#but I think the shorter posts work better for actual entries yaknow.

[danthectoman]

Vlad is sitting in his office, admiring his newest piece of Packers memorabilia. Sure, he had to possess Lil’ Wayne, but it was all worth it for the absolutely beautiful piece of gold and green leather that was currently sitting against the far wall. The spaces in the armrests were already filled with specially printed bottles of white wine wrapped in green and gold foil and the Packers logo emblazoned across the front.

In a move completely unbecoming of a billionaire, he flopped onto the couch face first without a care in the world. This is as close as he’s going to come to owning the Packers, probably. Maybe. He needed to document this. Now. Immediately. After a few more moments of enjoying the perfectly crafted sofa, Vlad rose and retrieved a camera from the cabinet. Spawning a duplicate, he handed it the camera and went back to the couch.

Vlad laid across the couch once again, this time posing like Burt Reynolds in the Cosmo centerfold, unknowingly asking to be painted like a French girl. The double took the photo and Vlad continued to make a few more pinup-style poses for the camera in his human form, safe in the assumption this was for HIM and his own PERSONAL CALENDAR. After each photo, the double would hold up a thumb, signaling that he could go to the next pose. 

Having a great time, he didn’t even hear as his office door opened, an intern standing in the doorway. Vlad transformed into Plasmius with a laugh as he laid upside down on the couch, head touching the floor and legs thrown over the headrest, and flashed his fangs at the camera. The intern was still standing in the doorway, visibly shaking and unsure of what to do with the scene unfolding in front of her.

After a moment, she steeled herself and cleared her throat, quietly asking “Mr. Masters? I.... I have those reports you wanted....”

“...Oh. Uhhh..... Hi.....He will be with you in a moment. I’m....Waiting on him ....too?” This was the most pathetic attempt to cover anything Vlad had ever heard. He didn’t even know how long the girl had been there. She could have seen everything....

“...Suuuuure...... You know I’ve been standing here for like, five minutes, right?” 

“Oh, Shittake Mushrooms.”