#but ashe geeneeuinly thought of matty as a good friend who was close to him etc etc but on mattys side its harder
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I DONT HAVE THE IMAGES IRGHT NOW BUT YOU UNDETRNSAD?? YOU GET ?? YOLU GET? IM MADLY I NLOV WITH YOU TIWLIGHTRCADE MY GOOD FRIEND MY COMRADEMY RIDE ROD IE
#freak to freak communication you know ?#thank u . u r the best ever <3#i really enjoy ur rants and talkings always always.. i hope we r buried skeleton together all for meotauls#anyway matty and ahshe silluy in the way that thjey absooltuely fucking hate eahcother nad ahse has dienfitley b#locked many things out as his life froze after his family died therefore he hasnt had time to process the anger towards matty#maybe he has had anger nad bitterness towards other things but i dont feel like matty is high on his priority right now esp#since he doesnt know wher eh eis but hes still a deep rooted issue - and its not thast he hasnt accepted his familys#death exactly (thouhg i guess that is it but in other wording) its that he hasnt accepted it ending like this#he has to think about his family dead to think about summoning them back yet still i do think he does have#many delusions where they are alive and the thought of going back to them is the only thing keeping him going really#sometimes i think about how even wehn hes crossed the line and killed so#mebody hes still going on it feels like a dead corpse being raked across the floor to lose another piece of who he is once again#kid's heart#BUT THAT ISNT WHAT I WNATED TO TALK ABOUT AURGHH!!#i think that in the past maybe possuibnly you have to be another level of ill to get this far#but ashe geeneeuinly thought of matty as a good friend who was close to him etc etc but on mattys side its harder#because theres no clear intetion ill make up my own i say he did value ashe in a way but#in the end what did indeed win out was his hatred and infeoririuty towards ashe - i dont think he even wouldve goen that far#if he didnt know ashe o rmaybe he wouldve done it sooner - he would spend time with ashe normally with the thought#of how hes using him bnack in his head then go home nad the feelings would pile up pile up pile up esp since his parents#would lay the pressure on thick meanwhile whenever he went to ashes house it wa s ashining exmaple#of what he didnt hvae#and because matty is selfish. it drives him insane#i find it kinda funny how ashe got his trust broken by him leaving such a scar yet now hes#lying to people as matty was as well#i can say more but im scared.
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