#but because he knows he hurt Cisco deeply and he wants to remind him that he does actually care about him and he didn't hurt him on purpose

[icedteaandoldlace]

So I've seen a couple of old posts that said/implied that Barry was being emotionally manipulative when he convinced Cisco to open a breach to Earth-2 for the first time, and that is just...Not Correct At All, so let's take a second to break down how this situation really goes down:

Barry needs a way to get to Earth-2/get Zoom back to Earth-1 so he can defeat him once and for all, and free the real Jay from his prison and the entire rest of Earth-2 from Zoom's reign of terror.

Cisco is intimidated by his own powers. On one hand, he doesn't really see himself as someone who's capable of doing great things on his own and not just as a way of helping someone else doing bigger, greater things. But on the other hand, he knows that there is a tremendous power inside of him, and he's terrified of taking advantage of that and becoming someone like Reverb or Zoom, who uses that power against innocent people for his own gain.

Barry is aware of Cisco's insecurities regarding his own capabilities, but not of his fear of turning evil.

Barry knows that Cisco isn't having the best time trying to open breaches and failing, and promises him before one attempt that if it doesn't work that time, he will stop asking him to do it.

They discover that Cisco CAN open breaches, but he freaks out and refuses to do it anymore without explanation.

Barry, still needing a breach to Earth-2 and knowing now that Cisco IS capable of making one, goes to talk to Cisco and reassure him that it's okay to be scared, and hopefully persuade him to try again.

During this talk, Cisco reveals what he is actually afraid of. Barry assuages his fear and lets him know that he has faith in him, and that even if Cisco ever does almost go off the deep end, he has a support system that will keep him in check.

After helping Cisco address his fears, Barry asks him if he's ready to try again. Cisco decides that he is.

Cisco THANKS Barry for believing in him, because that's really what he needed—just for someone to believe that he could do something important and not either fail or turn to the dark side.

What DIDN'T happen:

Barry pushing Cisco too hard for selfish reasons with no regard for Cisco's own comfort level, and using "we're your family" to guilt him into doing something that's too much for him to handle. Like, seriously, where the hell did that takeaway come from?

[samanthalightning]

She's Got A Date-EoWells X Allen!reader- Part V

*The GIF is not mine. All rights to the owner*

Part IV

Summary: While you face a relationship dilemma, you must help Barry stop The Mist from coming after your adoptive father. Based on 1x03

Warnings: None

***

You submerged your face in the water on your hands. The coolness temporarily eased the sting in your eyes. You turn off the faucets, you grab some tissues and dab them on your face to dry. You stared at yourself in the mirror; you were starting to look fine. The puffiness of your eyes ease, your eyes are still bloodshot red, but it was better.

It had been hours since that fight happened, and you have washed your face for the hundredth time today. Each time you think about it, you cry despite trying hard not to, and lucky you, it's all you can think about.

You reapplied your lipstick and mascara, and left the restroom. You walked down the hallway to come back to the cortex. You rounded a corner, but your feet quickly halted when a figure popped up to avoid collision.

It was him. You both froze, staring at each other. He could have swore, he saw a flicker of hurt and coldness in your eyes, before you lowered your head down when his stare became intense. This wasn't the first you crossed paths today. It's his building and you work here, though it didn't mean it got easier. It's always awkward and uneasy.

He didn't speak or move, so you figured you would be the one who needs to do it.

"Excuse me," you whispered, walking ahead passing by him.

"Y/N, wait." You stopped in your tracks and formed a fist. Although you didn't turn around. "We need to talk,"

"We already did. There's no need to further discuss it and make it worse." You didn't dare let him respond, and walked away rapidly away from him, not skipping a beat until you reached the cortex.

You quickly took a seat beside Cisco and buried your head on the computer, typing as you finished a report. Your thoughts ran, a sudden furious rage boiling in your veins. You couldn't believe how ironic it is that earlier he didn't want to talk about it, and now he does. It just infuriates you so hard, so hard and murder him with your bare hands.

"Woah, woah, you okay?" Cisco's voice pulled you out of your spiral.

You paused, fingertips ghosting the keyboard. You didn't even realize you were typing audibly, angrily. "Yeah. Just itching to get our meta," you said.

"Okay. Whatever you say," he replied, obviously suspicious and not an ounce convinced. None of them were if you're being honest. Especially Barry. He was very concerned, but it occurred to him that this might be regarding your mystery boyfriend, so he reluctantly kept his distance.

Wells came back. You can feel his eyes boring at you. You pretended to be oblivious, but it bothered you. Deeply.

Abruptly, a ping coming from the computer echoed in the room. It was the analysis on the toxin. Cisco was quick to call Barry and Caitlin, who God knows where to come to the cortex immediately.

They arrived moments later.

"Yo, check this out."

You all huddled up in front of the TV, waiting for someone to explain the result.

"We have identified the toxin," Wells said, clicking the screen of his tablet. The analysis results popped up on the screen.

"Hydrogen Cyanide?" Barry's brows furrowed.

"Well, what's interesting is what mixed in with the cyanide— a sedative," he added.

Your head cocked to the side, confused more than ever. You're no Caitlin, but that sounded odd. Never in your life have you heard those chemical compounds being mixed before— hell, even in being in the same sentence.

You turned to Barry to ask. His demeanor changed from being in serious thought to his eyes lighting up in recognition. A hand flew to his forehead, turning to Caitlin.

"The night of the explosion— find out if anyone was executed," he ordered.

Caitlin nodded and headed to the nearest computer.

"Why?" Wells asked, beating you to it.

"That sedative was given to criminals on death row before they go into the gas chamber, and breathe in cyanide," he explained.

That was one hell of a fact.

"There was someone executed— Kyle Nimbus," Caitlin informed.

A tab of his background and records popped up. And yup, he does look like someone crazy. Bald, pale skin, huge bags under his eyes. Just add a crooked smile and he could be the missing son of the Grinch and Penguin.

"That's him," Barry confirmed.

"He was a hit man for the Darbinyan crime family. They turned on him and testified. Judge Teresa Howard was the judge at his trial. She sentenced him to death."

It makes sense why he was hell bent on killing these people. The irony of his life though. Karma really is a bitch.

"He said there's one more on his list. Check the arrest records; who caught him, that could be his next attack," he walked towards her, and you trailed after him, dumbfounded.

There was too much information all at once, and Barry's the only one who's putting two and two together as fast as he runs.

You watched as Caitlin's eyes widened in horror. Her face blanched, glancing up at you and Barry, as if she had seen a ghost. It made you a little worried and anxious. The pit of your stomach knotting, as you swallowed thickly. Whatever information she got a hold of isn't good.

"Barry, the lead detective..."

Your heart dropped. Your mind quickly thinks of one person: Joe. Your thoughts ran wildly. You refused to believe it's him.

"Cait, who is it?" You asked, shakily.

"It's Joe."

You let out a gasp, panic surged through you. It felt like the world collapsed, your worry escalating into another level.

Next thing you knew, Barry was on his cell, both of you pacing back and forth, while he tried to reach Joe. Each time he took his phone off his ear, not able to reach him, he grew more frustrated. And so were you.

"He's not answering,"

"Call Eddie, maybe he knows," you suggested.

He took your advice and dialled him. You held your breath, anxiously waiting for the end of the ringing noise from Barry's phone.

"Eddie!" You immediately moved to Barry's side. "Hey, do you know where Joe went? He's not picking up his cell."

You placed your ears near and listened carefully. He paused, then said he didn't know.

"Eddie, it's really important I speak to him. I need to know where he went." Barry pleaded, evidently desperate.

Eddie must have picked it up. You heard an audible sigh from him through the phone. Eddie said he's in Iron Heights. That must have been why he's not picking up.

"Thanks, Eddie." Barry ended the call, and went to the team. "He's in Iron Heights, he's in Iron Heights because of me,"

Your brows drew together. If the toxins results didn't make sense, so is Barry right now. "What? Why?"

"I'll explain later," he said, running off to Caitlin.

She developed an antidote from the toxin, in case Barry didn't make it in time to stop Nimbus. Barry put on his suit, and faster than a blink of eye, he sped off, leaving a red streak of lights behind and a gust of strong wind blowing through your hair.

You took a seat and behind a computer to do your designated job. You pray to God Barry gets there before Nimbus does.

"Barry, I pulled up the specs on Iron Heights prison with maximum security, but I think I can talk you through breaking in there," he said, as he took a seat beside you.

You chortled, shaking your head. Your brother is probably doing the same thing right now. Cisco looked at you confused and a little offended.

"No bother. I've been figuring out how to break in that place since I was 11,"

Damn right he was. He used to get in trouble with Joe because of that, and you'll get a warning to think twice before pulling the same stunt. Barry still continuously, persistently did it. Eventually, he got older and no one has to call Joe about a minor trying to sneak in to see his Dad.

In a snap, it dawned on you. That's what Barry meant. Your Dad was the reason Joe was in Iron Heights. As to why, you wondered. Joe never once visited the man; he strongly believes that your Dad killed your Mom, it doesn't make sense why he would want to see him after all those years.

Your thoughts were pushed in the back of your mind, seeing Barry was inside the prison. You all cowered in silence, anxiety prickling your very existence. Your heart beating fast like you ran a hundred miles, you fingers were trembling. You took them off the keyboard, and hid them under the desk, clenching and unclenching it repeatedly.

You tried to keep it together, itching to hear Barry's voice, saying Joe's fine. You already lost your parents, you can't lose another one.

You felt a warm, large hand on your formed fist, fingers wrapping it securely with a squeeze. Your head shot up to the man in glasses beside you, stunned. Not that you just had the biggest fight ages ago, but your colleagues are literally sandwiching the two of you.

He gave a soft, assuring smile. And you appreciated it deeply. You opened your palm, intertwining your fingers with his. The differences were set aside for a moment, as you hold on to him for dear life.

"Joe's stable," Barry spoke.

The weight on your chest was lifted off. You relaxed for a second only to be reminded that there's still a meta-human on the loose that desperately needs some ass-kicking.

According to Barry, Nimbus transformed into a mist again, and Caitlin advised him to stay away, do not breathe him I'm. As weird as that sounds, it was the only way to avoid inhaling cyanide, and he might not be so lucky again.

But it was very obvious that it wasn't easy; the man is literally air.

"Guys, I don't think this is helping me,"

"You can't fight him, Barry. Just..." Caitlin paused to think. "...keep him coming at you, that should sap his strength."

Wells nodded in agreement. "Yes. Gas is the least stable form of matter— this meta-human will not be able to stay in this mist form, his particles will need to reform."

Barry ran. He ran farther and farther away from the prison. He takes quick stops, before running again.

Your eyes peered over to Caitlin's computer to check on his vitals. His heart rate elevated a bit, but everything was fine. Although he wasn't updating or saying anything it's starting to worry you.

Wells, clearly worried, leaned over and grabbed the mic. "Barry?" He called him. There was only silence on the other end. "Barry?" He called again, louder and firmer.

"We win,"

You all sighed with relief. Your eyes fluttered close, as you lean back into your seat and roll your head back. You squeezed him, you looked at him as a grateful smile spread across your face.

Barry brought Nimbus to S.T.A.R Labs, and left to go to the hospital. You stayed behind to see how well you did with makeshift prison, and get some satisfaction by watching him go crazy to find a way out.

You stood by the entrance of the pipeline with the team, watching the door slide down in front of a very angry Kyle Nimbus, pounding on the glass, constantly morphing into gas to escape his cell. The dummy didn't actually think you'd seal it.

"So, we just have to get used to working above a makeshift prison," Caitlin commented.

"Yup," you replied.

It's surreal. You can't still quite grasp the fact that you built a prison, and it's weird to see someone actually imprisoned inside. He deserved it, yes, but it's still weird.

Everyone turned to shuffle back to the cortex. Cisco pulled Caitlin aside. It looks like they have something to talk about, and by the look on Cisco's face, it's probably serious.

Your eyes flickered to Wells, who was surprisingly staring at you too. You locked eyes, realizing things had wind down— Nimbus is apprehended, and no meta-human to worry about for the time being. You don't know what's going to happen, where you both stand; if the relationship still exists, but one thing is for certain: it was time to address it and deal with it.

He tilted his head to the side, gesturing to go outside, before leaving the room.

You followed him, trailing behind him in the hallway. You dreaded every step you took, you heart racing fast under your ribs, and for many times today, your stomach churned, nervous.

You didn't know where he was leading you. You never really wandered around this area. The hallway is like a never ending maze; just no twist and turns. It was long and quiet and dark. If he was some dude, you would think that he's luring you to kill you.

You were about to ask him where you both were going, but he stopped. You both stood in front of a door. Nothing special about it, just a door. He twisted the knob and opened it. He took a step aside to let you in first and you obliged.

The lights automatically turned on, shedding lights on the room contents. Shelves containing boxes and some other covered things lined up across the room. It's another storage room. The dust isn't disgustingly obvious yet, but it hasn't been touched in a while. Probably since last year.

"We have another storage room?" You raised an eyebrow.

"Yes. This was used when we were building the accelerator," he explained, closing the door behind him.

This is not the most ideal place to talk, but it's secluded and quiet and hidden. Given the fight earlier, all those three are a must.

You spun around to him, folding your arms, awkwardly waiting for him to speak first.

"So?" He started.

"So?"

He exhaled sharply, pursing his lips. "I thought about what you said, and..." He trailed off. A lump forming in your and you gulped in anticipation, watching him be lost for words. It was like those heart stopping moments in class just before your teacher passed your papers, scared of what your mark would be, except on this one, there's only two of you. This would not just affect the future, but potentially break your heart.

He stammered. " I don't— I don't want to lose you. I love you and you were right." Your mouth went dry. You were rendered speechless. Not a single word you could utter, staring at him in shock. You didn't expect that one. Scared that might not convince you, he added, "I mean it. I couldn't risk losing you."

Emotions barrelling through you. You kept it together, not wanting to broke down immediately.

"What about the press?"

"They'll leave us alone eventually," he answered.

"Your haters?"

He chuckled lightly. "They'll forget about it."

"And Joe?" The smile on his face faded, aware of the seriousness of that name.

"We'll deal with it. But I'm pretty sure he'll be happy for you,"

You lowered your head, looking down at your feet.

"Y/N?"

You glanced up, your demeanor stern as you looked into his eyes. "Are you sure? You might be just saying this right now, but you might regret—"

"The only thing I will regret is letting you walk away. I lost a lot of things last year, and I don't want you to be part of it. You mean so much to me,"

Your heart was cracked open. You were in awe of his declaration. Today was a tough one, and it will be on some days, but you certainly knew you would be a damn fool to let him go.

Although, it doesn't hurt to rile him up a bit. You maintain a stoic expression for a period of time, which ended very soon because you couldn't help it anymore.

"Damn it," you hissed.

You went to him, cupped his cheek and pulled his lips to yours. He responded quickly. His lips move passionately against yours, pouring all emotions into the kiss. Your stomach flutters in realization how vulnerable and raw this moment is. It was like he's opening up and he didn't have to say anything. Everything disappeared for a while. He clutched your arm, pressing you closer to this warmth.

You pulled away reluctantly, panting. You leaned your forehead against his.

"I love you," you whispered to him.

"I love you too,"

He drew closer to kiss you again, but you withdrew. You gritted your teeth, looking at him nervously.

"I think we should tell them tonight,"

***

Uh Oh. How do you think they'll react?

Anyway, I'd appreciate if you share this and give it love. Thanks!

Part VI

[manjehaal]

Heyyy for killervibe, not established. Can I please have “do you really think I’m happy?” And “don’t let the door hit you on the way out” if you can combine that thank uu

“What are you doing here, Cisco?” came Frost’s severe tone, irritated by the sight of him on Caity’s porch. 

Her livid vehemence wasn’t new to Cisco. Despite the lack of explanation, he had learned to expect this coldness directed at him lately. Frost, with her short answers, dismissive comments, and the unwavering stance to not let him see Caitlin. The whole persona turned his stomach, reminding him of another time not so long ago when Frost was the enemy and Caitlin was fading away quickly. His only relief in Frost’s new behavior was that it was only directed at him. Outside of that, her actions were far from unusual. 

“I want to talk to Caitlin,” he said despite it all, hoping Frost might show sympathy to him now if she took note of the worry in his face and the pleading in his eyes. 

“No.” 

“Please.” 

She crossed her arms. “No.” 

He shook his head in frustration, trying not to let his mind consider older troubles. But her behavior startled him, and the words were out before he could bite them back. “Why not? Why don’t you let her out? Live her life?” 

Frost scoffed. “Don’t act like you care.” 

“What are you talking about? Of course, I care! She’s my best friend. You know this better than anyone.” 

She was already turning, trying to close the door in his face. “It’s not me who needs to be reminded.” 

He couldn’t understand it. The accusation was absurd. Everyone under the sun knew how dedicated he was to the wellbeing of Caitlin Snow, at least he thought, including Caitlin and her other half. It had his mind reeling at the thought of Caitlin somehow doubting his friendship. 

“What does that mean? Doesn’t she want to see me?” 

“You need to leave,” Frost said shortly as if she had just touched him with her icy kiss of death. 

He sighed to himself, trying to ignore the two glowing eyes that were trained on him. “Okay, I will. But tell me why first.” 

“No. I shouldn’t have to explain this to you.” 

Exasperated, he followed Frost into the entryway, his eyes wide with concern. “So it’s true? She doesn’t want to see me?” 

Frost pushed him in the chest, startling him into taking a step out of the doorway. 

She studied him, feeling a tinge of guilt at his hurt expression, but it faded the moment it came. Cisco’s distress didn’t bother her anymore. Not after feeling the aftershock of Caitlin’s heartache, eating away at even Frost for days and days without a beath. That hurt inside Caitlin Snow filled Frost with a brand new kind of fury. With a fierce protectiveness that took over her entire being. 

 So Cisco’s sad eyes wouldn’t work on her. 

“Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.” 

He wasn’t leaving without an explanation. “Frost!” 

She just shook her head 

“Frost, let Caitlin go!” 

Frost scoffed incredulously. “You still think that little of me? That I’d hold her captive in her own body? Well, fuck you. I care about Caity more than you ever could. I’m just happy she allows me to have a life. The least I could do is protect her from the person who hurts her the most.” 

“I would never hurt her. I could never.”

“Well,” she said, about to close the door in his face again. “You’re doing a fantastic job at proving yourself wrong.” She was just about to close the door in his face, yet again when he reached forward.  

“Wait!” he said, holding the doorknob steady, not letting her close it. He looked at her this time without the accusation that had just darkened his eyes, but instead, he just looked hopeless, with fear caught in them. “Please, Frost. Let me talk to her. Let me fix whatever it is that I did to her because I swear, I will do anything. Anything.” 

She wondered what could possibly make his face change like that. From confident and brilliant Cisco Ramon to the boy grasping at anything to keep Caitlin in his life. It was as if someone (perhaps Frost) had pulled the life completely from him. Everything except that steady flame of passion that lit up his dark eyes. She had only ever seen him look like this once before, three years ago when he was pleading with her, to come home and be Caitlin again.    

“You love her,” Frost said softly, suddenly realizing it completely 

He almost smiled, looking at Frost with the weight of his desperation. “Of course I love her.” 

Despite her better judgment, she opened the door all the way, letting him enter.

                                                           ~.~

A few moments passed as Cisco sat wordlessly on the sofa, waiting apprehensively for Caitlin to tell him why she was burying herself behind Frost for so long. 

When she did finally stand in front of him, hands tied around in a nervous knot, he almost wanted to run for his life. 

“Frost said you wanted to talk.” 

He didn’t know where to start, but his mind began drifting to Frost’s accusing eyes and began there. “I hurt you.” 

She took a large breath at his words, directing her eyes everywhere but him.  “No.”

“No? That’s not what Frost thinks.” 

She looked at him, softening her gaze and sliding into the chair across from him.  “She shouldn’t have done that. I didn’t ask her to.”

“But is she telling the truth?” 

She bit her lip, avoiding his gaze again, answering with her silence. When she saw the realization in his eyes, she shook her head. “It’s not your fault.” 

“Well, it feels like it is.” 

She shook her head, meeting his eyes with gentle firmness. “But it isn’t, okay? You should never feel guilty for being happy. Never.” 

“Happy?” he asked, his face blank. 

Caitlin didn’t want to say it, but after a few moments of silence, she let her pride collapse. “I mean, with Kamilla. You’re happy and…” 

His intense stare left her wordless, shrinking under the scrutiny she felt she should probably receive. But despite that, he mostly looked confused, processing what she had just said. And why she said it. And why she would care who he’s dating. Or why that would hurt her. 

“Cait,” he finally said, frowning. “Do you really think I’m happy?”

She had made the assumption after the last few weeks in the lab. With his enthusiastic stories and the more regular visits Kamilla made to the lab. He seemed happy. But then, Caitlin had avoided watching at all costs. If there was any ingenuity in his behavior, she had been hiding somewhere else or vowing to let Frost take the reigns. 

“I thought,” she said simply, looking away from him. 

“I…” he started, moving over in his seat so that he was closer to her. “It’s a show.” 

“What?” she asked, noting his earnest eyes.  

“It’s all a show. I’ve just been trying so hard to prove to you, to everyone…even to myself, that I can move on. That I’m over it.” 

“Cynthia?” 

“No,” he said, burying his hands in his hair. “You.” 

She didn’t say anything, just stared down at her hands, trying to wrap her mind around what had just come from his lips. 

“When you left Central City, you told me to let you go. And I did. I tried. I really did.” 

She sat, frozen, unable to speak as he went on. 

“And I cared deeply about Cynthia. And I do care about Kamilla. But I couldn’t do it. I can’t do it. I can’t let you go.” 

She stared, eyes full with hope, reassuring herself that she wasn’t dreaming. That he was real and meant it. “What are you saying, Cisco?” 

He laughed as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. “I’m saying that I love you!” 

“You do?” she asked, unable to keep herself from grinning, suddenly struck by the way he was looking at her. The way he had always looked at her. 

Suddenly, it all seemed foolish. All the days she had avoided him. All the times she had willingly missed out on life to protect herself from heartbreak. Like a coward, she kept her mouth clamped shut on the matter. 

(Even ignoring that his enthusiasm about his new relationship only appeared after she had pointed out his lack of usual passion.)

She had blinded herself into missing all his failed attempts at not loving her. And while she was trying to push him away, he had been doing the same to her. All along, he had been trying with all his might to let go of her. 

He nodded, taking her hand “I do.”

She didn’t say anything. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. 

“I never thought it would hurt you. I never thought you’d care.” 

She shook her head fiercely, not wanting him to misread what her heart was telling her. “You think too little of yourself,” she said, feeling bold enough to touch his face, running her thumb down the side of his cheek. “I never should have asked you to let me go,” she said, bringing her mouth to his. “Especially when I never really wanted you to. I love you too.” 

                                                        ~.~

When he saw Frost standing in the corridor the next day, he almost panicked, wondering why it was Frost approaching him and not Caitlin. 

“Frost?” he asked, walking toward her hesitantly. “Can I talk to Caitlin?” 

For a moment she just looked at him as if she was trying to intimidate him. 

And she was.

Very successfully. 

“I guess,” she said, breaking into a smile. “But only because Caity is asking.” 

Cisco grinned. “Does she ask a lot?” 

Frost rolled her eyes. “All the time.” 

And suddenly he was looking at Caitlin Snow, his girlfriend, and the love of his life. And she was hiding behind no one.

[saiilorstars]

It Had To Be You

Ch.9:  A Partner’s Beginning // Story Masterlist

Fandom: The Flash

Pairings: Barry Allen x Original Female Character

Summary: Belén and Barry are just starting to figure out how to work with each other as partners. Around the same time, Barry comes face to face with an old childhood bully that still manages to hurt him. It’s only when he remembers that he’s no longer alone that he’s finally able to leave the past in the past.

Pronunciation of OC’s name: Bell-en. The last syllable has an emphasis so it’s not pronounced like ‘Helen’ would be.

~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~ 0 ~

Rayan Palayta couldn't stop reading articles and reports of the new vigilante that had made her debut in Starling City with the Arrow, Black Canary, Speedy and so on. That same vigilante was now one of the top stories being sold by the CC Picture News despite it being weeks after her first initial appearance in the city. Iris West was one of the lead reporters in that area and Rayan couldn't help suspect that the woman had no idea who this new vigilante was.

"So-" Maritza's voice made him look up from the laptop in front of him, "-this is where you're keeping yourself up now?" she made a gesture to the abandoned warehouse they were in. She walked into the small office where Rayan had secluded himself in for almost the entire day - as stated by Angela (or Pixel as she now liked to call herself).

"It was part of the gang of robbers I took care off a while ago," Rayan gave a shrug of his shoulders and clicked the link to a new article on the computer. "Decided to use it since Pixel's beginning to give me headaches," he rubbed his temples where he could feel an echo of said headaches.

"Pixel?" Maritza repeated, musing on what the switch of names could mean. "Is that what you're calling the ex?" Rayan rolled his eyes but said nothing. Instead, he focused on the article that gave origin points of the new vigilante. "Can't say I'm not happy to see that ending," Maritza said, crossing her arms and leaning against the wall, "Angela's kind of weird, but even I have to say that it's not technically her fault she nearly killed our dear sister."

At the mention of Belén, Rayan's eyes raised from the computer again. His face was stone cold and yet...he was guilty. He was guilty he nearly killed his sister without realizing. He had given the order to eliminate the new vigilante that was seemingly in the city to help out the Flash. He couldn't believe his ears when Pixel had returned with the news that the new vigilante had turned out to be none other than Belén. Rayan had raged, and somewhere along there, had blasted Pixel across her own living room, crashing several of her ornaments.

"If it helps-" Maritza leaned off the wall and moved towards the desk, "-my friend has nothing new to report on Belén. I thought that maybe Belén knew who the Flash was so I set my friend up in her job but she's been perfectly normal with no vigilante business."

"That he can see," Rayan reminded. "Let's not forget that he's not exactly friends with her."

"Alright, so he becomes closer to her, makes friends with her," Maritza shrugged. "Then what? What are we going to do now that we know Belén is a metahuman?"

"Metahuman," Rayan rolled his eyes at the silly name they'd been branded with apparently.

"Rayan," Maritza called again, sharper. "The plan was to get Belén away from the city but now that it's clear she's not going anywhere, we're going to need to do something else."

"What else can we do?" Rayan rubbed his temples again. That headache was starting to come back. "If she's a meta like us, then we should get her to join us."

Maritza blinked and straightened up. "A-are...are you sure about that? Let's not forget Belén thinks you're dead."

"I know, I know, but...once I explain to her what happened...she'll see why I preferred to stay dead. If she's so keen on finding me...what's the big deal?"

"I think the 'big deal' has to do with that speedster already getting into her head. Let's not forget the fact she's already been a hero in Starling city with the Arrow. Why would she want to join us?"

"Because we're her family," Rayan stood up from his chair. "Who else would Belén choose over us?"

Maritza leveled his stare for a moment before looking away. "It won't be easy...but...maybe you're right."

"Of course I am," Rayan smirked. "So we should start working on that before she really becomes a hero and loses us."

~ 0 ~

"Cisco, I'm not wearing a skirt," Belén shook her head in the most polite way possible, but the action still had Cisco groaning in frustration. Caitlin sat at the other end of the desk, laughing to herself but giving the appearance of working on something else.

"But why not? It'll be a very pretty skirt, I promise, see?" Cisco gestured to the computer in front of them with the design of what would later become Belén's new super suit.

Now that they had began examining Belén's new biology and grasped a basic understanding of her powers, Cisco felt it was time for her to suit up. He would rather die than let her continue on with the outfit given to her by the 'Arrow cave'. Belén was excited for it, honestly, but they were just having creative differences.

"I'm not wearing a skirt if I'm gonna be out there helping Barry," Belén still refused much to Cisco's dismay.

Cisco made a motion with his hands for them to be calm and start over. "Okay, hear me out now," he said, warning her to let him speak first before she shot him down again. Belén got comfortable in her seat, crossing her arms and legs, to listen to him. "You need your suit to be more open to accommodate your powers. You said your vines can come through your hands and body which means the suit needs to have some openings. True or not true?"

Belén rolled her eyes but gave her confirming nod. "Yes, I know. And I am all for it if it means it'll make it easier to use my powers. That, however, does not mean that I have to go out in a miniskirt. Caitlin?"

Cisco glanced back at the silent brunette who of course had a side to choose. "She's right," Caitlin said with a small smile.

"You can't send me out there barely clothed, Cisco. I fall and I scrape my legs. I like my legs, Cisco, and I want them to be protected. Don't you?" Belén raised a questioning eyebrow. Cisco couldn't help give her legs a look-over. She chuckled and playfully hit him in the arm. "Stop looking at my legs!"

"Then work with me here!" Cisco let his head fall on the desk with a thud, causing Belén to lose it with another round of laughter.

"I think I broke Cisco," she told Caitlin, quite victoriously.

"Oh, he's finally quiet, thank you," Caitlin patted Cisco's back.

"Shut up," came Cisco's muffled order.

"Bells?" Barry had come into the room, making the ombre-blonde look back. He was about to say something when he saw Cisco still with his head on the desk. "What's…"

"I broke the great Cisco Ramon," Belén giggled and poked Cisco on the arm. "And over a skirt."

"Over a skirt?" Barry scoffed and came up to the three.

"When you say it like that of course it sounds bad!" Cisco pulled himself up and shot a warning look to Barry. He would not have Barry also ganging up on him like that.

"Cisco's trying to help me with a new suit," Belén finally explained. "But we seem to have disagreeing ideas…"

"Many," added Caitlin.

"It's not my fault Bells is being complicated!" Cisco exclaimed, earning himself a sharp look from said woman.

"You're the one trying to make me wear a mini-skirt for me to fight crime!"

"A mini-skirt?" Barry raised his eyebrows, barely getting a minute to think about that when someone smacked him on the stomach. He doubled over, groaning.

"That was for thinking about it," Belén got up from her seat then turned to Caitlin. "Honestly, Caitlin, I don't know how you put up with these two."

"I try my best," Caitlin dramatically said, now earning herself some sharp looks from Barry and Cisco.

"Bells, c'mon," Cisco began but the ombre-blonde cut him off.

"No! I don't want skirts," Belén left it clear for him. "I'm not made of steel, I do get hurt."

Barry was recovering from the blow and exhaled deeply. "Follow her instructions, Cisco, please." He then made a gesture to Belén for her to walk ahead.

"Hm," Belén threw him a look before grabbing her bag off the desk.

"Don't forget your treats," Caitlin reminded as she got up and walked across the room.

"Cait, that makes me sounds like a dog," Belén crinkled her nose.

"You know what I meant," Caitlin returned holding three wrapped up bars in her hands. "These should help you with your sugar levels."

"Yay," Belén said meekly as she took the bars and shoved them into her bag. As it turned out, her dizzy spells were part of her new metahuman abilities. Because her body was now divided with new Azalea genetics, her body required more sugar that she was not ingesting.

Cisco joked it was her needing to do photosynthesis.

Belén had promptly smacked him upside the head for it.

The bars that Caitlin and Cisco had made were specifically created to raise her sugar levels on a daily basis and thus prevent anymore side effects from harming her. Belén could definitely go without those min-episodes.

"Let's go," Barry told the ombre-blonde metahuman. She gave him a nod and in a second he had sped them to her block.

"That's still weird," she giggled as they began normally walking towards her house.

"Didn't seem so weird when 'the Streak' did it to you," Barry smirked. "In fact, you looked more in awe. And you certainly liked it."

"Shut up befoe I smack you again," she warned then came to an abrupt stop. "So, um, when exactly were you planning on telling me that you and Iris are on a no talk basis now?"

The question froze Barry in his tracks. He turned around and met her expectant look.

"I know I'm a bit slow sometimes but I've figured it out. It's been a while since I got back, and coincidentally the next day you stop talking to her. What, was it my fault you argued?"

"No," Barry quickly said to her, coming back to her, "It's just…" he sighed, "...she's been writing about us, Bells. Joe asked me to talk to her and it didn't work. I got frustrated with her not listening so I...may have asked her not to talk to me."

"Why would you do that, Barry?" Belén whispered, looking horrified. "She's your friend - practically sister!"

"I know-"

"And if there's anyone you should be upset with that she's still writing it's with me! I visited her and now I gave her more fuel. Don't be mad with her. Be made with me."

"No, it's not your fault. I'm genuinely worried about what could happen to her…"

"I get it, don't think I don't. Joe wants to keep his daughter safe and you just want her to be okay. But in the long run, I think it's Iris who should make the decision. I understand completely what it feels like having this passion for writing. It's my life, honestly. And once you find your subject, there is hardly anything anyone can do to make you stop."

"Hardly?" Barry repeated and noticed a strange shift in Belén's face.

"Let's just say...I had to leave some things..." she said and left it to that. "Thanks for bringing me home. Dad's been a bit on the fence of where I'm at now that I'm back. He thinks by having me hitch rides it's a sure way that I'll come home early." Because when she came back to the city, her father had taken the car privileges away for a while. Belén thought that was a bit fair.

"Tell him you were with me then," Barry then blinked when he realized how it came off and immediately set to correct it, but his stammering prevented a full sentence, "I-I m-mean...y-you know...like, uh...l-like...w-well...I mean…"

Belén covered her laugh with a hand and walked past him for her front porch. "I think I'll just say I was with some friends." She turned around, taking small steps backwards to the porch. "Cos if I say I was with the Streak he wouldn't get a kick out of it like others would."

"Yeah…"

"Take my advice about Iris though - just tell her already." And with that, Belén bid him goodnight.

~ 0 ~

Some time later that night, Belén had pulled out her laptop to finish her work for CC Pictures. Her father walked by with a coffee mug and sat down beside her on the couch. When Belén realized he was staring at her she gently closed the lid of her laptop and met his eyes.

"Hi, Dad," a fleeting smile graced her lips. "Can I help you with something?"

"What were you reading?"

"Um, well, to be honest, I was giving Iris' blog a glimpse. She posted something new a couple minutes ago." And Belén was not happy to see it. While she stood by her statements she didn't want Iris getting hurt. Perhaps if she knew the truth it would sway her from that specific topic, or at the very least make her articles more cautiously.

Belén's father sighed and shook his head, clearly disapproving as well. "That girl is just looking for trouble. I like Iris, she's a very sweet young woman but this blog is going to get her in trouble. The city's not safe anymore with all these people with powers. They're all evil."

"Not everyone," Belén softly disagreed.

David scoffed, picking up his mug from the coffee table. "Honey, you've seen the news. Lots of people are getting hurt out there."

"Yes, but many of others are getting saved. Let's not clump all metahumans as evil."

"What?" David gave her a sharp glance.

Belén's eyes widened and coughed nervously. "Nothing. I said we shouldn't brand all people as bad."

David tilted his head and stared another minute at Belén. Sheepishly, she rubbed her arm and tried upholding his look. "Are you okay, Belén?"

"M-me? Yeah, Dad," Belén lightly smiled.

"You know, ever since you got back, you're...you seem different."

"D-different?"

"Yes. Time was you used to be completely engulfed with school and your friends and your internship."

"Dad, I graduated..."

"Yes, but your friends, they're not around anymore."

"What are you talking about? I do have friends-"

"Not the same ones." David put his muttered on the coffee table and shifted in Belén's direction. "Hilary, remember her?"

"Of course I remember Hilary."

"And then Jason, and Meghan, and all the others. They're not around anymore."

Belén sighed. "Dad, Hilary is getting used to her new job across the city. Jason moved and Meghan went on to graduate school. Everyone's got things to do."

"What about Iris?"

"What about her?"

"Haven't seen her in a while either."

"She, um...she's a having some complications with, uh, with Barry. She's not exactly in the talking mood."

"But you are," David gave her another look that she didn't understand. "It's just, since you got back I rarely see you with Iris now. It's either that Caitlin Snow-"

"Dr. Caitlin Snow," Belén wagged a finger. "She didn't go to school for people to overlook her title."

"Right," David playfully rolled his eyes. "Dr. Caitlin Snow, and Cisco Ramon, or Barry. They're not exactly the people I would expect you to be around…"

"They're good people and I like being with them," Belén smiled. "Don't go all 'They're from STAR Labs so they can't be good' on me."

David shook his head. "No, I wouldn't do that. despite what Harrison Wells caused to the city, I do respect his employees' loyalty to him. But sweetie, how long have you known Cisco and Caitlin, again?"

"Ten months."

"And then you met Barry how?"

"Through...Iris…?" Belén was barely making the connections when her father finally explained.

"You've known Iris for years and I don't think it's right you sideline her for these new people you haven't known for long."

"Oh my God Dad!" Belén chuckled. "I am not sidelining Iris for them! I just happen to have, um...a connection with them. That's all."

David raised an eyebrow and said nothing for the next minute. Then suddenly, he asked, "Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yes, Dad, I'm fine," Belén couldn't help smile out of flushness.

"Alright," David clapped his knees and got up, appearing to be done with the subject but Belén doubted it would be the last she would hear about it. He grabbed his mug and walked by, planting a kiss on her head. "Goodnight, sweetheart."

"Goodnight, Daddy," Belén smiled after him.

She waited for him to leave before diving back into her computer. There was much to do after all!

~ 0 ~

Caitlin was in utter shock as she went over the various injuries Barry had managed to get in the span of a five minute fight with another metahuman.

"13 fractures," she began listing off to Barry, who laid in bed wincing at her scolding tone, while Cisco and Dr. Wells listened silently. "That's a whole new record! And not to mention that's only just in your hand. You also have a concussion, three cracked ribs, and a bruised spleen. Even with your powers, you'll need a few hours to heal."

When Dr. Wells was sure Caitlin had finished, he made the question all of them were curious to know about. "What exactly did you hit?"

"A man," Barry sighed, recalling the terrible fight. "A big, bad man. His skin changed when I hit him. Like, it turned to metal."

Wells raised his eyebrows as he thought about the new metahuman. "Interesting. A man of steel."

"So you went after a meta-human alone?" Even Cisco was disappointed in Barry for his abrupt encounter with the metahuman. "Dude, why didn't you call us?"

"I didn't know what he was," Barry said meekly before adding, "Besides, I was off-duty." And he would rather not go into detail about what that meant exactly.

"You're lucky he didn't knock out your teeth," Cisco pointed seriously. "Those puppies don't grow back."

"The strange thing is I feel like I knew him…" Barry admitted, still confused himself.

"What do you mean?" Wells inquired.

"He said something that was familiar, but he's gonna hurt someone if we don't stop him. So how do I fight a guy that's made of steel?"

"We will find a way. Tonight, you heal."

Barry had no energy to fight about that. He nodded his head and prepared for some sleep, or at the very least a nap.

~ 0 ~

Belén was close to finishing her article for the day and couldn't be happier about it. It was nice getting back to a normal life - especially one with a good income. CC Picture News had been happy to receive her back as an official employee and had already tasked her with several important articles. She'd even made some new co-worker friends besides Linda and Iris.

"Scuse me?" a young man stopped by her desk with a manila folder in his hands.

Belén looked away from her computer to meet the freckled-face of a dark-haired man with blue eyes. She'd seen him around but never actually talked to him. "Hi, can I help you?"

"Yes, and I'm sorry about it..." the man started, chuckling nervously. Belén raised an eyebrow, confused of course. The man cleared his throat awkwardly and smiled at her. "Um, I'm Noah Gilan and I'm sort of a cub-reporter..."

"Oh, you're the new one Linda took on, right?" Belén recalled the various times she'd seen him tail Linda around.

Noah nodded his head. "Yeah, and she said you might be helpful in helping me write an article."

"Me?" Belén repeated, sounding (and looking) surprised. "I don't know, I mean...I'm sure there's plenty more experienced writers. I literally just started as an official employee a couple weeks ago."

"No, that's good - I mean, for me, cos...you know...some of the older people around here are sort of..." Noah leaned forwards to whisper, "...rude."

Belén chuckled. "Yeah, I know what you mean."

"Anyways, Linda said that you might be interested in being partners for a while. Just until I get the hang of things around here."

"I mean...if I can help then I will," Belén shrugged, not finding a problem. "It'd be nice to co-write some articles. I've done some already with my friend, Iris?"

"West?" Noah recalled. "Yeah, I've talked to her but I don't really know her."

"Well, she's a fantastic writer too if you ever want to find another partner," Belén said. "But in the meantime...you got any ideas for some new articles?" she asked with a sly look.

~ 0 ~

Come lunch time, Belén found herself swept by a certain speedster only a couple steps from CC Pictures. She was all fond of the easy manner of getting around but not when she had literally promised her new co-worker/partner she would have lunch him. She already wasn't very happy with Barry and the others for not informing her about his encounter with the new metahuman last night. Getting a simple text in the morning was not sufficient.

"Woah, new guy we need to talk about?" Cisco immediately raised an eyebrow at the ombre-blonde, apparently having selective hearing because that was the only thing that caught his attention.

Belén rolled her eyes and hopped onto a table, letting her legs dangle. "I'm helping someone," she shot Barry a look, the latter currently taking a seat on the edge of the gurney-bed. "Next time call me, no?"

"Sorry, I was a bit distracted," Barry sighed. "I found out who our new metahuman is and I happen to know him."

"From where?" Caitlin came into the side room with a mug of coffee.

"His name is Tony, and he was my goddamn awful bully when I was eleven," Barry still appeared angry about the whole thing. "He used to bully me whenever he got the chance, and I was never able to do anything about it."

"Your childhood nemesis is now an unstoppable meta-human," Cisco gawked at the idea. "That is seriously messed up."

"I had a childhood nemesis. Lexi La Roche," Caitlin narrowed her eyes as she thought about her own bully. "She used to put gum in my hair."

"Jake Puckett," Cisco pretended to shiver. "If I didn't let him copy my homework he'd give me a swirly."

"I didn't really have a bully," Belén had her head tilted to the side, seemingly trying to think about one bully in her childhood. "Everyone just...seemed to like me…"

The other three traded looks among each other while Belén continued to think.

"Now that we've established that we're all uber-nerds," Barry began and glanced towards Belén, "except Belén who was clearly one of the popular girls-"

"Hey," Belén frowned his way. "It's not my fault no one wanted to bully me. I was nice to people, unlike you who speeds people out of their lunch plans." And as a mature gesture, she stuck her tongue out at him.

"Nice," Barry remarked, rolling his eyes. "Anyways, what are we gonna do about Tony?"

Cisco clapped his hands together, smirking. "Glad you asked. We're gonna train you, man. Karate Kid style."

"Hmm, I'm interested in seeing how this plays out," Belén said to Caitlin as they followed after Cisco.

He led them into another side room where a metal figure had been set in the middle. With its makeshift head and metal bar arms, it could almost be seen as a punching bag.

"Behold! I call him Girder!" Cisco gestured to the figure as he went over to a table.

Barry raised an eyebrow and glanced back at Caitlin. She, seeing his thoughts, immediately said, "For the record, not my idea."

"What is this supposed to be?" Belén seemed oddly amused by the metal figure as she walked around it. "It looks kind of funny...oh!" she clapped her hands, "Like one of those villains on movies!"

"I don't understand how you didn't get bullied," Cisco returned with a control hanging from his neck. "You just have that…thing people want to mess with."

"What thing?" Belén stared at him a long while, not understanding his insinuation.

"Nothing," Barry reached out for her arm and pulled her away from the metal figure.

"But he just said…"

"It really doesn't matter, he's wrong," Barry left her by the doorway where Caitlin was and turned back for Cisco, making a cutting motion across his neck. The last thing they needed was to further annoy Belén for the day.

"So," Cisco received the message and focused on the 'training' that was supposed to happen, "fighting is physics. It's not about strength. It's not about size. It's about energy and power. Channel your speed the right way and you can totally take this bad boy down. Now obviously your Girder is a moving target. So... I have ice and bandages standing by."

"What a reassurance," Caitlin mumbled so that only Belén was to hear. Both were completely disapproving of the idea. Nothing good would come out of it.

While Barry wasn't so keen on the idea of fighting this metal thing, he realized his options were oh-so-limited. He started to punch the figure in a speedy manner while dodging its movements Cisco enacted via the control. He would switch sides every so often but in the end the device proved a little quicker and punched him near the shoulder. Barry fell to the floor with a loud thud...and a crack somewhere.

"I'm pretty sure I just dislocated my shoulder," Barry groaned and clutched said shoulder.

While Cisco remained back to fix the Girder, Caitlin attended to Barry in another room. Seeing it was definitely a dislocated shoulder, she prepared him for the worst. "Okay, not gonna lie. This is gonna be quick but extremely painful."

"This was a stupid idea from the start," Belén was watching them attentively from the threshold. "Even I'm not that clueless!"

"Thanks, Bells," Barry winced. "I can always count on you to make me feel better."

Belén shrugged. "Great that you can!"

Barry heard his cellphone go off and struggled to answer it with one arm. "Eddie, hey."

"Allen, we found the stolen Humvee in the alley at Fremont and Lawrence. Need you down here to do your thing."

"Great. I'll see you in a sec," Barry hung up and looked at Caitlin, resigned to what would come next. "Okay…let's do this."

As he laid down on the bed, Belén rushed over to his side and grabbed his hand. "It hurts less if someone holds your hand. Trust me, I've broken and sprained bones so many times."

"You?" Barry asked, clearly doubting her words.

"Mhm, from when I did my aerial dancing," she said casually, but because of his coma-state Barry didn't know about that part of her life.

"What!?"

Caitlin chose that moment to snap Barry's shoulder back into place. The metahuman screamed and unintentionally squeezed Belén's hand in the process. She ended up screaming too and nearly fell to her knees in response.

~ 0 ~

"You were an aerial dancer?" it was now Barry who was standing on the side of the bed while Belén was treated for a broken hand. Feeling incredibly guilty for what he'd done, Barry had gone out (or sped out) and brought her back lunch that she had missed...because of him as well.

"I really was," Belén laughed at such doubt she received from him.

"And a good one," Cisco spoke up on her behalf. "I've seen videos."

"Very graceful," Caitlin added while she wrapped a gauze around Belén's hand. "I don't think I could balance myself with silk ropes..."

"It's not that hard if you got the practice for it," Belén shrugged.

"You don't look like the sort," Barry said to the ombre-blonde. "But what happened, if you don't mind my asking?"

"Um..." Belén's smile faltered a little bit but it came right back before she responded fully, "My Mom said that it wasn't a real career. See, my plans weren't to become a writer at all - I wanted to dance. But my parents talked it over with me - over and over - until I just agreed to leave it for journalism. I found that I actually love to write, but..." she sheepishly looked down, letting the other three figure it out.

"You wouldn't mind going back," Caitlin said it for her.

"Yeah," Belén nodded her head, looking pretty excited just at the thought of returning to her dancing. "I had a team, actually, here in the city. I haven't talked to them in a while..."

"You should go and see them some time," Cisco suggested, like many of the other times they'd gotten into that conversation. "You know, and maybe show some us some moves."

Belén laughed, face flushing pink. "Right. I'd probably fall on my ass now that I haven't practiced."

"No you wouldn't," Cisco shook his head. "I'm serious. Go back and do some dancing, girl."

"Well, now I can kind of understand why you didn't have a bully," Barry said distractedly. "You were like a triple threat."

Belén shot him a look. "Seriously?"

"Good writer, cute rambler, and an aerial dancer?"

Caitlin exchanged a look with Cisco whiled Belén blushed. She finished up with the gauze and Belén jumped right off the bed the moment her cell phone went off.

"Shoot, it's Linda," she made a face and rushed off to go answer it.

Cisco managed to contain himself a minute before he mocked Barry. "A cute rambler…" Caitlin giggled as Barry shot a glare on Cisco. "That's not a triple threat, that was just what you thought of her."

"I...I didn't mean it like that," Barry soon what he was talking about and became flustered. He panicked at the idea that he may have overstepped with Belén. But if that'd been the case she would've said something right after, no?

"Sure you didn't," Cisco made the last statement before Belén returned.

"That was Linda. I have to get back to work! Barry? Can I get a lift back please?"

"Yeah, I gotta go anyways." Barry was all too pleased to be leaving the mocking room behind. "Eddie's waiting for me anyways."

"See you guys later," Belén waved goodbye to Cisco and Caitlin. In a flash, she and Barry were gone.

~ 0 ~

When Belén returned to work, the first thing she did was stop by Noah's desk to apologize profusely for her sudden departure. Noah just chuckled as he got up from his chair to go make copies.

"I was wondering what happened to you," he said thoughtfully.

Belén rushed after him, her hand reaching to keep her purse's strap over her shoulder. "I-I am so sorry! Th-there was, th-this...there was a thing…"

Noah pressed one paper down on the printer's scanner and closed the lid. "There was a thing?" He repeated the question and Belén meekly smiled. Yeah, so she would definitely need to become better at lying if she was intending on becoming a full fighting metahuman.

"A-an important thing," Belén added as if it would make her excuse much more plausible. "But you should know that I am, under no circumstances, a ditcher! I don't skip out on plans I make with people! Once I agree to something I stick by it! I honor what I say and I-"

Noah turned around to face the rambling woman and promptly laughed. Belén straightened, confused. "Do you normally ramble like this?"

"U-um…" Belén leaned on her hip, one hand nervously scratching her head. "I've...I've been told...I, uh, I tend to…"

Noah laughed again, quieter this time. "It's kinda cute," he turned back to the printer and took out the scanned paper.

"I've been told that too…" Belén mumbled, thinking back to Barry's words earlier. She felt her face warm up and was glad Noah still had his back to her.

"I get it, Belén, something unexpected came up," Noah stuck in another paper to be scanned. "It happens. No need to feel bad about it."

"But I do feel bad," Belén moved around the scanner to face Noah. "You have to let me make it up, yeah? We could do lunch tomorrow? Big Belly Burger?"

"Yeah but I feel bad. Please, let me make it up?"

Noah turned around with a quizzical look on his face. "How about we make it dinner instead? We can stay in here and continue working."

Belén thought about it for a minute before nodding her head. "Yeah, I can do that - I meant that I want to do that!" she quickly corrected herself, flushing from embarrassment. "Not that I was doing it because I had to in that I'm being forced to and-" Noah's laughter cut her off. "I'm rambling again, aren't I?"

"A bit, yeah," Noah removed the second scanner paper from the printer. "Save that for the reporting, though. You're quick!"

Belén nervously chuckled while he continued to scan more papers. If only my rambling could help me make good excuses, she thought.

~ 0 ~

"Barry! Check it out!" Cisco waved Barry to come over to the desk where he had several tabs opened on the computer. Barry had taken to him a sample of gravel he'd retrieved earlier from the crime scene of Tony's. "The gravel you pulled from Tony's ride? It contains 76.8% hematite. Consistent with the mines at Keystone Ironworks."

"Which closed down ten months ago. It's the perfect hideout," Barry realized with an air of relief. He needed to bring down Tony before someone truly got hurt.

Caitlin cleared her throat and walked over to them holding her tablet towards them. "Barry, do you mind telling me about this?" She read aloud Iris' new blog post to them. "I have info about someone you're looking for. He was here. You know where to find me.' Now who could she be talking to?"

Barry nervously looked away.

"Belén told us what she did, meeting Iris one time but she never said she was going back," Caitlin's motherly glare was enough to make anyone squirm. "Belén can't be doing this, Barry...she can't…"

"Alright, it wasn't Bells," Barry sighed. "I couldn't help it. I went to see Iris to try my hand at getting her to stop with her blog."

"Hm, and how'd that go?"

"Clearly not well seeing as she's sending out SOS posts now," Cisco mumbled.

"Okay! It wasn't my best idea!" Barry exclaimed. "But look, Iris clearly has something we can use and we can't pass that up."

"Clearly," Cisco nodded and received a sharp look from Caitlin.

"Who's side are you on!?"

"The side that wins obviously," Cisco rolled his eyes.

There was a buzzing noise coming from Barry's cellphone and when he looked at the ID he did admit he was a little afraid. "H-hello?" He winced.

"Why am I reading 'I have info about someone you're looking for. He was here. You know where to find me' from Iris' blog?" Belén asked in an edgy tone.

"See, what had happened was-"

"Barry, I'm a journalist, I can put two and two together. You clearly went to see Iris as we agreed but instead of making her stop, as we also agreed, you only made her put herself out there even more."

"I didn't mean to!"

"No of course you didn't. So, what's the plan? How are you going to fix this? I'm working late tonight and I can't be whisked away again so don't even try it.'

"It's quite simple, actually," Barry sucked in a breath, his eyes flickering from Caitlin to Cisco who remained at bay from the conversation, "I'll be visiting Iris."

~ 0 ~

As Barry planned, they all did. While Caitlin and Cisco monitored their conversation, Barry spoke to Iris who truly did have something useful (and important) to say. Tony had the audacity to visit her earlier in the day, simply to flirt but made a threatening gesture when he was close to being caught. Needless to say, Barry was furious. Tony was his bully and it was his responsibility to find him and put him away in the pipeline before anyone was hurt. Yet Tony easily slipped through the radar and visited Iris in broad daylight!

What kind of hero was he!?

Well, he was not going to be the hero that let enemies like this get so close to his family.

That was his brand new (and abrupt) idea.

"Barry, talk to us. What are you doing?" Caitlin nearly demanded from the metahuman as he sped out of Jitters without saying a word to either.

"Dude, don't run angry," Cisco said, but his words went unheard. "We don't know how to defeat him yet."

Barry ignored both until he came into the Keystone building where Tony was allegedly staying. As he walked further inside he took notice of all the empty beer bottles and upturned machines. He stopped when he came across a decent sized, dry hill of what looked like...steel? Yes, that was it. It had to be.

"This is definitely the place," Barry spoke to other two still anxiously waiting for an update.

"You're trespassing, freak!" Tony suddenly appeared behind Barry and wasted no time in punching him.

He swiftly grabbed Barry and threw him into one of the nearby shelves. As Barry fell to the ground, Tony went for the shelf and pulled it down. Everything on the shelf, including things nearby it, fell over Barry.

~ 0 ~

As promised, Belén and Noah stayed in at CC Pictures to finish their work. Dinner was a pick up from the local Big Belly Burger. They had made very good progress and were nearly halfway done with the work. Plus, Belén had a chance to see who Noah was. She decided only thirty minutes after beginning to work with him that she liked Noah. He was nice, and very understanding. He was well aware of her family issues and minded how he worded his questions or even just how to act correctly when they spoke about sibling matters. He was reserved, surprisingly, but not enough to not laugh once in a while. Belén could definitely see a good friendship between them two.

Belén placed down a clear, colorful photograph on her desk of Plasticine in the middle of a jewelry heist. She then put down another photograph of Plasticine robbing a plain, old liquor store. Unbeknownst to Noah, the photographs had been retrieved by good ole Felicity Smoak when Belén was staying over in Starling City. She thought the best way to let Plasticine know she was being hunted was for Belén to publish an article on her. She just felt a little bad for not telling Noah.

"This metahuman is a weird one," she stated with arms crossed and a pensive look. "I mean, one day she's stealing priceless jewelry and then the next day..."

Noah picked up the photograph with Plasticine robbing the liquor store. "She's stealing milk."

"She's stealing milk," Belén hummed in agreement. "What kind of metahuman steals milk?"

"Metahuman?" Noah raised an eyebrow, his blue eyes boring onto Belén. "What is that?"

"Um..." Belén mentally slapped herself for being so careless. This wasn't STAR Labs and Noah certainly was not one of her friends who knew about metahumans. "That's just...what, um...I've heard they're calling themselves."

Noah shrugged and moved closer to see the pictures again. Before she said anything else that could out her, she grabbed her soda can and took a big drink.

"I honestly think she's just doing some grocery shopping," Noah joked casually and put down the pictures side by side.

Belén swallowed her soda and laughed. "Really?"

"Hey, just because she's evil doesn't mean she doesn't like to eat," Noah raised his hands defensively.

"Well, the fact is that she does this a lot..."

"So she does grocery shopping!"

"I need you take this seriously!" Belén whacked him on the arm and took a minute to calm herself. She wanted to truly analyze the movements of this metahuman. So far, she had nothing concrete on Plasticine because the woman only came out on rare occasions. "Plasticine comes out and makes several heists, makes a clean getaway with usually no victims."

"She's good at what she does, then," Noah tilted his head thoughtfully.

"But most metahumans usually like to...play with their food...and Plasticine doesn't seem like that," Belén remembered what she learned from Plasticine's favorite jewelry shop the night she decided to visit in her vigilante form. Plasticine never made to harm anyone, and she only went in when Alizae - an employee of the shop - was there. "She's very calculating."

"And you are very Sherlock-like," Noah picked up a french fry from a bag and dropped it into his mouth.

Belén rolled her eyes, about to retort sarcastically when her cellphone went off. She moved to turn it off but saw it was Cisco. She made a gesture to Noah she would only be a moment. He nodded and went back to his desk for other papers.

"Cisco, what's up?" Belén went for her soda again and took a sip. She nearly choked on her drink when Cisco told her what Barry had done. Well, he added the word stupid in there and a bunch of other words Belén had never heard him say. "Y-yeah, I'll come and help! Don't worry, I'll -I'll be there!"

Like a spring she jumped into action, stuffing things in her bag and clearing her desk off. When Noah saw this he hurried over to see what was wrong.

Belén didn't give him opportunity to ask. She started apologizing instead. "I'm really sorry, Noah! There's something I gotta do! A thing! Yes!" She was midway towards the door and turned back to the confused man. "Another thing came up! Believe me, important, it's a very important thing! I'm…" her hand was desperately trying to find the door behind her, "...I'm really sorry, I'm not a ditcher! I'm really not! I promise!"

But as she left she felt her actions sharply contradicted her words.

~ 0 ~

"Who let him do this!? I can't believe he thought this was a good idea. I thought he was a scientist!"

"Bells, he's not te-"

Belén was shooting glaring daggers at Cisco. This was not the time to correct her. The two and Caitlin had driven up to the Keystone building hoping to find Barry. He wouldn't respond to them anymore but the sensors still indicated he was somewhere inside the building.

"Eugh, it stinks in here," Belén crinkled her nose the moment they entered the place. It reeked of beer and other smells she would rather not identify.

"Perfect hiding place, though," Cisco mumbled and went ahead.

"Barry? Barry, where are you?" Caitlin began calling out throughout the horrible mess that was the place.

Cisco saw a glimpse of Barry's elbow hidden underneath a shelf and dashed towards it. "Caitlin, Bells, over here!"

"Of course he got thrown under a shelf!" Belén exclaimed and hurried with Caitlin beside her.

"Barry?" Cisco tried pushing somethings out of the way. "Please, say something! Say something so we know you're okay."

"O-ow…" was all Barry could mutter at the moment.

"Get him out of there!" Caitlin ordered.

Belén moved over to Cisco's right side while he continued clearing a way out for Barry. With one hand, she created a vine tendril that shot out to the shelf. She raised another vine and together pushed the shelf up momentarily. "C-Cisco! It's heavy!" Belén groaned through her struggle to keep the vines working.

Cisco and Caitlin hurried to pull Barry out from underneath. The moment he was safely away from the shelf, Belén growled and let the shelf fall again. She, too, fell back on the ground from the force.

"Bells?" Caitlin quickly looked up from Barry.

"I'm fine, don't worry," Belén waved a hand as she got back to her feet. She hurried over to the three and took a look at Barry. He was in an awful state, so much that he couldn't properly move nor say his 'thanks'.

Thanks to his fast healing, by the time they got him back to STAR Labs the physical injuries had already faded to a point of only seeing a couple bruises here and there. Still, that didn't mean anyone's anger nor concern had lessened by then.

"What were you thinking!?" Dr. Wells was practically fuming at the metahuman lying on the bed. "What were you thinking? I told you that we would figure out a way to deal with him."

"I'll heal…" Barry was trying his best not to snap back at any of them, though it was becoming incredibly hard to do.

"That's not what he meant, Barry," Belén had her arms crossed and more or less the had the same angry face she had since they found him. "When I agreed to you visiting Iris I didn't think something stupid like this would happen! How could you do that!? What were you thinking, seriously!?"

"I-"

"No, you weren't thinking!" Belén went on, and no one dared to interrupt her. "Because if you had, you would've seen how stupid this idea was!"

"It was-"

"Who in the hell makes such an abrupt, thoughtless decision!?"

"Uh, how about you!?" Barry found himself snapping back in the moment. "Don't you remember you were the one that made a ridiculous decision to leave with a stranger for two complete months without so much of a word to any of us!?"

That shut Belén right up.

The flash of hurt in her eyes made everyone uncomfortable. She dropped her arms to her side, and pursed her lips. Overwhelmed, she left the room with haste.

Barry sighed and turned his head to the side, seeing all the disapproving looks from the others. "Too far, I know," he mumbled.

"She wasn't wrong," Dr. Wells continued on like nothing had happened. "This was an incredibly stupid idea. He could have killed you."

Exasperated, Barry got up from the bed. "I know, alright!? I know! In the past 36 hours I've had my ass handed to me twice by the guy that tortured me as a kid. I couldn't stop him then, and I can't stop him now! Even with my powers I'm still powerless against him."

Surprisingly, Wells didn't snap back. "Not necessarily. Cisco?"

Cisco nodded and went for the computers. After pulling up the right page, he began to explain. "Any material, if struck at a high enough velocity can be compromised. We ran an analysis on the metal in Tony's footprint. Based on its density and atomic structure, if you impact it at just the right angle, at just the right speed, you could do some serious damage."

"How fast would I have to go?" Barry, intrigued, calmed only slightly.

"Factoring in the metal's tensile strength, estimated dermal thickness, atmospheric pressure, air temp, you'd have to hit him at approximately... Mach 1.1."

Caitlin's mouth fell open. "You want Barry to hit something at 800 miles an hour?

"837, actually."

"I'm glad Bells isn't here to listen to this!" Caitlin blinked, putting her hands on her hips in that motherly way that let the others know she was completely against the idea. "That's faster than the speed of sound!"

"I know. He would create a sonic boom, which, as I've said before, would be awesome," Cisco couldn't help giggle of excitement.

"I've never gone that fast," Barry felt the need to remind everyone.

"Yet," Wells corrected.

"I can't believe we're actually entertaining this idea!" Caitlin shook her head, now wishing Belén hadn't left so she could back her up on this.

Cisco went back to the computer to give it another glance. "I mean, he'd need a straight shot from Miles away yeah, 5.3 Miles, theoretically. Do it right, you'll take him down."

"Do it wrong, you'll shatter every bone in your body, Barry," Caitlin also sharply reminded him.

Barry sucked in a breath and re-evaluated his limited options. This...would not be easy.

~ 0 ~

"Maritza, hey," Belén greeted her older sister at the front door the next day with a confused expression. It was fifteen minutes till eight in the morning - Belén was still in her pajamas while her sister was already professionally dressed.

The older brunette was holding her son's hand and was looking rather urgently. "Look, I know you probably are busy but...can you please look after Axel for the day?"

Belén's eyes flickered to her nephew, the latter probably already having been told he would be staying with her judging by the toothy grin he was giving her. "Mar, I...I have work," Belén glanced back into the empty house.

"Please Belén, I am desperate!" Maritza exclaimed. "I have to substitute the morning and do my class today and I can't afford the babysitter right now."

"Look, I would really like to help but I'm not exactly off to a good start at work right now. I actually have to majorly apologize again to my co-"

"Belén I will do anything you want but please just take him for the day?" Maritza put her hands together.

"Maritza…"

"Please?"

"What am I supposed to do with him all day?" Belén spoke in a hushed voice. Her nephew may be a four years old but he was incredibly smart and the last thing she wanted was for him to be upset that his 'auntie Belén' didn't want him.

"He's four," Maritza had taken the question as another form of 'yes' and so handed Axel to Belén, "Give him a coloring book and that'll be enough for hours."

"Maritza, I have work…" Belén said as a last resort but even she knew this was already a lost case.

"I know, and I am so sorry but I have to keep this job," Maritza planted a kiss on Axel's head. "Be good to your auntie Belén, okay?"

"Yes!" Axel clapped his hands and looked up to Belén. "Are we going to play games?"

Belén gave Maritza a brief look. "I don't think I have much of a choice."

"Sorry," Maritza gave her a quick hug then hurried away.

Belén backed Axel into the foyer so she could close the door. She yawned and turned around, looking down to Axel again. "Well, since I clearly won't be coming into work today, how's about we get more sleep? Nap time?"

Axel nodded his head and pretended to yawn, clapping his small hand over his mouth repeatedly. "I'm so tired..."

Belén chuckled and headed for the staircase. "You are such a good liar, Axel. But I swear to God if you draw on my face someone's not getting their chocolate milk later on."

~ 0 ~

Early morning turned into noon, and when Tony Woodward's case was turned over to the state Barry thought it suitable to find his friend whom he had offended the previous night. Now, his first idea on where to find her was her work…

Once more, he came across a stumped, and genuinely upset, Linda Parker.

"I love her, I really do," Linda was saying as she took a seat on the edge of her desk, "but she's not acting very professional like. She hasn't been back long enough to keep coming in late. Not to mention the fact she's about to miss her deadline this week because she keeps ditching a co-worker?"

Throughout this, Barry was guiltily listening to the woman go on and on...knowing that each time Belén had mysteriously disappeared had been because of him. "Listen, Linda, Bells is just going through some stuff," Barry began cautiously.

"I get it," Linda raised her hands, "Girl hasn't had it easy this year. But work is work. She can't keep doing this."

"She won't," Barry assured, promising himself that he would start being more mindful of the actions he took that would inevitably lead Belén into more trouble. "I'm...I'm gonna go talk to her…"

"Please do," Linda sighed and got off her desk. "I can't keep protecting her from the major bosses around here. Larkin has an attitude..."

Barry nodded. As soon as he could, he said goodbye to Linda and went to Belén's house. Knocking several times, he waited impatiently, and rather nervously. She probably had half a mind to slam the door on his face when she saw him standing there. Well, he wasn't the fastest man alive for nothing. He would have to keep the door open just enough to make his apology and hope for the best. Yes, that what he needed to do.

But, he was heavily surprised when Belén opened up and did nothing of the sort.

"Barry? What are you doing here?" she instead asked calmly, like their spat hadn't existed.

"You didn't come into work today and...I thought that was my fault…" Barry slowly explained, still wondering what she was planning on doing because so far her face had maintined completely at ease. Was this some sort of girl trick? Iris did it often with him when they were kids...and it was not fun!

"Don't flatter yourself, Barry," Belén chuckled a bit before gasping, "Oh my God I didn't mean to sound mean! S-sorry! I...I didn't...didn't really...sorry," it was her turn to be nervous. "Was that mean?"

"Bells, I...I thought you were mad at me, not the other way around."

"Oh, and you thought…?" Belén smiled and shook her head. "I was mad at you for a bit, then I got home and started thinking...and then I realized 'what the hell am I mad about? You were right'. Leaving Central City the way I did was completely rushed and stupid, no matter how logical I thought it was afterwards."

"I still had no right throwing that in your face," Barry sighed. "You were right about me - I shouldn't have gone out after Tony like that. It was stupid."

"But you did it for Iris, someone you consider your sister. If someone had done the same to my sister or brother, you bet your ass I would've gone after them no matter what."

"Still, I'm really sorry for what I said. It shouldn't have been said, period."

"Yeah, but I wouldn't stop my mouth and you were already pretty injured and frustrated so really this is still my fault and I should be apologizing so you shouldn't-"

"Bells breathe," Barry had to interrupt when he saw parts of her face going purple from lack of oxygen intake. Belén blushed and took in her needed air.

"Sorry," she apologized meekly.

There was a strange noise coming from the inside and while Barry didn't directly ask, he leaned slightly forwards. "Am I interrupting?"

"I'm literally just netflixing right now. Cisco's got me with the Walking Dead," Belén chuckled. "Well…" she motioned to be followed inside.

As Barry shut the door and followed her out of the foyer, he heard several distinct noises of a...gurgle? Was that a gurgle? Oh, there was a giggle too.

"Axel stop gurgling your milk and swallow it," Belén scolded when she walked into the living room.

"I like the sound," Axel called from the couch. He was very focused on a tablet he held but noticing his aunt had not come alone, he lowered the tablet for a moment. "Auntie Belén, Mommy says I can't talk to strangers..."

"Right," Belén pushed her hair behind her ears and motioned Barry to follow her again. "Barry, this is my nephew, Axel. He's the reason I didn't show up to work today."

"I told Mommy I didn't need a babysitter," Axel said in such a serious state that both Belén and Barry laughed.

"Axel, be nice and greet Barry," Belén motioned the boy to get up from the couch.

The small boy sighed but never got up. Instead, he let go of the tablet just to wave a hand at Barry then reach for the cup of milk he had on the coffee table. "Auntie Belén I'm watching Toy Story. Sh!" he then grabbed the small Woody doll beside him.

Belén made a face then turned to Barry. "As you can see, I'm very busy today."

Barry chuckled. "Right. Um, and he's...he's Maritza's son, right?" he vaguely recalled meeting Maritza and the small boy at Jitters.

"Yeah, my only nephew in the city," Belén shrugged. "And he's definitely worth the shouts Larkin will give me later."

"Big boss?"

"Big boss."

"Yeah, Belén, about your job...I'm sorry I've been causing problems there too-"

"Barry, please don't even worry about that," Belén waved a hand. "Just promise me next time you won't go into a fight where they can kill you without a proper plan first."

"I can do that," Barry nodded his head.

"Thank you, on behalf of all of us at STAR Labs," Belén rolled her eyes. "You're free to go without any guilt."

"U-uh, actually, I, um...you know," Barry decided to just start over again, "I've yet to catch up on zombies too…"

Belén followed his gesture to the television and blinked rapidly. "Oh...do you want to stay and watch with me?" she glanced back at him. "Of course, if you don't mind Axel. He's very shy when it comes to new people. Although he didn't have that problem with Iris - he frikin loves her."

Axel looked up with a big smile on his face. "Iris makes good chocolate milk."

"I taught her how to do that..." Barry said, leaning over the back of the couch.

Axel shifted so that he faced Barry. "Did you really?"

"Oh yeah, Iris and I grew up together so we taught each other a lot of things. She's like my sister, you know."

"Are you annoying?" the boy suddenly asked.

"Axel!" Belén scolded immediately while Barry laughed.

Axel simply looked between the two adults without realizing what he did. "My Daddy used to say that his big brother was annoying. Mommy said that uncle Rayan was annoying too. That's why I don't want to be a brother - I don't want to be annoying either." And without waiting to be scolded, Axel re-positioned himself on the couch and grabbed the tablet still playing his Toy Story movie.

"Barry, I'm sorry about that," Belén cleared her throat, obviously feeling bad for that bit.

"He's funny, I like him," Barry finished his laughter and moved around the couch. "And to answer the question, Iris was the annoying one, not me!"

"Now I'm telling," Belén playfully warned him as she went to sit down as well.

~ 0 ~

"This is definitely gross, I don't want to keep going," Belén cringed over and over as she saw blood spilling from a character's limb. She was glad that Axel had fallen asleep earlier. Despite being four years old, Axel seemed to like scary movies and whatnot. Maritza always said he got it from his father.

"Then why you'd watch it in the first place?" asked Barry who seemed to be studying the television rather than being entertained.

"For Cisco!"

"And what did we learn today?"

Belén groaned and threw her head back against the couch. "I can't watch..."

"You can definitely tell it's fake, though. The blood's not even the right color! Heck, barely anything on the show seems real!"

"It's a show-" Belén tried to remind but Barry was too excited to stop there.

"Look-" Barry shifted on his seat, eyes scanning the current scene on the television screen, "-it's a known fact that, technically, these zombies would have decomposed within like...a year, maybe a year and a half. Zombies in hot and humid places would have had their skin practically melting in weeks! They would literally be skeletons and maybe even just heads on the grounds. Plus, if zombies can turn you with a bite or a scratch then wouldn't that mean that nearly everyone would have been turned when they got blood on them? I'm talking about, you know, when someone stabs a zombie over and over and the blood splatters on their faces. One drop of blood in your system and you're..." he trailed off when he saw Belén staring at him with the widest of smiles. He was now aware of the mega rambling he'd done and suddenly felt his face warm up with embarrassment.

"Do you always get so analytical when you're watching TV shows?" Belén tried her best not to laugh.

"I-I tend...to do that...a lot...sorry," Barry shook his head. "It's kind of why Iris doesn't like watching television with me."

"I can see that. I mean, we watch television we mostly just...watch," Belén chuckled. "But when you watch television, you go on some other level...like a...like a 'Barry-level' that only you can reach."

Barry tilted his head at her, seeming completely offended. "What? I have a level now?"

"I think you always had a level," Belén nodded. "I should talk to Iris about it, maybe she already gave it a name."

"I have a level?"

"Yes."

"No I don't."

"Yes, you do."

"Belén!"

"Barry!"

There passed a long minute in which nothing was said and only stares were exchanged. Barry was just not amused and Belén was trying her best to suppress her smile that was already leaving noticeable traces on her lips.

"So, I have a level?" Barry finally began again, and when Belén nodded he quickly asked, "Why do I have a level?"

"Because," Belén let loose just a blip of her real laughter, "you look at the details no one else would. Take me for example," she gestured to herself. "When I watch a show, I don't go looking to see if the blood is the right color. I just go 'oh look, they're bleeding' and then move on."

"But how can you do that!?" Barry exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air.

"Because I'm just watching TV, Barry!" Belén said matter-of-factly, and giggled. Barry exhaled in resignation and shook his head. "Maybe it's just the fact you're a forensic," she added after feeling a little guilty, "You're trained to analyze things. It's just your custom."

"It's an annoying custom, or so I've been told," Barry muttered.

"No it's not, it's...interesting," Belén shrugged, "And kind of funny, not gonna lie. You get so into it - and excited too! You stay like that, alright? It's just part of you being an adorable nerd."

The last sentence had Barry in a mixture of flush and sadness. Belén saw that quick and sobered from her playfulness.

"I said something wrong didn't I? I...I didn't mean to-"

"It's not your fault," Barry said grimly, "Those words just sounded a lot like something Iris would say."

"Probably where I got them, to be honest," Belén mumbled and then spoke louder for him. "Why don't you talk to her? We can continue watching this some other day. It's obvious you miss her and this whole petty fight is just hurting both of you."

"I can't Bells…"

"Yes, you can," Belén said sharply. "Last time I checked, your sibling wasn't kidnapped or anything. She's probably at home right now...which is where you need to be." With that, she got up from the couch. "I have to bring Axel upstairs. When I come back, I would hope to see a little note from you-" she made a gesture of a squared note in the air that did, eventually, make Barry lighten up with a smile, "-saying you listened to my advice and went to see Iris."

She collected Axel from the other couch and headed for the stairs where. It would've made her feel good to know that Barry was planning on following her advice if it hadn't been for the phone call that he answered just as he had stood up from the couch to leave.

"Barry?" Belén had made a scowling face at him when she returned, though in his defense he had his back to her which didn't let him see it. "What are you still doing here? I know I was being a little sarcastic but I did mean for you to go to Iris and-"

"He took her," Barry turned around, angry yet completely terrified. "Tony took her right out of the house!"

"Wh-what?" Belén froze in her tracks. "Well...well...we gotta...we gotta do something! We, um, Star Labs, yeah! They can help us right?"

He nodded and made way for the doors. "I called Caitlin and Cisco, told them about it and they're working on it. This time he has to go down, I have to take him down."

"Not with that super punch you're not," Belén was coming right behind him. "Caitlin said you would break every bone in your body!"

"If I don't have another way then I'll have to take it!"

"I need to be with you so you don't have to do that awful option!"

"Bells!" They were now at the doorway, and Barry had turned around to remind her of her situation. "You have Axel upstairs, remember?"

Belén glanced back at the staircase with a thoughtful stare. "Well, he's only four. It's not like Maritza's gonna believe him if he says anything about you. Plus, he loves Cisco, so he'll be fine."

"Bells…"

"If you don't speed us there in the next minute I'll take back the 'adorable nerd' compliment I gave you."

"That was supposed to be a compliment?"

"Barry!"

"Fine!"

~ 0 ~

It only took another hour or so to get a clue of Iris' whereabouts. It appeared Tony had taken her back to their old school and somehow, mysteriously, there had been a report of a fire alarm going off in that building. The group assumed it had been a sign from Iris' part trying to signal her location. Smart girl because it worked.

"Okay, but how do you intend on taking him on?" Belén asked, for what the others counted as the tenth time.

"Fighting, clearly," Barry didn't want to be rude to her but at the moment his patience was low because Iris was off somewhere with an incredibly dangerous metahuman.

"That's not a plan!"

"She's not wrong," then came Belén's backup, Caitlin. The bioengineer sat at the desk concerningly preparing the computer to monitor Barry's future movements with the suit. "The idea of this sonic...punch, is completely a 'what if'."

"Well then hopefully we won't have to use it," Barry said his last sentence before speeding out of the building.

Belén looked at the remaining others with a straight face. "He's gonna have to use it, won't he?"

"The chances are very high," even Dr. Wells had to admit.

"Then someone should be there to make sure he has a better chance," Belén walked towards the desk.

"Hey, hey, hey!" Cisco exclaimed as Belén placed down her nephew on the chair between Cisco and Caitlin.

"Look after him, please?"

"I don't need a babysitter!" Axel grumbled but was not acknowledged.

"Bells, this isn't a good idea," Cisco earnestly said. "You haven't seen this guy, alright? You haven't even tested your own powers completely-"

"I've tested them enough," Belén made sure to look at everyone whilst saying that. "I've trained with the Arrow, with the Canary, and I think I've learned enough to go out there. You're going to have to excuse me but you've only seen a glimpse of what I've learned to do." And Belén thought that was an understatement. There was a side even she hadn't really seen and wasn't very interested to.

"He's dangerous," Caitlin reminded meekly, though knew this was a lost case.

"I know, and strong. Look, I'm not going to go in to punch him. You're right, at one point, Barry will have to do that stupid sonic thing and when he does, I'd like to make sure this Tony is already weakened."

"What do you mean by that?" Caitlin furrowed her eyebrows.

"Well, Tony might be metal but he doesn't stop having human lungs," Belén smirked.

"I don't have your suit ready," Cisco said as a last resort to get her to stay back, but he shoould've known better. Belén was a journalist - they persisted until the end.

"I've still got my original outfit," she winked and ran off.

"Where is auntie Belén going?" Axel was left asking but none of the adults could come up with a good answer for a four year old.

~ 0 ~

Iris was completely terrified as she watched from her spot on the ground as the Streak (tentative name, she noted) fought against her deranged kidnapper. She was frozen on her spot, thinking if she moved she would perhaps get in the way. But then just like that, in the middle of the fight, the Streak sped out.

Smugly, Tony glanced back at Iris. "There goes your hero."

Iris was well overconfused, but she said nothing. Then, out of nowhere, several pink Azaleas dropped and formed a neat circle around Tony.

"What the…" Tony looked down at the flowers and had a mini-laugh, "...what's this?"

"Over here," came the order of a modulated voice. Iris perked up when she recognized the voice.

He looked ahead and saw a woman in a green leather jacket that faded into pink, and matching pants. "Buddy of the coward I assume? Well, your little flowers aren't gonna do much for you sweetheart."

Belén keenly listened to the earpiece for a status on her time before speaking again. "Do you know what Azaleas can mean sometimes? Death."

"What? And you're gonna kill me with them?" Tony was close to laughing again.

Belén felt something in the pit of her stomach while the man laughed. She flexed her hands, not needing to even look at them to know they were sporting green blotches. She fought against it, pushing it away and focusing on the little time she had left until Barry would return. "I'm not a murderer, I'm a partner." She extended a hand towards Tony and turned her palm over. A bright pink Azalea formed at the center of her hand and released what looked to be like pollen into the air. "Azaleas, while beautiful, are quite poisonous." Tony began to cough as he felt something prick at his throat. "It's not enough to kill you, don't worry. I've learned the correct amount to weaken someone." The flowers around Tony were now opening up and releasing the same pollen into the air around him. Belén calmly walked around Tony who was coughing violently and stumbling. She stopped by Iris and helped her up. "We need to move!"

"What-" Iris barely had time to say when Belén yanked her to the side.

It had been a well calculated moment because a mere two seconds later Barry reappeared, faster than ever, and in a great leap his hand collided with Tony's face...creating the perfect sonic punch.

Barry fell back against the lockers and Tony staggered back, completely disoriented. Belén mumbled a 'stay here' to Iris and hurried up to where Tony had landed to deliver a final punch that would knock Tony out for real. She then made the Azalea pollen from the air disappear before Iris got a whiff of it.

"Nice one," Barry remarked after a moment, still feeling rather weak. "But what are you doing here?"

"Helping your ass, what else?" Belén couldn't help chuckle then glanced back to Iris who was slowly coming forwards, looking shaken up. "You'll be fine now, we promise."

Iris nodded, her fear slowly fading and replacing with awe as she looked at the two heros. As bad as it may have sounded to anyone else, this was the closest she'd ever gotten to either of them.

~ 0 ~

When Tony awoke he found himself in the small containment pod in the pipeline that would become his new home. "Hey! What is this? Where the hell am I?"

"Somewhere you'll never hurt anyone ever again."

Tony got up and pounded on the glass door that turned out not to be as fragile as he thought after putting up with several of his steel punches. "Who the hell do you think you are?"

Barry stepped out from the shadowy archway and allowed Tony to see who he was in reality. "You know who I am."

"Allen?" Tony went in a momentary stupor.

"The thing that happened to you, Tony, it happened to me too, but it didn't just give us abilities. It made us more of who we are. You got strong. I got fast. Fast enough to beat you. You used your gift to hurt people. Not anymore."

"Allen. Allen. Allen, don't walk away from me, Allen!"

Barry stepped back and let Tony be promptly shut up in the pipeline. Once the door was fully shut, he whirled around and did some sort of victory dance that everyone else in the room decided to ignore for the best.

"Dude, that had to feel great," Cisco laughed alongside him.

"You have no idea," Barry nodded his head.

"Almost as good as proving us wrong about the supersonic punch?" Caitlin asked with crossed arms.

"Actually, that part hurt. Like, a lot," Barry looked at his fist that was already healed...lucky him.

"I hate that you heal faster than me," Belén glumly looked at her gauzed up hand.

"Nobody said you had to punch him afterwards," Barry couldn't help laugh at her face.

"Excuse me for coming to help you!"

Barry sobered and gave her a light smile. "Well thanks."

"Okay," Cisco clapped his hands together as they headed out, "I need to know which childhood bully we are gonna take down next? Mine or Caitlin's?"

"Seriously, Cisco?" Belén gave him a sharp look.

"What? Oh, right, I forgot little miss adorable didn't have any bullies," Cisco made a faceand earned a whack on the arm.

"I told you people just liked me! It's not my fault!"

"Sure," and she was surprised that it came out of all three of her friends' mouths.

"You're all just…" Belén scrunched her nose as she thought of something to say, "...big nerds! You're just nerds and you're jealous because I never had someone pick on me." She left them very amused as she went ahead to go collect her nephew. It was getting late and she knew it was only time before Maritza would arrive at the house.

"Dr. Wells I am so sorry," she quickly apologized when she walked into the cortex room, "It took longer than expected to put Tony away."

"Don't worry, I assumed Barry had to have a couple minutes to gloat to him," Wells shot the said man a look as the others came in.

"I did not gloat," Barry said proudly.

"No, he just danced," Belén cleared her throat and suppressed a laugh. She moved to the chair where Axel had been left at, the boy babbling to himself while he scribbled over a worn out journal. "What are you doing there, Axel?"

"Drawing," he said distractedly, not even glancing at her.

"He's very interested in the technology around," Wells gestured to the computers and screens on the wall.

"Oh, he gets that from his uncle Rayan. He used to let Axel use one of those drawing programs on a tablet." At that moment, her phone went off and she didn't need to answer to know who was the caller - she had seen the time. "Maritza's at home and I need to get there fast…" she eyed the speedy metahuman, "...up for one last trip?"

"Always," Barry nodded and moved forwards.

"Uh, Bells, I know this is probably ridiculous to ask but don't you think Axel might mention something about all this-" Cisco gestured to the room as well as Barry and herself, "-to Maritza?"

"Don't worry Cisco," Belén had picked up her nephew into her arms, "Maritza would never believe it."

"I'm not telling," Axel hopped off chair and snagged his paper with his newest drawing. "I can keep secrets too." He quickly looked at Barry with big eyes. "I won't tell, I promise!"

"We believe you," Barry reassured him but silently concluded that Belén was right. Even if Axel accidentally let it slip that he was the Streak, Maritza would never buy it.

"Hey Axel," Cisco came by the boy wearing a suspicious smirk Belén was already not liking, "Sonic?"

"Boom!" Axel threw his hands into the air and giggled, much to the dismay of everyone else in the room.

"I cannot believe you taught my nephew this," Belén playfully scolded Cisco for that but the man was busy high-fiving with Axel to care. "Barry, get us out of here!"

Barry thought it would be a good idea since she looked close to hurting Cisco. As they approached Belén's house, they could see Maritza's car already in the driveway.

"I'm gonna need a good excuse," Belén said as they walked down the sidewalk.

"She won't buy the one where you say you were 'out with friends'?" Barry made a face at her.

She turned to him with an amused smile. "Maritza is very delicate when it comes to her son - especially since she lost her husband. But don't worry, your name nor anyone at STAR Labs will not come up."

"Why don't I go in with you and we make up some excuse together?"

"That's very sweet of you but I would rather you went to go find Iris. You have spent all day with me and frankly it makes me feel guilty."

"Guilty?"

"Iris is your best friend, your sister, your family, I don't think it's right that you ignore her and do it by spending your entire day with me. Iris is also my friend, a really close friend whom I completely love. I feel like I'm betraying her by not helping this icky fight between you both."

"Okay," Barry gave in rather easily after hearing her logic. Truth be told he didn't feel well with himself either. More than anything he wanted to fix things with Iris and get back to normal. Ignoring her probably wasn't helping.

"Thank you for today," Belén said softly. "I can't wait to see everything back to normal tomorrow."

"As much as it can with all these metahumans?"

"Yes," Belén laughed, "As much as it can be with all these metahumans."

"What's a 'metahuman'?" Axel looked up at them both, curiously.

"We're going to talk before we go back to your Mom, okay...?" Belén said back, nervously smiling at Barry while motioning him to get going.

"Good luck," Barry told her before leaving.

"Good luck to you," Belén felt the need to say back. When he was gone, Belén took Axel by the hand and slowly walked for the house so that she could come up with a good story on what to tell Maritza.

[mx-jinxous]

Coldflash as dysney films

I wasn’t sure if you meant a specific one or if you just wanted a Disney themed one so I did Peter Pan au.

When Barry had been born he was created from the Leonard Snart’s first laugh. He hadn’t expected much from this life he’d been given and yet he’d been given a whole world. The first time Barry had met Len was the day that Len had turned 12 Barry had decided he wanted to meet the child he owes his existence to. What he’d expected was a boy having fun with a mom and dad, living happily, but instead, Len was stuck with an abusive father and no mother. Barry knew he had to protect Len, that night he’d confronted Len, Barry would never forget the sounds of Len crying in bed. So Barry whisked Len away, taking him home to Neverland, and Barry never wanted to see that smile disappear from Len’s face. From that day on they were best friends, family, slowly building a family of kids in Len’s situation, named proudly as the lost boys. They played every day, no cares or worries, never aging as they smiled and lived happily.

They spent centuries together, Barry caring for Len, feeding him, teaching him. All they needed was one another and the small family they had, they were never apart. That all changed when Barry had let Len fly farther than he had before, chasing his shadow. That’s how he met Sara Lance, a spunky girl that Barry tried not to like, solely because she was trying to persuade Len to come to earth, back to a world that didn’t deserve him. So the night before Barry was to take Sara back to her world the two had sat down, away from the woman. The sat in their huts, Barry brushing Len’s hair, freshly washed and shiny, Barry planning to take a bath later to get the dirt out of his golden locks.

“Don’t you think that maybe the world has changed, people are better?” Len asked as he looked at the wall.

“I don’t think it has, humans can be scary creatures, there are people worse than your dad,” Barry said, bopping Len on the nose, treating him as if he was the only child here.

“But Sara has told me of things called cell phones, you can keep in touch with people from far away. I could talk to you always.” At this Barry stopped brushing, looking at Len.

“You really want to go back to a world undeserving of you because of what, a girl?”

“Well...she’s cute and nice, but she can’t stay here. She said I could live with her family, and I’ll have pixie dust so I can visit you whenever.”

“Is she more important than us? Our family?” Barry asked tears in his eyes.

“Our family has no girls, I like girls. I love you Bare, but I want to go home for a little bit.” Len said, grabbing Barry’s hand.

“This is home! Human’s will only hurt you, they’re horrible creatures that will get tired of you!” Barry yelled, pulling his hand away, bright blue eyes glaring at Len. The preteen looked at him surprised, Barry had never yelled at him, they were never really angry at each other.

“I’m ready to go on my own adventure, you don’t have to go, you can trust me,” Len said, Barry, standing.

“You’re not going! That’s final! Hate me if you want, but I’m doing what I always do, protect you! Once she’s gone you’ll realize how dumb this is!” Barry yelled, walking over to his makeshift bed, a hammock above Len’s bed. They spent the rest of the night, not speaking, Len just staring at Barry with worried eyes. Before long Barry had nodded off, waking when the sun shone in through exposed pieces of the hut, hitting his face. Barry stretched his wings, rolling onto his stomach, looking over his hammock to see Len. When he was met with an empty bed Barry climbed out of his hammock, walking outside to see the fairies fluttering around, playing with the lost boys. Looking around for Len Barry planned out a fun day after taking Sara back. Peaking into her hut Barry expected to see Len and her talking or something, but when he saw that no one was there he got concerned. He rounded up the lost boys, asking where Len was, all of them avoiding eye contact.

They broke down easily, telling Barry that Len had left with Sara. Furious Barry stomped back to his hut, planning to fly to earth and drag Len back home, but as his wings started fluttering the fell. Looking back Barry's eyes widened, the glow of his skin fading, Barry’s eyes going wide. The realization set over him as the tears poured from his eyes, Barry covering his eyes. Len chose Sara over him, he didn’t need Barry anymore, the magic gone. Falling to his earth floor Barry let out a scream filled with ache and pain, the sound echoing over the village, the other fairies fluttering in. They comforted Barry, but the fairy laid in their arms, crying his eyes out, staring at Len’s empty bed. When the tears stopped and the fairies had helped Barry to bed the fairy was left alone, cuddling into the pillow that had Len’s scent on it, the tears coming back. Barry stayed quiet letting his tears run from his puffy red eyes, waiting.

Len woke up cuddling his bed sheets, the sun had not risen yet, stretching as he opened his eyes slowly to see an empty spot next to him. Frowning he turned onto his back, to look at the ceiling, the plain white serving as a dull reminder of his lonely and dull life. Sure he had made something of himself when he’d left Neverland, he’d written stories about his friends and his life, naming the boy Peter Pan. He never could write about Barry though, it was hard, leaving after their fight with little to no note, just the lost boys as the messenger. What hurt the most though, Len thinks, is that Barry never came after him, deep down inside Len believed he’d loved him enough to come after him. Looking over at his nightstand Len looked at the bottle of pixie dust he’d managed to swipe, enough to visit Barry, Len had been meaning to, but then he thought about how Barry probably felt about him.

For 12 years Len pushed it off, using that excuse to do it, and at first, it worked, but after five years Len knew it was ridiculous. Len had left to be with Sara, at first as a friend and then later something else, that lasted for a couple years. When they broke up Len was a teenager, something he’d never expected to happen with his body, would Barry even know him. Both he and Sara had some discovery about themselves, which might be part of why they didn’t work out.

Sighing Len sat up, grabbing the bottle. He stared at it, the last bit of Neverland, he could always grab more, but could he really do that to everyone, to Barry. Grow older, then one day never come back, and he was past the age limit in Neverland, the couldn’t possibly take him back. Sure Len wanted to visit earth, but he’d never meant to stay to the point, but he got scared of what Barry would have done when he came back. Only now Len knows how stupid that was, Barry was a sweetheart and Len never deserved him. Swallowing Len made his decision, climbing out of bed, walking to the roof of his apartment.

He hadn’t bothered to change out of his t-shirt and plaid blue pajama pants, or even put shoes on. As he stood on top of the building, holding the dust in his hands Len gave another swallow, hoping pixie dust didn’t expire. Lifting it over his head he dumped it over his body, breathing in deeply Len shook, stepping closer to the edge. “Come on Len, you know how it goes. Faith, trust, and pixie dust.” He mumbled, giving a leap. At first, he felt gravity pulling him to the street below, then it was gone, Len opening his eyes to look around, looking up at the night sky. Smiling he saw where he needed to go, remembering it from the first time Barry had taken him. “Second star on the right, straight on until morning.” Len smiled, flying toward the sky.

It didn’t take long before he saw morning, but it wasn’t earth's, no it was Neverlands, Len could never forget the rainbow sky that hardly disappeared, only to reappear. He smiled wide, he felt at home here, of course, the earth was never home to him, Neverland was...Barry was. His heartbeat sped up, scared to see Barry, of course, he was a grown man and Barry would look like a 12-year-old just like he had. He shivered as he landed outside the village, looking between the brushes, seeing the fairies ever the same. They flew around, doing chores, hopping after them was one of the lost boys, Mick. They were always troublemakers together when Len had plotted something he knew Barry would shut down he would, and he was still a kid, Len feeling like an outsider. Moving his foot he snapped a twig, Mick looking his direction in a second, drawing his wooden sword. Stepping back Len was going to make a break for it, but before he could Len was tripped, two other lost boys on him...literally though, they sat on him. Looking up he was met with Hartley and Cisco, Mick jumping down on Len’s stomach, effectively pinning him down.

“Who are you?!” He growled, jamming the wooden sword into Len’s chin.

“Chill out hot head, going to give me a splinter,” Len grumbled, this time getting thwacked on the head.

“How’d you get here!? Grown-ups aren’t allowed in Neverland, especially not in the Hollow.”

“Second star to the right, straight on until morning. Not even old friends Heatwave.” Len smirked seeing Mick’s face drop at the nickname, looking at the stranger to figure out how he knew his nickname. It took a second but realization came over Mick’s face, Len smiling, only the be hit again with the wooden sword.

“Numbskull! You got us all in trouble taking off like that. You’re so old now.” Mick grumbled, Hartley and Cisco seeming to have caught on as they backed off of Len.

“I’m only 24, you dweeb.”

“That’s still a long time gone. Neverland’s not been the same.” Hartley mumbled, playing with the ears of his onesie.

“I didn’t mean to be gone so long, I was going to come back in like a year, honest. It just got away from me before I knew it. I was hoping to see everyone again, see Barry again. Is he still terribly mad still?” Len asked, the boy's faces immediately dropping, concerning Len. “What?”

“Barry wasn’t the same after you left. He still in the same hut if you want to go see him.”

“Yeah, I’ll catch up with you guys I promise,” Len said as he sat up, crawling around the village to a familiar hut, a smile coming to Len’s face. Even if he was terrified he was still excited. Sneaking in he looked around the room, nothing having changed. It was then he saw someone wrapped up in his old blanket, curled up on his old bed. “Barry?” He whispered the figure shivered. Len proceeded sitting beside the person on the bed. “Bare is that you?”

“Yeah.” Barry groaned turning to face Len, his eyes closed, but the only exposed from the blanket.

“Hey Bare, you remember me right?” At this Barry cracked his eyes, staring at Len, the man started getting concerned, maybe Barry had outgrown him.

“You came back?” Barry mumbled, Len, noticing the blue eyes were hazel brown, Len taking note of what he could see, which isn't much.

“I came home. It’s been a little bit longer than I expected.” Len said, pulling the blanket back. The first thing he noticed was that Barry’s body barely radiated, then he noticed that Barry was older, his hair no longer the bright blonde it had once been, and he was older now like Len.

“Bare, what happened? Where’s your light?”

“It left when you did. You didn’t need me anymore if it wasn’t for the lost boys I’m sure it would have been gone.” Barry mumbled, Len, looking at his friend, the most important person to him in the world.

“Just because I wanted to leave didn’t mean I didn’t want you. I still believe in you.” Len said, pulling Barry into his lap, the fairy so light.

“What was Earth-like?” Barry asked weak hand cupping Len’s cheek, the older having tears running down his face.

“It wasn’t what you thought, there are good people, but you weren’t wrong.”

“How long until you go back?” Barry asked, Len, shaking his head.

“What can I do Bare. I don’t want your light to go out, I need you still. I need my best friend in the whole universe.”

“Shu. It’s okay. Don’t cry Snowflake.” Len smiled, cuddling against Barry.

“Please, Barry. I believe in you. I need you in my life, I need you.”

“But you don’t, you’ve grown up into a great young man. You don’t need a babysitter, let's be honest I was never one of the guys, I was the nanny.” Barry smiled, head rested against Len’s chest.

“No, I love you, you are so much more to me Bare. Just because I’ve grown up doesn’t mean I don't need you. I never stopped thinking about you, I missed you every day. I was always waiting for you to come get me. No matter what it’s just us, Bare and Len at it again, a few years older but still young.” Barry smiled, closing his eyes.

“Nap time.” He mumbled, Len, holding him tight in his arms.

“I won’t leave your side, just get better,” Len mumbled, curling up with Barry, a smirk on his face. “So you’ve gotta get better so we can go play in the fairy garden, go see Lisa and the tribe.”

Barry smiled, looking up at Len. “I thought you left Neverland because our family doesn’t have girls.” Barry chuckled.

“Lisa’s like a sister, plus I don’t like girls like I thought,” Len said, Barry, smiling wide.

“Really now. What do you like if not girls.” Barry chuckled, Len, smiling down at him.

“Get your glow back and I’ll tell you,” Len said, holding onto Len tight.

“Was I a good fairy?” Barry asked, hands tucked against his chest.

“You’re still the best,” Len said resting his chin on Barry's head. “I need you still Barry, I need you to be in my life. Please believe in me like I believe in you Scarlet.” Len mumbled, catching the glitter of Barry’s wings, the younger staying quiet. A smile came to Len’s face, swallowing. “I love you, Scarlet. I promise I will never leave again.”

“You’ve got another family somewhere Len, I won’t force you to stay.”

“My choice, after all this is my family right here,” Len said, grasping Barry’s hands. “You are my family, you protected me from a world that could hurt me, let me return the favor, just believe in me.”

“I believe in you Len, but how can I believe in myself. You didn’t want to stick around.”

“I was adventurous, I still am. If I remember correctly you owed me a tour of the mermaid lagoon again.” Len said, Barry, smirking, but again kept silent. “So believe in us Scarlet and I will be with you till the end. We can be our old trouble makers.”

“You got the old part right,” Barry said, snickering, cuddling up against.

“That’s your fault,” Barry said, Len, watching him as his skin lightly glow. A smile came to his face, watching as Barry finally managed to nod off, Len taking the moment to be grateful for his fairy, he had everything because of Barry, now it was Len’s turn to take care of Barry.

[singledarkshade]

Settling In

Part Twenty-One – Home Comforts “What are you doing here?”

Rip looked up from his computer at Cisco’s demand, “This is my office.”

Cisco rolled his eyes, “I thought you took all week off since your mom is visiting?”

“Mother and Clarissa are having lunch. I wasn’t invited,” Rip told him, “I thought I would come and check in to make sure you haven’t destroyed anything.”

“Nothing has blown up for three weeks,” Cisco rolled his eyes, “And last time it was Harry’s fault.”

Rip chuckled.

“So,” Cisco dropped into the spare seat, “How’re things going having your mom staying with you?”

“It’s wonderful,” Rip replied, smiling amused at Cisco look of disbelief, “What? I do actually like my mother being here.”

“It’s just nice to see you so open about someone other than Jonas,” Cisco replied with a smile, “We should have had Sara bring her here a long time ago.”

Rip rolled his eyes at his friend, “Don’t you have work to do?”

“Waiting for some things to finish,” Cisco replied, “Saw you here. Thought you might want to go for lunch?”

Rip shrugged, “Sure.”

 Jonas, along with his best friend Adam, ran over to where Rip stood waiting for them grinning to find Cisco standing there too.

“Where’s Gran?” Jonas asked looking around.

Rip smiled, “She spent some time with Grandma today. We’re going to Grandma’s for dinner.”

“But it’s not Friday,” Jonas frowned slightly.

Rip chuckled, his son was very much a believer in his routine, “I know but remember this is a special week since we have Gran staying with us.”

“Okay,” Jonas shrugged.

Cisco chuckled, “Do you guys want to race me to the car?”

Jonas grinned, handing Rip his backpack who also took Adam’s.

“On your marks,” Cisco said, “Get set,” he reached out and held the boys by the shoulder before striding forward, “Go.”

“You cheated,” Jonas cried before scampering after his favourite uncle with Adam just behind them leaving Rip to follow on at a slower pace.

Rip reached the car to find Jonas celebrating apparently having won despite Cisco’s ‘cheating’. Ushering them both into the car Rip listened to Jonas and Adam tell Cisco all about their day at school. They quickly dropped Adam off at his house promising that the boys could play together for a few hours the next night as it was Friday.

Reaching Clarissa’s house Rip released his son watching him race inside to see his grandmothers.

  “Did you enjoy your day with Clarissa?” Rip asked his mother when she sat at his side after Jonas showed off his room to her.

Mary smiled, “I did. You don’t mind that I spent the day with her, do you?”

“No,” Rip assured her, “I’m glad you had time to get to know Clarissa. She has been wonderful to us since we moved here. Becoming Jonas’ grandmother and giving me someone to go to when I need help, I know how much I rely on her.”

Mary squeezed his hand, “And I am so relieved that you have Clarissa here for you, Michael. It’s comforting that when I have to go home I know I’m leaving my boy in the best situation possible.”

Rip ducked his head slightly at the affection.

“Where you are now, how old am I?” Rip asked suddenly.

“Fourteen,” Mary told him, “You’re at that stage where almost everything is met with sullen silence.”

Rip chuckled slightly, “I was quite a moody teenager. I’m hoping Jonas will be more like Miranda personality-wise.”

Mary smiled amused frowning concerned when Rip sighed, “What’s wrong, dear?”

“How do you do it?” Rip asked softly, “How do you raise me as a child knowing what’s coming without telling me or trying to change it?”

“Because I know that if I do anything to change your timeline I would lose not only you but all my children,” she reminded him, “Michael, if I’m not there to care for all of you then who knows who the Time Masters would put in my place. I know of other mothers who are loyal to them and not their charges. I have to protect my children, no matter what.”

Rip listened to this in silence.

“Why do you ask?” Mary queried.

Taking a deep breath Rip confessed, “I saw Miranda recently. She was on a training mission that she’d told me about once. I had to let her go. I let her go to her death because I could have lost Jonas.”

“Michael,” she rested her hand on his cheek soothing him, “You did the only thing you possibly could. Miranda would not want you to do anything to endanger your son’s existence.”

Rip dropped his head into her comforting hand, “It hurt so much.”

“I know, dear,” Mary continued to soothe, “I know because I watched you lose her at the same time I watched a boy in my care learn how to let me love him.”

Rip hugged her tightly, “I do love you, Mother. I know I never said it enough.”

“I’ve always known, Michael,” she replied.

                                  *********************************************

  Jonas crawled in beside Rip early on Saturday morning; since Mary was staying Jonas hadn’t spent the night at Clarissa’s as per a normal Friday night.

“Morning,” Rip sighed wincing when Jonas kicked him while he squirmed to get comfortable, “Is something wrong?”

Jonas shook his head, “I want a story.”

Rip glanced at the clock and grimaced at how early it was, “What about?”

“Mummy.”

“What brought this on?” Rip asked, rubbing his eyes to waken a little more.

Jonas shrugged, “Your mummy is here.”

Hugging his son Rip smiled slightly, “How about I tell you about the first time I took your Mummy out for dinner?”

Jonas nodded and cuddled close listening to the story, falling asleep before Rip finished.

“I always enjoyed that story,” Gideon said softly as Rip made sure Jonas was covered.

Rip frowned confused, “I’ve never told you about that.”

“Mrs Hunter did,” Gideon replied, “She told me many stories that you never have.”

“Of course she did,” Rip shook his head a smile playing on his lips.

“It is still early,” Gideon noted, “You should sleep for a few more hours.”

Cuddling his son Rip closed his eyes knowing his best friend was watching over them.

  Jonas took his Gran’s hand and walked her to the corner of the memorial garden where they had set-up the small statue for Miranda.

“I chose an angel because Mummy is now one,” Jonas explained to Mary, “Daddy chose the roses. He said they’re her favourite flowers.”

“They were,” Mary said as she placed the small bouquet she’d brought with her at the statue, “She always loved them, especially when she was carrying you, Jonas. She would sit in the garden filled with them and read to you.”

Jonas leaned against her, “I miss her.”

“I know, sweetie,” Mary soothed, glancing back to where her son stood waiting for them. Michael had stayed back today allowing Jonas to take her to see Miranda’s memorial, “She misses you too, I know that. You’re right she is an angel and she’s watching over you.”

Jonas smiled at her.

“Will we go and get some lunch?” Mary asked.

The little boy nodded and took her hand again to rejoin his father.

  Mary sat at the picnic table in the park watching her son chase his own around. Jonas giggled every time Michael caught him and swung the little boy around. It made her happy to see him so relaxed and full of joy playing with Jonas.

Even as a child Michael was never this free and she knew when she returned home this would be the memory she would hold onto. Especially when the younger version came to visit during that horrible time he believed Miranda and Jonas were taken from him.

She loved her children, loved all of them but only one had ever come back to see her after leaving.

Michael was, from the moment she met him, truly special. Deeply intelligent, he could make intuitive leaps like no other but trusted absolutely no one. It took her a long time to get him to open up even a little and much longer to stop him carrying a weapon everywhere he went.

Jonas ran over to her bringing Mary back to the park and she smiled at the little boy.

“Are you having fun, sweetheart?” Mary asked her grandson.

Jonas nodded.

“Well,” Mary glanced up at Michael when he joined them, “Since Clarissa invited us for dinner tomorrow night along with everyone else I thought we could make dessert. What do you think, Jonas? Will we make something special for everyone?”

Jonas nodded enthusiastically taking her hand while Michael gathered up their things before they headed to the car.

                                  *********************************************

  “You’re going to have to start bringing Cecile to family things, Joe,” Barry noted as he finished his third piece of cake.

Joe chuckled, “She’s still trying to get her head around you and Wally’s alter egos I think introducing her to everything else might be a little too much just now.”

“Like me and Gideon,” Rip noted amused.

Joe nodded, “Precisely.”

Rip glanced over to where his mother and Clarissa were talking before checking where Wally and Cisco were sitting playing the computer with Jonas.

“Are you okay?” Joe asked bringing Rip’s attention back to him.

Rip frowned confused, “Yes.”

“I know having Mary here has been good for you,” Joe noted, “It must be hard knowing she’s leaving soon.”

“It is,” Rip sighed softly, “Jonas has loved having her here too but at least I got to show her my new life. It was something I never thought I would get to do, to show her that I’m happy here.”

Joe smiled slightly as did Barry making Rip frown.

“What?”

“You know that’s the first time you’ve admitted you’re happy here,” Joe told him, “It’s nice to hear.”

Rip paused before he shrugged dropping his eyes slightly, “It’s thanks to all of you.”

“Well we’re happy to have you as part of our family,” Joe told him as Barry nodded in agreement.

  “I can never tell you how grateful I am to all of you,” Mary told Clarissa, looking over to where her son sat.

“For what?” Clarissa asked.

Mary smiled slightly, “For making sure Michael and Jonas have people they can turn to. I came here because I wanted to make sure my son was safe. I didn’t think I would find him so comfortable.”

“It wasn’t easy,” Clarissa laughed softly, “When he first came here Rip was so nervous about letting Jonas out of his sight and kept himself apart from everyone as much as possible. We didn’t let him.”

Mary chuckled, “Yes, you do have to beat him into submission with kindness sometimes,” she paused and smiled slightly, “When he first came to me he was exactly the same. Be very grateful you don’t have to check for little stores of food in his room. I swear I had mice at one point because of him.”

“He’s going to miss you,” Clarissa said, “They both are.”

Mary sighed sadly, “I have to return to my children. I have to get back to the stubborn teenager who will grow into the man sitting over there.”

“That must be so strange,” Clarissa mused, “Knowing his future and not being able to tell him.”

Mary nodded solemnly, “It’s hard but I know this is where he is heading. That he is happy, safe and has Jonas with him. I can leave comfortable in that knowledge.”

                                  *********************************************

  Tuesday arrived far too soon.

Mary had been pleased that it was a parents’ day at Jonas’ school the day before which meant she, along with Clarissa and Michael spent the afternoon finding out what the children were learning about.

Jonas had been so excited to have all three of them there and positively beamed with pride as he showed them everything he had been doing in school. Later that night, the three of them had a nice dinner together before Mary read to Jonas one last time.

Saying goodbye to Jonas that morning had been hard and Mary had hugged him tightly before letting him go to school.

After making her goodbyes to the members of the team in Star Labs, Mary joined her son and they headed to the roof of the building.

“Come here,” she ordered pulling her son into her arms hugging him tightly as he held onto her. She could feel his tears dropping onto her shoulder.

The arrival of the Jumpship signalled it was time for her to leave and Mary took her son’s face in her hands.

“Listen to me,” she told him, “I am so proud of you, Michael. Jonas is happy here and you have a new family who all care a great deal for you. I know how hard it always was for you to let people close and it’s good to know you managed to do so here.”

He shrugged slightly, “They didn’t give me a choice.”

Mary laughed softly, “I love you, dear. Never forget that.”

“I love you too, Mother,” Michael whispered.

  Rip watched the hatch to the ship open picking up his mother’s bags as Sara stepped out, wearing the exact same outfit she had been the last time he saw her.

“Not bad timing,” Rip teased slightly.

Sara rolled her eyes at him, “Like you could have done better.”

“Jumping an exact week is easy,” Rip replied with a grin before he headed into the ship placing his mother’s bags inside.

Sara shook her head sliding back into the pilot’s seat giving them a final moment to say goodbye.

Rip turned to his mother and hugged her one final time. Mary took his face in her hands and pulled him to her to kiss his forehead. She let him go and stepped into the ship leaving Rip standing alone.

Taking in a shuddering breath Rip watched his mother leave, surprised when someone placed a hand on his arm. Glancing to his side Rip found Cisco standing there.

Turning to his friend Rip suggested, “Lunch?”

[pinkletterday]

The Flash 5x4!!!

I am HYPED, you guys! FINALLY WE FIND OUT WHAT'S UP WITH MOMMA AND BABY.

Whatever it is Im going to deeply empathize with and love both of them.

Idk who this stupid af bitch is running straight into a blazing hail of fireballs and trying to take selfies but I hate her.

Iris. Iris. Baby. Hahahahaha Nora knows what a disaster her Mom is in the kitchen. I love you sfm Iris.

Hey Nora this version of your Mom just met you so hold back on the teenage sass, okay?

Ok this isnt funny anymore my heart is aching for Iris.

Young lady sit back down and eat that breakfast your Mom made for you.

"Make you a banana" lmaoooo this is why Barry does all the cooking. Gawd I love the domesticity.

I love that Iris can't cook. It just adds to her perfection. I guess I really am a fool in love, huh?

Oh God this guy. Shut up shut up shut up. Did this buffoon just call Cisco Ramon not brave???

I wish Ralph would take the lead here. That's right, I like Ralph now. This season is magic.

I would find this softball thing adorkable and hilarious if it wasn't for the fact that Barry is literally the Flash. It doesn't make a lick of sense. Would have been much more interesting if Barry had turned into a star athlete overnight and everyone just boggled.

Otoh it provides an interesting (read: hilarious) look at their dynamic growing up. Their different dorknesses cancel each other out.

I am irked. Why is the Flash a hopeless athlete? HE CATCHES KNIVES OUT OF THE AIR. How does he just switch off his co-ordination?

Kinda nice seeing all the ladies together like that though. Cecile is a gift.

NORA IS A GAY THIS IS NOT A DRILL WE HAVE A BABY QUEER IN THE HOUSE aaaaaand you are seriously trying my patience here. Be rude to your mother one more time. See how that goes.

Oooh Momma Bear is on the case! *hearteyes*

See, Baby Giraffe is already better at this than The Fraudulent Frenchie.

I hate to say it but based on that lumberjane chic I think we have another queer in the house. But this one we don't want.

Loool "like her size extra small". I hate to say it but thats a way better reason for her codename than "excess" ugh.

No it was different because she never knowingly put the people she was writing about in danger you asshat. God I wish you weren't so pretty.

Another black man wrongly accused. What up, America.

...Joe what. You guys. Jesse Martin looks bad. IS HE OKAY I AM SERIOUSLY CONCERNED.

Momma coaching Baby through speedster things! Because Barry taught her that one time she was a speedster. I can't handle this. My heart.

She FINALLY thanked her! Iris's smile.

My girls. I can't.

OMG SOMEONE REMEMBERS EARLY EDITION! I loved that show!

Also. Iris West, ace reporter, always better than fake hoes. Watch and learn, padawan.

Am sad we're not getting any Cisco Ramon. I hope Carlos is enjoying his mini-vacay. Otoh, I really like that Caitlin is included in the West-Allen circle this ep.

I wonder why Nora doesnt call Cait and Cisco Aunt and Uncle. They must be the godparents.

It's okay Ralph. Some leads don't pan out. If Shitloque was an actual detective he'd know that.

But I love that the heroes of Central City can walk around in public and interact freely. Oliver's team would need to break in and scare the bejesus out of some poor unsuspecting sod.

NORA IS A DISASTER LESBIAN CONFIRMED. Or probably a disaster bi like her Dad. I AM LOVIN' THIS.

THAT MOMENT WHEN THE PENNY DROPS FOR BARRY THAT HIS DAUGHTER IS A GAY LMAOOO

Fuck I love that Iris never even blinked when Nora said Spencer was cute. She probably sussed it way before. I love you Momma West-Allen.

Oh no oh no I was right. Iris pulled a Joe West. Goddamn it. I mean I get why, I get how traumatized and scared she must have been but IRIS NO YOU DON'T LIE TO YOUR CHILDREN TO PROTECT THEM. Remember how you felt when your Dad did that to you?

I am legit heartbroken, you guys. I really wanted to be wrong. I blame Joe West's goddamn patriarchal shitty parenting for perpetuating this cycle of lies.

I swear to God if this show tries to justify lying and manipulating your kid again I'm going to give up on it. It's triggering as all fuck (I still havent recovered from S1 and 2) and I need Iris to be held accountable when she fucks up, not let her turn into another Fefe who can do no wrong.

Jesus Christ Iris, trying to force a conversation with Nora by invading her privacy and ignoring her need for space is not okay. BOUNDARIES, girl.

Oh okay but she's holding herself accountable thank fuck. I mean, Barry's right she can't be blamed for what she might do in the future but IT'S STILL WRONG.

I was actually shaking. Friendly reminder that survivors of parental abuse and manipulation are also watching this show, some of us with CPTSD.

"What if my Dad did something like that to you"?? Er. Iris? Remember when he lied to you for twenty years about your mother being dead and you didn't talk to him for six months?

Oh here we go. You've stood there like a gormless beanpole for three episodes without so much as trying to intervene Barry and this is how you choose to comfort your wife. Not "yes, it's a bad thing and we can't know what led you to the choices future you made but in the here and now you know not to. We can learn from the future and make different choices, Iris."

PUNCH HIM IN THE THROAT, CAITLIN.

...I just meant for frightening Caitlin, but he actually wants to be punched?

Ooooh that was satisfying! Pretty sure her form was all wrong but can't argue with the results.

I love how fucking competent Iris is??? She knows how to use the entire STAR Labs tech arsenal. Although that Vibe device kinda defeats the whole purpose of breechers. It's like if they had a device lying around that could give just anyone super speed.

Not sure how Spencer thinks XS can kill Flash. One's a n00b and the other is veteran.

Wait, Baby Flash can do what now?

I don't like that they had to dumb Barry down so much to give Iris a chance to shine. A couple can both be competent at the same time! It's called being a power couple! Not one-half Idiot Ball couple!

So her phone got powers? Huh??

Ah yes. Dark Matter. More multi-purpose than Quantum.

Okay cool Ralph is getting his due. "Less right" LOL

"That puts meta-human powers in the hands of anyone" kinda like having a Breeching device, no?

We have meta-humans, meta-phones, meta-daggers (a tech dagger??) HOLY SHIT WHAT IF THE DARK MATTER HIT A HOME DEPOT?? How many people now have meta-vacuum cleaners? Meta-dishwashers?? Meta-can openers??

Oh God. No. Not this.

No. You do not lie and manipulate your kids to protect them. You do not do that. Love is no justification.

Don't Barry don't. Stop stop.

I can't watch this. FUCK YOU.

FOR GOD'S SAKE SHE'S CRYING AND SHAKING YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO COMFORT HER AND MAKE HER FEEL SAFE NOT STAND ON YOUR PILE OF BULLSHIT WITHOUT GIVING A FLYING FUCK.

No, cry all you want. I have no sympathy for either one of you callous asshats. You fucking destroyed that girl. Fuck Joe West for having raised you to think this way.

Yeah no Joe West is not who you want to go to in these matters, Nora.

I don't even care about Cicada anymore.

I should have known this show would never get any less gross.

Look, I was fully prepared to be sympathetic to Iris, traumatized, alone and single mother to a meta-child in a dangerous world to have made some bad decisions. And I do empathize. But I wasn't prepared for present-day Barry and Iris to justify and rationalize that shit. I thought they were going to say "That was a bad thing your Mom did. I'm sure she thought she was protecting you but she may have lost sight of how much it hurts to have your choices taken away from you. But I'm not that woman, Nora. I know I could never bear to see you hurting like this. I can still make better choices. Please give me a chance?"

Not "No I am your Mom and everything I do is right and good because I love you, I'm sorry if you feel hurt about it but them's the facts."

They did this when Barry and Joe lied to Iris all through S1, when Joe lied to Iris about her mother. This show is still all about apologia for lying and manipulation because LOVE AND GOOD INTENTIONS AND TO PROTECT YOU BY DISRESPECTING THE FUCK OUT OF YOU AND TAKING AWAY YOUR AGENCY.

Parental love is not a justification. Most abuse takes place at the hands of parents who really believe they're doing it for their children's protection. Please never say "your parents have every right to hurt you to protect you because they love you". Do you even care at all.

I'm not okay. Gonna take a break from fandom for a while. Can't deal with people taking Iris's side to protect their Westallen feels. Fuck both of them.

I'm posting this but please don't engage me to argue about it. Massively triggered.

[wretchedangelswriting-blog]

Eowells x reader - Just this once, I can pretend

Title: Just this once, I can pretend

Author: wretchedangelswriting

Word count: 2 500 + words

Imagine: you are a medic, you studied at the same university as Caitlin and after school your ways parted for a while. After few years of succesful work as a surgeon in one of the top hospitals in Canada, Caitlin asked you to join the STAR labs team (few months after the explosion of the partical accelerator) to examine Barry Allen, who has been in coma eversince he got struck by lighting during the explosion. He woke up shortly after you became an employee of STAR labs and began your own researches. You really get along with doctor Wells, however as professional surgeon, you figured he was pretending to be paralysed within the first few weeks of work. You never found the courage to bring it up or to ask why, but life (or a man in a yellow suit, whatever), brings you the perfect oppoturnity to do so.

***

It was scary, but not as scary as it was supposed to be.

Here is the thing, you were not stupid. You were not stupid and your clear judgement was not clouded with feelings nor trust towards him. Plus you a had major in medicine.

That’s why, when you looked at the strange, handsome man, peacefuly sitting in his wheelchair, you knew, he had no reason to be sitting in there at all.

You knew he was a fraud, a liar and it didn’t take a genius to figure that out.

What made it complicated was the fact that you fitted into the team Flash more then you have ever fitted anywhere. For the first time in your life, you felt welcomed, needed, you felt like you belonged into STAR labs.

And he was the one who made you feel like that the most.

Sure, you got along with everyone perfectly. You knew Caitlin back from your school days, you enjoyed being geeky and nerdy with Cisco, because you two just happened to watch the same TV shows and with Barry you sometimes felt like you found a soulmate when you were speaking to him. Even the West family welcomed you with open arms when they learned both of your parents were gone and that you didn’t have any siblings.

But nothing made you feel better when he offered you a glass of ice cold whiskey, sat down with you in his lab and talked to you about anything you would bring up. He seemed interested in everything you had to say, from your science to your past across about favorite leisure time activities.

You spoke and he listened and after a few evenings spent like that he started speaking about himself as well. What fascinated him, which books he liked to read, how he got the idea of even building the partical accelerator.

He was supportive, kind, briliant and he made you feel like he would do anything for you. He was perfect.

Too perfect, that it maybe was enough to bluff the whole team Flash, but you knew better. But you kept your mouth shut, because it was too soon to make any assumptions and you were willing to share your concerns with others when you actually had some proof.

I wonder which doctor was dumb enough to actually put him into that wheelchair. You wondered on your way home from one of those sessions.

***

When the man in the yellow suit made his first appearance it confused you but you also breathed out a sigh of relief, because it meant that your assumptions about Wells, or Harrison (how he offered you to call him), were wrong. That still did not explain, why you saw him walking into his lab once (but you said nothing, you wanted to figure this one out for yourself).

You were down there, helping Cisco and Harrison to build the trap, but for some reason, Harrison tried his best to keep you out of that work. It almost made you doubt whether he actually wanted the trap to work. Maybe you were just paranoid at this point, but everything just made little too much sence to ignore it.

„Why isn’t Barry here?“ you asked once you were all sitting in the cortex, waiting for the yellow speedster to get caught on the bait you secured from the Mercury labs.

Wells and Joe looked at each other and then Joe said, „we thought it would be better for him to stay out of this, since it’s really personal for him.“

„Well, I hope you also thought of the fact that Barry is the only person who can do anything if something goes wrong“ you muttered under your breath. „No offence meant towards the CCPD but we all saw what that man can do.“

„No offence taken,“ Joe nodded, „but Cisco and doctor Wells worked hard on that trap.“

„Don’t worry, Y/N,“ Harrison moved closer to you, „we thought of everything,“ he said and gently, non visibly to others, rubbed your hand.

Now, was that a genuine concern or a distraction to stop me saying anything else, huh?

You said nothing but looked deeply into his eyes, sending a message clear to you, and possibly even to him. I know you’re lying, but I trust you with my life.

And then the alarms notified them about the presence of the speedster with red lighting in the building. Your heartbeat jumped up as you observed the screen which projected what was happening only few floors beneath you. It was fast, yellow blur racing towards the tachyon device, getting trapped instantly.

Well, that was easy. Too easy. You couldn’t forgive yourself to be a bit doubtful.

„Let’s see what we caught,“ Harrison said and turned around to make his way out of the cortex to the elevator. He was followed by you, Cisco and Joe along with the CCPD task force.

„I don’t need to mention I would be happier if you stayed up here, safe, with Caitlin, right Y/N?“ he said quietly as you entered the lift.

„The real question is, is anyone ever really safe?“ you turned to face to him and raised an eyebrow. Meaning it quite poetically but also literally, because well, Wells himself was probably not the safest person to be around.

He sighed, „just be careful,“ and he slid his palm over yours again „I don’t want you to get hurt.“

You were glad you stood at the very back of the elevator, so that no one could see him holding your hand and you, against your own damn will, blushing like a teenage girl.

What on Earth was wrong with you.

***

Harrison took the terrible looking beating from so called ‚Reverse Flash‘ pretty okay. He had couple of bruises, scratches and possible concussion but overal he seemed to be alright. Nothing some rest, band-aid and maybe few stitches wouldn’t fix.

„I should have been here,“ Barry said, sitting next to you on a chair, while you were stitching Harrison’s eyebrow.

„I could not agree more,“ you replied dryly.

„Nothing much would be different mister Allen,“ Wells said „Reverse Flash seemed to be so interested in beating me up, he would have done it anyway.“

Barry sighed and dragged his hands across his face. „Don’t worry Barry,“ you patted his shoulder „you’ll get that son of a bitch next time.“ You spoke to Barry but you were looking at Harrison. God knew why you were still so suspicious.

„He took a lot from you Barry, we will start working on increasing your speed tomorrow, that will bring you closer to catching him.“

„Thank you, doctor Wells,“ Barry replied. „You should get some rest now, though.“

„That’s correct, you should probably spend the night under a medical supervision in case you started feeling worse,“ Caitlin walked into the room.

„I was supposed to get drinks with Cisco tonight but I’ll cancel and stay here to keep an eye on you,“ Caitlin turned around to go and tell Cisco, but again, God knew why, you stopped her.

„It’s okay, Caitlin, you and Cisco go, I’ll stay,“

„Are you sure it won’t bother you, Y/N?“ Harrison asked.

„Of course not,“ you smiled at Caitlin „grab Cisco and go, you both need it today.“

„What about you, Y/N?“ Barry asked cautiously.

„Oh, doctor Wells has a delicious whiskey hidden under his desk, I’ll be fine.“

„I need to remind I am really fond of that beverage,“ Harrison smiled.

„What a shame you’re on painkillers,“ you threw a smirk at him.

Caitlin and Barry smiled at you knowingly. „It’s kinda late, I’ll head home with Joe,“ Barry said and gave you a quick hug.

„Goodnight,“ you smiled at him.

Cisco and Caitlin left STAR labs few moments later and you have been left with doctor Wells alone again. Not that you didn’t ask for it before.

„Are feeling okay?“ you asked him as you sat on the side of the hospital bed.

„I am in comfortable bed, in a company of a briliant young lady, I am indeed feeling okay,“ he said and lifted corners of his mouth into a sneaky smile.

„You know how I meant it,“ you said, trying not to look to smitten by his words.

Words.

That man knew how to use these, they were his strongest weapons. What a pity you have been a passionate reader.

„I’ll be fine, Y/N.“ He looked at you with a bit softer expression this time.  He raised his hand a bit, guiding you to move closer to him and hold his hand again. You didn’t say a thing and did as he asked you with a body language. It was the wrong choice, it was bad and it was wicked, but it felt so right. His fingers slowly playing with yours were sending vibrations into your whole body.

You focused your sight on your conjoined hands. „Why was he after you?“ you asked, still not looking at him.

„Quite frankly, I have no idea. Lot of people are lately very enthusiastic about slitting my throat.“

No, no, no. Wrong. Everything about the answer seemed wrong.

„It just seemed a bit off to me, the whole situation,“ you shrugged a bit. He gave you a look which suggested you to continue. „He kills all of the police officers from the CCPD task force, but he lets Eddie and Joe live. He beats you angrily, but in the end he lets you live. If he really wanted to kill you he’d do it in a flash. He said his goals were beyond our understanding but he needs our technology to reach them.“ You spit out all of your frustrating doubts and took a deep breath.

„Basically, everything about today happened how it was probably supposed to happen, but when you think about it, every single detail is just too slightly off.“

You looked him straight in the eyes. For a brief moment it seemed like he was about to say something revealing or breakthrough but in the end, all that you got from him was: „You have a point, Y/N, but we will not learn anything new unless we meet him again.“

You sighed, „that is the truth I did’t want to hear, but it is the one.“ You checked your phone, it was few minutes after midnight.

„It’s late,“ he pointed out.

„Not too late to talk though, if you are not tired, of course.“

He was looking at you like you were a painting. With respect and affection. His fingers were automatically rubbing your palm.

„Nothing would please me more,“ he said at last. You gave him a half-smile, not really feeling cheerful, but also not entirely depressed. It was the same old inner conflict you have been experiencing eversince you confirmed yourself the unpleasant truth about Harrison Wells.

„But first, Y/N, let me hold you, please.“

Well that took you by surprise, your heart skipping a beat, making sure you have not misheard. You lifted your eyes to examine his expression and lords, it was filled with need and aching desire you have been feeling on the inside everytime he touched you.

Again, you should have come up with an excuse and leave off to sleep on the other hospital bed, but naturally, you didn’t. That man could tell you to sit and your body would obey him before your mind could even consider the situation. The only thing that kept your dignity and also your sanity in place, was the fact that he felt the same way about you.

And so you kicked off your shoes and moved closer to him, as he lifted the covers so you could cuddle up to him. You layed your head on his chest and he slid his arm around you, holding you tightly. In a comletely natural manner, you collided fingers of your hand with his and layed them on his stomach.

You should have felt nervous, laying in the arms of liar, but the Universe was not having it and instead of being terrified, you felt content.

„Somehow, me being attatched to a hospital bed, seems convenient,“ he said. You didn’t see his face but you heard a smile in his voice.

„Somehow, Caitlin leaving for drinks with Cisco, seems convenient as well,“ you replied, snuggling a bit closer to him, to which he responed by stroking your back.

„I wonder if they are gossiping us right now.“

„It’s Cisco, of course they are,“ you smiled.

„Yeah.“ Suddenly you felt his lips on the top of your head and hear a loud exhale.

„Y/N, you are one of a kind.“ Your chest felt tight but at the same time you felt like you could fly. You felt tears coming into your eyes but along with them, you were smiling like an idiot. That’s what you called a ‚mixed emotion‘.

„I know,“ you sighed. He chuckled. Perhaps not the answer he was expecting, but it probably didn’t matter.

You couldn’t help it but you found yourself trying to bury yourself deeper into his arms, putting one of your legs across his own.

That’s when it hit you.

This was the time to actually say something.

You immediately felt anxiety in your stomach but before it could stop you from saying anything you took a deep breath and said it.

„Feel free to tangle your legs into mine, I know you can do that.“

He froze, his hand stopped stroking your back, his muscles tensed and his breath got stuck in his throat.

„I am not stupid you know,“ you raised your head to look at him only to see an expression completely unfamiliar to his face, but yet, the one that fitted him the best. Suddenly he didn’t look like the good old doctor Wells. He looked like someone much more capable and cunning.

„I know you are not stupid,“ he said, „so there is no point in denying it.“

You shook your head, „no, there isn’t.“

„Y/N, I-,“

„Shut it,“ you stopped him before he could start feeding you some more lies. „I don’t want it from you, I have already figured this on my own I will figure out the rest as well. That’s the only way of learning the full truth with you.“

Quitely, intensly, with his jaw tightened, he stared at your face. You were proud of yourself for not breaking the eye contact.

„What do you want me to do, Y/N?“ he asked.

„Haven’t you heard what I said the first time?“ you replied.

He looked a bit confused for a moment, before relaxing and moving your legs closer towards you, tangling them with yours. Once again, he tightened his grip on you and pulled you closer to him then ever before.

„I know you don’t want to hear this, but I am sorry it has to be like this, Y/N,“ he whispered into your hair.

„Me too.“

„I want to tell you everything, Y/N, even though you might not like it, but it will bet he truth.“ His hand began to stroke your back again.

You nodded. „I’ll have a lot of questions, but not now.“

„Okay, as you wish.“

It went… a lot smoother then you anticipated. You wondered whether he was actually willing to share all of his secrets with you but you strongly doubted it.

For a minute, you wanted to pretend this actually was the kind and honest doctor Wells you have been working with for the past year. And that minute was granted to you. What minute, a whole night.

You were confused, baffled and really desperate for some explanations but you were sure of one thing; that for one night, just this one night, he wanted to pretend too.

-the end?-

I hope that you liked this! Requests are open so if you have some wishes for fanfiction, I am here to fulfill them!

Any kind of response is always highly appreciated.

[officialtitties]

flashvibe/barriscowest one shot; ‘adjusting’

author:  @officialtitties​ aka @lysswrites​ // (allie)

beta’d: first like 2 thirds were beta’d by @spidergweb​ (kait). she is so amazing!! thank you so much buddy!! you have been an immense help

summary: Cisco starts noticing some things that are off about Barry. AKA A season 3 AU, in which, barriscowest was canon in the original timeline, and Dante died in both timelines.

notes: the first in a series of connected barriscowest one shots. !! will post on ao3 when it’s been Refined more lmao (i.e edited not at 4am)

tags & triggers: implied self harm (so subtle you might miss it), angst, polyamory, flashvibe, barriscowest

wordcount: 2037

Things seem normal to begin with (Or, at least... as normal as they can be given Dante’s death)  but the more Cisco interacts with Barry, the more consciously he begins to notice something is off.

It’s little things, mostly.

Like the first day Barry doesn’t have to go to work since moving in.

He makes his usual ‘guilt breakfast’ (as Cisco has to come to think of it). He attempts some clearly too-cheerful conversation. And, when the part comes that he’d usually zip off to work he turns.... speechless.

Barry’s mouth opens. Then shuts. Clearly lost for words, he compensates with a forced smile, stammering out some long-winded story about charging his phone, and flashes into his room.

Cisco’d have chalked it up to Barry being Barry if it wasn’t for the fact that he could see his charger on the kitchen bench from where he was sitting.

**

He considers that something is wrong again about two weeks later. Barry has just made a confession to the entirety of Team Flash: he created an alternate timeline. He went decades back in time and fucked up their world, but not for him. Not for him even though he begged and cried, and has been grieving inconsolably for almost a year. He is beside himself with hurt and confusion.

Cisco is pretty confident in expecting to get home to Barry holed up in his room, not anywhere that Cisco has to deal with him. However, he opens the door to a gush of wind so strong, the flowers by the door wilt at its mercy.

There are a pair of scissors cluttering in the sink, and fresh finger-prints on the stainless steel.

All too conveniently, Barry is nowhere in sight.

Cisco’s knuckles curl white, and his tense frame all-but-marches over to the door of Barry’s room. However, before Cisco can even contemplate which of Barry’s possessions would make the most lasting bruise if thrown angrily in his general direction, he realises Barry has left the apartment completely.

Barry’s eager avoidance is practically expected in the face of him telling Cisco about flashpoint.

But in all honesty, even if there was something a little un-barry-like about the rushed exit. Cisco’s too angry to care.

**

Their apartment feels empty.

Even emptier than it already felt when Cisco didn’t know why Barry was avoiding him.

It seems that whenever Cisco’s there, Barry’s not.

And though it is with out a doubt what Cisco asked for ("Barry I just need you to give me space, okay? A lot of it. Like a ‘take-notes-from-the-lightyears-of-space-stars-give-each-other’ amount of space.”), there’s a part of him that’s just tired with being angry.

So when Cisco takes a step at reconciliation, bringing up one of their in-jokes about cell-structure as he chews avidly on a gummy worm, and is met with a scrunched brow...

Well, he’s disappointed to say the least.

What should have been a huge victory for them only reminds Cisco of every reason he is mad at Barry in the first place.

An awkwardness lingers tangibly between them, as Barry realises what’s just happened. Before he can correct himself, however, Cisco up and leaves with a dismissive shake of his head.

**

They don’t talk for a while after that.

At least, not in a way that inspires any sort of insight into Barry’s side of things. Cisco thinks he’s done a good job at making how he feels about hearing it pretty damn clear.

But, they do see each other.

With their line of work, not to mention their living situation, it’s sort of unavoidable.

Barry hovers around him like he’s walking on egg shells. Constantly looking over to him, trying to gauge his reaction. He’s always looking to test the waters: trying to toe the line between not breaking boundaries, and not unnecessarily distancing himself from Cisco.

And despite the big part of Cisco that just wants to push Barry away, there’s a bigger part that wears down, feels like its breaking every time he does.

Even before they go out into the field, and Vibe only arrives in time to see Flash get two major organs kebabed, Cisco knew that the time for holding grudges was long past.

**

It takes half a second to portal them back to Star Labs.

But Barry’s already so pale, and losing a lot of blood very quickly.

He watches as Iris holds Barry’s hand, and Caitlin pulls a rusty steel bar out from his stomach.

Cisco’s chest is tight, like he can’t breathe.

He’s only just decided he’s ready to forgive Barry, and now what? He might not ever get to? In what universe is that fair?

He watches Barry writhe and sweat, eventually blacking out from the pain.

**

When he wakes up, Cisco is sitting by his bedside, chewing gum.

Barry shifts up, already offering a tired apology, but Cisco simply shakes his head, reaching for his hand.

The acceptance goes unspoken.

There’s a croak in Barry’s voice as he breaks the tension, his lips lifting in a nervous smile “So uh- cell structure...”

Cisco’s smile copies Barry’s, reaching his eyes in a way Barry hasn’t seen since he got back.

**

They get a long better after that: watching movies when they should be doing work, throwing popcorn into each others’ mouths, playing Mario Kart with Iris on weekends.

Sometimes Barry will smile so wide at him, he feels his whole chest light up at the very sight.

Cisco can’t help but wonder, though, with the way Barry acts sometimes: the longing looks, the too long touches, the nightmares.

In fact, pretty much whenever Cisco's not tossing and turning himself, he can hear Barry doing the same.

***

Things come to a head one night when Cisco wakes up from a dream. It’s one of the recurring ones he’s been having lately, about a life so close to his own he knows that it probably was.

This particular one had involved Barry and Iris holding him after Dante’s funeral. They were in an unfamiliar, but oddly homey living room.

He’d been crying into Barry’s shoulder, feeling like he could barely breathe, when Iris started running her fingers through his hair, rubbing slow, comforting circles into his arm. They were only just getting him to calm down when, very jarringly, he is woken up.

Still disorientated from the dream, Cisco doesn't quite process the loud crash, and the defeated whisper of “Fuck” that follows it. Instead, he stumbles into the living room, confused. He pulls the parts of his hair that have fallen in the front of his face behind his ear, and squints his eyes a little in order to see properly.

“Barry?” He whispers.

“Shit, I’m sorry. I’m cleaning it up, you can go back to sleep.”

It’s dark, but he can hear the shakiness in Barry’s voice, and make out the large gash on the palm of his hand.

He sighs deeply, because it’s clear something is wrong. Something bigger than a once-off, middle-of-the-night freak-out.

He grabs a paper towel from their kitchenette, twirling the paper around his hand and ripping it from the roll. Then, gestures for Barry to stand up, and move away from the broken glass:

Barry closes the few steps between them, cradling his injured hand to keep from bleeding on their tile.

He can’t seem to make eye contact, but he winces slightly as Cisco presses the towel to the cut.

“What’s wrong?”

“What? Nothing. It stung a little”

“Barry. You’re crying,”

Barry shrugs dismissively at that, wincing again as his movement chafes the cut, “Okay. It stung a lot,”

Cisco raises a disbelieving brow, which Barry can’t help but smile at when he glances up.  “It’s fine, it’s just... I’ve been having trouble sleeping. Since I came back.”

“Came back?”

“From flashpoint.”

Cisco can’t seem to meet his eyes at that, he just nods at the ground, “Oh”

Barry swallows, pursing his lips to stop from crying as he looks anywhere else other than in Cisco’s direction.

“Barry,”

Barry begins hurriedly wiping at his face with his good hand, rushing to correct himself. “No, I know. I know, I’m sorry.”

There’s a beat of silence, and Cisco wants to say something to make it better but there’s nothing: he’s grabbing at straws.

“C’mere,” Cisco pulls Barry against his chest, holding him tight with one arm, as his other keeps grip on his injured hand.

Barry tightens up under the close contact before falling into it.

They stay pressed together, until Barry takes a short stuttering breath and pulls away.

“You’ve vibed it, right?”

“Huh?”

“The other timeline... the original one?” Barry looks almost guilty asking.

Cisco bites his lip, “Oh... yeah. I wasn’t gonna say anything,”

“How can you look at me?”

The hint of desperation in Barry’s voice pulls Cisco’s insides into knots. His mouth forms around words, but a silence lingers just a little too long for it to be comfortable.

There’s no denying it, the innate wrongness of everything, how Cisco had wished Barry dead more than once in the heat of initially finding out what he’d done.

“I ruined everything-” Barry continues, “even if you don’t wanna be with me. You and Iris, you were so happy. And now it’s like you were never even-”

Barry cuts himself off just before his voice breaks, pressing his lips together and looking away.

“Barr, look at me”

Barry does. A little quicker than is strictly human. His eyes are heavy with something indescribable. It makes Cisco's chest ache.

Cisco presses the paper towel a little more firmly into Barry’s hand, where the cut on his palm is healing. Then, wraps his fingers around it to keep it from trembling, never breaking eye contact.

“I’m mad at you.” He deadpans, suddenly feeling like he's let go of a tonne of bricks he's been carrying around with him for months. “I’m so fucking mad at you I can hardly stand it. You made a mistake of epic proportions, and the fact that you made that mistake for you when you couldn’t make it for me... it hurts. A lot.”

Barry seems to shrink at the words, but he doesn't look away. “But... what’s done is done. You can’t keep trying to fix it, force it back how it was. And you can’t keep beating yourself up over failing at this impossible task you’ve set for yourself... You can't keep trying to restore a reality that doesn't exist anymore.”

Barry looks down again at that, ashamed.

“It’s not gonna be like it was for you,” Cisco says, because it has to be said, but with the way Barry's trying to hide how much it hurts to hear, it feels like pushing glass up his throat, “And you’re just gonna have to live with that.”

Barry nods, still not meeting Cisco's eyes. His face is wet with silent tears, and his lips are tilted upward in a forced smile.

Cisco lets up the pressure on Barry's hand, removing the napkin to see the cut is scarring.

There’s a moment of stillness between them before Cisco walks the bloody paper-towel to the bin, and Barry goes to pick up the rest of the broken glass.

Just as the conversation seems to be over, Cisco standing with his back to the kitchen in the arch of his bedroom door, and Barry quietly cleaning the rest of the broken glass shards, Cisco speaks: “It’s... different. But, that doesn’t mean I don’t still love you, Barr. You’re my best friend." Barry tenses at the last words, but manages to school his expression enough that Cisco doesn't feel like he's said something wrong.  “I love you... Even when-" He cuts himself off. Then, as if reaffirming the thought, he continues, "I love you. And...”

Cisco exhales deeply, with his entire body, as if letting go of the weight of the world.  “I wanna forgive you.” He says, his hand spread gently over the doorframe, “But, if we're ever gonna move past this, you’re gonna need to figure out how to forgive yourself.”

[starlabsforever-blog]

The Sound of Silence

This is a sequel to a little ficlet I wrote several weeks ago, a prompt fill for “You could have been hurt”. Several anons requested it, and I wasn’t sure what more I could say, but then this happened.

Cw for some discussion of suicidal ideation- nothing major, but it’s there, a little.

Caitlin woke up before she opened her eyes.

“Caitlin,” someone said beside her, and she felt a warm hand on her arm.

She groaned softly and opened her eyes, blinking away the cloudy sheen of unconsciousness. “Cisco?” she murmured, even though the voice and the hand didn’t feel quite like him.

“He’s in the hallway, love,” the voice said, and the clouds in her vision parted so that she could see Julian leaning over her. She was in the med bay, laying in her own sterile medical cot. “I was starting to think you wouldn’t wake up.”

His eyes were big and blue and sad, but she was too tired to find the empathy for him that she should have. She sat up and her head throbbed.

Julian grabbed her shoulder. “You shouldn’t get up.”

She twisted away impatiently. “I want to see Cisco.”

She wasn’t sure why she wanted him. Maybe because everything hurt and she couldn’t remember anything that had happened, and he was warmth and comfort.

Julian should’ve served the same purpose, but he didn’t, not to her.

Julian blinked, looking stung. She thought he might argue with her, but instead he turned away. “I’ll get him.” His voice sounded strangled, but she couldn’t find it in her to care. “Just- stay in bed, alright? You had a close call there.”

She watched Julian’s hastily retreating back and reached up to rub her aching temples. She felt a tug at her wrist and glanced down to see an IV line. Her fingers hit the rough, grainy texture of a bandage, and around it she felt stiff, sticky clumps in her hair. Probably blood.

She had a vague idea of what had happened, but it wasn’t all there, and it was smeared and blurry around the edges, like the water damaged page of a book. She knew it couldn’t be good, because she was here, and that meant she’d been seriously hurt beyond the capabilities of her hyper-metabolism.

“Well?”

She blinked rapidly and turned to where Cisco was leaning one arm against the doorway. His eyes were deeply shadowed and his hair was pulled back into a frizzy ponytail at the base of his neck. His shirt was wrinkled, as if it he’d slept in it.

Caitlin tilted her chin to meet his eyes. “Well, what?” He stared back. “What do you have to say for yourself?”

The blurry events in her mind were slowly coming back, like the faint picture developing on a film reel, but she couldn’t quite reach it. Even so, she was beginning to realize that it wasn’t good. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Cisco’s cool, defiant expression didn’t change, but his brow did crinkle a little. “Can’t you remember?”

“Pretend I don’t.”

He let out a long sigh, bracing himself against the doorframe. “You decided to go out and play vigilante again. Real nasty bunch, metas I ‘ve never seen before. I woke up to this vibe of you and I came to get you and-” He broke off and glanced at the ground. “Julian came to patch you up. Saved your life. You should buy him a gift basket or something.”

She waited for him to say something, but he didn’t. “That can’t possibly be all.”

His arm holding onto the frame dropped to his side. “Sorry if I don’t feel like rehashing the whole thing. I just finished living through it, and I’m spent.”

Caitlin felt frustration bubbling in her chest. “I remember some of it, but not all.” She sat up straighter and she could feel him watching. “Those weren’t just metas, they’re criminals. They sell vertigo to innocent kids.” His face twitched, his eyes deep and expressive. “I’ve been tracking them for weeks, and I managed to shut down a few of their operations. If I hadn’t done that, they would have ruined a lot more lives by now.”

“Hm.” Cisco crossed his arms over his chest and didn’t move, seemingly rooted in the doorway. “Right. That’s what you’ve been doing for weeks, right? Every time you’ve shown up here with some new injury and I have to patch you up.” She nodded. “See, here’s the funny thing, though. They weren’t doing anything this time. They didn’t have drugs, they weren’t selling anything, they were just minding their own business.”

She blinked at him. “What are you saying, that I should leave them alone when they’re not hurting anyone? They’re criminals, Cisco, they could-”

“That’s not what I meant and you know it,” he interrupted. His voice was hard and heavy and it stung. “It seemed to me like you picked the fight.”

More details were slowly trickling back in, but she held her ground. “What does that matter?”

“You tell me. You went after those guys by yourself, without backup, to pick a fight you knew you’d lose.” He laughed sharply, mirthlessly. “Doesn’t matter, right?”

Caitlin crossed her arms over her chest. “Why are you so angry?”

His eyes widened incredulously. “Gee, I dunno, maybe because my best friend is an idiot who keeps trying to kill herself!”

His eyes were alight, angrier than she’d ever seen before, and they looked like a stranger’s eyes. Then they dimmed, and he let out a long breath.

“You died,” he said in a low voice. He looked like the wind had been knocked out of his sails. “You flatlined.” Her heart skipped and ached belatedly, as if reminding her that it had endured one too many restarts and that she was on borrowed time. “Julian was a wreck, his hands were shaking all over the place, and he wanted to take you to the hospital. So did I, but we couldn’t.” He lowered his head, shoulders hunched. “I thought I was going to lose you again. There was blood everywhere and we had the defibrillator out and-” He gave an audible shudder and looked up at her. His eyes were wet. “It was last time all over again, except this time you did it to yourself.”

His words struck some weak, vulnerable spot beneath her ribcage and it hurt. “Why do you care?” she blurted.

He looked like she’d kicked him in the stomach. “Why would you say that?”

“I’m not your best friend,” she spat, and he ducked his head. “Not anymore. I’ve hurt and killed and caused pain. Why should you care if I live or die?” She breathed heavily. Every breath hurt. “Why should anyone?”

Cisco’s face had gone curiously still, as if someone pressed his pause button. She slowly laid back down against the pillow, curling herself into the edge of the cot. That had taken more energy than she had, and now her head ached and her chest ached.

She heard the soft patter of his Converse against the tile floor. She felt the mattress depress beside her from his weight.

“Cait,” he said huskily. “Caitlin, come on. You can’t just say something like that and then shut up.” She closed her eyes and pressed her head into the mattress. Everything hurt so deeply that she didn’t know where it was coming from.

“Please talk to me,” he murmured.

Caitlin turned her head so that she could see him. He was so close and she wanted so badly to reach out and fling herself into his arms, but the two feet between them felt like a canyon. “I’m really tired,” she whispered.

“Don’t do this,” he begged. “Don’t shut down, not now. Tell me what’s wrong. I’m sorry I’ve been an asshole, okay? I can see you hurting but I don’t know how to help you and I hate myself for it.”

She tried to focus on breathing normally, but every bone hurt. “I don’t know how to be anymore,” she admitted. He turned to look at her, his eyes locked with hers. “I don’t know how to live with myself after what I’ve done.”

“That wasn’t you.”

“Yes, it was,” she shot back, and tears pricked her eyes involuntarily. “I did horrible things, Cisco, worse than the people that I’ve been fighting. And I’m starting to think the rest of you would have been better off if Julian had left my necklace on that night.”

He recoiled. “No. No way. Don’t even say that.”

“Because you know it’s true,” she half-shouted. Her throat felt raw and hoarse.

Cisco shot to his feet and stepped away from the bed. His back was trembling. When he turned back around, he was clasping his hands together tightly.

“It’s not true,” he said. “That will never, ever be true. It doesn’t matter where you think you are in this whole good-evil dichotomy, okay? You deserve to live, god, Caitlin. Nothing you could do would change that.”

Caitlin swallowed and pressed her head into the pillow, just tired. Tired of this conversation, tired of feeling.

He knelt next to the bed, right by her head, his face inches away from hers. “I get it. I know how you feel. I’m tired too. I don’t always want to be here.” His face crumpled a little. “You know that.”

That hurt another part of her, buried so deep under the newest layers of trauma that she’d almost forgotten. The Gorilla City cell, a tearful conversation that devolved into a shouting match, and Cisco at his very lowest, cried out and husked out and desiccated.

Cisco recognized the defeat in her silence and breathed out quietly. She felt his breath on her nose. His breath was thick and warm, like he was sick. He was staring at her hand, like he wanted to reach out and touch her, but he didn’t.

There was so much distance between them these days.

“Come on,” he said. “Talk to me. Please talk to me.”  

She stared at him and he stared back. The silence between them was deafening.

Finally, she said, in a very small voice, “I’m tired. I need to sleep.”

He stared at her and blinked rapidly. “Okay.” He stood up, slowly, like it was an effort. “You rest up, alright? I’ll be here when you wake up.”

She shook her head. “You don’t have to. Julian’s here. Go home.”

“That would be unconscionable after what you just told me.”

“Cisco.” She pushed herself up with one arm. “I don’t want to die.”

Cisco pursed his lips, like he wanted to debate that. “Good. Because I don’t know if I could force myself to pick up and go on if it ever came to that.”

He reached out to touch her hand, and then halted himself in midair. He swallowed hard and headed for the door.

She watched his back, and wanted so badly to call his name, for him to come and sit on the bed and hug her and hold her and tell her everything would be alright.

But that was a lie. She knew that now.

Cisco had paused in the doorway, watching her with careful intensity. “I can stay if you want me to.”

Oh, that was all she wanted, and all she had to do was tell him.

But their world had changed. Things had always been changing, but now it was beyond the point of recognition. They couldn’t fix everything with a hug and a heart-to-heart.

She didn’t know how to fix herself. She didn’t know if she could.

He was waiting for an answer. “Cait?” he asked softly.

She rolled onto her side so that she couldn’t see his face. “I just need to sleep.”

The silence roared to a crescendo.

“Okay,” he said. “I’ll be in the cortex. Shout if you need me.”

I do need you, she thought, but she couldn’t bring herself to say the words out loud.

[cisco-fics-4-all]

Believer

So I’ve had this request since well before Season 3 ended, but I felt it was a good fit for expressing some post S3 feels, so here we go! A request for: “Could I request an angsty/fluffy piece where Cisco and Reader get into a heated argument but then reader starts crying and Cisco immediately feels like shit and just holds her and snuggles her?“ I was a little heavy handed on the angst, and not so much on the fluff...oops? Enjoy!

(^ gif made by me, from this video)

p { margin-bottom: 0.1in; line-height: 120%; }

“Ow!” You cried out, flinching away from Julian, as the former field medic did his best to bandage your wounds.

“My apologies Y/N,” Julian replied with a frown, “but it might help, if you stopped fidgeting so much, and let me get this business over with?”

You frowned guiltily. “Sorry,” you apologized softly, “I just...I was hoping to get out of here before Cisco came back, y’know?”

Julian nodded, though the look on his face told you he disapproved. “Y/N, you’re going to have to face him eventually,” he reminded you, resuming his task of wrapping a bandage around your arm, “he is, after all, your superior technically speaking, Barry left him in charge when he...well when he left.”

“That he did Julian,” you agreed quietly, gritting your teeth against the memory of that night, and the pain it had brought with it.

Iris had been nearly inconsolable for a week, living in their shared apartment on her own hadn’t much helped her either. Cisco, bless his heart, had taken to leading the team like a nervous substitute teacher, unsure of himself in almost every decision but determined to man his post no matter what. Cynthia helped him, or at least tried to, but being an outsider herself in a way, she kept her guidance of Cisco to a minimum, not wanting to begin her new life on a new earth being seen as a puppetmaster to a man she reluctantly, but deeply cared for. Joe and Harry adapted to this new chain of command quite well considering, being the two most senior members of the team in regards to age, they became rather like the resident dads of Star Labs. They had their hands full with five children between them, but they performed as all father’s do, stoic and fiercely protective under pressure, happy to console, or in Harry’s case, gruffly affirm a difficult decision when such reassurance was needed.

Wally’s replacing of Barry as Central City’s Flash proceeded without much notice of the general public, there were one or two stories in the papers, asking where the savior in red had gone, but the questions were soon forgotten, and it seemed almost as though Wally had always been the only flash there was. He still called himself Kid Flash in private though, he still put his suit on a different mannequin, leaving Barry’s red one in the prominent place within the cortex, like some silent memorial that nobody spoke of, but looked to in times of difficulty.

You were probably the only one who still spoke of Barry as though he were still with the Team, refusing to shunt his existence to that of a mere memory. Everyone said they would find a way to bring him back, they were working on finding a way every day they said, searching and scanning and planning with every spare moment they had...and yet they treated him as though he were dead. You supposed that him being trapped in the speedforce as he was, it was easier that way, starting with low expectations after so much heaping disappointment, meant that proceeding with seemingly no progress didn’t sting quite so bad. But Barry was alive, and you would respect his sacrifice by remembering that fact, and behaving accordingly.

That was what had gotten you injured. Working with Tracy’s abandoned and re-configured speed bazooka, you had miscalculated a few things, leading to a rather spectacular explosion that thankfully hadn’t hurt anything but your pride, your arm, and your desk. Julian had found you rummaging in the med lab for bandages, and now here you sat, perched on the edge of a gurney while the medic worked to patch you up, ears trained towards the hall for the sound of the angry footfalls you knew would be coming eventually.

“There we are,” Julian finally declared, pressing lightly on a strip of gauze tape he applied to seal your bandaging, “you should be alright in a week or so, try not to get that wet though, and if you do, change the bandage or it will-”

“Thank you, Julian!” You called, ignoring the rest of his words in favor of making a run for it, hoping that if you scurried back to the workshop fast enough, you could fix your miscalculations before Cisco found out. But Cisco practically lived in that workshop, so it was really no surprise at all that you found him standing over the charred remains of your desk, waiting for you to return.

“Was is a burn or a gash?” he asked without turning around, his foot nudging a blackened piece of desk debris on the floor.

You glanced down at your arm, the bandage stark white against your skin, the pain underneath it down to a dull burning sensation. “Both,” you replied hesitantly, “but it’s alright now, Julian patched me up, see.” You brandished your arm towards his still turned back, nerves churning slowly in your stomach in the suspense, wondering if you would see anger, or disappointment in his eyes when he finally turned to face you.

“Both,” he repeated with a nod, tucking some hair away from his face, “well then I suppose it’s a good thing that it was only your arm, and not your chest, or stomach, or head,” he turned then, facing you with not anger, not disappointment, but oddly enough, sadness. “You really should be more careful Y/N,” he went on, approaching you slowly as he spoke, “I know that you wanted to keep this little project secret from me, but I’m sure Harry would have helped you, at the very least he’d have gone over your calculations for you,” he stopped just in front of you, reaching out a hand to inspect your arm.

You stared at him, watching the furrow of his brow as he examined your bandage, watching the way his eyes flickered from the bandage to the trails of soot across your clothes, the way his jaw clenched slightly before he met your gaze. This was not like him, this was too reserved, too closed off, this was...this was how Harry dealt with things. “I’m fine Cisco,” you assured him plainly, “Julian patched me up, and I know what I did wrong, I don’t need help to fix it,” you gently pulled your arm back from his grasp, “and it wasn’t a secret project, I was doing it out in the open, in our shared workshop, how is that supposed to be secr-”

“Y/N,” he cut you off, his jaw clenching a little more while his eyes hardened as he looked at you, “working on it in the open doesn’t mean it wasn’t a secret,” he turned to his own desk, lifting his tablet from its surface to show you what it displayed. “Tracy’s plans for the bazooka were locked in a folder on my private computer here, the readouts from the night we faced Savitar were too, and so were the plans that I drew up after getting back from Savitar’s lair where I reconfigured it into a skeleton key,” he scrolled through the folder that had contained the information he spoke of, each file you had systematically hacked and copied to your own personal device so as to keep your work secret. “I know you hacked my computer, and I know you’ve been trying to cannibalize the reconfigured bazooka into something that can get Barry back, so if you could please not lie to me, I would really appreciate it,” he set his tablet down again, the hard look in his eyes becoming anger.

You swallowed thickly, caught in your lie with no way out. It wasn’t that you didn’t want him to know what you were doing, or perhaps it was just that, you didn’t want him to know that you had taken to starting your own reconnaissance efforts because you believed his work was coming too slowly. You didn’t want him to see your lack of faith in his ability to bring Barry back because Cisco was your friend, and with everything else weighing so heavily on his shoulders, you didn’t want him to see this as just one more thing he was doing wrong.

“Is it pointless to apologize?” you asked quietly, looking down at your feet for a moment, “would you believe me if I said I’m sorry?”

Cisco scoffed, turning from you once again. “That depends Y/N, what are you sorry for?” he asked, “are you sorry for keeping this secret from me, are you sorry for hacking my computer, or are you sorry for telling me without words that you think I’m not working hard enough, because all three of those things were pretty low of you, but I suspect you’re only sorry about one of them.”

“Cisco, I-” you began, but he wouldn’t let you finish.

“I’m trying Y/N!” he finally burst out, “I know I’m not everyone’s first choice to lead, hell I’m not even my own first choice to lead, but I am doing the best I can, and it sucks!” he kicked the chunk of desk he’d nudged earlier, sending it smacking against a wall across the room. “Wally is running around out there with no backup, Cyndi is here trying her best to settle into this life that I’ve dragged her into, Iris is waiting with bated breath for any update on bringing Barry back, Harry and Joe keep on keeping on because it’s all they can do besides stepping in and taking this authority that’s been thrust upon me, Julian is tip-toeing around me, trying not to bring up Caitlin, and all of that, every last god awful detail of this mess that I’ve inherited, is just perfectly punctuated by the fact that you decided to work on your own to bring Barry back, because I’m not working fast enough!” Here was the anger you’d anticipated, the frustration, the break...but somehow you found, that you were the one in tears.

Cisco didn’t deserve any of this. Cisco didn’t deserve to be under so much pressure alone, without Barry, without Caitlin, and by your own stupid doing, without you. You had been avoiding the truth for a month now, telling yourself that this was helping him, your secrets were only secret because you didn’t want to burden Cisco with your plans, you wanted to take this thing off of his shoulders, and give it back to him light as a feather. But that wasn’t true, Cisco was right, you had lost faith in him somewhere along the way, and here you were with an injured arm, a charred up desk, no closer to bringing Barry back than Cisco was. “Cisco, I’m sorry,” you choked out, your face burning with tears now, “I know you’re trying, I know you’re overwhelmed, and overworked, and I know you’re working as hard as you can to bring Barry back, and I shouldn’t…god I shouldn’t have been so stupid,” you were sobbing so hard you could barely speak, your breaths shuddering out of you violently before you gasped them in again. You wanted to go on, to explain to him how sorry you were, how awful you felt, how horrible it was that you, his friend, had lied to him about something so important.

Arms enveloped you then, a firm chest pressed against your face, hands cradled your head to a warm and familiar body, with long dark hair tickling your forehead. “Y/N,” Cisco’s voice seemed to surround you like his hug. “I know you’re sorry, I know you didn’t mean for things to get like this, and I forgive you,” you let out a particularly forceful sob at that, but he went on, “Y/N I’m sorry I yelled, I’m sorry I snapped at you like that, but I think we both knew it was coming.” His arms tightened around you, and yours, in turn, snaked around his back. “You’re the only one I’ve got left Y/N,” he reminded you softly, “You’re the only one, who’s been here since the beginning, you’re the last friend I’ve got who knows just how far this team has come. Joe and Iris know, but not the whole story, not the way we do, they’re not...” he trailed off, a slight tremor in his voice just before he took in a deep breath and said, “you and me, we’ve been here since the beginning, so it’s our job to keep this team going, to keep this thing alive until we can get Barry back.”

You nodded against him, your breaths finally quieting into soft little hitches, your tears now drying against your skin. “I’m sorry,” you said once more, “you’re right, we’ve got to stand together or this isn’t going to work.” You pulled away from him then, looking up into his brown eyes, the same ones that once glittered with optimism, but now appeared aged beyond their years by responsibility. Those eyes hurt to look at. “Cisco,” you said his name in a near whisper, “I believe in you.”

Those beautiful brown eyes pinched at the sides and for a moment the smile that caused it almost reached them. “Thank you, Y/N,” Cisco replied quietly, a bitter laugh accompanying it before he added, “one of us ought to.”

[imaginethemultiversedoms]

Animal Instincts - Part 2

Fandom: The Flash

Series: Part 1 / Part 2

Summary: Ava still struggles with how she is going to tell Barry she can communicate with animals and begins to have some suspicions with his new connection to Star Labs.

Warnings: There aren’t any in this part, but as I get further into the plot, I am going to start tagging anything with potential animal abuse. It will mostly be mentioned or anything that happens will be stated after the fact, but Ava does work at a rescue sanctuary. It’s a part of the job. I myself am a volunteer trainer at an equine rescue/training facility, so I hear a lot of abuse and neglect cases and deal with the ramifications of it nearly everyday. This is what Ava will deal with as well.

I just wanted to let you all know what will be going down in future parts of this series. If you have any questions on it or what I do, feel free to use the ask box or message me.

           Ava sat in the outdoor patio of Jitters, smiling at the flock of sparrows chittering in the tree next to her. As soon as they realized she could understand them, they immediately began barraging her with news of nestlings, mates, where the best food was, and general gossip of competing flocks in the park. Ava listened as she idly doodled in the notebook in front of her and sipped her coffee. A few of the more trusting sparrows fluttered down on the table, looking for a treat from her half-finished orange-glazed muffin.

           “Now listen, bread is terrible for you and your young,” Ava murmured, both out loud and through her connection. Reaching into her backpack, she pulled out a small bag of birdseed. Opening it, she poured a small pile onto the other side of the notebook. “Eat this. It’s better and tastier than any scraps you’ll pick up around here.”

           “Careful, sis. You keep that up, people will think those birds actually understand you,” Barry joked as he walked up. One of the females, the flock leader Ava had named Crown because of a crown-like marking on her head, whistled angrily at the rude male. Ava hid her wince and managed to smile up at her older brother.

           “They just like that I occasionally have birdseed with me. It’s better than bread scraps.” She smiled more genuinely when he leaned down and kissed her head. She noticed Cisco was standing behind her brother, both with coffees in their hands. “Hey Cisco.”

           “Hey Ava. How did we pass by without noticing you?” Ava shrugged.

           “This table is tucked away more. I like it cause its quieter than inside.”

           “Can’t argue with that. Wish we could hang out a bit more, but Dr. Wells is waiting for us back at the lab, Barry,” Cisco reminded. Barry nodded and hugged Ava again.

           “Everything okay? You’ve been hanging around the labs a lot since you woke up,” she asked, idly sipping her coffee. The question may have been innocent, but Barry wasn’t fooled; Ava was tenacious when it came to mysteries and secrets. On the rare occasion he was hiding something from her, she had a way of wheedling it out of him. Fortunately, he also had experience in dodging her, at least for a while. He reached to grab a piece of her muffin.

          “No more than you hanging around the sanctuary until after dark,” he fired back. She moved to smack his hand away, but he had already grabbed a small chunk. “Missed me,” he taunted around the bite. “Dr. Wells is letting me help with some of the projects in my spare time.”

          “Maybe on a day off you could come by and check it out?” Cisco asked.

           “Maybe. With the sanctuary running on skeleton crew, I’m on call more often.” It was a half-truth; Diane and Mark did let her pick up more shifts, but the crew was hardly a skeleton anymore. Cisco shrugged.

           “Whenever you get the chance. Caitlyn’s been asking about you too,” Barry answered. He kissed her head again. “We gotta go. Love you.”

           “Love you too.” She called out as the boys walked out of the patio. She leaned back in her seat, staring at her muffin. She suddenly didn’t have an appetite for the rest of her muffin. Instead, her thoughts were consumed by the conversation that just took place.

           Your flock mate wasn’t truthful, Crown peeped, hopping towards her hand. Is that normal for your flock mate?

           No more than me doing the same, Crown, Ava replied. “But it’s still odd.”

           “What’s odd?” For the second time that morning, Ava was startled by one of her siblings. This time, it was Iris who was sitting down in the empty seat. “And aren’t you jumpy?” Ava chuckled.

           “Just talking with Crown here.” She giggled when the bold sparrow hopped towards Iris’ bag. “She wants to know if you have that granola you usually have with you?”

           “You spoil them, Ava,” Iris chastised in her best “big sister” voice. Regardless, she had reached into her bag and pulled out the bag of granola trail mix, adding a small handful to what was left of the birdseed.

           “Yeah, Barry said something similar,” Ava muttered. Iris’ calm demeanor never changed, though Ava still caught her shifting slightly closer. “He and Cisco apparently spotted me on the way out. He said I needed to be careful or else people will think they understand.” She gestured towards Crown and couple sparrows who were pecking at the new treat.

           “You do need to be careful,” Iris agreed. “You have a bad habit of speaking out loud what you can tell them telepathically.”

           “But Barry doesn’t know that!” Ava slouched in the chair with a slight pout. Iris ignored it.  

           “Even more reason. I think you should work on that more than the shared mind thing. Where was Barry going today?”

           “Star Labs.” Ava stared at her muffin and the missing chunk Barry took. That was a pretty quick snatch ‘n grab. Usually, I can graze his hand. “Hey Iris?” Iris looked up from checking her email. “You get the feeling Barry is hiding something?”

           “Sometimes, yeah. Why?”

           “I don’t know. He’s been going to Star Labs a lot in his spare time. Something about helping with projects.” After a thoughtful moment, Iris shook her head.

           “Listen, we are all still adjusting to what happened and Barry realizes you’ve pulled back a bit. He’s just giving you space until you want to tell him about your ability. You did the same thing after you came to live with us.” Ava nodded, remembering that terrible year.

           “Yeah, probably. I still don’t know how I’m going to break it to them.”

           “Well you better figure it out, girl, before one of them interrupts one of those conversations you have with the tigers or they see you mind-meld with Regan.”

           “Nah, we set him free a couple days ago. I think he went off to Star City. Speaking of which, I saw you wrote that PSA about dogs going missing from yards. Any more information on that?” Iris shook her head.

           “No. Eddie mentioned he might’ve had a lead or two, but nothing substantial.” Ava hummed softly.

           “Diane’s talked about it too. She thinks there may be a dog fighting ring trying to get started and people are kidnapping potential bait dogs.” The thought of what that meant for those family pets hurt Ava deeply. Sensing her depression, Crown fluttered up onto Ava’s shoulder and began preening her red hair soothingly, peeping softly. She raised a finger and stroked the little sparrow’s head gratefully. “Mark was talking about knowing a couple guys who might have intel on that. Maybe Eddie could talk to them?”

           “I’ll tell him. Since we both have the day off, how about we go do some shopping? I feel like treating my little sister to a girl’s day.” Iris smiled as Ava grinned. She knew some well spent sister time would distract Ava from her current problems.

           “I’ve got no plans. Let me take this plate to Dani and I’ll meet you up front.” Iris nodded and left. Putting the napkin with the birdseed and granola near the bushes, Ava reached for the half-eaten muffin. Just as she was about to grab it, a spark of electricity jolted her. Yelping, she snatched her hand back, cradling it against her chest. The hair on her arm and neck stood on end as a prickly feeling raced up her arm and down her spine. Looking, she could already a small welt forming on her palm. Had she really gotten a first degree burn from static? Near the spot where Barry had grabbed a piece?

           Weird…

           You okay? Crown was still on her shoulder and had seen the whole thing. I felt that all the way up here!

          I’m fine. Go eat the rest of the seed. Tell your flock I’ll come back Tuesday before work. Crown chirped, preened a strand of blue-tipped red hair, and flew off her shoulder. Ava hardly noticed, still staring at the spot. Hesitantly, she reached for her food but nothing else happened. She’d have to puzzle it out later; Iris was waiting and her palm was burning. Hopefully Dani had some burn cream in the first aid kit, otherwise, the first stop on the shopping trip would have be CVS.

[swallowthewhale]

Since you did a shot where Reverb kidnaps Caitlin, could you do one where Killer Frost is the one who kidnaps Caitlin (yup, I love to see Caitlin kidnapped haha) and Cisco has to save her from her but he struggles to fight someone with Caitlin's face?

Here you goooo! You have awesome timing, because I was honestly so bored and couldn’t think of anything to write. Also, let’s not question how Killer Frost got to Earth 1, okay?

Read on AO3

Frostbite

If Cisco hadn’t been woken up by the vibe, he probably would have been clued in by the thick layer of ice coating the Star Labs parking lot. He manages to slide his way inside, and is very relieved that the ice ends at the doors and none of his equipment is ruined.

The relief vanishes when he finds Caitlin’s purse and jacket still at her desk, her phone placed neatly next to her tablet. Caitlin never goes anywhere without her phone. Cisco used to tease her about her habit of taking it with her even to the bathroom, until she reminded him that you’re more likely to be abducted when you’re by yourself, say, on the way to the bathroom, than around other people. Cisco stopped making fun of her, and also made more of an effort to keep his phone with him. Just in case.

He brushes his fingers over the phone, closes his eyes, and watches, nauseous, as a blue-tinged Caitlin is forced at icicle-point out of the lab.

Cisco sits heavily, rests his head in his hands and tries to breathe deeply, before calling Iris.

Caitlin sits as primly as she can with shackles on, looking down her nose as Killer Frost hovers over her.

“What do you want?” Caitlin asks, keeping her face closed off.

Killer Frost smirks. “Isn’t it obvious?”

Caitlin rolls her eyes. “I wouldn’t ask if it was obvious. But whatever it is, you’re not going to get it.”

Frost sits down in the chair across from Caitlin. “All I want is your help.”

Caitlin frowns at her for a long moment. “Kidnapping me is not a great way to ask for a favor,” she says flatly. “My friends definitely aren’t going to see it as a cry for help.”

“You would have locked me up if I had just showed up.”

“Maybe we would have,” Caitlin says. “But that doesn’t mean we wouldn’t have listened.”

Frost stands just as a breach opens behind Caitlin. Cisco hops out just ahead of a red flash, which zips around the room before coming to a halt behind Frost.

Frost’s eyes glow electric blue and the temperature plummets.

“Get away from her,” Wally shouts.

“You don’t want to do this,” Frost hisses, turning to face Kid Flash.

Cisco flinches. “Caitlin?”

Both Caitlins turn to look at him.

“Cisco!” Caitlin yells.

Cisco can’t tear his eyes from Frost, though, her jaw firms and she blasts shards of ice over Caitlin’s head. Wally unties Caitlin in a blur and brings her to the corner of the room.

“Wally, Caitlin, get out of here,” Cisco says brusquely.

Frost saunters towards him as Wally whisks Caitlin away. “What are you going to do to me, Vibe?”

Cisco stumbles backward. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

An icicle forms in her hand. “Big mistake.”

Cisco dives sideways at the last second to avoid her stab, and he lands awkwardly and goes down hard. He looks up at her, a boom shaking his hands, struggling to be let out. But all he can see is Caitlin in the way her hair falls over her face, the determined set of her mouth, the long limbs that are somehow awkward and graceful. And her eyes, amber now, and so familiar. The boom fizzles out. He meets her eyes. “Caitlin.”

“I’m not her,” Frost hisses. “Stop looking at me like I am.”

“I can help you,” Cisco says. He holds out his hand.

Cisco limps home through Earth 18, which has a light vibration that doesn’t jar his twisted knee as much as any other Earth. Iris is fussing over Wally, hovering as he eats a nutritional bar. They both look up as Cisco comes in.

Iris glares at him, hands on her hips. “What were you thinking?” she snaps. “How could you go up against Killer Frost alone?”

Cisco yanks his goggles off his face. “Iris, I’m fine. We’re just short-handed today. Harry and Jesse are on Earth 2.”

Iris’ face sets into a familiar expression. The mom-look, as Wally calls it. “And you couldn’t go get them? It’s not like you can’t Earth-hop or anything.”

He looks away and suddenly Iris’ shoulders drop.

“I’m sorry. I just - I can’t lose anyone else, okay?”

Cisco nods and hobbles over to squeeze her hand. “Where’s Caitlin?”

Wally grimaces. “She locked herself into the break room and told us to leave her alone.” He glances at Iris. “We figured you’d have an easier time getting her to come out than us.”

Cisco waves at them over his shoulder as he makes his way down the hall. He knocks first, and when he doesn’t get a response, he rattles the doorknob. It’s not actually locked, and he eases the door open slowly. Caitlin is curled up on the couch, wearing the yoga pants she keeps in her desk drawer and one of Cisco’s sweatshirts, her hair spread out over the pillow behind her.

Cisco closes the door behind him. “Hey, Caitlin.”

“I’m sorry,” she mutters into the cushion.

Cisco sits at her hip. “Excuse me, what are you apologizing for?”

She hugs herself tighter. “I should have been paying more attention. I shouldn’t have let her sneak up on me.”

He risks putting a hand on her wrist. “I really don’t blame you for not trying to fight someone who can turn you into a human popsicle in seconds.”

She turns to look at him. “She just wanted help.”

Cisco grips her wrist a little tighter. “I know.”

Caitlin blinks watery eyes at him. “Thank you for coming for me.”

He smiles. “Every time, Cait.”

She sits up and turns so he can lift his aching leg onto the coffee table and she can rest her cheek against his arm. “What happened?”

Cisco sighs. “I told her to come in tomorrow and I can make her a power dampener.”

“Why tomorrow?”

He shrugs. “I thought you might not want to be here when she came. Figured I’d give you enough of a heads up.”

“I want to be here,” Caitlin says firmly. “I guess I… I guess I want to know that it’s possible to not go evil if-”

“If you get powers?” Cisco asks gently.

She nods.

“You could never be evil, Caitlin, trust me.”

Caitlin relaxes. “I do trust you.”

[manjehaal]

In The Quiet of The Night

Read on AO3

If Caitlin had learned anything at all from the last few years, she knew that timing was everything. The correct components, a realization, a hidden secret, and a double knotted bond may fit together perfectly at some point in the timeline. But humans have always been ever-changing beings. Some need time, some move on, some try to forget, and some die. And there is absolutely nothing that can be done once that time has run out.

For instance, love doesn’t cease to be love, just because the timing is off. But sometimes, love just isn’t enough. Sometimes the winding pathway of life just leads people astray. Not everyone can wait for eternity. Not everyone can stand in the ugly shadow of rejection.

But sometimes, despite the winding pathways and the ever ticking clock, two people may get lucky. They have this moment, somewhere in the quiet of the night, where they take a breath from the chaos of their thoughts, and they just drift to each other.

--

For him it may be a restless night under the covers, pressed against a girl that makes him feel nice, that makes him even feel secure, but yet, doesn’t fill all the missing gaps. There is something in the back of his mind that causes him to remember how he once felt, back before he let his mind take the reins of his heart.

He slips away and makes his way to the window, looking out at Central City with an ache he can’t explain, with a restlessness that causes him to wish he could open a breach and slam his fists on that other woman’s door.

Maybe he would tell her what he felt during those sleepless nights after she had left him. When he used to sit up at night and feel his heart grow numb at that lack of her, reaffirming over and over to him just how deeply he had loved her. Just how deeply he still did. Even now, still did.

Maybe he would explain to her how his heart would roar with jealousy, wishing to know her completely. Wishing he could be as close to her as the girl trapped inside of her, privileged with the ability to protect her in a way he never could. But to love her in a way that even his bleeding heart begged to reach.

Or maybe, if he may get lucky, he would find himself muttering the worst “I love you” the world had ever heard, breaking the walls of time and bringing them back to that “It’s very nice to meet you.” Start over. Pretend he wasn't afraid to destroy the bond they had. Pretend he wasn’t afraid of the awestruck confusion of hearing her brotherly friend admit he felt things deeper than what he could put to words.

But no, he was alone in his girlfriend’s house, pausing for a moment.

He approached the window pane, pressing his hand against the glass, feeling the loss that he caused when he ran from the truth and tried to fill himself with love for someone that just wasn’t her. Tried, as if that could ever be good enough. As if that was something a genuinely in love person would have to do.

The quietness takes him and he puts his hands in his pockets. He wonders if the gravity of the quiet night hits her at all, or if it's just him, leaning into her warmth.

--

For her, it’s a blank expression, staring aimlessly at the ceiling. A part of her can’t believe she feels this way. Like her house was lit on fire while she slept, only for her to wake up and see everything in ruins, and realize that she is quickly dying from the intake of smoke. But no, it’s just him, and she missed her chance. The feelings crept in without warning. And so, she missed the chance to blow out the flame before it permanently demolished parts of her home.

She breathes in the quiet noise, wondering if she’ll ever breathe in his clean air, or see his free eyes again, back before he moved on from his oblivious best friend and tied himself tightly to someone he believed would actually love him.

She gazes upward, but then closes her eyes tightly, as if sending a silent prayer to whoever may be listening. To him, to God, to her own heart. She needs it to be clear that she was the one who didn’t catch up with him fast enough.

And he had waited. Oh, he had waited. But he couldn’t wait forever. He couldn’t be anything more than human.

But she wants to catch up with him tonight. Show him that her love is real. That it had always been real, but she had it all tangled up inside like a web of doubts and insecurities. She had been lost in delusions when the pieces came together, but now, now that he is happy, she can see it clearly. Now that the timing is wrong, it feels right for her.

But still, as she tries again to let go, she is drawn to him, and she stumbles to her couch, wrapping her arms around the t-shirt loose on her chest, smelling like him and causing her mind to time travel to a time when she was blissfully unaware of her love for him.

And blissfully unaware that he was hurting behind his sunny eyes, trying to push his own feelings away.

Silly girl, she tells herself. Or maybe Frost tells her. She doesn’t bother to care.

Her mind drifts to him and she can’t stop herself. She sees his face in the shadows. In the night sky. In a silhouette by the door when she glances too quickly.

--

When minds drift like that, there is always a chance that they may grasp it. Cling to that feeling and ignite the flame long blown out. If they are lucky. Very, very lucky.

Maybe not all together. One may straggle behind. One may take a moment to reassemble what they once thought was clear. What they once thought was a choice that made sense. Sometimes it may hurt. Sometimes it may bend both over backwards. But it is, in its nature, good.

Because there is a reason they are both up. There is a reason their minds drift to each other. And the reason, nobody can truly put to words. Because nobody should. Nobody should ever try.

--

He can’t take it anymore. Try as he might, he cannot love the woman beside him as much as he does that other one. He kisses her. He hugs her goodbye. He even whispers a quick “I love you” that later feels bitter on his tongue. But despite how hard he tries, there is still something missing. And he knows exactly what, or rather who, it is.

“You look tired,” that other woman says, scooting in beside him. “Late night?”

He shakes his head, but then nods. “Something like that.”

Her voice lowers as if she’s whispering something secretive. “Did you and Kamilla go out?”

He turns to face her, missing the avoidance of her eyes. “No,” he says rigidly, feeling that missing piece gape bigger, like this woman has the power to stretch him thin just as easily as fill him.

“What about you?”

She just shakes her head quickly. “No, I was home.”

“I mean, sleep? Did you get sleep?”

She avoids him again, remembering the smell of the t-shirt, and the disappointment when she realized that the silhouette by the door had been imagined. She wants to cry but she can’t feel anything. She just nods. “Some.”

They both feel the tension, but they think it must be on their side only. So they look away from each other, letting the distance widen. And it hurts so badly, but they’re sure it can’t be helped.

--

She can’t take it anymore. She just can’t let go of that t-shirt, or the nights on the sofa, or the breaches in the middle of the night when he couldn’t sleep. She remembers the smell and shade of the blue and gray paint he helped her color her apartment with. She can remember summer breezes hitting her face when they sat together on the kitchen floor. And the kitchen dancing to some popular song she couldn’t remember and soft hands she could never forget.

And he was a friend to her then.

But now. Now he is farther than ever, even though he sits just a few inches away.

“I can’t help but think,” he says, turning his seat around, “that you’re keeping something from me.”

“What would I keep from you?”

He looks like a child, searching her eyes for a sign of something. A sign of something real enough for him to try again. To let go of his attempts at love and let himself fall into it.

“Nothing,” he whispers, laughing. “Right. Right, of course.”

“Cisco.”

He lets go of the hope. “Don’t worry. Never mind.”

“What is it?”

“It’s nothing. Forget I said anything.”

But she can't. She wonders if it is possible that he feels the wedge between them as strongly as she does. That he wants to question her about it, but doesn't know where to start. With them, where can they?

--

“Caitlin, why won’t you look me in the eye?” he asks. “Why can’t you look me in the eye?”

Flurries decorate the windows, kissing the glass and reminding him that the snow is not his. That the snow is on the other side of the glass and if he opened up the window Kamilla may get cold.

The Snow.

He doesn’t mind the cold. Not anymore. He relishes in it. He needs it. It is like a reminder that she is always near.

He turns to the girl in his bed, sleeping softly, with no idea that his mind is so far away from her. And it pains him to know he will never be able to give her what he should. That he will always be tiptoeing to the window at night, searching for something else that isn’t in their home.

He is dishonest. A liar to her. A liar to himself.

He drops his head into his hands, combing through his tangled locks. He can’t do this anymore.

So he promises himself, putting his eyes on the girl, that he will offer her the kindest goodbye.

--

She wants to tell him what she is keeping from him. Perhaps, with the words out of her chest and into the air, accepted or not accepted, she may at least feel relief. She may at least be able to look herself in the eye and know that she did not lose him because of her weakness, but because he doesn't love her.

In her imagination, Cisco laughs. He laughs so hard that tears come from his eyes.

But it makes her see her own delusion all that much clearer.

That just is not Cisco.

Not the Cisco that she loves.

She makes the foolish choice to scroll through their old messages, letting her heart swell at the slow decline of messages as the days pass. Many times, it is her own fear. So she holds back. She shortens her responses.

She wishes she didn’t.

She finds herself typing, quite simply, you up?

She rests her head on the doorway as the three little dots bounce around like her startled heart.

--

He can picture apartment 301 already, and the word home echoes softly in his mind.

He sinks into the chair by the bed.

   You know I’m an insomniac. Why the hell are you up?

Her response is quick, like a retort in an argument. I need to talk to you.

He needs to talk to her too. And badly. But he isn’t ready. He needs to say goodbye first. He needs to let go of the woman sleeping beside him before he can go to Caitlin. Because if he goes to Caitlin, and he says the words, and she feels the same, he knows he will have no restraint to keep him from betraying Kamilla.

She must have noticed his silence. If you’re tired, we can talk tomorrow.

Tomorrow, he says, tucking the blanket around his girlfriend and pressing a kiss to her cheek. He cares for her. He cares for her a lot. But the I love you that he says out of habit feels dishonest.

The bright face of his friend lighting up his phone causes the guilt to hide itself. It is clear. He understands it. He understands that he will never be able to move on from Caitlin. Even if maybe he should.

He ends up on Kamilla’s sofa, somehow comparing it to the one in Caitlin’s living room, wondering why it is more comfortable there. Wondering why it is so much easier to sleep with her at the other end of the room.

Tomorrow, echoes in his head again, and he melts into the cushions, trying not to be anxious. He tries not to let his mind wander to the possibility that this talk she wants is related to the team rather than him. He fears it, pouring out his heart and soul, just to have Caitlin kindly tell him to let it go. Because he knows no matter how it may be said, the words he wants to tell her will change them. It has to. But there is already distance between them. This will either save them or break them for good.

--

He ends things with Kamilla in the early morning, saying goodbye in the most delicate way possible. In all fairness, it hurts more than he expected it to, and as he gathers his things, a single tear drips onto the windowsill.

Because he wanted it to work. He wanted it to be easy. But now he knows, it isn’t supposed to be easy.

Time has a way of its own. Time pulls Caitlin away when he reaches, and lets him move forward when she makes herself ready. Time never stops for a moment. Time never offers a helping hand. Time allows the people to reach through time, and hopefully, get lucky and make it. But time stops for no one.

Regardless, Cisco is prepared to wrestle time if he has to.

--

301.

  Home.

He places his fist on the door, hitting it only once before the door swings open to reveal his best friend. She is dressed up, much like she used to before Frost replaced her pencil skirts with jeans. She ushers him in, welcoming her with her eyes as if he has never been there before.

“Okay,” she says, and he hears her tremor.

“Okay,” he repeats, and lets his body fall into the warmth of her creamy sofa.

She’s across from him, hugging one of those familiar grey pillows and staring down at her hands. Tension cuts between them and he wonders if today is even the right time. If he’s wasting his time, showing up just to break his own heart all over again.

They are both consumed by when it should have happened, terrified today is too late.

Each moment they open their mouth to speak, they clamp it shut and let the silence bury them both.

Cisco has enough and he slips close to his friend. He reaches for her hand and rests it on her lap. He gives her a calm gaze, betraying the explosion happening in his somersaulting stomach.

“Okay,” she says, as she did before. “Okay, let’s talk.”

“You first,” he offers, as if he's trying to be a gentleman.

Her eyes glare almost, and she looks at him with confusion. “There’s something you need to talk about too?”

He nods. “Yes, but you go first.”

She panics, afraid it's all wrong again. If she goes first, she may not be available to talk about whatever Cisco needs to talk to her about. She may burst into tears. She may run away from him. It simply isn’t fair for him to let her go first.

He senses her apprehension and squeezes her hand. “Unless you’d prefer we both say what we need to say at the same time.”

“The same time?” she asks, and she’s terrified, but she nods. “Yes, okay.”

A beat of silence punctuates their panic, and they both blurt the words out at the same moment. One says,“I love you,” and the other says, “I broke up with Kamilla.”

“Cisco, I’m sorry,” she says, and tears fill her eyes.

“No, Caitlin, I’m sorry. That came out wrong.”

She looks away, growing scarlet under his worried eyes.

He breathes heavily, shaking in his cowardly body. He hates himself for not echoing her words and the elation does not hit at first. And then, he remembers what she said and he gasps inwardly, placing his eyes on her.

"I broke up with Kamilla," he says again, bringing his hands to her cheeks. "Because I love you."

There's a weird moment where they lose balance, and they look into each other, unsure.

They both know how stupid it is to be unsure. They both declared their hearts desire and they stare openly at each other with the widest dove eyes either had ever seen.

"Oh," she says, and her eyes are like cinnamon. "Oh, I see."

Her smile is dazzling.

Her smile is relief.

They can't hear the ticking clock on the wall behind them.

But one may ask, will they make it? Will the timing be alright or will it ruin them? It's a worthy question.

But in truth, they have no worries. They see each other, and their fate is entirely up to them.

[prismdreams]

Partners - Chapter 7

Caitlin

I gave myself a pep talk before considering meeting Barry for our project. It’s going to be just for the project. I’m making it a rule if I have to. I need to enforce boundaries. Barry was beginning to change me, I can feel it and I’m not sure if I like it.

I checked my watch and realized I had 30 minutes until Barry is off from practice. This is it, now or never. I haven’t heard back from Cisco, it’s only been a few hours, Christ, he couldn’t have been that mad at me. Maybe I should reach out to him and see what’s up.

On second thought, I think that might make it worse. I know Cisco; he’s the type of guy—which is every type mostly—that prefers to take care of his own aggression alone. It’s a guy thing I guess. When Cisco is ready he will talk to me.

I thought I felt someone near me; I have no idea why I was waiting near the guys’ lock rooms. I so did not want to catch Barry in his unmentionables if that is what you’re wondering. Not that they would let me in anyway. I sighed, leaning against the wall when I heard jogging near me and turned to the noise.

“Caitlin, hi.” Ronnie said, I so was not ready for this.

But I remained civil since it’s clear I am the one who’s moved on. “Hi.”

“Uh, how are you?” Now he was making small talk?

“Fine.” I didn’t want to ask if he was fine because I just didn’t care. “I gotta go.”

I moved passed him but he caught up to me. I was worried but kept moving.

“It was a long time ago Caitlin. I felt bad about it too. I still feel bad.” Ronnie said through panting because now we were both moving fast.

I stopped, turning to him; there was no way I was going to fall for that shit. “It’s been a long time, like you said. I’ve moved on.”

When I went to leave again he touched my arm gently. I really didn’t like this at all. Familiar scenes came flooding back and I just wanted them to stay buried.

“I’m sorry, for everything. I don’t know what else to say.”

I scoffed, amused he was trying to reconcile at all. “Don’t you think you said and did enough? I’m tired of this Ronnie. Just grow up and leave me alone.”

He breathed in deeply. He looked only slightly sincere but my mind was too stuck on what happened. Yes I moved on but I am tired of reliving what happened between us. There is no us. He made that clear a long time ago.

“Caitlin if I could take everything back I would. You know me. You’ve seen how I really am. We were so close, I thought…” He trailed off as my eyes started to water. Oh no he wasn’t going to trigger my emotions again.

“I’m not that naive girl anymore. You can’t bring up what’s already dead. That is what it is. Now back off. I am tired of reliving all that shit.”

“Cisco would understand. He would hear me out. He knew how you felt. It was real, it really happened and then…I had no intention of truly hurting you.”

“What you do doesn’t affect me anymore. I was hurt but I got over it.”

“Just like that?” He raised an eyebrow, not believing me. “Wow, that is what we meant to each other. Look I realize what I did and owned up to it but there’s history here. Every time I look at you I’m being reminded of those times, I miss them.”

“Good for you.” I rolled my eyes, wondering when he was going to be done already. “I don’t.”

“Not at all? You told me so many amazing things during that time. I can’t remember when I was happier. It was real Caitlin, no matter how much you’re denying it.”

“You’re right Ronnie, I did feel and say those things, but they were said before I knew who you really were.” I narrowed my eyes, continuing my speech. “Before I found out the truth, that it was all a lie. Everything…”

Ronnie smiled incredulously, “You’re going to stand there and tell me you feel nothing? That what I did was so horrible that it made you erase all those feelings you had?”

“Yes.” I said truthfully, once someone betrays me I forget they exist.

Ronnie shook his head in denial. But I wasn’t lying right now, that’s his battery surge.

“I don’t believe you. You’re either lying to me right now or you were lying to me during that time.”

“I’m not responsible for the lies you tell yourself. I’m not the one who’s being delusional now.”

“Caitlin I…” he trailed off, I thought he was going to confess those empty words again. “I want us to be friends.”

I shook my head, my blood was boiling. “You have no right to ask me that. I owe you nothing.”

I finally moved to leave but he caught my arm again, this time holding it like I was his property.

“Ronnie, let me go.” I almost begged, I didn’t want anyone to see us; I was surprised he was doing this in public.

“I wish I could. I tried to. I’m still trying to but it’s hard. What we had was like nothing else—”

“And you managed to destroy that by being you. Now let me go.”

When he pulled away I felt someone around us, there had to be someone watching us fight. I looked at Ronnie’s face and he looked like he’d been hit by a bus. I did not care. Really, I didn’t. He doesn’t deserve another chance. His lies damaged anything we had. I’m not going to relive those days again. I’ve grown too much and put a lot of distance to repair myself to backtrack.

“I know I did. I regret it. I have regrets Caitlin that I need to live with. Your friendship would be valued, I promise.”

“You are pathetic if you think I’m trusting you again. Stop it already. Enough is enough.” I practically shouted, hoping no one would hear.

Ronnie suddenly had balls of steel when he walked closer to me. I backed away with wide eyes.

“Stay away from me.” I said roughly, my voice was gravelly and menacing. I hoped it was enough to repel his efforts.

He looked defeated and all I could think of was good, about time. I couldn’t even look at him anymore.

The sprinting team was beginning to come out of the lockers and I made it my cue to leave as soon as Ronnie had his attention turned on his jock friends. Ugh, screw him. Screw these feelings. I truly have never hated anyone more than I hate him right now. I said I wasn’t going to be triggered and I was feeling like I had.

I decided to meet Barry. I liked his company. I already agreed to meet him before, and I wasn’t going to back down on studying just because Ronnie Raymond chose to screw with my emotions at the most inopportune time. If wasn’t fair to Barry if I didn’t show. I got the feeling he would be hurt if I didn’t. I don’t know, that would bother me a little.

Maybe being around him might make me feel a little better. I’m still enforcing my study rule. I just hope my residual emotions don’t show because that would really wreck everything that’s seemingly normal in my life.

I told myself this as I walked to the cafe and took out my phone, texting Barry. I sighed after sending it and took a seat near the corner, passed the clique area. Better be safe than sorry. I looked at the words I wrote smiling slightly.

To: Barry Hey, I’m at the hangout, towards the back part. I’ll see you here.

Home || Next

[dracox-serdriel]

Orion - Chapter Nine: Blood Star (Orion)

Title: Orion [AO3] [LJ] [FF] [Tumblr] Chapter: Blood Star Universe: The Flash Pairings: SnowJay (Caitlin Snow/Jay Garrick), SnowHunter (Caitlin Snow/Hunter Zolomon) Word count: 3,200 Spoilers: All episodes through 02x18 Versus Zoom and all comic books that feature Zoom/Hunter Zolomon. Rating: NC-17/MA Chapter summary: Caitlin pursues a risky surgery to try to save Hunter's life. Meanwhile, the MTU launches a major assault to win back its lost facility and Fort Greene.

Canon-divergent as of 02x18 Versus Zoom. Caitlin Snow and Jay Garrick meet under strange circumstances, but the attraction between them is immediate and the connection, real. Stranded on Earth-2, Caitlin fights for her survival against Zoom, the seemingly unstoppable meta-human who has fallen in love with her.

Set immediately after the events in 02x18 Versus Zoom, Orion includes flashbacks to missing scenes during canon episodes of the season when SnowJay was developing.

Read Orion from the beginning.

Orion Chapter 9: Blood Star

About two months ago on Earth-1... Caitlin's wheels were turning as she triple-checked her results. All of them were negative. She stared at the screen in frustration and disbelief. Every avenue she explored was just another dead end. She must've missed something, anything.

"I thought Harry was the only one living here," Cisco said as he entered the Cortex.

She glanced at the clock on her screen and balked when she saw it was nearly nine.

"I, uh, must've lost track of time," she replied automatically.

"Been doing that a lot lately," he said pointedly. "You okay?"

"No," she replied, the word escaping her without due consideration. "Jay's getting worse, and I haven't found anything that can help him. Not from our earth or his."

"Huh," he said. "Do you think there's a chance that - maybe - this has something to do with the fact that Jay wasn't, you know... forthcoming about his condition?"

A throbbing pain started in her temples. She could tell that Cisco hadn't bumped into her by accident. He must've noticed the sudden uptick in late nights and the tension between her and Jay.

"I'm gonna take your silence as admission," he continued. "And I feel you. I'm peeved about it, too, but you don't see me avoiding the man."

"I'm not avoiding him, Cisco," she replied. "It's like Jay's body is rapidly aging... cell death, and it's... I think the only reason he's survived so long without obvious symptoms was the SpeedForce, but that's been out of his system for almost a year now, and whatever's happening... it's accelerating. I don't know how to stop it, Cisco. I can't even slow it down."

"Huh," Cisco said. "Did Barry run through time again? Because I swear you said that exact same thing two nights ago. You know, the last time I found you in here after dinner."

She closed her eyes as she realized, yes, she had told Cisco all of this right after her third round of simulations failed. She hadn't slept much between then and now, and her memories from the past few days were thin and foggy.

"I'm sorry, Cisco, I - I can't..."

She didn't know how to express the countless, writhing thoughts teaming in her head, and at this point, she didn't even want to try.

"Hey, I get it," he said. "You don't want anything bad to happen to Jay. The man named Sand Demon and the Speed Cannon. We wanna keep him around. Keyword: we. Us. You're not in this alone. Even Harry's helping."

"We're - Jay is running out of time."

"It's not all on you, Caitlin," Cisco replied. Then he added, "Listen, I know my track record makes me like the last person to give advice on the subject, but it's pretty clear that he makes you happy. Happier than you've been for a long time."

"That's why we have to save him."

"We will," Cisco said. "In the mean time, maybe holding up in here isn't the only option. I'm just saying."

Now on Earth-2... Hunter took a long, settling breath as the near-constant pain pitched. The sharp edge of the scalpel was one thing, but the digging and the twisting redoubled the agony. He focused every ounce of his strength on keeping his mind calm and his body still.

He couldn't pretend the pain wasn't happening; he couldn't compartmentalize and forget it like his many psychological scars. The surgery was limited to his left arm, yet all his nerves were aflame with protest, demanding he do something - anything - to make it stop.

Each cut built upon the last, and every time he thought it couldn't get any worse, it did. He couldn't remember the last time pain affected him like this. That was probably a good thing. He needed to stay in the moment, conserve his energy, keep still so Caitlin could save him.

Do it for her.

It was coming from that part of his mind that normally wasn't trustworthy. It voiced his doubts and fears and reminded him of every mistake he had ever made. It undercut his every victory and tainted any measure of joy he eked out. And for some reason, it was the only part of him that wasn't currently screaming in agony, the only voice in his head that was making sense.

You can take the pain. Do it for her.

The weakest aspect of himself was the only one still speaking, so he listened. Like a lullaby, the precise words became lost, but the message remained strong and sure.

Do it for her.

No matter how much he wanted to scream and writhe, he resisted.

Hunter didn't know how long it went on. He kept telling himself that this was the last obstruction, so he only had to hold out a little while longer. Just a little while longer. And when he couldn't lie to himself any more, he returned to his touchstone.

Hold on. Do it for her.

"Hunter, can you hear me?" Caitlin asked. "Hunter! Hunter? Blink three times if you can hear me."

Unable to speak, he blinked three times.

"The last obstruction... it's deep," she said. "Deeply entangled with the artery... I can't remove it without compromising the blood vessel. You'll lose what's left of your blood volume in less than a minute. I can't cut it out unless I do something drastic."

"Do it," he grunted.

"If I do this, it will compromise your arm," she said. "You're weak. And you're healing is slow. Almost... almost human. If I do this, you could lose function or the entire limb, and - "

"Do it," he repeated. "Please."

"Hunter, I'm sorry," she said. "This is going to hurt."

How could the pain be any worse?

As if to answer his question, he heard the roar of a flame. Apparently, the only way to prevent him from bleeding to death was to cauterize straight through the artery. She had to burn him to save him.

He did his best to hold back, but when she turned the torch on him, he screamed.

The sound echoed for miles.

Caitlin pressed ahead despite the horrible, endless scream and the smell of burning flesh, though she knew the latter was phantosmia, her senses conjuring the odors her suit filtered out. The hollow sound of Hunter's cry continued long after she finished the cauterization. She had nearly removed the last obstruction when he fell silent.

She attempted to keep a cool head, but the abrupt noiselessness was deafening, spurring her to finish as quickly as possible. Objectively, she knew she needed to be meticulous - the procedure wasn't remotely textbook, which made closing far more complex - but it wasn't enough to quell her instinct to rush. The cauterization had reduced the amount of viable tissue, and most of what remained was too friable to manipulate. So she placed two bioabsorbable stents to reconnect and support the burned blood vessel, hoping that they were as effective as the literature claimed. As with the previous incisions, she used a medical glue designed to dissolve during the metahealing process. She couldn't help but worry about its limitations, however, given the circumstances.

Panic finally won out when there was no visible pulse in the exposed tissue after she released the hemostat. She couldn't see a visible pulse anywhere in the arm. She used her suit to check his vitals. All of them were waning.

She hastily replaced the ligaments, tendons, and muscle, layering without suture or attachment, save for the dermis, which she held together with skin glue. She then proceeded to splint the arm, making the dressing as tight as possible, immobilizing the limb.

When she turned back to his face, Hunter's eyes were closed, and he was seven shades too pale. Out of habit, her fingers went to his neck for a carotid pulse.

There was nothing.

She waved her palms over his chest, using her suit to scan for vital signs, but there was no indication of life. Respiration and heart rate were absent, and blood volume was fatally low.

Of course it was. Most of his blood was pooled around the table or spattered all over her suit. He'd bled to death.

She had warned him. She had said he'd bleed out. She told him he'd die if she tried this. What had she been thinking, even suggesting it?

She backed away from the table as the realization slammed into her: he was dead. Dead. She became acutely aware that she was elbow-deep in his blood. She'd killed Jay.

Jay is Hunter, and Hunter is Zoom.

Just a few hours ago, she would've felt better - safer, even liberated - if Zoom was dead. But in this moment, she didn't see a defeated villain or an enemy who received his comeuppance; now, all she saw was a man - Hunter - broken and bloody and lost forever.

She'd killed him.

You tried to save him. That was more than he deserved.

Caitlin felt hopeless, helpless, and furious. Wasn't watching someone she loved die once enough?

Someone you love?

She braced herself for the fallout, for the weight of everything to crash into her, but instead, all she felt was a peculiar kind of numbness. She was trapped between an urge to do something - anything - and a deep-seated denial that kept her rooted to the spot.

She blinked, and for no reason at all, her eyes fell on Hunter's motionless body. The too-pale skin of his exposed chest stood out against the coarse, black suit that still clung to half his body. What struck her was how small he seemed now, in spite of all his fury and power, all his pain and tyranny. For all the terror Zoom visited upon two universes, Hunter was so... so... human.

She didn't have anything to cover him with, but leaving him like this wasn't right. So she drew his suit over his torso, adjusted his head, and even ran her fingers down his face to make sure his eyes were completely closed.

The numbness fell away as a deluge of emotions swept through her. She felt splintered, and she hated herself for it. Feeling anything other than relief over his death was foolish, just a byproduct of his mind games and manipulations. The man devastated an entire universe. He was a monster. He deserved to die and leave no one to mourn him.

He deserved to be forgotten like a bad dream.

Caitlin turned away as her breath got caught on the lump in her throat. She steadied herself, but it wasn't enough. Her suit was too constricting, confining her every movement.

She ripped the mask off her face, desperate for more air. The cold morning air smacked against her too-hot skin, buffeting the warm tears that poured from her eyes. She couldn't stop it, no matter how much she wanted to. She couldn't think. She couldn't speak. She barely kept her feet under her as her crying escalated to an uncontrollable sob.

Maybe it was all a lie. Maybe every good thing he did was just to manipulate her. That didn't change how she felt about him.

It didn't change the fact that she'd never have a chance to know one way or the other.

She stumbled into a tree, suddenly lightheaded, probably because she hadn't had any food or water in the past twelve hours. When she tried to stand up straight, she felt the world spin around her before she collapsed.

Had she remained conscious just a moment longer, she would've felt someone catch her.

Hunter came-to abruptly, his eyes snapping open as soon as consciousness returned. It felt as if his arm and chest were impaled on a hot poker but that was infinitely better than the tearing, searing agony that had driven him into the blackness.

He distinctly remembered his heart stopping. Then... nothing. He couldn't recall anything between that moment and this, yet, instinctively, he knew it had been more than a few seconds. More than a few minutes, even.

Before he had time to reflect on his situation, the muffled sound of someone crying reached his ears. His heart stuttered through its next few beats when he wondered if she was crying for him.

Caitlin wouldn't shed tears over a monster like you.

He sat up carefully, getting the measure of his injuries. His arm was splinted stiffly, but there was no good way for him to support it once he stood upright. It flopped awkwardly to one side, inspiring an ache that went down to the bone. He nearly called out to her, but his voice failed him when he saw her stumble into a tree.

He raced to her side, and though his speed was at an all-time low, he made it in time to catch her with his good arm.

"Caitlin? Caitlin!"

Panic pushed his fatigued heart to its limit. Her pulse was steady, as was her breathing; she was only unconscious.

He swallowed hard against the lump in his throat. He wanted to hold her properly - to carry her - but the splint wouldn't give. He needed help.

"Totem!" he shouted. "Totem!"

He waited, and he couldn't help but stare as he cradled her against his chest. Her face was streaked red, and her long brown hair was plastered against her head from her cowl.

She was breathtaking.

Always.

The next few hours were the most confounding in Hunter's recent memory. Zoom couldn't be seen wounded, let alone in a cast, but removing it would risk re-injury, which was particularly problematic now that the only doctor he trusted was incapacitated.

With his options limited, he had to operate through a proxy, Totem. She had already seen him injured before, and she wouldn't dare betray him.

Caitlin was his priority, and she needed medical treatment and rest. Unable to carry her, he arranged for transport via Blink.

And that's when he found out about the boy, RJ.

Totem insisted that the child travel and remain with Caitlin, per her own demands.

In all likelihood, she had simply bonded with the youngster when she rescued him from the aftermath of the siege. She usually bonded with her parents. There was no reason to assume that this boy was special in any way. How important could he be, given that she'd set him aside when Hunter called?

Besides, the more relationships she forged on Earth-2, the less likely she would be to run, should the opportunity present itself.

So he ordered the boy's transport with Caitlin back to the Comet, where he was to be set up in her room for the time being. Then he waited, out of sight, until Blink came and teleported them away.

That's when everything began to go sideways.

It took half an hour and about nearly cheeseburgers to regain even a fraction of his strength and speed, but it was more than enough to get him running again.

He raced the perimeter of Fort Greene expecting to find resistance, but the entire facility was still and silent. Hazard and Haunt had maintained the lockdown without incident.

Yet there had been a secondary attack during the siege by a sizeable force that infiltrated the ruins of the building and activated its self-destruct sequence. For the most part, it had been foolish suicide mission that failed to kill a single metahuman, but it did force them to retreat much sooner than initially planned, which meant abandoning resources that could've been exploited. The computers alone could've provided endless information about the anti-metahuman technology being developed, not to mention the the research and surveillance on suspected metas.

Hunter had assumed that the strike force had come from Fort Greene, somehow taking out Hazard and Haunt before they could raise the alarm, but clearly that wasn't the case. So where had the unit come from?

He didn't have time to consider the possibilities, not with hundreds of metas out in the open in broad daylight, grouped around makeshift medical tents. They'd be sitting ducks for an organized military assault.

Hunter made Totem issue a full retreat, which meant prioritizing the transport of cleared individuals over procedures to remove Trojans and other malicious implants.

It was a polarizing decision that triggered a wave of resistance. Few were willing to abandon family or friends, let alone leave them behind in a warzone to endure dangerous surgeries.

The majority of it was sniping and backtalk, little more than kicking and screaming, yet Totem wasted hours quelling an uproar that never would've happened had the order come directly from Zoom.

Some of the more stalwart rebels began to linger, hiding out of sight and disrupting the already tenuous transportation schedule. He wanted nothing more than to make an example of somebody, knowing that the rest would fall in line as soon as they saw it, but his arm was too sore to remove the cast.

So he managed the situation from the shadows, occasionally knocking heads together, but mostly dragging stragglers into the open single-handedly in a flash of blue lightning so Blink could take them away.

Somehow, he kept his temper in check for the first few hours.

But then Totem caught sight of enemy forces amassing and moving in. A bird's eye view revealed that most of the troops were marching for Fort Greene, but a substantial number were heading straight for them, equipped with heavy artillery.

There wasn't time to think or discuss matters.

"Start burn site protocol," Zoom barked at Totem.

If she had questions, she didn't ask them. Neither did she comment when he ripped off his cast, freeing his arm.

It ached furiously, but he could handle the pain, especially now that he had something to distract himself with: a fight.

He took a secondary guard - Black Siren and a few of her minions, along with a new minion called Multiplex - and went to Fort Greene for Haunt and Hazard. He was pleased to find both minions already setting pitfalls and other traps for the next wave of soldiers.

Black Siren and Hazard seemed particularly invested in the various snares and deathtraps, so Zoom left them to whatever sabotage they could muster in the allotted ten minutes. He personally extracted Haunt and the Calculator. He wasn't a meta, but he had proven himself useful, which won him a modicum of protection for the time being.

By the time he and his secondary guard returned to primary location, Totem had called in the big guns. Any uninjured meta had returned, along with several injured metas who decided they were ready for another fight.

Unlike before, they didn't have the element of surprise, and their enemies had plenty of tactical advantage, not to mention drones. The ensuing fight was nothing but abject chaos; fire and brimstone with blue lightning to underscore it all.

Zoom always wins.

It was exactly what Hunter needed to burn through his frustration and rage. He tore apart drones and effortless snapped necks. He was a blur of broken bones and bloodshed, and even though his speed was still low, he felt like himself again.

Once he was done shattering these worthless foot soldiers, he would return to the Comet, victorious, and then he would finally get the one thing he wanted more than anything else: Caitlin's full allegiance. After everything she'd seen, there was no way she would side with anything other than the Cause.

Zoom always wins.

Chapter notes: The title of this chapter comes from the Kauluakoko, the Hawaiian name for Betelguese, the second brightest star in the Orion constellation. Kauluakoko means "brilliant red star" (with koko meaning "blood").

Author’s notes: I hope you’ve enjoyed the latest installment.

For next or previous chapters, go to the main Orion page.