#but I've gotten especially into it now that book 6 is out in full on the EN server

[doctor-bus]

I've decided to go twisted wonderland on main

this is formal warning that I'll be rbing spoilers (but only for what's out on the EN server) and to spoiler tag it if you don't wanna see it

[scoops-aboy86]

I've had a terrible day, comment to ease my turmoil?

Oh, and towards the end of this chapter, “Luck can’t fix stupid” is just Eddie being hard on himself. He is a good boy who is trying his best. 

Part 1, part 1.5, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7 of the love spell no go au

By morning, Eddie wakes to find that he’s rolled over in the night and Steve has burrowed into his arms. Hair that smells of Eddie’s shampoo tickles at his nose, and Steve is warm. A tingling under Eddie’s fingertips where they’re draped across Steve’s back tell him that his healing spells are still working—maybe that’s why Steve is sleeping so peacefully that it’s already dawn. 

Nancy was supposed to have woken Steve for his guard shift, probably hours ago. Huh.

Eddie wants to melt into this and soak it up, just in case he never gets another chance, but… there’s too much going on right now to get caught up in whatever this might be. Better to take a page from Steve’s book and let it be, hold his tongue and wait until they’re not dealing with an interdimensional catastrophe. 

Careful not to wake the (beautiful, brave, captivating) boy in his arms, he extracts himself carefully from the bed. He can’t resist leaving a soft kiss on Steve’s temple before he goes, though, his heart clenching and expanding and basically exploding in his chest when Steve shifts with a sigh and presses his full body into the space Eddie just vacated, seeking the lost body heat and breathing deeply against Eddie’s pillow. Fuck. Fuuuuuuck.

Instead of crawling right back into bed like he wants to, Eddie slinks out of the room and down the short hallway to the living room, eyes averted from the fleshy gash in the ceiling. Nancy is standing in the middle of the room, arms crossed as she stares up at it—but her eyes are clear, and she refocuses on Eddie as soon as he clears his throat. 

“So, uh,” he croaks, throat still rough from sleep. “Watch system kinda broke down, didn’t it?”

“I couldn’t sleep,” Nancy replies, too quick not to be at least a little defensive. 

Eddie peers past her to Robin, who is asleep face-down on the couch with his uncle’s scratchy wool blanket draped over her. “Not saying I blame you there, Wheeler, but. Did you try?”

After a pause, Nancy lets out a breath that seems to come from all the way down to her toes, stiff shoulders slumping just a little and world weary in a way that no teenager should have to sound. “No.”

He flashes her a brittle smile, because yeah, he gets it. The only reason he’d managed any shut-eye was probably thanks to Steve’s reassuringly steady breathing at his back. “Fair enough. Instant coffee?”

There’s only the slightest twitch of distaste in her expression (he’s betting the Wheelers can afford actual coffee beans and shit) before she nods. “Coffee would be great.”

Which kind of makes him feel like a waiter, but he did offer. Eddie puts his back firmly to the gate and pokes around the kitchen for a pot to fill with water, pours it into four different mugs once it’s come to a boil, and dutifully stirs in the shitty off-brand Folgers. 

He sips his own somberly, pensive. All his life, it’s been drilled into him that magic is to be kept secret, cast in the shadows and never so flashy that it would draw too much outside attention. That’s what had gotten his dad locked up. 

But this group already knows about magic, even if they only refer to it as such using dnd metaphors that are actually more accurate than they think. Hell, maybe psychic powers are just a different method of spell casting—that’s deeper into magic theory than he usually ventures to go, though, so whatever. Not important right now. The point is… they could all die. It’s a very real possibility, especially for Max, and Eddie’s seen how that goes twice now. If there’s anything he can do to help, he has to try. 

Which means… he has to tell them. 

After Nancy recounts what Vecna showed her, after they formulate a plan that makes Eddie’s stomach clench and roll with dread, Eddie opens his mouth and says, “Guys, I have to tell you something.”

They sit patiently if a little incredulously through his explanation. A little more credulously once he gives a demonstration, turning an apple from the Mayfield’s kitchen blue, then, purple, then neon orange, then back to red and slicing it down the middle into an even seven pieces without so much as touching it. 

Dustin speaks up first, because of course he does—interrogating him about what offensive and defensive spells he knows, leading with examples that Eddie recognizes almost word for word from the Monster Manual. Lucas joins in after a minute, the boys’ enthusiasm snowballing until suddenly they’re drafting a list of things they want to see if Eddie can do. 

It’s Steve who ends up putting a stop to that, snapping. “Hey shitheads, he’s not a show pony and he’s not going to do tricks just to satisfy your scientific whatever, alright? You wouldn’t do that to Eleven, we’re not doing it to Eddie.”

“Scientific method, Steve,” Dustin grumbles, but relents. Eddie shoots a grateful look to Steve over the kid’s shoulder, and the smile he gets in return makes his heart do a flip. 

“I can’t do big shit like Vecna,” he cautions everyone, now that he can get a word in edgewise again. “But I can do smaller stuff. Protection charms on clothes, spells to make sure we don’t miss what we’re aiming for, that kind of thing. I can help, I’m just… not your point guy. I’m no Supergirl.”

Max snorts at the Supergirl part, but speaks up with a grave, “As the person sticking out my neck for this crazy plan, not missing sounds nice.”

That seems to clinch it. And next up, they need to stock up on weapons, so…

It was waking up to a cuddly Steve Harrington that did it, Eddie swears. That, and adrenaline from staring down the barrel of the balls-to-the-wall insane plan the group has concocted, because Eddie is surrounded by fucking heroes aparently. He doesn’t feel very heroic. 

Because he says things like “It’s not exactly a car, Steve” with a devilish smirk, and not asking but telling Steve that he’s driving the stolen RV, the words big boy tumbling out like his mouth has a fucking mind of its own. And each of those times, Steve blinks back at him with something in those hazel eyes, which Eddie is trying so hard to tell himself he doesn’t know how to read, but he wants. 

There isn’t time to do anything about it, though. When the RV’s rightful owners start banging on the door, adrenaline sends Steve leapfrogging into the driver’s seat and Eddie scrambling to get away from the windows so he won’t be spotted. They roar out of the trailer park with the kids whooping in the back, caught up in the adventure of it. 

Eddie feels like everything is going wrong and about to get worse, but he’s felt that way ever since Chrissy died so that’s nothing new. At least Steve stays in the RV instead of going into the War Zone, even if it takes Robin pointing out that the entire high school had seen them talking at Eddie’s locker on Friday and some probably noticed them sitting together at the game—because yeah, Lucas had told them what Jason Carver had done to Gareth, and Eddie doesn’t want anyone else hurt because some vigilante jock thinks they might be harboring him. 

“Sorry,” Eddie tells him after the others are gone. When Steve gives him a blank look, he adds, “That you’re a known associate of The Freak.” He nods towards the back of the RV where the two boys are wrapped up in a conversation of their own. “It’s bad enough that Lucas and Dustin are in the crosshairs, but they at least signed up for Hellfire.”

Steve frowns. “You’re my friend, Eddie, I don’t care who knows that. It shouldn’t even matter.”

“Dude, all of this shouldn’t be happening, but it is. It does matter. A hell of a fucking lot.” Eddie braces his elbows on his knees and drops his head into his hands. “Fuck.”

After a moment, a hand presses tentatively between his shoulder blades, shifting reassuringly up and down. It’s a big hand. Eddie is almost disappointed that he’s too upset to fully appreciate the contact. 

As it is, he groans into his hands and shrugs the touch off. “Steve, I should… I have to tell you something.” And you might not want to keep touching me after you hear it, he doesn’t say out loud. 

“What is it?”

Eddie lifts his head with a flick of his hair and a quick flail of his hands. “That was—I just cast a little privacy spell, if you were wondering. So the kids can’t eavesdrop.”

“Okay,” Steve says slowly. “Do you do that a lot? Just do magic like that? Because, you move your hands around a lot…”

He can’t help but smirk a little at that. “Not as much as you’d think. It’s a good cover if I have to, though.”

Steve’s eyes are wide and curious, his irises a honeyed brown tinged with spots of green. “Have you ever used magic on me?”

Aaand there it is. Eddie looks down at his hands, now clasped across bare his knees where time and wear have reduced the denim to strings. “Yep.” 

“Like what?”

So Eddie tells him about the love spell. 

Magic, considering everything else Steve has seen over the past few years and especially the past few days, isn’t much of a stretch to accept. That trick with the apple had helped, but for the most part he’s learned to just push through the confusion and listen to whoever sounds the most certain about it. 

And Eddie sounds pretty certain that he’s ruined Steve’s life. 

But that’s… not right. His life doesn’t feel ruined. He has Dustin and Robin. Yeah, he keeps ending up in life or death situations, but that gives him a sense of a purpose and might have happened anyway, because it’s not like Eddie’s one spell back when they were underclassmen created Hawkins Lab or Henry Creel out of thin air. 

A big part of Steve is elated, actually. Eddie likes him. Or liked him, enough to try and secure his heart with magic. Maybe that elation is from the spell, but honestly? The world might end tonight and any of them might die trying to stop it, so he’ll take any good feeling he can get regardless of where it’s coming from. 

When he tells Eddie as much, the guy looks about ready to cry. 

Before he can protest, Steve says, “I know you think you made me feel this way and that it’s like—” he frowns, unable to remember the way Eddie had put it “—violating my self-asomething-or-other, but fuck that. Your uncle said it wouldn’t have worked if I could never have liked you on my own, right? And I… In high school, people just hung around and I could never figure out why. Magic is as good an explanation as any, I guess. But with you, I had to work to get you to be my friend. I had to earn it. The more I got to know you the more I knew you’re a great guy, so by the time we were friends it felt like I’d really accomplished something, you know? You’re really nice, once you get past the prickly attitude—”

“Prickly?” Eddie mutters, quiet like he wants to interrupt but still feels a little too guilty to quite dare. Steve gets it; he knows how guilt can be, especially when it’s guilt for a stupid reason. 

“—And you’re smart, way smarter than me. The teachers who failed you are either full of shit or bad at their jobs, probably both. You’re so creative it blows me away, keeping track of all that Dungeons and Dragons stuff and making up entire worlds and all the people that go in them. And you have a great smile, with dimples and everything, and your hands are… And the way you watch me sometimes, like I’m the only person in the room even if we’re in a crowd, it feels really good.”

Eddie is getting more red by the second, a flush starting in his cheeks and threatening to go all the way to his chest at the compliments. Which, okay, Steve knows he’s gushing, but he’s been bottling all this up for a while and he’s not used to that. When it comes to love he’s usually an all-in kind of guy, and holding back had led to a quiet but snotty breakdown in Robin’s arms the night before. 

… Damn, he’s going to have to admit that she was right about Eddie being into guys (into him), though. 

“Steve,” Eddie says, and he sounds longing. Music to Steve’s ears. 

“I wanted the championship game to be a date,” Steve blurts. Because he’s already mentioned Eddie’s dimples and his hands, might as well go all in. 

Eddie’s blush intensifies, the start of that dimpled grin Steve loves so much on his face. “I… I did too.”

“So… after the game, when you went off with Chrissy…”

“That was just business,” Eddie says quickly, and Steve ducks his head to try and hide the relieved grin. “I mean, I wanted to help her, but I’m, uh. It’s always been just guys for me.”

“It’s both for me,” Steve tells him, glancing up through his eyelashes. He notices the way Eddie’s hand twitches, wanting to reach out but unsure, so he reaches over and tentatively lays his fingers over Eddie’s ringed ones. “Is that… okay?”

Eddie bites his lip, and just as tentatively twines their fingers together. “Y-yeah, I think so. This is—Shit, yeah.” 

“Would it make you feel better if… I don’t know, is there a way to turn the spell off?”

“Not really, magic doesn’t—” Eddie starts, but then stops, frowns. “Uh. My uncle did teach me something to undo magic once, but it’s a whole… thing. Like pulling a ripcord on a parachute, and, yeah, you stop falling as fast, but it jerks you around first. And it would ‘turn off’ every spell I’ve ever cast.” 

Before Steve has a chance to react to that, they’re interrupted by the rest of the group crashing back into the RV. Steve is up and barely even registers the remnants of Eddie’s privacy spell clinging to his face like invisible cobwebs. He spots Jason Carver out of the corner of his eye just before pulling out of the parking lot and, fuck. 

The rest of the day is too busy and tense to speak to Eddie alone, and Steve has a creeping worry (which he tries to ignore) that maybe Robin is right; maybe they aren’t going to be okay this time. 

Eddie doesn’t get to have nice things. Like an unbroken family, or a high school diploma, or Steve Harrington. 

He knows this. It’s deeply embedded in the reason he chickens out at the last minute, shaping his possible last words to Steve into, “Make him pay.” In that moment where their eyes had met he’d felt every loose thread, every unspoken thing between them weighing on him like a ton of bricks, and he regrets everything. Even though there hadn’t been time. He wonders if Steve regrets not saying whatever was on his mind back at the trailer, while the water was running… And from the way Steve looks back at him before nodding and turning to go, Eddie thinks he can hear the hollowness in it. 

Steve has similar hollowness, Eddie knows. Parents whose attention has always seemed to ghost right over him ever since Barbara Holland, leaving Steve to drift all alone in that big house until he felt like a phantom. They know these things about each other; they’ve talked about it all while high (everything except the Eddie wanting Steve part… and, apparently, an entire alternate universe full of monsters). And Steve gets it, even though Eddie wishes he didn’t. Wishes Steve’s life could be easy streets and clear sailing (ha, ahoy) so that Eddie wouldn’t have to feel so seen, stripped bare of all his armor. 

Even his battle vest is still in Steve’s possession, hidden under the thick army jacket. 

And it’s ironic, really, that Steve thinks he’s the stupid one but Eddie forgot about the goddamn air vents in the trailer. There isn’t really a spell to protect against that; luck can’t fix stupid.

So he does the best he can think of, if it can be called thinking at this point: flings a stealth spell at Dustin so the bats will be more likely to forget about him, cuts the sheet-rope, and bolts out the door. He grabs a bike and pedals as hard as he can, just trying to get away, and in the blankness of his panicking-in-overdrive mind an idea begins to form. 

When one of the bats gets caught in the spokes and Eddie goes down, he’s up almost immediately and spitting the words Wayne taught him when he was still small—before his uncle got custody but after his mom started getting sick, when Eddie’s dad had first started getting reckless. 

The swarm of flying monsters descends on him while he’s still screaming the spell. After the last syllable, bleeding and knocked around by the attack, the ripcord pulls and Eddie is slammed into darkness.

Tag list (comment to be added): @hotluncheddie @8em-em-em8 @anaibis @connected-dots @lawrencebshoggoth

Part 9, part 10, part 11

[mermaidsirennikita]

ARC REVIEW: The Trouble with Inventing a Viscount

4/5. Releases 9/24/24.

Vibes: cat and mouse, con artistry, heroine stomping her foot and going "ERRRGH" while the hero smirks

Heat Index: 6/10

Honoria Hartley doesn't want to marry--and that doesn't seem to be an issue, as she's been betrothed since childhood to the long-lost Viscount Vandemere. The last thing she expects is Vandemere showing up on her dootstep; and it's much worse than that. The man claiming to be the viscount is Oscar Flint, a con artist Honoria had a run-in with a year before (she probably shouldn't have told him about the missing viscount). She's determined to avoid marrying him--he's determined to pull off a con with his life on the line. Now, if they can only stop kissing...

One of the best things about Vivienne Lorret is her sense of humor as a writer, and this book is a perfect example of that. From the very beginning, you have this snarky interplay between the truly bratty (in the best way) and headstrong Honoria and the very smarmy yet very charming Oscar. It feels kind of like a screwball comedy, with the two of them--especially Honoria--going to increasingly ridiculous lengths to one-up each other. I'm talking like... disguises. Eyepatches. Honoria comes from a theatrical family, and Lorret takes full advantage of that.

It is a little cluttered at points, if I'm being honest--we have not only Honoria and Oscar falling in love and digging at each other, but an entire family attempting to get rid of Oscar. However, there's such a charming chemistry between the two of them--and so many hilarious moments--I could forgive a little plot lagging here and there. I wouldn't call this enemies to lovers, but it's definitely rivals to lovers, and if you're down with that... this is for you.

Quick Takes:

--I'm so used to romance novels starring plain heroines or heroines who are pretty and just don't realize it... Honoria is super pretty and very much realizes it. Oscar first meets her in total disguise (Honoria loves a disguise) and his dismay at realizing that she is in fact, just as pretty as she claimed to be, is excellent content. If only she wasn't hot!

Genuinely, the characterization of Oscar and Honoria is the best part of the book. They're both kind of disasters, and they act absolutely ridiculous over each other. It's just a lot of fun.

--At the same time, the stakes are fairly high. Lorret balances that tone with her turn of phrase, but she doesn't totally abandon the touches of darkness the plot necessitates. I mean, there is very much an executioner's bland hanging over Oscar's neck for a lot of this book. But he's so wry and clever that you don't always remember that. It's not a bad thing--the opposite, actually.

--It's honestly kind of nice to see a plot that's really zany, even if I think the pacing between the lovers could've been a bit faster. This reminds me a little of older historicals. You definitely feel the big swings coming, and I appreciate that.

--I love the Hartley family. So fun to read a historical in which the parents are into each other and the mom in particular is such a romantic. A romantic who wants her daughter to realize how important it is to get yours!

--I can't get into one thread that I was excited about... which turn out to not be that. It did make me wish that we saw more historical heroines who aren't particularly into the idea of having babies.

The Sex:

There are about 3.5-ish sex scenes, two of which sort of run into each other. They're all well-done and hot, though I think we definitely could've gotten a little more creative. But in my opinion, the hottest scene of the book is actually a RIDICULOUS picnic that has some of the most insane erotic eating content I've ever read. I was laughing, but at the same it was like... YES?

A con artist romcom is always fun, and this is no exception. Pick it up when you're in the mood for a romp, especially if you like the idea of heroines just! Not! Wanting! To admit! They're into someone!

Thanks to NetGalley and Avon for providing me with a copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my won.

[harveybwabbit92]

[Takes place after this, Belial, 80 and Riku are sitting the living room waiting for R/n to explain herself, this had been a long time coming that's for sure. Belial had suspected for while that R/n wasn't human and been patient with his wife hoping she'd open up to him eventually but that didn't seem to be in the cards until now...]

Riku: I just don't understand how Isla could have gotten her powers so early, Akari said her powers didn't fully show up until she was around 6.

Belial: That because Isla is a full blooded giant not a half-breed like the Zero brat's sister.

Riku: What?

*He looks at R/n who stares down at her lap.*

R/n: I don't know how to start this out.

80: Just do your best to explain.

R/n: Well, I guess it's no secret that I'm not what I appear to be- I think you figured it out over time or in Riku's case just this second...

Riku: You're not human?

R/n: No, I'm not....I need to get something.

[R/n gets out of her chair and goes into her office, she returned a few moment later with an old book, She opened it and places it on the table for them to see, It was photo of a picture stone from the viking age depicting a giant being fighting a dragon falling from the sky while tiny people cower from them.]

R/n: We were peaceful race that once lived together with humans, but as these things go our relationship soured and we were soon driven into hiding...

Belial: How the hell can mere humans force a race of giants into hiding?

R/n: Because that same race of giants were stupid enough to give some of those humans advanced weaponry to help combat threats. From a war hammer that controls lightning, to replacing a blind man's eyes with cybernetics so powerful they allowed him to see people half way across the land as though they were right next to him; we were naive... and we paid the price for it.

80: Wait, wait...A lighting hammer, a man with all seeing eyes? that sounds almost like...R/n, are you a jötunn?

R/n: Yes, but I've become quite used to the name frost giant, seems quite fitting considering...uh, ah!

[R/n grabs Riku's glass of juice off the table and stares at it, a few seconds later a layer of frost formed on the outside, R/n then used the reusable straw to pull the now Popsicle She handed it off to a stunned Riku.]

Riku: Is explains the snow thing...

80: And why your office is always so cold.

Belial: Why didn't you tell us? Why didn't you tell me?

R/n: I was scared, okay?

80: Scared of what?

R/n: That...I- I thought if you knew what I was you were going tried to experiment on me or put in a zoo or something.

Riku: That's ridiculous, why would anyone-

R/n: Because I'm the last of my kind! The jötunn are gone I'm all that's left. and as soon as some rich prick alien figures it out; they'll do anything just have to have me. Especially when they figure out my lineage...

Belial: You're linage? What were your parents royals or something?

R/n: Humans have been known to call me Hel, though that was never my name to begin with.

Riku: Your father was Loki?!

R/n: Nods

Belial, still lost: Loki? Whose Loki? Was he important?

Riku: Loki was the god of mischief and was considered king of the frost giants. He had three kids with his mistress, a giant snake who circles the world, a wolf that never stops growing and a girl whose body was half rotting...

Belial: R/n doesn't look like she rotting away to me...

R/n: Yeah, those tales were very exaggerated...

[bluepeachstudios]

Do you have any HC's for the Skittles when they're older? Like personality traits? Level of Chaos? Moral compass?

Oh gosh I have so many headcanons about the Skittles for when they're older. I've got like, 6-year old vibes and 15-year old vibes.

I'll go with the 6-year olds.

Sanzio is a lot different from Raph. He's quiet, tends to behave himself, stays out of trouble as best he can. He really likes cute things! His favorite color is pink. However, just like his dad, he is very protrective of his brothers. He tends to be the big shield while Bardi is the sword. He loves reading and books! He's not very active because his back hurts a lot and he's still dealing with his lungs being squished by the kyphosis, so he spends most of his time doing things that let him sit or lay down. He's generally low-chaos but will occasionally throw in a curveball and suddenly be leading the charge on the cookie jar.

Bardi, despite talking a lot as a baby, gets quiet as his brothers start talking for themselves. He spends basically all of 1 and some of 2 just never saying a single word. Then he just starts talking in full sentences, and now he won't stop talking again. He loves talking. He loves telling people about his plans. He especially likes drawing things like engines and cars. He is. The MOST chaotic besides Simoni. He and Simoni are the disaster twins of the Skittles. He is used to getting dislocations but still goes to an adult to fix them (something he'll stop doing by 9 and he just starts fixing them himself out of annoyance).

Simoni has at this point learned to keep his tongue in his mouth when he chews or talks, but it's far more comfortable out of his mouth so he usually leaves it there. He's behind on development milestones, so he still can't talk properly in full sentences. At this point one eye has gotten slightly larger than the other, which isn't growing properly. He's very shy about this. Simoni's a lot like Mikey, though, he's generally cheerful and a little menace. High chaos. Tends to know when you're feeling down and will do anything to cheer his family up, but he's also not afraid to get upset and show it himself.

Davinci is the quietest. He does a lot of mimicking others. He's just learning how to be properly active, though he has a wristband that tells him if his heartrate is getting out of range or his 02 drops too low. He's frustrated by this. He likes listening to people talk, which makes him and Bardi a good pair, as Bardi always wants to talk. He's still the smallest of his brothers, and will likely stay that way, so he gets protected by them more often than not. He's the unofficial "baby brother", which frustrates him because his dad's leader, so he should be too.

All of them have a fairly strong moral compass. At this age right and wrong are very black and white for them. Bardi's a little more okay with breaking the rules "for the greater good" while Davinci would never.

[aprismaticodyssey]

Hello; please read this, if you don't mind.

This isn't any sort of update. This isn't an announcement. I know I haven't been posting and I haven't been active, so I'm sure to a lot of you, I'm all but gone. For all my talk of "I'm writing this!" and "That's being edited!" I haven't shown you guys anything. I will get to that later. This post is to tell you about my dog and his situation.

That's right! I have a dog! A yorkie. I should have spammed you all with pictures of him. We had gotten him (my mother's idea) to help me through depression. He absolutely loves people, adores meeting new dogs (even if the bigger breeds scare him), and especially kids. He's a people person. He'd sooner lick you to death than ever cause anyone genuine harm. My dog's name is Monty. Monty the Monster. And he's certainly grown into his name when he would play!

Unfortunately, at eleven years old, I guess his time is... running out. You see, last month, we took him to be groomed at a pet store we frequent. When we came home, a couple days later, he would eat less. He wasn't quite as playful, but he was still more or less himself. After stressing about his lack of interest in food, we went to the vet. There, we were told he has a heart murmur, a 3 out of 6 on the scale, I believe. We were recommended to take Monty to a cardiologist and our vet personally recommended one that she had gone to.

The problem is... everything was booked up. Some places we simply couldn't trust with something so delicate. Others were full until next February or March. Last night, my mother had me call one more place and after the call, we were told to come in on emergency. Not ideal but everything was full and we had to get him looked at. His breathing is hard and fast, uncomfortable. Wheezing. A few coughs. Distress in his eyes.

So we left. The place was nice. The people were nice. The problem was what they found: metastatic cancer in the lungs. I appreciated that we were told matter-of-factly. Very straightforward. But I still cried nonetheless. And when we were left alone, I broke down. Our options were this: we give him a few days of medication and see if it helps him. If it improves his quality of living adequately, we could get more medicine. Or... after those few days... we come back and have him euthanized. My mother has looked into other avenues already. Further treatments. Tests.

But I've already made up my mind. It isn't fair for me to put him through all of that just to delay the inevitable. I feel like a horrible owner for thinking that. For saying it. Like I should be moving mountains to give him another week. A month. A year. But I can't. I just can't. I couldn't handle seeing my dog knowing that all I've done is bought him time, time his health has decided he doesn't necessarily have. I struggled going to sleep last night even after crying. I told him over and over that I loved him. That he's my best friend and how much he helped me. These eleven years are too short. Too soon.

So... the reason I'm posting this, the reason I'm saying all of this, is just because I would like you, any of you, to say a prayer or two for Monty. To wish him smooth passage into the afterlife and that he's able to eat all the things he never could. Like chocolate! God, he'd love it if he could have it now.

If there's anything I want left behind, it's this post. I love you, Monty. More than I'll ever love myself or anyone on this earth. You helped me more than medicine or therapy ever could. I love you. I love you. I love you. I hope you get to travel the stars. I hope you make friends. I hope you find grandpa somewhere out there and join him on his adventures.

And to those of you who read this... Thank you. I'm sorry for my silence. I'm sorry for not posting more. I'm sorry for not being here. I'll be here more and more soon. Eventually. Just... not yet.

[zenthejackal]

Book 6 Prediction Worry-Rant

...Oh boy. If someone told me the teaser would've caused me THIS MUCH anxiety, I would've just waited until the full trailer (or even worse, the full-on premiere)! I've been freaking out so hard since Thursday's reveal and only now have I gotten myself relatively under control. It also gave me some time to look at others' speculations and theories, so that always makes me feel better too. But now, I've got some questions about what will happen with this next book, and what it will really mean to be "emotionally wrecked".

Slight disclaimer: I heavily reference the info from the post made here by xadian-daydreams. I'm basing my ideas off of this, but all credit on retrieving this info goes solely to him (assuming him, sorry if I got it wrong!). I'll also have some references about Dark Magic from the Dragon Prince Wiki.

First off, I need to understand more about the real toll of Dark Magic. What we already knew was that using Dark Magic requires some form of sacrifice of a magical being, it leaves some form of corruption on the user (with physical changes depending on the severity), and that corruption can be used by Aaravos as a means of linking them together. The first use is a sort of 'jolt' to the body and results in nightmarish fever dreams but is remediable. Apparently, it amplifies the values/feelings of the user when casting it (according to latest Q&A). It has been constantly been referred to as a shortcut, or 'too easy to use', but isn't technically addicting; if you want to stop, there's no strong resistance to make you keep doing it. However, each time you use Dark Magic, it's harder to come back from it. Personally, I imagine this to your teacher's cheat-sheet for a test: at first you only use it to answer a really hard question, but then you keep using it because it's so much easier than relying on your own knowledge.

I need someone to explain to me: what exactly is the "corruption" of Dark Magic? Does it darken the soul to make it more evil, make you prone to the emotions you felt at the time of casting, or a very subtle way of "changing you from the inside out" without you realizing it?

The reason I'd like to know this first is because now we're looking at our 3 main protagonists: Callum, Rayla, and Ezran. First up is Callum, my personal favorite (yeah, that's right, I'm not ashamed to admit my bias). Going into the next book, the main questions that came up for me were:

How will Callum handle Dark Magic from now on, especially now that Aaravos is closer to him (magically and literally)?

Will it be easier for him to give into Dark Magic's temptation now that he's given into it a second time now?

How does Dark Magic affect the trust/friendship he's created over time?

Up until Book 5, I always assumed that Callum would never use Dark Magic again once he got Primal Magic; his one-time use was out of sheer desperation. Now that he's done it again (and after learning a bit more about his true character and motives), my main concern is that continued usage will continue to change him more and more until he's a very different person, someone Rayla no longer recognizes, let alone loves.

Moving onto Rayla, there was no real "progress" in the latest Q&A concerning her and the coins (writers refused to answer the REALLY juicy stuff), but there's still some things I still want to know:

If she's given a choice between her new and old family, who would she choose?

She has always been the one to be willing to sacrifice everything of herself for the good of others; how far will she go, or is there a line she will no longer cross?

How does she view sacrifice in relation to others, i.e. Callum? Is killing him when possessed his sacrifice or hers? Would she be willing to kill those she loves (not exclusive to Callum on this last part)?

Who does she ultimately choose above the other: Callum and Ezran or the world?

I realize that most of these questions center around Rayllum, but this is just what concerns me the most right now. I definitely want her to grow as an individual too, but this relationship between the two is something very special to me, mostly because of how much stronger they are when they're together! I really miss their chemistry!!

...Ahem, finally, we have Ezran. While he is still a great part of the main team, he is also now king. But we haven't really seen him act as one in the show as of yet; he's only really been ruling on-screen for about 2 episodes, gave into the bargain with Viren to try and prevent mass bloodshed, have a brief meeting with his council after the timeskip, and have some strong speeches concerning Xadia and addressing the dragons/archdragons. ...Okay, so that seems like a lot, but keep in mind, that 1) while there are powerful moments, they are still brief, and 2) all of this takes place over the course of 3 seasons so far, when he has begun his rule. I would personally like to see him act/struggle more as a king, mostly because I still see some naivety in his approach. He still acts a bit childish in his views, kind of like: "this is the right choice, so we'll do it" from a logical side. This view oversimplifies the world, and while he does address this in his powerful speech in Book 4, we haven't seen him really struggle with this notion. Your words aren't as strong if you haven't been hurt as bad, and I know that Ezran has a lot of hurt that he's been hiding. I want to see how he handles it. (No questions regarding Ezran, just speculation this time.)

The final cherry on top: can someone please tell me what "emotionally wrecked" could possibly mean for this upcoming book?!! Every time the writers bring it up, I get nothing but depression with a side of gloom and misery sprinkled on top! The only saving grace we do have from all this... negativity... is that it's coming in the second-to-last book, not the last. This also likely means that whatever horrible tragedies we'll face this book have the chance to be resolved/redeemed in the next one. Additionally, any character arcs/growth we go through will likely either continue over to the final book or will be resolved in time for another one. That being said, PLEASE TELL ME, WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO ACCOMPLISH BY DOING THIS TO US?!! THIS SUSPENCE IS EATING ME FROM THE INSIDE OUT, AND I'VE HAVEN'T EVEN DONE DARK MAGIC YET!!!

...Whew, got that all out of my system. Please reply if you've got any answers or comments, especially with the last part (better to rip the band-aid off now). I love a good dialogue! Just please keep it friendly and civilized. Thanks for listening to my rant, and here's hoping for Dragon Prince's continued success!!!

[bottlecaprabbitgames]

Weekly Update for 27 March, 2023

Howdy, folks! Welcome to the last update of March! Time really has flown, jesus-

Mind Games: Trepidation

Onto our favorite subject! If you guys haven't seen, there have been multiple edits pushed for mostly Chapter 1 and 2 this week! These edits have added new options to some dialogue choices, some customisation choices, and some variation to certain spots where I saw I favored sarcastic MCs over others. There have been a couple of grammar fixes pushed in Chapter 3, 4, and 5, but I have not done a more thorough editing of those chapters; after putting in some achievements, my brain kinda just. Flat-lined and needed a break, lol!

I have gotten LOADS done on Chapter 6! I am actually in Scene 3/4 for the rough draft, with about half of Scene 3's rough draft completed. Again, the rough draft is just me going through and picking one option for each branch and getting through the story so I know where it'll go when I go back to flesh it out! However, that's still a LOT of progress!!! The whole chapter is at about 5,600 words, and before doing the update I had started editing Scene 1 for a bit to start fleshing out so it's not so much work later.

A few things with MG:T:

In case you aren't aware, MG:T is only expected to be 9 Chapters, NOT including Interludes and the Epilogue. We are over 50% done with the game! VERY EXCITING!!! (Especially as I am ITCHING to get to book 2, lol!)

Chapter 6 is expected to be out in April. I will be releasing it in full as I'm expecting it to be a small to average size chapter.

I am always open to feedback and suggestions! Honestly, I would REALLY LOVE for you folks to tell me where you think improvements could be made or where you'd like to see more choices/what kind of choices you want to see more of. Be the change you want to see, lol!!

Remember: Every time an update is pushed, your saves will be corrupted! I try to push things all at once, but I never know how much I'll get done at any one time so sometimes I push smaller updates over a course of a day. If you aren't seeing anything new, it might be because your save is before the update was pushed!

I am still checking this Google Form! I am considering making one that is all about feedback and suggestions, and I DO check the one that's listed there daily! I actually have an active list of suggestions and stuff people have given me, and I do try to take the stuff you guys tell me needs fixing and put those fixes into the game!! Those of you who have answered the feedback section have been amazingly helpful and I appreciate it so much!!!

In case you missed it, I do have a page up now that has a list of all the free scenarios I've posted in the past and present, at least, the ones I could find! It also has a list of sneak peeks from Patreon I've posted! Some of them are a bit outdated as they're from, like, when I first started writing the game back in 2018-2019, but they're still enjoyable!

There is a poll up on Patreon right now that ends in 2 weeks! It's letting Patrons vote for which RO(s) will 100% be featured in April's scenarios for Patreon, and as a special treat, one of the 2 chosen ROs will be available to the lower tier as well! And, the lower tier can always vote in polls. The tier prices are $3 and $10, with $3 opening up polls, a sneak peek, discord benefits, weekly update+ content, and credits mentions (I will be putting every Patron I've had in the past in the credits of the game(s) they were supporting me during development!), with occasional monthly bonuses. The $10 tier opens up EVERYTHING I have, and everything that gets posted monthly!

I think that's all I got to tell y'all this week! See you at the next update! (Where I can hopefully confirm being done with at least one of the scenes in Chapter 6, hehe.)

[twoplayergame]

about your tags on my post, explain to me anything you want about your bmc aus I'm curious

(rubbing my gay lil hands together) you've opened the floodgates i hope you know, so i'm sorry in advance for the walls of text incoming aha.

BUT ANYWAY!!!!

this week (oct 9 to oct 13) is THE exact same dates as the week my LIS AU "Life is Weird" takes place (in 2017 tho), so this infodump will be ALL about that AU in particular!!! also bc the 6-year anniversary of the blog was last month ♥

my icon on this blog is my art from that AU too :]c

EDIT: putting this under a cut actually, so i don't have a mile-long post lol. also, i think i'll make a pinned post with a list of all my other AUs for reference! i have a LOT of half-baked ones i'd love to talk about as well

so:

Life is Weird is a Life is Strange-inspired AU i created in 2017!

the askblog it started with (@asklifeisweird) follows Michael as the protagonist (a la max caulfield), and Jeremy as the equivalent to chloe price.

there's a couple more roles that were originally fairly 1:1 (squip as jefferson, rich as nathan, chloe as victoria, christine as kate, dustin as rachel), but over the years they've mostly grown away from being "reskins" as me and my boyf keep developing the au!

i've also stolen several characters from the BMC book– either entirely or just in name– to fill the background space/chars, since LIS has a whole world of characters and BMC as a musical kinda... didn't, at least back in the day :'D now there's more named bg chars, but keep in mind this AU started before even the 2017 Exit82 revival, so we had uhhh about 11 characters and a book. anyway.

while the askblog itself hasn't exactly gotten very far in the story yet, the au has grown to include more LIS-based ideas as That franchise grew, alongside a lot of our own brainstorming ofc!! there's SEVERAL other stories planned following other characters besides Michael, and a lot of different timelines i'd LOVE to explore (some during blog canon, some just in side stories)

not to mention: since conception, the blog has gone through so many styles of getting the story out there that i consider it a multimedia project at this point. askblog with square panel comics in between, full-on comic pages, writing/fics... and most recently, bust-sprites with different expressions and text in between. i'm also working to add interactive fiction into the mix!!

Michael's story (nicknamed "Redshift" behind the scenes) mostly follows the same beats as the first LIS game, but the further in we get the more we've added to it. i'm especially excited for the LIW-equivalent to the alternate timeline LIS1 shows in (iirc) ep4, as well as the timeline post-Redshift that's inspired by the LIS1 comics :)

shifting tracks, i mentioned this was started Before the first musical revival. because of that and the revival coming out like 2 months later, a lot of the original character designs were based off the 2RT/2015 cast, the E82/2017 cast, or entirely headcanon-based. since then, as more productions happened, appearances have shifted or changed completely!

off the top of my head, some of the more notable ones are:

jeremy: 2RT for current, E82 for younger

brooke: E82 for current, 2RT/NYC for younger

dustin: originally all headcanon, now mainly E82 with some hc

jenna: originally 2RT, now mainly NYC

jake: originally 2RT, now NYC + clothing insp from 2RT

i'd like to take inspiration from other productions as well tbh, but i can't change full appearances much anymore since i've done the fullbody sprites already and i don't wanna completely redraw anyone if i don't have to XD

ok so. i WOULD keep talking but i've realised i have to get ready to see the BACCP production today!!! so i'll leave you off with the AU blogs if you wanna know more or read it or whatever! or feel free to send me more asks, i love this AU with all my heart :]

@asklifeisweird (main/ic askblog)

@bemorestrange (extra content/ooc sideblog)

[submarineno6]

oh my god thank you so much for this blog. I've been obsessed with blue sub no 6 ever since I ended up catching it when it first aired on toonami WAAAAAAY back as a kid when I was like 6/7. I mean, probably shouldn't have, but granted it was the censored version at the very least lol. The creature and character design is still SO good and I love the hints of worldbuilding we've gotten out of the OVAs and just wish they had more time to flesh stuff out and go into things. I too have been casually trying to find any media I can on bsn6 and I would kill for a translation of the graphic arts book especially (at least Mutio's page if anything lmao). Right now my holy grail items are finding more pieces of Takuhito Kusanagi's art done for the OVA that I used to have access to, but the site they were on was taken down at some point several years ago. I've been suffering ever since. (Also if it helps, I do have a good quality full body scan of one of the pieces of Mutio art done that you have in the misc scans folder! I wouldn't mind tossing that your way if needed)

Whoa that's cool! Yeah I'm defo a newbie in this regard, I only discovered Blue Sub this year while scrolling 9anime

Yep, finding any Takuhito Kusanagi stuff is... rough, all I've been able to locate in my free time were dead one-page websites through Wayback Machine. Is your website also inaccessible by Wayback Machine?

More good quality scans would be definitely appreciated! The very purpose of those Dropbox folders is that people could help me fill the collection.

[starswallowingsea]

oops 11pm typing up a review for What Lies in the Woods by Kate Alice Marshall

I got this as my book of the month back in January and after reading the first chapter, kinda put it off because it felt too much like the Slenderman Stabbing case which is a bit too close to home. Picked it up again recently after my wifi went out again and I needed something to read and ended up enjoying it (although my gut feeling was kinda proven right at the end unfortunately). 4/5 stars, full review under the cut, spoilers ahead.

So first things first, this is supposed to be an adult thriller, but it very much reads like YA which doesn't bother me that much but it does for other people so just a heads up on that.

Now to the meat and potatoes. This book follows Naomi Shaw, a mid-30s woman from a middle of nowhere town in Washington state who survived a stabbing attempt when she was 11 while her two best friends watched on. It left her permanently scarred and brought the three of them closer together during the recovery process.

Our story begins when the person they accused of being the one who stabbed them and also of being a serial killer with at least 6 other victims dies in prison from cancer. Naomi gets a call and returns to her hometown for the first time in years and meets up with her two friends who survived the attack with her and one of them says she's tired of hiding their secret.

Oh yeah. When they were 11, they found a skeleton in the woods and began worshiping her as a goddess based on this bead bracelet on her wrist that read Persephone. They had 7 rituals to complete to show their dedication to the goddesses of varying degrees of severity, up to and including self mutilation. Typical 11yo things.

It's not too long after this that the friend who wants to tell their secret winds up dead in the same woods with a gunshot to the head, ruled a suicide despite no weapon being found at the scene and a lack of gun powder on her hands that would indicate self infliction of the wound.

At this point, Naomi suspects there's something going on and decides to look into it more with the help of this podcaster that's been snooping around about the case. There's a lot that begins to happen around this time in the book that gets everything going and makes it a much easier and quick read.

I will say that a lot of the ensemble cast, even the best friends of Naomi, weren't always super well defined but we do have an unreliable narrator in the first person so her biases color a lot of things with regards to the Mayor's family especially. The pieces come together pretty quickly too once you start unraveling the threads of the story and I personally wasn't really gotten by any of the twists all that much. They made logical sense when they were revealed regardless of if I had predicted them or not.

Is it the best thriller out there? No. Is it a good read for the end of summer? I think so. I've been in kind of a reading slump and needed a quick easy read like this to help pull me out and it was still pretty enjoyable. Though I'm still not sure how I feel about any potential parallels with real world cases (again, the slenderman stabbing seems awfully close to what happened here, just without the false accusation of another person as the attacker).

[fregata-magnificens]

10 questions for 10 writers

Thanks for the tag, @arokel! Thanks to today's Windows outage, I actually have time to think about this, lol

(Heads up: I don't actually know enough other writers to tag them, but I'm thrilled that you thought of me!)

1. Is writing a hobby or a way of life?

A hobby. One that sucks me in for a few weeks or months at a time before I lose interest, only for me to catch the bug again a few months (or years) down the road. Hence this tag dead-ending at me.

2. A journal full of notes or a clean completed manuscript?

A secret third thing: a messy brain-dump into several google docs.

3. Who or what inspired your writing?

What inspires me to write? The drive to create. It's one of the easiest, quickest ways for me to get something out of my head and into reality.

Or is it what inspired the way I write? I don't know if I could choose one writer or work. When I really think about it, it's actually (im)probably some of the "classic" stuff I read in high school? I'd say that Ray Bradbury's short stories are one of the things I most look up to as far as writing goes, and I'd like to think I've been influenced by them.

4. Which is worse: Someone you ‘idolize’ reading your first draft or listening to you sing?

I can't sing but I think if someone I really looked up to (and who I didn't trust with my life) got that kind of deep look into my psyche, I would just poof out of existence.

5. Has writing from someone else’s POV changed your perspective?

I wouldn't say that writing from different perspectives has changed my own, at least not directly. But writing "as" different characters is definitely a way for me to explore different aspects of myself.

6. Tumblr, AO3, LiveJournal, or FFN?

AO3. The lack of social media functionality is perfect for a fandom recluse like me. Oh, and the ability to orphan works and delete your profile forever is comforting.

7. AO3 word count? And are you satisfied with it?

Only 20,616. The fact that the words are countable (rather than living somewhere in my head) is plenty satisfying.

8. What movie/book gripped you irrevocably?

By now you've probably gotten the sense that I tend to get obsessed with one thing at a time, so I won't go with my gut, which says "whatever the last thing I really liked was".

But, and this might be an unfortunate answer, but the Harry Potter books. I have so many fond memories of just dropping everything I was doing to devour them, and of the feeling I got whenever I'd put the book down that I just returned from an adventure. I loved that the books grew almost exactly in time with me. I have no attachment to the stories themselves, especially now, but I can't deny that the experience of reading them changed me. It's incredible that stories can have that kind of effect on people.

9. What’s the highest compliment you could ever be given, and have you been given it?

Any compliment I get about my writing is The Highest Compliment I Could Ever be Given, at least at the time. Adjectives like "unique" or "distinctive," when earnestly offered, are some of my favorites.

10. What defines your writing style?

Posting once every three years, lol. But really, looking back at what I've written, it's a little... sparse. I tend to spend a lot of words on the physical environment and what's happening, rather than what's going on in someone's head. It's a balance I'd like to try to strike a little better, but it's very "me".

Oh, and being a stickler about punctuation and formatting. Commas and semicolons and em-dashes all have a specific job to do, dammit!

[televinita]

Library Sale: The Results

I'm actually really glad I only got here for the bag sale, because I genuinely don't know how many of these books I would have bought if I were paying for them individually, but I kinda love like 90% of them now. Which is bad from a "has too many books" perspective but GREAT from my current perspective of being overwhelmed w/ excitement about them.

Anyway, these are the results of me whipping through a room full of books in approximately 40 minutes with no time to second-guess any pulls. This is the closest I will ever come to one of those manic timed shopping sprees that were popular in the nineties.

Part I: Books For A Me!

1. What Happened to Lani Garver - Carol Plum-Ucci (2002): this book made a huge impact on me as a teen, and it held up ten years later. This is a slightly undersized paperback, which I don't love given what it does to the font size and line spacing, but I was excited to find it at all, let alone in new condition!

2. The Body of Christopher Creed - Carol Plum-Ucci (2000): I haven't read this one, but it got more acclaim than the above. I don't think I'll like it as much, but I've long been curious, and my library doesn't have it anymore.

3. Sky on Fire - Emmy Laybourne (2013): I saw post-apocalyptic/survival YA thriller and went YEAH!, but turns out this is actually a sequel to Monument 14, which I've heard of (and was apparently quite popular?), but never actually investigated. There appear to be a LOT of books and I don't know if I'm that interested in "5 kids remain inside the store. one is pregnant. the rest have a blood type that will turn them into bloodthirsty killers if exposed to the air." So this will probably move to the rehome pile. But it is cool that this is the UK edition.

4. The Dirt Diary - Anna Staniszewski (2014): Also definitely a read-and-release, but I'm weirdly drawn to books where the daughter of a housecleaner ends up helping clean her richer classmates' houses and discovers SECRETS.

the contrast between these covers is hilarious 2 me

5. Sabre, The Horse From the Sea - Kathleen Herald (1948; this edition 1963): VINTAGE HORSE BOOK *SNAP* MINE. Alas, having gotten it home, I see it's a bit spotty on the sides, so that won't do. Will have to be a read and release.

(edit: oh damn, this is apparently a pen name for horse book authoring queen K.M. Peyton, AND it's apparently her first novel!)

(oh double damn, Bookfinder has it priced starting at $30 with no ebook so apparently it's gone scarce over the years even for a common paperback edition; booo)

6. The Secret of the Andes - Ann Nolan Clark (1952; this edition 1974): I'm a simple girl; I see a little vintage Scholastic paperback, I buy it. Did not even realize it's a Newbery winner! I probably won't keep it...but I do adore this cover, and it's so small...

7. Brother of the Wolves - Jean Thompson (1978): I am also a simple girl in the way I will see a Weekly Reader edition of a book with animals or Native Americans (or both!) on the cover and buy it.

8. Wren - Marie Killilea (1954; this edition 1968): a children's adaptation of an evidently popular midcentury memoir called Karen (written by the mother of the titular Karen, who had cerebral palsy) that I must admit I don't know. I just saw a girl hugging an Irish Setter on the cover of a vintage paperback - especially since the summary promises to focus on the kid and their pets - and said "gimme." Probably read & release.

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9-10. A pair of Doctor Who Target novelizations: The Day of the Doctor (Steven Moffat) and Twice Upon a Time (Paul Cornell)

I actually just stumbled upon an old post reminding me why I wanted DotD so bad (I should probably actually watch the whole special at some point, maybe). I wasn't sure if I wanted to actually read the one w/ the Twelfth Doctor or if that was going in my resale bag, but who am I kidding...I cling to any non-Eleven Doctor Who stuff I find in the wild like my life depends on it.

----

11. House Warmings: For Those Who Make A House a Home - Patricia Hauck Sprinkle (1992): Total gift book, literally intended as a housewarming gift, I don't need it at all but it was SO PRETTY! It's a slim volume with a puffy cover, featuring little anecdotes (and a definite Christian slant) from the author's life about the houses they lived in and, well, making them...homes. The color illustrations on nearly every page are just so beautifully cozy 90s-ish. See also, the artist's website -- Gail Roth.

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12. A Zoo Man's Notebook - Lee S. Crandall, "in collaboration with William Bridges" (1969): Nonfiction; I literally didn't even flip through this, I just saw "William Bridges" (an early Bronx Zoo director, which I know because I already had one of the many books he wrote about it) and ran. It's packed full of anecdotes and interesting facts about the animals there. Books about zoos were really popular in the latter half of the twentieth century, I've noticed, but seem to have fallen out of fashion. Still, stories about animals never go out of style. Speaking of which...

13. Some Of My Best Friends Are Animals - Terry Murphy ("Director of the Dublin Zoo") (1979): so obviously I was not gonna not take it with that information...another book full of anecdotes and photos. It's surprisingly heavy for not being that thick even using glossy photo paper, which is a pain, but I might keep it anyway.

----

14. Horseplay At White Meadows - Marlene Chase (2013): a cozy mystery of the type that drives me nuts, because they have beautiful sleek hardcovers on very solid bindings, with ribbon bookmarks!, and all in all just look like damn works of art, all for writing that is as basic as can be while still being competent at storytelling. They're really ideal for like, 13-year-olds who want to read Grown Up Books and grandmas who want simple, clean reads (I don't think this is even a murder mystery, it's just someone furtively trying to drive a rival out of business with nefarious "accidents"). But between the cover photo and the fact that there are horses and it's set on a dude ranch, though, I can't give this one up right away.

oops, after all that raving I forgot to take a photo so (weirdly huge) Amazon pic theft it is

15. The Artist's Library: A Field Guide (2014): the only ex-library discard in the batch, I won't keep this long-term but it's a small, sturdy little hardcover and I wanted to look through it. Near as I can tell, it's about celebrating the beauty of public libraries and ways to be creatively inspired while working on projects in a library.

Part II: Books To Rehome

(either to sell to Half Price Books, or I might just put them in Little Free Libraries; depends how long it takes me to collect a full bag and my mood that day)

Last time I just did a cover photo of the pending culls, but this time they're honestly all interesting enough that I wanna talk about 'em, so:

16-18. The Gryphon/Alexandria/The Morning Star - Nick Bantock (2001-2003): the second trilogy, also books 4-6, in the Griffin & Sabine series with removable letters and postcards. Absolutely beautiful books and literal works of art; I already have the full set but it was absolutely KILLING me that these were still there with 25 minutes to go (you fools!), despite one of them having been left flat with cover facing up, so I seized them. I feel like they should have value (I see on the HPB website they have a couple copies priced at $10, so not a lot but standard at least), but I also love them so much that I sort of just want to put them in an LFL so that someone else can have pure treasure.

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19. Pagan Spring (Max Tudor Mystery #3) - G.M. Malliet: I know this doesn't have actual value because it's a random semi-cozy English Village mystery from 2013, but I couldn't help picking it up because it's so pretty! (my motto of the day, apparently) Deckle edges and the endpages are illustrated with a map. Gonna be hard to give up. What if I didn't give it up yet.

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20. Unleashed - Lisa Wogan (2007): this is a smallish photo essay/coffee table book introducing specific dogs by name and the outdoor activity/sport they excel at, from backpacking to windsurfing. It's so cute and I know I would have fallen in love with these dogs and imagined they were mine if I'd read this book as a kid. That's why when I'm done, I'm going to put it in the Little Free Library outside a local elementary school. Kids still like physical books right? At least ones about dogs?

21. The Grace of Dogs - Andrew Root: I saw a dog and put it in the bag. Turns out this is written by a theologian and focuses on what you might expect; sounds boring and I'm happy to send it on.

22. Rescuing Sprite - Mark Levin: I actively disliked this book, but I figure, cute dog on cover might entice someone.

[aetheternity]

Hard Pass P3 (Levi X Reader)

Synopsis: Levi is forced out of his comfy dorm room and in a strange twist of events right into your arms at a college party.

Levi was relieved for the silence as he clicked away at his keyboard. Mike had gone to his only late class of the entire week. Which meant Levi could actually study in his room.

The scent of tea and the small aroma diffuser on his desk as well as the open window in front of him welcomed a nice calming smell that was normally masked by Mike's gym bags and sweaty clothes. Which reminded Levi of the laundry he would have to do soon.

He pressed his tea cup to his lips feeling a twinge of irritation as he was interrupted by two knocks on the door. He looked down at the time. 6:15. A little too early for Mike to be back complaining that he'd forgotten his keys.

Then it was probably one of his girls complaining that she'd left her shit in the room. If Levi had a dollar for the amount of times that had happened he could pay for a new roommate.

The next couple knocks were a bit louder. "Levi? It's Y/N.."

Y/N?!

His face practically exploded. He stood far too fast because just as quickly he was flopping over his stupid desk chair and hitting the floor with a hard thud. He gasped audibly tugging at his knee and gritting his teeth.

"Levi? Are you ok?" Came her voice again.

He pulled himself up with a huff and staggered over to the door. Unsurprisingly he had to limp. With a quick turn of the lock he yanked open the door right into his forehead. God fucking dammit.

He groaned in a mix of fury and disgust partially because he'd idiotically stood so close when opening the door and partially because he hated the stupid inanimate object.

"Oh my god! Are you ok?" Y/N gasped, squeezing herself inside and shutting the door behind her. "Let me see? Did you hit your eye?" She asked

Her fingers were so delicate as she brushed aside his hands. So close.. Her thumb traced the already appearing red spot on his forehead. Soo close.. She brushed his hair to the side cupping his cheeks to gently reposition his head towards the light. Close....

She breathed out a little chuckle. "It's probably gonna bruise."

Levi barely registered her words. Occupied with her beautiful eyes illuminating moonlight and the dim lights in his room. His lips parted ever so slightly. When her hands fell away he gulped and jerked his head back. Trying to find literally anything to take the edge off.

"I'll.. go find you an ice pack, ok?" Y/N began already heading for the door.

"K-knee.." Levi tried and mentally cursed himself.

"Huh?" She asked, turning back.

"M-my.. t-two please.."

Her smile was gentle, "Two ice packs. Got it." And with a little wave she was out the door. Her lingering touch still causing heat to pool in Levi's chest.

~~~~

"Aww sweetie, are you sure you're ok?"

He was not. Definitely not. One of her hands was on his uninjured knee and the other was brushing his hair away from the ice pack. He didn't even know if he'd breathed in the last 20 minutes. His brain echoing the word sweetie.

The two of you had been sat on his bed as he uncomfortably laid his head back on the wall. Trying and failing to not fixate on your touch. Every brush of your fingertips was downright intoxicating.

"You look kinda red. Do you wanna try seeing a doctor or something?"

"N-no.." It was barely audible but he knew she heard when she nodded.

If there was a hole nearby he would crawl into it and never come out. Though he also didn't wanna move as the fear of making this situation worse for himself stayed ever present.

"Let me see?" He partially removed the ice pack from his forehead, spine tingling over the way she sucked in a breath. "You should be more careful."

Levi didn't answer. Just squeezed his legs closer together and sighed. In all the time he'd been in this room he'd never hit himself in the face with the door. Just what kind of power did this girl have over him.

"I know because my little cousin has done stuff like this but you should put some cream on the bump so that it doesn't get redder and it'll go down faster."

Little cousin? That wasn't a fair comparison. Little kids do stupid things cause they're kids. Did she think about him that way? Uggghhhh.

He was yanked from his thoughts by her hand coming down to squeeze his. "Are you positive you're ok? Do you need anything else?"

"I-I'm fine.."

Just as Levi said that his attention was brought to the door. Mike had barely stepped into the room and he was already grinning like a fucking idiot.

"Well, hello." He greeted, stepping closer. "Levi, you didn't tell me you were inviting anyone over. Especially not a pretty girl."

Y/N's chuckle was nervous, "Hello, you must be Levi's roommate." She stuck her hand out which Mike immediately took placing one hand on top of their joined hands.

"And you must be Y/N." He said "I've heard so much about you."

His teasing was met with a glare that could slice concrete. If Levi had known Mike was gonna come straight back to the room he definitely would've gotten rid of Y/N sooner.

"Oh? Really?" Y/N turned to look at Levi behind her. "You told him about me?" It was a split second thing but Levi could've sworn her features softened.

"Oh, no I meant Hange." Mike replied

"Oh."

Oh? Was she disappointed? It sounded disappointed? Did she want Levi to talk about her?

"But at no point did Hange tell me you were this pretty. Neither did Levi honestly, I'm kinda disappointed."

Alright that's enough of that. Levi stood. Placing the ice packs on his bed.

"You should probably leave." He gritted his teeth at how harshly it came out.

Now Mike was letting go of Y/N's hand. "Oh wait! I came to get my phone. Hange said you had it."

Levi blinked. He'd almost forgotten about that. It had been sitting on his desk since yesterday. His knee was screeching in absolute horror as he staggered his way over to his desk.

"What the hell happened to you?" Mike asked, clearly trying to hold back a snicker.

"Aw, it was an accident. I scared him."

Levi returned with the phone shooting daggers into Mike who pretended not to notice.

"Thank you." She breathed a sigh of relief.

"Y-yeah.."

"Did you put your number into it?"

Levi's face perked up a little. "Yes."

"Ok, then I'll text you later." She assured, brushing her finger tips over his forehead once again. "Goodnight boys." And with those last words she took off.

"Faking an injury?! I didn't think you had it in you!" Mike celebrated as soon as she was gone.

"Dickhead." Levi scoffed.

"Hey, is that any way to talk to the best friend who just confirmed your biggest fear moot?" Mike plopped down on his bed with a playful huff.

Levi flopped down into his desk chair, staring up at the ceiling. "One you're definitely not my best friend especially after that shit. And two I'm not you I don't fake shit to get girls."

"That would totally be hurtful if it wasn't true." Mike shrugged "I meant the fact that she doesn't have a boyfriend."

Levi practically flipped himself out of his chair. "How do you assume that."

"Simple. Hange told me about her ex boyfriend. By the way it was probably that guy that took her from the library that day. And Hange says that a lot of guys find Y/N attractive. Because of this her ex got too overprotective and they broke up. But he had no reason to be because Y/N would always tell people she had a boyfriend or at least around Hange she did."

Levi stared at his barely drunk tea. The liquid probably cold after being left on the table so long. So she had dated that guy.. He had been so tall and pretty muscular looking, was that her type? She didn't seem like she was going to get back together with him.. but he was still around.

"All I'm saying is she seems loyal. You better snatch her up before someone else does or she gets back together with her ex."

His attention was drawn away by his phone softly buzzing on his table. He pressed the on button, swiping his pin and clicking the notification as it popped up.

Hey Levi, it's Y/N.

Listen ik you said you're ok but I bought you some cream just in case. I'll bring it to you tm ;)

His heart fluttered and ached remembering her touch and her kind words. If he didn't full blown know Mike was staring at him he would probably hug his phone.

~~~~

Too much time had passed and suddenly the whole school was on break. Levi had been dreading this. Not because he was a workaholic like Mike claimed but because he knew Hange was gonna drag him away and make him vacation.

And no form of vacation could possibly be more relaxing for him than curling up in bed with some books, doing some casual cleaning, and drinking tea with light music playing at all times. Mike was definitely going home during this time so it'd be the perfect way to spend his break.

But Hange's family owned a couple lodges and that meant another year of begging for Levi to come ski and freeze his fingers and toes off.

"Come on, Levi!"

"Absolutely not."

"Erwin!" Hange called to him where he sat on Levi's bed, scrolling through his phone.

"You knew he was going to say no." Erwin replied

"Which is why I brought you to help me make my case." Hange complained

"You clearly made an error in judgment then." Erwin retorted

Mike laughed from where he was laying on his own bed. "Might as well give it up Hange, Levi is just too stubborn about this. We all know he wants to be close to all my junk while I'm gone cause he'll miss me."

"I wouldn't hesitate to tell your stalker where you're going over break." Levi spat

"She'll figure it out anyway. She's a high class stalker. And I'm not her first." The room fell in uncomfortable silence but Mike just leaned back giving his full attention to his phone screen.

"That disturbing remark aside.." Erwin began shaking his head. "I'm going."

"And that's supposed to change my mind? How'd Hange force you into it?"

"It may stun you but I chose to go through with this all on my own. There are studies that claim it's good for the mind to get away from normality during breaks or away from your comfort zone to properly clear your mind. It'll also help you make less mistakes when classes resume."

Hange smiled, "Yes, that's exactly what I was thinking."

Levi rolled his eyes. "If I go you can't beg me next year." Hange's loud shrill screeching made Levi's heart drop out of his ass.

"Finally!!" Hange screamed in excitement as she wrapped her arms around Levi's neck.

"Get off already! You're such a pest!"

And that was how Levi ended up on a train for almost three long hours with Hange blabbering on about nothing and Erwin sat in the seat across from the two of them listening to podcasts while staring out the window of his own very sad music video.

And all of the crap Erwin had spewed about getting away being more relaxing proved to be completely from the ass as Levi shivered along wrapped in two scarves, a pair of gloves, his long green coat that fell around his ankles and a winter hat plopped over his ears.

"Walk faster Levi! Is that the best your little legs can do?!" Hange called, somehow racing her way up the slope with three bags. One that wasn't even hers

Levi grunted in irritation. Not only were they walking up a hill but it was covered in snow so deep that every step felt like he was falling.

"Do you need help?" Erwin asked, not waiting for Levi to respond as he hoisted the overnight bag off his shoulders.

Levi just huffed. "I swear Hange was made in a lab."

"As possible as that is, Hange was basically raised in the snow so this is the equivalent of dust for her." Erwin replied as the two of them trudged along.

"Her parents own multiple ski lodges why the hell did we go to the one up a fucking hill."

"The other closest one was more than 6 hours away. Did you really wanna be stuck on a train with Hange for more than 6 hours?"

Levi just groaned as they finally walked through the surprisingly big doors of the huge ski lodge. Hange raced over to the front desk as Erwin slipped onto the lobby couch, followed by Levi who was still kicking snow off his boots and his second bag.

"What's in that bag?" Erwin questioned, nodding to the luggage Levi had yanked over his lap.

He exhaled loudly giving the bag a couple soft pats. "Clothes, extra boots, extra gloves, two bottles of cleaner and a small box of tea as well as some light reading material."

"When are you gonna have time to read? We're going to be skiing most of the time we're here."

"If you think I'm getting on a ski lift you have less working brain cells than Hange."

Erwin smirked with a roll of his eyes, "Alrighty then, what's in this bag."

"All of the shit that didn't fit in this bag, toothpaste, toothbrush, cologne, extra pairs of underwear-"

"Woah, Levi you can't just talk about your underwear in a public space." Erwin chuckled at his own joke.

Levi rolled his eyes, "It's bad for your health to hang around Mike as often as you do."

"How is it you're not dead yet then?" Erwin retorted

Hange had been chatting up the receptionist for almost 15 minutes, bouncing up and down in front of the desk and indulging him in the stories of their travel up here. The man just gave her a sheepish grin and honestly Levi felt a little bad for the man but a little less when he thought about how it wasn't his problem anymore.

Moblit.. his name tag read. Somehow Hange's mannerism seemed more crazed with him if that was even possible.

"Yeah.. it has been so long." He heard the man say. You got.. taller..

"We're never getting out of this lobby are we?" Erwin sighed as the two continued to chatter on. Levi and Erwin stared as Hange continued on about her car with a surprising amount of engagement from the other party. "You know they kind of remind me of you and-"

"Hey, Hange!" Erwin cut himself off as a brown haired girl that Levi instantly recognized hopped down each step, a bald boy following her. And Levi believed he remembered them from Y/N's stories as Connie and Sasha who he remembered from the party.

"Hange, what're you doing here?" He asked as the brown haired girl gave her a hug.

"My family owns the lodge so I brought Erwin and Levi for the break!" Hange said, pulling Connie into side hug that he immediately reciprocated.

"Oh god! Why didn't you tell me your plans for break? Jean would've driven all of us up here and you wouldn't have had to waste gas."

Hange just shook her head. "It's quite alright I was already out of gas so we just took the train up here."

"You didn't put gas in your car again?" Connie asked

"Wait, if you guys came then does that mean Y/N is here?" Hange asked completely dodging Connie's question.

At her name Levi bounced out of his seat. Almost launching himself into the spot next to Erwin. Pulling his hat over his eyes and sliding his back as far into the chair as he could.

"What's up with you?" Erwin questioned

"I embarrassed myself last time I was with Y/N.."

"What? Didn't she buy you cream like a month ago?"

"Y-yeah." Levi shimmied his feet together as he slid further down in his seat.

Erwin's chuckle next to him made him grimace. "I know you don't really get it Levi. But uh, making an ass out of yourself in front of your crush is the first real hurdle to knowing you've got it bad."

"Shut up.."

"It could've been worse.. You could've accidentally injured her. Or got caught by the loud mouth in your class while writing her first name and your last name in a notebook."

"Sounds like a personal story.." Levi replied, inching the hat off his eyes to look up at Erwin.

Erwin scoffed, "Point is it happens." He said with a roll of his eyes.

Levi let out a little snicker that instantly got caught in his throat. It had never occurred to him that he'd actually paid attention to the romance movies he'd seen a hundred times with his mother. But now that Y/N was walking down the stairs it was like a scene from all of those movies combined.

Her smile just as warm as always. Turtleneck sweater hugging her features along with dark blue jeans and brown boots. Each step felt slower than the last as if everything in this particular room had been put on the slowest speed imaginable.

The butterflies in his stomach swarmed like they were all chasing after one specific thing. Everytime she appeared somehow it was different.

"We're still going skiing today right?" Connie questioned as Y/N stopped on the last stair.

"If Jean's up to it sure." She replied, her cheeks flushed like she'd just walked in from outside.

"Well this is gonna be a fun weekend." Erwin said but Levi didn't even register his words. His heart stammering in his chest. "Go make a fool out of yourself." Erwin nudged

"Hey Jean! Come on!" Connie said

"Yeah, Jean I'm hungry!" Called Sasha

Levi's heart stopped, his chest crumbling in on itself. The same guy from before.. just as soon a loud crash sounded and everyone turned all at once.

"Oh god are you ok?!" Y/N was the first person by Hange's side followed by Moblit from behind the counter.

Hange let out a laugh, wincing as she pulled herself up with Moblit and Y'N's help.

"I'll be ok. Just took a little spill." She continued to laugh.

Erwin was soon standing by her side. "Are you sure, you're alright? Your face is super red.."

A momentary lapse in Hange's facial features made Erwin step back a little. "Shut up Erwin." She huffed

"You fell on your side. You should rest a little bit." Moblit said, coming closer. "Just.. in case."

"Ok.." Hange replied

Y/N seemed to relax at this information. Her gaze immediately falling on Levi surprisingly. He really hoped he didn't outwardly wince.

"Hi, Levi." She spoke plainly giving Erwin a small greeting as well before her, Connie, Sasha, and Jean were leaving the lobby.

Hange and Erwin unsurprisingly crowded into Levi's room about five minutes after the whole ordeal. But Levi couldn't even bring himself to wipe one thing down like he'd wanted to. He just laid still on the bed, eyes planted to the ceiling.

Surprisingly Hange had also stayed silent. Her eyes shut where she laid next to Levi.

"I can't believe you broke the handle on my luggage Hange." Erwin called still sat on the floor holding his luggage in one hand and the handle in the other. Pressing the broken part of the handle to his bag as if it'd be that simple to fix.

"Now what am I supposed to do?"

"It broke my fall Erwin. Be grateful."

"For what exactly?"

"I don't know!"

Levi blinked, his gaze falling on Hange for the first time since she took that spill in the lobby. Her hands were crossed over her stomach, thumbs rubbing the spot where she fell.

"Are you alright or not?" Levi questioned

"I'm fine."

"Ok, I know why Levi's upset but why're you?" Erwin chimed up

"What's Levi upset about?"

"What else? Y/N."

"Uggggghhh Levvviiiii why don't you just ask her out already?" Hange said

Levi sat up on the bed pulling his feet into his chest. Shoes long gone, pushed up against the wall as soon as they'd walked into the room.

"I'm not talking about this shit anymore this week."

"Levi, if we're staying here all of this week and next then chances are she's also staying here all week and next. Which means somewhere in here is a perfect opportunity to-"

"Get in her bed." Hange interrupted

"Or something less crass." Erwin suggested "You did pack condoms in your emergency undies bag right?"

"Did you pack a spare handle in yours?"

Hange's obnoxious laughter was almost loud enough to muffle the low knocks on the door. Her irritating jabs to Levi's shoulder quickly halting when Levi grabbed her fingers.

"Who is it?" Erwin asked, one hand on the door.

"It's Y/N.."

Now Hange stopped laughing. Erwin shrugged as he looked back at both of them before pulling the door open.

"Hey, here." Y/N sounded filled with fatigue as she handed over a small bottle to Erwin.

"Oh! Thank you! Where'd you get this?" Erwin smiled with delight immediately flopping back down next to his bag.

"Jean carries around extra strength glue because Connie always manages to break something fragile." Y/N replied "I doubt it'll work but maybe it'll help a little?"

Erwin nodded happily as Y/N turned to look at Hange. Her hands balled up and her fingers fidgeting where she was pulling at them.

"How's your rib Hange?"

"It's ok now, thanks for asking."

Y/N nodded and at this moment everyone in the room was looking at Levi who automatically felt extremely naked.

"Levi um.. can I talk to you? In the hall?"

Levi didn't know if he had nodded in his head or in real life but he was swiftly moving across the room. Passing Y/N where she stood and then holding the door open as she walked out just behind him. The door shut behind the two of them and if Levi felt naked before the feeling out here was somehow worse.

"What happened?"

Levi could hear the slightly muffled footsteps on the other side of the door and even a whispered Hange as Y/N spoke. His hands felt both too dry and wet all at once as he looked into her mildly menacing gaze.

"Wh- where wh-when.."

"You barely said anything to me after I brought the cream for your forehead. What happened? Did I do something wrong?"

Oh god how can she possibly assume that? Levi felt his stomach clench. He had never had it easy with text, which was why he pretty much always called everyone.

"I-I didn't mean.. it um.." He shuffled his feet a bit now remembering that he still had no shoes on.

Y/N sighed. "I wanna be your friend Levi. Please tell me you want that too."

With a deep breath he replied, "Call me."

"When?"

"Anytime.. I'm a bad t-texter.."

When her facial features softened Levi felt his shoulders finally sag for the first time since he'd heard her name in the lobby. "Ok.. oh ok, that's all it was? I thought I did something wrong. I'm glad we talked."

And Levi was barely registering her hands wrapping around his shoulders. Her body pressing oh so comfortably close to his. Hand sliding over his back, scent overwhelming his nose. And then just as soon it was all being taken away.

"I'll call you, ok?"

"Ok.." Levi's hand was still waving long after she'd already disappeared out of plain view.

"Oh god you're her friend!" Hange laughed the door suddenly yanked open behind Levi.

"It's as cute as it is sad." Erwin clicked his teeth.

"Tch, shut up." Levi stomped back into the room.

"Levi, you're in the friendzone!" Hange huffed as Erwin shut the door. "And if you don't get out of it. You're gonna be the short shoulder to cry on when some big dude with an invalid drivers license, a shit ton of tattoos and a porn addiction breaks her heart."

"That's oddly specific.." Erwin retorts

"All of you keep assuming I wanna be her boyfriend. I don't!"

Erwin rolled his eyes, "That tall guy that she was with actually. I think he'll be the guy who has her running to Levi's shoulder."

"Oh you mean Jean?" Hange nods "But they broke up a while ago."

"Then why is she still hanging out with him?"

"He's Sasha and Connie's best friend. So they've all known each other a while. They're a set, don't separate type deal."

"Then it's only logical that Y/N will marry Jean someday. You know if they all stay so close."

"Yup, definitely."

"You can both eat shit."

~~~~

Day one

Levi strained awake, blinded by the harsh sunlight stabbing his eyes through the uncovered window. He couldn't even remember when he'd fallen asleep last night but he could already tell it was too early for everyone else to be awake.

He could recall a couple things from last night. Hange overstaying her welcome in his room, Erwin suggesting that Hange pay for his fucked up luggage and somethings he would rather not think about.

Preferably the others joining in his room to discuss breakfast plans. At which Sasha had suggested the diner they had already planned to go to early in the morning. Levi's heart sank as he recalled Y/N's gorgeous smile directed to Jean who had stood behind her rubbing her shoulders and whispering in her ear.

He squeezed his eyes shut, standing from his bed and immediately working to straighten out the sheets before eyeing the book he'd unpacked last night.

Maybe he could get some reading done before Hange inevitably came to annoy him.

The one he was currently holding was of a dog wearing a big floppy hat in the mist of sunflowers. He quickly matched it with his black and white sweatpants. And with a small sigh he headed to the bathroom.

He thumbed at the spine of the book, sliding his finger between the pages to the current bookmark. A shower would probably be a better start to the morning though. He set the book down unzipping one of his bags and pulling out the first pair of clothing folded at the top. Levi hadn't remembered packing one of his mother's many silly birthday gifts to him. She had always bought him shirts with pictures on them that confused him.

He didn't even remember the last time he'd had a shower that was hot for more than five minutes. Or the last time he could look down at his feet without seeing a hair monster in the drain.

He took a couple extra minutes to completely wash his hair, combing his fingers through the strands before shutting off the water and quickly getting dressed.

As he reentered his room he remembered the random gaze Jean threw his way. The smirk on his lips, the taunting glare and then just as quickly it was over. And he was talking to her like nothing had happened.

Levi had never once in his entire life thought about having a girlfriend. It just wasn't something that absorbed his thoughts but he knew the second he saw that smirk on Jean's face what he wanted to be to Y/N.

He just couldn't imagine how.

His fluffy towel hugged his head as he popped open the book he'd discarded a couple minutes ago. He pulled his feet in closer to his body tracing the letters on the page, delving into the story-

"Levi!"

Two fucking seconds.. that had to be a new record.

A barrage of harsh knocks sounded outside his door and he yanked it open to see Hange standing there out of breath with a barely alive looking Erwin behind her. Excitement flooding her features as she pushed past Levi with Erwin in tow. A blue toothbrush almost falling from his lips.

"You couldn't let him finish brushing his fucking teeth?" Levi grunted, shutting the door behind the two of them. Erwin sighed his eyes shut, toothbrush dangling from his mouth. "Why're you here?"

"We're all going for breakfast remember?"

"Not for another thirty minutes." Levi narrowed his eyes and leaned back against the tv table.

Hange smiled, "Yup and that means we have enough time to figure out a game plan to get you and Y/N together by the end of today." Hange clapped excitedly though both Erwin and Levi couldn't possibly look less enthused.

"I don't need your help."

"Erwin, back me up here!"

"I'm not doing shit since you didn't let me spit and I had to swallow toothpaste." Erwin remarked, squeezing the bridge of his nose.

Levi's face scrunched up and Hange let out a snort. "Why did you swallow it.. you could've just spit it out in the hall or something."

"That's fucking disgusting." Levi grunted

"Why the hell would I do that?" Erwin asked

"You're not supposed to swallow toothpaste duh!"

Everyone huffed all at once and Levi flopped down next to Erwin on the bed. "If I need any help I'll ask.." He mumbled already feeling heat fly to his cheeks.

"We're finally gonna get you a girlfriend Levi!!" Hange squeezed his body in a tight hug.

Just as Levi was about to push her away a couple of soft knocks sounded on his door again, "We're leaving a little earlier, hurry and come downstairs."

~~~~

Before the car had even pulled up back at the lodge Hange was already screaming about going skiing. Erwin had asked if Levi wanted to which he'd replied with a scoff.

"Really? Cause there are plenty of chances for Y/N to fall on you. Or you to fall on her." He shrugged.

Levi just rolled his eyes and at that Erwin gave up and now he was standing at the freezing cold railing watching everyone go down the stupid slope for what had to have been an hour or so. How'd he end up with bag watch? He didn't even wanna come outside.. He blew on his fingers trying and falling to warm them. At this point he felt exhausted, absolutely none of his clothes were keeping him warm.

With a sigh he pulled Hange and Erwin's bags up onto his shoulder along with Sasha and Connie's belongings. If he could manage to get upstairs he could warm up at least a little. A hot cup of tea practically beckoning him.

It took him only a couple seconds to realize he didn't have Y/N's bag. He looked around for a couple seconds. Did she bring a bag outside? Did he lose her bag?? He'd only left once to got to the bathroom. Did someone steal it.. Shit. He grumbled in disgust. Where could he have left it?

Feeling a bit panicked he headed towards the stairs. Blood running cold, his eyes practically bouncing out of his skull. His heart stopped at the display in front of him. Jean's hand on Y/N's waist as she leaned forward on the railing. Their lips pressed together..

(Hey Siri, play Heartbreak Anniversary by Giveon.)

[noahstayed]

Sorry if you've already answered these questions but I still want to ask them so...

1) Are you going to make another book after Earthshine?

(If the answer is yes; (and you don't have to answer this one,) Are you going to do a time skip or will you go the 'the condom broke'?)

2) Will Edward have a mate (If yes; will you create an OC or simply pluck a character from the twilight saga archives are revamp them?)

3) If you do make a version of Breaking Dawn, will it have the same premise (Ie. Wedding, Honeymoon, (I typed hUMANmoon and then corrected it, don't know why my fingers went there.) surprise pregnancy (or not? Because Carlisle is a DOCTOR) turning, then the Volturi going all "We must kill the child!"?)

4) With regards to question three, in the (honestly, and sadly, unlikely) ( completely forgot what word I was going to type, and It as too much trouble to type that so I'm just going to use another word that won't flow as well) situation (I'm so unhappy with this word, my stomach is turning something fierce, man.) that you DO go the standard "with the other book as a very, very, loose guideline) Would you go the route of OYH or would make an entirely new plot?

Also, if you do go with the same general outline, (which is unlikely since Irina isn't with Laurant in newmoon but with Charlie, so there's no bitter feelings and she won't immediately go to the kings before she's heard Carlisle's explanation.) How would you make that work?

5) I know you said that if you do make a fourth book you would just use the dhampire from OYH, Elisha, does that still reign true? Or are you planning to make a new character entirely?

6) If you do make a fourth, and go the OYH route, would you still make Elisha Emse's mate, like in OYH? Or will you go with Garette?

7) Also, since you have previously made an ff about Garette and Bella having a brother-sister type friendship would we see that and get to see Garette claim her as his sister and charlie as his father, and everyone goes along with it? (Honestly, I REALLY want this to happen, especially since I've spent the last hour scrolling through your tumbler and stumbled upon the 'I'm older than my father' post.)

8) Really, all these questions border on the main one of "is there going to be a breaking dawn/part 4-5 (depending) in your rewrite?" but if you do, would Carlisle buy Isle Bella as a honeymoon present of would that be in the oneshots book (that you'll hopefully be writing after this is over) as like a "Have fifteenth anniversary" thing?

9) Are you going to write a book full of random one-shots you couldn't fit into your story? I REALLY HOPE SO.

enthusiastically hope so. :) (that's really a tense smile with eyes SHINING with hope. Just informing you that you'll be crushing my heart. Brutally. With a stake. No pressure :) )

10) If you don't write the fourth book will we get an epilogue with the wedding five years later? Like, with Bella being SUPER nervous?

And finally, 11) (I really want a war to showcase Bella's awesome vampire powers (because you've stated (in a previous Tumblr post) that you'd give Bella her BAMF!Bella OYH powers)) So if there's a part four, even though the Volturi is "lawful" and like, has a brain, in your series, can they like have a brain fart where they go. "He's making an army," Or just straight up CANNON!Aro with his need for power be like "It's an immortal child, and it needs to be destroyed." But really be thinking, "They're growing too large, already their numbers rival our own, they must be put down! This is the perfect time!" Like the (cowardly) power-hungry and villainess we all know and love. Kinda.

I have other questions but those can really wait lol.

I basically want breaking dawn and the third (Do you count Charlie's book as part of Bella's story or as a stand-alone since you weren't really progressing the plot very much (also a very good way to have a time skip in your main)?) isn't even done yet.

I don't know if you can tell, but I've been reading this series for three days straight (new fan!) and just started your OYH series and I'm just filled with a desire right now. Like, I typically hate sex scenes in a twilight book (but that's because I was a child when these movies came out (saw them all in theatre!) and still was when I read the books, so Bella is SACRED lol, and It just makes me uncomfortable to imagine her in those positions (it's like a trauma okay?) but I really enjoyed your stories (even if I basically glossed over your sex scenes and read through them quickly) and could actually sit through your sex scenes (mostly, because it wasn't INTENSE! Like, a lot of rewrites turn breaking dawn into literal Porn and sully the books for me because they basically remove a lot of plot to make room for Bella's sudden appetite, and while, yes, you gave her an appetite and... I am just really enjoying your stories and how you write so Thank You.

Okay, I've let you know your appreciated and put out my question into the tumblr universe so now I just have to wait for you to see this and maybe respond.

I hate waiting.

I haven't gotten an ask in a while and AJKHFJKHD Listen!! THE FACE I MADE AT HOW LONG THIS IS??? Superb!! I'm honored you've taken the time to write this all out so I'm gonna try to answer you as best as I can!!

Right now I'm 100% sure that there will be a couple of Novellas/Novelettes directly after Earthshine. The Renee Story, the Charlie Story, and the Roommate Story which all will get maybe 40k and mini plots that are far more focused than Charlie's first story. Charlie's new story will be focused on his relationship with Carlisle too, so that should be fun!

Edward having a Mate is still up in the air at the moment. Since he is still very young, I don't see the need to really give him someone so quick when other characters have waited WAAAY longer. As for who it might be, that's also still up in the air in case I want to do a short story with him that's a part of a series of Novellas after the main books

If I do make a BD rewrite IT WILL have wedding/honeymoon/surprise pregnancy then it will PRETTY MUCH go off the rails from there because the Pregnancy will be VASTLY different. Carlisle is a Doctor and Bella isn't an idiot. They won't be in Washington either.

Again. The first half will be loosely based on the book and then just go completely off the rails because, Like you said, the Volturi have brains and I LOATHE an 'idiot' plot where people are required to suddenly become stupid for the story to work. As for the OYH route, I will be borrowing a couple elements from OYH but the conflict will be very different.

Elisha is baby and there's no way I could make another Dhampir at this point. Not with how much I love him.

The aging process will work differently in this fic for Dhampirs, so this question is irrelevant since Elisha will be a child for the entire fourth book. As for when he's older, Its still up in the air for this series. He deserves to be baby and I very much dislike the trope of age faster = mentally develop faster because that's BS.

We'll see, I love Bella and Garrett, but there's A LOT I'll have to cram into the last book so we'll just see.

As much as I'd love to answer this, I'm covering the honeymoon in the fourth book so you'll see what happens in there ; )

I HAVE PLANS for random one shots. I REALLY DO. I just has so little time to work on the main story so I might write some when Earthshine is done! I have a name for the one-shot collection already too and some Ideas!

I very much plan to write the fourth book you'll be fine. Bella will not be nervous, she'll be WAY more anxious about it going right. Mostly her nerves will be from anticipation and excitement because she'll be 23 and be very secure in her forever with Carlisle.

There will be a fight in book four that will not have the Volturi turning stupid. Don't worry about how.

Charlies little story is a Novella so I don't count it as a book.... GOD hearing you plowed through the series in so short a time is MIND boggling. I get people telling me this occasionally and I NEVER stop being amazed by it!

As for the sex scenes, yeah, I didn't want this to be erotic literature. I frequently scream that 'THIS ISN'T A SMUT BOOK' because them having sex is just a normal healthy thing that happens in relationships and wanted to show that. The sex scenes I write tend to be glossed over anyways so I'm glad it was readable for you. I get feeling frustrated and wanting more plot, but there are plenty of people who prefer the very explicit smut.

If sex scenes aren't your cup of tea, that's fine. I don't view Bella as pure and innocent though. It teeters dangerously on the Madonna/Whore dichotomy to act like she is. I get wanting to preserve the innocence of your childhood through her. That's not me though. Bella/Carlisle's relationship is highly sexual in nature within SoG and that's ALRIGHT too!

Thanks for the super long ask!!! it was great to read and fun to respond to!

[commodorecliche]

Hey Lindsay, I've read a few of your fics and I love the way you write :) I've been trying to write a story but i'm just stuck at the outline. So, I was wondering if you could, perhaps, make a little tutorial or a walk-through your process? I'd like to have my story points defined before I start writing but I don't have a structure that I can follow and I really love your style *-* It's okay if you don't feel like it though. I understand. Thank you in advance ^^

hey there friend! i’m not sure when you sent this ask today, i so hope you haven’t been waiting all day for my reply!! i just saw it.

first things first - thank you so much for your kind words about my writing. they really mean the world to me. and i am SO EXCITED to hear that you’re working on your own fic. that’s amazing!! 

now to the meat!

so i don’t know if i have specific or... super organized... process, per se, and i don’t really do a ‘strict’ outline, in the most traditional sense of the word (meaning i don’t have a document full of numbers and bullet points and such). and everyone’s process is going to be a little different, so bear in mind, what works for me might not work for you. but once you get the feel of writing your story, you’ll get a better sense of what your own writing process is. and you’ll figure out what works and doesn’t work for you. the way i do things might not work for you, but that’s totally okay, you’ll come into your own as you go along. and hey, maybe this will work for you! who knows!

but what i generally do when i start a new fic is:

1: i type out my rough and basic idea. i like to do this (and most of my outlining/drafting) in all caps, it helps keep me focused and helps me organize what i have ‘drafted’ and what i have properly written lol.

so for example, um, In the House We Remain, my first idea was jotted out like this, at the top of my document: SAPPY GHOST STORY, AZIRAPHALE BUYS A COTTAGE THAT CROWLEY USED TO OWN, CROWLEY DIED THERE. CROWLEY WAS AN AUTHOR AND HIS BOOKS ARE STILL IN THE HOUSE, WHICH IS HOW AZIRAPHALE GETS TO KNOW HIM.

that’s my base level idea, and i kept it at the top of the document.

2: from there, i start thinking about what are some MAJOR scenes i want to have happen. not the minute details, just the major scenes that were popping in and out of my head when i was daydreaming about the fic. these can be as minimal or as thorough as you like. for In the House We Remain, i had a pretty set idea on how i wanted the story to progress from start to finish, so i had a lot of scenes already in mind.

using the same fic as an example, these are some of the scene ideas i wrote in my fic document, underneath my top line idea: SCENES: - AZIRAPHALE SEES THE COTTAGE (ANATHEMA IS THE REAL ESTATE AGENT) AND HE LOVES IT. HE BUYS IT THAT DAY. (DEFINE THE LANDSCAPE AND HOW THE COTTAGE LOOKS, PROBABLY WANT A POND IN THE BACK, THAT COULD BE HOW CROWLEY WAS MURDERED. COTTAGE SHOULD BE COZY AND DREAMY, A LOVELY THING SET OUT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE COUNTRYSIDE. LOOK UP PICS FOR REFERENCES.) - GUNNA HAVE TO MENTION SOMETHING ABOUT THE HOUSE THAT’LL CONNECT TO HOW CROWLEY DIED, SOME VISUAL INDICATORS OF HIS SPIRIT. MAYBE WATER STAINS ON THE FLOOR? LIKE DRIPPING WATER MIGHT POOL AROUND A WET PERSON’S FEET? AM I GOING WITH DROWNING AS CAUSE OF DEATH? DUNNO.***COME BACK TO THIS. - WHILE UNPACKING AZIRAPHALE SEES A BUNCH OF UNFAMILIAR BOOKS IN THE STUDY AND IS CURIOUS ABOUT THEM. - AZIRAPHALE TALKS TO ANATHEMA ABOUT THE BOOKS AND THE AUTHOR. LEARNS THAT CROWLEY IS THE AUTHOR, AND THAT HE OWNED AND DIED IN THE HOUSE MYSTERIOUSLY. - AZIRAPHALE READS THE BOOKS, LOVES THEM, FEELS A CONNECTION WITH CROWLEY. - AZIRAPHALE SOMEHOW CONNECTS WITH CROWLEY’S LINGERING SPIRIT IN THE HOUSE (DETAILS TO COME) - THEY START COMMUNICATING. CROWLEY REVEALS THAT HE WAS MURDERED - I WANT THIS TO BE AN EMOTIONAL SCENE, AZIRAPHALE VERY UPSET AND DISTURBED BY WHAT HE’S BEEN TOLD. ALSO AFRAID CAUSE HE’S MADE CONTACT W/ SOMEONE WHO’S VERY DEAD. MAYBE HE EVEN CALLS ANATHEMA AFTER TO REVEAL THE NATURE OF CROWLEY’S DEATH. - NEED SCENES OF AZIRAPHALE GROWING OLD IN THE HOUSE WITH CROWLEY’S GHOST, THEN EVENTUALLY DYING AND ACTUALLY UNITING WITH HIM. SAPPY, EMOTIONAL, THE WORKS. - AZIRAPHALE AND CROWLEY’S SPIRITS LINGER IN THE HOUSE, EVEN AS A NEW COUPLE MOVES IN.

those were my major scenes that i needed to write and that would make up most of my story.

3: flesh out the aforementioned scenes. break these scenes down individually and think about them, picture them like a movie in your head. when aziraphale sees the cottage, what’s happening around him? has he gotten out of the car? what is the weather like, is it a dreamy setting? should the wind be gently rustling the trees and his hair? is he in awe? does he take a moment to take in the exterior of the house. what does the house look like? picture that entire scene from start to finish, then jot down your thoughts. remember, you aren’t actually doing Proper Good Writing out. you’re just getting the ideas down and the draft ideas fleshed out. 4: once i have those scenes fleshed out (always typed in all caps for me lol), i start the actual ‘writing’ process. I drop the all-caps, start using proper grammar, and go into I’m Telling A Story Mode. I usually try to start writing at the beginning, because i tend to visualize my stories as movies that play in my head. i need to mentally see it progress as i write it, like i would do if i were watching a movie or reading a book. but sometimes that doesn’t happen - sometimes beginnings are the hardest part. if you struggle with the beginning, skip to the first most fleshed out scene you have, the one you feel most comfortable with, or whatever scene you feel REALLY ready to write. this writing doesn’t have to be perfect (it definitely won’t be lol). but you’ll start to get a feel for how you want to actually present this story and these scenes once they’re all finalized. you can edit it and make it prettier later, but for now, just get some words on the paper as if it were a story you were ready to tell. 5: once you have your main scenes fleshed out, you need to start making connections between them. stories need depth and background, so you need to be able to go “okay, i have aziraphale loving the house and buying it, then i need him to find the books in the study, how am I going to connect those two scenes?”

you can do this part either as you go along (example: you’ve written your first Major Scene, and you want to progress onto your next scene, so you write the connections first, then once you have the connection scenes done, you can then move on to the next Major Scene from your draft) OR you can get all your major drafted scenes written, and make your connections AFTER those scenes are done. you just gotta see what works for you. 

i prefer the first method, i try to write the major scenes and the connection scenes as i go along so that i have a natural flow. that also allows me to make some changes to a later Major Scene before i actually write it. (example: hm, i was gunna have Aziraphale do XYZ in the next scene, but with this connection, I think having him do ABC in that scene might work better).

if you don’t have a clear-cut idea yet for how to connect your scenes, go back to the all caps ‘drafting’ mode, where you’re just throwing ideas on the page in between, like: ‘AZIRAPHALE HAS JUST MOVED IN AND IS READY TO UNPACK, I NEED HIM TO BRING HIS BOOKS TO THE STUDY TO START UNPACKING THEM AND SHELVING THEM. THAT’S WHEN HE SHOULD NOTICE CROWLEY’S BOOKS THAT HAVE MYSTERIOUSLY APPEARED ON THE SHELVES.’ from there, go back into ‘proper writing’ mode when you’re ready, and flesh out that scene - what is aziraphale doing while he’s unpacking? are his boxes of books already in the study, or do i need him to have a reason to bring them into the study? maybe a mover accidentally placed one in the wrong room. this is your connector that will get you between scenes. 6: once you have all your scenes done in a proper first draft, go back, do re-writes, add new things that you think you might need, take out things that aren’t necessary, check your grammar and spelling, and do your final proofing. (read your story out loud too - it’s the easiest way to catch typos, errors, or weird phrasing)

7: don’t be afraid to write ANYWHERE. many of my ideas for scenes popped up in the middle of a work day, and every time that happens, i text myself. i send myself a text, all caps, with the scene idea, and i don’t open it until i’m ready to write. it helps me keep track of things. i did a lot of writing in notebooks, on post-it notes, wherever really. i even have googledocs installed on my phone so i could access a fic from anywhere if i had a sudden idea. and if i had something new to add to the document, i put it in all caps, so i would know i needed to address it later.

8: act things out! seriously, i’m not kidding. act your scenes out with yourself. especially dialogue scenes. have those dialogues with yourself, think about how you want dialogue to progress, and talk those ideas out in a way that sounds natural to you. that’ll help you write your dialogue later. (the number of times my husband has walked in on me running through some dialogue aloud......... goodness).

9: don’t be afraid of music :) maybe it’s silly, but i make a playlist for every fic i write because i like to listen to music to get me into the correct mood for what i’m writing. it helps me a LOT. maybe it won’t be as helpful for you, but always worth a try.

and that’s really.... the extent of my process. it’s a little messy, i know, and maybe it’s not the best advice. and i just hope that it at least a LITTLE bit of sense... but i hope it will at least be of some help to you! if you’re confused about anything, please don’t hesitate to message me. 

or if you want to chat one-on-one, that’s totally fine too. i 100% don’t mind if you send me a chat message. i’m always happy to help.