#but SOMEWHERE in the sea of reblogs is someone who apparently hates me

[cryoverkiltmilk]

If the best part of any character's corruption arc is their cool new outfit, then I am due for a shopping trip.

[allthefilmsiveseenforfree]

Dear Evan Hansen

You may have seen some ~online discourse~ about the film Dear Evan Hansen, an adaptation of the 2016 Broadway musical, and you might have wondered what all the hubbub is about. I mean, it’s a feel good story about a senior in high school, Evan Hansen (Ben Platt), who has some pretty severe anxiety and depression. While trying to fulfill an assignment from his therapist to write a letter to himself, his letter gets picked up by another student, Connor (Colton Ryan) - and later that day, Connor kills himself. Connor’s grieving parents and sister Zoe (Amy Adams, Danny Pino, and Kaitlyn Dever) are desperate to learn more from the boy they think was Connor’s best friend - after all, Connor’s suicide note was a letter addressed to “Dear Evan Hansen.” And, as you can imagine, Evan tells them about the unfortunate mistake and sits with them in their grief as they struggle to pick up the pieces of their lives. 

Just kidding! He lies to them, repeatedly, elaborately, expansively for months, constructing an entire false friendship with Connor that never happened, and ingratiating himself into the wealthy nuclear family he never had, in large part because he wants to get into Zoe’s pants! THIS IS THE PROTAGONIST OF THE STORY. Oh, and it’s a musical so there is a lot of singing and crying and singing WHILE crying and sometimes crying and not singing at all. But the #inspiration, you guys. 

Things I liked:

Pretty much everything but the story and Ben Platt’s performance. The supporting cast is stacked, and all of them do a great job at elevating material scraped directly out of a diaper worn by someone who just chewed their way through a copy of the DSM-5. 

A couple of the songs are damn catchy - “Waving Through a Window” and “You Will Be Found” are standouts for a reason - and here’s the thing, Platt sings them well. But as you’ll discover, there’s a lot more to a movie musical than just singing your part. 

Stephen Chbosky, the man behind every deep thought I and a lot of people in my generation had in 2006 after he wrote The Perks of Being a Wallflower, is a pretty good director. I particularly enjoyed the fanvid-type cuts in “Waving Through a Window” in conjunction with the lyrics, and his use of interstitial shots to flashbacks (and sometimes flashforwards!) is a neat little bit of shorthand that I thought was used sparingly enough to be effective. 

Amy Fucking Adams. She’s holding on so hard, so desperately to the idea of who her son could have been, rather than the reality of who he was, and she is full of such deep pain that is masked by an almost endless supply of patience with Evan and relentless positivity. All this made me want was Enchanted 2 even worse than I already did. 

Super into everything Zoe wears - the costuming department did a great job, and now all I want to do is live in mom jeans and baggy sweaters.

Did I Cry? I teared up a couple of times because I’m not a completely heartless bastard and when Amy Adams offered Evan Connor’s college money, my heart broke for the lie Evan had thrust upon her, and Julianne Moore’s song got me good, because she’s just a single mom to Evan who is doing her goddamn best. 

Things I hated more than the time I dropped a frozen gallon container of fruit cocktail on my pinkie toe in my parents’ garage and it turned black and I thought it was gonna fall off:

Ben Platt is 28 years old. He originated the role of Evan Hansen on Broadway, so in many respects it makes sense that he plays the role in the movie, except for the one kinda sorta important thing where he looks like a wizened old crone standing amongst a sea of children doing his best twitching, cringing Hunchback of Notre Dame impression. If you want someone to convincingly play 20 years their junior, hire Paul Rudd. Otherwise, please don’t ask me to believe that this supposed 18-year-old has crow’s feet. 

And that twitching nervous energy is a huge part of the black hole at the center of this film - he’s playing to the cheap seats and walking through the halls of his high school like a wet chihuahua. It’s an excruciating acting choice to watch - he doesn’t just have anxiety, he is on the verge of a nervous breakdown seemingly every second of every day. Like honestly, where is only-mentioned-never-seen Dr. Sherman, because this young man’s meds are NOT WORKING DR. SHERMAN. 

There’s such a lack of self-awareness on behalf of the writing, directing, and performance by Platt. There’s one song, “Sincerely, Me,” that offers the only glimpse of commentary about what Evan is doing, by pointing out the malicious ridiculousness of him writing a series of fake emails as proof of his and Connor’s friendship. 

Also what high schoolers email this much?? I know this was written in probably 2014 or so, but has a bitch never heard of a text? Even a DM? This whole plot is constructed around the premise that high schoolers are just constantly, constantly emailing each other. 

Everything - and I mean EV-ER-Y-THING - about Evan’s relationship with Zoe is so creepy and disturbing that with a soundtrack change, this could easily be a horror movie. He attempts to get her to like him by describing to her all the things her brother noticed about her - oh wait, I’m sorry, all the things HE noticed about her while he was skulking in the shadows following her around for years, watching every move she made, and it ends with him singing repeatedly “I LOVE YOU” because following a girl around and never having a conversation with her or knowing her at all is love, right? This was clearly written by the same people who chose “Every Breath You Take” as their wedding song because Sting is hot and they never actually listened to the damn words. 

And it gets about 10 billion times worse when Zoe goes to Evan’s house alone, takes him up to his room, and sings “I don’t need reasons to want you” and that was the moment I was that person I hate in a movie theater and I pulled out my phone to Google who wrote the music and lyrics to the musical (we were in the back row of the theater no one was behind me THIS WAS AN OUTRAGE EMERGENCY) and of motherfucking course it was written by Benj Pasek and Justin Paul, 2 men who heard about meeting an actual human woman from a friend one time but otherwise are unfamiliar with the concept. 

Lastly, enormous serial killer vibes from Evan sending unlabeled flash drives anonymously through the mail with no note in an attempt to right his wrongs. That’s not catharsis, that’s how the next installment in the Saw franchise starts, with Evan in a Billy the clown doll mask showing up on the screen and asking if you want to play a fucking game. 

Also, I know it’s not possible for the narrative to justify this in a way that could be satisfying based on Evan’s actions, but what is with this thing where single working-class mom Julianne Moore is turning down rich people’s money for Evan to go to college? Like, obviously we can’t have that happen in the movie but in real life, fuck your pride! Take those rich people’s money!

I also know how movies work but nothing annoys me more than a giant group of high schoolers all getting beeps and boops to indicate text notifications all at the same time because I don’t know a single person under the age of 55 who keeps their ringer on. That shit is on vibrate AT MOST, and I feel like that’s a millennial thing. 

The emotional climax of the film is obviously Evan’s WAY TOO LATE confession, but the idea that it’s prompted by Connor’s family suddenly getting a lot of internet hate is, frankly, laughable. If Sandy Hook taught me one thing, it is that no tragedy is immune from trolls who live only to cause other people devastating emotional pain on the internet. That shit starts day 1. Apparently no one involved in this production has ever been on Twitter?

Also it feels like there should have been a dog somewhere in this movie and there was no dog, so points off for that too. 

Perhaps Dear Evan Hansen isn’t nearly as deep as it aspires to be. Perhaps it’s a morality play, a simplistic message of “Don’t lie, kids, lying is bad!” Major studio movies wrap themselves up with a nice bow at the end so everyone can feel good about themselves and leave with a happy ending, but the moronic cruelty on display here makes that feat feel impossible. We’re left with Evan in an orchard, reading Connor’s favorite books and staring into the big blue sky with all the self-actualization he’s earned now as a lil treat. And if Evan Hansen looked like an actual 18-year-old, it would be a lot easier to extend more empathy to him and his not-fully-developed prefrontal cortex, but it’s a little harder with this fully-grown, weathered man who was old enough to remember seeing Liar Liar in theaters. 

Dear Evan Hansen, 

Get some actual help and a haircut and maybe you can grow up enough to have an actual healthy interaction with any other living person, ever.

Sincerely, 

Me

If you liked this review, please consider reblogging or subscribing to my Patreon! For as low as $1, you can access bonus content and movie reviews, or even request that I review any movie of your choice.

[setsureadsshit]

Lost At Sea: A List of WIP’s I am finally letting go of [ Part 5 ]

[ Part 1 ] [ Post 2 ] [ Post 3 ] [ Post 4 ]

*see posts 1-4*

I’ve had this sitting in my drafts for.....probably half a year now, it was a project I took up at the start of the Covid and then I, like the rest of the world, sort of lost interest in everything for a little while. And then I threw myself into projects I could do around the house and hanging out with my housemates and slowly mourning our lost year. So, here’s THE LIST. And uh. Yeah.

The Soldier In The House Of Birds by Bonnie131313

Summary: A young acolyte finds himself paired with a young soldier

Last Update: 2018

Fandom & Main Pairing: Person Of Interest ; Rinch

Personal Notes: I really wanted to like this fic, I really wanted to but just...something about the style of the writing just doesn’t grab me. But like, I KNOW it’s really good, I can tell it’s well thought out even if it’s not finished but I just can’t...get into it and I’m letting it go.

Sucker For The Classics by nisolex

Summary: Scott was such a bad friend. Stiles only agreed to go on this stupid "pack bonding" trip so he and Scott could spend some time togehter. And what does Scott do? He invites Allison: and he gives her Stiles' seat in the car. Now Stiles is stuck in the Camaro for a 6 hour car ride with Derek Hale. This is gonna be a long week.

**With the show coming to an end, I wanted to write a Sterek fic to take us back to the beginning. This is an ode to the classic Teen Wolf fanfics. It will feature tropes as old as time, and is set sometime around season 3. If nothing else, get ready for some nostalgia, angst, and eventual sexy times.

Last Update: 2018

Fandom & Main Pairing: Teen Wolf ; Sterek

Personal Notes: Ah man, this fic is so good and tbh it leaves off at a moderately satisfying spot so still worth a read.

Where the lost get found by Ninjanervana

Summary:  The Nogitsune took a lot of things from Stiles: Allison, his peace of mind, his consent, his sanity, even his Spark. Maybe it’s time for Stiles to start taking things back.

Last Update: 2019

Fandom & Main Pairing: Teen Wolf ; Sterek

Personal Notes: I’d hold onto this - if all 7 chapters hadn’t all been posted at the same time and there hasn’t been so much as a peep since. Which is sad because it’s REALLY good but I have a harder time holding onto things that don’t have an update track record I can fall back on you know?

Can’t Hide From The Moonlight by Flarrow

Summary: The semi-unintended sequel to Might As Well Be the Sun, by reader request. One take, a potential telling of part of their married life together.

Last Update: 2016

Fandom & Main Pairing: The Flash ; Flarrow

Personal Notes: I just recently reblogged the first part of this series because I didn’t realize I hadn’t until I checked this, lol. The first one is really good, you should read it! A bummer this second part has kind fallen to the wayside but you know how it goes.

carpe diem by imadoki

Summary: The trials and tribulations that one Tsukishima Kei faces in the events leading up to spring graduation.(aka they're all third years and Tsukishima just wants to give Hinata his second gakuran button but there's a whole bunch of feelings in the way)

Last Update: 2015

Fandom & Main Pairing: Haikyuu!! ; Tsukihina

Personal Notes: I really love this idiot pairing. There...aren’t really any Hinata pairings I don’t like, he’s just so shippable, lmao. It’s a bummer that this one didn’t really get off the ground, it’s always so interesting seeing this pairing from Tsuki’s side of things.

Condo In The Woods by Strangeredlantern

Summary:  Scott gets here in four weeks, hopefully bringing some supernatural answers with him. That leaves Stiles four weeks to figure out Isaac. Why he’s here in Bear Valley, why he’s a werewolf, and why his eyes changed from blue to gold and back again not fifteen hours ago over Camden Lahey’s dog tags.

Last Update: 2014

Fandom & Main Pairing: Teen Wolf ; Stisaac

Personal Notes: I HAVE HELD ONTO THIS FIC. FOR SO FUCKING LONG. IF YOU CAN’T TELL. I REALLY FUCKING LOVE IT, I HAVE HOPED AND HOPED AND HOPED FOR SO LONG AND I AM SO GUTTED TO FINALLY BE GIVING UP ON IT. I LOVED IT. I STILL LOVE IT. STRANGEREDLANTERN, IF YOU’RE OUT THERE, IF YOU SEE THIS, KNOW THAT THERE IS ONE PERSON ON THIS EARTH WHO LOVED YOUR STORY. WHO STILL LOVES YOUR STORY. WHO HOPES YOU’RE HAVING A GOOD LIFE AND STILL WRITING SOMEWHERE.

Dead To Rights by askanasshole

Summary: Stiles is picky when he chooses his jobs. Can't hurt anyone, can't end the world, can't end with him a different species or trapped in an alternate dimension. Can't be face to face. Simple. Easy. Necessary. 

Of course his entire life goes to shit when he's forced into a face to face with a werewolf pack stupid enough to get their Second's heart stolen by a witch. Now if their Alpha would stop being so stupidly hot and he could get this job over with, that'd be great.

Last Update: 2015

Fandom & Main Pairing: Teen Wolf ; Sterek

Personal Notes: I really enjoyed this, it was such a wildly different take on things, I was really interested to see where it was gonna go. Sad to be finally throwing in the towel on it.

Destiny Knows Best by TaliskerMortem

Summary: It was supposed to be just an ordinary one-night stand. A quick tumble in the sheets and then good-bye. Derek’s wolf however, had other plans.

OR: The one in which Derek and Stiles do the do and a certain part of Derek’s wolfish anatomy decides they should be bonded for life.

Last Update: 2018

Fandom & Main Pairing: Teen Wolf ; Sterek

Personal Notes: Again, the start was pretty promising and it kinda leaves off in a satisfactory way even unfinished but I’m not interested in it enough to keep holding on it.

Dirty Dealing by lookslikenico, winglesswarrior

Summary:  Stiles had a plan for his final summer before college. He was going to intern at the Sheriff's station, get ahead on the plans for the rest of his life. Unfortunately, his dad had some hazy idea of him having 'one last summer' as a lazy teenager. Now, he's stuck cooling his heels and feeling very out of place at some stuck up country club, where he feel he has more in common with the staff than the other members. Of course, that could be because the staff include his new 'how have we never met before' best friend Scott and the 'it should be physically impossible for someone to be that perfect' new crush, Derek. Who apparently hates him - but not enough that he won't swallow his pride and put up with Stiles' presence when he's needed to help get Erica out of trouble...

Last Update: 2016

Fandom & Main Pairing: Teen Wolf ; Sterek

Personal Notes: I honestly don’t remember anything about this fic. So. Enter at your own risk.

[mollymauk-teafleak]

baby, you’re like lightning in a bottle (chapter two)

Huge thanks to my beta readers @spiky-lesbian and @minky-for-short!

Please reblog or leave a comment on Ao3! Really makes my day!

Chapters : 1, 2

-------

First rule of thieving, hiding something under the floorboards is as bad as putting it on a pedestal surrounded by flashing lights. First rule of thieving, don’t just have one planned exit, have ten. First rule of thieving, a smile and a joke can open some doors money can’t. First rule of thieving, doors are merely suggestions. First rule of thieving, be in bed before ten or I’m taking your comms off you, Pete, don’t try me.

Peter ran through every rule he could remember, every little pearl of wisdom or dry sarcasm he’d ever heard Mag say, smugly while they were on a job that was going well, whispered while they were sneaking through somewhere they weren’t supposed to be and had to be quiet, panted breathlessly as they were fleeing the scene of the crime, pronounced with a soft fondness back home after a successful gig, Peter sat reading at Mag’s feet, Mag’s hand coming down on his shoulder to give it a proud squeeze. Hundreds of first rules and he’d remembered them all.

And not a single one justified what he was doing right now.

He’d fallen behind the Steel twins as they walked through the corridors, Ben sometimes throwing a smile over his shoulder to him, Juno doing the same with suspicious scowls. Everything Peter Nureyev had been taught told him to go back the other way, find somewhere quiet to sit amongst the other students and play the role he’d built so fastitiously and shown off so proudly, promising to do a good job. And then, as soon as the day ended, he could begin the real work. Done in three days, back on Brahma before the week was out. Back home, clutching the proof that he was ready to do whatever it might take to fight for his planet.

And maybe make the weight on his shoulders a little lighter.

So why was he following these guys, one of whom seemed to actively despise him, going who knew where to do who knew what? Peter hadn’t quite figured that out yet, in spite of his growing army of doubts. And he wasn’t turning back either.

“I thought we were going to lunch?” he ventured, like he could just ask the right questions and he’d realise why his brain appeared to have fallen out the back of his skull, “Isn’t the cafeteria back that way?”

Ben gave a twirl and walked backwards so he could answer, apparently not caring if he crashed into anything, trusting Juno would jerk him out of the way, “It is. But us cool kids have a way better place to eat.”

“Where?” Peter asked apprehensively. He now realised they’d moved into corridors with empty, silent classrooms, with no other students loitering against the walls. Had he walked right into some trap? Were they about to jump him? Ben had a nice smile, he’d hate to have to shatter it.

“You’ll see,” Ben only grinned mysteriously, before Juno roughly yanked him back the right way so he would see he’d been about to but his foot right in a janitor’s bucket.

Peter sighed and shifted his backpack so he’d be able to free his knife more easily. So much for making friends and blending in. Maybe this would teach him to stick to the goddamn plan.

Luckily he wasn’t planning to stick around until detention.

Eventually they reached the very far corner of the school and saw two other students standing by a fire exit. One was an almost comically tall young man, taller even than Peter, long dreadlocks pulled back from his face by a band, both jeans and shirt ripped in places and stained with what looked like machine grease. The other was a girl with her black hair cut short and rather severe, the plain clothes and tight line of her jaw making her look thoroughly like someone not to be messed with.

Ben gave a shout of delight as soon as he saw them and took off at a run, throwing himself into the arms of the tall kid, who caught him and immediately kissed him fiercely, a little more than two people with an audience should really kiss.

Juno groaned and the girl rolled her eyes, saying, “You guys have only been apart for one period, you do realise that? You don’t have to act like one of you was lost at sea.”

“You know what they’re like, Sasha,” Juno grunted, approaching at a much more leisurely pace.

“Disgusting?”

“Hey!” Ben drew back, the tall boy’s face now thoroughly stained with his lipstick, “An hour’s a long time, it’s relative!”

“I’m your fucking relative,” Juno shot back, “And making me watch you suck Mick’s face every five seconds ought to be some kind of crime.”

“Since when have we cared what’s a crime and what isn’t?” the tall guy, evidently Mick, asked with an endearing sincerity.

“Speaking of which, let’s get going,” the girl, Sasha, got to her feet, “I’m starving.”

Peter stood, waiting for one of them to ask who the hell he was or what he thought he was doing here. They all interacted with the practised ease he’d seen in people who’d known each other for a very long time, who’d been through a lot together and had proven trust to be easily traded back and forth. And he was the outsider, the unfamiliar face. Not a feeling he was unaccustomed to, not by a long shot, but he was used to it coming along with hostile looks and questions.

But neither Sasha nor Mick even questioned his presence. Mick was far more preoccupied with Ben in his arms and Sasha merely glanced at him and then at Juno. Juno’s frown only deepend and his eyes went to Ben accusingly. To Sasha, that seemed to answer everything.

Peter kept his face impassive, like he hadn’t seen any of it. Though his heart seemed to sit lower in his chest than before.

“If you’re done scarring us all?” Juno raised an eyebrow at Mick and Ben.

“Sure,” Ben smiled primly and hopped back onto his own two feet, addressing Peter now, “There’s security guards that patrol the grounds but they’re lazy and their routines are so obvious it’s really embarrassing. All we have to do is run from here to the fence, jump it and be gone in five minutes. Easy peasy, yeah?”

Peter could only stand there and gape, “And...this is us going to lunch?”

Ben gave a bark of laughter, punching him in the arm again. He seemed to do that a lot.

“I love this guy! Hey, all you gotta do is keep up. Eyes on us, keep moving and you’ll be fine.”

Sasha already had the fire door open to the strange but not entirely unexpected absence of any alarm. She poked her head through the small gap, looking this way and that with a practised, almost military eye that Peter would envy if he wasn’t so sure of himself.

“Okay, it’s all clear. Let’s move,” she motioned them through, taking off at a run.

Ben and Mick followed, hand in hand. For a few moments it was just him and Juno, Peter wondering awkwardly if he should say something and what that something might be until the chance was gone and Juno ran after his friends without even a glance in his direction.

Last chance. He could turn and walk in the opposite direction now, the smoothest extraction he was likely to get. He could just avoid them tomorrow, get his head down, focus on his job and, after that, he’d never see any of them again. It wouldn’t matter.

And there was something about that fact that Peter couldn’t stand. So he ran.

Peter had learned a long time ago that he’d never win if the contest was purely based on strength so he’d gotten very good at running and running fast. And over the cracked, hard baked playing fields that were more crumbling dirt than actual grass, he practically flew towards the tall, barbed wire topped fencing that surrounded the school and made it look more like a prison than anything Peter had seen in streams about high school. By the time he was close enough to see, he caught Mick’s sneaker disappearing behind one of the buildings that surrounded the school, mostly businesses long closed down and housing with boarded up windows. And Juno had just reached the bottom of the fence and the scrabby, overgrown bushes that fringed it, ready to jump.  

In his head, Peter had been keeping a count ever since Ben had told them they had five minutes to make their escape. First rule of thieving, time is your best friend and your worst enemy so know how to keep an eye on it. There was just over a minute remaining.

With a grace that startled Peter, Juno scaled the fence, stamping down the barbed wire with one boot so he could lever himself over without so much as snagging his tights. He was just about to start on his way down when the two of them froze simultaneously at the same sound, above the distant noise of the city and the roads and the faint hollering from the school. These were voices, much more immediate, much closer, just from the other side of the wilting shrubbery. And getting closer by the second.

Juno cursed gruffly and eyed Peter, scrawny, anxious newbie Peter Ransom, just coming to the bottom of the fence, still with a climb and a tangle of rusty but still wicked metal to content with. For a moment, it was crystal clear what was about to happen. Juno would give him one last sneer then drop to the other side and run, leaving Peter to be caught by the security guards and dragged to detention. It was the only thing that made sense.

But it seemed like Peter wasn’t the only one who wasn’t following the rules. After half a beat, he held out his hand, reaching down to the guy he’d been growling at all day.

“Will you hurry up?” he snapped, voice an angry hiss but his arm outstretched.

Peter’s eyes widened, having to pause and check he was actually seeing what he thought he was seeing. And then he frowned.

Quick as a squirrel, he dug his fingers into the links of the fence and scrambled up without so much as a stumble, moving so swiftly and deftly that all he had to do was vault himself over the wire and land with all the flair of a gymnast. And then it was Juno’s turn to drop his jaw.

“Will you please hurry up?” Peter asked politely before running in the direction he’d seen Mick go.

Not the smartest thing he’d ever done. Definitely one of the smuggest. Hardly in character. But Peter couldn’t deny that the look in Juno’s eyes and the half second before he heard him climb down and run after him was incredibly satisfying.

Apparently what that daring escape had been in service of was an abandoned alleyway that the friends had turned into some kind of fort. Crates had been stacked up like walls, a sagging tarpaulin that looked like it had once been part of a display on a storefront would keep off the simulated rain, ratty fabrics had been strung up between the crates and another fence, shielded with broken down cardboard boxes provided seating and a trash can that had clearly held many fires inside it’s buckled and blackened skin was set down in the centre.

When Nureyev arrived, Ben and Mick were already sharing one of those improvised hammocks. Ben laughed in delight when he saw him duck under the roof that still advertised 50% off who knew what.

“I knew you’d make it!” Ben grinned, nearly tipping both him and Mick onto the filthy ground in his eagerness to give Peter a high five.

“I saw how fast you were running,” Mick agreed, gripping the neck of his boyfriend’s sweatshirt and the fence so he didn’t tumble, “That was way cool.”

“He did fine,” behind Peter came a sour growl that told him Juno had entered just behind him. If he’d been hoping for some kind of grudging respect or acceptance after what happened back at the fence, it was clear he’d be disappointed, “Where’s Sasha?”

“Getting lunch,” Ben collapsed back against Mick’s chest, either not seeing or deliberately ignoring his twin’s foul mood.

Juno grunted, collapsing into a hammock of his own. Peter realised he should take a seat too but he wasn’t sure where exactly. It was pretty impressive, as far as dens made of garbage in dank smelling alleyways went. Clearly they’d been coming here a long time, improving it slowly over time, adding and expanding. But something about it’s cobbled together half comforts reminded Peter too much of years he’d rather forget. Years when places like this had been all he’d had to call home.

But that was Peter Nureyev’s past, not Peter Ransom’s. Ransom didn’t have a lifespan beyond nine am that morning and three pm on Friday. Outside of that handful of days, he didn’t exist. As long as he wore that name, he didn’t have those memories.

So he sat himself down on an overturned trash can, folding his legs under himself and pretending to listen while Ben teased his brother, Juno bit back, and Mick interjected occasionally with his unique kind of empty headed sincerity.

Almost ten minutes passed and Sasha didn’t return though no one but Peter seemed to notice.

Eventually he cleared his throat, “Uh...there’s ten minutes before next period.”

“And?” Juno raised an eyebrow.

Ben rolled his eyes at his brother and shrugged to Peter, “We’ve always seen our schedules more as suggestions than hard and fast rules, y’know? We’ll slip in sometime before the last lesson. No one notices as long as you come back at some point.”

Peter bit his lip. He wasn’t sure how he felt about a plan that was optional. Whenever he was given a place to be and a time to be there, he took it seriously. Thieves who didn’t soon found themselves in prison. Or, on Brahma, worse. Even now, years since he’d lacked the skills to avoid it, he felt his chest tighten and a creeping sense of alarm making him glance nervously at the sky around nine at night. That was the curfew imposed by New Kinshasa.

“You can head back if you want? We don’t mind?”

Mick’s voice had quietened and, for the first time since he’d met him, his eyes weren’t on Benzaiten. He was letting the brothers continue their squabbling and looking to Peter instead, his eyes concerned and kind.

Peter swallowed and shook his head. As deep in as he already was, he’d rather stay amongst the people who smiled at him like that. And it wasn’t like there was much to preserve in Peter Ransom’s attendance record, seeing as he wouldn’t exist in a week.

Eventually Sasha reappeared again, coming right over the fence and dropping into their midsts, holding paper bags in both hands. On them was the logo for a fast food joint Peter always saw in streams but had never made it to the backwater planets like Brahma.

“They really should invest in better security. They’re a gazillion cred company, you’d think they’d be able to afford a guard on the door,” she tossed her short hair and started distributing parcels that smelled of grease, salt and unhealthy levels of goodness.

“Hope not,” Juno mumbled around a mouthful of meat and cheese, “I’m not about to start paying for this crap.”

“Food only tastes good if it’s free,” Ben nodded in agreement.

Sasha dropped one of the bags in Nureyev’s lap, “Sorry, I didn’t know what you liked so I just went for a cheeseburger and fries. That okay?”

Peter had to remind himself of his current last name to chase away the tightness in his throat. Peter Ransom had never gone hungry. Peter Ransom had never spent days not knowing where his next meal was coming from. Peter Ransom had no reason to want to cry at someone just handing him food like he was worthy of it.

“Yeah, that’s great. Thanks.”

The rest of it was all in jokes Peter didn’t understand, references to people he didn’t know and places he’d never been. Mick seemed to do a lot of the talking, he had a storyteller’s kind of cadence and a way of gesturing as he spoke to snag attention easily. Peter had heard enough bullshit in his life and had studied enough about Hyperion to not believe a single word of the rambling anecdotes he told but they were kind of comforting. So he stayed silent, ate and listened to descriptions of people and places that didn’t exist, letting the food and the scent of the cigarettes they lit warm him through.

He was so lost in it, it took Ben three attempts to get him to answer and he found himself jumping guiltily, “Sorry, what?” First rule of thieving, always be aware even if you don’t look like it. Especially if you don’t.

“I asked if you wanted to come to this party tomorrow night, one of the kids from my math class has their parents out of town and they said anyone’s cool to come,” Ben smiled encouragingly. He hadn’t taken a cigarette when they’d been passed round. Peter knew if he focused and thought, he’d have been able to work out why but something about that seemed wrong now.

Instead he bit his lip and answered, “Sure. Yeah, that sounds fun.” He could just say he was sick when the time came.

“Awesome! Anyway, what do you have last period, we’ll tell you where to head once we get back.”

Peter fished for the now creased and folded schedule he’d been given that morning, “Uh...Earth History?”

“No way!” Ben’s grin widened, “So does Juno! You guys can walk over there together and he can show you his notes. They’re shit but it’s a start.”

Over in his corner, Juno coughed and hacked for a reason that didn’t have anything to do with his cigarette. He shot Ben a scandalised look, thin grey trails trickling from his nose, “Benzaiten…”

Unconcerned, he met Juno's eyes. It really was scary how similar they were, past the dyed hair and the piercings, how they could hold the exact same fierceness. Benten just did it more subtly.

“What? That’s your class. Ransom doesn’t know where he’s going and he’s never taken the subject before. Why wouldn’t you help him?”

There was a tense moment, where Sasha and Mick shared an anxious look and Peter wanted to shrink down into his oversized shirt and disappear. But it was only a moment. Juno looked away with his jaw set in resignation and Ben continued smiling like nothing had happened. He just jumped up, pulling Mick along with him.

“So! Let’s head back.”

The way back was far more leisurely than their breakneck escape. No one cared when you were coming back to the place you were supposed to be.

Still seething, Juno put as much distance as he could between himself and Peter without being belligerently obvious about it. Which was all well and good, if you believed distance was the only factor in someone overhearing you. If you believed the kid you were mad at for some inexplicable reason was just a regular kid and not someone who’d been trained in finding out things people didn’t want him to know since the age of six.

Back in school, with the corridors silent except for the muffled noise behind the classroom doors, Mick and Sasha went off in their own directions, leaving just the three of them. Seeing that Juno clearly had no intention of walking to Earth History with him, Peter just gave them both a quick goodbye, saving grace by saying he needed to get something from his locker before class started.

He didn’t even know where his locker was.

From around the corner, tucked into the space between two banks of the regular metal cupboards, Peter could hear every word of the brothers’ conversation.

Almost as soon as he’d gone beyond the corner, he heard Juno round on his twin, “What the fuck is your-”

“I was going to ask you the same thing!” Benten didn’t let him finish, his voice tenser than it had ever been in front of Peter, “God, Juno, the kid’s done nothing wrong! He just needs some friends and you’re acting like such a bitch!”

“Come on,” Juno sounded uncomfortable in the face of Ben’s exasperation. Peter got the feeling, just from his voice, that upsetting his twin wasn’t something he made a habit of, “It’s not just that. I see the look on your face, the whole ‘ooh, Juno, why don’t you walk the new kid to class, ooh Juno let’s invite the new kid to the party’ schtick…”

“Well, enlighten me then,” Ben countered, softening a little too, “Because I’m confused. Someone showing up, looking like he does...Juno, I know you, you should have stuck your tongue down his throat by now! You’ve done it before with people way less good looking and nice than Ransom, you two would actually be good together! Is this a new weird way of flirting or something?”

In his hiding place, Peter swallowed hard and felt his face heat up. The immature thoughts he’d had when he first saw Juno made themselves known, skittering not entirely unpleasantly in his stomach. Until Juno’s words froze them.

“First off, rude. Second of all...look, I just can’t stand the guy. Something about him just...it doesn’t feel right. Like he’s hiding something. And I want to find out what it is.”

He decided he’d heard enough, walking away quickly, not even sure if it was the way he was supposed to be going or not. To his shame, Peter felt tears building hotly in his eyes. Whether it was because he’d derailed his job for a pretty face who couldn’t bear the sight of him or because he was ashamed of how he’d allowed himself to be taken in and slip up so dangerously or just because he was sick of being here where he didn’t understand anything, Peter didn’t know. But he knew what he had to do now.

He had to complete his mission and get the hell away from Mars and Juno Steel as fast as he could.

[mimzy-writing-online]

Some Blind Things I (and actual blind person) Have Done

I talk all the time about what’s realistic for a blind person to do and how to write a blind character who isn’t a complete media myth of touching faces and super powers... soooo, part of that is knowing what kind of things an actual blind person (me) fucks up doing because I’m blind.

These moments include: Me sarcastically telling people I cannot see the thing they’re doing. Moments where I have zero manners. Moments where I do have manners. Making people uncomfortable because they’re staring at me. Great phrases like, “I have too much ADHD to count to eight.” and “It’s literally illegal for me to drive.” and “Wait, who are you?” “That’s not how we talk to people Mimzy.” My cats’ growing concern that I can’t see them or tell them apart but continuing to love me. Channeling my inner Toph Bei-Fong. Updates on the ongoing insomnia writing.

There’s no chronological order to them, I’m not sure there’s going to be any order to them at all, but it’s 3 am and I can’t sleep and it’s called the Late Night Writing Advice Blog for a reason.

(I definitely did not have to double check my own blog title while typing that, definitely not)

Note: This list gets a little long, but it’s a funny read and I was up until 4:30 (this note is from a future Mimzy who’s almost finished posting this, after 1.5 hours)

Additional Note: Feel free to send anons with commentary or reblog with commentary because I would love if someone enjoyed this. Like, these are stories of my life, please appreciate them.

The Things!

-My best friend and I hang out mostly at night because of his 9-5 job, and he still lives with his parents who probably don’t like me so when we hang out we’re mostly driving around on random adventures and coffee/tea runs and late night dinners. 

So it’s night, and my night vision is awful and I have to wear sunglasses anyway because what I can see is painfully bright headlights so yeah I see basically nothing.

With my best friend, I have

1. after asking him a question: “Did you nod at me and I just didn’t see it.” “I did nod.” or after waiting long enough for a response he’ll realize what he did on his own and say, “I was shaking my head no, sorry.”

2. Reaching into total darkness to touch his shoulder and touched his armpit instead.

3. Dropped something from my bag onto his messy car floor and asked him to find it for me because it all looks blurry and grey-black down there, even without sunglasses

4. Sensed he was going for a high five and I gave him a perfect high five. Surprised, he wanted to test it again. I completely missed.

5. “We’re passing the oil refinery, so enjoy hearing, touching, smelling, tasting that.” plus 3 other identical jokes on the same drive. “Hey, can you stop making blind jokes, I’m starting to hate them these days.” “When did that happen?” “When one not-great classmate slash sort of friend made them all the time.” “That’s a shame.” “Blind jokes from sighted people are also super repetitive. The only blind jokes I seem to like are from other blind people.”

6. Him: “You’re rolling your eyes behind your sunglasses, I can tell!” 

7. Once we saw snow once our way driving home from Las Vegas. It was March, it was after midnight, and the warmest it had been at any point in that night was 40 degrees Fahrenheit (4.4 degrees Celsius. That’s a real comparison?? That’s a scary number to an American who’s barely ever left California. We were driving through the mountainy area of California where the temp really drops and for three seconds we saw snow in the wind. Well, he saw it. Something moved, it was small and flaky but like... that was actually snow and I couldn’t see it? (this was three, almost four years ago)

8. Last weekend we drove around the rich neighborhoods to look at Christmas decorations because I love Christmas lights because for ones light actually looks pretty instead of painful and I can see it at night without hurting, so it’s nice. I love the pretty visual things. Blindness will not take the pretty visual things from me! And the decorations just make me so happy and I wanted to do that last year but never did, so we did that this year

9. I also told him about the cripple punk tag on Tumblr last weekend and he was delighted to know it exists because he’s got other chronic health issues including downright awful knees.

Other blind things not directly involving my best friend

1. I have paused writing to ask a sighted person if it’s realistic for my sighted characters to see X item from Y distance away. Usually my dad with his stupidly perfect vision.

2. Realizing I’m forgetting what sighted people can see. It’s been four years since I saw like a normal person. And all my sighted memories are literally blurry from age.

3. But I still have dreams where I see normally. And then dreams where everything is too bright like in real life and I cannot see and what is happening???

At home, specifically

1. I have three cats who I can’t tell the difference between. I have a small black and brown tabby cat. A black and orange tortie cat who is slightly heavy but medium build. An all black cat who is huge and has the longest fur I’ve ever touched on a cat. I cannot tell the difference between them until I’m up close. Especially if the lighting bad.

2. Tonight I almost set my laptop on top of Remy, my brown and black tabby, because I didn’t see here a foot away from me, curled up next to my leg, somehow blending in with my orange and blue comforter. Her concerned look I did see and was horrified by my almost fuck up and apologized profusely for.

3. Cannot see Felix, my black cat, half the time if the lighting is bad and have almost sat on him, put my feet in his face, tripped over him, etc. because he blends into the shadows and oh my fucking god I cannot see that.

Note: Remy cuddles with me all the time. Felix adores me but will not be caught dead cuddling anyone because dignity, but if he’s in my room and nobody’s around to see he’s insistent on cuddling. Rio (black and orange tortie) is devoted to my mum, and she knows she makes me nervous when she suddenly jumps on me and I get really shifty and squirmy and not fun to cuddle with, so we’re cool and I give her pets but she doesn’t usually crawl onto me unless she wants to make my mum jealous.

4. Can sneak up on family members and friends because I move so quietly, so at least there’s that. Not a blind thing, but it makes up for some things.

5. Have walked up to someone I thought was a friend, realized I don’t know them, and the first thing out my mouth was “Wait, who are you?” and then a close friend (and the party host) grab me by the shoulders and say, “That’s not how we talk to people,” and just like, where are your manners Mimzy, wtf, but I never saw that stranger again so it’s okay.

Side Note: blindness aside, I do have a habit of just rudely speaking my mind in not-appropriate settings because I just don’t care and don’t have the anxiety to at least act like I care. They’re very satisfying, but usually very rare moments.

6. Please stop moving things around the house!

7. “What do you mean there are cobwebs?” *Shines a flashlight at the dark corners of my room* “oh my god...”

8. Me, to my family members, “Please close those curtains, light hurts. Please turn off that lamp, it’s too bright in here.” *me, later turns off most of the lights in the house* Family members: “Why is it so dark in here? I can’t see.” *Me, channeling my inner Toph Bei-Fong* “Oh no, what a tragedy!”

9. Mum is the only one who vaguely appreciates my light sensitivity because she also has snow vision (a mild case) and has a little light sensitivity, sometimes, on her bad days.

More Not Quite Appropriate Things!

There are so many things that I say only to realize that there is a very nearby stranger who heard that out of context and it sounded so bad.

1. Best Friend (while I’m walking down stairs just fine, by myself, don’t need anyone’s help, I can do it!) “There are eight steps.” “I don’t need your help.” “I know but--” “I’m fine!” “I’m just trying to help.” “I have too much ADHD to count to eight anyway!”

“I have too much ADHD to count to eight anyway,” is exactly what two strangers heard while walking right behind me.

Why would you sneak up on someone who’s so obviously blind??

2. “Sea foam green is an ugly color anyway.” I was in a mall, it was well lit and I was using my cane and managing with my crap vision, but I managed to see that specific color I hate on a dress right next to me, and the woman walking on the other side of the mannequin display heard that and did a double take on my obviously blind self.

Or so I’m told by my mom who could see what happened.

3. Similar to above, I was in the Artist Village in San Diego, which is a huge tourist trap, and I was sort of a tourist too, but it’s freaking outdoors, so I have the cane and sunglasses. And I’m in an Artist Village (very visual thing) with my parents, so out of place. And this random dude was apparently staring at me. Cannot see him, absolutely no idea which direction my mum is pointing towards, everything is blank and weird and not see-able, but I turned my head and by some miracle looked directly at him and he freaked out and looked away.

4. “Oh yeah, make fun of the blind person!” sarcastically, but loudly, somewhere public after a joke a friend had made that I was actually okay with.

5. “Driving and hiking are my two biggest weaknesses,” said out of context to people who didn’t know I was blind.

6. “I forgot you were blind.” “Well I didn’t.” More channeling of Toph, I think.

7. “Why can’t you drive?” *points to cane* *he does not get it* “It’s very illegal for me to drive.” *does not get it* “They’re blind dude,” classmate says. “Very blind.” “You seem to get around just fine,” says the man who only see me indoors with the very best lighting scenario for my vision. “Yeah, but that’s because I have the cane.” “So?” You seem just fine, he seems to think. How dumb are you? I definitely think. “Why do you need the cane?” “Because I would die if I didn’t have it. I have almost died. People would die if I tried to drive.”

8. Later: “Did he think you could just drive and use your cane to feel the road or something?” “I guess.”

9. More questions from other people who don’t know me very well asking why I can’t drive. “Because it’s illegal.” Their confusion is wondering specifically why it’s illegal rather than thinking I’m not actually blind. I explain the laws in the driving handbook, because I have read it (unlike some people I guess. How did you miss the ‘drivers must be able to see at least 20/40 with their best corrected eye” and I haven’t been in that category for two years.

Note: My day blindness came two years before my vision acuity reached visually impaired status. So, like, two years of wishing I had a cane but thinking “I’m not blind enough” and still being terrified in certain situations and risking my life walking around without one or some sighted guide.

Similar Public Things

1. I can see indoors pretty well so I get by on prescription glasses and no cane (I see 20/70 - 20/100 with glasses) but sometimes the mall is crowded and nobody gives me space and I’m just not comfortable getting so close to people, so I bust out my cane (and maybe my sunglasses too) so I look extra blind and people will give me the space to walk without running into someone.

2. Have also done that just because the indoor lights were also too bright and I need my sunglasses.

3. Have stared at my phone in public with cane/sunglasses, or tried taking photos with it, and I get so many weird looks because blind people see nothing I guess, none of us have any vision at all! (read sarcasm)

4. Walking into a coffee shop I’ve been to before and I know they change their teas all the freaking time. Also got the cane. “Hi, can you tell me what iced teas you have right now?” “Oh, they’re all on that sign.” *blank look* Do you not realize I’m blind? I’m thinking. “What kind of black tea do you have? Do you have any tropical black tea?” (because they usually do and I love tropical black tea, and they did that day too, so I ordered that.)

5. I cannot read menus. Those restaurants that have the menus above the register are awful, evil. Cannot read. In the wonderful days of my childhood I didn’t have prescription glasses for my moderately not great but still mostly functional vision (my dad has perfect vision and no concept whatsoever about what it’s like to not be able to see those things!) So imagine my parents dragging me to restaurants like that and I’m 10 years old and supposedly can read perfectly fine but I cannot read that menu and I think it’s some personal character fault of mine that I just don’t know how to read those kinds of menus, so I have to ask my mum to help me choose a food to order and eat, and then that’s the only thing I ever order any time I ever go back. So, I’m quickly getting sick of those places because I only eat one item there and I want to try something new with a restaurant with those nice hand held menus, but those are sit-down restaurants and apparently they cost more money, sooo...

6. That was a rant I went on with my best friend last weekend

Side note: It’s almost 4 am, my mum just woke up, saw the light on in my room from under the crack of my door and said hi. I’m at a point right now where she just expects it and isn’t one to judge (unlike my dad who has zero insomnia because he has hypersomnia and I don’t know how humans do that)

Side Note Ten Minutes Later: My laptop is at 10% but I plugged it in because dammit I am finishing this tonight and it will have all the things.

7. “Hey, where’s the trash can? I can’t find one.” *also mistakes a trashcan and a human being just sitting still. All the time* “Why not just litter then?” best friend asks, knowing exactly how I’ll respond. “I have manners!”

8. I hate traveling even a little by myself. My orientation and mobility skills with my cane aren’t that bad, but they’re not good enough for me to feel comfortable walking around by myself anywhere that isn’t super familiar with routes I already have practiced and memorized (school, close friend’s houses or apartments, the blocks in my neighborhood I’ve walked 500 times coming too and from school or walking dogs with my parents). Anywhere unfamiliar or wide/open or crowded or God Forbid, OUTSIDE is a source of terror and will not let my traveling companions leave me alone for longer than a few minutes and certainly not walk away on my own.

9. Will not go to bars because I present female and I am visibly disabled and that makes me look like an easy target and why would I risk that unnecessarily?

I’m gonna cut it off here. This is a long post, and I need to just finally go to bed. Goodnight. I hope you enjoyed it. Feel free to send anons with commentary or reblog with commentary. I’d like to know that someone liked this.

[dreadhaus-literature]

{A/N}

I~ truthfully don’t know why I came to write. I’ve just been kinda doing my own thing tonight, gave myself a manicure (would have done a pedicure too but it’s cold and I have sockies on) and otherwise was messing about in my closet. Having one of those rare restless moods where I don’t really want to do anything, but y’all know me. I can’t not do something.

So here I am. Doing something.

Uh, well first I suppose I oughta address I hyped up coming out of hiatus today and then, lmao, didn’t. I opened a document to write initially but I just wasn’t feeling FL was connected, so I went to talk to Monica about how things are going. No sense beating a dead horse, we all know what goes with FL and why stuff gets the way it does. So at this point, I’ve just set my pen down until I’m told to pick it up again. Not going to put the blog in hiatus, just don’t expect regular updates anymore, I guess? I’m finding I get discouraged trying to do this alone, so if I can’t do it with my partner, I won’t be doing it at all--and that’s coming from a place of support.

FL isn’t FL without Monica, nor should it be.

I’ll give it a few months and if things keep stagnating or I haven’t gotten a chance to write for FL anymore, I’ll take a look at other stuff to write. I don’t want to not write through 2019 like I did the past three years, I meant what I said at the start of the year.

My whole inspiration for what was going to be today’s prompt was Carol, actually--because I watched the red carpet premiere for Captain Marvel earlier tonight when it was live. Haha, I cried three fucking times. Three! First time was watching everyone SO hype for Carol, like the little girl in me could not handle seeing so many people so excited about someone I’ve loved since I was a kid. I’ve said it before, several times, but I never thought I’d get to see Carol on the big screen. Now, I get so excited I cry, lmao.

The second time I cried was when the youngest actress (who plays Carol as a little girl) was doing an interview and she said how important and special the movie was for her--again, the little girl in me could relate plus Mama Bear was all aflutter at seeing this little angel talk about how excited she was to see another female superhero get her own movie. I remember she said something, “Now every little girl in the world knows she’s special!”

Sweet Christ I’m about to get teary again remembering that. THIS IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT MOVIE. 😤

...And I cried when Brie came out, lmao. I was not ready. She wore a dress full of sunbursts/stars, for Carol’s insignia. 💖💖💖

I could not handle that, like one of Brie’s first lines during her red carpet interview was that Carol changed her life, and my heart about shattered. You can tell Brie is proud to play Carol, and she worked her ass off to be able to do so--and I have so much respect for actors who commit to these roles like that. These characters mean the world to me and I love when the actor who plays them takes that seriously. You can tell, listening to Brie, she does. It was genuine, and I have renewed respect for her and I sincerely hope she knows how much support she has for this movie, despite all the fuckhead trolls out there.

So yeah, I cried for like, an hour? Haha, no, that’s an exaggeration and even if it wasn’t, it was all happy tears. I’m just so excited about this movie and to be somewhere I never thought I’d be. It isn’t to diminish, like, Tony or Peter or Logan but I always knew there’d be Iron Man or Spider-Man or X-Men movies--but there are others, like Thor or T’Challa or Carol, who I never anticipated seeing on the big screen and it’s so huge to be here.

I’m so grateful that we are here.

I’ve kinda just been all over the comicverse today, actually, looking at stuff--well, haha, in the two biggest backyards, rather. I only really stray outside of Marvel and DC to visit Anung & Co, but y’all know me. I’ve got my faves and I stick to my familiars--which up until very recently just included Marvel, lmao. But DC’s in there now, obviously, so I do wander about there from time to time. I feel like I visit a new school or some shit every time I do this, because I recognize some folks now but I run into others and I’m just like, yeah, i have no fucking idea who you are, haha. My DC coloring book came and it was vastly different from flipping through my Marvel book; I could name every single person for my Marvel book but I think I can count on my fingers and toes the DC folks I know. BUT I AM TRYING. Haha, I am learning, and it’s fun for a lot of reasons. Say this all the time but I am grateful to Monica for getting me to stop staring down my nose at the lot of them. I was missing out.

But I uh, well I’m noticing that a lot of what I like...not a lot of other DC fans do, lmao. And I’m not going to be tooting my own horn over here--or Avery’s rather, because I gave that back to her--but I just mean, I was taken aback by how, uh, upset some DC fangirls are about things that I liked or enjoyed? And I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, it happens on the Marvel side too. People are opinionated and I usually fall to the counter-culture side of arguments. I guess because I’m a wide-eyed newbie to the DCverse, I wasn’t thinking about it. Okay, like, for example--

My first unpopular opinion is that Arthur Curry looks better in the comics than the DCEU.

“Whaaaaaat?! BUT DOT, ARE YOU SAYING JASON MOMOA ISN’T HOT?!”

I’m not here to say Jason isn’t attractive or that he doesn’t do Arthur justice--but I’mma stand here and on the same hand say Tony Stark looks better in the comics than in the MCU. One, because I’m a huge gigantic lesbian, and two, because I always think the comics look better. Like, you will never hear me say otherwise, in terms of looks. Real life cannot compete with fantasy; characters can be drawn perfectly and try as we might to emulate that in real life, we never can.

It has nothing to do with the actors, nothing to do with Jason or RDJ, it’s all about the comic character they play--which a lot of fangirls seem to forget when it comes to these live-action portrayals, might I add.

And so uh, when I wanna look at Arthur, like everyone else in the comics, I’d rather see his comic iteration. And ain’t nobody here for comic Aquaman for some reason. I never see him around and it sucks. I guess I shouldn’t judge but I do a little. Like, y’all been sleepin’ on Arthur or mocking him for fucking years and even I knew that, from my DC-hating lawn chair. But now that Jason plays him, now he’s acceptable? Now he’s okay?

Arthur is literally in the same boat as Loki, like if you don’t love them at their comicverse then you don’t get to love them in the movies. Ya don’t love Arthur, you love Jason. And I just don’t get that. Jason’s a beefcake and y’all know I’m here for some bulk but if we’re comparing looks comic Arthur is who I’m diving into the briny deep for every single day of the year.

^ LIKE THIS GIF IS SAVED IN MY PHONE LIBRARY, I LOVE IT SO MUCH how do you not find this sexy, like I am a gay woman and he could part me like the Red Sea.

Anyway.

My 2nd apparent unpopular opinion is that Edward Nygma, Mr. Riddler, looks super scrumptious in the Batman, War of Jokes and Riddles arc. I went to look at him for...reasons, earlier tonight, and I was expecting others to agree with me and was pretty stunned that everyone in the tag was making fun of him. I felt like Peter, like I went, “Riddle me this, how hot is Edward in this arc, guys, amirite?” And I held up my hand for a high five and got left hanging by the entire rest of the fandom--Monica not included because she’s above the fandom on her lofty angel cloud.

And I don’t give a shit, y’all know I hate popular things and I’m not complaining about this, I’m talking about it because I’m still not over my surprise. I’m aware I don’t like conventionally attractive types, I have this thing with unique bone structure or just unique appearances to begin with but I didn’t think Edward fell into that. I just thought he was handsome, like...at the risk of embarrassing myself but I found myself staring at him a lot during the arc when Monica was reading it to me because it was the kind of attractive that kept catching my eye. And so to hear so many people saying how ugly he looked or how they hated that iteration of him and I was like...lmao, am I missing something?? There’s every chance I am, I am very new to this party.

But I’m not new to the general premise of finding someone attractive so to look me in my retinas and tell me this--

This is not an entire look? Y’all seriously gonna hit the pass button on this particular Nygma?

This--

This is ugly, to you?

??????????

I’M NOT JUST USING QUESTION MARKS BECAUSE IT’S EDWARD I’M BEING SERIOUS, I am seriously confused by this. I see people posting photo sets of him in this arc and I wanna reblog them but they’re being shitty/sarcastic/mean about his appearance and i can’t delete OP’s unnecessary commentary.

I just can’t believe people think he looks ugly here. 😗 I can’t believe this particular opinion is an unpopular one...but whatever it’s my opinion and I’ll just sit on this island with my giant cardboard cutout of him. I don’t need y’all.

Man, and I thoroughly enjoyed that arc and so many people hated it, lmao. It may be because I’m new--actually, no. I’m not giving the fandom the benefit of the doubt for that one. Monica and I read that arc and while I didn’t have a ton of Batman history to base it on, it was solid writing and it was enjoyable to read. I think it comes down to that everyone is so quick to shit all over anything, anymore. Everyone is so fucking miserable, lmao, like it’s so chic to hate everything that’s put in front of you. It reminds me of trying to serve a toddler lunch. I can still remember trying to appease my little sister’s picky ass tummy when she was a baby, even things I knew for a fact she oughta like or that she did like, she’d smack off her high chair and cry about wanting something else--so she could repeat it when I set something new down. It’s the same fucking thing. As someone who is pretty happy with pretty much anything, it makes me anxious, like I worry everyone hating everything is gonna make content creators stop doing things. Why should they keep on, all you wanna do is bitch about anything they do? I wouldn’t write if I got that many complaints about my perfectly good stories. It’s...aggravating, why people can’t just be happy.

Which~ brings me to my third unpopular opinion, that I know Monica shares with me--BatCat sucks. Like, it’s a crappy pairing. It’s in the same boat as Peter & MJ, or Matt & Karen, or Tony & Pepper--I am not writing their dumbass ship name. I only wrote BatCat because the ship name is cute and that’s 90% because it has cat in it and I love kitties.

Anyway.

I see...so much support for this pairing and I’m like...y’all know she left him at the altar, right? Broke his heart? I really don’t care why she did it, there’s not going to be a single reason she could give that would make it okay in my book. I don’t know Selina all that well and I don’t actually dislike her like I do MJ or Karen or Pepper but I do dislike that I’ve been told she does this to him all the time. Everyone knows I have trust issues and someone flaking or betraying me constantly would drive me...haha, batty.

It’s 8AM leave me alone.

In all seriousness, it really makes me question the sort of girlfriend some girls think they are. I’m a feminist through and fucking through but that doesn’t mean I have to support shit-ass behavior and I don’t tolerate foolishness. As I said above, she could show up in a few issues and say there was some reason why she did it, some noble reason to do with Bane (seriously what the hell is he doing, I know he’s up to some shit) but you let your man know. You let your partner know, you don’t leave them hurting. There’s no fucking excuse for that. I’m a sensitive bitch and I’m 100% fine to admit that and admit that is where I’m coming from but I get so tired of women being selfish in comics, like why do you think it’s acceptable to act like this? I don’t know the nuances of Bruce and Selina’s relationship very well but like I said, I know she betrays him or leaves him a lot and that flaky shit gonna turn me off just as fast as when I saw Joker uncaring about Harley’s love. There are some things I just can’t truck with and that’s one of them.

I shouldn’t be surprised there’s so much love for this pairing, so many people are pushing for them to be married and I shouldn’t be shocked--Tony/Pepper and Peter/MJ is super fucking popular but that doesn’t...make them good pairings. You don’t treat your partner the way these women do. You just...don’t. I used to hate Bruce, h-a-t-e him, but it’s polar opposite at this point. He about did me in, initiating all those “I love yous,” and she broke his heart and I just...fwah. The fastest way to make me love you is to give me a reason to take care of you, I have learned.

Shit like these unsupportive relationships for people who give and give until they literally bleed flares my Mama Bear up bad.

I went from hating Bruce to this--

AND THERE’S NOTHING I CAN DO ABOUT IT, WHAT’S DONE IS DONE. Bruce can protect Gotham, that’s fine, but I guess my black ass finna be there when he gets home to protect him.

THIS IS WHERE WE ARE NOW.

My poor future children are fin’ta be smothered.

So yeah, I kinda went off on a tangent there and I initially...didn’t mean to, lmao. I’m sure there’s other shit I’m missing in terms of my opinions on DC, and I could go on for sixteen years about my Marvel shit, but I’ve...rambled on long enough.

Good night, my loves~♥