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lvmoure · 2 days ago

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ATLANTIS CS55

Pairings: Carlos Sainz x pregnant!reader

Summary: In which he was too late

Warnings: angst, miscarriage

The morning light filtered softly through the curtains of your apartment, a golden warmth that felt at odds with the cold knot of anxiety twisting in your stomach. You sat at the kitchen table, staring at the small white plastic stick in your hand as if it would suddenly change its mind. The words on it were undeniable, though—bold and clear. You were pregnant.

For a moment, everything felt still, like time had decided to hold its breath along with you. Your heart hammered in your chest, loud enough to echo in your ears, yet the rest of the world seemed so quiet. It felt as if you were trapped between two realities—one where you were the same person you had been just a few days ago and another where this tiny, growing life inside you would change everything.

You knew exactly what this meant. Your mind raced through the tangled maze of questions. What would Carlos think? What would he do? The two of you had never discussed children—not seriously, anyway. Sure, you’d talked about the future in vague terms, but when it came to family, he had always been clear. He wasn't ready, he wasn't sure he wanted them. He was focused on his career, his racing. His life was full of ambition and passion for a world that didn’t leave room for a baby, let alone a family.

But here you were, pregnant.

Your breath hitched as you glanced at the clock. Carlos would be home soon. You had no idea how you were going to tell him. How do you share news like this? The kind of news that could make or break everything you thought you knew about each other? You had hoped the moment would never come, or maybe that you'd be able to convince yourself it was a mistake, that maybe those two lines weren’t as clear as they seemed. But deep down, you knew they were real.

You tried to imagine his reaction. Would he be angry? Would he be scared? Would he think this was something you had planned all along, to trap him into something he didn’t want? The thought sent a chill through you. Carlos wasn't like that. He wasn't someone to dismiss your feelings, but you knew he wouldn’t take kindly to something that disrupted his carefully mapped out future.

His career, his freedom—it was all he had worked for, and now it felt like it was all on the line.

You stared at your reflection in the window, watching your own face morph into one of uncertainty. You didn’t know how to navigate this conversation, how to make him understand. You weren’t ready for this either, but this was reality now. And the hardest part was telling him.

When the door clicked open, Carlos stepped into the apartment, his familiar scent filling the room. You looked up, your stomach tightening as his eyes met yours.

"Hey," he said, setting his helmet and racing gear down in the hallway before walking over to you. His smile was soft, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes, not like it usually did. There was something on your face that made him pause. Something was wrong.

You opened your mouth, but no words came out.

"What's going on?" he asked, his voice laced with concern, but you could hear the edge of hesitation in it. He knew you too well.

You swallowed hard, the lump in your throat growing with each passing second. "Carlos," you began, your voice unsteady, "there’s something I need to tell you."

His eyes softened as he sat across from you, his hand gently brushing yours. "You’re scaring me, what’s wrong?"

You looked at the pregnancy test again, then back at him, feeling your hands tremble.

"I’m pregnant."

His face fell silent for a long moment. The words hung in the air, their weight crushing you. You watched his eyes search your face as if trying to decipher if you were joking, but you couldn’t find any humor in this moment, no lightness. This wasn’t a joke.

His expression shifted, his lips tightening. His hands hovered over the table, unsure whether to reach out or pull away.

"You’re sure?" His voice was low, almost like he didn’t want to hear the answer.

You nodded, suddenly feeling smaller, as if the space between you two had doubled in size.

"I’m sure," you whispered, the weight of the admission pushing down on your chest. "Carlos, I—"

"Wait," he interrupted, his eyes now narrowing slightly, "are you telling me that you… that we…?" He trailed off, visibly processing what you had said. "But we never—"

"I know," you said quickly, your heart pounding in your ears. "I didn’t expect this either, but it’s real."

A heavy silence fell between you, and Carlos sat back in his chair, running a hand through his hair. You could see the wheels turning in his mind, the tension in his posture growing with every passing second.

"How are we supposed to—" He broke off, his voice suddenly sharp. "You know I’m not ready for this. You know that."

You flinched at the words, though they weren’t said cruelly. He was upset, overwhelmed even. But they cut deep.

"Do you think I’m ready for this?" you asked softly, your voice shaking. "Carlos, I didn’t plan this. But this is happening. And I need you to—"

"I can’t," he cut you off, his tone now more forceful. "I can’t just drop everything for this. I have my career, my goals. I can’t throw all of that away now."

Your heart shattered, the weight of his words crashing down on you. You blinked rapidly, trying to keep the tears at bay. The fear, the hurt—it all bubbled up in an overwhelming rush. "Carlos, this isn’t about you throwing everything away. It’s about us figuring this out together. I’m not asking you to throw everything away. I’m asking for your support."

But he shook his head, his jaw tight. "I don’t know if I can give that to you."

The room seemed to close in on you. Your breath was shallow, each word he spoke pressing harder against your chest. "So, what? You’re just going to walk away? You’re going to ignore everything we’ve built because of one mistake?"

"It’s not a mistake," he snapped. "But it is something I wasn’t prepared for. And I don’t think I can be."

The pain in your chest turned into something darker, deeper. The reality of the situation was settling in, and it was suffocating you. You stood up abruptly, pushing your chair back. "I never wanted this to be a fight," you whispered. "I just wanted you to understand."

Carlos stood too, his face a mix of frustration and regret. "I need time to think, okay?" His words were softer now, almost a plea for space. But it wasn’t the space you wanted.

"Time?" you repeated, your voice barely above a whisper. "How much time do you need to decide if we’re going to have a child? How much time do you need to decide if we’re going to have a future?"

Without another word, Carlos turned and walked away, leaving you in the suffocating silence of the apartment. The stillness that followed was deafening, and all you could do was sit there, your hand still clutching the test, the reality of it all crashing down around you.

Carlos’ hands gripped the steering wheel tighter than he realized as he drove away from the apartment. The tires of the car hummed on the asphalt, the road stretching endlessly before him, but his thoughts were a jumbled mess. His breath was ragged, his chest tight with confusion. The words you’d said, the look in your eyes, the way you held the pregnancy test as if it were both a lifeline and a curse—everything had blurred together into a painful knot in his stomach.

He had asked for time, needed it—desperately. Time to breathe, time to think. But the truth was, Carlos didn’t know what to think. His mind kept spiraling, trying to reason his way through something that felt so far beyond logic.

He loved you, that much was certain. But that love had never once been tied to thoughts of starting a family, to the idea of being a father. He wasn’t ready for that. He had spent his life working towards something that didn’t leave room for the responsibilities of parenthood.

But then, he saw the look on your face. He could still feel the hurt in your voice, the way you tried to explain that this wasn’t something you wanted either, but it was real. And now, he had to figure out how to navigate this.

The sun was beginning to set by the time Carlos parked his car in front of his father's house. The familiar warmth of the home did little to ease the tension that had built up inside him. He didn’t want to admit it, but he felt lost. He needed someone who could help him make sense of all this.

Carlos had always been close to his father, Carlos Sainz Sr. A man who had seen both triumphs and defeats in the world of motorsport. He knew what it was like to struggle, to fight for something you believed in, but he also knew what it meant to be a man of integrity, to face your responsibilities head-on. It was that kind of wisdom Carlos needed now.

He didn’t knock. His father’s house was always open to him, no matter what time of day it was. Carlos let himself in, finding his father in the kitchen, preparing a cup of coffee.

"Hey, Papa," Carlos said, his voice a bit hoarse as he leaned against the doorway.

Carlos Sainz Sr. looked up from his cup, his expression unreadable at first. But then, he saw the look in his son’s eyes. The kind of look that spoke volumes about a thousand unsaid things.

"Hijo, what’s wrong?" his father asked, setting the coffee down and gesturing for Carlos to sit.

Carlos hesitated for a moment before making his way to the table. He slumped into the chair across from his father, running a hand through his hair in frustration.

"I don’t know what to do, Papa," he admitted, his voice heavy with uncertainty. "I… I just found out that I’m going to be a father."

Carlos Sr. didn’t react immediately, but his eyes softened, and he took a deep breath, as though weighing his words carefully. "A father," he repeated, the weight of the word hanging in the air. "And you don’t know what to do?"

Carlos shook his head. "I never wanted this. I mean… I never planned for it. You know how I’ve always felt about kids, about having a family. I was never ready for that. I don’t know how to be a father, how to be the kind of man who can balance everything. I don’t want to let go of everything I’ve worked for. My career, my life—it all feels so out of control now."

His father sat back, folding his arms across his chest as he observed his son. The lines on Carlos Sr.’s face seemed deeper than usual, as if he had seen this moment coming from a distance.

"I understand. I understand more than you know," Carlos Sr. said quietly. "But sometimes, life has a way of throwing us challenges when we least expect it. You think you’ve got everything planned, and then something happens that changes everything. And that’s not always a bad thing. You’re scared because you feel like you’re losing control, but maybe what you’re really scared of is letting go of the idea that you can do it all on your own."

Carlos ran a hand through his hair again, frustration mixing with confusion. "I’m not ready to be a father, Papa. I’m just… not."

Carlos Sr. sighed deeply, his gaze steady and filled with a depth of understanding that only comes from years of experience. He leaned forward slightly, his voice soft but firm.

"I wasn’t ready either, Carlos," he said, and his words hit harder than Carlos expected. "When your mother told me she was pregnant with your older sister, I didn’t know how to feel. I was scared. I wasn’t sure if I could do it. I didn’t know if I could balance my career with being a father. But one thing I did know was that it wasn’t just about me anymore. It was about us—your mother and I, and the life we were going to build. And there was nothing more important than that."

Carlos Sr. paused for a moment, letting the weight of his words sink in before continuing.

"You see, when you’re faced with something like this, you have two choices. You can run away from it, avoid it, pretend it’s not happening. Or you can face it. You can stand up and accept it for what it is, and figure out how to make it work. Because when you become a father, it’s not about you anymore. It’s about the life you’re bringing into this world, and the kind of person you want to be for them."

Carlos felt a lump form in his throat as he absorbed his father’s words. His chest tightened, the reality of what his father was saying hitting him like a wave. He had always been focused on his career, on his goals, on the life he had chosen. But now, it felt like that life was being torn apart by something so much bigger than himself.

"I don’t know if I can do this, Papa," Carlos admitted, his voice faltering.

Carlos Sr. stood up, walking over to the window and looking out at the garden. When he spoke again, his voice was softer, tinged with the wisdom of years of experience.

"You’re not alone, Carlos. You don’t have to figure this out on your own. You have people who love you, who want to support you. You have her—" He gestured toward the door, toward the life Carlos had just walked away from. "She’s in this with you. And you need to talk to her. You need to listen, because she’s not asking you to fix everything. She’s asking you to be there."

Carlos closed his eyes, the weight of his father’s words settling over him like a heavy blanket. He had been so caught up in his own fears, his own insecurities, that he hadn’t even considered what you must have been feeling. He hadn’t thought about the fact that you were in this together, that this wasn’t just his problem to solve. It was yours—yours to face, to share, to overcome.

"She’s scared, Carlos," his father continued. "She’s scared, and she needs you. Not the man who thinks he has all the answers, but the man who’s willing to show up, even when he doesn’t. She needs you to be there, to support her through this. That’s what it means to be a man. To stand by the people you love, even when it’s hard. Even when you don’t know how."

Carlos Sr. turned around to face him, his eyes meeting his son’s with a quiet intensity.

"You have a choice, Carlos. You can choose to run, to stay in the safety of the life you’ve built for yourself. Or you can choose to be a father, to take responsibility for the life you’re creating. The choice is yours. But don’t wait too long to make it. Because sometimes, the biggest mistake we can make is not realizing what we have until it’s too late."

Carlos sat in silence, the weight of his father’s words sinking deep into his soul. For the first time since he had walked out of your apartment, he felt a shift inside him—a slow, dawning realization that he could no longer keep running from this.

He had to go back. He had to face you.

Carlos’ heart raced as he drove back toward the apartment. His father’s words had cut deeper than he expected, like a scalpel carving into something raw, something fragile. The weight of his choices pressed heavily on his chest. The fear, the uncertainty—it was all still there, but his father’s wisdom had ignited something inside him, a spark of understanding he had been too afraid to acknowledge before.

He had left. Walked away when you needed him the most. And now he had to fix it. He had to go back and be the man he promised he would be—someone you could depend on, someone who would fight for you. But more than that, someone who would fight for the life growing inside of you.

Carlos gripped the steering wheel tighter, his knuckles white with the effort. He couldn’t shake the images of your face—the hurt in your eyes, the way you had begged him to understand. And he hadn’t. He had run.

When he pulled into the parking lot of your building, everything seemed so still. The world outside was unaware of the storm that had been brewing between the two of you, but it felt like the universe itself was holding its breath. He parked the car with a sense of finality, as if this moment would mark the beginning of something new—or the end of everything.

He got out of the car, walking toward the entrance with slow, deliberate steps. His mind raced with a thousand things to say, but none of them seemed to be enough. What could he possibly say to fix this? How could he explain the confusion, the fear, the selfishness that had led him to walk away from you when you needed him most?

The door to the apartment creaked open with a quiet sound that felt impossibly loud in the silence of the hallway. Carlos stepped inside, his eyes scanning the room, searching for you. But the apartment was eerily quiet. He called your name softly at first, unsure if you were even home, but the emptiness in the air told him something was wrong.

"Y/N?" His voice trembled slightly as he stepped further into the apartment. "Are you here?"

There was no answer.

He walked through the living room and into the bedroom, the door slightly ajar. As he pushed it open, the sight that met him took the breath from his lungs.

You were lying on the bed, unmoving. The room was dim, the curtains pulled tightly shut to block out the light. But what caught his attention wasn’t the stillness—it was the absence of the warmth that had once filled this space. The energy that had defined your relationship was gone, replaced with a cold, suffocating silence. You weren’t sleeping. You weren’t pretending everything was okay.

Your face was pale, your eyes closed, but your expression... it wasn’t peaceful. It was hollow, distant, as if you had already begun to retreat into a place where Carlos could no longer reach you.

His breath caught in his throat as he approached the bed, his heart hammering in his chest.

"Y/N?" he said again, his voice breaking this time. "Please, look at me."

You didn’t stir. His heart twisted in his chest, a feeling of dread settling deep in his bones. There was something in the air—a heaviness that he couldn’t shake. Slowly, cautiously, Carlos sat on the edge of the bed, reaching out to touch your hand. It was cold, lifeless, a stark contrast to the warmth he had once known so well.

"Y/N, what’s going on?" he whispered, his voice full of pain and regret. He could feel the tears threatening to spill, but he held them back, not knowing if he even deserved the release.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, you opened your eyes, though they seemed distant—no longer the eyes that had once been full of life and love. You looked at him, but it was as if you were seeing someone else entirely. Someone he didn’t recognize.

"Y/N, please," Carlos whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "I’m so sorry. I was scared. I didn’t know what to do. But I’m here now. I’m here. I’ll do whatever it takes."

You blinked, your lips parting to speak, but the words never came. Instead, there was only the faintest trace of something in your eyes. Something he couldn’t quite place. Was it anger? Was it sorrow? Or something deeper—something he had failed to see in his own selfishness?

"Y/N," Carlos said again, his voice cracking this time. "Please... talk to me."

But still, you didn’t respond.

It was then that Carlos noticed something else. There, on the bed, beside you, was the faint trace of something—a small stain, barely noticeable, but undeniable. A knot formed in his stomach, and his hands began to tremble as realization began to sink in. His breath hitched, and his throat felt tight as he turned back to you, finally understanding.

"No," he breathed, his voice shaking. "No, please."

Your eyes fluttered slightly, and for a moment, Carlos thought you were going to speak. But then your gaze drifted downward, to the small band of blood that had soaked through the sheets. It was then that he realized—the child, the life that had been growing inside you, was no longer there.

"You lost it," Carlos whispered, the words coming out barely louder than a breath. His heart shattered at the realization, and a wave of guilt washed over him so strong he could hardly breathe. He had walked away. He had been so focused on his own fears, his own uncertainties, that he hadn’t seen the weight of what was happening to you.

He reached for your hand again, but this time, you pulled away. You looked at him then, and it wasn’t anger or sorrow in your eyes—it was something far worse.

"You don’t get to come back now," you said, your voice quiet, but firm. "You left when I needed you the most, Carlos. You can’t just come back and pretend everything will be okay."

Carlos felt as though the air had been knocked from his lungs. He had no words to respond to that. How could he? How could he explain that the fear of fatherhood had been so overwhelming that he had allowed it to dictate his actions, even if it meant losing you—losing everything?

"You’re right," he said finally, his voice thick with emotion. "I don’t get to just come back. But I’m here now, and I’m not going anywhere. I don��t care what it takes. I’ll be here for you—for us. I should’ve been here before, and I’m so sorry that I wasn’t."

But your eyes were still distant, and Carlos knew that the damage had been done. The distance between you had grown too wide, too deep to bridge in a single moment.

"I can’t do this anymore," you whispered. "I can’t keep waiting for you to figure out what you want. I can’t keep fighting for something that you’re not ready for. I thought I could do it on my own, but now... now I don’t even know who I am anymore."

Carlos felt his heart break in ways he didn’t even know were possible. The weight of what he had lost hit him with the force of a wrecking ball. You weren’t just angry with him. You were hurt. You had been betrayed, and the loss of the child—their future—was something he could never undo.

"I’ll stay with you," Carlos said quietly, his voice breaking. "I don’t care if we’re too late. We’ll figure it out. I’m here now. But please, don’t shut me out. Please."

You closed your eyes, tears sliding down your face. "It’s too late, Carlos."

And just like that, the silence between you two became unbearable, suffocating. It wasn’t just the loss of the child. It was the loss of everything that had once been. The future you had dreamed of together. The family. The love. All of it seemed to have vanished, leaving only a hollow ache where something beautiful had once been.

Carlos didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know how to fix this, how to make it right. All he knew was that he had failed. He had failed you, and in doing so, he had failed himself.

Carlos sat at the edge of the bed, staring at the empty space beside him. His body felt numb, as though every part of him had been drained of energy, of life, of everything he thought he knew about the world. He had come back, had finally understood what he needed to do, but it had been too late.

He could still hear your words echoing in his mind, the quiet but firm dismissal that had shattered the fragile hope he had clung to. "I can’t keep waiting for you to figure out what you want," you had said, your voice filled with something far more painful than anger. It had been sorrow, the kind of sorrow that ran deeper than any argument, deeper than any misunderstanding. It had been the kind of sorrow that came from realizing that love, no matter how much you wanted it to, couldn’t heal everything.

The child was gone. You had lost it. The pregnancy was no longer a promise, no longer the future you had thought you were building together. And now, there was only silence.

Carlos closed his eyes, trying to push away the overwhelming weight that pressed on his chest. He had failed you, failed the life that had barely begun, and failed himself. He had walked away when he should have been there, when he should have listened instead of running. He had been afraid, too afraid to face the responsibility that was already his—one that could have been a gift if he had only chosen to embrace it. But now, it was too late.

The apartment felt suffocating. The walls seemed to close in around him as he stood up from the bed, pacing aimlessly across the room. His mind was a whirlwind of thoughts, each one more agonizing than the last. He couldn’t undo the past, couldn’t take back the moments he had spent trying to avoid the reality of what had been unfolding right in front of him. The child, the future, the love—it was all gone.

Carlos ran a hand through his hair, trying to calm the storm inside him. He had been so focused on himself, on his own fears, on his own insecurities, that he hadn’t seen what was right in front of him. He hadn’t realized that the most important thing in his life wasn’t his career or his accomplishments. It was you. And he had lost you.

The thought hit him like a physical blow, a punch to the gut that left him breathless. He had lost you, and in doing so, he had lost everything that had ever truly mattered.

A soft knock on the door broke through the haze of his thoughts, and for a moment, Carlos didn’t know if he should answer. He didn’t know if he was ready to face anyone, especially after everything that had happened. But then, he heard his father’s voice on the other side of the door.

"Carlos? It’s me."

Carlos felt his stomach tighten at the sound of his father’s voice. He hadn’t even noticed that his father had followed him back to the apartment. It was a small mercy, one that Carlos hadn’t even realized he needed, but now, standing at the door, he knew it was the only thing that could help him navigate the overwhelming pain and regret.

"Come in," Carlos said, his voice rough.

The door creaked open, and Carlos’ father stepped inside. His presence was calming, steady, like a rock amidst a storm. Carlos didn’t look up at first, too consumed by his own guilt, but he felt the weight of his father’s gaze upon him, steady and unwavering.

Carlos Sr. said nothing at first, just walked over to the small couch in the corner and sat down. He folded his hands in his lap and waited. It was a silence that spoke volumes, one that gave Carlos the space he needed to gather his thoughts, even as they remained tangled and chaotic.

Finally, Carlos spoke, his voice barely more than a whisper. "I failed her, Papa."

Carlos Sr. didn’t respond immediately, but the quiet understanding in his eyes told Carlos that his father already knew the depth of his pain. After a long pause, Carlos Sr. finally spoke.

"Hijo, you didn’t fail her," he said quietly. "You failed yourself. And in doing so, you failed to see what was right in front of you."

Carlos swallowed hard, the lump in his throat growing bigger with each word his father spoke. He had failed himself, that much was true. His own fear, his own inability to face the future had clouded his judgment, clouded everything. And now, all he had left was this empty apartment, the silence between them, and the memory of a life that was never meant to be.

"I didn’t want this," Carlos said, his voice raw with emotion. "I wasn’t ready. I thought I could keep going, keep doing what I was doing. I thought if I just kept pushing everything away, it would go away. But it didn’t. And now… now she’s gone."

Carlos Sr. leaned forward, his gaze steady, but his voice gentle. "She’s not gone, Carlos. She’s hurt. She’s disappointed, yes. But she’s not gone. Not unless you let her be."

Carlos let out a bitter laugh, the sound bitter and hollow. "I let her down, Papa. I walked away when she needed me most. I couldn’t handle it. I couldn’t—"

"Stop," Carlos Sr. interrupted, his voice firm but not unkind. "You’re wrong. You couldn’t handle it because you didn’t let yourself. You were so caught up in your own fear that you couldn’t see what was really happening. And now, you have to fix that. You have to go to her, Carlos. You have to show her that you can be the man she needs you to be."

Carlos’s heart pounded in his chest. His father’s words were like a call to action, but he didn’t know if he could follow through. Could he really fix this? Could he undo the damage he had done? Was it even possible?

"I don’t know if she’ll forgive me," Carlos said, his voice thick with emotion. "I don’t know if I deserve it."

"You don’t deserve forgiveness, Carlos," his father said quietly. "But you can earn it. And you start by showing up. You start by being there, by taking responsibility for what you did. It’s not about what you deserve—it’s about what you’re willing to do to make things right."

Carlos’s father stood up and placed a hand on his shoulder, the weight of it grounding him in that moment.

"You’re going to make mistakes, son," Carlos Sr. continued. "You’re going to mess up. But the measure of a man is not in his ability to avoid mistakes—it’s in how he handles them when they happen. It’s about owning up to them, learning from them, and doing everything in his power to make things better. That’s how you move forward. That’s how you become the man you’re meant to be."

Carlos felt tears well up in his eyes, a mix of relief and sorrow that he hadn’t expected. His father’s words, simple yet profound, broke through the fog of his confusion, and for the first time in what felt like forever, Carlos felt the smallest glimmer of hope.

"Go to her," Carlos Sr. said quietly, giving his son a final, meaningful look. "You’re not alone in this. But you can’t fix it by running away."

Carlos nodded, his throat tight. He wasn’t sure if he was ready. He wasn’t sure if you would even want to see him after everything that had happened. But he knew one thing for certain: he couldn’t stay here, wallowing in his own regret. He had to go to you. He had to show you that he could be the man you needed, that he could be the father he had never thought he could be.

He stood up, his legs shaky beneath him, and walked toward the door. His father’s voice echoed in his mind, steady and unwavering. He wasn’t alone in this. He had to believe that.

As he stepped outside, the cool air hit him like a slap to the face, but it didn’t matter. He was moving forward now. He wasn’t going to let fear control him anymore.

He was going to fight for you.

And this time, he wasn’t going to run.

#carlos sainz imagine #carlos sainz x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 x reader #carlos sainz #carlos sainz x female reader #carlos sainz x y/n #carlos sainz x you #f1

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hxney-lemcn · 3 days ago

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Alive, Dreaming — Daisuke x gn! reader

summery: reuniting with Daisuke when he comes back.

tw: none.

a/n: a gift for enduring all that angst I threw at you :) (title is a song, not a song fic tho)

wc: 0.4k

Master List

You paced the living room excitedly, eyes constantly glancing between your watch and the front door. You were already grinning maniacally, making sure all the decorations were set in place perfectly. Daisuke was going to be here any second now, and you needed this small party to go off with a bang. You had invited a few of the people Daisuke used to hang out with at parties, but when you mentioned this party wasn’t gonna have alcohol or loud music they made excuses as to why they couldn’t show. Whatever, they were probably a bunch of jerks anyways.

Your heart spiked when you heard footsteps outside of the door, Daisuke and his moms voice muffled through the door. You were basically jumping off the walls when you heard the keys jingling to open the door, hands shaking as you held the small confetti popper. The second the door opened you couldn’t hold yourself back, pulling the string sending confetti towards your long time friend and boyfriend.

“Surprise~!” You shouted, hopping up and down on the balls of your feet, your party hat hanging on for dear life.

Daisuke stared at the scene in surprise before the biggest grin you’ve ever seen tugged at his lips, shouting your name excitedly before swooping you up into a hug. You both squeezed each other like your lives depended on it, taking in the other's presence after being deprived of it for over a year.

“God I missed you,” Daisuke whispered, burying his face into your shoulder. His mother shuffled past, sending the two of you a soft smile before heading to the kitchen to get the cake out.

“I missed you too,” You murmured back, rocking both of you back and forth gently. Pulling away slightly, you grinned as Daisuke pouted at you. Not giving him a chance to whine, you pulled him in for a short kiss, letting your love and longing linger on his lips as you pulled away. Much to your dismay (not) Daisuke chased after you, not letting you get away and pressing another kiss to your lips. This one slightly deeper with more conviction.

“Who wants cake?” Daisuke’s mother called out, not needing to leave the kitchen to know you both were having a moment.

Grinning at the two-toned haired man you held in your arms, you untangled your limbs, interlocking your fingers and pulling him with you towards the kitchen. Daisuke couldn’t be happier to be back home with you and his family. He couldn’t be more grateful that Pony Express was shut down now, that he wouldn’t have to do that again. Sure, he met some great people, and they definitely changed his life (for better and worse), but he wasn’t made for the stars.

Sure, he was still uncertain what his future held for him, but he did know one thing. He didn’t want to live a future without you by his side.

#mouthwashing x reader #daisuke mouthwashing x reader #daisuke x reader #mouthwashing daisuke x reader #mouthwashing #daisuke mouthwashing #mouthwashing daisuke #daisuke #x reader

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dlwritings · 3 days ago

Text

November 6, 2024 | Rafe Cameron

masterlist found here

pairing - Rafe x reader word count - 1,827 warnings - political talk, anti-T*ump rhetoric A/N - Who would've thought the shit show state of our world would inspire me to write again. I know for a lot of us everything feels really broken right now, and I know it may seem silly to some, but for me, writing feels like healing, even if it's just something like this. So here you all are. Rafe probably votes red, but here's a world where he doesn't. Also, if you're a T*umper, go ahead and unfollow me. I can't have any of that in my life. I'm so serious.

summary - The results of the 2024 election hit you pretty hard, and you end up taking your rage out on Rafe. Turns out, Rafe's hopes for the future looked a lot like yours.

You and Rafe didn’t talk about politics. You knew better than to broach the topic with him, because you weren’t naive. One glance at him and anyone could guess how he voted.

But that didn’t mean you had to like it.

The two of you had been dating for about six months, and for the most part, it was smooth sailing. It was gossip fuel for most people on the island for a few weeks -you being a pogue and Rafe being … who he was- but like most drama in Kildaire, it didn’t stay at the forefront of people’s minds for long before another thing came and stole back everyone’s attention.

And the thing on everyone’s mind right now was the election. The election that had you donned in blue on your way to the polls, a huge smile on your face as you filled in the bubble that would make history. Hope filled you in a way you were sure it never had before.

Until the next day.

Waking up and opening social media to see the results had already come in was enough to break your spirit completely. How could this have happened? How could the country have failed so many people?

Then again, how had you been so naive to believe in the possibility of any other outcome?

You shut yourself off from the world for most of the day. You went to work and gave polite smiles and nods to your coworkers as needed, but you did your best to spend the majority of your time locked in your office, alone. You didn’t dare to open social media, knowing every MAGA post from the bigots of the Figure 8 would bring tears to your eyes.

It wasn’t until you were at home on your couch that you decided to brave Instagram. Before scrolling through your feed, you added a black screen with a simple blue heart to your story and wrote the words, When we fight, we win.

You thought it was harmless. A simple story that showed your feelings without being overly dramatic. The last thing you wanted to do was act irrational by doing something crazy like storming the capitol. Because that would just be insane.

Unfortunately, the people who followed you saw it as anything but harmless. They saw it as an opening to send you the most heinous, revolting messages you had ever read. Your notifications blew up within minutes, and some of them were so borderline terrifying that you locked your phone and threw it across the room, once again leaving you in a puddle of tears.

You heard your front door open, and you cursed to yourself. In all the chaos of the news, it escaped your mind that it was Wednesday, and Rafe always brought pizza to your apartment on Wednesdays. You had once mentioned in passing that you liked a pick-me-up halfway through a week, and Rafe took it upon himself to provide you with that. Normally, it was one of your favorite parts of the week. Today, Rafe was one of the last people you wanted to see.

“Babe!” he called out upon his entrance. “I got your favorite!”

You met him in the kitchen, and by one look at your face, Rafe’s own expression dropped. “What’s going on?”

You swallowed back the lump in your throat. “I think you should go.”

“What?” he said, dropping the pizza on the counter and walking over to you. With each step he took toward you, you took one step back. He stopped quickly, a frown painted on his face. “What’s wrong, baby?”

The words made something snap inside you, and your fists clenched at your sides. “What’s wrong?” you repeated. “What’s wrong? How about fucking everything, Rafe! Everything’s wrong, and you not seeing that is part of the problem! You are part of the problem!”

Rafe was, in a word, flabbergasted. He ran through the past 24 hours, trying to think of something he had done wrong, but he was coming up short. “Okay, I’m-” He let out an exasperated laugh. “I’m trying to understand, but you’ve got to give me something more here. What did I do?”

“You-” You let out a huff of a breath and ended up speaking through gritted teeth. “You and your stupid fucking MAGA Kook friends voted for a convicted felon to run our country! You voted for a man who wants to throw away my rights. You voted for a man who has raped a multitude of women and brags about it!”

Rafe’s eyes were wide as he held his hands up and shook his head. “Hang on-”

“No, Rafe!” you shouted, pushing him back as he tried to get closer to you again. “For the entire time we’ve dated, I’ve danced around the talk of politics, because I knew better. I knew a rich ass white guy from the south would vote for another rich ass white guy to run our country, but I guess I naively thought it wouldn’t matter. That the poor guys would get a win for fucking once this time. For once I thought the good guys would win and that a white man would have to face the consequences of his actions. But you-” You laughed bitterly. “You of all people know that privileged ass white men never ever have to face the consequences of their actions.”

You were hitting him where it hurt, and you knew it, but you were hurt. You and every woman like you had been holding in years of pain and hurt, and for you and many others, today was the day it was all going to come out.

“Baby, if you just let me-”

“Let you?” you laughed incredulously. “You and your fellow MAGA guys have clearly shown me I don’t have to let you do anything anymore.”

“What does that mean?” he asked.

You fished your phone out of your pocket, unlocked it, and shoved it in his face to show him all of the nasty messages you were receiving. Things like, “Your body, my choice,” “whomp whomp go make me a sandwich,” and “Guess what? Men win again” had flooded your DMs, and while you didn’t know it, Rafe was clocking every username and making a very specific list in his head.

“So maybe you can understand why I’m angry, Rafe,” you said, taking the phone back out of his hand and putting it in your pocket again. “I thought I could cancel out your vote, but I guess I forgot that meant you could cancel mine.”

“Ba-”

“I want you to leave, Rafe.”

“But I didn’t-”

“Fucking, go, Rafe!” you shouted. “Let me be angry and let me be alone!”

With a clenched jaw, Rafe gave a short nod. “Okay,” he whispered. “Fine.” It looked like he wanted to say more, but he refrained, instead turning around and heading out the door, leaving you in a mess of tears.

The next day, you called off from work. Maybe it was dramatic, but you didn’t care. You knew if one person even looked at you in a way you didn’t like, you’d lose any composure you had, and you couldn’t afford to lose your job for yelling at your boss.

You had the full intention to stay in bed all day, but the relentless knock at your door around 10AM proved that to be impossible. You felt some sense of relief, knowing it at least wouldn’t be another political petitioner.

Instead, perhaps just as unfortunately, it was Rafe.

You let out a heavy sigh. “What do you want, Rafe?”

He held out his hand which had a coffee cup in it from your favorite shop. “I went to your work, but your boss said you were sick,” he said. “I bought you coffee.” You took it, but didn’t say anything -just looked at him with raised eyebrows, as if to say, Anything else? “Can we please talk?” he said.

“I don’t know what there is to say, Rafe,” you sighed. Still, you stepped aside and let him in, not wanting your neighbors to bear witness to whatever argument was about to ensue. “I know we’re different -I’ve always known that- but I don’t think I can handle being this kind of different anymore.” You plopped yourself onto the sofa, expecting Rafe to sit next to you. Instead, he crouched in front of you so he was just slightly looking up at you.

“Baby, I didn’t vote for him.”

Your lips parted slightly in shock, and you felt tears instantly pool in your eyes.

“What?” you whispered.

“Yeah, of course I didn’t vote for him,” he said. He reached up to turn around the hat he was wearing backwards to reveal a Harris-Walz cap, and you let out a noise that was a mix of a gasp and a little laugh. “I know I’ve fucked up before baby,” he said. “And in other elections, yeah, I usually vote red. But this-” He shook his head and squeezed your knees. “This is different. And I know that. And I’d be an absolute moron to think that tax cuts for me are more important than basic rights for you.”

You moved to kneel on the floor next to him and held his face in your hands before leaning forward to place a soft kiss to his lips. When you pulled back, you kept your forehead against his. “I was so mean to you yesterday,” you whispered. “I didn’t-”

“It wasn’t anything I didn’t deserve,” he said. “I know that I am living in a world that was pretty much tailor made for me. And I know I should be in fucking prison for all the shit I’ve done, and so should he. And I know that none of what I’m saying right now changes the bullshit I’ve done, but I figured I should at least use all this fucking privilege I have and try to help people who don’t have it. Because you-” He paused to press a kiss to your lips. “-have taught me so much about being a good person. And I’m not going to vote against that.”

“I wasn’t a good person yesterday,” you mumbled.

“You were reacting to an unfortunately historic event,” he said. “You had every right to lose it. And you can keep losing it, and I will be by your side for every minute of it, okay?”

You nodded and gave him a soft smile. “Okay.”

He smiled back and nodded. “Okay.”

You and Rafe decided to spend the rest of the day together, sometimes talking, sometimes just sitting in the quiet. When you suggested putting on a movie, Rafe agreed. He let you choose, no complaints, and watched as you searched for the Barbie movie. You cried at all the usual parts, sometimes a bit harder than normal, but Rafe understood.

It is literally impossible to be a woman.

----- ----- ----- -----

add yourself to my TAGLIST

strike-through means Tumblr won’t let me tag you

If you want to be taken off the list (or be put on for only certain people) just message me and let me know!

ALL:

@bangtan-serendipity

@planetdemon

@the-singing-clown406

@tomshufflepuff

@bluelalal

@grandloser

@jackiehollanderr

@mindset-jupiter

@bisexual-sk8r

@feel-like-gold

@runaway-apple

@miraclesoflove

@marvelismylifffe

@wonderbyers

@coraz0ndcristal

@lizmarvel

@delicately-important-trash

@superhoorny4daddy

@misshale21

@mrsjna

@daisydark

Rafe Cameron:

@starkeybae

@drakestoes

@ethanthequeefqueen

@r1vrsefx

@angelsplnet

@alltomay

@immelissaaa

@tahliac11

@bibliophilewednesday

#rafe cameron #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron x reader #outer banks #outer banks imagine #this is so niche but I really needed it #and idk maybe someone else does too

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rpgchoices · 2 days ago

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About Davrin and his past (from the banter with Bellara) and more (SPOILERS)

Spoilers for the whole game!!

Davrin being the kind of person who believes he has an expiration death and should not get attached, only flirting and having flings, quick to start the flirting romance (one flirting choice and he already has the heart in the description)

"Thrill of the chase"

who calls himself a blade and believes he is ready to die at any moment and desperate for purpose

The way Davrin comes off is isolated, with purpose, slightly suicidal and harsh. In the banter with Bellara she asks a lot of questions about his Dalish clan (which he left because he felt constrained) and if he regrets leaving it:

and

(I promise I will make a compilation video of all the dalish banter)

So the core of Davrin's character is purpose and he chose the hunter + grey warden because of it. This banter feels quite lonely, if I have to be honest, and in another banter scene he also says (if I remember correctly) that he does not visit his dalish clan (a part from his uncle). It almost feels like a sunk-cost-fallacy. From his first quest we know that he left his clan, ended up broke and could not go back so he started hunting monsters but he needed purpose.

The second core of Davrin's storyline is that sometimes when he talks about Assan he is talking about himself. Assan is, in his mind, a sharped blade (arrow) who needs to quickly learn how to fight to survive (and in some cutscenes Davrin brings as justification the fact that this is how he learnt as well, on his own and out of necessity). So the whole dialogue about "can the nature of something change" is essentially about him as well.

It starts to change with Assan of course, we see him actually get attached to ONE thing for the first time ever. How do we know? First of all, he did not seem particularly attached to the two trainers, but second, he also says so in his romance dialogue:

And when Davrin is about to die (archdemon) the one thing he thinks about is Assan ("Give Assan a hug for me"). So yes, "The thril of the chase" was just that. He was flirting, he wanted to keep things casual and then "his nature" (or more like: the nature related to the purpose he had given himself) started to change.

His character arc goes from a sharpened blade with no attachment and eager to die for a bigger purpose, to someone who does not want to die anymore, who literally wants domestic bliss.

Which is even more tragic because he is one of the two characters who can die (and will die depending on your choices), which lead you to this scene where he says:

Also I am pretty sure all the other romances say "I love you" during the game (I think Emmrich during his personal quest), or during the romance scene pre-final fight. Let me know if I am wrong! Davrin's "I love you" scene instead is the literal last scene before the final battle (the one after you rescue Neve/Bellara).

Davrin's last cutscene pre-fight instead is pretty explicit (i think the most explicit one after Taash) and is mainly a reassurance about surviving the battle and the future.

So YES I love Davrin. Great romance, A+, wish it had more scenes in the middle, wish we knew more about his Dalish clan, but at least there is enough space between the lines and work on fanfics!!

#davrin #i have many davrin feelings #assan #dragon age #veilguard spoilers #veilguard #best romance in the game imho #da

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gem-de-lune · 2 days ago

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Daily Vibe Check 11/9

It really really paid off to give the other members a breather from vibe checks. They were very transparent and open today compared to usual!

As i mentioned before, the vibe checks for individual members will be briefer than usual unless it's something significant.

Enjoy!

Seunghan

Ace of Chalices

He's feeling generally well. There is a lot of emotional creative energy being fulfilled after a time of things being much more dry. In other words, he is feeling emotionally fulfilled and refreshed.

Eunseok

The Chariot

He is feeling generally well. Maybe very collaborative, healthy, and ambitious. This is that 7 card again which could indicate a certain sentiment of comradery making him feel this way. He may be working out lately or just very active.

Sohee

9 of Wands

He is feeling generally well. He is also feeling ambitious and active. Maybe in a more laid back way though. He is still really focused on his taks at the moment but putting pieces in place for the future he wishes to protect. So in general, he is just working and staying chill.

Shotaro

5 of Chalices

So generally he is feeling immature today? That's the vibe. I pulled another card for myself to clarify this and pulled the Devil. There are more layers to that I will discuss later. But generally, Taro seems to be stuck in a more negative mindset right now. I think he is very suseptible to this which is why a lot of times he will come off as unserious or sarcastic- or fall off the face of the earth to decompress and return to normal. Right now, I think he has shut down physically, emotionally, maybe even mentally due to his anxieties. However with this card it is clear it is a bit of an overreaction due to his impatience and uncertainties he is annoyed over. He may be very lazy and not willing to put in a lot of effort right now.

Anton

The Devil

Yup this is the extra layer we are adding. The fact that I have pulled this for him tells me one of two things. Either A- they duked it out, or B- Anton is the one mainly handling or wmpathizing with Taro right now. He may feel a bit suffocated by these feelings but he fully understands and validates Taro. Generally, he is feeling OK, but more so influenced by the bad feelings of Shotaro and trying to not sink into the same realm of negativity. I pulled the Empress after this so they will be fine in the end. Just a little phase here.

Wonbin

6 of Wands

He is generally feeling good. He may be starting a routine of sorts. He feels good about things in terms of the direction they are heading in, so he is putting a lot of physical effort in. He may be doing a lot of creative physical activities like dancing lately.

Sungchan

King of Swords

He is feeling generally well but closer to neutral. There are no super strong emotions. More than that, he is likely feeling very communicative and collaborative. He is focused on some sort of results or rather he wants or DEMANDS to have some results to a certain standard for him to be satisfied at the moment. He is more focused on this than anything.

How is SM feelings about bringing Seunghan Back?

Strength + 10 of Pentacles

Very good omen. The 10 of pentacles is about permanence. If they are feeling this way about the matter then they may be considering it seriously at the very least. But personally I believe they have already made a decision of sorts. With the Strength card as well this suggests that the conclusion will be reached victoriously after a lot of enduring and perseverance.

Bottom of my deck:

3 of Wands

I am going to start reading the bottom of the deck card so we can read the general energy surrounding the entire situation. Currently it is the 3 of Wands. This is about confidence and planning to me. In regards to this situation, and this is something I wanted to put in ending notes too: EVERYONE is working together to make sure that bringing Seunghan back is not only a reality, but a safe and loving reality for him. Mostly everyone is moving forwards with this sentiment, but being patient as we work is also extrmely important.

Final Notes:

For remaining notes, I will be sharing a reply to an ask post on my Tumblr, which I think sums up a lot of what we need to be doing. If you haven't seen it already, read it here: 🩵

#astrology #kpop #tarot #riize is 7 #riize is seven #smsupportsbullying #riize #seunghan #anton #eunseok #sungchan #shotaro #sohee #wonbin #bring back seunghan

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eatanorange · 1 day ago

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marauders do the candy trauma salad trend since I JUST saw a fantastic one for pjo (highly encourage y'all to add your versions/to this pls I don't have solid hcs of everyone) (evan's is fully me projecting btw)(a lot of them are me projecting <3).

Upon completion I want to add up here n not just the tags that these do reference various traumas/bigotry so be careful and mind what headspace ur in n all that pls take care of urselves k thanks love u.

Sirius: Hi I'm sirius and every time my mother considered something I did 'impure', like experience joy or get sorted in to gryffindor, she took my mouth away! *momentary zone out from the horrors* I brought milk duds!

Barty: bazooka bubblegum. *vid cuts* I'm barty and I hate my dad for all of the reasons you can imagine and I think it would be fun if he blew up. good?

Lily: Hi I'm Lily and after I got sent to magic school, all emotional ties with my muggle sister, who regards me as a freak, and my mother, who was more sensitive to her side, were severed. They didn't tell me when my dad died. I brought 3 musketeers.

Remus: Hi I'm remus and I got bit by a werewolf when I was 5, then my dad offed himself because of it. I brought moon pies.

James: Hi I'm James and I fell into limerence with someone and incessantly pursued them for over a year in ways that were detrimental to both of our mental states. I was so public about it I don't even need to say who it was. My mother sat me down one day and said "was it something your father and I did, something we said, that convinced you you need to beg someone to love you? to let you show them love?" and that broke something in me. We're chill now though, and I have coping techniques that work for me while still allowing me to be my expressive self, so I brought mr. goodbars.

Peter: Hi I'm peter and my animagus is literally a rat. I brought sour patch kids.

Dorcas: Hi I'm dorcas and my pureblood parents will never say it to my face but they wanted me to be a boy. To compensate I was sure to always get top marks, be well liked, and experience gender dysphoria. I burnt out before our 5th year, and learning radical acceptance in the place of trying to guess unspoken rules saved my life. I brought smarties.

Regulus: Hi I'm regulus and in order to be sure my mother didn't assassinate my brother for running away, I stayed behind in the abusive household and eventually became a deatheater to keep my cover, hunting down one bald headed bitch's horcruxes until it literally almost killed me. I think it did kill me in some lives. and I brought the starburst.

Mary: Hi I'm Mary and due to blood supremacist bigots, I have to go to school with people who want me to die just for having the audacity to exist. The muggle world is also like this. The school I go to does not matter in this scenario. I brought mentos for the salad and a bottle of soda for the show.

Evan: Hi I'm evan and my ex went on holiday to another country for 3 months, told me we could write to stay connected, they didn't, broke up with me via owl while still on said vacation, and then came to talk to me in person about that, denied that it was an active choice to disconnect from me, then tried to put the onus of any friendship to follow on just me. We haven't spoken since. Also I'm a sex positive, but also trauma affected ace, it was an open relationship, and they somehow still managed to be shady/inconsiderate about hooking up with someone on the vacation. I brought blow pops.

Pandora: Hi I'm pandora and sometimes I get prophetic dreams so vivid I can't tell when I wake up. Sometimes, though the future is not stagnant, I see my friends die :) I brought airheads.

Marlene: Hi I'm marlene and I have 5 brothers. 3 of them accept my nonbinary identity. The rest, and my parents, blatantly ignore that I use they/them pronouns. Then they told me if I don't have children as an adult I won't be worth visiting because it's my job as a pureblood to produce an heir. So I went to St. Mungos and got sterilized. I brought baby ruth candy.

Hope you enjoy! and thanks if you read them all! This was fun for me.

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thelov3lybookworm · 3 days ago

Text

I Am Forever Yours (part 3)

Day 6: Reputation

Summary: They assumed.

•○●⛦●○•

Word Count: 1092

Warnings: snobby, jealous ladies trynna bully yn but yn is a badass 😏, i think kinda oc lucien cus he hasnt fucked around at all heheheeheheheheh

A/n: look i just find people who wait till marriage to have intimate relations to be adorable and neat 🥹

(its me im neat and my future husband better be too 🤭)

edit: if you saw me edit the last line to add in a dialogue no u didnt 😇

@lucienweekofficial

ANYWAY ENJOYYYY 🥳

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

Y/n knew there were quite a few ladies who would kill to be in her place. After all, becoming the bride of one of the princes was no small matter. Especially when said prince was the most charming gentleman the kingdom had ever seen.

Royal and elite families, even from neighbouring kingdoms, as well as more potential brides had all been invited to the wedding. And where there was a wedding, there was a gathering of the ladies. And where there were ladies gathered, there were rumours spreading.

And Y/n found herself in such a setting the night before her wedding, and the topic of discussion, unfortunately, was her husband.

"Did you know he lives amongst the poor?"

"I cannot fathom why he would do that."

"Does he not get to spend like his brothers?"

"Poor him. I heard he might be a bastard child, and that is why he’s always left out of things."

Y/n heaved a frustrated sigh. From the past hour, she had been sitting here courtesy of her mother’s scoldings on propriety and etiquette, and if she left in the middle of the tea party after dinner it would be disrespectful. That the ladies would think marrying a prince got to her head and she thinks them beneath her.

One of the younger ladies’s giggles caught Y/n’s attention, and she turned to look at what was so funny.

"You know, there are rumours that he has fire in his veins."

High pitched giggles followed that statement, and Y/n’s cheeks burned from the implications in that statement.

Am I being too dirty minded?

But the next second, her worries were blown away by the words of an entirely too smug lady who sat closer to Y/n. "Oh, believe me, he does."

The others in their little group gasped, beginning to hound her for information.

"Did you have him in your bed?"

Y/n clenched her jaw just imagining such an erotic scene, pulse spiking.

"Oh no, I am not so fortunate. But I have surely dreamed about it and heard from others."

It gave Y/n little peace knowing that even though he might not have slept with others, people drooled over him still. She wanted to chide herself for having such thoughts, considering she had only met Lucien at that ball a month ago and was not even married yet.

But not for long, she reminded herself. The wedding would be tomorrow, and then she would have all rights to be possessive over him.

"Lady Oak, you are far too lucky. How did you even get him to agree to your proposal?"

Y/n blinked, meeting the eyes of the lady who grinned at her fiendishly. Her eyes narrowed.

Her name must be husband stealer or something.

She snorted at her own thoughts when another lady who looked younger than her piped up.

"Is it because your father is the advisor and the king forced him?"

Y/n fisted her hand, smiling sweetly. "Oh no, quite the opposite actually."

Husband-stealer laughed. "Oh, so prince Lucien asked your father for your hand? Can’t be, for he has been known to reject proposals left and right."

"Oh, did he reject your proposal too?"

Y/n leaned back in her cushioned chair, innocently gazing at husband-stealer as colour darkened her face, anger evident in every part of her body.

"That does not matter. He does not seem the type to stay with one partner forever anyways."

"You do not have to worry about his betrayals for you are not the one going to be affected by it."

Husband-stealer stood abruptly, glaring at Y/n for a moment before announcing she was going to retire to her room to her companions who did not bother to wish her back and focused on Y/n.

Another win, Y/n thought with a smirk.

"When did you meet him?"

"Last month during the ball he approached me, and when I told him to basically leave me alone, he asked for my hand in marriage. My father said yes."

"And you had no problem?"

Y/n’s smile turned genuine thinking about Lucien stalking up to her father and talking to him with his usual charm. She remembered very vividly how her father’s eyes had widened and he had stuttered through a response, his lips spreading in a grin.

"No. I had only seen him that day and I knew he would be the best suitor. Moreover, I trusted my father’s judgement."

The younger girls sighed in wonder, their eyes glazing over as they themselves imagined themself in her position.

Hiding her grin, Y/n stood, bidding them goodbye before making ehr way to her own bridal suite, anticipation building in her gut.

Tomorrow.

°•°•°•○🌑○•°•°•°

Lady Oak, you are far too lucky. How did you even get him to agree to your proposal?

Somehow, after a whole day had passed, after the wedding officiant had pronounced Lucien and Y/n husband and wife, after the reception and dinner party, husband-stealers’ words came back to Y/n.

Was she not right for Lucien? Had he made a mistake? Would he doubt their marriage just as the ladies had?

"Y/n?"

She turned to her new husband, who grinned at her, holding open the door to their bed chamber. She tried to smile back, but of course, even under the dim lighting of the corridor, Lucien saw it.

"Did something happen?"

Y/n paused, wondering if she should tell him what she’d heard.

"It’s just… some ladies were talking about you last night." His brows furrowed and he nodded at her to continue. "They said you would… betray me."

Understanding dawned on his eyes, and he reached out to touch Y/n’s cheek. "You do not have to worry about that. I’d rather cut my own di- private parts off than be with someone that is not my lawfully wedded wife."

Y/n blushed. How could she ever have even given thought to husband-stealer’s words? They were just that. Words.

"Thank you."

He rolled his eyes. "Do not thank me for common human decency." He paused, then- "May I kiss you?"

Y/n’s breath hitched. "I’ve never-"

"Neither have I."

Y/n’s eyes widened. "But- but they said-"

"They assumed."

Y/n closed her mouth with a snap.

"I always thought being loyal to your future partner had a certain romantic side to it. So? May I kiss you now?"

"I- yes but I do not know how to-"

He kissed her.

"I am forever yours."

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saiyanprincessswanie · 3 days ago

Text

Mine - Part 5

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Female Reader

Word Count: 4235

Chapter Summary: Steve struggles with trust issues until a friendly face stops by. He knows he has to start somewhere so why not something that will mean everything to you? Steve and you discover that you will soon be having a child together. Will this news break you down or will it give you the future you always wanted?

Warnings: Some angst, fluff moments, learning to trust, smut, fingering, brief hand job, multiple orgasms & pregnancy kink.

A/N: This chapter isn’t dark like the other ones. This is the final chapter but there will be an epilogue later on.

A/N 2: header by @fictional-affairs and thank you to my beta reader @lfnr-blog-blog-blog

To catch up on the series read here: Mine - Series Masterlist

Reblogs & Comments are welcomed and encouraged. Even if you leave an emoji you will make my day. 😊💜

I do NOT consent to translating or reposting my work on any social media platform, app, or third-party site. If you see my work anywhere besides my personal Tumblr & AO3 accounts, it has been stolen. I will NEVER give written or verbal permission to repost or translate any of my fanfics as they’re MY intellectual property. 🚫🚫

It’s been a week since you both decided to start over again. Building trust was important to both of you and being honest, whether one wanted to hear the truth or not, was just as important. You and Steve were able to start this unconventional relationship by talking about anything and everything.

Of course, Steve wanted to talk about your future and what you both wanted or saw in the next five years. His answer was simple: he wanted to be married and have kids. He wanted everything he had ever dreamt of and he saw that future with you.

Yours you hesitated on at first. Yes, you wanted to get married in a small intimate wedding and eventually wanted to start a family. You also desired a little freedom to be able to do all of this one day as you wanted to shed the rocky start you both had. It was important to also be able to get your super soldier strength back as you wanted to feel normal again and not this frail human being he reduced you to. Steve told you he would think about that one and that you needed to earn it.

The sex was also amazing between the two of you. It was as if you were a newly married couple on their honeymoon as many times as you did it throughout the day. The pleasure you would pull out of one another drove the cravings to new heights. This had to be the highlight of your days spent with him. However, you did worry about the lack of birth control not being used.

Though as amazing as that was, a part of you deep down inside still felt trapped and wanted to escape. The other part argued that you have one of the best setups in your life and you could finally be with the one man you always had feelings for. You had the house you wanted, the man you wanted, and this could be the life you always dreamt of. Maybe it didn’t start like you thought but you deserved to have this dream come true even if Steve was still controlling and watching you like a hawk at every moment.

Your days seem to become repetitive as well and that starts weighing you down. Something was missing in your life and you knew just what it was, friends. You missed hanging out with Natasha. You missed the gossip, the laughs, and especially the training with her. Is this something that Steve would allow you to have again? This was a conversation you will need to have with him.

For now, you stayed curled up on the couch reading your favorite book while Steve was on the phone with Tony just outside the door. He watched you with curious eyes, making sure you didn’t run like you had in the past. Though he told himself this was a new start and he had to learn to trust you to do the right thing. The call wasn’t long and it was mainly catching up. Steve also placed an order for food and supplies they would need for the month. Steve was sure to give a list of things you asked for that would make your stay comfortable. When he was done he hung up the phone and walked into the house.

You looked up from your book and met his deep blue eyes. You couldn’t help but smile at the man you loved. Patting the seat on the couch next to you, Steve took the hint and sat down. Your hand held his momentarily as he got comfy next to you. Taking a breath you worked up the courage to ask him a question.

“Steve, what would you say to me reaching out to Natasha? I mean she was my best friend after all and I miss her dearly. I miss the talks with her and the support she gave me. I need to have someone to talk with besides you.”

You bit your lower lip and worried maybe you stepped over the line. But Steve gave you a reassuring smile as his hand tightened around yours.

“I think we can work that out. I know Nat has been bugging me since you came here. She really misses you as well. Just know she won’t try to help you escape. She will just be your friend only.”

Steve stared at you as he watched his words sink in. You nodded your head in agreement knowing full well that Nat wouldn’t help you since Steve had hinted at that before. You had a feeling that all the Avengers were in on this which broke your heart initially. Little did you know that they each were out for a partner to call their own? For now, you continued to make the best of your situation despite all your mixed feelings.

Steve was a man of his word and Natasha came to visit you both a week later. He was outside talking to her while you waited patiently in the living room. You wondered what Steve was saying to her. Was he placing down rules for the visit or having a friendly chat? Your nerves were starting to get the best of you until you heard the door open and shut. Looking over your shoulder you saw Nat and Steve walking into the room smiling. Nat practically ran to you as you stood up from the couch. Her arms wrapped around you and you smiled hugging her back.

“I’ve missed you so much,” Nat whispered into your ear.

Tears formed in your eyes as you whispered the same thing to her. “I’ve missed you too.”

Steve watched as you both embraced and he could see the smiles on both of your faces. If this is what you needed to make you more comfortable and trusting around him, then that needed to be. Steve cleared his throat to get both of their attention.

“I hope you two have a wonderful time catching up. If you need me I will be outside.”

As he turned on his heel to leave you called out for him, “Steve?”

He turned to look at you.

“Thank you for this. I appreciate it.”

Steve nodded and headed outside to get some work done.

When you both were alone you sat on the couch facing each other. Nat smiled at you as she took in your appearance. She was good at always reading you.

“So how are you doing? This is me asking as your friend, not Steve’s spy.”

“I’m doing well. I mean what’s there really to say? I was forced here by Steve, the man I have loved for years, to become some housewife or sex object to him. Don’t get me wrong I enjoy the sex now but everything started so badly between us.”

“Well, I’m happy to hear you at least love him. I get how things started out was rocky for you but are you pleased with him now?” Nat inquired.

You sighed and nodded your head. “I’m as happy as I can be in my situation. I’m still mad he won’t let me have my super soldier powers back. He said I had to earn it. I don’t even know where to start Nat with that. He may never give me that back and I’m tired of feeling frail all the time. I mean even now as we speak I’m not well. I started throwing up a few mornings ago and I feel like death. I’m tired and I just can’t keep up with him.”

Nat looked at you up and down taking in your features. A soft smile played on her lips. “When was the last time you had your cycle?”

You started to think of the last time you had it. “I think the last time was before Steve brought me here. You don’t think I’m pregnant do you?”

“How often do you have unprotected sex?” She questioned.

It was at the moment your stomach felt ill again. “I-we have it daily. Like several times a day.”

Nat grinned at you. “I have to say you’re glowing. I just so happened to bring some tests with me as Steve asked me to. Here let me get you one.”

Nat walked over to the dining room table and opened a bag she had with her. Taking the test she handed it to you. “Go and take it. I will wait for you here.”

You grabbed the test from her and practically ran to the bathroom on the first floor. Quickly, you took the test and sat it on the counter. The test felt like it was taking forever to give you results. You were thinking how you just told Steve over a week ago that you wanted to wait. What would you do if this came back positive? Heck, you did want a child one day but not now while you’re trying to figure this relationship out.

A knock on the door had you panicking as you looked down to see the result was indeed positive. A gasp left your mouth as another knock and Nat’s voice filled the air. You opened the door with tears streaming down your face. Nat looked at you and hugged you instantly knowing what the result was.

“I’m not ready Nat. Not now while we are working through everything.”

Nat just held you running soft soothing circles on your back. “You’re ready my friend. This is what you have always wanted with the person you’re with. It may be a shock now but let it sink in over the next few weeks. I know Steve is going to be very excited to hear the news.”

As if the news wasn’t shocking enough the door closed behind Steve as he entered the room. “What news?” he asked as he took in your distressed look and tears.

“Sweetheart, are you okay?” Steve takes a few steps toward you and Nat. His voice is laced with concern.

You let go of Nat and take a few steps back, trying to put distance between the two of you. Honestly, you weren’t sure how to feel. Everything was starting to feel rushed instead of flowing naturally between you and Steve. The room started to get warm and your vision started to tunnel.

“Hun you don’t look okay. Why don’t you sit down.” Nat asked as you stumbled in the living room.

The room felt like it was spinning and you felt sick to your stomach. This is all a bad dream you were telling yourself. You started to hyperventilate which caused Steve to move quicker so he was now by your side holding your shoulders.

“Sweetheart, what do you need? You’re starting to scare me.” He stated, taking in your features.

“I’m gonna be sick.” You exclaimed, pushing him away and running to the bathroom. You emptied the contents of your stomach into the toilet as Steve stood outside the door.

“Nat, I’m worried. She’s been throwing up a lot lately. I’m thinking we need a doctor to see why she is so sick.”

Nat shook her head. “Steve, can't you see she’s not sick like a cold, she’s pregnant. All those mornings being sick to her stomach and she hasn’t had her cycle since before you brought her here. You both are gonna have a baby.”

Steve stood there shocked by what his friend was saying. He did it. He finally did what he set out to accomplish. This child was going to bind them together forever. Now he just needed to get married to her to make it official.

“I-I’m going to be a dad?” Tears filled his eyes as he watched you flush the toilet and sit up against the wall.

Steve knelt next to you and gently hugged you. You weren’t feeling all that great but let Steve do as he pleased. He held you close as he whispered how much he loved you.

“We’re gonna be a family sweetheart. Can’t you just picture how perfect our lives are gonna be?” Steve went to kiss your forehead but you pushed him back causing him to land on his butt.

“No Steve this is not perfect, nothing about this is perfect. What we needed was time together to work on us. I still needed time to adjust to this life you threw on me. Now I have to focus on a baby instead who is gonna grow up with a psychopath for a dad.”

Steve stood up, towering over you. “I’m not a psychopath. I’m not the bad guy here. Remember it takes two people to make a baby. You never complained once while we made love. I get that you’re scared but I would watch your tone with me.”

You stood up from the floor and stared angrily into his dark blue eyes. “I never asked this in my life. Remember I’m the victim here. Now bringing a baby into the equation they will be a victim as well. Where are they supposed to make friends in the middle of nowhere? Go to school? They will wonder why I can’t go anywhere.” Tears started to fall from your eyes. “I feel suffocated being in this house all the time and having no freedom. Right now you are ruining the one time I could see a friendly face. I just can’t handle this anymore.”

Nat walked in between the two of you and held you while you cried. Steve stared at the two women and was about to say something when Nat shook her head no. Angry with how this took a turn for the worse Steve headed for the door and left slamming the door behind him.

“Come on dear, let's go sit down. The stress isn’t good for a baby.” Walking to the couch you both sit down, not saying anything for several minutes.

“Nat, what am I supposed to do?” You whispered.

“Do you love Steve?” She asked.

You gave her a weird look. “Why does that matter?”

Nat chuckled, “Don’t be difficult 'cause you're mad it’s a simple answer. Do you love him?”

Taking a deep breath in and out you nodded. “Of course I do. I always have despite everything that has happened between us.”

Nat smiled at you. “That’s great. Now do you regret getting pregnant?”

“No, I don’t. I’m just shocked that it happened so fast. I just feel alone in this.” You looked down at your hands in your lap.

“Breathe hun. First off you aren’t alone. You have Steve and me to help you out. You will have the best doctor who will help you through all this. Plus Bucky and his wife are about due any day now with their baby. Bucky doesn’t live that far from here and you know the guys will want to raise the kids together. So you don’t have to worry about your child being alone. I promise you everything is going to work out.”

You think about everything Nat just said and determine she has a point. Maybe things won’t be as bad as you think. Steve was starting to trust you around the house more and now with a baby on the way maybe he would start giving you more freedom. It’s not like you could run anyway, especially while pregnant. Steve would hunt you down in a heartbeat and make your life hell again. You decide to make things work for the sake of the baby. There was love and hope between the two of you. Steve was old-fashioned and no doubt was planning to propose to you now. You decided no more whining, no more doubt, that today going forward you were going to embrace your new life.

You headed upstairs to relax as Nat was leaving the house. She ran into Steve and told him about the conversation you just had together. Nat reassured Steve that you weren’t gonna run away and that you just needed time to wrap your brain around the news. Nat explained how you came out and confessed your love toward him. That she thought this was good enough to keep you together.

This made Steve happy to hear. He wished you would have expressed this to him but was grateful that you had Nat to talk with. Steve had put up all the food and supplies that Nat brought with her and she was about to leave.

“One more thing Steve. You have to give her back her super soldier powers again. She will need it during her pregnancy but will give her even more reason to trust you. This will be the right decision for you both.”

“Nat, are you sure she just won’t take off with the baby? I would be devastated to lose them both.” Steve stared at Nat with his hands on his hips trying to assess her.

“I swear to you as your friend and future aunt to your baby that she won’t run. You need to give her room to breathe.”

Steve let out a sigh. “Okay, I will do this for her.”

Nat hugged Steve and headed for her quinjet. She took off and headed back to New York.

Steve headed inside to look for you. Climbing the stairs he found you on the bed relaxing and talking to your stomach.

“I love you so much, my peanut. I can’t wait to meet you and hold you close to me. You’re gonna be your mama and daddy’s perfect little angel when you arrive.” You rubbed your stomach a couple of times before Steve interrupted you with him clearing his throat. You rolled over to see him walk into the bedroom and sit down next to you.

“Hey sweetheart, I’m sorry for getting upset earlier at you. When you called me a psychopath that hurt me. I’ve never shown you anything but love.”

You sat up on the bed next to him and took a breath. “I’m sorry for calling you that. I was just stressed and a little angry at the time. I know you have always shown me love and attention. So please accept my apology.”

Steve leaned in and wrapped an arm around you to hug you. “I forgive you. Also, I wanted to show you that I trust you by doing this.”

His fingers gently grabbed your wrist where the bracelet was and he put his thumbprint on it. The bracelet blinked a couple of times and then opened. He took the bracelet off you. Within moments you could feel your body tingle and then it stopped.

“I don’t want to control you anymore so now you’re super soldier serum should be working once again. I want us to be equals in this relationship. I want you to be able to trust me and vice versa. We are going to become a family and I want this to work between us.” Steve rubbed the back of his head and just continued to gaze at you.

You couldn’t believe what he just did. This meant so much to you that you got teary-eyed. “Steve, I don't even know where to begin to thank you. To know you trust me enough to take that bracelet off means the world to me. I want you to know I’m with you until the end of the line.”

Steve hugged you tight, kissing you on the forehead.

“God, I love you so much. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to watch our kids grow and I want to grow old with you. You bring out the best of me sweetheart and I know I can do the same with you. What I’m trying to get at is will you be mine forever by marrying me?”

Steve got down on one knee and pulled a black velvet box out of his pants pocket. As he opened it your mouth dropped open in shock as you stared at a beautiful diamond ring that was shining back at you.

“Yes! Yes, I will.”

You threw yourself at Steve who caught you easily. Your lips planted on his as you both started to kiss. Steve’s tongue caressed yours as you moaned into the kiss. Your fingers ran through his hair causing a groan from him. Steve pulled back briefly and started to take the ring out of the box, slipping it onto your ring finger. Steve lifted you with ease and gently placed you onto the bed.

“I want you sweetheart. I need to be inside you. What do you say? Will you be mine?” He huskily asked.

You nodded your head and started to pull clothes off one another. Clothes were flying around the room until you were both naked. The both of you were knelt on the bed when Steve’s fingers moved swiftly to your pussy and felt that you were already aroused. Pushing his fingers into you, you let out a gasp as he started to thrust them into you. Every thrust inside you had you moaning over and over again. Your forehead rested against his shoulder as he continued to pull you apart piece by piece. Steve made a come hither motion with his fingers against that spongy spot inside you. Within seconds you were cumming on his fingers and groaning his name. As he pulled his fingers out of you, you shoved him onto his back and straddled him.

“Sorry Stevie but I need you.”

You wrap your hand around his hard cock and start to stroke him. Your hand starts slow and steady finding a nice rhythm that has him softly cussing at how good it feels. When you see precum spilling down his tip you speed up a little making him a panting mess as you continue to play with him. But you suddenly stop and rub his cock in between your folds as you adjust above him. His cock is right at your cunt and you start to sink down on him slowly causing him to whisper out “fuck”. Slowly you start to ride him. Up and down, up and down you ride him like your life depends on it. Steve grabs your hips as he thrusts up into you. Your hands are on his chest as you circle your hips to keep up your pace with him. You both are groaning and moaning at the sensation you both bring to the other.

Steve loves seeing you on top of him like this watching you ride his cock while purring out his name. Your breathy pants and the way you take him is the sexiest thing he has ever witnessed. His right hand slides to your stomach and he gently rubs his hand there. Knowing he was the one to get you pregnant makes him feel accomplished and proud. He would keep you pregnant as much as he could. Steve longed to see the changes your body would make from your wider hips to your breasts. He would worship you every day in bed for as long as he lived. His hand moves slowly down your stomach and finds his prize, your clit. Steve’s thumb lightly starts to rub circles around it making you moan more as you speed up riding him. He knows you’re close, and can feel your walls hugging his cock tight. He fucks up into you harder and has you cumming undone for him above him.

“Oh, Steve…” You shout above him as he continues to fuck you through your high. Your fingernails scratch down his chest causing him to hiss out in pleasure and pain.

Quickly Steve rolls you to your back and starts plunging into you over and over. All you can do is hold onto his shoulders as he takes you apart again. His hips are ruthless as they thrust into you at a punishing pace. Steve knows he's hit your spot when your eyes close and you choke out a moan. Your legs wrap tight around his slim waist as you let him take you higher and higher.

“You feel so good, sweetheart. I need you to cum for me again.” He whispers down at you.

Harder and faster Steve continues to fuck you until your walls are tightening around him. You scream his name to the heavens cumming once more as he chases his end and cums deep inside you with a shout. Steve is panting above you as he pulls himself out of you and falls next to you on the bed. You're trying to catch your breath when you look over at him smiling as he kisses your shoulder.

“That was perfect Steve. Now that I have my super soldier strength back I can go several more rounds with you like before.” You wink at him and Steve lets out a growl.

“I’m going to fuck you into this mattress and have you begging for me to stop. But trust me I’m gonna be so thorough you won’t be able to get out of bed for the next few days. I’m gonna fuck this pussy every way I can imagine and make you mine again and again.

“Steve, I love when you talk like that. Now take me again…”

“My pleasure,” Steve smirked at you and kept his promise to destroy you.

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shabbytigers · 17 hours ago

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clusterfuque: navigating name and gender change legal-regulatory processes as a dual citizen of Germany and the US, paying taxes in both countries, under the emergent political pressure of a swiftly approaching unchecked fascist regime in at least one of those countries

i didn’t even want to fucking do this! at least till such time in the misty, nebulous, and highly uncertain and theoretical future as i, you know, pass? at all? for starters? tbh i was intending to spin this out a couple more years, or at least secure another full-time job, before dropping this Schrödinger’s bomb on my employability

but like a lot of other people i played myself: getting it sorted on the US side may now be a question of immediately or not at all. and i’m not sure it isn’t too late

the us passport people here are willing to sort gender marker on request and handle a name change later. us name and gender change are state, not federal, and new york makes it relatively easy and can be trusted for a little while at least. so far so good. but i doubt i can get through the state piece (which isn’t hazard free) in time to fix my social security id before monsters take over the SSA. i think they have to give me a name change if i have a court order about it, ditto the possibly new and worse passport people, but like ?? !! omg

furthermore my father is nearly 86 so it is not an option to simply decide to refrain from traveling DE><US while all this shit shakes out, as the nice berlin embassy email urged me to consider! a half-changed passport may create major hazard points at airports and at the border; so may discordance between the two passports

and i need to decide about all of this like tomorrow

berlin embassy e: “we encourage you to speak with a lawyer experienced in name-change/gender issues” my good bitch there is no lawyer on earth experienced in my proprietary blend of fucking issues

#vent moan and gripe #also of course i’m not really trans and all of this is just a weird hobby i should probably just put down and step away from :)

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seitmai · 22 hours ago

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Many thoughts...

Love at first sight, it was. But hell, love wasn’t enough, was it? What did he know about raising a little girl? What did he know of walking that tricky line between being overprotective and being too blasé, of giving you space but making you feel safe?

just that he is questions this, shows how much he cares about her 🫶🏻

Cecilia had stopped over a lot in the beginning, had soothed his fears. Had reassured him that love was enough, that he was doing a good job. He was kind and well-meaning, and you had been a smart kid who became a smart woman, and on the balance, he would have agreed with Cecilia and said he did alright.

Awesome job right there👏🏻

For the first time in his life, Rhett truly considers his future. What his life may look like in five, ten, twenty years. Will he always wake to grey mornings that sit on his chest like a stone? Will he become bitter and mean, the way his father has despite having a wife and sons and a granddaughter?

Uff he truly doesn't have the best role model..

Then, on top of the annoyance, another layer of shame. Of course you run. The death of your parents left you with that wound, the inability to handle hurt in a healthy way. You flee and tuck yourself in a corner, tend your wounds alone. It’s a flaw, but it’s understandable why you do it.

Very understandable reaction especiallywith that backstory..

Rhett had been your best friend, and for the briefest summer, he was your lover too. He should have been the one person to help you work through that fear. Instead, he only cemented it further.

💔💔💔

It’s easy to blame Rhett when Wyatt eats dinner alone each night. When he runs a vacuum over the floor of your bedroom, keeps it dust free like you may turn up any day and take your place back on the family ranch. When he studies the row of family photos on the mantle, sees his sister’s face and feels like he’s failed her in the care of her daughter.

He misses her so much 🥺

But Wyatt doesn’t confront Rhett at the Double Deuces. He doesn’t seek him out at all. Rhett comes to him.

👀

“You never fucking think, do you? Jesus fucking Christ, my sister…her husband…they were killed by a fucking drunk driver, and you have the fucking balls to…you asshole…you fucking piece of shit. You—” The kid seems to track Wyatt’s meaning. His bleary eyes clear a fraction and fix on where Wyatt’s fists wait, eager to offer some payback for his sins. Rhett nods, as if to himself, and he takes a deep breath. Closes his eyes, opens them. He struggles to stand, staggers a little, but eventually finds his feet.

Wyatts anger is very understandable and valid, but it seem to penetrate even Rhett’s drunken state

“Make it her.” It comes out one slurred word, makeither, and Wyatt’s anger cools by the barest degree. He unclenches his fists, holds them looser. “What the fuck you trying to say?” Rhett coughs, sways. Coughs again, then enunciates, clarifies. “Make it hurt. Make sh…sure. Make sure it hurts.” Wyatt’s fists uncurl more. “Now what are you—” “Am. Piece of shit. I am.” The kid sways more but takes a wide step, braces his legs wide to keep himself upright. “Y’right. Imma piece a’shit.” He wants to be hurt because it’s the only thing he knows, he thinks. Like I used to.

💔😭💔😭💔

Maybe Wyatt only fell into fatherhood because of a tragedy, but he gets more of it right than he will ever give himself credit for. He faces the kid, and when the kid comes swinging at him again, spoiling for a beat-down Wyatt will never deliver after all, Wyatt only opens his arms and lets Rhett step into them. The kid struggles for a beat but he’s drunk, and he seems tired down to his soul. It only takes a moment for the kid to stop struggling in Wyatt’s bear-hug, then sag against him in exhaustion, then weep in dry, barking sobs that feel like they’ve been building up for his entire life. And Wyatt knows exactly what sort of pain the kid is bleeding out because it was his pain, and his sister’s too, until they both fled their unhappy childhood home and made a happier one here on this ranch.

Wyatt gives Rhett the hug he himself needed years ago 😭🥺

Wyatt is never sure the right way to tell you that Rhett Abbott is currently crashing with him. A month passes and then another, and he starts to feel guilty that the kid who broke your heart has been living down the hall from your childhood bedroom, sitting at your kitchen table. That he parks his truck beside yours, and that he’s caught the kid—more than once—lingering by your bedroom door, lingering by your truck, like your ghost might manifest if he stands still enough.

That's a tough spot..

I can’t be mad about it, you write back. How many times did you look the other way when I brought a stray home?

I guess you deserve a stray of your own. Might want to take him in for his shots though. :-)

You got a heart of gold, kiddo, Wyatt texts you, and your response is immediate.

That's so cute, they have such a beautiful relationship 🥰

Wyatt grins when he reads your email, then glances over at where Rhett is sitting on the couch, watching TV. The kid does act like a stray; he cringes the barest bit if Wyatt moves too suddenly or too close to him, but like a stray, he relishes the comfort of a warm home, food in his belly, and even the tamest praise.

He really is a stray 🤭

Got it from my uncle.

🥹🥹🥹

Wyatt won’t know it until years from now, when he’s an old man and Rhett has grey in his own hair, but this stretch of time—the two men working and living together—is when Rhett starts to learn how to be a man. That Wyatt is the gruff but kind, slightly awkward father-figure Rhett always needed.

I'm so glad Rhett gets the chance to experience this kind of relationship and space to grow 🥹

Heart of gold, indeed. It makes Wyatt tear up, first from so much pride it feels like his chest might burst, then from that knife edge of grief that his sister isn’t here to see what a force for good her daughter turned into.

🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

“Nah. I don’t know if hate is something she can even feel. Dislike, maybe. Disappointment. Not hate.” “She should hate me. I deserve it.”

He is so hard on himself 🥺

“I didn’t mean to hurt her, you know. Sounds fucking stupid, but at the time, I didn’t even realize what I was doing to her.” Rhett glances over at the man, fixes his eyes back on the floor. “Looking back, it felt like I was sleepwalking through that summer, and now I’m awake and see all the damage I did.” “Damned if I know. But take it from me, kid. I had a girl when I was your age, and I fucked it up completely. Even once I realized how badly I fucked up, I was too proud to try and set it right. Now it’s been years and it’s far too late. So you gotta try, so even if she never forgives you, it’ll set right in your chest that you did everything you could.”

I love their honest and open conversations 🥰

Your uncle glances over at Rhett, nods in his direction. “We’re doing okay for a couple of guys.”

They truly are 🫶🏻🥹

You laugh, and the sound makes Rhett smile – when was the last time he heard it? It draws another laugh, which makes Rhett laugh, which makes you stop and ask your uncle if Rhett is there too. “He is,” Wyatt admits. “We’re watching the football game.” There’s a beat of silence from you that seems to stretch out forever but is probably only a second or two. “Merry Christmas, Rhett,” you say, and Wyatt hesitates, then tilts the screen so Rhett can see you and you can see him. He almost doesn’t want to look but he can’t help himself.

🥹🥹🥹

“In that case, Uncle Wyatt, work him into the ground,” you joke back, and Wyatt turns his phone back to him this time, and Rhett is left with perhaps a bit more than a sliver of hope. He leans back on the couch and thinks that yes, maybe he can salvage this after all. Maybe trying his best will be enough.

I'm sure it will 🥹🫶🏻

I absolutely loved this story and the relationship Rhett and Wyatt built, truly beautiful 🥰

Kind of a Sh*thead

(Rhett Abbott x F!Reader)

CW: Angst; family-type healing; allusions to and threat of violence; bit of fluff at the end.

Word Count: 5256

AN: This was originally requested by @elegantmusicdragon from a long-ago Christmas prompt list: "trying to hide their sadness during the christmas celebration" from the sad christmas prompts? Definitely angst...maybe with a little hope at the end?"

AN: This is the next piece in the "Mending Fences" miniseries, found here.

It will shame Rhett in the future, how long it takes for him to realize what has happened.

That night at the bar, he sat waiting for you: nursing a beer, his eyes on the door, ready to get a little loose with you and maybe head out to the open range and fool around.

Then Maria appeared in front of him. Like magic. Like an angel spirited back to Wabang and right in front of him. It threw him off completely, his world tilting sideways He found himself dazzled by the fact that the girl he pined over for years was suddenly in front of him, smiling, laughing, touching his arm and squeezing his bicep while he subtly flexed it under her fingers.

It wasn’t until last call that Rhett surfaced for a moment, the spell lifting for long enough to remember he was supposed to meet you, yet you were nowhere to be found.

She must have been held over late at work, he reasoned, and even as he thought it, he knew it was a lie.

It will shame Rhett in the future, but it will take months before he really feels that shame. He’ll find out you left early for school, but by then, he will be entirely wrapped in the magic of Maria, dumb with lust and love that he thinks is finally reciprocated. He'll send you a handful of texts, bland little things that you read but don’t respond to.

Months later, when Wabang is sliding fast to a cold winter and Maria is gone again, disappeared as quickly as she appeared, Rhett will feel shame.

And you’ll be long gone.

*****

Wyatt wishes he knew what he was doing. Hell, he’d be happy for an inkling.

When his sister and brother-in-law died, he didn’t even hesitate to step up and take his niece in. No brainer. Blood is blood, but Wyatt loved his sister something fierce, and taking you in was like holding on to a part of her even if she was gone.

Didn’t hurt that Wyatt loved you for you. That he had loved you from the first time his sister set you in his arms, a bundle only a few days old. You’d set your wide eyes on him and blinked sleepily, then puked up a torrent of milk on him that reeked something fierce.

Love at first sight, it was.

But hell, love wasn’t enough, was it? What did he know about raising a little girl? What did he know of walking that tricky line between being overprotective and being too blasé, of giving you space but making you feel safe?

Nothing about this feels alright, though.

Wyatt always guessed it was Rhett Abbott who left you stranded at that hotel when you were a senior in high school. Little fucker skulked around that entire summer, scampered away like a cat with a lit tail when he saw Wyatt coming. Something had happened between the two of you.

When you came back to Wabang finally, you took up with the little fucker again, and Wyatt thought maybe he had been unkind. Ungenerous. He tried to be nicer to Rhett, but the kid barely ever mets his eyeline.

What the hell, Wyatt thought. The Abbotts can be a squirrelly bunch. As long as he doesn’t hurt her.

All those years ago at the hotel, Wyatt was never sure who it was that left you stranded and tear-streaked. This time, though?

You confirmed it that evening when you got home, eyes unseeing as you charged past him, thundered up the stairs, started packing. When he confronted you, you burst into tears and spilled the entire sorry affair.

You and Rhett, hanging out all summer. You in love, and Rhett…not. Not with you, anyway.

Wyatt wasn’t stupid. When you said hanging out, he could guess what you meant.

Seeing his niece hurt like that made him see red, but he has a modicum of maturity, which means he bides his time in most things.

*****

Maria’s been gone for months.

You’ve been gone for longer.

Winter in Wyoming is no joke. Wabang gets less snow than other parts, but the wind cuts marrow-deep, and the days are short, grey affairs. The holidays could be a break from the doldrums, but Royal has been on a tear lately, lighting into Rhett for every little thing, so Thanksgiving, then Christmas are tense and joyless.

He sends you texts. Little one-liners, asking how you are, saying he misses you. He tries to feel you out, but you leave him on read and never respond.

Once, he gets blisteringly drunk and tries to call. You don’t pick up, and he doesn’t leave a message.

By now, the shame has settled into him and made itself at home.

He can guess that you came by the bar that night. He can guess that you saw him and Maria, and that’s what caused you to flee. Layered on top of the shame is an annoyance with you and your knack for running. He may be an asshole but you’re a child to run and hide when shit gets tough.

Rhett had been your best friend, and for the briefest summer, he was your lover too. He should have been the one person to help you work through that fear. Instead, he only cemented it further.

*****

March. The leaden skies start to take on some blue, high up in the atmosphere. The sun burns a little warmer. The barnyard thaws into a swamp, and Wyatt has to handle the anxious animals, pawing and snorting and half-mad from a winter of cabin fever.

March is a tough month, though, because you call and tell him you aren’t coming back to Wabang for the summer. You got a coveted internship with a specialty vet hospital in the city, and while Wyatt knows it’s a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for you, it’s far easier to blame that fucking asshole Abbott boy.

He’s not irrational about it. He knows he has to let you fly and trust you’ll return. Vet training is a long process—it’s not like you went off to Cheyenne for a handful of bookkeeping courses. He knows, deep-down, you would have always left for your schooling.

Still, that fucking Abbott boy has built up a tab, in Wyatt’s eyes. March is when that tab comes due.

-----

He knows the boy drinks at the Double Deuces. It’s common gossip how he overdoes it and either gets ornery with the Tillerson’s or pukes himself silly in the parking lot. There’s whispers of the fights between Royal and the boy, how the elder Abbott is tired of bailing out his youngest son, though no one would ever accuse Royal of having any patience, especially where Rhett is concerned.

If it were anyone else—any other dickhead young buck—Wyatt would chuckle in sympathy. He used to do the same when he was younger. He knows what the Wabang drunk tank looks like. Hell, maybe his name is still there—he scratched it into the pea-green paint of the wall decades back to commemorate his first overnight stay.

But Wyatt doesn’t confront Rhett at the Double Deuces. He doesn’t seek him out at all.

Rhett comes to him.

It’s a Saturday night, and Wyatt is lazing in front of the TV, watching the recaps of the week’s basketball games. He’s half-asleep when he hears the heavy, scuffing tread of boots on his porch, then a thumping fist at the door.

When he peeks out of the window to see who it is, it’s the fucking asshole. Rhett sways unsteady on his feet. Wyatt opens the door, and he can smell the reek of cheap beer and brown liquor. When he peers out farther, he can see where the fucking asshole parked his truck, half in the driveway and half in the yard, the tires sunk deep in the soft spring turf.

“You drive here like that?” Wyatt asks, though it’s obvious.

The kid nods.

Wyatt sighs, scrubs his hand over his jaw. “Tell me you came from next door. Tell me you were drinking at home and not out on the roads fucking loaded.”

Rhett stares at him, his eyes bleary and blood-shot, his blinks slow and deliberate. “Came from t’bar,” he slurs.

“Fucking prick.” Wyatt breathes it out.

His vision wavers for a moment, the rage that courses through him is so hot and sudden. He moves towards the kid just as Rhett sways towards him, and in a blink, Wyatt finds his hands on him, his sweat-dampened t-shirt twisted in his fists. This close, the beer fumes make his eyes water, and when Wyatt studies the kid’s face, he sees blank stupefaction.

“You fucking little prick.” He pivots, turns, hauls Rhett away from the front door, down off the porch. He half-drags, half-carries him, and once they are on the soft grass of the front yard, Wyatt shoves him away.

“Stupid, selfish. So fucking selfish.” The rage feels good, like a narcotic in his veins. “You could have killed someone, driving like this.”

“I didn’t…” Rhett sways on his feet, struggles to get his balance. “Didn’t—”

“Didn’t what?”

“Didn’t t-think—”

Wyatt is on him again, his hands firm on Rhett’s chest as he shoves him in earnest, sends the kid stumbling back on his ass. “You never fucking think, do you? Jesus fucking Christ, my sister…her husband…they were killed by a fucking drunk driver, and you have the fucking balls to…you asshole…you fucking piece of shit. You—”

But he can’t even finish. His sister and brother-in-law, your parents. Years ago now, but the pain is still fresh, a keen edge of a knife blade that takes his breath away. It was after a rodeo, a random Saturday. One stupid fucking decision and Wyatt lost his family, you lost your parents, and the rest of the world had the bad taste to keep on going.

There’s a roadside memorial on the road out of Wabang that marks the site of the crash. It makes that knife blade of grief twist in Wyatt’s gut every time he sees it.

Anger—rage—is such a close neighbor to grief. Grief is something one has to feel, but anger? That’s something to embrace, to lean into. To do.

Wyatt advances on Rhett, his big fists opening and closing as the kid struggles to get back on his feet. Wyatt wants to beat the shit out of him, wants to see him bruised and bloodied on the ground: for hurting you years ago, for hurting you more recently, and now this. For taking his life and the life of anyone else on the road into his own stupid, selfish hands.

Rhett manages to find his knees, and he kneels in the grass but can seem to get no further. Wyatt towers over him.

“Get up,” he orders. His voice is low, deadly, and his tone must penetrate the booze-fog because the kid tilts his head up and looks at him.

“Get up,” he repeats. “Get up and face it like a man.”

Rhett only manages a dumbfounded, “huh?”

“You wanna drive a big truck like a big man? Drink at the Double D’s like a big fucking man? You wanna fuck around with my niece and break her fucking heart like a big man? So stand up and take what’s coming to you like a man.”

The kid seems to track Wyatt’s meaning. His bleary eyes clear a fraction and fix on where Wyatt’s fists wait, eager to offer some payback for his sins. Rhett nods, as if to himself, and he takes a deep breath. Closes his eyes, opens them. He struggles to stand, staggers a little, but eventually finds his feet.

“Make it her.” It comes out one slurred word, makeither, and Wyatt’s anger cools by the barest degree. He unclenches his fists, holds them looser.

“What the fuck you trying to say?”

Rhett coughs, sways. Coughs again, then enunciates, clarifies.

“Make it hurt. Make sh…sure. Make sure it hurts.”

Wyatt’s fists uncurl more. “Now what are you—”

“Am. Piece of shit. I am.” The kid sways more but takes a wide step, braces his legs wide to keep himself upright. “Y’right. Imma piece a’shit.”

As quickly as Wyatt’s rage came on him, it flees him just as fast. He sees it just as clear as day, how Rhett Abbott ain’t a man. He’s just a boy playing at it, fucking up as he goes. Wyatt knows as well as anyone the sort of father the kid has, Royal Abbott is no model of what a man should be.

The kid standing in front of him is just a hurt animal: hurt by his own father, hurt by his own behavior because he has no idea how to not take out his hurt on others.

He waves his hand at the kid, a dismissive gesture, and he starts to turn away. He is halfway back to the house when he hears the kid coming for him, feels the weak glancing blow of the punch that has no aim or power because the kid is too drunk.

He wants to be punished, he thinks as he turns back around to face Rhett. He knows Royal is hard on his youngest son, can guess that the kid’s been knocked around plenty. His own father…well, he keeps that buried in the past, but sometimes it pops up like a bad penny. Like now.

He wants to be hurt because it’s the only thing he knows, he thinks. Like I used to.

It only takes a moment for the kid to stop struggling in Wyatt’s bear-hug, then sag against him in exhaustion, then weep in dry, barking sobs that feel like they’ve been building up for his entire life. And Wyatt knows exactly what sort of pain the kid is bleeding out because it was his pain, and his sister’s too, until they both fled their unhappy childhood home and made a happier one here on this ranch.

“Christ almighty,” Wyatt says after the kid calms. He doesn’t let him go—he only gets an arm around his shoulders, and he leads him inside.

No sense sending him home to his father. He’s here now, so he might as well sleep it off on the couch.

-----

It’s less than a month before Rhett returns. Maybe a handful of weeks later, the kid turns up on Wyatt’s step, sheepish. Looking small.

Wyatt will never be clear exactly why Rhett and Royal fall out so terrifically. Who can say? The Abbotts can be squirrelly fucking assholes, back to Royal’s father and probably even further back, but Rhett finds himself kicked out with nowhere to go.

He takes the couch for a night, but the next day, Wyatt thrusts some fresh sheets in the kid’s arms and directs him to the guest room down the hall. Past your bedroom.

“Might sleep better in an actual bed,” he tells the kid, his voice gruff.

“I’ll be out as soon as I can.” Rhett’s ears burn red in shame. “Just gotta line up a place.”

“No rush.”

“Seriously, I’ll—”

“I got plenty of room. You ain’t putting me out.”

-----

Every time you call. Each Facetime. Wyatt wants to say something and doesn’t.

Wyatt ends up taking the coward’s way out: he sends you an email. Keeps it short and sweet, apologizes for not saying anything sooner. He alludes to the situation between father and son, but clarifies that Rhett is in no way forgiven for how he treated you. It’s just that the kid needed a soft place to land, and he had the ability to help, so he felt it was his God-given duty to do so.

But I can ask him to leave, if you want, he writes. If it makes you uncomfortable. You’ll always be my first and top priority, kiddo.

It takes you two days to reply, but that means nothing. You have a brutal schedule and often go radio silent for stretches of time. When you do reply, it makes Wyatt smile.

I can’t be mad about it, you write back. How many times did you look the other way when I brought a stray home? I guess you deserve a stray of your own. Might want to take him in for his shots though. :-)

You got a heart of gold, kiddo, Wyatt texts you, and your response is immediate.

Got it from my uncle.

-----

Through the summer and autumn, the two men fall into a rhythm. It isn’t so bad living with the kid, once he starts to get his sea-legs under him. Once he starts to feel like the bottom won’t drop out. Rhett puts in an honest day’s work on the ranch, and Wyatt pays him. The first time he presses money on the kid, he tries to push it away, embarrassed at what he thinks is more charity on top of the charity of room and board…

“You work for me, you work for me,” Wyatt said, blunt. “Means you get paid by me. Take it or leave.”

There are lessons embedded in their days working the ranch. The lessons ease Rhett out of the fog of his life, the strange liminal space of being in his early twenties but still just a kid.

When Rhett royally fucks up a stretch of fencing, ruins a day of work. Wyatt only grunts, shakes his head, then claps Rhett on the back.

“You can either take the time to plan out a job, or plan on doing the job twice,” is all he says, and he guesses that Royal would have belted his son into the dirt for such an error.

When Wyatt tasks Rhett with a simple rewiring job in the barn, replacing some light fixtures, and the kid has no idea where to even start. He spends half the day sweating about it, a sick feeling churning in his stomach, until he decides to throw up the white flag and admit he has no experience working with electrical fixtures.

“Well, hell, kid. Why didn’t you say something?” Wyatt jerks his chin towards the barn. “C’mon, I’ll show you.”

When at the rodeo, Rhett is tossed from the bull within seconds, a humiliating display. Afterwards, his body bruised but his ego far worse off, Wyatt only chuckles at him, says life will throw you off like that sometimes and it’s the getting back up that shows character.

“You got back up,” he tells Rhett. “That means something.”

“Means I didn’t want to get trampled,” he grumbles.

“Still means something.”

-----

Always, though, there’s the specter of you.

Wyatt catches the kid standing in the doorway of your bedroom sometimes still. Peering in at the time capsule of your stuff: the clothes you’ve left behind, the framed photos, the beat-to-shit stuffed bear on your bed.

Wyatt mentions you in passing, but he never brings up that long-ago night at the hotel or your sudden flight from Wabang the summer before. He guesses Rhett already feels terrible all the time, so why bother bringing it up and make it worse?

The kid eventually broaches the subject all on his own, just as winter descends on Wabang again. It’s been over a year since either of them have seen you in person, though Wyatt Facetimes you at least once a week.

Rhett makes himself scarce during those calls, but Wyatt’s always had the impression he’s not far off, maybe straining to make out your voice through the wall.

In early December, you break the news that you aren’t coming home for the holiday break. Wyatt would suspect that Rhett might be the reason, but your eyes practically glitter with excitement as you talk about a massive stray animal sweep you’ve helped plan, a Christmas-into-New Years take-to-the-streets movement to find and rescue as many street dogs and cats as you can. You’ve been working with local Girl Scouts to build feral cat cold-weather shelters, and you’ve been raising money and donations, and you’ve built a strong foster network, and local clinics are ready to spay and neuter and administer vaccines—

When Wyatt breaks the news to Rhett later, though, the kid sorta deflates, and that’s when he brings it up himself.

“It’s my fault,” he mumbles. “She’ll never come back if I’m here.”

“Not true.” Wyatt goes to the refrigerator and snags two bottles of beer, then hands one off to Rhett. He settles in his easy chair and studies the kid. “You know she loves animals. She’ll come back eventually.”

“She hates me.”

“Nah. I don’t know if hate is something she can even feel. Dislike, maybe. Disappointment. Not hate.”

“She should hate me. I deserve it.”

And then it spills out, one clipped sentence at a time. The entire history of you two, from best friends in childhood to passing acquaintances to an awkward moment in a hotel that Wyatt now knows was not actual sex but just some fooling around that ended in a cruel words. When Rhett gets to the part of the story about your summer together, Wyatt holds up a palm, says, “yeah, don’t want the details at all,” and Rhett slouches against the couch and sighs.

Wyatt chuckles sadly. He knows the feeling. He has his own hurt women in his past, experienced the same sort of heartless sleepwalking.

The kid shakes his head and continues. “Wasn’t worth it. Maria, I mean. I don’t even know what I saw in her.

“You were thinking with the wrong brain,” he tells Rhett. Wyatt may have no lost love for Maria Olivaries, but he’d admit she was a pretty gal. He could see why the boys went a little stupid around her.

“Wasn’t thinkin’ at all.” He says your name, a sigh in his mouth, then adds, “I don’t know what to do.”

“Look.” Wyatt sets his empty beer bottle aside, leans forward. “You gotta try to make it right with her. How you square it up is up to you. Maybe she’ll forgive you, maybe she won’t, but you gotta make an honest try at it.”

“How?”

“Damned if I know. But take it from me, kid. I had a girl when I was your age, and I fucked it up completely. Even once I realized how badly I fucked up, I was too proud to try and set it right. Now it’s been years and it’s far too late. So you gotta try, so even if she never forgives you, it’ll set right in your chest that you did everything you could.”

Rhett stares at him for a long beat, then nods. Then there’s a beat of glassiness in his eyes, near-tears, that Rhett blinks away almost angrily before he turns and clears his throat.

“I don’t mean to, you know. I don’t mean to be a piece of shit,” he says, his voice rough-edged.

“Aw hell, kid.” Wyatt heaves himself out of his chair and starts to make his way back to the kitchen for another beer. He stops in front of where Rhett sits, slouched over, and he lays a hand on his shoulder.

“I don’t think you’re a piece of shit,” he tells him. “I just think you’re kind of a shithead.”

Rhett snorts. “What’s the difference?”

“First one is a lost cause,” Wyatt says. “Second one is just an idiot trying to do his best. Like most of us.”

*****

Christmas day at a bachelor’s ranch is not as sad as it might seem.

Wyatt brings in a tree but they only throw some lights on it to give it a bit of cheer. They build a fire in the fireplace, exchange no gifts, settle in and watch the football games.

Christmas dinner is a pot of Wyatt’s ulcer-inducing chili and a pan of cornbread. Cecelia drops by in the morning with a plate of cookies and a handful of gifts for Rhett, but it’s just the two guys for most of the day.

Until you call to Facetime your uncle.

You take Rhett unawares; you call off-schedule. You usually call in the evening but this is the afternoon, and Wyatt mutes the football game and take the call from the couch. Rhett starts to stand up, but the man waves him to sit back down. No need to hide out like he usually does.

So Rhett gets a full accounting of your life from you directly. He can hear your voice, and you sound like you have a sore throat. You tell your uncle about your big rescue mission, how it’s bitterly cold in the city but how you’ve saved so many dogs, so many cats, and how you can’t wait to head back out after you warm up a bit.

“I just wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas,” you tell Wyatt. “I’m sorry I couldn’t be there.”

Your uncle glances over at Rhett, nods in his direction. “We’re doing okay for a couple of guys.”

“You decorate a tree?”

“Just string lights.”

“The prettiest part of a tree anyway. What about dinner?”

“Chili.”

You laugh, and the sound makes Rhett smile – when was the last time he heard it?

“Happy Birthday, Jesus. Here’s some indigestion,” you joke.

“Good thing the kid went to Costco and got a gallon bucket of Pepto,” Wyatt jokes back.

It draws another laugh, which makes Rhett laugh, which makes you stop and ask your uncle if Rhett is there too.

“He is,” Wyatt admits. “We’re watching the football game.”

There’s a beat of silence from you that seems to stretch out forever but is probably only a second or two.

“Merry Christmas, Rhett,” you say, and Wyatt hesitates, then tilts the screen so Rhett can see you and you can see him. He almost doesn’t want to look but he can’t help himself.

You’re smiling at him. Not as broadly as you usually smile when you’re delighted in something or someone, but it’s a medium-sized one that touches the corners of your eyes.

It’s genuine.

It’s a place to start. It’s a sliver of hope. It’s not a door slamming shut in his face but a door left ajar by a fraction, and maybe Rhett can toe it open if he can just find the right way to try and square things up with you. It’s confirmation that he’s not a piece of shit, just kind of a shithead, and if he tries his best, maybe that will be enough.

“Merry Christmas,” he replies, and if you notice the gruffness in his voice, you don’t react.

“Thanks.”

Wyatt holds his phone there a moment, starts to turn it back to him, but Rhett blurts out, “be careful out there, okay?” so Wyatt turns it back.

Your smile grows the barest bit. “Will do.” A pause. “Don’t let my uncle work you too hard.”

A toe in the door. A sliver of hope. The fire snaps in the fireplace and the string lights twinkle on the tree, and Rhett may be an idiot just trying his best, but maybe that’s enough.

“I barely work at all,” he jokes. “Gotta leave plenty of work for you when you come back.”

It makes you chuckle. It’s not a laugh, but it’s something.

Maybe trying his best will be enough.

117 notes · View notes

belladonnadawn · 21 hours ago

Text

Before you/After you

"I love you, it's ruining my life." As the future heir of Serulla, you have your mind set and path in order. But everything changed once you met him– Zaros. (What happened eight years ago) Zaros Kymen Atha'lin x Reader

Everything is set in place ever since you were born. The road that you're taking was taken before, the thought comforts other– but it cages you. Every moment and every step you take was for Serulla— they hold your present while you hold their future.

For you, the small talks are for formalities, the conversations are for information, and connections are for upper hand. You'd often glance at the ladies, with how they easily converse with one another. You'd quietly observe viscounts laugh with each other.

You would be lying if you said that you didn't want to find a connection like that. A conversation with no intent, a friendship without negotiations. You tried in the past, but to no avail. No one seems to scratch the surface, no one seem to try.

Academy seems to aid with your loneliness. The more work and tasks they gave, the less you have to ponder about whatever thought your mind can conjure. For a moment, it did not matter that you're the heir to the throne, nor you're alone.

You quickly adjusted to the academy, it helped that some of the topics and subjects interests you. Even if you're having a hard time with other subjects, you have mentors to guide you through. The life was monotonous, but somehow, you found comfort in that.

The cafeteria is bustling with students packed with their snacks and stories. Sounds of metal and glasses along with conversations and laughters filled the area. You wished that those noise would visit you often, but that is almost impossible.

"Is this seat occupied?" A blonde young man asked, tearing your attention away from your food. As you looked up at him, his eyes widened, recognizing you. There was the familiar look in his eyes, one that you're almost used to seeing in other people's faces.

"I apologize, I did not—"

"Please seat, it's alright," You quickly spoke. It was strange, but a part of you wants him to stay.

He sat down, a flicker of intimidation in his gestures. He was careful, as if waiting for judgement. You wanted to roll your eyes at how tense he is— it was almost ridiculous.

"What's your name?"

He looked at you, clearly taken aback by your question, "My name is Zaros, your grace. Zaros Kymen Atha'lin."

"Zaros, nice to meet you."

You held your hand out and to your relief, he accepted.

Somehow, life in the academy became bearable. The monotonous mundane life that you usually led became tolerable. Awkward lunches and small talk became comfortable silence as you continued to spend time with each other. It also helped that you share some classes with him.

The more you spend time with Zaros, the more you know him. Zaros is filled with dreams and aspirations. You can't help but admire his outlook in life. He was a breath of fresh air and it felt like you finally found what you were looking for.

"Once I finish studying, I'll make sure to apply what I learned in my community. Giving back what I can is the least I can do for the people who I grew up with," His eyes filled with hope and aspirations– almost as if he can grasp the dream that he longs for.

Your heart warmed at the sight knowing that he's few steps away from achieving what his heart wants.

"What about you?" Zaros stopped his steps, tilting his head as he tried to examine you.

"My dream is to lead Serulla with honor and integrity. I want to continue its legacy" You answered, dictating the same words ingrained in your brain ever since you were a child.

Zaros only tiled his head at the answer. "But what about your dream?"

You looked at him with surprise as he asked the question once more. This time, you knew what he meant.

"I want to see the world myself." The words flow freely from your mouth as you let your guard down to him for a bit.

Zaros held your hand, giving it a gentle caress, "What's stopping you?"

Serulla is a wonderful nation; the more you explored it the more you loved the place and the people. You can't help but thank Zaros for his guidance. He showed you places you haven't seen before, leading you to paths that you never thought you'd traverse.

You seized your free time with him, often advancing your studies and sneaking past the guards so you can explore the kingdom more. Both of you knew those moments were limited, but you made sure that it was worth it. You and Zaros became inseparable and you wouldn't have it the other way.

"Just close your eyes. Do not peek," Zaros continued to guide your steps as his hand covers your vision.

"Oh, please. If this is one of your tricks, I'm punching you," You chuckled, anticipation building up at his said surprise.

"It's none of that. You can trust me."

Zaros halted his steps and so did you as you finally arrived to your destination.

"I present you the most beautiful view in Serulla." As he removed his hand, your eyes finally adjusted to the view.

What welcomed you is a beautiful landscape showcasing the city. The view from here was high enough to make everything seem small and distant. Cold breeze gently touched your skin; as you inhale, you feel yourself floating– soaring the skies.

You glanced at the man beside you. His soft gaze made your heart beat faster, but you didn't mind. A soft smile plastered in your face made his smile widen.

Then you felt it: the warm feeling in your chest, the heat in your cheeks, and the security that you never felt around anyone but him.

Zaros placed his arm around your shoulder, "Did you like it?"

You leaned to his touch, not minding the physical contact. With a smile, you answered, "I love it."

People are intrusive and curious. You understood that it will never change, but it still irritated you.

Once people got caught wind of you and Zaros, rumors began to spread. Some are almost harmless, but most of them are ridiculous. Whenever you hear it, you can't help but roll your eyes. It did bothered you at first, but you learned how to pay no mind.

After the exam, unwinding is something that you looked forward to; the park was the perfect place for that. A soft sigh of relief escaped your lips as you felt the grass beneath you. Being confined in the halls made you appreciate the nature. You finally found a way to break free from things that was weighing you down.

Your eyes wandered at the lush surroundings: the fresh flowers, the beautiful butterflies, and the clear blue sky.

As you looked around, you felt as if you're being observed. To your disappointment, you saw a group from the academy, whispering to each other, giving you not-so-sublte glances. You tried to ignore them, but you found more and more people looking at you like a spectacle– exchanging words as if dissecting you right then and there.

Taking a deep breath, you focused in your surroundings once more, ignoring the feeling of their suffocating scrutiny. You are a public figure, get used to it. The words repeat in your head like a mantra, but it didn't help. Your clothes felt tighter, your heart beats faster, and everything around you feels smaller and sma—

"Ignore them," His voice seems to pull you awaw from your thoughts that you almost drowned you. As you gazed at him, the weighing feeling in your chest gradually fades.

"I know a spot," Zaros smiled, holding his hand out and you happily took it.

That moment, you knew that he knew you in a way that no one would.

"The academy seems to treat you well," Your mother spoke with a soft smile, carrying a hint of pride in her voice. Her presence always soothes you. She always carries this grace and elegance in her actions and words; it was those traits that made you admire her as a leader and a mother.

You nod, a small smile visible on your face as you recallled your life in the academy and with Zaros. Back then, it was the topic that you dreaded to talk about, but now it felt like a distant past.

"I'm seeing a new side of you. It makes me wonder if you're ready to take after me," She spoke with a hint of joke, her gentle hand tapped against your cheek. For a moment you did not see Queen Roena— you saw a mother gently scolding her child.

A chuckle escaped your lips, "I still have a long way to go, Mother. My studies are well taken care of and I am not falling behind," You spoke, trying to appease her.

"I understand, my dear. Your little tardiness and unruly behavior is just bothering me," A small sigh escaped her mouth. "Few years from now, you will hopefully rule Serulla. I expect responsibility and strong sense of duty."

"Mother, I was just having fun with a friend. I assure you my studies are still my priority," You insisted like a petulant child.

She held your hand, giving it a gentle squeeze as she looked at you, "I know, dear. As a mother, I advise you to be wise and careful. Trust is a gift not quickly given. Some people have different intentions."

You felt a cold coil in your stomach, not liking the direction where she was headed. It felt as if you knew what it was about— who it was about.

"Zaros, that is his name, right?"

You nodded, you wanted to open your mouth to defend him, but your mother immediately spoke.

"I apologize for intrusion. I know that you're growing up and being your own self, but I cannot help but worry about your current behavior and the rumors circulating around you and that man. Threats and dangers are everywhere, you have to be wary. Sometimes you need to listen to others, maybe they're seeing another perspective that you're blinded by."

A feeling of dread and hurt filled you at her implications. You're in another predicament once again, choosing between yourself and Serulla.

"Please, I speak to you as your mother. I cannot take another heartbreak, I cannot lose you," She caressed your cheek, her eyes filled with hurt as she recalled the distant past.

"Of course, mother. I will choose what is wise for us and Serulla." You spoke, cursing yourself as the words escaped your lips.

If you were able to condese the rumors that circulated, it will only boil you down to one thing:

The heir is a gullible fool, led astray by a traitor.

The future heir of Serulla is either a genuine dunce or seemingly a dunce. It was an insult to the ruler to raise someone as ignorant as you. You can't help but believe it. After all there's a thin line between losing your inhibitions and losing yourself.

You spent your days pondering about the rumors, considering your mothers words. Maybe they are right, maybe they saw something that you didn't. Gathering your resolve, you decided to face the possible truth. You have been led astray by him, it was now time to get your life back.

"Why did you befriend me?"

Zaros chuckled out of bewilderment, "That's a strange question."

"Just answer it," Your gaze sharp, catching him off guard. You saw him falter at your firm voice, leaving no room for friendly banter.

"Because I thought that we can be friends," Zaros spoke carefully, looking at you in the eyes, trying to figure you out. He could feel the tension filling the air– gone was the comfortable silence.

"Is that all?"

"You're asking as if you want to hear a specific answer."

"And if I do? Because it's strange how a person like you could take a liking in having a connection with me? Unless…" You glanced at him from head to toe.

"Unless what? Say it," His eyes daring, not leaving your gaze as he braced himself.

"Unless you're after something more valuable than friendship. Even others can see that."

Zaros' eyes widened, scoffing at your accusations, "Is that how think it is? After all the times you spent with me, you decided to believe them? That's preposterous." He let out a bitter chuckle.

"I am just considering their opinions. You can't blame me for being careful, especially with how desperate people can be," Your words venomous as you spoke.

"I may be 'desperate', but at least I am not a pathetic being whose worth is attached to a throne destined for them."

"Well, at least I am not desperate enough to intrude in someone's life!"

His jaw tenses as he clenched his fists, all the hint of the previous connection and bond gone in his face. "Maybe they were right. Maybe you're truly a fool. And if I am being honest, Serulla is doomed to fail under your guidanc—"

Silence filled the room after the loud sound of your palm making a hard contact in his cheek.

“You are a disgusting leech who won my trust, only to break me after. Knowing you is my greatest regret, I never want to see your face again.”

Before he could respond, you immediately left the scene.

As you walked down the hall, your chest felt tight and your mouth felt dry. You tried to ignore the stinging in your eyes, but before you can prevent it tears starts to well up.

You knew that there's no coming back after the words that you exchanged with each other. The bridge was burnt, you made your choice. Whether you'll truly regret what occured, you have yet to know.

Divider: Cafekitsune

#zsakuva #sakuverse #zsakuva zaros #zaros x reader

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latteenightss · 2 days ago

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Hii! Just another rant about obx. I wanna share my predictions about season 5 and what I think they’re gonna do

Chase Stokes (John B) mentioned that season 5 will be their best one, which it could be but I think for a lot of viewers just the fact that JJ won’t be there at all might ruin the season if yk what I mean.

And now to my predictions

1. I think season 5 will be Kiara’s season, with the way season 4 ended it’s obvious she’s gonna lash out and go through a lot. She’s gonna need to deal with grief and her revenge era might be a bit brutal 😊

Also maybe she will be somehow related to the treasure? Or just connected slightly. Like season 1 we had John B, season 2 it was Pope. Season 3 now- idk I guess Sarah but Kie also had a bigger role, like when that dude kidnapped her and then she got sent off to that camp but that’s it, then her plot line was about Jiara, and season 4 was obv JJ.

And since we’re talking about JJ, y’all.. ik it’s hard but he’s not coming back 😭 obx is not supernatural, a wish won’t bring him back to life. Like I don’t think JJ will crawl out of sand.

I generally love the idea of Kie finally having her main character moments and just making her more important to the story.

2. We will get Riara. And I definitely don’t mean that in a romantic way because that’s not happening! Madison (the actress of Kie) hates Riara 😭 but I think we will see them as duo and just get more of those tension scenes that we got so far. I feel like that might be a way the writers will try to “replace” Jiara. Jiara was a huge ad for the show and lately so has been Riara.

I feel like almost eveyone loves the tension between those two and the writers know that. Also Rafe breaking up with Sofia- yea they’re definitely building up to some sort of storyline with Kiara and Rafe. The amount of people obsessed with Riara is insane and obv they have to give us something so..

Riara s5 is pretty much guaranteed.

3. I wanna talk about Sarah and John B- obviously a huge plot line will be their child. I don’t know if the child will be born at the end or during season 5. How I see it, I’m leaning more toward the end but we’ll see.

There’s not much else that can really happen with them. John b will also be in a revenge era since his best friend was killed and Sarah will definitely get closer with Rafe, that hug they shared was so cute and needed but otherwise I really don’t know! I doubt they’ll kill them off. I was thinking that the way John B narrates obx maybe that’s him in the future telling his child about their story? That would make sense honestly.

4. Pope and Cleo umm so. I honestly am not as interested in their story line and it’s interesting because I have no idea what they will do with them.

I think Pope might be kind of more cold in season 5- as we know he shot a person right in the head, and he was so scared about that. Also he lost JJ- his best friend and they want to send him to the military. Dude is not doing the best! 💀

Cleo.. I don’t know she’s such a complicated character, she went through a lot in her life but I doubt they’ll really expand her character in season 5.

5. Rafe!!!! His character development this season was insane. In my opinion he should stick with the pogues but I wouldn’t be surprised if he somehow betrayed them. That’s Rafe- he’s not a good person but I wouldn’t say he’s necessarily bad..

Like I already said in obx 5 there will be Rafe and Kie duo, and more of Sarah and Rafe for sure. But maybe he will connect with the other pogues too.

I just don’t want the development to be thrown away, I hope they make him stick with the pogues.

6. And now finally the ending/possible deaths.

The characters who in my opinions are most in danger are: Kiara and Rafe

Especially Kiara.. here’s the thing, since JJ is dead and she already went through the whole group 😭 what can her ending actually be? Like ok she could just end up alone with her friends, her family but in my opinion her death would make sense. She would be with JJ and I think in general it is a good end for her.

Rafe like i mentioned is a complicated character, it would be so easy for the writers to just kill him off at the end. But I would be honestly so mad!!! Like no JJ and no Rafe 😭. Yeah I don’t want them to do that but at the same time, I think there’s definitely a possibility.

Sarah and John B definitely safe in my opinion.

Cleo and Pope- now I don’t know, I think they’re safe. Maybe Cleo.. but still I don’t think so.

Groff- definitely done for! ❤️ I hope Kiara tortures him to death 🥰

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tokyo-daaaamn-ji-gang · 2 days ago

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what would a meeting between izana, emma and shin in the afterlife be like? would shin be able to forgive izana given what he did to mikey in the bad future and in the tenjiku arc?

Going for his tenjiku timeline death, athough what he put Mikey through would be an issue, I actually think his role in Emma's death would be the bigger issue here. Emma is a very caring and understanding person, so I think she would be able to understand why Izana did the things he did and that it wasn't fully his fault. But I think it would take a long time for her to actually forgive him for it, he did have a big role in cutting her life short after all. I think Shinichiro would be just sad with it all, he just wanted his siblings to be reunited but instead one had a role in killing another then died as well and one is all alone. So I think he'd mainly just be sad about how everything turned out and I could see him blaming himself a lot rather then Izana. Seeing it as his responsibility to protect his siblings and feeling like he failed at it, then there's the whole curse aspect too. And then there's Izana, I'm not sure Izana would've forgiven himself either, especially for Emma's death, he'd likely feel pretty guilty seeing her again. I do think they'd all eventually work through it together but it would take a lot.

#tokyo revengers #tokrev #tokyo rev #tokyo revengers spoilers #izana kurokawa #sano shinichiro #emma sano

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bidisasterevankinard · 7 hours ago

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The only hope i have rn is that as with kiss break up was just a shock plot twist that is going to be explained later. As you might remember 7x3 gave us almost nothing to really believe bucktommy will happen (not talking about me who was already all in my "tuck (I called bt that that time) is happening guys". And then next episode till Buck is kissed by Tommy we are led to believe Buck is jealous about Eddie. The kiss was a shock, till the moment they started to move close, but even then. We didn't really expect it to happen. It was like BOOM. And then the episode ended and interviews were all like "yeah Buck is finally bi". And ga were really surprised, and some of them were homophobic ofc, some were just really surprised Buck is into men. Since when?. And then more explanation and answer to that question and exploring happened only next episode. The explanation on the screen, not in interviews that ga more likely do not read, that it's actually NEW to Buck, that he never thought he's into men before Tommy

So rn i kinda hope it's the same with break up. It was the shock that would be explained later, in the next two episodes, tho I'm not sure if it will lead to bt make up or not

At least I hope they'll end it better, give Buck actually say I'm bisexual and say either good bye to Tommy, but firstly admitting he is in love with him, even if it will happen not to Tommy's face, or him chosing to go and get his man saying it to Tommy. 911 never does cliffhangers tho Wendell died in 6x9 and Bobby was looking in his death only in the next part of the season. so hope is here that maybe they'll end the middle finale after emergencies, when they show us how they leave out characters before 3-4 months time jump in montage, that Buck is knocking at the door that Tommy opens, and Buck says "you're wrong about me. I can see our future not because I'm so excited that I understood I'm bisexual because of you, but because I love you. I don't need anyone else. But if you can't see our future then ok, tell me to go home. And I'll do it. But stop being coward and just run without explanation. I, as Abby did, deserve it". Black screen

Boom again. Fandom runs around speculating that will happen, and you don't need to write all fix it of 8x6. Just show in another part that:

a) bucktommy are actually talk and not the shit that they showed that apparently they never talked that Tommy is gay and Buck (possibly bc you can enjoy watching smt and not play it) hates basketball

b) Buck sees Tommy's flaws.

And you can do what you want with their progression as a couple. Or ok if you still don't want bt you can make one scene where Buck says that he's boyfriend said they can't be together. But it at least will give everyone closure

#bucktommy #evan buckley #911 #911 abc #tommy kinard

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zaynelusmusings · 3 days ago

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Winter's surprisingly warm in September

Synopsis: M/C loves Zayne, and Zayne loves M/C. They spend a week away in a quiet cottage to celebrate Zayne's birthday. Zayne is thankful, yet he cannot truly express it in the way he wants to but he finds a way.

Word Count:c2.5k

Warning/s: None, just good ol' fluff hehe.

Note: I had initially posted this on A03 for Zayne's birthday but had only gotten around to proofreading it and making some changes. If there are any other grammatical mistakes welp sorry call it a rebellion against the coloniser's language lmfaooo.

______________________________________________________________

Zayne is not a cold and indifferent man, he really is not. It is simply that his bashful grins and crinkles beside his eyes are solely reserved for one. Locked and kept away for years on end - he had known for just as long that she had held the key. It was merely a test of his patience and trust in fate that she had taken her time to realise her ownership.

His passive face is one that she and everyone else have grown accustomed to, so it warms her to no end when he spoils her with his boisterous laughter and endless affection. She likes it though (almost feels selfish too sometimes) yet the fact that this side of him is reserved solely for her? She treasures it like an intimate secret, the honourable one he’d chosen to bear witness to his most vulnerable moments and parts. As beautiful as the raw Zayne is, a protective lover she is - she’d close the blinds at anyones else’s attempt to steal a peek at her treasure trove.

It is snowing, and Zayne looks right at home. Sure, it is a little on the nose, with his Evol being ice after all. But he is beautiful, the green in his eyes the perfect apology for the lack of leaves, all fallen as nature dances into the cold season. She wonders sometimes, if he realises that every part of his body and character sung symphonies and wrote poetry illustrating nature’s best work. A crimson shade has found home across his cheeks, a little due to the cold, many due to her unbashful flirtation. She loves complimenting him and is very well aware that she does it a lot, but she likes to think of it as making amends for all of the time lost from forcing the distance between themselves from each other.

It was a funny yet regretful story that she would hope to tell their future children. About how she went so long bearing the weight of forcing her true feelings to the side out of fear of rejection from him? A seasoned hunter in combat she was, but even the bravest soldiers lack the courage to bear vulnerability.

As frustrating fate can be sometimes, it can also be sweet. She had determined that her and Zayne are fated to be together - a little cliche - the Doctor who heals, and the reckless hunter who gets hurt. But as puzzle pieces go, opposing shapes are the best pair. Hence, despite their feeble attempts to stay away from each other, it was always fated that they would end up together anyway. Despite, despite, despite.

Despite how a chief cardiac surgeon and a hunter’s schedules would never compliment one another. Despite the fact he still hasn’t found a cure for her heart condition (and it pains him to no end after each working day of research that leads to nowhere, so much so that he feels unworthy to be sleeping in the same bed as her at night). Despite the fact that he isn’t able to tell her that he loves her. (He does, very much so.)

Despite betraying Astra to love her, only to be punished for doing so.

But reasons of despite were set aside this weekend, the swirls of adoration and awe crystal clear in her eyes as she watches Zayne pet the black stray cat and welcome it into their lodging - a quaint cottage by the mountains. Nestled near the fireplace, she watches quietly as the raven haired doctor brushes snow off the feline’s fur, his voice an octave higher as he coos at the cat. The black cat, one that Zayne muses has the same mannerisms as his lover, nuzzles its head thankfully against his warm and large palm. The faint buzz of its purr is telling of the cat’s fondness of Zayne. Well, it seems like this gentle and loving side of him is reserved for two now.

“Found him underneath the bench outside,” Zayne chuckles as it begins to knead its wet paws on his trousers, but he paid no mind to the now soiled material. “Three’s not a crowd, right?” He briefly glances at her, still a little distracted by the cat.

She watches it all, and feels it in her chest. The way her heart races, the tingle in her fingers as she clutches the material of her knit sweater - Zayne is too good to be true. She swears she physically feels the atoms of love form within her chest, and her discipline wears thin soon enough as she makes her way over to the raven haired pair by the front door.

“Not at all, as long as he’s okay with sharing Doctor Zayne with me.” Folding her legs, she also begins petting the cat, and the purring grows impossibly louder. They both laugh, and he feels his heart squeeze too. He could not ask for more, no. His lover, a warm purring companion and a fireplace. Santa had packaged and wrapped up his gift in this quaint cottage. Zayne immediately says a prayer of gratitude, a pang of panic and fear attempting to whisper distractions into his brain. But Zayne wills them away, he refuses to give into the possibility (or as the narrator of his life would call ‘inevitability’) of losing her and the heartbreak that will follow suit - not tonight anyway.

In an ideal world, this is the life he would be able to live everyday. They’d both be married, and he’d come home to a cat and her. It’d be cold outside, but it’d be warm inside. Zayne doesn’t think he’s asking for much, too. Home could just be four walls, and a symphony made of their combined laughter and their cat’s purrs would be the only song he’d have playing on the vinyl.

In this world of reality, they’d be back to the status quo. Zayne would be ending a day of surgeries with at least three hours of research (that would still lead to more disappointing revelations) and she would be deep in quarantine zones fighting wanderers. (Her occupation does nothing, maybe only worse things for his anxiety for her safety and health) It is then another four days of yearning and rounds of nervous regulations before he has her safe and sound in his arms again. He’ll have the kettle of green tea freshly brewed for her in the kitchen, her (his) favourite worn our Akso Hospital staff t-shirt and cotton shorts laid out on the bed, and the new crime documentary about the case she hasn’t stopped babbling about ready to go on the television screen.

Reality isn’t bad at all though, he thinks. Any reality with her in it is one worth sacrificing for.

“Hm, are you saying you’d be okay with sharing? I remember the sigh you gave me when I asked for a bite of your dessert.” He teases her, pressing a kiss against her cold cheek. The chilliness of her skin makes him frown immediately, and he stands up carefully, pulling him with her. The softness in his eyes fade a little, worry glazing them instead. “You’re cold. You should get under the covers in the bedroom. I’ll get the heater going.” Nothing gets him back into the stern and moody character than his worry for her. He plays around with different reasons as to why, but it is exceptionally hard for him to see her cold, especially. (It’s because in some other world, he freezes her as an act of retribution for her attempts to steal the Creatio Protocore.)

Everyone loves their Evol, humans were always encouraged to celebrate their unique types of Evols - but not Zayne. Perhaps it was because he still hasn’t figured out how to control it the same way everyone else is capable of doing so. The ice, though woven in his DNA, is never truly his companion - only a fair-weathered friend who has more loyalty to Astra than to him. He’s well familiar with the freezing pain caused by his own Evol. The same freezing pain he has to endure, enough to make him nauseous to think if even a hint of it was felt by his beloved. So, in this world, he usually settles for this reason as to why he simply cannot stand seeing her cold.

Sighing, she slides her arms around his waist, her red nose nuzzling against the thick material of his sweater. “It’s snowing outside, of course I’m a little cold. But I’m okay, I was just waiting for you.” Her voice is muffled against his clothes, her nose scrunching as the fibres of his sweater tickles her skin. Slowly, his shoulders relax, though the frown on his face stubbornly stays. He sighs, but wraps his arms around her shoulders. “Thank you for waiting for me. We should get in bed now.”

And so they do. Nestled underneath the thick blanket, Zayne exudes the opposite of his Evol. He is a man of warmth, her own personal furnace as she continues to nuzzle herself closer against her lover. A familiar thought intrudes her brain, he is too good to be true.

Little does she know, Zayne feels the same way. Despite the complex lore of their story and compounded complication of their fates, Zayne knows one thing - he loves truly and deeply. True to his Evol, the icy terrors are already covering his skin as soon as he begins to form the intention of rolling a syllable of the three words off his tongue.

Astra was a being that Zayne has grown to hate, yet knows that he would still get on his knees in gratitude for their mercy upon him for he is still able to show his affection for her with little to no consequences. He’ll take anything, anything at all. A prized possession like her, the exact molecules that both the sun and moon are made of – oh to be graced by her presence, it is more than enough reason for him to pilgrim Astra’s both heaven and hell.

“Thank you for bringing me here,” his voice barely a whisper as his arms naturally pull her closer against his chest, their blushing noses meeting for a brief moment. “This is truly a birthday I will remember for the rest of my life.” He speaks so earnestly that it causes a flip in his own stomach, his own body physically reacting to the profound feeling of love in his chest.

“Thank you for letting me celebrate your birthday with you.” She knew that Zayne had never truly celebrated his birthday, and the fact broke her heart. While she also knew that it was not necessarily something Zayne got upset over, the fact being of his own scheduling faults too, it was a habit she wanted to break. She’d spent everyday celebrating this man if she could, and the day Earth was graced of this kind and selfless man was not a day she planned to take lightly. Hence, after pulling some strings and endless communication with his colleagues at work, here they are.

She feels the emotions bubble up in her once again, unknowingly causing a jerk reaction of her fingers to clench around the material of his sweater and she whimpers. With furrowed brows and an immediate worry, Zayne gushes out, “What’s wrong? Is your heart in pain?”

Shaking her head immediately to soothe his worries, she releases her grip on his sweater promptly as her cold fingers gently caress the smooth skin of his face.

“Zayne,” she begins, her voice laced with shyness.

“My love.. If it hurts, you must let me know.” She feels his grip on her waist tighten ever so slightly. “It’s not my heart. I’m okay, I promise.” Biting on the flesh of her lower lip, her eyes darted down to his own plump ones. Her impulse wins, and she presses a chaste kiss onto his lips. Sighing, she rests her forehead against his and feels his body relax soon after. “I love you, Zayne.”

It isn’t not a profound confession, it was something she knew that he knew. But she also is aware of his condition, and the curse of it all that prevents him from saying it back.

It truly doesn’t matter to her though, because a lover like Zayne would never make her doubt his true feelings for her. Through his gentle caresses, the separate kettle of green tea that he brews her (despite the fact that he likes coffee, and she doesn’t), the safe late night rides back to her apartment after her long hunting days (and his very own long night of surgical procedures) – she knew that he loves her.

She feels his eyes flutter open, a pained look in her green orbs. Swirls of guilt are evident in his green orbs and though this look would have fooled people into thinking he was guilty for not feeling the same way, she knew that it was because he couldn’t repeat the sentiments.

“Shh, It’s okay.” She shakes her head, pressing yet another kiss to his now trembling lips. “I love you, Zayne. I’m not saying it because I need to hear it back. I’m saying it because that’s how I feel. I’m telling you, Zayne.” Her voice shakes against her will. “I love you, Zayne. I want you to know that I love you. I want to tell you that I love you.”

“And I don’t need to hear it back. I know you do.” Her fingers move to the back of his head, as they comb gently through his raven locks. “I don’t want to not say it, just because you can’t say it. I love you, Zayne.”

It isn’t the first time she has said it either, but definitely is one of very few times, considering their situation. She wishes to change this fact, because a man like him deserves to be showered with love. The grip on her waist tightens, and she swears she hears him let out a whimper before his lips crashes against hers.

“Thank you.” He whispers, voice wavering ever so slightly (but she doesn’t miss it), and he moves impossibly closer to her. “I love you too.”

It is now her turn to be in panic, yet before she could even protest, he continues despite the wince on his face, the thin layer of ice already beginning to form on the side of his neck. “But more importantly, I live for you.” He confesses through a pained voice. “This curse, or whatever pain life may bring me, I promise to live for you. So that I can take care of you.” He blows air out of his mouth as he awaits for the ice to melt away - and it seems like Astra beared mercy this time - it does so quickly enough under her touch.

He smiles tiredly as the pain fades, nudging her nose with his own. “I live for you.” He repeats, and immediately, she understands what it exactly means.

Because it will hurt - he knows that. The curse is a curse that he knows would not ever be retracted. Despite the exhaustion that plights him, despite the fate of pain written in his destiny, he lives for her.

“I love you.” She whispers.

“I live for you.” He echoes.

Author's note: Anyway it's been like 927492 years since I had tumblr so I started this blog anew!!I've been creeping on here to satiate my LNDS cravings so I thought I'd join the fun lol. Pls enjoy and feel free to send in requests/prompts (I am in my 20s but I refuse to write smut lol)

#zayne #zayne fluff #love and deepspace #love and deepspace zayne #love and deepspace writing #love and deepspace one shot #love and deepspace zayne fluff #lnds zayne #zayne x reader #love and deepspace mc

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