#but IMO at this point he's justice or judgment

[azurechicken]

It always gets me how Justice did not change at all, like, he is not corrupted at all. It makes everything more tragic than it already is. The only thing that changed was his perception, which of course, naturally came due to the change of hosts. I'm mostly taking Awakening Justice into account and how he acts because that is where we can carefully observe him by himself, without Anders' influence on the matter. And his influence is everything on the point I am trying to make.

When we first meet Justice, he is fulfilling his nature of bringing justice to the people he thinks that need it. He is very outspoken about it, and is already ready to take action with or without Warden's help. For a supposedly peaceful spirit that Anders claims to have ruined with his anger, Justice is acting pretty angry here himself (This is not the only time either). This is one of the first things I want to point out that did not change much about the spirit. Justice was always fierce about his cause. However, what stands out to me in these scenes is when the witch calls him out on his idea of justice.

Justice, is that what you are calling it? What of their punishment, burning my house to the ground and with me in it?

Well, in this case, the witch is a demon and mocking Justice for funsies. But what she says actually gives a bit more insight about what kind of a spirit Justice is. The actions do not speak louder than intent to him, as long as it is within the lines he set for himself. In a way, he was always okay with a few… casualties in the name of justice. Even though it is as simple as burning down a house this time. Isn't violence for violence vengeance after all?

While we are on the topic of vengeance, let's not forget the way he is eager on avenging Kristoff, vowing to kill every darkspawn for his cause (I mean the way he literally calls it avenging is enough debate for some people but I want to continue). So how come wanting to take revenge on the offenders that wronged not only his host but many other people, is any different? How did this route did not take him to the road of vengeance but attacking the templars, who are also offenders that wronged his host and other people, is corrupting him?

The answer is of course, that it is not, it did not. There is no difference between those two for Justice, there is no difference between vengeance and justice. Punishing the ones who deserve it is all there is. There is no gray area for spirits the way there is in the mortal world, and we see this clearly in the way he judges Velanna and Nathaniel for their crimes. Despite what I said about him seeing intent before action, now he cannot see beyond their wrongs. This simply shows that if the intent is as clear as violence for violence, he understands. But he does not understand the gray area of Velanna mistaking the innocents as guilty, or Nathaniel taking back what used to be already his.

 

There might be none for Justice, but there is a difference between darkspawn and templars for mortals. For one, darkspawn are generally mindless, and has no moral compass for us to judge. Whereas templars are just people with different ideals about life, to put it kindly at least. (Which is worse, being a mindless cruel monster, or having the mind and morals to choose to be something else but going for being one anyway? Lol another discussion for another time). Templars are the gray area that Justice lacks the understanding of. When he vows to kill every templar like he did with the darkspawn, he does not suddenly turn into a demon, he is simply punishing the ones that were doing wrong, as he does.

From here we can say that spirits' judgments and mortal's don't exactly match up. Though, there is one idea that seems to match better than others, and that is corruption. As far as we learn from Justice, spirits do not know about corruption any better than we do. Spirit do bad, spirit go bad, right? So, when Justice starts to feel things that are associated with demons, such as envy, he starts to fear corruption. He says he does not want to learn how a demon feels, but he also states that he does see the wishful thinking of a demon wanting to cross the Veil for this world. He is conflicted at best about the whole thing. Still, he does not consider himself corrupted regardless. I think that the reason behind that is simply the fact that generally, the Warden can ease his worries when Justice confides in them. And that is another thing that says a bit about him. He seems to accept the lack of understanding he has in the world, and chooses to listen to someone who does. Though, not just a random anybody, someone he deemed just.

So, let's see. A fade spirit with identity issues and an anxious spirit healer walks into a bar…

When they merged and Justice accepted Anders' cause for himself, and when they went all crazy on the Templars, Anders was scared. He feared the worst immediately because he is taught the worst about possession. He knew that Justice was angry because of him and his ideals about mages. So he blamed himself, called it a corruption he caused. And as I mentioned, Justice is accepting of the fact that he has a lack of understanding of some things. Plus, he was already scared of corruption. So, when Anders, who is an educated mage about possessions and corruption claims that he is slowly corrupting the spirit, they held onto it.

Everyone in their life from this point on, do nothing but egg them on about it, on top of it all. They might not corrupt each other, but everyone else does by pushing them the idea that they are now an abomination. Anders starts to fear the nonexistent corruption more, and Justice is confusing the inability to just wipe all the bad out with sloth. We are talking about a being who comes from the Fade, which can be bent at will and a place of immediate action. This works well in Awakening because we are already fighting darkspawn nonstop, and we are in the middle of a war. But in Kirkwall? Everything requires planning and suspended ideals. Templars bring injustice everywhere they go, yet there is not much they can do. After many years of being held back, it is no wonder Justice is surfacing more and more, itching to fulfill his purpose. Because he was always outspoken, angry at the injustice in the world and eager to bring justice. He did not change, but Anders' morals and his' just did not align the way they thought it would. They forgot that in Justice, there was always a part that was vengeance.

At the end, Justice was one of the most stable parts of Anders' story. He couldn't count his vow in Awakening complete without reaching the root of the problem, which was the broodmother. And he could not do so in Kirkwall without getting rid of the Chantry. Because chantry is the root of the Templars, and being a bystander while you can help solve everything easily is unjust all the same.

Anders and Justice had the same cause, different morality and they were just confused because they didn't know any better.

[matan4il]

Hi ! Have you watched the 2nd season of Hunters (Amazon) ? If so, have you any thoughts about the final episode ? I’m scratching my head wondering what I think of it aha

Hi Nonnie! Thank you for the ask!

I have watched it and I am TBH still processing. We're talking about some very heavy, complex and important stuff, so I don't wanna fall into the pit of rush judgment. Much like with my thoughts on s1, IMO s2 has some stuff that's good and some that I have issues with. So I need the processing to come to some more cohesive conclusions.

If I have to give a bottom line, putting aside a more in depth, nuanced discussion, I guess I would point to the fact that my fave thing about s1 is to a great degree missing in s2, and that some of the pitfalls they managed to avoid at the end of the day in s1... they didn't in s2. I'll give you one example. In case it's not obvious: spoilers!

Take the whole issue of judging the hunters. I mentioned that since there were actual real life Holocaust survivors who turned Nazi hunters, I don't feel comfortable judging them. By extension, that means I can't judge ANY of the Nazi hunters. The kid or grandchild of survivors either. And that's what Jonah is, right? Yet, that's exactly what the viewers are invited to do with the very last shot of s2 and the show overall. We just heard his wife telling him that when she looks at him, she sees his grandmother and great aunt (both Nazi hunters) and that she loves what she sees. She doesn't know, but we do, that he's lying to her at that very minute, and that their romantic getaway doubles as a cover for him spying on another Nazi criminal. The way this plays out paints him to be similar to a junky, who wants to quit but can't, and therefore ends up lying to his loved ones and destroying his own life. Is this a fair portrayal of most Nazi hunters? No. Most of the real ones actually took up Nazi hunting (in the non-legal sense) for only a few years at the end of the war, and most abandoned it in favor of re-building their own lives or helping others to do so. Yet with the last shot lingering on Jonah's face, knowing he's probably about to destroy his own marital bliss, we're being asked to look at him as his wife does and decide whether we love what we see. And while the shot itself is stunning, I personally just do not like the invitation to judge a Jewish person/character, who has lived through the horrors of the worst genocide in human history perpetrated against their own people, when there was no real justice served at the end of the war (or even within the fictional universe of Hunters s2 IMO) and judge what they decided to do about it.

So this isn't a full answers with all of the details, but I hope this helps until I can write a complete meta post? Thank you so much for writing to me about it. I am so happy for any ask regarding any and all things Jewish. Have a great day! As always, my ask tag. xoxox

[mengyao]

(not me ranting about mdzs /cql characterization takes in 2023 --)

my cross to bear is that i can't read like 90% of aus that feature NHS prominently even if they're canonverse because they make it clear the author's interpretations just do not gel with mine…

like i just don't believe that NHS would do Alla That in basically any other circumstance. the list of things he gaf enough about outside of what directly affects him/his family/loved ones is vanishingly small. he does not care about wider political contexts beyond that, especially in cql where he doesn't even end up chief cultivator at the end! i don't even mean this in a complimentary way, it can go in either direction -- people who think he was assigned supervillain at birth are super wrong but i do think he's really quite unconcerned with issues of systemic justice. please do not give your modern au huaisangs good politics it's just not right

imo huaisang is primarily motivated by devotion and affection/loyalty to very specific people, not causes or broader groups, let alone society as a whole, and once that devotion has been undermined it's gone forever. it's an interesting mix of selfishness/selflessness in the sense that his methods involve engaging in a lot of like… self-inflicted unpleasantness, like no one is making you do all that, girl…. but his criteria for what he cares about enough to engage in those methods is basically "does this affect me and mine [which is a very limited circle], y/n" and if it doesn't then he's going to continue prioritizing the pursuit of his interests/comforts/etc. if no outside threats--and not just looming intangible threats like nmj's inevitable decline but threats posed by human actors--threaten that circle then i don't see his priorities shifting so dramatically

--which isn't to say i think he would necessarily be a static character in this AU thought experiment but i see the "OTT public buffoonery by day, 4D chess by night*" turn as a response to a very specific situation not, like, his predetermined character path, and the assumptions about his internal life that lead to the latter reading are usually not ones i find as interesting

(*speaking of which, i think a lot of where this disconnect comes from is that i don't think 4D chess is actually what's going on, really. nie huaisang does not have a bbc sherlock mind palace, in my opinion. i saw a Poste a while back describe him as playing xanatos speed chess (in tvtropes parlance) and that aligns much more closely with my own feeling… like what are his actual skills, that we observe in the story? being observant, being patient, capitalizing on the fact that people let their guard down around him, being able to make accurate character judgments (most of the time) when presented with necessary information (especially wrt understanding the impulses and motivations of other people) and then gambling situationally based on assumptions about how people are likely to react, being a good liar, etc… basically a lot of stuff that doesn't involve engineering complex plans so much as it does biding time, collecting data points, and then being a chaos agent in a controlled manner with the understanding that the principal actors are probably going to react in certain ways that can be funneled towards certain ends. kind of a "steps 1-15: [a bunch of insane shit], steps 16-99: TBD, step 100: profit??" type beat

and i guess where i see this overlapping with what i was talking about before is that i don't think this strategy actually works if you care overly much about who is going to get hurt in the backlash. note, though, that that's a result of specific loss and interpersonal betrayal, not an inherent personality trait, at least not at the same level of intensity...)

[hardynwa]

There’ll be no 388 fictitious polling units in 2023, Imo PDP tells Uzodimma

Leadership of the Imo State Peoples Democratic Party (PDP) has mocked Governor Hope Uzodimma that there would be no 388 fictitious polling units in the forthcoming governorship polls. Reacting to a statement credited to Governor Uzodimma during a church service that it was God that installed him, the opposition party reminded the governor that he emerged through the most scandalous judicial judgment ever witnessed in the annals of the nation’s political history. The PDP also pointed out that following the judicial travesty that Justice Nweze of the Supreme had cried out that the decision of the Supreme Court to create and impose a governor on Imo State would continue to haunt Nigeria’s electoral jurisprudence forever, noting that till date, Imo has continued to be mentioned whenever judicial travesty in Nigeria is discussed. The statement by the state Publicity Secretary ,Mr. Collins Opurozor read: “Even though we know Senator Uzodimma to be sorely deficient in morality, sincerity and integrity, we had at least expected him to pretend to respect God by not spewing barefaced lies and blasphemy against the Almighty God right on His Holy altar. But he has once again proven that leopard cannot change its spots. “To be sure, Senator Uzodimma was declared winner of an election he barely participated in and deservedly came a distant fourth position. “He rode to power through the most satanic conspiracy enforced by the worst judicial fraud in the history of Nigeria. And wherever the forces of darkness reign, there is always blood, there is fire, there is weeping and there is misery. That is the case today in Imo State. It is the character of Satan to give with one hand and take with the other hand.” “Our party recalls that in the aftermath of Uzodimma’s infamous judicial victory, Justice Nweze of the Supreme had cried out, that the decision of the Supreme Court to create and impose a governor on Imo State would continue to haunt Nigeria’s electoral jurisprudence forever. Till date, Imo has continued to be remembered whenever judicial travesty in Nigeria is discussed. “Justice Nweze also noted that Uzodimma, during the election tribunal, admitted that he hijacked the result sheets from the electoral umpire officials and completed the result sheets by himself. He concocted results from 388 nonexistent polling units without indicating the votes polled by other political parties nor the number of accredited votes. Nweze regretted that without evidence of meeting other constitutional provisions, the court misled itself into declaring Uzodinma as winner. “As a Party, we are duty-bound to remind Uzodimma that the God he mocked with his statement is not an author of fraud, criminality and injustice. The fraud that brought him to power turned Imo into a killing terrace, a field of agony, and a land of lack, deprivation and hopelessness. He cannot claim to have been installed by God when under his watch Imo has become a city of bloodshed and has plummeted in all indices of good life and good governance. This is not God’s desire for His people in Imo State. God is peace. He is also love and life. He is the ultimate giver of joy. But Imo today occupies the top positions in all the indices of social strife and misery in Nigeria. “Imolites are aware that their covenant with God to reestablish a PDP-led administration in the State under Senator Samuel Anyanwu, which will wipe away tears, heal all wounds, offer succour to the masses, behead the monster of insecurity, make the land yield again, bring back those who have fled because of killings and make Imo safe again shall come to fruition on November 11, 2023. God never fails.” Read the full article

[morievna]

Ch. 104.5 - On Fukuzawa’s mistake and Fukuchi’s motive and Last Judgement symbolism

*dies irae in background xD*

Woah what a chapter – I still not recovered from emotional meltdown from Given – and we got such exciting continuation in BSD. Honestly i hoped for more of Fukuchi’s POV on Tokoyami island, but Asagiri is such tease and I have to wait more XD

But before I start, I want to make things clear:

I will be a bit critical of Fukuzawa – I don’t want to be taken as I am dragging him or think that he is bad person. He is good person but flawed like everybody.

I know that Fukuchi is mostly hated by fandom…please remember that point of villain is not to be likeable, but that he is serving specific purpose in narrative – to challenge protagonist’s morale, methods and views on system they live in.

Ofc I don’t claim to be 100% correct - this is just my interpretation and super-deduction xD

Okay, so let’s start~~

I want to bring attention to that frame - it is significant because Atsushi was reminiscing about it when he was contemplating Fukuchi’s goal.

What is interesting is that in official polish translation this line is a bit different – something along this:

“Who is right or wrong – let it be decided by God’s Judgement!”

Ofc I am not stating that fan translation is wrong – I just want to point out how from symbolic perspective God’s Judgement = Final Judgement = Apocalypse fits story rather nicely:

Fukuchi is obviously associated with being god or god’s executioner– godlike status of ability + holy sword, nickname Kamui = god, also lion (his ability name) is symbol of god/christ, god=justice as he is seen as justice by others

DoA members count – 1+4 = god + four horsemen of apocalypse

Point of Last Judgment is to pass judgment on living and dead (here vampires) and basically create new world without evil, wars and sins (here abilities) – aka promised land - which is basically Fyodor’s goal

Fyodor specifically created plan with karma in mind – and practically The Last Judgment is about it too – “it will reveal even to its furthest consequences the good each person has done or failed to do during his earthly life” as wiki says.

I know DoA is more leaning towards Buddhism with angels, karma and rebirth - but this is angle is interesting too and judgment in afterlife is rather universal concept. Okay, maybe I am overthinking it too much, but it is fun to interpret that way.

So basically this arc is about Fukuchi judging humanity and serving them karma.

In previous chapters Atsushi failed judgment because lack of courage and trust in Akutagawa – which as result Fukuchi intended to kill him back then. On the other side, he recognized spirit and skill of Akutagawa and Tachihara – thus granting them rebirth as vampires. Imo once they regain consciousness in the future, it will work in their favour. They will be fine, don’t worry~~

And now Fukuchi was testing Fukuzawa with all that ‘guessing his motive’ and when Fukuzawa failed, Fukuchi passed divine judgment on him.

Okay, now moving on to Fukuzawa and why he was wrong~~

Basically xD

Fukuzawa is shown as person who rather makes decisions not considering bigger picture – like going for quick easy remedy to every situation.

Just like in Cannibalism Fukuzawa’s decision to trying kill Mori was depicted as wrong one (as it could result in PM returning to its previous mindless violence version). But there was Natsume Souseki to save situation.

Also his decision to kill advocates for war was temporary solution to stop war (and not thinking about root cause aka imperialistic agenda of government). It is also very ironic lil hypocritical that he went from ‘I won’t go to war because there is only killing’ to ‘let’s kill people responsible for war’ – as sole ‘killing’ wasn’t problem to him after all. And again karma got him – for continuing cycle of violence – as ADA was framed as terrorists to the public by corrupt politician which father he killed.

And then his guessing Fukuchi’s motive –

Firstly, Fukuzawa is portraying as it is only result of single traumatic experience, and not endless exploitation by government to the point of breaking Fukuchi as person. They had thrown him from battlefield to another without break. Ordered to torture civilians. And also government establishing Hunted Dogs, which basically has no true agency as without monthly check-ups they die -  so they can’t really oppose orders. Overall, in all BSD we are repeatedly shown that government is corrupt and is not to be trusted/relied upon – as they only see to use people for their own agenda and not common good.

‘everything for past 36 years has been weighting down’ as Teruko and Atsushi said this chapter.

Because ultimately Fukuchi is after systematic change. He is fallen idealist, who no longer believes that it can done without coercion, thus using One Order and Book to achieve that – creating world without wars and evil. Like a way to prevent more tragedies like these which had befallen him and his comrades.

Ofc it can be that he is seeing that as form of revenge - as stripping power from angels/politicians to make them rebirth to suffer the consequences from their action.

Which could be, because there is interesting change in Fukuchi expression:

Like from ‘shit he got me’ to ‘meh, not at all’ xD

‘Meh’ is when Fukuzawa claimed that Fukuchi is targeting ADA as punishing him for rejecting his plea to help him save comrades. Though it obviously hurt Fukuchi back then – still it is wrong assumption because karma is for everybody~~ Most of ADA have either dark past where they killed people (Dazai, Kyouka, Atsushi) or feel guilty for their inability to save people (Kunikida, Yosano) or have questionable moral code (Tanizaki, Kenji, Ranpo). Ofc I am not stating that they are bad people – they are not – it is just DoA plan to make people get karma for their actions.

To sum it all up, fighting Fukuchi is mistake  - story is repeatedly showing with AtsuAku, Tachihara(+Mori strategy) and now Fukuzawa(+Ranpo strategy). It is simply not about defeating him. Because he has right points about government corruption and need for change – though achieving it through tyranny is obviously wrong way to go xD

Ofc in bad scenario it could go in marvel movies way - with protecting status quo and Fukuchi simply dying, but we will see. I would preferred to see it more The Last Jedi way – like Rey and Luke arc – with Atsushi (with vampire Aku at his side and hopefully Kyouka too) igniting hope in Fukuchi that new generation can fix undoings of the past and the positive change can be achieved organically by kind people.

So last question – did that attack killed Fukuzawa?

Though I am not sure of that, but still I think he is going to die this arc – sorry - for below reasons:

Karma for misunderstanding Fukuchi 

Chapter 91 had very ‘one last time’ vibe with ADA members meeting

Don’t forget that Asagiri is big on trope ‘mentor dies as way to make his protégé grow up’ 

Especially, when you look how much Ranpo is coded as a kid – sweets, don’t wanting to take responsibility and his father-son relationship with Fukuzawa (which is very much emphasized in this arc) –  something just needs to happen to propel his character development, since he didn’t really get any since Mushitarou arc.

Besides, Fukuzawa’s ability stalls other ADA members development too – as he controls their abilities for them. After all, symbolically abilities stand for manifestation of dark part of soul – it is something everybody needs to deal and make peace by yourself, not have other one conveniently control it for you.

But still, probably we will have to wait to see – imo we will get Mersault next chapter with Fyodor opening Chuuya’s gate to unleash Arahabaki mode with black wings for more Apocalypse vibes xD

So that’s all for today^^ Thanks for reading <3

[randomnameless]

Seeing another point about Lonato’s rebellion and how “Rhea BaD” for killing civilians -

Uh, if you give a gun to a “civilian”, and said “civilian” is pointing that gun on your head, I do not call the person who armed this civilian and who told him to put that gun on my head a nice guy.

I know there might be different cultural values at play - but Lonato marching on Garreg Mach with his army of civilians armed to demand “justice for Christophe” isn’t, imo, leading being reasonable. 

Next what, Rhea doesn’t give him the answer he wants, will he shoot her? If she refuses to give him Catherine, will he shoot Flayn in retaliation?

In his battle, Lonato pretty much tells why he is marching, it is not to politely ask Rhea what happened to Christophe, but to bring jugdment to the Central Church and its followers :

The fog has cleared. There's nothing left to hide you or the filthy Central Church from the judgment of the goddess!

Lonato wants to “destroy” the people of the Central Church - he armed his peasants for this goal, I cannot see how this would not have ended in a bloodbath.

Claude explains it himself, had they not stopped Lonato’s merry band of friends, all villages on the road to Garreg Mach would have been burnt :

If we hadn't done what we did, the rebel army would have followed this road all the way to the monastery.

And they would have crushed all the little villages along the way. We stopped that from happening. You should be proud.

Lonato is asked multiple times, even by his son (the non biological one) to put down his weapons and cease his foolishness. His very own Prince can also ask him to stop his nonsense -

But he refuses to back down, to put down his (and his people’s) weapons and ultimately resolves to strike both down for his cause.

For anyone who is familiar with the series, putting down armed civilians who want your head is a clear throwback at FE10′s Elincia’s arc - Elincia does not want to fight and hurt her own people, but her reticence at doing so cost her her dearest sister, and hurt more villagers than she thought. She ultimately defends her castle against the “rebels”, after having asked them to drop off their weapons and being ignored by the same “rebels”, who see her reticence at bringing them justice a “weakness”.

Back to FE16, this event does not happen because Rhea is evil and wants to “terrorise poor uwu students in obeying the Church else they die”, the students were tasked to stay in the back with the rearguard and deal with the “aftermath”.

To show students - without putting them in the blood bath that is the main battle - that raising their swords against the Church Goddess (thanks Treehouse!) is foolish and will be met with force.

Just like, say, you don’t try to storm the Capitol with guns else you will be gunned.

Tl; Dr : Lonato fodderized his civilians to get Rhea’s head - Rhea had them slapped before razing villages and her monastery -> i.e. Lonato was not a hero, and definitely not a heroic rebel trying to defend himself against an unjust situation.

And, funny how some people completely forgot who included Lonato in their plans to create a distraction in the Monastery to sneak around and steal Sothis’s spinal cord.

Is Rhea BaD for fighting back not wanting to be killed, Lonato BaD for getting his people killed in his own delured quest of vengeance where he targets everything affiliated with the Central Church even villages, or the Mole Men and Flamey BaD for fueling Lonato’s head with nefarious ideas, and ultimately using him to create a decoy?

It must be Rhea BaD, the game says it’s very sad, Lonato was fighting for his “ideals”, and planting the tone for the ultimate Supreme Leader washing program, i.e. you’re free to do whatever you want as long as it is to reach your “ideals” or bring a more “just’n’fair society ~”.

[spurgie-cousin]

@anon asking about politics when dating, I’ve made the mistake of not really bringing it up/brushing off small comments as nothing only to find out 5 dates and almost 2 months in after I’d traveled 2 hours to see him that he wasn’t a feminist and didn’t see the point in feminism then proceeded to dump me (would have saved so much stress and hurt if I knew beforehand)

I actually have a friend who brings up human rights stuff (general ideology, lgbtq+, social justice) straight away! She straight up asks and has a conversation about it and if they have a problem with it then it’s a red flag bc anyone who is passionate about human rights doesn’t have a problem talking about it! Next time I date I’m taking this approach I don’t wanna waste time on people who don’t value equality etc!!

Yea I mean I think if you're dating seriously, like looking for a life partner kinda thing, it's good to get all of the stuff that could be a deal-breaker out of the way sooner rather than later. Nothing worse than getting a few months in and finding out this person you really like is a flat-earther or something.

I will say though (and I probably should've added this to my last answer) I've been on dates where people start off firing morals and values questions at you in rapid succession and I think my best advice in that area is just......be chill about it lol. It's stressful to be on first or second dates in the first place so getting grilled to shit can make things really uncomfortable. Read the room, so to speak. I agree that people who care about human rights issues will probably be ok with discussing it but a rapid-fire morality interview on a first date can feel really harsh and judgmental.

Also a thing a lot of sjw people do sometimes is make every micro-subpoint or detail a deal-breaker. Like I'm as liberal as they come but talking to people who over-scrutinize every detail of every opinion is fucking exhausting. So I guess what I'm saying here is keep the Big Picture in mind and don't get lost in the details, it will help things go way smoother imo.

[wedreamedlove]

Xu Mo vs. Mo Yi [Character Study]

I can never get over the aesthetic of these two pictures placed side by side LOL. But, anyway, the point of this post is to nip any undue comparisons in the bud and claims of copying organize my thoughts and compare these two characters to highlight their similarities, differences, and further explore each character through these contrasts.

Q) If you like Xu Mo, would you like Mo Yi?

Honestly, I think this depends on what you like most about Xu Mo. I already knew beforehand that I gravitate towards characters who think 5 steps ahead, are predominantly logical, and scholars/gentlemen, so it’s not surprising I bias both Xu Mo and Mo Yi.

However, as I got to know Mo Yi further (Themis is around 6 months old now), I find that he’s distinctively different from Xu Mo on three crucial points that’ll determine whether people from either camp will like the other character.

1) Stance on Others

In a post for Xu Mo, “Into Your World”, I argued that Xu Mo is an alienated genius who had troubles getting along with others, until he mastered the social game as an adult. However, you can still see glimpses of this as he tries to understand MC’s world and shares his own.

To be fair, Mo Yi’s past is still under wraps but I feel confident in saying that, while he was probably highly intelligent compared to his peers [SR Sculpted Heart], his isolation doesn’t seem to come from his innate nature but rather his social position (there’s heavy implications that he’s like some sort of noble or something) [SR Snowy Pine Fairytale].

IMO, these backgrounds really shaped the way these two men interact with the world.

Xu Mo has a detached and indifferent view towards other people. They simply exist and don’t bring anything positive or negative to him. His ambition to ensure the survival of humanity reflects this too because it’s pure utilitarianism; everyone (apart from MC) can be sacrificed equally for the greater good. If anything, he probably finds other people to be interesting subjects to study, no matter what kind of person they are. IIRC the only time he expressed dislike to people, or a group of people, was when he told Hades he enjoyed killing thieves LOL.

Meanwhile, Mo Yi has an elitist streak to the point where he and his MC actually clashed opinions and debated each other [SR Warm Fingertips]. It’s incredibly ironic because he’s a psychiatrist who treats his patients without judgment, but at the same time he looks down on so many things and people (PUAs, people who betray love, hypocrites who only seek power and fame) [Ch2; Personal Story Ch1-3; SSR Moonlit Ball].

One of the things I noticed early on is that Xu Mo draws from the Eastern scholar archetype, “Xu Mo Character Study”, while Mo Yi actually draws more from the Western gentleman archetype.

So, just to summarize this section, Xu Mo is detached from the world naturally and likes to observe people and try to blend in. Mo Yi deliberately draws a line between him and others and, at times, has the casual cruelty of someone born as nobility (arrogance is carved into his bones, even if he tends to keep it low-key because he generally has a “gentle and polite” attitude).

2) Stance on Love

Xu Mo didn’t understand love, or really even emotions. Love is grown between him and his MC (there’s multiple analogies throughout the game about how their love is like a seed). I think [Ch25] pretty much sums it up for Xu Mo, where he goes through that emotional rollercoaster and muses about how, at the end of human evolution, emotions should be discarded. He also admits that MC taught him the “fear” of a normal person, because now he has someone he cannot give up no matter what, which goes against his previous utilitarian beliefs.

Compared to this, Mo Yi fell in love at first sight. Yes, you read that right. The “scientist and logical” archetype fell in love at first sight LOL. Not only does he acknowledge it right off the bat, but he fully embraces it too and believes that real love makes people better versions of themselves [Personal Story]. Mo Yi is a through and through psychiatrist in that he never underestimates how primal emotions (and love) can be.

Heck, not only is this central to his personal story, but we also have hints that one of Mo Yi’s parents fell in love at first sight with the other person (and he inherited their predisposition for that). Unfortunately, their love had a tragic end and Mo Yi seems to have a huge grudge against his father for whatever happened to his mother (again, Mihoyo is keeping this a mystery LOL), but Mo Yi explicitly confirms that even if his love leads to a tragic end he will still walk down this road and attempt to change it [SR Cool Summer].

IMO one other difference between them re: love is this exchange that lives rent free in my head which I saw in a Xu Mo/Reader/Mo Yi fanfiction LOL. Bear with me here.

Mo Yi: Wearing a mask for a long time will tire you.

Xu Mo: It’s enough just to wear one in front of the necessary person.

Xu Mo and his MC make great efforts to understand each other’s worlds, but this understanding comes from the doors he chooses to open to her. He reveals himself as much as possible, but I think he’s an inherently private person (and there’s all that Ares stuff) so there are times where he hides things so that he doesn’t worry his MC. I think this is enough to count as a “mask”. Sometimes he pretends he’s okay when he’s not.

On the other hand, while I think Mo Yi shares the sentiment in not wanting his MC to worry unduly, he tries to reveal himself as much as possible. There’s an amazingly relatable conflict in him here where he wants her to know every side of him, but he’s also terrified of how she’ll react if he shows her his ugliest sides and imperfect sides (he has some sort of phobia or fear about imperfection, but Mihoyo has been keeping mum on the exact details of this so far) [Personal Story; SR Sculpted Heart].

It’s pretty ironic that Mo Yi wants to be perfect, but he realizes that the more perfect he is the more of a sense of distance there’ll be between him and his MC because of the subconscious pressure someone “perfect” brings LOL [SSR Border of Light and Darkness].

3) Stance on Growth

If you haven’t realized that one of Xu Mo’s greatest themes is the phrase “Take your time in growing”, then what have you been reading? Jkjk, but seriously this gets repeated in multiple places, although my brain always goes back to [Blossom Date] for this.

Even if he and his MC start off with fundamental differences (she believes all people have inherent worth and can’t be involuntarily sacrificed), he wants to personally watch the journey of her maturation. He also subtly guides and teaches her. Unfortunately, due to circumstances of the main story, he doesn’t get his wish and she grows up a lot out of his eyes, but their relationship still revolves around him wanting her to have as much time as possible to grow.

He’s, for a lack of better word, extremely gentle about this (setting aside as much of the Ares and story parts as we can, because LovePro’s story is tragedy on tragedy LOL). I think [Autumn Blaze Date] shows a good analogy for this, because he holds the bicycle steady for MC until she can get going on her own, and he also catches her the first time.

Meanwhile, Mo Yi... ha ha ha. I just came out of chapter 3 for his [Personal Story] and let’s just say his philosophy is tough love. It’s ironic because, in many of his other dates, he wrestles with an internal conflict to protect his MC but also to let her experience all sorts of things to both test and temper her.

This is going to touch on the previous topic about love for a moment, but a part of Mo Yi’s love at first sight experience is also “testing” the other person through all sorts of situations and, after seeing all their different sides, he can determine whether his love at first sight is one that’ll last for the rest of his life or if it’s just a fleeting moment of beauty and emotion.

He also extremely respects his MC’s sense of justice and pursuit of the truth in the world, no matter what she encounters, and I wouldn’t be surprised if this is what drew him to her in the first place. But MC’s occupation and beliefs will make her confront a lot of dark and dangerous things and so, whenever possible, Mo Yi lets her confront these in “controlled” situations to train her. If I had to make an analogy, IMO, he’d let his MC ride the bicycle and pick her up only after she falls, or when she’s like 0.1cm away from the ground LOL.

Mo Yi is (perhaps rightfully) called out on this by another character, who believes Mo Yi is too arrogant in believing everything is under his control and he can prevent MC from getting hurt whenever he lets her get into dangerous situations, and I’m interested to see if Mihoyo will let him experience failures with his philosophy so he can grow more, like the things Xu Mo went through re: his personal beliefs [Ch24].

Overall

I don’t know how well I explained myself, especially for people who don’t know anything about Mo Yi, and each section goes back and forth between the two characters LOL so here’s another section that attempts to describe their overall atmosphere.

If, like I said in my Headcanon Notes, Xu Mo makes me immediately think of all the words for soft, gentle, light, still, water, etc etc., then the words I constantly think about for Mo Yi is messily human. He’s like a bundle of contradictions, but coherent because it’s being intentionally done.

Mo Yi doesn’t discriminate against his patients, yet he can be elitist and looks down on others. He wants to let MC have dangerous experiences, but also wants to protect her. He wants to be perfect, but he also wants to reveal himself entirely to his MC because that’s real love.

In contrast, Xu Mo has a very clean and orderly personality LOL. You can draw clear cause and effect lines from his personality to his actions.

So, anyway, these are two interesting characters who start off with similar archetypes as scientific logical men of scholar/gentleman dispositions, but yet they’re also on opposite ends for a lot of things such as their approach to emotions and the world.

Oh wait, lastly, because I don’t have a good place to put this—but I think it’s funny—is that both characters are pretty possessive and greedy, but while Xu Mo does things in a sneaky, cunning and fox-like way Mo Yi gets ridiculously open about his jealousy and it’s hilariously cute but also almost childish? I often forget Mo Yi is older than Xu Mo by a year, because Xu Mo honestly feels a bit more mature than him LOL. If we count them actually aging by when their game came out though, then Mo Yi is 28 and Xu Mo is 29 now.

[rahleeyah]

sometimes i wish EO wasn't endgame, and honestly i love them but continue to be so on the fence about it all

the funny part is, i have no long-term resentful bone in my body, i can be mean and vicious and a bit vengefull but i could never be done with the love of my life, even after some of the shit we've gone through, some of the things i have felt and been made to feel, some of the things i have heard, some that hurt so badly but that i needed to hear

so i should understand olivia, i should understand how it is to feel unable to give up, to let go, to be done with someone, i should know that one look or move would be all it takes for my anger to subside, i also know that my rage burns bright and short and that i immediatly feel bad about it after because i don't want that to define me, to be how people and the person i love most remembers and knows me

but i feel vengeful for olivia, i feel like i need to protect her at all costs, and sometimes i am unwilling to believe that the one who hurt her the most is also the one who can make her the happiest, for some reasons that thought makes my heart ache, it makes me not believe in justice and i wish that elliot would just understand what it is she has been feeling her whole life, about people leaving, about her feeling she's not enough or, actually, too much

i can relate to olivia, i know how she feels because i feel it too, being too much and not enough at the same time is a burden to live with and i think, somehow, elliot tries to understand but he doesn't know and he will never know and sometimes, sometimes i just wish he could actually get into her head and her heart to finally, finally understand completely what is feels like

but the worse part is, the ones who actually don't understand are the ones the best equiped to heal you, because they try so much to get it that they do the work, they listen, they try and i know elliot can be that person, the one who completes her, who gets her in another beautiful way, who sees who she is, the real her, olivia

but sometimes i also want her to not be olivia all the time and to be selfish and to just say to hell with it and just take what she wants instead and not give it, give it, give it

so yeah, i wish they would end up together, but i also wish they wouldn't, i guess i will be happy and frustrated either way

Something I think is important to remember, when we talk about how Elliot leaving hurt Olivia, is that Elliot is also a person and Olivia knows this.

I don't think I agree with your thesis; is Elliot's departure the thing that hurt her most? No, I think Lewis did the most damage, emotionally as well as physically, bc he took away her control and her understanding of herself. Elliot's departure hurt but she wasn't in therapy over it. Sheila's betrayal hurt worse, I would argue. Bc Olivia didn't trust her but she wanted a family so goddamn bad she let her in anyway, and very nearly lost her son in the process, and blamed herself for it.

The thing is. What Elliot did, leaving, wasn't about hurting Olivia, and she knows this. He wasn't being cruel to her. He made a decision and one of the consequences of that decision is that she was hurt, but there are also positive outcomes with that decision. His family - the family both he and Liv have always put first - will be taken care of. He won't lose his pension, his reputation. He leaves his job on his own terms. Liv won't be dragged thru the mud alongside him.

Also!!! Remember!!! The part where he killed a teenager!!!! He is grappling with an actual serious trauma. And Liv knows this. Liv knows he wasn't trying to hurt her. He wasn't even being particularly selfish, imo; it's not like he wanted to go. Oh he could have answered the phone; ok well Liv knows where he lives and she's turned up uninvited to talk sense into him before. Why didn't she?

A) bc they're not real but b) I think she understands, on some level, why he had to go, and that she has to let him.

His marriage is not just an inconvenience to him. As far as he is concerned it is never going away; he loves his wife, he loves his kids, he believes in his god and the vows he has made, and he wants to be the man who stays. With that in mind it is kinder of him to leave Olivia than to continue to keep her in his orbit, bound to him and yet not ever his. He can't have her, and letting her go hurts her but it gives her the chance to maybe find happiness elsewhere.

You've pointed out that he does understand, better than pretty much anyone, exactly how Olivia feels, exactly how much she needed him, how she struggles with abandonment and feeling like no one wants her, bc she has told him more about herself, given more of herself to him than she has to anyone else and also he walked beside her for so long. They know each other. She knows his secrets and he knows her. So what makes him a threat? That he is the one who loves her most, and therefore is the one who can hurt her most?

The people we love most by default have the ability to hurt us more than anyone else, not because they choose to (yes, they know which buttons to press and which words cut the deepest but willfully inflicting pain for the sake of it is not love) but because they are so bound up in us. Their choices affect us more deeply than the choices of people we care less about. When you build a life with someone, every move they make has the ability to shake you bc you have the same foundation. It doesn't make them cruel. We have to learn to bend together.

The only way to protect Olivia from this pain is for her to never share her life with anyone else. If she doesn't depend on anyone she won't be hurt. If there's anyone who matters, tho, there is a risk of pain. That's life.

I hear you wanting to protect her and I fully get that but I don't see Elliot as a threat. Yes, his leaving hurt her. Yes, he could hurt her again. Anyone could. Anyone she loved, no matter who he was, could hurt her, bc she loves him and he could leave.

Their journey isn't over yet, either. We don't know how their coming together is gonna look. We don't know what kinda work they're gonna put in, what kinda conversations they're gonna have. So we don't know what this looks like.

And also. Fiction gives us a safe place to explore dynamics we maybe wouldn't want in real life and that's ok. Wanting them to be together in fiction doesn't erase your moral judgment, or your knowledge that you'd want better for yourself in a relationship.

So. Idk what to tell you, really. Your feelings are your own and you may just stay conflicted and that's ok!!! We all bring our own baggage to the table and sometimes we can't help but project our own feelings onto the characters, and sometimes that means we're gonna react differently to stuff than other people do. That's just human. I'm sorry if you feel you're struggling with this, but I hope that eventually you find some peace.

[sweetsassymusic]

The Long Kaz Rant I Told Myself I Wouldn’t Write, But Here We Are

This is probably an unpopular opinion. And I hope it doesn't come across as confrontational or anything because I don't mean it that way. But I've always been super confused by the way Kaz is accepted, basically across the entire fandom, as either morally gray or straight up villainous? He doesn’t really seem like either of those things to me. On a surface level, obviously there are things he’s done that are normally considered evil. He’s stolen, he’s killed, he threatened a child, he gouged out someone’s eye. And that’s all pretty bad, right? But it completely ignores the context given in the books. (More after the cut because this got too long...)

There’s a difference between doing something evil and doing something that’s shocking, “dark,” or difficult to watch.

Before I read the books, I heard fans discuss all the horrible things Kaz does. And the way people talk about him, I was expecting him to be… Feral Kaz – someone who delights in doing horrible things because he’s just so twisted and angry. The author herself even referred to him on her blog as being utterly despicable. Wow! This guy must really go out of his way to hurt innocent people, huh? So when I sat down to actually read it, I was so surprised. Most (if not all?) the killings were done on some level of self-defense. His “murder victims” were actual evil people trying to kill him or someone he loved. And the reason he threatened a child was because the only alternative was killing her – something he would never want to do. You know, because he’s not evil.

I don’t know if I just have very different definitions of these terms than most people? But to me, the idea of Kaz being “utterly despicable” should not even be on the table to begin with (Leigh Bardugo, you good?) and even the idea of him being “morally gray” is questionable.

When I think of a morally good character, I don’t think of someone who never does anything questionable or always perfectly makes the correct choices. I think of someone who is on a mission–either to protect the world, a loved one, or simply pursuing a personal goal–who at least tries to conduct his mission in a way that either does no harm to others, or (when that’s not possible) does as little harm as necessary to get the job done. 

Whereas, when I think of a villainous character, I think of someone who has no regard for others at all. Someone who either relishes in harming the innocent, or pays zero consideration to whether he harms innocents while pursuing his goals (which are usually, in themselves, harmful to innocent people). 

And finally, when I think of a morally gray character, I think of someone directly between these two. Someone who is a little bit evil, a little bit sadistic, but not entirely evil. He’s got a few good points too. Maybe he’s someone who keeps switching sides, unsure if he wants to be a hero or villain. Maybe he has hurt a lot of innocent people unnecessarily, but he joins in with the good guys for personal gain, and people don’t mind him there simply because he doesn’t interfere with the protagonist’s goals. Or maybe he’s the “Bad Cop” to someone else’s Good Cop: someone who uses more violence than is necessary, just for fun, but still helps the good side in some capacity, so everyone chooses to look past it.

Under these definitions, Kaz (to me) seems more like a good character. While pursuing his personal goals, he protects people he loves, and yes, he does do “dark” things. But he doesn’t relish in doing them (despite his reputation in-universe of being a chaotic sadist. His reputation is not accurate; he invented it for his own protection). He does them because he has to. If he can get the job done right without hurting anyone, that’s the route he’ll take. But that option isn’t always available. And he’s not the type to lie down and die just to avoid getting his hands dirty (nor should he, imo). 

Again, maybe I just have a different idea of what constitutes being morally gray. But I always thought it was meant to be a judgment on the choices you make when you actually HAVE a choice? A morally gray character has the choice to be good or evil, and they choose to do both (which one depending on how they feel that day). 

Whereas, if you do something “bad” because circumstances force you to do it–because you or someone you love will die otherwise–that’s pretty much the same as having a gun to your head. You’re not morally gray. You’re doing it under duress. It’s survival, not a reflection of where you stand on moral topics. Like, if you trap a vegan in a room with only a piece of meat, and you leave them there for days, weeks, that person doesn’t suddenly become a “fake vegan” if they eat that meat to avoid literally starving to death. You forced them to do it. When it comes to their moral beliefs, they would still be a vegan if they had the freedom to make that choice. You just put them in a situation where those choices aren’t available to them. Your lack of freedom in a situation shouldn’t define you.

The same can be said for placing a starving, homeless orphan boy alone in the dog-eat-dog world of Ketterdam. The option of being a sweet little law-abiding citizen is not available to him. So is it really fair to define him by something in which he had no choice?

I’ve come across so many GrishaVerse fans who, while sipping on their Starbucks in the comfort of their own home, go “Ugh, Kaz. He’s so DARK, so EVIL!” (Fun fact: while my mom was watching the show, she said Kaz is evil because “he seems to always have a plan.” Oh no! Not PLANS!)  “He must be some kind of monster to be able to do the things he does and still live with himself! I could NEVER do those things!” Well…you’ve never actually had to do those things? Your life has never depended on it? Idk, to me, it’s just a very privileged take. And I’m not trying to make this into a big social issue. It’s not like criticism against a fictional character is anywhere near the same level of importance as the issues marginalized people are facing in real life. I’m just saying, it’s very easy to condemn activity you’ve never been forced to engage in for your own survival.

One of the biggest reasons people have given me for why they think Kaz is evil is that he is “for himself.” Even the author said she thinks Kaz is worse than the Darkling (who, I’ve gotten the impression, she believes to be irredeemable) because the Darkling has communal goals (he wants to bring positive change for other people/the world at large) while Kaz’s goals are just personal (he wants to bring positive change for himself and only himself). And for one? It just isn’t true: many (if not most) of the things Kaz does is either for his Crows or for his late brother; he just disguises it with supposed self-interest for the sake of his reputation. And second? It’s…not actually wrong to have personal goals or to act in self-interest. Bettering your own life is a valid desire. It’s not the same as being selfish. Not everything you do has to be for other people.

(And, tbh, this is something Leigh Bardugo seems to have a problem with in general, not just in this scenario. I could write a whole separate rant about other characters that were demonized in-narrative for engaging in “too much” self-care, and how her unforgivingly black and white morality ruined the Shadow and Bone trilogy for me. Worst of all, she even seemed to imply recently that the only reason real-life antisemitism is wrong is because “the Jews didn’t fight back”? [Like, if they had met her criteria of “fighting back”, would that make antisemitism somewhat justified to her? What? Idek, but she should really clarify.] Basically, she seems to take “non-selfishness” to an extreme. I don’t know her personally, I don’t want to make assumptions, I don’t have anything personal against her, and I’m not trying to get her cancelled or anything, I promise. But please, when you read her books, please don’t accept all her ideas at face value, because there’s some Weird Shit™ in there sometimes.)

Anyway, another reason people say Kaz is bad or morally gray is that he wants revenge. “Revenge is a bad coping mechanism! You should want JUSTICE! Not REVENGE!” And again, this argument is wild to me. I mean, yes, there are situations–especially in real life, modern, western contexts–where revenge is a bad coping mechanism someone has developed, and transforming their anger into a desire for justice is a way for them to overcome that and express their anger in a healthier way. But that’s a very specific scenario. When we’re talking generally, the line between revenge and justice is a lot thinner than people think (and in some scenarios, there is no line at all). 

For example, real life victims and their families often say they can’t wait to see the perpetrator rot in prison, even wishing (sometimes even fantasizing) that the guy gets abused in prison by fellow inmates. For them, justice and revenge are wrapped up together in one big court-issued sentence. And while some people find that disturbing or take issue with it, it’s…generally considered valid outrage? This guy is evil and hurt them, so it’s okay for these people to want him to suffer. And most importantly, these people called the cops instead of taking matters into their own hands, therefore they’re Good, right? They’re good citizens who obey and rely on the established authority, therefore they are handling their anger in an Acceptable™ way?

But in the world of Ketterdam, if someone has victimized you, or is trying to kill you or someone you love, you can’t just call the fucking cops (and let’s be honest, looking at irl cops, it’s a questionable idea here too sometimes). If we’re analyzing Kaz’s outrage and how he handles it, we have to analyze it in the context of where he lives, not where we live. We have options in our lives that Kaz doesn’t have. So we have to ask, what are the most productive steps he could realistically take in his world?

I see activists and bloggers on websites like this, publicly fantasizing about gouging the eyes out of certain politicians and right-wing figureheads. And they would probably do it for real if they could. On Tumblr and Twitter, this is generally considered righteous anger. The politicians are evil, so it’s okay to hurt them, right? That’s how the logic goes, anyway (I know some will disagree, but it’s a common take here). Well, imagine if, instead of just being a bigot, one of these evil people personally stabbed–possibly killed–your girlfriend. And there were no cops to call, no news stations or social media to turn to, to show people what this guy did. No authority or community on your side. No way to ensure this guy faced consequences for his actions. There’s just you, your dying girlfriend, your helplessness, your anger. What would be the appropriate way to handle this situation, so you were acting out of justice instead of revenge? What does “justice” even mean in a world like that? It’s a world where either you hurt others or you lie down and just let others keep hurting those you love (which, in itself, would be evil). I can’t think of any “appropriate” response Kaz could take. Which, for better or worse, is probably why he just went for the eye. You probably would too in that context. Are you morally gray? I doubt it.

It’s really weird to me how people seem to hold Kaz to this high standard of absolute Moral Purity, but they don’t hold other characters to it. Like, was the dad on Taken being “feral” or “morally gray” when he told his daughter’s kidnapper that “I will find you and I will kill you” and then pursued him with fury? His motivations were personal and not communal. He was coming from a place of revenge, just as much as justice. But most people consider him a hero. He’s not controversial or “dark.” There are plenty of other heroes who do terrible things (sometimes to innocent people! Even when it’s not even necessary!) for the “greater good” or just because it’s convenient. People call them a “badass” and then turn around and say Kaz is just “bad.” Idk, it just seems really arbitrary the way people draw these lines.

If we’re expanding the definition of “morally gray” to include anyone who’s ever done anything questionable, made a mistake, been forced to do something they wouldn’t normally do, done something for personal reasons instead of for the world at large, or wanted revenge for something, then there literally are no heroes in fiction (except maybe a few cardboard cutouts) or in real life.

(Ironically, the most morally gray thing Kaz does, imo, is something most people don’t even have a problem with: the fact he runs a gambling house to “take money from pigeons.” And even that is really mild [no one is forcing the “pigeons” to gamble their money away]. But yeah, that’s one of the few instances I could think of where he actually hurt innocent people unnecessarily. That and the time, as a kid, where he stole candy from that other kid...and even that might be mostly-but-not-entirely excused by the fact he was starving to death. But yeah.)

[tinkdw]

Hey, thank you for your positivity regarding the show. I haven't watched the last few episodes yet, but I've read spoilers and haven't been able to find out why there's so much negativity surrounding the end (I just can't find any solid or convincing arguments from the naysayers?) I've always trusted your judgment on these things, so I came to your blog to find out your opinion, and as always, I find that your reasoning (and the reasoning of the people you reblog) just... makes so much sense. ❤️

Aw thank you! I’m not like 100% positive or positive for the sake of it, I just stick by the logic that has worked out for me in the past and allowed me to accurately speculate like 99% of the stuff we have meta’d, specced based on meta and then seen confirmed over the last few years.

I also got wound up by negativity tbh, it’s been a negative time in the world, there’s always potential for a stupid ending and we don’t KNOW for sure what’s happening, Misha has been cagey and appeared sad at times when discussing the end (which i think is more to do with him personally than the character with his job and relationships with the crew etc coming to an end) so I do get it.

But with Amara confirming in like 2 fricking sentences the realms of meta I wrote about her purpose re Dean’s arc it just reinvigorated me to think about things logically and LOGICALLY it was what, just a few episodes ago that they literally told us on the show that Chuck’s ending was shitty writing and that Cas had to be important. Now important doesn’t mean he doesn’t die horribly and sacrificially sure, but also... idk he already DID that in s12-13. That story is done. Narratively it’s bad writing to do that again. It’s lazy. Now maybe they’re lazy? Idk I just can’t see them doing all this work to confirm the meta readings of Dean, Sam and Cas over the years and give them a happy ending regarding their issues, like Sam’s self forgiveness, catharsis re Lucifer and a love interest and leadership role, how they’re sorting out Dean’s performative side and allowing him now to be who he is not who he thinks he should be, watching Disney movies and nesting at home etc, and giving Cas a redemption arc through Jack because Jack even existing in the first place is solely down to Cas’ choices, well, why do all that to have Cas dead and Dean miserable or also dead at the end?!

Like even if you don’t ship them for whatever reason it’s canon that Dean is suicidal without Cas, that ending just doesn’t work unless he’s also dead. And could they do a reverse swan song? Yeah I guess. But again why, what would be the point. And again, J2M being confused by the ending kinda makes me think even more that they all survive and Cas is human given those are the things THEY think are the wrong choices because they don’t get it lol.

Also yet again this episode confirmed that Cas chose to believe in Jack, that he chose this, so I find it odd to then make him sacrifice himself again and end up dead when he hasn’t even gotten his reward of being happy for even a moment yet. It’s a possibility but not the most likely imo.

So sure Dean and Cas could die and it’s a reverse swan song, but like, imo that’s a 5% chance that they take a bit out of left field for dramas sake v 95% they just continue with the story they’ve told so far and just wrap it up. I may be totally wrong but that’s I’m going into the the final episodes as I always have, with reserved optimism that yeah sure I don’t really expect them to clarify DeanCas as romantic for the reasons I’ve discussed before, but I do expect them to do all the other obvious stuff justice as they have been ticking them off the list slowly but surely and there really aren’t a lot of meta points left tbh, they’ve been pretty diligent. So imo it would be weird to do all that to just throw aside the character they’ve literally said on the show it would be stupid to throw aside 🤷‍♀️

[shiroganeryo]

D.Gray-Man Tag!

I got tagged by my friend Violet to hop into this little game she made, and there are few things I love more than babbling about DGM, so let’s go! The rules are to tag three people to get the game going, so I’ll do it at the start because this will get looong. I’ll tag @14th-melody, @metzzi and @rudimentor0x0. Here’s the blank post. Sorry if you have already done it, I might’ve missed the posts ;;

⭐ What year did you first get into DGM? Hmm, actually, that’s a hard question because I didn’t get into it right away? If memory serves me right about what grade I was in high school when that happened, I was 15 - so, 2008. Pull a chair, I’ll tell you how that went. It was actually a recommendation from a friend of my best friend; we weren’t particularly close, I just knew he and I had a similar taste for anime/manga and I was looking for getting into a new series... but I wanted it to be worthwhile. So I asked my bestie if her friend wouldn’t give me a rec. He recommended me D.Gray-Man, and just like I do before watching any series, I watched the first opening to get an overall “feel” of it and I quite liked it: cool aesthetic, music was dope, characters were nice-looking. But, for some reason, I didn’t watch it and eventually forgot about it.

Then, one day on my way back home from school, I stopped by a nearby newspaper stand since here they also sell manga. They were all very cheap at that time, so I would often look for new volumes of the titles I was collecting (my allowance was enough to buy two or three!). I saw DGM’s first volume there, and went “oh! It’s that one series he had recommended me! I’ll take it and finally give it a shot.”

I fell in love.

I really liked it at first, but the point where DGM completely won my heart was during Lala’s arc. I had never cried with a manga before. 

⭐ Who’s your favorite character? This is probably very unoriginal, but it’s Allen! At the start I was very lukewarm about him, but as time went on, I felt like I could relate more and more to that kind-hearted boy and he became my role model. DGM has been with me through some of the worst of my life, and Allen’s resolve to keep going, keep walking, no matter how hard things were for him was what motivated me many times in past. It still does. Allen also taught me to be kinder and through him I realized being there for others makes me truly happy. Sadly, I also share with him the same trait of being unable to truly see how appreciated I am and all the good I bring others just for being there... But I’m working on that! He became the first character I felt like I could fully relate to, and I was surprised - but still very happy - to realize that, now that I’m an adult with more experience and maturity, I feel like I can understand him even more and better than before. Our connection didn’t wane with time, I feel so much closer to him now. He’s very special to me.

Standing at the second spot - because it’s also fair I would mention her -, is Miranda! I always say that if Allen didn’t exist, Miranda would be my number 1 since she stands so close to him hahaha After him, she’s another character I deeply relate with. My self-esteem isn’t the best out there so I’m quick to think I’m worthless or useless, just like her. Even so, she wouldn’t give up. Every time I felt like giving up because of auto depreciation, I would think “Miranda would try again, she would work harder”.

It’s like the two of them were walking me through the steps so I could move forward and keep doing my best.

⭐ Who’s your least favorite character? I’m going to say Chaozii. But, before we get to the usual “Chaozii slander” we’re used to doing in this fandom, let me elaborate. It has nothing to do with him not siding with Allen. As much as I love Allen, I know we’re able of sympathizing with his ideals because as the readers we have a plethora of information on his motives; if not for that, we would probably take the same stance as Chaozii has taken about him.

What riles me about Chaozii is that, unlike all of the characters, his mindset is either black or white, good or bad. Everyone seems to have a perfect mix of both, showing many facets just like, well, real, imperfect people. Chaozii is the only one who doesn’t have that. Being simple-minded is not a bad trait, but when that clouds your judgement, then it turns into a bad thing.

It all fell apart when he snapped at Allen when he refused to kill Tyki. That particularly bothered me a ton, even if I understand his feelings. Chaozii, who thought it was wrong and cruel to kill humans and was grieving for his lost comrades, was fine with killing a human whom he wasn’t even sure if was being forced to do things or not. Do you see the issue here? Chaozii never feels to me like he’s striving to do the right thing in order to bring justice, but instead, because he wants revenge.

I hope he does get to learn one thing or two in the future. He has potential to be a great character; but he needs a “redemption” first.

⭐ Who’s your favorite general? Tiedoll! Although I like all of them for different reasons. I really love Cross and differently from what some people think, he did care for Allen and I love their rather dysfunctional relationship. He’s a much deeper character than just a womanizer full of fishy shenanigans. He’s also really badass: former scientist, user of magic, (former) wielder of both an Innocence of his own and another person’s (Grave of Maria). I just happen to love Tiedoll a liiiittle more because I can’t take this guy! He’s just so sweet, and his doting nature makes him both funny and lovely. General Sokalo is really cool and all, but I feel like he’s just a cool guy to me. On a side note, General Klaud could step on me and kill me and I’d thank her. I hope we get to learn more about her Innocence sometime.

⭐ Who’s a character you would get along with? I would love to say it’s Allen, but he’s someone really hard to get close to. If I think about the characters I’d like to befriend because of shared traits or interests, I think I could get along well with Miranda, Krory, and Marie. The first two because they’re two softies who just happen to be really awkward, I feel like I would probably befriend them after trying to comfort them too often. And, the latter, because I’m a person who likes calm company whom I can have honest talks with.

⭐ What kind of innocence would you have? I honestly have no idea. If I had to pick one from the ones we already have, I think I would go with the Dark Boots. Being able to fly and maneuver in mid-air would be a dream come true, I feel the happiest when the wind blows against me. If I have to think of something “for me” specifically, I think I would like a long range Innocence. I particularly like firearm-like weapons like guns, so maybe a gun or dual pistols? Yeah, I think I’d really like the dual pistols.

⭐ What’s your favorite ship? Ah, to be in the DGM fandom is to be a multishipper; yet this is the part where I always get nervous at because my favorite is a rarepair. But!!! I’m building up the courage to be more open about (and less self-judgmental of) the things I like. It’s Allen x Miranda. I don’t really know when it started; from what I said before, you already know they’re both my top favorite characters and very special to me, so I naturally loved it when I saw them sharing screentime. When I realized it, I was looking at them and thinking “they would make such a cute couple together”. It just kinda happened.

To keep this short, there’s this blog I really like explaining about this pair’s dynamics. I think they have a great dynamic together and much potential. They could very easily have a wholesome relationship based in lots of patience and mutually covering the other’s weaknesses and helping them become someone better. These are the best kinds of relationships imo. I hope to share some of my headcanons for them (and even writing, hopefully!) sometime in here. I always picture Allen being older, so that gives me some free room for creativity; it doesn’t look like he has time for romantic love right now, and I don’t really feel comfortable with him being a minor for this ship, so both things go hand in hand.

Honorable mentions go to Link x Allen (again, older!Allen), Yulma and LaviLena, as I also get super happy when I see these particular shippings. 

⭐ What’s your least favorite ship? I actually have some, but it goes against my policies to publicly (consciously) say negative things about certain things if I can help it. I know I’m allowed to have opinions, but you never know who can stumble upon it and what I dislike can be something that makes someone really happy, you know? I tend to stay silent about such things when it comes to something as harmless as shippings.

So, I think I can say I’m accepting of everything as long as everyone respects each other! And, of course, if it isn’t distasteful (as in, illegal).

⭐ What branch would you want to be part of? We’ve only seen the European and Asian branches properly before but even if there aren’t many choices, this is still a hard question; I think both have lots of good things going for them. I think I would probably want to settle with the Asian Branch! I love how lively the atmosphere is and I also feel like there are way less science division shenanigans in there... Sorry, Komui. 

⭐ What’s your favorite arc? I have three! The Rewinding City arc came right after Lala’s arc - that had touched me a lot -, bringing in even more feels. It introduced Miranda and at the blink of an eye, made me care so much about her. The first activation of Time Record after she protected Allen, followed by his thanks to her hit so hard; I get really emotional talking about it. It was such a great, yet touching moment. I think everyone can relate to that; being worthy of receiving gratitude for something they did for someone.

Then, there’s Lulu Bell’s Invasion of the Black Order arc, followed by the appearance of the Level 4 Akuma. I can’t express into words how great the flow of the elements are there. The plot is focusing on multiple characters with their own background dramas happening, all at once, yet none of it feels out of place. Everyone gets their moment, everyone contributes to the big picture (saving the staff and defeating the Akumas). It all felt like one big collective effort of several parts uniting forces, no one was more or less important than the other. It was expertisely done.

And the last mention goes to the Searching for A.W’s arcs (Saying Goodbye to A.W also included). These arcs are being extremely painful but, at the same time, also extremely rewarding to go through. For the first time ever, we’re seeing Allen give in to his wants and acknowledge his feelings; he’s not honest with himself very often, and seeing him actually admit that he still wanted to go on - for himself -, that he still wanted to hold onto hope was something that I suddenly realized I had always wanted to see him do. It’s like I had been waiting for so long. Allen is growing up, and I’m loving to see the part Johnny and Kanda are playing in this. I could talk all day about how happy it makes me, to feel this much hope in the midst of such a difficult situation these arcs are covering. It captures very well the essence of D.Gray-Man imo: the bittersweetness of the hardships of life, and the good things it makes us realize we have had all along. The people we have by our side. The will to continue moving forward because we still have something we love and want to fight for.

Whew, I expected this would get long but guess I got too carried away; those were amazing questions to answer to! If you read until now, you have my most sincere gratitude and appreciation. I wish you have a lovely day! 😊

[bigskydreaming]

You're totally right. I literally cannot read "Jason finds out about Tarantula" fics anymore. I find the way they generally filter what's considered in fandom maybe Dick's biggest trauma, through the lens of " isn't Jay just so awesome for caring (even though Dick's always been such a dick to him)", rather that Dick's needs, pretty gross. And why does Jay's revenge on Tarantula usually matter more than Dick's feelings on the matter (like, Dick could have revenge himself if he wanted, you know?)?

This is DEFINITELY a thing and it bugs a ton.

Like, I get the projection element of using Jason killing Dick’s rapist to act out or process the revenge fantasy of wishing someone would do that for you with your rapist, for writers or readers for whom this is part of the catharsis, and so this isn’t like, a moral judgment of him for doing so, the problem is it never in ANY story has ANYTHING TO DO WITH DICK OR WHAT HE WANTS.

Never have I ever seen a single story about Tarantula or Mirage where Jason kills them after ASKING Dick if that’s what he wants, if that will help him, bring him closure or comfort or relief.

Its just Jason going off and doing his thing, and that’s 100% entirely about Jason, and that’s....annoying, in a fic and an issue that’s supposed to be about hurt/comfort for Dick for something that happened to him.

Like, if Jason was actually acting on Dick’s behalf and fulfilling his wishes, that’d be totally different, but there’s not a single thought ever spared about the fact that if Dick blamed himself for Tarantula killing Blockbuster and thought HE failed HER by not putting her on a better path, then how in the hell do you think he’s ACTUALLY going to feel about Jason then killing Tarantula, supposedly on his behalf?

I’ve talked extensively about how I think Dick has a lot more nuanced and complicated perspective on killing than most people assume of him, and I’m not refuting that here.....but even Dick being willing or tempted to kill someone who’s hurt him or taken someone from him like he was with Zucco and later with Two-Face and then with Joker.....like, this is not remotely interchangeable with how Dick might feel about killing being done in his name, and I don’t for a second believe that’s what he’d ever want from any of his siblings, and thus this would IMO only make things WORSE for his mental and emotional state, rather than bring him any sort of catharsis at all.

Like, its not even about the morality of killing itself even....there’s so many other factors such as Jason’s complicated history with Bruce on this very issue, and like, the last thing in the world Dick would want is to be the reason for even further conflict between Bruce and Jason because Jason killed someone on Dick’s behalf.....ESPECIALLY when its not even on Dick’s behalf because at no point, as I said, is Jason shown thinking through the thought process of ‘is this actually what Dick would want and would it make him feel better, or is this wholly about making myself feel better and venting my anger and aggression about my brother being hurt on the one who hurt him, regardless of how he’s going to feel about it if and when he finds out.’

Like, say what you will about Dick killing the Joker in Last Laugh, but there was never any illusions about him going that far and beating the Joker to death because he thought it would bring either Jason or Tim (who he thought at that point the Joker had killed too) back, nor did he ever during or in the aftermath express any kind of idea that he was doing it because its what they would want. Ironically of course, this ended up being exactly what Jason DID want, just not from Dick specifically, but the point is, this never came up as part of Dick’s thought process either during or after. It was always 100% clear that this event, that moment, was about Dick and his hurt and rage over the Joker taking away his loved ones, just like with Zucco it’d been about his hurt and rage over him taking his parents away and not at all because he was of the belief that his parents would actually want him to kill Zucco. 

Even with Two-Face in R:YO, Dick being tempted to kill Two-Face was less about him having been hurt by Two-Face when he almost beat Dick to death....it really was about him holding Two-Face and that whole situation to blame for Bruce firing him and in Dick’s mind no longer needing or wanting him....he wanted to kill Two-Face not because of what had been DONE to him, but what he blamed Two-Face for having lost, what he felt he’d taken from him....even while knowing full well that this would in no way make things better or right with Bruce, and its the last thing Bruce would want Dick to do.

There is a difference between avenging and revenge, and one of the interesting things about Dick’s stance and history on killing has always been that it always ONLY comes up in the latter. Like, there’s never any point in Dick’s history where he views killing as a valid way to avenge a loved one......the times when he struggles with the desire to, its 100% about his wanting revenge on a personal level.

And that’s the honesty and directness I’m missing from so many Tarantula or Mirage fics these days. Its the disconnect, how Jason is framed and even celebrated as though he’s AVENGING his brother and acting on his behalf, justice for Dick being hurt by these people.....

But the reality is, there’s little to no thought or attention paid by Jason or the narrative as to what Dick’s ACTUAL wishes in this matter are, and what he actually wants and needs in order to be helped along in his recovery.

Its really just about Jason getting revenge for someone hurting someone he cares about and thus feeling hurt and pain by proxy......just twisted and made to look like something it’s not, by saying its FOR Dick even though its likely Dick would actually be worse off for knowing what Jason was doing/had done, as Dick’s guilt complex makes it all but inevitable that he’d now additionally blame himself for being the reason Jason felt he had to do that.....when ironically and obnoxiously, the reality is Jason did it in those stories because its what Jason wanted and what Jason felt HE needed to cope with his feelings and emotions about what had been done to his brother. It really ultimately has nothing to do with Dick, he’s just the excuse, but he also just so happens to 100% be someone who would shoulder the burden of guilt and blame and remorse for even just being the excuse for someone going to those extremes.

If a story is about Dick’s trauma and Dick’s recovery, leaving out Dick’s actual expressed wishes or Dick’s feelings about what other people do or want to do as a result of this is a huge, gaping, annoying as hell oversight.

And for the record, I’m trying to keep this general and not speak to specific fics because I’m aware that for many survivors, the act of projecting onto Dick and what he suffered there can and does mean that for some people, Jason’s actions there are viewed as almost actually being on behalf of the readers/writers who project themselves into Dick’s position in that narrative. I get that, and that’s why this issue is always going to be messy.

As with most things, my true gripe is the overwhelming SAMENESS of the takes on Tarantula/Mirage stories, and the fact that no room is hardly ever left for those who ironically are NOT projecting onto Dick so fully that they feel avenged by whatever Jason does here.....but rather who are simply relating to Dick and thus are actually just looking for the catharsis of him being able to seize back control over his own life and what happens to him and because of him, by the narrative prioritizing the other characters focusing on what HE wants and needs for HIS recovery rather than going off to enact revenge of their own.

Sorry not sorry, but I am always gonna be hardcore gung-ho about the fact that I think that stories that are ABOUT a specific character’s rape should always center and prioritize THEM and what THEY want and/or do, rather than just use them and what happened to them as a catalyst to then showcase someone else acting out a revenge fantasy in their name.

The desire to avenge a loved one, the desire for personal revenge against someone who hurt a loved one, and the desire to act as little as possible on your own personal feelings about what happened and instead be there to help enact whatever that hurt loved one says they want or need to help get better....

Each and every one of these desires has validity....the problem is, depending on the characters involved, they absolutely ARE at times mutually exclusive and not compatible, and thus not keeping a firm awareness on the distinction between these and which are the primary motivations for which characters, like.....it often brings these into direct conflict....but without a lot of writers and readers ever perceiving any conflict exists, because they’re completely centered on Jason’s actions and choices rather than Dick’s wants and needs, to the extent that in a lot of fics, the latter never even comes up for a mention.

And that’s the part that just will never work in my eyes. If its about what happened to Dick, it needs to be about what he wants or needs as a result. There can be other elements in play as well, by all means Jason and others can absolutely have their own conflicting views about what happened and wants/needs for revenge that are at odds with what Dick himself wants, and this doesn’t make them bad or wrong, but there’s so much room for intricate and complicated dynamics and insights there....whereas there’s just none of that in narratives that use harm done to Dick as a catalyst for character choices.....just without Dick’s character choices ever then entering the narrative as being considered at all relevant.

[casually-shipped]

Shane Dawson Over Party?

     I have had issues with Shane for a while. As well as Jeffree. I have issues with Shane’s problematic friendships. Personally, I don’t believe Shane, or Jeffree Star are racist. Have they done racist things, yes they have. Doing something racist and being racist are completely different, but still vile. Within the context of Jeffree and Shane, I have forgiven Shane’s past indiscretions do to his ignorance. However...comma...I have not forgiven Jeffree because he continues to make excuses or ignores responsibility for past abuses of ignorant behavior. Some he has acknowledged, others...not so much. I do understand the kind of person Jeffree is, and what motivates him, but regardless of that understanding, he needs to do the right thing when it comes to past indiscretions when it comes to race, and using predatory accusations to further himself and ruin others regardless of the context of the character of the other person. My forgiveness for Shane however, has lessened do to his enabling of Jeffree and and other “friends.” 

     Shane is selfish when it comes to his “friendships.” Shane is clever and manipulative, and do to his mental health, and selfishness, constantly wants drama to go away, so he doesn’t have to deal with it, other than taking responsibility. He makes excuses for his “friends,” and enables/excuses their behavior, therefor, emboldening, and being complicit and being an enabler! Shane imo see’s himself as a savior, and see’s himself/projects himself in his “friends/people he tries to help.” Because they all have something in common, mental health, trauma, lack of a father figure, and abuse. Do to this, regardless of Shane’s good intentions, he has enabled bad people with bad behavior, furthering their platform, and enabling their behavior when they should be getting help. He makes excuses for them, gaslights his audience, instead of them taking responsibility for their actions.  

     He is not a qualified counselor, or therapist. He however, is trying to be. There was a moment when Faze Banks was talking to Shane about some drama with Tanacon, and what struck me was when Shane said, “I just wanted it to go away.” Speaking of when fans were talking about passing out, and experiencing sunburn, and the trauma that came from that. They needed justice, and Shane just wanted it to go away.  When you have Faze Banks of all people correcting you that it can’t just “go away,” and needs to be dealt with, that says a lot about you, and that said a lot about Shane, to me. He was more concerned with the drama going away, then taking responsibility. Shane does suffer from white privilege, and ignorance. Regardless of lack of malicious intent, his behavior is still unacceptable. I have waited for Shane to do the right thing, and not pass too many judgments, but he keeps choosing wrong. 

     People defending James Charles makes zero sense to me, do to the fact that James, is vapid, shallow, and horrible himself. He’s just as bad as Jeffree, just a lot more clever! Has James changed? I...are you fucking kidding me? Nah! He has however cleaned up his public image...for now. Shane passing judgement on James despite the same can be said about Jeffree is laughable. People coming after Shane on behalf of James is an oxymoron. My grasp of the situation is, Tati revealed her truth about James, which was her right, but she shouldn’t have done it the way she did. I do believe Shane is highly influenced and manipulated by Jeffree. That doesn’t take away from Shane’s complicitness. Jeffree was an opportunist, and used James’ alleged victims for his own personal gain.  Against a teenager. And Shane has the gall to say, “James needed to be humbled.” Then Shane gaslights and manipulates everyone into believing that this behavior from the  “guru’s” is acceptable/expected because, “Welcome to the circus?” 

     Shane’s lack of sensitivity, and awareness of the situation is troubling. I really believe he believes this, but I know a part of him doesn’t, and is trying to protect Jeffree. He knows Jeffree is fucked up, Shane just doesn’t care. Because he thinks he can Fix and save Jeffree. The way people are obsessed with this situation, is beyond me. People are far too invested. All these people are self employed. The worse part is people are also using virtue signaling, and racism, to cancel for their own agenda, and it has nothing to do with justice. That’s obvious. Outrage culture has run a muck, and the excuse is people are tired of racists getting away with it, but this ain’t that fight. It’s a waste of time, when there are literally bigger MORE important fights. You don’t like Jeffree, don’t watch him. You don’t like Shane, don’t watch him. You don’t like James, don’t watch him. You don’t like Tati, don’t watch her. That’s the situation. Should JeffreexShane be held accountable, yes! Is what I’m seeing from the masses that, absolutely fucking not. Save your energy for the real protests, not this mob of insanity, that will not do a fucking thing to advance people of color/ minorities at all. Outrage and cancel culture can fuck right off. It just makes it harder for the real fights, and the reason why those people get away with it. 

EDIT: Update. I’ve seen a lot more racist stuff Jeffree and Shane have done, and am floored. This has gone beyond not watching them, to definitely holding them accountable. I’m still seeing over reaching from a few, but they definitely need to be deplatformed at this point. They have shown no real remorse, nor offered any real true tangible understanding of what they’ve done, especially Shane. After so long he’s only NOW kind of talking about it, and saying sorry. It’s insane!  

[akechicrimes]

i feel like i haven’t seen it pointed out before that probably one of the ways that akechi justified killing people for shido was that all the people shido told him to kill were absolute shitlords in the first place. 

i should put a disclaimer on this post to say that i dont agree with this line of thought, but akechi’s line of thinking probably went along the lines of--well, the justice arcana: a belief that people should accept the consequences of their actions. if people do good actions, the justice arcana believes that people should be justly rewarded for those actions. if people do evil actions, those people should be punished appropriately. (and according to the justice arcana, there’s very little in between here.)

akechi has already lived a life where he’s seen good people--namely his mother--never receive rewards for their good actions; rather, he’s seen the exact opposite, in which good people are forgotten, neglected, or even actively punished for their good deeds. he’s seen terrible people like his father be publicly and consistently rewarded for his wrongdoing. you can imagine that his wish is to administer justice, and let good people be rewarded, and let bad people suffer. (again, one of the greatest ironies imo is that goro antis and goro akechi himself have a very similar sense of black and white morality).

so at the risk of spelling out what we already know, akechi’s seeing that the world is a complete inversion of his sense of morality, which is that the consequence should match the moral quality of a person’s actions. the rest of his quest is basically a long and drawn out journey to find a way to make the consequences match the moral quality of a person’s actions.

this is up to and including being the consequences. if someone does something terrible, they deserve to be punished, and if nobody is going to punish these offenders, then akechi will just have to do it himself. 

the thing about shido’s conspiracy is that it’s all made up of shitty, corrupt, terrible douchebags anyway. if akechi was going to make a machiavellian hit list of everyone in the world who needed to see Judgment Day, basically everyone in shido’s conspiracy would be on that list anyway. from akechi’s point of view, shido’s not telling him to kill anyone who doesn’t already belong in jail or on death row. 

does akechi like killing people? probably not. his scene in leblanc post okumura’s death tells us he does feel a type of way about it. but i think it’s easier to understand why he went along with shido’s conspiracy for so long if we consider that akechi was able to rationalize this as still not an evil thing to do, since all of shido’s marks were shitty people anyway.

and i also think it’s easier for us to understand why he went along with the conspiracy for so long when he doesn’t seem to even like killing: he holds his own sense of morality and his own sense of justice above his own wellbeing and his own feelings. when it came to fixing the world according to what he knew to be right and wrong, akechi wasn’t going to let even his own misgivings stand in his way.

[ducavalentinos]

I’m working on the borgia asks my lovely anon(s) send me about Cesare and I’m writing here and reading some quotes and I just had random thought:

Cesare’s biographers, Borgia biographers in general, usually claim that Cesare’s good administration of the Romagna, his consideration for the inhabitants of the cities he conquered had nothing to do with any genuine personal concern of his. It was just egotist and pragmatic measures to ensure the favour of the people to his side, and so making it easier to establish and maintain his power in these places. And here’s the thing: They’re not entirely wrong, it would be hard to deny he acted on his self-interest,—not that it really matters tbh since in politics, at least as far as I’m concerned, concrete actions weighs more than intentions when making a judgment of a government. Intentions are nothing but an sketch, what truly impacts people lives in the end, are actions. And on that front, it’s equally hard to deny (although some scholars do try) that Cesare’s actions were positive for the Romagna—but then again I don’t think it’s so black and white as they make it seem.

A quote from of Julius Caesar’s biographer, Cesare’s role model and hero, gets closer to the political mind and the complexity of both men: 

“Caesar was a paradox as a politician. On one hand his priority was always Caesar. He wanted to advance himself. But on the other hand, instead of always supporting the side of the wealth and powerful, he would try to extend more benefits to ordinary people.” - Barry Strauss.

Of course Cesare put himself and his family first, of course he was ambitious and he wanted to advance himself, and it is a wise to make your subjects love you instead of hating you, there’s a pragmatic, some would even say opportunistic side to that, or even a sort of a “populist policy” even though the term populist is a confusing one with many definitions, and it is sometimes used pejoratively or as a synonymous for demagogy too, and I have my own disagreements with that on some cases, but in Cesare’s case in particular, it’s clear he is linked to these political concepts because he was a charismatic and strong leader, who was popular among his subjects, and whose policies tended to benefit them more than previous rulers who exploited them with heavy taxes with little return towards their stability or safety of their goods and lives, and oppressed them violently if they dared to complain. In a way, Cesare was following his father's policy along with a more than evident influenced policy from his mancrush mentioned above.

But at the same time, just as Bradford concedes to Lucrezia, that when she had the opportunity to express herself, she would prove to be compassionate and good (and she followed both her brother and father's policies as well at Spoleto and Ferrara so yeah it was a family thing) the same can and should also be applied to Cesare. With the administrative measures he took in the Romagna, a case could be made that although his actions might have been the result of a pragmatic policy, they could also have been the result of his own convictions about governing, and a genuine concern. We can see that wherever he was in position of power, he proved to be good, compassionate and just for those under his rule, while his alleged "cruelty" was as Woodward says: “severity of the sort needed to repress crime and to nip political disorders in the bud.” Otherwise peace and prosperity are impossible and you cannot govern at all. These different notions can coexist, it doesn’t have to be one or the other and I think it’s a more reasonable assessment than to say he was your “typical demagogue” as Deus misleadingly describes him, or that everything he did was only for selfish reasons. Clearly it wasn't, Leslie Garner in his work about Cesare acknowledges that, and he was hardly a sympathizer of him.

We know that he listened patiently to all the complaints made by the inhabitants of Forlì, even though he didn’t really had to do that, he could have listened for a few hours maybe, and then delegated to someone else on his staff. If his concern was only a front to gain popular support as it is assumed, that would have had sufficed imo. His popularity wouldn’t have suffered because just the mere fact someone was listening to them at all was, in itself, a suprise for these citizens. But he made it a point to be there himself through the whole thing, and to also punish his own men in order to give them, his new subjects, justice. That shows his commitment to some degree, it shows he was deathly serious about his bans against any plunder or violence against the citizens, it wasn’t just pretty words to please them and later on forgetten, surprisingly. He did that more than once. It was important to him that things were done right, and that justice was made. Even Sacerdote, who like Leslie Garner, was hardly a sympathizer of Cesare and his family, has to grant him that he was "a lover of justice" and we see it through his own letters as well.

If Cesare appealed to the masses exclusively for his own ambition and benefit, which sometimes leads to a ludicrous comparison to Nero for example lol, since he is known as that type of emperor (most likely unjustly) it would have been more transparent imo, eventually the true colors of a leader make themselves known, esp. considering all eyes were on Cesare, all the time. His efforts to administer his duchy alongside his close proximity, and the time he spent with citizens of Cesena, Imola, Forlì, to the point that he even criticized by the members of the elite and had to tone it down because oh my god! a ruler cannot be this acessible these peasants! what is this?! The scandal! was as much part of a clever policy as it was a characteristic of his person and his own preferements.

It’s almost impossible not to notice that he actually seemed to prefer the company of 1) his Spaniards and 2) his romagnols subjects than that of nobles and their ambassadors, which could help explain in part why he made himself so hard to be accessed by them. And honestly I can’t say I blame him. I too, would rather be in the company of people that wouldn’t just love to stab me to death if they could, or regarded themselves superior to me because of their ancient bloodline, or that I knew that in my presence they were all compliments and smiles, but the moment they walked out the door, they would keep insulting me and my family and writing half truths or lies about me. 

The point is: as with everything concerning Cesare, it’s almost never one thing or the other, just as his actions can not be explained by one reason alone. It's an ensemble of many factors, from his personal feelings to his own personal set of beliefs and vision, to his political thinking, and the ever-changing political scenarios around him. And I think his administration goes into that, a lot. More than anything else in his life I’d say.