#but can we talk abt accordion guys face

[axther]

(1/2) Ghost Anon: May I get a bnha matchup? I’m Vicente, a 4’11” pan trans-guy, who’s 18 years old and in college for art! I adore cats, halloween, video games, & death metal! My MBTI is INFP-T! I have trouble befriending others irl because I’m MAD standoffish & have an abrasive personality but for those I‘m close to I do whatever I can to cheer em up when they’re down! I have history with martial arts (abt 5/6 years) I LOVE sparring and get a thrill from fakin people out and landin a solid hit!

fuckkkk I’m sorry this is late… I am one (1) dumbass. Also under the cut for length bc I kept on deleting it and starting over and before I knew it the first matchup was four pages long (in the end it was 9 pages long)

#1 is…Tamaki! 

Okay so!!! 

We all know that Tamaki freaks out easily 

And let’s say there’s a meetup for young, promising students

Mirio and Neijre are thriving 

But Tamaki is stuck in a corner trying to not get noticed

 He’s panicking 

And then he sees you from across the room 

You look pissed as all hell 

Crossing your arms and watching three other students brag about their exploits 

He notices that you look like your gradually getting more and more annoyed 

Eventually, you huff and walk away, and Tamaki realises that you’ve got something perched on your shoulder

 He takes a bit of a look and sees that it’s a skeletal cat, walking back and forth and clearly agitated. 

You sit on a chair at one of the semi-fancy, plastic tablecloth tables, about two feet away from Tamaki 

He’s clearly ‘??’ and nervous as hell that he pissed you off

until you start talking 

‘What’re you doin’?’ 

Tamaki’s confused as all get out 

And it’s clear that he’s promptly terrified 

Until you glance at him out of the corner of your eyes 

And the cat is staring at him with hollow eye sockets, tilting its head 

And you say ‘You look lonely.’ 

Tamaki flushes bright red 

You noticed him??? 

Did he do something obvious? 

Was he pissing you off?

Did lonely people piss you off?

Did he make you feel bad???

You shrug at his silence, and though he can’t see it, you’re kinda hurt 

It’s not like you want to actually scare anybody (besides villains). 

So imagine your surprise when he manages to pipe up 

‘Wh-wh-what’s your…quirk…?’ 

It’s less than a whisper, but you catch it, and you look over with a raised eyebrow 

‘Death.’ You look away. ‘Psychopomp. Angel of Death. Grim Reaper. Whatever you wan’ to call it.’ 

Tamaki baulks 

He didn’t even know that quirks that severe existed

You’re kinda staring in the opposite direction and he can tell that his silence is definitely not helping 

But he’s almost in awe 

He’s heard of people with quirks like Wendigo, Reanimation, and Bodily Manipulation that had to be shelved away lest something happen and they use their quirks for evil

So he’s a bit confused as to why you’re allowed out and about 

But he’s most curious 

In fact, he’s very very curious

So he blinks up at you and takes a big gulp and closes his eyes tight 

‘Th…that’s cool…’ 

He did it!! 

Internally he’s celebrating like crazy because he managed to get it going!! 

He’s got this!! 

But then you just frown and look a bit angrier 

So then it all comes to a stop in Tamaki’s head 

And he eyes the cat, who’s nuzzling your neck 

And Tamaki decides to shoot his shot 

‘Who’s…the cat?’ 

You look back at him, clearly surprised 

You figured that your quirk scared him, with how he looked ready to die himself when he said it was cool, so you’re a bit confused. 

‘Custos. M’ familiar.’ 

Tamaki is definitely more curious now 

He wasn’t sure what to ask next 

But then Custos jumped from your shoulder 

You two are staring at Custos, kneading Tamaki’s lap

The shoujo gods are watching over you, really

 But then you look away again with a blush and a mumble of ‘I guess she likes you.’ 

Tamaki’s playing with her funny paws 

And there’s a second where he messes with it wrong, and the paw turns sideways, and then claws just appear out of nowhere until he fixes it again 

He’s talking to Custos and having a grand old time 

When you get out of the chair and plop down next to Tamaki 

And Tamaki’s starting to freak out again 

Did it seem like he was ignoring you? 

Was he being rude? 

He didn’t know what you were doing when you plucked Custos out of Tamaki’s hands until you murmured ’watch this!’ 

Then you  s t r e t c h  Custos 

She’s mewing happily, clearly enjoying it 

But Tamaki can see Custos’ spine literally separating, like a weird accordion 

You stop, and laugh when Custos bounces left and right, trying to get you to do it again 

And you nudge Tamaki, and he’s in awe

’It’s like givin’ her a kitty deep massage.’ 

Tamaki nods mutely, a little blush on his face 

Through this, you two develop a full-blown conversation 

And it’s going great! 

Tamaki’s genuinely surprised 

But then he hears muffled squealing 

And at first, he’s ’???’ 

But then he looks over to his right to see Neijre smothering her own cheer

And Mirio’s got a big ol’ grin and he’s giving a thumbs up 

Tamaki’s ready to EXPLODE 

But then you call his name 

And he jumps again but looks at you this time 

And you follow his original line of sight 

And almost immediately, you reserve yourself again 

Tamaki realises that the pissed-off demeanour was a reflex

You look at him, clearly taken off guard, and go ’Huh?’ 

Tamaki realises that he said it out loud, and smacks a hand to his mouth 

You both look shocked 

Tamaki’s sure that he’s messed up the entire thing and that you’re never going to want to talk to him again 

But then you give a bit of a sad smile before nodding 

’Yeah, I guess.’ 

Tamaki’s heart breaks at the tone of your voice 

He feels a weight in his stomach 

Custos begins rubbing herself across your face and purring, trying to comfort you 

And before Tamaki’s anxiety can catch up, he’s got his phone out and has yours so you two can exchange numbers 

He doesn’t have time to think over it or regret it before Fat Gum shows up for him so he and a couple of other students can train together 

And a different hero, with spikes and hair that hung in their face, shows up for you with several other goth-themed students in tow 

It’s later that night that he thinks back to it all, and he’s covering his face, bright red, and rolling left and right. 

Then, like a death bell, his phone goes off 

He stops rolling and just stares at the contact ’Vincente + Custos’ 

And he’s shaking and hyping himself up and nearly drops his phone three times and he’s near tears 

But he answers with a shaky ’H-Hello?’ 

And he hears Custos mewing a bit 

And then you 

’Hey. Tamaki, right? From the Elites Meetup?’ 

Tamaki takes a deep as fuck breath before speaking again 

’Yes?’ 

Yeah, it sounds like a question, but he’s nervous!! 

And he hears a sigh of relief 

’Cool! This is, uh, V. Vincente.’ 

There’s another moment of silence until you speak up again 

’But I can be whoever you want?’ 

This, too, is a question, but Tamaki doesn’t worry about that 

He hears someone’s vaguely cheering you on (it sounded like a sixteen-year-old, maybe?) 

But his face erupts in red 

’I-Well, that’s…I…’ 

Tamaki can’t really respond 

He’s too busy thinking ’?????!??!??! He’s into me?!??!??!’ 

You kinda sigh, and then say ’Sorry, that was kinda…’ 

And Tamaki starts stammering more over the phone 

It was a bit hard to decipher, but it was something along the line of ’it’s okay’ and ’are you free’ 

(yes, you made sure you were definitely free.) 

#2 is…Bakugou! 

We know this mf does not do anything half-assed 

So when you two are paired together for sparring 

He’s expecting you to have a quirk like Tokoyami’s, where light and darkness are important factors

So he goes blazing in, expecting the light from his explosions to be too much

But you’re just standing there, the fuckin’ cat on your shoulder and looking unbothered! 

It’s pissing him off! 

But then he feels something grab onto his foot 

And he looks down

And he doesn’t know how to describe it 

But it looks like a mix of a big, ripped out fetus and a malnourished child with huge, empty eyesockets and wrinkly, paper white skin and arms that didn’t fit its body 

(look up the messengers from Bloodborne, it’ll make more sense) 

And it’s quietly groaning while holding onto his ankle

And Bakugou tries ripping it off of him

But then another appears

And more and more until there’s a whole crowd around him 

’What the fuck is this?’ He can’t get them off, because, with every one that he shoots off, three takes its place 

And then, at once, they all start dragging him down 

’Hey! You goth fuck! What the fuck are you doing?!’ 

Yet the entire time, you’re unbothered 

And he’s trying to wade out of the tide that pulls him in

And it’s consuming him whole

The ground isn’t the limit anymore, he realises, and he starts panicking 

He’s blasting left and right 

But then he lets out one final yell, and he’s gone 

No one knows where

People have stopped to look, and your teacher gives you a stern look.

‘Bring him back, V.’ 

You only glance his way for a moment before, a couple of yards behind you, Bakugou is spat out 

He’s panting and sweating and looks like he saw hell itself 

You turn your head slightly to look at him, not even bother to uncross your arms. 

And when he looks at you he can only keep eye contact for a moment before lowering his head 

Very very quickly word goes around school

That the dark horse V took down the rowdy rude Bakugou that won the Sports Festival

Bakugou has rarely felt so humiliated 

So he approaches you later that day demanding a rematch

He’s gotten a better grasp of what your quirk is, so he’s certain he can take you on 

But all you do is shrug. 

This! Pisses! Bakugou! Off!!

‘Then no quirks, fucker. You and me and nothing else.’ 

Again, you shrug, and the cat on your shoulder hops of and perches on a nearby open window

Again, Bakugou is sure that he can take you on

You don’t look buff, nor scrawny. You look…moderate? 

Certainly like you wouldn’t blow away in the wind, but that you were more of a cuddler than a fighter 

So when he goes full offensive, he sees you start to lift your right leg and he’s all over it 

He’s thinking ‘dumbass!’ and goes to grab your leg when you switch in mid-air and clock him over the neck with your knee 

You let him get back up

But the rest of the fight he’s getting no mercy 

And he’s completely taken off guard

By the end of it 

He’s beaten and bruised 

Though you’re only a bit better off yourself

He’s pretty sure that some students watched in the middle of it but left near the end 

But either way, he’s been lowkey humbled

He’d never admit it, of course

But he now knows that he can’t underestimate you anymore 

When he takes a second too long to get up, you offer a hand 

And he nearly knocks it away when he looks up at you

And into your eyes

And he realises that it’s you putting yourself out there

You never really talked to anybody, at all

So he takes it 

‘It’s not me being nice’, he tells himself. 

It’s him just taking what is offered 

And he stands up and he’s taller than you 

And when he looks down he notices that hey

You’re kinda cute

So when the silence consumes you both he takes a hand to the back of his head and shoves a hand into his pockets 

‘I, uh…you’re better than I fuckin’ thought. You wanna…eat out sometime?’ 

Your face softens, ever so slightly, and if he squints hard enough he sees you smiling 

(though he would never admit it, he was whipped from there on out.)

#3 is…Midoriya!

When you first meet him he’s absolutely enamoured with your quirk 

It started with Custos 

And then when you started explaining the basics of your quirk 

He’s completely fanboying 

‘Oh my gosh, I didn’t know that quirks could have capabilities like that! To think that you can call on the armies of the dead…that’s incredible! Could I ask more?’ 

He’s a bit like Tamaki, but on a chiller level 

He ends up filling roughly half a notebook on you over the course of the train ride that you two met on 

And he realises that he probably hasn’t even scratched the surface of it 

So he demands (politely) that you guys exchange numbers 

You mention offhand that you don’t have too many friends because of how stand-off-ish you act 

And midoriya rises to the occasion! 

‘I’ll be your friend! Don’t worry! Actually, I have a voucher for some good katsudon at a stand down the road from my house, and it’s the next stop, would you want to come? Not that you have to! It’s just that I really wanna solidify our new friendship, and-’

‘Sure. I’ve got nothin’ better to do.’ 

Midoriya is ready to fly out of his seat with how happy he is!! 

He’s still not terribly used to having a ton of friends, so the fact that he’s expanding his circle, even more, makes him super happy!

You two go to the katsudon stand and Midoriya’s semi-swarmed by a group of old ladies that his mom takes yoga classes with 

And they’re pinching your cheeks with a feel of ‘Oh!! Izuku-Kun is this your friend! Is he your boyfriend? Oh, you two look very cute together! Don’t forget to eat well, Izuku’s friend! Please keep him safe and well!’ 

And to be honest, Midoriya’s not expecting you to take it all too well

He’s ready to shoo them away 

When you just give a really soft, sparkly, anime shoujo smile and take their hand 

‘I will, ma’am. You ca’ count on me.’ 

And Midoriya kinda stares in awe for a moment before one of the shrewder ladies nudges him in the side with a 😏

He’s like ‘!!! I-I-I-I-I-I just met him today! It’s not like that!’ 

And he’s flailing his arms and bright red and the lady is like ‘Uh-huh, sure, that’s what I said about my fourth husband’ 

Either way, the old ladies leave with a call for Midoriya to ask his mother to bring her soba recipe to yoga next Thursday

And he accepts while trying to drag you away from them because the last thing he needs is for the entire neighbourhood to try and be his wingman

So he’s talking with you about your quirk while eating and you two eventually branch of about anything and everything 

And by the time it’s dark Midoriya feels like he’s known you his entire life 

You decide to head out before it gets any darker and he waves as you leave 

He’s got a blush on his face and a lopsided grin 

Because you know what!!

You’re fuckin cute!! And smart, and funny, but you knew when to hold your tongue, and you’ve got a really cool cat, and he thinks that you’re really sweet, and…

And almost immediately, once you’re out of earshot, the chef leans over 

“Your boyfriend, huh?’ 

‘Aughhhh!’ 

@v0mpy