#but I don’t need an audience I just need the world to know I’m right
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janamensch · 3 months ago
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Ilmera knight OC!!! This is Ser Valerie, she’s a knight errant from the Suncrest Isles!
#oc#my ocs#altheya#altheyatde#Ser Valerie#Anybody want to make Altheya knight OCs together#I didn’t get the chance to make a spellclash oc last time but I love Ilmera and knights so here’s Valerie#She would be that knight handing out roses to a pretty face in the audience at tournaments#Also btw she’s very interested in learning about culture from other continents#and has lots of blood#and is free on thursday if any ossean ambassadors happen to be in the area just by the way#Since we don’t know much about the Suncrest Isles and knightly orders in general yet I’m not sure what sort of knight she’s aspiring to be#It would be fun if she was trying to become a knight for one of the bronze dragon nobles#If that’s the case I’d want her to be a drakewarden ranger because that subclass sounds really fun#But if not then she’d just be a hunter subclass ranger i think#And she’d want to join a knightly order that focusses on chivalry and slaying monsters and rescuing young maidens (gender neutral) etc etc#basic knight stuff you know#But also just spreading joy and beauty and flowers and making world a prettier nicer place to live I guess#<- basic Jana OC stuff you know#Anyway what else is there I need to tell about her#Oh right she’s got the druidcraft cantrip so she can hand out a flower to everyone she meets :)#And also the thorn whip cantrip because it fits her aesthetic perfectly#and I think it’d be really useful since her fighting style focuses on duelling so that way her opponent can’t just run away#and fighting spellcasters becomes easier because thorn whip can pull opponents towards you
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flwrkid14 · 22 days ago
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Casual Chaos: Tim Drake’s Makeup Stream
Danny, known to the internet as Nebula, had been teasing a special stream for weeks. Fans were buzzing with excitement and theories, especially when the announcement popped up: “Doing My Boyfriend’s Makeup!” Naturally, the chat erupted into chaos. Danny was pretty private about his love life, so this reveal had the fandom on edge.
When the stream finally went live, Danny greeted his audience with his usual laid-back grin. “Okay, today’s the day. Let’s see if I’m any good at this,” he said, spinning a makeup brush between his fingers. “But first, let me introduce you to my boyfriend.”
The camera panned, and there he was—Tim Drake, sitting there as if this was the most normal thing in the world. No big introduction, no fanfare. Just Tim, giving a small, nonchalant wave.
“WAIT. IS THAT TIM DRAKE???”
“Like… THE Tim Drake??”
“No way he’s dating Nebula, what is happening???”
Danny, fully aware of the chaos brewing in the comments, didn’t even acknowledge it. He just turned to Tim. “Ready for your makeover, babe?”
Tim shrugged, totally calm. “Let’s do it.”
As Danny started applying makeup, the chat kept freaking out, but the two of them acted like it was just another Saturday. In Gotham, though, it was a different story. The Bat's group chat was blowing up:
Dick: “TIMOTHY JACKSON DRAKE-WAYNE, EXPLAIN YOURSELF.”
Jason: “How does a nerd like you land Nebula of all people???”
Steph: “I AM CRYING. HOW DID I NOT KNOW THIS?!!”
Damian: “This is unacceptable. Drake, I demand an explanation.”
Bruce: [Typing…]
But Tim? Unfazed. He ignored the constant buzzing of his phone and sat still as Danny carefully lined his eyes and added a touch of mascara, keeping up casual chatter with the stream.
“You know,” Danny said, holding up a shade of lipstick, “Tim’s got this effortless model thing going on. I’m just enhancing what’s already there.”
Tim raised an eyebrow, smirking. “I didn’t exactly sign up to be your runway star.”
“Wait… he’s actually REALLY pretty??”
“Tim Drake is hot, confirmed.”
“LOOK AT HIS CHEEKBONES OMG.”
As Danny finished the look, adding some extra blush and a light gloss, the reaction was immediate. The chat was losing it. Tim glanced at himself in the mirror, barely reacting. “Well… I don’t hate it.”
Danny leaned back, admiring his work. “Not bad, right?”
Meanwhile, back in Gotham, the bats were still going wild.
Steph: “Tim, you better show up to every gala looking like this from now on.”
Jason: “You’ve been holding out on us with this face, man.”
Dick: “This is ICONIC.”
Bruce: “We’ll need to discuss this later.”
Tim finally glanced at his phone and snorted at all the messages. “They’re never going to let this go, are they?”
Danny just grinned at the camera. “Probably not. So… next time, you'll do my makeup, right?”
The chat, of course, exploded all over again.
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dreamchasernina · 9 months ago
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So I had to stop on episode 6. Gonna continue watching tonight. I just have one thing to say so far. People think a good adaptation is the one that follows the story of the original. It’s not. It’s the characters. The characters are the ones that made the original so good. And none of them are as fleshed out here. You cannot seriously tell me the katara you see in the original is the one you see in the live action.
The writers decided to take the struggle and the growth of the characters away. I’m on episode 6. So far, Aang had everything come so easy to him, he didn’t struggle at all. Kyoshi fought for him at Kyoshi island. He enters the spirit world so easily, he finds Roku so freaking fast, he immediately knows Hei Bai is the spirit of the forest, out of nowhere. He learns absolutely nothing through those 6 episode. I could talk for hours about how that scene with Gyatso was a cop out. Why should their main character suffer right? He shouldn’t. So they just make up a scene where Aang meets Gyatso and he just outright tells him there’s nothing he could have done so he shouldn’t feel guilty.
The OG never had that scene. Because the OG knew the audience was smart enough to realize it themselves. There was nothing Aang could have done if he hadn’t run away, he would have died. But Aang needs to realize this himself, he needs to confront his feelings, learn from his mistakes, forgive himself and move on. But these days, writers don’t want their characters going through a journey, nope, the characters are just perfect, from the beginning to end.
Same said for Zuko. The writers apparently decided to make him softer, have higher morals, not as angry or determined, because that would make Zuko complex and interesting. He was good at heart in the OG show too, but he was spoiled and angry and violent. He’s none of that here, he’s gentle and respectful to everyone and just wants to capture the avatar, but not too much though. Zuko doesn’t even give everything he has to capture Aang, he doesn’t hire pirates, he doesn’t hire June himself (Iroh has to convince him to do it), he doesn’t follow Aang into the fire nation, you don’t feel his desperation, his determination, just how much he wants to go home. How could his journey feel interesting when we don’t see the dramatic shift in his character? The most interesting character in the show is not as ineteresting when he doesn’t go from a spoiled angry hurt teenager to an honorable smart and compassionate young man.
Yes, the story is fine, the visuals are nice, but it’s all very surface level. Everything is just flat.
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aliteralsemicolon · 4 months ago
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Wait until you like me again - 18+
See part 1 | Part 2 of We can't be friends (wait for your love) | See part 3
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The decision to resign puts a lot of weight on your shoulders. A takedown gone wrong makes it the least of anyone's concerns, especially Spencer’s. You’re not willing to let him back in; it feels too little, too late.
Spencer Reid X Fem! Reader
DISCLAIMER This story is NSFW and contains graphic depictions. It is intended for mature audiences only, minors do not interact!  You are responsible for the content you consume. Make sure to read all necessary warnings. Please remember this is a work of fiction; if you don’t like it, don’t read. Part 2 was highly requested and I’m sorry it’s taken so long to finish.
WARNING Panic attack mentioned, slight PTSD depictions, drugs (GHB), Case details (very poorly thought out). Violence: canon typical - strangulation, drugging, guns/gunshots. Proceed at your own risk.
Word count: 10.3K See notes at end for authors note & spoilers.
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The most annoying part about making a decision in haste is the clarity of the situation when the dust settles. It’d taken Hotch just over two minutes to message you after you’d sent your email. 
From: Boss Man 🕶 👔 My office, first thing tomorrow. 
You didn’t take into account that you’d have to explain your sudden resignation to your unit chief, or that you’d need to think of a good enough goodbye to lessen the hurt of abandoning your friends. These are people you consider your found family; you’re leaving behind years worth of bonds with no proper warning or closure, in a measly few weeks. Your reasoning had to be good enough to convince them that this was for the best. 
To convince you that this was for the best. 
You’d spent the whole night in tears, racking your brain for an excuse, because ‘the person you care most about in this world and unrequited love of your life telling you that he didn’t want to see your face was a pathetic reason for discarding your life’s work. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t think of adequate justification. Even as the sun rose and you made your way through your pre-work routine, nothing came to mind. 
“You can’t love me.”
Any time you tried to conjure up a defence your thoughts would wander back to Spencer. Too many words had been exchanged between you and your former best friend in the span of four months and not a single one of them properly explained why he was so butt-hurt. He loves you too much, but doesn’t want you to love him? That’s your understanding, at least. 
“Please don’t come back here. It’s hard enough at work, I don’t want to see your face in my personal time too.” 
Since you’d left his apartment the previous night, you’d been cycling through all the stages of grief in record time. Spencer once told you that people tend to remember more negative memories than positive. He was right. You couldn’t recall a lot of your happier memories with him. All you could think about was the two conversations where he’d hurt you in ways you never imagined he would. 
You’re not sure exactly what part of you snapped at that moment, all you knew was that you were done making him the centre of your universe. Spencer Reid played no part in your decisions moving forward. He was not the reason for your departure with the BAU, a lie you made sure to relay to Hotch during your meeting with him.
“I’m just surprised, that’s all. Where is this even coming from?” He inquired from across you, hands folded neatly against his desk.
“I just think it’s time for me to try new things, you know?” It was a pathetic excuse, but less pathetic than the actual reasoning. 
“I try not to interfere with the personal lives of the team, but this is just so…sudden. I have to wonder if this has to do with Spencer?”
“This has nothing to do with him.” You go out of your way to avoid saying his name, suspecting you might taste poison. 
Hotch’s brow raises, as if his brain has been alerted to key information, head marginally tilting to the side like it does when he catches a lie. He doesn’t say anything, eyes narrowing in on you in stoic fashion. You feel like a petulant child that’s about to receive a scolding from their father. 
“Hon–Honestly…Hotch, I just–”
Three rapid knocks cut you off, the door to the office swinging open without waiting for a reply. 
“Sir, Hello, I’m sorry to interrupt but it’s an emergency. That case we were consulting on for Anchorage PD?” Garcia bursts into the room, slightly discoloured and more panicked than normal. “Well, five more bodies were discovered. Two of them pre-date who we initially thought was the first victim.”
“Garcia, tell everybody to meet on the jet ASAP. We’ll debrief on the flight.” Hotch orders abruptly standing from his seat. “You and I can finish this meeting later. This case is now our top priority, wheels up.” 
Emily, Rossi and Derek were already in their seats when you boarded. You secured your go bag in one of the overhead compartments and temporarily took a seat next to Derek. 
“How bad do you think this one is gonna be?” Derek sighs, dreading the horrors that await your arrival. 
“We’re up to thirty six bodies and counting. Whoever this unsub is, they’ve been at it a while. So, bad.” You answer honestly. 
“Speaking of bad, is everything okay?”
“That was not even remotely smooth.” You scoff. 
“I’m just asking as a concerned friend.” He shoots his hands up in defence.
“What happened to the days where we at least tried to mind our business. You know, at least asked each other about our weekend plans before jumping into interrogation mode.” You roll your eyes and smirk. 
“Heyyy, woah– no one’s interrogating anyone.” Derek chuckles. “What are your plans for the weekend?”
It wasn’t long before everybody had made their way on the jet, Spencer being the last one. You didn’t notice his arrival, too engulfed in your conversation. He definitely noticed you though. The sound of your giggles caught his attention the second he was in ear shot. He didn’t like how warm he felt at the sight of your smiling face. What he disliked more was that he could instantly tell that it wasn’t a genuine smile. 
He quietly made his way to his self assigned seat on the couch, trying his hardest to focus on anything but you. Every laugh that Morgan coaxed out of you bothered him. Spencer’s agony only ended once the jet had successfully taken off. 
“Alright let’s get started.” Hotch declared and everybody moved to gather around. 
With all the details laid out by Garcia through the monitor, everybody began stating facts and suggestions. You wrapped up soon enough and retreated to an isolated seat in the back of the jet. It was an almost eight hour flight, seven of which you were planning to use to come up with a solid plan to announce your departure. Life always has to throw a wrench in your plans though, because the lack of sleep from the night before caught up to you and you dozed off almost immediately. Had you any energy left in your body, you might have been privy to the eyes that were on you. 
“She didn’t say anything as to what the meeting was about?” JJ hushedly pries from her raven haired co worker in the cramped kitchenette.  
“No, but Garcia said that ‘the air in his office was really tense’.” Emily relays, her fingers mimicking quotation marks. “Did Hotch say anything?”
“No. He just gave me his usual dry look and told me to focus on the case.” JJ rolls her eyes at the thought and leans back against the counter. 
Despite being the FBI’s most decorated task force, the agents of the BAU weren’t strangers to workplace gossip. You’d just entered the bullpen this morning when Hotch frantically summoned you to his office, not even giving you time to set your things down at your desk. Witnessing the events sparked a guessing game sparked amongst the team. 
“Is it something we should know about?” Sitting across from Hotch, even Rossi succumbed to his curiosity. 
“Dave you’re not normally one to pry.” Hotch smirks, keeping his eyes on the case-file laid out in front of him. 
“No I’m not. But with the events of the past few months...” Rossi sips his coffee, staring at his younger superior expectantly. “...there’s been some talk Aaron.”
“Talk?” Hotch meets Rossi’s eyes.
“Mhm.” Rossi nods. “Apparently you’re transferring one of our two youngest members because they haven’t been able to put their differences aside.”
“I’m not transferring anyone. Where did this come from?” The alarm in his tone makes Rossi snicker.
“Office drama. You know how it is. And while you may not be transferring anybody,” he sets his mug down and looks towards where you’re sound asleep. “I’m guessing somebody is leaving. Hence this morning's meeting.”
“We’re not supposed to profile each other, you know.” Hotch sighs. “I’d appreciate it if you could keep this contained. I haven’t had a chance to properly discuss this with her yet and I think she’d prefer to break the news herself.” 
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As you had predicted the case was by no means an easy one. On the first day everybody was split into groups to follow up with the M.E, victims’ families and examine the crime scenes. All the evidence and information gathered wasn’t enough to narrow the profile any more than the generic: male, mid thirties to early forties, hates women. You were now three days in with no viable leads. 
You were especially frustrated because you felt that you weren’t working as well as you could. The stress of your announcement was taking its toll, you were unable to properly converse with your team out of guilt. Hotch sent everyone back to their hotel rooms with the idea that you would start fresh tomorrow. Normally you would room with Spencer, but lately JJ and Emily have been taking turns rooming with both of you. This time you were with Emily.
“I think this may be the first night we’ve gotten to turn in early.” Emily yawns as she dramatically stretches her limbs.
“I’m just glad we got to turn in at all, for a while there it looked like we may have to pull another all nighter.” You force a giggle, exasperated.  
“You okay?” She doesn’t miss a beat, taking the opportunity to ask about your uneasiness. 
“Yeah, fine.” You smile, but it doesn’t quite reach your eyes. 
“You’re going to snap at some point, you know?” She examines your closed off posture, trying to figure out a way to get you to open up. “Something’s clearly wrong. Talk to me.”
“We’re all on edge right now. It’s this case.” You hope that you’re being convincing enough. 
“It's more than that. You’ve been distant from everybody.” Emily briefly thought back to the Ian Doyle debacle, recognising all the signs of somebody preparing to run away at any given moment. 
“I’m aware that I’m not working to my full potential–”
“That’s not what I mean and you know that.” She steps closer to you. “I can’t force you to tell me whatever’s actually on your mind, but I would really appreciate it if you would. I hate seeing you so…detached. Not just from us, but from yourself.”
It’s the empathy in her voice instead of the usual sympathy that finally cracks you. Tears pool your eyes and you sink to the floor. Emily sits down next to you without a word. She tries to pull you in for a hug but you push away. 
“Please don’t.” You sob. “I’m sorry.”
She squeezes your knee to relay that she understands and retracts her hand. Your discomfort with physical touch was another thing you had in common with Spencer. It was just a personal preference for you, unlike his germophobia. He was the only person you were actually comfortable with in terms of touch, but you couldn’t fault others for not respecting that boundary when you’d never verbalised it. 
“I’ve been trying to figure out the right way to tell you guys, but I don’t think there’s any way this gets easier.” You recompose yourself after a moment. “I’m, um, leaving.”
You expect her to get upset with you, but find her unfazed. 
“You don’t look surprised.” 
“Well it’s not entirely surprising. I mean given everything that’s happened.” 
“So you’re not mad?”
“Why would I be mad?” She leans back with her mouth slightly open. 
“Because I feel like I’m abandoning you guys.” You heavily exhale. 
“You’re not abandoning us. You’re doing what you feel is right for you. I mean, am I happy about it? Definitely not. But I know better than anyone why you feel like you need to do this. And it’s not a decision you have to justify to anybody.” Emily reassures you. 
“How do I tell everybody else?” You push for more advice.
“However you feel most comfortable doing it. It doesn’t have to be some big announcement. You can casually break it to them whenever you get the opportunity. They’ll understand.” 
“Thank you, Em.” You genuinely smile this time, eternally grateful that she’s managed to take some pressure off your shoulders.
“Now while you’re in a mood to share…if you wanna talk about something else–” She attempts one last time to get you to talk about Spencer, sensing that the mood lightened a bit. 
“Nice try.” You laugh as you rise to your feet, offering your arms out to her to help her stand.
The following two days were a lot easier on you, mentally. You took Emily’s advice and disclosed your news individually to each team member, each of them more understanding than you’d anticipated. You were surprised to learn that Rossi was already aware, assuming that it came with being a profiler for as long as he had. Derek and JJ did try to talk you out of it initially, but accepted your decision in the end. You still had to talk about this with Garcia, but felt a lot more at ease with mostly everybody knowing.
Except Spencer.
That thought lingered in the back of your mind. You still love him, it’s not something you can just turn off. You shake it off and divert your full attention to the case. Four more bodies had been discovered and with them, a new pattern to the killings. The unsub was devolving. You and Spencer were the only ones at the precinct when the last murder was called in. Meaning you were stuck working on the geographical profile with him while the others were out chasing new leads. 
Realistically, only one of you was needed to build the profile and decided you were going to let him do it. You quietly sat in the furthest seat possible, trying to make yourself invisible and hoping that this would keep him busy enough to not talk to you. The whole week, you hadn’t uttered a single word to him unless it was absolutely necessary for the case. It was as if he didn’t exist, even if he was standing right infront of you. Spencer, on the other hand, spent the whole week prodding you for any reaction he could get. Anytime you made suggestions and he happened to be in the area, he tried to one up you.
At times it felt like he was purposely seeking you out, despite his brutal proclamation five days ago. Every attempt to rile you up failed. The most acknowledgement he got from you was a few scoffs and glares. He hadn’t even realised he was doing it, until Derek asked him point blank what his problem was. He didn’t have an answer, but now that he was aware of it he tried to go out of his way to avoid it. 
That didn’t last more than a few hours. The fact that he had to consciously avoid talking to you pissed him off, especially because he couldn’t stop. You pretending like he didn’t exist pissed him off even more. The one time he took his eyes off the board in front of him they landed on you. You were busy scribbling words in a file, trying to get a head start on your paperwork. 
“Do you plan to help at all?” He sneers, noticing that you looked a lot more relaxed than you did at the start of the case. 
You snap your head towards the board behind him. A rough venn diagram was drawn on a map of the city, small tacked notes labelling prominent buildings in the area. 
“How am I meant to help?” You question, darting your eyes between him and the board out of confusion.
“You’re asking me how to do your job?” He taunts, tilting his head and narrowing his eyes.
You dramatically groan, throwing your head back. 
It’s hard to believe that he’s a man of logic in moments like these. There have been far too many in the last few months. You bounce off your seat and head over to the board. Spencer stays glued in his spot and your body accidentally brushes against his as you try to get past. He watches you take off some notes and add on new ones but doesn’t register what you’re doing at first. He’s too intoxicated by your scent. His hand runs through his hair as he steps back in an effort to regain his composure. His teeth grit and his jaw tenses momentarily, he hates that you have the ability to do this to him. 
“What do you think you’re doing?” The pitch of his voice raises and his ears are burning.
“What do you mean?” You roll your eyes, shrugging your arms, sarcasm laced in your words. 
“Don’t try to act all dumb!” He berates, shaking his head. 
“Don’t try to act all smart.” Your eyes roll again. Spencer was slowly starting to wear down your apathy. 
“I am smart.” He scoffs. Your blood boils, this trump card is becoming too repetitive.
“Savour that, it’s the one good thing you’ve got going for you!” You finally snap. 
“You’re UNBELIEVABLE! The first time you bother to answer me all week and it’s just to argue?” He’s trying his best to refrain from yelling.
“Oh! You’ve been trying to start an argument all week and now that I’m giving in you can’t take it?! Actually, why have you been trying so hard, Doctor? I was under the impression that you can’t even stand to look at my face!”
He dryly swallows, unable to respond immediately. The reminder of his words makes him internally cringe. He never meant to say them. It was the most efficient way he could think of at that time to hurt you. Spencer hadn’t anticipated the sheer amount of will power it would take to stay away from you. You seeking him out made it infinitely harder. His fake disdain was a defence mechanism, he was hiding behind hatred to get the job done. 
“YOU–”
“Alright, that’s enough!” Hotch loudly cuts him off. 
Neither you nor Spencer noticed the teams return during your squabble. You’re slightly embarrassed, wondering how much they’ve witnessed. Spencer turns away from you and looks to the blank wall on the other side of the room. You look to the floor and bite the inside of your cheek. 
“Care to explain what’s going on?” He grills and you feel like a petulant child receiving a lecture from your father. 
“She wasn’t doing her job!” Spencer complains. “And when I brought it up she messed up my profile!”
“God you’re insufferable! It’s called ‘narrowing the profile’, Spencer. Maybe if you did it properly, I wouldn’t have to.” You retort. 
“Hey!” Hotch scolds.
It falls silent for a second, awkward glances finding their way around the room. Rossi breaks it first. 
“You know, if I didn’t know any better, I’d think you two were bickering toddlers instead of FBI agents.”
You make eye contact with Morgan trying to hold in a laugh and it makes you snort. 
“We will discuss this later. Let’s focus on the updates we’ve gathered.” Hotch dismisses due to more pressing matters at hand. 
“After talking to friends of the latest victims, I can confirm that they were all last seen in the same club.” JJ pipes up first.
“And the dumpsites are all less than twenty minutes away from there. He’s definitely not holding them anymore.” Morgan adds.
“That has to be where he’s choosing his victims. Did the medical examiner find anything new?” Hotch asks.
“Traces of GHB.” Emily replies. “We don’t know how he’s administering it into their systems, but my guess would be through the drinks.”
“Gamma-hydroxybutyrate, mostly known as GHB, is a party drug that produces feelings of euphoria, confidence, relaxation and sociability. Side effects of GHB can include drowsiness, vomiting, mood swings, dependence, as well as more serious symptoms of unconsciousness. When mixed with alcohol the risk of overdose increases as it can cause respiratory collapse leading to coma or in extreme cases death.” Spencer’s about to continue but quickly recognises that it’s a tangent he needs to cut short. 
“Wait JJ what club were the victims last seen in?” You inquire, walking closer to the map.
When she relays the name it clicks. 
“That’s smack in the middle of the comfort zone.” You point at a small red note labelling the building. 
“So how do we catch this guy? I mean the club would be packed and we don’t know what this guy looks like. The profile tells us that he would blend in, nothing would stand out about him.” Morgan subtly suggests a string operation.
“Except for when he’s alone with the object of his rage. Which in our case would be the women he’s using as surrogates. He'd be possessive, become clingy, hold on too tight and once those advances are rejected he’d fly into blind rage.” Spencer exclaims without realising the weight of his input. 
“Yeah…but he has a very specific type.” Rossi hesitates. 
A fact that everybody had been avoiding the case because of how close it hit to home. 
You’re his exact type.
“No.” Hotch shuts down.
“Hotch, think about it. I mean this guy is not slowing down. A sting might be our best bet to stop him before he kills again.” JJ shares Rossi’s hesitation.
“It’s too risky!” Spencer blurts, making it clear he’s against the idea. 
Everyone begins to chime in with their input, but you stay silent and think it over. None of them wanted to put you in this position, but you’d seen the bodies and what he’d done to those women. What he’ll continue to do to other women if he isn’t stopped. It was a no brainer on your end. 
“I’ll do it!” You announce amidst the chatter.
It comes to an immediate halt, all eyes shifting on you.
“What?” Spencer scoffs.
You can tell that he’s genuinely surprised by the small hitch in his voice. Emily sceptically calls your name, posing it as a question. 
“I’ll do it.” You reiterate, taking care to seem as confident as possible.
“Absolutely not! The odds of this going wrong are way too high!” Spencer howls with a little too much passion. 
“Reid’s right. The unsub is way too unpredictable.” Hotch debates.
“JJ has a point, think about it!” You argue. “We know for a fact that he’s going to strike tonight. Sending me undercover as bait is better than staking out the place and waiting for him to target a civilian!” 
“Okay so let’s send somebody else!” Spencer contests, his tone prayerful. 
For a split second, you see your best friend again. He’s showing more regard for you now than he has in months and it makes your heart sink knowing it won’t be forever. Still, you try to reason with him while he’s there.
“There’s no time! I fit his type. This is our best option.”
“No, this is stupid and dangerous. You’re not going in there!” He’s gone again. 
“That’s not your call to make!” You snap. 
“Hotch no!” Spencer tries again.
“Kid, relax! This isn’t her first undercover mission.” Morgan attempts to calm Reid. “Plus we’ll all be there in case anything goes wrong.”
“Statistically–”
“For God’s sake forget the fucking statistics! People’s lives are at stake!” You loudly end his tangent before it can begin. 
“Alright, everybody calm down!” Hotch speaks up, making it a point to stare down Spencer. 
He’d made his decision and Spencer can only stare back in disbelief, too breathless to argue. 
‘Like Morgan said, we’ll be there watching over you, along with some local law enforcement. You won’t be wired, but we’ll have a fail safe just in case you need backup earlier than expected. We don’t have a lot of time. Let’s get to work.” The unit chief asserts. 
Before anyone can make any further moves, Spencer storms out of the room. JJ runs after him, assuring Hotch that she’ll take care of it. The rest of you break off to your assigned tasks, preparing for the operation that night. 
“Spence! Slow down!” She yells, chasing him all the way outside the precinct. 
He’s breathing too fast, practically on the edge of hyperventilating. He pushes his hair back with both of his hands, pacing back and forth on the sidewalk. 
“Spence what the hell is going on with you?” JJ pants, reaching out to touch his shoulder.
“Me?!” Spencer yanks himself away from her. “What the hell is going on with all of you?! You’re all insane for allowing her to do this!”
“She’s a grown woman and a trained agent! This is her decision. She knows what she’s getting herself into.” JJ reminds him. 
“Well it’s not a very smart decision! She shouldn’t be making decisions this…this reckless!” He shrieks. 
“Okay you need to calm down!” JJ sternly states. 
“Jennifer, do not tell me to calm down! She’s about to make herself a direct target for a psychopathic sadist and you’re all just letting it happen!”
“So what? Should we let some innocent woman become his next target?” 
“No! I’m not saying we should– just– why does it have to be her?!” The emphasis on his last word gives him away, JJ picks up on it instantly. 
“That’s what this is about? C’mon you know better than this.” She relaxes her shoulders. “Spencer, we all care about her. We all want her to be safe. And she will be as long as we separate out feelings from–”
“Feelings? This has nothing to do with how I feel–”
“Okay stop! Stop! God!” JJ huffs with pauses between her words. “I am so sick of this! This is clearly about your feelings. The past four months have all been about–”
She smacks her hands against her face as she takes a deep breath, a display of frustration. 
“Listen to me.” She commands, exhausted from the back and forth. “It’s clear that you two care deeply for each other, whether you’re willing to admit it or not. Neither of you will talk about whatever it is that’s caused this rift– fine! But don’t you think it’s time to bury the hatchet now that she’s leaving?”
Spencer freezes. 
“...Leaving?” He repeats, taken off guard. 
JJ takes a moment to read his expression. 
“She didn’t tell you?” JJ mutters, still scanning his face. 
“What– what are you…” He can’t find the words, his eyes blinking rapidly as he tries to process her words.
“She’s resigning, Spencer. She’s leaving the FBI.” JJ can’t hide how she’s surprised that you haven’t shared this with him. 
“No, that's not possible. She loves this job. Why would she leave?” Denial is his first response.
Spencer thinks over your possible motivations and can only land on the obvious. You’d only leave if you grew to hate the job. 
Did he do this? Did he make you hate it?
“We were all surprised when she first told us, I mean, it came out of nowhere.”
“We?” He rubs his temple, anticipating a possible migraine from the bomb that just dropped on him. “How long?”
“What?”
“How long have you guys known?” He balefully sighs, trying his hardest to not misplace his anger. 
“It’s hard enough at work, I don’t want to see your face in my personal time too.” 
He had no one to be angry at, but himself.
“A day? Maybe two? She told us individually. Honestly with this case I haven’t had time to wrap my head around it.” JJ honestly reveals. 
So not long. Maybe you were still making your way around to telling him? You wouldn’t just leave without so much as telling him, would you?
A few months ago, Spencer would’ve confidently answered no. Today he was sure that you would. He so badly hoped that he was wrong. 
“Spence, look, we can talk about this later. But right now, you need to make sure you’re able to stay objective. Can you do that?”
He nods relentlessly, tucking his hair behind his ears. A habit he adapted early in life. It was an indicator of the gears turning in his head. JJ gives him a few more minutes outside before guiding him back in to help with preparations. Spencer absentmindedly performed his tasks, but all he could think about was you. 
You’re leaving and he’s the only person you hadn’t disclosed this information to. Abandonment was a feeling he was all too used to, but he never imagined that you’d abandon him. He knows that he can only blame himself, but he still can’t help the irritation that’s creeping in his veins. 
Even as he straps up his hidden bullet proof vest hours later, he can’t push the sentiment away. You were setting yourself up as bait for one of the most dangerous types of serial killers. On top of purposely putting yourself in direct line danger, you were leaving without telling him. He would’ve showed up to work one day and you’d be gone.
Right now he stands just a few feet away from you and you don’t look toward him once. No one would be able to guess that you’re undercover. It’s amazing how you’ve managed to transform yourself from supervisory special agent to a regular socialite and party girl in a couple of hours.
If he could overcome the hurt he feels at the moment, he might see how breathtaking you look. Then again, you always appear breathtaking to him. Before he knows it, he’s walked right up to you. You don’t feel his presence looming behind you until you bump into him when you turn around. 
“Shit Spencer!” You jump, mostly because of the nerves from the upcoming night. 
He’s about to say something but you beat him to it.
“Don’t start! I’m not in the mood.” You brush him off and disappear out of sight.
It was like that for much of the preparations. He’d muster the courage to try and talk to you, and you’d walk away. Much like how Spencer would avoid you when your friendship first fell apart. 
“Everybody in position?” Hotch inquires through his ear piece. 
“Affirmative.” Morgan gives the greenlight for your entry into the club. 
You made your way to the bar, making it a point to sit alone. You didn’t have to wait long. Archie Carter, 36, cheated on by his ex fiance before their wedding. She ran away with another man because Archie failed to keep his sadistic traits hidden and it scared her off. Torturing and murdering women who looked like her was his way of giving her a real reason to be scared. 
This was all information Garcia found after it was nearly too late. He’d managed to get you on the dance floor, subtly injecting you with the GHB. You didn’t even feel him do it. To everybody else it just seemed like you were playing your part really well on the dance floor, when in reality you were struggling to stand up. You couldn’t give out any signals and he was able to slip you away into the back alley under the noses of five FBI agents. 
It was Spencer who’d found you fighting for your life against Archie’s grip around your throat. Spencer, who put the bullet in Archie’s head after being unable to talk him down. Spencer who kneeled above you, begging you to come back as he began CPR. If he’d found you any later you might’ve been gone for good. 
Pissed was an understatement.
At the piece of shit that almost ripped you away from the world. At Hotch and the team for not listening. At himself for being right. Not you though, for the first time in a long time, he wasn’t pissed at you. He was terrified. Both for you and for almost losing you. 
You had to stay a few extra days in Anchorage, bound to your hospital room. The team refused to fly back without you, each of them taking turns to keep you company. They all felt an immense amount of guilt but you reassured them that it wasn’t their fault. Your tongue grew tired of reminding them that this was a part of the job. Rossi joked that it was a good thing you were leaving it all behind in that case and it stung more than you were willing to admit. 
In your brush with death you came to the revelation that you didn’t want to leave, but hearing Spencer’s voice lull you back to him confirmed that you needed to. You couldn’t bring yourself to hear him talk everyday and not be the person he was talking to. It was why you had basically barred him from visiting you during your recovery there. Seeing his face was more than you could handle at the time. Not seeing yours weighed on him, because he needed to see if you were okay.
Physically, he knew you’d be fine once the doctors confirmed it. Mentally, he knew all too well of the repercussions that came with almost dying directly by the hands of an unsub. You’d been discharged and cleared fifty eight hours after you were admitted, and the team was ready to fly back a few hours later. All the signs of being less than okay were there. He recognised them as soon as he saw you board the jet. 
Besides the obvious bruises collaring your neck, there was some minor swelling that lingered. That wasn’t his biggest concern. It was the smile plastered on you when you put on your ‘I’m okay’ act for the others. Your eyes, like always, gave you away. You were already trying to sweep everything under the rug. Less than a few minutes after take off you isolated yourself in the back. You’d been doing that a lot in your recent cases. 
It irked him how everybody just let you. He decided right then that he wasn’t going to. He didn’t care how much you hate him, he was going to ensure that you came out of this truly okay. You were mindlessly staring out the window, counting the clouds, listening to the music playing through your headphones. You tried to ignore the feeling of being watched. You’d felt like that since you came to, in the alley. 
It took you a second to understand that you were actually being watched, turning to find Spencer in the previously empty seat across from you. 
“You’ve gotta stop sneaking up on me.” You snark, ripping off your headphones, still recovering from the small jump scare.
“Sorry.” He chuckles out of habit.
You unintentionally smile at the sound and find yourself staring in his eyes. 
“Are–” He falters as he thinks the question over in his head. “Is there anything I can get you?”
You’re taken aback, not expecting those words. You had a script prepared to waive off questions about your well being. He knows you better than that, throwing you off course as usual.
“What do you want?” You grumble, accepting that you couldn’t get past him.
“I want to know if there’s anything I can get you.” He repeats in a low tone. 
There he is again. The Spencer you know and love. Your heart threatens to leap.
“If this is to clear some guilty conscience, don’t bother.” You verbally guard yourself. “I’m fine.”
It would be a lie if he said his reasoning was completely selfless. He was hardly able to keep away from you without feeling like he was drowning, but it was nothing compared to how he felt when he thought he may have lost you forever. The feeling didn’t last very long, he was able to revive you within a few seconds, but never feeling like that again would be too soon. 
Spencer believed in two things; statistics and facts. One fact he refused to ignore any longer is that he couldn’t live without you. He quietly opened that satchel that still clung across his torso, fishing out some pain killers and an unopened water bottle. 
“I know you probably forgot to take yours out of your bag.” He ignores your previous comment and slides the items across the table to you. 
Your gaze lingers on the items in front of you, but your hands stay folded in your lap as you piece everything together. 
“You know.” You whisper. 
“Were you going to tell me?” He gulps after a beat of silence. 
“Does it matter?” You're quick to respond.
“I wanna hear it from you.” He’s just as fast. 
You look up from the leaf of pills, he’s already surveilling you. It’s a short lived staring contest because your focus shifts behind him to Hotch, who’s observing this encounter from the kitchenette on the other end. Spencer continues waiting on you for a response but you stand up, ready to walk away. It dawns on you when you see your supervisor that technically you hadn’t officially resigned yet. The paperwork never got started because this case took priority and that was a detail you needed to sort out right away.
“Don’t go.” Spencer pleads when you take your first step.
Was it a request to sit back down or to stay with the BAU? You didn’t bother to clarify, he had no right to ask for either. 
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You let out a deep, exasperated sigh as you lie curled up in your warm sheet, scowling at the floor beneath you. It seemed that the universe (your friends) had it out to delay your departure as much as possible. It’s been four days since your return from Anchorage and you’ve been stuck in your apartment since Hotch dropped you off here. He’s ordered mandatory time off for your recovery, meaning the paperwork has to wait. 
You could be using this time in a more productive manner. You could be searching for a new job. And a new place to live. You should be trying to figure out where this new place would be. You never actually thought that far ahead. In your haste to run away, you forgot to plan your next steps. You’ve convinced yourself that you can’t do any of it until the forms are filled out. 
The ‘universe’ isn’t the only thing delaying you. 
If you really wanted to, you could have everything emailed to you. You can have it done online, but there are two major problems. The first is pretty straight forward; you’re not ready to leave. You know that this is the best course of action for everybody, but your brain and your heart are at an impasse. You’ve dedicated years to this job because you love this job. Unfortunately, you love Spencer more, which means that staying is going to drive you to hate your job. 
The other reason is slightly more nuanced and you don’t want to think about it, opting to let your impasse be the reason for your lack of motivation to do anything other than bed rotting. It’s not as bad as it seems, it’s more self care than anything. Your body’s telling you it needs to rest and you’re simply obliging. Plus, it couldn’t be that serious if you still had bursts when you had to keep up appearances. You have to be okay if you’re able to force yourself to open the front door for your coworkers when they come to check on you. You really weren’t that miserable if you managed to smile and laugh for their short visits. 
And it’s not like you’re truly rotting. You showered quite often, you actually just had your second one today. You were definitely okay if you could manage to keep up with hygiene. It’s not excessive, you need to scrub the purple away. You know that’s not how it works, but you can’t stand to look at the parts of your neck where his hands were wrapped around. If you close your eyes for long enough you can still feel him squeezing until–
You’re okay.
No, you’re irritated. The incessant knocking on your front door won’t stop no matter how much you ignore it. You were relieved when evening came. It meant that normal visiting hours were over and you could rest today. If it wasn’t any of your usual visitors then it had to be stranger. The thought made you uneasy, you hesitated to answer it at all. 
You can’t live in fear all the time. 
The door eventually opens and Spencer sees you for the first time in days. He actually tried to check on you earlier, but Penelope insisted everybody stick to her roster so you don’t get overwhelmed. The circles under your eyes were almost as dark as his, you hadn’t been getting much sleep. The swelling around your throat was almost all gone, but the bruising wasn’t healing like he expected it to. 
“Spencer…what are you doing here?” Your voice is hoarse. 
“I brought take out.” He gently dangles a bag of food in front of him, his voice high, but quiet. 
You can practically smell the contents of the bag, nostalgia hitting you like a ton of bricks. It was your favourite thing to order on the days he’d come over for movie nights. Before Spencer showed you a side of him you didn’t know existed. It felt like a taunt, like he was twisting the metaphorical knife he plunged in your heart. It made you sick.
“I already ate.” You lie, mustering a dull smile on your face.
Spencer swallows and bites the inside of his cheek, not taking his eyes off you. Trying to think of the best way to call you out without causing you to shun him. 
“We can do something else until you’re hungry again.” He gives a tight lipped smile and raises his furrowed brows, like he’s pleading for you to accept his offer.
“I don’t think I’ll be hungry anytime soon.” You awkwardly laugh– well it’s close to a laugh if not for your strained vocal chords. 
“Can I come in anyway? We can put on a movie.” He’s using the voice he used to when trying to comfort you or convince you of something. Soft, low, steady. It’s a stark contrast to the voice you’ve been hearing for the last ten days. 
Please don’t come back here. It’s hard enough at work, I don’t want to see your face in my personal time too.
Tears threaten the composure you’re working so hard to maintain.
“Why are you really here?” You sigh, unable to stick with the pleasantries. 
“I told you.” He emphasises the bag of food in his hands again. “Take out. Maybe a movie–”
“Cut the shit.” You assert, harshly. “You can tell Penelope that you came to see me so she gets off your back, but please stop pretending like you care.”
“That’s…is that why you think I’m here?” His shoulders drop.
“Isn’t it?” You bite, your door now wide open as you lean against it for support. Your legs are aching to curl into your chest again. 
“No.” His reply is short and clear, leaving no room for misinterpretation. “I’m here because I want to be here.”
“Why? There’s nothing in it for you.” You scoff, blinking from confusion. “Unless…is this some sick game? Seeing me like this– knowing that I’m– are you trying to gloat?”
“Gloat?” He repeats in almost a whisper, the hurt in his voice evident.
“Relish, rejoice, rub it in, I don’t know. You’re the walking thesaurus.”
He can tell from your lax posture that you're amused. Your back is against your door, hands behind your back and you’re leaning forward a bit as you stare at the ground. Not caring that your words cut deep.
Is this how low you think he is?
“Why would I be enjoying this?” His hopeful smile drops entirely as he tries to understand you. 
“Call it epicaricacy.” You shrug. 
“Epicaricacy?” He mumbles in a whispered tone, like he’s trying to process what you said.
Deriving pleasure from the misfortune of others.
Your eyes roll from how slow he’s acting and you have to hold yourself back from repeating the definition out loud.
“Do you honestly think I enjoy seeing you like this?” The change in pitch stings a bit. 
“No, I don’t think you like seeing me at all.” You half smirk up at him, sadness evident in your eyes. “Which brings us back to…why are you here Doc?”
“That’s not true.” He cringes, ignoring the second part.
“Not true?” You wiggle your brows sarcastically. 
“Not true.” He reaffirms, sighing deeply. “I didn’t mean it. I’m sorry.” 
“You’re sorry.” You scoff again, shaking your head.
“I know that I’ve been unreasonable–”
“Unreasonable?” The tip of your tongue rolls against the back of your teeth, bewildered at his sheer audacity. 
“A dick! I’ve been a dick.” He corrects himself, desperate to have you hear him out. 
You tighten your jaw, inhaling lightly through your nose and your brows are raised as high as they can go. 
“I was hurt. Okay? I wash lashing out, but, I–” He takes a deep breath to stop himself, wanting to get to the point. “I know that I’ve been acting otherwise but, I care about you. And when I found you back there…I just…I know what you’re going through, even if you won’t admit it. I don’t want you to go through it alone.”
Your expression softens as he speaks. Of course he knows. He knows you better than anyone. For a moment you consider allowing yourself to break down in his arms, like you would have once. It’s jarring, Spencer reverting to his former self after he saved your life. The comfort swiftly bubbles into anger. All your attempts for reconciliation were met with so much hostility before. It took you almost dying for him to care. It feels too little too late. The only thing you can think of as he stands next to you is all the ways he can further hurt you if you let him. You push off your door and stand straight, giggling bitterly. 
“Spencer, go home.” You say with the same bitterness. 
“Please–”
“Go home! I don’t want your pity!” You yell. It feels alleviating. “Do you honestly think that  anything changes just because you saved my life? Do you think it erases everything that’s happened in the past few months? Because it doesn’t! Things can’t go back to how they were simply because you feel bad that I almost died. It’s not a flip you can switch. You don’t just get to start caring!” 
You're heaving and he can only stare at the ground. He knows you’re right, except for the one crucial error in your speech. 
“I never stopped caring.” He mumbles.
This fucking idiot.
Enraged, sad, frustrated, confused; all emotions you’ve been suppressing that are now fighting to show at the same time. You take a step closer to him and he meets your eyes again. You can see that he’s holding back tears, same as you. It fuels you in a twisted way. You have an opportunity to hurt him the way he hurt you and you don’t let it go to waste.
“Don’t come back here. It’s hard enough at work to see your face at work, I don’t want to see it in my personal time too.” 
You can’t stay to see the effects of his words thrown back at his face, your heart’s threatening to burst from how fast it’s racing. His jaw locks from how tense he is. He knows exactly why you said it, but it’s still hard to hear. You turn around and rush into your apartment, shutting the door on his face, leaving him standing there. You don’t make it too far inside, collapsing on the wooden floor with a choked sob. 
That didn’t make you feel as good as you thought it would. You hoped that maybe if you could make him feel at least a fraction of you’re feeling, you’d hurt less. It was more than just getting back at him for everything he’s done. You were unknowingly trying to punish him for what Archie Carter did too. It didn’t make you hurt any less, but at least you felt less alone in your hurt. 
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He didn’t come back for the rest of your time off. Everybody continued to follow the roster, showing up on their days and bringing you ‘get well soon’ goodies. Penelope even invited herself over for a night's stay once. You didn’t have the heart to say no, but you found yourself counting the hours until you’d be alone again, free to wallow. The only respite you got for the next week was on Spencer’s days. You could expect to be left mostly alone, only a bag of take out accompanied by an eerily fitting quote sitting outside your door. 
You hate to admit that those were your favourite days. You had a chance to breathe and he somehow knew exactly what you needed to hear. You gave the food away in protest and the quote would go straight in the bin (once you read it). One final psych evaluation later you were cleared to come back. Not that you needed one since you didn’t plan to stay for long. It was really just a formality. By the time you returned only a few faded bruises remained, easy enough to cover with concealer. 
“You’re back! Ooh, it’s so good to see you!” Garcia was the first with a warm greeting and a tight hug. You reciprocated to the best of your ability. 
“Good to have you back, Pretty Girl.” Derek’s second, walking you through the bullpen as you make your way to Hotch’s office.
“Enjoy it while you can.” You giggle in reply. “Is Hotch in yet?”
“I see someone can’t wait to leave us.” Emily jokes, feigning a hurt look. You roll your eyes.
“Yeah, he’s expecting you.” JJ laughs, slapping Emily’s arm playfully. 
“Thanks JJ!” You smile and they all watch you disappear behind the door. 
“So it’s official? She’s really leaving?” JJ questions through a half-hearted smile. 
“I asked Rossi and he said that Hotch is gonna ask her to stay until we find a replacement.” Emily replies, still eyeing the door. 
“How did you get Rossi to admit that?” JJ turns to the raven head, questioningly, and Emily smiles coyly giving no response. 
“Am I the only one who thinks this whole thing would end once they make up? I mean come on, we all know she’s leaving because of him, right?” Morgan looks at Spencer, who’s nose deep in a file at his desk. 
“Yeah, but we can’t help if they refuse to talk to us about it.” Emily sighs, hanging her head back. 
The three dive deeper into their discussion and you’re none the wiser from inside the cream-coloured walls of Hotch’s office. As per protocol, he’s just finished informing you of what’s next and you’re kind enough to accept his request to stay until they find a replacement. You definitely said yes because you want to make the team’s transition easier, not for any self indulgent reasons such as you not being ready to leave. 
“Just return this to me once you’ve filled it out.” He instructs as he hands you a file containing your resignation forms. 
“Thanks Hotch.” You smile, grabbing the file. 
You begin heading towards the door when he stops you by your name. 
“I understand that you’re set on this decision, but I am sad to see you go.” It’s insane how many emotions this man can get across while maintaining a blank expression. “However, if you change your mind at any point, let me know.” 
“Thanks Hotch.” You playfully scoff, appreciating that even he has to try at least once. 
If one more person tries though, you might scream. It wasn’t easy, pretending that you weren’t crumbling inside. The extra pressure doesn’t make it any easier. You leave his office, closing the door behind you and approach your desk. The resignation forms are put aside for later as you still have to finish your case report from Anchorage. Part of you wanted to put it off until the last minute, the other part wanted to get it over and done with as soon as possible. 
“Coffee?” Penelope chirps, holding out a mug filled with the hot beverage. 
“Thanks Pen.” You smile up at her, taking it out of her hands. 
“No problem.” She smirks mischievously and trots off. 
A strange lady, but your strange lady.
Upon your first sip you almost choke it out. It was perfect. Exactly to your liking. Which would be a good thing, except only one person knows exactly how you like it. Back when you first joined, you learned how popular coffee was with all the employees. You felt out of place because you weren’t a massive fan of the drink and you avoided too much sugar because it made you feel sick. You soon discovered that you liked it a lot more with honey instead. It was a weird preference, but it worked for you, making it sweet without overpowering your senses like sugar did. 
You never declined a cup when offered by your colleagues, not wanting to dishearten them. It was Spencer who caught you sneaking honey into your cup when you thought no one was paying attention. He never mentioned anything to you, but the next time he returned with a cup to offer, you couldn’t help but the smile that adorned your face for the rest of the day. It was why you dedicated yourself to morning breakfast runs for him, memorising his coffee order as a silent thank you. Neither of you ever talked about it. 
You spin your seat around to find Spencer engaged in conversation with Rossi. You consider walking past him and dumping the beverage in the sink to make a point, but it was a welcome energiser for the dreadful task at hand. Plus you aren’t wasteful. You spin back around and decide to accept it just this once. 
When he’s sure you’re no longer looking he sets his sights back on you. A small smile forms across his lips when he sees you drink the coffee. He honestly expected you to throw it away. He feared that if he was the one to deliver the mug, you’d throw it on him. It was why he convinced Garcia to do it, bribing her by promising to buy a round of drinks on the next night out. 
“Kid, are you even listening?” Rossi scolds in an incredulous way. 
As the hours pass, your frustration grows. You couldn’t get yourself to write the details of the case. Your mind refused to think about it. You had hoped that taking breaks would make it easier, but everytime you returned to the page your head went blank.
“Need some help?” Spencer asks, spawning next to you.
“Christ, Reid!” You blurt, startled. “I thought I told you to stop doing that.” 
“Sorry.” He chuckles as if on cue. 
You glare at him expectantly. He doesn’t say anything, glancing between you and the unfinished case file, waiting for an answer. 
“No thanks.” You keep it short, hoping he takes the hint. 
“Let me know if you do.” He doesn’t. 
“You wouldn’t even be the last person I’d ask if I did.” You snark. 
“But you would eventually?” He stays calm, almost playful. 
Smart ass. 
You choose to ignore him, be the bigger person and all that. Even though he wasn’t antagonising you. 
“Thanks for the coffee.” It’s forceful gratitude. You weren’t feeling grateful, but you still had manners. 
“You’re welcome.” 
“Don’t make it again.” 
“I will not.” He grins and walks away to his desk. 
You act like you don’t know he’s watching you work. Looking up often to find you stuck on the same page. Even if he knew that you know, he didn’t plan to stop. What he does know is that you’d never directly let him help you. He doesn’t care. There weren’t any new cases this week, so a ton of paperwork was to be expected. It’s taunting enough to write down details of your own assault, the extra paperwork would only add more stress. You’re too busy trying to push through the mental blockade to notice the sudden influx of files on his desk and the efflux on yours. 
What you didn’t miss was how the next cup of coffee you were offered was just as perfect as the one from before. 
“I thought I told you to stop with the coffee, Reid.” You lightly slam the paper cup on Spencer’s desk. 
He leans back in his seat and chews on his lip with an entertained smirk. 
“And I did. That’s not from me.” He’s earnest with his response.
“Oh, so JJ just happens to know my coffee preferences all of a sudden?” You sarcastically retort, crossing your arms.
“No.” He crosses his fingers across his lap. “I told her how you like your coffee when she said she was going on a coffee run.”
“And why did you do that?” You play along, unenthusiastically. 
“Because you told me to stop doing it.” He states in the most casual way possible. 
This was getting you nowhere. It was naive to think he’d let you spend your last few weeks here peacefully. Scratch that– he was being peaceful. Too peaceful. A new tactic to get under your skin?
“Stop. It.” The delivery of your words is slow and emphasised. 
“Stop doing exactly what you’ve told me to?”
You bite your tongue and glare at him. His face, shoulders, arms, everything, is relaxed. You can’t even argue with him. You take a moment to consider how bad it would be if you bashed his head in with the back of your gun. Then you take another to critique how easy it is to pass the psych evals. They should really think about the consequences of using questions the BAU wrote on actual BAU agents. 
After that day you went back to ignoring him. Any time coffee was offered you’d decline altogether. If he attempted to try and talk to you, you’d respond with yes or no for the sake of professionalism. This didn’t deter Spencer though. He gave you your space but kept a close eye on you, continuing to try and ease your burdens from afar. Exactly how he used to. 
This only lasted until the next case came in. Specifically until you were back out on the field, where he perceived you to be in high amounts of danger. You tolerated it because it gave you comfort, not that you’d ever tell him. Having Spencer by your side made it easier to deal with the reality that there’s little you can do if another incident like Anchorage occurred. 
Plus focusing your energy on ignoring him kept the flashbacks away. Or it did, until the take down. You once again found yourself in danger from an unsub, only this time the situation was controlled. All guns were pointed at the killer, except for the one that was pointed at you. The plan was simple: you talk down the unsub, take him back to the station and talk him into exposing his partner. 
Everything was going according to plan, until Spencer realised that one of the cops in the room was his partner and he was about to shoot you. Nobody understood what happened before the situation calmed down. Spencer had fired the first shot towards the dirty cop and immediately tackled you to the ground, shielding you from the hail of bullets that followed after. All you remember clearly is freezing up, clinging to the man on top of you. One moment you were screaming out, trying to make sure that he was okay and the next you were back in the alley behind the bar, fighting for your life. 
You didn’t comprehend anything until the panic attack subsided but Spencer was fine. His vest caught the bullets. Both unsubs were dead. Rossi and Prentiss came to the realisation the same time as Spencer and were quick to react. And you weren’t in the alley. You were in Spencer’s arms as he led you away from the scene when it was safe. 
When you snapped out of it the medics had cleared him of any injuries. He tried to approach you during your check up, but you shoved him away, unable to even look at him. The only thing you remember clearly is Hotch sending you all back to your hotel rooms before tomorrow’s flight back. You should be asleep right now, if not from the exhaustion of today’s events alone, then from how long you spent reassuring everybody that you were okay. 
You couldn’t sleep. Not when so many thoughts were occupying your headspace. This is the second time Spencer’s saved your life, in the span of roughly a month. The first time he’s put his life in direct danger to save yours. Had it not been for his vest he would be dead. The more you linger on it, the angrier you’d become. You were also wearing a vest, you would’ve been fine. What he did was unnecessary and reckless. 
What if the bullet missed the vest? Entered through the side? What was he thinking?
You were mentally fighting the urge to barge into his room and yell at him for his stupidity, but you couldn’t bring yourself to go to him. What happens to him is not your problem anymore. You aren’t going to let your guard down just because he’s an idiot.
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Spoilers: BAU! Reader, Reader almost dies, Reader and Spencer are pissing me off, bc they’re so dumb, angst, hurt no comfort, Reader gets a little revenge.
AN - Before you comment ANYTHING, there is one more part. It’ll be posted a lot sooner than this one was. Writing this made me realise how limited the English language is. There’s only so many words to use and ways to write them. If either part sounds repetitive at times, it’s not my fault!!! Casual reminder: I am not Spencer Reid. I don’t have an IQ of 187. Any facts I make him spew could very well be bull-shit and he only spews them for the purpose of the story. I also have no knowledge of how the FBI works and lack a ton of common sense. A lot of things were made up for the purpose of this story.
If you comment you garner good karma for yourself and that could lead to you meeting MGG someday (I’m not liable if this never happens), think about that... 
Thank you for reading!
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harrysfolklore · 5 months ago
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plsss can you make a fake instagram where the reader is a lawyer
you know how to ball, i know aristotle - op81
i really liked how this one turned out ! we love sino oscar 🥰 make sure to leave your feedback
MASTERLIST | MY PATREON
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yourinstagram greetings from the library 🧐 keeping an eye on my angel boy who started kindergarten (aka formula one) last month
tagged: oscarpiastri
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username1 serving cunt in the library we love to see it ♥︎ by author
username2 fellow columbia student right here 🙋‍♀️
↳ yourinstagram omgg we should hang out soon
username3 since when are you into f1 bestie
↳ yourinstagram since i’m dating one of the drivers 🤔
oscarfan1 THIS IS OSCAR’S GF??? SHES GORGEOUS ♥︎ by author, oscarpiastri
username4 i’ve been following for ages now but i just found out that she’s dating a famous athlete 😭
oscarfan2 i was ‪hoping that oscar was single but now that i found out that he has a beautiful AND smart gf i want them to adopt me
logansargeant I’ve been taking care of him in the playground, don’t worry
↳ yourinstagram i wouldn’t expect any less from you
↳ landonorris We haven’t met yet but I’m also taking care of little Oscah ♥︎ by author
↳ landofan1 OFC HE HAD TO COMMENT
↳ yourinstagram well thank you, little lando norris
mclaren When will we see you in papaya gear at a race? 🧡 Ps. The last picture is so real
↳ yourinstagram omg when college stops kicking my ass
↳ oscarfan1 i love her already
oscarpiastri I miss you so much, but I’m so happy to see you in your dream school, smart girl🤍 ♥︎ by author
↳ oscarfan2 IM SOBBING THIS IS SO SWEET
↳ yourinstagram i love you ��
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liked by yourinstagram, landonorris and 457,296 others
oscarpiastri The smile on my face could only mean one thing: It’s home race weekend 🇦🇺
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oscarfan1 BABYYYYY
oscarfan2 he looks so kissable
mclaren Australia’s National Treasure 🧡
oscarfan3 MANIFESTING A PODIUM SO HARD
logansargeant Good luck on your home race bro 🙌 ♥︎ by author
↳ oscarfan1 bestiesss
username1 i’m still waiting for his girlfriend’s paddock debuttt
alex_albon The superior papaya boy ♥︎ by author
↳ landofan1 LANDO WAS FOUND CRYING
↳ oscarfan1 i love them
landonorris I’m going to categorically ignore what alex albon just said
↳ landofan1 HES SOOOO😭
landonorris Don’t to fool your audience, your smile is because your girl is finally coming ♥︎ by author, yourinstagram
↳ landofan2 OMFGGGGGGGGG
↳ oscarfan2 OSCAR AND YN PADDOCK DEBUT CONFIRMED BY LANDOOOO
↳ oscarfan3 goddd i was praying for this
↳ yourinstagram but can you blame him? ♥︎ by author
↳ username2 I LOVE THIS RELATIONSHIP SM
yourinstagram i can’t wait to see you, squish 🥺 ♥︎ by author
↳ oscarfan1 SQUISH I COULD SOBBBB
↳ oscarfan2 they’re so adorable i can’t do this
↳ oscarpiastri ❤️❤️❤️
yourinstagram added to their stories
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yourinstagram took a break from law school to finally go to my first race 🕺 SO PROUD OF YOU @oscarpiastri
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username1 AWEEE your wag era finally
oscarfan1 QUEEN OF THE PADDOCK ♥︎ by author
carmenmmundt It was so lovely to meet you ✨ ♥︎ by author
↳ yourinstagram likewise beautiful carm 💓
↳ username2 i just want to be one of them
oscarfan2 thank you yn for giving us a weekend of blushy and smiley oscar and the best boyfriend content ever
oscarfan3 COME TO EVERY RACE PLEASEEE
↳ yourinstagram i would love to but i have to get my degree 🥲
mclaren You’re officially a papaya girl now 🧡
username2 they make the best couple ever bc she’s all brains and he’s all muscle ♥︎ by author
landonorris Go get that degree now, I need someone who can get me out of jail for free
↳ landofan1 WHY IS HE LIKE THIS 😭😭
↳ yourinstagram 🫡🫡🫡
username3 she’s stronger than me because is oscar piastri was my bf and i had the chance to travel around the world with him and look pretty u would drop out of college already
↳ yourinstagram just a few months till graduation i can do it okay
↳ oscarfan2 I LOVE HER
oscarpiastri Having you here made this weekend the best ever. I love you ❤️ ♥︎ by author
↳ oscarfan1 BOYFRIEND OSCAR I CANT
↳ username1 why can’t my boyfriend simp for me like this
↳ yourinstagram i loveeee youuuu
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oscarpiastri The perfect home race weekend 🇦🇺 I miss you already @yourinstagram 🤍
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oscarfan1 AWEEEEE
oscarfan2 MY HEART
georgerussell63 I need more of those grandma Piastri cookies ♥︎ by author
↳ danielricciardo Same
↳ username1 LET ME INNNN 😭
mclaren We love Australia 🦘🌏
oscarfan3 yn and oscar shouldn't be separated that's like a crime ♥︎ by yourinstagram
oscarfan4 THE THRID PIC MY HEARTTTT
landonorris Your girlfriend is cooler than you btw ♥︎ by yourinstagram
↳ landofan1 and teammate of the year award goes to lando norris
↳ logansargeant I agree
↳ username2 imagine the entire grid loving you
↳ oscarpiastri You're supposed to be my friend
↳ landonorris And she’s going to be my personal lawyer soon so
↳ yourinstagram 😭😭😭
yourinstagram i love you so much, angel. thank you for this weekend 🥺 ♥︎ by author
↳ username2 their relationship is the purest thing ever
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oscarpiastri Little mid season recharge. Visiting my favorite future lawyer 🤎
tagged: yourinstagram
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oscarfan1 AWEEEEEE
oscarfan2 we love softie oscarrrr
username1 oh to be a columbia student
landonorris My kids ❤️❤️
↳ landofan1 lando is the biggest shooter for this relationship
↳ yourinstagram you’re just two years older than me..
↳ landonorris And? You’re my kids
↳ oscarfan2 I LOVE THEMMMM
username2 yn’s curls are so prettyyyy omg ♥︎ by author
nicolepiastri Our smart girl ! 👩‍⚖️ ♥︎ by author, yourinstagram
↳ oscarfan1 aweee mama piastri
↳ yourinstagram love you 🥺
username3 imagine chilling in the library procrastinating some homework and you turn around and oscar piastri is there
yourinstagram i love you so much squish 🫶 ♥︎ by author
↳ oscarfan1 why are her pet names for him so damn adorable
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yourinstagram i can’t believe it’s my last week here and i’m going to be a real lawyer soon 😳
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username1 GRADUATION IS SOOOON OMG
username2 i’ve been following you since you graduated high school and posted tips about college applications and now you’re about to finish college omg ♥︎ by author
oscarfan1 OMG OSCAR MUST GO TO HER GRADUATION
lilymhe congratulations smart girl 🤍🤍 ♥︎ by author
↳ yourinstagram thank you lovely 🫶
oscarfan2 THE LAST PICTURE IM YELLING
username3 she has the coolest life ever
mclaren Everyone in the papaya department is super proud 🧡
↳ yourinstagram ilysm mclaren admin
logansargeant How come you’re still dating my friend, who barely finished high school 😂 congrats!
↳ yourinstagram he’s cuuuuute 🥺
↳ oscarfan1 oscar’s friends are always dragging him help
↳ landonorris And can’t win a GP
↳ oscarpiastri You surely got confident after Miami, Lando Onewin ♥︎ by author, georgerussell63, alex_albon
↳ landofan1 STOOOOOP😭
oscarpiastri I’m always proud and in awe of you, but specially now 🤍 ♥︎ by author
↳ oscarfan1 I LOVE SIMP OSCAR
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f1updates “My girlfriend graduating from Columbia Law School next week so as soon as the job is done here I’m heading to New York. I’m really proud of here and I wouldn’t miss this moment for anything else.” - Oscar Piastri for SKY Sports
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oscarfan1 OMFG IM CRYING
oscarfan2 smile heart eyes and blush make an appearance again
oscarfan3 he’s super proud you can tell by his eyes
oscarfan4 flexing his lawyer girlfriend as he should
oscarfan5 SO HIGH SCHOOL IS ABOUT THEM
oscarfan6 my definition of a simp
yourinstagram has added to their story
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oscarpiastri My girlfriend is a lawyer 💙
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oscarfan1 I LOVE THISSSSS
oscarfan2 WHAT IF I CRY
username1 that cake is too iconic i need it
georgerussell63 Congrats YN! ♥︎ yourinstagram
oscarfan3 the cake is that tiktok audio 😭😭
nicolepiastri We’re all so proud of you @yourinstagram 👩‍🎓🤍 ♥︎ by author, yourinstagram
↳ oscarfan1 mama piastri loves her they’re getting married
↳ yourinstagram love you! thank you for the unconditional support 🥺
charles_leclerc Well done 👏👏 ♥︎ by yourinstagram
lilymhe 💓💓💓 ♥︎ by yourinstagram
username2 imagine having a columbia degree AND a hot boyfriend i can’t relate
mclaren Our favorite lawyer 🧡 ♥︎ by author, yourinstagram
↳ oscarfan2 the mclaren intern just loves yn
oscarfan4 good time to remind everyone that oscar barely finished high school but he somehow bagged a lawyer girlfriend
landonorris Yooo congrats @yourinstagram I can speed while driving and pass red lights now that I have someone who can get me out or jail for free
↳ landofan1 LANDO PLEASE 😭
↳ yourinstagram please do not do that i beg you
landonorris You’re welcome for the cake idea btw
↳ oscarfan1 I KNEW oscar could never come up with that
↳ yourinstagram so it was you ! huh
↳ oscarpiastru Shhhh
yourinstagram i love you so much ❤️❤️ ♥︎ by author
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yourinstagram you know how to ball, i know aristotle 🤍 proof that we’re both awkward for pictures
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username1 CUTIES
oscarfan1 I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 😭
oscarfan2 they really said 🧍‍♂️🧍‍♀️ ♥︎ by author
mclaren 🧡🧡 ♥︎ by author
oscarfan3 they match each other’s freak
alexandrasaintmleux ❤️ ♥︎ by author
username2 you look so cute together
nicolepiastri My babies 🥺 ♥︎ by author, oscarpiastri
landonorris Hug your girlfriend wtf @oscarpiastri
↳ landofan1 😭😭😭
↳ oscarpiastri Don’t tell me what to do thank you very much
oscarfan4 that lyric is literally THEM
username3 pretty, smart and a swiftie we love to see it
oscarpiastri I’m the trophy boyfriend ���� ♥︎ by author
↳ username1 ugh i need a man like him
↳ oscarfan1 exactly oscar know your place
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angy-grrr · 3 months ago
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i will hunt you in your dreams and make them nightmares WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT YOU FOOL
Guys… what if this big announcement ends up being about the live action adaptation?
We haven’t seen anything about that in a while and now I’m paranoid
#/lh#WE KNOW ABOUT THEM ALREADY WHY WOULD THEM GRAAAGHRAGHG#Nobody needed the live action#actually i heard the stage ver is cool and from what i have seen yeah its fun!#but LIVE ACTION?#never over the cast -what was the reason of making the blorblos white boys???#white ppl already have a problem perceiving all anime characters as white!#Idc about diversifying the cast BUT TO MAKE THEM WHITE IS TO GO BACKWARDS#especially when its made for english speaking audiences right?#WHY WOULD THEY DO THAT#Or are they afraid non white protagonists would be “too much to handle”#this is light turner again#never letting it go#idk they could have done something to add to the story by adapting what other characters in their world feel and see in that war#I’m sorry I’m actually not I’ll always be a live action hater#especially pointless ones which whitewash the cast#How does that need an special announcement? Say it with the rest lol#also again we already know the vigilantes anime is happening right? I remember it being confirmed so why would that be new#If the news is “we have an official date to release [insert already confirmed project from 2023]” I’ll die#just say the date there’s no need to act like that’s bigger news than a new art book#(not trying to hate on others’ hard work just don’t understand why would it need a different date from the others to announce it)#as theres no surprises behind it we already know for a long time#this isnt our hero academia WHO WOULD CHOOSE TO DO THIS FOR SUCH A THING
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silver-tangent · 1 year ago
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You know… the bait and switch of Scott Pilgrim takes off was needed.
Scott Pilgrim was meant to be a subversion of tropes, and it got picked up by a bunch of nice guys, myself included at one point, who turned it into their anthem.
The original comic was about Everyman Scott Pilgrim having to win a woman by fighting her evil exes, and on the surface that’s what it was. Between the fanbase and the movie, that’s as shallow as anyone goes…
Except that Scott didn’t win her by defeating her evil exes. Scott was troubled and problematic. In the end he wasn’t abusive but he was neglectful and took Ramona for granted to the point that her abusive and manipulative ex managed to convince her to go back to him… mostly out of fear of what would happen to dumb, hapless, Scott.
Scott was an exceptional fighter in his videogame world… he beat like… one of the seven. The rest of the time he was saved by complete dumb luck, by his friends, and by Ramona.
The entire point was slowly realizing how silly the situation was, and how he wasn’t a white knight… he was set up to be a white knight only to knock that idea down and have Ramona and friends help him.
They learned, they grew, they were both toxic and broken people for different reasons, Scott through ignorance and a lack of experience and Ramona through trauma and abusive relationships…
And in the comic… they don’t exactly break up but she ghosts him. Horribly… and he ends up fighting Gideon anyway, and rescuing her… by gaining the Power of Understanding. That’s right, not self-respect. Understanding…
And the last page they decide to try again, but we don’t know what that means… everyone moves on to a better place in their lives, a lot of them move on from Scott and Ramona romantically… and Scott and Ramona get to just… see where this goes…
and that’s a sweet note to end on. Two people who didn’t know how to be healthy partners growing up, and timidly trying it all over, with no confirmation of how it works.
Movie? Movie came out before book 6, audiences didn’t like the ending where Scott chases after Ramona (differently from the books like he literally chases after her) so Scott earns the power of self respect, and gets back with Knives…
And intended or not, it just sets up this idea that Ramona was the bad guy. Ramona, the abuse victim, was friend-zoning Scott; the nice guy…
And for a decade, the fandom has kinda devolved into that mentality; Scott Pilgrim is the savior of the nice guys. Ramona is the unobtainable girl. Knives is the victim…
O’Malley’s original point, that relationships are hard and trauma is hard, and nobody can do it alone… lost.
To the point that we are so deep in this nice guy culture that making a sequel disguised as a reboot (will not spoil more) was necessary. He had to make the point more obvious, that the story was always about Ramona working through her relationship trauma… Scott was the house husband. He was always meant to be.
Everyone I see complaining about the twist… does not get the point of the comics… and I’ve been bitching about the movie for more than a decade so I’m sorry… it’s not a *bad* movie… but it’s clear most of the fanbase only watched the movie. And it’s clear most of the people complaining are Gideon in denial… no… Future Scott in denial… which is in fact the point.
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physalian · 7 months ago
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10 More Character Types the World Needs More of
Part 1 was specifically character dynamics, but I’m considering this a sequel anyway.
1. Fiercely independent character’s lesson isn’t to “trust people”
I’m not projecting. You’re projecting. There is a divide wide enough to fit the Grand Canyon between “trusting that someone isn’t lying” and “trusting someone to follow through on a promise”. Most dumpster fire attempts at these characters (almost exclusively women) rely solely on mocking them for the former because “not all men” or something.
Being consistently let down in life makes you hesitant to a) gain friends, b) pursue romantic interests, c) maintain familial relationships, d) get excited about any event that demands participation from someone who isn’t you. None of this is simply a bad attitude—it’s a trauma response. There is no lesson to be learned, and not even exposure therapy can help because it’s a real, legitimate, and common stunt people pull, whether they mean it or not.
So write one of these characters and legitimize their fears, give them someone who proves the exception to the rule, but do not let the lesson be “well they just haven’t found the right person yet”. Even the “right person” can let them down. It's about not becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy by sabotaging a good thing to prove it will inevitably go bad.
2. Conventionally attractive men who aren’t horndogs
I’m going to find every way I can to tell you to write more aces. This is to fight the stigma that attractive people must be attracted to people. Give me gorgeous aces and demi’s, men, women, enbys and everyone in between, who put a crap ton of effort into looking their best, and yet happen to not have a very loud libido. They look good for themselves, and not to impress anyone else.
Give me someone who could have anyone they wanted, gender regardless, and just simply has no interest. Or, they do actually have a significant other, but sex, how hot their partner is, or how horny they are, isn’t their internal monologue. I don’t even care if it’s unrealistic, it’s annoying to read.
And, you know, giving men male characters who aren’t thinking about sex all the time can be good, right? Right?
3. Manly warrior men who also write poetry
A.K.A Aragorn, Son of Arathorn. Just give me more Aragorns, period. This dude is either covered in filth, blood, guts, and the last 30 miles of rugged terrain, or singing in Elvish at his own coronation while pink flower petals fall. A man can be both, and still be straight.
A man can also drink Respect Women juice, you know? He ticks off all the boxes—he’s gentle when he needs to be, not afraid to hide his emotions, kind to those who are vulnerable and afraid and need a strong figure to look up to, resolute in his beliefs, skilled and knowledgeable in his abilities without being arrogant or smug, and the first boots on the battlefield, leading from the front.
4. Characters who are characters when no one is watching
This is less a specific type and more a scene that doesn’t get written enough. This whole point comes from Pixar’s Cars. I. Love. This. Movie. It’s not Pixar’s best, for sure, but this is my comfort movie. The best scene, one that’s so unique, is when Doc (aged living legend) thinks he’s alone when he rolls out onto the dirt race track and comes alive tearing around the oval.
This character’s unbridled, unabashed glee and euphoria at proving to himself that he’s still got it, when he’s completely unaware of his audience, is perfection. Not enough credence is given to characters to just… enjoy being themselves. He’s not doing it to prepare for the climactic race, he’s not doing it for the plot, he’s doing it just to do it, not even to prove Lightning wrong—just for himself.
Give your characters a “Doc Racing” scene. Whatever their skill is. Maybe they’re a dancer, a skater, a swimmer, a painter, sprinter. Just let your character love being alive.
5. Characters whose neurodivergence isn't “cute”
A.K.A. Lilo Pelekai from Lilo and Stitch. Really, her relationship with Nani is peak sibling writing. But Lilo herself is just so realistic with how she interacts with the world, how she interprets her relationships with her so-called friends, how she organizes her thoughts and rationalizes what she can’t quite understand, and how friggen smart she is for an… 11-year-old?
But she’s not “cute”. As in, she wasn’t written by generic Suits who were trying to cash in on the ND crowd by writing what they think will sell, but also making her juuust neurotypical enough to still be palatable by the rest of the audience. Lilo’s earnestness is what endears her to everybody. But also, she doesn’t get a free pass for her behavior, either. Her “friends” aren’t forced to accommodate her and Nani isn’t written as the cold-hearted villain for trying to discipline her.
6. Straight male characters with female friends
Am I double-dipping a bit here? Yes. While I completely understand how tempting it can be, this type of character is in dire need of exposure and representation to prove it’s possible. No weird tense moments, no double-glances when she isn’t looking, no contemplations about cheating on his girlfriend (and no insecure jealous girlfriend either). Just two characters who enjoy each other’s company and are able to coexist in a space and be in each other’s spaces without hormones getting in the way. Peak example? Po and Tigress from Kung Fu Panda.
Let these two rely on each other for emotional strength in times of need, let them share inside jokes, let them have a night alone together at a bar, at home, cooking dinner, getting takeout, talking on the patio in a porch swing… with zero “will they/won’t they.”
7. The likable bigot
I’m actually on the fence with this one but it’s something I also don’t see done often enough and I’m adding it for one reason: Bigots aren’t always obvious mustache-twirling villains and the little things they do might seem inconsequential to them, but are still hurtful. So showing these characters is like plopping a mirror down in front of these people and, I don’t know, maybe something will click. They don’t have to be MAGAs to be dangerous, and only writing the extremes convinces the moderates that they aren’t also the problem.
Example: I have a “friend” who recently said something along the lines of “I have lots of gay friends” followed up shortly by “I don’t think this country should keep gay marriage because it’s a slippery slope to legalizing pedophilia.” You know. The quiet part being that she *actually* thinks being gay is as morally abhorrent as being a pedo. But she totally has lots of gay friends. Including one who was driving her during that conversation. (It’s me. Hi. I’m apparently the problem, it’s me.)
She’s absolutely homophobic, but the second she stops announcing it, she’s a very bubbly person. She’s a ~likable~ bigot and thus thinks she can distance herself from the more violent ones.
8. The motherly single father
I say “motherly” merely as shorthand for the vibe I’m going for here. “Motherly” as in dads who aren’t scandalized by the growing pains of their daughters, and who don’t just parent their sons by saying “man up boys don’t cry”. Dads who play Barbie with their kids of either gender. Dads who go to the PTA meetings with all the other Karens and know as much if not more than they do about the school and their kids’ education.
Dads who comfort their crying kids, especially their sons. Dads that take interest in “feminine” activities like learning how to braid their daughter’s hair, learning different makeup brands, going on nail salon trips together. Dads who do not pull out the rifle on their daughter’s new boyfriend and treat her like property. Dads who have guy friends that don’t mock him and call him gay. Dad who does all this stuff anyway and is *actually* gay, too, but the emphasis is on overly sensitive straight men’s masculinity here.
Wholesome dads: a shocking amount of single-parents to female anime protagonists.
9. The parent isn’t dead, they’re just gone
Treasure Planet is an awesome movie in its own right, but what’s even better? This is a Disney movie where the parent isn’t dead, he’s just a deadbeat who abandoned his son and isn’t at all relevant to the plot beyond the hole he left behind for Jim to fill. The only deadbeat dads Disney allows are villains and those guys are very vigorously chasing an aspiration, that aspiration just doesn’t include quality fatherhood. Or motherhood. Disney has yet to write a deadbeat mom, I’m almost certain.
I just wrote a post about the necessity of the “dead parent” cliche, but what is perhaps more relatable because it’s more common, and what earns even more sympathy and underdog points for the protagonist? The hero with the parent who left. Then there’s a whole extra layer of angst and trauma available when your hero can now plague themselves with the question of if the parent leaving is their fault. Death is usually an accident. Choosing to abandon your kid is on purpose.
10. Victim who isn’t victim-blamed or told by their friends (and the narrative) to forgive their abuser
Izuku Midoriya lost so much support from me the moment he told his friend, bearing the consequences of domestic violence across half his face, that Midoriya thinks he’ll be ready soon to forgive his abomination of a father. I am firmly in the “Endeavor is a despicable human and hero” camp and no I’m not taking criticism. I audibly gasped when I heard this line and realized Deku was serious. Todoroki needs friends like the Gaang to remind him that he's allowed to hate the man who's actions caused the burn scar across his f*cking face.
I understand that the mangaka apparently didn’t anticipate the vitriolic backlash toward Endeavor during his debut and reveal of his parenting tactics but the tone-deafness of telling a fifteen year old with crippling emotional management issues and a horrible home life that his abusive dad in any way deserves and is entitled to forgiveness on the grounds of being related is disgusting.
Take it back further to a more famous Tumblr dad: John Winchester. Another despicable human who got retroactively forgiven by his sons after his death in a “he wasn’t so bad, he really did try” campaign. It’s one thing if the character believes it, it’s a whole different matter if the narrative is also pushing this message.
Katara is a perfect example: She lets go of her grudge for her own peace of mind and stops blaming Zuko for something he had no hand in, stops blaming him simply because he’s a firebender and he’s around to be her punching bag. She doesn’t forgive the man who killed her mother, because that man doesn’t deserve her forgiveness. Katara heals in spite of him, not because of him, and had she let him off the hook, she would have gotten an apology for getting caught, not for what he did (which is exactly what happened).
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chanafehs · 16 days ago
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isabela's veilguard outfit is literally insane like a bikini that's it??? what world are we living in that her design from da2, a game that came out 12 years ago, is somehow less racist and misogynistic than her 2024 design??????
Am I surprised by this design choice? No. Am I disappointed? Absolutely.
If I’m not mistaken, Isabela is the first woman of color we have as a companion - specifically the first Black woman as a companion - and she is arguably the most sexualized character within the entire series. Like even going back and playing da2 it feels like everyone makes a comment about her sex life or literally slut shames her (Aveline and Anders I’m looking right at you) - even one of the voice actors called her a whore on Twitter. They don’t even seem committed to having her be Black either instead just racially ambiguous which sucks.
(I want to make it clear I am speaking as a non Black person but if any Black Dragon Age fans would like to add their own thoughts to this post please do so!)
I really want to know the thought process the devs had about this design behind the scenes because throughout all the jokes about bikini armor and making the armor “practical”, we still got this?? How????
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The only argument I can see taken place in defense of this is having some kind of under water themed mission (in her concept art for dav she’s underwater with some of our companions) but if that were the case: why is she wearing gold armor. It makes no sense. She would sink right to the bottom and don’t give me some excuse about using magic. Also, you don’t need a bikini to swim underwater.
I’m upset also because the creators keep trying to say that games can’t exist without some politics and having more options to be inclusive to marginalized identities is paramount (these are both good things) but they consistently fall short when it comes to Orientalism, Racism, and Anti-Blackness. It only sends the message that these games are geared for white audiences, not us. It’s 2024 how have we not retired the bellydancer adjacent armors.
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pretzel-box · 3 months ago
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Tags: Comedy, Some Fluff, Streamer AU, GN!reader x Human! Sebastian
Words: 1,9k
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"Pressured_Solace has started a stream. Click here to watch."
The blue notification button caught your eye as it popped up on your desktop, the usual alert signaling that your favorite streamer was live. A thumbnail of the game he was about to play accompanied the message, and without hesitation, you clicked to join the stream.
“Jellycatfished joined the stream!”
“Is that the real one??”
“Bet it's another faker looking for donations.”
A grin spread across your face as you slid your headphones over your ears, adjusting them for comfort as you leaned back in your gaming chair. Solace hadn’t noticed your arrival yet, too focused on setting up the stream and chatting casually with the early viewers. Hearing his deep, familiar voice through your headphones sent a pleasant shiver down your spine, filling you with a warm, giddy excitement. Pressured_Solace was your absolute favorite streamer—witty, thoughtful, and with a voice that could melt butter. Like you, he streamed without a face cam, leaving his appearance up to the imagination of his audience, which only added to his charm.
“I think… yeah, I’m all set. Everything’s good,” he mumbled into his microphone. You could hear the sounds of items shuffling around and the clatter of coffee mugs on a wooden desk in the background. Then he leaned closer to the mic, his voice dropping to a playful tone. “Test, test, 1-2, 1-2. Can everybody hear me?”
The chat lit up with eager replies—greetings, questions, and a flood of emotes scrolling by at high speed. The sound of his chuckle was like music to your ears as he tried to keep up with the barrage of messages. You could feel his excitement; it was the same rush of emotions and adrenaline that coursed through your body when you streamed.
“Alright, just a heads-up,” he continued, his tone teasing. “I got a new microphone, and I haven’t fine-tuned all the settings yet. So if you hear anything other than my voice… well, that’s just proof I’m not a robot.”
His joke made you laugh out loud, and without a second thought, you hit the like button to show your support. This was classic Solace, always with that sassy vibe and the funny comments right up his sleeve.
You moved your cursor again, hovering over the donation button as you carefully selected the amount, leaning forward with excitement as you typed a message to accompany it. Money wasn’t an issue for you—you had sponsorships, collaborations, and a well-paying side job as a secretary at a company called Urbanshade. So you took the liberty of spoiling yourself a little by supporting your beloved streamer.
“Jellycatfished has donated $1000. ‘You're telling me you are not an AI that will take over the world, Solace??’”
The automatic voice read out your donation, and Solace burst into laughter, probably shaking his head in amusement. “Welcome back, beloved Jelly. How many times do I have to tell you not to donate so much, silly?” His words were playful, but there was a certain softness in his tone, a hint of affection that made your heart flutter. Knowing that your favorite streamer had noticed you always brought a smile to your face. “But seriously, thank you, Jelly, for the donation,” he said warmly. “I appreciate your support—although I’m starting to think you’re secretly trying to buy my loyalty.”
You laughed, quickly typing back into the chat, “Maybe I am! How else would I get the attention of the coolest streamer online?” A quick moment of embarrassment filled you as you suddenly regretted your message, was it too cringe? Too much?
Solace chuckled again into the microphone, and you could almost hear the smile in his voice as he replied, “You don’t need to buy my attention, Jelly. You’ve always had it.”
The chat exploded with a flurry of reactions, hearts, and playful comments. You could feel a blush creeping up your cheeks, even though you knew he couldn’t see you. This was the magic of streaming—the hidden identities, the mystery, the fun banter. It was your little escape from reality, and you loved every second of it.
Just then, a notification popped up on the screen.
“Pressured_Solace has invited Jellycatfished to a private match!”
It was an invitation to a combat pvp game that grew popular in the past few days, blowing up on social media. It became one of your favorite things to stream, and Solace knew that.
Your heart skipped a beat as you glimpsed at the sudden invitation. A private match? With him? You quickly accepted the invitation, feeling a rush of adrenaline and excitement. As the game loaded, Solace spoke again, his voice filled with that familiar teasing tone. “Alright, Jelly, let’s see if you’re as good in-game as you are at throwing money around.”
You laughed, feeling a surge of competitive spirit. It wasn’t the first time you played with him and surely not the last. “Bring it on, Solace. I’ve been practicing.” This was the last message you typed before the loading screen disappeared.
The game started, and the playful banter between the two of you continued over the ingame voice chat, filled with laughter, friendly taunts, and unexpected plot twists. The chat was loving it, spamming comments like “OMG, this is the collab we didn’t know we needed!” and “Ship them already!”
As the game loaded into the next round of the PvP arena, the tension between you and Pressured_Solace crackled like electricity. The map was a sprawling labyrinth of narrow corridors and open spaces, perfect for ambushes and quick escapes. You took a deep breath, fingers flexing over the keyboard, ready to bring your A-game. The chat, that was open on your second screen, was buzzing with excitement, filled with a mixture of support and playful taunts.
"Let’s go, Jelly! Show Solace who's boss!"
“Team Jellycatfished for the win!"
“Pressured_Solace may be good, but Jelly's got that magic touch!”
You couldn’t help but smile at the encouragement flooding in. The support from your fans always gave you that extra boost of confidence, especially when it came to facing off against someone as skilled as Solace. You knew he was good—really good. But you weren’t about to let that intimidate you.
“Alright, Jelly,” Solace’s voice came through your headphones, smooth and teasing. “Let’s see if you can keep up.”
“Oh, I plan to do more than keep up,” you shot back, your voice light and playful. “I’m coming for you, Solace. How about a bet?”
“A bet?” He chuckles. “Sure.”
You started to smirk as an idea came to your mind. “If I win, I get to wish something from you.” It took a moment for Solace to reply, he was definitely teasing you by pretending to think. “Fine, but if I win, you're the one that has to fulfill a wish.”
“Deal.”
The match began, and you immediately took off, sprinting down a side corridor to grab some resources. You knew the map well enough to anticipate the power-ups and health packs that would spawn in certain locations. If you could get to them first, you might stand a chance.
But Solace was a step ahead. As you rounded a corner, you were met with a hail of bullets, forcing you to duck behind a crate. You could hear Solace chuckling through the mic.
“Nice try, Jelly, but you’re gonna have to be faster than that,” he taunted, his confidence evident.
Your heart raced as you peeked out from behind the crate, firing off a few rounds in his direction. He dodged easily, taking cover behind a wall. The chat was going wild, cheering you on, urging you to give it your all.
“Come on, Jelly! You got this!”
“Don’t let him intimidate you!”
“Use the power of the Jellycatfished!”
You grinned, feeling the adrenaline pumping through your veins. You quickly reloaded and made a break for it, dashing toward the nearest cover. You had to stay on the move—staying in one place too long would make you an easy target. Solace’s aim was deadly accurate, and you needed to keep him guessing.
But every time you thought you had a plan, he was already two steps ahead. He moved through the map like he was born there, seamlessly transitioning from offense to defense. You managed to get a few hits in, but he was quick to recover, always staying just out of reach.
“Having fun yet, Jelly?” he asked, his tone light but focused.
“More fun than you can handle,” you retorted, launching a surprise attack from above, dropping down from a higher platform. Your ambush caught him off guard, and you managed to land a few solid hits before he rolled away, retaliating with a well-placed grenade that forced you back.
The chat erupted with excitement.
“YES! Go, Jelly, go!”
“That was epic!”
“Don’t let up, Jellycatfished!”
Despite the cheers, you could feel the pressure mounting. Solace was clearly better, his skill evident in every move he made. He was precise, calm, and knew exactly how to control the flow of the game. You, on the other hand, were running on adrenaline and instinct, trying to keep up with his calculated strategies.
And then he made his move. In a swift, decisive maneuver, he cornered you in a dead-end alley, cutting off your escape routes. You fired desperately, but his shots were faster, more accurate. Before you knew it, your health bar was dwindling down to nothing.
“Looks like this is the end, Jelly,” Solace said with a hint of amusement in his voice. “Any last words?”
You grinned, a surge of determination flooding through you. “Yeah… don’t underestimate me.”
With a final burst of energy, you lunged forward, launching one last, desperate attack. It was reckless, but you had nothing to lose. You managed to land a few more hits before Solace finished you off with a well-placed headshot.
“Defeated! Pressured_Solace wins the match!”
The screen flashed the results, and the chat exploded with a mix of cheers and playful groans.
“GG, Jelly! You put up a good fight!”
“Solace is just too good!”
“Rematch! Rematch!”
“That was intense!”
Breathless, you leaned back in your chair, a smile tugging at your lips. “Not bad, Solace. Not bad at all.”
“Not bad? I’d say that was a pretty solid victory,” he replied, his tone teasing. “But you did put up a good fight, Jelly. I’m impressed.”
You laughed, feeling a warm flush of pride despite the loss. “I’ll get you next time, Solace. Mark my words.”
“I’m counting on it,” he said with a grin you could practically hear through the screen. “I always enjoy a challenge from you.”
The chat continued to buzz with excitement, fans from both sides celebrating the epic showdown. Even though you didn’t win, you couldn’t help but feel a sense of satisfaction. You may have lost the match, but you had fun, and more importantly, you had earned Solace’s respect. And that, in itself, felt like a win.
As the stream continued, you and Solace bantered back and forth, the playful rivalry only fueling the chat's excitement. It was moments like these that reminded you why you loved streaming so much—the thrill of the game, the support of the community, and the chance to connect with someone like Pressured_Solace, even if you didn’t know him outside of this virtual world.
But there was always tomorrow, and another game to be played. And who knows? Maybe next time, the outcome would be different.
A message plopped up at last, Solace texted you privately over the streaming platform.
“Alright Jellykitten.” He obviously joked by giving you such a silly nickname. “Time for my wish, prepare for your doom!”
“What is it, Solace?”
“Share your discord tag with me.”
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sp0o0kylights · 3 months ago
Text
Part One / Part Two / Part Three (You Are Here)
Complete Thing on A03
Sure enough, Jason Carver had brought a priest. 
The idiot himself stood next to the guy, smugly grinning like a hunter posing with his prized buck, a small crowd already gathering. 
Opposing them was Michael Wheeler, hands planted on Hellfire’s table and back up like a pissed off cat’s, mouth moving faster than Eddie thought possible.
He couldn’t hear what Wheeler was saying. 
Frankly did not want to know what Wheeler was saying, and could only do his damndest to intervene before Mike tanked the situation entirely. 
Gareth and Jeff flanked him, both tense as hell. Neither had backed down though, standing tall and holding ground even as Jason pulled more and more people into his little spectacle. 
Lucas and Grant on the other hand, were standing off to the side.
They weren’t cowering exactly, but both were definitely wincing as Gareth opened his mouth to add his own two cents. 
Given the scowl on the priest, it was probably something nasty, 
‘Fuck.’ Eddie thought, teeth clenched, as Jason drew out his arms, making an even bigger production for his little audience. ‘Fuck, fuck, fuck!’ 
The worst thing of all? 
Dustin managed to reach the group before anyone else did. 
Wheeler and Emerson might have low charisma, but Dustin had a particular combination of snark and a know-it-all attitude that really pissed off authority figures. 
(And Eddie would know, given he was the reigning champion of pissing off authority figures.) 
He did, however, slide in right in time to hear the priest respond. 
“I don’t care for your tone, young man. Jason here has some concerns over your club and I have to agree, what I see is quite,” The guy paused, jowls jiggling as he looked over their table, clearly eyeing Hellfire’s logo. “alarming.” 
 At least wasn’t an actual sermon.
Not yet, anyway. 
Eddie came up right inbetween Mike and Dustin, intending to make himself out to be the new target for all to aim at.  
There was an art to making yourself the sole owner of everything evil in this world, and Eddie had learned it all, trial by fire style.  
“Carver is full of--” Mike snarled, and thankfully was cut off—not by Eddie, or the hand he’d just clamped onto Mike’s shoulder—but by Harrington. 
Who sauntered right up as if he was joining everyone for dinner, and not walking into a circus act.
“Hello Father.” Harrington said, voice warm and welcoming.  “Would you like some of our cookies? We have a sample platter.” 
“Oh--Steve!” The priest blinked, actually blinked, that he was startled to see Hawkins’ golden boy appear next to him. “I’m sorry but no. I’m ah, here for other reasons.”
He paused so long it was nearly comedic before tentatively asking; “ Are you with this table?”
Like the guy couldn’t see the same Hellfire logo plastered across Steve’s ridiculous jock chest. 
Eddie opened his mouth to give a resounding no, Hellfire shirt or not--when Mike of all people put an elbow into his side. 
As if Eddie was the one who needed to be silenced.  
“I am.” Steve put an arm down on Dustin’s shoulder, squeezing it in a way that looked like fond encouragement (but what Eddie was pretty sure was actually a warning in the same way the hand on Mike’s shoulder was.) “I came to help out my friends and fundraise.”
Then he beamed, face lighting up with the full Harrington charm, giga watt smile and all. 
Now the priest just looked awkward. 
“You’ve apparently been fundraising for what I have been told is a…Satanist Club?” 
It was hilariously delicate, how the priest said it. Like now that a respectable member of Hawkins was here, he had to be more careful about what words he used. 
Eddie would have interrupted then.  Retake the reins and do what he did best in terms of making everyone forget about everything but him--except Carver was rounding on Harrington, and well.
He was always a fan of the rich eating each other. 
“You cannot seriously be with these--these,” Jason’s eyes darted to between him and the priest, before physically reigning himself in. “hooligans, Harrington!” 
“I’m sorry.” Harrington said, and whatever Jason had been expecting to get hit with, it wasn’t “good ol’ boy” southern charm. 
He blinked, taking on the air of a kicked puppy who couldn’t understand why someone would be so mean as he glanced around the crowd.  “I think I'm a little lost here.” 
Jason clearly wasn’t prepared for that either. 
“What?” 
“This table is for a storytelling and math game.” Steve spoke slowly, in the same way one explained things to a toddler. “You have to roll dice and add the numbers up to do anything."
“It’s not a game, Steve.” Jason spat back. “It’s an evil trick made to tempt the susceptible minds of children to the dark arts!” 
Personally, Eddie was amazed Carver even knew the word susceptible let alone be able to properly use it in a sentence. 
(He tried to open his mouth to say so, and once again got elbowed, this time by Gareth. 
The look he gave his younger friend could have melted steel beams.)
“That’s what this is about?” Harrington slid his arm off Dustin's shoulders, leaning back to look at the priest and the people around them in a show of blatant disbelief. “You think the nerd club is related to satanism?” 
It was Eddie's own tactic--arguing that D&D was “using academic skills” and “making math fun!" not that Hellfire had ever been successful using it.
Of course, they weren’t Hawkins golden boy either. 
Jason sputtered. 
“It has monsters and--demons in it! It makes children do spells and sign over their souls!” He flung a hand out, for the first time acknowledging Eddie by pointing at his shirt. “Just look at that! It’s awful!”  
"Hey." Eddie said, hand going over his very well drawn dragon.
“I once had to stop an argument about how much weight a wooden bridge could hold.” Steve countered, hands moving to his hips. “I only got them to stop by agreeing to take the kids to a library so they could look it up.” 
He squinted, in Carver's direction, deadpanning; "I take it you think the library is evil now too?"
“The name of the club is called Hellfire!” Jason shrieked, sounding more like an angry teakettle than anything dangerous. 
“Look I get that it sounds scary,” Steve said, the tiniest hint of pity entering his voice, “but they’re trying to make math problems and English essays sound cool. It’s the same reason Father John here calls our annual haunted house Hell House, isn’t it? So people go in it to begin with?” 
Harrington turned to look expectantly at the priest, and Eddie had to admit it was an excellent way to both pander to the guy and sound like Jason was making a big deal out of nothing. 
Perhaps, he’d stay quiet after all. 
(Even if it went against Eddie’s entire being to do so.)
“Well, yes, but--” Father John had clearly picked up on the fact he was losing this particular argument, but plowed forward regardless. “Those activities are supervised by the church…” 
“This is evil Harrington, and you should know better to promote it.” Carver tacked on, like this was a two bit comedy sketch. 
“When I played it we just saved some poor town from a bad guy who set it on fire.” Steve rolled his eyes. 
Then he leaned in, converting his voice into a stage whisper that somehow projected it, giving the impression that everyone around them was listening in on a secret. 
“The doctor said it was a really good way for Dustin and Erica to process the mall fire. He’s a specialist--my mother managed to convince him to fly down to help all the kids who got hurt.” 
Eddie was 100% sure that was total bullshit, but the mere mention of Harrington's mother had seemed to have an effect on the people around them.
 Like Steve had invoked the name of an old but beloved God, not always benevolent but definitely memorable. 
“She’s always been a champion of helping when you can.” Steve spoke to the priest, like they were having a conversation between just the two of them. “Encouraging people to volunteer and helping fundraise.”
“She has been." Father John said, in the kind of instant way one does when they don’t want to offend a very large donor.  "Tell your mom I look forward to her coming back from her--ah, trip.”
 With an awkward glance to the table, he added; “...I suppose I don’t see how math comes into play?” 
“Oh it’s right from the start. Hey Jeff, come here, show Father John how you have to do a bunch of calculations and stuff to make a character.” 
“Ah--right.” Jeff sprung to life, moving around the table to Steve.
“We uh, we start with this character sheet…” 
“Eddie Munson runs the club.” Jason interrupted, before Steve could get Jeff to going.
“He’s right there! Does he look like this whole thing is just an innocent board game?” 
This was a last ditch effort, and it was clear by the chattering that had started circling amongst their audience that everyone knew it. 
Unfortunately, it was a good one.
This was the downside to making yourself a target. Once a bad guy, always a bad guy--particularly in the eyes of the PTA. 
“Munson?” Harrington dismissed with a scoff. “He’s harmless.” 
Which was news to most of their audience given the amount of attention Eddie suddenly had on him, but it was fine. 
He was used to the disapproving stares and glares, and gave his best award winning smile in response. 
Jason looked at Harrington like he’d lost his mind. 
“He has skulls on his fingers for fucks sake!” 
“Jason.” Steve admonished, in a perfect mimic of an upset southern mother. “Language.” 
Carver's jaw dropped, face purpling in rage.
Steve ignored him, turning back to the Priest. “I don’t know what's gotten into him but I’m sorry Jason’s wasted your time, Father.” 
“Munson is a drug dealer!” And ah, here came the Hail Mary move, Carver's one and only trump card.
“We all know he’s a drug dealer, and he’s using this--this game, to give drugs to kids!”
“Really?” Steve turned. “Lucas, what happens if I ever catch you smoking weed?” 
Lucas answered instantly. “You’re going to make us run laps at five in the morning.” 
“For a month.” Dustin added, with an exaggerated shudder. 
It would have been too much--except his disgusted face sold it. 
“Eddie’s just loud and wants to be a rockstar.” Harrington said, like this he was harmless.
No one on Steve's side of things had ever thought of Eddie as harmless.
 “I’ve babysat these kids for years and Eddie was a huge help in making sure no one in high school messed with them.” He continued, like they were some sort of team or friends even.
(Like Eddie hadn't been at Harrington's throat all day, pissy and defensive.)
“We have a real bullying problem right now. Funny enough,” Steve’s nailed Jason with a look, “I keep hearing that it’s coming from the basketball team.” 
“What are you implying?” Jason asked darkly. 
“Just that it’s funny how nobody got caught fighting when I was team captain.” Steve returned. 
God the man was such a bitch. Eddie kind of wanted to kiss him a little. 
Okay, more than a little.
“I get you have some kind of beef with Munson, but let’s not drag a bunch of people into it. Especially not Father John.” Harrington was playing up to the mothers around him now, dismissing Carver entirely as he did so. “He’s a busy guy.”
“Very.” Said Father nodded solemnly. “I do not appreciate being pulled into a high school squabble.” 
Jason’s mouth swam through shapes, words stuttering out of it. “This isn’t, thats not--”
“We can talk about this after church on Sunday.” Father John interrupted, the finishing blow to Carver's little show.
“You came all this way, at least have a cookie on us.” Steve said with an appeasing tone, reaching an arm back behind him.
Quick on the uptake, a cookie appeared in his hands. 
He offered it out to the priest, who took it happily.
"Okay, who wants cake!?” He called, in a clear and obvious dismissal of Jason. 
Who stood there, like he couldn’t believe what just happened. 
His eyes slid to Eddie's, fists clenched tightly at his side, hatred pouring off him so strongly one could almost taste it.
Eddie winked at him.
(Unknown to him at the time, Jason had also looked at Steve--and Steve would wink too.)
xXx
Steve Harrington, who Eddie had been an absolute ass all day too, had looked Jason Carver, a Priest and half of Hawkins in the eye and announced that he, Eddie Munson, was a good person at heart.
It made Eddie want to vomit a little when he thought about it too hard.
“I know this is horrible timing,” Robin said, sidling up as the crowd finally dispersed, “but I really, really need to talk to you.” 
Eddie turned, head full of far too many thoughts and ready to tell her such, when he caught sight of Buckley's face. 
Was reminded, by the sheer nervous, ‘horse about to bolt’ vibe, that he owed it to Robin as a fellow queer not to be a dick about her accidental outing.
Even if all he wanted was to preen in the wake of Carver’s defeat. 
‘See Mothers of Hawkins? Your own golden boy just gave me his stamp of approval!’ 
A mental image that immediately changed to Steve Harrington’s name stamped on his ass and dammit he had to get ahold of his thoughts before he fell down rabbit holes like this--!
“Back there, at the stairs,” Robin started, voice dropping low, and Eddie didn’t miss the way her eyes kept seeking out Steve, like he was some kind of safety net--which he probably was. “What um--what did you hear?” 
It took a lot of guts to come talk to him, knowing what he'd overheard--particularly given they'd just fended off the church.
He'd never exactly underestimated Robin Buckley, but then, he'd never expected this level of badassery from her either.
“Eddie?” Robin prodded again, chewing hard on her bottom lip.
“Sorry, distracted.” Eddie waved a hand behind himself. “Not everyday the King decides to defend your honor to a priest.” 
With a little bow, he offered his elbow out to her, a clear signal to take it and let him escort them away from unwanted ears.
In a show of bravery, Robin took his elbow and let him lead, even as she frowned up at him, looking like she was about to say something.
Likely it was in defense of Harrington, but Eddie had been interrupted enough for one day. 
“You and His Highness over there really should be more aware of your surroundings." He started, voice low. "Lucky for you, you’re among friends. You and Dorothy both.” 
He reached a foot out, tapping Robin’s own. 
Right on top of a doodled pair of tits. 
Robin let go of his elbow and glanced down, before flinging her head right back up, panicked.
"I--"
“If you’d like I can pretend I never heard a thing.” Eddie interrupted, dropping his voice into the gentler tone he reserved for delicate conversations.
People were always surprised by the lengths he went to make sure someone was comfortable--but then, people also forgot how often Eddie heard things he shouldn’t. 
People didn't take drugs just for fun, after all.
“Or I can offer a friend of a friend discount on my wares,” He put a finger to his lips, miming smoking with one hand while he opened his vest with the other to flash the little pink triangle pin that sat inside, announcing his own sexualities status.
“and we can, say, discuss the differences between radical and social feminism while admiring the fine forms of Susan Sarandon and Peter Hinwood?”
The smile he gets is two parts relief, one part genuine delight and Eddie grinned right back at her, flicking his vest closed.
“I did not take you for a Peter Hinwood type.” Robin said it hesitantly, still waiting for the other shoe to drop. “Thought you’d find Tim Curry’s…acting skills, more to your taste.”
“In the case of Rocky Horror? I am Tim Curry.” He announced, loud and proud (well for this kind of conversation at least.) 
He was rewarded by the tension finally melting out of Robin’s shoulders. 
(This, Eddie reflected, is what he should have been doing this entire time, instead of getting tied up in knots over Harrington and turning into some kind of non-conformist tyrant.) 
“Do you actually know the differences between social and radical feminism?” Robin challenged, braver now, and Eddie knew then and there he’d been successful in assuring her her secret was safe.
That she was safe, with him.
“Guess you’ll have to find out.” Eddie said, giving a playful nudge to her shoulder. 
Baths in the laugh he gets for it, and for the first time today feels like he’s finally on firmer ground.
They chatted for a moment longer, making a loop on the very outskirts of the gym, voices hushed when it came to things that small town ears shouldn’t overhear--but of course, Robin couldn’t just leave things at that.
“Hey Eddie?” 
“Yeah?” 
“Can you do me one more favor?”
“Anything for you, my favorite feminist.” 
For the first time since this conversation started, Robin managed to sound firm. 
“Stop referring to Steve as a King.” 
She rushed ahead, anticipating being cut off, and thus Eddie is hit with a wave of words, none of which he’d ever thought he’d hear in relation to thee Steven Harrington. 
“He’s working really hard to get away from it, the whole King thing and how he used to be. I don’t know what all he did to like--you guys,” She flapped her hand in the general direction of Hellfire, “and I know he wasn’t an innocent bystander, but I kinda realized over the summer that I blamed him for a lot of things that were in my own head, and that he wasn’t--he was never as bad as I thought he was and he's still trying to make it up to me anyway.”
Robin trailed off, seeming to try and piece out what she wanted to say next without giving away the whole farm. “It’s not some act, Eddie. Steve’s really trying to change.” 
Which yeah.
Eddie could see that, now. 
Maybe not before but…
“Okay.” He said, after a long, long moment. “No more King Steve. Got it.”
The smile he got for that also felt like a victory, even if it was wrenched out of him.
xXx
Two hours and a dispersed crowd later, Eddie found himself once again stuck in his own head. 
The facts were thus:
Steve Harrington was a good dude. 
He used his good dude-ness to save Hellfire from a literal priest, right smack in front of God and Principal Hairy Ass both
All of Hellfire actually liked him 
According to Robin Buckley, Steve was entirely fine with “all us triangles” quote/unquote 
And;
Eddie was jealous.
He was self aware enough to admit it, alongside the fact that Jason Carver aside, maybe Eddie had been the villain today instead of Steve. 
Which meant he not only owed Harrington an apology, but he owed it to both of them to work out his own stupid shit before it blew up in his face and cost him all his friends.
(He’d have called this move “pulling a Harrington” before today but now that feels mean, which Eddie supposes signals he’s grown as a person or some shit.) 
So now he sits on Steve’s beemer, knowing the move will likely antagonize the ex-jock but equally knowing he’s planning on jumping off the car the second the guy comes near, and that the move itself will get Harrington to listen to him the second he’s done supervising whatever Hellfire’s youngest is doing.
(Eating leftover cookies like the older members are as they finish packing up, Eddie assumes.) 
Ducking out like he did had allowed him some much needed time to think things though. Figure out what he was going to say--without an audience present.
He’d apologize publicly if he had to. But being vulnerable is hard, and given the way his friends had been acting, Steve isn’t the only person he owes an apology to. 
For now, he’ll begin here, without an audience. 
Eddie doesn’t get to plan for long--only gets to rehearse a few lines of his little spiel when a pointed cough jerks him back to reality. 
There stands Steve Harrington, a fat wad of cash in one hand and a box in the other.
Like a man sent to the gallows, Eddie leapt off the beemer, squaring his shoulders. 
He could do this.
 Apologize-- and mean it. 
Not that Steve gave him the chance to. 
“The guys told me to give this to you.” He said, holding out the cash. Then he took a breath, like he was preparing to go to war, and added; 
“I know you weren’t happy with me being here, and you probably don’t want this, but Dustin said you really liked cinnamon brownies so I made you some.” 
The box was now held out alongside the cash, proof that Steve had tried to start this whole thing off on the right foot. 
Eddie stared at it, then at Steve. 
Felt the guilt chew on his gut just that much harder.
“I have been shitty to you all day. Why are you giving me this?” 
Steve shrugged. 
“To be fair I didn’t exactly make it easy on you either. You said jump and I said ‘watch this’.” Steve laughed, a small, almost self depicting sound. “Dustin’s been on my ass all day about it.” 
Of course he had. 
“Mine too.” Eddie admitted. “It's his tone, I swear."
“Yes!” 
Carefully, Eddie reached out, accepted the box and the cash. 
“Thanks by the way. For the stuff you said about me earlier.” 
Steve grimaced, cheeks tinting a (lickable) red. “Yeah sorry, I--”
“No not--not that stuff.’ Eddie said, mentally hauling his thoughts back in line, fiddling with the cash. “The stuff about being a good person. No one’s uh. Said that. About me.”
Not except for Wayne, but Harrington wouldn’t know nor care about Eddie’s uncle. 
Steve shrugged. “I didn’t say anything that wasn’t true.” 
He’d argue that, except something was off. 
It took Eddie a moment to place it--that the wad Steve handed over was way too big for the little bake sale they’d just attended. 
He tucked the box under his arm, quickly counting the stack with a smoothness only drug dealers and bank tellers could manage.
“It’s all there, I promise.” Steve told him simply, but without judgment. He sounded like he expected this and that didn’t sit right with Eddie either. 
Not that he could do anything about it because he’d just counted up didn’t make any sense. 
Not trusting himself, Eddie stacked it back together, before counting it all again. He was faster this time, trying to figure out among all the ones, fives and tens how the hell they had managed to sell that many cookies. 
Particularly considering the most expensive thing was one of the cakes and he’d watched Steve sell it for fifteen dollars. 
So why were there three twenties sitting in the stack? 
“Either you up charged the absolute shit out of someone’s mom, in which case I congratulate you, you sneaky devil,” Eddie said slowly, “Or you put extra cash in here.” 
Steve blushed properly this time. 
Eddie zeroed in on his face, watching as Steve rubbed the back of his neck with his hand, trying to pull his charming mask into place.
He didn't quite manage it.
Hadn’t even been wearing it before now, Eddie realized suddenly.
This entire conversation Steve had a realness to him that Eddie had never really seen. 
Had maybe not wanted to see, from someone like Harrington. 
“I don’t know what you mean.” Steve protested, like a kid who’d been caught with a hand in the cookie jar. “That’s what we charged.” 
“You are a terrible liar.” Eddie accused, hand trembling. “We can’t take this, man. This is a almost two hundred dollars.” 
Way more than what they’d need for Gen Con. It was enough to get them two fuckin’ hotel rooms! 
“If It helps any, I didn’t do it for you.” Steve’s blush slid into something more genuine, as he nodded his head to where Hellfire was spilling out of the gym doors, laughing and shoving one another. 
“They deserve to have a good trip.” He added, eyes fond as he watched Dustin and Mike squabble over how to fold Hellfire's banner.
It made his whole face soften, the harsh features of his jaw turning into something that was so adorable Eddie wanted to bite through it. 
“Do you want to come?” Someone said, and it took both Steve’s startled look and a second long pause for Eddie to realize that someone was him.
Stupid, stupid, stupid-! 
“To the convention?” Steve asked, looking doubtful. 
Pity that Eddie was already nodding, like his brain and his body were at a total disconnect.
Maybe aliens had finally taken him over. Or a demon. 
(Demonic possession could frankly explain a lot about today, Carver’s weird little power play aside.)
“Dude you don’t even like me.” Steve said. “Why would you want me to come along?” 
“I dunno Harrington. All of Hellfire seemed to like you, and not just my freshman.” Eddie countered easily, gliding right over the fact that he himself did like Steve.
Way more than he should, and that right there was half of Eddie’s problem. 
“They have pretty good taste in things.” He waived a hand, as if this wasn’t a complete 180 from how he’d acted all day. “I could understand if you didn’t want to slum it with us nerds though.”
Steve rolled his eyes. 
“I’ve been slumming it all day with you nerds, if you haven’t noticed.” 
“Yeah? What’s your verdict on us?” 
“Not as bad as you could be.” 
Eddie tilted his head back and laughed. “High praise from the King!”
He felt bad immediately after, and made himself promise to be more mindful about Robin’s ask--but  thankfully Harrington didn’t take it hard. 
(Habits, Eddie knew, were hard to change.
Took a lot of careful attention to change. 
He had a long road ahead of him, and he hoped this little olive branch put him a few miles down it.) 
Steve awarded him a small smile. “I haven’t been the King for a long while, man. But if you guys have an opening, I think I wouldn’t mind being a knight or whatever.” 
“Ste-eeeve Harrington, defender of the realm.” Eddie nodded once, decisively. “I can see it.”
He tucked away the cash, and thus missed how Steve looked weirdly contemplative at that. 
Raised his head and stuck out a hand. 
Tentatively, Steve took it. 
“Welcome to the club, Harrington. We meet on Fridays. Bring snacks.” 
“Cookies okay?”
“Going by Gareth’s judgment, they’re more than okay.”
Eddie smiled and Steve smiled back, and God how he hated how fucking cute Harrington’s face was. 
Particularly since he now got to think of the guy as “Steve” without feeling weird about it. 
As in his possible, potential, friend Steve.
What a fucking trip that was. 
“Oh, and Steve?” He called, the thought hitting him as Steve turned to welcome the group making their way to the beemer.
Steve had let his hand fall, turning to open the front door of the Beemer with a cocked eyebrow.
Eddie flicked a finger out, lightly tapping the Hellfire logo. “Tell Lucas I’ll get him another shirt. That one’s all yours, big boy.” 
If there was a pink hue to Harrington’s cheeks, he was blaming sunburn. 
(Two months, six days, and one meddlesome asshole named Henderson later, and Eddie would find out that Steve had in fact, been blushing.
He’d be furious at Dustin’s involvement, if it hadn’t directly led to Eddie finding out Steve’s blush did in fact go down his chest.
And his happy trail.
And his--
Well.
Men do not kiss and tell. 
Not to fucking freshmen, anyway.) 
THERE IS A GEN CON, "THERE WAS ONLY ONE BED BECAUSE DUSTIN IS A MEDDLESOME SHIT" BONUS BUT it's on A03 cause it was long enough to be its own post and I wasn't gonna add it to this one. You can read it here LINK
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dynamightsfave · 22 days ago
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bakugo katsuki—interviews
bakugo katsuki fucking hates interviews. in every shape and form. public conferences? "i did my fucking job. the building crashed down because the base sucked ass. that's not my fucking fault" one on one interviews? "why the fuck do they have so many damn questions about my methods? let them try and do what i do!" talk shows? "if you're not gonna ask me about my job, i don't know what the hell i’m doing here, my personal life is my goddamn business. also, if i wanted comedy i’d go to the fucking circus, at least the clowns wear their actual uniform instead of shitty suits"
safe to say, dynamight is every interviewer's nightmare. he's a wonderful and attentive person off camera (he’s still an asshole, but a nicer one), but when you start asking him questions and place a camera on his face, the brass defensiveness, one of the things that lingers from his stubborn teenage years, shines through. that and that mouth that curses more than a sailor in their golden years ever has. there's offers to take him of course, being in the top ten heroes ranking of not only japan, but the whole world. he's mostly partnered up in these interviews, so there's someone to lead the talking and answer for him when he doesn't want to give into "the stupidest fucking question he's had the misfortune to hear". 
red riot and shoto are the ones that are usually designated as his babysitters, but other old classmates have appeared onscreen with him as well. even deku, now a teacher, has made special features. but there's never much demand for an individual interview with pro hero dynamight, and if there ever is, bakugo usually rejects them without looking much into it.
which is why, his secretary was very confused when the mention of a last attempt at a talk show made his boss perk up rather than frown instantly. his lip didn’t instantly curl with a groan and his red irises didn’t meet the back of his skull. instead, he curiously eyed the schedule placed in front of him, and gave a curt nod in thanks when he was done. ryu developed a sense of uneasiness that took over his system. surely that was a sign of the end of the world. but he couldn’t really say anything, pinky and chargebolt recommended the interviewer and swore it would go well. maybe they were right? they needed it too, dynamight hadn't appeared on many public events lately. so there's that, now he just had to pray bakugo didn’t fuck it up.
and that brings us to right now, with dynamight taking a seat in front of you and the public’s applause dimming. the tension that fills the air lingers in the audience, and for once, bakugo and his interviewer seem to be completely at ease. ryu can’t help to think to himself that this is yet another sign that the world is about to end, and he wonders if he should call up his family to say a final goodbye. for now, maybe it’s better he focuses on what’s in front of him.
"great explosion murder god dynamight!" you smile at him, as if he was a friend you’re glad to see again, "so glad you could make it!"
you have that magnetism that makes every guest comfortable around you, familiarity being the base of your show. it’s a big part of why it became so popular, the charming host that interacts with their audience and speaks their mind in such an easy way.
katsuki smirks, chest a bit puffed and fingers drumming the armrest.
"sort of didn’t have a goddamn choice, did i?" while his response only makes the people watching tense more, you only chuckle, nodding as if you understood like nobody else.
"we’re our managers’ puppets aren’t we? either way, wonderful to have you," and goddammit, you never sound insincere, "these days it’s hard to have a minute of great explosion murder god dynamight"
"you know what they say, villains don’t rest. and if they don’t rest that just means us heroes have to work twice as hard as them" did he just answer without cursing? oh the world definitely ends today.
bakugo maintains eye contact with you while he lounges on his seat like he owns the place. he’s made hundreds of interviewers and others shrink with that attitude of his, but from the looks of it, you’re not only not one bit bothered by it, but you almost encourage it. your arms flex as you lean in towards him, agreeing with him.
"all right, since i don’t want to waste much of that precious time of yours..." eyes twinkling, you could even say teasing—dare i say flirty—, you tap a small melody onto your notebook with your pen, "let’s dive right in to the questions! promise this won’t be long. first off, i want to solve a doubt i’ve had for some time now"
he arches a brow, accepting the challenge. there’s the same amusement in his eyes that yours have, it sends chills across the room. it’s so weird to see the bakugo katsuki being not mean to someone that isn’t a little kid or a polite fan.
"i’ve said it a couple times now, and i have to admit it’s a bit of a mouthful. “great explosion murder god dynamight”. why that name? how on earth did you come up with it?"
it’s funny. you say it as if it isn’t a mouthful. quite the opposite, it rolls off your tongue like quick, flowing as if it’s escaped a million times, a prayer you know by heart. bakugo rolls his eyes, similar comments follow him practically every day everywhere he goes since he made the name up. he’s built up skin to them, not that they ever bothered him, he’s pretty proud of his hero name. some might say too proud.
"it’s a reflection of everything i am," he winces after a second, "maybe not the murder part."
"i do hear die is one of your favorite words tho"
"yeah well, it’s good to let the emotions out or whatever the hell. i try not to say it as much anymore, people say it’s rude or some shit," his hand makes a fast motion, as if to sweat it off, he really doesn’t give a damn, "anyway, the name’s like that because it had to embody how fucking awesome i am"
"ah, that makes sense," you nod along, not bothered by the curses, "a loud and bright name like your explosions. it does suit you"
at the compliment, the smirk returns to his lips, a small huff with it. he shuffles around to sit higher, now getting an idea of how this interview is going to go. katsuki finds that he doesn’t really mind it, at least the questions are off to a good start. and the host... well let’s just say he likes this one.
"i know, i picked it myself," he states, and you can’t help but laugh at how sure of himself he is. reminds you of a 6-year-old, not a single ounce of doubt in his body about how cool they are.
"would you say it was inspired by something else? maybe a hero you look up to?"
"nah, ‘t was all me," liar.
"i see. a unique name to say the least. but on the topic, is there any hero that you look up to? someone you aspire to be like. other than, i'm sure, best jeanist"
"obviously," he repeats, "but i mean; every kid and their goddamn mother has dreamt of becoming all might, he was n.1 longer than anyone. i’m sort of a basic bitch that way. when i was little i wanted to be like him, so i followed that dream until i made it real. and now i push myself to be as great as he was and more. plus ultra and all that bullshitr"
"wow. sounds like hard work," he grunts in agreement, and you purse your lips, "we all agree all might is a one of the greatest symbols we have, must have been incredible to be able to study under him. you mentioned the school’s motto. can you tell us about that? the ua days?"
katsuki smiles, his eyes drifting away to his hands. you can’t help but think he looks rather handsome, reminiscing his high school.
"in one word: it was fucking insane. he brought a lot of insight about what to expect in the actual field, and how to treat with bystanders—the little motherfuckers—, and he was always pushing us to do our best. he’s the sort of person you just know cares about what he’s doing," he explains, "our homeroom teacher, mr. aizawa was also very much like that, even though he didn’t look it. ua students are lucky when it comes to teachers. but they’re all ungrateful snotty brats"
it’s the first time bakugo katsuki has ever said something nice in public, even if it has some mean side dishes (wouldn’t be something bakugo katsuki said otherwise). at this point, it’s just you two in the room. no lights, no cameras, no audience, not even the questions you’ve jotted down in your notebook. only a conversation between two people. katsuki wonders if it’s a you effect, and he figures it must be, because he’s never as comfortable as he is talking to you. it comes so easy.
you smile, and it takes everything in you to not reach and put your hand on his arm at his words, the reminder of all the people watching in the room and through the cameras a dying reminder in the back of your mind. you like having him here, and you frankly don’t understand why other hosts dread his visits.
"sounds like a wonderful experience. i’ve talked to others from your course and they all speak of it with so much fondness, just like you. even with the hardships you had to endure," you clear your throat, voice dropping to barely a mutter. even the mic strapped to your blouse has trouble picking it up, "but i’m sure you don’t like thinking of them, i know i don’t. so, i know you’ve said all might and eraserhead are big inspirations, but do you have any other people you admire?"
you know you’re pushing your luck. your tone is far too friendly to be considered professional now and he’s not one to be heartfelt on camera. but if you could just get him to confirm what cellophane and shoto said last week... what you just know is the truth, but dynamight is a bit too proud to admit. you can see it in the way he looks away and puffs his cheeks to blow air.
"i mean, obviously, i’m incredibly grateful to best jeanist and edgeshot, they fucking saved my life," his cheeks grow the slightest bit of pink under your intense gaze. he almost chuckles as you nod entranced and edge just a tiny bit closer awaiting for the true answer. he guesses he might as well indulge, so, with a much lower tone, he continues, "and ya know, in class there were others that were pretty good too. not as incredible as i am, but close enough. if i had to pick any, maybe shitty hair and the dumbass deku. i guess"
screw the lights. your smile is blinding. it shines so much bakugo suddenly doesn’t feel like the answer was practically yanked from his throat. this is too much for his rearranged heart.
"that’s funny, they speak pretty highly of you too," you giggle. your eyes clash, and the small smile that forms on his face is instinct, he can’t control it. one, two, three.
"of course they fucking do. they better, else i’ll crush their bodies," he huffs, snapping back to his position before he was gobsmacked by you.
"all right, i’ve just got a couple more questions before we let you go," you get back on track too, despite the heat on the back of your neck, "uhm... oh yeah! well i guess you’ve answered this already, but just in case. you said red riot and deku were people you admired as heroes, i take it they are also the easiest to partner up with? i know pro hero deku is out of commission at the moment, but back when you still worked together"
dynamight actually thinks about this one. he furrows his brows, and his weight shifts on the sofa. he hums as his hand strokes his chin.
"well, it depends on the job. generally, i do like to partner up with them, we understand each other very well, as do everyone form our class. the time we spent training with each other pays off. so yeah, they’re easy to work with. but also, the half ‘n half bastard is quick to respond to what i do, and ponytail is a great strategist when it comes to infiltration or a mission that takes planning. the damn rabbit gets on my nerves a lot, but we make a good team. she should start thinking about retiring though, before she starts dragging me down"
"it’s lovely to hear the heroes of japan are so tight and coordinated. i must say, hearing you praise them is refreshing," your lip gets caught in your teeth in an attempt to stop the growing smirk, but your eyes betray you.
"oi, don’t misinterpret what i’m fucking sayin’. they’re all still pains in my ass, each worse than the last one"
"uh huh... okay, last question. if you weren’t a hero, what would you be?" that takes him aback.
"fuck you mean? i was always gonna be a damn hero. i don’t know. maybe one of those people that handle bombs in the army or some shit like that," he shrugs, but then a beat passes, "a firefighter"
"final answer?" you arch a brow. he grunts an affirmation, "o-kay! well, it’s been a pleasure to have you here, i hope we did not waste much of your time, but you’re free to go now. i appreciate that you didn’t shout"
he chuckles, following your steps as you get up and circle your table to get to him and say goodbye. the audience is clapping for you two, ryu is releasing the breath he’d been holding all throughout the interview, and the camera people are preparing to shut off. you reach him, and just like his smile before, his next actions are pure instinct. even more, they’re almost a routine.
his hand reaches for your waist, and he effortlessly pulls you closer, placing a gentle kiss on your forehead. now, in this routine, it’s not common that you tense up. usually, you wrap your arms around him and nuzzle into his chest. you look up to him, eyes wide, and it takes one millisecond for him to realize what he’s done. he curses under his breath, and you laugh.
"welp, there’s that. no more hiding this," the stunned public is so silent they hear your whispers, "see you at home?"
katsuki gives you that low laugh you love, squishes your waist, and nods.
"yeah, see you at home"
ryu dials his family to say his goodbyes as his boss steps off the stage and the audience recovers from the shock. he prays the call gets through before the world suddenly explodes.
luckily, the world doesn’t combust, and he lives to see the heart magazines with your image on their covers and headlines screaming about japan’s favorite talk show’s host and potty mouth’s newly discovered relationship.
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strwbryien · 1 month ago
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「 ᝰ.ᐟ entry 03: ADDRESSING THE SITUATION⭑.ᐟ 」
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“hey, everyone. this feels... really strange to do on camera, not gonna lie. i’m used to just being a voice behind the screen, but here we are. so, um, i just wanted to address everything that's been going on.”
“i know a lot of you have seen what happened last stream, and i’m sure it was a shock. it definitely wasn’t supposed to go down that way, and i really hope i haven’t let any of you down.”
“streaming has always been something i love, and i hope this doesn’t change how you see me or what we’ve built together. i appreciate all of your support more than you know, and i hope we can keep going strong. thank you for sticking with me through this.”
kayekumi: we love you no matter what! face or no face, you're still the best streamer! ezravish: this doesn’t change anything, we’re here for you always <3 hartz4u: you’re so brave for addressing this head-on, we’re all behind you kumism: you’re beautiful, kumi!! no need to hide! da1suk4e: the real-life kumi is just as amazing as the one we knew! no disappointment at all
"wow... i don’t even know what to say. you guys are seriously the best. i was so nervous about this whole thing, but seeing your reactions just makes me feel so relieved. thank you, really. i don’t deserve you all.”
“it means the world to me that you’re still here, supporting me like this. i was scared i’d lose some of you after everything, but knowing you’ve got my back makes me so happy.”
“i promise i’ll keep doing what i love, and i hope we can keep having fun together—face or no face! you’re all amazing, and i’m so lucky to have you. thank you, from the bottom of my heart."
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synopsis:
IN WHICH—you, although faceless, are a very famous streamer known as KUMI. you were streaming as usual, playing games and interacting with fans. but when you're about to exit the stream, you accidentally pressed the wrong button that led to you opening your cam and showing your whole face to your audience. this wasn't supposed to happen, no ! so you panicked and quickly ended the stream. numerous screenshots circulated on twitter, which broke both the fans and the internet. this reached a certain someone, SCARAMOUCHE, your rival in streaming. when the said boy saw the trending photo, he almost fell off his gaming chair. because—lo and behold! KUMI was actually [name]?! now who is this [name] in his life, if you may ask? she's the girl that scaramouche has been admiring from afar in real life! quite shocking, right? have i told you that he’s also been sending you anonymous love letters? oh well...
notes ᝰ.ᐟ
— i've been gone for so long, i feel so bad ಥ⁠╭⁠╮⁠ಥ — i honestly don't know what i was yapping about in kuni’s letter LMFAO i hope it's at least understandable — ik it's short TT, but i'm currently working on part 4 rn! hopefully, i'll be able to post it soon!
ꪆৎ taglist
(if ur @ is not in bold letters, it means that i can't tag you)
(taglist are unfortunately closed)
@imnotyizhuo @kazufavor @najaemism @simonisferal @lovelypadisarah @eternallykira-143 @yourfavoritefreakyhan @yuminako @035814 @squigglewigglewoo @lxkeeeee @blvdmrcnry @wth121 @lloovvv @3lectraheart @lovemiyae @danhenglovebot @heusalettle @automaticpatroltragedy @kyon-cherri @lalalaloveallmydays @musings-of-miss-j @ilxandra @lazy-sanns @vixialuvs @bananasquash @kochothehoe @lily-lmao @shutingstar @sketcheeee @minhosprettywife @crimxeorcremeexistspeacefully @kinanahana @featuredtofu @tamikahoshiko @jayzioxx @kleeboomed @saechiro @shyentsmissingink @poemzcheng @rifran @projectsfantasy @yejiswifex @peachystea @vi0let-writes @sicuit @hee-jinn @6blxe @viannasthings @trulyylee
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milswrites · 8 months ago
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Hobbies Part 11.
~ Azriel X Reader
Summary: In an attempt to keep Azriel away from Elain, Rhys sends him on a sabbatical to the Day Court. With a lot more free time on his hands Azriel needs to find something to keep him occupied. Unfortunately he meets Y/N who has the annoying habit of not staying away. Can she teach him that there’s more to life than he thought?
Grumpy!Azriel X Sunshine!Reader
Series masterlist
Warnings: mentions of sex
“Will you stop fussing? You look divine!” Azriel praised as he walked up to where Y/N was nervously fretting over her appearance in the mirror. His soothing hands meeting her waist as he pulled her backwards to rest against his chest in a comforting embrace. Mesmerised eyes taking in the reflection before him, Y/N wrapped perfectly in his arms as if she was the missing piece of what was the unfinished puzzle of Azriel’s life.
He placed a tender kiss against her cheek, moving his hands to appreciatively brush them along the fabric of her dress. Another marvellous creation of her own design. “You don’t happen to have a matching top for me, do you?” He asked, eyes still locked onto her angelic face in the mirror as he delicately planted sweet kisses along her neck. A twinkle appeared in her eyes as she pouted in faux disappointment, “I’m afraid not. I must say I’m surprised, I didn’t take you as the kind of person who would want to wear matching clothes with his lover in front of his family.”
“Well it’s a good job you’re not only my lover but my mate as well” he playfully bit the lobe of her ear, the blushing woman squealing in the tight grip of his arms as she tried to escape his affectionate nibbles. Azriel pulling her back into him, refusing to let the woman go, amber eyes moving back to the mirror to admire the happy couple smiling back at him in the reflection. Stomach doing somersaults at the love shining in Y/N’s eyes as she looked up at the male.
Azriel sighed heavily as he rested his chin onto Y/N’s shoulder, “Are you sure we can’t just stay here? I can think of many, much more scandalous, things I’d rather do with you than go and see my family.”
“And aren’t we so fortunate that we now have all the time in the world to do said scandalous things. We can try every sinful thought that crosses through that dirty mind of yours.”
Azriel’s grip on Y/N tightened at her words, his eyes growing dark as she sent a dangerously sensual image down the new found bond. She smirked at his growing predicament pressing against her, pleased at the power she held over the male, before she teased, “oh but what a shame. I think if we tried to escape your family any longer they might come and bash down my door and I’d rather not have an audience when I’m showing you just how much I love you.”
“Let them watch” he groaned, smile dropping from his face as she pulled away before he could act on his desires.
Y/N began to pace the room anxiously, repeating everything Azriel had told her about his friends, “So there’s Rhysand and Feyre, and they have the baby right?”
“Nyx yes.”
“And then there’s Cassian and Nesta. Then Mor, Amren and… oh gosh who was it? Ella? Eleanor?”
“Elain.”
“Yes Elain! Ok.”
“You’ll be fine,” he reassured the fretting woman, just as he had been doing for the past six hours since Rhysand had sent them the invitation, “as much as I know I’m going to dislike it, I don’t think there’s a single person who could meet you and not fall unbelievably and entirely in love with you.”
Y/N stopped her pacing, flushing at Azriel’s words as she moved towards him to place her smaller hands in his, “well, unfortunately for them I only have eyes for my big grumpy mate who would no doubt show them who I belong to.”
“I’m not grumpy, I just don’t like people” Azriel defended with a scowl as a giggling Y/N pecked his cheek.
“Ok” she released a deep breath, giving Azriel’s hands a gentle squeeze, “I’m ready. Let’s go now before I change my mind.”
“The beds right there” Azriel pleaded as she rolled her eyes at his hint, playfully slapping his chest as he chuckled. The male drew her into a crushing embrace, sneaking in one last kiss on the top of her head before his shadows engulfed them. A storm of darkness surrounding their hold as the shadows whisked the loving couple away to the Night Court. To Velaris the City of Starlight.
~~~~~
The pair stepped out from the shadows into an empty cobbled street. A slight chill in the air causing Y/N to shiver at the unfamiliar climate, Azriel made a mental note to get her some more weather appropriate clothes for whenever she was to join him in the Night Court.
Azriel watched on with nervous interest as Y/N took in her new surroundings. Having never been to the night court, he prayed she would find Velaris just as magical as he had done. Hoping that maybe, just maybe, she may be looking at these streets as a place she would one day like to call home.
They hadn't yet had the chance to talk about how their relationship would work with the two hailing from different courts, but Azriel couldn't help but let his mind drift to sweet thoughts of the pair living together in a small cottage overlooking the Sidra. Once more dreaming of a perfect domestic life with the woman, only this time he could dream of them doing it all together as mates.
Y/N was beaming widely as usual, her bright eyes absorbing the view of the picturesque street. "Oh Az, it's beautiful! It looks just like something from a fairytale!" she exclaimed, Azriel releasing a relieved sigh at her open appreciation.
"Yeah?" he asked shyly, "Think you'd like to come back to visit me here?" He needed to hear the words from her lips so Azriel could be free to dream about the future he so longed to have.
Y/N laughed at his anxious question, finding it silly how he would think a place would change her opinion of the man, how it would change how deeply she felt about him, "Azriel," she smiled, pulling both of his hands into her own, "you could live in a literal ditch, and I would still visit you every opportunity I have. Because I love you Azriel, not your Court. Although it is a very beautiful one...you may find it quite difficult to get rid of me."
Now feeling silly about his previous worries, Azriel leaned forward to press a soft kiss against Y/N's lips, joking as he pulled away, "I'd wait to meet my family first before you say things like that, you may change your mind on that fairly quickly."
"I'm sure if they're even half as good as you are I'll love them" she replied, pulling the male in for another sweet kiss whilst they were still in the pleasurable bubble of their own company.
"Don't say I didn't warn you" Azriel teased as he began to lightly push Y/N in the direction they needed to go, his large hand resting protectively on the small of her back.
~~~~~
Azriel already knew this was going to be the most embarrassing night of his life. He had already prepared for that. What he hadn't prepared for was the impatient nudge of Rhysand's voice in his head telling him to hurry up and meet them at Feyre's art studio in the Rainbow. Azriel had expected a sit down meal, maybe even a trip to Rita's for a few drinks if the night went well, but of course it seems his brother has something more nefarious planned.
The shadowsinger, who already wished he was still holed up in the Day Court cottage with Y/N, sullenly led his mate to where the rest of his family were waiting for the pair. Y/N failed to notice his bitter mood, she was too preoccupied with gazing at her surroundings in awe as Azriel dragged her through the winding streets by her hand, trailing behind him like a lost puppy.
Her excitement over being in a new court steadily increasing, until by the time they had made it to the Rainbow Azriel was sure if she were any happier she'd likely combust from the enthusiasm.
He held the door open for her as they entered the studio, Y/N's eyes lighting with glee as she noticed where he had taken her. The inner circle were all waiting inside, turning from their conversations to face the newly together couple.
"Oh my cauldron you're beautiful!" Cassian cried overenthusiastically earning an eye roll from his mate due to his antics. Bounding over to the pair he mockingly wipes faux tears from his eyes before gripping Y/N by her arms and pulling her into the biggest bear hug he could muster. If Y/N were startled by his actions she didn't show it, instead she reciprocated the hug, grinning at the large man as she spoke, "You must be Cassian, I've heard so much about you."
The General gasped as he put her down, turning to yank his grumbling brother into a hug as he teased, "Oh Azzie, I knew you always talked about me!" The rest of his family began to approach the pair, exchanging welcoming hugs (which were less bone-crushing than Cassian's but just as warming) and polite greetings.
Azriel watched his family interact with the woman and he couldn't help but think that if Y/N could be likened to anything it would be the sun, her glowing energy forcing anyone near her to fall into a natural orbit. Her presence acting like gravity, drawing everyone towards her. They had been in the room for all of two minutes and Y/N was already animatedly chatting away with Feyre as she admired her studio, the two women acting as though they had been friends for centuries.
Whilst she was distracted, a grouchy Azriel hovered over to Rhysand, whispering sharply in the male's ear so not to be overheard, "What are we doing here?"
"I showed Feyre the painting from Y/N and she wanted to plan something that would make her feel comfortable, isn't that sweet Azzie?" Rhysand smirked at Azriel's bulging eyes, clearly finding his shock entertatining.
"You showed her the painting?" he grit through his teeth, cheeks turning red at the thought of the High Lady seeing something that felt so personal to Azriel.
"Oh...I showed everyone the painting" Rhys replied as if it was obvious, pointing over to where a flushed Y/N was smiling gently as Feyre held said painting in her hands as she talked about it to the woman.
"You actually hate me" Azriel concluded, eyes now drifting around the room in fear as he noticed the number of blank canvases standing on easels. Feyre's brilliant idea obviously being that they all had a family painting session.
"Don't worry brother," Rhysand grinned as he wrapped a comforting arm around Azriel, "I brought drinks!"
~~~~~
The concentration in the room was palpable. Well, from some of the members. Azriel, Feyre, Amren and Cassian all working in a focused silence, tongues absentmindedly poking from their lips. Elain was also opting to work quietly, unreadable eyes sometimes flickering in the direction of the shadowsinger and his new love. On the other hand: Rhysand, Mor, Nesta and Y/N were all happily chatting away as they gossiped whilst painting their creations. Wine flowing to their heads as they giggled to each other whilst occasionally stumbling on the tall wooden stools they were sat on.
"I have to say," Rhysand mumbled a confession as he squinted at his painting, "Azriel gave us quite the fright when he disappeared from here - twice may I add. He was acting like a feral beast, we all thought you had to mean a lot to him for him to be acting like that."
"Well," Y/N sighed contentedly, affectionate eyes meeting Azriel's from where he sat next to her, "I suppose finding out you're mates would do that to someone."
A chorus of surprised cries flooded the room. The inner circle chiding their friend for not breaking the news to them sooner. Sweet Elain squeaked in shock, spitting out a large gulp of wine all over her canvas. Meanwhile Cassian shouted, "I knew it!" and began to list all the unrelated reasons as to why he believed he had always known that Azriel found his mate during his stay in the Day Court.
"Mates?" Elain quietly sounded, eyes locking onto the floor in disappointment. Before she could say anymore her sister chimed in, Nesta leaning over to place a friendly hand on Y/N's own as she congratulated the couple, "That's wonderful news. We're really happy for you Azriel, you two make a wonderful pair."
Having been sat in a nervous stupor most of the night, praying that Y/N and his family got on well, Azriel flashed Nesta a crooked smile, thanking the woman for her kind words. "Yeah, we do" he replied earnestly, eyes moving to rest on his lovely mate.
"Well cheers to that!" Cassian bellowed as he raised his full glass in the air, liquid sloshing messily down his sleeve.
~~~~~
"What is that?" Y/N asked, squinting inquisitively at Cassian's masterful creation, "A horse?...A blue horse?".
Cassian frowned, a paint-stained hand coming to rest on his chin as he observed his painting alongside the woman. "It's supposed to be Azriel" he admitted in disappointment, "I guess I can't quite get the face right.” Y/N laid a supportive hand onto the general's shoulder, lying through her teeth in an attempt to make it feel better, "Oh of course! You're just forgetting the wings that's all!"
The General gasped at Y/N's words, beside himself that he forgot to paint his brothers wings, he eagerly lunged for his palette so he could complete the portrait of his, eyebrows still knitted together as he focused on painting the lines as steadily as he could.
Y/N moved past the male with a chuckle, wanting to see what other wonders Azriel's family had created. She came across the most exquisite piece, a lovely garden which radiated life, beautiful flowers of all shades decorating the scene. Gasping in awe at the tranquility of the scene, she turned to the artist to profess her appreciation, "It's beautiful! I've never seen a garden like it!"
"Oh...Thank you," Elain quietly answered, "It's of my own one."
"You have a garden? Oh that's wonderful, I bet the painting doesn't even do it justice! You must be really talented if it looks anything as good as this."
Elain cracked a small smile of appreciation, "Thank you, you can come see it sometime if you like. The next time Azriel brings you up maybe?"
"I'd love that!" Y/N replied joyfully, having always had a love for gardens which had only increased by a tenfold since that night with her mate. Azriel tentatively approached the pair, slowly walking towards them before coming to a stop at Y/N's side. "Everything ok here?" he nervously asked, eyes flittering between the two.
"Yes!" Y/N beamed, resting her head against his shoulder, "I was just telling Elain how magnificent her painting is, and she's invited me to come see her garden next time I'm here!"
Azriel relaxed his muscles, not even noticing how tense he had been standing, he flashed Elain a grateful smile, eyes full of apologies for not telling her what had unraveled during his time in Autumn, for not giving her the closure she deserved, "Thank you Elain."
The woman grew a mischievous smile, pulling a sniggering Y/N to her side and into a one-armed hug, "I don't know why you're thanking me Azriel. It's Y/N who I invited, not you."
~~~~~
It had been a wonderful night. Meeting Azriel's family and being allowed a glimpse into his life here in the Night Court filled Y/N with an indescribable warmth she has failed to experience in her life until this moment. Still admiring the artwork they had created tonight, Y/N slowly approached Feyre's canvas, tears welling in her eyes at the sight before her.
There, huddled together in the center of the detailed painting was the inner circle. Arms wrapped around each other's figures, connecting them all in one large hug. Laughing faces stared back at Y/N, their eyes all overflowing with carefree humour as their dazzling smiles met her own.
And there, joined in the familial embrace, was Y/N. Locked tightly in a beaming Azriel's arms. Her smile as equally wide as his as her eyes twinkled with an uncontrollable joy.
Y/N had never had any family and spent most of her life growing up alone and uncared for. But here, wide eyes staring at the familiar woman in the painting who was surrounded by Azriel's loving family, Y/N allowed herself to dream of that family one day being hers as well.
"Oh wow that's amazing" Azriel's voice sounded from behind Y/N, his chin coming to rest on her shoulder as he admired Feyre's hard work. Y/N failed to hold the sob that broke from her mouth as she settled into Azriel's tender hold. "Hey...hey what's wrong?" Azriel asked worriedly, shifting Y/N in his embrace until her face was pressed against his chest. He murmured sweet nothings into her ear to calm her until she was able to speak, swaying them gently in an attempt to comfort the sniffling woman.
Once Y/N had settled enough to speak, she craned her neck back in order to look at her mate, eyes still red and watery. "You have the most amazing family" she wept, unable to stop the tracks of tears rolling down her cheeks.
"We do" Azriel replied simply, agreeing with her statement. He placed a small kiss on her forehead before beginning to gently wipe the tears from her face with his hands. Turning Y/N until she faced the painting once more, back nestled into his chest. "You know I'm not actually related to any of them through blood" Azriel pointed out, his low voice rumbling against her back, "But we found each other and built something special between us. Something that means more to us than just family."
Y/N still sniffled slightly but she was deadly focussed on listening to every word that came from Azriel's mouth as he continued, "Some bonds run deeper than blood. And you're a part of that now. You're one of us."
"Yeah?" Y/N asked hesitantly, fingers coming to brush up against her euphoric form in the painting. Azriel hugged her midsection tightly, gently pulling her back so her hand dropped from the piece, "don't go trying to rub yourself off. You're stuck with us now."
She laughed through her tears, opting to rest her hands on Azriel's encircling arms instead. Happy with the home she had found with the male.
Allowing the final few tears to fall, she breathed out deeply, allowing her overwhelming emotions to expire.
"What did you paint?" she asked curiously, realizing she had now seen every painting in the room except her mates.
"Come on," he smiled, holding out a hand for her to take, "I'll show you."
~~~~~
Y/N stared at the painting which glared right back at her. Absorbing the piece in it's entirety as she tried to figure out what it was.
It was beautiful, a swirl of misty yellows and glittering golds, whirling together on the canvas. Colours blending in harmony as they glided across the surface. The picture had a depth to it, sparking a desire inside her chest to try and climb into it, to see just how far she would make it into the glowing storm, wondering what kind of nirvana she would discover at the end of it.
"Its incredible Az! But...what is it?" she daren't remove her eyes from the painting, afraid that the spiritual journey it was taking her on would be cut short.
"It's you" he replied, his proud amber eyes burning into his own work, "what you make me feel, what the bond makes me feel. Every stroke of the brush, every whirl of paint, it's all you."
His words held truth, as Y/N stood and observed each flowing line that moved along the canvas, she felt a strange sense of intamacy with the artwork. As though Azriel had torn out her soul and plastered it across the surface. Her soul which Azriel had recognized before she had, her mate knowing every part of her in it's entirety.
"I see you for what you are" Azriel stated, bond already revealing your thoughts to him, "Just as you see me."
"Cauldron Azriel!" Cassian's shrill voice severed the consuming aura of the moment Y/N and Azriel were sharing, "Feyre needs to start giving you some lessons cause let me tell you that is one ugly-"
Epilogue
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Notes: Hehe if you want to do what I did picture Azriel punching Cassian for that!
Everybody can thank the lovely @charlineraven for speaking this extra part into existence! (I'm so glad you did! 💕💕)
Just the epilogue to go now!
Also for all those expecting a big Elain confrontation I’m sorry! It felt wrong to belittle a woman just for having a crush (come on! Who can blame her I love Az so much)
Taglist:
@thelov3lybookworm @minnieoo @iluvyewman-blog @going-through-shit @laughterafter @amysangel @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @aaronwarnerobssessedmylove @honeybeeboobaa @justvibbinghere @willowpains @tele86 @mysticalfuncollectorus @mybestfriendmademe @starryhiraeth @gorlillaglue25 @moonlwghts @darling006 @anuttellaa @serendipityx150 @xxxalicerogersxx @that-one-little-soybean @scatteredstardustt @naturakaashi @nyx-the-alien @lostinpages13 @namelesssav @dreamlandreader @fightmedraco @maxmouse001
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ccieatchildren · 3 months ago
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I’m sure we’ve all seen by now Steve Blackman’s reasoning for Five/Lila stating:
“I felt that Five had to have a love story.”
And how it shows how this man somehow has such a deep fundamental misunderstanding about his own characters. How he helped create the first three seasons of this show and doesn’t realize that
This is Five’s love story.
Umbrella Academy the show wouldn’t exist without Five’s love. The whole plot and story is it.
He is the catalyst of all the plot lines while his family is the center of all the story beats. His love is the instigator for all the events of the show simply because he chooses to do everything possible in the hope that it will save his loves.
It’s not like this was even a subtle idea because Five literally states it himself multiple times over the series!
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I just don’t understand how you can get it so wrong.
He creates the Commission in hopes of regulating the timeline so his family won’t get obliterated from existence, tattooing himself with the potential solution to rewriting the universe so they can all live happily one day.
He survives the apocalypse all on his own, when there was no real reason to, just because he believed he could get back to his family, spending 50+ years developing the math to one day do so.
He joins the Commission and murders and maims and manipulates in the desperate attempt that he might have a chance to go back and see/save his family.
He spends the first time he sees his family after over six decades not with them, but rather searching for a way to stop their deaths, sending them all through time when it doesn’t work.
He runs himself ragged stopping apocalypse after apocalypse just for them.
And when he loses all hope, accepting the kugelblitz, he is content to know he is doing so with his family.
As much as this show is about the whole family, ultimately, imo, this is Five’s story about his grueling quest to save the family he loves.
Because otherwise this show wouldn’t exist without him and the rest of the characters would just be decorations in the rubble of a world long gone.
So to say bro needed a love story— he doesn't say romance, but love story— is so durna, like what??? I guess if you really wanted him to have a romance you could do that, but there were many better options than the wife of someone he deeply loves, something he would never do.
(Not to mention all the real world implications of the romance with the actors, production really was waiting for him to be legal ಠ_ಠ)
Also I don’t think it’s a coincidence that many fans view Five somewhere under the aro/ace umbrella (pun intended).
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Now, because of this misconstruction the ending of the show also suffers.
Brushing over all the mind boggling things the real ending says about abuse, its victims, and growing from it (which is actually like how did no one look at that and think hmm maybe this isn’t right for the story we’ve been telling), it also misunderstands love. It tells the audience that love isn’t worth it, in a show… about love. Not just Five’s but Hazel/Agnes, Viktor/Sissy, Allison+Claire, and more. How all your pain and suffering and tribulations for those you love are stupid and useless and cringe.
But y’know what, Mr. Blackman, I think you’re cringe for that absolute bonkers bananas ending.
And that’s why having the solution to the series being that Five should have never jumped in the first place would have been the best ending.
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Making it so that the only solution to save the whole universe be that Five stay with his family, with those he loved— what he had been trying to do for the whole show— would have been the perfect conclusion to the story. It would show that all he had to do was stay, because that’s all they ever needed, that’s all he ever needed.
AND IT WOULD MAKE LOGISTICAL SENSE.
Five and Viktor are well confirmed to have been the closest ever since they were young. And Five (doesn’t matter if he’s the now Five who lived through the shows events or the young one who ran off) would most certainly be a supportive figure in Viktor’s life. He’s smart, for one, and it wouldn’t be a stretch for him to figure out what was really going on (especially with his hatred of Reginald) and help Viktor that way. But even if he doesn’t, when they grow to adults and Viktor naturally doesn’t take his pills or his power starts showing, Five’s love and care for his (closest) brother would most certainly help prevent the apocalypse. Especially since if Five and Viktor are close, as they grow older, I feel like the others would grow closer as well, maybe not the same degree, but they would be more willing and supportive of Viktor in the end (I feel like Season 1 shows us how at the end of the day the siblings do care for Viktor, but they were just too late, so this time they wouldn’t be).
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Through the subway we see the timeline where he jumps still exists, so that should mean there is a way for him not to do that. His jumping (and the siblings he brings along) is what creates the paradoxes and the "need" for the Commission. So by him not jumping, problem solved.
This might come at the cost of the current versions of the characters, but I think if they can make the developmental journeys they did once, I think they can do it again, and have a happy ending.
(Also the Jennifer incident wouldn’t happen either bcs of Five or just bcs that plot line was so fluffin stupid, so yay alive Ben)
(And Diego and Luther meet Lila and Sloane respectively cuz they are also part of the marigold brood so they still do exist at the same time, so yay happy couples)
It is somewhat simple, but I think that works as well, especially for a character like Five. He spends so much time looking at all the different equations, trying to find some complex solution to everything, trying permutation after permutation (as evidenced by our and the diner Five's), when it was right in front of him. Idk, I just think it would be nice if he just decided to stay with his siblings instead of running off.
Sure it may not be completely perfect, maybe Ben still does die, or Klaus can’t meet Dave again, or characters still find themselves prey to their arrogance but I don’t think it needs to be, because real life isn’t perfect. But the bonds we make and the love we share makes it so, a major theme the Umbrella Academy isn't unfamiliar with.
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And it just makes me so deeply sad that this isn’t the ending we got. That this isn’t the ending the characters got.
They deserve so much better than Blackman gave them, and it’s a disgrace that he didn’t.
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ellavatorz · 2 years ago
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Kiss me Plenty || c.b. x reader
summary: you play the “I can’t stop kissing you,” prank on colby.
tags/cw: implied smut, kisses (lots of ‘em), tooth-rotting sweet fluff, established relationship, youtuber(s) relationship.
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a/n: there isn’t much for me to say except that I have a very strong yearn for colby to be kissed 24/7. if that man isn’t being kissed at every second of the day like he deserves, then the world is a cruel joke of a place.
and a huge thank you to everyone who enjoyed my last work, you guys are so sweet T.T happy holidays!
- - -
You have the camera set up first thing in the morning. It’s hidden out of visible-sight and is focused on Colby’s usual spot; his desk, where he normally films intros to videos amongst other tasks in respect to his shared channel with Sam.
The plot of your video to be filmed today is explained to your audience. All while a grin is spread on your lips. “Today’s goal is to annoy the shit out of Colby by kissing the hell out of him. I don’t know how he’ll react considering he’s hyper-affectionate as it is… but its also normally something he does rather than me initiating it. So maybe he’ll suspect something right off the bat? Who knows!”
By the time Colby has migrated from your shared bed to his desk, you’re just outside the door, anxiously prepared for whatever may come of the situation. Without much of an extravagant entrance, you move toward where he is and stand behind him. His eyes are glued to the screen and you pretend to seem intrigued by whatever it is he’s looking at.
A yawn escapes his mouth as he reaches an arm behind himself, subconsciously searching for any part of you to grasp onto and reel in. “Good morning, baby.” He rasps, last night’s rest still grappling at his body.
“Morning,” you reply, allowing him to pull you closer. You take this as an advantage to wrap your arms around his shoulders from where you now stand beside him. “What are you working on today?”
Colby’s gaze is still caught on the screen when his own arm is snaked around your waist. His eyes flicker from one end to another, clearly focused on whatever he’s reading. “Just emails right now. I have a bit of review and editing tasks to get done on the apparel website too..”
“Ah, I see.” You sigh. Your eyes flash a mischievous glint toward the camera before you begin leaning into his space to plant a soft peck to his cheek. “Do you need anything? Water? Snacks?”
Still enraptured by work, he acknowledges your question half-heartedly. “No, love. Thank you though.”
You feign a frown at his response and begin swaying his chair left to right when the hold on your waist is replaced by the computer’s mouse. He scrolls through several pages, reading what he can manage to as you continue rocking his chair.
“What time do you think you’ll be done?” You question innocently, though you both are aware that his work is capable of enveloping the entirety of his day. He shrugs, too focused to respond. You take this as an opportunity to leave a kiss on the crown of his head, moving behind his chair to loosely circle your arms around his neck. “I think I’m gonna finish my Christmas shopping while you’re still here.”
He hums and it’s evident that he isn’t regarding your presence to the full extent that it’s normally at. You huff and lean over his shoulder to litter butterfly-light kisses along the side of his neck. He unconsciously cranes his neck, providing you with more access to the skin.
“Shouldn’t you come and eat breakfast first? You haven’t eaten anything.” You ponder aloud, and this time, he shakes his head.
“I’m fine, babe.“ he mutters, eyes squinting in the analysis of his emails. Your tongue comes out to swipe at your lips, wetting them before leaning further into his space and kissing him straight on the mouth. At this, he cocks his head to the side, granting you access for more.
You continue to press into him, feeling accomplished when you realize that now he’s fully focused on you. The kiss is languid and feels good enough to praise, but before you can fully enjoy it, Colby is pulling away with a pitiful smile. You don’t even have to question him because he’s apologizing in an instant.
“I’m sorry, petal. I really have to get these things done. I promise as soon as I get this out of the way, I’m all yours.” He says and you can’t help but feel a tug at your heart. God, he really is the cutest. With the way his eyes glimmer at you, you’re confident with the idea that this man could un-alive your childhood pet and get away with it by just looking at you with those damned ocean eyes.
“Just a minute more?” shaking off the thought of ending the video early out of awe for your boyfriend, you continue your antics. You plead instead, batting your lashes tauntingly while returning to his side.
He blinks owlishly at you and ultimately accepts, pulling you into his lap by the hips and allowing you to straddle him comfortably. You grin, wasting no time and diving straight in for a passionate kiss. His hands snake around you to land on your ass, giving a gentle squeeze to which you groan into his lips for.
For a second, you’re convinced that this moment would last for an eternity with the pace that he’s taking. Theres not a doubt that he’d absolutely waste an entire day just to kiss you, and in this case you want this to be one of those days. His kiss is smooth, gentle, yet fierce and meaningful. Your hands move on their own accord; one pressing into the broad of his chest and the other entangling into his hair.
There’s a moan serenading your ears after a few rough tugs to the strands on his head. However, before you know it, he’s giving you one last playful tug to your lip and placing a good space between the two of you. While you’re grateful for this moment to breathe, you also fall clueless as to why the hell he stopped.. until, of course, you remember that you’re filming a video, and he’s working. Hello!
“Do you know how distracting you can be?” Colby chuckles, and you take a few seconds to take in his appearance; hair tussled, eyes dark and dilated, lips swollen with a few teeth indentations caused due to your own accord. You almost want to spend the rest of the video admiring your work, but conclude that the show must go on.
“What ever do you mean, coleslaw?” You quip, pushing against his hands from where they’ve been placed on your shoulders to distance you from him.
He immediately motions for you to get off of him, his hands already shoving at your chest. “Coleslaw? You’re done. Get off of me.”
You laugh and reluctantly remove yourself from his lap only to make an attempt at lifting him up with you. As if knowing exactly what you’re about to do, he drops his weight into his chair. You grunt, tugging on his arms with all your might. He doesn’t budge.
“Baby,” you whine, and add a childish stomp for emphasis. “Can’t you just take today off to spend time with me? Please?”
He falls limp at your words, tossing his head back against the chair’s headrest and huffs in thought. “We already hung out yesterday. The entire day! What do you want to do anyway?”
Pouting, you take advantage of his loose posture to throne his lap once more. Again, circling his neck with your arms and trying to pull him impossibly closer. Though, he does his best to keep a stoic expression and an emotional stiffness to prevent persuasion.
“I miss you,” the words seemingly fall on deaf ears as he remains unfazed, eyes wandering around the room; in other words, anywhere but you. “..just wanted to kiss you today.. but i guess you don’t want my kisses. guess I’ll just find someone else who does—“
His sigh mimics one of defeat. His hold on your tightens in protectiveness, as if afraid you may be taken from him. You begin to feel that bubble of mischief rising to your cheeks, tugging your lips into a smile. Yes! It’s working!
“One more kiss, and i seriously have to get back to work, okay?” He gambles, and suddenly your smile is fading into a frown. He directs his stare back to you, a small quirk at the corner of his mouth. “What, isn’t that what you want? Take it or leave it, baby.”
You bare your teeth in grimace, eyes twinkling with competitiveness before you dive in. Planting your lips on his, you nip and lap at the opening he gives you. Without much hesitance, he’s reciprocating in eagerness. Your tongues dance in the heat of the moment, teeth clashing with force. It’s clear how much you two want each other. And it’s even more evident just how far you’re willing to go for it.
“God, what’s gotten into you?” He manages to slur through the daze you’ve entrapped him in. The intimacy in the kiss exceeds even deeper when you apply pressure against his crotch, gaining a desperate reaction in return. He whimpers against your lips, bringing you impossibly closer to his form as he ruts against you.
“just.. really.. want.. you.” Your voice tapers off into a moan with each breath you take in between. And that’s when you realize. Oh shit. he’s hard.
A probing feeling at your clothed entrance is all it takes for you to pull back and freeze, hands instantly darting for the camera from where it was hidden just a few minutes ago. You focus the rest of the footage toward you, regarding your boyfriend’s lustful daze as a sign to come clean. Placing one hand on his cheek while the other holds the camera, you give a breathy and worried giggle.
“Are you—“ you start, motioning toward the evident tent in his sweats. His eyes waver from your face for a mere second to assess the situation before returning to you. “Colby?”
“Is this is a prank?” He mumbles, cocking his head toward the camera in your hand. You nod, curtaining your smile by placing a palm over your mouth. “Oh,”
“Colby, It’s a prank. I didn’t expect it to go this far!” You admit, and suddenly the giddiness you had been shielding from escaping you throughout the video is released. You laugh in embarrassment. “Oh my gosh. Guys, if you saw anything…. No you didn’t. Haha! But seriously, my poor baby suffered today so if you enjoyed the video, be sure to like and subscribe. Until next time, bye!”
The moment the video comes to an end, Colby is cursing you up and down for the scheme you had hidden from him. However, his scolding shortly concludes with a soft, and admittedly disappointing, “—had me all excited..”
“Oh my poor baby,” you coo, both of you now free from an audience’s presence via camera. Holding his face in your hands, you apply pressure to his cheeks, forcing his lips to pucker when you go in for a gentle kiss. “‘M sorry. The fans really wanted to see what you’d do.”
“Well now they know, so can we please not do that again. you’re very irresistible and convincing you know that?”
You press a gentle peck to his cheek and huff. “Yeah I’ve heard it a few times from my boyfriend.”
“Wow. I feel bad for your boyfriend.” Colby jokes playfully.
“Do you? Hm. Guess I should be a little nicer to him.”
“Maybe.” He pouts his lips toward you, proceeding to lift you from where the two of you sit on his office chair. Your legs wrap around his middle as he travels toward your shared bed. “I think your boyfriend deserves it.”
“I think so too,” you smile. Continuing from where you had left off, you both spend the rest of the morning doing exactly as you begged for; spending the day together. And making out, of course. And maybe a little more than that.
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