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beastofburdenxo · 6 months ago

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Songbird

Tommy becomes infatuated with an exact opposite of himself. Maybe there is something to this redemption thing after all.

tags: Violence, guns, mention of blood, religious themes, some fluff.

@everandforeveryours @your-nanas-house @novashelby @lau219

Tommy Shelby never was one for religion, or God, any deity for that matter. But, seeing you that uneventful day did make him believe there were good things in the world. He never knew your name. He just knew your heavenly voice. You loved to sing, and any chance you had that is what you did. He was walking by your father’s store the first time he heard you. The window was open that warm day while you were stocking shelves. The beautiful sound hit his ears, immediately drawing his attention. Tommy stood flat against the building so you wouldn’t know he was eavesdropping. He closed his eyes with a smile as the sweet melody washed over him. Tommy knew then that you were his songbird.

He watched you from afar to not scare you. Tommy learned that you were sweet and timid. You worked at your father’s store and was a regular church goer. He never bothered you. His reputation was well known, and he knew that you could do- and should deserve- better. His eye was always on you. Not in a bad way of course. Just watch to make sure you are okay. Burmingham was a rough place to be. Much too rough for the likes of you, but you survived just fine. Born and raised there to his surprise. The closest Tommy ever got to you was when he snuck into the church to hear you sing with the choir. He was hunched over in the back of course, not to draw attention.

His eyes were only on you, his songbird. He ignored everyone else including Jesus. Tommy was there just for you. You were proof that good things happen and exist. A beacon of light in this dirty dreary town. He snuck out before church let out to not draw attention to himself. The feared devil of Small Heath in a church service is bad for business. One night you had choir practice run a little late, and Tommy was outside waiting for you to come out. Tommy always kept his distance but was always there just in case. There were lots of bad men in this town, Tommy would know. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself if some evil man hurt you. The most innocent thing in his life.

Finally, you exited the church and headed home, Tommy silently not far behind. You turned the corner as usual, and Tommy heard you cry out. He pulled out his gun from his coat and headed in your direction. Two men had grabbed you to do God knows what. They were smiling and cackling, happy with what they had caught. You tried to get away, but that just made them laugh more. Tears filled your eyes as two gunshots rang in the air. Immediately their hands were off you. You touched your face after something wet splashed onto it. Blood. Not your blood. Before you passed out, you saw bright blue eyes glowing at you in the moonlight.

Tommy felt horrible. Not about the men. About scaring you so bad you fainted. And the blood that got on you. You were so close to the men when he shot them in the head that it couldn’t be helped. His poor songbird collapsed in fear. Tommy spit on the men before gently scooping you up in his arms. He must get you away from here before you wake up. You can’t see the crime scene he just made. The Garrison was just up the street, so he figured he would take you there and clean you up. You began to stir a few minutes into the trip. “Relax, love, I won’t drop you. Almost there.” You didn’t know what “where” was, but the voice was deep and relaxing, so you didn’t fight. Tommy kicked open The Garrison’s door and brought you inside. He set you gently on the bar and went to turn the lights on. “It’s alright love. It's over. Let me clean you up, yeah?” Tommy softly touched your face with a wet rag to get the blood off. “I’m sorry about the blood. You were standing awfully close to them. They won’t bother you or any other woman again I promise.”

Any other time you would be afraid. You are in a bar for the first time ever alone with a strange man who may or may not have just hurt someone. But oddly enough you weren’t. He carried you to safety and cleaned you up. He certainly didn’t have to. “What did you do to those men earlier?” your voice comes out barely a whisper. “Don’t worry about it yeah? It's done and over with. You are safe now.” Out of the corner of your eye you see a gun sitting on the bar. You are not silly. You know what he did. "Murder is a mortal sin Mr.Shelby." Tommy, very surprised you knew who he was replied with raised eyebrows, "What those men would've done to you would have been worse than murder sweetheart. Where was your god back there huh?"

You gave Tommy a smile that almost stopped his heart. "That's an easy one, Mr. Shelby. He was in the alley with us and He compelled you to save me." Tommy chuckled. "God used the devil of Small Heath, eh? I'm surprised he knows who I am." You sit up on the bar. "He knows everyone. He can work through anyone. I'll be praying for you Mr. Shelby. I see a goodness in you." Tommy helped you to your feet. "Call me Tommy, love. Well, if what you say is true, can we take you home?" You took Tommy's arm and he walked you home. It was a comfortable silence. Tommy wanted to take your hand, but decided that you have been through enough this evening. He strangely liked how full of faith you were. How you could have seen any possible good in him was beyond him. He always thought he was beyond redemption.

You two finally made it to her door. Part of Tommy didn't want to let her go, but the other half knew it was for the best. "Well Tommy, this is me." you timidly state. "Will you tell your father what happened tonight?" Tommy asks, not wanting her father to pay him a visit. Even though he was the good guy for once. "No, probably not. I don't want him to worry more than he already does. But, thank you Tommy. For everything." With a small smile he takes your hand and softly kisses it. "Don't thank me love, thank your god yeah?" His songbird turns a pretty shade of pink at the affection. "I expect to see you this Sunday, Tommy. Regardless if you're hiding in the back or not."

Tommy's eyes got big. "You knew I was there?" HIs songbird lets out a pretty chuckle almost as harmonic as her singing. "I know every face at the church Tommy. You stuck out like a sore thumb to me." Now it was Tommy's turn to get shy as he moves from one foot to the other. "Well i'll try I guess, love. But, no promises. I'll be there for you if I do go. I'm still not on speaking terms with your god." She goes to open the door. "That's alright, Tommy. He'll speak to you when he's ready. You'll be in my prayers tonight." Sunday comes around, and Tommy finds himself outside the church. Something about songbird noticing him last time he was here, made him uneasy. What was he doing? Is this God supposedly talking to him now? Tommy just felt compelled to see her again. With her knowing that is. His watches have still been going on, gun staying in the holster.

With a sigh, Tommy sneaks in the church. In his usual back corner. His songbird in the front of the choir singing her heart out. He felt his eyes water, but didn't let the tears fall. What the hell is this? Tommy felt eyes on him, and before he could run, he noticed it was just his songbird. She smiled at him and continued to sing. Maybe she will be his saving grace after all. Maybe there is something to this redemption thing.

#cillian murphy #tommy shelby #peaky blinders #tommy shelby imagine #tommy shelby fanfiction #tommy shelby x reader

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whump-tr0pes · 1 year ago

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Honor Bound 6 - 22

This is a series. Start here, continued from here.

This is a sequel to Honor Bound, Honor Bound 2, Honor Bound 3, Honor Bound 4, Honor Bound 5, and the prequel Vera.

Masterlist

AO3

Contents: awkward post-breakup situations, awkward relationship dynamics in general, past implied noncon, past death of a family member, messy handling of grief, navigation of breakups in poly relationships, nonexplicit discussion of sex, past attempted murder

I have not updated this story in over a year. Thank you so much to everyone who has stuck with it

The leaves crunched on the path under Sam’s feet as they made their way towards the center of town. They tried to focus on the trees that flanked them on either side, their crowns shivering in the slight breeze. They tried to keep their attention on how the crisp air felt on their cheeks, rustling through their hair, pressing against their jacket. They tilted their head back and drew in a deep breath, doing their best not to think.

They tried hard not to think about Isaac and Gavin, who had both looked at Sam – Gavin with uncertainty, and Isaac with naked anger – as they were leaving. They tried not to think about Gray, who had dark circles under their eyes and exhaustion in every line of their face as they tried to hold the shattered fragments of the family together.

And they tried not to think about the cell phone in their back pocket, which Gray had given them for the walk into town.

Sam hadn’t wanted to let themself hope for a response when they’d sent the message earlier today:

Hey, it’s Sam. Did Edrissa still want to chat?

They had tried to tell themself not to expect a response, at least, not for a couple days – not until she could come up with some kind of excuse for why she couldn’t see them. It had been her to reach out first, but Sam had felt a nagging anxiety, a nauseous thrum in their stomach telling them that she had changed her mind. Two days had passed since Vera first reached out, telling Gray that Edrissa wanted to talk to Sam, and they hadn’t received an answer until this afternoon, so that really hadn’t seemed impossible.

Then there was the possibility that Sam had considered, even as the thought ached in their heart: Maybe Edrissa had left Laporte entirely, and Tori and Vera just hadn’t told the others yet.

Sam pulled the phone out of their pocket and opened the messages. They chewed the inside of their cheek as they stared at her response, the one they’d gotten only twenty minutes earlier and had all but jumped off the couch to answer:

It’s Edrissa. Yes, please. Meet me at the general store? They have pies, we could share one if you want.

Sure, sounds good. Meet you there in 20?

Yes, please.

Their foot caught on an uneven patch of ground and they stumbled forward. The phone nearly dropped from their hand. Tight laughter swelled in their chest, pushing at the inside of their ribs, as they glanced around. There wasn’t a soul around, just trees and sunlight and the gentle song of birds.

Sam’s throat tightened as they put the phone back in their pocket. They quickened their step and pushed out a shaky breath between their lips.

Why do we have to live so far away from the town center?

The fifteen-minute walk had never felt so long.

Still, a fifteen-minute walk to a town where people knew and might someday care about them was far better than a fifteen-minute drive to Burmingham, where they hardly knew anyone, and rarely even drove into town anyway. The trees thinned, and before them they could see almost the entirety of Laporte – all one block of it. General store, post office that doubled as a community gathering space, laundry, machinery and repair. Although, everyone who lived there understood that they all had to do more than just what the front of their store advertised, or what they had done for a living while trapped in the hell of the syndicate world. Here, everyone worked together to keep this little town of barely two hundred people running. And it all ran without the heavy-handed authority of someone like Schiester.

Sam pushed out a steadying breath and let their feet pull them towards the general store. They tried to ignore the fluttering in their stomach, even now, even after everything that had happened.

She might not even be there. She might still bail on me. Resentment prickled, and they hated the feeling. She was so ready to bail on me before.

If the walk into town felt like it took ages, the final few yards could have taken the blink of an eye. They swallowed the lump in their throat as they stood in front of the slightly warped wooden door, studying the fresh coat of forest green paint. Just go in. Come on, coward, just go inside. Another deep breath.

They pushed the door open. A bell tinkled overhead, and the comforting scent of grain and dried fruit washed over them. A woman stood behind the counter, giving Sam a friendly smile and a wave before her hand moved to her heavily pregnant belly. Sam only had a moment to take in the rows of canned and dried goods on the rows of shelves before they noticed Edrissa in the corner.

Their heart swelled with a painful throb. She was sitting at the only table in the store, next to a small display of pies that made Sam’s mouth water. Her hair was pulled back, a few short strands falling forward to frame her face. Her eyes were red-rimmed and puffy. Her hands were folded on the table in front of her, the knuckles white. Her shoulders were tense and pulled forward, and Sam felt their own shoulders rising in sympathy. She glanced up, meeting Sam’s eyes and giving them a hesitant smile.

Sam’s resentment melted, just a little. They shuffled forward and all but fell into the seat in front of her.

“Hey,” they murmured.

“Hey,” Edrissa said. A long silence drew out between them. Edrissa’s eyes flicked down and she stared at the table.

Sam chewed their lip. “So… I heard they had, uh, pie here.”

Edrissa shot up from her seat so quickly it startled Sam. “Yes. Um. Let me…” She stumbled towards the counter, where the shopkeeper gave her a warm smile. Edrissa murmured something to her, and both women made their way back to the pie display.

“This is Meredith,” Edrissa said absentmindedly. “Meredith, this is Sam, this is who I was, um…” She flushed crimson and stared at the floor.

“It’s nice to meet you, Sam,” Meredith said with a nod and a smile. “Are you interested in one of the pies?”

Sam’s eyebrows pulled together. “Um… sure, yes please,” they said as they glanced at the display. “Edrissa, want to, um… have some cherry pie?”

Edrissa’s lips quirked in a smile, her gaze still glued to the floor. “Sounds good,” she breathed.

Meredith nodded as she opened the display and took out one of the pies with a complicated-looking lattice crust. “Lovely. One of my favorites. My sister-in-law makes these, I swear she must put some magic in ‘em. If you’re alright eating right out of the tin, I’ll just fetch some forks.” She set the pie on the table in front of Sam.

“Yeah, sounds… sounds good,” Sam said, eyes still on Edrissa.

“Thank you Meredith,” Edrissa said as she took her seat in front of Sam. Her cheeks were finally returning to their normal shade.

Meredith returned with two forks. “Enjoy. Let me know if you need me to wrap up some leftovers… but if you kids finish the thing, just leave the tin!” She grinned down at both of them.

“Thanks Meredith,” Edrissa said, smiling up at the woman. “You’re the best.”

“You’re the delight, darlin’. And I’m hoping to get your linen in tomorrow. Sorry for the delays, you know how it’s been with… well. You know. The situation and all.” Meredith sighed and motioned her head in the general direction of Crayton.

“Mm hm.” Edrissa nodded. She glanced at Sam, then back up at Meredith.

Meredith snorted. “Listen to me. I could chat with you all day, you’re such a dear. Well, you just come get me when you need something. I’ll be, ah, in the back. Can’t hear much back there.” She gave Edrissa a conspiratorial wink that Sam couldn’t have missed. She turned and waddled away, chuckling under her breath.

When Edrissa raised her to Sam again, her lips were twisted in a look of undeniable guilt.

Sam picked up the fork and carefully excavated a bite from the very center of the pie. “So,” they said conversationally. “Who does she think I am?” They raised the bite to their lips. Flavor exploded on their tongue, tart and sweet and tasting of summer. Their eyes went wide and they quickly went for a second bite. “Why didn’t we move here sooner?” they muttered.

“Uh…” Edrissa’s voice wavered. “She thinks you’re someone I like. A lot.” She gathered a small bite of pie on her fork and raised it to her lips.

Sam’s mouth twisted. “So… she thinks this is a date.”

Edrissa froze. “Um… maybe. And it’s… it’s not…?”

A feeling Sam didn’t recognize clutched his chest. They put down the fork and leaned back, crossing their arms. “No,” they croaked. “It’s not.”

Edrissa’s face fell.

“Does that lady know about Zachariah?” Sam said, their voice gaining strength.

Edrissa stared at the table as she set down her own fork. “N-no,” she whispered. “Um, how… h-how is he?”

You could ask him that yourself, if you still cared.

Sam swallowed down the uncharitable thought.

“He’s good,” they said brusquely. Then, “He’s… okay. He’s relieved Gavin’s safe, and Schiester’s dead. It’s been… rough on him, these past few weeks.”

Edrissa tilted her head, plaintively looking up at Sam beneath her lashes. “It could have been better,” she murmured, almost too quietly to hear. “If he’d… if he’d come with me, he could have—”

“Stop,” Sam said, their left hand clenching around their right. “Please. Stop. I didn’t come here to have this argument with you again. And for god’s sake, it doesn’t even… matter anymore. Schiester’s dead. The threat is dead. And as far as I can see, the only person still threatening people in my family is you.”

The words were out before Sam could stop them. They regretted them as soon as they passed their lips. Edrissa recoiled as if Sam had raised their hand to slap her.

Sam bowed their head. “I’m sorry,” they said, jaw tight. “That’s… not what I meant to say.” When they raised their head again, Edrissa looked ready to collapse. She was cringing back in her chair, eyes swimming with tears, hugging herself like she was freezing. Her lower lip trembled as she looked at Sam. Helplessly, she shrugged her shoulders and let them fall again.

“I’m sorry,” she whimpered. “I… I thought I was doing the right thing.”

By dumping me? Or calling me a child? Or killing Gavin after everything he’s done for us? For you?

Again, Sam bit back the thoughts. They burned on their tongue, coated their throat. The unspoken words left them feeling sick with injustice and hurt. They opened their mouth to speak.

Edrissa beat them to it. “You don’t know what it was like,” she breathed. “With… with him. With Sir. And… I understand that… you think people change—”

“They do change—”

“—it was two years. W-with Sir. With someone like Gavin Stormbeck, or his father. Well…” Edrissa gave a shaky shrug. “Closer to his father, sounds like. So you don’t understand… what it’s like to have to… live with someone like that. To live with someone just like the person who killed your brother in front of your face.”

Sam’s hackles raised. “I’m a goddamn orphan because of the syndicates—”

Edrissa slapped her hands on the table. “So is half the fucking world, Sam,” she snarled. “You don’t remember your parents. I watched my brother die in front of me as th-they dragged m-me away to…” Edrissa’s breath hitched, and her hands curled into fists on the table. “I’m not… no. I’m not doing this. I’m not doing this with you, I’m not…” She pushed out a gusty breath. “This isn’t what I wanted to do.”

“Then what is?” Sam said through their teeth, ready to stand up and walk out that second.

Edrissa tore her hands through her hair, pulling more strands out of the clip that held it back. She leaned her elbows on the table, holding her head, and screwed up her face. “I wanted…” Her voice broke. She rocked her whole body forward and back, banging her elbows lightly on the table. “This isn’t how I wanted this to go,” she said softly.

Sam’s mouth twisted as they looked at her. They didn’t want to, but… something in their heart softened, even as they bristled from her barb about their parents. They reached out their left hand and placed it on the table, palm up. An invitation, not a demand. Nothing had ever been a demand, with them.

Her lips quivered as she glanced at their hand, and back at them. Her hand shook as she placed it gently into theirs. They squeezed. She squeezed back. Then they let go and tucked their hand back in her lap. The hope that had glimmered briefly in her eyes faded again.

“So,” Sam said as they took up their fork again and scooped up another bite of pie. “What did you want to talk about?”

Edrissa watched them as they took the bite and chewed slowly, savoring the pop of cherries, the sweetness of the sugar. After they swallowed, they took another bite. Edrissa still hadn’t eaten anything.

Finally, she said, “I’m glad Zachariah is doing okay.” She ducked her head and ate the bite that had been sitting on her fork. “Mmm. Good pie. So are you still… um…” She cleared her throat. “Do you…?”

“Are we still… together?” Sam said, trying for casualness. They speared another bite.

“…yes,” Edrissa said. She was holding perfectly still, like a frightened deer that had somehow managed to find its way into a general store.

Sam pushed out a slow breath. “Yeah,” they said, and took another bite. “Yeah, we’re still… hanging out, and… together.”

“Are you… sleeping together?” Edrissa whispered.

Sam raised his gaze to hers. She was looking at them pleadingly, but Sam felt like pleading with her, too. Please, they thought. You don’t actually want to know. You know it won’t help. Still, she held their gaze, her empty fork held in trembling fingers.

“Yeah,” they said, finally. “Yeah, we are.”

She let out a breath, as if Sam had confirmed something she had long suspected and feared. She nodded solemnly. “I thought so,” she murmured.

There was nothing Sam could say. Nothing at all could make this better.

Edrissa blinked back tears and nodded again. “Okay,” she said, voice twisted and choked.

Guilt overwhelmed Sam. They couldn’t stop the words from coming out of their mouth: “You broke up with me,” they said flatly.

“Yeah, I know,” Edrissa said, swiping at her eyes. “I know that. I just…” She laughed, although it sounded suspiciously like a sob. “I just… really messed up all around.”

“I mean, Gavin forgives you,” Sam said with a tight smile, trying for levity. The words fell flat.

“Well, Gavin’s an idiot,” Edrissa grumbled. She aggressively scooped up another bite of pie.

“Yeah,” Sam said with a real laugh. “A bit, yeah.” They ate another bite. Then another. The pie was so good, and about a third of it was gone. Edrissa was eating with a bit more gusto now, too.

The bell tinkled overhead as another customer entered the store. Meredith came to the counter from the back room, and the two of them struck up a conversation. From across the store, it sounded like they were talking about pigs. Sam hadn’t seen any pigs around town, but perhaps there was a farm further away from the town center? Or maybe these were pigs from another town altogether. Either way, Sam was happy to let their mind wander to something other than the tightness in Edrissa’s shoulders, and the pain in her eyes. After a while, the customer purchased a canvas sack of flour and ten cans of crushed tomatoes with peeling labels. Flour from up north, then, and tomatoes stolen from syndicate supply lines. Then the customer left, with only a glance at Sam and Edrissa in the corner.

After a long silence, Edrissa spoke again. “So… do you think we… could ever be… you know…?”

Sam’s eyes fell closed. They rubbed the bridge of their nose and looked at Edrissa again. “Together? Or… friends?”

Hurt flashed in Edrissa’s eyes. “Friends. I know you’d never want to be… with me. Again. After what I did.”

Sam’s lips pursed. “You really don’t get the idea of forgiveness, do you?” They lowered their voice to soften the blow of their words.

Edrissa leaned back. “I tried to kill Gavin,” she said, lip curling. “That’s not something you forgive. And that’s not even the first time I—” Her eyes widened, and her mouth snapped shut.

A chill shivered down Sam’s back. “That’s not… wait… how many times have you…? Edrissa, what?”

“No,” Edrissa said, shaking, hands braced on the table. “No, I’m not… I need to go. I have to—” She shoved herself to her feet.

“Edrissa, stop,” Sam snapped. Edrissa froze where she stood. “For shit’s sake, stop. Just stop. Will you… stop deciding how I feel about shit that you did for two seconds?”

Edrissa’s ice blue eyes were locked on Sam, wide and terrified, but she stayed. For a few more seconds, at least. Sam wet their lips. “Just wait, okay? Let’s just talk. You wanted to talk, right? I already know you tried to kill Gavin. That’s not a secret. And you’re already… forgiven… for that, right?” The word came out strained, but it still came out. “So let’s just talk. Please?”

Edrissa thudded back into her seat like a sack of potatoes. She nodded, shaking.

“Okay.” Sam let out a breath, which turned into a chuckle. They began to giggle uncontrollably, all the tension leaving their body in a gale of laughter as Edrissa watched, a look of confusion only fueling Sam’s hysterics. “Now,” Sam said, clutching their stomach and heaving for air. “How m-many goddamn times have you tried to kill Gavin?”

Continued here

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#honor bound 6 #sorry for taking so long #it was a season of rest #breakups #relationship dynamics #implied past noncon #implied past death #grief #polyamory #discussion of sex #past attempted murder #Sam/Edrissa

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