#but I think harping on that too much really takes away from how unique and meaningful his way of writing relationships is already
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glimblshanks · 1 year ago
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I understand wanting to ship the lower decks characters (I enjoy shipping the lower decks characters) but also McMahan is very clearly trying to write romantic friendships with the WC4 and I wish more fans could recognize that and just enjoy it for what it is
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bonebabbles · 3 months ago
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Ivypool's Heart: Finished
Just completed reading the new super edition! I'm pleasantly surprised by this one. Overall, this was a very good book, MUCH better than the past 3 which were some of the most boring and unnecessary entries to the entire franchise.
If you were on the fence about this one, I'd recommend it. Just take this warning; it does the Warrior Cats thing where it harps pretty strong on parenthood and nuclear families being a borderline essential part of life, including a ton of bashing on how uniquely horrible this makes the Sisters.
If you can get past that, it's a pretty solid story about grief that makes some really fun additions to the WC lore, including the wildcats, StormClan, and a broad expansion to the afterlife system.
Meandering thoughts below the cut;
One of IPH's biggest flaws is pacing, but it's not nearly as bad as the past 3 SEs.
Not to mention, this is a pretty small SE. If you're ever bored, it won't last long.
Before the book introduces the Wildcats, it REALLY meanders. It'll pick up, but you will have to wade through relatively uninteresting scenes of the cats traveling and talking about their feelings unprompted.
A lot of "quicktime events" happen out of nowhere to fill pages with cats running away from random bullshit.
There's a horse carriage, an apple picker, dogs, weasels, foxes, a storm, traffic, humans, boats, sandwhiches. It's endless. My eyes glazed over during most of these scenes.
I know a lot of people were dreading Ivypool being nasty and unreasonable during this book, but honestly? I was hoping for it and didn't really receive it.
I find her most compelling when she's holding a grudge, acting on her anger, and generally working through messy issues. But aside from her just thinking about being annoyed or angry, she's really not snappy at all.
I feel like there could have been a lot more interesting and organic conflict between Icewing, Dovewing, and Ivypool's personalities instead of boring Quicktime Events. In fact, I felt like Icewing and Dovewing were kind of underutilized.
The conversations often feel quite stiff, especially in the first half. Everyone is very understanding of each other, respect boundaries and knows not to push too far, resolve their personal issues very easily, etc. It's kinda... unnatural.
Personally, I found that disappointing because I WANTED to see the cats actually process their grief over the course of the book. Watch them act out, maybe get in an fight or two and resolve it for the sake of the mission, have them come to a greater understanding of each other, etc.
Because Icewing and Dovewing are both so motherly and gentle and we're in Ivypool's POV, we don't really get to see them process their grief because of that.
They're not TOTALLY neglected though! I just... wanted more from this group.
However. I wanted LESS Rootspring.
I understand he's there to process the loss of Bristlefrost with Ivypool but god, every time he was on screen I wanted to push him aside and talk to Icewing lmao.
Stop trying to sell me "cool, mellowed from grief" Rootspring. He's a silly little hyperactive man and you will never be able to convince me otherwise.
As a silly little hyperactive semi-manthing myself, it would have been a lot more cathartic to see a clown like me going through grief. Not to mention just generally make for better chemistry with the group.
Between Ice and Dove who are already quite chill as characters, Whistle could have used someone more goofy to bounce off of.
I REALLY didn't like the whole implication that Rootspring is going to move on from Bristlefrost and "find a mother" for the kittens he wants so badly, though.
Erins PLEASE remember that adoption exists. He does not need a wife to be a dad. I'm beaming myself directly into your brains and telepathy-ing directions to the nearest cat adoption agency
aaaaaand on that note.... yeah. I did not like the way that this book leaned so hard on the whole "nuclear family" dynamic. Ivypool has had like two major interactions with her husband and one JUST happened in this book.
It especially bugged me that they leaned into Ivypool having been a very active mother, when we saw very little of that in the ACTUAL book. It wasn't even mentioned that Fernsong was allegedly the primary parent of the kittens when they were young.
But... I was able to look past it and just accept the book in a vacuum. There's a lot of good here.
Like the wildcats.
While I'm still wary of these being Scottish Wildcats and reserve my misgivings about the misuse of species that are very unlike domestic cats... I LOOOOVEEE the culture they've set up for them
I LOVEE the way that individual spirits reach out to the kits, guiding them through life
I LOVE the connection to StormClan
I LOVE their idea of the elements and general spirituality
And I LOVED the fact that a big part of Ivypool coming to terms with her grief was the expansion of her worldview. The way that she realized the religion she was raised with is quite small, and that there is an immense beauty in coming to understand other cultures, accept their advice, and see the world as they do.
I just wish the book had been able to tie that to a flaw that Ivypool has expressed since her very introduction back in OotS-- that she's smallminded.
It would have been a FANTASTIC way to really tackle and address that flaw, and pay off literal decades of set up. I really wish she had been messier in this book because of that!
But, digressing.
I'm over the moon that the team's actually playing with the series' spirituality! After such a long time of them outright avoiding some of the weirder elements in the series, like Rock and Midnight, it's exciting that they're finding some freedom in making new magic lore for themselves.
Hopefully, in the next few super editions, we'll be able to get some more insight to StormClan and the Wildcats.
The book really hits its stride in the second half because of this, and the ending chapters are actually fantastic. Some of the best stuff that's come out of the series (on purpose) in a loooong time.
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severeearthquakebanana · 13 days ago
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Ooooh boy, guess who FINALLY got around to watching the Sailor Moon Cosmos movies. ✨ME✨ so now you allll get to hear about allll my thoughts because thats exactly what tumblr is for😜 anyway
So starting off, i would say that overall this is a good movie. Depending on what metric you use can definitely rank it even higher. But i found a few personal flaws that kept it from being great. Mainly, i just don’t quite like the Stars arc as much as i do the others lol which isnt really on the movie, it just is the plot. And this movie was an EXCELLENT adaption of the manga. I had just reread the last two arcs yesterday so it was very fresh, and yeah, this movie was by far and away the most excellent and spot on adaptation of the manga. If thats your metric, this movie is great.
Additionally, by nature of being animated, all of the jokes and small asides can be cranked up to 11. And they totally did that, which is one of my favorite parts of the movie. Minako fangirling over the three lights and the whole notebook scene was hysterical, and it brought my heart joy that she was allowed to do that. Part of the reason i prefer the 90s anime is because of how much breathing room and comedic gags you get from the characters, its just so fun! So see that here was great.
I also really loved the transformation sequences. Some were unique, some were callbacks to the anime. And i think all of them were executed flawlessly. I really really liked the score behind the transformations too, like the second to last one for Usagi was a complete callback to all the previous versions, with the animation matching the 90s season 1 and the music pulling cues from Crystal season 1. And how could i forget Chibiusa!! Her transformation was kickass, and i’m so excited she got such an awesome and unique transformation for herself this time around.
Speaking of chibi characters, i still didn’t like ChibiChibi. They kept harping so much on “oh we just dont know who you are but we trust you anyway!” Which is in line with the manga! But MAN. I still hate the character. Sailor Cosmos is cool, and like i’d LOVE to cosplay her (if i ever got off my ass and did cosplay but thats another story) but i still feel like shes just an extra body shoehorned in to help move the story along.
Which brings me to my next unfavorable point, so much of this plot is telling not showing. Like don’t get me wrong, the first half when they animate Usagi’s eyes to be solid blue to show her disconnect with reality? AMAZING. The starlight concerts? Also great. But so much plot is “heres all the lore let me talk at you for 5 minutes” and like i KNOW thats a halmark of this style of show but MAN its all just crammed in there especially WITH the sailor cosmos stuff. Its all just very confusing.
Also! Also! This might just be main character syndrome, but like why does Usagi get to grieve the loss of her friends/Mamoru, and shut down entirely, but the rest of the sailor scouts don’t? Like Usagi’s allowed to take the losses personally but Minako isn’t? yeah, it was really great to see Usagi step up by the end of it and be all determined. And yeah, i really really loved the “why is she coming after my friends if she just wants me?” Breakdown because i too would respond the same way. If you’ve got a problem with me, take it up with me. Not my loved ones. If my loved ones step into help and get hurt fine, i will be upset but significantly less so because they chose to intervene. Idk man just bugs me.
Also speaking of Mamoru, i still LOVE his english voice actor. Omg this man needs to play more love interests, his voice is like silk and it’s fantastic lol
Now my last complaint is more just because my dumbass apparently was real blind a year ago when watchig this all the first time. Why is Sailor Lead Crow a dominatrix? Why is she wearing basically lingerie? Same with Sailor Iron Mouse. Her outfit too is basically lingerie. I’m all for cool and interesting outfits, but like Sailor Aluminum Siren had strappy and skimpy clothes, but her outfit didn’t look NEAR as questionable. Idk i just thought it was dumb. I also find the starlight’s outfits to be dumb as well. Mainly just the pants tho. The rest of it is fine, but their pants could be just a little longer ya know? Maybe i’m just being old and crotchety. Also on this topic, i’ve never like Haruka’s dress in the final scene. Yeah she’d definitely be more modest than the others but damn. Not that bad. I’d picture her in something closer to what Meghan Markle wore for her dress, except with maybe a crew neck instead of a boat neck. And make the whole damn think sparkly if you must. Not a high collar like in the 1800s.
Anyway to close this off with a final positive! I, like everyone else, ADORED the additional scene after the cauldron but before the wedding where Usagi makes it back to her parents house and Shingo picks at her. If there was ANYTHING that brought this full circle, it was that. And like i said in my original read thru of this arc, i don’t care about sailor cosmos, i care about Usagi and if SHES okay. And this bridge scene really shows that yes, everyone was able to be reborn and continue on their current paths, and Usagi made it home to her parents and brother and Luna. And i think it also helped make the bed/wedding scenes feel more like an epilogue, like that time really had passed and they didn’t just jump from the cauldron to that part of their life, which is appreciated.
So yeah, overall, good movie. Excellent adaption of the manga, and added several things in that i thought elevated the work. I’ve got my nitpicks, but i think if the purpose of this arc was to bring Usagi to her lowest after the high of last arc’s coronation, it executed. Great way to spend 3 hours, i highly recommend 🤗
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guavaboyxxx · 4 months ago
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i thought i was past writing empty text posts on tumblr, but you stopped talking to me two weeks ago and i can't seem to find a better outlet than this.
i'm always checking to see if you're checking in on me, and you're not anymore.... so i hope that means you're doing better. i fear you're doing worse but i know that if i reached out - i'd be making you worse.
you always said you'd have to delete me from your life if we ever broke up. you'd have to go somewhere new for awhile, or at the very least - pretend that i don't exist. but i do exist. and i don't want to leave. i don't want to leave our mutual place of work, i don't want to leave our mutual friends - but i feel so incredibly guilty for existing.
i finally slept with someone new the other day. without even think about it - i did a check in with myself as soon as he left. to my dismay, i still felt the gap in my chest where you used to reside. i wish i could've done these things while we were still together. i wish things could've been different.
but they never would've been. and it's half my fault too, i was petrified to be myself. there was just some sort of disconnect between your emotional triggers and mine. or maybe, too much of a connection.
it's not that i wasn't trying. i hope you know i never wanted to "give up" or that i ever stopped loving you. i just had poured all of myself out. your final straw was mine aswell. we were both at a point of tipping over and spilling out. i don't think either of us meant for it to get that bad, but i think we're both equally at fault.
there was just something that didn't mesh well between us. could it have been our mutual healed trauma? i think so. that's the only answer that makes sense to me anyway, which is why i harped on us taking time away from eachother to work on ourselves.
i wish you'd have understood. heard me. taken the time. all of your attempts at restablishing connection prematurely - scared me away. i couldn't be met with choosing your love or choosing myself. i need to choose me right now just as much as i believe you need to be choosing you.
i couldn't bare to hear just how in it you still were. i needed to be there for myself. heal some things. and then remeet the man i've loved all these years. but i don't think you understood that. you wanted all of it. i think that maybe letting go wasn't the hardest part for you - but rather you choosing yourself.
i hope that gets easier with time because you deserve the love you so effortlessly give to others. heal from those that have hurt you. be the bigger man. you deserve all the good things in the world - and i pray one day you believe that as much as i do. as much as everyone does. anyone who has ever truly seen your soul knows how golden it is.
it's killing me to not reach out and ask how you're doing. what your plans are, how you're feeling. but i know that's not my place anymore. i know i would now be hurting more than i'd be helping.
i feel helpless. after years of tending to your garden and forgetting to water my own, i'm not sure where all this extra care could even go. i'm doing my best to take care of myself, but there's still so much space where you once were. i miss you so everyday.
i see your things everywhere and it hurts. i pray one day you'll be okay enough to mend the gap and help me get all of your stuff out of this apartment. i could help you pack, i could help you move into your own place. i'm so proud of you for doing that. i really hope it makes you feel independent and strong. and unique. i already know you're going to have the coolest decorations and furniture. i laugh when i think about all the protein bars, chicken, and cosmic brownies that will glitter your pantry.
oh, if only things were different. but they aren't. and we will just have to live with that.
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mettywiththenotes · 3 years ago
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This isn't unique to MHA at all but it feels like spending too much time interacting with the fandom compared to the source material ends up ruining the experience. Like I got the Team Up Mission books for Christmas and ended up crying at Melissa's story and it reminded me of why I fell in love with the story in the first place. It feels like the fandom is determined to nitpick everything to death and suck all the joy out of the story.
Oh yeah definitely
I feel like with fandom, you have to pick your battles, because it can escalate really quickly. Not necessarily with other people, but just like, your perception of the story, characters, even your perception of the writer
I mean, I remember loads of times where people went off about Hori being an abuse apologist or a misogynist. I think there were a few that called him racist, but I can't be sure of that so take it with a pinch of salt (if I remember correctly, they were about Hori's choice for Satou's design but mostly with the Ujiko name thing)
And there were a lot of times where I bought into that kind of thing. Where I started to think, actually, Hori is bad and horrible. I started to lose faith in his ability to write and tell a story because people kept harping on about Endeavor and Hawks and the kids and just everything
Even just the negativity in general effected the way I saw the story. It sucked
Fandom can really mess with your perception of things. You kinda have to take a step back and realize that maybe your opinions are being influenced by a collective mindset
And it is hard to separate yourself from fandom sometimes. You have to be able to decide what is good and bad in your own opinion, and not as a collective one
Of course you can take bits and pieces from other people's opinions. Sharing what you think and being open to other perceptions is a good thing! But you also have to be able to say "I don't agree with your view but I accept that you have it", go off and do your own thing
Also, you don't even have to agree or disagree to an opinion. You can just say "That's interesting to think about" and take it into consideration if you want
That's one of the reasons I don't do leak nights. The whole "collective mindset" thing with the first impression of a chapter really messes with what I'm supposed to personally think, so instead I just filter the tags, read the chapter on the friday and then read what everybody else thinks afterwards. If my impression was positive and the fandom's was negative, I can at least know that I have my own opinion of it and that it wasn't influenced by anyone else
Anyway, point is: I think you're absolutely right that the fandom nitpicks so many things
It's a shame, really, because bnha is a good series. I like that it's different. I've wanted "different" for years now, and Hori delivered
That's my opinion on it, and I'm sticking to it
If I'm to give you any advice, it would be
1) Have faith in Hori.
It sounds a bit too hopeful, I'm sure, but the guy does know how to round things out. Trust that he knows what he's doing, even just the littlest bit. Hang onto that little bit of hope. I say this as someone who has seen the up-and-down phases of the fandom
2) Be sure of your own opinion on the series.
Take a step back once in a while, even just briefly, and ask yourself if the fandom is effecting your view negatively. If it is, and it's in a very intense way, it may be time to take a break from the fandom. That doesn't mean you have to stop reading bnha! Just enjoy it away from all of the hate for a while, however long you want
If you decide to be interactive about avoiding the negative stuff, you can also make your own posts about what you like about the series. Even just something about the art. Personally, that works for me and it's improved how I look at the manga. Obviously, there's no shame in staying away from the fandom for a while, but it's an alternative if you'd rather not take a break🙂
3) Above all, remember that the series isn't over yet.
A lot of discourse and hate, I've noticed, is about current problems in the story. Please remember that any of those problems can still be fixed. There's still time to change the situation. There's still time to address it. Don't write off about how Hori has portrayed so-and-so as such-and-such-a-thing, this is the worst - it can still be changed.
4, and this is a personal thing I go by but I want to share if it helps) Hori is Just A Guy.
The vibe I get from Hori is that... he's just someone who wants to tell a story. And he wants to do it in his own way. That's literally it. Fandom treats him like he's the worlds last hope at a good story but it isn't true. He's just a guy who sits in his office, draws and writes a story he wants to tell. He is simply vibing (also stressed but like. in terms of story and laying things out, he is vibing)
I hope this helps, at least
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bigmeatymudcrabchitins · 4 years ago
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A not-so-brief overview of my Skyrim Dova OCs bc i need to scream to the digital void about my ideas
Freyora Lind, more commonly known by her strange alias “Bjorne Icepick”
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A Nord-eventually-turned-werewolf who orphaned during the Great War and taken in by a Dunmeri mercenary whose residence was in Windhelm’s Gray Quarter. Grew up in a cramped boarding house setting among desperate mercenaries of varying backgrounds. Many of them would all come and go, but there was always some sort of a familial bond between them all.
From a young age she got in a lot of fights against people who insulted her for living in the Gray Quarter among the dark elves. Eventually she took a fight too far and was jailed for murder around 14, but was broken out shortly after by a band of masked vampires. Turns out some of her mercenary comrades unwittingly caught vampirism during a contract to clear out a vampire den and had to skip town, but not before ensuring one of their own wasn’t left to rot.
Lived in Cyrodil for about 15 years, but returned to Skyrim pursuing rumors surrounding a cure to vampirism, as her adoptive father would be nearing the end of his elven lifespan and had wished to die a normal death.
Seeing as she was literally a fugitive, and her long-belated parents were somewhat renowned for their battlefield prowess, she took on a false identity. AND an act to match it.
She’ll eat raw meat, chase prey with swords instead of using a bow like a normal person, harp about irrational conspiracy theories, and more. Everyone’s foul reactions to her outlandish act are plainly hilarious to her and only encourage her to act even stranger.
The alias “Bjorne Icepick” was simply the most ridiculous name she could think of.
Not the most morally outstanding. Besides drunken brawling, she’ll steal from anyone who angers her, even if it’s things she literally won’t ever need such as all the goblets in a household. It’s the pettiness that counts. “Try drinking your damn high-end wine now, jackass.”
Calls Dwarven Automatons “Gundams.” Including she herself, no one knows what that means.
Joins the Companions out of homesickness and a desire to fill in a gap that leaving home left.
Hasn’t bothered curing herself of lycanthropy because her whole schtick is being incredibly resourceful, and that includes using any means of power necessary. Still doesn’t fancy Hircine’s Hunting Grounds as her desired afterlife, though.
As her journey goes on, however, her lightheartedly eccentric face starts to fall off as a number of events push her to begin to question the legitimacy of her actions up until that point.
Some of which include the eventual death of her adoptive father (and how she was indirectly responsible for it even if it was what he wanted), Delphine’s ultimatum, the civil war as a collective, learning the tragic history behind the Falmer and the original Companions’ role in it, and killing of Vyrthur (no matter how much he genuinely deserved it).
She grows disgusted by herself down to the core. She takes to skooma to cope, and starts to be plagued by serious skooma-induced side effects. She ends up shutting herself away from all her responsibilities and distancing herself from her friends.
Does she get better? Maybe. I haven’t thought up anything past this point lol
Moureneris Alta
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A very, VERY ancient vampiric snow elf, (though it’s notable she was born a considerable amount of time after the razing of Sarthaal)
Survived many atrocities. Stayed in isolation with a band of vampires for countless years out of sheer disgust for the nature of the sapient races. (I’ll explain her full story some other time. It’s pretty complicated)
She was abducted from her isolated lifestyle by a certain person i’ll talk about later. She managed to free herself south of Skyrim, and uh, walks right into that Imperial ambush. The rest is history.
Super ignorant to modern society as a result of centuries of isolation. Exploited for comedic relief. (“What in the name of Oblivion is a Cyrodilic Empire? Are you messing with me? And please, how does levitation magic simply get outlawed by this hypothetical Empire? What are you to do when you fall down a crevice? Just... let yourself perish? How degrading.)
She reintegrated herself into society with vengeance in mind under the belief that all humans are savage bloodlusting murderers who had to answer for their treachery. (And she was royally angry there was no Dwemer left to spite, but partially satisfied at the same time). But she grows conflicted after being shown genuine kindness, even as early as being freed from her binds in Helgen.
Subsequently has a very muddled redemption arc. Queue Dragonborn hero stuff
She has impaired vision, but she cultivated detect life magic to aid her in daily life and combat (think Hyakkimaru from Dororo ‘19 and his soul detection or Toph Beifong from ATLA and her seismic sense). At her peak, she can detect life from about a kilometer away.
She can just barely read, but only if she holds the text incredibly close to her face, not to mention her Cyrodilic lessons were left unfinished after her abduction, making reading a very taxing process. Weary travelers are often spooked at the sight of a floating, ghastly looking elven woman with her nose pressed up against crossroad signs, and it has become somewhat of an urban legend.
Isn’t as nearly as skilled with detecting the dead and tenses up in burial crypts or around other vampires for that reason. Unfortunately, being the Dragonborn and all, she finds herself in a lot of crypts...
When questioned about her background due to her unique appearance: “Oh, yeah. My mother was one of those mer from the east. You know the ones. Dark elves, I think? And my father was one of those er, tall elv- no, sorry, HIGH elves. Yeah. They both died in a big fire or something though. It was horrible. I can’t get the noxious smell or the deafening screams out of my head. Good talk, but never ask me about that again.”
Queue sheltered old immortal antics: “Wow, you’re THAT old? Enlighten me on how it felt witnessing the fall of the Dwemer. Or perhaps the rise of Tiber Septim’s Empire. The Gates of Ob-“ “Oblivion if I know. I lived in someone’s basement for thousands of years. And I still don’t know what everyone means by Empire. You all are messing with me, aren’t you? That really annoys me.”
She ultimately returns to faith in Auri-El and makes it her life’s purpose to help the Betrayed find peace, as well as to seek out any remaining snow elf groups. Probably good friends with Gelebor or something.
Had a crush on Serana. We all know how THAT went. Damned temples.
Was originally gonna spiral into a much darker corruption arc (another ATLA comparison being Jet or Hama) but I just felt bad for her. Moureneris can have a little found peace. As a treat.
That’s her preliminary design made. I’ll need a mod to properly play her, because that right there was made by choosing Dunmer as her race. But I can’t do that. I’m on console, and while I got the Steam port a month ago, my PC’s stone age specs can’t handle Skyrim yet and I’ll need to wait until I can afford a better graphics card (thanks economic inflation)
Alexandre Armasi, jokingly nicknamed Alexandre the Curious
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A complete and unapologetic export of my character from a dead and unfinished DND campaign. Except there are no Aasimar in Skyrim, so he’s half Altmer half Bosmer. And his initial last name was Armas but I thought Armasi suited his Skyrim counterpart more, as subtle a change it is.
He’s mainly Bosmer in appearance and constitution, save for his hair and eyes, which are more similar to that of his Altmeri father’s.
I can’t really export his original backstory though because the campaign wouldn’t translate well into TES lore at all.
He’s a writer who came wandering into Skyrim in search of inspiration. While he mainly writes dramatic fables, he wanted to divert his focus to crafting his own bestiary and herbal compendium surrounding Skyrim’s fauna and flora. The ones at home are simply too vague to him!
He’s very altruistic, wishing to spread cheer wherever he goes, through the art of song (even though he was a cleric in DND and not a bard. My bad.) However, many of his verses are just blatant self promotions of his published fables.
But he’s too naive for his own good. Dangerously so. In fact, he says what’s on his mind with little forethought, with little grasp on the consequences of his actions, which lands him in lots of trouble. “I don’t favor him myself, but you guys kill people over Talos worship? That’s not very cool. A bit scary, if you ask me.” or “A Stormcloak rebel? Didn’t your leader kill a bunch of Reachmen rebels years back, or so I’ve heard. By the divines that’s not a man I’d make a symbol of nonconformity.”
He’s also insatiably curious. The type to ACTUALLY shove alchemic ingredients in his mouth with no knowledge of their properties, experiment with dangerous rune spells, throw rocks at pressure plates, and more. Needless to say he’s very accident prone.
Doesn’t know common curse words. People exploit this for laughs. Think that episode of Spongebob.
Everyone is a little baffled that HE of all people is the prophesied Dragonborn of legend. This agonizingly imbecilic writer who has absentmindedly wandered into burial crypts, troll dens, bandit forts, and more, too busy juggling his manuscripts to pay attention to his surroundings.
His past doesn’t exactly reflect his outlook on life. His mother and father fought in the Great War aligned with the Imperials despite their elven background. Both managed to live to see the war’s conclusion, but his father vanished without a trace shortly after, and it seems his mother knows something she won’t tell him.
With plenty of exposure to bad influences, his innocence is slowly lost throughout the course of his journey, and his altruism begins to grow twisted. But nevertheless, he maintains his jovial, social persona, except this time with much darker undertones. Kinda like a creepy dentist or something.
Whoops. He winds up becoming a feared Dark Brotherhood assassin. (Haha get it “Innocence Lost”???) He somehow deluded himself into thinking that the life of an assassin was the right thing to do. But he’s a funky little guy so he gets a pass for his heinous crimes against society
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needletail · 4 years ago
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Nintendogs vs Nintendogs + Cats: a review and comparison.
There’s no doubt that most people want a new Nintendogs game for the Nintendo Switch. But when I see these posts, very few of them are referencing the 3ds variant of the game, but rather the original ds version that everyone continues to know and love.
The addition of cats is Nintendogs + Cats’ most notable feature. It was, while cute and fun for a short period of time, notably worse than its predecessor. But why is that? The formula stayed roughly the same, but the charm didn’t quite hit.
Before we dive into this: these are my opinions on the games, and personal comparisons. Every person experiences things differently, and will likely have different opinions.
We can start with breaking down the original Nintendogs. The graphics have not aged well, but the charm and entertainment factor have. While replaying, I found that the general ambience and the music used endeared me further to the game, and I wanted to play more. The half hour timer on going for walks was frustrating (as was the stamina system), but it otherwise engaged me more to figure out where I wanted to go. The map feels surprisingly big with so much to do, and the side-scrolling walk screen keeps the mystery alive in what you’ll encounter. The competitions were fun and the voice recognition system may have been even better than the 3ds incarnation. The only thing that really suffered were the graphics - but this game is 15 years old and this was advanced for its time, so we can let that slide. The dogs can be a little strange to look at at times, but they’re expressive and distinct, which is what matters in a pet simulator.
The information you can take in is optional, but an exciting part of the game for those who are interested. Your dog’s profile is detailed but easy to understand, going as far as to tell you what it ate last. There’s something so charming about it being displayed as if it were a document you had in front of you - it brings another element of immersion into this sim.
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[Image ID: a photograph of the informational sheet on Nintendogs. It includes the name, gender, breed, trainer, time together, coat, hunger, thirst, and things eaten. The trick list and contest results are also on this screen.] 
From cars passing by to horns in the distance and dog barks from somewhere vaguely nearby, the sound design of Nintendogs is audibly aged, but still strong. The few tracks spread in the game are iconic, and stay in my head a lot longer than I’d like to admit. 
The competitions are another huge highlight of the original nintendogs. The banter between the hosts, Ted and Archie, is something that continues to be remembered. Everyone’s seen the line “you make me feel like a man, Archie”, and the banter they keep up in each competition is less like a mindless tapping chore and just more entertainment. The settings are surprisingly realistic - less so on the obedience, but the ring set up for agility certainly is. The balance between realism and fun is another part of why Nintendogs appealed to all audiences. 
Agility is my personal favourite event, and the same goes for a lot of people I’ve met. There’s a level of interactivity here that isn’t met by the successor (something we’ll touch on later). Guiding your dog over hurdles and through tunnels, and later having to balance speed with accuracy - it’s an event that keeps you, the player, engaged. It becomes a sort of fine art once you hit the Championship level, as your dog, by that point, is likely going to be very fast and have a mind of its own, often trying to predict which obstacles it’s going to go through. 
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[Image ID: an angled photograph of the starter agility training course. The dog is laying on the green, and the hurdles and tunnels are in view.] 
Disc is in both versions, and is fun in its own way. I, personally, don’t tend to use the disc competition - in the original Nintendogs, the projectiles can be a little speedier than you intend them to be, and the dogs are a little too determined to hold onto their toys. But, with a well-trained dog, this event can be as fun as anything else. In the original, you didn’t have to contend with the other dogs - something that I’ve grown to appreciate over the years. But, like with the event that removed Agility, I’ll be looking at how the changes fared later. 
Obedience is held on a stage, and is a fun event for people who take the time to train their dogs. Your dog can typically learn three or four tricks a day (depending on the dog), and between the tricks listed in the Obedience Guide Book and the unlisted tricks that your dog can learn, you can usually blow the competition out of the park. It definitely requires the most time and effort out of all of the events, and it can be frustrating if your dog suddenly stops listening - but the rewards are surprisingly good. It’s always fun to have a well-trained Nintendog, if only because showing them off when I was a child was my favourite thing to do. 
Obviously, competitions are the main money-makers in these games. Tackle a solid few of them, and you’ll find yourself able to afford another dog or two. Though your room is limited to three dogs, there’s also a Hotel to keep some other dogs in. As time progresses and you gain more of a bond with your dog(s), you’ll unlock more breeds. 
Something that went over my head when I was a child was the method to unlock Jack Russells, specifically. You need to find an incredibly rare book - something which I don’t ever recall doing, and still haven’t. I found this information via the wikia, so I’m not too sure how accurate is, but it is an interesting breed to lock behind a time and patience-based method. 
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[Image ID: an angled image of a German Shepherd laying on its side. In the corner is an idea bubble.] 
Overall, Nintendogs is a solid and fun pet simulator, and it’s clear why so many people have such good memories. The dogs are filled with personality (even being expressive enough to show you when they’re angry vs happy), the competitions are engaging, and though the format will become stale after playing daily for a long time, it’s always a fun game to come back to after a period of time. 
Which is why it’s unsurprisingly that it gained a sequel.
I remember being ecstatic when Nintendogs + Cats was shown in advertisements on television. When I got the 3ds, I also got a copy of Nintendogs + Cats. The Golden Retriever version, specifically, but I do own all three. For some reason? As people got bored with it, they usually gifted me them. 
At first blush, it’s almost as charming as the original. The graphics style handles much better than the original, with slightly more realistic movements, and less cardboard-y models. I much prefer the Nintendogs + Cats models to the originals, for obvious reasons - though their movements can be a little repetitive and strange at times, and a lot less expressive than the originals. But that said, I much prefer the Kennel system of petting and exploring the dogs and their behaviours (limited as they are) before you adopt, and I enjoy sorting through colours or getting unique colours/patterns. The rare white variants used to be my obsession, as a child. 
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[Image ID: a german shepherd holding a present in Nintendogs + Cats. The model is significantly better than the original Nintendogs model.] 
Immediately, though, there’s a lot less ambience in Nintendogs + Cats. I play with my volume up all the way, and it’s typically just my dogs and cat making noises. I miss the cars going by and the general background noise that the game can provide. It feels just a little too silent, and the music tracks are repetitive and unmemorable for the most part. Obviously sound design don’t make or break the game, so I won’t harp on this point for too long. 
The gameplay is...fine? I’m not a fan of petting a shadow of my dog, but I understand they did that for 3D purposes (something which most people didn’t use, to the point that the 2DS was made. I play on a 2DS). The camera control is an incredibly nice feature to have, the showering minigame is a little more thorough. They didn’t really add anything to the care features, though. If anything, they took away a lot of experiences - reading the care books and instead guiding you through the tricks one by one instead of as you want, forcing you to learn a specific set of tricks before you can move on to the next ones. The game is far more hand-holdy, which can be frustrating at multiple points. But, hey. There’s cats! Let’s talk about the cats. 
What’s their purpose? Not much. Which is fine, although they take up a slot in your three-pet designation. As cute as the cats are, they definitely got done dirty. There’s three selections to choose from (Standard, Oriental, and Long-hair), with multiple colours, but not much depth beyond that. Obviously, the cats were just a cute addition - I do like having my little cat wandering around the house with my two dogs, and I know from past experiences that once you bond with the cat, it’ll go out and get presents for you if you leave your ds on. Gaining affection with the cats is very slow-going and if you’re someone who likes your pet simulations to be more interactive, it might be wiser to stick with the dogs. I’m not complaining against the addition of cats - it just could’ve been done much smoother, with better mechanics enabled. Be it adding some breeds and a proper grooming minigame to maintain them, or the ability to train them but have them be much harder than the dogs. There were many ways to put cats into the game, and I just don’t think they hit as intended. 
So, how did they do with the competitions? Well. 
The short answer: they’re pretty bland, and a downgrade from the original.  The long answer... 
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[Image ID: a white cocker spaniel chewing on a banana lure.] 
In the competitions, there’s no more Ted/Archie banter. It’s just Ted. Doing his thing. I honestly do not read the text for this game, and instead tap quickly to progress to the events. 
Replacing Agility comes Lure Coursing. I’m not sure about other countries, but that’s an incredibly niche section of dog sporting here, and it’s also notorious for being...very boring. And in the game, it lives up to that. Instead of guiding your dog through obstacles, you wind the cog of a lure and honk it to get the dog to follow it. Sometimes you honk it to get them over hurdles. I have to admit, I usually space out when I’m training my dogs with this - it’s an easy moneymaker once you’ve trained them up to Nintendogs Cup level, but it’s easily the most mind-numbing event. Anything would’ve been better. If they didn’t want to implement Agility, there are other dog sports that could’ve suited well; guiding your dog through the Flyball course and using its name to bring it back until it could do it on command (maybe even utilising a team of three, for reason as to why you can have up to three dogs), or sledding, using your dog to pull a lightweight sled (on wheels) through a course in a race against other dogs (or, again, even using your trio). There could have even been scenting sport in which you teach your dog how to scent and go off to find a mark, or herding. The point is: lure coursing is the most unengaging thing to put in a game. 
The Disc competition barely changes, so I won’t say much. I don’t particularly enjoy having the other dogs in the ring to compete with as it becomes all too easy for them to interfere heavily with your own dog, but I understand why it was implemented and know that a lot of people enjoy it. I prefer the throwing speed and the control you can have over the disc, and will admit that overall, the Disc competition is generally improved. 
But then you come to the Obedience Trial. AR Cards are mandatory. You don’t have a surface to put your AR Cards on, or lost them years ago? Then you can’t do it. I actually ordered AR Cards, having thrown out my old ones due to damages and general...lack of use. As of this post, I have been unable to play the Obedience Trial, so I can’t say much on whether the system has improved. I do know that AR Cards can work on a laptop screen or something similar, but the 3ds camera is pretty horrible and can glitch out, making it unreliable for screen-based AR cards. Unfortunately. 
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[Image ID: a white cocker spaniel standing on an AR Card.]
The walking system is fine. I love being able to go to different routes (as limited as they can be - but the original was no saint to repetitiveness once you knew the whole map), and I like having to go between grass patches, with a chance for a surprise present. I think the addition of the BARC stores are a cute touch, and the Miis walking their own dogs are cute, too. The interactions between your dog and theirs is based on your dog’s personality as well as theirs, which makes sense - but there’s basically three outcomes. More than the original, but meeting with other dogs tends to be to see if you can backtrack when you’re near the end of the walk by having them invite you to the cafe or park, or to get presents from Streetpass miis. I like the cone minigame to test your control over the dog and its leash, and as a rule, I just...like it. It’s relaxing. I don’t prefer it over the original, but I don’t prefer the original over it. They both have their benefits and downfalls. The biggest upside to + Cats’ system is that you can take your dog on as many walks as you want. 
Interactivity isn’t really a thing, with + Cats. Whereas in the original you could legitimately piss off your dog and it would bark and snarl at you for a while before you regained its trust, this game doesn’t punish you for much. I poked and prodded at my dog for a while, and it didn’t really do much for me. This is a game where you sort of just have cute looking models that hold up surprisingly well for their time, and that’s it. There’s not much game to the game, as it were - and that’s from a game where the gameplay was limited as it was. 
Adding multiple accessories to your pets is a very nice addition, albeit expected. Overall, though, the gameplay has been significantly dumbed down and while I understand that kids play it, my generation played Nintendogs as small children and we got by just fine. It’s a very intuitive game, and it’s almost insulting how little Nintendogs + Cats thinks of its audience. 
Another nice addition to Nintendogs + Cats, though, is body type for your pets. There’s a few that your pet can be: underfed, skinny, optimal, plump, and overfed. I usually have optimal dogs, but apparently plump and overfed dogs run slower and as such they do poorer in competitions, which is a pretty neat feature to have in-game. 
In the short of it, Nintendogs + Cats is fine, but Nintendogs (the original) is Good. I have a lot more nostalgia for Nintendogs which may cloud my opinion, but playing it in 2020 is still fun, and I’m especially happy to play the Agility competition.
For an interactive pet simulator with fun competitions and plenty to do, Nintendogs is the way to go.  For a pretty enough game with simplistic gameplay, Nintendogs + Cats is the way to go. 
Both games have their perks, but I certainly have a clear favourite. If a Switch edition of Nintendogs ever happened, I’d much prefer the original style with some of the quality of life changes made in the successor. In the end, it’s all up to what you’re looking for in a game - but as someone who’s looking for a fun time, I’m a sucker for the originals. 
(Note: I have not played the knock-off Nintendogs for Switch, and would appreciate input on if it’s worth buying or not. Reviews are poor at best, as far as I can tell, though.) 
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astonishinglegends · 4 years ago
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Ep 205: Terry Carnation's "Dark Air" and Rich Hatem
“Imagine the universe, compressed on the head of a pin…”
– Scott’s remembrance of a Carl Sagan quote, which, turns out, probably originates from a parody impression of Carl Sagan
Description:
We have a very special guest joining us tonight, metaphysical "astralnaut," philosopher of the liminal, "Pope of the Paranormal," and host of the AM Radio talk show Dark Air, Terry Carnation. Terry first got his start in the paranormal radio genre when unexpectedly thrust into taking over for another show. While working as a late-night rock n' roll Disc Jockey for an FM station in Buffalo, NY, in 1992, Reginald Wilcox, the host of the paranormal call-in show that aired after Terry's slot was mysteriously murdered while Terry was in the bathroom... or so he claims. In his unflappable sense of duty, apparently stronger than his sense of legal obligation, Terry immediately took over the role of consigliere for listeners stupefied by the supernatural. And in Terry's words, "that's how a legend was created." Now, after a three-year hiatus, Terry Carnation returns with a new podcast, also called Dark Air, available starting April 1, 2021, wherever podcasts are given away for free. While you may not have heard of him, there will be something uneasily familiar about his voice and visage. And the audience will come to know his strange power for tearing off the head of disbelief and reaching down deep into our souls to yank out the viscera of our darkest fears and mysteries. Wrapped around our interview with Terry, our good buddy Rich Hatem joins us once again to discuss his latest adventures and projects. We'll also con him into playing our version of a game show, in the spirit of America's NPR radio program Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me! and Britain's Would I Lie to You? We'll tell Rich three outrageous paranormal stories, and he has to guess which one is fake. Please join us for an episode of inscrutable levity.
Reference Links:
Terry Carnation’s website, TerryCarnation.com
Terry Carnation and Dark Air on Audioboom, where you can subscribe to the platform of your choice
Dark Air with Terry Carnation on Apple Podcasts
Follow Terry Carnation on Instagram
Follow Terry Carnation on Twitter
Terry Carnation on Facebook
Where to stream DC Titans
“TERRIBLE FLYING JELLY BAGS aka DOMSTEN BLOBS: (SWEDEN)” by Rob Morphy on cryptopia.us
National Public Radio’s Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!
The BBC One panel show involving true and false tales, Would I Lie To You?
“The Story Behind The Haunted Donkey Lady Bridge In Texas Will Send Chills Down Your Spine” from OnlyInYourState.com
“South Texas Haunted Folklore: The Tale of the Converse Werewolf” from KSAT.com
On a totally unrelated subject…
Rainn Wilson is best known for playing the role of Dwight Schrute on NBC's The Office. Additional film and television credits include Galaxy Quest, Almost Famous, The Rocker, Super, Six Feet Under, Juno, Backstrom, Star Trek Discovery, Thom Pain, The Meg, Mom, Don't Tell a Soul and Utopia.  He will also be appearing in the forthcoming podcast Dark Air with Terry Carnation. Wilson co-founded SoulPancake, a digital media company, and the Lide Foundation, an educational initiative in rural Haiti that empowers at-risk women and girls through the arts.
Dark Air with Terry Carnation was created by Rainn Wilson and Aaron Lee and is produced by Thom Harp and Chris Kelly. Dark Air with Terry Carnation is a production of Imperial Mammoth, Audioboom and Kelly&Kelly. Theme music by Marcos Moscat
This episode features the voice talents of Jinous Khjadivian and Dana Davis as the two audience callers.
Please help out our good friend Stan Gordon, by purchasing his books on Amazon and Barnes & Noble – you’re gonna love ‘em!
At Barnes & Noble:
Silent Invasion: The Pennsylvania UFO-Bigfoot Casebook
Astonishing Encounters: Pennsylvania’s Unknown Creatures, Casebook 3
Really Mysterious Pennsylvania: UFOs, Bigfoot, and Other Weird Encounters, Casebook 1
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Credits:
Episode 205: Terry Carnation’s “Dark Air“ and Rich Hatem. Produced by Scott Philbrook & Forrest Burgess; Audio Editing by Sarah Vorhees Wendel. Sound Design by Ryan McCullough; Tess Pfeifle, Producer, and Lead Researcher; Research Support from the astonishing League of Astonishing Researchers, a.k.a. The Astonishing Research Corps, or "A.R.C." for short. Copyright 2021 Astonishing Legends Productions, LLC. All Rights Reserved.
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vicecityhq · 3 years ago
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██████████████]99% LOADING...SUSPECT INTO THE APD DATABASE...
WITNESS(ES) SAY HE REMINDS THEM OF: autumn, forestpunk, cottagegore, darkest academia . With a slight resemblance to PAKORN THANASRIVANITCHAI of/the ACTOR.
CLICK BELOW TO VIEW ENTIRE FILE.
FULL FILE:
Last Name, First Name: Suwannarat, Briar Alias: Pan (codename for his job), Ari (more of a nickname than an alias) Realm of birth (if earth, nationality): Earth realm, Thailand Age: 29 Date of Birth: November 23rd Gender: Male Preferred Pronouns: He/Him Species: Children of the Twelve - Sagittarius Occupation: Police Detective Sexual Orientation: Homosexual
VISUAL FILE: 
Skin Color: Tanned, burnt orange hue with a smattering of chocolate freckles along his face. He has the same freckles throughout his body, but has bigger white spots along his shoulders, the backs of his ears, and his outer hips. Eye color: Honey Brown Scars: None that have a significant story Piercings: None Tattoos: None Hair color: Dark chocolate brown Abnormalities: Fawn-like ears Horns/ wings/ etc: Small, stumpy antlers that stick just above his hair Transformed form: He does not have a transformation.
PERSONAL FILE:
RELIGIOUS BELIEF: Agnostic, but was raised Buddhist SINS:  greed  /  gluttony  /  sloth  /  lust  /  pride  /  envy  /  wrath VIRTUES: chastity  /  charity  /  diligence  /  humility /  kindness /  patience /  justice KNOWN LANGUAGES: English, Thai, Latin SECRETS: Teen romance can be rough, right? It’s like two colliding whirlwinds of emotions, hormones, and desires. One minute you’re together, the next you’re broken up for no reason. Now when that volatility is coupled with doubts about sexuality, it’s just a disaster waiting to happen. Most people didn’t accidentally melt half of their boyfriend’s face off and cause him to have to undergo grueling, expensive reconstructive surgery that would never quite make things right, though. Briar had told him the gloves had to stay on, but kids were reckless and foolishly believed in their own infallibility so it didn’t take much convincing to risk it all for some skin on skin. Then next thing they knew, Briar was babbling some half brained excuse about a science experiment gone wrong while his boyfriend’s blood curdling screams echoed in his ears. It was believably enough… until a month after - when the swelling from some of his injuries went down - his former lover was able to unintelligibly mutter “Briar did it.” Then suddenly an ‘accident’ turned into a full scale investigation of malicious intent. All Briar could do was tell the truth. He didn’t know which was more difficult - coming clean about his powers or coming out of the closet. But the officer sitting across from him and his distraught mother in the cramped interrogation room didn’t seem particularly disturbed by the confession. His bushy brows only furrowed in disappointment over the entire situation. In the end, Briar was only charged with obstruction of justice for initially lying to police, but the damage to his reputation was irreparable. His mother decided it would be best to relocate, which is how Briar came to finish his last years of high school in Agdoeg.
SAVVIES: hiking, gardening, camping, sightseeing, investigative work, problem solving, riddles and puzzles.
Powers & Abilities: Zodiac Empowerment (Sagittarius: enhanced accuracy, vision, tracking), Zodiac Physiology (see above appearance), Animal (deer) Spirit Summoning, Fthinóporokinesis (Autumn manipulation), Rot Inducement/Decaying Touch, Body Part Erosion, Luck, Evolution Manipulation, Supernatural Bowmanship.
Traits: (positive) Determined, intelligent, neat freak, health conscious, animal lover, usually down to earth, assertive, responsible, (negative) Sarcastic, impatient, untrusting, can have a temper when someone pushes him too far, distant, prioritizes work over everything else.
BACKGROUND CHECK:
Date of Birth: November 23rd
Date of Death: N/A
Crime Record: Most would assume someone has to have a clean slate to enter law enforcement, but that would leave slim pickings in a city like Agdoeg. Briar doesn’t have any outstanding criminal record, but he did have a couple of dings on his juvenile one that were expunged once he became a legal adult and, therefore, they can no longer be found in most databases.
Background/Biography
(tw miscarriage, tw immaculate conception by some strange god XD, tw domestic disputes, tw divorce) 
 Briar’s parents had been struggling to conceive a child for many years, since their prompt marriage right out of secondary school. These sweet hearts had longed to have a cookie cutter life and family, but fate seemed to inhibit that every step of the way. His mother have seven miscarriages due to the condition of an incompetent cervix and was told many times that she may never be able to carry a child to full term. This had been devastating news to the couple, who had no means of affording everything that went into surrogacy and were now facing the reality that they may never be able to have their own children. In spite of these odds, though, they kept trying and praying that whatever Gods that were out there might grant them a miracle.
Their prayers never seemed to be answered, though, and this put an understandable strain on their marriage. It was when his mother was thirty three and beginning to lose hope that she was plagued by a strange dream. She was floating in a vast emptiness, unable to move or even scream. This might have terrified someone else, but she somehow felt safe blanketed in the darkness. It was as if the entire universe lay bare before her, starlight dancing between her outstretched fingertips. Except she didn’t have fingers. She didn’t even have a physical body. There was a sense that she had become a part of something greater or perhaps been broken down into a form akin to what they had all been before the universe collided together in some cosmic firework show to create all that they knew. After what seemed like an eternity if time even passed in that world, the stars began to slowly take shape before her, pulled together by gravity or some other force she would never quite understand. As they converged, the light became so bright that it was nearly blinding, but she was space dust so how could she look away? She remembers trying to rationalize it with that absurd thought as the light shifted around her and the sound of harps and a heavenly chorus interrupted the sacred stillness that she’d been immersed in until then. Heralding the coming of something… or someone. The light came together at the peak of the crescendo, shapeless but she somehow got the sense of a shapely figure wrapped in a gown the longer she stared into it. This motherly figure bent over her and she recalled the warmth as its tendrils of light stroked over her cheek before urging her mouth open. In that moment, she didn’t feel any sense of unease as the being urged her to partake of its light. It traveled past her lips and through every corner of her being, rushing into her fingertips and even the ends of her hair. It was the first time since being in that plane that she had any sense of where she ended and the rest of the world began. The last thing she remembered was that light condensing, forming into its own little star in the lower part of her abdomen and radiating such soothing warmth…
Then she woke up and that was the first time she really had any sense of unease about the strange dream. As someone who had experienced how odd dreams could get during pregnancy, though, she took it as a good sign. Sure enough, when she took a test three weeks later, she was pregnant! Unlike prior, when she’d lost her children around the three month mark, this child was growing strong and without the complications she always worried about. Everything seemed to finally be falling into place. Their marriage and hope in the future was revitalized! And after nine months of perhaps the most physical and emotional pain she had ever been in in her entire life, she was welcoming a beautiful, healthy baby boy into the world and never once thought about the unsettling dream at the start of it all.
Admittedly, Briar was certainly a unique baby. His ears had always been a little odd since birth - bigger than usual - but his parents figured he would just grow into them and found it one of his most endearing traits. However, when he was three years old, that’s when his antlers started coming in. His mother found them one night when she was reading him a bedtime story and running her fingers through his unruly mop of wavy hair. Understandably, she freaked out and brought him to the doctor the next day, who took a biopsy and found the strange growths to primarily be made of calcium. It was unusual, but they decided to simply keep an eye on it since it seemed harmless enough. They only became more noticeable as the years went by, poking through his hair, and Briar recalls the Chinese Buddhists of his neighborhood always telling his mother it was a sign of good fortune. At the time, Briar had always thought it was annoying how they’d always want to lay their hands on him, but he realized as he’d gotten older that they believed the cow was Guanyin’s reincarnated father and the stubby little nubs atop his head made them think he was blessed. But horns and antlers are two different things - one being keratinous and, the other, bone - but he supposed it was easy to confuse them at first glance. Going into adolescence, those things grew like crazy. As if puberty and having velvety twigs growing on your head wasn’t stressful enough, that was when Briar first noticed his parents beginning to drift apart. One night, when coming home late from a friend’s house, he overheard a heated argument between them in the kitchen and his father’s accusations would forever be etched into his mind... “You thought you could trick me forever? I don’t know who knocked you up, but I can’t pretend that thing is my son!” The words drove through him like a knife. Yet after the initial shock subsided, Briar felt for the first time that all the little confusing pieces he’d chosen to overlook his entire life began to make sense. At first his parents had simply assumed he’d taken on more features of his mother, but his father had begun to grow distant as his otherworldly features and powers emerged. The reality was that two humans couldn’t possibly have made a half-deer-whatever-he-was and the only logical explanation was that he wasn’t his father’s at all. He only wished he’d come to that conclusion sooner instead of deluding himself and becoming foolishly attached to the man… The divorce was relatively swift. The judge didn’t even demand a paternity test when his father rebuked having to pay child support. All he had to do was look across the courtroom and he could tell that the speckled, big eared, horned child standing there wasn’t his. It was a dirty, unjust move that besmirched his mother as a disloyal wife and watching her go through that emotional rollercoaster was perhaps the toughest thing of the whole ordeal. Thirteen year old Briar comforted her through the fits of tears and had a strong upper lip when she insisted that she’d never betrayed his father… What bothered him the most was that he couldn’t believe her, but he also couldn’t be angry or blame her either. He had always been closer with his mother and he promised her in those moments of weakness that he would always take care of her. Of course, a single mother with a bad reputation was not an easy gig when trying to support a family. They were forced to move from their smaller town into the teeming metropolis of Bangkok for her to find work and Briar was honestly quite happy with leaving the past behind him. He thrived in the city with its far more diverse population. No one looked at him like he was a freak when he rode the bus or went to buy groceries. It was the first time he felt like he could truly be himself. He had his fair share of rough patches, just like any hormonal teenager, but having otherworldly powers and no one to teach you how to use them certainly caused a few catastrophic, social life obliterating faux pas. His mother thankfully was able to transfer within her company to the Agdoeg branch. It meant not only relocating in the middle of high school for Briar, but moving to an entirely new country. The level of diversity and integration of the supernatural community within Agdoeg was even better than what he’d experienced before. They were in government, owned small businesses… But not all of them were reputable or honest. Briar quickly learned that there were parts of the city that he shouldn’t venture to if he knew what was good for him. However, in spite of the seedier things going on in the underbelly, he was able to find a youth center which helped him to get a better handle on his powers and met his role model who would eventually lead him into his career as a police officer.
INTERVIEW QUESTION (para sample): “Just run us through what happened that night”. - Officer
Briar squeezed his eyes shut tight in an attempt to chase away the spots dancing across his vision from the overbearing fluorescent bulbs that bore down on the table in the center of the interrogation room. It was so intense that he could hear the hum of the electricity going to it and, somehow, he mentally processed that before the weight of the officer’s words. Words he’d uttered himself many times when the roles were flipped. Normally, this was the point a smart suspect would clam up and demand to talk to a lawyer, but clearly this was some kind of joke and he’d just missed the punchline. “Ha. Ha! Very funny.” He gruffed, devoid of amusement as he reached up to pinch the bridge of his nose to ward off the pounding headache settling in like someone was playing the bass drum behind his eyeballs.
The precinct had all been out drinking the night before, celebrating closing a case that had been busting their proverbial balls for the last six months, and there was a point after countless shots of tequila that Briar didn’t even know what was up and what was down, let alone why they were even there anymore. Now, he didn’t doubt that many profoundly stupid things had fallen from his lips and been done, but he hardly would have thought it would be anything illegal. Officers protected their own and someone less inebriated surely would have stopped him before he did anything he’d regret. Trying to wrack his brain, Briar bent to press his forehead to the cool metal of the table with a pitious groan. He remembered waking up in one of the cells to the sound of the door noisily being opened and before he could even get his bearings, two uniformed men were hauling him up and dragging him down the hallway toward the room he sat in now. None of it made a lick of sense.
“I’m afraid this isn’t a joke, Officer Suwannarat. Something very serious happened tonight and we need you to tell us why.”
The brutally stern voice sobered Briar up really quick and he lifted his head up from the table to narrow his eyes on the man that sat across from him, his fawn-like ears flicking in annoyance. He’d worked on the force for many years now and he wasn’t about to be hassled by some nameless rookie who was probably forced in here by his supervising officer, like a lamb being pushed into a cage with a bear. “Listen- no. What is going on?” He demanded with surprising eloquence for someone who’s tongue felt like a dried up sponge in his mouth. Drunk drought be damned. “Am I under arrest? ‘Cause if I am, you better tell me the charges or else I’m walking right out that door and finding your commanding off-”
What was likely going to be a memorable tirade was cut short as the door to the interrogation room swung open and a handful of officers poured into the small space like salmon all fighting to spawn upstream. All Briar could do was stare wide eyed where he was glued to his seat and watch with no small amount of mortification while a cake was set in front of him with messy lettering iced on top that read ‘Congrats on your Promotion! Now you’re their problem.’ Feeling the mixture of rage and bewilderment quickly begin to ebb away, the corners of Briar’s lips twitched into a crooked smile and he shook his head in exasperation. “You’re fucking kidding me. Who’s terrible idea was this?” He demanded with a mirthless laugh as he deflated back into the hard metal chair and glanced around at the familiar faces of the men and women he’d worked with for the past ten years. God, how had he survived their crazy antics and made it this far?
“What do you mean? We had to give you a memorable send-off.” His partner mounted his defense and slunk out from the crowd to give Briar an encouraging clap on the shoulder. “Besides, do you know how hard it was to carry your heavy ass into the cell to pull this off? The least you could do was say thank you. Geez. Too good for us already, Detective?”
Briar should thank him. That much he’d already mentally concluded. But shoving his partner’s smug face into the cake was also a tempting option. Instead, he reached up to gently pat the other’s hand with his gloved one. “Never.” He assured him gently before a chorus of obnoxious coos from the peanut gallery made sure to not only kill the moment but beat it once it was down. Pushing himself up from the chair, Briar swayed unsteadily and shamelessly grappled a couple of his friends for balance on his route to the door. “Ugh. Alright, get me out of this room before I literally end someone and get stuck here forever. That cake better be chocolate, I swear-”
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interesting-blog-name · 4 years ago
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Björk DISCOG REVIEW Part 1
One of the most recognized avant-garde singers in the world, Björk Guðmundsdóttir is an Icelandic artist who has been releasing critically acclaimed albums since the early 90s, and an icon in the experimental music scene. I thought it’d be an exciting experience to dive into her discography to find out if her music resonates with me, and to understand what this revered singer is all about. I decided to start with her major studio albums first, then moving on to her early work with Icelandic band The Sugarcubes and whatever else she has out there.
 Debut
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Björk’s properly titled debut is a wild amalgamation of sweet love songs, upbeat house music inspired by the UK’s early 90s scene, a hint of jazz, and of course, Björk’s enchanting voice. I won’t pretend to be a music university graduate or whatever, as I know close to nothing about what 90s music sounded like, what could have potentially influenced Björk on this album, nor will I try to give some sort of lecture about what is going on here; I’ll just cite what I enjoy and what I don’t, and why.
Debut feels authentic, it’s a finely crafted album, from its musical styles to its production to its songwriting. What spiked my interest immediately in it were the drums, and how fresh and varied they were; this is a very percussion-heavy album, the UK beats Björk implements are all about the infectious rhythms that enter your body and seem to control it, but even on tracks not so influenced by the nightclub life, the percussion is very good, in songs such as the opening Human Behaviour, with its fat bass drums, or the iconic, soothing Venus As a Boy, featuring tambourines, strong kicks, some rattle instrument, a prominent sampled echoing sound and a hint of bongos; these are all alongside various other rich instruments, violin passages that flow with the track perfectly, what sounds like xylophones peppering the track, all of this making this the best song in the album, in my opinion.
And when these instruments are not there, of course Björk herself makes up for it. Like Someone In Love is a beautiful ode to, well, love, comprised only of a harp, the singer’s eye-watering performance, and some ambient noise; it reminds me a bit too much of her cover of I Remember You, mostly because they’re both based on harps, but it is still very beautiful on its own. The Anchor Song is the emptiest on the record, closing the album up with some tension and overall introspection. It features only one verse from Björk sung two times, and like three saxophones? Definitely two at least, I’m not sure how they work, but it makes for a great, simplistic finisher (even if latter editions include Play Dead, a beautiful song, but not exactly fitting after the song before it).
Throughout the first handful of tracks, the pattern of “inward emotionally potent song sequenced by urban-life dance anthem, and back again” became apparent to me, but then broke after One Day did not transition into a dance track. Basically, my instant perception was that the record was this rollercoaster showcase of the hopeless romantic experience in a metropolitan, nocturnal city, and it may be, but if it is, it’s not as in-your-face as I initially thought. What catapulted these thoughts was the live version of There’s More To Life Than This, probably the most commercially-adept instrumental tune in the record, performed by Björk in a version purposefully awkward and weirdly personal, where she sings her second verse directly into a mic while the beat faintly plays in the background, fading further and further until the song flawlessly transitions to Like Someone In Love. It really makes you feel like your are at the Milk Bar, the night is packed, and Björk just pulls you into the bathroom and starts singing the rest of the song (for some reason); it reminded me of all those YouTube videos where the uploader takes a popular song, adds some background chatter, and soaks it all in reverb to give you the experience of listening to the song from the bathroom of a party. It is a distinct, creative way of spinning the original dance track around into something more, something that conveys this feeling of slight loneliness, even when surrounded by people, the central topic of the second song, Crying. The lyrics describe the big city, the huge crowds, but conversely the feeling of solitude and missing your loved one, or maybe even a place, it’s not explicitly told who or what Björk misses.
Romance is ever-present in Debut, through many incarnations. Big Time Sensuality, one of the most upbeat tracks here, is about a fresh romantic relationship, and the growing sensation of “something important (...) about to happen”, assumingly between Björk and whoever else. The house beat paints the scenario for this relationship as a club, by default. It brings you into this exciting nightlife, only for you to be pulled away immediately after by One Day, a track so cheerful it’s irresistible, and holding tight to the theme of romanticizing a loved one, then reaching Aeroplane in yet another beautiful transition. I have to admit this is the first song I don’t love in the album, I think it is good, and in the context of the album, definitely brings something new. What sets it apart is, this time around, the bongos are being used to their full extent, paired with birds chirping and a comfortable bass, incremented by occasional saxophone passages, this track ends up very tropical. After this, Come To Me is another passionate song, this time, Björk sings of comforting her partner and nurturing them, which naturally creates a super chill aura to the song. Accompanied by the violins and the lowkey guitars, it makes for a solid track, which in the context of the album I think eases the mood a bit too much, but is appreciated as a solid production, and closes out by bringing out the bongos once again, in a very nice outro (I should also note this is the first appearance of a real drum set on the album [I think]) (I should also also note the bassline sounds a little like early studio versions of True Love Waits by Radiohead, just some trivia).
Violently Happy right afterwards is the least interesting of the house tracks, with a mostly simple instrumental, and vocals Björk seeming to be compressed, or dowsed in some other effect. It’s not a standout in the tracklist to me, but the beauty of Debut is that the worst song is still solid as fuck. I think it’s a very consistent album, that delivers a unique and one-of-a-kind experience.
I didn’t expect this type of sound from Debut, but I was pleasantly surprised. It took me a while to like, but it definitely grew on me on with this 4 a.m. listening session I just had. I look forward to everything else I will listen to by Björk.
 FAVORITE TRACKS: Venus As A Boy, Like Someone In Love, One Day, Big Time Sensuality, Human Behaviour
LEAST FAVORITE TRACK: Violently Happy
 8.7/10
“Lately I find myself gazing at stars, hearing guitars like someone in love.”
 Post
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Going into Post, I was aware this would be quite different from Debut. I had listened to Army of Me and It’s Oh So Quiet before, seeing as they’re two of Björk’s biggest songs, and they obviously sound nothing like the acid house beats and soft, calming ballads in her debut, and that’s what is good about it, the sudden shift from a relatively safe musical environment to aggressive, chunky electronic production in Army of Me and Enjoy, and the absolute turnaround that is It’s Oh So Quiet.
The bold production decisions are what make this album exciting and surprising, in tracks such as I Miss You, mixing a synth-line with super loud bongos and some addictive synthesized drums, and trumpets at the end of the song, or the famous use of the Locrian mode in Army of Me, creating this menacing, dissonant melody, which perfectly fits the song and serves as an appropriate intro to the album that succeeds it. But they don’t always have to be out there to be notable and great: what I can tell from around the internet is that you can ask every single Björk fan ever what their favorite track by her is and it feels like at least a quarter will answer Hyper-ballad, and (even though I’m not nearly done with her discography) I can I say it’s with very good reason, as it is an amazingly composed song; same with Possibly Maybe, an enheartened slow jam which progresses from a cute love song about desiring to be with the one she’s flirting with, to disappointment in how they treat her, to the breakup, where she states she started wearing lipstick again, sucking her own tongue in remembrance of her once lover.
The album is very love-centered, specifically focused on the desire to be physically with someone, with how Björk mentions her love interest’s touch in plenty of tracks, such as I Miss You, a song about missing someone she apparently has never been with, where she literally asks her significant other “when will I get my cuddle?”. uwu.
(also what is this cover art lmao)
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Also including this thirst for deeper contact are the songs Enjoy (“I wish I’d only look, and didn’t have to touch”, “How can I ignore? This is sex without touching?”) and Headphones (”They start off as cells that haven’t been touched before, these cells are virgins”), but the subject matter isn’t always literal and spelled out, as the tracks Isobel and Hyper-ballad seem to play with the idea of a hermit lifestyle, whether it’s at the top of a mountain or in the heart of a forest, with different meanings between the two, however. In Hyper-ballad, she’s isolated from the world alongside her lover, while in Isobel, she’s completely alone, married to herself, as she says. I enjoy the theme, but I think the vocals and instrumentation, while interesting, aren’t as good as many other examples from the album, same with the track previous to it, You’ve Been Flirting Again, which employs very faint and uniform violins under some soothing yet stagnant lyrics by Björk; it serves mostly as an interlude, I suppose, but it could go a little further, in my opinion.
To end the album, Cover Me and Headphones subdue the atmosphere by a lot. They’re very toned down, the first features some really nice windy background noise, and what I think is an oud. It’s an amazing section of the album, and from what I can gather, seems to be about her own experimentation with her music, describing a journey into what I think is this very album, a big departure from Debut for sure. It then transitions seamlessly into Headphones, which, on par with its title, is a much better experience if you are wearing headphones. The buzzing bass, Björk’s nearly ASMR vocals turning into gibberish at the end, and bubbly percussion are all super pleasing to the ears, and it continues the theme of her own musical creating process, singing how her headphones saved her life, and how nothing will ever be the same; it’s almost prophetical, and definitely one of my favorite songs here.
Post is much more colorful, daring and wild than Debut, but I don’t know if I like it better than its predecessor. I feel like Debut is obviously much more comfortable and pleasing than Post, and that even though Post has amazing tracks like Hyper-ballad, Enjoy and Possibly Maybe, as an album, I’m not really feeling it as much as the last one. The sense of cohesion in the last one, and how it used the UK beats to the best of their potentials, mixing them with much more soothing tracks and beautiful vocal performances is what attracts me to it so much. I really appreciate the direction Post took, as I don’t suppose many people were doing anything close to this in the 90s or before, and it certainly has its highlights, but I think Debut just got a tighter hold of me, and I just enjoyed it more, if looking at it from a purely superficial standpoint. The experimentation here is great, but I enjoy how fresh Debut sounds slightly more.
 FAVORITE TRACKS: Hyper-ballad, I Miss You, Army of Me, Headphones, Possibly Maybe, Enjoy
LEAST FAVORITE TRACK: You’ve Been Flirting Again
 8.5/10
“This is really dangerous, cover me. But worth all the effort, cover me.”
 Homogenic
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Alright shit got real.
This is way better than the last two albums, and they were amazing to begin with. But this album is insane. It’s focused, but also so loose and free. It’s an amazing experience, and I think Björk in her most comfortable style yet. She doesn’t miss the mark in one track of this album, they’re all at the very least good.
It starts off with the delirious drum patterns and violins in Hunter, and I tell you, I haven’t seen a better streak of amazing songs in an album yet: from the intro to 5 Years, all the songs between it are fucking fantastic, and that is only broken by Immature, a track which I don’t think is supposed to be much more than an interlude anyway; then it’s right back with Alarm Call.
I really don’t think I have anything to complain about in this review apart from 5 Years and Immature. On the first listen, I thought Howie B’s version of All Is Full Of Love was inferior to the original, which I had heard and loved a while ago, but I can’t even say that, because this one is perfect as an outro. With the drums gone, the track feels like a goodbye from Björk as you slowly descent from heaven after listening to this album; plus, it comes right after Pluto, by far the most aggressive song in Homogenic, with the singer yelling over her glitchiest production yet. Then it suddenly gives way to that incredible outro. Other amazing transitions include Unravel to Bachelorette, decorated by the overlapping violins, and from 5 Years to Immature. The serene, gorgeous sound of Unravel against the energetic, cinematic Bachelorette orchestra is easily one of the best moments in the album as well.
I find that whenever I find an album really good, I have problems describing why, but I promise this time I’ll try harder than when I listened to MAGDALENE. To start, Björk’s singing and the instruments backing her have never been more in harmony with each other, mainly due to Björk’s and her producers’ focus on maintaining a homogenous sound throughout the record, as its title implies, and this style is the mix of strings and other orchestral instruments (including an accordion at some points) with the odd, sometimes glitchy (All Neon Like, 5 Years, Pluto) other times fleshed out and bulky (Hunter, Immature, Alarm Call) production of Mark Bell, Guy Sigsworth, Howie B, Markus Dravs and, of course, Björk herself. Jóga and Unravel are my favorite Björk songs so far, and the fact that they come back to back, right before Bachelorette, is still crazy to me.
Alarm Call is a beautiful song about how your music impacts the world, and just an anthem of euphoria basically, which might be a little out of place surrounded by the very specific sound the album goes for, with its bop qualities and dance rhythm, but I appreciate it a lot just for how easily Björk can pour her feelings onto a track and make it work out of seemingly nowhere. This song demands happiness from the listener, and it’s extremely difficult not to give in to its groove (“I’m no fucking Buddhist, but this is enlightenment”).
In my opinion, All Neon Like is the perfect embodiment of Homogenic’s atmosphere: it’s not as brilliantly and enormously produced as the songs before it, but it is frigid and ethereal, the lyrics are sung fairy tales, continuing the genius metaphors in Bachelorette.
It’s slightly futile for me to try and dissect Björk’s lyrics one by one, but they do stand out more than in her previous records as well, even though the focus on Homogenic is mainly in its aesthetic. 5 Years is the first song that features lyrics that point themselves against someone, a former love interest of Björk, accusing them of not being able to handle her, and while Immature’s lyrics don’t go anywhere due to them consisting of a verse repeated twice, they follow the theme of abandoning a lover, and this time, the questioning is to herself, wondering how she thought her significant other was a cure to all her personal issues. Hunter, an amazing intro to an amazing album, centers its lyrics around some of the same topics as the outro in Post (Cover Me and Headphones) which describes a voyage into the unknown that was Björk’s musical endeavors at the time, her will to go the distance to create something brand new and exciting. In this intro, she compares it to hunting and bringing the food to the table. It starts: “If travel is searching and home what’s been found, I’m not stopping”. It’s fucking brilliant man holy shit.
Now that I write this, I realize, from 5 Years onward, the songs cease to be about idolizing another person, with tracks such as Immature and Alarm Bell being introspective looks at Björk and her current feelings, and Pluto being about batshit self-change. Even All Is Full Of Love, with its first lyrics being “You’ll be given love, you’ll be taken care of”, seems to be addressing more of the ambient surrounding the person than the person themselves, as if they’re a placeholder for all the angelic ambience around the listener. Maybe the song is literally about placing the listener in this scenario, who knows.
Definitely best album I’ve heard yet, and what excites me is that people praise the next album so much, I’ve never seen someone talk much about Homogenic. I literally don’t know how Björk can top this, but I’ll see.
 WORST TO BEST: 5 Years, Immature – Mark Bell’s Version, Hunter, Pluto, Alarm Call, All Neon Like, Bachelorette, All Is Full Of Love – Howie’s Version, Jóga, Unravel
 Fuck it, 10/10
“I’m a path of cinders burning under your feet. You’re the one who walks me, I’m your one-way street.”
 Vespertine
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I am pleased.
This is insane, man. I think I’ll be a huge Björk fan after I’m finished with this discography. Vespertine is meticulous, it’s enchanting, it’s all-around wonderful. You can tell Björk and her team put incredible effort into this album, for it to sound as effortlessly beautiful as possible; not one idea or song here sounds forced, out of its element, or simply put bad. They unite to create one of the most astounding listening experiences I think I’ll ever get in my life.
Vespertine is proud, but introverted. As a sequel to Homogenic, it serves as its lighter half: where Björk described Homogenic as “confrontational”, “active” and “warrior”, Vespertine flips that upside down, and brings microbeats, music boxes and harps to the table. This is a very effective alternative to songs such as Jóga and Bachelorette, where the instrumentals and the singer seemed to try and outdo each other, creating these grand, empowering songs; in this album, they merge together into living, breathing and deeply personal lullabies. One of the most impressive talents of Björk is that she seems to take the identity of her album to heart, and mixes her unique songwriting and singing talents and her otherworldly personality into the project’s own personality, becoming an artform much greater than the sum of its parts.
Songs like Hidden Place, It’s Not Up To You and Pagan Poetry are Björk to the bone, with their more elaborate and ear-catching production, their humongous vocals, and would be comfortable if they were to be pulled from this album into another; however, deeper cuts such as Aurora, Cocoon, Undo and An Echo A Stain are the embodiment of this album’s aesthetic, its frigid atmosphere and tiny, fragile surroundings. They are like symmetrical, unique snowflakes when softer, or huge, arctic blue glistering caves when grander. They’re precise; stable, but at the same time would not work if they weren’t organized exactly how they are.
It’s easy to get too comfortable listening to Vespertine. The tracks are almost spiritual in a way, they convey an unparalleled bliss to the listener, and getting lost in the album is almost part of the experience. Especially in the second half of Vespertine, where things get real lowkey. Songs merge into each other, starting with the wonderful music box interlude Frosti into Aurora, which features one of Björk’s strongest vocal performances, proceeding to An Echo A Stain, a standout for its weird, suspenseful and eerie instrumental, evoking a dark vibe, it sounds like a deep underwater exploration into the darkest abysses of the ocean or some shit. The lyrics are also uniquely confrontational, they don’t portray the undying passion of songs before it, instead proclaiming “Don’t say no to me. You can’t say no to me. I won’t see you, denied.”. With all the vague and spacey lyrics, and the uneventful instrumental, it’s impressive this song progresses so well, mainly due to its weird, unsettling tone that sets itself apart from the rest of the songs. In a way, these odd and abstract lyrics mixed with the ethereal and bittersweet instrumentation remind me of some Radiohead songs, such as The National Anthem, How To Disappear Completely and Ful Stop, and I’m realizing this is a style of music I’m prone to liking.
Sun In My Mouth is not much of a standout topically or sonically to me, as it doesn’t do much to expand upon the sexuality of the album, with lyrics once again referring to inserting fingers into wherever, and closing with “Will I complete the mystery of my flesh?”, the themes seem to have nowhere to go. Heirloom depicts a reoccurring dream about Björk losing her voice, and having her mother and son pour a glowing oil into her mouth, which is a cute and artsy way of saying they’re her fuel for continuing with her craft, I guess. The lyrics don’t go anywhere with themselves after this though, but the instrumental is very creative and memorable, it creates a neat little bubble of involving, resonating synths.
Employing some heavy strings for Harm Of Will, Björk doubles down on the romance of the album, in a rather stripped-down song, with a few vocal highlights from her. It finds its place in the tracklist, I guess, although the oral sex line comes off a bit too strong for the smooth sentiment of the song.
To close Vespertine off, Unison, the longest song in the album, lays back on an ambient sample by Oval, and features one of Björk’s most unique vocal harmonies on its chorus; overall a nice, upbeat outro for a wonderful album.
I will say I felt more excited listening to Homogenic, as I think Vespertine’s romantic, sexual aura doesn’t expand into much after some of the many heavily sensual verses, while Homogenic wasn’t as tight and claustrophobic for me. Vespertine, however, was freer and left a bigger impact on me, It’s Not Up To You succeeded in making me cry. At the same time, none of the songs here felt like they didn’t belong, like they took away from the experience; every sound and line collaborates to make something bigger, something I don’t think I’ll get from many other albums in my lifetime.
 BEST TO WORST: It’s Not Up To You, Pagan Poetry, Undo, Hidden Place, An Echo A Stain, Unison, Aurora, Heirloom, Cocoon, Harm Of Will, Frosti, Sun In My Mouth
 It is a 10
“I can decide what I give, but it’s not up to me what I get given. Unthinkable surprises about to happen, but what they are, it’s not up to you.”
 Medúlla
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Björk’s 2004 Medúlla is, surprise surprise, an acapella album. And to further surprise, I liked it.
After Homogenic and Vespertine, I guess there was nowhere to go but towards the more experimental. You can’t really outdo those two albums in their own game, so you gotta branch out, try different things; and trying different things is exactly what Björk excels at, apparently. With Medúlla, all that wild, bombastic or serene instrumentation her previous albums were peppered with is gone, giving way to backing vocals ranging from super deep male bass to angelic choirs, beatboxing, and occasionally an isolated instrument. The album is rooted on the most primary form of music: barely any instruments, almost no effects or audio manipulations, just many voices uniting to become one; lyrics about childbirth, the human body, oceans and, of course, love.
Listening to Medúlla is interesting because it is very familiar, while also being a completely different experience from Björk’s previous albums. Songs like Who Is It and Mouth’s Cradle are unmistakably her, while at the same time being coated with an extra layer of experimentation, and with this new direction, Björk and her team are able to channel an energy that stands shoulder-to-shoulder with some of her best production. Where Is The Line? and Oceania are intricate and complex, showing just how much can be done with only the human voice. The low male vocals and beatboxing structure the songs, the choirs in the background give them depth, all the sounds link with themselves to amount to some incredible songs.
On the flipside, however, few songs fail to achieve that, in my opinion. Desired Constellation is notably bare and empty, with few aspects to its composition. The mystical lyrics that characterize Medúlla are still here, describing Björk playing routinely with stars to form whatever she desires, but apart from that, there isn’t much to experience. Mouth’s Cradle and its successor Miðvikudags are also not of much significance to the rest of the album, as they drift from its acapella compositions by employing some pleasant, but unnecessary synths as the basis of the songs. The simpler, shorter interludes that are peppered through the album are pretty much the standard sound for this record, fleshing it out with small little vocal passages and, of course, gibberish. Show Me Forgiveness, from my interpretation, is Björk apologizing to either herself or her daughter (as implied by the last line, “The girl might live”), for letting her interior voice be drowned out by the exterior; Öll Birtan is a simple buildup to the aforementioned Who Is It, but the best of the bunch are Sonnets/Unrealities XI, the poem it may not always be so; and i say by e. e. cummings over some of the best backing vocals in the album, Vökuró, where Björk sings a traditional Icelandic song in a very intimate and gorgeous moment in the album, and Ancestors, which features some passionate, odd and intriguing growls all throughout it.
It’s remarkable what Björk came up with in this album, the mystical aura surrounding it and forming its lyrics, in particular the verses in Oceania where she takes the role of the Ocean, exploring its perspective of Earth, time and the continents, Pleasure Is All Mine, which describes motherhood and childbirth for a sublime intro, and Submarine, featuring Robert Wyatt, evoking a sense of rebelliousness and urgency. Great album.
 FAVORITE TRACKS: Oceania, Sonnets/Unrealities XI, Where Is The Line? Pleasure Is All Mine, Vökuró
LEAST FAVORITE TRACK: Mouth’s Cradle
 8.8/10
“When in doubt: give”
Outro
I postponed ths review for like 2 months or something, I don’t even know. Basically, from Debut to Vespertine was probably a one-month span of time, while it took me about double that time to actually write about Medúlla, because of what I think was a depressive episode. In the meantime, I started just reviewing shit on RateYourMusic (my username is fantaguarana, if anyone cares). I thought of stopping, I had this feeling that the whole “writing about everything I listen” thing was really forced and starting to become a chore, but now that I actually got to it, I think I notice how much it helps me organize my thoughts on music, compared to just listening to an album and never really reflecting on what it really means.
I’ll probably stop writing about everything I listen to, and leave this blog for the albums that really change me as a person. Have a good day yall.
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idolish7rabbitchats · 4 years ago
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Yuki: Wonderful Octave Rabbit Chat Part 2
Tsumugi: Everyone, thank you for gathering!  I thought that I would collect requests for “RADIO STATION ‘Twelve Hits!’” here.
Tsumugi: I’ll manage the chat this time too. Everyone, please take care of it!
Momo: Everyone, please take care of us today~ \(*´ ∀ `)/
Okazaki: Everyone, thank you for taking the time when you’re busy.
Anesagi: It’s like him when his partner and manager showed up before him.
Momo: Yuki is the main this time, so I couldn’t wait! I was holding my phone all morning on stand-by. ☆
Okazaki: Momo-kun, even though you had the day off, you visited the agency.
Momo: Even though it would’ve been fine from my own house since it’s a group chat. Lol But it’s cuz you said Yuki would come~!
Gaku: Speaking of, he hasn’t said a word yet huh?
Mitsuki: Yuki-san, you’re here right?!
Yuki: I’m here.
Yuki: I was healed by Momo and Okarin’s cute conversation.
Yuki: Take care of me today. ^ ^
Yamato: You’re too chill.
Riku: As expected of Re:vale-san! You’re friendly today too huh! 
Nagi: It’s a wonderful thing that you’re friendly. :-)
Tsumugi: It’s only been a few seconds and I already felt Re:vale-san’s deep bond…!
Tsumugi: So then, I think I’ll move on to collecting the requests. This time too, we’re going from the youngest so we’ll ask from Tamaki-san!
Tamaki: Ye
Tamaki: Yuki-rin, try taking an English test.
Yuki: Did you have a test in school?
Tamaki: Yea. I got it super wrong on a test recently.
Tamaki: It really pissed me off that Iorin sighed and said, “You can’t even do this” so
Tamaki: I’ll show him that adults can’t do it either!
Yuki: Tamaki-kun thinks I’m a stupid character?
Iori: I had to keep him company during his detention. Please at least let me sigh.
Tamaki: I said it was fine for you to go home first.
Iori: If I left you, we wouldn’t have made it on time for the recording right. (Mad)
Mitsuki: But, Tamaki’s incorrect answers are kinda cute! Like on a quiz show or something.
Yamato: Oh yeah, recently on that elementary level kanji quiz, he answer strong “rock” for strong “ishi” huh. (lol)
Nagi: “Rock” and “will” huh!  Japanese homophones are complicated huh. :-( [T/N: In Japanese, both “rock” (石) and “will” (意思) are read as “ishi” but they have different kanji so where Yamato says “ishi,” it was written in hiragana, hence why Tamaki answered with the kanji for “rock” instead of “will.”]
Tamaki: Rocks are strong right! They’re hard!
Momo: For variety shows, that’s a perfect answer っ(・∀・)=b
Yuki: I also think Tamaki-kun’s answer is right though.
Yuki: That’s the answer where I could feel Tamaki-kun’s strong will.
Tamaki: Yukirinnnnnnnnnn
Tamaki: [Confetti Pudding Stamp]
Tenn: Yuki-san, was that a joke?
Sogo: Tamaki-kun, I’ll also join you in studying for the next test.
Tamaki: [Turned Away Kinako Stamp]
Tsumugi: Tamaki-san, Iori-san, good work in detention…!
Tsumugi: Next is the request from Iori-san please!
Iori: From me, “Please try playing a new musical instrument.”
Iori: When we talk about Yuki-san, we have an image of him being good at playing any kind of instrument, not only making songs. Maybe there are a lot of fans who want to see you try some unique instrument I think?
Yuki: Heeh. Sounds interesting.
Yuki: The musical instruments challenge in IDOLiSH Night! is famous huh.
Momo: But, is there an instrument in this world that Yuki can’t play?!
Yuki: There should be. ^^
Ryuunosuke: If you want a unique one, how about the Sanshin from Okinawa? It’s easy to play for beginners, and I want to see Yuki-san playing that!
Yuki: Was that an instrument like Syamisen?
Iori: They’re different but Yuki-san is good at playing the guitar so it might be easy to try a similar string instrument. 
Ryuunosuke: Yuki-san seems suited to a Ryuso too… I’ll teach you how to wear it! [T/N: An Okinawan kimono.]
Yuki: I’m interested but it’s on the radio so they can’t see huh.
Ryuunosuke: Oh yeah. lol
Riku: If it’s a string instrument, you might also be suited to a violin!
Mitsuki: That sounds like a celebrity, and it would really suit you!
Anesagi: It’s elegant huh..!
Nagi: We already have an elegant character :-(
Yamato: It’s fine no matter how many people there are right. (lol)
Momo: Speaking of elegant instruments, Yuki would be super suited to a harp!
Momo: All the girls in the world would like Yuki~!
Banri: Wouldn’t it be too funny because the harp would suit Yuki too much?
Yuki: And, even though I would have the best facial expression, I can’t play at all.
Iori: It would suit him well but it would be hard to bring into the radio studio...
Tsumugi: Any instruments sound interesting, it’s hard to choose…! Please let me consult with you later about the plan.
Tsumugi: Next is the request from Riku-san please.
Riku: From me, “Let me read the lines on your palm!”
Riku: One day, someone read my palm on a tv show, and it was quite interesting. So after the shoot, I downloaded a palmistry app!
Yuki: Riku-kun would read my palm?
Riku: Yes! If you send me your palm’s photo, I’ll look for it before the radio recording day!
Yuki: Amazing. A fortune-telling idol.
Tenn: Since a long time ago, Riku’s been interested in funny things. 
Sogo: We need at least one skill since we’re idols. He’ll use an app this time, but he would actually learn it one day and it would become his strength.
Gaku: A palmistry app huh. That sounds interesting. 
Riku: I’ll send the URL! 
Tamaki: But it’s not right at all.
Tamaki: I saw it earlier.
Riku: Eh?! That’s not true!
Iori: Didn’t you say “You are careful and a late bloomer. Would be embarrassed from looking into  other people’s eyes” while looking at Yotsuba-san’s palm?
Yuki: Isn’t it too opposite?
Riku: The app said that..!
Mitsuki: It’s more like the app’s skill than Riku’s. lol
Yuki: I’m actually looking forward to how wrong the results would be though.
Yamato: If it’s Yuki-san, wouldn’t it say something like “A philanthropist who cares about people.” Lol
Yuki: I care about people and I’m a philanthropist.
Riku: Yuki-san’s nice huh!
Momo: Anyways, this conversation is having same vibes as when there was a psychology test request for me lolololol
Tenn: Riku, isn’t it better to organize your apps. You’d said your phone was lagging but maybe that’s why. 
Riku: Eeeh!
Tsumugi: There’s a lot of interesting apps huh! I’ll also try looking up various things!
Tsumugi:  So then, can I ask for the request from Kujou-san?
Tenn: From me it’s, “I want you to sing while playing a guitar.”
Tenn: I want to hear it too, and the fans would also be happy.
Sogo: Singing while playing the guitar on the radio, it has a special feeling huh. I need to prepare for the recording...
Gaku: The on-air date is close to the eve so a Christmas song would probably make people happy huh.
Yuki: Tenn-kun, do you have a song request?
Tenn: I’ll leave picking the song to Yuki-san. An impromptu, or a song in your repertoire; if it’s anything you play, I would be happy with any song.
Yuki: That’s cute to say. ^ ^
Tsumugi: Being able to listen to Yuki-san’s guitar playing would be gorgeous…!
Yuki: By the way Maneko-chan, do you have a request?
Tsumugi: Eh! Me?!
Yuki: Let me hear it as a reference.
Tsumugi: It’s my personal opinion, but let me see...
*Tsumugi: Someone already said this but, I think a Christmas song would be wonderful!
Yuki: It’s perfect for December and it might be a good atmosphere to bring out. It seems it would give everyone special feelings. 
Tsumugi: Even if it’s only a little, it would be nice if it could become a hint..!
Yuki: Thanks. It became a reference.
Momo: It’s a request that you got from Tenn so it would be interesting if Yuki made a song about your feelings toward Tenn!
Yuki: Feelings toward Tenn-kun huh...
Yuki: You are always polite and cute kouhai~ ♪
Yuki: But you’re cool and professional on stage~ ♪
Yuki: You were happy when I gave you a strawberry daifuku~♪
Yuki: It made me happy too~ ♪
Yuki: I want to bury Tenn-kun in strawberries~ ♪
Yuki: That kind of feeling?
Momo: That’s super good but, I want one more thing…! I want to feel the Tenn that only Yuki knows..!
Yuki: That’s a difficult request. That hyped me up.
Tenn: Um, it’s fine not to go that far.
Tenn: Also, no thanks to the strawberries that you would bury me in.
Yuki: Even the tsun parts are ~cute~ ♪
Tsumugi: Kujou-san’s song by Yuki-san, as one of his fans, it would be super interesting too..!
Tsumugi: So then, next is the request from Nagi-san please!
Nagi: From me it’s, “Please emphasize your part that you like the most!”
Nagi: Lots of Japanese people are reserved. How about Mister Yuki represent and become a model to appeal to your charms ?
Yuki: It’s not like I don’t have any parts I like and I don’t have any hesitancy to say it but 
Yuki: But people envy me when I say it.
Yuki: Even though I’m just telling the truth.
Nagi: Mister Yuki… I can really understand that sadness… Men are jealous of beautiful men. 
Nagi: But, let the jealous men be jealous of us. It’s a sin to hide these beautiful talents.
Yuki: It sounded heavy when Nagi-kun said that.
Iori: It doesn’t need to be about your face right…?
Gaku: Right. It’s about the part you like the most, so your personality would be nice too right?
Nagi: OH. 
Yuki: I’ll think about it.
Tsumugi: Personally, I’m really curious about your favorite face parts…! Lol
Tsumugi: Next is the request from Sogo-san please!
Sogo: Yes. From me, “Please tell me if there is anything you care about when you are making songs.”
Sogo: Not only as an idol but you are a big senpai as a composer too. I would be happy if I can hear how you prepare to face the music.
Yuki: That’s THE Sogo-kun kind of request huh.
Sogo: Since the radio project started, I was thinking of this as Yuki-san’s request! 
Yuki: From that long ago?
Tamaki: So-chan, you were keeping that for 12 months?
Yamato: Could age wine. (lol)
Mitsuki: Could also do cheese though!
Ryuunosuke: It was raised carefully huh! 
Yuki: Even though you could have asked the question at any other time like when we passed in a hallway.
Sogo: No way..! I can’t ask your precious opinion in a hallway …!
Yuki: You don’t have to be that nervous.
Riku: Sougo-san is frozen while sitting up straight…! 
Riku: On the sofa!
Sogo: Ri-Riku-kun, don’t say that...
Riku: [Sweating Pudding Stamp]
Gaku: Isn’t sitting formally on the sofa a bit too stiff? 
Yuki: Sougo-kun, you’re in the i7 dorms?
Yuki: If you want to hear it so badly, should I go over there now and talk with you?
Sogo: No no no no! It’s nothing! 
Sogo: I’ll wish if you’ll pull my request, secretly in my heart...
Sogo: [Sweating Pudding Stamp]
Yuki: I’ll answer Sougo-kun’s request even if I don’t pull it.
Yuki: Next time, let’s go drinking.
Sogo: Th-Thank you very much! 
Banri: Sougo-kun you’ll get in trouble so it would be better not to drink.
Yuki: That’s an old story right.
Tenn: Excuse me. Can we take a little break?
Tenn: Gaku’s phone doesn’t seem to be doing well.  
Ryuunosuke: It suddenly froze huh..!
Ryuunosuke: Gaku is shaking his phone so hard!
Anesagi: It’s not like an old TV that you could fix by hitting it...
Tenn: Gaku, you are too irritated.
Tsumugi: I got it! I hope his phone will be better...
Tsumugi: I’d be happy if you told me if it’s alright!
Ryuunosuke: Got it! (lol)
V2:
T: It’s my personal opinion, but let me see...
T: Since it’s close to your birthday, how about a birthday song!
Y: Singing congratulations to myself? Isn’t that lonely?
T: Even if it’s only a little, it would be nice if it could become a hint..!
V3:
T: It’s my personal opinion, but let me see...
T: How about an impromptu song?
Y: Making a song out of the feelings from that time huh. It would feel like a live and it would be  interesting.
T:  Even if it’s only a little, it would be nice if it could become a hint..!
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griffinsandpeacocks · 4 years ago
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GET UP & WRITE! Section 1: “I love you, but I don’t even think I know who you really are.”
“The lunar fall festival is coming swiftly. I would like you to play as the Lunar Queen.” Elrond says looking at Erestor who promptly snaps his quill and destroys the parchment he’d been working on in the resulting splatter of black ink. He sets the now destroyed work and quill aside wipes clean his hand on the rag near by for it and calmly looks up at his old friend and now his trusted Lord.
“Excuse me?” Erestor asks calmly certain he’d misheard as his views of the festivals were clear. He would over see them to be sure they were set up properly and all was in order but he would only stay at them so long as he was required. Which was thankfully a small window of time. 
“I want you to be the Lunar Queen.” Elrond says and Erestor can feel the tick in his brow. He sighs and rubs at his forehead.
“Elrond... You know full well I don’t like being at the center of attention.” Erestor says strained.
“I know. However, I long to hear you sing again, it’s been dark as of late and I feel we should remind everyone here that every last one of us is capable of many things a scribe might know how to play an instrument or perhaps a warrior is a talented poet, the dower chief Councilor is in fact a song bird.” Elrond explains and Erestor sighs and nods. It was a good reason he supposed but to have come now of all times right after Glorfindel had returned to Arda, to serve Elrond and his line. 
“Alright.” He sighs and Elrond beams.
“Good! I’ll tell Linder he’s in charge this year.” Also you’ll manage your parts correct?” Elrond asks and the dark haired elf nods and watches Elrond smile and skip off. He groans and throws the destroyed work in his trash before standing and stalking off to gather what he’ll need. Better it be handled now so he can focus as much as possible on his work leading up to the dammed event. Glorfindel is sheepishly talking with the seamstress when he arrives.
“Elrond cast you as the Sun King?” He asks and Glorfindel jumps and looks at the dark cloud of an elf and nods. Erestor growls and looks at the seamstress.
“I’ll be playing the Lunar Queen have you two settled on designs yet? I’ll help if not. I need this all sorted so I can go back to work.” She pursed her lips.
“Elrond’s doing his thing again?” She asks and Erestor nods and she winced.
“Well so far we know he’ll need blues as not only will they compliment Lord Glorfindel well, they’ll match the sky. Other than that we haven’t discussed quite yet.” She says and Erestor nods. He looks at the other then the seamstress and they go into a flurry of chatter as Erestor helps her design the outfit and soon the design is drawn up, with bits in put from Glorfindel here and there. 
“Now you’ll just need the glittering jewelry to go with it. There’s a few props stored away you can look through or we can find something unique, I’ll show you if you don’t know where those are but first I’ll need to create my costume.” He is agitated still and Glorfindel nods gesturing him to continue as he moves back and gives a nervous grin.
“I’ll help if you’d like, but this is not my strong suit.” Glorfindel says and Erestor gives him a flat look his silver eyes cuttingly cold.
“I would have never guessed.” The darkling says and looks at the seamstress.
“We’ll need dark colors, highlighted with pale silver possibly weave gems in to make stars and their patterns over the outer robes... Hmm... Or I can do that with my hair... I know of a pretty little circlet that should work well enough... It’s been used before but it should serve well. Can you do an outfit based around it? I can either fetch it or draw it for you?” Erestor says and She describes it Erestor smiles and nods.
“Aye that one.” He says and She smiles and sketches a few ideas and shows him and he picks them apart combining them into one out fit she sketches out again and he nods. He leads Glorfindel to the closet that holds all the supplies for those playing the parts for festivals and finds his circlet and smiles at it, swirls reminiscent of water cupping a crescent moon a small gem drop dangling down  imbued to glow like a little star. Glorfindel is looking through the ones made of gold and sighs. He can’t think of any of these with the elegant outfit they had made for him.
“None of these seem to do the costume you helped design justice...” Glorfindel sighs and Erestor looks over.
“They’re rather tacky. I can admit. I can see if any smith has the availability to make something that won’t be as bad.” He offers and Glorfindel smiles.
“It be best someone else... Everyone seems to throw other important matters to the fire when they see me... Why I’ve no clue... I did what any warrior would have to protect his people... Duilin died on his wall with his men to try and stem the tide betrayed like so many... Yet somehow I’m special?” Glorfindel asks sneering and Erestor shrugs.
“They are young, you are a reborn legend. Your sacrifice is not diminished by you’re return nor was it any less than what the others who died gave. You were merely returned to serve Turgon’s line.” Erestor states and the golden elda smiles at him.
“Thank you for the normalcy. it is rare and I hate it that so few can behave as you have.” Glorfindel says and Erestor scoffs.
“An elf’s measure is in their heart I know nothing of yours save tales. Words are cheap actions are not. Prove to me you are those legends and perhaps I may change, other wise you’re a clueless new comer like most fools that come to Imladris.” Erestor states and Glorfindel grins sheepishly as they leave. The smiths happened to be free at least the one Erestor goes to he mostly deals in elf stones but he does make trinkets and looks at the drawing Erestor does of Glorfindel’s costume and agrees to help make a sun styled trinket smiling as he sees the one Erestor’s chosen.
“I’ve an idea for it.” He says and retreats to his workshop and Erestor nods at Glorfindel.
“Have fun with your work. I’ve gotten my costume handled at this point. I’ll talk with Lindir about some minor details for my part and I’ll be done.” He states. Glorfindel thanks him and they part ways. It’s several days till the festival and Erestor is prepared and already done with the fan fare everyone whispering who’s who and no one knows. Except they’re all fully aware Glorfindel is to play the Sun King. Erestor goes and picks up his costume and smiles at it. The robes are trimmed in silver with glittering beads sown on like little stars and the dark almost black blue shimmers faintly showing like moonlight over water. 
He thanks her and takes the pale silver under robes and shirt and the leggings and retreats to his rooms with his costume and tries it all on. He looks like a night related queen or lord of some sort. His hair he pulls back braiding in little beads and smiles a bit snickering as now he sees why Elrond had wanted him to play in this years festival. He had flair for things when called for. Lindir peeks in and whistles and asks him a last few questions as he get’s last minute details in order. 
Erestor goes and waits for the festival to start and has small finger tip claw like silver embellishments he’ll use to pluck the harp he’ll be playing. Glorfindel is hiding elsewhere and Soon the hall fills up and Erestor waits until the silver lights are raised and he steps out and walks to the harp set on the stage and silence falls over the hall. He sits and plucks out a tune as he starts to sing.
“Fear not this night, you will not go astray...” Erestor sings and the bards scattered in shadows play along and he sings softly on voice steadily raising as the song grows and he looks up as he fades and the lights fade as stronger light fills the room and Glorfindel steps onto stage and Erestor can admit a king he looks like his own circlet  the golden one lookes like curling vines and flowers bloom across it to cup a sun that glows with an elf stone. The blue and gold robes are magnificent and regal on the warrior.
“I hear a voice so sweet on too few occasions...” He says it’s his opening line and Erestor folds his hands in his lap and watches him calmly.
“I have sang many times, ray of Arnor. You are astray from her to dally here in twilight.” Erestor responds.
“Too long I ignored the songs I have heard and asked leave to seek out the source for I’ve never heard a fairer voice.” Glorfindel answers and Erestor then stands and walks closer.
“Fair words from a fair face.” Erestor answers back and walks around the warrior appraising and smiling secretive as the elda blushed and looks down before looking up.
“I love you, but I don’t even think I know who you really are.” The golden one says and the silver one laughs and twirls his robes flaring as he offers a hand.
“Then learn, and decide then if it my voice or me you are infatuated with.” He says and Glorfindel reaches out and takes his hand and they turn to the audience and bow. 
The festivities now underway they mingle and talk and Elrond congratulates them both on a masterful performance. The party went on and Erestor found a corner to hide in glowering at those who came to gossip until they left he’s holding a half full glass and sighs as he takes another sip of the dark red wine.
“Can I hide with you here? I have more fans then before and I want to strangle Elrond for it.” Glorfindel asks and Erestor nods to the wall he’s leaning on.
“Think we can hide his body without anyone finding out?” Erestor asks and Glorfindel chuckles.
“Probably not.” He says and Erestor groans and let’s his head thunk back against the wall.
“You... Forgive me if I offend I really don’t mean to... You remind me a lot of Ecthelion.” Glorfindel says and Erestor glanced to the blond and looks down.
“He was my brother. I worked within the castle as a scribe and recorded the histories. So I was largely in the shadows. No one noticed me much, I liked it that way. So I’m not offended. I’m glad to hear I look like him.” Erestor says and Glorfindel goes pale.
“So you...” He fades off and Erestor looks over and smiles softly and places a hand on the elda’s shoulder.
“I know how often you screwed up while training, yes, and don’t, painful memories serve no one when they fester. I blame no one but those who allowed the city to be destroyed. You fought to defend it and died. Even if he didn’t come back, I’m glad his dear friend did. It is nice to get to know you as he often talked about you.” Erestor says and the elda nods and shivers slightly. Erestor frowns and leads them to the gardens and away from everyone to a small terrace that looked over the valley and was well lit by the moon.
“You’ve nothing to fear here Lord Glorfindel. Elrond holds this valley’s safety above even his own heath at times. He would let us know should anything foul come this way.” Erestor says and the golden elf nods taking a deep breath. He stops shivering and Erestor stares out over the silver falls and he sits on the banister and begins to sing softly again. Glorfindel listens with a soft smile as the night slowly fades to dawn.
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izzy-b-hands · 4 years ago
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Cut Scene
Jim/Freddie/ Trans Reader, and something that is unbearably, painfully sweet. You come home from touring with Freddie in the US, with a new haircut done by the hairdresser in your hometown. Unfortunately, she...well. She cut it! Just not well. 
But Jim won’t let you languish like that, and Freddie of course will supervise (aka the three of you are clingy with each other after a tour ends lol.) 
My love to all who read/like/reblog!
“But she does cut men’s hair, right? You said she does,” Jim tutted and walked around you, hands gently mussing and fussing with your hair.  
“She does,” you laughed. The ‘she’ in question is your usual hairdresser in the States, who you had visited on the latest US tour, just before coming home with Freddie. “Why, is it that bad?”
He winced. “Can I say what I think happened? I think you might already know, but since you haven’t said yourself...”
“Go for it.”
“Because you’re...” he hesitated, and looked over to Freddie with a look that screamed ‘help.’
“You know how she kept asking ‘are you sure you want to look so masculine’, and you kept laughing it off?” Freddie asked bluntly. “That’s what he means. She’s known for years now that you’re transgender, but she’s still trying to cut your hair like she would have before you came out. I wanted to say something the whole appointment, but I know you would have fussed had I spoken up.”
“I just like to keep the peace when I’m at home,” you protested, but they both shook their heads.
“At the cost of your own happiness and comfort,” Jim sighed. “But yes, he’s right. That’s what I mean, exactly. She did cut it short, yes, but she did it in a very feminine way. Look at your sideburns, for pity’s sake! What is this; they’re unkempt, and odd, and I know what you wanted them to look like because you told me when you guys called the night before, so I know you described it to her correctly.”
“Is it fixable?” you asked, fearing you already knew the answer.
“Most things are fixable,” Jim said. “This is...technically fixable? If I try and fix it completely, it’ll end up shorter than you want it. But I can fix some of it now; the sideburns and some of the styling, and the rest we can do once it grows back out some.”
“I really should have waited until we got home and just had you do it,” you muttered. “I was trying to be nice. Felt bad not giving her my business when I know my mum told her I was in town.”
“Your mum,” Jim started, but he stopped as Freddie giggled. “What? I’m not going to say anything that mean.”
“Oh, that means he’s going to be really catty,” Freddie whispered, though you were well aware of that.
“It isn’t catty or bitchy if it’s honest,” Jim said. “I was only going to say that your mother, who is a...”
He stumbled for a moment, and Freddie lost it laughing.
“Shush! She’s...something special, and-”
That’s what sent you over the edge, and you were glad the haircut hadn’t started yet as you folded in on yourself giggling.
Jim laughed too, blushing, as he tried desperately to get through his sentence. “She’s something special, in her own unique way, and maybe, perhaps, she should learn to keep her mouth shut. At certain times, like when you’re in town, because I’m sure you could let people know that on your own without any help.”
“Artfully done,” Freddie said as he got himself back under control.
“Hush,” Jim prompted him over for a kiss, and Freddie winced as he looked at you in the mirror.
“Don’t! It isn’t that bad,” you joked, but truthfully, the conversation confirmed your worst fears about the cut. No wonder people were staring in the airport (though that may also have been because you were with Freddie, but it certainly felt like it was all your hair.)
“It won’t be,” Freddie reassured you, and ran his fingers through your hair. “Oh, look at that. You really are going silver already. Looks nice on you though, and that I do mean sincerely.”
“I thought so too,” you said, and pinched one of the silver hairs in your sideburns. “My poor hairdresser back home though-”
“She wouldn’t shut the fuck up about it,” Freddie interjected. “Y/N dyes his hair anyway simply for fun, and she still kept harping on about it.”
“That’s why I skipped the dye this time,” you admitted. “I got so sick of hearing her go on, that I decided to just leave it as is.”
“We could do that here for you anyway,” Jim said, and leaned over to pull at your sideburns, tsking at the sight of them. “They aren’t even! Let me go get everything we’ll need, and let’s fix this, shall we?”
To call the experience erotic or anything like that wouldn’t be correct; it is his day job after all. But he’s clearly missed you both, and it shows as he worked on you.
His hands were extra gentle as they moved, and when hair did fall onto your face, he removed it carefully, rather than just brushing it quickly away like any other stylist might.
“If I wash your hair for you, you’ll fall asleep on me,” he teased. “Is the jet lag that bad this time?”
He turned to check with Freddie, and you smiled as you looked with him.
Freddie was still upright in his chair at the island (not the most comfortable one, but there were only the options of doing the cut in the kitchen, or in one of the bathrooms) but his eyes were closed, and his head was propped on his hands.
“That’s a yes then,” Jim chuckled as he retrieved a thick dish cloth from a drawer and placed it just so on the counter, so it might catch Freddie should his face slip from his hands.
“I don’t think either of us slept during it,” you admitted. “That’s partially my fault though, otherwise he might have napped.”
“And what did you do?”
“There was turbulence,” you continued. “In my defense. And you know I get nervous with turbulence-”
“Because you worry the plane will fall out of the sky,” Jim said matter-of-factly. He’d flown enough with both of you to know how that experience usually went.
“Right,” you confirmed. “And he offered his hand to hold-”
“And luckily, despite the lack of blood flow over several hours, they didn’t have to amputate,” Jim joked.
“Yeah,” you mumbled sheepishly. “I told him to say if it was hurting or if I was squeezing too hard! He never said!”
“Of course he didn’t,” Jim said as his hands busied themselves again with measuring out your sideburns. “I wouldn’t have said either, you know that. We’d rather have our hands go numb than see you panic during a flight. Same way you end up being a pillow for both of us if you take the middle seat, which you nearly always do.”
“But that’s cute,” you said. “That’s just me getting to watch you two sleep, and then me getting to listen to you both complain of a neck ache as soon as we land.”
He laughed and shook his head. “Is this your way of telling me you needed me with on this tour or something?”
“I know your job doesn’t let you up and leave like that,” you said. “But we did miss you. Next one, you should come out. Even if it’s only for a day or two, however long they can let you be gone.”
“And you promise not to whine and complain when I do have to go back?”
“You know I can’t promise that,” you replied with a playful scoff. “Nor can Freddie.”
Freddie, for his part, was completely out, but you took his occasional snore as a vote in your favor.
“We should put him to bed after this,” Jim whispered. “And yourself.”
“I’m fine,” you protested, and tried to fight off a yawn.
But he could tell, and he smirked as he kept on with your hair. “Really? Because I figured you’d love the idea of bed. We finish your hair, get a bath run for each of you-”
“Oh stop,” you teased, but inside you were melting at his words.
“And then once you’re both clean and comfortable we head into bed and you two can sleep the next day or so away until you feel back to normal,” he continued. “Speaking of...doesn’t that look better?”
You peered in the mirror and smiled. “It does. Thank you for fixing it for me.”
“Of course,” he kissed your cheek and ran a hand through your hair. “I certainly wasn’t going to leave you looking like you were!
He suddenly darted back, and helped catch Freddie’s head just as it slipped off his hands. That was enough to wake Freddie, who didn’t so much as miss a beat.
“Oh! Look at you, that’s so much better!” he smiled, and yawned. “Now-”
“Bed,” Jim interrupted.
“We’re fi-”
“Don’t start,” Jim laughed. “Y/N already tried that, and it didn’t work. You need baths and sleep.”
“We aren’t children,” Freddie muttered, but he made no move to get off his chair until Jim helped him.
“Come over here,” Jim waved you over as you shook the cloth cover around your shoulders out over the sink. “I’ve got two arms; I can get both of you upstairs.”
“You certainly can,” Freddie teased.
“Don’t you two start,” Jim scolded playfully. “You aren’t going to start something only to fall asleep on me before it goes anywhere.”
“What if we promise not to fall asleep?” you asked through a yawn as you joined up with them.
“Yes, because you sound like you could definitely keep that promise,” Jim sighed with a smile. “How about tomorrow instead?”
“You can’t plan passion,” Freddie protested, but his eyes were already shut as Jim helped you both upstairs to the bedroom.
“I don’t think anyone can tell you what you can or can’t do,” Jim chuckled.
“You could,” Freddie murmured. “And Y/N, sometimes.”
“Key word is ‘sometimes’,” you added with a smirk as you let Jim gently push you away and onto the bed.
“I did think we could make use of the extra bathroom down the hall,” Jim sighed, and you could feel his eyes on the two of you as you fought to stay awake. “But if we do that, then one of you is bound to fall asleep in the bath and drown.”
“Potentially,” you muttered.
“One after the other it is then,” Jim said. “I’ll wake you each when the bath is run.”
“We’re awake,” you heard Freddie protest.
“Sure you are,” Jim giggled. “Like I said, I’ll wake you.”
Any protest you had died on your lips as Freddie swung himself over to snuggle close. For now, you could accept that you needed to sleep.
But tomorrow, you had plans to help Freddie show Jim just how grateful and happy you were to have him.
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kektrain · 4 years ago
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The broken vail: Those who walk after and the future
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steven-falls · 5 years ago
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Steven Universe Future Critically reviewed: Little Graduation (An underwhelming end to the LarSadie arc)
Basic synopsis: Sadie reveals she has a new partner, Shep. Steven takes the news badly, believing that there are unresolved feelings between Sadie and Lars. But what about Steven’s own feelings?
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‘Oh no! Our ship!’
Wow, this has got to be Steven Universe’s craziest use of foreshadowing yet!
So, the LarSadie ship that sailed through rocky waters for the past 5 seasons has finally sank. Am I as devastated as Steven that the two of them couldn’t work things out?
 Nope.
 To be honest I’m pretty glad. Lars was always kind of dickish to Sadie, and Sadie’s best character moments tended to be in episodes where Lars wasn’t involved. So nothing but a net positive for Sadie that she’s moved on.
The conclusion that the audience are supposed to come to is that yes, Lars and Sadie not being together is for the best. The two of them have chosen different life paths, and seem content with the paths they’re taking. But we’re also supposed to sympathise with Steven to some degree; it’s a bittersweet ending that the two of them couldn’t work things out.
 But I honestly just don’t care. 
The main reason being that I had no investment in Lars and Sadie’s relationship whatsoever. 
I think what really stunted the Lars and Sadie arc was how it was shackled to the Steven only perspective. They actually lampshade this in the episode. When Lars and Sadie explain how they have already discussed their relationship with one another, Steven exclaims ‘but I didn’t see any of that!’. This being a nod to how the audience only sees what Steven sees. It’s meant to be this cute little in-joke, like the crewniverse is saying: ‘Ha ha we know the Steven only perspective is something our audience has issues with but we’re still not doing anything about it!’ I didn’t find this amusing, I just found it irritating that they would point out limitations in their storytelling methods without actually doing anything to try and fix them.
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‘We can take what we’ve learned to other planets!’
Alright settle down you store brand Steven wannabe.
In theory, I think the way the Lars and Sadie arc was concluded is quite nice. They live separate lives now, but are still happy for one another. What I think is lame is that instead of seeing how their relationship developed first hand, we instead have to settle for being told all this happened off screen. This is a textbook case of telling instead of showing. 
Like, the only reason we, the audience, weren’t allowed to see Lars and Sadie’s private conversations was because Steven wasn’t there to witness them. And it's always going to be more satisfying for an audience member to see how a situation or relationship develops first hand rather than just being told ‘oh yeah, by the way, while you were gone this happened.’
I already stated that I don’t particularly care about Lars and Sadie. But if I have to sit through an episode about their relationship anyway, maybe actually getting to see an intimate conversation between the two of them would have given me a reason to care.
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Ew, Buck’s eyes are gross
Steven’s mere presence limits how much you can develop Lars and Sadie’s dynamic. Because Steven always has to be there, anytime the crewniverse want to do a Lars and Sadie episode they first have to invent a reason for Steven to get involved. Which means he takes up screen time away from all the other characters, who are already less developed then he is because they aren’t around as frequently.
And what makes this worse is that Steven’s connection to Lars and Sadie is a little flimsy. He’s just some kid who was customer at the shop they used to work at. It’s kind of weird to use Steven as the viewpoint for their relationship when he tends to only see one specific facet of their lives.
Which leads me into my second issue with Lars and Sadie. That they as characters, and by extension their relationship, was too far removed from the main plot of the show. 
You’d think Lars having to escape the tyranny of Homeworld would have made him a more integral presence in the plot, but it really didn’t. We barely got to see any of his escape from the gempire. I’m still not sure how he even managed to get off homeworld in the first place. 
This problem isn’t unique to Lars and Sadie, other relationships have also suffered because of the Steven only perspective, a prime example being Lapis and Peridot. I actually think one of the best developed relationships in the show was Rose and Greg’s. We got to see that relationship unfold first hand from Greg’s perspective, rather than it being filtered through Steven acting as a third party observer. I’m not even saying they’d have to write Steven out of entire episodes, just don’t have him be the focal character in every single scene. But considering this is the final season of steven universe, It’s obviously too late for any of that.
At the end of the day, I’d say my biggest criticism of this episode is the rather lackluster send off to the Larsadie arc. And considering this episode’s purpose was to conclude the Larsadie arc,  that’s a pretty bad thing for the episode to fumble.
I realise that was a pretty lengthy tangent about Lars and Sadie, but considering this episode is supposed to act as a conclusion to that arc I feel justified in harping on about them. But what were my thoughts on the graduation itself?
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Padparadscha and Fluorite’s teachers must of had the patience of a saint. 
One thing that jumped out of me was that while a lot of characters attended this graduation, most of them were awkwardly silent throughout the whole thing. With Sourcream, Buck and the off colours not getting any lines. I know the reason is because they don’t want to pay all these voice actors to have only one or two lines in an episode. Why bother giving Sourcream and Buck lines when you can convey everything you need to through just Jenny? But it gets pretty noticeable when all these characters are facing certain death and have nothing to say about it. Especially for the off colours, who don’t even get to talk at their own graduation. This may seem like a nitpick, but noticing stuff like this takes me out of the episode as I become painfully aware of where the production is cutting costs. 
Also apparently the cool kids are still all teenagers? They seemed to be pushing they’re late teens back when Steven was 14, they’re really stretching it now. And it doesn’t help that none of them have visibly aged.
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The  jacket for phone idea is cute and all, but it’s completely impractical. What if I need to answer a phone call or reply to a text? Do I have to unzip the jacket everytime? Wouldn’t the jacket just fall off the phone? Either that or it would partially cover the screen, which would be annoying. This business isn’t getting my investment that’s for sure.
And of course, I got to talk about Shep. Finally, the show has some actual non binary representation, you don’t have to settle for a boy and girl literally fusing together anymore. 
Shep’s gender is so ambiguous that they’re able to get past all censoring. I don’t think it would even register with any conservitive parents watching that this is supposed to be a queer character. They can’t complain about a same sex couple in a cartoon if it’s left completely unclear what Shep’s sex is. 
Although, I do have a fear that foreign dubs of the show might portray Shep as a male.
Shep is also ultimately the one who saves the day. They make an accurate diagnosis of Steven’s issues, despite barely knowing Steven. Which is pretty hilarious to me as being the unlicensed therapist is usually Steven’s role. 
I’m sure this was an intentional subversion on the crewniverse’s part. And it does give Shep an actual character moment, without it they’d just be a love triangle plot device for the episode. But I don’t like this trope of some stranger swooping in and having an answer to your life's problems; I think the advice Shep gave would have been better suited coming from someone who actually knows Steven.
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‘It seems like your sad about your friends drifting away, so you trapped us all in this dome to keep us from leaving’
Like yes, that’s exactly what’s happening, but I don’t understand how you know enough about Steven’s life to come to that conclusion.
I also can’t get over how everyone casually dismisses that Steven nearly killed them with magic he couldn’t control. None of them seem to see this as an issue that could get worse in the future.
And of course it does, as Steven’s angst magic ends up taking a deadly turn again in the very next episode ‘Prickly Pair’. Which is what I’ll be discussing in the next review. Hopefully my opinion of that episode won’t be as… prickly.
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Shattered Reflections {23}
[Helsa RP- Fanfic]
Fandom: Frozen
Genre: Post-Frozen/ Canon Divergence
- Hurt/Comfort, Drama, Romance
Pairing(s): Hans/Elsa, Kristoff/Anna
Previous Chapter: 22. Waltz of the Snowflakes
23. Cordially Invited
Elsa overslept after her long evening, but she'd still got up well before Anna started stirring out of her slumber. Oversleeping to Elsa only meant she'd gotten up at a more sensible hour, closer to when normal people (and not extra early birds, such as herself) tended to awaken. Her mind not shutting off right away once she'd gone to bed really took a toll and the price was more sleep, how tragic. Perhaps Anna would have been able to do her hair after all, if she only allowed herself to sleep in, for real. She smiled a little, gazing in the vanity mirror as she brushed and put her hair back in her usual braid, remembering the compliments she'd gotten. 
 Soon she was off on her normal routine even if she had started a tad bit later than usual. Her workload seemed quite manageable that day. As lunchtime started rolling around, Elsa started  thinking of possibly having a tea time with Hans that afternoon. Sure, it was imprudent, especially considering the late night they just had, but she was eager to spend more time together if they were both able. She was eager, but perhaps not dauntless enough to go ask him directly, maybe being a bit nervous to face him now that he was more sobered up. So she decided to send him an invitation, yes it might have been overly formal, but sending him a written request put her more at ease (particularly for the off chance he would decline instead). He was to receive the invitation along with his lunch, and Elsa would have to wait until tea time to see if he would join her, which was a bit suspenseful, she of course would be a disappointed if he didn't show (but probably not as much if he'd told her), but she'd given him the option of not coming if he was unable as well.
  Hans was also an early bird, now too beset by the idea of waking up at a reasonable hour. He still slept in a little later than Elsa, but for his part, he had little to do but sleep, much to his eternal vexation. The invitation was a surprise, but a pleasant one. He thought it was terribly cute that she wrote it all out formally. She could've easily sent someone to just ask, it wasn't as if they were a mile apart, but she had opted for a formal letter. He was half-tempted to be cheeky and write a formal acceptance back, but suspected she would miss the humor in it. Instead, he opted to wear some of his nicer clothes -still quite ordinary, as he did still have his prison clothes, but some of the ones with the bloodstains best washed out- and appear there when tea time arrived, on the dot. He had little better to do than be punctual, and as a Navy man, punctuality was important. more so than uniforms, at any rate. 
 "Good afternoon, your Majesty. Or is tea time when we switch to 'good evening'?" He asked with a smile, just being sweet and light.
 At the sound of Hans' voice resonating through the room, Elsa turned to look at him. She had previously been playing around with the table spread trying to make it look just right, she could be a bit obsessive when it comes to being orderly. Seeing him more dressed up than she'd become accustomed to, caught her by surprise, she hadn't seen like that since he'd first arrived, not that she was complaining. 
 "Oh, good afternoon," she greeted with a smile. "Glad you were able to join me."
"Of course. I made room in my busy schedule of 'nothing much to do' just for this." He assured, with a playful smile. "Tea in the music room perhaps, then? So I can play for you?" The tone of a servant, though given with what was perhaps a knowing smile. He suspected she might've liked him. He didn't think he was deserving of it, part of him wanted to warn her away from it, but he couldn't deny that it felt nice to be liked. He hadn't decided yet how to feel about the whole thing.
"Sounds like you really had to clear your schedule just to make it," she lightly laughed. "Yes, of course, but please do have some tea first,"she offered, signaling with her arm that he should take a seat at the already arranged table, she didn't want him to just play for her the whole time.
  "As you please." He hummed, settling where she gestured and moving to pour the tea. He was a gentleman, and a Navy man. In a way, he was used to service. It was a small gesture, but not one that one might expect of a prince, let alone the one once accused of Treason. The silence was unusual, but amicable. Hans didn't want to be the one to break it, when tea warranted a bit of thoughtful introspection and quiet contemplation.
  Elsa was used to silence while she sipped tea in solitude, yet with Hans there it somehow felt unbearable, even if it was rather nice just to have him there, she had to break the ice. Starting conversations wasn't her forte, but she gave it a try just to get him talking. She needed to think about a topic, of course she could ask about the weather but that was so drab, she had to come up with something better. Think Elsa, think. She looked around the room. That's it! Instruments. She could ask what instruments the rest of the Princes of the Isles had taken up, but then she didn't like being the one to bring up his brothers or the Isles, she still only felt comfortable asking when he was the one opening up to talk about that subject. 
 "So, when did you start learning to play the harp?" she asked instead, she didn't know the answer despite them talking about his ability to play the harp countless times.
Hans had to think about it a bit. "Oh, when I was young I suppose, maybe around my early teenage years? Those were difficult, but Gregory plays piano, and makes music his life, so he taught me." Hans seemed to detect Elsa's discomfort with the silence, and opted to go on. "He married a singer, Katharina. Sweet girl, never heard her say an unkind thing, and that is an accomplishment, living with the family. Gregory is a good man, all kindness and passion for music. His response to terminal illness was to opt out of any crown business and focus solely on music. The castle would be a miserable place without it." He didn't mind talking about the good parts of his family. If asked in good faith, he wouldn't mind talking about the bad parts, either.
  "That's sweet, it's awful that your brother is ill, but it sounds like he's making the best of it by surrounding himself by things he loves." Elsa didn't know how else to respond. It was bittersweet. It was nice to hear that one of Hans' brother's was the one that taught him.
  "He is, and filling the castle with music. A number of us learned some instrument or other, so I chose the Harp. In a family full of men, even Eduard was shy of choosing a feminine instrument. He's changed a lot since then, of course, but I wanted something unique, so I picked the Harp. It's a background instrument, something no-one but the player truly pays attention to on most occasions. Exactly the sort of role I wanted in the house: unnoticed." He explained simply. "My brothers harassed me for all sorts of things already, adding one more was meaningless, and by that point I was learning to withstand them. Not well enough, but I made it through my teenage years." With the help of some other brothers cutting him down, but she didn't need to know the details of that venture. The harp was much more harmless, better to talk about that.
  Unique but unnoticed, sounded a bit like a contradiction. Elsa let out a groan at the mention of him being tormented by some of his brothers, it was always upsetting to hear that his own family was purposely callous towards him. 
 "Hopefully, you don't mind being noticed playing for me." He would not be obscured in the background playing for her, instead he would be the focal point of her attention.
  "I don't mind being noticed here. Unless it's by Anna, I'd sooner she forget I was here at all. But for you, I don't mind being noticed." He assured her gently. He cringed a little. "When I say it all out loud it sounds much worse, doesn't it?" He admitted with a weak chuckle. "Many of my brothers are sweet or largely inoffensive. Most of my 'tormenting' was sibling teasing. A few bad apples made my life a bit rough, though statistically the number is higher than I'd like." He assured, apparently trying to comfort her with the idea that not all of his childhood was awful. It was, he just didn't realize he deserved his traumas.
  Elsa shrugged a little at his question, she truly didn't mind either. 
 "Having only one sibling it's hard for me to truly understand, but I don't know what I would have done if I didn't have a sister as loving as Anna."
  "I would suggest that being alone would've been much more unbearable without knowing there was someone on the outside missing you. It's a sharper pain, but I've found that while sharp cuts hurt more in the moment, they do less damage overall than significant blunt pains." It was probably for the best if he didn't expound on his knowledge of that.
  "I suppose," she answered with a nod as she took another sip of her tea. Their conversation seemed to have gone gloomy without delay, but that wasn't new, it seemed to be a common occurrence with the two of them. Thinking of a way to try to brighten it up proved rather difficult for Elsa since starting and keeping a conversation going was already a challenge for her.
  Hans, by contrast, seemed perfectly comfortable with both the quiet and with the gloomy turn. He lived mired in it, so being able to talk about the gloomy things may have actually been a bit of a good sign. They were comfortable, and could unload on each-other all the dark things that bothered them-- if they trusted each-other with that.
  "Hmm, sorry. I didn't mean to bring up anything dark. It's a bit how my mind works, I think. I don't think it's always a bad thing, to reflect on bad things. We just have to watch that it doesn't overtake us. The seas are allowed to be a little edgy, so long as we don't sail directly into a maelstrom." He would bring it back to sailing, somehow.
  "Oh, don't be. My mind tends to go down that path as well. I don't mind talking about that stuff, I'm just so used to changing the subject before it gets too dark because I don't feel I can really talk to Anna about some of these things."
  "Well, thankfully for me, I'm not Anna or I'd have to be even angrier with myself. You're welcome to talk about the dark things with me. Lord knows I do it enough, but I suppose I only talk about the darker things here because you actually seem to take an interest." And express sympathy, rather than telling him to man up or get over it. She didn't need to know that part.
 "Of course, I like to listen. I think it helps me understand you a bit better," she assured.
  "For better or worse, hm?" He suggested with amusement. He meant it as a joke about how it might not be a good thing to understand him better. He didn't think about the line as also being used in wedding vows, and it was probably best not to read into it. "Well, is there anything you'd like to know about me? While we're being chatty and talking about dark things, may as well."
  Anything? Everything, if she was being honest. She had countless questions, but that moment being put on the spot she couldn't think of any. What could she ask him that she was most curious to know. 
 "Hmm." She paused and pondered. She could really ask him anything, yet her mind was blank. Then she thought of something she was still in the dark about. She seemed to have gotten a better understanding of the relationship he had with his brothers when he described them to her but she still didn't know much about his parents. What she gathered from previous conversations was that Hans thought of his father as a good man, but he was unfortunately ill and his mother seemed to be a different story; he seemed to hold some rancor towards her. She wondered if it was a can of worms she was really wanting to open. 
 "Um, I think I would like to know more about your relationship with your parents, so I can get a better idea of what they're like --like I did when you talked about your brothers-- Of course you don't have to answer if it's too personal." She asked somewhat nervously, thinking she might have overstepped the boundary. She really could have asked him absolutely anything and yet that's what came to mind.
  Hans shrugged a little, as much a gesture of opening his hand as it was with his shoulders, he was willing to give up that knowledge if she was willing to ask for it. 
 "My mother was an actress, and in many ways, still is. I'm sure I'll never know what father saw in her aside from her beauty. She is quite beautiful, and a talented actress, but unfortunately she is also a horribly neglectful mother, and prone to the 'man up and make something of yourself' school of parenting. 'Westergaards are lions, not mice' she would say, and we would all casually overlook the fact that she's only one by marriage, so what would she bloody well know about it?" He shook his head a little.
  "She's the type to tell the people that she loves all her children, but she never learned sign language for Bernhard, and that, I think, tells you all you need to know about her. Though I'll be happy to talk about what a terrible mother she is all day if you're interested." He certainly pulled no punches, there. "My father, on the other hand, has always been loving and supportive. Gerard took after him splendidly; all integrity, loyalty, and honor. I only pray that Gerard didn't also inherit his poor health."
  Ouch, that was harsh, both how Hans saw her and how she treated her children, though it wasn't far off from what she'd deduced. She didn't know how to respond, but she asked in the first place. Elsa almost wanted to apologize, but refrained herself for doing so, because he would only tell her it was not her fault, which was true. 
 "You're welcome to talk about it whenever you want, I'll listen," she offered, with sincerity. Though now might not have been the best time to spend all day talking about it, souring their tea time with bitter memories.
  "I don't think of when I want to do things, generally. Remember, I'm a mirror. Who do you think I got that from?" His mother, of course. The actor took after the actress. "I do what people approve of. I want to be approved, that's how I am. When left to my own devices, I try to avoid notice and be as unremarked as possible, usually. At least in the Navy I had a role, it was whatever my rank said I was. To be approved of I simply had to do my job. That was easy. Fools tell stories and jokes as long as they have an audience, guards protect and train and are ready to defend a kingdom, prisoners need only to sit in a cell and be repentant. Jobs are easy. Being a prince is damned near impossible. At least where I'm from." It was a novel way to think of it, and one he had never really put to words before. As long as he had a job, a role, an identity, he could be. When he didn't, he tried not to be at all, because then all he was left with was 'mirror'.
  He kept saying that he was nothing but a mirror, yet Elsa didn't fully believe it herself, she firmly felt there was something more. Yes, he was excessively adaptable trying to seek validation, but she didn't think he was reflecting 'what people wanted' without reflecting a bit of himself as well. Though perhaps the problem was he failed to realize he even had a reflection. He lost himself playing the parts, yet that didn't mean people didn't recognize the actor in the role. In actuality, she saw him more as a man trapped in a mirror instead of being the mirror himself, and because of that he was unable to see his own reflection. Elsa wanted to state something similar to her speculation out loud, but no words came out, instead she remained silent and sipped her tea.
  "Hm, the more time I spent telling you I don't talk about my issues, the more time I spend talking about my issues." Hans admitted, after a long and awkward silence. He couldn't help but smile sheepishly over his tea, while he shut up and drank a bit. "What can I say? You bring the truth out of me, whether I want it or not. And maybe deep down I do." What an odd thought, yet it seemed true. He wanted to talk to her about things, and hear what she did -or didn't- have to say about it.
  "I'm glad to hear that," Elsa smiled with an audible hum, she was indeed flattered that he was willing to open up to her, and certainly more than happy to listen. Her beaming blue eyes jumped from her tea cup to Hans and back again.
  He wondered a moment if she had wanted to say something. He certainly didn't mind as the quiet settled in again, this time more peacefully. 
 "I wonder how it is, that my kingdom has all the sun, but yours is somehow brighter?" He mused. It was just a general 'feeling' of brighter and lightness. Maybe it was just her. "Our land is warmer, but yours has the warmth, as it were." And it was true, Arendelle was -at least socially- warmer.
"Hm, you really think so?" She questioned with curiosity. She hadn't known much about how things were outside her own home so it was hard for her to compare. "How else would you say the Isles really differ from Arendelle? As a place I mean."
  "Our humor is darker, we're a little less... I'm not sure. I want to say 'we're less kind', though I'm not sure how to justify that accusation. More, we have different philosophies about the world, I think, and Arendelle's is lighter and sweeter. Of course, the majority of my exposure to the Isles is through the castle. It's possible the town is nothing like that and my expectations are just colored." He shrugged. "My perspective is certainly much darker than most. But then, the Isles still has corporal punishment, so I think it's probably justified to say that we're much darker." It was just a fact, as he knew it. It was less frequently used than it had once been, but it was still there.
  Elsa nodded along. Perspective was a fickle thing, experience really could mold the outlook someone held about something, be it a place or a person. Elsa would have never imagined that her perspective of Hans would ever alter, yet here they were, an unlikely pair having tea together. Naturally it would have never happened without Elsa allowing herself the opportunity to try get to know him better. 
"You know I used to wonder...and worry, whether or not I could maintain Arendelle’s prosperity as Queen. That's still certainly on my mind, but it was more prevalent before my ascension, back when I was planning to keep the gates closed." She remembered, with the talk about their homelands. "I'm truly grateful that the gates are now open, I'm sure the people are too and find it more pleasant, than having an ominous Queen ruling them from behind a closed gate. I really am blessed to be able to see, feel and enjoy Arendelle's happiness myself."
  Hans nodded thoughtfully. "In spite of everything that happened, I'm... glad that whatever awful things happened, I ended up here, at this moment. I certainly wouldn't want to repeat past events if it could be helped, but, being here now is nice. It's certainly better than I expected would happen after those events." Not quite what he had hoped or planned for before them, but hopes and plans of 'then' were meaningless now. Now he was just happy that Elsa seemed to have forgiven him. "Do you think Anna will forgive and forget? Or, at least, forgive? I wouldn't be surprised nor offended if she didn't, but I'm curious about your perspective."
  Elsa pursed her lips like she usually did when she pondered. 
 "I really don't know to be honest. I want to say yes, maybe someday, because Anna is the kindest, most loving and forgiving person I know...but she's still hurt and I don't know when or if that will ever heal," she offered her insight. "I don't know if forgiveness will come for sure, but there's hope for a compromise."
  Hans nodded thoughtfully. "It's a difficult proposition, I know." He thought about the cold dismissal in Anna's voice when she said 'I have no use for you'. It was something he should have expected, yet it still knotted his stomach to think about. He gritted his teeth a little and refocused on his tea, taking a sip and trying to re-center himself on something nicer. 
 "So, ah, anything else you'd like to know about me or my family? Working on a ship, foreign lands, anything?" Questions. Anything to prompt him to think of something else. He didn't look at her when he said it, he was staring off at nothing, the corner moulding on the far wall by the rug. He wasn't really looking at it, but trying to wrestle himself away from his thoughts.
 Elsa noticed the subtle change in his demeanor. It was clear he wanted to change the subject, but she forgot to tell him something and perhaps it would have been better if she had started off with it. 
 "You know last night Anna told me it was perhaps good that you were here and that we could learn something important," she mentioned. 
 Elsa remembered she never did get the chance to tell Hans that Anna had a habit of hitting a person's weak spots without knowing it, like Kristoff had suggested after their confrontation, so it was likely he was taking the idea of being seen as 'useless' by Anna to heart ever since then. She didn't know if her words would help any, but she was at least putting them out there.
  Hans tilted his head a little, curiously. "Oh?" He sounded very puzzled by that thought. "And what on earth could be learned from this, for you?" Yet even as he asked, some part of him started filling in answers. "She thinks it might be good that I'm... well, I did help with the invasion." He admitted with a shrug. Indeed, he had helped to turn the tide of it, he just didn't realize how vital he had been, yet. To say nothing of re-training the guard staff.
  "Hm? Yes, she recognized that you helped stop the raid."Elsa nodded, and added." I don't know what we would have done without you.
Hans blinked, perplexed by the thought. He knew it, yes, but it was different to hear it out loud. It seemed his mind was bound and determined that he should hate himself, so evidence that he shouldn't was slow to process. 
 "I'm still perplexed that Weselton tried at all, that's a hangable offense in the Isles, starting wars against other nations. Especially with me here. My brother would never have authorized an attempted coup, let alone knowing I was here." He got lost on that thought a moment, almost forgetting to acknowledge his own help. "I suppose... The coup would have been successful. Or at least, more successful than would matter otherwise. I can't imagine..." But he could, all too well. He knew what sword-hacked necks looked like, and he trembled to think about the blood in the grand hall.
  "Forgive me, my imagination just ran away with me in an awful way. I think I know what will feature in my nightmares now." He had them all too frequently, but nightmares were normal to him.
  "Let's think of something more pleasant than that battle. Olaf seems to have figured out who I am, and he's taking it well. Your little snow-prince has quite charmed me." Hans admitted, putting on a pleasant tone as he tried to find something as far removed from blood and gore as he could drag it.
  "Oh, he has? It makes sense he would have figured it out by now, I didn't know how to tell him myself. The only reason I didn't want him to know in the first place was to keep him from telling Anna, because as you know, he is a rather chatty snowman," She assured. "It was rather pointless considering what happened next, yet it did make you 'Hans the Fool' which both of you seem to enjoy, so some good came out of it, I suppose," Elsa smiled, remembering how entranced they'd been when Hans told his story. 
 "Olaf is an embodiment of excitement, so I'm not surprised he's taken a liking to you especially considering you enjoy indulging him, which the rest of us aren't always able to do. I'm glad you've taken a liking to him as well. I'm sure he's ecstatic to have found himself a kindred spirit." She noted. "Though why do you keep calling him my 'little snow-prince'?" It was admittedly a rather cute nickname, but did Hans actually believe Olaf was next in line to the throne because he saw Olaf as her magic snow child. She didn't know how she felt about that, even if it was just another jest.
  Hans chuckled a little. "Because the first thing I asked was 'is he in line for the crown', and I noticed you never actually answered that question." Hans laughed into his hand, a little impish again. "I know he's probably not, because that would be a clerical nightmare, but it's a very cute thought and I can't help but find it endearing. He is very much like a child, so I rather want to treat him like one." That said some pleasant things about Hans, and how he spoke to children, at least. "Excitement and adventure do go along delightfully well, perhaps that's why we get on. I've built my life around a yearning for adventure, and the excitement that goes with that feeds stories."
  "I think I might have missed the question entirely, because my mind was certainly preoccupied about other things when Olaf entered," She admitted. "Oh, he’s definitely not in line, though I will admit it's an endearing idea. But could you even imagine? Just thinking about it is giving me a headache, Arendelle being ruled by a living snowman, but certainly another interesting read for the history books, for sure. No offense to Olaf, but I don't think he's cut out to be king, it would certainly bore him to death," she lightly snickered, shaking her head at the silly notion. "Though it makes me wonder if he would disappear if I-" she brushed that thought away with a jerk of her head "... it's probably best not think too deeply about this silly little 'what if'."
  "Perhaps you could accompany Olaf on a little adventure around Arendelle someday, I'm sure Olaf would appreciate it, he's always eager to do anything to quench his infinite boredom, and you could always tell me the story of your quest afterwards," she suggested with a smile. It was a silly little idea, but she was sure the two childish boys would enjoy it.
Hans gave a slightly strained smile. "No, probably best not." He agreed, because he knew what the 'what if' was, too.
  "There's a nice thought. Maybe I'll give us a task the next time he's annoying you and Anna, and I'll 'babysit' the snowman. What else is a fool good for, if not entertaining the children?" He smiled a little, impishly, as if daring her to argue that he wasn't the fool or shouldn't boil himself down like that. "Perhaps that would be a fun children's story on its own, the snow-king, all about a snowman king in a world full of human kings. What a funny thought. I can't imagine him being adult enough to wear a crown, let alone use its power."
  "Hm. That's not exactly how I was envisioning it," she bobbed her head a bit. "I was thinking something more for the fun of it, I thought you'd enjoy exploring together as friends, instead as a nanny watching over a child," she shrugged. "Oh, and fools are good for far greater things, but seem to be too stubborn to see it." She glanced at him with a half smile before taking to another sip of her tea.
  "I really can't imagine Olaf ever really growing up, perhaps growing a little wiser, but magical snowmen don't really age like people so it's really hard to know." She shrugged again." And yes, the snow-king does sound like it'd make rather an interesting story," she agreed. "Maybe another story you can tell Olaf sometime... and perhaps me too." she added a bit shyly. "I do enjoy listening to your stories, fact or fiction, you make them so vivid and immersive. You really are a great storyteller you know, ever consider writing one?"
  "Oh it would still be a friendly adventure. But when else do I leave the castle, but when I have a task?" He was task-driven, it seemed, and perhaps he too was only just noticing that fact. "I used to write, but I would always burn the pages, remember?" He remarked, perhaps a bit more quietly. The only examples of his handwriting that he knew of, unbeknownst to him, were locked in her desk drawer. "I don't like to share thoughts I've written. To me they always carry the threat of being evidence to some unknown failure. Sooner or later someone will find it out and confront me with it." It was so petty, but that was his life in the Isles. Constantly picked apart by petty quibbles.
  "Oh, right, sorry," she said softly with a somber sigh. She hadn't forgotten, she just didn't think he would still worry about that anymore. 
 "It's one of those things you don't want to draw attention to yourself over...but I really don't think anyone would hold it against you here, in Arendelle at least, especially not with something as innocent as sharing a story. From what I got to read, you are quite a riveting writer, I'm sure people would approve and..." she paused, realizing her knack was probably kicking in, she frowned a little bit to herself, her tone turned more apologetic. "...pay me no mind, it was just a silly idea." Her bottom lip curled underneath the top one as she stared down into her tea cup. It was disheartening that he still believed he'd get reprimanded for expressing himself that way. He should be feel free to write without the looming fear of some unforeseen failure, over something so trivial. He wrote so eloquently in her eyes, a bit of a shame it was something he wasn't willing to share with others, because she believed they would enjoy reading his storytelling.
Hans looked curious. "No, go on? You rarely say so much, you must be passionate about the subject. I'm humbled to think that the subject would be my writing, of all things." He seemed quietly proud, and very humbled by the idea. "What are fools good for, if not silly ideas?"
Elsa lifted her gaze. "Oh, uh all I was really going to say was that I think people would enjoy reading your writing, but if you didn't want to bring attention to yourself, you could always share anonymously or using some alias," she suggested a bit sheepishly.
  Hans smiled a bit at that. "Not a bad thought, I suppose." He admitted gently. "I'll consider it, at least. It would be nice to see if people enjoy my stories." He sounded humble, maybe even shy of the prospect.
  Elsa smiled faintly, her eyes softening. She was happy he would at least consider it, that felt like an accomplishment to her.
  He shifted, almost uncomfortably, but he was still smiling. 
 "Never be afraid to voice your thoughts in your own kingdom, your Majesty. You're the Queen. Your opinion is the correct opinion, or at the very least the one that matters the most in most conversations you'll ever have here. It's okay to be confident now and then."
  Hans' formality got her out of her head, breaking the gaze she hadn't realized she'd been holding. She was definitely more confident when it came to giving her opinions on actual official matters as Queen, but for whatever reason when it came to more casual interactions with people (which were only a few) she definitely became more diffident. Perhaps because during those more personal times she tended to momentarily forget she was Queen and ended up behaving more like a normal person, which she really didn't have much experience in, so of course she was a little more awkward.
 "Yes, of course," she said in a more serious tone, her gaze fixed on the far wall. She was perhaps a little embarrassed of being reminded.
  Hans pondered her a moment, noting that she seemed difficult to jar from her thoughts.
 "Of course, you're a human, too." He pointed out, gently. "I've heard it said that part of a fool's job is to remind kings that they, too, are men. You're a human, you're allowed to make mistakes, and to be without poise once in a while. It's a difficult thing for royals to learn. We spend so much time learning how to be perfect, that it's hard to remember that we aren't, and never will be. That's part of why I tried to get the hell out of the castle when I got the chance. I was always trying to raft away from the island as a boy, there was a standing order for years that if anyone saw a raft in the water they were meant to look for me and make sure I didn't end up drowning somewhere. Funny enough, I ended up nearly drowning far more often as a Navy man." He transitioned seamlessly from gentle coaxing her out of her reveries into amusing childhood tales, just to try and cheer her. He was good at being a Fool.
  She returned her gaze to him. "How many times have you almost drowned? I think you've only told me about the sirens." 
 It was probably not the part she was supposed to retain out of what he'd been saying, but it was the one that piqued her curiosity.
  He thought about it and shrugged. "Not really something I keep track of, honestly. Are we only counting times we've been resuscitated? If so, then never, but only barely. But if we're talking about nearly passing out, it happens with fair regularity for various reasons. Usually me trying to be clever, is the root cause of it. And I am, but it has the side-effect of nearly killing me in the process." He laughed a little at that. "I'm not afraid of drowning, it's the coming back that hurts. I've never had to be resuscitated, but choking on inhaled seawater is never a fun experience."
  "I can only imagine," Elsa replied pithily with a slight shiver and perhaps somewhat more withdrawn than before. She had innocently asked the question out of what she assumed to be pure curiosity, yet perhaps there was more to why that topic had specifically caught her attention, and she just hadn't realized it right away. She seemed to have started slipping into her daze once Hans mentioned that he wasn't afraid of drowning.
  Hans noticed her slipping. It seemed to be happening a lot, that day. Usually that was his job. He stood, and moved to sit directly next to her, whereupon he offered her his hand. "Something is troubling you, my lady. A pence for your thoughts?" He asked, gently. "You're dwelling on death, I know the feeling."
  Elsa's eyes followed him as Hans made his way to sit beside her. How did he always seem to be able to read her so well? She didn’t deny his observation for it was true and instead let out a faint sough that accompanied the long breath that escaped her. Her hand easily placed itself in his without much hesitation, thankful to be surrounded in it's warmth yet again.
  Elsa took in a gasp of air and slowly began to speak, if softly and still a bit detached, but at least trying to voice what was troubling her mind. 
 "They were only supposed to be gone a fortnight,"she began, her fingers tightening their curl around his hand. "I asked them if they had to go... they said I'd be fine, of course that wasn't what I had been worried about." She grew quiet again.
  Hans softened and held her hand without a word for a while, tightening his grasp in a warming sort of way. He only wanted to help. 
 "You had every reason to be afraid. Few from land consider the unknowns of the sea." He admitted, reassuring her with a sort of calm. He kept his voice down so she could contemplate it in her own time, but he stayed with her there. 
 "Never walk into a sea of doubt alone, you may need someone to pull you back out. Go on ahead with your thoughts, I've got you." He suspected she needed to process some thoughts and be reassured. He would be there to tell her it wasn't her fault, and she could move on. It might not fix everything, but he thought it might help her handle it.
  Elsa had never gotten time to properly process the passing of her parents, even now she had never really talked about it in depth with her own sister. It had been around five years now and it still weighed heavy on her heart, how she couldn't even embrace them before they'd left, or how she couldn't be present at their memorial, and worst of all how she could not mourn alongside her own sister in their mutual time of heartache. And all that additional regret just because of her powers and the fear that used to consume her. The warmth and clasp of his hand around hers, help anchor her from going too deep into the dark sea of her subconscious. She took another deep breath before she began to speak again, this time a little more audible than the last. 
 "I know it was out of my control, but a part of me still wonders that if I tried a little harder perhaps I could have convinced them to stay." she sighed. "It aches my heart that I wasn't able to give them a proper goodbye." There was a slight wavering to her voice. Her eyes became slightly watery, but tears still at bay.
  "Here, now. Those what-ifs will be the death of you. They're always deceptive little things, questions as small as thumb tacks that will pierce holes in your heart. Parents never listen to their children, they had work to do, and they likely would have done it regardless how you felt. By your grace in letting them leave, they could at least know that you weren't greatly distressed when they left. They could remember their calm and thoughtful daughter and their upbeat and bright daughter, and they wouldn't feel they had made your last memory of them miserable." He didn't know if that would help, but he tried to think of what he would have wanted to hear. "It's okay to be unhappy about it, though. Don't think of the impossible 'what if's. It's said that we don't mourn for the dead, we mourn for the living they left behind. Be sad, mourn for your loss. And if you need a shoulder to cry on or arms to be held by, I'll volunteer mine any day." Was that too forward? He felt it was only right. He felt he understood her misery.
  Elsa listened and felt a bit relieved just receiving reassurance. 
 “Thank you," she said softly, giving Hans' hand a firm squeeze. Letting herself lean in a bit closer to Hans.
  Hans nodded. "What are fools for?" He joked gently. He shifted to settle, and opened an arm for her. She could keep holding his hand, or she could accept his arms and let him hold her. He told himself it was just because she was mourning, and he knew it would help her feel better. He tried to tell himself that was the only reason she might accept, too.
  She saw his opened arm as an invitation for an embrace, now the question remained of whether or not she would accept it. She was perfectly content the way they were now, holding his hand, it was in itself nice and warm, but a hug on the other hand could be a lot nicer and more comforting. It wouldn’t be the first time they embraced and Elsa really did like warm hugs, even if she wouldn't openly admit it like Olaf. It would make her a bit nervous being that close to Hans, but that was insignificant if she could surround herself in more of his warmth. It was a tough decision, but in the end she went with the one that felt the most right. Elsa slowly let go of her clasp on his hand, freeing his arm so he could hold her.
 Hans was at least a little bit surprised, but he thought that was probably a good sign. He rearranged himself to pull her close, as he would a good friend. He did wonder if that might seem a bit too intimate, though. 
 "Is this okay?" He asked, hoping that it was. She was surprisingly warming, for an ice queen. Or maybe that was him blushing, it was hard to say.
  "Mmhm," she answered with a nod. Elsa was quite used to receiving close and personal embraces from her sister, Hans was no Anna of course, yet their hugs felt somewhat similar, experience wise at least. Both their embraces made her feel safe and warm. The differences really boiled down to how they felt physically. Anna felt more soft, while Hans was not necessarily more stiff but certainly firmer. Their proportions and how they held her was different of course, Hans was far bulkier than Anna that was relatively the same her, and with Hans being taller as well it made his head float over hers. It also seemed their body temperature differed, Hans always felt somewhat warmer, yet her constant flushing whenever they came into close contact might have also played a part in why that seemed to be the case. Another difference that was perhaps strange to admit she took notice of was their scents. Anna always had a sweet aroma about her, Elsa hadn't figured out what exactly Hans' scent was yet but it was far muskier, that's for sure.
  Hans was sorely tempted to rest his chin on the top of her head, but he possessed just enough sense of decorum to realize he probably shouldn't treat the Queen of the country he now lived in like a small child. But, she seemed like she needed that warmth. At the very least, he held her close and petted her back, to try and calm her and help her feel better. Admittedly, he wasn't sure what to do after that. He would let her lead, and think of himself as just there for emotional support, as long as she wanted him there for.
In his embrace she no longer restrained the flow of tears she’d been holding back and began to sob silently. Finally letting the sorrow that's been stewing inside her to seep out. Allowing herself to grieve was a necessary process in enabling her heart to heal and overcome her anguish. 
 Her tears slowly began to fade away as she closed her eyes and let herself get lost in the warmth that blanketed her. It was so calming just to be cradled in his arms. She stayed perfectly still a long while, clearing her mind of everything, but the bliss of the moment. Hans always seemed to have a way of easing away her worries.
 In their silent embrace all she could really hear was breathing and the palpitations of Hans' heart, which was rather soothing for a time, until eventually his heartbeat started to evoke a resemblance to a ticking clock, which prompted her back to reality, realizing that she might have been holding on too long and that tea time wouldn't last forever. 
 Elsa recognized that separating from their embrace might be equally or more awkward than initiating it. She started to shift her body slightly, slowly pulling her body away from Hans’.
 "I'm sorry if this is not the tea time you were expecting, but thank you for indulging me regardless," she said earnestly.
Hans smiled a little anyway, as she pulled away, to encourage her. As much as he enjoyed that moment, it also made him wonder if he deserved it, and the more he thought along those lines, the more anxious he became. 
 "No apologies necessary, I'm glad to help," He assured. "I hope tea time isn't over already? I believe I promised to play for you." He pointed out sweetly. He would remember holding her for some time, but he wanted to linger on the moment for a little while. As anxious as he was, it was still a very pleasant experience.
Even as they were prying apart from each other, there was a part of her that wished it could just stay nestled in his caress. As the distance between them increased Elsa still didn't seem to feel the warmth dissipate, yet that was likely due to all the blood deciding to rush to her face (which made it the only thing she could really sense at the moment). 
"We still have some time, besides this tea time couldn't possibly be over before even getting the chance of listening to you play the harp," she reassured with a soft smile. It was the reason they originally planned to meet in the first place after all, they just ended up getting a little sidetracked along the way. Undoubtedly a little awkward and unexpected, but it had been pleasant overall as they continued to comfort each other with their company.
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