#but a guy i fancy called me pretty and im dying inside

[obsessedwithitall]

HE CALLED ME PRETTY

[organic-guacamole]

episode 210 here we go

awww seb doing the intro

congratulations to milky white and her baby chocolate milk😌

seb is so funny

but seriously, clean up that milk fast or else it will smell so bad in there....

was that Lauryn just randomly doing cartwheels? idk any theatre kids irl but that seems like it's a common thing...

is it just me or has ms Jenn been getting more harsh to Ricky and Seb mainly-

like what did they do to her

no because I actually snorted with laughter at the "you came back" WHAT IS THAT VOICE-

AND THE MASK OMG

yeah so my throat hurts now

I'm dying over here

KOURTNEY'S FACE

SAME GIRL SAME

Ricky's fake death got the whole place in tears /s

he looks like an asthmatic walrus

Seb's on piano, I love

we all know if he was the beast we'd all actually be crying✋

ok but I listen to Julia's version of home on Spotify when I want to cry-

right so gimme a second

is Ricky scratching his face.....while he's dying?

"belle i-" *flop*

round of applause to Ashlyn for trying to make Ricky's earthworm seizure look less.... yknow

Kourtney's just dying there

WAIT IS THAT NATALIE

did she really just disappear for 9 episodes just to come back and stare dramatically into the camera

WAIT SCRATCH THAT SHES HERE TO MURDER ASHLYN AND RICKY

oh so Ricky's wearing a gay shirt now too

so that's the real reason why Rini broke up, see y'all next season when Gini and caswen become canon /j

wait that was a long intro scene-

what was that look Carlos-

TALK TO MY BOY OR ELSE

carlos' run is so funny to me

therapist Ashlyn to the rescue

"that is...super" son you good?

ms Jenn call Benjamin, he would willingly put his loved ones on a rocket and blast them into Venus for you....

maybe

"I don't want you kids to be disappointed" girl you do realise you're the one that's most invested in this?

"a smooth opening night" wasn't there just 1 show though-

like their opening night was closing night too

"I think I was Troy at one point" PLEASE THATS THE MOST ACCURATE DESCRIPTION OF THE SEASON 1 FINALE

me Jenn looks like a serial killer during that clap and I'm lowkey scared for zacky

"I have notes"

oo if you're taking suggestions, lemme get my list

"mother is freaking out" uhhhhhh

right....'mother"

"is everyone sitting down?"

*looks around awkwardly*

*big red slowly sits*

"no..."

please seb was the only one sitting-

does that mean Carlos looked at Seb as soon as he walked in and assumed that everyone else was sitting too or am I a seblos clown🤡

"is this about the transformation"

WOW MAYBE OT IS RICKY

WOW HES A DETECTIVE FOR FIGURING THAT OUT SO QUICK🤩

YO WHY IS NATALIE HERE-

she just shows up when it's convenient? is she gonna be at the sleepover too?

Seb's heavy swallow after Carlos shouts at him makes me so sad

"I never learned how to lie but I figure if I keep my mouth closed, I can't tell the truth" *nods and smiles at Nini when she asks*

why are they casually standing up all over the pizza shop, just sit at a big table and talk instead of blocking passageways and blocking off at least 6 tables-

"how about I invite myself" WHY DO PEOPLE ALWAYS FEEL THE NEED TO INVITE THEMSELVES TO ASHLYN'S HOUSE-

YOU CAN ASK BUT JUST FORCE YOUR WAY IN?

so Cash Caswell has a bigger house than... Dennis Caswell.... who would've thought

ah yes there's the good old EJ 1.0

Nini: "boys vs girls"

Gina: *looks devastated and glances longingly at EJ*

way to be inconspicuous

"but north high should be" *cracks her knuckles in the most uncomfortable way*

good for Ashlyn for getting more confident though

oo bossy big red

"i get bossy around the power tools"

is that why Ashlyn was holding up the drill in episode 8 orrrr 🤠

oh

Lily, leave him alone please

she's literally not blinking, is that what makes her creepy?

the diss at big red and his face afterwards is priceless

isn't that similar to what Gina's mom said to her in season 1? hmmmm

but seriously please don't try to redeem lily, let us have a character to hate, or to love because they're evil.

not everyone's a good guy.

"im not liked here and I don't know what to do"

let antoine finish his salad and it'll fix everything

"hug emoji" *gags*

y'all realize Lily's literally 14?

why is she calling a 16/17 year old from another school for personal advice-

"he gets weird around tools"

I shouldn't be laughing so hard

"deja vu maybe?" awkward silence

I'm dying here I love EJ so so so so much

"where's seb"

*cuts to seb being held hostage hoping that they'd notice he's missing and go look for him*

"don't ask"

"oh ok"

"100% real faux fur" as you should queen

sponsored by target

Kourtney is singlehandedly saving the entire show.

Seb making finger guns make me happier than it should

why is this kinda making me want to have a co-ed sleepover with my non-existent theatre friends

YES YOU DO NEED TO TALK/SING TO SEB CARLOS THANK YOU FOR KNOWING THAT

wait what-

you haven't talked to him all WEEK-

Carlos are you stupid /hj

Benjamin is so adorable I can't

he turned around to come back for her instead of going home. you're "what do you want Jenn🙄X act isn't fooling anyone Benjamin 🙃

10101

1+4+16= 21st?

they placed 21st?

or do I just not remember how to convert to base ten

GIRL DON'T BE RUDE TO HIM, HE'S GONNA SAVE YALL

no ms Jenn, the kids are not eccentric 35 year olds.

aww sebby

is he thinking that Carlos is only with him cuz he's the only other openly gay guy at school-

son you are a perfect little bean don't put yourself down

yes they all ship portwell as they should.

they'll be throwing risotto at the wedding.

not the chocolates. stop there are no chocolates. please stop I'm dying.

Gina you don't have to explain yourself to her

it was a misunderstanding and it's in the past

why is Ashlyn still laughing-

exactly it wasn't a big deal please just move on Nini

Kourtney really be out here saving everything

WHY IS ASHLYN STILL LAUGHING

why do I feel like when Gina finally told Ash about it, she didn't think it was that funny but wanted to feel included in the inside joke so now she brings it up randomly to show that she's in on it....I totally don't do that...

"idk, the farmer type" oh son...

Ashlyn and big red are just spilling the secrets back and forth huh?

OOO EJ AND GINA SITTING IN A TREE K-I-S-S-I-

cmon guys don't look at me like that-

"she is the best" and "we're buddies" don't sound right together

"pretty boy" "sweet boy" best ways to describe EJ

I love him.

and aw he's scared of rejection so he'll hold back just to keep her happy and not awkward how sweet

is Ricky wondering if letting her go(literally his song from last episode) was the best thing he did for Nini because he doesn't feel like it now? hmmm this is getting good

why is everyone so invested in Kourtney and Howie's relationship

PACK UP THE LAZY RICKY THING

oh yes Benji, that's exactly what she's doing

she couldn't follow her dream or whatever so now she's using the kids to gain some of the success she craves. why else would she have that massive hsm poster with her name on it in huge letters in her office.

just casually grab his hand with both your hands and stare at him creepily 🥰

ship jennzzara y'all

the first bump was a missed opportunity to do the baymax "falalala" as a reference to the fact that they watched big hero six while committing arson✋

wait so big red and EJ just left Ricky in the basement and now Ricky invited Carlos when they're supposed to be at the stage?

help no Ricky looks like he's about to tell Carlos he likes him (I know it's about writing the song for seb but still, look at his body language and tell me it doesn't look like that)

Ricky is so mature about this, he really just wants Nini to be happy even though he's hurting-

baby you deserve love, maybe Nini isn't the one for you but don't say you don't deserve it

why does he keep adding bro to the end like he doesn't know how to address Carlos

PLEASE CARLOS HAVING TO ADDRESS THE BRO THING

"let's write a song when we have like 45 minutes to get to the place and help our friends possibly win $50000 at the show in 2 weeks"

"can you hit a high C?"

"that's like the bottom of my range"

why am I laughing

this is so cool to see friendship interactions that we don't normally get to see

Nini why are you being like this-

Gina did nothing wrong??

I saw that, EJ and Gina being the only ones going in the same direction👀

right so obviously Kourtney's waiting until after the menkies to get back with Howie just in case he really is just using her as a way in to east high... obviously... right?

CARLOS

OK ITS COMING GET READY YALL

Why is portwell so awkward all of a sudden

OMG EJ

OMG GINA SAY YES or not, do what you want.

the way she doubts that EJ would genuinely ask so she has to make sure it's not Ashlyn behind it

OH

THE "NOT THAT I KNOW OF"

LIKE WHAT GINA SAID TO JACK ABOUT EJ BEING HER BOYFRIEND

GUYS THEY'RE SOULMATES

I want risotto now please

THEY'RE SO SWEET AND ADORABLY AWKWARD ITS LIKEEK LITTLE KIDS

OOOOOOO what is this place that seblos is in, looks fancy....and secluded

oh wait no Ricky's just standing there

wait is it the bomb shelter

it looks so good what

HSKAGSJAGAJAGWISGSKAUASBWKSVAIWBAISBQKSHIQBWOABWOABDOQBZIQBAIAQBSIWBQISVQKSIANSGOQBSAISBKASBKWBAIABQOSBBSJAHAJAVAJSBAJHSKAHSJAHAJAJAAJAHHHHHHHH

@youranxiousnerd ARE YOU OK?

CUZ IM NOT OK

LOOK AT SEBBY'S FACE

LOOK AT HOW ADORABLE IT IS

THE LYRICS ARE KILLING ME

SEBLOS IS KILLING ME

I AM DEAD

PLEASE SEND HELP

I like to imagine that Frankie and Joe practiced this in their apartment and just had a blast with it.

or maybe that Frankie practiced in secret like what Joe did for the climb

OH THE SUITS

THATS WHERE THAT CLIP IN THE PROMO WAS FROM

AWWW SEBBY'S SO CUTE

HE'S A LITTLE MARSHMALLOW

they're still so awkward with the dance I cant

let's appreciate Frankie's voice though

this episode really was made just for the seblos and portwell stans and you gotta love it

BIG RED GET OUT

WHY DOES HE ALWAYS DO THIS

Seb's little "yeah" IS ADORABLE

you can't tell me that wouldn't have been the best time for them to say I love you....IF FREAKIN BIG RED WASN'T THERE

ok but wait Ricky needs more hugs like that, look at his face

the boy needs love

"bro" please don't let Ricky and Carlos go back to not talking because their friendship is amazing

EJ laughing at Ricky sounding like a cat coughing up a furball is so funny to me

RICKY'S FLOP GETS ME EVERYTIME

I knew it was too good to be true

ok so Ricky's dead, next in line please

this episode was so short but I love it so much. this is what I signed up for for season 2✋

[olde-scratch]

So I watched LUCIDS 1-4 without any prior knowledge...

and here were my thoughts. I didn’t watch any backstory or anything so enjoy my suffering.

PART 1

“So what happens when the people inside of their dreams go to sleep?” They die

“What happens when we wake up? Do they go on living while we’re not there?” THEY DIE-

“Who are they anyway?” they’re faces that our brain catalogs and stores for later use, although it’s also arguable that every time we dream we go to an alternate reality and inhabit the body of another version of ourselves. Now, were you in a car accident and trapped underwater or-

Are they twins?

(Me tuning out to do something)

“-the squirrel in spongebob was your soulmate, making you a Sandy simp-”

Me, snapping back to the video: hold up-

[missed the part about the worksheet, realized it when i rewatched 10 mins later to make this post]

yall speakin gibberish idk what youre saying-

“I’m gonna go to bed.” bro it literally looks like morning-

“You should get some sleep you look terrible.” i get six hours of sleep a night minimum and i look worse than him shut up bro-

“jump into someone else’s dream” ah i know this con-

why they all got the same face-

haha funni meme

“--an interruptiion can create feedback and tear them apart.” Death. I long for thee.

Is that Karl Jacob’s jacket?

“a second grader” makes me think this is a different school system. [i was wrong? i think?]

“[get him to] eat your apple”

[in the dream sequence] weird dream, but ive had weirder. now, Why Pamper’s-

why does he suddenly have a knife-

“You put a filter on the Dreamscape feed?”

“Technically, you are seven years old.”

???????????

the second hand embarrassment is UGGGHHH

[reading the description] you mean like the guy who was knocked out for 2 minutes on a football field and woke to find he’d dreamt 17 years of his life? oh this shall be Fun

PART 2

[I check the description] “jasper cult” what the fu-

how many camp camp references can i make during this

Is the apple a reference to religion or does the creator just really ilke apples?

“meal.”

“meal?”

meal????

Wait why couldn’t that guy eat the apple? If he wanted it in the fruit bowl, wouldn’t there be a chance of the guy eating it anyways?? Why can’t the guy who brought the apple eat it?

well he’s Dead

[debating if I should read the backstory}

n a h h h h h -

Was he gonna feed the dead guy the apple or something? Why is he upset about the apple in this scene???

oooo the grownups are fightinnnngggg

Is he an antagonist?

HE WROTE A BOOK???

oh now i want food

ESTABLISH JUSTICE ENSURE DOMESTIC TRANQUILITYYYYYYYYYYYYY

“I watched all those aforementioned shows” what shows did i miss something what-

man why you gotta hate on her jane austen fanfic let her live bro

string theory! i can get behind that! sorta-

o no he found the memes-

BOY GOT KNOCKED OUT-

kim there’s people that are dying-

is SHE an antagonist?

quinn? calling himself jasper? u sure hes not just nonbinary? is this just a metaphor for transphobic parenting?

“He died... but somewhere, he grew up.” So is your plan to take a Quinn from a different universe and make him your own, thereby robbing another version of yourself from happiness? When does this ever go well?

Yknow most people, when they lose a kid,,,, kinda,,,,,,, dont go on a ceaseless quest to find another version of their kid that grew up without knowing that another version of his mother was invading other peoples’ dreams to find and kidnap him,,,,,,,, like aint u got a therapist-

“Once you get past the point of not knowing what’s real anymore, you realize it doesn’t matter.” Well, I Got Called Out-

PART 3

“you’re real, oliver.”

aRe yOu sUrE aBoUt tHaT-

“you’ve been infected by the anti-love parasite of Mandadon” the amatonormativity is strong

so anyways ive been infected since birth hbu-

“James Jasperson, creator of Japple” did you mean to Fancy Well-Educated Man in a Black Turtleneck? cause the only FWEMBT i allow near me is prof. hidgens

“are you winning?” says the capitalist

why did you rewind to see his face?? you have the same face????? is this just bc the creator doesnt like working with other people cause in that case same but???????

“it’s a bad idea. i’m not gonna do it.” we’ve all been there. and we’ve all done it.

looks like me trying to study. (i say, a person who has studied a total of five minutes throughout their entire life.)

your “Spartan trial” looks like a bunch of guys standing on a hill pretending to be something they’re not. Let The Man Bring His Snacks.

eat the apple.

is this your first existential crisis or something what a loser lets all point and laugh

“One of you should be spared, the other shall’nt.” did you mean shant or was that a choice-

yall gonna get called out for talking shut UP

“sorry if this is too personal, btw. are you okay?”

me, confused and half understanding what’s going on and also needing to sleep cause its almost one in the morning but wanting to finish what i can find of lucids which i only starting watching cause i saw an animatic of ranboo and dream w audio from it: i don’t know anymore

“i just want my life back... i was gonna get married-” AREN’T YOU LIKE SEVEN-

ay man if this is a sacrificial cult yall gotta get daniel-

UPDATE: I  H A V E  N O T  F O U N D  I T -

“oliver”

I  F O U N D   I  T -

WHICH ONE IS QUINN?? WHO’S JASPER???? WHICH ONE IS BENJAMIN???? I THOUGH BENJAMIN WAS SEVEN BUT I THOUGHT HE WAS THE ONE GETTING MARRIED WHAT-

oliver. eat the apple.

“Can you still have memories even when you’re dreaming?” One time I woke up to my alarm and fell back asleep and in my dream I remembered that I had class in a few minutes and my dream self woke my real self up so fast I thought I was gonna get whiplash. Anyways, I was late to class bc of my computer but that doesn’t matter.

NOPE I FOUND IT. HERE’S THE AUDIO. THE ANIMATIC ONE. FINALLY.

im thinking car crash. but also maybe murder. but also maybe both? is it raining or was he drowning? is he in a coma? hmmmmmm?

wait olivers the one with the apple does that mean he’s the one dreaming? is the ending gonna be him and jasper (quinn? idk) fighting against ben and mrs hills about jasper eating the apple to save oliver from the dream? hmmmmmmmmmm-

waitwaitwait i thought oliver was 7 how is benjamin 7 years younger than him if they look the same age what what what explain america explain what you mean arkansaw-

are the cuts on his nose plot-relevant or

“What if you hadn’t been driving?” So I was right about the car accident but Mrs. Hills still said he was seven so did i mishear her say that BENJAMIN was seven? but even then oliver would be 14 and that would still be illegal-

“How are you feeling?”

“Like you’re a pretty bad therapist.”

mood

“--it makes it all bearable to have power over the stories we write in our heads” that’s why i write fanfiction

HE’S GOT THE NOTEBOOK HE’S GONNA WRITE SOMETHING ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US

WHAT YOU MEAN AN EXPERIMENT THAT’S HIS NAME-

[upon reading the description] so i was right.

wait was that supposed to be the twist in part 2 about the apple in his pocket is that what the existential crisis was about i thought it was because he was introduced to the multiple worlds theory-

PART 4

wait wasnt the other one january 2018 why we going back to 2017-

appol

“--the future and the past all already exist” mhm yep figured this out long ago

there was simultaneously a point in time in which i hadn’t known about this, had been looking it up, had been watching it, and had been writing an ending to this post, and had been posting it the next morning before class. that time is both now and not now. Welcome To The Multiverse Theory or whatever its called-

“--my favorite scene of the movie is waking up next to you.” Mine is eating fast food as I listen to AJJ and play Minecraft. We are not the same.

Now I’m hungry but it’s 1 in the morning and i already put my retainer in god fu-

[reading description] what do you mean previously??? she did that in the first episode????????

[still on description] WHAT DO YOU MEAN WILL QUINN BITE THE APPLE AND GO TO BENJAMINS REALITY ISNT THIS OLIVERS REALITY AND HE HAS TO GET BEN TO BITE THE APPLE WHY IS APPLE CAPITALIZED IS THIS THE DOING OF THE FWEMBT

i should have watched the backstory i should have watched the backstory i should have watched the backstory i should have wa-

[description] oh ive been spelling quinn right the whole time nice

i hope she rejects you /j

WAIT BENJAMIN WAS THE ONE GETTING MARRIED TO ISABELLE

ISNT HE IN SECOND GRADE-

HE IS SEVEN YEARS OLD HOW IS HE GETTING MARRIED ARE THERE TWO BENJAMINS THAT WE’RE FOCUSING ON-

bro get out of the road ull get hit

how do you knOW WHICH ONE IS QUINN THEY ARE THE SAME PERSON-

so

wait

hills wants ben to feed quinn the apple bc in his mind, that will give hills and quinn a happy ending and she doesnt want ben to see the apple bc thats gonna mean ben will know that his reality isnt reality at all. so then oliver has to,,,, not let anyone eat his apple? he just has to wake up?

IS HILLS THE VILLAIN AFTER ALL ORRRRR

wait but if ben sees the apple wont he realize that his reality is wrong and his reality will change, making it so that hills doesnt get her son? or is there some time-based rule that says they’re only transported to the reality that the person believes at that moment? or is this another stab at the multiverse thing where an infinite amount of hills gets their happy endings while an infinite amount of hills doesnt and etc etc?

i should have watched the ba-

oooo dramatique

they’re in a time loop?

nope thats a new powerpoint

wait so theyre,,,, no-

wait-

nvm-

IS THE BEN WE KNOW AN ADULT GETTING MARRIED TO ISABELLE OR NOT-

“they were actually pretty nice” didnt they throw someone off a cliff-

oh so it got confusing THEN??? NOT BEFORE?????

“it all seemed so real.” is that Not the point of vivid REM sleep hallucinations-

is oliver gonna show ben the apple and ruin hills’ whole operation

WHO ARE ALEX AND RYAN-

“what’s 25-8″ bro dont do this to me-

yep hes gonna show the apple

ayyy the guy who stole karl jacobs jacket it back

the second hand embarrassment is back and I Hate It

all that happens in episode ONE??? bro get some better writers that is bad pacing

“it’s the best!” wait until season eight. no show has a good season eight.

quinn knows about the apple thing w the dreams and multiverse and realities dont he

YOU KILLED HIM

NOT KARL JACOBS NOOOOO HES ALREADY DIED ONCE

oliver is v relatable

wHaT iN tArNaTiOn-

lemme hear that explanaton again-

is bill cipher gonna show up? i hope bill cipher shows up. i miss gravity falls

“ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree!” moooooooood

did hills murder quinn

is your family the jasper cult

TOXXIICCCCCC get that lady out of your life quinn that is so toxic

“ ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree!  ah! a tree! ah! a tree! ah a tree!” mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT’S THE END NO WHAT WHY NO

The Adventures of Benjamin and Oliver

he is Not Good

ope-

wait so ben is equal parts an adult AND a child?? okay that clears a lot up

I MEAN HE WAS RIGHT THO BEN U CAN’T REALLY ARGUE ON THAT-

ew get off the floor

butterfly effect, multiverse theory, memory decay, and your imagination ALL exist yall gonna ignore that cause you wanna be famous?

“We already know what the future looks like!”

aRe yOu sUrE aBoUt tHaT-

to add to the list of bad things: Cats (2019)

YA BOI THINKS IT’S NOT ALREADY FIFTY YEARS TOO LATE TO START FIGHTING CLIMATE CHANGE FFFFF

BINGO BABYYYY

get what what

what mapped-

awwwww he thinks THEY’RE creating the multiverse

you gonna dismiss the multiverse theory bc of something you created in your current reality? loooserrrrrr

ABUSE YOUR GODLIKE POWERS

she draggin that seven year old

a lot makes sense now why didnt i do this first-

Jasper

the food shortages-

bro that calculators like 90 bucks at walmart

imagine meeting a stranger and they know Everything about your life like that’s gotta be so weird

what’s even weirder is them telling you you’re the deity of a cult that sacrifices animals

THAT FOURTH WALL BREAK WAS-

KARL JACOBS IS DEAD NOOOOOO

ooohhh there’s context for that

OOOOHHHH THERE’S CONTEXT FOR THIS TOOOO

w h a t -

w  h  a  t  -

W   H   A   T   -

Conclusion:

it’s 2 in the morning and i need sleep but hOOOOO MY GODS THAT WAS GOOD IS IT OVER OR NOT IDK ANYMORE IM TIRED THAT WAS CRAZY I HOPE QUINN AND JASPER GO ON TO BE VERY GOOD FRIENDS, AND I HOPE BENJAMIN AND OLIVER STAY VERY GOOD FRIENDS AND I HOPE HILLS FINDS A THERAPIST WAS A LITTLE CONFUSING BUT I ENJOYED IT

if i dream about apples im suing /j /lh

[bangtansfavwriter]

💘bangtan as boyfriends: jungkook💘

-oh my god this soft boy

-still can't quite believe you guys are dating and sometimes still blushes very heavily when you kiss him

- it took ages for him to ask you out and he probably wouldn't have done it without a pep talk from seokjin who hyped him up before you and jungkook went on a date together

- he was so timid and tripped over his words a lot, so when you asked "are you saying we should start dating?" he went "oh my god yES PLS"

-he know tells everyone that you asked him out first bc "the golden maknae of bts, bangtan sonyeondan, behind the scene, world's best band tbh has to be asked out"

seokjin: makes sense, bc said golden maknae looked like he was gonna pass tf out before you two met

jk: .. hyung why you.... I asked y/n out!

seokjin: lies

you: he did... kinda

seokjin: LIES

jk: I find your lack of faith disturbing, hyung..

seokjin: nerd 😚

jk: 😔✊🏼

- a nerd indeed, but cuteee

- very loyal, it already took him long enough to call you his, so he sure af won't give you up

- also very selfless, he loves helping you out with whatever you need help with... even when you don't ask for it

- like when you had a project due and you were stressing out about it bc you had no time for anything else and stuff... he was really worried you'd skip meals to do your work, so he made sure that you'd eat by either coming to your place or calling/texting you, whenever he couldn't come over personally

-he was afraid he'd bother you while you do your work so he was always very cautious but you reassured him it's fine

-but you felt bad bc you couldn't talk much while doing your work... he looked at you and smiled: "it's ok, I'll write some lyrics maybe.. and you do you. we'll give each other strength with our presence, alright?" he started laughing when you got up and cozied up to him. you spent the next 10 mins cuddling, as this was the only reasonable thing to do after he was being so sweet. "so much for no distractions, hm?"

- you still got your work done btw, so no worries

- movie nights are a huge thing for you two, your range is broad af but mostly consists of marvel, disney and studio ghibli. he has a thing for 80s movies tho, felt ferris bueller on a personal level

- cried when he watched the princess diaries for the first time and will end u if anyone hears about it

-rather savage irl but he cries during some movies, especially when he's tired, he gets emotional and even whiny

- for example: he was very sleepy when you first watched the mandalorian together and you swear he started weeping when he first saw baby yoda and he's been obsessed ever since btw

- very thoughtful and caring

- remembers the smallest things about you, will bring you your fav ben&jerry's when you feel down and enjoys the fact that you look at him like the saint he is

- also memorizes your habits and reads your body language so well that it still surprises you even after all the time you've been dating

-you poke his cheeks on any given occasion and kiss his nose, he's not quite sure why but he enjoys it too

- his hugs are just warm ... they make you feel like everything will be ok

- many pancake mornings together

- will never ever forget any birthday or anniversary, he once did tho and he still beats himself up about it but he was busy as hell during that time so you were ok with it in hindsight (which was greatly appreciated bc he truly felt awful)

- very down-to-earth, it doesn't have to be all fancy with him, he's doing just fine with netflix and ramen

- your personal laundry fairy

- looots of laughter and giggles with this one, always cracking jokes

- you guys have like 48394 insides jokes

you: hey.. hey

jk: ?

you: second goose right left

jk: LMAOOOOO WOFT

you: LMAOOO

jk and you: -dying-

rm: this sounds like some terror code

hobi: or a stroke

- sends u memes at 3am, his go-to are kermit memes as reaction memes, he sometimes forgets to use actual words tbh

you: kook, i can't come over today, working late :( but tomorrow is fine tho, you free ?

jk: -kermit crying under the shower meme-

you: jungkook, words pls

jk: oh sorry babe, yeah im free 🤗

- either uses the cutest nicknames or the weirdest which are pretty cute when he explains it (like left shark "bc you stand out")

- displays of 'strong manly man' when he picks you up, and spins you around only to kiss you --- displays of 'babie boy's when pouts until you give him attention or your last pockys ("we can share, you know 👀" - "oh worm? 👀")

- a true romantic deep down, he once surprised you when he decorated your entire house with candles and flowers bc he knew you had a tough time and you legit just started crying. he was overwhelmed for a sec but knew this was just bottled up emotions and relief coming through so he just smiled and hugged you until you calmed down."it's alright, love... let me take care of you." you nodded and smiled at him, while wiping your tears away. "you're the sweetest, you know that?" - "well, obviously. but fire safety was never my forte, so let's be careful, ok?" he said and you both started laughing.

-sings to you very very often, get used to it, even when you're not right next to him you can still hear him humming from afar and it makes always makes u smile

-you two are fiercely competitive, there is no "it's just a game"... you guys play mario, sonic, rayman etc and there's always a whole lot of screaming

-there was a time namjoon jin got so fed up with this that he took the playstation away (+ mario kart) and jungkook and you had to find other gaming options

-some examples of truth or dare sessions between you (in the safety of your own home):

you: i dare you to dance to begin

jk, in his pyjamas: wha- ... no!

you: truth it is, then. what was the dumpling incident about?

jk: nevermind, I'll do the dance.

you: squeeze the ketchup bottle empty with your thighs.

jk: ?????? jesus, you take your kinks to a whole knew level. choose something else, the stains will be nasty as hell.

you: wear booty shorts👀

jk: you wants thighs and booty, huh? 👀

you: you bet 👀👀

(a blessed day for u tbh)

jk: babe, i dare you to dance to fire.

you: ?????? well, I can try, but you should get me an inhaler, my lung capacity may not suffice for this

(jungkook laughed so hard when did it that he was the one that needed an inhaler)

-takes lots and loots of pics of you when you're together and of the location you went together , posts the view on twitter sometimes and jokes about you two being official (to fans) without really being official

- you two go on walks together, have coffee shop dates, go to concerts (and go fckn feral when u go see iu), visit art galleries where you mostly imitate everything and touch things you shouldn't touch, go to karaoke places ... and you also do art together! that was actually his idea were he bought a shitload of acrylic paint and huge linen sheets and you had your first painting date, which has become a tradition ever since.

- something that jungkook absolutely loves and appreciates is that you guys never run out of topics to talk about

-the intellectual stimulation he gets from you is pretty much unmatched and that's also something that made him realise he's into you before you started dating

- 2 sides of the same coin: smart, charming and kind // absolute crackhead (remember the vid with his goggles? vids like that are now your exclusive content from yours truly)

- once chased down chickens when you visited a village together and ran away screaming when a huge ass rooster chased after him ( u filmed it ofc)

- lives for dramatics, gains new life power on Halloween when you two do shenanigans on bighit's annual party

- he loves the fact that you're still a child at heart and that you're not too stuck up to scare hobi and jin with michael myers masks on (but you did feel pretty bad about it when hobi almost fainted)

- you're super savage when you want to be and he loves it when you are... ngl... you being assertive and all kinda turns him on lmaoo

-your green card to get him to laugh whenever was saying "you sexy beast" and he'd forget whatever issue you were having before, as long as it wasn't something too important obviously

-loves you show you off, especially when you guys are all dolled up and ready for a night out "look at us being all sexy and shit, like, how dare we look this hot, jimin-hyung hates it when someone looks hotter than him" - "hmmm kook, imagine if I'd have jimin as my date today, the place would burn up" - "...." - "kook, i was joking..." - "right shark" - "I WAS JOKING BABY" - "........say it. you know the deal." - "i would rather die" - "go hang with hyung then, i'm gonna stay home" - "you...." -

👀👂 - "YOU SEXY BEAST" - jungkook laughed until he couldn't breathe when yoongi, who just passed by you two, and you stared at each other, completely mortified. you: how to unsay things... / yoongs: how to unhear things/ jk: -on the floor and in dire need of an inhaler"

- you couldn't face yoongi the whole night, whereas jungkook occasionally stared down jimin who had no clue what the heck was going on and munched on some appetizers

- jealousy is not a big thing for him but he still doesn't quite like it when someone is too touchy with you

- he trusts you, absolutely no doubt about that or he wouldn't have even entered a relationship with you, as he has high standards about who to let into his life, especially with potential lovers

-that's why everyone knew you guys were serious about each other and it was hardly surprising that you got to meet his family shortly after you guys started dating (his mother loved you btw)

-has like 200 pics of the day you met gureum

- an absolute sucker for you, you could say you want the n seoul tower to flicker in purple and pink lights and he would get it done somehow

- very sensitive to touches so ......👀

- loves your room bc he says it always smells like your lotions and laundry

- you sometimes surprise by setting the mood with some smooth music and nice fragrances and the world comes to a halt for him, it's just him and you

-shower him in affection and he's putty in your hands, legit, when he first performed euphoria and did the high note at the end you spammed tf outta your messenger and hyped him up and he actually got so hype he jumped around backstage after the concert and sprinted to you when he saw you, twirled you around and, for the first time, kissed you while the guys were there

-he still gets teased about it tho, but he doesn't really care bc your support means the world to him and he values it too much to care about the guys

-you guys went home that night and he serenaded you while you were cuddling. you guys started talking about songs, especially your favourites. you got sleepy when he started talking about 'home' and softly sang it to you, until he realised you dozed off. he smiled to himself and caressed you hair, as you had layed your head onto his chest. admiring your sleeping figure, closely entangled with his broad frame, he said to himself: "this is home..."

[fallen029]

Familial Partings

They were both asleep.

The kinda sleep you get when you're tangled up in the blankets (and another person), after having been so tired, so exhausted the night before that you just passed out, eventually, and were dead to the world. The kind of sleep you got when you were completely free of all responsibility the next day and had no intention of awakening at the dawn. Perhaps even noon.

The kind of sleep that typically eluded the cantankerous dragon slayer and pretty eyed bartender.

Mirajane usually had to be down at the bar just as the dark sky began to lighten, in order to properly open up the place for daily business. Laxus, on the other hand, typically either found himself out on a technical S-Class that required him to be up early and, when this wasn't the case, adhered to a strict regimen of training that involved early morning attention. Both were rare to escape these constraints.

But when his woman, his demon, told Laxus the afternoon prior that she was going to be off the entire next day, well, fuck, all his plans went right out the window and all he wanted to do was be with her. In ways they typically couldn't. She giggled at the idea of sleeping in and then going out to brunch together while Laxus imagined their evening together, later that night, with a fancy dinner and, hopefully, a happy ending.

It was perfect. It was great. It was...flawed, because they forgot one essential thing.

"Well, it's over, boss. I'm packin' it in."

They had the least accommodating family/friend group in the world.

"Bickslow, what?" Laxus grumbled as he stood there, still rubbing sleep from his eyes, as he held open the front door to reveal one of his bodyguards. "What's going on? And what's with that box of stuff in your hands?"

"It's for you," he said simply. "And Mrs. Boss. To remember me by. Nice skivvies, by the way."

Laxus refused to be shamed for his special heart adorned boxers from his love in his own house. Still, he did step behind the door a bit more, a snarl in his tone as he questioned, "What's going on? You offin' yourself or somethin'?"

"Nope."

"Right, couldn't be that lucky."

"I," Bicslow informed him as, when the man wouldn't take the box he outstretched to him, the seith instead moved to drop it on his doorstep, "am hitting the road."

"I'm going to hit you if you don't fuck off."

"Ah, boss, you sly dog, you," he snickered as, the five wooden babies to circled the man's head, gave off their own unsettling chuckles. "I loved ya, you know that? The entire time."

"Bickslow," Laxus complained as the seith pushed up his sallet. "Seriously, are you fucking dying or something? Because if this is some kind of ruse-"

"No ruse. Just some man to man loving."

"Yeah, that's great, but I was having some dragon to demon loving and snuggling going on before you started knocking at my door. So if you're all set-"

"After you take this box of my belongings, I will be."

"If that's all it takes-"

"Dragon, what's going on?"

Mirajane was there then, peeking around the door as well. Bickslow whistled lowly, at the sight of her in her robe and Laxus, immediately, took to dragging the woman closer to him with a glare.

"Bickslow here," Laxus grumbled, "was just leaving."

"Mrs. Boss," the seith greeted instead. "Ah, this is so hard. I'm tearin' up, out here. I hoped to just speak to the boss here- No. You know what? I can't anymore. Do this. Call the two of you that. Mirajane. Laxus. Two of the dearest friends I know. We've had some ups, we've had some downs, but I just want you both to know, throughout it all, I saw you both for what you really were; my girlfriend's sister and her sister's boyfriend."

Again, his sallet was pushed up, to wipe an eye, and while Mira was staring in awe of this, Laxus only narrowed his own eyes.

"What exactly is going on here?" he questioned the other man. "Bickslow? What's up with you? Are you high? Or on some sort of illicit drug? Because Freed's the guy you go to with that shit. Not us."

"Illicit- Ah, Laxus. You always were a bit outta touch, eh? Me and my controlled substances. You and your alcoholism."

"I'm not an alcoholic!"

"Well," Mira began and ugh.

"We were quite the pair at one time, weren't we?" Bickslow questioned. "Why, it feels like just a few days ago, we were slinging back shots up at the guild and getting shitfaced while mackin' all all the hot girls."

"We've never done that. Together. And you've definitely never done that at all, with anyone." Then Laxus glanced to his side at the frowning Mirajane and insisted, "Neither have I."

"And Mirajane. Blessed Mirajane." Bickslow sighed softly, his dolls somehow harmonizing with this. "Feels like only yesterday I was sitting up at the bar, while you were there, working the bar."

"I mean," the woman remarked, "that's such a generic memory it probably did happen yesterday."

"Long were the days, huh, guys?" Bickslow whistled low. "I remember, Laxus, the first time we met. There I was, knee deep in your grandfather's pants-"

"What?" Mira asked as Laxus growled.

"Pockets," the slayer complained. "You were trying to pickpocket him and I caught you."

"I'm glad you look back on that fondly as well," the seith snickered. Then, looking to the woman, he said, "Then us, Mira, we were always clandestine, huh? Never could get that timing down."

"What are you talking about?" the woman questioned as Laxus was trying to decide if it would be worth it now just to strike the other man down with some lightning.

"Don't play shy," Bickslow insisted. "Coy. Obtuse. Dense."

"I'm not playing anything," Mira assured him and Laxus, though not wishing to, had to nod at that.

She wasn't.

"I was the one you were originally after," Bickslow went on. "Remember? In the beginning? You were this close to bein' mine and then the bo- Laxus. Laxus swooped in and stole you away."

"I...don't remember that at all."

"'cause it ain't what happened," Laxus assured her.

But, of course, Bickslow only shrugged as he insisted with varying inflection, "Tomato, tomato. What's important is that, after all this, all the ups and downs, all the secrets and stories, revelations and rendezvous. The trips! The adventures! That time I passed around your sex tape like it was a hot commodity."

"Alright, time to leave." Laxus didn't even sound pissed. Couldn't force it. Just took a step towards the other man, menacingly, while Mirajane made a face. "Now."

"I'm goin', I'm goin'," the other man insisted, taking a step back of his own while his babies, always fearful of being struck down by the slayer, flew further back as well. "I just, uh, wanted to give you guys this." And Bickslow kicked at the box then. "It's some stuff, you know? For you guys to keep? Give it to your kid. When you have one. 'cause oh, man, I just know you'll have one. Or two. Or three. But give 'im this. In remembrance of me and all. I probably wouldda been his favorite uncle."

"Bickslow...are you sick or something?" Mirajane asked as Laxus, still tense, eyed the other guy with uncertainty.

"Nah," he told her with a shake of his head. "Nothin' that sad. Just the sadness of partin' from your friends. Your family."

"Parting for where?" Laxus questioned, suspect of the seith's motives.

"Dunno yet, honestly, bo- Laxus." The man frowned then, looking at his feet with a shrug. "Where does a dark knight like me go, eh? When he's done here? A place like here? Fairy Tail. Can't rightly force myself to walk into the hall, get this old thing removed." And his stuck out his tongue, flashing his guild marking. As it was slurped back up, between his teeth, he said, "Think I'll probably keep it for now. A member in name. In spirit. But-"

"Where," the slayer questioned again, sounding more serious now, "are you going, Bickslow?"

"Wherever the big open road takes me." He laughed then, humorlessly, as he shook his head. "My parents were wanderers, you know. Travelers. With a circus! I'm not much one for that sorta thing these days, but I think their restless spirits, their travelers hearts, their wonderlust, its all built up inside of me, leading me on, yeah? I came here, to Magnolia, to Fairy Tail, because I needed a home. And friends. And family. But I've gotten that. I've tasted that. And while I'm thankful for it, for every single person who showed me any portion of that, throughout my years here, it's just time. For me to move on to the next phase in my life. The road's callin' and me and my babies are answering. I'll miss you. Both of you. Especially you, Laxus. But if you came to me, with the same request, I'd grant you with the warmest send off I could think to give. So I hope you return the favor."

They all stood there for a moment, the three of them, while the dolls floated about aimless, but captivated by their father's words. Mirajane and Laxus felt that, honestly. Captivation. He'd never spoken so eloquently, so from the heart, his true heart, not that character he chose to portray when they all got together. This was the real Bickslow, speaking to the real Mirajane and Laxus, and though their relationships all intersected and entwined so heavily, the idea of him unweaving his abruptly didn't bring them hesitance, but rather understanding.

After all, who knew better about the metamorphosis of one's life and standing more than Mirajane Strauss and Laxus Dreyar?

"Oh, Bickslow," Mira gushed as she jumped forwards then, from her place in the doorway, to go hug him. Tripping over the box at their feet in her gusto, she fell into the arms of the man, who hugged her tightly in return, and they weren't the most strained relationship of their Thunder Legion/Strauss sibling power group, but certainly one of the more underrated. But as they embraced that day, tightly, there felt like there was nothing stronger than the bond between them. Into his shoulder, she whispered, "I hope you find whatever you're looking for. Out there. And come back, of course, to visit. And definitely sooner before Laxus' and I have a kid. We haven't even had our wedding yet-"

Laxus cleared his throat then, feeling it necessary, because atop all the other chaos their morning had provided so far, he was not looking forward to either of those discussions again. But as Mira and the seith broke apart, but made something of a face and, stepping over the box, came to at least pat the man on the shoulder.

"You'll do well," he insisted to the man. "Wherever you go. I expect you to. Here or there, you'll always be a part of the Thunder Legion."

He sniffled then, Bickslow did, but didn't raise his visor to wipe his eye. Instead, he nodded at both the duo who were just realizing they were rather undressed to be on Laxus' front porch step, and were slinking back into the house.

"Oh, the Thunder Legion," Mirajane recalled to the man then. "Have you broken the news to them yet? Have they taken it well? I can't believe you're leaving them behind."

"Freed and Ever are both very understanding people," he told the woman simply. "Or, at least, I think they will be. When I tell them."

"Bickslow," Laxus warned, but the man only waved a finger at him.

"Na-ah, man," he chided. "You have no control of me anymore. Remember? I'm going to be a man of the streets again. So keep check of your pants, eh?"

It felt storybook. A fitting end. And though both Mirajane and Laxus, still rather sleepy and dazed by what happened, could stick that moment in their mind and treasure it always. A snapshot of their frequently aloof, but (not) always well-meaning friend. They'd all grown so close, in a new way, the past few years, as the Strausses incorporated themselves with the Thunder Legion, and become much closer to a blended family than groups of friends.

And if anyone in the family were the mother and father figure, it was the demon and the dragon.

When she moved to pick up the box, however, something crossed Mirajane's mind and, as the man wasn't completely off the property yet, she called out to the seith, "Hey, Bickslow, what about my sister? Are you guys going to try and stay together through this?" Then, frowning, she asked, "You're not trying to leave town wtihout telling her, are you?"

"Ah, no, you know it's not that," the man insisted as he glanced over his shoulder. "Me and the kid are destined to be."

"Then-"

"She's coming with me."

And Laxus didn't know why, after so many examples of this never being the case, that he ever thought he could just have a peaceful day at home, with his woman, and no interference from the rest of them. The morons they called their friends. Their family.

How naive. How idiotic.

There was a mad rush then, as Bickslow left, for Mirajane to change into her dress before tugging the still attempting to get dressed Laxus out of their home and all the way over to Bickslow and Lisanna's apartment where she didn't even knock.

Just threw the door open to come and stand just inside, her darkest gaze in her bright blue eyes, keyed in on where her sister was, at the moment, packing up a box in the front room.

Bickslow was standing before Lisanna, clearly having rushed right over to inform the woman of the impending doom that would soon be upon them. And oh, as Mirajane looked ready to wag a finger or two, Lisanna knew it was, without a doubt, upon them.

"Mira," Lisanna started, a frivolous hope to get out in front of something she, clearly, was going about to be steamrolled by. "I was going to tell you, but-"

"When?"

"Well… I was going to leave a note, I mean."

"Lisanna-"

"I have to be my own person now." She shot up, Lisanna did, from where she was putting away trinkets and things. Making a face over at her sister, she insisted, "I need to branch out on my own. Away from you. And Elf. And even Laxus. Natsu. Master. Happy. You've all become such a safety net for me, since I've come back, and it's stifling my growth. You all wanna bottle me up and protect me, but you can't. I'm a grown woman and I can do what I want. I have to do what I want. This has all been weighing on me, on us, me and Bickslow, for so long and we just feel like we've become stagnant here and we need to go, we have to go, to find ourselves, our real selves, and if you take that from me, if you stop me from doing that, then what was the point, Mirajane? Of me coming back? From Edolas? What was the point in any of this?"

While her plea was impassioned, it was not nearly as throughout or planned as Bickslow's from before which is probably why, without even a second of thought, Marianne retorted, "You're not leaving. End of discussion. Dragon-"

"Yeah?" He was standing behind her, hoping to fade away from what was about to be a huge sister blow up, he just knew it was. "Mira?"

"Lisanna is moving in with us. She's not ready to be on her own. Clearly."

"O-Okay, demon."

"No!" Lisanna had seemed nervous, ill-prepared, before, but now she was animated and stalking over to her sister while Bickslow and his babies quickly busied themselves with pretending to pack up as well. "You can't do that. You don't own me, Mirajane."

"I didn't say that I did," her older sister huffed. "But if you're making irrational decisions like this-"

"It's not irrational! I just told you that we've been thinking about this for a long time and-"

"Oh, have you?"

"Yeah!"

"Or has he? Huh? Are you thinking for yourself," Mirajane challenged. "Or are you letting your stupid boyfriend do the thinking for you?"

Bickslow, during this sisterly duel interlude, eventually found himself walking up to the woman, but still out of her perfrials, just to call out, "Hey, Laxus. I was meaning to ask you before-"

"Not the time," the man complained from behind his girlfriend as she stood, berating her younger sister, before him.

"-do you think you and the future missus would mind keepin', oh, all the shit in my apartment while I go on my lifetime sabbatical?"

"Bickslow, what?"

"Also, I'm behind on rent this month and if the landlord sees me leavin', he'll have my hide, so maybe either pay the man or take the stuff outta here under the cover of darkness?"

And suddenly, Lisanna wasn't the only one behind scolded for her dreams of a brighter future.

This was how, as neither the slayer nor demon had thought to close the front door, the others found them. Freed, Evergreen, and Elfman. Though an unusual trio, they weren't so unusual that day as Ever and Elfman had met Freed at the guildhall where, upon finding neither of his sister were working that day, the muscular man suggested they go around and see if each of them would like to do some sort of big, group outing that day. It had been a bit, since they'd had either a party or a nice group dinner. Just long enough that Ever and Freed, while hesitant, weren't completely oppose to that idea.

Which, like Laxus, was their mistake. For assuming they could ever just all exist, all of them, in their Thunder Strauss hybrid, as anything more than jumbled masses of moronic tendencies.

They'd heard the arguments brewing, both between the sisters and the two men, before they approached the still opened front door and, at the sound, all three hesitated for a moment. But then Elfman was rushing forwards because Lisanna and Mira fighting never spelled anything good while Freed rushed to defend Laxus (or save Bickslow; he wasn't too sure yet) and Evergreen had to sigh, the deep kind of sigh she reserved for just such moments where she realized, with certainty, that the choices in her life which led her to this very moment were surely punishment for some past life transgression.

Surely.

It was the only answer.

It took a bit to settle things out. Laxus was agitated, now twice over, and Mirajane was near hysterical over the thought of losing her sister, which only, in turn, revved Bickslow up and, for Lisanna, put her in the same state as her sister. Freed and Elfman, though they wished to help, did little as Freed, immediately, set in on Bickslow about irresponsibility and his proneness to it while Elfman, being a Strauss, quickly became just as hysterical and oh, Evergreen hated being the only level headed person in the group.

"Enough," she finally barked at all of them. It was less her voice though and more her slamming the front door of the apartment behind her that caused them all to pause, just long enough for the woman to give them all a harsh glare from behind her glasses, as if tempting them to remove the barrier. "Look at you. All of you. Why do we always have to be like this? It's almost as if we shouldn't all be around one another if-"

"Yes!" Bickslow, who at the moment had his shirt balled up in Laxus' fist, who was lifting him slightly off the ground. Turning in the slayer's grasp, he grinned over at where Evergreen stood by the door. "That's what me and Lissy are sayin'. It's time to move on."

"I'm confused," Freed admitted, taking a step back then. "I thought Laxus was berating you about rent?"

"I," the slayer grumbled as, anger fleeing, he tossed the seith back down to the ground, "am."

"But-"

"Who cares about their rent, Laxus?" Mirajane cut Freed off. Turning her dark eyes on her boyfriend then, she said, "They can't leave. Do you hear me, Lisanna? You can't."

"Where do you even wanna go, sis?" Elfman asked, eyes wide and pricking with tears already. "Huh? And runnin' out with him-"

"I'm," Bickslow complained from where his babies floated about his head, fretting, as he laid crumbled on the ground, "a catch."

"She risked catching something from being with you, anyways," Ever muttered with a frown.

"We're just going away," Lisanna insisted then. "For awhile. That's all."

"That is not all, Lisanna," her older sister retorted. "Bickslow came over and told us this big, long monologue about how he's going to go off, for years even, to go find himself or something. And if you're going with him, then what? You're planning on being away for years too? He gave us a box of things to give to our child to remember him by."

"Your what?" Elfman, suddenly, wasn't so focused in on his younger sister. Eyes darkening as well, he stomped over the small apartment towards Laxus. "You! Knockin' my sister up before even marryin' her-"

"You better stay away with from, Elfboy," Laxus retorted simply, turning to face the larger man with a glare. "I'm ready to fucking end all of you."

"A child?" Freed, who'd had his hand on his hilt before, when speaking to Bickslow, had drawn his sword at the oaf's approach of his idol, but lowered it some then as he looked to the oldest Strauss sibling. "Mirajane, are you with child?"

"I got a potion that can fix that," Ever offered her dryly as she inspected her nails.

"What?" She was wholly confused now. "No, I'm- Well, I guess you can never really know-"

"You better fucking know," Laxus retorted while Lisanna looked to her boyfriend.

"You did what?" she questioned as Bickslow only scratched at his head.

"I told you that I couldn't leave without seein' the boss one last time," Bickslow said.

"See," Lisanna insisted. "Not rile up. Or tell our plan."

"Your plan? So you were going to do it?" Mirajane shook her head. "Just leave in the middle of the night. Just like that. Just a note. And be gone."

"You don't understand," her younger sister replied simply. "The note would have explained everything. Probably way better than Bickslow would have."

"Yes," Freed mused absently. "As it is, I still cannot discern whether this imagined pregnancy has sprouted from."

"Don't care," Laxus retorted. "Better not leave this fucking room."

"Unless," Mira sang, thoughts drifting from her sister and to something far more precious.

"I'm telling you," Evergreen insisted to the slayer. "A few drops from this potion and-"

"So should I pummel Laxus or not?" Elfman griped.

"Not," Freed answered, "unless you want to be skewered."

"Don't worry," the slayer grumbled. "Wouldn't happen in the first place, Elfboy."

"You-"

"I'm not pregnant," Mirajane finally decided to declare for all of the interested parties. "And even if I was, that's not what this is about. Lisanna, if the two of you are going on some stupid vacation for awhile, fine, but Bickslow said it would be years before we saw you again. Is that true or not?"

This, finally, seemed to be the tense moment all the previous actions were building towards and Lisanna took a breath, a short one, before nodding her head at her sister and remarking, "It is."

"Lisanna." Elfman, finally, came to rush back over to his younger sister. Tossing his arms around her, his anger for Laxus was immediately washed out by his fears for his younger sister's future. "You can't do that. Just run off like that. For years? How am I supposed to go on, huh?"

"Well," Evergreen remarked simply, "you did get a trial run."

When this resulted in a look from Freed, she merely huffed and rolled her eyes.

"You're not thinking," Mirajane declared for her younger sister. "At all."

"You have no idea," Lisanna retorted, "if I am or not. You just don't like the idea because the tow of you want me to stay here forever."

"Yeah," Elfman agreed. "We do."

"Why," Mirajane questioned, "is that a bad thing?"

"We want it for ourselves," their brother kept up. "Don't we, big sis?"

"We do," she finished.

"But I," Lisanna insisted to them both, struggling her way out of Elfman's vice grip, "don't. I don't, okay? I like Fairy Tail. And I like Magnolia. But it's all I've known since getting back from Edolas. And that's not what I wanted for myself, when I returned. I wanted to see the world. To live. To really live. Again. And I have the chance to do that, with my boyfriend, who I love. We can travel around, experience new things, all together. The way I always imagined. And...I know I should have talked to the two of you about it before, that this is all so sudden and unreal to you, but the only reason I didn't is because I knew what you'd do. How you'd act. And look! You're doing it right now. I'm not...leaving to hurt you. I'm leaving because I need to. Fairy Tail's fine. My life here is fine. But I want something more. You both already found your more and that's great, but… It's my turn. And I need to do it without you. Both of you. I love you. And I'm sorry. But I'm going to go no matter what you say."

This felt like a rather touching moment for the Strauss siblings and, as Lisanna looked deeply into her older sister' similar blue eyes, she saw the flare die out in them before, eventually, Mirajane moved closer, dragging her sister towards her, and as the two embraced, Elfman only stood by, crying softly into his hands.

It was observed by Laxus and the others, silently for a moment, before suddenly, something seemed to occur to both Evergreen and Freed.

"You're," Freed questioned with a frown at the other man, who was finally shoving up and dusting himself off, "leaving?"

"For years?" Evergreen couldn't help it. She was hurt. And it was so hard to get her to that state, that painful reaction to the actions of another, but oh, man, she was reeling then. Coming closer, she was practically spitting as she accused, "And you were going to not even say anything? Just leave us a note? How dare, Bickslow? How fucking dare you?"

And suddenly, the humerous aspect of the Strauss siblings getting so worked up over something wasn't as funny or observational as it was previously. Experiencing it now for themselves, Freed and Ever both went through their quickly cycling stages of grief while Laxus, put out by both groups, watched with a frown.

"I'm not," he insisted when, in the end, Mirajane and Elfman released their sister and Freed and Evergreen both tapped their friend in the arm, "paying their back rent. Or keeping this shit in our house."

"Oh, dragon, yes you are," Mira decided for him with a frown and, though he didn't wish for it, he was weak to the woman's commands.

The demon still had some hold over her sister as well, as it turned out, and marched her down to the guildhall to give a proper farewell to her friends as well as explain her plans to her master. Laxus, however, got stuck on Bickslow duty, which meant helping him figure out his rent situation as well as, with the help of Freed and Elfman, carrying boxes back to he and Mirajane's place.

Evergreen was thankful for the attention never rightly being placed upon her and slunk away to escape either such fates.

Still, they all met when the time came, down at the train station that evening. Elfman was sobbing and Mira looked about ready to do the same, but both Bickslow and Lisanna felt far better with this arrangement than either had about sneaking away under cloak of darkness. Wouldda been fitting, Bickslow felt, for a dark knight such as himself, but sometimes, even the darkest of knights gotta tap into their emotional side.

And boy, Laxus seemed to have ruptured his own.

"Awe, dragon," Mira mused staring up at the man as he rubbed at the tears in his eyes, watching as Bickslow and Lisanna gave one last wave before boarding their train. "You're gonna miss them too, huh? You big softy."

But it wans't that. At all. Rather, after paying way more than just one missed months payment on rent, Laxus had a feeling it wasn't so much the oppressive nature of stagnancy the pair were escaping, but rather some other unpaid loans. Which, no doubt, Mirajane would stick on Laxus. And the second he paid them? The pair would return, but need money to do so, given they fled so far, and he was trying to start a life with his demon, have that little baby demon she was so craving, but fuck, how could he, when she was bleeding him dry?

Laxus wasn't crying for Lisanna and Bickslow's departure.

He was teary-eyed over their eventual return.

Still, it was rather lachrymose that evening, when they all went out to dinner together. Just the seven- Five. Five of them.

It felt incomplete.

"Well," Mira said after taking in a deep breath, seated at the table and looking around at all who were left. "This is for the better, right? Nothing happens without change. Progress. And they probably won't even be gone that long. I bet. So...we shouldn't be too sad. And Lisanna's right. She needs a chance to grow all on her own. Away from us. And it makes perfect sense to send her away with a man who plays with wooden dolls and seems to have some untreated, underlying mental deficiencies and… Dragon...tell me we did the right thing."

Dropping his menu, he moved to lay a hand on the woman's arm as he said, "Honestly, Mira, I have no idea."

"Laxus-"

"I don't," he insisted as the others frowned at him as well. "But I didn't know about gettin' with you. But I'm glad I did. I didn't know about hanging around with your family so much, once we were together, but that's turned out for the better. Wasn't sure how to feel about it, when your sister and Bickslow started getting so close. That's worked out fine. Wasn't sure about how I'd feel, when I came back to the guild, all those years ago, after my time away. I'm thankful I did. And fuck, I didn't know what to do when that stupid kid pickpocketed my grandfather all those years ago, but bringing him to the guild, introducing him to Freed and Evergreen? That was the best thing that ever happened to any of us."

"What Laxus is trying to say," Freed interceded, "is that you don't know, when someone's happening, if it will turn out for better or worse, but you must allow these things to take place. Or you turn out as Lisanna and Bickslow both feared; stagnant. It will be an adjustment for us all, but… I am content in Bickslow's reasoning and need for a departure. Should I return, I hope to welcome him with open arms. Should he not, I wish for the moments where I miss him to be filled with the same understanding I currently hold. Were our lives a reverse, I'd hope him, and all of you, to send me on my way just the same."

"We're mages," Evergreen offered simply though she did sound rather down and would spend the next few days staring into full wineglasses rather than empty. "We roam. It happens."

"Lisanna's such a man," Elfman insisted though, honestly, he seemed to still be attempting to assure himself of this fact, no doubt attempting to fight off the fading shock over the whole thing. "I bet she'll do great out there in the great unknown."

"It's part of life, demon." Laxus moved to pick his menu back up. "Leaving. Coming back. Going again. This might be home, but...sometimes you just need something else. Something you can't find here."

Mirajane nodded, a sad yet understanding one before, softly questioning, "But what happens if of the rest of us go? Or if we all go? Then what?"

"We pay less," her dragon tried to raise her spirits, "when we go out to eat."

But it didn't seem to work.

Still, Mirajane had dealt with and lived through far worse sudden changes in her life. In the grand scheme of things, this one hardly felt that momentous at all. So the days went on and then it was weeks and, slowly, things fell back into a new normal.

A month was approaching when Mirajane was given another day off and, the night before, she and her dragon were sure to spend it well. Which led to them being rather lazy the next morning, in rising, and when they both did wake, even, it wasn't out of a desire to.

No.

Rather, they both felt it.

A presence. Multiple. In their house.

"Oh, gosh, Laxus, put some pants on."

"Oi, boss, don't flash my woman, alright? Lissy's innocent."

The slayer, in his haste, stumbled into his kitchen that early morning in the nude only to find the intruders that sat around his kitchen table, eating bowls of cereal weren't exactly strangers. In certain ways, as he uncharacteristically blushed and rushed back out of the room, he kind of wished they were.

"What," Laxus growled, "are you doing here?"

"We have," Lisanna retorted as she shoved her bowl away, no longer hungry, "a key."

"For fucking emergencies!"

"Lisanna?" Mirajane had strode into the room by then, thankfully in a robe unlike her counterpart. "Oh, it is you!"

"Yeah, sis," Lisanna giggled as the older woman rushed right over to toss her arms around the younger. "It's me."

"What are you doing here though?" Mira questioned before, as she hugged her sister tighter, deciding, "Never mind. I don't care. Oh, I'm so glad to see you. I just don't… Are you both okay? Or-"

"We're great," Bickslow assured her, his babies lying dormant on the kitchen table. "It's a strange thing though; after camping out in the forest for a few weeks, we suddenly realized we kinda, well, you know."

"I know?"

Lisanna titled her head back up in her sister's grasp. "We like living in an apartment."

"Or a house," Bickslow said. "The worst part of going out on a job, after all, is the campin'. Why'd we think that we'd like it as the entire entree? Who knows. But now we're kinda homeless and-"

"Mira, no!" Laxus suddenly began to yell from the other room, running in to stop what he could hear, could literally feel, beginning to start. "Don't do it! Don't-"

"You can stay here," she giggled as he was too late, always too late. "With me and dragon."

"You mean it?" Lisanna questioned.

"Until you get back on your feet, sure," she agreed and he'd been wrong.

To cry.

To allow his hubris to get in the way.

Because, yes, he wouldn't have liked to pay to get the pair of them out of a jam, but oh, this wasn't going to be a jam, was it? The two of them living with him? This was going to quickly turn into never-ending torture.

"Still can't call you boss, I guess," Bickslow snickered with his tongue out, babies floating about as they mimicked this noise in a haunting fashion. "Not Laxus' either. Nope. Landlord it is!"

He should have stayed asleep, the slayer should have. Always. Any time. Whenever they were near, whenever they were close, he should just shut his eyes and pretend they were there. Like a little kid thinking he'd seen a ghost. Or an adult knowing, yet forcing himself not to believe he'd seen a ghost.

It didn't quite matter. Whether your eyes opened back up or not. Reality was reality. And Laxus, after all these years, had finally been duped into becoming the thing Bickslow got over on the most.

A landlord.

"Everyone's back together," Mirajane cheered, that evening, when they had all the rest of them over to celebrate.

While Elfman embraced his sister and Freed and Evergreen grilled Bickslow on his misadenvuter the past, oh, less than thirty days, Laxus only sat sullenly on the couch, watching with his head in his hands as the demon patted him on the head.

"Yeah, demon," he grumbled softly to himself. "They are."

.

It had been a bit. And everyone knows the first rule of every sitcom; at the end of the episode, everything goes back to how it was before. This was inevitable.

[drblood-bringer-of-death]

Yay! Another Tyrian x Watts fanfiction for Nuts and Volts week! Seriously I cant get enough of these guys! Anyway, hope everyone over at @nutsandvoltsweek enjoys it!

Waltzing into love

Warnings: literally just some mild cursing.

They hated it. Every single second of being stuck in the stuffy, crowded room full of pompous, rich assholes. Arthur glared at anyone unfortunate enough to make eye contact with him and he stayed as far away from the dance floor as possible. He hated parties as much as he hated people. He would much rather be back in the grimm lands, tinkering away at his inventions without a single interruption. But he was not the only one who hated being there. As grand and beautiful as Atlesian parties were, they had a very strict policy to them. No Faunus, No improper dress, and absolutely No exceptions. Tyrian, as sporadic and chaotic as the man was, unfortunately was the best fit to go with Arthur to this party. Salem decided that Hazel would be too intimidating, Emerald and Mercury were too young,  and Cinder would have stuck out like a sore thumb. So Tyrian was voluntold to attend as Arthur's date. He sulked even more than Arthur did. He might have even hated it more than the mustached man. Due to the strict policy, Tyrian had to wear what he considered "constrictive" clothing. And worst of all he couldn't even use his tail! Arthur had insisted he hide it, since it was against the rules. Tyrian fought him on it, to no avail as he knew Arthur was right. So the two brooded in their fancy clothing in a corner of the ballroom. They avoided everyone and if it wasn't for Arthur's accursed reputation he would have never even attended this godforsaken party. Maybe he could figure out some way to fake his death or even actually die just to avoid these parties.

"This is pointless!" Tyrian growled.

"It's not entirely pointless, but it's Incredibly dull." Arthur retorted, focusing all his attention on his scroll.

"Why did I have to come here?! I hate this! I feel like I'm restricting all my natural instincts!" Tyrian continued to complain as he pulled on the dark purple tie around his neck.

"Stop pulling at that you'll undo it! And you know why she chose you to come with me. And stop tugging on the tie!" Arthur said angrily as he turned towards Tyrian, who had managed to actually undo his tie. "How did you even? Ugh just let me fix it!" Arthur swatted away Tyrians hands and grabbed ahold of the tie. Fastening it once again.

"Ahem, am I interrupting anything?" The unwanted and annoying voice of Jaques Schnee broke through Arthurs grumbling. His brow twitched in annoyance and he sighed before facing the unbearable aristocrat.

"Why Jaques, what a pleasure to see you again." Arthur lied through his teeth.

"A pleasure as well. Who, may I ask, are you?" He directed the question towards Tyrian who stiffened as a response.

"Uh, Tyrian Callows, associate of Watts here." He shook the older man's hand in forced politeness.

"Well it's a pleasure to meet you Mr. Callows. I had no idea Arthur was into such… interesting company." His tone of voice and the way he glanced at Arthur smugly,  clearly portrayed that he suspected something else. "why I'd even say you might be planning something… more forbidding." Tyrian pailed, could he really figure them out that easily? He looked at Arthur and they shared a panicked look.

"Jaques if you're suggesting-" Arthur started to accuse him but Jaques cut him off.

"Oh come now Arthur, you know i wouldn't care if you were gay, it's quite common nowadays, and I've been suspecting it for a while anyway-" Watts and Tyrians faces went bright red. "I was simply baffled that you managed to find someone to deal with your arrogance." He finished.

"I-my arrogance- excuse me?!" Arthur said offhandedly. Jaques only laughed at him.

"Relax, you know that the General himself is gay right? Really it doesn't matter here, why not show some affection! Have a dance or two! There's nothing to hide." And before Arthur, pr even Tyrian for that matter, could stutter out a response Jaques turned on his heels and walked away smirking.

"Does he think-? I mean really?" Tyrian asked before bursting into uncontrollable laughter. His entire body shook with each inhale of breath. As he laughed and laughed Arthur's face grew more and more red, out of both embarrassment and anger.

"You shut up!" He snapped at Tyrian. Whose laughter seemed never ending. Making Arthurs anger grow.

"Re- hehehe- relax Arthur. Haha, as far as we know, this could be an advantage." Tyrian offered through dying giggles.

"What do you mean?" Arthurs anger sizzled but he stopped feeling the innate need to punch the Faunus. Tyrian wiped a tear from his eye.

"Well think about it. You could gain some massive publicity points if you came out as gay, and if we did it here it would be massively successful. All we have to do is dance a little bit and maybe hold hands. People will come to the conclusion on their own and it'll be all over the news tomorrow. "Infamous inventor Arthur Watts supporting his community through love!" Can you imagine that?" Arthur paused.

Unhinged, deranged, murderous, insane… and intelligent. Those are the words Arthur would use to describe Tyrian right now. As unpredictable as the man is, he could read people and play off them better than even Salem herself.

"That… could work." Arthur poundered. The plan was foolproof, and even if it went wrong then it would cause protests in the communities drawing grimm in. "Yes. It would work quite well." Arthur hummed to himself and Tyrian smirked.

"Well then let's get to it and put on a show!" He cheered in a manic giggle as he pulled Arthur away from their protective corner and into the center of the dancefloor. Arthur huffed behind him, not expecting the pull. Although he should really expect everything from Tyrian.

"I told you to relax already Arthur! All we need to do is dance a bit and act all coupley." Tyrian smirked again and Arthur got some sort of primal feeling in his gut to run. As if something far more sinister than even they had planned was happening. But he ignored it, it was not the first, or last, time he would have that feeling while with the scorpion.

"It's Impossible to relax with you" he retorted harshly, shifting himself and Tyrian into a waltzing position. Slowly the music ran through the room and the many people around them began to move to the three step beat.

"Your words wound me Arthur," Tyrian mocked. "I'm the most relaxing person I know! Well besides Hazel." He held back a giggle.

"Your a caffeinated maniac trapped inside a padded room. I absolutely do not find you relaxing!" Arthur all but growled.

"A bit touchy aren't you? Was it something that Mr. Schnee said that caught your nerves?" He smirked wildly at Arthur who tried his best to keep his composure. As he tried to calm his breathing Tyrians insane smile reached his eyes. "Oh my, your heart rate picked up! I must be onto something!" Arthur started to panic.

"You did not- wait you can sense my heart rate? No, nevermind that!" He attempted to gather his thoughts as he and Tyrian glided across the ballroom floor, sliding in time with everyone around them. If you weren't right next to the pair it would be like they were just enjoying themselves and not having a frantic argument.

"Poor Arthur Watts, not admitting that old Mr. Schnee was right! What an exciting evening this has become!" Tyrians giggles seemed to pour out of his mouth.

"Would you just shut up! I've already said that to you tonight, you psychopath! Now stop talking and lets finish this stupid dance!" Arthur was pissed off now, he couldn't stand looking at Tyrians pretty eyes or his handsome face any longer. So he decided to do something about it. As the song approached it's climax he brought Tyrian into a sudden spin, catching the scorpion off guard. As he pulled Tyrian back into him, he made up his mind. Placing one foot behind Tyrians and throwing his center of balance off, he dipped the younger man. He heard people around them gasp, some of them seemed shocked, but through all the noise he heard two distinct things. One: Jaques Schnee saying " I called it!", and two, Tyrian Callows' sharp inhale of breath. He pulled them back up. Releasing Tyrians lips as he did, and then he turned and walked out of the room.

Tyrian stumbled, that was not expected at all. He knew Arthur was gay but he never dared to dream that Arthur liked him. He got over the shock, more delayed than he'd like, but nevertheless he rushed after Arthur and found the man pacing an empty hallway.

"Why did I do that? What was the logic of that? It was pointless, im pointless. For fucks sake we're both adults why couldn't I just talk to him!?" Arthur mutters to himself as he paced, not even noticing that Tyrian was right next to him. "Damnit, that was so stupid! Why is he so handsomely intimidating? What can't I just be normal-"

"Because you're Arthur Watts, inventor and doctor, smarter than anyone else i know and absolutely hopelessly in love with me" Tyrian interrupted, his voice caught Arthur off guard and he would never admit how much that genuinely scared him.

"Ty- Tyrian look, what I-" he was cut off as said man lunged at him suddenly, crowding his precious space.

"Just shut up and kiss me again" the scorpion demanded as he rolled his eyes and pulled Arthur into him. Their lips crashed together again, yet the feeling was different. Before Arthur could barely feel the kiss at all, but now he felt like sparks were flying down his spine and static was invading his mind. Arthur let himself fall mentally, his brilliant mind failing him when he needed it most, so he just let it happen. Let his body do the talking for once.

Tyrian on the other hand was practically shaking with joy, he had a crush on the doctor for a while now but he truly never believed Arthur would like him back, let alone make the first move! He could not be happier even if his own goddess showed up just then! He felt as if nothing could ruin this sweet moment of love. And he was right, not a soul came out of the party to find them and they were left alone in the hallway. As Tyrian let go of Arthur he smiled. Not a crazed, classic Tyrian smile, but a calm, genuine one. Arthur felt his heart skip more than one beat, and he was sure Tyrian felt it too. Soon enough Tyrians soft laughter bubbled out of his mouth.

"What's so funny?" Arthur asked, his usual scoff lightened just a touch.

"Well the fact that we literally waltzed into love." Arthur's eyes rolled.

"That was cheesy." He huffed as he set his head on Tyrians shoulder.

"No, parmesan is cheesy." Arthur sighed. The moment was ruined by the man who created it. And he could not help the small smile that was hidden by his mustache. Maybe tonight was worth the party.

[flannelpunkcalum]

WANT YOU BACK, TOO

“I-”

“The thing is-”

They both stop.

“You first.” Y/N says, thinking she's being polite, but Calum shakes his head.

“You know how I feel.”

I know you know I will never get over you

Y/N licks her lips. “Fair enough.”

(GOD sorry this took so long but it’s also literally 4 times longer than the original WHICH IS A LOT.

anyway they bone in this one. 

8k words, smut, angst, and really cheesy descriptions of love.

read part one here)

Y/N usually tried to focus on the positive. If she was going into an exam, she focused on how prepared she was, how cunning she could be. If she was going to a job interview she imagined clicking with the employer immediately and getting hired on the spot. Maybe it helped the most positive outcome happen, she didn't know. That said, the second they were wheels up she started thinking about plane crashes. Fiery ones.

This was a mistake. She was en route to New York to see Calum for the first time in months and it was such a mistake.

Y/N didn't like to fuck up in the same way twice, which is why she stayed friends with her exes if they wanted, but never more. She never entertained the thought. And Calum - he had ruined her, a little. Before she had him she had always felt fine spending time on her own, but it had been weeks and she couldn't even watch Netflix without thinking about how much better it had been with him next to her.

Sometimes she thought that even the time she had spent furious at him was felt better anything she could do alone. They had broken up for a reason, but that was hard to remember at times like this, when she felt restless for him. He always said that she helped keep him sane in his crazy stupid rockstar world - she was starting to think that he had done the same for her.

The man in the seat next to her had settled down for a nap as soon as the flight attendants had finished their speech. Y/N had been ignoring him, but now she turned towards him and pretended he was Calum. If they were still together, where would they be going together, on the edge of winter?

Well, for one, she would be in business class.

It's easy to joke about it, but Y/N knows what comes next. When she starts to think about Calum and her, she can't turn her brain off until it's done. It's probably unhealthy.

Really, if they were still together, he would have flown her out the second she had a break from school to wherever he was in the world. He’d send a car for her, probably, have a driver waiting for her with a sign with her name on it. Maybe a snack in the car if he was feeling really considerate. He’d probably have something set up in his hotel room for when she got there, fancy candles at least, and champagne, the cheap kind, the kind she likes. Maybe he’d be busy and come in later, but if he was there would be lingerie laid out, she's sure, or that sweater that she likes but didn't steal. And she'd put that on and nothing else and she'd wait for him, because she’d be in love.

Y/N tries to get through the next part quick, like ripping off a bandaid.

He’d kiss the taste of champagne out of her mouth and they’d fuck like rabbits and order room service and and talk and fuck like rabbits again until they tired each other out and it would be good, like the last time, like every time.

That's what would happen if they were still together.

But they're not.

Y/N is trying not to get her expectations up. For anything. She knows there's gonna be a big serious conversation, and she's dreading that, but other than that… Jesus, she doesn’t do this. She doesn’t even know what she wants from this. She’s gonna be lost and confused and aching in New York.

Calum better fucking buy her tickets to MoMA or she’s rioting.

The seatbelt sign flicks back on all too soon. Y/N wishes she lived a little further away from New York right now, so she had more time to sort through her thoughts. She’d been putting it off for days now, trying not to ask herself if she wants something with Calum again. Now she wishes she had, so she wouldn’t be suffering on the plane next to some guy from the midwest.

Unfortunately, the plane doesn’t crash, and Y/N’s only brought a carry on so she doesn’t get to stall at the baggage carousel. She texts Calum as soon as she touches down, because - fuck him, honestly - he had been determined to come and pick her up this time. Maybe that's a little harsh. It's not that she doesn't want to see Calum, she does, she loves just hanging out with him, it's just- she doesn't know what he wants from this, from her. That sounds stupid since he wrote and recorded a song about how he wants to get back together, but she can't help it. He said she didn't have to make any promises, just to come and see what happens. That makes it sound like he wants something to happen, just doesn't give her a clue about what. Like, does he just want to hook up, or does he want to make it “official” and post about her on Instagram?

The thing is, she doesn’t know if anything’s changed since the last time. She’s still guarded. He is, too. He’s still living like a rockstar. She’s still living like a student. They’re both busy, and it frustrated them both so much when they didn’t get the time they wanted together, and then they’d rub each other raw and then they’d argue and then they’d fight, say things they didn’t mean.

And if that had been it, the breakup would have stuck and she wouldn’t be finding her way through Arrivals at JFK.

Here’s the thing, though; it had been wonderful. When they were good they were so, so good, like nothing she’d ever felt before. Holding Calum’s full attention was almost overwhelming. When he focused on you you felt it, like the sun on your skin, but it was all just coming from one golden boy. Y/N had never met someone who could make her feel like that. And yeah, they were both trying to protect themselves, but even guarded he was such a giver. He knew he was lucky, he had so much, and whenever she let him he’d share it with her. It had meant a lot to the both of them. They’d both said some pretty awful things to each other after a late night. Every time, though, Calum would give her these beautiful fucking apologies that made her feel human again. Y/N is a little scared that she won’t be able to feel whole in a relationship without that pretty chaos, just because of how good it felt to have him speak tenderly to her after a fight.

Still, Y/N needs to focus. “Can there be love without pain” is a question for some pretentious philosopher, not for her, and anyway if she’s not careful she’s gonna walk right on to a plane to El Salvador.

She had texted Calum as soon as they landed, to let him know she was making her way out, and now he texts her telling her where the car is waiting. It feels weird, to be talking to him again like nothing ever happened. For weeks she moved through the world itching to tell him about her day, and now that she has the chance she’s paralyzed, somehow. She’s making the effort, though; as she fights her way through the airport she sends him the lady across from me ob the plane took off her soes AND socks as soon as we took off im dying with one hand.

The car is a black Audi, and Y/N finds it after a few seconds standing in the grey New York afternoon. She tosses her carry on into the trunk (she doesn’t blame Calum for not wanting to come out) and takes a deep breath.

She opens the door to the backseat and sees him, and the rush of relief nearly kills her. When she goes to sit down on her side of the car, she’s already reaching out, and Calum catches hold of her and tugs her across the seats into his arms.

Fuck, she missed him.

“Hi,” she says.

She feels him press his face into her hair. “Hi,” he mumbles.

The car starts moving, and she pulls away to put her seatbelt on. She has to slide over so she’s not sitting in the middle. That would be weird, right? Adults don’t usually sit in the middle seat, no matter who their ex is.

Y/N has to stop overthinking this stuff.

“So. You ’n the boys seem like you’re doing well.” She says, smiling. She’s a little proud of them, even though she’s got no claim on ‘em anymore.

Calum ducks his head. “Yeah, the new single, it’s- we’re all really happy about it.”

“Well, you’re welcome.” She teases.

“Oh, right, yes, thank you for breaking my heart, very kind of you. How can ever I repay you, sweetheart?”

Y/N wants to pretend she doesn’t feel warm inside when he calls her that, but her toes curl in her shoes. “Well, a muffin basket would be a start.”

They’re both smiling at each other, and Y/N knows if things weren’t so fucking weird he would have kissed her.

He doesn’t, though.

Calum doesn’t talk much on the way to the hotel, asking her about herself and her classes as much as possible. It’s probably all the interviews he’s in, eventually all the questions feel the same, she’s sure. It can be hard to get him to talk.

It feels nice, though. Some parts of her want him back in her life, you know?

There’s only so much you can say about college, though, and as they get closer to the hotel they get back on even footing. “I haven’t been in New York since I was like, twelve. What are the cool spots? Is it still hip to go to the M&M's factory?” She asks as they start to stall in traffic. She’s not sure if she believes in that whole ‘crazy New York energy’ thing, but she does find anticipation rising in her as they get deeper into the city.

“I was gonna ask you what you wanted to do, actually. Like, we can do those touristy things if you want, I don’t mind. There’s a place that does this Macbeth show, it’s a hotel, and I know you like that shit, but if you want we can-”

Calum looks a little worried all of a sudden, so Y/N cuts him off. “Hey, I’m here for like a week, we’ll figure something out. Don’t stress. I’ve had like seventeen midterms in the last three days, so that plane ride was like a vacation in itself, my man.”

Calum smiles at that, but it’s not bright, not usual. “‘My man’? ‘S that where we’re at?”

Oh good. Relationship talks. Y/N had been really worried they wouldn’t get to that. Not that she wanted to ignore it, but- fuck. “I dunno. I haven’t seen you for a really long time, I don’t want to get ahead of myself.” She says finally, glancing at the Uber driver. Is Calum famous enough for it to be worth their while to tell a magazine about what they’re saying? Is that a thing?

“Yeah, no, I understand. It doesn’t - like, you’d tell me if me callin’ you sweetheart and all was bothering you, right?”

Calum’s literally a rockstar, he’s a confident fucking guy, but they’re both edgy all of a sudden. It’s like the first time they dated, only about a hundred times worse; instead of waiting to be kissed she thinks they’re both waiting for both their hearts to be broken. Y/N has to try to fix this (she fucked things up the first time around, it’s only fair), so she makes a joke. It’s what she does. “Oh, Calum, if it was bothering me I would be in another Uber right now. I actually would have called an Uber to this Uber and like - on the bridge, I would have jumped to the other car - it would have looked really badass.”

Calum laughs politely, and she can breathe easier, but things still feel out of alignment.

It doesn’t take too long for them to get to the hotel after that. Calum directs the driver to the back door, by the dumpsters. He beats her to the trunk, grabbing her bag before she gets the chance. “I can get it.” She insists, but he’s already got it slung over his shoulder. “You haven’t seen me for ages, I’m really buff now.”

“I know you can, ‘m just not gonna let you.” Calum says, distinctly smug.

Y/N does her best pout, but here’s the deal; she goes fucking weak at the knees when Calum takes care of her. “You’re a tyrant.” She says, following him up a set of stairs, where he unlocks a door.

“That’s right.” Calum waits for her to get inside and for the door to close behind her before he hip-checks her. It’s very considerate of him.

Maybe she should have thought about this before, but oh, shit. Where is she supposed to sleep?

Calum leads her into an elevator and presses a button for a very high floor, so her ears almost pop as they ascend. But they didn’t stop by the front desk, which means she’s staying in Calum’s room, and she’s willing to bet good money that it’s not a double.

And if she’s honest, she knows some guilty part of her is desperate for his touch again. She hadn’t expected to be back in her ex-boyfriend’s bed so soon, is all.

It’s like Calum can read her mind as he unlocks the door. “There’s only the one bed, but I cleared out one of the drawers if you want to unpack. I was hoping-” He drops his keys on the table, her bag on the floor, and turns to her. “I was hoping we could share. I know we’re - we’re broken up, but I think I sleep better with you next to me.”

Y/N wants to sleep with Calum again. That’s not the issue. If it was just about being in his arms, curling up on his chest and letting him keep her warm, then fuck, yeah, she would already be in her pjs. She just doesn’t want to walk into something that destroys her, and she thinks if she gets back into the same mess she had with him she’ll get cut to ribbons by their sharp edges. “I-” She starts, and then she stops herself. She wants to do this right. “We should have our weird relationship talk first. Right? I like you, Calum, you know I do, but I can’t- we can’t hurt each other again, you know?”

“Yeah,” Calum says, too quickly. “Yeah, of course. You want me to order room service first, or-”

Y/N didn’t get much of a lunch on the plane, but all of a sudden she’s got no appetite. “Not for me, thanks.”

“Alright.” Calum says, shifting his weight. He leads Y/N into the living room, gestures for her to sit on the couch. She goes for the armrest, and he stays standing, running a hand through his hair. Even their positioning is awkward.

“I-”

“The thing is-”

They both stop.

“You first.” Y/N says, thinking she's being polite, but Calum shakes his head.

“You know how I feel.”

I know you know I will never get over you

Y/N licks her lips. “Fair enough.” She agrees. Fuck. She thought of a million ways to say this since their phone call, but now that he's here- she doesn't want to hurt him, and that's all she really knows. “Obviously, I'm here in New York, I want to see you. I miss you. And I think I still have-” She can't say she still has feelings for him. It's too ugly, too cliché. “-um, I miss you.” She repeats instead. Calum doesn't move. “But when we broke up it was the right thing to do, you know? We hurt each other a lot. And I don't know if I’ve changed.”

“I mean, you said you got super buff, so...” Calum grins, though it looks stiff.

Y/N laughs a little, just for him. “I'm super buff now, I could bench press a car, but I don't know if I can do long distance right. You know? It’s not- Cal, it's not a hard no,” she says quickly, because he looks agonized. Well, and she means it. “I just don't know what's different. I can’t go through that again.”

Calum is quiet for a long moment, which makes Y/N feel even worse. Is this whole week gonna be like this? “I get it.” He says, after a long moment.

Something inside Y/N breaks. She had hoped that Calum had met her here with a plan (or at least some really expensive lingerie) to get her back, to make them work. Songs can make empty promises, after all, and that's what she had been scared of - that he’d say that he’d do anything for her and then do anything but change. She misses him, enough to say it out loud, misses his touch and his laugh and that goofy fucking smile you have to earn from him. If he decides there’s no hope for them, is he gonna kick her out? Of his life, or- oh, shit, of his suite. He wouldn’t, she knows, but she doesn’t really have the money right now to stay-

“I read Macbeth.”

Y/N’s head jerks up from where she was staring at the carpet. “What?”

“I, uh, read Macbeth. The whole thing. And Einstein’s Dreams, you know- ‘bout a month or two ago I went through all our conversations and I read all the articles and books you said I should read but I didn't. I should have told you-”

“I knew you weren't reading those. It's okay, really.” Y/N says. She's not mad. She had been mad about it when they broke up, but now it's just shitty and she's over it. Their relationship didn't fall apart because he wasn't reading enough Shakespeare, that was for sure.

Calum smiles stiffly. “No, it's not. Those were good books, but when I was trying to read them they reminded me how smart and… and dimensional you are. I think, while we were together, I let myself forget. I should have been better to you. Y/N, I was falling in love with you, and I hate myself because I didn’t show you. I let you walk away.”

Her heart spasms, but he looks so sad when he says it. She can’t let that happen. “We both made mistakes-” Y/N starts.

“No.” Calum says, stepping forwards to stop her. “No. I mean, you said some mean shit, but only after I ignored you and brushed you off for weeks. I deserved it. Most of what you said was true, anyway, I was bein’ a- what was it you said? A bratty little shithead.” Y/N isn't proud of that. “Anyway, it was true. We had some bad fucking days, and the make-up sex was fun and all, but I’m willing to give that up to have you stay in my life.”

“You’re a martyr.” Y/N can’t help but tease. What he said in the car comes back to her; did she really break his heart? Calum looks miserable, even though he smiles at her joke.

“Yeah, well,” he says. “I think I was scared, before. I am- I was falling in love with you, and I didn’t want - well,” he gestures at their positions. She’s still sitting on the armrest like a bird on a wire, he’s just within arm’s reach. It’s a terrible distance.

She hadn’t wanted this, either.

Calum runs a hand through his hair and takes a deep breath before he continues. “I think maybe that’s why I was so shitty. I know that’s not an excuse,” He says, before she can say anything. “I’m trying to be better. I am. I want to read the books you’re passionate about and listen to the music you love and kiss you on the cheek in every picture we’re in. I just- tell me what I have to do for you to give me another chance.”

So that’s it. The ball is all the way in her court.

Y/N looks up at him for a long moment.

She knows what she wants. If love is like the ocean, she would choose to drown for him. She wants him back again. It seems simple, when she puts it that way, frames it as what she wants. But she was always the sensible one. She won’t let herself hurt him like that again. She doesn’t want to break his heart - not more than she already has.

“Let’s just- let’s just have this week.” She says, carefully. Like the ceiling might cave in. “Seven days can be a long time. Let’s just do what we want for one fucking week and see where it leaves us at the end. I- Calum, I’m bad at this, but you know… you know what you mean to me. Love is a verb, you know? Let’s just do what feels right. And I’m not trying to say I -” She rushes to add (she didn’t miss the way his body jolted) “-like, you know, the “L” word, I know that it’s not the time. I just-”

“Does that mean I can kiss you?”

Y/N blinks. Stands. “Yes.”

She had braced herself for him to kiss her like a starving man, but he reaches out and cups her face in both hands, fingers cool and dry. He keeps his eyes open as he leans in, searching hers until they’re too close to see anything.

Then their lips meet like sun meets rain.

Calum kisses her like slowly as she winds her fingers into his hair, like she’s made of glass, like she’s made of sugar. He doesn’t move his hands until she pulls her own body closer to his, and then he feels his way to her waist to keep her there. The gentle drag of their open mouths floods her body with warmth for what feels like the first time in fucking weeks.

It must not be long before they pull apart, but Y/N feels breathless.

“I missed you so fucking much.” Calum says, and this time when he pulls her in there’s real heat behind it. His tongue presses into her mouth with intent, and for once she lets him direct the kiss to show her just how goddamn much he missed her. She wants this so much her body aches when he pulls away again. “I’m gonna be so good to you, promise, I-”

Y/N cuts him off with her mouth on his. Promises make her nervous, but more importantly, Calum kisses like he did before they split and she missed that. It feels like she’s blushing over her whole body - almost like a kid, only there’s nothing innocent about what she wants to do with him.

Maybe she shouldn’t, but… all they have is a week. Maybe not even that. And fuck it, she wants to do love.

She stands on her tiptoes, pressing a little harder against him. She wants to direct this, but Calum pulls away again. He’s panting. They both are.

“We can start over, baby.” He says. “I’m just- I’m so happy to have you back.”

He’s still cupping her face, but he doesn’t pull her back in, and she takes that chance to speak. “We can’t do that.” She says, but she has to hurry to continue because she sees the fear that flashes across Calum’s face. “I mean- if we start over this is technically our first date, and I don’t fuck on the first date.”

She grins, but Calum doesn’t. All of a sudden he’s unreadable. Did she say something wrong? Already? She can feel his grip change on her hips, like he’s thinking about letting go. Her fingers relax in his hair, in case he pulls away, so she doesn’t hurt him-

He tosses her over his shoulder before she knows what’s happening, and then she is gleefully upside-down with his hand on her ass keeping her steady. She can see her bag on the bedroom floor as they pass by it, anticipation rising in her stomach.

God, she was trying to be cool, but he is so, so, so sexy she could spontaneously combust.

She only has a moment to take it in before he stops, and then she’s head-over-heels again until her back hits the bed. Before she can get her bearings back, Calum’s climbed his way back on top of her and is brushing the hair out of the way for another kiss. He’s not shy; there’s no air between them, his chest pressed hard against hers. One elbow is planted by her head, holding him up, and the other is running down her ribs, pawing at the hem of her shirt. She can feel him smiling against her lips before he pulls away. “You couldn’t wait five fucking minutes, could you?” He says, but she can hear that he’s teasing and anyway the way he’s trying to ease her shirt off says more than enough.

His lips go to her neck, so she can feel his stubble as he lays kisses down, looking for a weak spot. “I’m sorry, did you carry me to your bed like a caveman for something else? You didn’t wait five seconds.” She jokes. Her breath hitches as he moves a little lower, closer to her collarbone. He always finds those spots. It would be a curse if it didn’t feel so good.

Calum knows it, too. “What did you say?” When she starts to respond he bites down, just enough to make her squirm and snap her mouth shut before she can fucking squeal. He’s still playful, she can feel his lips moving against her skin when he says, “Sorry, didn’t catch that.”

“Shut up,” she manages, and swats him on the shoulder.

He catches her wrist as she draws back, and pins it to the bed right next to her head. She doesn’t miss the way the muscles in his arm flex to hold her down.They're both breathing shallowly; Calum’s close enough that she can feel his chest rise and fall just like hers. Y/N feels a little lightheaded, all of a sudden. When he leans in and kisses her again, it's less playful, there's real heat behind it. He kisses her deeper, and she parts her lips to let him, this time. He draws back, and rest his forehead against hers. They're close enough that their breath mingles between them.

They've both still got their clothes on, but this feels like the most intimate she's ever been with Calum. Neither of them speak for a long moment. His brown eyes lock with hers, and he is beautiful but she feels that gaze low in her belly. One of his hand is still on her ribs, but he's not pawing at her shirt anymore, just smoothing his thumb over her side like he can't stop touching her. She wants to kiss him again, but she can't bring herself to ruin this moment.

Eventually Calum huffs out a breath - was that a sigh? - and lets go of her wrist to haul her shirt over her head with both hands. Immediately, Y/N’s hands go to her back to undo her bra clasp. Calum helps slip her bra off her arms and doesn't waste a second throwing it into some corner of the hotel room before he’s back on her, kissing along the side of her neck and down her chest. It feels /good/ as his steady hands find her breasts, grasping at them firm enough for her to really feel it. He’s still kissing a path downwards, pausing to unbuckle her belt. Y/N plants her feet and lets Cal drag her jeans and panties off, but it feels wrong, her being all undressed while he’s still wearing his t-shirt.

As soon as she sits up to tear that damn thing off him, Calum grabs her hands and laces them with his, pressing them down to the mattress. “Baby,” he murmurs, “I wanna focus on you, tonight, please. Let me show you how much I missed you.”

Calum's great in bed, she's not gonna deny it, but it's not what makes her quiet. He means that. He's an intense guy, but she's never seen his dark eyes like this, like he can see right through her. She has to take a deep breath.

“Please.” She says.

Calum grins at that, and lets go of her hands to press her thighs apart.

Y/N sits back on her elbows, because Calum eating her out is a hell of a view, but that's not what he does. Once he has her legs spread he starts to kiss the inside of her thigh, so fucking close to where she needs him. She thinks he's just trying to tease, but then he starts kissing with intent, nipping and sucking like he's… he's trying to mark her up. He'd never done that before, although whether it was from trying to avoid paps or just class she wasn't sure. But this- it feels good, to see him kissing on her like it was his last day on earth. It's just very new.

“Cal, what’re you-” She starts to ask, but before she can finish he pulls off of her leg and licks a big stripe up her pussy, right up the middle, and her brain goes a little fuzzy. She moans softly, to let him know it feels good and to please keep going, but he goes back to working on her leg, lifting her knee to get a better angle. His tongue sweeps over her skin in a way that would feel so damn good just a few inches away, but when she tries to shift to direct him over, he just holds her leg a little firmer. “Jesus, don’t tease.”

Calum pulls away again and Y/N’s stomach swoops because his lips are glossy from playing with her. He almost looks smug. “From the way you’re dripping you don’t seem to mind, angel.” He says, and Y/N tries to look unaffected but she knows it’s not working. “I’m gonna make you feel so fucking good, just let me take my time with you. Want every inch of you tonight. Trust me.” He adds.

Well, she’s not gonna argue with that.

Y/N goes back to resting on her elbows, toes curling in the sheets as Calum goes back to dragging his teeth over her thigh. The spot’s starting to get a warm little ache, but the way he looks at it when he pulls away goes all the way through her. It’s just for a second, but she feels his grip relax, like he doesn’t have to hold her so tight now that he’s got a mark on her. Maybe that’s exactly what he’s thinking, too. He presses a quick peck to the red spot, and reaches up to play with her nipple as a reward. /Nice/. She shifts a little in his grip, she can’t help it.

“You like that?” Calum grins.

“Fuck,” she moans, despite herself. His other hand is still holding her leg open for him and he’s so fucking close to where she needs him but he’s not biting. She knows from experience he wants her to beg, but she’s not ready to play, not quite yet. She might be lying back for him, but she can still do a little teasing of her own. “You got anything else planned?”

Calum smirks a little more at that, somehow, and lets go of her completely to sit back on his ankles. Y/N’s body shifts to follow him, unconsciously. “You know I do.” He says, pulling off his shirt. /Fuck/, was he always this built or was this new? His skin is intoxicating. “Like I said, I’m gonna take my time. You gonna be good for me?”

“Aren’t I always?”

Calum looks up briefly from where he’s undoing his belt. “No. That’s why I fell in love with you.”

Before she can even start to process that, he’s fumbled his belt off and presses in to kiss her, catching one of her hands in his and steadying her at the waist. “You know,” he gasps in between kisses, “‘thought so many times about what I was gonna do to you once I got you back, don’t even know where to start. So much I wanna do to you.” He laughs. “And with you, I guess. But right now-” He starts to kiss down her neck again, gently.

She doesn’t mean to say it, but- “I want you to fuck me.”

“Gimmie time, angel,” He smiles as he pulls away.

“No, now, please, Cal, I’m so ready for you.” Y/N urges, and when he pauses she runs his hand, in hers, down her body to where she’s warm and aching for him.

Calum’s eyebrows crease. Not a lot, but even in her haze she can tell. “Baby, wanna make you feel good first, get you-” As he lets go to feel her up, he presses two fingers inside her, easy. She’s soaking. She can feel it, and she sees in his face he can too. “...shit.”

“Please.” She says again, and Calum’s face goes a little soft. She knows he loves it when she goes all quiet and nice, just for him, and she’s glad because she doesn’t want to wait. She wants- twenty minutes ago she didn’t know what she wanted but now she knows she wants him in her, looking into her eyes, she wants to watch him cum and flop down next to her and smile and pull her back into his arms. She wants to do love. She wants it with him.

Calum kisses her once, quickly. “Whatever you want.” It sounds like a promise but it doesn’t scare her, not this time.

Pants. Socks. They’re gone in a second and Calum is ready, cock hardening in his hand as he fumbles for a condom the bedside table. Y/N sits up too as he find one, to help him roll it on.

Well, he couldn’t sit there looking so beautiful and serious about making love to her and expect her to keep her hands off him. He tries though, using one hand at her waist to lay her back down. “Missed you.” She says to his dick as her back hits the pillows, and Calum chuckles above her.

She tries not to feel like it’s life changing, as he lines himself up with her, but it is. He’s still smiling as he pushes into her, and she can see it change into something /else/ as he starts to bottom out. Y/N is suddenly overwhelmed with how lucky she is that this man, smart and great and terrible, he saves this for her. At the same time she can feel him filling her like he used to, and her fingernails dig into his shoulders. When he groans, he sounds like music.

Fuck.

They stay that way for a moment, like they’re locked together. Y/N cups his face with one hand. She likes the way her fingers look on his cheekbone, her thumb on his jaw, like maybe she could keep him this time if she held tight.

She really had missed him.

He starts to move and it’s like she’s come back to life. It’s winter outside but her body feels like spring, and she reaches for him. Even hikes one leg up around her waist, and moans as it sends heat crackling through her body. Calum’s forehead rests on hers again. His nose is crinkled up, eyes closed, and he’s doing this sweet little groan every time he bottoms out. It’s just as intoxicating as the songs he wrote her, getting to see him like this. Only him- only her- fuck.

She’s close. She doesn’t know how, but she can feel her orgasm building in the pit of her stomach. No one-night stand compares, no other ex. Calum’s arms seem to be everywhere, and the motion of him- “Fuck, Calum,” and she’s not proud on the way her voice breaks but he leans in to kiss her again so it’s worth it.

He shifts his body just a little and suddenly his motion brushes her clit and she feels that shit in her toes. “Shit, baby, there, there, there-” The only thing that stops her begging is that he starts to fuck into her harder. She has to focus on breathing; it’s like he’s fucking the air right out of her lungs. His pace is still slow, still steady, but he’s making sure she feels every inch of him.

Y/N’s not stupid, she knows saying “I love you” during sex doesn’t count. But this doesn’t feel like just sex.

It’s scary. But as Calum grabs her waist, bumping his lips with hers, it feels right. Better. “So good, angel,” he says. Does he feel it, too?

The way he’s loving her is relentless. She’s starting to get close, record time, but as Calum suddenly stills and ducks his head down to kiss her, she can tell he’s almost there. She’s still cradling his face, and she gently tugs his lips away from hers. “Calum, I’m really close, I-”

“Don’t wanna wait, do you, baby?” He teases- or tries to. But he’s panting too hard for him to play cool.

She shakes her head. “Waited three months.” The weight and width of him isn’t enough; she’s about thirty seconds from trying to wrestle him over onto his back and taking over.

Calum huffs out a breath above her and smiles, ducking back down to kiss her. Yes. “You’re lucky you’re so pretty.” He says, but there’s no heat behind it. His eyes are crinkly as he kisses her quickly, and then while her eyes are still closed he tucks his face into the crook of her neck and starts to move again.

She always liked the way he’d hold to keep them close. Like two halves of a locket. This time, though, she’s practically got herself wrapped around him, with her leg around his waist, one hand in his hair, one hand on his bicep to keep anchored (and, wow, he has not been skipping arm day). He feels like fire around her, all warm skin and hot breath on her shoulder, and it’s kindling something inside her, too.

It’s like the unbearable tension of three months apart is threatening to overtake her, along with the beautiful ache of Calum inside her and the way he keeps brushing her clit with every stroke- it’s a lot, and Cal groans as she catches hold of his curls. She needs something to keep her steady. “Come on, baby,” he says, in between gasps of his own.

She’s close, she’s so, so close, and she hauls Calum’s head up by the hair and kisses him and closes her eyes and it hits her like a fucking tsunami. He keeps kissing her as her mouth falls open and she ruts her hips up into his, fast, and he speeds up in response- all she can do is feel the way his cock sends waves through her and hang on for dear life. With a groan, he pushes deep into her and stays there and she can feel him cumming, doing tiny little bucks of his hips that make her whimper as her own high starts to fade.

Eventually Calum settles in her arms, and she releases her hold on his hair. When she opens her eyes, he’s resting his forehead on hers, catching his breath.

He looks really fucking good like this.

He’s resting most of his weight on his elbows, but before she can untangle her leg from him he pulls her into his chest and rolls over so he’s on his back. His cock is still buried deep in her, and as she squirms a little he tosses a second arm around her. “Stay.” He murmurs, and although Y/N hadn’t been planning on going far she settles.

Calum looks fucked out, sweat beading like diamonds on his brow. His eyes are half open, like he’s gotta keep watch on her, but she wouldn’t have it any other way. All the hard, worried lines she had caused in his face have softened, and it feels like she might have done good by him for once.

...it had been really good sex, but maybe that was reading too much into it.

She tries to press herself up, to see him better, but as soon as Calum feels her movement he shakes his head. “You should save your energy, love.” His words rumble through his chest.

Y/N smiles. “You got big plans, Hood?”

“You didn’t let me take my time, remember?” He smiles back. She can hear it in his voice. “I’ve got a lot more to do to you before I let you out of this bed.”

She smiles at that. Fuck like rabbits, check. There’s still something bothering her, though. An aching in her inner thigh that won’t let her rest. “Cal?” She asks, after one more second of stillness. “Can I ask you why you had to make a love bite on my thigh?”

She can feel him tense up under her, and nerves pool in her stomach. Was that bad? They can’t have fucked this up already, can they? “I just… yeah. Um,” Calum starts, after a long second. “I realized after you left that I, uh, never got to leave any on you before and I needed to do it before I lost you again. I put it somewhere out of the way. Somewhere I’d be the only one to see it. Or… I don’t want to be jealous with you but if there’s someone else I want them to see it and know that there’s someone who…” Calum rushes. Y/N peeks up and sees that his eyes are shut tight, face aimed up at the ceiling. “...who cares so much for you.”

Y/N doesn’t know what to say. She presses a gentle kiss to Calum’s chest while she tries to think, but she can’t follow any of that up with sweet words. “‘M gonna leave a hickey on your dick.” She says, after a long moment, and Calum laughs underneath her.

It feels right.

“Is that even possible?”

“Only one way to find out.” Y/N grins. “Hey, if I suck your dick will you take me to the aquarium tomorrow?”

“Only one way to find out.” He says. “Just… in a minute, okay? Lemme hold you.”

Calum’s going soft inside her as she snuggles a little closer into his arms. The future’s unclear, but one thing’s for sure; it feels really fucking good to be back.

[kiddoryder]

Birthday Puppet

Hey guys! I wanted to say thank you for liking my first Hazbin Hotel fanfic and my OC. I really appreciate it!

 Anyway this new fanfic introduces my other Hazbin Hotel OC Lucius! The nephew of Sir Pentious, and it’s his birthday which is uncle got a special surprise for his nephew that don’t sit well for Charlie and the others.

 So relax and enjoyed the story! @vivziepop

 At a fancy Victorian Castle (Idk where he lives but I can picture it’s something fancy) Sir Pentious was ordering his Egg Bois to set up a party. They were in his stage room setting up the party and the egg Bois was working hard and fast.

 Sir Pentious - “Hurry up and set up those balloons!”

 All Egg Bois - “Yes boss!”

 Egg boi 21 - “Hey boss! What’s the party for anyway?”

 Sir Pentious angrily grabbed the egg boi with his tail. This made him and the other egg Bois scared and jealous that Pentious grabbed one of them.

 Sir Pentious - “Haven’t you been listening?! Today is my nephew’s Lucius birthday. This year his parents decided to let him to spend it with me. And this party gotta be perfect!”

 Sir Pentious then heard the door knocking.

 Sir Pentious - “He’s here!”

 Sir Pentious threw the egg boi away and quickly slithered to the door. He opened the door and there was his preteen nephew Lucius. Lucius looks similar to his Uncle, but he was more humanmade since he has legs. Lucius has gray hair, wearing a white shirt, a black tie, gray vest, black pants, and black shoes with white spats. He was also holding a book bag.

 Lucius - “Hello Uncle Pentious.”

 Sir Pentious - “Hello Lucius! Happy birthday my boy. Come in! Wait until I see what I got planned for you.”

 Sir Pentious came into the house and Sir Pentious lead him to the stage room. Lucius eyes widen in amazement at what his uncle plan for him.

 Luscious - “Oh Uncle this is amazing!”

 Sir Pentious - “Anything for my nephew.”

 Egg boi 8 - “Hello Lucius-“

 Lucius - “It’s YOUNG MASTER Lucius to you minion.”

 Egg boi 8 - “My apologizes Young Master Lucius but, didn’t you invite friends over to the party?”

 Lucius - *scoff* “Who need friends when I have minions? Besides, friendship disgust me.”

 Sir Pentious - “Your parents and I taught you well my boy.”

 Then all of a sudden, one of the egg Bois accidentally tripped and dropped a bowl of punch. The bowl of punch landed on Lucius wetting him and ran toward a mirror and saw that he was a wet sticky mess.

 Lucius - *angry* “IM UGLY!!”

 Egg boi 47 - *nervously* “Oopsie…”

 Then glass cups were being thrown at the egg Bois and Pentious. Some of the egg Bois got crushed to death.

 Egg boi 28 - “Hey!”

 Then more dangerous things like glass, forks and knives was being thrown. Pentious and the egg Bois hide behind big crates.

 Lucius - “YOU IDIOTS RUINED MY GOOD LOOKS!!”

 Lucius kept on throwing things which kept Pentious and the egg Bois still hiding.

 Sir Pentious - “Now look at what you idiots has done! You made him mad!”

 Egg boi 47 - “But I tripped while holding the punch.”

 Sir Pentious - “Well you shouldn’t have tripped!”

 A sharp knife was thrown through the crates and it killed an Egg Boi.

 Egg Bois and Pentious - “AHHH!”

 Looking for something else to throw, Lucius went inside his bag and picks up a doll. However it wasn’t just a doll, it was a raggedy Sonya/Liz doll he made. Lucius then looked at the doll, tears began to form in his eyes and began to sob and wail loudly while hugging the doll.

 Sir Pentious - “Go see what he is going now.”

 Egg boi 23 - *frighten* “But Boss, I’m scared.”

 Sir Pentious - “NOW!!”

 Egg boi 23 timidly looked up and saw Lucius crying while hugging his doll.

 Egg boi 23 - “The young master Lucius is crying Boss.”

 Pentious looked up and saw Lucius crying while hugging his doll.

 Pentious - *concern* “Why are you crying Lucius?”

 Lucius - *through his tears* “Now the girl of my dreams will never love me like this! She even rejected my invitation to my party...I even called her my property!”

 Lucius just broke down into sobs again. It just breaks his Uncle’s heart to see him so sad. Especially on his birthday.

 Sir Pentious - “Don’t worry Lucius your birthday will still be great! *sinister* and I already know the perfect gift!

 ()()()()()()()()

 Meanwhile Sonya was there spending time with Charlie and the others at the hotel. There was a knock on the door and Sonya opened it. It was an Egg Boi with a letter in his hands.

Egg Boi 19  - “Good morning my good lady. Sir Pentious would like you to come to-“

Sonya grabbed the letter, kicked the Egg Boi far away, and close the door.

 Charlie - “Who was it, Sonya?” Sonya “Some talking egg thing who gave me some weird letter.”

 Sonya - *reads it* “Come to my party my lovely property from Lucius" Augh! Does anybody got a lighter?” Angel Dust hands her a lighter and she burn the letter. Then she crumbled the envelope and threw it in the trash.

 Vaggie - “What’s wrong Sonya? Who’s Lucius?”

 Sonya - “He's a boy who have a crush on me.”

 Charlie - “Aw! That is so cute!”

 Sonya - “No it’s not cute! It’s disgusting especially with him.”

 Vaggie - “Aw come on he can’t be that bad.”

 Sonya - “He’s Sir Pentious’ nephew.”

 Vaggie - “On second thought maybe him having a crush on you is really bad.”

 Angel - “So wait, Sir Pentious’ brat have a crush on you?”

 Sonya - “Yeah that what I said.”

 Angel then burst into laughter much to the confusion of Charlie, and the anger of Sonya and Vaggie. Husk was just drinking his alcohol not caring and Nifty was busy cleaning.

 Sonya - *crossing her arms* “And what is so funny?”

 Angel - *laughing* “Sir Pentious’s brat having a crush on you! *laughing*

 Sonya - *mad* “Angel it’s not funny!”

 Angel - “Oh yeah you’re right it’s not funny...It’s fucking hilarious!! *laughs more*

 Vaggie- “Angel stop it, or I’ll knock you out!”

 Angel - *laughing dying down* “Okay okay. You gals have no sense of humor.”

 Sonya - “Well it’s not funny to be always get kidnapped by a slithering asshole.”

 Charlie - *shocked* “Wait he kidnapped you?! Why didn’t you tell me? I mean if that the case we gotta lock up the hotel and-“

 Sonya - “Ah Cousin Charlie don’t worry about it.”

 Charlie - “What? But he come and kidnapped you and-“

 Sonya - “Oh please he’s always tries to kidnap me. Do you know how many times I been bag snagged, locked in a suitcase and chained up? So much to the point that this rate, I can escape blindfolded. Oh he forgot to blindfold me that time.”

 Angel - “Wow that’s really impressive kid.”

 Sonya - “Yeah but it’s really stressful too at the same time. He just likes me for my looks and want me to be a “proper lady” and follow the “woman code” basically being a stereotype of a girl: wearing dresses, looking pretty, doing housework. Bleugh! So stressful… *sat down on a bar chair and turn to Husk* hey buddy, what drink you recommended?”

 Husk - “Hold up let me see. *give her a liquor bottle* here you go.”

 Sonya - “Thanks.”

 Sonya was about to take a sip until Charlie grabbed the bottle.

 Charlie - “Sonya are you nuts?! You don’t drink liquor! That’s for depression. You drink red wine for stress.”

 Charlie hands her a glass of red wine. Sonya began to drink the wine and feel a little calmer.

 Charlie - “Okay so Lucius have some obsession issues, but have you try talking to him about it?”

 Sonya - “Yeah. The first time I let down gently, he did this!”

 Sonya lift up her shirt a little to show a stab wound scar above her belly button.

 Vaggie - *shocked* “He stabbed you?!”

 Sonya - “Yeah saying that he ‘freaked out’.”

 Charlie - “Sonya why didn’t you tell me or anybody else?”

 Sonya - “Because like I said Cousin Charlie, I can take care of myself. I mean he is related to Sir Pentious after all and failure do run in their family. Besides, stuff like stabbing and killing happen in Hell all the time it’s not much of a big deal.”

 Angel - “Sonya does get a good point Charlie. Somebody could get run over and nobody would care.”

 Charlie - “Okay that is fair...but still though!”

 Sonya - “Hey don’t worry Cousin Charlie, if I really needed help, I will call you.”

 Charlie - “Promise?”

 Sonya - “I promise. *drinks more wine* But I can take care of myself *starting to sound mad and stress* to that no good Victorian bastard son of a bitch. I’ll-“

 Unknowingly to Sonya, she was also shaking in rage. It got so bad to point that she crushed the cup in her hands and the wine splatter on her clothes and face.

 Sonya - “Damn it! Excuse me I gotta go change now.”

 Sonya went upstairs to her own hotel room. Then after she finished changing in the bathroom, she heard a strange noise. Sonya started to look around her room.

Sonya - “Hello? Anybody there?”

 Suddenly, Sir Pentious slithered into the room. Sir Pentious - “Hello my dear.” Before Sonya could scream or fight back, Sir Pentious took out a white rag that has his venom and covered Sonya’s mouth and nose with it that  knocked her out. Sir Pentious evilly smiled and slung her over his shoulder and quietly open the window, and saw the latter connected to his blimp. He grabbed the latter and flew away without being noticed.

 Sir Pentious came back to his house still holding Sonya over his shoulder. The Egg Bois saw their boss stage back carrying Sonya.

 Egg Boi 666 - “Wow boss! You got the girl!”

 Egg Boi 15 - “Should I get Young Master Lucius boss?”

 Sir Pentious - “Of course not! I want this to be a surprise for him. The question is: what to do with her? Hmm…”

 Sir Pentious sees wooden board, paints, hooks and a big pink frilly dress. Even saw some of the egg Bois either playing with them or getting themselves killed. Pentious - “Hmm I got an idea!”

 ()()()()()()()()()

 Back at the hotel, Angel Dust was just flipping channels on the television drinking liquor, Vaggie was reading a book and was drinking beer, and Charlie came into the lobby looking worried.

Charlie - “Hey guys, have Sonya came down at all?”

 Angel Dust - “Nope.”

 Vaggie - “No why?”

 Charlie - “It’s been half an hour and she haven’t calm down at all.”

 Vaggie - “Maybe she just wants to have a little alone time.”

 Angel Dust - “Alone time? Isn’t she a little too young for that I mean once you start watching those type of movies, you can’t stop and-“?

 Vaggie - *shocked* “NOT that kind of alone time you idiot!”

 Angel Dust - “Well be clearer next time!”

 Vaggie - *rolled her eyes* “Anyway, she’s probably in her room reading or listening to music.”

 Charlie - “That’s true. Maybe I’m overreacting...Hey Husk can I have some vodka?”

 Husk threw her a vodka bottle and Charlie caught it. Charlie sat on the couch with Angel and Vaggie to watch TV. The TV turned static for a few seconds until it shows Sir Pentious fiddling with the camera.

 Sir Pentious - “Is it on?”

 Egg Boi 52 - “Yeah boss! We are on TV now! *he waves at the camera* Hi people!”

 Sir Pentious was annoyed and pushed the Egg Boi out of the way.

 Sir Pentious - “Greetings you pathetic sinners! It is I your future ruler: Sir Pentious!”

 Angel Dust - *deadpan* “Oh joy it’s Sir Penny on TV.”

 Charlie - “Let see what’s his so called “plans” this time to take over Hell this time.”

 Vaggie - “I bet it’s something really stupid like most of his other plans are.”

 Sir Pentious - You see, I prepared something very special for my nephew Lucius who *The egg boi was moving the camera down but Pentious made it go back up* HOLD IT STILL! Anyway, I prepared something very special for my dear nephew Lucius whose birthday is today!”

 The Egg Boi turned the camera to Lucius. He was now cleaned up but still looked bummed out. He was hearing a party crown and sadly blew a birthday blower. Then an Egg Boi tapped Sir Pentious’ arm and whispered:

 Egg Boi 12 - *whispered*  “She’s awake now Boss!”

 Sir Pentious - “Oh perfect! Oh Lucius come over here, I got a surprise for you.”

Lucius went next to his uncle and saw lots of buttons and levers and a small button remote. Sir Pentious presses a button on the table, and the curtain stage opens to reveal wooden fake animals, trees, and the backdrop was the forest. Angel, Charlie and Vaggie looked confused on what Sir Pentious was doing on TV.

 Charlie - “Really a puppet show?”

 Vaggie - “I guess he lost his touch.”

 Angel Dust - “Forget his touch, he lost his fucking brain. With all those extra eyes you'd think he'd see just how stupid that is.”

 Charlie chuckled at that statement as she, Vaggie and Angel Dust continue to drink their alcohol.

 Charlie - “I wish Sonya was down here to watch it with us.”

 Vaggie - “Maybe she’s watching it in her room. You did put the TV in there for a reason.”

 Charlie - “Good point.”

Lucius - “A puppet show? You made me a puppet show? Well I guess that is pretty cool since your puppet shows always entertain me.”

Sir Pentious - “Thank you. But this isn’t just any puppet show for you my boy, I happened to have gotten a very special for "puppet" for you!”

The Egg Boi turned the camera to the stage and Sir Pentious pressed a button on the table. The stage lights went on and Sonya came down the stage. Two hooks were impaled into both her hands which made her float and her hands bleed. Sonya was wearing a pink Victorian dress with white socks and Mary Jane shoes. She was also wearing a white headband with a feather on it with her hair loose. Sonya was fully awake but looked confused and a little in pain. Lucius gasps happily while Charlie, Vaggie and Angel Dust spit out their drink in shock.

 Lucius - *happily* “I-Is That!!”

 Charlie, Vaggie and Angel Dust - *shocked and horrified* “SONYA?!”

 Sonya - “What the hell? Where am I? And where are my clothes!?”

 Pentious - “Oh I burnt them and gave you a brand new pretty one!”

 Sonya - *mad* “You burnt my clothes?!”

 Pentious - “Oh yes cause a young lady such as yourself shouldn’t being wearing such horrid clothes.”

 Lucius - “Uncle, you did this for me?”

 Sir Pentious - “Well of course. You deserved something special for your birthday. What's more special than your own property? Beside I-“

 Sonya - *shocked* “What?! I'm nobody prop-“

 Angry that he got interrupted, Sir Pentious pressed the button he had on the remote and the hooks and chains glows light blue and end up electrifying  Sonya and she screamed in pain.

 Sonya - *panting* W-what the hell was that?!”

Sir Pentious - “Oh it’s something I added to the hooks and chains. I just to press this button on the remote that can make me shock you as much as I want! It would teach you some matters to becoming a proper lady for Lucius. The pain helps you learn.”

 Lucius - “And we will make sure that other self of yours would be a proper lady too. Excellent idea for making the hooks not reach her fingers Uncle. We can’t let that wild side of her come out you know?”

 Sir Pentious - “Agreed. Although perhaps once Sonya becomes a proper lady, the other side of her would be even more proper.”

 Sonya - *angry* “When I get down here, I'm gonna-“

Then all of a sudden, Sir Pentious use his tail and wrapped it around Sonya’s neck beginning to choke her. He even grabbed her cheeks and began to sink his nails into it.

 Sir Pentious - "Oh I'm sorry what was that you said missy? You said: *sinisterly* I'm going to make Lucius happy by being his puppet because if you don’t, I would kill you by squeezing you until your lungs pop?" Sonya - *while being choked* “S-Stop!”

Sir Pentious - “That's what I thought.”

 Sir Pentious let go of Sonya and she was now panting from being choked. Even though she couldn’t see it, she felt small drops of blood fell off her cheeks.

 Lucius - “Oh Uncle, you've made me the happiest boy in Hell!”

He hugs his uncle and The Egg Bois awed. The Egg Boi that was the camera then turned to Sonya. Sonya was panting in pain and saw the camera turned to her.

 Sonya - “Oh god I don't normally say this but: *desperately* SOMEBODY HELP ME!!!”

 Sir Pentious - *takes the video camera away* “What you doing to stupid fetus? Don’t record that! *looks at the camera* Lucius! How do I turn this thing off?”

 Lucius - “You need to rotate the zoom ring to off in order to turn the camera off.”

 Pentious - *confused* “Huh? Where is this thing you call zoom ring?”

 Lucius - *takes the camera* “Let me do it!”

 Sonya - “You better let me go now-“

 Sir Pentious pressed the button that shocked her and screamed in pain. Lucius then turn off the camera which made the TV goes back to its regular channel.

 Charlie - “Hold on Sonya I’m coming!”

 Charlie was about to run out the door until Vaggie stopped her.

 Vaggie - “Wait Charlie, we can’t just go yet.”

 Charlie - “But you saw what happened on the TV!

We need to save her!”

 Vaggie - “I know but we don't know where the party is. It could be anywhere for all we know.”

 “I figured out where.”

 They all turned to Niffty and saw she was holding a crumpled envelope.

 Niffty - “I saw it on the TV too and I remember Sonya having this and throwing it out. The top left should say his address.”

 Niffty took the paper, straighten out and the address. They all looked at the crumpled envelope and said an address that said, “Nightmare Boulevard 11001”.

 Charlie - “Excellent work Niffty let’s get going!”

 They all ran to Charlie’s limo and surprisingly, Charlie got into the driver’s seat and began to drive fast.

 Charlie - “Don't worry baby cousin, Charlie is coming!”

 ()()()()()()()

 Meanwhile back at the party Sir Pentious, Lucius, and the egg Bois was laughing being entertain by the “puppet show”. They were” controlling the chains to move Sonya’s arms around and two extra robot arms to move her legs to make her dance. Sonya never felt such anger and pain in her life and wanted nothing more to be free and beat the living crap of them. Sadly she couldn’t due to the hooks being deep impales in her hands and keep on getting shocked. Even if it she wasn’t getting shock, she would be banged against the wall, the floor, or even the lights. Sonya couldn’t even let out Liz due to her fingers can’t reach the ends and all Liz could do is sadly watch seeing her other self-getting tortured.

 Sonya - “Let me go your Victorian asshole!”

 Sir Pentious shocks her and Sonya screamed in pain.

Sir Pentious - “Ah ah ah. That's no way to speak to me or my nephew, especially on his birthday.”

 Lucius - “Come on my lovely Sonya where's your passion?”

 Sonya - *angry and sarcastic* “Oh, you mean beneath my rage and fury?”

 Sir Pentious - “Aw you just can’t handle the fact that I'm just simply having some fun with my dear nephew.”

 Egg Boi 91 - “And us too!”

 Sir Pentious slapped the Egg Boi away in annoyed.

 Lucius - “Yes I mean my property Sonya.” Sonya - “No I'm not! You always try to kidnap me!”

 Lucius - “Because I want you with me, forever!”

 Pentious - “Okay enough chit chat. How about a little puppet show!”

 Egg Boi 12 - “Oh boy!”

 Lucius - “Oooh, I'd love that.”

 Then Charlie, Angel Dust, and Vaggie sneak into the castle and saw the party room. It was actually pretty easy since the guards were eggs Bois and they quickly killed them. Then they  quietly sneak into the party room and hide behind the chairs and they saw on stage the curtain opening.

Sir Pentious - “Once Upon of time, there was some weakling pathetic girl name Sonya.”

He pressed the button and Sonya came down looking angry and in pain.

 Sonya - “I'm not part of this!!”

 Sir Pentious pressed the button and Sonya got shocked again.  

 Sir Pentious - “The pain help you learn.”

 Sonya - “The pain is melting my brain!”

 Sir Pentious - “Anyway, Sonya was really lonely and pathetic. She would always say: Sonya - “FUCK YOU!!”

 Egg Boi 25 - *gasps* “What such language!!”

 Lucius - “May I uncle?”

Sir Pentious -  “Oh, how could I say no to the birthday boy?” Sir Pentious gave Lucius the remote and Lucius presses the button two times and it shocks Sonya twice. Sonya screamed in pain much to the horror of Charlie, Vaggie and Angel Dust. Even a jerk like Angel Dust was even horrified and disgusted on what Sir Pentious and Lucius was doing to Sonya.

 Charlie - “This is horrible!”

 Vaggie - “Wait until I get ahold of that brat! I'll give him the biggest birthday beating of a lifetime!”

 Angel - “Yeah! Can’t we just shoot them?”

 Charlie - “No you can’t! We could get caught and they could kill Sonya.”

 Angel - “So what else you suggest we-“

 Vaggie - “Shh! Something happening.”

 They turned and heard Lucius saying:

 Lucius - “Uncle I’m starting to get famished. Is it okay we have some birthday cake?”

 Sir Pentious - “Why of course Lucius. Come on you chicken shits it’s time for cake!”

 Egg Bois - “Yes Boss!”

 Sonya - “Wait! Can’t I at least eat some cake? I mean isn’t it the “women code” ladies first?”

 Lucius - “Well Yes you are correct about that. But it’s my birthday and I get what I want! You get to eat later.”

 Sir Pentious - “Oh and one more thing:”

 Sir Pentious pressed a different button. Instead of getting shocked, two small hands appeared from the side of the headbands and it stretched Sonya’s mouth into a force smile.

 Sir Pentious - “This helps you smile. Don’t worry once your mind is clean from our training, you will be the proper lady you meant to be for Lucius. Remember, the pain helps you learn.”

 Sir Pentious laughs as he left the room. Sonya was panting in pain and felt like crying. She never felt this kind of torture before especially from Sir Pentious and Lucius. Liz came in shadow form came and looked at Sonya sadly because she can’t help. Sonya noticed Liz’s and tried to say:

 Sonya - “It’s. Okay”

 Then two small knives were thrown that destroyed the two robotic arms. Sonya spit out the remain of the robotic arms and her mouth was free. Confused, Sonya looked and saw Charlie, Vaggie and Angel Dust coming toward her.

 Sonya - *gasps* “Guys!”

 Charlie - *whispers* “Shh! Don’t worry sweetie we will get you out. The question is how?”

 Angel Dust - “Don’t worry Princess I’ll already figure it out.”

 Angel Dust use his second pair of arms and grabbed Sonya’s ankles. Angel was about to pull, but Vaggie stopped him.  

 Vaggie - “Do you literally have shits for brains? Are you trying to cause more pain to Sonya?!”

 Angel - “Is there anything you suggest Vag-hag?”

 Sonya - “Look I-“

 Sir Pentious - “What’s going on in there?!”

 Thinking quickly, Angel opened the doors opened the floor of the stage and hide. Vaggie climbed up the pole where the lights, and Charlie saw a clown costume. Getting an idea, Charlie quickly put on the costume and close the stage curtains. Sir Pentious, Lucius, and the Egg Bois came back into the stage room and saw the stage clown and the “clown”.

 Charlie - *in a goofy voice* “Why hello there!”

 Lucius - “Who are you?”

 Charlie - “I’m uhh...Chuckles the clown! I’m here for the birthday boy party!”

 Sir Pentious - “Strange. I don’t recall ordering a clown unless it was stupid minions of mine! *facepalm* ugh! They are stupider than I imagine. Anyway, what kind of clown are you? *threateningly* because if you are one those molester clowns you better not lay a finger on my nephew!”

 Charlie - “Oh no no. I’m the happy clown that makes kids happy!”

 Charlie began to do a goofy weird dance on stage. This leave the Egg Bois entertain while left Sir Pentious and Lucius confuses. While that was happening, Vaggie crawled on the top pole where Sonya was hanging. She hanged upside down and gently grabbed Sonya’s wrist and saw how deep impales the hooks where in her hands.

 Vaggie - “Aw geez the hooks are really impaling in your hands.”

 Sonya - “Please just do it! I can’t take any more of the torture.”

 Vaggie - “I know the hooks and shocking must be really painful.”

 Sonya - “Well yeah but wearing the dress is the real torture! And I don't care how painful to take out the hooks just get me out!”

 Vaggie - “Hang on, kiddo.” Vaggie took a deep breath, and  start pulling the first hook out and Sonya’s left hand. Vaggie managed to pull out the hook and Sonya managed not to scream, but a few tears slipped out. Her left hand was free but now had a hole and was bleeding more.

 Vaggie - “It’s okay Sonya, just one more hook and your free.”

 Sonya then gasps because she felt like somebody was holding her ankles. Vaggie and Sonya looked down to see Angel Dust halfway out the bottom stage door and holding on to her ankles.

 Vaggie - “What are you doing?”

 Angel Dust - “I’m getting the kid out what it looks like?”

 Vaggie - “Hey I got everything under control.”

 Angel Dust - Well you are taking too long. Plus I don’t think Charlie can keep up with the shitty clown act.”

 Charlie was still doing some goofy dances. While the Egg Bois was laughing and enjoying it, Sir Pentious and Lucius was just confused.

 Lucius - *whispers* “You think he’s a drunk clown or a drug addict clown?”

 Sir Pentious - *whispers* “Not sure. They are always hard to tell. It could be both.”

 Lucius - “Well this clown dance is weird.”

 Sir Pentious - “Agreed. *yelling* Hey clown! Entertain my nephew!”

 Sir Pentious threw an Egg Boi at Charlie. However Charlie caught it and began to juggle the egg boi.

 Lucius - “Oh that’s cool!”

 Sir Pentious - “Oh do you Huh? Hey clown! Juggle these!”

 Sir Pentious threw lots of Egg Bois at Charlie as she tried her best to juggle them. Lucius was laughing and being entertain as Pentious kept throwing more egg Bois. Unfortunately, it was too many Egg Bois she had to juggle, and she ended up losing her balance and fell dropping the Egg Bois. Sir Pentious and Lucius laughed at the some of the Egg Bois ended up getting splattered. However, one Egg Boi, grabbed onto the curtain and tried to hold on but his gripped wasn’t strong enough to hold on. But it was strong enough to pull down the curtains. That when it reveals Vaggie and Angel Dust trying to free Sonya and they all had an “oh crap!” Look while Sir Pentious and Lucius looked shocked.

 Now that they are caught,  Angel Dust quickly pulled Sonya down. The good news is that freed Sonya’s from the chains. Bad news: while it did freed Sonya, the hook was still impaling to her hand and Angel Dust accidently slam her face to the ground. Angel Dust quickly pulled Sonya with him to the stage floor and close the door.

 Lucius - “Those disgusting parasites are stealing my property!”

 Sir Pentious - “Well don’t just stand there you duck shits! Get that gay parasite!”

 Some of the Egg Bois grabbed long tasers stick and began to stick it on the stage ground. Angel Dust was holding Sonya in his second pair of arms and was dodging all the lasers. Angel kept dodging and even took out his gun to shoot them while holding Sonya.

 Sonya - *impressed* “Whoa you’re really good!”

 Angel - “Eh I work part time as a stripper before kid. This actually similar to this only I don’t have to take off my clothes.”

 While that was happening, Vaggie jumped down stage and began to crush some of the Egg Bois that was coming toward her and using the tasers. Charlie quickly took off the clown costume and also began to fight back.

 Sir Pentious - “Ah Princess. I should've known you were the jester because that all you are in hell!”

 Charlie - “At least I’m not a try-hard wannabe like you!”

 Lucius - “How dare you insult my Uncle like that!”

 Lucius pressed a button on the table and lasers began to come out. It started to shoot Charlie and Vaggie, but they managed to dodge them and even use Egg Bois as shields.

 Sir Pentious - “You added lasers? I taught you well my boy!”

 Lucius - “Well I did learn from the best.”

 However, Vaggie managed to destroy the laser gun by throwing a knife at it. Angel Dust managed to get himself and Sonya out of the bottom stage. Unfortunately, he tripped over a dead Egg Boi’s yolk and end up dropping Sonya. Sonya slid across the floor and two Egg Bois chained her up.

 Lucius - “Your parasites should have known better to steal my property!”

 Charlie - *angry* “Property?!”

 Vaggie - “Sonya isn’t your property!”

 Angel Dust - “Yeah! Charlie knew Sonya longer so she’s Charlie’s property.”

 Sonya - “Not helping!”

 Lucius - “Doesn’t matter. I choose and get what I want: And I choose Sonya as my property and that she is!”

 Sir Pentious - “And somebody tries to get in my nephew’s way, they have to go through me!”

 Sonya then managed to get up and swing the Egg Bois to the wall since they didn’t tighten the chains enough. Then Lucius noticed Sonya standing up and looking angry.

 Lucius - “Don’t you know it’s unlady of you to fight! It’s my birthday and I order you to surrender.”

 Sonya - “Surrender my ass! I don’t give a crap if it your birthday or bar mitzvah, I’m nobody's especially your property. All of the torture, you put me in a dress! Since you love puppets so much: Why don’t you be one!”

 Sonya pulled the hook out of her right hand beside the pain and threw it at Lucius. The hook impales his shoulder and he was now stuck in the wall.

 Lucius - *in pained* “Wow...this hook is pointy!”

 Sir Pentious - “Lucius!”

 Charlie - “And why don’t you join him!”

 Charlie took out two Spears that Vaggie handed her and impales Sir Pentious’s arms and pinned him on the ground.

 Angel - *amazed* “Whoa Princess that was impressive.”

 Charlie - “Hey you messed with family, you get deadly consequences.”

 Sir Pentious - “You will pay for this!”

 Sonya - “Hey here’s a treat for you!”

 Sonya took some cake and smashed it on Sir Pentious’s face. Then he walked up to Lucius and said:

 Sonya - “Happy birthday your douchebag of a brat!”

 Sonya smashes cake on Lucius face too. Then she and the others left the “party”. One of the Egg Boi just blew a party blower which Lucius angrily kicked him.

 ()()()()()()()()

 At the hotel, Sonya was now back in her regular clothes since she keeps spare clothes at the hotel. Charlie was cleaning the wounds on Sonya’s hands and was wrapping it gauze bandages. Then Charlie was finished, and Sonya was feeling better.

 Sonya - “Thanks for saving me guys.”

 Charlie - “Anytime. How are you feeling?”

 Sonya - “Well beside the terrible pain I felt getting shock, hooks impale in my hands, bang into walls, wearing a pink dress, and this could most likely scar me for life...I'm fine.”

 Charlie hugged Sonya in comfort since spent the whole day getting tortured by one of her most hated enemies .

 Charlie - “I’m just glad that you are okay. You know we would do anything to save you right?”

 Sonya - *smiling* “Yeah I know.”

 Vaggie - “I’m surprised that psycho brat didn’t come out.”

 Sonya - “Well she felt like that was more of my battle. Plus my hands was still in pain so she couldn’t use her weapons and didn’t want to bring more pain when it comes to using the fists.”

 Angel - “But what happened to Miss “I can escape Blindfolded?”

 Sonya - “Hey I was knocked out! I was caught off guard.”

 Vaggie - “Now we gotta know to be more careful. We can’t let that happen again.”

 Sonya - “I know I mean I can’t be one of those wimpy damsels in distress girls. They are so annoying and useless.”

 Charlie - “I understand that. But there’s nothing wrong for asking for help to get rescue once in a while.”

 Angel - “Yeah I mean I even asked for help when Penny kidnapped me.”

 Sonya - “He kidnapped you before?”

 Angel - “Yeah. He tried to torture me, but all he did was turn me on if you know what I mean?”

 Charlie - *uncomfortable* “Uhh right. *to Sonya* “What Angel is trying to say that is that even tough people like him and you, even Liz, would sometimes need help being rescue. And we would do anything to save you because we are two peas in a pod and family.”

 Sonya - “Thanks Cousin Charlie. I would do the same too.”

 Charlie and Sonya smiled and hugged each other. Charlie was happy that she rescued her cousin and Sonya knows her cousin and her new friends would come to rescue whenever she’s in trouble.

 Hope you all like it!

[the-mf-bread-babies]

1/8/20

VOLUME FOUR, PART TWO~!

WHO ELSE IS WRITING IT?! ROCCO NORTH, BABY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CHAPTER ONE

I CHANGED MY MIND HE DOESN'T GET KIDNAPPED lmao

After their work in protecting the house, the family went to bed. Well, except for Aaron, who watched Damon sleep just in case he died or anything.

The next morning, they woke up peacefully, to the sound of–

EXPLOOOSIIOOONNSSS!!!

Well, SHIT !!! Aaron, passed out from tiredness was still sleeping on the floor, though. “Aaron!! Wake the hell up, there's bombs!!” Damon shouted, repeatedly slapping Aaron's face. “Huh…?” Damon gave up and dragged his dad across the bedroom floor. “Hey, hey, I can walk, dude,” Aaron assured, slowly standing up.

A loud boom echoed throughout the house, alerting them even more. Although, it didn't seem like it came from an explosive, but rather, an impact. Their first thoughts were that NULL was using a battering ram on their front door.

The family assembled in the basement, equipped with weapons and protection. “So, what the hell's goin’ on now?” Gabriel asked. “Man, I thought you were gonna explain it or something.” Damon sighed as he looked at the others. “Dennis?” “I literally was friggin’ shaving when I heard the sounds?” he uselessly explained. “I was performing satanic rituals for the plants.” Lan confessed. “Okay, dad, but seriously, where are these guys?” Aaron grumbled, rubbing his forehead.

CRASH!

A hole formed in the stone basement ceiling as it came crashing down, sunlight shining into the area. A small woman whose grey hair covered her whole body to her knees swiftly emerged from the rubble, dusting herself off and hopping back outside.

“Who. Who was that.” Gabriel asked. “Do we have banshees here?” Lan added. “To my knowledge, the only ghosts related to Irish folklore in this house are the deer leg ladies and the lady who keeps using the washing machine to wash medieval armor.” Aaron explained. “Other than that, nada,”

The family halted their conversation as they heard the sound of multiple people screaming for their lives. “Okay, well, what's that?” Gabriel asked. “I– Dad, I don't even know where the rubble lady came from!” Aaron whined, the screaming still in the background.

ace: “die, bitches!”

“Yeah, pretty sure that's not NULL,” Lan pointed out. “Their agents get shot on sight after using foul language.” He revealed. “Really?” Damon asked, thinking about how bad of an agent he would be if he was recruited. “No, I just made that up.” Lan confessed, smirking. “Why…” Gabriel questioned, looking at him with a disappointed face. “Why not?”

nova: “OOH, A STUN GUN, OH NO!”

“HOWEVER WILL WE MAKE IT OUT ALIVE?!”

“HELP~!”

The four paused, noticing a third person in the fight. “Rude.” Damon commented at the girl's behavior.

sarah: “guys i accidentally fricked up the floor”

“do we have to pay insurance or whatever”

“also whats insurance”

ace: “it's a scam designed for you to die.”

Andre: “What Ace said. Also, pretty sure we don't have to do anything, since this place is a ghost town, anyways.”

jake: “mhm also theres probably horses or w/ever so watch out for that lol”

orc: “I SAW A PILE OF FROGS EARLIER”

j: “or that sometimes yknow”

The family peeked their heads out from inside, eavesdropping on the conversation.

o: “YEA BUT THE THING IS”

“I DONT KNOW HOW TO HOLD FROGS”

sar: “you have to like. gently carry those gentlemen around. palm at the side, fingers supporting their body and your thumb keeps them in place, orc, my friend,”

a: “ALSO SPRAY THE BITCHES!”

s: “yea spray them they like it it's fun n stuff”

andre: “Where. Where's the little froggies.”

j: “idk im scared”

a: “coward”

o: “ALSO SCARED OF FROGS”

“THEY ARE METAPHORICALLY CHILDREN”

s: “explain”

o: “SMALL AND CAN DIE EASILY ALSO WEIRDLY SLIMY AND SOFT”

andre: “Babies aren't slimy tho…”

o: “FLORIDA”

an: “oh ok”

“NULL doesn't usually talk about frogs.” Dennis pointed out. “They don't.” Damon agreed. “Also, they don't have members that tall. Or short.” Aaron commented. “Rebel gang?” Lan suggested. Gabriel squinted his eyes, staring at the group. “Last time I checked, undercover NULL agents, even if they exist, don't hide that kind of hair under their helmets. That kid next to the banshee there definitely does not have helmet hair, I mean, the volume and all…”

“hmm? i think those are peeeoopleeee” “guyss” The stylish hair kid pointed out. “cuz i dont think horses look like that!!!!!!!” they exclaimed, strutting towards the basement. “im scared” “help” “yall” “yall means all” they continued, facing their group. “Well, damn, Ace, if it's a horse, give it a carrot or something.” another voice said nonchalantly.

“meanie” “ill kill u” Ace threatened threateningly. “I CAN GO WITH YOU IF YOU WANT!!” A voice offered politely. “thanks nova!!!!!!! andre u can choke” Ace thanked, proceeding with Nova to the basement, the family anxiously awaiting them.

Ace had a normal, skinny, 5'7"-ish body, and they had a sharp jaw and small eyes. Their hair was brightly colored, with brown roots turning into an orange and then into a red, with yellow tips. They were wearing a gray vest above a loose black sleeveless shirt. Also jeans and shoes. Ace is not naked or something.

Nova, on the other hand, towered over Ace. She wore a trucker hat that pushed down her thick hair enough to cover her eyes, and it was tied into two big puffs. Her hair was dyed different shades of green in small spots, making it look like a small, bright shrub sitting on her head. She wore a denim jacket with lots of enamel pins stuck to it. Beneath that was a grey t-shirt, and below that were ripped jeans and UGG boots… somehow, in the amalgamated world.

“Hi! We're the Russell family!” Aaron welcomed, nearly giving them heart attacks by LOON∆ i should listem to that again. “What the fuck?!” Andre remarked, leading the rest into the basement. He was wearing a silky-looking black button-up shirt with a red tie with dress shoes, and his dreadlocks were neatly tied back. He certainly wore a fancy look for raiding NULL bases.

“Yeah, I'm Aaron, this is my dad Gabriel, my dad Lan, my husband Dennis, and my son, (no matter what,) Damon. We have 36 cats and countless ghosts here. Please proceed with caution, most of these babies are strictly indoors-only!”

The group stared at them in shock, unable to believe anything Aaron just said. “How… do you get… 36 cats…” Andre asked. “We used to have a pet shop. It fell down, though, so that's that.” Dennis answered casually. “like. how. like fell down into space” A blue-haired man asked, earning him Damon's full attention.

“Yeah, into space.” Gabriel said. “Just straight down.” Lan elaborated, “No stops or anything, just ZOOP!” “Yeah, that's why we moved into a haunted mansion.” Aaron added. “So, what group are you guys in?” he asked, making a head shoot up in surprise from one of them.

He had gelled blue hair parted in the middle, and his right eye seemed like it had something inserted in it. He wore a dark blue denim jacket with ripped off sleeves and very short, tight jorts. He also had black wristbands, indicating a past emo phase. Or one that's still ongoing, as made obvious by his combat boots.

“oh its kinda indie u guys. u guys probably dont know it :,(” The blue-haired man said sadly, pouting. “We're called the…” Andre began. “C'mon, Jakey, say it.” “no its dumb” he grumbled. “skullsmashers. it's because we smash people's skulls. metaphorically.” Ace explained, asking Jake for confirmation. “right, 8-ball?”

“we really dont......” Jakey/8-Ball said sadly. “Oh, you named us this, Jakey, honey,” Andre contested. “So why can't we smash people's skulls? Like, clearly, I can take the emotional trauma or whatever, as long as it's NULL, or hell, maybe even some dipshit, I can do that.” he added softly.

“Ah, pretty sure they're not NULL,” Lan said, smiling. “So, did you kill them all of them or what?” he asked as he raised his weapon, a mace he was somehow managing to hold with ease. Like. A mace with spikes. Ace nervously played with their hair, sporting a terrified face. “what!?” they exclaimed in a high-pitched voice. “We can definitely take care of them. How do you think this place is officially a ghost town?” Gabriel asked. “Setting up traps and making friends with the local ghosts go a long way, y'know,”

“There's fucking ghosts?!” Andre exclaimed, pulling out daggers from under his arms. “Yeah, but they're nice, so it's okay.” Damon explained with not a trace of fear in his eyes, making Andre slowly put the daggers back in. “Oh, by the way, if you guys see an arm there, could you get it for me?” he requested politely, “And honestly, I'd like to make a pun with lending hands, but I can't seem to put my finger on which one I'd make.” He added, raising his bandaged stump.

“Oh, Jake, don't–” Andre warned before Jake fainted instantly from seeing the bloody bandages on Damon's wound. “I'm sorry,” he apologized. The fainting had sent Aaron quickly went to the operating room, just now realising that he hasn't changed the bandages yet. “uh lemme go check if theres any” the small woman said, scuttling away. “Thanks,” Damon said before following Aaron.

Dennis, Lan, and Gabriel stood awkwardly in front of The Skullsmashers, not knowing what to do. “So, uh, whaddya do?” Dennis asked, folding his hands together. “gamign” Ace quickly responded. “Well, we each tend to go our own ways, but occasionally we team up to raid NULL bases and stuff.” Andre explained, ignoring Ace's statement. “What about you guys?”

“Ah, so I like gardening, and also do some baking from time to time, and Gabriel here used to be a traveling psychic, but now he tends to help me with errands and chores and sometimes we communicate with the ghosts here. Dennis and Aaron used to run a pet shop near here, but now Dennis does some farming, and Aaron spends his spare time caring for our pets.” Lan explained.

“And I do the groceries! And all the other stuff that involves going outside,” Damon intervened, coming back with an anxious, squeaky-clean Aaron. “Which is why my arm got cut off.” he revealed, sitting down on the wooden floor. “ok im back did i miss anything :'//” Jake asked, waking up from his faint earlier. “… we'll catch up later.” Andre replied.

“arm!!!” The banshee yelled out excitedly, waving a cooler back and forth. “Great! Just toss it down,” Aaron said happily, reaching his arms out. Seeing this, Damon ran to the operating room. “Last one's a rotten egg!” he shouted, snickering. “Well, while they work on that, do you guys maybe wanna come in and grab a snack?” Gabriel suggested politely, eager to learn more about the group. “yea sure!! thanks!!” said Jake, who was joyfully running to the front door.

A large figure stood patiently outside the door, belonging with the Skullsmashers. It seemed like a gentle giant, tapping its index fingers together. It was definitely from another world. It had greenish grey skin, and its head was blocky and looked like it was separate from his large jaw that had two moles on it. Its eyes were big and white, and above them were thick eyebrows. And it was wearing what seemed to be a large, furry, ruff reaching his knees that were covered by jorts. Its shoulders were completely covered with a large spiky red boulder on each one. The creature was ten feet tall, and was very strong.

At last, the large doors opened with a creak, the sunlight from outside shining brightly into the house. It was the first time in years that the front doors were opened, and it was for good; they had stayed in there for too long.

CHAPTER TWO

A PROPER INTRODUCTION

The family and the group were sitting in the dining hall, awaiting the arrival of Aaron and Damon. A shit ton of homemade potato chips were strewn across a long plate in the middle as the main course. Lan had prepared a variety of dipping sauces and some napkins. They sat in silence.

“I don't mean to be rude or anything, but how… are you guys still alive?” Andre asked cautiously, starting a conversation. Gabriel dipped a chip in cheese sauce, then thought of a simple answer: “We really just hide and plant stuff. Also, we were really lucky.”

Nova played around with a fork, debating whether these people were real or not. Yes, NULL couldn't possibly use their precious budget to make intricately designed haunted houses with personal touches and residents whose personalities were very unique, as well as their relationship with each other, but, hell, maybe they can.

NULL always had a way to worm themselves everywhere, down to the place she stayed in, the people she knows, and, well, really, everywhere. Even if this family was what they presented themselves as, NULL could do lots of things to not only dishevel Nova and the group she was in, as well as this family, they can manipulate both of them to destroy each other. After all, that's the kind of thing they do– get someone else to do their dirty work.

Nova made up her mind, opting to ask them directly. “I also really don't mean to be rude, but given the large amount of undercover NULL agents and all the different ways they come as, I just have to ask… and this is a very dumb, and useless question, but are you guys in any way… involved with NULL?”

Dennis smiled lightly, understanding that this group was in the same deliberation as they were. “To be honest, we were gonna ask you that too at some point, but I personally don't think NULL agents would look this…” “well, they wouldn't, like… have wrists this limp.”

The room was silent for a while, before erupting with laughter. “You– you fuckin’ thought we weren't NULL because–” Andre struggled, wheezing. “No NULL agent would dress like that, Andre,” Gabriel pointed out, snickering. “Yeah, you think those idiots can achieve this level of interior design?!” Lan added, gesturing wildly towards every piece of furniture in the hall.

“… But really, to answer your question there, yeah, we are technically involved with NULL,” Dennis said, completely changing the atmosphere of the room. “We're classified as Class-4 criminals for, um, giving some of their agents here some mild inconveniences.” he added in a serious tone. “And by mild inconveniences, I mean a few cases of attempted murders, robberies, hauntings, and other stuff like that.” The group sighed a breath of relief, knowing they were both on the same page.

“I have to say, 45 cases of attempted murder and two cases of successful murder does sort of count as a bit more than a mild inconvenience, though, Dennis,” Lan said jokingly. “Oh, and remember when someone planted poison ivy that somehow mysteriously completely wrapped around the whole base they had here, down to the basement?” he added, grinning. “Okay, well let's not compare our crimes here, dad,” Dennis teased. “Everybody knows mine was the best attack yet when I trapped them inside the base by encasing it with raw eggs! somehow” he added, cackling.

The two families had a great time together, laughing and talking about their experiences in the new lives they lived caused by the amalgamation. Meanwhile, Aaron was carefully reattaching an arm to an unconscious Damon. After some hard work, he succeeded, and did his best to celebrate in the operating room.

However, at this point, he became too tired to do so, considering the fact that he alone performed an entire surgery. Still, it was a miracle for both of them. He waited for Damon to wake up and see the finished product, but he ended up passing out while making a celebratory coffee.

The two slept well and endlessly. The rest of the family, however, were faced with a tough decision to make. Dennis, Gabriel, and Lan had the same question echo in their minds:

“Would you like to consider joining us, The Skullsmashers?”

It was a question Andre always asked to those who he saw potential in, no matter who– or whom, no idea. They could be two friends living in a dilapidated house with rats and mice, or three odd creatures in a grocery store, or even some nervous teenager who suddenly asked him to kill someone in the middle of his New Year's Eve party.

It's not that he simply sees something out of the ordinary happen and immediately hands out flyers, but it's that Andre has been gifted with an eye for this type of thing– take, for example, the situation at hand.

Andre raids a NULL base with his friends. The fight continues into the abandoned city the base was in. His friend lands into a basement of a house. Sarah, the friend, points out that there are people living in said house. Said people are clearly weird.

Resident asks for his arm back. Very weird. Still little to no potential, except maybe for interior design. Residents invite them for dinner. Residents have knives and shit.

Potential spotted. nah jk lemme do this again lol

[TAKE TWO]

Okay, okay. Andre doesn't just see people doing weird shit and immediately hires them, contract and all, but instead he observes them further.

If he sees someone hurling flaming batons into the sky, that person does have potential, yes, definitely, but what kind? This style of combat could definitely be a possibility in their attacks, given the practicality and the ostentatiousness of it.

However, it's an art one could hardly practice. The perils one could face are far too much for such a display. But, even though it's inconvenient, it's still very useful. If there was a good amount of accelerant on the baton, an enemy could not only receive a strong blow, but the added accelerant will most likely set them on fire too, rendering them not only useless in further combat (unless they're a very determined individual) but also a potential threat to anyone near them.

And the fact that a person is employed as the weapon is more convenient than, say, a large flaming baton-throwing machine, which would be difficult to program and to bring to an attack.

However, Andre also has to consider the person (itself? themselves? idk man) in an approach. Maybe they're NULL, or maybe even just someone who wants to throw flaming stuff into the air with no deeper meaning or intent. Maybe this person is unsuitable for combat; maybe this person is an enemy or a rival.

The approach is like a job interview– ask them about their experience in the field, if they have any other [good points?? is good points the word], if they're okay with joining the group– but sadly, he lives in a world where anything wildly good or wildly bad can happen, and it makes the whole process a whole lot more harder.

So, maybe these people inviting them over for a meal might give them a new addition or two. Or, sadly, remove some members.

Will the Russell family join The Skullsmashers? The decision has to be made any second now.

• end •

[longingfreesia]

mizakai.docx aka “mizael got kicked out and doesnt know what to do with himself now so he goes to kaitos house and kaito is not exactly happy about this”

its not technically “complete” but im pretty much done with it so here it is anyway! its almost 3k words of pure self indulgence

It's around six o'clock in the evening when Mizael comes to pay Kaito an impromptu visit.

If, of course, you can count banging on someones door and yelling their name a "visit," but Kaito was used to "weirdos" at this point.

It's at about the third yell of "KAITO TENJO!" with an addition of "ARE YOU NOT HOME? THIS IS YOUR PLACE OF RESIDENCE, RIGHT? ARE YOU IGNORING ME?" that Kaito finally gets up and goes to the door, albeit groaning lowly the entire way.

He opens the door and Mizael nearly hits him in the face with a fist intended for his door. "Why. Why are you here."

Mizael scoffs. "Don't I have a right to be?"

"No. Not at all." Kaito says, deadpan.

"Well," Mizael starts, and in a rather uncharacteristic fashion stumbles looking for words, as if he was expecting Kaito to go, 'Yes, of course, Mizael, I'm so honored you would come and visit me in my humble abode, graceful and angelic in your beauty as you are,' and eventually settles on "I'm here now, anyway, and you're not about to just dump me out on the street after I came all the way here, are you?"

Kaito contemplates telling him yes, he was, and shutting the door, but decides against it. "Fine." He steps aside and opens the door a bit further, and Mizael immediately strides inside.

It dawns on Kaito that he's not really wearing much. Or, rather, he's not wearing anything particularly heavy. Did a skintight tank and stirrups count as much?

Not that it mattered, as Mizael, being Mizael, didn't seem to notice in the slightest. Instead, he looks around for a moment, and is somewhat confused when there isn't somewhere for him to sit in his immediate vision.

"Is this what it's like here?" He asks, and Kaito is just so, so tired.

"Yes, it is. You're looking at it. That's a ridiculous question." Kaito replies. Mizael looks offended at even the implication that he could've said something "ridiculous," but Kaito continues before he can say anything.

"And if you're trying to say something about my living conditions, I don't care. I wasn't expecting you." It wasn't like it was awful, just a bit messy, what you would call "lived-in." But of course Mizael would find that preposterous, unacceptable, etcetera etcetera.

Mizael turns his nose up at him and finds his way to Kaitos couch, sitting down in it and crossing his legs with an entitled air. Kaito settles down across from him in an old armchair and sighs.

"So, why are you here, really?" He asks.

Mizael simply says, "Do I need a reason to come see you?" and it's so transparent it hurts.

"Did you get kicked out?"

Mizael is taken aback. "Wh- No! Of course not! I just, they-" He takes a slow breath, "I was told, 'Mizael, you need to find a place of your own. You can't live here forever.' As if they know anything, they let Durbe stay there all he wants, what does he do? He's a freeloader! He-" Kaito holds up a hand. Part of him is amazed Mizael hasn't caught on to what was going on at the Kamishiro household, but he leaves it alone.

"So you came to me. You were told you needed to take care of yourself, and you came to me." Kaito can practically feel his exhaustion growing.

"I-" Mizael tries, fails, "I didn't know what else to do."

At least he was honest about that part. Kaito doesn't want to let Mizael stay, not really. However, his slumped shoulders and the mere fact that Mizael is so unable to function on his own makes him feel kinda bad for the guy.

Also, he's not too bad to look at, but telling him that probably wouldn't help.

Kaito hums, stands up. "Alright. You can stay here a while. Don't get too greedy though, I expect you to earn your keep while you're here." He almost laughs at how quickly Mizaels face goes from glee to despair.

"Earn my keep… how exactly?" Mizael asks, the apprehension in his voice obvious from how carefully he picks through his words.

"Not much. Just run errands for us, maybe." Kaito thinks on it a bit more, considers how capable Mizael would be of walking into a grocery store and buying things on a list on his own, and says, "I'd help, sometimes. You just have to try, alright?"

Mizael stares at him for a moment, thinking it through, then nods.

Things are quiet for a while after that, as Kaito starts preparing tea in the kitchen.

Mizael finds that it's not a bad quiet. The subtle sounds of Kaito moving around the kitchen, and the low whine of the kettle is pleasing. He even finds himself becoming somewhat drowsy. He can't really help it.

Suddenly, something occurs to him, and he asks, "Where's Haruto?"

Kaito glances up at him, then back down at his hands. "He's taking a nap. I'm surprised you didn't scare him awake with your racket." Mizael has the decency to look a little guilty.

Not enough to say sorry though, apparently. And not enough to not be incredibly nosy.

"You like tea? I never took you as the type." Mizael asks. Kaito doesn't want to think about the implications of that.

"I don't, really. I prefer coffee. You seem like 'the type,' though. So." Kaito pours out the kettle.

"Then why do you have it?"

Kaito shrugs. "Droite and Haruto like it, too."

The small clicks of porcelain setting on the counter stop after a time, and Kaito brings a dish back to the table between them with two cups on it.

Mizael feels almost flattered.

Mizael is surprised somewhat at how nice they are. They're rather pretty, in fact, and he tells Kaito this, but he doesn’t seem to care. He tries the tea itself, and the warmth and surprising sweetness of it is comforting. He can taste honey in it. How odd.

Kaito doesn't seem interested in talking, rather, seeming quite content in just leaning back with his eyes closed and his cup between his hands. Mizael suddenly feels very uncomfortable. It stays like that for a long while.

Kaito eventually gets up to go and wake up Haruto for dinner, and Mizael takes this as an opportunity to look around.

It's not a terribly fancy place. It's decent enough and nothing more, and somehow, that makes it feel like a home. Mizael finds that's an odd feeling, feeling like he's in a home, but doesn't pay it too much mind.

Kaito doesn't come back for a long time. He supposes it's because he's explaining to Haruto that Mizael will be living with them for a while. Which brings up a sort of terrifying idea, just how long is he going to be here-

"Mizael." Kaito says, and Mizaels head snaps up to look at him. "This would be the first time you've properly met Haruto, wouldn't it?" Mizael thinks on it, and nods.

"Well. Haruto, you probably remember Mizael, right? I know some… complications happened before, but he's," Mizael can tell he's struggling to come up with a word, but he quickly recovers, "a friend of mine, now. In any case, you two have to get used to each other." He smiles a bit, a soft expression that is almost unnerving to Mizael in the sheer unfamiliarity of it. "Although, I know Mizael is a real handful sometimes." Mizael wants to protest, but Haruto giggles at the statement and something in his heart flutters. Maybe not this time.

He stands up from his seat, trying his best to maintain an approachable face. He's told sometimes he has a resting expression that looks kind of scary. It would be bad, probably, if he scared Kaitos little brother as his first impression.

"Hello, Haruto." He crouches down to meet Haruto at eye level. For a genuinely frightening moment, Haruto simply stares at him with his big, wide eyes, and Mizael thinks that Haruto hates him, will never forgive him for what he-

Haruto smiles, and says "Hello, Mizael!" and something about it makes his eyes prickle.

He holds his hand out apprehensively, looks up at Kaito, and Kaito nods to give him the O.K. He lightly ruffles Harutos hair and says, "Nice to meet you. I hope we can get along." And gives his best attempt at a friendly smile. It seems to work, because Kaito isn't throttling him, and that's usually a good sign.

HERES THE BIG TIMESKIP BECAUSE IM IMPATIENT.

Mizael can't help but notice how skinny Kaito is.

He's trying his best not to stare, but- He can see so many of Kaitos bones through his skin, the bumps of his spine, his shoulder blades, even some of his ribs, when he's bent over or stretched-

Mizael wonders why his body is like that. Why his skin seems stretched taut over his bones, why his veins showed through it- though it'd be rude to ask, wouldn't it?

He wonders how it feels. His mouth works faster than his brain, and he blurts that out.

"…What?" Kaito turns his head to look at him, not quite turning all the way around. His face has a mixture of confusion and what looks to be the start of revulsion on it, and Mizael is afraid.

"I. I was just, thinking about your body." Okay, bad start. Judging by Kaitos face, he agreed. "It's just. Are you alright? You don't look healthy." The expression on Kaitos face grows. He was only making this worse for himself, wasn't he? But he didn't understand why.

Kaito stares at him. His brow is furrowed and his nose is crinkled up but at least it's more confusion, now. "I hear enough of that from Gauche and Droite. I don’t need it from you, too."

Mizael is only more confused. Wouldn't he want to know? "But, why? Do you let yourself look like that, I mean. Shouldn't you care about what your body looks like? I… have heard of how you feel, sometimes, and I think that'd help-"

"Shut it." Kaito snaps. Mizael does as he's told.

"Mizael." Kaito says firmly, and it makes Mizael look Kaito in the eyes and a bit too afraid to look elsewhere.

"I'm dying, Mizael. There's no getting around that." He falls back onto his bed, and sighs. "I came to terms with that a long time ago. When you're quite literally killing yourself for the sake of someone you love, you kind of stop caring about physical appearances. Is that clear?"

Mizael isn't sure what to do with this.

"I- Ah." Suddenly, anywhere is better to look at than Kaitos face. "Yes, I understand. I'm sorry for prying."

Kaito interrupts him with, "No, no, I- fuck." He falls back onto the bed. "That was. Bad. I'm sorry. It's just-" He runs his hands over his face.

"I'm, tired. I'm sorry for that. It was unnecessary." He takes a long breath. "I'm just sick of hearing about it." Kaito is staring up at the ceiling, and Mizael somewhat regrets opening his mouth.

In a sort of desperate grasp for something to distract from the whole thing, Mizael says, "May I?"

Kaito lets his head fall toward Mizael and glares at him sideways. "May you what."

"Feel. Your body. Or, your bones, I suppose." Mizael doesn't even finish his sentence before Kaito is jolting up in the bed.

"Please, specify." He says, voice sounding like cold rocks and Mizael realizes that he didn't choose his wording very well.

"Well, I was… looking at you, as you were undressing. And, your bones, they show through your skin. In fact, it's as if you don't have any muscle there." He ignores the way Kaitos eyebrow twitches. "I… think it's interesting."

Kaito pauses. "Interesting?" He asks, and seems willing to forgive the absurdity of Mizaels request if just for a moment.

"Well… Yes." Mizael starts, "Your bones are odd. And the fact they show through your skin, it's odd."

Kaito seems almost interested, himself. "How so?"

"Well, for one thing- It doesn't usually do that, does it? Well, no, of course it doesn't, Alit and Durbe aren't like that. Your whole body exudes this feeling of tiredness, and I suppose that'd be accurate, wouldn't it?"

Kaito chuckles, a strange noise coming from him. Perhaps incited by the fact Mizael seemed to be rambling to himself, now. "Yeah, I guess so."

"Right. So-" Mizael pauses, bringing a knuckle to his lips, "Are your bones different from other humans'?"

"Good question." Kaito says, stretching. "I definitely know my body is, at this point."

"I want to see."

"Do you, now?" Kaito has an expression that Mizael feels he probably shouldn't be reading as condescending, but he does nonetheless.

"Yes. Besides, I've never really gotten to explore a human body. I know Barians aren't too different, but at the same time… They really are. It's intriguing."

"So, you want to inspect my body to see how it's different?"

"Have I not made that clear?"

Kaito scoffs. "No, I guess you have. Just making sure."

He finally takes his shirt and folds it up, but simply puts it on the nightstand. Mizael finds it curious, but doesn't say anything.

He stands in front of where Mizael is sitting, hands on his hips. "So, what exactly do you want to see?"

Mizael finds that, even though he's assuming the same cold, intimidating posture as he usually does, without the coat and the stern glare- he's not that scary.

In fact, looking at him like this makes him seem almost frail, but Mizael knows better than to think that. He knows that Kaito is anything but.

"I'd like to see your back." He says, matter-of-factly, but for some reason it causes Kaitos lips to twitch.

"Alright. But that's awkward like this. Come get on the bed." Kaito says. The way he says it is so plain. Although, Mizael thinks he shouldn't be surprised.

He does as he's told and follows Kaito to his bed. Kaito sits on the edge and Mizael settles somewhere in the middle. Kaito leans over, letting his arms rest on his legs. Mizael takes it as an invitation.

The first thing he notices is how Kaito flinches, just barely, when Mizaels fingers meet his back. He seems to be fine after that, though.

The next thing he notices is that his eyes are closed. He's breathing slowly, seeming to be trying to fall asleep sitting up. Like he was taking it as he would a doctors touch inspecting him for injury. It's somewhat odd. Mizael wonders why he would react like that.

He runs two fingers down his ribs, slowing briefly on the dip between each one.

"Can you move your arms?" He asks, upon finding something curious.

Kaito turns his head to shoot Mizael an odd look, but obliges, moving his shoulders in small, slow circles. Mizael is glad he understands the concept of research, and isn't bothered by it-

Or, at least, he hopes that's how it is. In any case, he can see Kaitos shoulder-blades moving underneath his skin, and it's weird.

Kaito is wondering whether Mizael even realizes him, exploring Kaitos body as he is could possibly be viewed as something far more than scientific. Knowing him, he might not, but Mizael is confusing and no one could see them anyway.

Needless to say, Mizaels hands are soft and graceful, and the way he runs his hands full-palm over Kaitos shoulders and biceps is kind of nice, it's relaxing, and, and he's missed soft almost loving touch-

Mizael murmurs something about "Galaxy-Eyes" among many other mumblings, and Kaito opens his eyes.

"Hm? Did you say something?" Kaito asks, turning his head just enough to catch Mizaels face, and Mizael seems to snap out of a daze.

"Did I?" His expression fades into something a bit more distressed as he realizes. "Ah. You heard that?"

"Yes, I did. What were you talking about?"

"I," Mizael stares at Kaitos back for a bit, and then, touching the bumps of Kaitos spine as he says it, "Your body is very strong."

Kaito smirks, turns his head back to face forward so Mizael can't see his face. "Is that so? Not what I'd use to describe it."

Mizael nods, despite the fact Kaito can't see. "Yes. Despite the fact you've tortured it the way you have, it still feels strong." A pause, "You still feel powerful, despite having been through so much." A smile creeps onto his face, faint, but there. "I was thinking that your Galaxy-Eyes reflects that, in a way."

"She does?"

"Yes. Though in what way, I'm not sure I could tell you. It's… not something I can put into words, I think."

Kaito thinks it over for a moment. "Thank you. I appreciate it, really." His voice is gentle, which is definitely not something Mizael is used to hearing when Kaito's speaking to him.

and heres where it cuts off because i dont know how to end things and i dont know where to take this from here. sorry about that

[lyrayeager-blog]

Beyond the soullessness

PROLOGUE 1. THE BABY FROM THE SNOW

PROLOGUE 2. WHEN BAD THINGS GO GOOD

when bad things go good, but your scared cause' you have NO idea on how to take care of a small little being.

It's a snowy afternoon on Tao mountain, and not a single person is to be seen. Not a single moving object, no long and fancy leather coats that flows past the holders kneecaps and down to the ground. Nothing. Nota. When every snow flake falls crystal clear on shady, yet smooth porch wood, a baby is born- not just any 'kind' of baby-but the kind that you have to love and cherish until it, he or she, reaches age twenty one. Well hang on just for a minute, this 'baby' isn't like any other, for it can breathe under flats made of fire, oceans with millions of grains salt- so much salt, that not any kind of merchant, fish monger, or specialized monk can even 'begin' to conquer. Magical, or the opposite. This baby is the beginning of the future, for when the crystal of snowflake fell onto the fifth porch- known to man as ''the life of hope'' a 'new' life has begun. Now, this baby must go and set all right from wrong. The baby must rise, rise, 'rise' from ashes to fill the holes in all ought hearts, this baby 'must', oh god it 'MUST' find the one person, that can fill humanity to the brink of hope. This world is in pain, dying excruciating pain! When one snowflake falls is a beautiful thing- but when one snowflake falls, another persons' heart aches and aches and aches, oh god does it ache, to the point of death. This baby, is worth one-hundred- soldiers. Help out on it's journey, to find it's soul-mate, to fill eachs' hearts', to find the person who can fill humanity with hope. This is it's story. 'this' is it's fairy-tail

It's a snowy afternoon on Tao mountain, and not a single person is to be seen. Not a moving object, nothing at all. But there's a sound. A sound, so annoyingly beautiful-and it hurts because… it's the sound of crying…. A baby crying. It's no longer snowing, but raining. The sky is no more white, but gray with a yellow, dull yellow- almost the color of an animal's urine melted unto life-full snow. It appears to be the sun, which they haven't seen in years. So it hurts hearing that baby cry, it hurts feeling the rain, it hurts seeing the dull sun, for even just barely. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts so much to the point that the wind is crying, soft on doors, and windows and roofs. The humid air feels like vaporized spray from a snake. Everything just fucking hurts. And now the crying is fading-fading-fading-fading-FADING! AND IT'S GONE, BECAUSE NOW….NOW IT CAN'T BE HEARD WITH NAKED EARS. NOW THE WIND SWAYS ON IT'S OWN. And now it hurts…. It hurts so much. Because now the only thing you can do….is cry.

HERRICK

it isn't till midnight that i heard a strange noise. a noise that woke me up from my ''Hibernation''. which is strange cause' i'm considered a very deepsleeper compared to what Yuri told me, or... Always tells me hehe. it was the exactly one-thirty- AM. and i find myself outta' bed, up and at em' as if i were waking up to Yuri's home cooked breakfast right in the mornin'. if that were the case, then maybe i would be less- pissed about waking up at one-fucking- AM. not to mention it's still dark outside, but that's how the winter is. it could even be four AM this day, and be dark as hell outside. i slip on my large (maybe that's a bit of an overstatement, but compared to Yuri's frail, small, adorable feet- i guess my shoes are considered to be pretty large.) house slippers-okay, eww. when i say 'slippers' it makes me think i'm walking around in some wedges (even though those aren't even remotely the same thing as glass slippers) and it drives me up the wall. so, instead of saying...slippers....i slide on my L.L bean sheepskin flats, and head straight down-stairs to the kitchen area slowly tiptoeing because Yuri, even though she's a really. really. really deep sleeper, more so than me, she has eyes and ears like a hawk. i mean seriously, one minute your up outta' bed she's deep in sleep, or so you thought. so your moving carefully, trying to go pee or handle your manly issues... You come back, and BAM. she's up, either texting, or just simply laying there waiting for you to come right back to bed. yeah, i love my wife and all because damn. She's lovable, sexy, funny, caring, snores in her sleep, sneezes like a kitten, and oh god, she is Great in bed. so i'm sneaking, or trying to sneak through to the kitchen because, iv'e Seen horror movies, and out of all honesty, me just going to investigate a ''strange'' noise, with nothing but my bare, human hands, that couldn't even begin to match Yuri's super-human or should i say in-human strength. and the guys like me who say ''Oh, i'll be back. but i need to go find out what this strange noise was. i could be a gunshot! so i'll just go 'see' who was shootin' it!'' like seriously, why in the holy heavens would you investigate a damn gunshot. clearly you just spelled out your own death right there. that's why im in the kitchen with a butter knife cause' all the other knifes were probably used, and in the sink with peanut butter and jelly resi-do stuck to the handle with bits of bread torn, because i decided to use that kind of knife that's used to cut a man's throat for safety purposes. or just for cutting roasted beef in half. hey, it's a win win situation here. it isn't my fault that butter knifes don't get the job down. but this shiny butter knife here, it- it's something.

surprisingly, Yuri didn't wake up this time. but now i'm going to find out about this noise. as soon as i opened the door, i'm welcomed to a porch light on by the side of our door, misty winds and an unseen sky. that or it's as dark as my wife's Lovely hair. but now that the dewy weather has snapped me outta my thoughts, i realized that it's raining. and that's something that i haven't seen in years. twenty-six years to be correct. but it was snowing earlier, it was snowing so long ago, for months and months, even in summer, all we seen was snow. imagine that-and how it feels now to finally see Rain again. even if it is darker than charcoal outside, even if i can barely feel the rain from the misty, humid air. i just know that it's raining. and now, something in my chest hearts...my...bones? no...my skin? no...my insides? i think so... but what is inside?... my heart? my heart. that's it. my heart hearts. badly, badly badly. because now, i'm on my knees, clutching at the area that hurts through my shirt, skin, and bones. my heart. its painful. oh, so painfulpainfulpainfulpainfulpaingul- Painful. Now i'm gasping for air. saliva escaping it's way through the con-sealed corners of my mouth, but then i stop breathing for a minimum of thirty seconds, or that's what i think; ''what's happening?'' until a glance of clear comes through my eyes, changing them from close, to opening. now the pain has just stopped. point blank. then there's again. the noise that woke me up clad at one- something. god, i forgot. i look down straight by my feet to where the base of the sound is. and it's a...baby? god, not again... there's that pain again. but this time, it doesn't make me gasp for air, doesn't make me clutch the sore area, doesn't make me drool like a tired dog. but instead, cry. because i think that maybe, just maybe, there's at least something changing with this broken down world. god, or whatever 'higher power' there is that even exist up there, is finally ready to make a change to this world. i'm not sure why, but i'm picking up this 'baby'? was that what it was called back then? what about now? sigh...i'm picking up this...being.. and i'm.. cradling it? geez. just when i thought this day was good, or like any other soulless day. but it's not and it isn't going to. i bet. sigh again.. i don't even know where to begin with this. when bad things go good. but you just don't wanna' admit it cause' you have no idea how to deal with a...being.. and you've got no clue how your wifes' gonna react. and it's all a big damn mess cause' you know something goods' abouta' happen. you just don't know what.

AUTHORS' NOTES

Hey guys, let me know what you thought about this SO FAR from what iv'e written. be sure to leave a suggestion/note or PM me for suggestions and what i can improve on and all that shiii. LEAVE ME A REVIEW PLEASE. as i said, this WILL be an EREMIKA fanfiction, so stay tuned! byeee ;-)

[tanzani-coil]

tagged bbys

Tagged by the wonderful @figment-fantasies​ <3

The Last: 1. Drink: coffee eyyy 2. Phone Call: my dad 3. Text message: my guy jakub bby 4. Song you listened to: sleepover by hayley kiyoko bc im trash 5. Time you cried: like. sometime last week when i was with quinn??? it might’ve been friday bc of a dumb outlander vs tumblr post i was just fuckin crying

Have You: 6. Dated someone twice: twice??? bitch i havent dated someone ONCE  7. Kissed someone and regretted it: haven’t had my first kiss yet!! <- same bby!!! 8. Been cheated on: No. they’d be dead if they did lmfao 9. Lost someone special: yah sucks bro 10. Been depressed: mate depressed is my entire personality 11: Gotten drunk and thrown up: nope not yet im hoping to get plastered w quinn one day List 3 Favorite Colors: 12. blue. like. baby blue or egg shell blue??? 13. black 14: white (my entire wardrobe is black n white monochromatic)

In the last year, have you… 15. Made new friends: @onelassieandherfandoms​ this asshole 16. Fallen out of love: nah like??? wasnt in love in the first place 17. Laughed until you cried: yES 18. Found out someone was talking about you: i mean. always 19. Met someone who changed you: i dont rly know??? i cant tell when i change 20. Found out who your friends are: eyyy yeah 21. Kissed someone on your FB list: gross

GENERAL: 22. How many Facebook friends do you know in real life: this is???? so specific????? i mean most of them i still have like. perhaps 10-20 online friends on there i havent met up with yet so 23. Do you have any pets: never had any </3 always wanted a cat and a doggo but. parents hates animals so i gotta wait till i move out 24. Do you want to change your name: yah, my birth name is like. rly feminine and long and pretentious n ive been going by my nickname for the last 6 years so much that my birth name isnt rly??? i dont rly associate it with myself 25. What did you do for your last birthday: went out for a meal with my fam. dont have enough friends to rly do anything else lmfao 26. What time did you wake up: i mean i woke up at about 9ish, went back to sleep, woke up at about 11 again, then was on and off sleeping until 12:30 when i got up 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: homework bc my teachers live off my pain 28. Name something you can’t wait for: seeing quinn again, new skuldug book, new season of outlander, 29. When was the last time you saw your Mom: today 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: my insistence on self isolation lmfao 31. What are you listening to right now: my mom jenna marbles trying to get one (1) kill on pubg 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: yah 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: art block!!!! good fucking god i havent drawn anything in like. two months. and then after that i cant remember the last time i drew anything for me because i wanted to and not for homework smh 34. Most visited website: this hellsite 35. Mole/s: got loads of em on the side of my face, but thats the side of my face that my hair/fringe covers up so??? could be worse i guess 36. Mark/s: birth mark on my right shoulder which i love a bit too much, a round patch of darker skin on my deltoid(?) where i got shot with a paintball and it’s left a scar, a scar from a shaving cut on my kneecap, and like. the unfairly over-abundance of stretchmarks on my EVERYWHERE 37. Childhood dream: I wanted to be a horse 38. Hair color: dirty blonde and blonde 39. Long or short hair: longish??? covers my nips at this point 40. Do you have a crush on someone?: uh 41. What do you like about yourself: uh?????? 42. Piercings: none, they freak me out??? but if i were to get any, it’d have to be a helix(?) piercing. i’d fancy like. a thick ring piercing if that makes sense 43. Blood type: do i look as if i know 44: Nicknames: george, but thats only if ur close to me 45. Relationship status: single and lonely as fuck lmfao but thats probably best, im just not built for relationships 46. Zodiac: sagittarius 47. Pronouns: she/her 48. Favorite TV show(s): person of interest, orphan black, outlander, the 100, brooklyn nine nine, orange is the new black, rupauls drag race, 49. Tattoos: none yet, but i rly fancy “be brave” in EXACTLY the same font as the skulduggery books, on the inside of my right wrist 50. Right or left hand: right 51. Surgery: um>?? i mean not rly??  52. Hair dyed a different color: i haven’t yet, but i want like. a lighter blonde ombre??? bc my hair is lame as fuck and i want to do SOMETHING with it 53. Sports: omf no 54. Vacation: i went to majorca a couple of weeks back just as the heat wave fuckin hit (rip me) 55. Shoes: tesco converses or black boots 56. Eating: biscuis 57. Drinking: coffee, with water inbetween bc im thirsty as fuck 58. I’m about to: do :))))) homework :)))))) 59. Waiting for: school to start up again. if i have to do homework i wanna do it actually AT school bc i cant focus for shit at home, but i can get so much done with the school facilities so 60. Want: to see quinn again i miss her dumb face 61. Get married: i want to tbh but. not built for that sort of thing 62. Career: ahahahaha jesus fuck i have no fucking clue lets not go into this

WHICH IS BETTER: 63. Hugs or kisses: HUGS. I FUCKIN LIVE FOR HUGS 64. Lips or eyes: eyes 65. Shorter or taller: i mean???? depends on the person but typically taller 66. Older or younger: older 67. Nice arms or nice stomach: i????? 68. Sensitive or loud: man idk. both 69. Hook up or relationship: relationship bc im a sap 70. Troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant bc i have a crippling fear of authority

HAVE YOU EVER: 71. Kissed a stranger: nope 72. Drank hard liquor: nope 73. Lost glasses/contact lenses: nope 74. Turned someone down: nope. i’d be so lucky lmfao 75. Sex on first date: bitch i’ve never been on a date let alone 76. Broken someone’s heart: nope 77. Had your heart broken: ahahahahahahahahahahaha 78. Been arrested: nope 79. Cried when someone died: yep 80. Fallen for a friend: ahaha  hahahah  hahahahahahahahahahaha

DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 81. Yourself: well someone fuckin has to 82. Miracles: i mean??? i’d believe it if i saw it 83. Love at first sight: i believe that you can have an instant connection or chemistry with someone which would then lead to love, but like. love at first sight has only rly ever applied to pretty emaciated people so 84. Santa Claus: nope 85. Kiss on the first date: i mean?? nah

OTHER: 86. Current best friend: i have like. three friends?? all of which i’d consider my best friend i think 87. Eye color: blue but with like. yellow on the inside??? which. having googled is apparently called central heterochromia  88. Favorite movie: oooo. probably spirit stallion of the cimarron 

i mean. all the people i would’ve tagged I think @figment-fantasies tagged anyway so like. have fun folks

[thehoneybuddhadefender]

Can I plz have some (long?) angst with RFA + V & Saeran that doesnt end well (Im not meaning like MC dying but some bad angst that makes her leave them or something)

Thank you for your request , i tried to make it long and good (i think i failed)

I HOPE YOU LIKE IT

Please feel free to send me a feedback, if this is NOT what you wanted, I’ll do it again in no time!Any mistakes, report to me

Yoosung

He’s playing all day, he didn’t even eat.

You already went there several times, always saying that he needs to take care of himself.

He doesn’t seem to worry about it, he’s ignoring you.

Sometimes you swear that it seems that he’s angry about you going there.

But you love him, you care about him.

Then you cook some food to him, he can play all night if he wants to, but he needs to eat properly.

You went there smiling “Hey Yoosung…I made food for you!” He looks at you, and then he stood up “YOU’RE MAKING ME LOSE MC!STOP BEING ANNOYING!”.

You froze, with tears in your eyes “What?YOU’RE BEING STUPID YOOSUNG, I JUST DID SOMETHING FOR YOU EAT, I DON’T WANT YOU TO GET SICK!”

He just sighs, angry, “You were right, you’re not like Rika,” He says looking down, but after some, while he looks at your eyes when he says: “Rika was better.”

He sits down, putting his headset again, while tears were falling from your face, you just can’t believe it.

You ran from that room with that plate on your hand, you put the plate on the table, you came back to the bedroom picking your things and putting it in a suitcase.

He didn’t even notice it, he was too busy playing “Sorry guys, my annoying girlfriend keeps complaining”.

When you heard that, you were sure, you need to go away.

When Yoosung stopped playing, you were already gone. He was preparing himself to say sorry, to hug you and say how much he loved you.

But now you’re gone, he thought you need some time, but after some days you were not back, he asked Seven to find you and nothing.

He was alone.

Again.

Yoosung never recovered from that.

He doesn’t eat anymore, not because of the games, this time he simply doesn’t want to.

He needs you.

But you never came back.

Zen

He’s stressed again because of the rehearsals.

He kept doing this, training and training, and now he’s like that, you warned him multiple times about that, he simply doesn’t seem to care.

When he’s like that, he smokes and drinks a lot, and because of that sometimes he says some rude things if you try to help him.

But after that, he always apologizes and sleeps hugging you promising that he would never do this again.

But he did.

You saw him smoking and you know is because he was working so much, the not even attention he was given to you.

But you’re not mad at that, you’re mad that he lied to you, you just want him to be better and doing this is not going to help him, or his career.

“Zen!” You run to him while he was smoking, not even care about you see it “You’re training so much!I know you recover fast, but this is too much!Please dear, stop! Think about you first!”

He laughs “I think you should put one cigarette in your mouth MC” He blows the smoke in your face, laughing at you “So you can shut up”. 

You open your mouth and you run to the bedroom, you can’t take this anymore.

You prepare your suitcase and you will go away, as you go he saw you and laugh “You can go anywhere you want!I find one just like you in a minute!”

You hold back your tears as you go away, and then, you’re gone.

On the next day, Zen was with a headache, he drank too much yesterday, he was so stressed from work, you were right, he must stop with this.

But when he remembers your words he remembers that you were gone.

What did you do Zen? He kept thinking that.

He asked everyone to help.

Nobody could find you.

Zen went downhill, now he’s smoking, but he’s smoking because he’s sad.

Even being so disgraceful, he keeps taking care of his appearance, if you come back he must be pretty for you!

He knows it’s been so many years ago since you were gone…

But…You will come back…

Right?

Jumin

You made his life so perfect, so happy, you made him do something that he doesn’t even know he was capable of doing…

Loving someone so much.

But sometimes he’s so demanding, he wants that dress, he wants that haircut, he wants this and that.

He said to you that Driver Kim would take you to a party that he was, and it’s for you to wear the dress that he left on the bed.

You’re sick of that, you’ll use what you want.

So you choose one dress, your makeup, you’re the way you want. When you go there Jumin looks at you, he looks angry.

He walks to you “What are you wearing? This is a fancy party, not that commoner’s thing you use to go!”

“You’re treating me like a pet Jumin!” He just sighs, looking at you “I wish you were obedient as one.”

You froze “Then…I’ll leave…” You walk away, he thought you were going home to change, so he waited for you.

He was so angry when he got home, you didn’t even show up in the party, he was alone the entire thing!

“MC!MC!!” He was searching for you until the security guard told him…You were gone, and you had a suitcase with you.

He almost hit those guys for letting you go, but he knows he cannot hold you here, you’re not a pet.

Oh right, about that, he knows he was an asshole in the party, he cannot control himself sometimes, you were stunning, so beautiful, he doesn’t know why he acted in that way.

He waited a little, but you weren’t back, so he made Seven searches for you, he spends so much money trying to find you.

And no clue.

Tears were one thing that Jumin didn’t quite know that well.

But after you left, tears are his best friend.

He’s a disgrace, he cannot forget about your last smile, a smile he wants to see again.

He’s even colder right now, the one thing that would warm his heart was you.

Growing colder and older, the successful man, it’s dead inside.

All this money can’t but a time machine.

He just wanted one opportunity to say how sorry he was.

But that opportunity never came.

Jaehee

You two are managing the cafe, you two.

But she always gets all the work and is overworking again.

You want her best, but she doesn’t want to listen to you.

She looks so bad right now, like really, she’ll get sick if she continues like this.

You can’t let her destroy herself like this “Jaehee!Go to sleep!” It was 3:00 AM, you woke up and she’s looking at things to improve the cafe.

“MC leave me alone ok?Gosh, stop.” She says annoyed, typing something, you put a hand on her shoulder “Please Jaehee…Go to bed love…” She slaps your hand.

“MC are you listening to me? I’m worried about the cafe, so let me be.“ 

You start to put your clothes in a suitcase "Ok,  if you’re not feeling well by my presence i’ll go for a few days” When you were about to kiss her cheek, she says “Good, don’t need to come back, was better when we were just friends”

She just said that? If it’s this what she wants, then ok.

You’ll not come back.

After the day you left, Jaehee’s a mess.

She doesn’t even care to look decent, she’s looking for you, she asked for help, nobody could find you.

She cries every day, she needs you.

She regrets every single word she said to you.

She cannot lose another person in her life, please.

Come back.

She prayed and prayed.

But god was cruel to her.

She’ll pray for the rest of her life to see your face again.

Please,MC, come back.

707

He’s pushing you away again, he’s trying really hard right now.

Why? He thinks he’s too dangerous for you again. He doesn’t want you to get hurt.

So he made a plan, he came back home,“drunk”, when you asked what he was doing, he just said “Fucking some girls, what do you think?” He was good at acting, so you believe it.

The next day you were going away, he accomplished, what he wanted has there, you’re going away.

But he’s not happy about it.

When Saeran knew what he has done, Seven’s said that he lied to you go away, because he was dangerous.

Saeran punched him, saying how much he loves you and how much you loved him.

Seven realized he made a serious mistake in his life.

So he uses everything that he can to find you, but nothing, he’s paying the price.

He wished you stayed, every day he’s sitting on the couch looking at the door just to hear someone knock and then he opens it and it was you.

He would make you stay.

But this was only a wish, a wish that never came true.

You are gone, he’s writing so many jokes on a paper just to tell you when you get back…Which you never did.

He just prayed that in another life, he can repair all those mistakes, he can be with you stay by his side, so he can stop crying.

He never stopped crying

V

V is just so stubborn sometimes, you want him to do the surgery, he doesn’t want to.

Ok, it’s his life, he can do whatever he wants to, but you are worried, he’s getting even worse.

Every time you try to help him, he says he doesn’t need it, why is he doing this?

In a morning V was pretty bad, he cries about it, but you didn’t know.

He wanted to be alone, but never said to you that on that day.

When you come to help him, he doesn’t know what came up in this head, but he wanted to make you sad like him “I hope Rika comes back, i would be with her again.”

You froze, you didn’t know why he said that, but this was enough too, so you pick up your things ready to leave.

V just listen to your footsteps, he froze, but he doesn’t call you back.

And he regrets about that until this day.

He wanted to apologize for that, his throat wants him to yell your name.

But he didn’t.

And this was the worst decision of his life.

After that day nobody found you.

And can sound a little weird, but he did the surgery on his eyes because he kept remembering how much you wanted it.

And he really wants to see some photos of you…

It’s too late to apologize, but he wishes he yelled your name in that moment.

You were his miracle…And he threw you away

You were his angel.

And now he really wants to go to heaven.

He’s not really sure how to feel about it, but he can’t live with it.

He’s already dead inside.

Saeran

He was having a breakdown again, and in one breakdown; he threw his cell phone that hits you, but he didn’t aim at you, it was an accident.

You knew it, but now he thinks he has a problem and this could make you get hurt again.

He rather pushes you back instead of solving his problems.

And he did that, he was selfish, he kept saying so many things to you, he made a mess, and this haunted him.

When he sees you going away, he wanted to run to you and hug you.

But you’ll be better and happier with another man, this hurts him, but it’s the best for you.

But this hurts so much.

It was late, but he always waited for you, he’s a better man now, he finally understands his problems.

So please come back, he is waiting for you with open arms.

You didn’t come back, and he’s crying to sleep every night.

He should have been a better man for you, and he’s hoping you’re happy now.

All this haunted him, he’s not stable without you.

Nobody can find you either, he had the chance to make things right, he messed up.

This was a happy home, he was a happy man.

But now he wanted you so much...

But all he has is memories.

[grubhivemind]

JOEL: *Out in the wilds of Avalon again, Joel is fresh from his strife with Orphus. He's taking the long way back to Mithun's house, wondering whether he should go back at all. Kicking his way down a dirt road, he touches at the tender swelling on his jaw.* ...Fuck. *Mutters to himself, wiping at his face again.*

MAK: *mak just so happens to live around these parts. out in the thick of it is where he likes to be, and his occupation has garnered him enough income to own a fair amount of land to call his own. he's meandering around the shoddy wooden fence about his property that lines the dirt road when he serendipitously notices joel once again. twice in two days! shoot!*

MAK: *hops to sit on the fence, waving joel down.* g'day! fancy seein' you again so soon.

JOEL: *Either that's a good hop or it's a good fence, either way white tufted ears are angling in the direction of the voice. Joel squints.* ...Oh.

JOEL: Its you.

JOEL: Must be a fancy coincidence. *draws his tongue over the claw marks on his arm again. Wincing at the stings.*

MAK: *ears perk up in surprise when he notices the state joel's in.* damn, mate... you're lookin' rough. *flops over the side of the fence so he can approach him.*

JOEL: Its a street fight on Tuesday. What else is new. *stops to eyeball the approaching troll, frowning some more.* Im fine.

MAK: well you're walkin' and talkin' so i suppose ya could be worse!

MAK: but i got some bandages and some such on me if ya need it.

JOEL: Yeah. *What is he giving affirmation to? It's a mystery. He does break out another bottle of water to chug it.* Ill get it taken care of.

MAK: *scratches at his hair, confused but not put off.* alrighty.

MAK: say, mind if i walk with ya? *seems to be doing that anyway as he moves into step beside joel.*

JOEL: Do you mind? *grouches but his words don't have much of a real bite to them. He trudges through the dirt.* Yeah sure. Fine.

MAK: *chuckles a little and stuffs his hands into his pockets, shuffling along beside him. he has to shuffle because his legs are too deng long.* i bet the other guy looks way worse than you.

JOEL: *Deng those long legs though.* I dunno. He was pretty awful lookin before. I cant take credit for all that mess of a troll.

MAK: H A H A! *that tickles him*

MAK: in that case, he can only hope ya rearranged his face for the better, eh?

JOEL: Guess so. *side eyes Mak, wondering wtf he was thinking actually.* Rileys not my middle name for nothin.

JOEL: I dont suppose you relate.

MAK: huh? to which part? *lopsided grins at the side eyeing.*

JOEL: *Okay so he doesn't side eye him so much as gaze at him.* Doing people favors and rearrangin folks faces for the better.

MAK: *the grin REMAINS.* aw, hell. if the opportunity ever presented it i sure as shit would! *punches into his open palm*

JOEL: *Heck. That's kind of cute. Joel is reluctant to admit. He ambles his way up to some fallen log just off the path. Pops a squat and breaking out the bandages and disinfectant for his arm.* So much for expectin a scolding then.

MAK: *looks surprised* what's there to scold about? ya kicked a bloody fool's ass and walked away with only a few scratches! that's bad ass in my opinion.

MAK: i mean, i A S S U M E he had to comin'. i'll take your word for it. *snickers*

MAK: only thing worth scoldin' about is neglectin' to take care of yourself. but there ya go with it. *follows, rolling to sit in the grass beside him.*

JOEL: Im doing it now. Clearly Im not neglecting. *slathers the disinfectant, clenching his teeth for the stinging pain.* Also I didnt start it. I just finished it.

MAK: *chinhands with his elbows propped on his knees. he looks silly on account of the long legs again.* ah, that's how it's done then.

MAK: what'd he come after ya for, anyhow? if ya don't mind me askin'.

JOEL: *A ridiculous bandana leggy troll. Joel snorts.* He disappeared off the face of existance for like. What. A year? Probably more? He left my brother hanging as they were a quadrant thing.

JOEL: Anyway.

JOEL: He made his appearance on Avalon like its no big deal and of course I was obligated to rat the dumbass out.

JOEL: He had some fucking nerve lemme just say. Citrin didnt even know where the fuck he was.

JOEL: So he holds some hard feelings for the reprecussions following his involuntary flagging.

JOEL: Aint my problem if you ask me. *cleans the scratch marks* Im just taking the punches.

MAK: *low whistle* sounds like a real piece 'a work alright.

MAK: if ya can't take the heat, mister... don't be messin' with all the knobs and burners and shit!

JOEL: More or less my opinion about it. *starting to apply the gauze* Then he had the nerve to tell me not to bring Citrin into it.

MAK: what a W A N K E R.

MAK: he oughta be spendin' his time apologizin' to that brother of yours instead of pickin' fights! golly...

JOEL: *secures the gauze, admiring his handiwork a moment before dropping his arm to his side.*

JOEL: Its none of my business.

MAK: 'course not, mate... but if i was you, i'd be makin' it me business for sure! nobody messes with M Y B R O T H E R.

MAK: i mean, if i had one...

MAK: speakin' strictly hypothetical here.

JOEL: Thanks man. *sighs, poking at the swell of his face again.* Speaking of which. I cant imagine what Citrins gonna say about this.

JOEL: Truth be told. Hell be disappointed.

JOEL: And I wont blame him.

MAK: ah... *scratches at his face scruff* ya think so? he still interested in this bloke?

JOEL: Mh. I dont know. *looks off, his expression withdrawing a little bit.* Not that I can say anything about subjects of this nature.

MAK: matters of the heart, ya mean? cuz me neither... *rocks in place, looking up at the sky thoughtfully.*

JOEL: Its not fun. *brushes off his pants and resolves to stand. Also to change the subject.* You live around here?

MAK: *guess that means he's sproinging to his feet as well.* sure do! just a short ways that a way.

MAK: actually, most of this is my property... beyond the fence, that is.

JOEL: Surprisin I aint seen you much around before. *steps back as he sproings. Seems like the kind of force you don't want to be in the way of.* Ownin all this land. Working with the taskforce. Auryhn too.

MAK: guess our paths just weren't crossin' till now. life's funny that way.

JOEL: Maybe you just dont get out often enough. *crosses his arms over his chest*

MAK: the amount a' time i spend gettin' out suits me just fine, thanks. *snickers*

MAK: but if you're wantin' to see more of me, that should be easy enough to arrange.

JOEL: I dont know if its got to do with wanting to. *raises an eyebrow* It just so happens that I am all of a sudden. And Im takin note of it.

MAK: whatever you say, mate! *claps him on the shoulder.* i like hangin' out with ya too!

MAK: now that ya know where i'm residin', don't be a stranger.

JOEL: *Stares on with another squint. Why's he so... friendly. And handsy.* Oh I didnt realize. This what the kids call "hanging out".

MAK: *he grew up mostly alone, m8. he doesn't even KNOW what boundaries are.* what else would ya call it??

JOEL: Mmmmm. *seems to think about it* Hanging off my arm for whatever reason.

MAK: golly. there he goes with his suspicions again... ya don't keep the company of many folks, do ya cobber??

MAK: ain't nothin' peculliar about a couple of blokes shootin' the shit, is there?

JOEL: *Feels his insides die a little bit, judging by his face. He looks onward.* I guess there aint nothin peculiar about two dudes just.

JOEL: Shootin the shit I guess. As one does.

MAK: *HE SEES NOTHING WRONG WITH THIS.* yeah! you get it! *another shoulder pat for joel. congratulations.*

JOEL: *runs his hand down his face* Sounds familiar enough to run along with it I guess. How else do you make buds bro.

MAK: suppose i can think of other ways... me and auryhn like to tussle from time-to-time. that's a fun way to bond, eh? *looks thoughtful as he starts ambling back towards the road.*

JOEL: Yeah sure. Tusslin with your guy friends. Cant see me turning down a challenge. *He sure loves dying and being dead.*

MAK: *eyes emoji. he can tell joel is being sarcastic, but he figures he's just being a grump for no reason.* that's when we'll do next time, then!

JOEL: Alright. *deepest internal sigh about all of this* But dont go challengin me unannounced.

MAK: sure thing, mate! i wouldn't wanna get the drop on ya. i want a prepared opponent in tip top shape. *snickers, waving and crossing the road towards his fence.*

MAK: take it easy on your way back to... well, wherever you're headed.

JOEL: Thanks man. *kicks some dirt aside*

JOEL: ...

JOEL: Anyway. Bye. *and heads his way down the road.*

MAK: *what a goofy guy. watches joel go for a while just to make sure he's alright before he bounces back home himself.*

[dragonrant]

chicken nugget lollipop

[...]

speaking of cocksuckers... chicken nugget lollipops !!!

new creepypasta: chicken nugget lollipops. there's a knock on your front door. chick-fil-a advert cow appears with more chicken nugget lolli

"i am asecual i never | Actual L. Dragon (1218 BC - [the inevitable heat death of the universe]) Beloved dragon, aeronaut Never ate the chicken nugget lollipop

if a cake pop is like really dense with cake and frosting inside, is a chicken pop just like really dense chicken?

dense chicken? you're telling me you're making chicken nugget lollipops out of the chickens you find least intelligent? that sounds not good

when i go down in history i want it to either be from the time when... when i invented the chicken nugget lollipop

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a chicken nugget lollipop? but here's the kicker: the center is full of ketchup! Yum!

die doing what you love: biting into a chicken nugget lollipop to get to the savory ketchup-filled center

next time i get mad at someone im gonna call them a chicken nugget lollipop and theyr gonna be like wtf and i will explain, then get stabbed

people would buy the chicken nugget lollipop if labeled as a cocksucker and regarded as a novelty item. buy in bulk. even better.

THE WORLD HAS A RIGHT TO KNOW ABOUT THE CHICKEN NUGGET LOLLIPOP! I WILL BE THE JOHNNY APPLESEED OF THE CHICKEN NUGGET LOLLIPOP!

giant chicken nugget lollipops sold at amusement parks

ugh yeah that guy's awful he's such a [looks at smudged writing on hand] chicken nugget lollipop

Don't you dare insult me or my eight billion chicken nugget lollipops ever again.

If all I do is talk about Star Wars and chicken nugget lollipops for the rest of my life, I will be entirely content.

i will only say "chicken nugget lollipop" if there is enough room or when appropriate. for now, this chicken emoji [chicken emoji] will mean "cocksucker"

[chicken emoji] works on mobile as well ok im set

the only other direct mention of chicken nuggets before the era of the chicken nugget lollipop. do i stand by my word? i'm just not sure. {rt:  I would never pass up an opportunity to put chicken nuggets into my body.}

i could say chicken lollipop for the same concept, but it's like saying cow lollipop when you mean beef. but people just don't say poultr...

...y very much when talking about eating chickens. they just say it's chicken. so saying a beef lollipop makes you think of like a weird ...

...umami sucker, which is pretty gross, but not an interesting visual. and if you just say chicken lollipop you might think maybe it coul...

[ok maybe this will work | cont] ...d be shaped like a chicken? so that just doesn't set a clear image as to what i'm getting at. but chi...

...cken nugget lollipop. now if you think about it for more than a couple seconds you're kinda just like ok so like a chicken nugget on a...

... stick (it's actually so much more than that but let's move on) but in those first few moments you're immediately combining the idea o...

...f poultry with memories of sweets. it's unsettling. yet you year for more information. like, a follow-up story? and explanation? but t...

...here is none. only chicken nugget lollipops. ...

... and there you have it. the art of describing cocksuckers.

i googled "chicken nugget lollipops" and it just gave me either "fancy"-looking breaded chicken on a stick or basically a kabob-like thing

i will change this. i will take the internet by storm. *pulls up photoshop, cracks knuckles*

chicken nugget lollipop. it's a lolli. u still lick it, or at most nibble at it. a bit like ice cream, except it's lukewarm.

not shown in image: ketchup-filled center #chickennuggetlollipop

probably should have introduced the #chickennuggetlollipop hashtag about 12 hours ago... and yet...

alright [chicken emoji] i gotta skedaddle is the doctor right about me dying if i don't sleep? i may never know. but [chicken emoji] gives my life new meaning.

#tbt #chickennuggetlollipop {rt:  speaking of cocksuckers... chicken nugget lollipops !!!}