#but also they could finish it off tomorrow and that's worse cos I'm working

[fazcinatingblog]

King marnus!!!!!

[javierpena-inatacvest]

Chapter 14- Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas

Summary: You and Javi celebrate your first Christmas together in Laredo

Word Count: 11.3K (could be worse?)

Warnings: SMUT (18+), unprotected p in v sex (don't be a fool, wrap your tool), oral (f receiving), face sitting (awh hell yes), creampie, praise kink, breeding kink, mentions of food/eating, mentions of grief/death (but it's sweet), children being assholes (I'm a teacher, I'm allowed to say it), our favorite idiots Carter and Miller making a brief appearance (I missed them), Javi being so sweet with kids (this does deserve a warning, I'm sorry) Javi being so kind, patient, thoughtful, amazing UGH he is too good for this earth 🥹😩

A/N: Thank you for your patience as I finally get this chapter done! Life has been absolutely crazy these past two weeks, so I'm hoping now that things have settled down, I can get back to working on chapters at a more regular schedule 🥴 If you're a Christmas girlie (gender neutral) like me, this chapter is for you, because even though it's only October, I really can't help myself (and like these two idiots celebrating Christmas together for the first time?! C'mon 🥺)

Series Masterlist Next Chapter Previous Chapter

“So you’re leaving early today to do arts and crafts? That’s a new one.” Agent Miller snickered, leaning over his desk to slap his partner, Agent Carter, in amusement as they watched their boss begin to organize his desk and pack up his briefcase, already rolling his eyes in annoyance at the grief he was about to get from his co-workers for his early departure. 

“I’m not the one doing the arts and crafts. I’m just going into her class to help, you idiot.” Javi sighed, glaring at Miller as he finished sorting the rest of his paperwork piles. 

Last week, you had asked Javi if he would be able to come into your classroom one afternoon when he wasn't busy, to help with the project you were planning for your students to give to their parents as a Christmas gift before they left for winter break. You had quickly realized that for the sake of your sanity,  what you had planned was nowhere near a one man job, and because it was a surprise gift for their families, you didn’t want to ask any parents to come into help. Javi had happily accepted, even with your adamant warnings of the case of Christmas Crazies your class had with only days left before winter break. 

“…. To help do arts and crafts. Just callin’ a spade a spade here, Peña. Does that mean we’re gonna start having craft time here, too?” Miller and Carter chuckled to themselves, smirking at Javi, now slinging his briefcase over his shoulder, making his way out of his office. 

“Listen, Miller. Give Peña all the shit you want, but I would way rather be cutting and gluing shit and throwing fist fulls of glitter in the air than working on these fucking reports.” Carter huffed, waving the file folder Miller was supposed to be working on in his face before throwing it back down on his desk. 

“Fair enough.” 

“I wouldn’t trust you dumbasses with scissors and glue if my life depended on it.” Javi groaned, raising an eyebrow at the pair before picking up one of the finished reports off of Carter’s desk, using it to point at the two on his way out. “These better be done by the time I get back tomorrow.” 

“But I’m gonna need extra time to decorate them for you, Peña!” Miller grinned, he and Carter playfully swatting at each other in hysterics, Javi flipping them off as he headed out the door. 

After his mom passed, Javi would have never thought Alma Pierce Elementary School would be a place that would hold any more relevance to him, let alone be a place that he would frequent, now that his future wife worked there. He couldn’t help but smile as he pulled into the parking lot, thinking about the joy it would have brought Lucia to see that her years of having Javi help her with her own classroom were still going to good use with you. He also couldn’t help but smile to himself as he grabbed the coffee sitting in his cup holder he had picked up for you on the way over from the station, also knowing his mom would have had some choice words to say to him if he showed up empty handed to your classroom.  

After checking in with the office, he made the now familiar route down to your classroom, weaving through the tiny bodies patterning down the hallway, screeching and squealing with what had to be uncontrollable Christmas excitement. He gently tapped at your door before opening it, a grin growing across your face as you looked up from your desk as you saw your fiancé with an extra large cup of coffee in his hands at the doorway. 

“Oh my god, you brought me coffee? I owe you my life, you are the best. Thank you.” The sigh you let out felt like the weight of the world lifted off your shoulders as you shot up to run over to Javi, giving him a big hug before snatching the cup out of his hands and taking a long swig of the caffeine you knew you were going to need to get you through the afternoon. 

“I figured you could probably use it.” Javi chuckled, pressing a kiss into the top of your head before looking around, noticing that you were the only one in your room. “Where are the kids?” 

“They’re at lunch, I was just about to leave to go pick them up. They’ve been absolute psychopaths today. I know it’s wrong to say I wanna drop kick a child out a window, but I’m real close.” You grumbled, taking another long sip of your coffee. “I don’t think I would have made it out alive today if you didn’t come in to help, so I apologize in advance for their behavior. I may or may not have told them that because you work for the police you keep track of what kids are well behaved or not to try and scare them a little.” You grimaced, knowing that the comment you had made earlier to your kids when you told them Javi was coming into help wasn’t the most ethical, but you were desperate for anything that would even remotely help control the chaos in your classroom with only 2 days left before winter break. 

“Any kids in particular I need to be on the lookout for?” Javi asked, laughing to himself as you leaned over to set your coffee on your desk before heading towards the door to go pick up your class from the cafeteria. 

“Oh… you’ll know them when you see them.” 

You closed the door behind you, giving Javi a quick wink, leaving him alone in your classroom to wait for the arrival of the promised circus show that was your students. He wandered over to your desk, peeking through the piles of papers, sticky notes of to-do’s and drawings your students had given you. On the wall by your calendars, there was a photo of you and your family, 2 of you and Javi, and a note that he had written you one day and stuck in your lunch box, scribbled down in his rushed handwriting 

Te amo mucho, hermosa. Have a great day.  

-J 

He thumbed gently at the wrinkled note, smiling to himself, still in awe of how the pieces of him seemed to follow you in everywhere you went. The sweet moment was quickly interrupted by the sounds of little voices bursting through the doorway, chattering away as they rushed to go sit on the carpet at the front of the room. 

“Who’s that guy?!” A boy’s voice asked, pointing in Javi’s direction before balling up his body and doing a literal somersault across the carpet. 

“It’s Mr. Peña! Do you not remember when our teacher told us before lunch that he was coming, dummy?” A girl’s voice responded, rolling her eyes at the boy, now laying face down on the floor. As more and more kids came over to the carpet, the more and more voices began to chime in. 

“Don’t call him a dummy, Angela, that’s mean!”

“Well he is!” 

“Why does that guy have a mustache?” 

“My uncle has a mustache!” 

“When are we going home?” 

“Miguel tried to kick me in the nuts at recess!” 

“I did not!” 

You buried your hands in your face, letting out a deep sigh, shaking your head before looking back at Javi, quietly mouthing “I’m so sorry.” across the room before making your way to the front of the class. 

“If you can hear me, clap once.” 

3 or 4 half hearted claps followed over the chatter. 

“If you can hear me, clap twice.” 

More students began to join in, curious to see that Javi was now also following your directions. 

“If you can hear me, put your hands on your head and turn off your voice.” 

Finally, the volume of your room began to ease, all of your students, and Javi, quietly looking at you with their hands resting on top of their heads. 

“Okay, 3rd graders. Right now, we are going to work on our holiday presents for our grownups we’ve been talking about all week. Remember how I told you this morning that we have someone special coming in to help today?” The class nodded, eyes glued on Javi. “This is Mr. Peña. Can you guys say hi?” 

“Hi, Mr. Peña!” The class waved at him, Javi now smiling and waving back at them. 

“Mr. Peña is taking time out of his day to come help us with our project, so we need to show him what a respectful, responsible and safe class we are, okay? If we can follow directions and everyone gets their project done, then we will have time for extra recess at the end of the day.” Javi snickered at the silent grins and high-fives on the carpet in hopes of bonus time outside. “Once you glue your picture on your plate to make your snowglobe, you can come see me to put the snowflakes inside, and then take it over to Mr. Peña and he’s going to hot glue it for you.” 

A tiny hand quickly shot up, waving it back and forth. “No, Miguel. You cannot use the hot glue gun. It’s a grownup's only job.” You tried your best not to roll your eyes as Miguel frowned and put his hand back in his lap, knowing damn well he would be one to try and hot glue his hands together. “Do we have any questions before we start?” Almost all of your class’s hands shot up immediately, all beaming at Javi, frantically wiggling their arms in the air. You laughed to yourself, knowing that none of them had any questions about the project, and just wanted to talk to Javi. “Are these all just questions for Mr. Peña?” The class nodded, now squirming in their spots. “Okay, we can do 3 questions right now, and maybe if we have time at the end we can ask him some more questions. Is that okay, Mr. Peña?” 

“Uh, yeah. Yeah, sure.” Javi smiled, trying his best to keep from smirking at you and your teacher voice that seemed to be having a much stronger effect on him than he had intended.  

“Okay, Mr. Peña is going to pick 3 people who are sitting on their bottom and are waiting quietly and patiently for a turn.” You couldn’t help but smirk back at him as he stepped next to you on the front of the carpet, nervously running his thumb over his knuckles to prepare for his interrogation from 8 and 9 year olds. He pointed over to a girl at the back of the group, nodding to her to ask whatever was on her mind. 

“So you’re marrying our teacher? Do you love her? Have you ever kissed her before?” The entire class erupted with giggles as Javi’s face went red with embarrassment. 

“Uh,  yeah. I love her a lot and that’s why we’re getting married.” Javi leaned over to whisper in your ear as the kids continued to snicker. “Am I allowed to answer the last part?” 

“We’re not gonna talk about kissing at school, okay, Maya?” You laughed, giving Javi a little nudge as he pointed to the next student, picking a boy this time, in hopes that he wouldn’t have intense questions about his love life. 

“Our teacher said that you work at the police station. Have you ever arrested anyone? Do you catch bad guys?” One of the boys asked, the rest of the class leaning in with intrigue. Javi rubbed his hand over the back of his neck, trying to maneuver another hard hitting question. 

“Well I uh, I help train the guys who catch the bad guys, I don’t actually go out and catch them.” 

“SO YOU DON’T THROW PEOPLE IN JAIL?!” Miguel shouted out, barely letting Javi answer his question. 

“I’m gonna throw you in jail, Miguel…” you muttered under your breath, hiding your face behind Javi’s shoulder, the both of you trying to contain your laughter. 

“No, I don’t. Uh okay, last one.” He pointed to another girl who had been patiently waiting with her hand raised the entire time Javi had been sharing. 

“One time, my grandpa punched my dad in the face, and they kept punching and punching and so then my mom called the police, and then he had to go to jail and my Grandpa kept yelling you motherfu-.” 

“OKAY, on that note we’re gonna start with our projects, everything is already on your desks. Come see me for snowflakes and Mr. Peña for gluing both pieces together.” Your eyes widened in horror, jumping in to try and cut her off before she could finish the rest of her thought. It had thankfully seemed like the rest of the class had been oblivious, racing back to their desks to work on their projects. You pinched the bridge of your nose before rubbing your fingers against your temples, trying not to wither away from the embarrassment your class had decided to subject you to with their questions for Javi. 

“... I am so sorry.” You sighed, shaking your head as you looked over at Javi, trying his best to keep from laughing at the antics your class was already up to before they had even started working on their project. 

“Is this what it’s like every day?” Javi’s eyes widened as he looked out at the classroom, already overwhelmed by the noise and bodies moving everywhere. 

“It’s normally not this bad, I swear I’m a good teacher. With it being 2 days before break, as long as everyone makes it home alive, I’m calling it a win. Thank you again for coming to help, Jav. You okay to man the hot glue station?” 

“Of course, Osita.” He smiled, giving your hand a little squeeze. 

“Miguel will legitimately try to glue his hands together, so just be… extra careful when he comes around.”  

You couldn’t have been more thankful that Javi had agreed to help you with your project, because passing out confetti snowflakes alone was enough to make you lose your mind, let alone try and glue things together, too. Through the chaos, you and Javi found yourself exchanging quick glances, quietly laughing to yourself at the craziness. You couldn’t help but stare a little longer as you watched Javi your students, patiently helping each of them, listening to them share about who they were planning on giving their handmade gift to, complementing them on their work,  and carefully monitoring to make sure no one (especially Miguel) got too close to the hot glue gun. You’d be lying if  you said it ever got old watching how goddamn sweet he was with any kid he talked to, making your heartbeat a little faster at the thought of how much sweeter he’d be when it was one of your own. 

By some miracle, everyone had finished with their gift before it was time for gym, glady sending them on their way to go burn off some excessive energy to help you through the last few hours of the day. Javi’s mom had clearly trained him well, coming back to find him helping to clean up the leftover mess from your crafts after dropping your class off. 

“You don’t have to help clean up, Jav. You’ve already done more than enough.” You sighed, sitting yourself on top of the desk Javi was next to, reaching out to grab his hand. 

“Osita. If this is what you do every fucking day all day long, the least I can help you do is clean up. Jesus Christ, this was fucking exhausting.” 

“Well, I really threw you into the worst of it, so I apologize. Thank you again for helping. The kids really liked you. They kept asking the whole way to gym when you were going to come back. I told them when they stopped acting like a pack of wild monkeys, maybe you’ll consider.” You and Javi laughed, Javi gently resting his hand on your knee, thumb circling against your jeans. 

“I’ll come back any time, Hermosa. Getting to watch my hot, future wife kick ass at her job is way better than having to harp on Carter and Miller to run the reports I ask them to every goddamn day. I’m more than happy to stay if you need more help, but I figured since I took the rest of the afternoon off, and I have a genuine appreciation for a fraction of how fucking hard your job is, I would go home and make whatever you want for dinner and finish up shit around the apartment so we can spend tonight doing whatever you want.” You smiled up at Javi, reaching your hand under his chin, pulling it closer to you to plant a quick kiss on his lips. 

“Someone’s really trying to make sure they make their place on the Nice List before Christmas.” You smirked, raising an eyebrow at Javi, crossing your arms over your chest. 

“You deserve it all, Osita. It’s seriously the least I can do. Although, the things I wanna do to you later are definitely gonna end me up on the Naughty List.” He gripped his hand around the meat of your thigh, giving it a long squeeze as he placed a tender kiss on your lips, trying to use every ounce of self control to remember he was still at your work, let alone an elementary school where an 8 year old could come busting through the door at any moment. 

“You’re such a fucking dork. You’re lucky I love you so much.” You rolled your eyes, playfully swatting at him. “Thank you, Jav. You really are the best. Can we do breakfast for dinner?” 

“I had a feeling that was what you were gonna ask for.” 

“Breakfast is the superior food at all hours of the day, and no one can convince me otherwise.” 

“Pancakes or waffles?” 

“Surprise me.” 

You pecked a quick kiss onto Javi’s cheek before sliding off the desk, wrapping your arms around him, giving him a hug, pressing your face into the fabric of his dress shirt, savoring the familiarity of his sweet and spicy cologne that had become the scent that smelled like home. “Alright, as much as I don’t want you to leave, I probably should be a good teacher and print the rest of the things I need and salvage a survival plan for the next two days before the gremlins get back.” 

“I’ll see you at home, Hermosa. Love you” 

“Love you too.” 

With one last squeeze, and a wave as he headed out the door, Javi left you in your empty classroom, looking out at the disaster left in your student’s wake. Christmas couldn’t come fast enough. 

Anything that you had planned for the afternoon had quickly gone out the window after your class had returned from gym, your plans for an extra long recess turning into an even longer recess, and part of a movie before sending the kids on their way home. Some way or another, you were able to drag yourself home, the promise of breakfast food keeping you afloat the entirety of your drive home. 

As you walked down the hallway of your apartment, you could hear the quick pops and sizzles of the bacon Javi was cooking over the muffled Christmas music in the background. Turning your key in the lock on the doorknob, you pushed the door open, immediately dropping your school bag and kicking off your shoes, practically falling to the floor from exhaustion. Before you could even turn around to greet Javi, you felt his arms reaching under your legs and around your shoulders, making you squeal as he scooped you up, carrying you across the entry way towards the living room. 

“Hi?” You laughed, looking up at Javi in confusion as to why you had barely made it 2 feet into your apartment before he was picking you up and carrying you away. 

“Hi.” He smiled down at you, giving you a little shake in his grip. 

“Can I ask why you’re carrying me? Am I not allowed to walk anymore?” You guestrued down at the ground, watching your legs dangle with each step Javi took. 

“Because you work harder than anyone I know, and after today, if I’m fucking tired, you must be fucking exhausted, and my amazing, beautiful future wife deserves to relax.”

 He paused, tilting his head down to give you a kiss before turning his body the opposite direction. You had been so focused on Javi as he carried you from the doorway, you hadn’t even realized what was set up in the living room until he had shifted his position, facing you towards it. You looked over to see a blanket fort built between the ends of the couch, TV paused and ready to watch “It’s A Wonderful Life”, and the Christmas tree the two of you had decorated together lit up and twinkling, casting warm shadows on the walls. “Pajamas are in there, so change, lay down and I’m bringing you breakfast while we watch the movie.” 

You could feel the tears welling in your eyes as you looked out at the living room and back up at Javi. “Javi, you didn’t have to-” 

“I know, I didn’t have to do anything. I wanted to. I know how much you love Christmas and how we haven’t done much to celebrate since you’ve been busy with work, so I wanted to do something for you.” A grin grew across Javi’s face, watching your jaw hang open in shock as he set you down, letting you go over to examine his blanket creation. You stood there, shaking your head in disbelief, wondering to yourself how the hell you had gotten so lucky that someone cared enough about you to make you dinner after a long day, let alone plan something special for you, even if it was just in your living room. Before you could even respond, Javi was heading back to the kitchen to turn off the beeping timer of the oven, gesturing over to the fort. “I’ll be in there in a second.” 

“Javi, you set this all up for me, at least let me help with dinner or-” 

“Osita. Go put on pajamas and lay down. I swear to God, you’re the only person I’ve ever met that needs more convincing to go sit and relax than get up and do things.” He laughed, pointing at the covered couch, demanding you to get in. You held your hands up in defense before kneeling down to peek under the blankets Javi had draped over the top to see your comforter, all the pillows and blankets you owned, and your favorite sweatshirt and sweatpants of Javi’s folded neatly on top of everything. You quickly stood back up, unzipping and shuffling out of your jeans, trading them out for the sweatpants before stripping yourself of your shirt and bra, peeking around the corner to see Javi biting down on his bottom lip, eyes glued to you as you slipped his sweatshirt over your head. 

“I should have known better than to think you would have put out clothes for me to change into for any other reason than your own selfish gain, Javier Peña.” You jabbed, Javi shrugging as he grabbed two plates of the breakfast that he had finished cooking, bringing them back over to you. 

“Me? Wanting to watch you change on purpose, knowing damn well you were gonna take your bra off before you put my sweatshirt on? I don’t know what you’re talking about, Osita.” He smirked, a devilish grin growing across his face as he ducked into the fort, giving you a quick wink. 

“You? Wanting to see my boobs? Yeah, you’re right, how silly of me.” You groaned, voice oozing with sarcasm as you followed him, snuggling yourself under a blanket as Javi handed a plate over to you. “In all seriousness, this is really sweet of you, Javi. Thank you. Didn’t picture you as a big blanket fort kind of guy.” You giggled, giving him a little nudge. 

“I would make them all the time when I was little. Especially with my mom. I’d play with Hot Wheels in there, or my mom would read with me- I don’t know, maybe it’s from being with you at school today, and thinking about her, but I got home and thought you’d like it. You seem like someone who made their fair share of blanket forts as a kid.” Javi’s face beamed with a soft smile, the dimples of his cheeks creasing as he grinned over at you. 

“That’s really sweet. She sounds like she was the best mom. That’s a lot sweeter than my memories of building forts. My brothers and I had a pretty much permanent one set up in the basement made from old hockey sticks, but it was referred to in our house as Pound Town. We would go in and beat the shit out of each other with pillows until it collapsed on us and we’d have to pause, try to build it again, and beat the shit out of each other with pillows as we argued about if we were building it right or not. My parents let it slide because we weren’t annoying them, until one day when Patrick and I got in a huge fight about which couch cushions to use and he took one of the hockey sticks and hit me in the face and gave me a black eye. Pound Town was no more after that.” You grimaced, taking a bite of one of the  chocolate chip pancakes Javi had put on your plate. 

“I’m pretty sure at this point, you could tell me that you and your brothers robbed a bank and I wouldn’t be surprised.” 

“We were always well behaved during December, though. My parents definitely played into the threat of being on the naughty list as soon as Thanksgiving was over. At least they got a few weeks of peace each year. I honestly think that my parents were just as excited for Christmas movies as we were, because it at least gave them an hour and a half of semi-silence.” You laughed, nodding your head towards the TV. 

“I’m gonna be honest, Osita. I don’t blame them.” You sighed, leaning your head against Javi’s chest, feeling it rise and fall with each small huff of laughter. “We don’t have to watch “It’s a Wonderful Life” either, I just know you said you liked it and we didn’t get to watch it yet.” 

“No, this is a perfect pick. It’s one of my favorites. You wanna start it?” Reaching over for the remote, you smiled at Javi as he nodded, pressing play as the title credits began rolling across the screen. Javi had quickly come to learn that if you liked a movie, not only were you willing to watch it a million times, you knew just about every line, like you were putting on a one man production of whatever it was you were watching. Although you always quoted everything to yourself under your breath, something about it made Javi’s heart melt, spending more time looking over at you, whispering the lines of the movie to yourself, rather than watching whatever was on the screen. In between bites of breakfast, Javi watched your cheeks turn rosy as you watched a little George and Mary on the screen, eating ice cream at the drugstore, Mary leaning down to whisper in George’s ear. Javi had only seen the movie a handful of times, knowing it nowhere near as well as you, but well enough to know the line you mouthed to yourself wasn’t quite right. 

“Javier Peña, I’ll love you ‘till the day I die.” 

The two of you munched away at the rest of your breakfast dinner, Javi taking both of your empty plates back to the kitchen before nestling back under the blankets, wrapping his arm around your shoulder as you laid your head against his chest. Now watching George and Mary throw stones through the windows of the old, abandoned house, making wishes of what they hoped their lives to be, you snuggled closer to Javi, draping your arm over his waist, twisting the ends of his t-shirt between your fingers. 

“I can’t believe they’re actually gonna start building the house in a few weeks.” You looked up at Javi, beaming with excitement. After Javi’s proposal, both to be his wife and to build the two of you your dream home, you both had been working to draft up and finalize plans for construction to physically start happening. All of the design process had been smooth sailing so far, you and Javi easily agreeing on things you wanted for the house- layouts, designs, sizing- the only thing that was stopping you from moving forward with progress was deciding how many bedrooms the house was going to have. 

“Not too late to tell Danny we need to add another bedroom.” Javi teased, gently squeezing your arm. 

“I think 5 bedrooms is plenty, Mr. Ambitious. If we have more than 4 kids, we might as well add enough rooms to house a baseball team.” 

“I’ll give you a football team’s worth of kids, if you want it.” 

“I know you would, but you’re not the one who has to push a football team’s worth of kids out of you.” You laughed, playfully swatting at Javi before he wrapped his arm around the small of your back, flipping you so that your chest was caged with his, bodies laying pressed against each other. 

“I’m happy with 1 kid or 10. Whatever you want, Osita, I’ll give it to you.” Javi smiled softly, brushing a stray piece of hair from your face before cupping your jaw in his palm, thumb delicately circling across your skin. 

“What if I want you?” You whispered, stretching your head up to nibble at his chin, planting kisses along his face and neck, each one more desperate and hungry than the last. 

“You have me, Hermosa. Forever.” He reached down, grabbing your left hand, carefully twisting the gold and diamond band around your finger in his. It wasn’t long before his hand had left yours, beginning to roam down your shoulders and back before slipping under the waistband of your sweatpants, grabbing handfuls of your ass as you pressed the weight of your hips further into his, feeling his bulge starting to grow underneath you. Working his hands back up around your hips, he pushed your sweatpants and underwear down your legs, slightly raising your lower half to help Javi strip them off your body, leaving your lower half exposed. Javi’s grip tightened around your thighs, suddenly locking his arms around them, scooting you closer to him, now sitting on his chest. 

“Javi, what are you-” You protested, taking a second to realize what Javi was prompting you to do. 

“Wanna take care of you, sweet girl.” He rasped, continuing to pull you closer towards him, now sitting on him near his collarbone, as he cut you off. 

“Are you sure, Jav?” You asked, biting down on your lip, looking down at Javi, lust pooling in the dark brown of his gaze, a devilish smirk stretching across his lips. “I’m always worried I’m gonna suffocate you when we do this.”

“I’m still alive, aren’t I? Baby, if I die between your thighs from you sitting on my face, I’ll die a fucking happy man. Please?” 

“Okay, okay.” You nodded, letting out a little, breathy laugh as Javi tugged you one last time, your already dripping heat hovering over his face. You began to slowly lower yourself down, Javi’s fingertips gripping the flesh of your hips, forcing you to shift your weight onto him, making you moan as you felt his strong nose brush against your clit. You could feel the width of his tongue dragging along your cunt, slowly and deliberately working himself along your sensitive bundle of nerves. His face nestled between your legs, he took his time with each lick, taking extra time to press harder on the spots he knew made you weak, loving how wrecked he could tell you already were as you rolled your hips over his face. You could practically feel his smirk buried in your pussy as the movements of his tongue became more precise, flicking at your clit making you whimper as you braced yourself on the edge of the couch, grasping at the cushions. 

“Javi… Fuck, oh my god.” You whined, feeling the tension begin to build in your belly as Javi wrapped his plush lips around your mound, sucking feverishly as you rocked your hips back and forth, grinding down harder, the hairs of his mustache brushing against your thighs. You could feel him hum in approval against your cunt as your back began to arch, a familiar tingle growing at the base of your spine as his mouth latched firmer around your clit, desperate to make you come undone. 

“Fuck, baby- oh shit- Javi, don’t stop, fuck, fuck, I’m so close. Fuck, I’m- mhhhmmmmmm.” Your orgasm crashed through you, pleasure overtaking your body as you came, whimpering and moaning Javi’s name as he dug his fingers deeper into your flesh, holding you against him as he continued to work you through your high.  Your body went slack, draping your upper half over the edge of the couch as you felt Javi scoot out from under you, looking down to see his face glistening in your slick, accompanied by a boyish grin as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as he gazed back up at you. 

“Goddamn, Hermosa. Fucking soaked me. That feel good, pretty girl? You want more?” You nodded frantically at him, still at a loss for words as your chest heaved with each shaky breath. Gently grabbing your waist, he shifted you down so your back laid buried in the comforters and head rested against a pile of pillows, planting soft kisses down your body as he quickly pushed his sweatpants and boxers down his legs, freeing his painfully hard cock, its tip already dripping with precum, staining the fabric of the pants and underwear it had been straining against. He reached down, stroking his dick as he lined himself up with your entrance, running his tip through your folds, already soaked with your slick from your last orgasm, before slowly pressing inside you, letting you savor every inch of his length buried deep inside you. His hips flushed against yours as he bottomed out, his fullness stretching you open with the sweet sting that had become one of your favorite feelings in the world. “Always so wet for me, Osita. Fuck, I can’t believe this perfect fucking pussy is mine forever. You’re mine forever.” He mewled, slowly pulling himself back before pressing deep inside you again, each stroke making you feel even fuller than the last. 

“Forever.” You whispered back, your voice trembling as his cock pushed further into your cunt, practically hearing the lewd noises of wetness between the both of you as he thrusted in and out. Sitting back on his heels, Javi hooked his arms under your legs, pressing them to your chest, gently rubbing circles against your already throbbing clit before sinking back into you, the stretch of the new angle and added sensation of his fingers making you whine as your arms wrapped around his shoulders, fingernails digging into your back. “Fuck, Javi. You feel so big, fuck, it feels so good.” 

“Fuck me.” Javi hissed, the rhythm of his hips hitting yours beginning to become more rapid and desperate as he watched you writhe under him. “You’re fucking perfect, Osita. Gonna be a perfect wife, a perfect mom, fuck- I can’t wait to marry you, live in our house- oh shit- Fill it with our kids. Fuck, te lo daré todo (I’ll give you everything).” 

Everything was making your mind go blank- his words, his fingers rubbing against your clit, his cock pounding into you, over and over in the spot that had you seeing stars. The coil in your belly began to build as Javi buried his face in the nape of your neck, nipping and sucking at your pulse point, his words hot and heavy on your skin. You could feel your cunt beginning to clench tighter around his length, your heart beating fast as your orgasm began to build with each push and pull out of your heat. “I know you’re close, baby. Give it to me, Hermosa. Cum all over my cock. Gonna fuck myself so deep inside you, shit, can’t wait until I can fuck a baby into you, wish I could make myself stick, fucking get you pregnant right now.” 

Just like that, something inside you snapped, your body tensing as you felt yourself squeeze around Javi’s dick, soaking him as your orgasm ripped through you. A string of expletives and his name fell from your mouth, your brain short circuiting from the overwhelming intensity, sobbing into his shoulder as you came. It wasn’t long until Javi was close behind you, rapidly chasing his own high as he pounded into your heat, dripping with your slick. “That’s it, baby. Such a good girl. Fuck, I’m not gonna last much longer. Meirda- so wet and tight for me. Oh fuck, fuck, I’m gonna cum too, holy- ahhhhhhh.” Javi gritted his teeth as he thrusted one last time, spilling deep in your walls, making sure to milk himself of every last drop as he slumped on top of you, your chests rising and falling in unison as you tried to catch your breath. 

“Jesus Christ…” You laughed to yourself under your breath, reaching up to run your hand through Javi’s curls, dark and damp as they stuck to his forehead. “Javi, if you keep saying shit like that when we fuck, I am gonna end up pregnant before we get married.” 

“And that would be a bad thing because…” Javi smirked, pressing a tender kiss against your lips, feeling his grin on your mouth. 

“Javi!” You giggled, rolling your eyes and playfully swatting at his bare chest as he hovered over you, gently twisting his fingers through the messy ends of your hair. “We have talked about this! Once we’re married and the house is all the way finished, then I’ll toss my birth control in the trash. But until then, you’re really making it work unpaid overtime, you menace. I hate to break it to you, but keeping your dick inside me isn’t gonna do anything for you right now.”

“Like you don’t like it.” He chuckled, the both of you letting out a little hiss at the loss of Javi being buried inside you, feeling the mixture of your spend drip down your thighs as he laid back down next to you, wrapping his arm around your back, pulling you closer as you rested your head on his chest, hiking your leg up over his hip. “I’m just saying, Osita, Christmas is only a few days away, you could just throw it away early and-” 

“JAVI!” You scolded him, giggling as he raised an eyebrow at you, giving a little shrug. “You will get plenty of other presents. That one’s gonna have to wait, as much as I don’t want to either. The house should be done right around the same time as the wedding anyways, so you won’t even have to wait that long.” 

The two of you had very easily decided that you didn’t want a big wedding by any means, bringing Chucho endless amounts of joy when you had asked him if you could have your celebration at the Peña ranch. The thought was the first thing that came to both you and Javi’s minds- something small and simple, really only wanting your close friends and family to join you on your big day in a place that held such importance to the both of you. While you and Javi had agreed that you would have married each other tomorrow, you had compromised with the middle of June, giving you a few weeks after the school year had finished to let you have some time to prep or plan anything else that needed to happen, without the end of the year school stressors on top of it.

 After working with Javi’s cousin, Danny, (who finally received your finalized floor plans a few days ago after finally compromising on your bedroom count), he was able to guess that given that the winter was normally less busy for him and his crew, he would also hopefully have the house done by mid to late June, planning to have the majority of the work completed after you came back from your Honeymoon,  you and Javi offering to finish up any last touches that he wouldn’t be able to get to after you returned. 

While the both of you had agreed that you would wait until you were married before your birth control prescription was canceled, never to be seen again, you managed to talk some sense into Javi, telling him the house needed to be finished before you started trying, God forbidding that something went wrong, leaving you who knows how pregnant in an unfinished house. Regardless, it hadn’t stopped Javi from the moment that ring went on your finger to play into just how badly he was ready to give you the family you deserved, making it very hard for the both of you to stick to your plan. 

“I know, I know.” He sighed contently, picking your arm up, draping it over his chest so he could play with the ring on your finger, delicately thumbing at the stone and gold band. “Knowing I get to spend the rest of my life with you is the only fucking Christmas present I’ll ever need for the rest of my life.” 

“You’re really trying to make your way back onto the Nice List, huh?” You giggled, biting down on your lip as you reached up to grab Javi’s face, giving it a little shake. “You’re all I’ll ever need, too, Javi.” A cheeky smirk spread across your face as you looked up at Javi, pressing a hot kiss against the skin of his neck before you spoke. “I gotta shower and clean this mess up, you wanna come with me and hang out on the Naughty List just a little bit longer?” 

“I’d take coal in my stocking any fucking day for you.” 

Someway or another, you managed to make it through the last two days of school, bribing your class with more play time, recess, and movies than you’d like to admit. You and Javi were planning to spend the second half of your break with your family in Chicago, giving you two a few days to celebrate your first Christmas in Laredo together, now that you were on break. You had agreed to spend Christmas Eve celebrating with Chucho, the 3 of you gathering at the Peña ranch in the afternoon, offering to help Javi’s dad with chores around the farm since he had graciously given everyone else the day off to spend with their families. It took no convincing on your end to go out and help Javi feed the animals, one of your favorite chores on the farm, especially when it came to the cows. 

“I can’t believe how big they are.” You cooed, scratching one of the not so baby cows you had met for the first time a few months ago along its nose, giggling as it gave you a little lick. 

“They don’t stay little and cute for very long.” Javi chuckled, throwing the last bale of hay over the fence into one of the troughs, wiping his hands along his plaid shirt before resting his arm around your waist, standing next to you as you continued scratching and petting the rest of the cows that had gathered looking for attention. 

“Excuse you? They are still incredibly cute! Apologize to these sweet babies!” You gasped dramatically, holding your hand over your chest as you swatted at Javi. 

“Hermosa, they’re cows. They’re loud and annoying once they’re full grown, and last time I checked, I don’t think they can understand what I’m saying.” He laughed as you looked back at him with fake disgust, taking a step back, crossing your arms over your chest. Before you could argue back, one of the cows let out a long, loud mooooo, pointed in Javi’s direction, turning to look back at the cow before looking back at Javi. 

“I think that’s cow for fuck you, I am cute.” You smirked, giving Javi a little shrug as you nodded back at the cow. 

“Whatever, you dork.” Javi sighed, rolling his eyes at you as the two of you grabbed the rest of the feed buckets, heading back to the truck. 

The two of you finished your rounds and  you and Javi made your way back to the house to find Chucho humming away in the kitchen, chopping and dicing up vegetables to throw into his simmering pot of broth for the Pozole he had promised Javi for their Christmas Eve meal. 

“Chucho, do you think that cows are cute?” You questioned, kicking off your shoes at the door, Javi following behind, shaking his head. Chucho chuckled to himself, wiping his hands along his worn apron before picking up his wooden spoon to stir his stew. 

“Why are you asking?” He asked, looking over at you as you made your way into the kitchen, popping a leftover piece of pepper into your mouth, talking between chews. 

“Because your son doesn’t think they are, and had the audacity to tell the cows to their face they were, in fact, not cute.” You glared over at Javi, trying to hold back your laughter as you pretend to be stern. 

“They’re cute when they’re little but once you have to deal with them every day, full grown, they’re a pain in the ass.” Javi sighed, following behind you, sneaking between you and his dad to take down some bowls out of the cabinet, setting them on the table. 

“That is because Javier never pays attention when he walks through the pasture, and always ends up with a boot full of cow shit. I think they are cute, Mija. Not as cute as some other animals, or as cute as human babies…” He paused, raising an eyebrow at the two of you, smirking. “But yes, still cute.” 

“Told you so. You can’t blame the cows for your shit shoes, that’s on you, Jav.” You giggled, hitting him in the chest before grabbing spoons and napkins to set down next to the bowls Javi had placed. “Do you need help with anything else, Chucho? It smells delicious, I’m glad your cow bashing son requested it tonight.” 

“Cabrón (asshole).” Javi groaned. “Mamá would always make pozole and tamales for everyone on Christmas eve. She would put all of the cousins to work kneading the dough and assembling the tamales. She would hold the piñata hostage until we helped her finish, which I can’t blame her for. Her tamales were delicious, but I always think about having her pozole and eating a shit load of candy before crashing on the couch trying to stay up, waiting for Santa when I think about Christmas.” 

“Before Lucia died, every year we would host our whole family here for Christmas eve. Dios Mio, there must have been 30 crammed in here each year, singing and dancing, making more tamales than anyone could count. No matter how hard he tried, Javier would always be the first to fall asleep on the couch, and we would have to carry him to bed. I think he would get so excited he would wear himself out.” Chucho smiled, turning off the stove, bringing the pot of the pozole to the kitchen table, the two of you pulling out a chair to take a seat. 

“She sounds like she was such a fun lady. I wish I could have met her. And eaten her tamales, because I bet that they were amazing.” You beamed, looking over at Chucho and Javi, Javi now settling into the seat next to you, draping his arm over the back of your chair as Chucho stayed standing, letting out a content sigh as he placed a hand on his hip. 

“Well Mija, I was planning on giving your Christmas gift to you later, but now that you bring it up, now seems as good a time as any.” Chucho smirked, waddling his way over to the living room, as you and Javi glanced at each other in confusion, waiting for his return. A few moments later, Chucho was back, carrying a small, red package with a white ribbon wrapped around it, outstretching it towards you. 

“Chucho, you didn’t have to get me anything, I-” You protested, not accepting the gift until Chucho was sliding it across the table, placing it right in front of you. 

“It is a gift for both of you. I know that Lucia would have been so thrilled to know how happy you have made our Javier. How happy you have made both of our lives. She would have loved you so dearly, hija, and would have wanted you to have these as you and Javier start your own family.” Tears welled behind Chucho’s eyes as you carefully took the package in your hands, resting it between you and Javi as the both of you gently ripping away the wrapping paper and bow to reveal what was inside Chucho’s gift. You held a small, leather bound book between you two, Chucho gesturing to have you open it to see what was inside. As you flipped back the cover, you revealed the first page, a picture of a young Lucia in the very same kitchen the 3 of you found yourself in, smiling at the camera as she stirred a pot of something on the stove, apron tied around her waist. Below the photo were bold, shaky cursive letters, reading “Lucia’s Recipes.” 

“Pops…” Javi whispered in shock, delicately touching the page, gazing up at his dad.  

“Your mamá would have wanted you to have all of them. She always told me that she couldn’t wait for the day she could have a daughter to share all of her cooking secrets with. She would have been even more excited to share them with you Mija, knowing the wonderful woman that you are.” 

Carefully turning the page, you could feel your lip quiver as you looked at Chucho, feeling how watery your eyes were now becoming. “Chucho, this is- I don’t- thank you, Chucho. This is so special. I’m honored you want them to share them, I- I know how important these are to your family.” 

“You are family, hija.” Handing the book off to Javi, you pushed up out of your chair, making your way over to Chucho to wrap him in a tight hug, Chucho quickly reciprocating, squeezing you back.   

“Thank you, Chucho.” You whispered into his shoulder, trying your best to keep from sobbing as Javi pushed out of his chair, joining the both of you in a group hug, holding the two people he loved most in the world in his broad grasp. 

“Thanks, Pops.” 

“Los amo a los dos (I love you both).” Chucho sniffed, pulling away to wipe away the tears streaming down his cheeks. “Now, let’s eat this pozole, I can hear Lucia yelling at me for letting it start to go cold.” 

The 3 of you spent the rest of your night full of pozole, Javi finishing off at least 3 bowls as you talked at the kitchen table, sharing stories of your favorite holiday traditions and memories. Chucho broke out at least 4 different photo albums to share photos of Christmases past, filled with lots of ones of an adorable Javi and his bright, toothy grin as he opened up presents. Chucho was thrilled with the present you and Javi had gotten for him- a new work jacket for out on the ranch, Javi noting that he probably was still wearing the same jacket he did when Javi was first born. 

You and Javi had insisted that you let Chucho help you clean up around the kitchen after making you dinner, practically having to force him to sit down in his chair to relax while the two of you got to work collecting and cleaning dishes in the sink. You got to work washing as Javi dried, taking time to turn on the radio in the kitchen, raising the volume as he tuned in to the local station that had been playing nothing but Christmas music for the past week. “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas”  began playing from the speakers, immediately beginning to sing along, swaying your hips, scrubbing the last of the pots and pans. Javi snuck up behind you, snaking his hands around your waist, placing a soft kiss on your shoulder as his chest pressed against your back. 

“Dance with me.” He whispered, placing his hands on your hips to spin you around, making you giggle as your sponge splashed in the sink, playfully drying your wet hands against his flannel before interlacing one of your hands with his, the other one resting on his shoulder as he wrapped his free hand around the small of your back. The two of you gently swayed in the dim light of the kitchen, the soft sounds of Frank Sinatra’s voice humming in the background. 

Here we are as in olden days, happy golden days of yore. Faithful friends who are dear to us, gather near to us once more. 

As the sweet and syrupy melody of the song played on, Javi held up his hand, prompting you to spin under his outstretched arm before pulling you back in, resting his hand on your back, the other holding your face as he dipped you down, his lips curled in a tender grin against yours as he leaned in to kiss you. 

Through the years, we all will be together, if the fates allow. Hang a shining star upon the highest bough. And have yourself a merry little Christmas now.

“I love you, Osita.” 

“I love you more, you dork.” 

You rested your head on his chest, smiling into the worn fabric of his button up, soaking up the sweet simplicity of the moment- how right then and there, it felt like there was no one in the world but the two of you, slow dancing in Chucho’s kitchen, arms wrapped tight around the man you loved. It felt like holding everything you’d ever need. Everything you’d ever want.  It felt like holding your home. 

 If there was one thing you were not, it was patient, especially when it came to waiting. You never had been, and at this point in your life, you were very much convinced you never would be. Ever since you could remember, you were always the first one up in your house on Christmas, frantically waking up your parents and brothers to let them know presents were stacked under the tree at an ungodly hour, forcing your parents to implement the “If you don’t stay in your bed until 6 A.M. you won’t get any of your presents” rule to try and save some ounce of their sanity for the chaos that ensued after the 4 of you were really wide awake. Even as an adult, you couldn’t help but wake up giddy on Christmas, feeling as bright eyed and bushy tailed as you did all those years ago as a kid. While Javi was very aware of your love for Christmas, he wasn’t aware of the fact that it meant that you would be wide awake, waiting for him to wake up this early in the morning. 

“Merry Christmas!” You squealed, trying your best to contain your excitement as you watched Javi finally begin to stir, his sleepy curls peeking out from under the covers, eyes squinting and blinking heavily as he let out a big yawn, draping his arm over your waist, half awake. 

“Good morning.” He grumbled, rubbing his hand over his face, practically still asleep.  “What time is it?” 

“6:45…” You replied, grimacing sheepishly, wincing at the early hours plastered on your alarm clock. “You can go back to sleep if you want to, sorry if I woke you up.” 

“6:45? Jesus, how long have you already been up for, Osita?” He sighed, propping himself up on his elbows, running his hands through the messy ends of his hair. 

“Not that long…” You muttered, looking away from him, hoping it would deter him interrogating further. Javi said nothing- he only cocked his head to the side and stared with that look he gave you when he knew you were hiding something, knowing damn well his tired, puppy dog eyes would pull the truth out of you. “Fine…” You huffed, turning back to him. “I’ve been up since 6.” 

“6 in the morning? Jesus Christ, hermosa.” Javi laughed to himself, shaking his head as he wrapped his arm around you, pulling you to lay against his bare chest. “I guess I can’t say I’m surprised. What the hell have you been doing since you got up?” 

“I made coffee, took a giant shit after I drank the coffee, turned on the lights to the Christmas tree, put Christmas music on in the living room, and then I came back to bed and I’ve been trying to read while I was waiting for you to wake up.” 

Javi could do nothing but let out an amused sigh as he pressed a long kiss into the top of your head. “You’re insane, you know that?” 

“You’re the one who proposed.” You sassed back, holding your ring in Javi’s face, a playful smirk growing across your face before giving him a little poke on his chest. His response to your witty remark was grabbing you by the waist, flipping you on top of him as he tickled your sides, pecking quick kisses along your body, making you flail and squirm as you erupted with giggles. “Let go, pendejo! You’re gonna end up with a black eye for Christmas if you don’t stop!” 

“I’d like to see you try.” He grinned, releasing you from his grasp, giving you a little shove. “Alright, well I’m fucking awake now.” Reaching his arms over his head, Javi let out another loud yawn. 

“I made you coffee.” You shrugged, trying to provide at least a little peace offering to him for your early morning wake up. 

“I’d fucking hope so.” The two of you laughed as you shuffled out of bed, Javi lazily throwing on a t-shirt and pajama pants before you both wandered out of the bedroom, you at a much quicker pace than Javi. 

As much as Javi wanted to give you a hard time about your over exaggerated enthusiasm this early in the morning, he couldn’t help but feel his heart flutter as he walked into the living room, seeing you sit curled up on the couch, clutching a mug of coffee, beaming at Javi as Christmas music played softly in the background, the walls dimly lit by the twinkling lights of tree, being hit with the realization that every Christmas for the rest of his life, would be a Christmas spent with you. 

“For you.” You smiled, holding out Javi’s mug, steam dancing off the top of the bitter brown liquid. “My family always opened presents before we did anything else, but if you have something else that your family always did, or you don’t want to, we can-” 

“Osita, I know you wanna open presents first, it’s okay.” Javi snickered, kissing your forehead before you shot up off the couch, running over to the tree to grab one of the several neatly wrapped boxes stacked beneath it. 

“Okay, thank God, I think I would have spontaneously combusted if I had to wait any longer to give you your gifts.” Hurrying back over to the couch, you placed your boxes on Javi’s lap, snuggling back up next to him as he began to tear away at the wrapping paper of the smallest package. 

“You don’t have any photos on your desk, so I figured I’d get you one. That way you can stare at my ugly mug all day long.” You joked, nodding toward the picture frame Javi was holding with a picture from your cousin’s wedding a few months back. 

“Shut up. Thank you, I do need more pictures of us in my office, and you look so hot in this picture.” He smirked, giving you a little nudge before picking up the next gift in your pile. “Thank you, Osita.” 

“Says the one who’s in the fucking tuxedo in that photo.” You rolled your eyes, watching Javi shake the wrapping paper off the next box. 

“Fuck, I’ve been needing new boots. Thank you, Osita, these are so nice.” Javi grinned, holding up the dark leather shoes, letting the bottom of the box drop to the floor. 

“I know you have, and you refuse to buy yourself new ones, so I figured I’d upgrade them for you.” You crossed your arms over your chest at Javi, wondering how he’d ever convince himself that he wasn’t just as stubborn as you. 

“Jesus, this is heavy.” He laughed, working away at the wrapping to reveal a plain, cardboard box, giving you a confused look. 

“It didn’t come in a box and I couldn’t wrap it how it was. I promise you your first gift isn’t a heavy cardboard box.” The two of you laughed as Javi tore the tape holding the top together, digging through the tissue paper, eyes going wide at the contents of the box. 

“Osita…” He warned, pulling out the bottle of his favorite Texas branded whisky he would only order for himself on nice occasions, knowing 1- how hard it was to find, and 2- that it was not cheap. 

“Don’t even try to start with me. It’s Christmas and I love you and you deserve all the nicest things in the world. I know how much you love this stuff, even though it tastes like pure gasoline, and that you would never buy it for yourself.” You smirked, grabbing under his chin, squeezing his cheeks. 

“Thank you, Osita. Where the hell did you find this stuff?” Javi looked at the bottle in disbelief, examining it before setting it carefully back on the ground. 

“Steve knew a guy.” You shrugged, only pausing for a moment before pushing yourself off the cushions, only to be stopped by Javi’s grasp around your wrist, pulling you back down. 

“These are all perfect, baby. Thank you so much. You're too good tot me. My turn.” Javi grinned, grunting as he got up off the couch, looking through the boxes to find the one he wanted, snatching it up and handing it over to you, immediately beginning to shed the box of its paper. “If you don’t- if you don’t like it or don’t want it, that’s okay, but I figured-” 

“Javi, I’m sure whatever it is, I’ll love it.” Taking a pause from your unwrapping, you reached over to give Javi’s knee a squeeze, smiling at him before shuffling the lid off the top of the long box. “Oh no way! Are you serious?!” You squealed, holding up the emerald green and black Dallas Stars hockey jersey. “Javi, what the fuck, this is so cool! Thank you!” You dropped the jersey in your lap, leaning over to give him a tight hug. 

“Thank god, I was worried you were gonna be pissed it wasn’t a Blackhawks jersey, but I think you already have 2 here, and like 3 more at your parents house, so I figured, you might like one for the Stars, too.” Javi sighed, relieved that his gift wasn’t about to stir up any unwanted hockey tensions. 

“I will wear it every game, except for when we play the Blackhawks- Then I will bury it deep in the closet.” You giggled, picking it back up to stare at it, oblivious to the fact that Javi had already gotten up again to get you another gift.

“These two go together.” He smiled, handing you over the much smaller box as you tilted your head in confusion. You quickly unwrapped the second box, a smaller version of the box for your jersey you had just opened. Still unsure of how something so tiny could go with your new jersey, you suspiciously lifted up the lid, your jaw dropping as you saw what was inside. “Holy fuck, Javi, are you serious?!” You gasped, pulling two tickets to the Dallas Stars vs. Chicago Blackhawks game, clutching them like you couldn’t believe they were real. Taking a second to actually read the ticket, your mouth gaped even further. “Jav, holy shit, these seats are-” 

“Against the glass.” Javi smirked, watching your eyes dart back and forth between the tickets and his smug grin. 

“But what about- how are we, wait- wouldn’t we have to-“ you mumbled to yourself, trying to process the gift while figuring out the logistics of getting to and from a night game in Dallas from Laredo. 

“I’ve got it all taken care of. The game is on Friday in February, the other 3rd grade teachers said they would do whatever to help you take that Friday off, our flight leaves at 2, we land in Dallas at 3:30, and I have a hotel booked for Friday and Saturday. Figured we could make a weekend of it.” 

“Javi- You can’t- Javi this is too much- baby, are you serious?” You whispered, breath shaky as you looked up at his beaming face, leaning in to kiss you. 

“I can, and I will. You deserve it. Merry Christmas, Osita. There’s one more thing.” He smirked, raising an eyebrow at you, grabbing one last present from under the tree and setting it in your lap. 

“Javier Peña, you do not need to get me anything else, I swear to God-” You protested, giving Javi a stern look as you stared at the present in your lap. 

“It’s not anything big, I saw it when I got the jersey and couldn’t help myself. Just open it, please?” He sighed, picking it up and bringing it even closer to you. 

“Okay, okay.” You shook your head, quickly tearing away the wrapping paper to reveal the box underneath. Lifting the lid, you dramatically rolled your eyes at Javi as you lifted up the red, lacy, lingerie that was tucked away in the tissue paper it had been delicately folded under. “This looks a lot more like a gift for you than a gift for me, Mr. Peña.” You laughed, giving Javi a playful nudge. 

“Well, if you put it on and let me unwrap you like the pretty little present you are, I’m sure I can find a way to make it a gift for the both of us.” Javi rasped, leaning over to nip at the exposed skin of your neck, making you let out a breathy moan, before coming to your senses, immediately darting up off the couch towards your bedroom. 

“Where the hell are you going?” Javi asked, laughing at you as you sped off, lingerie in your hands. 

“Changing so you can unwrap your last present!” You winked, wiggling the lacy outfit in the air before ducking into the bedroom. “Hey!” You shouted, your voice slightly muffled from behind the bedroom door, creaking it open to pop your head back out. 

“What, hermosa?” Javi laughed, awestruck smile glowing across his face as he stared at you. 

“I love you, Javier Peña. Merry Christmas.” 

“Merry Christmas, Osita. I love you more.”

Taglist: @cool-iguana @rhoorl @whyjuliaaa @bbiophiliaa @pertinentpostmortem @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @pedrobaby @fatima-marisa @beboldbebravethings @poodlebae @kittenlittle24 @3sriracha @jungchloee @perennialdoll247 @prettyinpunk85 @partyofone3413 @harriedandharassed @pedrohoe04 @theorganasolo @endlessthxxghts @blackfemalenerd @deppydelta @beware-my-thorns

[chaoticstrata]

WIP (?) Gamer AU

Theron moved his character out of the way of a ground AOE while maintaining his rotation--thank the Stars for being melee. His party mates did the same, except for their black mage, who used their teleport at the last second to maximize their DPS in their runic circle. He rolled his eyes as they cursed over the comms when they got clipped by snapshot damage.

“You should have moved sooner,” one of their healers chastised as they placed a restoration spell on the mage.

“I was casting!” the black mage argued.

“Ok, and how much casting are you going to do tanking the floor?” the healer quipped back.

“Why you…”

“Clear the comms, you two,” the other healer and co-raid leader said, his pleasant, gravelly voice commanding and cutting off any further argument. 

Theron couldn’t help but grin at that. He loved how Oram--the co-leader’s character name--took charge of situations like this, nipping them in the bud before they got worse. Not to mention, he loved hearing the other man’s voice; it was the first thing that attracted Theron to him--among other things. He’d never tell the other man that, of course--Void knows he was already awkward enough around the healer as it was. 

The next mechanic started, as did the next call-out. “Tank buster, collapse.”

Thankfully, the rest of the raid went uneventful--save for their one melee flipping backward off the platform…again. Theron could hear Lana sigh at that from the other desk in their designated gaming room. It reminded him how great it was to have a roommate who also gamed and raided with him--no need to keep super quiet during intense fights.

“Good job, everyone,” she said, as she distributed loot as the raid leader. “We’ll start on the next boss next week, so be sure to do your homework.”

“Yes, mom,” their bard said, knowing full well the other woman hated it when anyone called her that. 

Theron snickered, which earned him a ball of paper being thrown at his head. Lana growled at them both before saying in comms. “Don’t worry about pots and food; Lyrei and Kairos have ‘volunteered’ to handle getting that for us.”

“Rude!” Lyrei growled; all of them could practically hear the bard pouting over the comms.

“Hey now,” Theron whined. “How did I get pulled into this?”

“Because I can hear you snickering even without the comms,” she said, looking over at him for good measure. Lana smirked and added on, not on comms, “Besides, you’ll be thanking me in a moment.”

Theron raised an eyebrow and was about to ask when a familiar chuckle rang out over the voice chat.

“Will you be farming the mats tonight, Kai?” Oram asked, causing the rest of the channel to go quiet--fucking snoopy gossips. At this point, most knew about Theron’s crush on the other man--how Oram didn’t know was beyond him.

Theron could already feel Lana’s smug gaze at the back of his head as his cheeks flushed. “Uh, yeah, probably. I don’t have work tomorrow, so I can finish most of it tonight.”

“Same here. Would you like company?” the healer asked. “I don’t mind helping out with getting the materials you need.”

“You’re welcome,” Lana said in her irritatingly smug tone of voice.  She then said over comms, “I’m going to head out for the evening. The rest of you have a good night.”

“Same,” the bard said, suddenly cheery again, followed by the rest of the group. With the rest of the group gone, it was just the two of them alone.

--------------------------

I really don't need more WIP things. ;-; Not sure if I'm going to go anywhere with this, but it was nice to write some of it out.

[openly-journaling]

Smidge: 2/19/2024

So we got a counseling appointment Wednesday morning. I'd like to stop dissociating so much, it's not like our body says we're going to switch out any time soon by the feel of it. Still front stuck with Marshmallow. though I did feel Dizzy's presence a bit earlier and Andrew's. They were more co-conscious. The headache has disappeared at least, so there's that. Homework is due tomorrow and I.. still haven't started.

I'm in a FAR better mood than yesterday and the day before, so I SHOULD be able to get it done. I hope. Why am I so paralyzed by all of this. Marshmallow would step in but he can't seem to take over any control over the body right now. It's like he's just here to keep me company. I want to talk to my brother again and know how he's doing.

I want to see Sorrow and I hope he's doing well without me also. But I just feel so stuck here. It's so funny Marshmallow is a gatekeeper but sometimes it just doesn't fucking work for him either. His ability to control who fronts is limited to when and only when we aren't locked like this.

I don't feel miserable but I feel miserable. Not like "it's the end of the world, kill me, I need to quit school" miserable. But just.. "I wish I could just do it" miserable. I'm so tired. Mentally over this issue. Like everywhere else right now I'm fine for the most part. Minor anxieties. I think knowing we still have at least a 90% in both classes helps. So if we fall back a little bit it won't damage things too much. But that doesn't mean that just because we can, we should.

I don't remember if I talked about this in the last post. I don't recall doing it, but being late, behind all of that has brought back memories of high school. Knowing we'd never be good enough for anyone back then. That's why we dropped math class. It wasn't like the math was hard, we were just so behind at that point in just trying to reach the homework that it stressed us out too much.

Maybe as a solution we could have just gone to the school to log in and reach our stuff and then print it off in the library. We just didn't. We were still so far behind. I'm just so glad our math teacher was beyond understanding and even gave us another option. Though I don't think she fully realized the option she gave us (part of it being online and part of it being in person) is where the struggle is well.. the struggle. We dropped the class mostly because we couldn't keep up because we couldn't even access the homework. Ugh.

But that's okay. There's always another opportunity to do it but I think we should just do math by itself when the opportunity presents itself. After we finish all the other basics, like Biology, Psychology and Interpersonal Communications. I'm sure there may be a few other fields as well but I think those are the main four we need to do for general studies first?

Anyway. Since dropping math class the memories of high school haven't been as prominent. But now we're having this sudden executive dysfunction issue and now.. but I don't fully recall if the lack of doing our homework then was a result of that or a result of the stress of foster care. It could be both or either one. We just can't let this happen again. We cannot. Not for this. Back when we were a child/teenager what matter did it make to us.

There was no dopamine in any of it. ADHD doesn't care about grades and papers and homework. ADHD cares about fun. But now I can't even have fun, just stressed by this idea we'll fall behind again. Why am I front stuck? Why? Can the body just let me switch now? Why do I have to deal with all this life stuff, I'm just a silly woodland boy. I prefer relaxation and comfort with people I care about, not all this stressful stuff.

Marshmallow consistently whispering in my ear that it's okay, it'll be alright. No it won't. It never has been and it never will be. Saying everything will turn out right has actually made things worse before.

[mirkosintern]

Crawlin’ back to you

pairing: dabi x fem!reader

genre: smut with a lil angst and fluff if you squint

notes: reader is a member of the lov, set in the meta liberation army arc (before the war!), possessive dabi, wowee this is my first work!! I never expected myself to be able to write a piece but here we are ehehe this was inspired by a certain tiktok actually. U may have already noticed but the title is from the song do I wanna know? by the arctic monkeys<3

warnings: 18+, unprotected sex, breeding, cum play, dubcon-ish?, toxic relationship, degradation, vulgar language, alcohol

word count: 3k

⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

That the nights were mainly made for saying things that you can't say tomorrow day Crawlin’ back to you Ever thought of callin’ when you've had a few? 'Cause I always do Maybe I'm too busy bein’ yours to fall for somebody new Now I've thought it through

⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

Dabi wasn’t one to do feelings. He’s screwed numerous women, but they were nothing more than some toys to fulfill his sexual needs. Neither did he want to have feelings, nor did he need to. Afterall, his side hoes who begged to stay with him even after all the degradation he’s given them disgusted him the most. He would snicker at their pathetic attempts and cut them off ruthlessly.

However, you were an only exception.

No, he did not have feelings for you, he swears he never did and never will. But you were different from his other disposable sluts--he kept you around. He didn’t ghost you, instead, he kept coming back. It is only because you’re a member of the lov as well, he thinks. You are easy to access since you’re always around the lov base, and he doesn’t even have to worry about getting caught by civilians or stupid bitches who suddenly decide to turn him into the police. You guys were practically co-workers with benefits, fuck buddies where the “buddies” part is questionable.

Dabi didn’t mind that he made an exception for you until that night. That very night where you sleepily decided to crawl into his arms after a rough round and whispered him how you loved the rough texture of his skin against yours. That very night where you pressed delicate kisses beneath his jaw. The moment of intimacy—making his heart pound and warmth spread beneath his cold skin—was threatening. You were threatening.

That’s where he cut you off completely. He did not knock on your bedroom door located in the lov base anymore. He stopped sending those “you up?” texts at 3am. He didn’t even lock eyes with you or talk to you anymore.

It feels as if something heavy dropped inside you, squashing your heart to the point where it’s painful. You try your best to ignore the pang in your chest and remind yourself that you guys were nothing more than co-workers with benefits. However, the enduring heartburn only functions to make you realize how attached you were to him. He’s Dabi, the biggest scumbag you will ever meet, what did you expect? What were you thinking? It should be no surprise this happened, right? But having to encounter his stupidly handsome face every day was not doing any help. You are a girl with dignity, you tell yourself, trying your best to ignore his strong scent of campfire and cologne drowning you every time you guys are in the same room.

The pain is suffocating you for weeks, and you finally decide to completely get over him. The night Dabi brings a bimbo to his room and fucks her loud enough for everyone in the lov to hear—for you to hear—you’re done with everything. You step outside, get drunk, do anything to numbify the pain the raven-haired guy has caused you, and even meet a nice-looking guy who seems to be interested in you.

You are doing good without Dabi.

You don’t need Dabi anymore.

You are not letting him get to your head.

 ⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

A party.

League of villains is all about privacy, but they also started having some fun after uniting with the meta liberation army. Now they had sufficient money, people and place to throw parties every now and then without the danger of getting caught by civilians. Afterall, a number of heroes were in their side as well.

“Not gonna lie, you guys do know how to host parties.” Keigo smirks, picking up a glass of bourbon whiskey. “It’s fuckin’ lame,” Dabi answers as he downs a glass of liquor.

“So, what happened with y/n?” Keigo throws a suggestive smile.

“The hell you mean what happened with her?” Dabi frowns.

“Y’know, didn’t you guys used to be a thing or something?”

“Nah, she was an occasional fuck and that’s it.”

“Oh really? The Dabi I know never fucks a same bitch twice though. I thought she was something special.”

“Special?”

“Yeah, thought maybe you actually wanted her.”

A smug grin appears on Dabi’s face. “Never even liked her.”

“Have you seen her and her new boyfriend?”

The smile is quick to vanish from his face after hearing the word boyfriend. Dabi’s eyes widen, immediately glaring at Keigo. Before he could say anything, Keigo tilts his chin to point something.

“There they are.”

Dabi turns his head only to find you clinging onto some guy’s arm. Your cheeks are flushed –a pretty, pink glow on your face—as you bat your eyelashes at the guy. Bubbly giggles escape from your lips while you stare at him through half-lidded eyes. The guy’s arm is secured around your waists, pulling you closer to him.

Dabi sees red.

His entire body freezes as his grip around the liquor glass tighten. Dabi doesn’t say anything for a moment, but there is no way Keigo wouldn’t pick up how his cerulean eyes are flaming at the sight. “Well, I thought you knew.” Keigo pats Dabi’s shoulder. “Wouldn’t matter anyways right? You never liked her.”

“…Right.” Dabi takes another sip from the liquor, his eyes still fixed to you.

Keigo’s words are true; at least they are supposed to be true. Dabi didn’t have feelings for you. He doesn’t do romance. No feelings were ever involved with any of the women he’s slept with, and he made sure of it. It was so clear for Dabi without a question.

But why is it unable for him to erase the sight of you with some guy as he forces himself to sleep that night? Why are your sweet giggles echoing his head? Why can’t he get rid of the thought of you in that tight, black dress that perfectly complements the curves of your body? Why is the moment where the guy places his hand on your inner thigh replaying in his head? Why are thoughts of you messing with his mind?

“Fucking hell.”

Dabi gets up. This was fucking annoying. You were truly fucking annoying.

 ⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅∙∘☽༓☾∘∙•⋅⋅⋅•⋅⋅⊰⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅⋅•⋅

You tilt your head to check the glowing digits of your digital clock on the nightstand. 2:15am. It’s late, and you haven’t even taken off the dress you wore to the party. You are too tired both physically and emotionally. You’ve done quite a decent job in entertaining the man who’s accompanied you through the whole party, but it was truly an energy-consuming task. You and him walked around as if you guys were the happiest couple in the party; but the truth is that you guys aren’t even properly dating yet. Solely because you have constantly been refusing to properly answer him asking you to be his girlfriend. It’s not that he’s bad looking or anything, but the idea of being with him just doesn’t sit right with you. Ever since you’ve met him, he couldn’t keep his hands off you without asking you anything about consent. You always had to pull his hand away with an uncomfortable smile, yet he never took a hint. However, when a dating rumor about you and him started and spread quickly, you didn’t try to correct anything. Maybe it was because you wanted to pull out a reaction from a certain villain. Maybe your unusual actions at today’s party; clinging onto the guy and laughing at every single word he spoke; was to make Dabi witness how happy you were.

 Truthfully, you were dying inside.

 What was even worse was that none of your attempts seemed to bring an ounce of reaction from Dabi. When have you become so pathetic and desperate? You feel tears welling up in your eyes, hot and burning, but you don’t want to cry. Not for an asshole like him. You take out your phone, find the guy’s name, and text him that you don’t want to see him anymore. You feel a little guilty, thinking that you may have used him to provoke something from Dabi, but your thoughts are too worn out for you to comprehend anything. You flop onto your bed and bury your face in your pillow. You huff out a deep sigh, and the soft texture of your cotton pillow feels warm on your cheeks. In all honesty, you were thinking about Dabi the whole time you were at the party. Whenever the guy’s hand creeped up your thighs or gripped on your ass, you imagined it was Dabi’s, trying your hardest to feel something from the contact.

 You weren’t over Dabi. You never were. Realization hurts, leaving a sour feeling in your mouth.

 Your body shoots up at the sudden, loud slamming sound emerged from your door. Your teary eyes widen at the lean man slamming the door shut. “Dabi?” You ask, not believing your eyes. “What the hell are you doing here?” Without an answer, Dabi’s one hand reaches for your throat as his other hand grips your wrist. His large body is towering over you, and you feel your bed shift as he dips one knee in the mattress. His sapphire eyes pierce through your soul, and you can feel his raging anger just from looking at him.

“You’re such a pain in the ass, y’know that?”

“Dabi, what are you-“

He doesn’t let you finish the sentence, pulling you in for a heated kiss. Your lips open reflexively, enabling him to deepen the kiss. The kiss is aggressive, and he doesn’t know whether it is because of his anger or his pent-up desires towards you that he has been suppressing. The kiss gets sloppier over time, hot and wet with saliva and tongue. He lets go of the grip on your wrist and starts tracing your inner thigh with his thumb, and you let out a soft moan. You finally pull away from the kiss to catch your breath, but he doesn’t cease to caress your thigh. Instead, he lowers himself to your ear. “You seem to really love thigh touches, don’t you?” His low voice and hot breath brushing the shell of your ear sends chills down your spine.

“Huh?”

“I always knew you were a slut, but never knew you were this much of a whore. You would bend over any guy who offers you some touches, right?”

Tears swell in your eyes again at his vile words, but it’s hard to talk when his knuckles are repeatedly brushing your clit.

“I’m… not a slut…nngh.” Suppressed moans escape your lips.

“Yeah? Why are you making those sounds then?”

“Dabi…”

He yanks your dress up and dips two fingers inside your lace panties, making you let out a weak yelp. Dabi raises his brows with a smug grin on his face.

“Oh, so she indeed is a slut huh? You get this fucking wet from a kiss?”

His two digits start pumping inside you, and you grip on his white shirt at the sudden sensation. Your gasps and moans get louder, and you suddenly feel his wet lips against your neck. Dabi sucks hard, making sure to leave dark purple marks from your jaw to your neck and shoulder, as he repeats the step of curling his fingers and pulling them inside and out your hole. “Dabi…too fast.” You whine out. “Yeah?” A sadistic grin appears on Dabi’s face. “Be a good slut and take what I give you.” His thumb reaches for your clit, making your legs shiver.

“Nngh…stop, I’m gonna… Dabi I’m gonna cum.”

“Stop? You want me to stop?”

“No!”

“Do you deserve it though?” he slows his pace while teasing your clit. “Beg.”

It’s humiliating, really—but do you have any other choice when you are this close?

“Please, Dabi… I’ll be your good slut. Please let me cum!” Your desperate cries have him pumping his fingers fast again, and soon you’re seeing white. Hot drops of release coat Dabi’s fingers as he pulls out.

“Say ah.”

“A-ah.”

You obey, and Dabi sticks his digits inside your mouth. Your mouth wraps around them immediately, sucking as if it’s a pacifier. “Good girl,” Dabi says as he pats your head, and it makes your stomach swoop with sick pride.

The bulge in his pants is becoming painful, and he contemplates on fucking your mouth. But he’s too impatient; He feels the need to abuse your cunt right now. He wants to hear your screams and cries as he proves who you belong to.

“Take that off.” Dabi gestures at your dress, and you start undressing as he demands. Dabi pulls down his sweatpants and boxers, causing his cock to spring out. It’s so pretty, you think, and you can’t help but admire his red tip, glistening with precum. He pumps his length a few times and lines it up with your entrance. You inhale a sharp gasp as you feel his whole length inside you. It feels so full; it feels as if he’s gonna split you in half if he starts moving.

“Ah, too big.”

“I know.” Dabi looks down on you. “Take it like a little slut you are.”

Before you could even talk back, he is moving inside you. Your moans blend with the noise of the bed creaking; a perfectly harmonized orchestra to Dabi’s ears.

You knew Dabi wasn’t one to prep you or go slow, but you feel like he’s going way rougher than usual. His wild thrusts have your head lolling backwards, and Dabi does not miss the chance to take a hard bite on your neck. You scream out of both pain and pleasure, and you feel two hot streams of tears on your flushed cheeks.

“Aww, she’s crying.” Dabi says in a mocking tone. “Bet you love the pain.”

Humiliation fills your chest and you turn your head away, but Dabi quickly grabs your chin with one hand, forcing you to directly face him.

“Who’s the one making you feel this full?” he asks.

“Y-you.”

“Did he ever make you feel this way?”

Wait, he? Who does he mean by he? Your alleged boyfriend? Could it be possible that Dabi was doing this out of jealousy? You try to comprehend, but it’s impossible for you to think clearly, not when Dabi is fucking you stupid. “No!” You shout.

Dabi’s free hand reaches for your clit and starts rubbing circles. “Tell me, who does this pussy belong to?”

“You…” You try to answer, but he suddenly lifts up your lower body and slams into your cervix in the right angle. It has you moaning even louder, your insides spasming around his cock.

“I can’t hear you.” He smirks sadistically.

“You, Dabi, it belongs to you! I belong to you!” You’re screaming his name like it’s the only word you know, making his cock twitch. “That’s right. You are all for me, all for me to use. Just a pathetic little slut for my cock.” A satisfactory grin appears on Dabi’s face.

Dabi lowers his body down and grunts directly into your ear as he thrusts even faster. The sound of his skin slamming into yours is so erotic, and you can feel how close you are.

“You wanna cum huh?” His words have you nodding frantically, babbling incoherent words. Yes Dabi—wanna cum so bad—wanna be yours—wanna be your good girl—please, dabi.

“Then do it. Make a mess on my cock.”

“Nngh, Dabi!” You scream out his name as euphoria washes down your body. His release follows you soon enough, painting your walls white. You feel warmth filling your belly while his groans echo in your ear. You’re still sobbing and panting after he pulls out, without any energy left to move. As your blurry vision starts getting clearer, you feel his warm skin and the sting of his cold staples against your back. His long arms wrap around your oversensitive body, pulling you closer to him.

“You’re messing with my head.” Dabi rests his forehead on the back of your shoulder.

“Huh?”

You’re confused, but Dabi doesn’t elaborate. His ego doesn’t let him do such thing.

“When you said you belonged to me, did you mean it?”

You bite your lower lip, not knowing how to respond to his sudden question. Millions of unspoken words and feelings are hanging in the back of your throat, creating a huge lump. You swallow them all and spit out a question instead. “Do you want me to belong to you?”

“Yeah.” Your eyes widen at his unexpected response, butterflies fluttering inside your chest. “Be mine.” His low voice vibrates against your soft skin. Your heart melts at his words, and you cannot stop your feelings from overspilling anymore. At that moment you both realize; you and Dabi were meant to crawl back to each other, no matter how hard you both try and struggle.

“I’m yours.” You smile, “I’m all yours.”

[walled-flwr]

NATIONAL CITY DREAMS

[15 years into a Supercorp future... Kara and Lena are married with two children, 14 year-old daughter Athena Danvers - Luthor, and 10-year-old son, Leo Danvers - Luthor. Kara is still National City's hero and is head of Cat Co., Lena runs L Corp and is the most successful woman on the hemisphere. The kids are growing up, but there are some challenges to raising a Supercorp family]

LENA

I'm running late again. Damn it! I type furiously on my pad, keeping a surreptitious eye on the digital clock. I can't miss dinner for the fourth time this week. I know Kara says she understands (and she is the most understanding wife a woman could have), but I don't want this to become a pattern. Athena just shrugs - she's too cool for words and emotions - and goes back to her computer. Leo - my sweet baby boy - I can feel his heart break every time I cancel.

Edge International has been dodgy, what else would I expect? My phone rings, once, twice. I try to ignore it and focus on work so I can close this chapter for today, but it's my personal line. It could be Kara checking in. I pause in my work and look at the Caller ID.

Headmaster Sheffield, St. Genevieve's Prep.

I frown. Why is the kids' principal calling me? Has something happened to Athena or Leo? Hurriedly, I hit answer and put the phone to my ear.

"Headmaster Sheffield," I say, trying to keep my voice level. "Is something wrong? Has anything happened to Athena and Leo?"

Sheffield clears his throat. When he speaks, it's measured and cool. "In a manner of speaking, Mrs. Danvers Luthor."

I wait impatient him for him to get to it.

"Athena and Leo have been in an altercation."

My eyes widen and I groan. Not this again, I think. Athena has been having problems at school, and sometimes, she lashes out. This is a first for Leo, however.

I clear my own throat. "Altercation? I'll need you to be more specific."

"She punched a girl in the face. Miss. Somers needed medical attention for her bloody nose."

"And you're sure that this was Athena's fault?" I ask, immediately defensive.

"Mrs. Danvers Luthor, there were witnesses. Athena threw the first punch. You'll need to come and collect them both. They've been suspended for the rest of the week."

"What was Leo's role in all of this?" I pinch my temple, bracing for the worst.

"Apparently, he attacked a student who was trying to intervene, as well as using despicable language. We don't tolerate that here at St. Genevieve's Prep."

"Of course." I get to my feet, and snatch my handbag. This isn't how I envisioned the day going, but my children need me.

"Your wife has already been notified. I'd like to have the two of you in here tomorrow morning for a P.T.A conference to discuss Athena and Leo's future at our establishment." And with that, he hangs up.

I'm pensive on the drive across town to Athena and Leo's school. My first instinct is to be angry, disappointed. Being a Luthor means Living under a microscope. Kara and I sat Athena and Leo down as soon as they were old enough to understand. Because you're a Luthor, everyone automatically expects the worse from you. Hell, their uncle and grandmother are supervillains! Luthor's have to be careful, methodical, and most of all, cool. Brawling is unbecoming of Luthors. In the midst of my annoyance, I hear Kara's voice. She's gentle and understanding, and loving. Kara doesn't expect perfection, but humanity. She'd be upset, understandably, but she'd also listen to our children.

I channel my wife's positive as I drive into St. Genevieve's Prep. I spot Athena and Leo sitting under the statue. Athena, my beautiful girl, with her golden hair and thoughtful brown eyes. She is currently cradling Leo's dark head in her lap, and looking distastefully to where a group of girls have gathered to whisper.

Poor babies, I smile. But they're my babies,and I have to protect them. Leo spots me first and runs to hug me tightly. He buries his face in me and I squeeze him back. I love how he's never ashamed to show his affection, and I dread the day when he's grown up.

"Darling," I kiss the top of his head, and he looks up at me with those hazel eyes. "What have you been up to, little rabble rouser?"

Leo says in earnest, "I was protecting, Athena, Mom. That's what we do, right? We protect each other."

I smile, and kiss his forehead. "Of course, Sweet boy. We protect each other. Go on, in the car." Leo obeys, and I face Athena who's looking unsure. She looks so much like Kara, the angelic trusting face, but she's like me in so many other ways. It's not easy being a Luthor in high school, I know that from personal experience.

Athena lifts her chin as she comes to my front. "If you're going to tell at me, Mom, just get it over with."

I sigh and shake my head. "It's easier to yell and blame than to talk about how we're feeling."

Athena frowns. "OK, you're sounding like Mom."

"Good or bad?"

"I don't know..." Athens tucks a lock of her blond hair behind her ear and shuffles her feet. "I wasn't planning on hitting her, Mom. Ally was just saying all of these horrible things, dumb tabloid lies about you and... I just got so..."

"Angry?" I finish and she nods. "You're a Luthor. I know all about that game." I pull her in for a hug,and kiss the top of her head. "My beautiful, brave super girl," I say, and hear her sniffle. "You do your best not to make waves, but I'll never be angry with you for standing up for yourself. Ok?" Athena pulls back to look at me. Her green eyes are damp and she smiles. "What do you say to some Big Belly Burger? And all the ice cream we can gorge ourselves on?" My daughter grins and nods, before walking to the car.

I smile, feeling easier. There'll have to be a stern talk later, but for now, I just want to enjoy my children. My phone rings, this time it's Kara.

"Crisis Averted, Mrs Danvers Luthor," I say as I pick up. I hear Kara's laugh in the other end. "I knew I could count on you. What was it?"

"Long story short, our kids were doing what Luthors do best."

"Raising Hell?"

"While defending each other," I add. "I'm taking them out for some burgers and ice cream. Can you get away for some time?"

Kara groans in distress. "I had an impromptu session at the DEO. I can't get away."

"It's OK, Darling," I say, looking back at the car. Athena and Leo are joking around, and I smile. "I haven't had alone time with Athena and Leo in a while. I'll seize the opportunity."

"You're a great mom, Lena."

"I take inspiration from you," I smile. "I'm sorry I've been AWOL, Kara. You save the world, run Cat. Co and still make it in time for dinner and bath, I'm in awe of you."

"Kryptonian DNA."

"I love you, Kara."

"Not as much as I love you," she says, her voice lowering.

"Not possible," I murmur. "But, I'd like to show you just how much I appreciate and cherish you. What do you say to a weekend in Helsinki? Just the two of us?"

"Lena," Kara gasps, and I feel her brain working overtime. "But ..."

"Elizabeth hasn't seen Athena and Leo in months. I'm sure the kids will love some Midvale time. And what good is both of us being the heads of multinational corporations if we can't take some very much needed boss time off?"

"Lena, you're amazing. Yes."

"That's all I needed to hear," I grin. "I promise--"

I'm interrupted by the sound of a car horn. Leo is in the driver's seat looking very impatient.

"You owe two hungry kids some Big Belly Burger," Kara teases me. "Better get to it."

"See you at home?"

"Sure. I love you, Mrs Danvers Luthor."

"I love you, Mrs Danvers Luthor."

[guigz1-coldwar]

'Breaking point' : New chapter for "Redemption in a Spirit in a Cold War" is out !

Breaking point'

"My friends are my only family in this world but hurt them...and hell will be falling on you, I can guarantee you that !"

Chapter Summary : It's the moment for Yirina and the whole team to finally get moving on putting down Naga and save Adler from him but there's always something in an mission that don't go as planned.....

To read it on AO3, click here !

Words : +3900

------------------------------------------------------------------

Hearing of the tragic news about Mason's wife and me & Park were no longer feeling to celebrate anything at all for the remainder of the day, giving us an sad mood after Woods told us about what happened. After some minutes spent outside the hangar, trying to get our minds cleared, we decided to return inisde but instead of pretending that we were still good and go back with the others, still talking to each other, we preferred to actually go directly in the dorm, wanting mostly to have an sleep for tomorrow's big operation we are going to make and it will not be easy.

All night, I've been trying to juggle in my brain to search an little 'something' that could maybe help to know more about who was this Naga, also named Kapano Vang. I did heard that name in the first memory when I remembered of Stitch and just before I break his arm but I couldn't find anything else important about him. Was my encounter with him along Perseus was the only time I actually met him ? Or is there anything I'm missing right now ? Only other things I had is the intels the others find on him, nothing else.

Next morning, we took time to prepare ourselves as we planned to leave the base in the beginning of the afternoon to join Rivas. Like she said, she left in the middle of the night to make an recon of the sector the ground team are going to land and continue their path by walk to get to Naga's HQ while neutralizing the enemies that will be on our way as me & Garrett will try to make an better recon of the sector by using an Laotian Huey before joining the others in an specific spot to regroup and to think.

"Yirina !" An male voice came behind me as I was putting my equipment on me : holstler for my M1911 at my waist, some first-aid kits on my vest and my knife at my right boot. I turned around to discover Garrett, already prepared.

"Yes ?" I said, wondering what he wanted before he handed to me, multiples knifes.

"You might want to use some throwing knifes." He proposed to me and I nodded, taking the small knifes in my hand and putting them on my vest at an free space for them. "Oh and I have something else." He added before he got from his back, another knife that was kinda special.

"What's this ?" I asked him, seeing an red button on the knife side.

"You remember that raid we made at our first mission against Stone ?" He gestured with his free hand, pointing at me & him. "When I killed that guy with an knife that got out of its base ?" He continued, having in me the picture of that moment.

"Oh yeah, I got it : that's an ballistic knife." I exclaimed, putting my eyes on it, still in his hands. "Uhm...how does it work ?" I demanded as I wasn't so familiar with that thing

"Pretty simple, you either press the trigger, operating on the lever or switch on the handle." He explained, showing me the knife in detail before I took it in my hands. "Don't worry, I'm sure that you will use it well."

"We'll see that." I whispered, smiling at him as I strapped the ballistic knife at my belt. "Am I the only one who got that ?" I questioned him

"No, I gave one to Park and I didn't forget Song too." He replied, looking around as Park & Song were talking to each other and their looks were on us. "I can say that you got luck to be with Park, Yirina." He told me silently as I was still looking at Park with great eyes.

"Thanks." I smiled at him, blushing an little about talking about it to him. "Can say the same with you & Song."

"Thank you too." He did the same thing as me while I was quite impressed to see his gratitude towards me, he's an great friend. "Anyway, you're ready about our part ?" He asked me, mentioning the recon we will have later.

"Yes, just fearing that something will not go as planned." I expressed my doubts about it but it was very minimal to say.

"I know, there's always something that aren't going as planned in every mission." He exclaimed, taking an breath as he was looking outside towards the Huey we're going to use. "Trust me, things will go fine."

"I'm trusting you." I affirmed, putting my hand on his shoulder, thanking him to be an nice friend.

"Thanks again." He breathed before he look at my desk, seeing my guns. "I think it's time that we move on, looks like Woods is awaiting for us." He pointed outside, his eyes on Woods talking with Wolf next to the helicopter.

"Good, go there, I will be there in no-time." I grinned at him before he decide to collect his last piece of equipment on his own desk while I was taking in hands my guns, putting my M1911 in my holstler and taking my MP5 and then, I was on my way to join the others near the chopper, everyone was there...except Mason who already left the base last day.

"Looks like everyone is here." Woods spoke up, seeing me arrive near the group, holding his XM4 with his right hand.

"Any news of Rivas's team ?" Song asked to him directly.

"Last checkup with them was minutes ago, everything is all good on their side." Wolf replied, crossing his arms after he put his 'Death Machine' in the helicopter. "They're going to do one before we arrive near the LZ." He continued, his eyes on Song.

"Everyone has everything they need ?" Sims interjected, already settled at his place inside the helicopter. "Because we're not going to come back until we're done with Naga and saved Adler." He confirmed to us as our mission is going to be very long in the Laotian jungles.

"Well, we're going to make this quick then." Garrett scoffed, finally moving to get at his seat before the others start to join him.

"Woods, tell me that I ain't going to fly that thing again." I called Woods out about that before he shook his head.

"No, I'll be flying that thing first but when you & Garrett will be making that advanced recon in it, it will be the co-pilot that will take the commands." He reassured me, putting his hand on my shoulder, it was true that putting me in controls last day did almost freak me out. "Before we go, I need to know something." He added, taking me apart an few meters from the helicopter, his hand still on me. "No one is aware for Mason's true departure ?" He demanded.

"No, me & Park didn't tell anything." I replied, sure of my words as only Sims & Wolf got worried about it but of course, we hold our promises to Woods & we lied to them. "Don't worry, Woods, we'll tell nothing." I continued, nodding to him.

"Thanks." He breathed, removing his hands off me. "Let's go then, we have to save one of ours." He whispered, sounding very low as he was opening the pilot's door and me, going behind to sit next to Park.

After I was rightfully seated, Woods started the Huey engine and an few seconds later, we were taking off from the helipad, ready to fly above the jungles to join the supposed LZ that was very far from our location and also Rivas team to it. I can say that having her & her team to check things in advance will maybe help the ground team to not deal with too much Naga's soldiers along the way while me & Garrett will check their path in advance.

During the flight, I was pretty silent, checking up my guns in case with, of course, the safeties on on them, not wanting to fire an bullet in that thing like that and also, the ballistic knife that Garrett gave me. Song & Park did also have the same as he claimed to me, put to differents places of their outfits. Sims was, him, really nervous right now, holding his M60 and his eyes focused on the outside view.

"Thinkful, Sims ?" I demanded to him as I was seated just next to him at my right after I finished to take an look to my knife, putting it back at my boot.

"Uhm ?" He chuckled, surprised to hear me talk to him.

"I said that you were thinkful ?" I repeated my question.

"Oh...uhm, yeah, I am." He replied, sounding very low and I was almost not able to hear it because of the loud noises of the rotor blades. "Just thinking that it's like in the old times." He added, making an little laugh about it.

"You & me are making an hell of an team, remember ?" I joked around as it was something I heard from Adler in an fake memory...'Fracture Jaw'....why I am laughing about this ?...

"Welcome to 'Nam." He exclaimed to me, showing me his M60 in hands until we start to hear some gunshots through the headsets we were wearing, that wasn't something shooting at us, it was the main radio.

"Shit, Rivas." Wolf said, taking the radio in hands to activate fully.

"Mission is FUBAR !" We could hear Rivas's voice very loudly from the radio and by the sound of it, her & her team were in big trouble. "We need immediate reinforcements, falling back to the LZ !" She continued in her message as I was trying to look outside to check if we were soon arrived.

"Hold on, Rivas, we are inbound !" Wolf confirmed to her, meaning that we were close of the LZ before he peaked his head between Woods & the co-pilot. "Get us on the ground, now !"

"Copy that, hang on !" Woods ordered to us before brutally turning the Huey completely and hopefully that we were attached to our seats because I wouldn't like to bump into someone or worse, been ejected from the helicopter.

"Be more brutal next time and no one will be behind." Song scoffed to Woods as she was just near the outside before verifying her M16. It's true that everyone went almost out.

"It was like that before ?" Garrett asked to Sims who shook his head.

"Nope, sir." He responded in an half-serious voice as the chopper was approaching some ruins that was in the middle of the jungle with no trees around, like an small plain.

"I have your visual, LZ is hot !" Rivas voice came again through the radio as I could see in the outside, seeing an warzone going on in those ruins. "Light them up !" She shouted before the radio went off.

"Damnit, goddamn Laos." Woods breathed as he was starting to land the plane on the same ruins we saw from afar. "It's go time, Wolf, get on the gun !" He ordered as Wolf took his 'Death Machine' in hands from the chopper ground "Okay, jump off !" Woods added before he finally land the chopper on the ground.

At his order, we all jumped in an second, Wolf opening the lead with his minigun to fire at everything that was in front of us as the others were quickly moving into cover to escape the multiples bullets that were coming towards through the few soldiers that was making an resistance against us while Wolf was spreading an lot of bullets with his precious 'Death Machine' in hands.

I fired some bullets from my cover with my MP5, hitting some of the lucky guys that managed to escape Wolf's minigun and to say, I was surprised that Rivas was only with an few soldiers on her own as I remember that there were more people with her, meaning that something went very wrong in here, seeing some bodies near us that was dressed up in standard american gear...something was off here.

After an few moments, the fight finally stopped between us, only hearing the wind around us. I only used an mag from my MP5, wanting to get the necessary for the next fights and as I was checking it, Woods finally got out of the chopper with his XM4 in hands, having exchanged places with the co-pilot that was now the pilot.

"Rivas, where's the others ?" Woods asked, looking at her direction.

"We were ambushed, they knew we were coming !" She responded, holding something that was looking like an crossbow in her left hand and pointing to an dirt path leading inside an forest. "Camp is a few clicks east." She added.

"Fuck, we can't abort or Adler is good as dead." Wolf expressed, sounding very serious, walking next to Sims. "Even if they're making an hard fight to us, we can't back down." He continued as it was true since yesterday, Naga wouldn't employ that if Adler wasn't in the region.

"Adler is one tought son of a bitch." Woods exclaimed, looking at the dirt path. "But everyone has an breaking point !" He then looked at me & Garrett. "You two, return back inside and do your recon, you will give us an update once you finished." He ordered and we nodded to him as we start to walk inside the chopper as the pilot was starting the engine again.

"Yirina !" I was called out once I was inside and when I turned my back, I could see Park arriving with Song behind her. "Watch out, okay ?" She demanded.

"I will be, don't worry." I affirmed to her as she was removing her bandana that was covering her mouth, making me move slowly towards her. "I'll be fine." I continued before we pulled in for an quick kiss as Song & Garrett were doing the same.

"Oh my god !" Woods chuckled the only two couple in here, kissing. "Time is wasting, kids." He expressed in an lazy voice before he rolled his eyes.

"See you later." Park whispered to me before she winked at me, putting her black bandana on and I winked back in return.

"Let's move !" Rivas told everyone that was not in the chopper and then, the ground team start to move away from the ruins, leaving us with the pilot.

"Okay, you two." The pilot started, looking at us. "I will be flying above the place marked on that map but it will be an straight flight so make sure to spot things quickly because we're supposed to be an simple Laotian Air Force Huey, understand ?" He explained to us.

"We're good." Garrett answered as he was sitting back at his seat, not attaching himself like me.

"Then, let's go." The pilot said as he was starting to take off the ruins, ready for our recon above the outposts Naga is using in the region.

We flied straight to get ahead of the ground team and like the pilot said, our flight couldn't be suspiscious from Naga's men, meaning that we are going to act like if we were only members of the Laotian Air Force. As it was going to be quick, me & Garrett positioned ourselves at each part of the transport bay to have an better view on each side, having an map in our hands as we were given an replicate from the original one and some binoculars.

For the 15 next minutes, we only flied above two Naga's outposts on the way to his HQ, discovering that they were small and its mens were basically not fitted to be normal Perseus soldiers, mostly members of Naga's cartel but after passing these two outposts, we couldn't go too far as we were at the limits of getting next to Naga's HQ that was filled with AA guns and we weren't going to take an risk.

"Time to head back to drop you two at a strategic location." The pilot told us as we were checking the map, meaning that it was the end of our recon and that we will have to get our feets back on the ground.

"Where do you think we could go ?" I asked to Garrett as we were getting back at our seats

"I don't know, maybe somewhere between the two outposts." He replied, his hands on his map to see where we could land in safety. "There is the safe point we will join the others." He pointed at his map to me where an red marked square was drawed, something I didn't have on mine. "It's at least 5 minutes from...." He was going to finish until we start to hear some ringing like an alert. "What's happening ?" Garrett demanded to the pilot.

"Shit, we've got locked in !" He responded, panicked. "Strap yourselves, I will try to evade them." He exclaimed as he start to make some manoeuvers while us were strapping to our seats, trying to check outside. "Using the countermeasures." The pilot actioned something on the controls panels as an lot of flares were dropped behind the helicopter.

"Damnit, those fuckers are using guided launchers !" Garrett said, peaking his head to look outside. "Fuck, RPGs !" He exclaimed....but it was too late for the pilot to avoid an rocket to hit the tail of the Huey.

"We're going down !" The pilot shouted, trying to take back the controls but it was useless as the Huey was going down and then....it was all black....

I heard an loud crash in my head, trying that it was done until I start to slowly reopen my eyes, figuring out where we just crashed....just on an cliffside. I looked at Garrett who was looking wounded and the pilot....shit, he was dead, having almost gone through the windshield of the helicopter. Me, I was still strapped to my seat, having my head that was hurting me an little, despite the crash.

"Shit....the pilot's dead." I whispered in an low voice before I look at Garrett. "Garrett ?"

"Aaah....my legs..." He was sounding in pain, trying to hold his lap and when I look at his knee, they were badly hit, he wasn't strapped to his seat. "I can't feel them." He added.

"Fuck." I exclaimed, directly starting to detach myself from my seat to move to get to him but then, the helicopter start to move on its side, causing Garrett to move away from his seat and going out. "Garrett !" I managed to grab his hand but my moves caused me to also fall from the helicopter, finding me to hold Garrett with one hand at a least 100 m of the ground while the other hand was grabbing one of the helicopter skid.

"Damnit, shit !" Garrett said, trying to move his other hand to join my hand that was holding him.

"I've got you !" I told him, trying to move him to get on the same levek but...each time I was trying that, the helicopter was moving itself slowly towards the fall down the cliffside.

"This chopper is going to kill us if we move too much." Garrett expressed, looking above him, the crashed choppter. "Fuck....fuck...." He cursed, still moving his other hand to get to me while me were trying to move him to get his hands on the skid but the helicopter was still moving. "Yirina..." He closed his eyes for an second. "You...you have to let me go." He demanded, shocking me at my high level.

"No, I can...I can do this !" I protested against him but he shook his head.

"It's too late, we're going to die before you can do this." He affirmed but I didn't want to believe him, trying to move him. "I can't move my legs and....shit...I will not make it."

"No, please..."

"Yirina...tell Song...I loved her so much." He cut me straight and he was starting to make my eyes cry, still holding his hand firmly.

"No....no." I pleaded, my voice really cracking at this point until he closed his eyes for an second, before reopening them.

"Take care of Park !" He whispered before...he let his hand go away....

"NOOOOOOOOOOOO !" I screamed as I was seeing him fall to his death....unable to do an thing to save him....obliged to watch him die.

I...I wasn't able to save him and he accepted his death like that but I could have save him but there were nothing I could do for that. I was so sad and bad at the same time until I resigned myself to get my both hands back on the skid to use it to get back inside the crashed helicopter and quickly jumped off again until it finally fall from the cliff, finding myself on the ground, trying to figure out what I can do now.

"Hands up !" Someone shouted in front of me, discovering two armed mans slowly advancing towards with AK-47 in hands, it was Naga's cartel members, not even fully protected. "Come on, hands up, american !" He spoke up again, staying at that position with his friend as I slowly got up, feeling the rage inside of me growing up.

"Come on...american...put your hands up !" The other soldier demanded, sounding panicking as he was seeing my face going in full anger as I was finally up, head down and breathing loudly until I closed my eyes, thinking that my rage is taking over me. I then opened my eyes, ready....

"AAAAAAAAAH !" I screamed all my rage and so loudly that birds were scared and it could have been an scream that everyone around at 1 km could hear, my rage was posseding me and I couldn't back down and I wasn't going to do this.

In an second, I got my hand behind me to grab an throwing knife to quickly launch it on the second terrified guy, hitting right into the head. The two were really scared of me, seeing them trembling like a leaf...and I was going to unleash hell on them. At the moment he saw his friend going down by my knife that the first soldier who talked, dropped his gun to the ground, breathing anormally and trying to get back from me...the death that was coming to get him, getting my knife off my boot.

"You son of a bitch !" I shouted to that guy as he was stopped by an tree behind him, no way to escape and then, I put my left hand around his neck while having the knife in the other. "You see how it fucking feel to lose an friend ?" I exclaimed before I start to brutally stab the man in the chest. "You...see how it feels ?" I repeated at each stabbing of that guy as the blood was coming in my hands and clothes until the guy wasn't breathing anymore, stabbed to death by me before I let him go, throwing him on the ground as he was nothing to me.

"Are you here ?" I could hear the dead man radio going on, recognizing the voice on it....

"Naga !" I whispered in an low voice, starting to get the radio in hand.

"Did you check the wreckage of the helicopter ?" He demanded to his guys that were now dead with me still listening to him. "I repeat, is there any survivors to deal with ?" He repeated in an worried voice until I got the radio closer to my mouth, ready to get him aware.....

"I'm coming to get you, Naga !"

[pbandjesse]

I'm feeling a lot better right now. I did not start the day that way though. Today was kind of hard. I just so tired and I didn't feel good. But I wasn't tired enough that I can actually take a nap. I just felt very weird all day.

I woke up and I didn't want to talk about. I stayed in bed until like 10:15. Then I got up and took a shower. I fed sweet pea and have breakfast. And then help give me some energy but I didn't accomplish basically anything all day. Which just annoys me.

I just felt exhausted and so I just laid there. I lie in bed until like 1:15. And I watched videos and didn't think about anything. Eventually I did get up and pack my bag. I felt a little bit better once I took the meds it was supposed to be taking. And then I just really wanted to get out of the house.

I took my bag and say goodbye to Sweet Pea and went and caught the bus. I was like it was coming down the street right as I rounded the corner. And I got downtown to the harbor very fast.

I packed my clock Furby with me to take pictures but then as soon as I get on the bus he started acting weird again so I think it's a combination of the batteries were dying and she's getting jostled too much. Because she's fine when she's just sitting on my bed side. She's been fine all week. So I'm not sure what's going on there but I think she's going to have to stay home for a while. That's okay. I did stop and get batteries before work and that seemed out for like an hour but as soon as I pick her up again it all went Goofy. I took our batteries for now I'm going to see if I get home I'll figure it out. I'll be very sad if she's really broken but I am may have some people in my life that know what they're doing with fixing stuff. Likely. And I would like her to become a real friend and not just James friend.

I got the constellation to drop off my bag. And James was there. And there was some weirdness because there was a retirement ceremony. It was all fine. It was good to see my boyfriend. He was a little distress because he lost his backpack that has all the spike stuff in it. But thankfully it turned out it was at the restaurant he went to on Thursday when he called they still had it. So that was lucky.

He made cupcakes for me and we walked halfway to Taney. He went to go look into if you could find a bolt cutter. We still haven't have any luck. Hopefully something shows up tonight. I have faith that he will figure this out.

Who makes been fine. When I got to Taney I talked to Nick and he said that worse comes to worse he will switch with me for that Taney overnight so I can be on Constellation. Which is what it should have been to begin with. And then everyone was kind of a wreck over at a knee because everyone who is schedule night doesn't have all of their tests and they don't know any of the programs and it's just like a disaster in that they did not think about who they scheduled apparently. So that's great.

It was fun just kind of walking around messing with James and getting stuff ready though. And it's always nice talking to my co-workers. They're the only thing that really makes this job worth staying at. Like I love the customer and I loved the programs but my friends here or what I care about. And it sucks that some of them are being treated worse than me. I'm not really being treated bad. Most of the time. The management really needs to get their act together.

I finished packing up all the stuff in the me and Nick headed out. And it's good night. The weather is held and it's not raining. It's cold but it's not as awful as it was the other night. It really just kind of feels like my apartment right now. My group has been basically like herding cats but it's been fun. It's a good group. We've been jokingly mean to them a few times. Say we're going to throw away all their scavenger hunts and that they'll be murdered if they leave the ship. But it's been good fun and I don't think they're upset with us. We'll see how the surgeries go in the morning because parents can sometimes be weird about that. But it's been fun. And I don't feel as sick as I did. I kind of sound like a frog right now but I think I'm also just really tired.

We are all kind of annoyed that it's daylight savings time and so we are losing an hour of pay but that also means we lose an hour of sleep. So me and Nick are having them sleep in an extra half an hour or so that we can sleep in a half an hour. Everyone seems on board with that so that's nice. I've decided to sleep in the officers quarters tonight. The first time I've tried that. I'm an executive officer tonight.

I hope you guys all sleep well. Tomorrow morning I'm hoping just go straight home. Honestly I hope that we can stop and get my bike but we'll see if that actually works out. And maybe me and James are going to a play? Unclear. I really think it depends on how I'm feeling. It'll still be a nice day. It's supposed to be warm. I hope you all have a good night. Sleep well.

[imaginedilestrade]

Surreal but nice- Part two

Warnings: Swearing, some angst.

Part one

A few months (and bad blind dates) later, Greg found himself standing over you in the middle of his living room. You were teary eyed after a recent scandal involving you was reported in every newspaper and magazine in the world. You didn't know where to go. So you went to Greg.

"Here is okay," Greg assured "Would you like anything? Some tea? A bath?"

"A bath would be nice." You wiped away the tears under your eyes and Greg drew a bath for you. You had just sunk into it and had began to let your worries dissolve in the water when the door opened. It was Jim with his back to you. "You must be Jim..." he slowly spun around on the spot and blinked with shock. He then proceeded to slide out the bathroom before peering his head back in again.

"Just checking..." he assured himself.

After your bath you spent some time with Greg, explaining what had been happening, that you dumped your boyfriend and that you were working on a new movie. Greg helped you with your script. Later that evening Greg offered you his bed, he decided to sleep on the sofa bed. You kissed his cheek and bid him goodnight. Greg was tossing and turning the whole night.

His breath hitched when he heard the floorboard squeak "Hello?" He called out, his heart hoping it would be you. But he was bitterly disappointed "Jim?"

"So uh I see that there is a certain celebrity upstairs in your bed..." He raised a brow.

"Yes? And?" Greg groggily uttered.

"Well, are you two..." he ferociously wiggled his eyebrows until Greg caught on.

"What?! No!"

Jim smirked slightly "Well do you think I can-"

"No!" Greg almost yelled "No! She's worried and vulnerable so just leave her alone and get back to sleep!" Jim sighed and toddled back up the stairs. Seconds later, Greg heard the same squeaking noise "Will you sod off!"

"Oh...okay."

Greg sat up straight upon hearing your voice, "No, no, no! I thought you were Jim!" He stood up and slowly walked over to you, taking in every inch of you. He noticed you were wearing one of his shirts, it reached to the middle of your thighs. It looked like your legs went on forever. Neither of you broke the silence that hung over the room. Greg gently placed a hand on the back of your neck and pressed a sweet kiss to your lips before letting his own wander down the side of your neck. He could hear you forcing a steady breath as his hands brushed down your bare back. He moved the shirt down, exposing your skin to the cool air as he continued to kiss you.

"Wow..." he whispered as he pulled away.

You softly smiled "What?"

Greg shook his head, he couldn't believe that this was his reality "Nothing..." he sweetly kissed you again and felt your hand lace with his, you squeezed it ever so slightly. He took the hint.

---

You lazily woke up the next morning with Greg. You both drew patterns over each other skin as you talked, you were at the bottom of the bed and Greg was at the top, raking his fingers over your calves. That's when an idea popped into your head "I'll be right back!" You grinned and jumped out of the cozy bed, grabbing Greg's shirt you were wearing last night before his trembling fingers slowly undid every button.

That thought sent a chill down your spine and brought a smile to your face.

Ten minutes later, you brought Greg a tray with toast and tea "What's this?" He asked.

"Breakfast in bed!" You smiled and grabbed a slice of toast "Can I stay a little longer?"

Greg reached for your hand and gently swiped his thumb across your knuckles "You can stay forever."

You grinned and took a bite out of your slice of toast "Oh I forgot the jam!" You stood back up just as the doorbell rang. You looked down at Greg "I'll get the jam, you get the door."

Greg pulled on a top and went to answer the door. When he did he was met with camera flashes, microphones being shoved in his face and shouting reporters. He slammed the door shut behind him.

"Who was it?"

Greg looked up to you and gulped "No one!" You rolled your eyes and walked passed him, opening the door again before slamming it shut. Your eyes met Greg's before you rushed to the phone and called your agent.

"Yes, they found me. I have to go, I have to get out of here." You placed the phone back down and rushed up the stairs, Greg quickly following you into the bedroom where you were quickly changing "This is all I need!" You huffed "And you, you stepped out there in pretty much nothing. The press are going to have a field day with this! Thanks to your friend everyone will know that Y/N Y/L/N is sleeping with the man behind the blue door in Notting Hill!"

"You've got to calm down..." Greg tried easing you but it only made you worse.

"Calm down?! Calm down! Do not tell me to calm down!" You went back down the stairs again, Jim checked out the window and announced your agent and chauffeur was at the door.

"Can't you just brush it off? Today's paper will be in tomorrow's bin!" Greg shrugged and smiled. He didn't understand the severity of the situation.

"What?" You couldn't believe how absurd he was being "No Greg I can't just brush it off! These stories stay with me forever! Every time they write something about me all this," you gestured at him "Will be mentioned and I will always regret it!"

A beat passed "I won't..." Greg quietly admitted.

You shook your head and let out a sigh "You don't understand my perspective Greg. I've been in this business for ten years whereas you've been in it ten minutes." The doorbell rang and you put on your sunglasses and braced yourself for what was waiting outside.

That was the last Greg had seen you for months. Honey, being the adoring little sister, did all that she could to give Greg the phone number of your agent in London and New York. It felt like he had looked at the piece of paper she had wrote it down on for hours when he finally dropped it in the bin.

A few days later whilst having dinner, John handed Greg a newspaper. An article was on it saying that you were in London filming. The next day, Greg found himself at the location where the film was being shot. "I'm looking for Y/N Y/L/N," Greg told the guard "She's not expecting me but-"

The guard cut him off "Then I can't let you in, sorry."

"It's alright..." Greg recognised that voice that was sweeter than a bag of sugar and the smell of all the rose petals in the world combined. "I can't chat, we're very busy shooting. But if you want to stay to talk after, and I really think we have to talk...then you're welcome to stay."

Greg nodded his head a little "Alright."

"Good," you briefly smiled "Have some tea! There's lots of it."

Your agent lead Greg through to the location where it was being filmed and handed Greg over a set of headphones so he could listen to the dialogue.

"Who was that man you were with earlier?" Your co-star asked.

You shrugged a shoulder "No one really," Greg furrowed a brow "It's a bit awkward really. Something happens a few months ago. I don't know why he's here..."

Greg felt a bubble of disappointment burst in his chest. He removed the headphones and left the set with hurt and sadness eating away at him. You glanced over your shoulder and noticed that he was gone. But you knew where to find him.

---

"There's a delivery for you!" Sherlock peered his head in Greg's office.

"Can't you deal with it?" Greg sighed as he checked over some paperwork.

"I really think this delivery is for you..."

Greg knew there was no arguing with Sherlock so went out to the front of the shop. He went wide eyed seeing you standing in front of him.

"Hi," you greeted "You disappeared..."

"Yeah well you seemed quite busy so I thought I better leave. I had some things to to anyway..."

You nodded understandingly "Well we finished filming yesterday so I just came by to tell you that...that I'm leaving."

Greg shuffled on the spot "R-right, right..."

"I have have to go away today," you feel your throat closing up and your eyes welling up "I was wondering if I didn't have to leave, if I stayed, if you'd let me see you a little..or a lot. That if you could like me again..."

Greg placed his hands on his hips "But yesterday you told that man on set that I was no one to you," your face flushed with confusion "I heard. I had headphones on and I could hear everything you were saying into your microphone."

"And you expect me to tell the most loose-lipped actor in England my life story?" You forced a broken chuckle.

"Y/N, I'm just a regular bloke who has always been in and out of love, but can I just..." Greg paused for a second, wondering if he was doing the right thing or not. His head and his heart battling it out inside him. "Can I say no to your request?"

You blinked and smiled, even if it was strained "Yes," you hoped he didn't hear your heart crack right down the centre "Of course."

"The thing is, Y/N," you could barely look at Greg as he spoke "I don't think my heart or myself could take it, you know being cast aside, which I probably would be. You live in Beverly Hills, I live in Notting Hill. My mother and work colleague barely remember my name, everyone in the world knows yours."

You nodded and your gaze fell to your feet "I know, I know...but also don't forget," you looked up to him, ignoring your throat closing in on itself and your chest concaving "I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy," your words were tight and quiet but you managed to get them out "Asking him to love her."

Greg couldn't say a thing. He was so taken aback by your words. They were true. You leaned forward and pecked his cheek, bidding him goodbye while he stood there in complete and utter surprise.

Greg turned to his family and friends, they were always good and helping him through tricky situations and this one was the most difficult yet. They all supported his decision to turn you down, all except Jim who called Greg a 'stupid prick'. Greg then realised that Jim had a point.

Deep down Greg truly loved you and he knew that you might feel those feelings back. It then hit him that he had made the wrong decision. He wanted you. He wanted to make you laugh. He wanted to make you smile. He wanted to be there for you when you were sad. He wanted to hold you against his chest every night and look up to the ceiling as you slept to thank whoever was listening for the moment he was sharing with you. He wanted you.

And you wanted him.

---

Upon arriving at the Ritz with all his friends and Honey, you had already checked out but the receptionist informed Greg that you were holding a press conference in the Savoy.

Greg squeezed his way through the crowd of press and photographers until he finally caught a glimpse of you. He noticed that you were staring at a spot on the table whilst your agents answered most things for you. "Last time you were here, you were photographed with a young man, who is he?"

"Uh," you cleared your throat and answered the reporters question "He's a friend, he's still my friend...I think..."

"You over there," your agent pointed to Greg who's arm was sticking out.

"Yes, umm, Miss Y/L/N..." you snapped your head up and found a par of brown eyes in the crowd. A very familiar pair of brow eyes. It was surreal seeing Greg in front of you "Is there any circumstances in which this friend of yours could be more than just a friend...?"

You noticed the twinkle of hope in his eyes "I don't know," you replied "They made it quite clear that they didn't want anything more than just friendship."

"But what if-" Your agent cut Greg off but you insisted that he continued, you were almost falling off your chair with anticipation "But what if this man, Mr Lestrade, realised that he was being a daft prick?" The hall erupted with uttering reporters, some laughing at his remark. You tried your best not to smile too much and retain your collected composure "Would you then reconsider?"

The hall went silent, all eyes were on you but al your eyes were on was Greg "Yes, I believe I would..." you smiled and noticed Greg out let out a sigh of relief.

"That's good! The readers of 'Horse and Hound' will be delighted!" The crowd chuckled and you couldn't help but laugh.

"Y/N, how long to you intend to stay in London?" Another reporter asked.

You kept your eyes locked on Greg, the man who had captivated your heart, as you replied.

"Indefinitely."

------------------

Tags: (let me know if you'd like to be tagged/untagged!)

@daynaan-black-dawn @the-baby-bookworm @imnottalkingtoyou @theyre-my-divsion @girl-next-door-writes @annkli @wcsteland @heyyou-guys @redgreyandpurple @damnitman-jamlocked-inthetardis @princesspeach212 @imayjustbejamesmoriarty @disneymarina @-waythe- @sherlockedtash88 @fantasticwizardnerd