#but I gotta learn its okay to ramble nonsense sometimes

[change-name-later]

Gonna make a quick post bc I wanna share.

Disclaimer, this is not at all a super serious theory. I know the show works with cartoon logic. If the writers want stakes high, they’ll make them high. And if not, the character will bounce right back. Simple as that. This is just meant as more of a in universe explanation than anything.

Anyways. As goofy as it sounds. I think intent 100% determines if a character dies or not.

Because thinking about it. Any time a character accidentally “kills” someone. The other character doesn’t stay dead.

For example, in “Trash Friends”. Smg3 gets startled when Smg4 bursts into his cafe. He shoots him out of reflex. And Smg4 stands back up a second later. No big deal. Everyone’s fine.

But! If someone has the intention to kill someone. Suddenly it’s a serious life or death situation. Example, in “You Used To Be Cool”. Smg3 is told to kill Smg4 to “prove” he’s still a villian. Smg3 seriously considers it. And when he goes and confronts Smg4. It becomes a tense scene between the two.

The only difference here is that Smg3 was intending on doing it. Or at least, that’s what Smg4 thought at that moment. The intention was there. And therefore, meant the possibility of actually killing him was 100% there.

Anywhoo. This isn’t meant to be super serious or in-depth by any means. I’m just putting an idea out there. I know there’s a lot of holes in this. So please do not take it seriously 😭

[tillman]

Different Anon, but if it’s okay, do you have any tips of how to freestyle draw with pens? A huge hurdle that I face is that the fear of messing up things and being unable to erase them.

yeah thats the main thing u gotta like. learn to get over if u wanna do work in pens. i think naturally i just tend to embrace that kinda stuff as all the traditional art i do i literally. can not fix it if i fuck up so i just roll with the punches (print making the best u can do is glue lino back i guess and ink. dear god ink.) so i think on one hand like. just fucking around for a while IS a major way to get over it. which is advice i have but i thikn just embracing the nonsense can be fun but GOD i understand how hard it is to just hear that and not be able to DO that.

one tip i have if u wanna do somethign in all pen is to actually VERY loosely sketch it in pencil beforehand. i mean like fucking gesture levels of sketching just to get a flow of it down. pens i think are hard to get into using completely because they feel more final and its hard to get the same flow u can with pencils if ur not used to them, so like having a simple line or two to show how u want the piece to flow can also help! i do that sometimes when planning illustrations ?

other than that i think people push too hard to keep how they draw digitally and how they draw traditionally separate when personally thats like. how i developed my digital style. i worked VERY hard to make my brushes feel like my favorite pens do, just with things i wish my pens had. so i dunno if that helps but i think making an effort to draw as you draw digitally or vise versa can actually help if u do both. i dunno i am completely rambling i hope any of this helps at all ! gl!! I think pens are VERY fun and i personally love seeing like. little goofs in art so im not the best to ask for for this oew84thi. 

[shortmania]

I know people really like the idea of Gertie actually being sane for the most part and just messing with people -- Craig included -- but I’ve gotta be honest. That... bugs me. A lot. And I think I prefer her to actually have dementia.

Strike that. I do prefer it. I really prefer it.

This has been bugging me for a long time. I never said anything about it for a lot of reasons, but now that Craig’s just outright stated it in interview and made it impossible to wave away as a mere headcanon, I feel like I kind of have to. Maybe I’m just being sensitive, but the idea that anyone would fake that level of instability for the hell of it is....

I’m trying to be delicate about this because I do understand the mindset Craig has and the logic behind it and I want to be respectful of his creation, but it hurts. It’s actually painful to think about. It doesn’t make me mad. It makes me upset. And maybe I really am the only one, but I’d like to explain why anyway. Beyond the intensely personal reasons, because frankly, fuck those.

Explanation under the cut.

I don’t wanna be that caustic tumblr asshole who says something really trite like “mental illness isn’t a joke” and completely bypasses the reality of what’s going on with the situation -- the reality being that both Gertie and Phil are meant to be living parodies of elderly stereotypes, and Craig of course only has the best intentions -- but I’ve got to be honest with myself. The joke, when played to this extent, isn’t very funny to me, so it’s hard for me to shrug off as just another headcanon-y thing I was wrong about and move on.

Maybe it would’ve been easier at one point. Craziness is funny as an objective idea. It’s wacky and off the wall and in direct opposition to what’s considered socially acceptable and that’s what makes it fun. And to that extent, I get it. I used to like faking craziness when I was a kid, too. My friends and I would “overdose” on smarties and walk into walls and make dumb faces and fake amnesia, and from an adult’s perspective it sounds dark, but we were just kids. And HEY ARNOLD!, for all its fundamental maturity, is a kids show. I guess I always just saw Gertie’s behavior through that lens--of us only ever being shown what was appropriate for children. What children would be able to understand and enjoy without having to worry about any of the deeper implications. Much the same way Miriam mumbling to herself, stumbling around and hugging her blender was played for laughs.

But then you get older, and things like that stop being funny because you’ve known someone with dementia. You’ve known someone with schizophrenia. You’ve known people with alzheimers. You’ve seen people actually knock into walls, and actually overdose, and make dumb faces that they don’t know they’re making and not remember things they promised at one time they would always remember. You’ve known alcoholics. And it isn’t particularly funny, and you couldn’t fully get that as a kid because you were a kid.

But you’re an adult now, and when you’re an adult, you see things differently.

Gertie is an adult, so. I guess the long and short of this is: if Gertie is capable of faking dementia because she thinks it’s funny and she likes acting ridiculous 24/7, enough to willingly sacrifice her loved one’s emotional well-beings -- including her orphaned grandson’s -- then I hate her. I think she’s a horrible person and she shouldn’t have children, let alone grandchildren.

I guess it really is as simple as that. I get why it’s supposed to be funny, and I get how it might be fun as a concept, but it’s not funny or fun to me. It’s really just not, and I can’t get past that.

Gertie is delusional. Gertie dresses up in elaborate costumes and takes time to fashion her hair into complicated updos and talks nonsense and frequently looks confused. Gertie has moments of lucidity where she does understand that something important is happening, but these moments are brief and she is unable to hold full conversations so she leaves those up to Phil in spite of his incompetence. Gertie has never had a single conversation with Arnold that lasted longer than a few minutes and remained grounded in reality. Gertie is an intelligent and imaginative woman, so her delusions have intelligent and imaginative foundations, but at the end of the day, they are still delusions.

Gertie interrupted dinner during The Family Man with an announcement that she was Marie Queen of Scotts, thus destroying any chance Mr. Hyunh had of getting a promotion. Gertie regularly ruins holidays and events by insisting they are an entirely different holiday, forcing everyone to go along with her plans in spite of their unhappiness. Gertie has lost all sense of self-preservation. Gertie has stolen the Packard before and driven with Arnold in the car despite not having a license. Gertie got thrown in jail and thought it was a game. Gertie makes Phil angry, annoyed, exasperated and sometimes just plain distressed on a regular basis with her loud proclamations, melodramatic rambles and grandiose antics. Gertie sleeps in a separate bed from Phil. Phil flirts with and propositions other women because his wife hasn’t been his wife in years and he’s given up on her ever being fully herself again.

It is messed up and I’m sure it must bother some people to think of it this way, but it never bothered me. I could laugh at Gertie in spite of her mental illness, for two reasons: 1) frankly, watching her isn’t unlike watching Eugene fall down a manhole or get hit by a bus, and 2) because that’s a way of dealing with the trauma of life. You laugh at it. You laugh, because it lessens its weight and lets you breathe. You laugh, because you can’t do a damn thing to change it. That’s just the way things are sometimes, and it can be sad, but once you’ve accepted it and learned how to smile in its face despite having this understanding, it becomes much easier to live. I think this is an important lesson. Arnold recognizes his grandma’s illness, and it frustrates him sometimes, but he can still smile and laugh with her and love her. Eugene probably falls down a hundred manholes a week and breaks at least one bone every day, but has anyone ever seen him stop smiling for longer than a few seconds? These facts, fictional as they are, are precious to me, and though I do regret calling Craig out like this, I won’t apologize.

...Okay, honestly, Eugene has some emotional problems, but my point stands

This is the way I see it and this is the way I will continue to see it in spite of this interview and any passing comments made in TJM. I don’t like going against canon or Craig, but this is one point I can’t budge on. Because I guess I am a bit of a tumblr asshole in spite of myself, and I don’t want to hate Gertie. 

That’s about the size of it.

[strikes-goyle]

Car Park (2/?)|| Goyle Men|| Self-para

“The biggest thing here Greg is ta signal. Its the only way all the other cars know what you’re doing.”

“But there’s some snow on the ground.” 

“Don’t worry about the snow, its only a sprinkle.” Ramsey brushed the concern off impatiently. “Yer just gunna have to drive a bit slower tha’s all. Its not like yer only ever gunna be driving in the summer time.”

Gregory bit his lip but he turned the key, slipping the car effortlessly into first. 

“Hey now! That was good!” Ramsey chided, causing the grin to grow on his son’s face. It was always exciting when he caught his son learning, kids were pretty awesome in that way. 

“So wanna tell me what that fire call was about the other day?” Ramsey probed, raising a brow in Greg’s direction. 

Greg’s face fell and he focused more intently on the road, giving a half shrug. 

“Turn up here and head to the lights. We’re gunna go to the shops to practise parking,” Ramsey explained. The boy’s skill behind the wheel hadn’t been enough to do anything more complicated than just driving straight, but Ramsey thought it was about time they finally tried. 

“But, theres other cars in there!” Greg exclaimed, raising his brows at his father. He didn’t think he was ready. He’d just gotten stopping down, and even then, he still stalled the engine every so often. 

“You’ll be fine. I’m right here. We’ll go to the far end of the car park.” Ramsey reassured him, pointing to the driveway. Greg sighed heavily but followed the directions, slowing his speed and dodging trollies and other cars. There were people everywhere on the beautiful sunny winter afternoon. 

“You didn’t seem very happy when we picked you up.. Are you not enjoying school?” Ramsey tried probing his son again, determined to get to the bottom of the problem. Both him and Charlotte sensed something was up with Greg ever since he came home for Christmas holidays. 

“Nah, its okay. I like Hogwarts...” Greg shrugged, turning the wheel and trying to line up with the little laneway. He scanned for a parking spot to try to do an easy pull through, preferably one with no other cars. 

“You know.. just because me and Crabby are best mates don’ mean you and Vinnie need to -”

“What? Nah Vin’s my best mate,” Greg chuckled. Parents were so dense sometimes. 

“Well is it that Malfoy tosser?” Ramsey chuckled.

“Just cuz you don’ like em don’t mean I have to. Dad, he’s my friend.” Gregory snapped defensively. 

“Ok alright,” Ramsey raised a hand, before pointing. “Pull in there.” He pointed to an empty space. 

Greg tried, misjudging the size of the car and ending up on one of the yellow lines. 

“Its fine, pull out and readjust.” He directed. Greg struggled to get the fussy shifter into reverse, turning the steering wheel in the wrong direction, which Ramsey was quick to correct. 

“Other way, you silly muggle.” Ramsey teased, pulling the steering wheel to help. Greg swatted him away however and Ramsey sighed. Teenagers were so touchy. 

“You know sometimes having a couple really great mates is better than having a whole whack of friends.” Ramsey explained. “Just a couple buddies that really have yer back, yah know?”

Greg probably would have said something to brush his father off, but the backing out took too much concentration. He had to stop abruptly for a lady and her two little witches that were skipping all over the parking lot. 

“You just sorta gotta keep yer head down and do your time, then get out, right? Best not to get involved with the other junk, yah know? Stay away from those other trouble makers in your year ‘n that. Its really easy to get wrapped up into all sorts.” Ramsey continued to ramble, though looking to his son for some acknowledgment. 

“hm,” Greg replied with a half nod. 

“I remember back when I was there-”

Greg made a face and barked a laugh. “Dad that was a million years ago. Things have definitely changed.”

“Not a million.. I ain’ that old. And teenagers are still the same.” Ramsey pouted back. “I just don’t want you getting involved in any of that other nonsense.” he reiterated. 

Greg knew what he was implying. They both did. Things had changed in the last 5 years, Hogwarts had changed. 

“You just gotta keep yer head about you. Stay away from that Potter boy, and do what yer told. She tells you to jump, you jump okay? Greg? Okay?”

“Yah okayyyyy. I get it.” Gregory rolled his eyes at his father’s worrying. 

“I need you to promise me, buddy.” The car stopped in the space, and Greg pulled up the parking break, signalling that the park was complete. 

“Okay. I promise.” he sighed. If it would make his father happy and end the conversation, than he’d promise. It wasn't that he didn’t mean it, its just his dad didn’t understand what it was like. “She just wears a lot of pink, looks like a life sized pigmy puff.” He added with a laugh, joined immediately by his father. 

[erosanova-blog]

The Magic Hour

Warning: Explicit Language. Mostly nonsense.

I want the reader to know that I am not under the influence of drugs or alcohol, merely lost in a lack of sleep. Ahhh the painful insomniac. Didn't I wake up at 4 yesterday...? Wait was that today..? I haven't slept who knows? But what else is a man to do on a Saturday night?

2:58 a.m. This is where the magic happens. The lonely writer types, chewing on a minty flosspick while the African Dwarf Frogs(Hymenochirus curtipes) echo in the background, undoubtedly heckling each other and their tank mates, the ghost shrimp(Paleomonetes sp.). Why am I still awake? Is it a result of an obsession with social media? Perhaps, my thumbs have been rather sore as of late. But let's get down to the real nitty-gritty; why not we're all mostly insane friends here right? Shit I just hit the number lock. At this time of night, you really have to wonder what an esoteric button like that even does.

Oh the lucidity. Shhh quiet Frog and Toad! Yes I named them. Why not? The ghost shrimp are Casper and Glassy wtf do you want me to do about it? Glass Shrimp is synonymous with Ghost Shrimp as far as common names go. At this hour, you have to wonder if I really have to capitalize a common name. And I say yes, they are my fuckin' pets bro, they're important to me. But enough of that nonsense. Back to the nitty-gritty, as aforementioned.

The real reason why I'm probably awake is I tend to think too much. That's what got me into this mess. That's what gets me into a lot of messes. I pity the simpleton that can go through life complacent and detached. I'm not saying I'm a damn genius, far from it, but I think constantly. My mind comes up with (sometimes a bit on the... creative side) the depths of unfathomable consequences and possibilities... permutations if you will. I'm not a psychic, I just tend to think ahead. Thinking ahead is like driving too fast on a mountain pass: you can't always accurately predict what's on the road ahead. Wow what a life lesson. HA!

3:20 a.m. It's cold in this basement apartment. I have the heater on economy mode... meaning it works half the time. It's like buying juice and you think you're getting a fucking deal and then it's 17% juice. Thanks for the overpriced water assholes.

Do you see now? Have you begun to understand the nonsensical bullshit I can come up with at this hour? I MISSPELLED TOO BACK THERE! Can you believe that? Luckily I caught it but... whew.. close one. Fuck. (shh that definitely wasn't a sentence fragment and those little red lines under my fucking shh back there (and apparently right there), those obviously don't exist(imaginary, like the tooth fairy or... another... fairy (Easter bunny maybe? Think about that, a fucking rabbit that shits chocolate eggs. What if it switches over from chocolate to regular and you don't know it and then one day... ohhh nooo... wait am I really doing this? Longest paragraph in multiple-parentheses ever!) so don't get too carried away bro... can I call you bro?)-By the way I learned how to do all those parentheses correctly thanks to Calculus... Thanks CSU... Thanks Newton... Leibniz..

Well instead of insulting deceased mathematical theorists I should get down to the real nitty-gritty. Regret. Sometimes all this excess thinking makes me say things to people I care about, perhaps accusations, that are sometimes ridiculous. The problem with opening Pandora's box is once it's open, everything is unleashed.

Humpty dumpty in real life? Fuckin dead. A fuckin omelet bro. Its true google it. I may be lying. Alright my eyelids have begun a slow shutter speed so I should probably get to bed but I have a few final notes for the reader, if anyone is actually reading this. This may get preachy so if you want to start sending me hate mail... just shut the hell up I'm not trying to influence anybody just speaking my personal opinions, which is protected under the Bill of Rights.

Being in a relationship for money, power or fame is fucked up. Make your own way, pave your own path, and find your passion in life. Be a fucking legend, don't live like a sidekick.

It takes two (or sometimes three... or more... fuck idk people do what you want damn its a free country for the most part) people to make a relationship work. You have to stick together, and be honest. It's the hardest thing to do but it goes the farthest. If you don't want to be with them, tell them... don't break their fucking heart like a mirror on the freeway, be gentle, but be fair.

It is NOT okay to hit a woman. Or drug a woman. Or touch a woman without her permission. Actually you probably shouldn't be doing that shit to anybody, what the fuck is wrong with people? All this talk I hear of the date rape drug being back in circulation... what is this the seventies?! For fuck's sake people... have some respect. Have some fucking morals. Quit living YOLO like nothing fucking matters. IF YOU DRUG A GIRL AND HAVE SEX WITH HER SEMI-CONCIOUS BODY THERE WILL BE CONSEQUENCES. That's not a threat, it just needs to be said. Yeah you think its funny now, yeah you get off the hook with the law and all big fucking whoop. But guess what? Thirty years down the road, (if you're not still a total piece of shit that lives in a bowling alley and drinks turpentine) you're going to regret it. I hope it eats at you... the best punishment is one's own mind (funny how I came back to that huh? But I generally try to do good :))

Getting married to save your relationship won't save you're relationship. It will subject you to a mass amount of turmoil, paperwork, bullshit and red tape. If you get married, make sure it is the one that gives you a look that's a combination of digesting you with their eyes (in a good way, not a Jack-the-Ripper-hooker way. A feeling like you're almost tempted to rip their clothes off right then and there-with consent! see above!) and a look that says they want to spend their life in your arms. A look like them tearing up at the thought of you leaving... almost at the brink, the cusp, but too strong to let the tears flow... maybe a quivering lip).

Respect your parents, at the very least, respect your mother. You realize what giving birth is like right? I don't give a damn if it's a C-section or natural or fucking water birth you were once a baby coming out of her. Ouch. Respect that. There are circumstances in which a parental figure abuses a child. ALSO NOT OKAY! Yeah I was spanked as a child, and yeah, most of the time I deserved it. But my mom never raised a fist to me... She never brought out the belt (though she had this wicked paddle that somehow disappeared in a mysterious driveway fire...) out and she always encouraged me to find happiness.

Find happiness, find your passion. Am I rambling again? What is this a Sunday sermon? Holy shit its Sunday... that's blasphemous... no offense everybody religious! Fuck. Walking on eggshells around here. Find your happiness, find your passion and quit taking offense to everything Americans, you're making us look bad. Shit man we're the whiners of the world, and we're going downhill because of it. Instead of complaining about the piece of trash on the ground reach down and pick that fucker up! (I think that's from an old commercial).

I don't care who you are, sex, race, religion, gender, sexual preference etc etc etc etc etc... respect your country. I didn't say you have to agree with your leaders, I'm not stating my political preference because I'm not a fucking whiny baby that doesn't stand up for the Pledge of Allegiance. I stand up because my grandpa, for which I have a deep respect, fought in the Korean War. He fought for our country. This gentle man, who taught me how to care for animals of all different kinds (not specifically just how to approach, etc) killed people. You think he knows why he killed them? Probably something they amped him up on at the time, but regardless, he had a red right hand for his country. So you can sit in your Mercedes with your Starbucks and play your PS4 (I love Mercedes and Starbucks. I have no preference for video games) on a bright sunny day in summertime without being murdered or raped.

3:59 a.m. Last one for tonight... wrote way more than I should've anyways, and probably enough to piss some people off if they ever read it.

If you find that person with that glimmer in their eye when they see you... and you feel it too... don't let it go.

_______________________________________________________________________________

I had to add these quotes today, 4/23/17 at 4:15 p.m because I can't stop thinking about it, ..., last night...

"I wanna die where the sun sets, where there's no rain clouds... floating beneath my wings... floating beneath my wings. And if I had one reason... to stay right here... it would be all for you... it would be all for you.

...

And on the other hand, if I woulda stayed, maybe we could fix it all, maybe it would change. Or maybe not, or maybe not today but if we both want it bad baby there's a way. I say we should have no worries, we could be together now, no hurry. You ain't gotta quit, I ain't gotta leave. We could move slow, baby, we ain't gotta speed. I'm not quittin'... never ever, I... pinky promise. If your hand gets cold then I put a ring up on it. I... cook you noodles when your tummy don't feel right... that's how I kill nights... because it feels right... yeah... because it feels right... it ain't real love if there ain't real fights... work it out yeah we still might... we ain't perfect... but... this is real life.

... And if I had one reason, to stay right here... it would be all for you, it would be all for you." -"Where the Sun Sets" -Ryan Caraveo