#but I'm still super curious on where everyone's priorities are

[dyssonant-skyline]

I'm genuinely curious, feel free to expand on why in reblogs/tags.

[majikkulu]

━━ ❝ masterlist ❞

these are my personal observations and may not resonate with everyone. please take them with a grain of salt, as i'm not a professional astrologer! :))

(i don’t know much about greek gods and goddesses, but i joined a top model contest where i have to dress up as a greek deity. it landed on hecate, and since she represents witchcraft and spirituality, i felt inspired to do an asteroid hecate lmaoooo. i hope yall will like my interpretation ;pp.)

asteroid hekate (100) is a greek goddess who rules over witchcraft, crossroads, and the night. she represents the deep, hidden parts of life, like the mysteries of life and death, and changes that happen in the dark or behind the scenes. think of her as a super-powered flashlight that helps you find your way when you’re lost in a dark forest. hekate helps you tap into your inner wisdom and guides you through tough times or big decisions.

where hekate is in your chart it points to areas where you might face crossroads, big changes, and hidden truths. it’s like having a special ability to understand things that aren't obvious right away. hekate also helps with personal transformation, helping you move from one part of your life to another.

𝖍𝖊𝖐𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖎𝖓 1𝖘𝖙 - they have a really cool, mysterious vibe that makes people curious about them. their intuition is super strong, and they might even have psychic abilities. this gives them a natural wisdom that others find fascinating, especially if they’re into spiritual stuff. while they might be drawn to spiritual practices, fully embracing them could be challenging. they’re very sensitive to their surroundings and trust their instincts. their journey involves listening to their inner voice and following their gut. people feel there’s more to them than meets the eye, and their powerful presence can be very magnetic. however, they might struggle with knowing exactly who they are and what path to take.

𝖍𝖊𝖐𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖎𝖓 2𝖓𝖉 - they’ve got a knack for making smart choices with their money and possessions through their intuition. their financial situation might go through a lot of ups and downs, but these changes help them figure out what’s truly important to them. they might find themselves deciding what to keep and exploring new ways to earn money. they probably value items with special meaning. over time, their priorities might shift, and they’ll rethink what’s worth holding onto. they might be drawn to earning money through spiritual work like astrology or tarot. even though their finances can be a bit unpredictable, they should remember that their true worth comes from their spiritual and intuitive gifts, not just material things.

𝖍𝖊𝖐𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖎𝖓 3𝖗𝖉 - they speak in a way that’s intense and full of insight, often using metaphors and talking about deep topics like psychology or mystical themes. they might have a natural understanding of what others are thinking and feeling. advising their siblings or close relatives might come easily to them. however, they might find it tricky to clearly express their own thoughts and feelings, which can sometimes lead to misunderstandings.

𝖍𝖊𝖐𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖎𝖓 4𝖙𝖍 - they might go through major changes related to their family and home, like moving or shifts in family dynamics. their home could feel like a special, mysterious place that they protect strongly. they might discover deep truths about their family or even uncover secrets. they could be someone others rely on for emotional support, which can be a lot of pressure. they might have inherited spiritual abilities from their family, and these could be a big part of who they are. handling strong emotions and family conflicts might require them to take a step back for some introspection and healing. it’s important for them to set boundaries to take care of themselves while still being there for their loved ones.

𝖍𝖊𝖐𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖎𝖓 5𝖙𝖍 - they’re drawn to exploring spiritual themes through their creativity. creative activities help them express their deep, hidden truths. when they date, they look for strong emotional or spiritual connections and are often attracted to people who share their mystical interests. their intuition makes these connections intense and transformative, helping them understand themselves better. they use creative outlets to connect with their inner self and explore spiritual practices that make them happy. they’re also great with kids, understanding them intuitively and guiding them with wisdom. they might face creative blocks, but these challenges often lead to new insights or breakthroughs.

𝖍𝖊𝖐𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖎𝖓 6𝖙𝖍 - they might be drawn to careers with a spiritual theme, like healing or counseling. their job situation could change a lot, and they’ll likely know intuitively if something is wrong with their health, which might lead them to holistic practices like energy healing or meditation. emotional or spiritual issues might show up as physical symptoms. their daily routine might include spiritual practices like meditation, and they might naturally organize what feels right to them. helping others could be fulfilling, especially when it comes to understanding their personal and emotional struggles. however, this placement might also lead to stress or dissatisfaction, causing them to overthink their path or daily tasks.

𝖍𝖊𝖐𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖎𝖓 7𝖙𝖍 - they form deep, transformative relationships and attract partners who are intense and spiritual. these partners might push them to explore new sides of themselves and their relationship dynamics. they have an intuitive understanding of their partner’s needs and desires. they might be drawn to mysterious partners who reveal hidden parts of themselves or their relationship. some connections could feel significant or even karmic. this placement can also bring challenges related to control and emotional conflicts, similar to having pluto in the 7th house.

𝖍𝖊𝖐𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖎𝖓 8𝖙𝖍 - for them, intimacy can be intense and revealing, bringing up psychological and spiritual truths about themselves and their partners. they might be interested in exploring hidden or taboo aspects of sex. their intuition is strong when it comes to shared finances. they might face fears and psychological issues that lead to personal growth. they could be interested in mystical practices like astrology or tarot. working through past traumas and unresolved issues can bring healing and a sense of renewal. however, they might encounter issues with control or power in their intimate relationships or financial dealings. despite these challenges, they could do really well in business.

𝖍𝖊𝖐𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖎𝖓 9𝖙𝖍 - they might experience changes in their beliefs and how they view life's purpose, often leading them to a more spiritual perspective. they could be drawn to esoteric or occult philosophies and approach learning with their intuition. traveling might bring transformative experiences and new insights. they might be attracted to places with spiritual or mystical significance, prompting deeper reflection. exploring the universe and its mysteries could fascinate them. their deep knowledge and intuitive understanding can make them a great teacher.

𝖍𝖊𝖐𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖎𝖓 10𝖙𝖍 - their career and goals might go through changes, and they could be drawn to roles that involve mystical practices. the public might see them as someone who brings a unique, transformative energy with innovative ideas. their strong intuition can help them make decisions that lead to success. in their work, they might take on a mentoring role. this placement can bring intense or challenging experiences, and they might explore hidden aspects of society.

𝖍𝖊𝖐𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖎𝖓 11𝖙𝖍 - they might experience deep and transformative friendships and interactions. they often attract friends who are intense or spiritual, bringing significant changes into their life. they might be drawn to groups with mystical or esoteric interests. their long-term goals might involve spiritual themes, and they have an intuitive sense of their dreams and aspirations. they could experience intense dynamics within their social circle, like power struggles. they might take on a leadership role in their group, providing guidance and support. their aspirations have a spiritual purpose, leading to a fulfilling journey.

𝖍𝖊𝖐𝖆𝖙𝖊 𝖎𝖓 12𝖙𝖍 - they might go through inner changes and transformations, exploring hidden parts of themselves. this can lead to self-discovery and healing. spending time alone can offer them growth and spiritual insight. they might be pushed to confront and address shadow aspects of themselves, which can be intense but also healing. they may need to work through self-sabotaging tendencies. their path involves deep inner work and exploring hidden realms, so trusting their inner guidance and intuition is key. this placement can bring healing, inner peace, and insights from unknown sources.

[space-blue]

Having digested the first 3 episodes of Arcane 2, I'm ready to say something bold and brave, and I hope I don't get too much hate for it.

Vi is just not a nice person.

In season 1, I feel like I was maybe unfair to the writers by saying that "rushing the romance with an enforcer/1% like Cait" was "flattening" Vi's character. That it was bending her out of shape.

How could a Zaunite as maltreated as Vi so easily turn to someone like Cait?

I was told by shippers it's because Cait is the first to show her kindness in a long time, and I still think that's hogwash. She is fresh out of mega hell prison where enforcers beat her so often they lost track of it. I don't believe any amount of kindness could make you fall for an enforcer within 48h in this context. Not realistically.

But now?

Vi hears Cait dehumanizing Zaunites and doesn't fight back. It takes a few compliments to make her accept an enforcer badge. She's running around gasing the people of the Lanes, making excuses for it, while looking fresh out of a WWII horror movie in that gas mask.

And when the gas mask is off, she's wearing Claggor's goggles... Like, yeesh.

She's clearly blinded by Cait. And that's fine! I used to think it was the flaw of the writers trying to hurry a Caitvi ship along. Now I gotta admit, it looks like Vi just doesn't have strong morals.

She hates enforcers but she'll join them easily. Her wanna-be gf says we use toxic gas that has horrible side effects [cut to horror medical slides] and she says "yeah, it's for the good of the people, sure".

She sees Jinx and accuses her of killing Powder, and says she's tired of making excuses for her.

To WHO, Vi? We don't have you on screen apologizing to anyone for Jinx's actions. I'm sure things were said to Caitlyn, but like, yeesh.

She accuses Jinx of orphaning kids, WHILE WEARING AN ENFORCER UNIFORM, the same worn by the people who orphaned HER.

I give up. The writers knew what they were doing.

A flawed woman who wasn't made a better or more moral one by all the suffering she endured in Stillwater.

Vi is cool, but she's not super loyal, is a bit of a meathead, doesn't have her priorities in orders, leads with her fists and caves easily to her emotions. She's horny for Cait and not very interested in the fate of her community.

Being locked up and beaten didn't make her smarter or kinder. It just made her a better fighter.

It's kind of my bad for assuming that Vi "should be better", logically. If she's written as a human, then she should be flawed and yeah, I guess she fucking is lol

I'm curious to see if she develops some... class consciousness, or some patriotism of some sort, when everyone realises the Noxian offers of protection are a yoke. I'm a lot more curious seeing where she ends now that I've accepted she's cool while also kinda shitty. It's nice that it goes along Cait's spiral into villainy.

[skysometric]

you went on a big asking spree asking about everyone's favorite games, but I'm curious... did you have a favorite album, TV show, or movie this year?

an EXCELLENT question! but my answers my be a little disappointing, because...

Favorite Movie of 2023

i don't... really watch movies? they don't capture my interest or investment like games do. this isn't for lack of trying over the years, i've been exposed to many different genres; i just don't click with the format, i guess. i think of them like the average boomer thinks of games – they're cute little distractions and not much else.

there's definitely a few movies that i like and stand out as formative memories, i just don't go out of my way to watch more. even before the pandemic i would only ever go to the theaters like once a year, and for most of the pandemic i can't say i watched anything even digitally.

...but that did change this year! my partner and i watched both Sonic movies and the Mario movie at home, and of the three i can safely say i enjoyed Sonic 2 the most! i like what it was trying to do with its two stories intertwined, and it gave Sonic and friends a lot of time to shine both in action and characterization. plus the finale was super cool~

i do have a handful of films i want to watch one day... but it's kind of a "whenever i feel like it" basis. the ghibli films are high on the list, as are the monty python films and the truman show. maybe i could revisit ferris bueller's day off now that i'm an adult...?

Favorite TV Show of 2023

...i also don't really watch tv?? am i boring???

i mean, historically, i've gotten more into tv than movies. i like the long continuous plot threads, i like getting to know characters in detail, i like slice of life and comedy and cartoons. i have fond memories of watching sonic x, spongebob, survivor, and mythbusters growing up!

but like, as an adult i've never seen the office, or steven universe, or adventure time... and i'm in no rush to, they're just not really priority for me. i can't even think of other shows i might want to watch. idk!

i tried to watch some anime at one point but that didn't really do me either? i guess i had some fun watching squid girl a few years back... i think i just get understimulated by just watching things, vs playing them.

confusingly, you know what i do get into? livestreams and let's plays. so my weird, cop-out answer of "favorite series" is that i've been really enjoying Chuggaaconroy's let's play of pokemon bw2. his let's plays have gotten me caught up with a series that i wasn't "allowed" to play as a kid... i guess that's part of why watching someone play a game isn't as understimulating to me?

Favorite Album of 2023

you can probably guess where this is going – i don't really listen to music that plays on the radio or gets recommended by spotify. i have good reason for this one though: music with lyrics is overstimulating to me in specific circumstances, like when i'm working (always) or driving (the only time i'd use the radio).

but wait, movies are understimulating, even though there's talking... and music with lyrics is overstimulating, even though there's nothing to watch... argh! i don't even understand myself!!

either way i usually put on video game music, because that helps me focus at work, and (usually) doesn't have lyrics in it. i'm aware there's plenty of great instrumental music outside of just games, but games already have so much variety and quality to their osts – i've rarely ever had to seek out more! my music collection is already big enough!

my favorite album to listen to this year has been the music that plays in the cyberspace stages of Sonic Frontiers. the full game's ost is MASSIVE and incredibly diverse in styles, but the hardcore EDM of the cyberspace stages is extremely my style. and the remixes they added in the dlc are some of the best ones! been listening to the full playlist multiple times a week all year to power through some rough work days, and it still hasn't gotten old 💖

[danceworshipper]

I'm really curious about Alexis and Ominis' fate after they go in hiding in the US, do they end up surviving after being targeted for termination by the government? How do they cope with having minimal contact with their friends?

They do survive! It's a rough transition though. Actually getting to the US was the hardest part - they had to kidnap one niece, steal the the other out of Hogwarts, convince both of the girls that this was a good thing, get fake passports, figure out the money transfer and exactly where the hell they were going to live, and then get onto a muggle ship so that there was no magical trace of them all within about thirteen hours of learning about Lilith's death - but once they were safely on American soil, most of the danger was behind them. Ominis had a discreet contact that he was able to purchase property from under a fake name, no questions asked, so they had a place waiting for them. However, this new house didn't have a proper shelter for a werewolf or any sort of warding, so once arriving those were their first priorities.

Possibly the most terrifying part was that the full moon was due to rise while they were still in the middle of the ocean. They couldn't risk waiting to leave until it was over, so armed with the chains from their old home, Ominis had to do his best to restrain and silence Alexis in their little room while using as little magic as possible and keeping the girls from being too traumatized, plus being unable to see. It didn't go very well, but no one was severely hurt (Ominis did catch a swipe of a claw across the chest and the girls were definitely traumatized), and they weren't caught. A well intentioned woman did ask Alexis if she needed help the next day - all that ruckus last night, and she couldn't help but notice the scars... awkward.

The social aspect sucked for a long time. There were obviously magical ways of communication that would have been super easy to use, but they didn't know if the government or someone like Marvolo would be tracking their friends' movements. And muggle mail wasn't that much safer, plus it would take forever to get even a single letter back, so there was a year long period where Alexis and Ominis were completely cut off from everyone they'd ever known, not knowing if someone was close to finding them or if the people they'd left behind were safe in their absence. They ended up falling into the unhealthy coping mechanism of ✨repression✨ and just doing their best to not think about any of it, instead focusing on making sure the girls integrated as well as they could into their new schools (Ilvermorny and a muggle elementary) after a summer of lying their way into their new community. It was a lucky thing that Vivian and Priscilla could easily pass as Alexis and Ominis' daughters.

The first bit of contact from back home was a letter from Natty, by now an auror who was known to play by her own rules. The letter stated that Alexis was still on a kill list - but a passive one, so no one was actively looking for her - and that the Gaunts had taken up a much more reclusive lifestyle. Communication was now safe, but fake names and code were still recommended. It took another year or so before either Alexis or Ominis felt safe enough to allow their friends to magically transport to come visit, but Alexis's muggle family couldn't be stopped from hopping on a ship the second that her new address was revealed. So while the experience was terrifying and painful overall, it worked out in the end.

Thanks for the ask, Cato!!

[tealfruit]

"what does it mean to peak" is a fair question! there's a lot of factors to consider. my meaning was definitely leaning on everyone defining their OWN meaning of "peak"; in my own case, I think of "which games had the most features that felt like they worked for the player" which for me was gen 6--the beginning of character customization, introduction of fairy types, free movement, super training as a way to simplify and streamline EV-training while still having it be a challenge, pokemon amie, the dexnav in oras, and as far as I know the last generation where the entire Pokedex was available between the 4 games released with no need to import them from other generations.

then, when Sun and Moon came out and threw out the previous generation's gimmicks for, in my opinion, weaker ones (the bean islands just didn't hit for me, and tossing mega evolution in favor of z-moves felt cheap, even though I'd scoffed at mega evolution at first), the games didn't have as much staying power for me despite the plot being arguably better and the introduction of regional forms being REALLY cool. Shield marks the first generation I have actually been able to play a game in that I didn't bother finishing, and I don't think I will even buy scarlet or violet for their performance issues and underwhelming gameplay.

but this is all subjective! it's possible that I've just far outgrown the demographic that the company is taking aim at--my inner child still loves Pokemon Emerald, while kids these days are playing Fortnite and Minecraft and such. it's also possible I've set higher standards for game quality and it is objectively true that the newer games do NOT have the level of quality that the literal largest franchise in the world should be capable of putting out (please take a year off pokemon company and game freak. I'm begging). and it's possible I'm tainted with nostalgia because when I booted up OmegaRuby for the first time I cried actual real tears, harkening back to my many days spent playing Emerald as a child.

anyways all this is to say: video games more than anything are a conglomeration of many features and factors that everybody will have different opinions of. movies have plot, writing, characters, cinematography, acting, etc. and any of that can fall flat with some number of people. video games have all that plus leveling mechanics, movement tech, optimization, control schemes, and a billion other things to consider. what becomes a priority for each person is subjective--maybe you can excuse some clunky writing and plot holes because the game feels good to play, or maybe you can overlook a few glitches or annoying gameplay loops because the story is so damn good.

I know I framed the question as "NOT your favorite", and I stand by that. I haven't played gen 5, which is currently leading by a landslide, so maybe I'd have a different opinion if I played it now about whether it is "peak" pokemon. but even if it was, gen 6 would still be my personal favorite--nearly tied with gen 3, which arguably is ABSOLUTELY not even close to the best pokemon has to offer (Shrek voice "they don't even have the physical/special split.") but still ranks up there for me because I grew up on it and I love it so much. they are 2 different things and still both subjective. the reason I made this 2-part poll is because I'm curious about what people's opinions are relative to what games they've played, because I think that probably has a big impact on it. the very fact that gens 1-3 got any votes I think is proof of that lol. that's all

PART 2 OF POLL

please see part 1 of the poll if you haven't voted on that

[bamboo-woods]

Could you translate the Maizono/Kotoko conversation? I'm curious about that one.

Maizono&Kotoko Close Friends Interaction

Maizono: Utsugi-san, it's been a while. Do you, remember me?

Maizono: We co-starred in a variety show once.

Kotoko: Of course, I know you. Who doesn't know you?

Kotoko: But... I don't know anything about co-starring. It's a story from buried past.

Maizono: Ah... I'm sorry. It was something you did not want to touch.

Kotoko: I retired months ago. It's a distant past.

Kotoko: Even so, they call me "Super Elementary School Level Arts Festival Period", bringing me to places like this...

Kotoko: If it wasn't for Monaka-chan, I would be complaining furiously.

Maizono: For me too, when I was your age, months seemed like a very long time but...

Maizono: When you grow up, your standards change gradually.

Maizono: I guess that's why people around Utsugi-san can't keep up with Utsugi-san's changes.

Kotoko: Really, it's bothersome! I'm a normal girl now!

Maizono: For Utsugi-san... that is the happiness.

Kotoko: In the first place, I didn't even want to become popular.

Kotoko: Since you're still in that business... you might never understand.

Maizono: ... yes. For me, it's a dream I barely managed to achieve.

Maizono: That's why, I'm not criticizing or thinking weird of your choice.

Maizono: If Utsugi-san is smiling, then that is the first priority.

Maizono's 'Possibilities for Talent' Event

In order to find a new possibility in our talents, what should we do?

Maizono: (New possibility... going overseas, or trying different areas... If I could go easy, there are many things I could choose, but it's not that kind of story. Possibilities... me from now on... a future, as an idol?)

- Let's think about when I grow up. (Leon) - Let's think about idol business in general. (Harukawa) -> Let's think about continuing this for life. (Kotoko)

Maizono: Utsugi-san, don't you plan on going back to entertainment business?

Kotoko: No-pe! I'm going back to being a normal girl!

Maizono: Is that so... I see.

Maizono: We can't say all the successful people wanted it.

Maizono: Not everyone who wants to be successful, can be successfull... and they can't keep on being successful too.

Kotoko: For me, I don't understand the feeling of liking that business where it's full of hideous adults.

Kotoko: Since you're really cute, I think you might know this already...

Kotoko: Does being cute, come with great responsibility?

Kotoko: If you are surrounded by hideous adults, then won't the day when you want to butcher everyone come?

Maizono: Certainly, it's not a world where you can chase only pretty dreams but...

Maizono: I believe that, the beauty of the dream that idols had shown me when I was young, is real.

Maizono: I, want to keep on living in the world I had been dreaming of.

Kotoko: It'd be good if only people wishing for it like you saw the hell but,

Kotoko: Well, that's that! I want to play with Monaka-chan!

[Intent to keep on being an idol, oncoming good lucks, the determination to continue... I thought about many things...]

-------------

Kotoko’s been going through hell in this world too...

[fading-mentally]

Not super happy with this, but I think that's mostly because frying pans are more difficult to draw than they seem. Also, that is a knife tied to the frying pan. I wanted to find a middle ground between his Soul Slugger Doom Bat and the iconic weapon of choice from the movie.

Anyway, here's Giovanni as Eugene! Some of the plot starts diverging more from the movie plotline when it gets to Giovanni and the other criminals, mostly because Giovanni is very different from Eugene. He may have done some stuff to warrant being a wanted criminal, but he's certainly not the highest priority because he's not a very good criminal. In the au he never worked with the equivalent of the Stabbington brothers (which I think will be Indus and Ramsey) because, again, not a very good criminal and that would have been a much higher level job.

As far as his relationship with the Snuggly Duckling crew goes, all of them will pretty much be his Banzai Blasters. So Giovanni would probably either instigate the 'I've Got a Dream' song or join in if someone else instigates it, because he's very supportive of his boys and would absolutely encourage them to follow their dreams. Molly would either be resigned in a 'I guess this is my life now' kind of way, or she'd react more like Eugene and be like 'why's everyone singing?' The song would probably still be about everyone else's dreams, but there would be a bigger focus on encouraging Molly to find her own dream to follow and take more charge in her life, basically some of the stuff Molly and Giovanni talk about in the museum arc, but in song format. This is also where she'd be inducted into the Banzai Blasters, I don't know if she would have gained her nickname yet though.

Goodness, this was supposed to be about Giovanni but I ended up with a whole paragraph about one scene. I've been sitting on some of this for a while though, so I'm glad I got it out there.

I'm also open to questions about the au if anybody is curious about something, it might help me come up with ideas.

[partywithponies]

hi! i've only ever seen the bbc version of father brown and i've never read the books (i know, i'm so sorry), but i'm super curious about the different versions of father brown and you seem like an expert on each adaptation, so i was wondering if you'd be willing to give me a rundown of sorts on each version/series? i know it's a lot to ask and i may be opening the floodgates here, but there's not a ton of info online elsewhere and i'd love to learn more! thanks either way. ciao!

OH BOY YOU’VE COME TO THE RIGHT PLACE ANON

OKAY SO

As briefly as possible:

The books:

Proof people who complain about the BBC show being “too political” don’t actually know the books at all

Father Brown straight up calls capitalism “evil” and “heresy”

Chesterton says that millionaires dying isn’t a tragedy

Inspector Valentin betrayed us and broke my heart, ACAB I guess

Since every police officer he befriends lets him down in some way, Father Brown’s only real friend is Flambeau, who he goes absolutely everywhere with. They only go on holiday with each other. They’ve been all over the world with each other. I love they

Book Father Brown pretty much never does his goddamn job. We literally never in all the books see him giving mass or taking confession. The closest we get is when he gives an impromptu sermon after seemingly coming back from the dead, where he literally only says "You silly, silly people. God bless you all and give you more sense." then runs away to send a telegram. Useless priest. I love him. 

Book Flambeau is. Incredible. Amazing. Iconic. None of the adaptations have been able to fully capture book Flambeau’s true energy, for he is a walking contradiction who contains multitudes. If all the onscreen Flambeaus fused into one being, THEN you’d have something vaguely resembling book Flambeau.

Book Flambeau is MASSIVE. He’s at least 6′4, he’s broad shouldered, has huge hands, and his super buff. He can just. Pick people up and throw them. He can knock people unconscious with one punch. He fills doorways when he stands in them. He terrifies most people just by drawing himself up to his full height. He also has a very short temper and a very short patience. 

He’s very agile and athletic and can move silently, despite his size. He’s also a master of disguise, somehow. (Explain, Chesterton. Explain. Is everyone in this universe apart from Father Brown, Flambeau, and arguably Valentin massively stupid? Actually don’t answer that I’ve read these books)

Book Flambeau has a habit of flinging people full-bodily down flights of stairs when they anger him or threaten him or Father Brown. Book Flambeau also carries a walking cane with him literally everywhere that has a sword concealed in the handle, plus book Flambeau insists on taking pistols on holiday with him, even when he was just going for a peaceful fishing holiday in the Norfolk Broads. King. 

(Which all makes it so iconic that Father Brown, described as tiny and meek and sensitive, saw this man when he was still a hardened criminal on top of all this and said “THIS ONE I LIKE THIS ONE. I JUST THINK HE’S NEAT” and went off on a jolly through London with him.)

Flambeau’s past is extremely mysterious. We no nothing about his family or his childhood or where he’s from or why he turned to crime. We know he used to be a soldier, and a part of him misses it. We know he used to fight duels semi-regularly, and liked them to be fought the very next morning after they were organised. We know he always used to make sure to visit the dentist on time, even when he was a hardened criminal. (King of good teeth.)  We know he was in a gang at some point. We know he was a student at some point. We don’t know what he studied, but we know he knew Leonard Quinton in “wild student days in Paris”  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). This is literally all we know about his past before he met Father Brown. The man is a riddle wrapped in an enigma. (That’s why Flambeau is so big. He’s full of secrets)

(Fun fact: in the book universe Flambeau is famous and popular in America, so you could say that in universe Flambeau is America’s Favourite Fighting Frenchman.)

Flambeau also loves cats and children, believes in fairies, likes pointing out rocks that look like dragons, and likes giggling and mucking about on the beach with Father Brown.  A baby.

One time Father Brown called Flambeau “full of good and pure thoughts”, but I don’t think that’s quite true, Father. I think Father Brown just has endless faith in Flambeau.

Another thing I think is really neat is that it would’ve been so easy to have Father Brown be the genius and Flambeau his dumb muscle sidekick but that’s not the case at all! They’re both geniuses and they’re both each other’s sidekick, and in fact it’s Flambeau who’s the famous professional private detective, Father Brown is just an amateur. Father Brown is often defined by his connection to Flambeau rather than vice versa, both in the text (the text will frequently refer to them as something along the lines of “Flambeau and his friend the priest”, and on two separate occasions a long list of Flambeau’s possessions is ended with “and a priest”), and in universe (Father Brown himself is massively famous in America in universe largely because of “his long connection to Flambeau). I don’t know I just think it’s neat. 

One time a man threatened Father Brown with a gun and Flambeau just beat him unconscious and then Father Brown and Flambeau just drove away and left him unconscious on the path. It was awesome.

(I’m sorry I rambled about Flambeau for so many words I just. Really really like Flambeau you guys. Father Brown and Flambeau are like two separate crime drama character tropes, the hard boiled cynical P.I. and the cosy eccentric amateur detective, but together as a double act, and I just think that’s really cool.)

Father Brown himself is if anything even more mysterious. He’s just “Father J. Brown, formerly of Cobhole in Essex, currently London”, and he’s “Flambeau’s friend”, and that’s all. That’s all he needs to be.

I also really really love Father Brown himself. I love that he’s allowed to be cheerful and optimistic and childish without any of this making him less clever, and in fact he’s shown time and time again to be cleverer than grumpy cynics who are scornful of childish things. Like, the whole giggling childlike thing isn’t even some kind of act, he’s a genius who understands true human nature, and he also really really likes puppet shows and building sandcastles who telling fairy stories, he really does get a “childish pleasure” from seeing Flambeau swing his sword-stick, and he really does have “strong personal interest in tomfoolery”. I love him.

I must share my favourite book quote about Father Brown himself: “But neither of them is very like the real Father Brown, who is not broken at all; but goes stumping with his stout umbrella through life, liking most of the people in it; accepting the world as his companion, but never as his judge.” uwu uwu uwu I’m cry.

Chesterton just subverts all the expectations character wise, the cheerful bumbling priest is a genius, the violent criminal is a true hero, the noble police officer is a corrupt self-serving murderer. It’s great. We stan. 10000000/10

(I’m not very good at being brief, am I?)

Father Brown, Detective (1934):

The first movie! It’s completely ridiculous. I love it a lot.

It was released just at the start of Hays Code, which, among other things, stated that crime and immorality should not be glorified or glamourised, and all crime and immorality must be seen to be punished by the end of the film. In practice in the case of this film, this means two things:

Paul Lukas!Flambeau is the only Flambeau to actually go to prison (and stay there).

He’s by far the Flambeau who deserves it the least. Lukas!Flambeau never hurt a soul. He just wanted to be loved. #FreeMyBoyHercule

Okay but in all seriousness. There’s a reason I call Paul Lukas!Flambeau “Himbo Flambeau”. Where other Flambeaus are violent or dangerous or geniuses, Lukas!Flambeau is just a big dumb idiot who respects women and has a great sense of humour and writes all his letters in the third person like Elmo for some reason. I would die for him.

At one point Flambeau in disguise is talking to the police, and when the police criticise Flambeau, disguised Flambeau says “Oh but I assure! I have read many things about this Flambeau! He is a fearless, handsome fellow!” The absolute idiot. I adore him with my whole heart.

The film is set in London, like the books, but an idealised Hollywood version of London, i.e., almost entirely unlike London.

Walter Connolly!Father Brown is also entirely lacking in braincells. Look at these two idiot men:

I love them.

Oh oh! And the most important thing, the thing that carries over into most other adaptations? NEW ORIGINAL CHARACTERS!!

This movie invents a few characters that weren’t in the books, but the most important ones are Mrs Boggs:

She doesn’t really add much to the plot but she’s funny and I love her so I’ll forgive it. 

She’s Father Brown’s housekeeper, she’s basically just the fussing maternal female character archetype who fusses around in the background, but she does it well and plays it with charm so I’ll allow it.

(Honestly this whole film is just. Not *technically* good or original, but just so charming and with so much heart that I unironically adore it.)

She tries to make Father Brown drink his milk because it’s good for him even though he doesn’t like it, and keeps checking back in on him to make sure he’s drunk it, it’s literally like a mother and her small child.

She objects to policemen in the presbytery because of their “big muddy boots on the carpet” but is fine with just letting Flambeau in whenever despite the prevailing rumour in London being that Flambeau killed a man. We stan a queen of having priorities. 

When Inspector Valentine summons Father Brown to the station, Mrs Boggs pops up in the background, assumes Father Brown’s being arrested, and says “Oh dear, I knew it!” and it makes me giggle like an idiot every time.

The other, more important original character invented for this movie is my girl Evelyn Fischer:

I love her, I would die for her, she’s flawless.

She’s basically your typical bored and rebellious young aristocrat, but she has a chaotic streak that I adore.

She sneaks out of her family’s mansion to go to a seedy underground club/illegal gambling ring in Soho (I mean I assume it’s Soho, a seedy part of London in that general vicinity, at least. I’m not about to get bogged down trying to understand the geography of London according to Hollywood), flirts with a bunch of strangers for fun, then when the police raid the place and everyone else is panicking she stands stock still, cheerfully says “Oh goody, I shall probably get my name in the papers!” and has to be physically dragged out of the building by Flambeau.

Later on Flambeau breaks into her bedroom in the middle of the night and she’s just very calmly like “What are you doing?”, and even when she finds out it’s Flambeau, a man widely believed to be dangerous and violent, instead of being scared, she calls him an idiot right to his face.

She forms the third part of the main trio of the movie with Father Brown and Flambeau (RIP to Valentine, demoted to tertiary character in a loose adaptation of the one (1) story where he was the main character lol) and together the three of them share a single braincell and have to take turns with it, while Mrs Boggs fusses in the background at the trio’s increasingly bonkers decisions. 

The movie ends with Father Brown and Evelyn sharing an emotional farewell with Flambeau through the window of a police car and promising to look after each other until Flambeau’s released, wow poly rights.

The Adventures of Father Brown (1945):

The adaptation there’s the least amount of information about, but I’ve done my best to find everything I can find on it.

An American radio show made towards the end of wartime, it’s a bit of an odd one, and believe me Father Brown adaptations have gone some odd places.

Only two episodes survive, or at least if more do survive then whoever has them is being very selfish and hoarding them to themselves because only two episodes are publicly available anywhere, and the audio quality of those is a bit dodge. (Though that is to be expected, they do appear to be home recordings, from 1945. Honestly we should be grateful to even have two full episodes.)

If the actors I’ve found are the right people, this show featured by far the youngest Father Brown and Flambeau, at the start of the show the actor playing Father Brown was only 36 and the actor playing Flambeau was only 27. They’re BABIES. (Honestly I’d like to see more age variation in Father Brown adaptations, as I have extensively rambled about before, the characters have literally no canon ages in the books, I think people ought to be a little more imaginative instead of always building on the adaptations that came before, even if it is really cool to see traces of all the previous adaptations in each new one that comes along. It’s something I haven’t noticed as much in adaptations of other golden age detective novels, but the Father Brown adaptations do seem to be stuck in some kind of game of “yes, AND” with each other. I would REALLY like to see an adaptation where Flambeau is older than Father Brown though, it's just something we've never had before despite there being literally nothing in the books to suggest this can't be the case, and I just think it'd be neat.)

This show is really really painfully American, in a real old fashioned "golly gee whizz mister" kind of way, to the point it almost feels like a parody, and I honestly find it kind of endearing.

Even Flambeau frequently slips into a very American accent to the point that my affectionate nickname for him is "The All-American Flambeau", and it's great. He's great.

Honestly I could accept the accents and the slang, for some reason the only thing that really threw me was Father Brown referring to money in cents and nickels.

Needless to say, this adaptation is not set in London. It is instead set in Generic Unspecified Smalltown USA. It's fine. This is fine. I already have so many films and shows set in London, I can swallow my London pride and let America have this.

It's hard to get a real grasp on characters from just two episodes, but I like this Father Brown and Flambeau, even if they are a little overly serious, and even if Flambeau doesn't really do much. He may be a bit serious and a bit useless but All-American Flambeau stays up late anxiously waiting for Father Brown to get home safely and it's very sweet. What a good boy.

All-American Flambeau also carries handcuffs around with him for some reason? But no weapons? Why is All-American Flambeau one of the few Flambeaus not to have a gun? Oh well, he's still sweet.

The 1945 radio show also gives us some original characters, but they're very much side characters and not part of the main plot and it's very hard to get a good grasp on a character from just a few minutes of audio from just two episodes but here's what I could gather:

Nora is another fussing housekeeper! She seems younger and less maternal than Mrs Boggs, but I don't know if that's just because the whole cast was on the younger side. (Could the radio station not find anyone over the age of 40? Were they in short supply in 1945 or something? Ah well.) She seems dedicated to helping Father Brown get some peace and quiet that he never goddamn gets because someone always goes and gets themselves murdered. In both surviving episodes a knock at the door disturbs Father Brown’s rest, Nora opens it professionally, sees it's Flambeau, and immediately drops the professionalism and is immediately like "oh it's only you", so I can only assume every episode started this way. I do hope so.

Father Peter is a junior priest who answers to Father Brown and takes over his duties on his days off. He's implied by the dialogue to be considerably younger than Father Brown, Nora, and Flambeau, but if their actors are anything to go by then they're not that old themselves, and though Father Brown seems to talk to Father Peter like he's a literal child, he is still a priest so I very much doubt that's the case. He seems sweet and harmless, but he's only in one of the surviving episodes and only in that towards the end and mentioned briefly at the start, so it's hard to judge completely. It's highly unlikely that the reason he's not even mentioned in the later surviving episode is because he turned out to secretly be an evil murderer, but, this being a Father Brown adaptation, not entirely unfounded. (But no, he's probably just a sweet boy who exists to have exposition delivered to him.)

Father Brown/The Detective (1954):

The Alec Guinness movie! The one haters of any of the other adaptations complain that adaptation isn't more like, but in my humble opinion, actually the worst adaptation.

Like, I don't hate it! The cast is mostly stellar actors and if I just saw it as a movie on its own, it'd probably be fine. But as a Father Brown adaptation watched in context of the books and the other adaptations, it has a few issues imo.

Most glaringly it has Tone Issues. This film cannot decide if it's a comedy or not. The original posters certainly marketed it as one (see above) and half the cast are noted comic actors who were famous at the time for comedy, goddamn SID JAMES is in it, but the entire third act is played painfully straight, half the cast is mugging for the camera and trying way too hard to be funny while the other cast is giving extremely serious and subtle performances, like. I have no problem with a Father Brown adaptation being played for laughs, and I have no problem with a Father Brown adaptation being played for drama, both can work beautifully, but just PICK ONE, PLEASE

All of my other gripes with the film are very petty and nitpicky, this film calls Father Brown and Flambeau "Ignatius Brown" and "Gustav Flambeau" even though Father Brown has the canon first initial "J" and Flambeau has the canon first name "Hercule", and I hate it a lot. "Ignatius and Gustav" is the second worst thing any Father Brown adaptation has ever done to me.

My other petty nitpick with the movie is that it makes Flambeau literal nobility. The man is a duke. In my opinion Flambeau should always either have a completely mysterious past or be a nobody who came from nothing, someone who grew up with land and title and many servants and a family coat of arms, living in a whole entire castle with his family name and coat of arms engraved into the side of it, growing up and stealing from people, is a whole lot less sympathetic in my opinion. Like to be fair his parents are dead which is sad I guess and his castle has seen better days, but dude. You still own a castle. People who live in castles do not get to lecture other people about materialism.

THAT SAID, Peter Finch is still the best thing about the movie. I love all Flambeaus dearly, even the ones that are little bitches. He’s a bit of an emo “oh woe is me” sadboy, but he’s very charming, and actually good at disguises and being undercover, get dunked on Lukas!Flambeau.

Guinness!Brown likes to feed ducks and Flambeau calls him “the angel with the flaming umbrella”, which makes my inner Good Omens fan who loves finding parallels between Aziraphale & Crowley and Father Brown & Flambeau go 👀

There is one really good scene, in the Paris Catacombs. And by “good” I mean “really really bafflingly gay”:

I truly, truly do not understand how this scene was written, directed, acted, filmed, and edited without ANYONE saying “hey lads does this seem a bit gay to you?”

Father Brown, literally lying on top of Flambeau and pinning him to the ground, whispering: “I would like to set you free.” Flambeau, softly, gently smiling while his face is literal inches away from Father Brown, who is still pinning him to the ground: “Ah, now I begin to understand what you are.”

What the fuck, you guys. What the entire fuck. This scene keeps me up at night.

ANYWAY

This film is also not set in London. It is instead mostly set in a rural English village, and partially in Paris and partially in rural France. Paris is fun but I miss London.

This film also has some original characters. I should probably talk about them. 

This is Lady Warren:

She’s Father Brown’s friend, and she’s a Lady, and that’s all I can really tell you.

She’s very well-mannered and dignified and sophisticated.

She gives me the vibe that she exists solely because the writers decided they needed a female character but then remembered at the last minute they had no idea how to write women, so as a result she is almost entirely irrelevant to the plot. I don’t want to say I don’t like her, because she’s done nothing wrong and it’s not her fault, but like. Why is she here? Poor thing, she deserved to be plot-relevant, really.

She lives in a big mansion and owns some very nice things, and she gets annoyed when she invites Father Brown to lunch but he just stares blankly into space thinking about Flambeau the whole time. (Mood honestly FB. Me too.) 

She flirts a bit with Flambeau in one very pointless scene that came the hell out of nowhere, went nowhere, and was never mentioned again. It was like the writers realised how gay the previous Flambeau scene was and suddenly tried to convince me this man is a hetero. Nice try, writers. You can’t fool me that easily.

The other main original character is Bert:

Alright, own up, whose bright idea was it to put Sid James in a Father Brown movie?

Bert is a smalltime criminal who’s a friend of Father Brown, who Father Brown protects from the police, but tries to convince to get on the straight and narrow by getting him as a job as Lady Warren’s chauffer. 

This is would be fine, were it not for the fact he’s played by Sid James, who only knows how to play Sid James, and is just Sid Jamesing it up in every scene. I don’t have anything against Sid James. I like my fair share of Carry On films. But Sid James does not belong in Father Brown and I want to fight whoever decided he did.

Father Brown (1974):

LADS LADS LADS! It’s time for the first TV show, and it’s time for my favourite boys:

Oh! OH! How I love Kenneth More!Brown and Dennis Burgess!Flambeau. They’re just. So cute. My two special boys.

Not only that, but LADS! We’re finally back in London!

A gritty, dirty, London in the 1930s no less, with cool London buses and political unrest and grimy pubs and the constant threat of world war. Alexa this is so cool play London Calling.

In one episode Flambeau gets verbally abused by an anti-immigration right-wing zealot. :( My poor boy. :( 

(But it’s okay, shortly after Father Brown witnesses this, the racist shows up dead in exactly the place Father Brown earlier said would be a good place to commit a murder. Now I’m not accusing Father Brown of murder, BUT)

This show made the bold but valid decision to skip Flambeau’s redemption arc and start the show when Flambeau is already a seasoned and respected private detective who’s lived in London and been Father Brown’s closest friend for many years. As a result this Father Brown and Flambeau are ridiculously domestic with each other. Look at this peak Old Married Couple energy:

Oh! I just love them.

I would love to know how Burgess!Flambeau’s redemption went down though, because Burgess!Flambeau is BY FAR the least repentant of all the reformed Flambeaus. He proudly boasts about his crimes, he still believes he “deserved to succeed”, he still proudly talks about how “daring and outrageous” he was, which begs the question of why did he stop at all? Literally the only explanation I can think of is that he’s literally only doing this for Father Brown’s sake, which. uwu

Oh GOD I love Burgess!Flambeau. Obviously I love all Flambeaus a lot, and choosing a favourite feels like choosing a favourite child, but let’s just say: if the Flambeaus WERE my children, Burgess!Flambeau would be quite spoilt. My ~ Daring And Outrageous ~ boy.

More!Brown and Burgess!Flambeau are both really really socially awkward, uncomfortable in crowds, and nervously say “oh dear” a lot. They really are ridiculously cute.

They also only giggle and joke and act silly when they’re together, when they’re apart they’re both sort of sad and quiet and withdrawn. (This makes episodes Flambeau isn’t in a bit harder to watch because Father Brown is just kind of lost and lonely without his emotional support Frenchman, with three notable exceptions: that time Father Brown infodumped about the mating habits of whales at the Father Superior for a solid minute, that time Father Brown met a dog and reacted with unrestrained delight, and that time someone mentioned former criminals in passing and Father Brown’s whole face lit up and he started gushing about how Flambeau was living in London now and doing very well as a private detective, completely unprompted.)

This show also brought back book!Brown and Flambeau’s habit of always going on holiday together! Wonderful! We love to see it!

This show is also the first time in the entire Father Brown franchise where gay people are overtly acknowledged to exist! And Father Brown is non-judgemental! A roman catholic priest written in the 1970s and living in the 1930s who canonically isn’t homophobic! I have no choice but to stan forever!

You remember what I said about liking to point out Good Omens parallels? WELL

Kenneth More!Father Brown and Dennis Burgess!Flambeau both live in London

Burgess!Flambeau lives in a brightly lit, pale walled, airy and spacious, modern (for the time) London apartment, while More!Brown prefers gothic architecture and lives in an old, grey, cramped, stone building absolutely full floor to ceiling with books

They go out for intimate candlelit dinners for two at very fancy London restaurants 

Desperate people come to Flambeau because he “knows the game on both sides of the fence”

Father Brown responds with a quiet and miserable “oh dear” when asked to actually do his job instead of just watching plays and drinking wine

Father Brown calls Flambeau “my dear” at times and it personally kills me

I mean. I’m just saying.  👀

Now, isn’t there a third important character in the books? 

Oh yes of course:

HIM! THE BASTARD MAN! INSPECTOR VALENTIN HIMSELF!

(Nobody understands him! IT’S NOT! EVIL!)

This show is the literally only adaptation to include the Valentin betrayal and I’m not gonna lie. It’s a very difficult episode to sit through, it’s far darker and grimmer and more depressing than you would ever expect from Father Brown, but my god it’s done so well. Especially considering the teeny tiny budget they clearly had, only four sets are used the entire episode and the whole thing takes place inside Valentin’s house, but even that adds a certain claustrophobic atmosphere and just. It’s done so well.

I think the entire budget went on gore effects because the decapitated heads in this episode are disturbingly realistic for the time the show was made and genuinely grim to look at. Not to mention the intense downer ending.  Not to mention this was THE FINAL EPISODE OF THE SHOW

THE INTENSE DOWNER ENDING OF THIS EPISODE IS HOW THE WHOLE SHOW ENDED

God it hurts so much but I lowkey love it. 

Father Brown Stories (1984):

The second radio series, and the first BBC adaptation! 

Thrilling times for fans of actors being the right nationality for their characters, because after previously being played by a Hungarian, an American, an Englishman, and a Welshman, Flambeau is finally being played by a Frenchman, Olivier Pierre!

Father Brown himself is played by Andrew Sachs, Manuel himself. 

Not gonna lie. It’s kind of hard to figure out how to explain the radio show.

We’re? Maybe back in London? Honestly it’s really unclear.

Pierre!Flambeau is kind of adorable. He’s described as looking like book!Flambeau physically, huge and buff and terrifying, but he has literally none of the temper or predisposition to violence. 

Pierre!Flambeau doesn’t speak very good English at all, and oftentimes will react with “...What?” when he hears a strange English idiom or turn of phrase.

One time he says “Perhaps we should.. push on? SEE HOW I AM MASTERING YOUR ENGLISH IDIOMS” and it’s the cutest thing that’s ever happened.

To try and get better at understanding both the English language and the English people, Flambeau starts obsessively reading Alice in Wonderland and Through The Looking Glass, massive giant adorable boy.

One time Father Brown gets complimented of being academically minded and well read, and then asked if Flambeau is also a keen reader, and when Flambeau tries to say no, Father Brown interrupts and proudly and earnestly says “Oh yes! Monsieur Flambeau is one of our top Lewis Carroll scholars!”, it’s honestly adorable.

This adaptation finally uses “John” as Father Brown’s first name, as it should always have been! I love it!

This series said FUCK Father Brown having a mysterious past and no former friends or relatives! Now he has siblings, and friends who knew him before he was a priest who still call him “John”!

Father Brown himself speaks in a very sweet and soft and wavering way that makes my heart melt.

Sadly and unfortunately, I have to acknowledge the final episode of the show, which is the top worst thing any Father Brown adaptation has ever done to me.

It’s. It’s a crossover. With Sherlock Holmes. Actual goddamn Sherlock Holmes is in it. I hate it. I hate it so much. “Elementary, my dear Flambeau” shut the hell up, if this Flambeau won’t fling you down a flight of stairs then I will.

I deliberately avoided all Holmes-related media for THREE YEARS only for the awful man to spring up on me in Father Brown?? How could you do this to me???

I’m going to yeet myself into the sun, bye everyone.

(On the plus side, the Sherlock Holmes episode does have one of Father Brown’s parishioners recognise Flambeau as “a close friend of Father Brown and a frequent visitor to his room”  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°), so that’s nice I suppose. I’ll still never forgive the writers of this show for putting me through this.)

Father Brown (2013):

YOU ARE HERE.

I kind of see the current TV series as a culmination of all the adaptations that’ve come before? I can definitely see echoes of all of them in it.

And it’s great! I really really love it. I love it a lot. 

I think about it daily.

My one and only complaint I would have is that Flambeau isn’t in it enough. Not just because he’s my favourite, though I’d obviously not be fooling anyone who’s read all this if I said he isn’t.

And it’s not that I don’t love the show as it is, and find the one Flambeau episode a series always something really special, so I don’t know what I’d have the writers do, exactly. 

But it’s just. In literally every other version of Father Brown, Flambeau is the second most important character and the second main protagonist, and to have him in this show so little that some fans or reviewers call him a “minor character” and others call him a “recurring villain”, though I myself don’t see him either of those ways of course because he’s still Flambeau, it’s just kinda sad and painful, y’know?

I don’t know. Maybe I’m just being silly.

Hopefully he’s a regular in at least the final season of the show. If I don’t get my favourite partners in crime solving I’m rioting. 

Anyway that’s my “””brief””” rundown on all the main versions of Father Brown!! I hope you liked it!!

[therenlover]

Can I ask what are you working on now? I know you made a similar list back then but I'm curious with the new requests and stuff

Totally! Priorities are weird and creativity works in odd ways, but this is what I’m trying to get out next.

I’m currently (as in as we speak lol) working on the opening for In Fleeting Touches & Airy Sighs. It’s for a request that wanted angst and smut surrounding Zemo having to leave behind his wife in a safehouse and not come home often because he’s on the run. Overall it’s gonna be funny, heartfelt, and is one of the projects I’m looking forward to. 

Next comes Late Night Jabs! It’s a special Warren Lipka x Reader fic for my lovely mutual so it got to skip the line because they really need some more Warren Lipka as does the world. 

I’m trying to alternate between Zemo and non-Zemo where I can so everyone who followed me for other stuff still gets their content lol. Then will come The Breakout Post Breakup which is a Zemo x Reader fic where the reader helps break Zemo out of prison and it’s awkward because Bucky is her ex and gets super jealous of Zemo. This will also include a request I got to have a superpowered reader saving Zemo’s ass as he fawns over her because he loves a powerful woman lol.

Then comes Dress Code: Casual, a modern AU Hux x Reader fic about getting him to loosen up. After that at some point will be Faster Than The Speed of Light (Duller Than A Bag of Hammers) which is a requested Muslim reader x Pietro Maximoff meet cute fic. 

I’m not sure which Zemo fic will come after that, but here’s a list of all the requests I have currently plotted. 

Fast Times In Lithuania - A sequel to One Last Night In Madripoor where the reader and Zemo have made it out of Madripoor and they expand a bit on their relationship. Lots of filthy fun.

Your Knight In Shining Armor - A sugar daddy Zemo fic where he gets super jealous of other people flirting with a gender-neutral reader so he gets  protective 

Whatever She Wants - The gender-neutral reader gets sick and Zemo uses his massive wealth to get them whatever they want as they recover, literally

Free Of Subtleties - A requested autistic reader fic. While working with Sam and Bucky Zemo gets introduced to one of their friends. She pines after him and he pines in return, and they kinda fall for eachother, but she struggles to intitiate the relationship because she’s unsure if Zemo’s social cues mean he actually likes her, especially since he’s a known manipulator.

Side Effects - The reader gets injected with an even more new version of the super soldier serum against her will and is rescued from the doctor before the shipping container can explode. The chaos trio takes care of her as she adjusts to it and Zemo, as he falls for her, realizes that maybe he had the wrong outlook on supersoldiers.

Those are just the ones I have written on my wall, which I havent updated in a hot second, but expect that to be the next couple weeks probably lol

[dogsliampaynedoesntinstagram]

It’s interesting how much vinyl sales have started to matter in regards to the charts. I’m guessing that now that concert ticket bundling is no longer an option and vinyl sales are only counted when shipped, the 1D members will also try to schedule their upcoming albums so that album vinyls are also available upon release date rather than six months down the line in order to boost first week sales.

https://variety.com/2021/music/news/adele-vinyl-record-pressing-plant-lp-shortages-1235103951/

Thanks anon - that's a great article, which brings up a lot of issues.

I think it's going to be really interesting to watch what charts do over the next few months, now that artists can neither merch nor ticket bundle (the impact of all the changes were hidden by the general weirdness of the pandemic and now is when things will become clearer).

And as the article suggests a huge part of it will be turning formats into commodities in themselves, instead of ways to deliver music. So I expect lots of coloured vinyl and coloured tapes to be produced.

The implications for 1D members are interesting. I think charts are important enough to all of them that they'll do what they can to jack them (although there's always a question of resources and priorities). And for anyone releasing an album next year, that means not releasing until six months after you're finished. It definitely pushes back expected release dates.

I wouldn't be surprised if Niall and Louis are aiming to finish so they try and release third quarter next year. Niall has a lot more flexibility than Louis, who still has to tour (my imagined good schedule for Louis would be promoting singles in early Summer and then using the Italian dates in September as a springboard to release the album off).

But it does make the rumours that Harry's going to release his album in 60 to 90 days quite interesting (to do this he would have had to finish HS3 between finishing filming MP and starting touring).

So I've always assumed that he'll finish his tour and then he'll release HS3 and sell another one. It's what makes him the most money and tours can be scheduled around various movies he has to promote and/or film. Releasing HS3 and then doing the rest of the Love on Tour dates seems to me to be leaving money on the table.

So why would he release now? One option would be that he feels like he's been invisible too long and he has to release music to maintain his relevance. This seems really unlikely to me - given all the rest of the attention he's got. It's possible that there's some advantage to him to fulfilling his contract with Sony faster, but I'm not particularly convinced.

I did wonder if he was worried about the charts. He used a lot of bundling to get his number ones last time and so it will look like he's selling less, whatever happens. First quarter is easier to chart than later in the year. But Fine Line streamed really well - and everyone is in that position (Ed Sheeran's numbers in the US for = are well down). It seems super cautious to release HS3.

There's lots we don't know. The rumours could be wrong. There could be very good reasons for what he's doing that we know nothing about. But I think it's worth noting that if he is releasing in first quarter that is not necessarily expected from an artist his size and is something to think about.

(Would it be a surprise drop with no pre album singles? Where would there be time for singles? I'm very curious).

[medeafive]

I'm curious about Cruise!

Oh, thanks very much for asking about that! That’s actually a covid fic. In the early days, there was this one cruise ship where covid broke out and they weren’t allowed to land in Japan, I think (I think it was called Diamond Cruise). So, the fic is essentially a fake-dating mission where Natasha accompanies Bucky on the cruise because of some Hydra thing only he can recognize. And then covid breaks out and Natasha catches it (Bucky is immune because he’s a super soldier), so he has to nurse her while she’s sick and even after she gets better, they’re still stuck all day in their cabin and they get veeeery close. I wrote a solid beginning (which I’ll post below a read more) and then skipped all the fake dating to jump to the end and it’s basically abandoned now, though I hope to catch motivation again some day.

"Hell no. You can't make her do that."

Her doesn't even twitch, feet on the table, chin propped up on her palm, elbow propped up on her hip. She waits, lurking, and at some point she's going to come out swinging, whichever way. And she won't miss.

Fury rolls his eyes, except he doesn't. It's a skill Bucky admires. "Make her what, Barton?"

He used to find her kind of unremarkable- she's only human, after all, and a small one at that. Now he doesn't understand how she could ever not make the hair at the back of his neck stand. She exudes danger. It's on another frequency just out of earshot but it's deafening once you get attuned.

"Make her play cuddly with- no offense but maybe you should get out for this. With the guy who tried to murder her multiple times."

He doesn't get out and nobody seems to care. Nobody pays him any mind at all. Her still hasn't moved an inch. Like the mafia boss while everyone around argues and fights. He's seen some movies, it's just all a wash to him.

"I'm not making anyone do anything," Fury returns. "It's a fucking cruise. That's just the obvious cover. And I'm not letting a fairly new agent run a weeks long undercover operation without experienced backup."

"And how exactly do you imagine that going?" Barton asks. "Is she supposed to sleep in a small, windowless room? With him?"

"I'm sure we could work something out," her suggests surprisingly, not taking her chin out of her palm. "Build some trust."

She's not looking at him but he knows she's watching him. They're on the same frequency. The one for murderers and psychopaths. He doesn't get the feeling she's talking about her trust in him, like it's not her issue, which is eerie.

"Are you serious?" Barton questions in disbelief. He gets the feeling he wants to give her an easy out most of all, so she doesn't have to be the one who says no. "Come on, Nat. That's a swimming prison. Nowhere to run."

"I'm just saying," she adds casually, as if  she hasn't already made her decision. "Who goes on a cruise with his sister? Separate cabins? It just doesn't make sense."

"You could go separately," Steve suggests carefully. "Without connected covers."

Maybe it was when she went off the comms that one time, off the grid, and Steve said she would be fine and Barton said she was exactly where she wanted to be- and then she later walked out of the bunker, with the thing they'd been looking for the entire fucking time, crooked smile. Maybe that flicked the switch, maybe that's since when he can't see her as anything else than what she is, which is all sharp edges, all teeth, all danger. Maybe that's when it was.

"He has no experience," she points out, as if she needs to argue. "Fury is right, he needs supervision. And I can do the talking part."

Not his strong suit. "And you can sell that," Barton remarks dubiously, not specifying that.

"Sure," she replies, shrugging non-committedly. "And if he can't, I will."

He starts doubting he's actually here, with how they're all talking around him. "And I'm not making you," Fury remarks.

She grins, letting the sharp and blank shine through. "Have you ever?"

"That's settled, then," Fury finishes. He wonders if anyone ever asked him. "We'll work out the details. Ship leaves next week and then you're on your own."

They all get up and so he does, too, following Steve towards the elevator, but the hair on his neck signals to him she's there, right behind him, even if inaudible. He turns and she rolls to a stop, smoothly. "Scared?"

He shrugs. As if he would tell her. Throw her that kind of meat. "Well," she remarks, rocking up on her feet. "Better get used to it."

She's all up in his space all of a sudden, pressing his head down to her lips, and he just goes with it. There's nothing else on the other frequency than before, not that he expected it to be. It's weirdly silent around. At least he didn't startle.

"Mhm," she makes, pulling back. "Try again."

He leans down, thinking about the sharpness, nothing but the sharpness, like he's making out with a Kalashnikov, weirdly apt metaphor. But she's not that blunt an instrument, of course, more like a scalpel. A dagger. Anything that can cut someone's heart out.

She's grinning when he pulls back, sharp teeth. "Okay. I can work with that."

Barton looks half worried and half amused. He just gets on the elevator with Steve who looks at him weird, of course. Closes his eyes as soon as the doors glide together. Man. A fucking cruise. Just because he's the only one who's ever seen the stupid key they're after. And the book. Now he has to play a fucking tourist.

"Sure you can handle it?" Steve asks, sounding awfully worried, now that they're alone.

"It's just a cruise, Steve," he replies. "It's just a fucking cruise."

 They figure out a thing for his arm, they do his hair and they write him a comprehensive cover. He gets to pick what business school he went to, not nameless but not too famous, gets to pick his family background, his pet peeves. They try a few different things and end up sticking to glasses. He shaves.

He gets a briefing about her cover, too, and immediately, one of the photos slips out of the folder. She's on the cover of a magazine, supposed to look soft but he only sees the sharp edges. There's a handwritten note from her, in nice cursive, that he doesn't have to learn it by heart, that it's actually more convincing if he doesn't know everything. He reads the whole night.

She's… he's actually not quite sure. Something between a model and an actress and the kind of person a rich guy would call if he needed some arm candy. She's on Instagram, too, with a remarkable amount of followers and posts going back over three years. Nice to have such a machine at your back. She probably has fucking sponsoring deals. He read about that kind of thing.

They quiz him about his cover until he can recite the whole thing forward and backward and sideways. They quiz him about hers, too, but when he mixes it all up, the woman smiles and says that it's maybe even better this way. Better explain superficiality than try to fake it away.

He has to learn about his supposed job, too, daytrading and the commodity markets and fintec and junk bonds and all that kind of shit. That's probably what he's going to fuck up first. They teach him stupid managerial speak and quiz him about the political views he's supposed to have. When he's not talking about work, he needs to know everything about his fancy hobbies, tennis and mountain climbing and sailing. God, he hates himself.

When they travel to Okinawa, where they will board, he's so full of it, expert information and biographical details and mannerisms, he's never going to get all of that straight. Someone's life pressed into a week. How is he supposed to remember all of that, not mix it up? He'd have to be a totally different person.

"You know, I'm not particularly picky about who I make out with," she remarks. "If that helps. Not a big deal."

Of course. She'll just get it done. She's just worried he'll be difficult about it. "I'm not worried about that."

"Yes, you are," she replies seamlessly. "But I really don't care. You know, I even made out with Steve once."

That immediately sears itself into his brain, whether he wants it to or not. "Yeah. Okay."

"Different thing," she adds, starting to go through her handbag. "Sleeping arrangements. We could try shifts but that's probably not going to work. Are you claustrophobic?"

He shakes his head. He's scared of many things, though. Probably couldn't name them all if he tried. "Okay," she says. "Then it's probably easiest if one of us locks themselves in the bathroom overnight and we switch every day."

Great. Sleeping in the bathtub. "It locks from the inside, though."

"Yeah, but I'll definitely wake up from that," she replies. "You too. I considered the balcony, too, but that looks super weird if one of us sleeps outside."

Oh, no. Not at all. He wonders how long she thought about that until she felt safe with it. With him. "Okay. Bathroom."

"I'm sure it's fancy so we'll be fine," she says. "It looked fancy in the pictures."

 There are so many people. All getting on one ship. And she's talking the whole fucking time while he's just trying to find out where they're supposed to go, getting mad at him when he doesn't listen or reply or whatever shit, and at once he snaps at her. She pouts, sort of duckface if that's still a thing, turning and starting to complain to random people around them, which is fine by him as long as she leaves him alone-

It scares him to realize he's really angry, he didn't want to, certainly not to the point of losing control, snapping- yet he snapped perfectly in character. Without even trying. A few people around look at him sympathetically. It's weird but it feels sorta… good?

"Oh honey," she interrupts his calm. "Don't we have priority boarding? It's so humid out here. I'm sweating like a pig, I really need a shower. Do we have the suite with the bathtub? I'm dying out here, really. We should go for the pool first. No, shower, the shower with the…"

He stops listening after that, rolling his eyes before he even thinks about it. Wow. But he spots a sign soon after, different line, hopefully priority, the sign's golden-

She's talking with an elderly lady about the horrific heat. He takes a deep breath and just drags her that way, through the crowd, not letting go of her wrist because then he'll definitely lose her. He hears her giggle as she wiggles through the crowd. "Oh my. Oh my. You are certainly very hands-on today."

He has no fucking patience for that. Or Benedict has no fucking patience for that. Or both. "Could you just, for a second, shut up?"

She opens her mouth, gasping for a brief moment, but out only comes an angry hum. Sure, her lips are moving but he can tune the words out perfectly. The golden sign comes within reach and it's indeed their category, thank God. Now he just has to find the end of the queue. Benedict has studied in England, he would never cut in line.

They finally come to a stop, at the end of the quickly moving line. She pushes her gigantic glasses up her nose, huffing. "They better not lose our baggage. Once, on a flight, they lost my suitcase even though it had a new exclusive shawl by Hermes in it! Can you imagine? I was phoning after them for weeks and I never got anywhere, they just lost it. Never showed up again. I bet one of those shady flight attendants stole it. She was staring at me so jealously, you know, even though I barely had any makeup on, just a touch of rouge and-"

"They won't lose our baggage," he interrupts.

She stops and smiles, behind her enormous glasses, should be hard to make out but it's not, gets on her toes and quickly presses her lips to his, but he catches her head and keeps her there and- until someone clears their throat behind them, right, right, the queue, must move. He apologizes backwards, without really looking. She's smiling, moving forward, mood changed so quickly.

He doesn't really get why they would go on a cruise together when they already get so annoyed with each other. Why he would take her. He's pretty sure he's taking her, though no one told him that explicitly. The usher is staring at him expectantly, she's staring at him expectantly, and he fumbles for the tickets while she complains that he never keeps his things in order.

The usher's smile widens when he sees the price category on the ticket. "Oh, welcome on board, Mr. Darkwell, Miss Bigard. Let me escort you to your suite."

[atalana]

If Five was somehow given a way to assure his family's safety, do you think he'd have the potential to be a true villain? Like not necessarily evil but if he refuses to care about himself or others, would his lack of wanting anything reduce him to an antagonist? Or could he become a hero proper, or something else entirely? I'm curious about your thoughts on this!!

Hooo boy this is an interesting ask, thank you so much!

To first off answer your question, yes, absolutely, Five has the potential to be a villain. Under those specific circumstances, debatable, and there’s a few different factors that could go into it, so lets go into them properly

First off, how is he ensuring his family’s safety, and also does that affect the apocalypse? Because let’s take that one first, if his family survived into the apocalypse with him, Five would not be the Five we know. Honestly, as much as the apocalypse would suck, I think all of them would be better adjusted? It’s one thing to survive on your own, it’s a different thing altogether to survive as a team. They’d learn to work together, they’d get better at not following Hargreeves’ rules and life plan and all of that, it would be miserable sometimes, but they’d have each other, and a lot better mental everything.

If it means the apocalypse never happens, then Five travels into the future to meet his ~30 year old siblings. It would be weird, and he’d probably like to get back, but when he discovers he can’t it won’t be life shattering, because he’s still got his siblings, he’s just their younger brother now. Either way, Five has no reason to get involved with the Commission

But let’s say for the sake of argument that the apocalypse still happens, Five is still the Five in the show, it’s just that his siblings aren’t at risk and so we take that away as a factor.

Well, you’re right, he’s got a lot less of a drive to succeed now. But also, I think he still does want to stop the apocalypse? Because that’s what ruined his life, and Five’s not without morals, even if he frequently puts them aside, given the choice he’d still choose to save everyone, he definitely cares about people as a whole. Like, the closer it gets to the apocalypse in the show the more he starts using “everyone” instead of his family, he criticises the Handler for letting everyone die, he sides with Luther because “there are billions of lives at stake, we’re past trying to save just one”. Five, with no other factors changed, still wants to save the world.

So let’s talk about what would get him to leave everything behind.

Would he do it if his life was at risk? Interesting question. Because I don’t think Five necessarily cares about the world more than he cares about himself, it’s more, he stopped thinking about his own life as a factor ages ago. He’s been driven by this task for so long, he doesn’t know what he is without it. And as we’ve talked about, after everything he went through in the apocalypse, and with the Commission, he really sees himself a lot more as a tool to complete a task than a person with a life. He has absolutely no qualms about throwing himself at a problem to try and get it fixed. I think in a straight up “it’s you or the world” he’d probably choose to save the world? But that’s on pretty shaky ground.

For example, the Handler’s offer. He comes back to work for the Commission, if his family is safe and he gets to stop being thirteen again. In the show, both Five and the Handler went into that agreement knowing it was just a matter of who double crossed the other first. But if that was legit? Well, he still disapproves of the entire planet dying, but he’s killed a lot of people by himself, he’s very good at compartmentalising his feelings away in that respect. And he doesn’t like looking thirteen, he hates that people see him as a child, hates that the only clothes that fit him are the Umbrella Academy uniforms. It’s just that his own body dysmorphia ranks so low on his list of priorities compared to the literal apocalypse. Like, you can see it, he wants to take that offer so badly, it’s why the Handler keeps dangling it in front of his face with things like getting him new adult fitted outfits. The main problem is the Commission part. If that offer came from someone he trusted more than the Handler, I think he’d take it. He may not like what he was doing to the world in the process, but getting to look like himself and go live with his family far away from all of this, that’s a pretty tempting choice.

Is there a timeline where Five continues to work for the Commission? I think only if it was the only way to save his family, as in, they’d be actively in danger and continue to be if and only if he refused to work for the Commission. He may be good at Commission work, but he hates the place, hates what they stand for, sees them only as a means to an end. He’s only worked for them to use them, if he was going to continue working for them past the point they’re no longer useful to him, they would have to have something pretty strong to use against him, and after everything, I think his family’s lives are the only thing strong enough.

Now, villain, antagonist, those are interesting words to use here. Because here’s the thing - to many many people, Five is already a villain. Like, just on screen, people Five has knowingly and deliberately killed to further his own goals:

All of the mercenaries the Commission sent after him, who didn’t know what they were there for, just that they had to kill whoever the tracker led them to

At least one person in Dallas, 1963

37 people from the Hindenburg case, as a way to get the Handler off his back

At least one person fleeing the Commission

At least three Commission agents in the theatre

That’s nearly 50 people right there. And if you count all the accidental deaths Five caused with his actions but didn’t give a shit about, or all the people he assassinated when working for the Commission, the number is easily in the hundreds

To the families of all those people, Five is a villain, it just depends on what narrative you’re looking at. Really, despite being the most driven out of all of them to save the world, Five doesn’t have the moral high ground over anyone in this show. Maybe the Handler, but it’s pretty subjective.

Now antagonist, that’s even more interesting. Because in order to be an antagonist, you have to be working against the goals of the protagonists. Well, who are the protagonists in this hypothetical narrative? If you want to keep any aspects of this story the same, it only makes sense for them to be the other Academy kids, right?

So here’s a narrative for you. The Commission gets the upper hand on Five. They find another way to cause the apocalypse that doesn’t rely on Vanya (it’s possible, there’s one point in the comics where Hazel and Cha Cha literally manage to blow up the earth with a bunch of nuclear weapons Hargreeves had been stockpiling, long story, but they could blow up the moon for the same result as in the show). The Commission just wants this whole situation to be over, so they give him a choice - Five can go live somewhere else with his family and ignore the fact that the apocalypse will happen, or the entire Hargreeves family can die right now. But Five has to convince them to go.

Now, what do you do, when your little brother who you haven’t seen in seventeen years, shows up with a bunch of mercenaries and says the apocalypse is about to happen, and there’s nothing you can do to stop it, you just have to go with him and you can all live far away from it if you go right now. Well, you might say yes, if you think he’s being threatened into this, especially if he says your own life depends on it. But if you’ve been raised a superhero, well, you’re a lot more likely to fight back.

And if you see how well he can fight, how willing he is to kill completely indiscriminately, well, you’d probably have a hard time trusting anything he says.

Luther isn’t going to go, because Luther’s duty is to save the world. He’s going to try everything he can to do that, regardless of what Five says.

Diego isn’t going to go, because he cares about these people, he cares about making a difference in the world and doing good. He can’t do that if everyone’s dead.

There’s nothing on earth that could make Allison leave her daughter, and even if she could take Claire with her, I don’t think Allison “trying to be a better person and fix her life” Hargreeves would be too happy about raising her daughter knowing she let Claire’s father die, letting Claire know she’s a coward who took the easy way out

Klaus might go. But Ben would be very very against it.

Vanya will hear Five out, but won’t be able to believe it, and even if she does, she’s got a life here too, and she’s not gonna be super psyched to leave everything just to go with her siblings who’ve always excluded her, and some of whom currently actively hate her.

And let’s be real, Five isn’t going to try and convince them if Five can try and force them. In canon, the only person he talks to is Vanya, and when she doesn’t immediately try to help him, he abandons that plan entirely. He only goes back to his family when he’s out of leads with no idea what to do.

Some of them are going to assume Five is being threatened and try to help him, which Five doesn’t want, because that puts them in more danger. Some of them are going to assume Five’s completely lost it, and is now a danger to them, and are going to try and stop him, which Five doesn’t want, because that’s just letting them all die in the apocalypse.

It would be a disaster, and would go a lot better if these kids could communicate with each other, but they’re so bad at that. I don’t know how the whole thing would play out, if Five would be swayed by their attempts to stand strong against the apocalypse, or if he knows there’s no hope and is just trying to save them against their will, but either way, it would be very fun to watch

[cutegirlmayra]

I'm actually a little curious of what would happen if Amy DID loose herself on that one prompt where it's explained if something happens to the past self, the present ones would feel bruises, or something like that. Good luck! Not that you need it anyway since you're writing is just... I can't even describe it. What a better word for phenomenal?

Lol, how about ‘I love you?’ *wn* thank you so much!

WARNING: For the faint of the precious heart feels, plz read with some caution.

Original: (x)

                    ALTERNATIVE “DARK” ENDING

Prompt:

“Stooopp!!!”

“L-leave this to us…”

“We don’t want you to change! You’ll only hurt yourself by being something you’re not! But we will fight with you!”

“Please! Listen to us!”

In a moment of true weakness, her heart feeling heavy and her hammer held tightly as if she was a rabid animal, Classic Amy breathed heavily and looked down.

She didn’t see their faces.

She barely saw through the blur of her eyes, her hands shaking and her vision going in and out of focus.

Her mind barely grasped their words… till she felt a strong hand upon her own, which was gripping her hammer.

She lightly shifted her gaze her to it, but never looked up into the keeper’s eyes.

Her mind was wild, it wasn’t stable.

Modern Amy tried to run to help the others but fell as her head started to throb, her grip on herself slowly disintegrating as she gripped her head.

“W..what’s going on? I can’t… I can’t think straight… I’m.. I’m…”

Classic Amy shook her head, “N-…Nooo!!!” she flailed and fought. Her sudden movement shocked her friends as they were tossed around and flung away from her.

She looked up with unchecked rage at the robot, and swung her hammer out towards it, readying for battle.

“Very well, foolish girl.” Classic Eggman fired the machine gun.

She skillfully arched and swerved her way through it, before smashing the robot’s footing and getting it off center.

Thanks to her practice, she found some weak points and targeted its balance, before the cannon charged and fired her back and away from them.

“No!” The Modern Sonic Team cried out, trying to desperately get up, before succeeding. Racing against time, Knuckles reached out and gripped Classic Amy’s limp body, grinding his shoulder against the rock of the broken earth and rolling along with the bumps and ramps in it.

Out of sheer power, he dug his knuckles into the earth, and stopped them before they both went tumbling into a gorge of glowing lava…

He breathed in his own sweat and the smoke suck to the inside of his mouth. But he didn’t care much, looking down at the precious jewel in his arms.

She was out cold. Her color faded. Her quills still spiked in aggression and tension.

“Ah, kid…” He breathed out, seeing as she really took a blow.

He let his head fall just above hers, trying to catch some air, but nothing was cleaning his lungs from the smoke and heatstroke he was experiencing so close to the edge.

Tails flew over and helped them up, before realizing…

Modern Sonic fought with the Classic Team, it was clear his quills had risen somewhat in his distress at seeing Classic Amy blasted away like that.

Taking down the main threat after seeing she would be alright was his first priority, then he could check on her later.

“Amy!” Tails turned to look out into the distance, squinting his eyes before his panic threw him into a loop.

The two dimensions were almost fully one… when more than just 7 Chaos Emeralds flickered into existence near Amy.

Modern Amy’s body was collapsed on the ground… but her color was faded as well, as the emeralds started spiraling around her, glowing as if getting some form of a power source around her.

With Modern’s universes Master Emerald obliterated by the Eggmans, having the Classic era’s Master Emerald and destroying any further way to charge the emeralds, it was almost a complete victory…

But Tails quickly pulled Knuckles and Classic Amy from the edge even further and then flew out to meet her.

“Amy! What’s going on!?” he cried out, seeing the emeralds flicker out of existence after touching her back, turning her even darker.

“Amy..?” he slowed down, his voice growing faint, before backing up a little bit… his arm over his head as if to shield him from something…

Sonic and the Classic Sonic Team finally took down the robot, getting ready to capture the Eggmans when they turned around at a shadow moving swiftly over the land…

The fires dimmed… but made the only light possible.

“Oh no… are the universes one?” Tails looked at the darkened sky and quickly back to Amy.

Something was going on… but he didn’t know what.

What he didn’t know… was that because the two dimensions were now polluted with uncharacteristic potential reactions… that the universe was being changed constantly.

He didn’t even realize it happening to him, but could certainly see Amy’s body burst out into a darkness power.

The reverse of Super Form was because of the corruption of time and space, and instead of a controlled power…

Modern Amy slowly got up to her knees.

At first, Tails smiled, “Amy!” he moved a little forward, being knocked back a moment but was unsure of the dark aura…

His smile faded when she stood with a blank expression, her eyes empty except for a void of white, and the darkness whisking around her in desperate need of stability.

In fear and exhaustion, the team were forced to dodge and even fight back against her bursts of power, attacking anything that moved, and seeming unable to recognize them.

“I don’t think that’s Amy!” Tails cried out, dodging another dark energy pulse that came from her, laying down from the impact. “I… urk… I think it’s the essence of the universe! It’s just as distressed, and with all the pressure of the two dimensions being painfully merged together… I think it’s just using her as an outlet!”

“That shouldn’t make sense!” Knuckles, still holding onto Classic Amy’s dangling body, jumped to the side to avoid a power blast.

“…” Modern Sonic clenched his teeth, unable to speak.

He sped up and burst out into a spin dash towards her.

However, Modern Amy turned her ghostly head and blasted a motionless pulse that spun him off his course.

He landed on his knees and braced with his hands, hitting the ground. “No..! This wasn’t.. suppose to happen… Amy! I know you’re in there!” he whipped himself around, “You gotta remember yourself… control yourself!” he was more aggressive as well, everyone being altered through the pollution of the two shredded and torn realities.

“Who are you!?”

She didn’t move again, as a pulse pushed him back but he remained able to withstand through the placement of his feet, skidding against the ground some in resistance.

“Grr… You said you felt weird… but you never said you were turning against yourself!” he cried out, shielding with squinted eyes against the furry of hot air and dark pressure trying to push him away.

“Amy! Say something!”

Nothing… just staring in his direction… the darkness building more unimaginable rage and even less comprehension…

But she broke.

Her face suddenly gave way to strained pain, stretching her face back before she swiped her hand out and her eyes turned a darkness with a shadow as it’s pupil.

“You care about us… we’re your friends… you may be the first to morph because of all this.. but if we don’t do something… you won’t be the last!”

A painful cry rang out as the gang turned to see Classic Tails gripped his head, staggering backwards as multiple colored emeralds appeared around him before flickering away when they touched his struggling body. He tried to smack them away but they suddenly, violently thrust themselves and their power into him.

“N…no..” Modern Tails watched in horror, before looking at his hands and seeing the color fade.

He looked up… but without much warning… his eyes widened as he immediately felt swallowed up at the same time as his Classic self burst into a dark silhouette and fainted.

Modern Tails’s entire body was consumed in dark flames, as they formed into some figure of a mythological fox spirit, residing on all fours and having sharp, jagged teeth. The darkness flared up but returned to his normal size, as Modern Tails began to savagely attack Classic Sonic with his new found form. Running on all fours, he slashed through to injury him, leaving Modern Sonic to reel back and watch as a slow-moving scar began to be created on the side of his chest, moving across and just stopping before the center of his body.

He breathed in fear, feeling scared, and not understanding why he couldn’t push past it like he used too.

Immediately grabbed his Classic self, Knuckles took both kids in hand and started racing away from the Classic double-ganger of Modern Tails.

The Eggmans had already begun to cringe with mouths open on the ground, feeling great pain as more emeralds swarmed them from the other dimension. As if time and space were fighting against the merger, and also going insane…

“We… Argh! Have to get to the AUUUHH…. Master Emerald.” Modern Eggman put an arm over his Classic Self, trying to help him up as he looked as though he were painfully dying, but hoisted him over his shoulder as the pain also replicated to him, causing him to fall once again to the ground.

“The Master Emerald?” Knuckles looked into the fallen robot, seeing the gem start to dangle over the fire crevice… “Oh no!” he quickly looked to the kids…

Judging what would be better, he put the kids down beside each other, seeing his Classic self take off his head, and hold it to his chest.

“We’re in deep… aren’t we, buddy?” His Classic self held a solemn look as if trying to resist accepting his fate just yet.

“…Hmm. We’ll make it.” Knuckles gave him a thumbs up, a confident smile, before booking it to rescue what could be their only hope…

Classic Sonic fought off Modern Tails, but only keeping him back with rapid spin-dashes, having marks everywhere from battle damage.

Modern Sonic could feel every attack, and gripped his arm as his body mimed taking injury… walking towards Modern Amy.

“You… have to fight it… both of you… all of us…”

The Eggmans shifted, turning into spider-like robots in dark form, and charging after Knuckles to stop him- the emeralds combining the Eggmans with parts of the fallen robot they, themselves, had invented…

Amy started to laugh.

A darkness rose behind her, a pillar to be feared, as she began to step back into it. “You think… that was… love?”

The fire engulfed her, morphing her fully into a shadowed beast, raising her up to loom over Sonic at the top of the pillar.

He could barely stand up any longer… feeling the effects of the universe… but he wasn’t going to fall so easily…

He rose his head to watch her form and then listened to her shriek out her next line-

“Now you’ll feel the pain!!!”

“…Funny.” He straightened out his back.

The universe closed in all around him, Modern Knuckles throwing the Master Emerald before the dark, mutated Eggmans got to him, and Classic Knuckles rushing to grab it and abandoning the fallen Classic Amy as she stirred to start forming into a dark creature as well.

He passed it to Classic Sonic, “Go long!” he cried out, his hat flying off into the wind.

Classic Sonic stumbled but caught it, holding it up before an attacking shadow beast, not even seeing it as his friend anymore.

“For something that wasn’t real… it still brings you lasting pain?” he gave himself a smile… before an Emerald jabbed into his shoulder, being absorbed by him. “AH!”

Like a gunshot, Sonic fell to his knees again…

But Modern Amy twitched back at his words, before shaking her head.

“You ruined the cosmos! You destroyed me!”

“…Amy did care…” Sonic gasped out, fighting with quakes against the pain in his shoulder, seeing another Emerald flicker into existence, he turned his head in reflex and dodged it as it lunged towards him.

Classic Sonic stumbled and dropped the Master Emerald, having it roll through the broken earth’s ramps and peaks before falling near Modern Sonic…

“Amy doesn’t exist!”

Sonic rose his head, “So you are the universe!”

The dark formed creature leaned its head back in surprise, realizing Sonic knew that darkness was invading the world through pollution. They weren’t his friends anymore… it was possession.

He dashed to the Master Emerald in one last attempt for freedom, Knuckles shifting, his Classic self fading, and Sonic seeing the darkness start to quickly consume him.

Suddenly… everything was black… all Sonic could see through it was his white, gloved hand… reaching for a faint emerald color…

Then the light shone before he was fully taken over.

Chaos emerged and was released from the emerald, encircling Sonic in a brilliant glow.

He was purified and turned super, immediately using Chaos’s abilities to cover the world and split the dimensions back into their proper place.

Classic Amy woke up under a tree. The sun shining, the air clean.

She looked around before she saw a patch of flowers swaying by her, freshly picked.

She smiled and happily smelled them before a figure walked up behind her.

A few… actually.

“What are you doing way out here, Rosy?” Tails leaned over to smile at her, as Sonic and Knuckles looked to one another and then smiled down at her too.

“Need a lift?” Knuckles offered, as he held out a hand for her.

Happy, content, and not even wondering why everything was so peaceful, Amy had no idea the adventure that had happened in another pocket of time and space; and with the healed universe, took Knuckles’s hand, and leaped into Sonic’s arms.

[cherrybracelets]

Hi I'm here to fill your ask box. Something I need to get off my chest is I'm tired of people asking me to date a girl. Yes, I am bisexual, yes I talk about how I am attracted to women but it's fucking exhausting when everyone only acknowledges that I'm attracted to women. I understand it's probably because most people are just curious but it's really starting to annoy me when all my friends say that dating a girl is my priority. It's at the point where if I liked a guy I wouldn't tell them

hi love!!! first of all, nothing dating a girl doesn’t make ur bisexuality any less valid. ive been in a relationship with a man for four years, i have never dated a girl and im STILL BI!!!!! I’m sorry that your “friends” are making you feel this way, that’s incredibly upsetting. i hate the way we make bi people feel less bi if they aren’t actively dating the same gender. it’s literally nauseating. just know you are supported here, whoever you decide to date or not date. at the end of the day it’s all about happiness and if u find yourself happy with a guy u are still a beautiful bi person and super valid and loved!!!!

[bipolyjack]

Please tell me more about why you like sheith, I'm very curious to hear the rest of it.

(alright luckily i had the beginning of this saved elsewhere when tumblr just randomly sent it early so imma just begin by pasting. also spoilers for voltron s4 obv) 

the original ask was something like “curious why u like sheith? ive thought abt it and i think i prefer klance”

rubs hands 2gether Thank U for Asking

first of all, thats chill! if klance is ur thing, fuckin go for itmy dude, have a great time with that shit. the fandom’s huge andtheres tons of content. im all for ppl shippin what they want and imnot here to tell someone to ship or not ship something. if u do trulywant to know why im a sheith tho, buckle the fuck up cause im awashin sheith feelings at every moment and i got Things 2 say

alright so the main thing with sheith is that it feels realhealthy and good. (well it did. things are weird this season bc shiromay or may not be a clone but up until his disappearance at least.)they’re rly good abt checking in with each other to see how theother one’s doing and feeling, and they lean on each other a lotfor support. they also treat each other as equals and respect each other’s choices (again, with minor exceptions in the current season). they got that good good hidden backstory together. they got that good good star crossed lovers thing goin on where the universe keeps ripping them apart, fucking them over and tossing them back together more fucked up than before and my dude i Eat That Shit UP. also that good good height difference.the show gives them lots of moments where they’re either alone in a room together havin a private moment or havin an equally private moment in front of the whole fuckin team where fuckin everybody can see them (like the first Hug tm). they’re openly physically intimate with each other (which keith is not with anyone else) and they’re not like. ashamed of that. there’s so much canon content i cry daily. 

here lemme break it down

we know they knew each other in the garrison, and not just like in passing, like acquaintances, but enough that keith was the only person there to see shiro off when the kerberos mission launched. in s1ep1 lance says of shiro “omg that guys my hero” and of keith “you’re my rival” but neither shiro nor keith know who lance even fuckin is. bc presumably they didnt hang out. everyone in the garrison knows who keith and shiro are but they - keith especially it seems like - dont keep track of the other students. also theres this whole fanon thing where shiro and matt were best friends in the garrison and hung out all the time before kerberos, but in s4 when matt greets shiro hes incredibly stiff and awkward and calls him sir and shiro just goes “pidge never gave up on u buddy” which i guess could be a clone thing but could also be him bein like “i totally did give up on u tho, whatever” (and i can totally buy that considering how pidge’s whole personal arc this whole time has been looking for matt and their dad, and while shiro has been supportive of that, he’s also been like hey dude that’s not our top priority as a team). so from that i infer that matt and shiro werent best buds in the garrison, and that he must have spent a lot more of his time with keith bc in s2ep1 keith makes it clear that shiro made a significant impact on his life and that he still thinks about things shiro said to him before kerberos. which we havent seen. bc theyre hiding the pre-kerberos backstory from us and i cry. also their flashbacks in s1ep2 (i think, i dont exactly remember which ep but i think its that one) when they all put on the headsets and we see their fondest memories, shiro’s is the day they were separated and keith’s is the day they found each other again like jesus.

then there’s keith’s first scene in the show. the first thing we see him doing is kicking the shit out of like three garrison guys to rescue shiro. we get that close up of him touching shiro’s unconscious fuckin face and his first line in the whole show is him saying shiro’s name. like shit dude how am i supposed 2 not ship that. the first time keith and lance interact, its lance butting in on that moment and keith being like “who the fuck are u” and its. uncomfortable. we also know that keith has been livin alone in the desert and obsessing over these lion carvings bc he got kicked out of the garrison for basically insubordination sometime after shiro went missing. we get that scene in the shack where keith talks abt feeling lost until shiro showed up and everyone else in the room looking all confused and uncomfortable as these two dudes who clearly already know each other well and have been separated for like a year just stare into each other’s eyes or what the fuck ever. also the scene outside the shack where keith comes and finds shiro and puts a hand on his shoulder and asks him how hes doing - theyre alone for that part. also worth mentioning is that keith has no hesitation touching shiro’s galra tech arm, whereas lance hesitates before shaking his hand. we see a bunch of times that keith is touch averse with almost everyone except shiro, in a way that indicates a degree of prior familiarity and a good understanding of boundaries that keith hasnt had the time or inclination to set up with lance, hunk, pidge, allura, coran etc. also the one time he holds lance when sendack attacks the castle and lance is unconscious, lance sort of blows it off later and basically goes “no homo” when keith brings it up so that was a bummer

i also love some of the Pauses they put into shiro and keith’s dialogue, some of them are just. so choice. like when keith proposes a crazy plan that puts him in danger and shiro just takes a sec, closes his eyes, then goes “alright i’ll back u up, do what u gotta do” like!!!! boi!!!!!! thats good shit. also in s2ep9 during the blade of marmora trial when keith is basically having this nightmare about shiro rejecting him because of his connection to the galra, (which real actual shiro can see because this whole ep was a fuckin fanfiction) and he does that same thing where hes like “shiro... *pause, close eyes for Just a sec* you’re like a brother to me” which! by the way!! i have said the same thing!! to a friend i had a crush on!!! who was straight!!!! and i was a little baby who didnt know i was into girls yet and we used to say we were like sisters bc i? didnt know i?? was gay???? we shared her bed whenever i stayed over and she really did see me as a sister and i would just lie next to her and daydream about touching her boobs,, anyway keith is so relatable there i could yell forever but continuing on,

can we, real quick, talk abt the first time keith flies the black lion? bc in s2ep1 hes not the black paladin yet. real shiro is still around. and keith legit goes up to black, puts a hand on her big ole nose and goes “ur boi is in trouble, we gotta help him” and she goes “yeah dude hop in” like?????????????? thats some fanfic shit again! black Knows! also dont even talk to me abt how many times keith and shiro yell each others names in that ep its unreal. also the trope (that i eat the fuck up every time) of one member of the otp lying trapped and injured somewhere and talking to the other member of the otp thru a helmet comm or whatever and they cant see each other but they can hear each others voices, so they have to keep talking to like reassure each other they’re both still alive and okay?!!! im such a sucker for that shit!!!! ummmmm the fact that shiro keeps reassuring keith that hes fine when theres a gaping glowing wound in his side and hes like visibly in pain, clenching his teeth, eyes closed, groaning, sweat beading on his forehead, the whole fuckin thing?? and josh knocked it outta the park with shiro’s voice in that ep making him sound like he was trying not to sound hurt and exhausted so that keith wouldn’t worry too much like Fuck me up!! smiling thru the pain when keith talks abt how much shiro changed his life and made him a better person??? boi!!!!!

then there are the times when shiro talks abt something happening to him and keith taking over as voltron’s leader, and keith gets all panicked about it like he cant stand the thought of losing shiro again (this happens a bunch of times but the ones that are coming to mind are s2ep1 and s2ep9 bc. again. those are the fanfic episodes). and then he Does lose him again and he’s so clearly grieving, lashing out at the rest of the team, super obviously feeling shiro’s loss more than the others (and lance is a real dick about it a bunch of times which really rubbed me wrong), going out to look for him over and over bc he wants to believe so bad that shiro’s out there somewhere. omg the “please no” when the black lion accepts him that shit Fucked me right up!! he wants to honor shiro’s wishes!! but some part of him knows that’s like admitting that shiro’s gone and isn’t coming back. and then!!!!!! when they find kuron and its just the red lion and the galra ship floating alone in space just like. gently drifting toward each other. keith’s little tired smile there. fuck me up. and then we find out in the next scene that keith has been the only one in shiro (kuron)’s room while he’s recovering and shiro (kuron) hasnt bothered to shave or cut his hair or get dressed yet and he lets keith see him like that and not the rest of the team. fuck. keith looks Exhausted in that scene. hes got bags under his eyes, hes kinda hunched in on himself, arms crossed, like something in him Knows this isnt his boi but he wants to believe it’s him so bad and its. god. its a lot. and Then when hes turning to leave and kuron is like “how many times will u have to save me before this is over” and keith’s face just relaxes into this legitimately genuine smile when he says “as many times as it takes” like!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck me

this is where it starts gettin awkward with them bc kuron isnt shiro and he doesnt treat keith the way shiro would but he Tries, like after keith fucks up that one mission and kuron comes and finds him (again, in private) to touch his shoulder and be like “im proud of u boi” when keith clearly Did Not Do A Good Job and keith just looks bummed like “thats. thats not tru” and it Hurts me bc we know real shiro doesnt do fake praise. also kuron orders keith to put himself in danger more than once and doesnt give a shit that keith and the others get hurt because of it which also real shiro would never do - we’ve seen him react when his teammates take hits before, but especially keith, like during the bom trial. then theres s4ep1 where keith sort of drifts away from team voltron in order to do more stuff with the blade of marmora and everyone’s pissed at him but then as hes walking out kuron’s like “you know we’re here for you if you need us” and keith gets that soft smile again like “i know and i cant tell you how much that means to me” and then they do that good good hand clasp that turns into a hug which by the way is a stark contrast to when other people hug keith and they just kinda grab him and he goes all stiff and it takes him a sec or three to put his arms around them if he even does that at all - with shiro they do the hand clasp first and then walk into the hug together and keith buries his face in shiro’s fuckin shoulder and smiles and closes his eyes and i wanna die. and theyve done this twice now which makes me think they probs did it before kerberos too and that also hurts me. 

then theres s4ep6 where keith has gone the whole season feeling like he was a bad leader. it seems like voltron doesnt rly need him and his friends dont need him and shiro doesnt need him and hes been hanging with the bom who have their whole philosophy of not going back to rescue their own guys if it means putting the mission or the rest of the team in danger (which keith already was saying when allura was captured - how very galra of him) and now keith’s having to readjust to that mindset after being part of such a close knit team. so when he sees a way to take that shield down, he just fuckin goes for it. hes started to see himself as expendable. when shiro thinks hes about to die, we get all kinds of flashbacks, the first of which is him and keith alone outside the shack. there are no flashbacks with keith. he just closes his eyes. and shiro (kuron) congratulates him. like obv its before he knows what keith was about to do, but still, thats some fucked up shit. 

now this wasnt rly part of ur question, ie u didnt ask me how i felt abt klance, but i feel like i gotta say: lance just grates on me. im sorry i know lots of people who love him but he just. isnt my cup of tea. and i do think the relationship shown in the show between keith and shiro is a lot more mature and healthy than the one shown between lance and keith. lance has some good moments! but canon lance and fanon lance seem like two entirely different people to me a lot of the time and thats all cool and fine if ur lookin for that, again im not here to stop ppl from having fun, but there are so many good sheith moments in the show and im just glad to see the relationship between two dudes depicted that way regardless of whether it becomes canon or not. also lance in the show is only shown being attracted to girls, and in kinda a skeevy way - like ive met guys who treat me like that and been Very off-put by that kind of behavior. and it would put me off if after all that they got him together with keith. like hes just superficially interested in all these hot girls but keith, who he has very few heartfelt intimate moments with onscreen, is his True Love? like thats,, not good bi rep. i Do rly like the bond hes been building with allura since they switched lions, that seems like its going in a direction that could turn out to be very wholesome and sweet. but again, if klance is ur thing, by all means have a ball.

k that was a lot but tl:dr i like 2 cry and sheith provides me with lots of opportunities to do that,, if u read it all then thank u deeply and truly for ur attention, u probs Understand me as a person a bit better than before lol