “Have a seat. Can I get you anything?”

“I’m fine, thank you.”

You stared at him for a moment, waiting for him to give you a reason for his visit.

It was weird seeing him standing there so stiffly.  And he was so quiet. Not the soft, contemplative quiet you were used to seeing on him. It was a cold, uneasy quiet. The edges were too harsh to let the words flow naturally.

“It’s crazy,” you started quietly, needing the silence to be broken. “This is my whole life.” You stuck a freshly folded uniform into your duffel bag. “My whole existence. The biggest thing I’ve ever experienced. And it all fits so neatly into this bag.” You let big spaces hang off the end of each sentence, waiting for him to eventually fill one. “I’ve built my life around the idea that I’ll need to pack up and leave at a moment's notice. I wanted it to be easy.”

“But it’s not, is it?” It didn’t sound like a question.

“No.” You stopped packing and stared into the opening of your duffle.

The silence settled around you again.

You sucked in a breath and looked back up at him. A hollow laugh slipped from you. “You’ve got this face like you’re going to ask me to stay.”

He shook his head. “I wouldn’t do that to you.”

Abandoning your packing, you strode towards the foot of the bed.

“But you want to?”

He nodded reluctantly.

“Oh,” you breathed.

“You deserve this job, you really do. You’ve worked so hard. I would never even try to take that away from you.”

You nodded.

“But I don’t what to leave things unsaid.”

“What things?” you asked almost nervously.

“How we feel about each other.”

“You know, sometimes things left unsaid are better. Leave it up to the imagination.” You prayed your panic didn’t show.

“(Y/N), I love you.”

“Love you too, bud,” you dismissed.

“No,” he said exasperatedly, “I mean, I’m in love with you.”

“Oh.” You moved a stray hair away from your face. “Well, I…” your leg bounced nervously as you avoided eye contact. “I should really finish packing.”

“Come on, (Y/N). Talk to me.”

“Why are you doing this now?” You busied your hands with folding. “We’ve known each other for years, but the moment I start to move on, that’s when you decide it’s the right time to confess your feelings for me?”

“Hey, this isn’t all on me. You didn’t tell me either.”

“I had good reason not to.”

“Care to share?” He crossed his arms and walked up to your side.

“There were really only two ways it could go, if I told you. Option one, I tell you. You don’t feel the same. We both pretend that nothing has changed, but it has, and it’s always at least a little weird.”

“And option two?”

“I tell you. You do feel the same. We go out. We have fun.”

“We always do.”

“I’m not finished. Maybe it goes really well. Maybe we stay together for years, get a dog. But then we get sick of each other.”

“I could never.”

“We start getting on each other’s nerves. One of does something unbelievably stupid and the other can’t forgive them. We learn to hate each other. We can’t even stand to be in the same room together. So we break up. You get Leonard, he always liked you better. I get the dog; she always liked me better.”

“Are dog’s going to be a girl?”

“Yes, they pee on things less. You’re missing the point.”

“No, I’m not.” He took a deep breath. “What makes you think we’ll break up.”

“Experience.” You shoved a shirt a little too forcefully into your bag.

“(Y/N).” He took both of your hands in his and gently tugged you to stand in front of him. “We are not your parents.”

“I know. It’d be weird if we were. Not to mention a little creepy.” You turned your face toward the ceiling and sucked in a breath. “I know this all sounds like crazy over thinking, but how many relationships have you had that didn’t end with a break up? Because I for one haven’t had any and you are one of the most important people in my life, Jim, I couldn’t deal with hating you. I couldn’t deal with you not being in my life.”

“You’re gonna have to do a lot more than break up with me to get me out of your life.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

[ayatcs]

tagged

RULES: Always post the rules. Answer the questions asked, then write 11 new ones. Tag 11 people to answer your questions, as well as the person who tagged you.

tagged by @shuujaye tysm ily

What’s your Blood type? be specific, is it Rh+ or Rh-? A+ or A- i guess but more likely A+

What languages do you speak? fluently finnish and english, less fluently french and swedish

What is ketchup? (this is not a stupid question. ‘cause ketchup can mean several different things in my country and if you mess up, you’d be eating black colored burger.) saucey tomato thing

Do you think you’re religious or spiritual? neither but i believe in some kind of higher power (not a spirit nor a celestial being but just?? a force?? something??)

Ever watch a concert LIVE? several orchestras, also 5sos!!

Most disgusting thing you’ve ever tasted? propably boogers (when i was like 4 idK)

An interesting fact about your family linage? maybe bloodline history, name meaning history, anything! (if you can’t think of any, just a funny thing your family did.) from my dad’s side we used to be burgeoise/middle class

Do you cook? If so, how do you rate your cooking? no, absolutely not. tho i can do tasty sandwiches & toast but that’s it. -2/5

Do you play any instruments? the guitar, but nowadays not that much anymore

What jobs have you done? none, but during our TET-weeks i was at our local newspaper (Itä-Savo) andd at a book store

What’s the story behind your real name (given name)? my dad was a really big fan of alyssa milano....... :)

my questions:

If you have any tattoos, describe them. If not, would you like to have one? What kind?

Favourite thing about the country you were born in?

Favourite meme from the 2000′s (e.g. numa numa, adding “le” before pronouns/nouns in general, one does not simply walk into mordor etc)

Was there something you were supposed to do today?

Favourite sport? Are you a sporty person in general?

Any allergies?

The most ridiculous childhood dream you had?

Do you believe in karma?

Liquorice or salty liquorice?

Do you have any memories from before the age of three?

Turtles or frogs?

Tagging (if u wanna do): @piipstahuuv, @buttercupcannon, @katryh

[wumbo-boi-blog]

9/13/19

Hello World! It’s been a long ass time, and for that I’m sorry. I fell behind on writing for a few days and then I just kept getting busy so this got put on the back burner, but I’m back! Here’s a (somewhat) brief synopsis of every day since I wrote last...

8/30 - Went over to Parker’s house and drank for the first time! It was ok. His roommate got supper drunk which was amusing. I stayed the night. 

8/31 - There was a home game (1st one of the season) and Parker went to that while I went back to my dorm and listened to the game. I ended up feeling kinda sick and stuff, so I took a nap in the middle of the game lmao. Later Parker’s dad took us out to supper and I had a massive pretzel. Later that night I asked parker to go get me some allergy meds and some ice cream, which he kindly supplied. I then passed out for 12 hrs!

9/1 - Mostly just hung out in my dorm and did a little bit of homework. I called all of my parents and told them about my first week of classes. It was nice to tell them about it.

9/2 - It was labor day so I didn’t have anything to do, and my roommate was still out for the weekend. I did more drawing homework, cleaned up a lil, and went on a nice walk around campus with Parker. I read him some letters I had written for him and we talked a bit about marriage and shit. I gave him a gold turtle pin as a token of my love or whatever. We crossed paths with a fat raccoon and a kid showed us a  ~ magic trick ~ where he split a stick using his forehead. College is wack. All in all a good day. 

9/3,4,5 - I can’t remember much from these days. Mostly just doing class work and shit. I had planned to go home the coming weekend so I was trying to get as much done as possible before I went. I spent a shit ton of time in the studio on Wednesday night and had a great time with the buses (I did not have a great time). I hoped on a bus thinking that it would take me to one of two places close to my dorm, and I’d just get off at whichever stop came first. Neither of them did. I rode the whole route for like 30 min and got off one stop from where I had originally gotten on. I hadn’t eaten supper yet, and it was 9:50. The dining halls close at 10, and I was 10min away from my dorm. I managed to stop by a little shop and get a sandwich 5 min before they closed, and I angrily walked my way home. I sat in the common room, ate my sandwich, and then promptly returned to my room and fell asleep after a shitty 16hr day. Thursday I just spent more time in the studio getting shit done.

9/6 - I didn’t have class until noon so I spent my morning packing and getting laundry done before I went home for the weekend. I tried to get the washers to work but they wouldn’t take cash or debit, so I had to download an app, put a minimum of $10 worth of credits into it, and THEN I could start my laundry. I was going to eat breakfast while my clothes were being washed, but the dining hall closed right when I got there, and I almost had the gate shut on my head. Instead, I went to my room, read the book Parker let me borrow, and had some granola bars. When my laundry was done I went to put it in the dryers, only for the dryers to not fucking work. I drug my still wet clothes up 4 flights of stairs and got to let everything air dry in my room. I went to class, came back, folded as much as I could, ate some shitty dining hall food, folded the rest of my clothes, got my bags, found my car, and headed out. On my way back home I happened across a dinky little town called Stanhope that apparently has ‘watermelon days’ every year in July. I took a bit of a scenic route compared to the interstate and I greatly enjoyed my tiny bit of isolation. I made it home just before 4, talked to my dad for a bit, refueled my car, got groceries, and made it back in time for some pork burgers for supper! Afterwards Chance and I talked about movies and shit for a long as time before we finally picked out a movie for family movie night. We ended up watching Heathers, and after that we all went to bed.

9/7 - The next morning my dad got the whole house donuts, and he and I went to the farmers market to pick up eggs and banana bread. Upon returning home he gave me a whole bunch of art stuff for me to use, and I packed it all into a little leather messenger bag he gave me. So now I have an art bag! I worked briefly on some of my studio homework, and just hung out at home. I watched netflix briefly and cuddled with my cat for a bit, which was nice. A little before 4 my dad and stepmom left for a concert, leaving me alone in the house. At 4 I headed over to my mom’s and talked about college with my stepdad for a bit. Then my mom came down from taking a shower and we talked further about college stuff. After that we went to supper with my grandparent’s in a nearby town. When we returned home I got to pop open my senior yearbook that my mom had picked up for me. It mentioned some of my big accomplishments of the year, and it felt really nice to be recognized for the hard work I did. When I was done I headed to bed.

9/8 - On Sunday morning my family went to our town’s local flight breakfast at the little airport just outside of town. Idk what it is about mass produced pancakes on a supper old griddle, but they SLAP. I got to see some kids I graduated with and some coworkers too. After breakfast I made energy bites for a while, and around mid-afternoon we went to my grandparent’s house. My grandma had made me scotcharoos and rice krispie treats which was really sweet. We got to check out a room in the basement that my grandparents had redone, and it looks pretty good! We also got to look at some old pictures my grandma was going through. After that we all returned upstairs to watch NASCAR and talk about everything under the sun. When suppertime was rolling around, we returned home so my mom could get started on the spaghetti. After supper was done and stuff was being cleaned up, I packed my stuff up and got ready for the 2hr drive back. I listened to the Heathers musical soundtrack and now I can’t stop listening to it. Whoops. When I got back I started the 2 block ‘trek’ back to my room with 2 bags and a heavy laundry basket full of snacks because I ain’t no bitch who takes two trips. I should’ve taken two trips. I had to take a break 3 times before I got to my room. It’s important to note that while I was walking down the hall to my room a guy stopped me and told me to vote for him as treasurer and another guy for hall president (which I did). As I finally made it into my room and set down all of my shit, I realized I couldn’t really move my arms. I ended up asking Parker if he could come help me unpack, which he kindly did, and I repaid him with some energy bites. We sat and talked a little bit about our weekends and the coming weekend, and then we parted ways and went to bed.

9/9 - Waking up for class was a bitch but class was alright when I got there. I didn’t do much other than attempt to catch up on the homework I didn’t do over the weekend for my studio.

9/10 - Tuesday was pretty ehh. I wore a super cute outfit and got complimented on it by a lot of people which was really nice. I would’ve had a supper shitty day without it, and I truly appreciated it. I was freaking out a lil all day because I hadn’t completed a drawing yet that was due the next day, so I spent a few hours working on that. I went to my studio lecture and had a small panic attack and a bit of an identity crisis. I also thought heavily about if I’m actually capable, worthy, and skilled enough to be and do what I want to be. That was fun. I was finally able to calm myself down enough to go eat quick, finish up my drawings, and then go visit Parker. It was really nice to see him again and it really helped just being with him for a lil bit. I returned to my dorm, showered, and went to bed.

9/11 - It was pretty rainy and gross all day, but I luckily missed most of the rain and stuff. My studio took a bit of a toll on me mentally. I guess I hadn’t realized just how stressed I was and that I really wasn’t giving myself a break. For the past week I had been stuck on a ‘if I don’t stop working I’ll die’ kind of mindset. I broke down a little in class which was great. It doesn’t help that it’s my period week either. It was basically just my eyes constantly dripping tears and me being unable to stop it without going somewhere to cry for a bit (which wasn’t an option). This carried on until like the last 10 minutes of my next class (so 1.5 hrs of crying). After class I went to lunch, went back to my dorm to do homework, and went to the College of Design to work on a sketch for like an hour. I couldn’t focus so I said fuck it, went and got myself some half priced sushi from hyvee + some other little things, returned to my dorm, and watched Natural Born Killers. I honestly had a really nice night just sitting for a bit and relaxing briefly. When the movie was over I showered and went to bed.

9/12 - On Thursday I had a plan for the whole day + Friday. I was determined to get everything on my list started at the time I had listed, and finnish everything around the time I wanted to be done with it. I got up and got breakfast at 8:30, had class at 9, lunch at 11, did math homework at 11:30, went to class at noon, did more homework in the CoD, worked on a sketch there, went to my lecture at 3:20, and had a meeting at 4:30. My meeting got over at like 4:50, and I booked it back to my dorm as I could see a storm coming and I didn’t have a rain coat or umbrella. I made it back to my dorm shortly after it had started sprinkling, and had 2 min to spare before the heavens opened up and it POURED. I took a lil shower so I could keep on track with my schedule without getting off track.I went to supper at 6ish, left for the CoD at 6:30, and made it there a little before 7! I had snacks packed for when I would inevitably get hungry, and was fully prepared to finish my first sketchbook assignment. I left the CoD at like 9:30 and returned to my dorm at 10ish. I had another snack and started a book my dad had given me before I went to bed.

9/13 - Today I attempted to wake up at 6:30. This did not work, and so I slept in until 7. I didn’t have a class until noon, but I wanted to spend the morning in the studio. I went to breakfast with a former classmate, and then got to the CoD just after 8am. I spent from 8-12:20 working on sketches and taking little breaks every hour or so. I received an email at like 10am from my math prof. telling us class was canceled, which was fucking stellar. At around 12:50 I met up with my dad to go out and eat sushi. I had a pretty good time talking with him and the food was spectacular as always. After that we took a brief trip to the Earl May across the street before he dropped me off at my dorm. I had hoped to get back to work on studio stuff, but I decided not to since I had already done that all morning. I instead went to the Club Fest thing held in a building near me and I signed up to hear more about a bunch of clubs such as birding, film making, theatre, and even fencing! I’m excited to join a club and actually meet people. After that I went back to my dorm to grab some cash so I could then return to that same building and do a pottery painting workshop! It was Stranger Things themed, and I got to paint a mug with some cute lil shapes on it. I’ll have to wait until next week to see what the finished product looks like, but I’m excited. While I was painting I got to talk to a couple of girls next to me who seemed cool. We didn’t exchange info so I’ll probs sadly never see them again. Oh well. After painting I returned to my dorm again and read a couple books on the outside steps leading into the building. When I felt like I had had enough, I went to supper and had some cereal. I came back to my dorm and listened to music for a little bit and sang to myself and just did fun weird shit that I can’t do when someone else is here. I then showered, and started writing this big ass post! I’ve currently been writing for like 2 hrs, but It’s so worth it. It feels really nice to finally have this crossed off my to do list and to just write about stuff. I really do enjoy writing, and I think I’ve been needing this. I’m kinda figuring out how to balance work with play in a healthy way that works for me, and I think I’ve partially gotten the hang of it. I’m hoping to finish most, if not all of my homework sometime on Sunday so I can give myself time to relax tomorrow. I’m so ready to let loose a little and have some fun. I think everyone else is too lol. It’s like 11:52pm and it seems like everyone in my dorm is still up and doin shit. It’s fine with me though. I’m ready for a batshit crazy gameday. I’ll likely catch y’all up to speed on Sunday. Until then, Bye for now!

[tribuarganzuela]

An afternoon with Finnish activists, mothers and educators

After our institutional interviews, it was time to get in touch with more informal realities. We wanted to meet people who, like us, are closer to the social movements than to the institution. Thanks to Lotta Meri Pirita Tenhunen, a researcher specializing in political communities and a Finnish activist based in Madrid, who got us into contact  with several people. We were lucky enough to spend an afternoon getting to know other realities and other glimpses about raising and caring for kids in Helsinki.

The first stop was in the cafe of a central bookstore. We were meeting Warda Ahmed, cartoonist, activist, cultural worker and feminist, and Atlas Saarikoski activist and feminist journalist. And both, moreover, mothers. We had a coffee listening to their views about the current situation for people like them who are caring in Helsinki, with more than one child, aware of and active in the political situation and with cultural interests and temporary jobs.

Some of the most powerful issues we addressed were:

The cuts are affecting the maintenance at home policies and the day care quality

Currently, the home stay money allows you to stay up to three years caring for your child at home. However, the achievements of the seventies feminists fights are now in danger because the conservative government is calling it into question. There is talk of the transition to new benefits such as the Icelandic model (which contemplates 6 months per parent and 6 months enjoyed by both), which, whether or not they have positive aspects, are a reduction of the current three years. Another backlash of the neoliberalism here In Finland.

Since the beginning of the crisis, the cuts have not stopped hitting. The current government wants to justify the reduction of aid to care for children at home with the twisted argument that the people who benefit from this assistance are mostly migrants and excluded sectors, to whom a job would serve to "turn them into functional citizens". The result is the impoverishment of the parents, especially mothers, since the type of work she can access (the increase in the unemployment rate is a pressing reality in Finland) will have low salary and conditions. There is a whole ongoing debate in Finland, even within feminist currents, on this issue.

The changes are happening very fast and the cuts have not stopped coming. And, most dangerous, they often do so in the name of the liberation of women. Strategies of the right wing are to disguise the cuts policies in the name of feminism and of protecting poor and migrant women (they can be at home). This upper class argument shows its worst face against minorities and poor people.

The decrease in the quality of care and education services is another expression of the cuts and something that is very worrying is the increasing of the ratio of the day care groups.

-Isolation and (Not) Equal Homes

"Staying at home gives you some kind of freedom", recognizes Atlas, who is about to have her third child, "but it also isolates you. "In spite of the wide range of care options that Finnish families have (home policies to take it home, nursery, kindergarten, Pre-School, alternatives between Nursery or take it at home, Family Caffés, or cultural activities at the parks, specially in summer, where free lunch is given), the phenomenon of isolation continues to occur, especially among people who decide to raise at home. That argument has also been used in a twisted way by the government, who argues that with less help, people will leave the house and integrate more.

Therefore, the vertigo of staying at home and of not being able to do anything but caring and somehow being disconnected from the world is just as present among Finns as among the inhabitants of southern Europe, as we could see in the first part of our research. A lot of mothers are scared of being at home because of this tendency.

Nor do labor policies help in this regard since, although the law protects working mothers, employers look at age and reproductive possibility as a determining factor.

Another problem shared between mothers in northern and southern Europe is the question of households or non-egalitarian couples. The issue of permissibility of permits and non-transferability is also in the debate of the Finnish Feminist Party -as we are told by Warda, one of its leaders- who is studying the program of measures of the Swedish Feminist Party to try to do their adaptation to Finnish reality.

Atlas thinks it is fundamental that both parents could spend at least two years ideally

so that the implication was more balanced. Regarding the symbolic asymmetry between genders in relation to care, it is worth it to look at the cultural stigma of childcare for Finnish man (with respect to his Scandinavian companions). The fact that the term "Swedish Dad" exists referring to a man dedicated to childcare and, therefore, or implicitly, not entirely masculine, speaks for itself. We say goodbye to Atlas and Warda, in a very grateful mood. And wishing luck to Warda! Next year there will be municipal elections in Helsinki and the Feminist Party will take power!

Afterwards, we were fortunate to be invited for coffee at Solja Kovero's house, a philosopher and activist and her two companions, Anki Sievänen, experienced teacher at Kindergartens and Heidi Kangas, former Kindergarten teacher, and now university student to be Secondary Teacher. And Punni, Heidi's daughter! We were greeted with a huge tray of Karelia, the typical Finnish cake, made by Anki.

With them we addressed the issue of education in particular. They gave us a review of the modalities and the current conditions of Kindergarten, institutions that they both know very well. Kindergarten is not totally free but mostly affordable because it depends on the parents’ income. On the other hand, Private DayCare is very expensive (if you are not registered you do not have the right to DayCare). Pre-schools are free (from 3 to 6) and they were created in the seventies.

The question of the cutbacks related to education came out immediately. Anki also told us about the increasing ratio per class and the lack of staff. In general terms, the quality of education is getting worse (less space, less activities) because of the decreasing of resources. Although, public kindergartens are still great places and people trust in them, although this trend is changing now because of the lack of resources. The middle class is changing now, looking for something special such as innovative pedagogy.

Heidi told us about her experience about being a young mother of a baby (Punni is one and a few months) still studying. She does not receive allowance or extra benefits at the university. Punni is now in DayCare, but she still needs help from some friends, as her partner is working full time. Here in Finland, it's more common that people rely on relatives than on friends.

We were also talking about the issue of (Not) Equal Homes. In 99% of the cases, the women are the ones who stay at home for a long time and also women are more engaged with education, indeed it's a challenge for Finnish society to get over this gender gap. Anki and Heidi complaints about the same idea that everybody has about Finland, but this is a superficial view. "Finland is not so equal. The glass ceiling is also an issue". Especially with the new conservative politicians putting more and more pressure on women (pressure to be mothers, to be the perfect mother, to parenting as a way of consuming) with their conservative culture. "The new right wing (now in government) is the most horrible government for women”.

For all these questions, Heidi thinks it could be crucial to develop more solidarity between parents to fight against isolation; more flexibility to do things collectively and imagination to create a collective childcare system (it's not even easy in big cities).

For Anki it is important to say how much time the kids spend at Kindergarten (8 or 9 hours) and to develop special policies to avoid the creation of ghettos. Both of them agree on how city planning is a deciding factor in avoiding segregation. Cheap houses are in certain areas, far from the center, where it's difficult to mix. This favors racist structure in everyday life, which allows discrimination and makes Helsinki a less friendly city.

We finished our day exhausted but happy to have gotten to know all these warm and interesting women! Thanks to all.