#but I wouldn't be if it wasn't for the romanticization of cooking

[goatmilksoda]

I had a whole rant prepared but I felt like my feelings were better summed up in a meme.

[dragonflame32]

Bad Sansuary day 10: careful (feat. Horror)

I am using a little OC of mine for this, since I think she really fits the Bad Sanses (ahem she's crazy ahem). We're in a scenario where she's been with the gang for a while now. There is no romanticism in this, I think it'll mainly be her interacting with the gang following the prompts. It's also a weird mix of canon, fanon and headcanon. I tried my best, but beware of the cringe >_<

For this one I asked for help, like in a few other cases where I asked to different people, and my friend wanted it to be mentioned so that's why I'm telling this. Credits for the original idea (that I modified a bit) go to @rain0099

Every character belongs to its respective owner

Ashes belongs to me

Bad Sansuary belongs to @owl-bones

Horror wasn't angry. He wasn't furious, nor irritated. He wasn't annoyed.

He was straight up pissed.

He had been able to keep the anger in for a while, not reacting to anything Ashes did or said no matter the lengths she'd apparently go just to piss him off. He had been able to ignore everything, quietly holding his grudge instead of hurting Ashes in return. Meanwhile she kept pushing all his buttons, as if she wanted to see him snap, and purposely went out of her way just to see him suffer.

At first, it was only "innocent" things. Moving around some things in his room (he still had no idea how she managed to get in), stealing some things and hiding them around the castle or taking random small animals like birds or frogs and trapping them in his drawers or somewhere else in his room. Then, bored, she shifted her focus to the kitchen, doing the exact same things on the food and observing him as he searched around the castle just to see his face.

She was quick to notice how playing around with food took a much bigger reaction out of Horror than messing with his room, so she took it to the next level a few days after noticing that. She started to not only steal food just to retrieve it to the kitchen days later when it was rotten and mold had grown on it, but also to ruin perfectly good food by throwing toxic things in it while it was cooking, leaving him extremely distressed.

But she had reached the breaking point when she set fire to the kitchen, and as Horror was staring at the flames crackling in front of him, he felt a rage very similar to the one that brought him to destroy the Core back in his AU. He didn't care what would happen, or if there would be consequences to what he'd do. Now that Ashes had crossed the line, he made it his personal goal to make her regret ever doing that to him.

It took a few days to gather enough food to replace what had been lost, and a few more to prepare all the traps. Then he made sure that whatever Ashes did she wouldn't be able to escape the little game he prepared. He waited patiently for the right moment until everything was perfectly in place, hiding what he was doing to everyone else including the Boss and Dust and Killer. They didn't need to know, and he wouldn't want to get in trouble with the Boss.

Then, after he was done, he waited until Ashes' guard was low and he could take her out without anyone noticing. It wasn't easy to do but he still managed, knocking her out and dragging her into the area of the woods outside the castle he had filled with his traps. He knew Ashes was somewhat immortal, he had seen fatal attacks stab through her and her take them out like they were nothing, but she was still somewhat affected by the pain, seemingly becoming more broken and crazy every time she went through intense amount of it.

He waited until she woke up, observing her from the shadows as she slowly examined her situation like this was all some kind of game. It didn't take long for her to fall into the first trap, a rope snapping around her neck and dragging her into the air, suffocating her as she hanged and tried to get down with no success. He watched as she got free after a few minutes of slowly suffocating after the rope apparently snapped. He was a little disappointed it hadn't held very long, but he was immediately satisfied again as Ashes fell into a bear trap that snapped around the lower half of her body, barely getting free before an axe stabbed through her after flying off of a tree and she was actually showing some signs of difficulty.

She forced her torn body to move forward, probably searching for an exit but only managing to fall through more and more traps as Horror could basically see whatever sanity she had left dwindle down with each and every painful trap she fell into, getting cut and stabbed and burned alive and drowned, and sometimes Horror himself would carry out the executions by taking advantage of her fragility and ambushing her directly, "killing" her with great sadism.

After a very long while of basically torturing Ashes, he left her alone there and got back to the castle, pretending like nothing happened. Odds were that the freak wouldn't remember a thing, and he'd be able to get his revenge without getting into trouble for it. He knew Ashes probably wouldn't suddenly be nice to him, but he knew that she wouldn't mess with him ever again, and he still got his revenge so as far as it concerned him, if she didn't do anything else against him they were even now.

She would learn to be very careful around him from now on

[thelittleliars]

Darkness

Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Warnings: Depression, suicidal thoughts

Words: 902

A/N: I wrote this for my OWN comfort. Depression sucks and I know no matter what I'll always have to live with my it for the rest of my life. This all is just wishful thinking, the way I'd want it to go away even tho it never will. Pls don't see this as me romanticizing depression or any other mental health issues/disorder.

The dark days always hit you hard. The darkness crept upon you as if you hadn't seen the signs but you had seen them. You just couldn't do anything to stop it so you stopped wasting your energy on that and let it happen. Though during the days you always hoped for the next day to be better. It never was. At night all the Demons & Monsters were lying next to you in bed wide awake thinking about all the things you couldn't change. 

Mornings were incredibly hard for you as you could never seem to get up and often question if you still got the guts to keep waking up. When you did get up and were among people in public you hid every part of yourself so no one would see how close to the ledge you were about to jump off from.

A bunch of times followed where you were close to simply get hit by a bus or leaning too far over the railing of a skyscraper. It never happened, it made you even more miserable and at some point it seemed as if even death didn't want you. 

You sat once again on a bench at the Central Park consumed by thinking shallow thoughts that kept you somehow still afloat. Friends were long abandoned, you hadn't reached out in days if not weeks. You couldn't bring yourself to care them, not if this darkness robbed you of ever little strength you had left, you also had no mental capacity for yet another living creature.

Someone had sat down next to you as you were digging yourself your mental grave, you did not notice them, at least not until you felt the first snow flakes falling against your skin. It was Natasha Romanoff, your supposed 'home'. Only supposed home since you didn't feel the feeling of home for a long time now. You had once pushed her away from you. It was something you regretted but never made an attempt to make up for.

"Sharon called me." She started which not explaining further since she knew that you'd know exactly the reason why. "Shit sounded bad so I tracked you down. Was surprised at how good you became at disappearing." You did not utter a single word. Natasha knew you wouldn't answer, most times when it all got too much you turned semi verbal or even nonverbal. "Let's get you to your apartment?" She stood up and held her hand out for your to take. You didn't want to go, sitting there in the cold gave you a sense of comfort that you longed for. "We can watch a movie or simply lie in bed while staring at the stars we hung up on your ceiling." You were hesitant with putting your hand in hers since the lump in your chest felt only heavier. You dreaded to go 'home'. The single reminder of your bedroom reminded you that those four walls had seen too much already and that added more suffocation to your existing pile. 

At your apartment you seemed to crumble even more into yourself. How much more falling into the deep was possible? You didn't know, still hoping that the bottom would come soon enough. The deep bottom you thought would come and wished it came, didn't come, instead a steadiness of the dark arrived, you believed this was your bottom of this awful 'phase'. 

One night of staying with you turned into fully two weeks. Natasha basically moved back in with you. At first she wasn't so sure if it would be worth it but then she really thought about it and came to the conclusion that it was worth it, you were always worth it. As hard as it were for her, she knew how much harder it must had been for you. She single handly saw how at the end you were. You didn't even had the energy to push her away anymore. 

Night after night she laid quietly in bed with you. Day after day she helped you cooking, doing the dishes, changing clothes and if it was an extremely bad day she helped washing your body and hair. On a day you felt better yet still awful, you bought her flowers and her favorite alcohol. You were grateful for her and everything she did for you. She soon became a reason for you to start fighting the dark again. This time you were hopeful that things could get better. And they did, extremely slow for your liking but you couldn't complain, not after surviving your demons and monsters. 

Natasha stood by your side of every step you took. She even went to therapy with you when you told her you wanted to try it. She made sessions lighter until you were comfortable enough to go alone. Looking back you wanted to cry over how much she sacrificed to help you. You felt guilty about that but she reassured you that she'd do it all over again if she had the chance because it was worth it. You were worth it all. To seeing you smile, to seeing you being you, to gazing into each others eyes, to getting to touch you, to being held by you, to loving you and getting loved by you. 

Sometimes all you need is someone who understands you deeply and helps you simply with their presence. 

[crystalstylehexagon]

"Soulmates" pt2 - Kakashi & Reader

requested by: @hoohamaru

A/N: I feel like this "one-shot" will end up split into more than two chapters lmao.

requests: open

enjoy!

pt1

pt3

Y/n just finished her shift at one of Konoha's famous restaurants. She sighed, changing from her uniform, and glanced up, thinking. She had another date today. She just hoped he was the right one. To tell you about herself, Y/n was an average, working woman in the world of the ninja. Her restaurant, Teuchi's ramen shop, and tea shop down the southern streets. She absolutely LOVED her job. It paid well and she got to do what she loved most in this world - cooking. She had been cooking since she was a little kid. Her grandmother taught her while she was still alive, and she cherished those memories. Luckily for her, her parents supported her decision to become a chef. So, after graduating from the Ninja Academy, she dropped out of the program after becoming a chunin to continue pursuing her passion. Now in her mid-thirties, she became lonely and decided, to finally get back into dating, thinking it was time. Since she was successful, she could focus on other things like love and potentially, a family!

Of course, living in a world where soulmates existed, it wasn't, easy finding love, nor was it easy getting through daily tasks without being asked "Did the name of your soulmate appear?" or the looks of pity they'd give her when she replied "No". Honestly, it was getting annoying, but she didn't let that get to her. After all, the last thing she needed right about now was becoming self-conscious. Her soulmate could simply not be in this era, or have died a long time ago for all she knew or she simply didn't have one. It was rare, but she took comfort in that, being a skeptic. She didn't want some fate to decide who she ended up with, after all. She yearned to find her love without the "soulmate" beliefs. After all, soulmates didn't always mean that they HAD to become a couple. There had been rare occasions where soulmates ended up being from the same family, so it didn't mean that just because they were soulmates, they had to fall for each other. Even though she was a highly skeptical person, she still subscribed to the theory that soulmates meant being two halves of one soul, one person, not some lost lovers, or however, kids romanticized soulmates these days.

But, so far, she had no luck with the previous dates she had been with… She had gone through 15 blind dates and three arranged dates by her friends. And this would be her sixteenth one. She stood in front of the mirror, before doing a quick skin-care routine; Washing her face from the day's work, re-doing her bun, and applying some moisturizer. She let it sit while she put on a simple, black, off-shoulder dress, adorning it with a dark green velvet belt that covered the waist. She put on a set of knee-high, heeled boots to go with the outfit. Once she felt her face was good to go, she applied some makeup, opting to use darker colors for this one to make her eyes pop, but she did keep it light so it wouldn't look cakey and too much. She then brushed out her hair. She did a once-over in the mirror, before picking up her handbag, putting her makeup inside, and leaving the workplace.

She wasn't going to lose hope, no. But something in the back of her mind truly thought that she might have been cursed for whatever reason… Shaking her head to rid herself of those thoughts, she soon arrived at the designated area, the famous "Red Lotus" restaurant. She raised a brow. This was quite an expensive restaurant, she mentally noted. This person might pack some gold if they arranged a date in one of the most expensive and delicious restaurants, and it was their first, and maybe only date if things went like they usually did. "Hey, you're just on time!" She heard a male voice. Turning, she saw a guy named "Yagami". Giving him a once-over, she couldn't complain. Despite the scar over his lip, the man was quite the eye-candy if she could say so herself. Yagami was tall, around 5'10, with mid-length, chestnut brown hair, now tied back in a slick ponytail. He was slightly tan and quite muscular, filling out the light blue dress shirt he wore along with a dark blue tie, that went well with some classic black pants and a belt, along with some classy sneakers to go with, instead of dress shoes. He pulled off "practical" and "casual" quite well together, Y/N noted. His usual beard was now well-trimmed, giving his sharp jaw more definition. The scar on his lip added a certain masculinity, no doubt working either as a shinobi or had retired from the field a long time ago. Y/n nodded and gave him a smile. "Hello." She gave the man a slight bow. "I hope I didn't keep you waiting." Yagami replied, his voice was deep, with a casual accent, which Y/n didn't mind at all.

"No, I just got here myself-" She blinked, caught off guard as the man took her hand and gently kissed her knuckles. This made the h/c woman blush slightly, but she smiled. "My, what a gentleman!" She complimented. "How can one not be, when they lie eyes upon such beauty?" Yagami replied, a soft look in his hazel eyes. This made Y/n giggle. "Oh, stop." She shook her head. "Shall we go in?" He offered her his arm. Y/n nodded eagerly and looked towards the entrance, taking the offered arm. "It's been a long time since I visited this place." She mused. "In fact, I hadn't been in this side of the town for a long time!" Yagami smiled. "Glad I got to be the one to bring you back around, then." He commented and asked for the register to lead them to their designated seat.

Y/n smiled. Maybe this date would turn out great, after all! After a while of talking and enjoying their dinner, the food being as top quality as she remembered it being, Y/n concluded that this man might be the one for her. He had similar interests as her. He loved cleaning and he worked as a merchant and a businessman. Everything was going well until her damned arm started itching again. It had been doing that for a whole week now and it became irritating. Of course, she tried taking anti-allergy pills, but nothing worked. She tried to focus on what Yagami was saying to her but her arm started quite literally burning. Unable to ignore the discomfort, she excused herself and rushed towards the bathroom, taking her purse along as calmly as she could. Once she got inside she locked the door, she poured cold water onto her burning arm. She groaned in pain. "Why did it have to act up now, of all the times?!" She complained quietly as her arm kept burning. Suddenly, she noticed some parts of her arm were turning black, which made her nearly freak out and slip. She caught herself in time and looked at the arm through the mirror with horror. There, forming slowly, was a black ink of…. gibberish, until it finally formed and set into place. "Hatake Kakashi" was written in cursive Japanese writing. She blinked…

A … Soulmate? That was the name of her soulmate…? The revelation made her scream at the top of her lungs. Lucky for her, the restaurant had a musical background, so hopefully nobody heard her anguished cry. "no, no, no, no…" She blinked and slapped her face a few times. "This can't be true… No…" She shook her head. Kakashi Hatake, once known as the "Hound" in the ANBU, then a skilled Jonin, now the freaking HOKAGE, for crying out loud, was her soulmate?! She furiously shook her head. This must have been some sort of universal joke, yes! She whimpered, curling up on the floor, sitting on her heels, and keeping the arm away from her as if it was infected with some sort of contagious disease. "Hatake Kakashi…" She uttered those words with a shaky tone. "This has got to be a joke…" She huffed out a laugh. She wanted to cry, scream, do... something! But all that came out was a silent, shaky breath. A knock was heard on the bathroom door and then, the voice of a woman rang out in a polite manner. "Miss, are you alright? i heard screaming…" The woman said through the door, concerned.

Forcing herself back to reality, she sniffled and called out. "Yes, i'm fine! I just… Dropped my expensive perfume bottle!" Y/n replied. "Oh, alright!" The woman replied. Y/n heard the shuffling and clinking of heels disappearing down the halls. She got up and looked at herself in the mirror with a frown before shaking her head. "No, I won't let this ruin my date!" She called out with determination. Quickly fixing her makeup and smoothing out her dress, she put on her signature perfume and gave herself a smirk. "You got, this girl!" She told herself quietly, before leaving the restroom. She arrived back at her seat and sat down. "My apologies. I heard my phone buzzing. Work called." She smiled at Yagami, who was looking at her in a concerted manner. His features relaxed. "Is that so? I hope everything is alright." He replied. Y/n nodded. "Yes. They had just got a new stock delivery and had to notify me since I am both the manager and the cook." She chuckled. The man nodded, understanding. "Ah, yes. I understand that. It can be tough to juggle two things at once along with having a social life." He said, to which Y/n nodded. "Quite." After exchanging a few words, the two stood up. Yagami had insisted on paying for the dinner and they went on a walk. He escorted her back home.

Y/n smiled as she opened the door. "Thank you… For today. It was great." She said softly, looking at the handsome man. Yagami nodded and took her hand, kissing it gently. "Of course. I had fun as well. We should do this again if you're up for it…" He looked at her. Y/n nodded. "I will text you when I'm free. I'm sure you're quite the busy one, yourself." She replied to which Yagami agreed with silently. "It has been quite the busy year, especially with holidays around the corner." He mused, before slowly backing up, releasing his warm hands from hers, slipping. With a smile, he bid her goodnight. "Sleep well, my dear." That brought a blush to Y/n's cheeks and she nodded. "Good night!". She watched Yagami turn and walk away before she entered her house and turned on the lights. Closing the door, she sighed, leaning on the door after locking it. She bit her lip and stared up at the ceiling in thought. "What a night…" She mumbled. What a night, indeed. She hadn't had such a date in quite some time, yet the words on her arm still somehow burned, reminding her that they were there. Frowning, she went into her room to gather her toiletries and headed towards the bathroom to take a nice, relaxing bath. Hopefully, all would go well on the next date. But somewhere in the back of her mind, Y/n L/n couldn't help but wonder about this soulmate of hers. Little did she know things would take a turn for a remarkable set of events from then on.

[paneerlajwanti]

*clangs bowl* heeramandi review gogo styles pls uparwala bhala karega

love being a hater (brainrot) with an inkling for the arts

sonakshi is practically the only thing keeping it together. i continued past episode one because she raised one eyebrow aur meri patloon dheeli ho gayi. the grace and fierce screen presence she has is absolutely amazing. im so so so here for sonakshi sinha dark grey role that plays to her strengths. bandi me kya bawaal machaya

bhansali chacha apne niece ko dhang se direction karein bas yahi khwaish hai meri. my god she has the exact same expression for every single life event (and this show has SO MANY fucking things happening. she really has an ipad face good lord. matlab poker face for everything? and i thought slb was a perfectionist of a 100 takes.

manisha koirala is an absolute dagger in a gorgeous sheath. sirf uska character actually sochke likha hai, like not just with short term, immediate gratification.

aditi my ex-roman empire.... girlie she finally did more than a pretty face and im feeling so vindicated. why doesn't she do more of this ughhhh. im so here for richa chaddha ka cameo. kya dhamaka mast. beautiful beautiful beautiful!!!

slb really loves to flaunt his knowledge and expertise in the realm of aesthetics, but even that feels very umbrella like. if you're doing pre-independence era, there's like SO much to world building (the concrete infrastructural kind) that wasn't even given much consideration. and like yes this show about heeramandi, but there's definitely more to lahore in the 1920s to 40s than a sepia filtered marketplace with everyone in anarkalis and a few antique things to make it a set.

the plot is quite predictable but it serves it's purpose. every episode seems to be written to be character centric. i still end up longing for more. im obviously not an expert in the field, but he really does love to romanticize the fuck out of being a tawaif but at the same time keep tragedying them. im pretty sure muslims wouldn't live, talk, walk, dress and impress the way he's done it....

bro (bhansali) really needs to be shaken. it's very interesting when u let him cook (marinate).

[yes0another0outsiders0blog]

SFW Alphabet : Ponyboy Curtis

Should I have aged Pony up for this? Maybe. Was I over halfway done writing this before I realized that with no desire to rewrite any of it? Absolutely. Did I give a few cheap "idk, man, he's like 14" answers on some of these? Uh, yeah, sorry 'bout that--

Mention of substance abuse/dependency in "ugly."

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Insanely, whenever he can be. Always wants a hug, always wants to hold hands. Incredibly lovey. He's 14, it's probably his first relationship, he is a reader and writer that watches sunsets so you know he romanticizes the hell out of every little thing.

The gang teases Pony a LOT for how affectionate he is with you and then he usually gets all embarrassed about it and gets all weird about pda for a while. Thinks that everyone is just jealous and nobody has ever been this in love and they just don't understand, really he's just easy to make fun of because he's a kid in his first relationship and he's really cringe and awkward about it.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Y'all most likely met at school, did a group project together or something and obviously he's such a sweetie that you weren't not going to be his friend.

You guys become quick friends, you're probably his best school friend instantly (because you actually have classes with him unlike anyone in the gang that's still in school), he'll always sit next to you. Constantly defending each other if anyone talks shit, he takes you to the movies and you two watch sunsets together because no one else cares to do that kind of stuff with him, you go to every track meet to support him and if you're in a club/sport you can bet your ass he's always there to support you. SUPER wholesome besties.

You also have to be his street smarts and basic common sense, though, because this boy has none. He'll go to do anything or open his mouth to say something naieve and you'll have to, like, grab his sleeve and say "now, let's actually think about that, buddy" because otherwise he's saying some r/im14andthisisdeep bullshit that will get him beaten to a pulp just for being annoying, or he'll start on some crazy ungrateful rant about how Darry should be a better guardian and you need to knock some fucking sense into him because absolutely not.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Loves to cuddle, but doesn't get to often. Darry is pretty strict about Ponyboy keeping his bedroom door wide open when you're there or (preferably) sticking to the living room or kitchen, so cuddling at home is a no-go. Obviously, cuddling is difficult at school too because, uh, teachers.

Sometimes you two will go out to the lot or skip a class and head out to the bleachers to lay in the grass and cuddle. Usually, it's very simple. Sitting next to each other with someone's head on the other's shoulder and arms around each other. One of you on your back and the other with their head nuzzled into their chest or neck. Kind of minimal touching, as far as cuddling goes.

He's afraid he'll be hormonal if the cuddling is too intense, lol.

Sometimes, when you two are in the lot, Darry *will* catch you guys but let it slide because, again, it's very minimal touching and could almost be platonic.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Good at cleaning. Doesn't really like cleaning, but would rather get it over with than live in a dirty space, so it would get done even if Darry wasn't there to constantly harp on him to do his damn chores. Does need the reminders because he'll honest to god forget about the dishes in the sink or whatever, but does them right when he does remember them.

Fine at cooking. Capable of reading a recipe, doesn't have the skill or experience to add on or better it. Does the basics, wouldn't be against learning more, but just hasn't really had the chance/need to yet.

Wants to settle down eventually. Sees himself having a pretty traditional/basic life. College, married, house, kids, that kind of stuff.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

Would do anything to avoid a break-up. Ends up distancing himself and hoping you break up with him over it. Doesn't want to hurt you, ends up hurting you more than if he just sat down and talked to you about splitting up. If you don't take the hint and dump him he'll probably hand you a note in the hallway and leave SO fast so he doesn't have to do it face-to-face.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Again, overly romanticizes. Thinks that when he loves somebody it's the truest love to ever be felt by anyone. Is instantly daydreaming about the future. Ponyboy is big on commitment, but he's young so it's all an "eventually" type of thing. Y'all probably have legit promise rings a year in.

Just smart enough (that's a lie, it's because Darry said so) to decide to wait for actual marriage until he actually graduates and has a stable job instead of the second y'all are both 18 like he originally planned.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

SO gentle. Especially physically, treats you so good. Emotionally, he's really gentle but can get really socially unaware and ends up saying something stupid way too often because he just genuinely doesn't see/consider the issue with whatever he said. But the kid TRIES.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Loves hugs. Will hug you goodbye every single time you go to leave. Will give you a congratulatory hug if you achieve anything. He's physically pretty sensory seeking, he likes holding onto things.

Hugs are usually fairly short and sweet, though. Very warm and nice, but if it goes on for too long then he feels a bit awkward. Like, he doesn't know what to do with his hands after a while and starts to worry that you're uncomfortable, he spends way too much mental energy thinking about the most appropriate hug length.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

On the second date. The first date is so casual and very mutual-crush-besties, but after he just thinks about you and how much he's fallen for you. On the second date, he's basically instantly confessing his love and asking if you want to be in an official relationship.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Average amount of jealousy. No issue with you having friends or anything. Only gets really jealous when someone is getting flirty with you or you start paying an extreme amount of attention to someone.

Gets really moody when jealous, may not even realize he is jealous. A lot of "no, it's fine" and shit. Irritable, usually isolates or vents to someone else.

He apologizes when someone informs him that he's being a jealous jerk, though. Again, he usually doesn't clock the feeling so he has no idea he's doing it.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Quick, sweet, a bit shy. A peck on the cheek or a quick brush of the lips. He'd probably get in trouble for it at school with teachers and at home with Darry, or most of the rest of the gang will tease you two RELENTLESSY anytime they catch you two, so kisses are super sneaky and the types that you can pull away from real quick.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Neither loves nor dislikes children, doesn't really know what to do with kids. He's the youngest person he's around most of the time, he would be so confused if you just plopped a kid down in front of him. Would probably be really good with a quiet, "good" kid, he'd love to read to them or babysit one of those kids that just, like, sit in the corner and draw or quietly play with toys for hours. The second a kid starts being super hyper or rambunctious, though, he'd be so overwhelmed and need an adult *RIGHT* now.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Y'all meet up at school and spend as much time together as possible before the bell rings. Studying for first period, chatting about upcoming plans or the day before, etc.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

A hug and a kiss goodbye at your door, lol. You think you're spending the night? You think he's allowed to spend the night at your place? C'mon, now.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Pretty open when it's relevant. Like, if asked a direct question he isn't going to lie and he doesn't really have an issue talking about himself. As soon as he sees you as a safe person that won't make fun of him for it, he's deep-diving into how he feels about almost everything to get your perspective. A lot of the gang either doesn't care to listen or will make fun of him for being a little bitch, so Ponyboy will absolutely latch on to someone willing to listen to his random emotional and philosophical bullshit.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Gets moody or frustrated easily, stresses easily and may need a break from whatever is getting to him. But actually angry? Slightly below average. There are things that will absolutely push those buttons quick enough, but he isn't actually angry so much as overwhelmed a fair amount of the time.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Remembers a surprising amount of little things. Your favorite and least favorite colors? Foods? Books? Movies? Etc? Absolutely remembers all of them. Might forget bigger things, like your birthday or something. And it isn't like he even forgets!! He just has that weird "is time real?" anxiety that some people have. Like "I know their birthday is on [date], and it's [date] today, but is it *REALLY* [date]??? What if I say happy birthday and they're confused and tell me it isn't their birthday? Maybe I should wait for someone else to tell them happy birthday first, just to be safe..."

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Your second date. Eating at the diner where he told you he loved you and asked you to be his officially, watching the sunset, catching a late movie, and then walking you home and giving you a hug and kiss goodbye at the door.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Around average on the protective scale? Wants to know you're safe, obviously. If anyone is bothering you, he's by your side. If anyone is actively bullying you, Ponyboy will try to get the whole gang to defend you (and if anything serious is going on, they probably will). Will listen to you vent and rant, and (maybe reluctantly) accepts that you can take care of yourself. Will follow your lead mostly, stays close and will happily defend you if you look to him.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Tries so hard. Writes love letters, makes sure there's plenty to do on dates (it's never *just* a movie, it's dinner and a movie and talking for hours after), buys you a little gift or treat whenever he has spending money, helps you with school work whenever you need it, walks you home even if it's way out of the way for him.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Extremely addictive personality. He is canonly the heaviest smoker of the group despite also being the youngest, also considers himself addicted to pepsi and--while that could absolutely just be an exaggeration in saying it's his favorite drink--I wouldn't be surprised if he was fairly addicted to the caffeine. He also misuses prescriptions. Having problems with addiction early in life can lead to more issues with addiction later down the line, whether through stronger substance dependency/abuse or just addictive behaviors such as gambling or similar.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

About as much as a young teen is expected to be. Has a good plenty look-based insecurities, definitely wants to look tuff or whatever. Doesn't make it his whole thing. Also probably grows out of it fairly completely unlike some people.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

110% yes. This is true love to him. Yall are soul mates.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Don't know if this is obvious in how I write him, but I headcanon him as autistic (because I'm autistic and I say so, idk). Not diagnosed, because it's the 60s.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Not seeing (or at least trying to see) his point of view. He can be rather emotionally driven sometimes, and it does help when he has someone to give an objective or logical perspective when he's like that, but if you don't start with "yeah, I understand where your coming from, but also consider..." then he'll feel like you're just telling him he's wrong and his feelings don't matter. A lack of sympathy/empathy (idk which, I lack both, oops) is a good way to make him uncomfortable with you as a whole.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Sleeps holding onto something for dear life. A pillow, balling up the blankets next to him, partner, whatever.

[anewkindofme]

What’s the argument that Dean is more of a mom than Sam’s father, if I may ask? Sorry, I just gush over character interpretations from other users!!

I think Dean radiates maternal energy vs paternal. This does go back into the basic gender roles that are set long ago, but I think for the time that Dean and Sam were growing up, it translates. When Dean gets into Mary's head he says...

For 4 years, Dean grew up with both parents. We see in the "road to heaven" episode that John would often disappear for a couple of days, leaving Mary alone with the boys. Therefore, she was the one cooking meals, comforting them when they were hurt or sick, doing the most care for Sam.

Of course, fathers can (and should) do these things. However, I find it interesting that Dean says he had to be both mom and dad. Because the Winchester family fell into those matriarchal and patriarchal roles. And in these dynamics, the mom is almost always the true superhero. The one who makes the magic. Maybe some aren't working or the primary breadwinner, but they're the ones that get shit done. They're the real ones shaping the kids. Which is just what Mary did.

Dean stepped up into her shoes. Not John's. We have several references and even see him feeding Sam. Fixing him up when he's hurt (the knock knock jokes). Making sure he got to bed, did his homework, etc. He made the magic and raised Sam into the man he was. John would step in and help at certain points. But as John writes in his own diary (which I've only read excerpts of), he wasn't the one raising him.

Dean was extremely parentified. But he was pushed into the role that the family was suddenly lacking. While I believe John was a better father before Mary died, he was still not very present. He was there to play with the kids and provide. But not do the day to day. Dean says "it (Mary & John's marriage) was only perfect after she died". Telling us that things weren't great. Dean romanticized it so Sam wouldn't hate John more than he already did and so he'd have an image of a "perfect family to cling to". When Mary died, John needed a mother for Sam as well as a father to patch up the holes as he didn't have it in him to do the bare minimum anymore.

There's also hints in the "road to heaven" episode that Dean was already parentified back then. He comforts his mother (and as this is a memory, we know this isn't just Adult!Dean trying to comfort her). Sam says Dean was cleaning up John's messes from Day 1. I don't think it was to the extent that it'd become, but even from a young age, Dean was acting as the husband Mary needed. Then she died and he became the wife John needed.

I hope I'm explaining myself well. Because I'm sure this can come across as a misogynistic point of vew. As I said, men should do all of these things day to day. And now, in 2024, there have been leaps and bounds of fathers doing all the mothers do.

But Dean was born in 1979. Sam came along in 1983 and Mary died the same year. Things were different during this time. Fathers weren't taking on these roles.

I don't think Sam thinks too hard about what role Dean took on. He's just a second parent. But clearly, Dean recognizes that he took on that motherhood role. Because that's what the family needed. It shouldn't have fallen on him, but it did.

Thanks for listening to my rambles! I hope they make sense, haha.

[this-witch-writes]

I was think about steddie and that post going around about "intangible love" and the romanticism of unspoken acts of affection and the replies show how differently people react to that.

Part 1 (Show Don't Tell)

part 2, part 3

Steve Harrington's parents are distant (always emotionally and usually geographically) his only serious girlfriend wouldn't say she loved him, and most of his friendships were either surface macho things or a bunch of literal children. He loves Robin and they talk, they do, but she's not exactly mushy either. That actually is fine with her and the kids, but it's not what he's hoping for in a relationship.

Eddie’s parents said they loved him, said they wanted what was best for him, but it was just words. The person who actually loved him, who cared, who showed up when it mattered, hardly ever said much at all. Wayne knew how to make love understood. His uncle didn't have to say he loved him it was obvious with the hours he worked, how he hadn’t hesitated to make space for Eddie, to listen to him, and never ask him to change. Wayne always paid attention to his likes and dislikes, and Eddie thinks that kind is real love.

After spring break, Eddie was pleasantly shocked by the level of care Steve showed people around him, in those little actions that meant everything. Eddie gets so swept up in how Steve makes him feel that he doesn't even realise that Steve thinks that Eddie made the first move.

Steve had known he liked Eddie and tried to look out for him after spring break, but he was surprised when the guy kissed him. It was nice though, nice to be wanted, nice to be the one pursued and not doing the pursuing. It made him feel more confident than he had in a long time. He doesn't worry about the rest of it. When Eddie never wants to talk about how he feels, what him and Steve are to each other, Steve doesn't love it but he figures that Eddie just needs time.

It doesn't get better with time, it gets worse.

They've been dating for six months and Eddie wants to be over the moon. Steve is amazing and sweet and hot. They have so much fun together, but Eddie doesn't know why nothing he does is enough to show Steve that he cares. He notices the little things, favourite foods and flowers, times a joke goes too far with the kids and Eddie shuts them down. Eddie knows he's paying attention, but Steve still constantly questions it, asking how Eddie feels like he’s not bending over backwards to show it? He just wants to feel like he's enough.

Steve is lost. He can't make sense of Eddie. He's so caring, so attentive, and the way he acts... it can't just be casual to him, can it? But it took four months for Eddie to use the word boyfriend and only when repeatedly asked. He hasn't said he loves him.

Steve did.

Five months in, riding the high of Eddie saying “boyfriend” instead of using vague hand-gestures to define their relationship. Steve had been stressed from work and got soaked in the November rain only to come home to Eddie cooking him a beautiful dinner.

'I love you, Eds.'

Eddie smiled big and bright and kissed him. They kept kissing and it wasn't until the next morning that Steve realized Eddie hadn't said it back.

Steve waited a week before saying it again. Eddie seem happy to hear it, not uncomfortable, all smiles and kisses and promises to pick Steve up after work but... no I love you. Steve kept trying for a few weeks but eventually he stopped. He told himself that it was fine, he could wait, but he missed that feeling from the start, so confident that he was wanted.  

Eddie knew Steve had been a bit quiet through the winter. He knew that he was missing Robin away at college, that the kids were busy, and that the holidays were tough for a lot of people with shitty parents. But he was still blindsided when he asked what was wrong and Steve looked him in the face and asked if Eddie loved him.

Did he love him? That hurt. How could Steve even ask that?

'Nothing's ever going to be good enough for his highness, is it?' He snapped at him, determined not to show how close to crying he was. He was just so tired. He’d been working all hours trying to save up so him and Steve could leave Hawkins and it was still not enough.

Steve blinked back at his boyfriend, the second person he'd loved who just refused him this most basic part of a relationship, who just couldn't seem to choke out the words even to humour him. Heartbroken and speechless, Steve walked the rest of the way home.

The next day Eddie worried. He'd expected Steve to call that night to make up, Eddie was big enough to admit that Steve was better at reaching out first to apologise. Eddie was good at words, descriptions, stories, but putting words to the messiness of emotions, not so much. When Steve didn't call Eddie decided that he'd been too harsh. So what if Steve was a little insecure sometimes? Eddie adored everything else about him, he was allowed to have a flaw. He drove to Steve's but no one answered. He had a key though and so let himself in

Downstairs was as empty as usual but Eddie got anxious when he saw a lot of Steve's things were missing from his room. There was a note on the desk on his desk he was too scared to read. Maybe Steve had been too upset to talk and needed to write it now for Eddie to understand.

'Eddie, I nearly couldn't go, but this isn't fair to either of us. I hope you find someone someday that you love as much I love you now, someone you love enough to get past whatever's holding you back. yours, Steve.'

Eddie didn't understand at all.

-

Continue: part 2, part 3

[linkspooky]

Given what you've said about Gojo and his loneliness paired with his "unlimited strength", would you say Sukuna feels similar? I feel like on one hand Sukuna revels in being able to do whatever he wants and he seems to have a general disdain or at least apathy towards humans and their suffering. Yet recently Gege has implied Sukuna himself is lonely too.

I already answered a question like this here.

However, to speculate a little further I think rather than the companionship that Gojo craved from people like Geto and his own students, Sukuna wants to be challenged?

It's a big ambiguous I can't say that Sukuna wants to be defeated or surpassed because in the fight against Yorozu he says that defeat is the same as death for him.

He also doesn't really show a lot of respect for Gojo the one person who has a shot at surpassing him. He continually insists that Gojo is just a nobody who happened to be born in an era where he wasn't around, and does everything to "strip the scales off of " Gojo so to speak to prove he's no one special. Despite the narrative insisting Gojo is the one person who has a shot of understanding what Sukuna's perspective is like.

Sukuna's entire cursed techniqueis based around cooking / eating though, and the one time we do see him give his respect to someone it's to Jogo who gave his all in a fight even though he lost in the end.

I think rather than companionship, Sukuna is chasing some nebulous feeling of astifaction. He wants a challenge even if it's one he's going to win in the end. Which is why he uses cooking metaphors when fighting his opponents, he breaks them down slowly before eventually consuming them whole.

Twitter user Lightning446 pointed out that Sukuna used the line "enchant me" in the recent chapter, the same line he used when fighting Megumi for the first time in Yuji's body.

Yorozu's words may have a romantic context, but Sukuna and Gojo seem to have interpretated them in a different context. The only thing in Sukuna's life that matters to him is Jujutsu so, Sukuna having some capital R romanticism in regards to practitioning of Jujutsu as an art and pushing it to further and further levels makes sense, because that's all that gives his existence meaning. For Sukuna it's less being lonely at the top and more being unchallenged.

He wants to feel like he's earned his place at the top. If we ever learn his backstory I wouldn't be surprised if he was different from Gojo who just happened to be born the strongest with inheriting the six-eyes and limited at the same time. If Sukuna genuinely climbed up to the top unlike Gojo then that might explain his difference in perspective.

[cupidevanesco]

Boris Pavlikovsky as your boyfriend. (headcannons) + SFW

Now before you read this, let me just remind you that this isn't sunshine and rainbows. We're talking Boris Pavlikovsky, a teen drug addict with trauma, so don't come for me for “romanticizing” abuse. Thanks!

Warnings: Abuse, trauma, manipulation, and usage of drugs.

Sometimes asks you to do things for him, including stealing; solely just to test your limits and how far you'd go for him.

Argues with you for the smallest reasons, but it doesn't take long before he absolutely loses his shit and starts begging and asking for forgiveness.

+ Whenever this happens, he always cries. ALWAYS. He hugs you from behind and buries his head on the crook of your neck despite being taller than you, then starts gaslighting you then and there so that you don't get mad anymore.

Whiny. “Wiesz, że nie to miałem na myśli, kochanie,” / “You know I didn't mean it, love,”

Whenever he's having a bad day, he'd take it out on you by giving you drugs for some reason. If you didn't take it, he'd force pills down your throat. Whenever this happens, you'd threaten to leave the house and he wouldn't care, in fact he's pushing you even more to leave.

Not a minute after you leave the house, you have 109 missed calls and over 576 texts from him begging you to come back and that he's worried and sorry for what he's done. He only does this whenever you leave the house after an argument, he never actually message or call you.

If you're not home by night, he'd go looking for you without even trying to call or message you. He always knows where you're at.

Despite being a ridiculously and relatively horrible person, he still manages to spoil you rotten when it comes to gift giving. He mostly just steals though, but you appreciate it. The first time you started dating, you told him not to steal if he's gonna gift you anything because you don't need it, but he didn't listen and you've grown to get used to it.

You're his personal therapist, but being his personal therapist makes you want to see your own therapist.

Whenever he relapses, he becomes all quiet and clingy. He'd always hold your arm or kiss the top of your hand, tug on your shirt whenever you're cooking in the kitchen, and becomes the little spoon when cuddling at night, all while frowning.

You're stuck with him. Leaving him means slowly killing yourself. He'd somehow planted this seed into your mind that you'd feel so bored and unloved if he wasn't by your side. You ALWAYS come back.

You've tried healing and breaking up with him multiple times but he just never lets it happen. He forces himself to not sleep, to look tired, wear the same clothes three days a row, and make himself look haggard in general just for you to pity him and come crawling back to him. He likes to make you think he's wrapped around your finger, but he really isn't. It's the whole other way around.

He insults every guy you used to like/date to you whenever he doesn't know what to talk about or when he's bored.

Gets jealous VERY easily. You can't even order in a damn restaurant just because he's jealous, so he does it all the time.

He surprisingly takes you on cute little dates like star gazing, picnics, a walk in cute places and such whenever he's having a good day/week.

You like to pick out his clothes for him because he's sometimes too lazy to actually create an outfit and not just grab the first thing his hand feels in his closet.

He made your parents think that he's a good person somehow. They love him.

Likes to speak different languages at once because he thinks it's funny to see you getting offended upon not understanding a shit he's saying.

Big baby narcissist. He hurt you, you reacted to him, therefore now he is the victim.

He loves your cooking.

He made a letter for you in ukrainian, a really long one, but he knew you couldn't understand ukrainian. That's exactly why he wrote it in that language.

Half of your refrigerator is filled with vodka and energy drinks while the other half are vegetables and fruits. You always cook healthy food just because you're scared that he might die from kidney failure.

You provide for him. You never complained about it though, and he never really asks for much. Although he did steal about thirty bucks from you once just to buy snacks.

When you get into a BIG argument, he actually hurts you. He shoves you into a wall, slaps you, punches you — mostly in your lower stomach, pulls your hair and such. He won't stop unless he sees a bruise.

He locks you in a room, mostly your basement, and he turns the lights off with nothing inside. You'd be banging so hard on the door but his pride is too high for him to open the door for you. You got the cops called on you multiple times but you always covered for him despite having a whole fight, and he'd say sorry and be guilty and all that.

He never thought of cheating.

He can't show love through words and he gets all shy whenever you do. You love spoiling him with words because that's only the ever time he's soft.

He's a horrible man, but he's a vulnerable boy. He can't take the topic of his parents, it upsets him.

He once got jealous of you because your parents “cared for you too much” ...they were average parents.

Whenever he gets too drunk, he starts crying and rambling about how much he hates his parents and how he's not useless. He tries to prove it to you and it just breaks your heart to see it. He gets so vulnerable and reaches his breaking point, he'd have full on panic attacks, fall asleep after, and wake up the next day going on with his day like nothing happened.

He doesn't like it when you see him vulnerable so he distracts you from it but it never really works on you. You just pretend that it does so that he won't overdo whatever he's distracting you with.

Admitted that he in fact did love you a lot when you had a heart to heart. You just spent all your time hugging and comforting him after this.

You try your best to understand him but you rarely ever do. He's misunderstood and will always will be.

He doesn't try to make people understand him because doing that would need the mention of his parents. He still can't bring himself to talk about them.

You took psychology for college just so you could become a psychologist after you graduate and be his own personal therapist. You never wanted to be one, but seeing that people like him existed made you want to.

No matter how bad your day is, if he's being sweet, you'd force yourself to act nice to him because he's barely ever sweet.

He loves you :)

Hope you guys enjoyed this! I take requests, just not NSFW. I'm getting bored, so y'all should really start requesting while I'm at it. 🤷

[scum-belina]

Haven't even gotten my second paycheck yet and my mom's already hitting me up to buy things she should be buying instead. Ever since I was born I was her mother. She refuses to even drive herself so she cannot do anything without me. I'm so weary.

She's a great pal, but never a great mother. Getting her to do the bare minimum responsibilities is like pulling teeth. We keep getting into fights now that we're working together. Never at work but once we're home there's no peace.

She also seems to be conflicted where she's like, super proud of how liked I am by everyone and my work ethic, but kind of angry too? it's like she thinks I'm outdoing her even tho she's been there 7 years. She is the same way about the fact I make a little more money than her too.

She says she wants the best for me and for me to have my own life, but her needing me to be around for her to do anything tells me she's lying. She also has been almost psychotically losing it on me telling me I'm self-centered when I mention the abuse my dad put me through and that "it wasn't all bad, you just CHOOSE to be negative"

literally the only reason she loved my dad and romanticizes him so much is because he told her if she married him she'd never have to drive or work again. She was a SAHM but basically just laid around eating and playing video games for 19 years. She barely cleaned and resented cooking at all. I remember as a kid trying to ask her how to clean and cook so she wouldn't have to anymore because she would get so angry when she'd have to.

She now actually admits she was wrong for being that way all those years, but is like "I'm not like that anymore I have a job now so why are you bullying me about the past?" When I was calmly trying to explain how she affected me during my developmental years. I just can't win.

When my dad was diagnosed with a rare form of lymphoma, my mom ran to ME freaking out and depending on me and putting everything on my shoulders to deal with. I had to be the strong one. And it's been that way ever since. She loves to compare me to my dad all the time and it makes me want to die.

I've had such a broken life. I'm surrounded by the ones who have hurt me most and continue to. I still care. I still try to appease them. But when I start to show visible signs of my depression or cptsd, I am told I'm just narcissistic and abusive bc being around me when I'm really down and struggling is upsetting. It's mainly my mother who tells me that.

Idk guys, there's so much more in my life that is just embarrassingly awful I can't even go into it. I'm trying my best to fight like hell while being in my own personal hell. But it's so hard. I'm grateful to finally be making somewhat decent money, but I feel like it's all for nothing and that my end is inevitable in the near future. Please pray for me.

[seriousfic]

Since this is an occasional X-Men blog, wanted to give my thoughts on recent Nightcrawler business.

I wouldn't mind it if it were in movieverse or Ultimate continuity, some alternate timeline like that. Mystique is always going to be Kurt's mother and Destiny is her usual love interest, so it makes a certain amount of sense, even though I don't really see what it adds to the plot aside from weirdness for the sake of weirdness.

(And Kurt's origin always has to feature Mystique tossing his baby self off a cliff, so romanticizing his conception just makes Mommy seem more unhinged. That's not only her child, it's the child she had with the love of her life? Why would Destiny ever talk to her again? Does she not give a shit about HER kid?)

Thing is, trying to keep the Azazel stuff in just makes it stupider, a bit like undoing Slut!Gwen by saying that Norman actually banged a very good special effect Mysterio cooked up. And I think in Spider-Man, there's a logic to reversing Sins Past because it's an elephant in the room for any conversation involving Gwen or Norman (or even MJ, since she kept it a secret).

The Azazel business was dumb, but I don't know if it was so dumb as to be worth retconning it but trying to keep it halfway canon. That kind of Xorneto "yes, someone who looked like Professor X did those things, but it wasn't OUR Professor X, but those things still happened..."

It seems dumber than just memory-holing the whole business. Maybe dismissing it in the next soft reboot. And I think they only went there to do some weird trans message for the vocal minority that are obsessed with that shit.

Does make me wonder, if Mystique can turn into Azazel and bang a woman and have a son with Azazel's power, does that mean she can turn into any Omega-level mutant, bang a chick, and have a kid who wins the superpower lottery? Or maybe turn into Storm, get banged as Storm, and pop out a kid with Storm's powers? What's the limit on this? Can she turn into Thor and have an Odin-force baby? We know she's not moral enough to turn her nose up at running a mutant puppy mill...

[studywgabi]

18th Birthday

I've been thinking that maybe I should just do it. All of it. Cheat on cappucinos, have a torrid affair with herbal tea. Exercise. Even 45-step skincare routines. Journal. "Practice gratitude." (Good God). Even if just to cross it off my list.

But I've never been that kind of person. Health is performative and foreign to me. It's almost frightening. I've always been too busy drowning to bother with trying to swim. I wouldn't even know how to go about being alive in a way that makes sense. But I am moving out soon (but not soon enough), so if there's a time to do it, it's now.

I mock health because I'm envious. I want to be a real person, but it's easier to romanticize pain by calling it being adorably messy or a work-in-progress. It's all I've ever known. I hate who I am.

Makeup isn't fun for me. Skincare isn't fun. Everything showers aren't my idea of a good time, or something I do to relax, or "me time." Trying to transform what has always been horrifically ugly into something passably presentable is work, yet another exhausting task to add to my never-ending to-do list. But besides all the expensive products and pressure, I need to start actually cooking real adult meals. I need to be less pathetic. I need to be kinder. I need to be honest. I need to read more. I need to watch more movies. I need to pet my dog more and spend more time with my parents and write more. I need to learn how to take care of myself.

But at this point, I'm not worth the effort. I just can't justify the work. I'm 18 and all of the stupid things old people tell me won't matter in a few years are my current lived, endured reality. Knowing I'll have different (probably worse) issues that even older people will belittle in a few years doesn't help me right now.

Yes, I care about silly high school milestones. I'm not going to be valedictorian. I failed and dropped several classes. I wasn't student body president. I've spent my whole life here and I'm so terrified I'll die here. I went to a regular public high school in Bumfuck, WA and I'm going to a public, in-state (of course) university (in an even smaller town) with a 98% acceptance rate, to major in something I don't believe in, I'm not interested in, and that will get me 28,000 a year. I'm not exceptional, or interesting, or good in any way. I have no talents; I've spent the past four years rotting in my bedroom with foil over the windows. And I'm not happy. School is my whole life; I don't have anything else going on. My main thrill in life is doing laundry. I'm not going to homecoming. I'm not going to prom. I'm still a virgin. I never drank. I never went to a party. I didn't use my time in high school wisely, nor did I have any fun. Sure, things could get better from now on. But my experiences up until this point are set in stone. I've aged out of so much. I've missed summer@brown. I've missed Washington Week. I've missed the national merit scholarship. I've missed friends. Boyfriends. I have nothing to show for my childhood. I don't know how to move on. I don't know how to get over what I lost. God, I hate how fucking whiny I sound complaining about nothing.

I guess I wish my parents wanted more for me, pushed me harder. I love them, but I can't condone their complete complacency. They're not disappointed in what I've become at all. They're so completely okay with my failure. I love them, but they don't hate me enough and that kills me.

I thought it fitting this post should be so fucking late. My birthday is January 30. I wish it was in August, so I could always be the youngest in my class (disgusting). It's just it all piles on together. Thanksgiving (freshman fifteen), fall quarter finals, Christmas, New Year's (and it's dreaded resolutions), birthday (an old biddy with cataracts and arthritis), and then, the cherry on top, fucking Valentine's Day.

God, I hate this girl. She's so annoying and stupid and pathetic. She talks about herself in the third person. It's because I want to distance myself as much as possible. Be not here and not this.

I want to be a teenage girl, just like everybody else. But I'm more of a middle-aged alcoholic man. I don't think being a mentally stable adult is in the cards for me, but I think it can get better than this. I hope it can.

Mmm. I'm getting notes of dirt and gasoline from this tea. Yummy. Cheers, darlings! Here's to being less shitty.

[struggle-but-its-all-ocean-floor]

Well... this has hit me like a freight train. Jungkook and jimin seemed particularly down, which makes sense. Being the only ones left must hit harder, but thankfully they're together because I certainly wouldn't want to be the last one. I thought there was a chance that jungkook would take more of tae's approach and try to look forward to the physical challenge since he seems to like things like that but no it's just general suckiness all around. I feel like I'm entering a period of mourning

They didn't seem that down to me - just the normal amount? I think they were sad/self-conscious about shaving their hair off. Jungkook was pretty sad about not being able to talk to Army. I think he's come to rely on us a lot.

I get what you mean because Jungkook likes challenges, and I'm sure he'll give it his all and even find some enjoyment in it, but the military just sucks. Jungkook is sweet. He likes cooking, doing the laundry, drinking, touring Korean restaurants, singing and dancing, hanging out with friends, talking to Army, wearing beanies and oversized clothes... He can't do any of it now. He just lost all his favorite things. It's the same for Jimin and any man. They all lost their lives. What's there to be excited about tbh?

For some reason, V built anticipation around enlisting - it seems cool to him, and it's not surprising given that "mainly" and "patriotic" shit like that can get so romanticized -, and that's good because it means he wasn't as scared or sad as everyone else, but I know it's still gonna suck for him. And I'm sure he was aware of that but chose to focus on the positive. Tbh V reminded me of when I thought knee surgery would be a walk in the park only to have a rude awakening afterwad.

Jungkook is really strong though. I think he looked sadder saying goodbye to Army because, just like losing BTS is a nightmare to us, losing us is a nightmare to BTS...

It still doesn't seem real now. I wonder how he and Jimin are doing. I hope they can hug each other close at night, but probably not. At least the food seems okay, and Jungkookie got to take his skincare products with him!

I miss my babies already. But we'll be okay! It's nice to see Army coming together again. It's the first time since chapter 2 that it's all about OT7.

Thanks for the ask! If you feel sad and want to talk, I'm here <3

[sleepy-bunbun-ace]

twst incorrect quotes but it's just my various yuu ocs (plus twst ocs). just a warning, this'll be a long one.

yume asta:

Yume Asta: Hey, Ace? Can I get some dating advice? Ace: Just because I’m with Deuce doesn’t mean I know how I did it.

--

Yume Asta: If Ace and I were drowning, who would you save? Deuce: You two can’t swim? Ace: It’s a hypothetical question, Deuce! who would you save? Deuce: my time and effort.

--

*The group is getting into the car* Yume Asta: I’m driving. Alexander Goldenheart, out of view: Shotgun! Sue Times, turning to face Alexander G: Aww! But you had it on the way here- Everyone except Alexander G: WOAH- Alexander G, holding a shotgun: No! I found a shotgun! And I want the front seat! *Pumps gun*

--

Yume Asta: If I accidentally sat on a voodoo doll of myself, would I be trapped forever in that position, doomed to starve to death? Alexander G: How am I supposed to know? Sue Times: You say, as if we don’t use you as a source of knowledge of the occult. Alexander G: *sighs* Alexander G: You wouldn't be trapped.

--

Yume Asta, holding a python: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him Riddle: You did WHAT– Epel: William Snakepeare

--

Yume Asta: HELP! I TOLD EPEL I’D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN’T COOK! Riddle, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?

-- (don't worry, yume can cook)

Yume Asta: In my defense, I was left unsupervised. Silver: Wasn't Sebek with you? Sebek: In my defense, I was also left unsupervised.

--

Yume Asta: What do you think Silver will do for a distraction? Sebek: He’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do. *Building explodes and several car alarms go off* Sebek: ... or he could do that.

--

Yume Asta: It’s dark in here Kalim: Don’t worry dude I got this Kalim: *Stomps their feet* Kalim: *Skechers light up*

--

Yume Asta: Do you have any skeletons in your closet? Kalim: You mean literally or figuratively? Yume Asta: Honestly, the fact that I have to specify...

---

yume rosalia:

Yume Rosalia: *Trying to fill out legal paperwork stuff* Were you guys born AMAB or AFAB? Cater: Bold of you to assume I was born at all. Idia: I personally was created in a lab. Ortho: I just straight up spawned lol.

--

Yume Rosalia: I currently have 7 empty notebooks and I have no clue what to put in them. Suggestions? Cater: Put spaghetti in it. Yume Rosalia: I'm currently taking suggestions from literally anyone but you. Idia: Put spaghetti in it. Yume Rosalia: I'm currently taking suggestions from anyone but you two. Ortho: Put spaghetti in it. Yume Rosalia: I'm no longer taking suggestions.

--

Yume Rosalia: Yo is Malleus sleeping or dead? Leona: Hopefully dead, I hated their guts. Azul: Yeah, so did I. Malleus: Okay first of all, fuck you-

--

Yume Rosalia: *Gently taps table* Leona: *Taps back* Azul: What are they doing? Malleus: Morse code. Yume Rosalia: *Aggressively taps table* Leona: *Slams hands down* YOU TAKE THAT BACK-

--

Yume Rosalia: Fitness tip: never stop pushing yourself. Some say 8 hours of sleep is enough. Why not keep going? Why not 9? Why not 10? Strive for greatness. Lilia: Next time you’re working out do 15 push ups instead of 10. Run 3 miles instead of 2. Eat a whole cake instead of just a slice. Burn your ex’s house down. You can do it. I believe in you. Silver: There were so many mixed messages in that I can’t-

--

Yume Rosalia, to Lilia: My life is in the hands of an idiot! Lilia, motioning to themself and Silver: No no no no no, TWO idiots!

--

Yume Rosalia: Remember when you didn't try to solve all your problems with attempted murder? Malleus: Stop romanticizing the past.

--

Yume Rosalia: Malleus... Why did you draw a pentagram on the floor? Malleus: Your text told me to satanize the house before you returned. Yume Rosalia: Yume Rosalia: I wrote sanitize, Malleus.

---

silvester hatter:

Silvester Hatter: Is stabbing someone immoral? Grim: Not if they consent to it. Ace: Depends who you’re stabbing. Deuce: YES?!?

--

Silvester Hatter: Grim, I'm sad. Grim: *Holds out arms for a hug* It’s going to be okay. Ace: Deuce, I'm sad. Deuce, nodding: mood.

--

Silvester Hatter: God, give me patience. Harper Pendragon (TWST!Howl): I think you mean 'give me strength'. Silvester Hatter: If God gave me strength, you'd be dead.

--

Silvester Hatter: I know you’re deflecting by making jokes about how hot you are. Harper Pendragon: It’s not a joke. Harper Pendragon: *sniffles* Harper Pendragon: I’m a legit snack.

--

Silvester Hatter: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Riddle? Riddle: … No. Trey: I do! Silvester Hatter: I know, Trey. Trey: I’m sad! Silvester Hatter: I know, Trey.

--

Silvester Hatter: Riddle and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us Trey: *Sighing* What did Riddle do? Silvester Hatter: He chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and... Riddle: Who wants a steering wheel?

--

Silvester Hatter: If you had to choose between Idia and all the money I have in my wallet, which would you choose? Ortho: That depends, how much money are we taking about? Idia: Ortho! Silvester Hatter: 63 cents. Ortho: I'll take the money. Idia: ORTHO!!!

--

Silvester Hatter: So, what, now I’m just supposed to do anything that Idia does? I mean, what if they jumped off a cliff? Ortho: If Idia were to jump off a cliff, they would’ve done their due diligence regarding the height of the cliff, the depth of the water, and the angle of entry, so yes. If you see Idia jump off a cliff, by all means, jump off a cliff. Silvester Hatter: You jump off a cliff! Ortho: Gladly. Provided Idia did first.

---

yuu:

Yuu, negotiating with Jamil: We have Ruggie. Give us ten thousand dollars and they will be returned to you unharmed Ruggie: Whoa, whoa, wait, you think I’m only worth ten thousand dollars? Yuu: Ruggie: MAKE IT ONE MILLION– Yuu: RUGGIE STOP

--

Yuu: You have to apologize to Jamil Ruggie: Fine. Ruggie: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.

--

Yuu: We need to get through this locked door. Jack, give me your credit card. Jack: Here. Yuu, pocketing it: Thanks. Ace, kick down the door.

--

Yuu: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it. Jack: Yuu no. Ace: Mistlefoe. Jack: Please stop encouraging them.

--

Yuu: I just ended a four year relationship. Epel: Oh, I’m so sorry. Are you okay? Yuu: Hm? Oh yeah, I’m fine. It wasn’t my relationship. *Vil and Rook fighting from across the room*

--

Yuu: *Screams* Epel: *Screams louder to assert dominance* Vil: Should we do something?! Rook, observing: No, I want to see who wins this.

--

Yuu: Why is Riddle so sad? Jade: They took one of those “Which Character Are You?” quizzes Yuu: And...? Jade: She got Floyd.

--

Yuu, about Jack: Apparently we’re getting someone new in the group. Deuce: Are we stealing them? Ace: New or used? Yuu: Wonderful responses, both of you.

--

Yuu: How did none of you hear what I just said? Jack: I’ve been zoned out for the past two and a half hours. Deuce: I got distracted about halfway through. Ace: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.

--

Yuu: I love you guys, you're the best thing that's happened to me. Grim: We're the best thing that's ever happened to you? Yuu: Yes! Ace: I'm starting to feel a little sorry for you.

--

Yuu: In your opinion, what’s the height of stupidity? Grim: *turning to Ace* How tall are you?

[dare0451]

Hey maybe just maybe don't tell people they drew incest ships when they clearly first off just didn't, and secondly stated that it wasn't a ship

look. i understand the kneejerk discomfort. i may think the pearlclutching around incest ships is silly, but its also not my bag. i dont see the appeal of junejade, personally speaking

that said

junejade isnt incest, lets be real here. they weren't raised together and can't reproduce. they can date. its allowed. it wouldn't be weird irl let alone in fiction.

in that comic they were laying in bed together, one was growling and the other was fearful and flustered, and they kissed. that is bog standard terminally online t4t dog girl romanticism. note for note, shot for shot.

like. its not my fault that that's junejade. they drew junejade. they simply did that action. if i serve you vegetables and meat chunks cooked in broth and as i set it down shout "NOT A STEW OBVIOUSLY" you would look at me like i was insane. rightfully so.