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[earthry]

First of all, I wanted to say how much I love your writing! Every time I see that you posted something its easily one of the highlights of my day!

If I may, could I maybe ask how would the Papas handle someone who suffers from chronic pain, especially back pain? If you dont want to answer thats ofc fine too!! Thank you :)

Thank you so much!! I'm very happy to hear I can brighten someone's day with my work <3

Here you go, please enjoy!

sfw, hurt/comfort, fluff, disclaimer: writing with my own experience with chronic pain, other's experiences may be different.

Primo

This old man knows exactly how it feels to have aches and pains-- though your afflictions are not the same, he does understand. The two of you help each other on your bad days, it's very sweet. If it's a rough day for you, he will help you with anything you have trouble with using your mobility. If your back pain makes it hard to be up, he'll bring everything to you. Vice versa when he's having a bad day, you'll be the one to assist him (and if it's so bad that he can't tend to the garden that day, you'll go do it for him for his peace of mind).

If you're both having a bad day? It's a day in bed and you take your medication together with fancy little wine glasses (filled with water only-- don't mix meds with alcohol). He'll break out your matching heating pads and put your favorite show on the TV in your bedroom. Primo calls one of his brothers to make sure the garden is tended to for the day.

If you have wrist pain and have trouble opening things, well probably don't ask Primo because peepaw's strength ain't too much better. Both of you go begging to Secondo to open your jars and if it's a cheat day and you're using canned pasta sauce (which Primo only accepts when making it from scratch is too much for the two of you), you'll go to one of the ghouls to open it instead least Secondo bites your heads off.

TLDR your entire relationship is built on love and understanding and helping each other when the occasion arises. You never judge each other for what you can do one day and can't do the next. Support, encouragement, and communication are very important to the two of you.

Secondo

Secondo is a menace with his credit card. He will buy you everything and anything that could and can help your chronic pain. He's not the best at emotional comfort but he tries to support you and care for you in the ways he knows how to. And that includes buying you countless muscle rubs, heating pads and cushions, bath soaks and soaps, massage guns, braces and wraps, so many rolls of athletic tape, and anything else that may help.

Of course it's way more than you need but he will insist that he is stocking you up just in case you need it someday. You almost feel like one of those coupon moms that buy things in bulk.

Very good with his hands and an expert at kneading the tension from your body. Even if your chronic pain doesn't flair every day, he'll make it a routine to give you a massage every night before bed.

Speaking of routines, he'll run you a hot bath every night (unless you're not feeling like it) and add epsom salt plus the essential oils he got from Primo that are supposed to help your muscles relax. He'll make sure you get a good soak in and slowly wash your hair for you, lathering expensive shampoo in your hair and massaging your scalp.

Once you're all clean and ready for bed, he'll give you your massage while you doze in bed. If you have a cream that helps relieve muscle pain or something similar, he'll often use that while he rubs your back or anywhere needed. You're often fast asleep by the time he's done and he'll give you a good night forehead kiss before sliding into bed to join you.

Terzo

My favorite HC for Terzo is that his love language is acts of service. Physically showing you that he loves you, cares about you. It ties into the fact that these are all things he wishes someone would love him enough to do too (and you do).

He knows cooking is strenuous for you on bad pain days; that's why he's always willing to drop everything to make you a decent meal. He'll bring it to you no matter where you are, and even on days that you might be able to cook he'll want to do it for you anyways. He pulls out his most beloved recipes for you and makes your favorites.

Sometimes you'll sit in the kitchen with a heated blanket and some pillows that Terzo has brought in to help you be comfier, just to keep him company. As long as your pain is bearable enough to move to the kitchen, you try to be there just as much as he does for you. You can see from the expression on his face the first time you drag your achey body from your room to the kitchen that he's starstruck. It means a lot to him when you take the time to be there with him. Of course, he fusses over you to make sure you're not in pain and not pushing yourself by moving all the way there. He will smother you in love and care.

He may be very talented with his fingers (wink wink) but this man has no idea how to give a good massage; in fact he's often too afraid that he will hurt you by pushing or pressing on you too hard. But he does his best! He watches some youtube tutorials and looks up how-to's online. Be patient with him and he will slowly become an expert at it. He's very proud of himself the first time you absolutely melt under his hands, the pain easing just a little. Of course it won't fix everything but in the moment it feels so nice.

Copia

He's very worried at first; he doesn't know about the chronic pain and at the beginning he's worried that something is very very wrong and tries to urge you to see a doctor (or two or three because your man is a worryrat).

You soothe him and reassure him that nothing serious is wrong-- whatever issue you have that is causing your chronic pain is either already taken care of or being addressed. There's nothing you can do about it right now.

Does anything he can to help alleviate your pain. Helps massage your back or wrist or where ever you may need it. He'll buy heating pads for you and those cute little stuffed animals that have a pouch for a heating pack (or that you microwave to heat up).

Gets sad sometimes especially when he's done everything he can and the only thing he can't do is directly take the pain way (by the unholy lord does he wish he could though).

Sometimes you catch him looking distraught when you're laying in bed or having trouble with something and you call him over to reassure him that you're okay. Sure you're hurting, but you don't want your loved ones around you to hurt too, not when they don't need to.

He loves you so much, does anything he can to help. Sometimes you're afraid of asking for too much or that he'll get tired of taking care of you but he never does and he will remind you every day that he loves you and loves taking care of you because he wants you happy and safe. There is no such thing as asking for too much for him.

[athulyaaindia]

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[javierpinme]

Very self indulgent thought but I’m thinking about Frankie Morales and a stubborn reader where they’ve been dating a short amount of time. Short enough that you still have your walls up and are hesitant about letting someone in because you feel too much.

And then you get sick. You’re supposed to have plans with him, but can’t even get out of bed so you cancel. You don’t tell him that you’re sick because you don’t want him to feel obligated to come over and go back to sleep.

Of course he heard from your mutual friends that you are actually sick and goes shopping to buy you all the essentials. Chicken noodle soup, epsom salt, and one of those bulk boxes of kleenex so you don’t run out. 

Then he grabs the humidifier that he uses for his daughter and goes to your place. He knows where the spare key is and walks in. You live with roommates so you’re not alarmed when you hear movement in the kitchen and up the carpeted stairs.

Not until you see Frankie in the doorway of your bedroom and you panic over the visible used tissues and attempt to clean up so you don’t look as gross as you feel.

“Baby, why didn’t you tell me you were sick? I would have come over sooner.”

He cleans up despite your protests that he doesn’t need to do that and that you don’t want him to get sick so you can do it yourself. You don’t want him to feel like he needs to take care of you so early on, but you bite that one back before it reaches the air.

He walks out to the bathroom to fill up your tub with the epsom salt he bought and in your half-sleep haze you barely recognize the sound of the water rushing until he comes back in to direct you to the bath. 

You protest again because you’re too tired to do your routine when stepping out of the bath, but too tired to fight him when he helps you into the tub. It’s so warm and you smell a faint eucalyptus permeating in the air so you close your eyes from how good it feels when he sprays the nozzle on your head.

You open them up again when you hear the tell-tale sound of your shampoo bottle being opened and you can’t tell if the tears building in your eyes is from the impromptu scalp massage he gives as he washes your hair or how sweet your Frankie is being.

And once you step out of the bath he walks you back to your bedroom but you’re confused he tells you to get on top of the blankets and not cuddle under the warmth. He walks back from the bathroom with your moisturizer and the oil you always use in his hands.

You’re about to tell him you’re too sleepy to do that, but you’re interrupted when he scoops up your moisturizer himself and grabs your arm to lather it on. So he does that for a while. Makes sure you’re all soft while you’re trying not to cry. Being sick makes you an emotional mess already and the care of which Frankie is handling you is almost too much, but you miss his touch when he finishes. 

Then you turn your head towards Frankie because you hear something else being opened. It’s your massage oil and you want to tell him he doesn’t have to. He’s already doing so much for you, but his look alone tells you to be silent. Let me do this for you.

You’re tense at first but the massage he gives as he’s spreading the oil that he warmed between his hands feels so good. Your body aches temporarily nonexistent as he touches you.

You feel the need to break the moment and be playful because you’re not used to this. You’re not used to someone being all in for the good and the bad. The tears are building up again and just manage to keep it from reaching past your eyes.

So he compromises.

“How about this, I’ll cop a feel. Just go straight for a boob grab. Okay?”

And as quiet as you can be because you didn’t want to break the welcomed and dare you say it loving silence you’ve found yourself in. “Okay.”

And just for a little bit the body aches don’t exist with every pass of his hands. Just Frankie handling you like a delicate thing until you fall asleep from under him.

He covers you with a fleece blanket, pulling one leg out the side so you don’t overheat, and plugs in the humidifier before going back to the kitchen to make you soup.

[samwisethewitch]

Earth-Friendly Witchcraft

Whatever religious or spiritual tradition they identify with, most witches agree that there is something sacred about the natural world. We draw our power from the earth beneath our feet, the sky over our heads, and the air in our lungs.

And yet, many of us live in societies that are actively contributing to the destruction of the natural world. Most developed nations have a linear economy, which means resources are extracted and then sent on a one-way trip to consumers who will use them and then throw them away. This leads to overflowing landfills, air and water pollution, and quickly disappearing resources. The World Economic Forum predicts that, if our habits don’t change, there will be more plastic than fish in the ocean by 2050. And I dearly hope that by now we’re all familiar with the reality of climate change and its devastating impact on global ecosystems.

I’m not trying to scare you, but I do want to point out the hypocrisy of drawing power from the Earth in our magic while simultaneously contributing to her destruction. If we truly want to consider ourselves spiritual allies of the planet, we need to make an effort to live our lives — and practice our magic — in ways that are less harmful to her.

You don’t have to become an environmentalist or switch to a zero waste lifestyle, but we can all make little changes for a more sustainable life. There’s lots of information out there about how to live a more Earth-friendly lifestyle, so in this post I’ll be focusing on how to apply that same philosophy to your witchcraft.

Steps to a more Earth-Friendly Practice:

Limiting your consumption will automatically lower your negative impact on the planet. Follow my previous guidelines for avoiding consumerism to start shrinking your carbon footprint.

Avoid plastic as much as possible. According to the WEF, 70% of our plastic ends up in a landfill or in the world’s waterways, and according to Julia Watkins, author of Simply Living Well, only 9% of household plastics get recycled. Plastic (unlike glass and metal) cannot be recycled indefinitely — it can only be recycled a handful of times before it becomes too degraded to be repurposed any further. There really is no way to make plastic safer for the planet, so it’s best to just avoid it altogether. Look for tools made of metal, wood, or glass instead of plastics, and try to order things shipped in paper and cardboard when possible.

Create spells that won’t leave leftovers. One of the big contributing factors to our current environmental crisis is that we just produce too much waste. You can avoid this in your magical practice by crafting spells that won’t leave you throwing away a big ball of candle wax, herbs, and paper. Kitchen magic is a no-brainer for this, since kitchen spells are meant to be eaten. If you want to do a candle spell, use small candles that will burn up completely — I find larger candles are more likely to leave leftover wax. Making magical bath salts is another great option for leftover-free spells — just make sure everything you include is safe to go down the drain and won’t contribute to water pollution!

Forage for your own spell materials. One of the best ways to avoid plastic packaging and cut down on emissions from shipping is to use materials from your backyard! Learn about the plants, animals, and minerals native to your area, and take regular nature walks where you can gather what you need. Remember to only take as much as you need and to be careful never to damage the plants you harvest from. Make sure to carefully disinfect any animals bits you pick up — you can do this by burying them in salt for a full moon cycle and/or setting them in the sun/under a UV light for several days. If you find a dead animal and want to strip and clean its bones for use in ritual, this is a much more involved process and will require special research, equipment, and lots of time. And, of course, never eat anything you have foraged unless you happen to have an advanced degree in botany.

Keep a magical garden. Another great way to connect with the planet and shrink your carbon footprint is to grow your own herbs, vegetables, and fruits. You can, of course, grow food for your kitchen if you have space, but even if you live in a tiny apartment you can grow a handful of magical herbs in pots. For a list of common houseplants and their magical associations, check out this post.

Shop for spell materials at a local farmer’s market. Buying local is a great way to avoid the environmental impact of shipping produce, and it allows you to support small farms. Farmer’s markets also typically carry seasonal produce, which can help you align your magical practice with the cycles of nature. Farmer’s markets are a great way to find seasonal fruits and vegetables for kitchen magic, but you can use the produce you find there for other types of spells as well.

Trade paraffin wax candles for beeswax or soy wax. Paraffin, the material used for most cheap candles, is a by-product of crude oil, which is not only highly unsustainable but contains carcinogens (chemicals that may cause cancer). Beeswax is a sustainable alternative, and beeswax candles produce a “clean” burn, meaning it does not negatively affect air quality. Soy wax is a slightly pricier, vegan-friendly sustainable option that also produces a clean burn.

Use undyed, unbleached paper for your written spells. The bleaches and dyes used in most commercially available paper have a toxic effect on the environment. Colored paper cannot be recycled or composted because it will contaminate everything it touches. Use plain, unbleached paper for your written spells, especially if you plan to bury them in the ground or dispose of them outside.

Make sure your essential oils are ethically harvested. Essential oils are tricky — although they are marketed as natural, many of them are produced through unsustainable methods. Because essential oils are concentrated, it may take thousands of pounds of plants to produce a single pound of oil. This can have a devastating impact, especially for endangered plants like white sage or palo santo. Look for ethically-sourced, wild-harvested essential oils — these are oils that are gathered from the wild in ways that don’t hurt the local ecosystem. Mountain Rose Herbs and Eden’s Garden are two brands that are committed to sustainable essential oil production.

Instead of burying a spell in a jar, bury it in a hollowed-out fruit or vegetable. Many traditions call for spells to be buried in the ground. Items like jar spells and witch bottles are traditionally buried on the witch’s property. The problem with this is that plastic and glass bottles do not biodegrade, and will remain in the ground for years. Instead of putting these materials in the ground, bury your spells in a hollowed-out fruit or vegetable. As a bonus, you can choose this item to support your intention. For example, you might use an apple for a love spell or a spicy pepper for protection. Just make sure everything inside the spell is also biodegradable!

Keep a compost pile as an offering to your local land spirits. Compost is an easy way to reduce food waste, and it gives your garden a boost! Even if you don’t have your own garden, you can give your compost to a fiend who does or look into donating it to a community garden. When composting, it’s important to maintain a balance between carbon-rich “brown” ingredients (leaves, undyed paper, cardboard, etc.) and nitrogen-rich “greens” (fruit and veggie scraps, coffee grounds, egg shells, etc.) — you want about four times as much brown as green in your compost. Start your compost with a layer of brown — preferably twigs or straw to allow good airflow. Alternate layers of green and brown materials as you add to the pile. Every time you add to your compost, verbally express your gratitude to the land spirits. Your compost should be moist, but not soggy — you’ll know it’s ready when it’s dark and crumbly and smells like soil.

Make your own tea blends with loose herbs and a reusable tea strainer instead of buying teabags. Witches and tea go together like peanut butter and chocolate, but the individual wrappers on teabags create a lot of waste. On top of that, since many of these wrappers are dyed, they may not even be recyclable. Keep your teas earth-friendly by buying dried herbs in bulk and blending your own teas. Making your own blends is not only better for the planet, but also allows you to choose each ingredient for a specific magical intention.

Find ways to use your trash in your craft. This one is pretty self-explanatory. Instead of throwing things away, find ways to use them in your magic! Use food scraps from cooking, like carrot greens and potato peels, in spells. Turn an old shoe box into a travel altar. Add your coffee grounds to spells to ground them and manifest results in the physical world. You get the idea. Be creative!

Research different models for Earth-friendly living, like the zero waste/low waste lifestyle, sustainability, and the solarpunk movement. This will give you more ideas for a sustainable lifestyle, as well as a sustainable magical practice.

The funny thing about Earth-friendly living is that, the more time you spend taking care of the planet, the more connected you feel to it. I encourage you to try some of the ideas on this list — you’ll be amazed by how quickly you develop a deeper relationship with the Earth and all her creatures.

Resources:

Of Blood and Bones by Kate Freuler

Simply Living Well by Julia Watkins

“By 2050, there will be more plastic than fish in the world’s oceans, study says” from The Washington Post

A Sustainable Mind podcast

Practical(ly) Zero Waste podcast

[winslowat3am]

Hi! I was the one that asked you about the candles the other day, sorry to bother you again! The candles you recommended were so gorgeous I ordered some candles and bath salts for my mom! What type of dried flowers or herbs do you buy for candles? :)

You're not bothering me, sweetie, it's fine. I purchase bundles or I use the plants from my garden. You can buy little containers, baggies or jars of flowers, crystals & herbs that are as cheap as $5.00. Dried fruit, too. I think the containers may be cheapest & you can buy it all in a variety bulk. I get the big boxes with everything included & bouquets, which can be up to $130.00. But if you're budgeting then a haul of everything should cost no more than $15.00-$20.00. Some people sell the bags of flowers for $1.00. So you know what I mean:

I love to buy eucalyptus bunches & hang them in my shower. I use a bit of everything for candles, decor, soap bars, epsom salts, body oils, fragrances, tea, as long as it smells & looks good. I'm glad you liked everything! Let me know if you want any links or need any more help! ʕ·ᴥ·ʔ✨

[5lazarus]

Salt, Flesh, Heat

Bull notices that Solas is a deeply sensual person, reveling in clean clothes, good-smelling herbs, and hot water. He's also deeply masochistic. When the two find themselves enjoying the baths one early morning in Skyhold, Bull decides to press. Solas decides to play along. A @black-emporium-exchange gift for gamerfic. Read the other works in the AO3 Collection here! Read the story on Archive of Our Own here.

Steam on skin, worn wood pressing slick into his back as each vertebrae clicks: the Iron Bull sighs as he unwinds in the Skyhold baths. Few beyond the servants and the hungriest soldiers and Josephine herself were up at this hour. Bull has the steam room to himself. Carefully he unwinds his bulk onto the bench, laying his towel over his eyes. The clearcut eucalyptus smell lingers on his skin, sweated into his muscles. He groans aloud as a muscle in his bad knee pops.

“Fuck, that’s good,” he grunts.

Then the door opens and the dawn rushes in. Bull lifts the towel from his remaining eye. Solas stands there, a bit nonplussed. Shit, Bull thinks, and slowly makes room.

Solas lets the door close firmly shut. He holds a bundle of white birch twigs and dried eucalyptus.

Bull grins. “Want me to hit you with that?”

Solas climbs onto his bench and drapes himself on the upper story. “That may not be necessary.” Right, Bull thinks, you self-flagellate enough for both of us. He inhales deeply. “Would you mind putting more water on the stone? Some of the steam escaped.”

Bull says, “Uh, sure.” Slowly, because the ache in his body is delicious and he savors it, he reaches for the ladle and throws another pail of water onto the heating stones, and then another, and another. He hears Solas settle onto his bench, right leg stretched out. Bull turns to look. The man’s pale, graying red hair trailing down his chest. Dorian managed to catch a glimpse of his cock when they bathed after a particularly fetid journey into a Dalish swamp, and reported that it was the largest he’d ever seen on an elf and one of the bigger he’d seen on a man. Bull has to admit he is curious.

Amusement in his voice, Solas says, “Are you quite done?” Still tense, he turns away from Bull. He’s wiry, built broader in the shoulder and legs than most mages he’s met, but still has a weak core. Blackwall told him he’s fought in “some elven skirmish,” and he looks like a man about to retire from the field. He has a slashed scar on his right shoulder and claw marks on his right leg.

“Where’d you get that?” Bull points.

Solas does not turn around. Bull’s eyes travel down his back and rest on his well-shaped ass and thighs. Solas is a bit too thin for him, practically speaking, but he does like to look. He’s built like a dancer gone to middle age, rather than some Emerald Knight stalking the Dales for humans to kill, or—so he has heard from Ben-Hassrath stationed in the outskirts of the Tirashan—Dhal’Vallaslin chasing down strange elves with crimson vallaslin, who sacrifice the living to their long-forgotten gods. He seems more the type to plan and give orders, than carry out the dirty work himself, though of course Bull has seen him do it. He saw what he did with those Kirkwall mages.

Bull asks, voice casual, “You know, you’re kinda built like a dancer.”

At that, Solas shifts. He opens a single blue eye, looking down at him like a large cat eying a much smaller, squeakier dog. “I was many things, as a youth.”

“A dancer?” Bull says, taken aback, and slightly turned on.

“Not that,” Solas laughs. “And you, Iron Bull? Were you ever a—performer in your youth?” Solas slowly raises to his knees and leans over, taking the ladle from him. In one easy swoop, he throws more water onto the steaming rocks, and leans against the wall, inhaling deeply.

Bull says, a tad defensively, “That’s not how we do things in the Qun. I was earmarked for the Ben-Hassrath pretty early on.”

Solas says, “But there are many ways of being a spy, regardless of how your government attempts to standardize. Though I suppose you are too—big for the more subtle aspects of infiltration work.” He stretches. During his time with the Inquisition, he has put on enough weight and muscle that his ribs no longer show.

Bull says, “I did my job okay. Most of it is people-work. Watching, being watched. Don’t need a lot of variety in that.” He snorts. “The less, the better.” He eyes the bushel of branches Solas brought with him to the bania. The eucalyptus mingles wonderfully with the heady scent of sweat. He says, “Are you sure you don’t want me to hit you with that? That’s why you brought that here, right? I thought that was just a Dalish thing.”

He’s hit a nerve. Solas says sharply, “The Dalish do not monopolize all aspects of what has become of my people’s culture. And one simply…rubs the body with it, harder force is not necessary.”

“Ah,” Bull teases, “but if you really want to get the eucalyptus into the skin.”

“And I assumed this early, I would be alone,” Solas says flatly. “How is your knee, Iron Bull?”

Bull grunts, “Shitty. Running from all those demons tore it up again. But this helps. How’s yours?”

Solas pauses. Bull edges to the intersection of the benches, trying to find enough space to spread his leg out without having to sit on the floor. He maneuvers his bulk carefully, and gently lifts his bad leg onto the bench, folding his good leg underneath. It’s a vulnerable position, but he can see the door.

Finally, Solas admits, “My sleep has been disrupted with the amount of strain I’ve put my body through. I am hoping this will help before I must return to my desk and Vivienne’s lectures, as we calculate yet again the futility of using templars to isolate the rifts.”

Bull chuckles. “She’s still on that?”

“She has relented that a team of templars cannot hold the perimeter by themselves. We differ on how many mages are needed to perform the ritual to stabilize the Veil, and how vulnerable it leaves them.”

Bull says, “Give yourself a little bit of a good thing before you charge into the bad. That’s what I like about you, Solas.”

“Oh?” Carefully Solas climbs down onto the lower bench, favoring his unscarred leg.

“You know, you’re such a sensualist. You clearly like the baths, you don’t mind talking, you like the birch broom and feeling your blood roil and all that. I’ve seen you flirt with the Inquisitor before, and you were positively purring at the Winter Palace. But!”

“But,” Solas repeats, looking up at him. “But?” He is enjoying this, Bull is amused to realize. He enjoys it when people talk about him. As a younger man he must have preened. With that red hair, he would’ve had to.

Bull says, “But you never go all the way. You never fully surrender yourself to it. You get tipsy but not drunk. And you never let yourself alone with the Inquisitor, or anyone, really.”

“I am here with you,” Solas points out.

Bull shrugs. “And even though you like to talk, you like to argue, to debate, you never hang around the Mage’s Tower, or go back to the tavern with Dorian and the others. You keep patching up your shitty homespun even though with the Inquisition salary, you can buy yourself proper robes. You’re a masochist, man. I’ve never met someone so—sensual—who likes to torment himself so much.”

Solas is silent. Sweat pours from both their bodies, dampening the smooth hot wood. He fingers the bundle of oak twigs and eucalyptus, rubbing a single leaf with his thumb. Lowly, voice pooling like steam, he says, “Surely I do not need to tell you of the pleasure of desire, long-denied, finally sated. Or of living simply, with the occasional indulgence in luxury. After all, what is an elvhen apostate to do with silk? I take pleasure in making and mending my own garments, Iron Bull. As for other indulgences of the body…”

He trails off and Bull swallows heavily. He flicks his tongue around his lips. The air tastes of clean water and sweat: his own and the sharper, earthier scent of the elf’s. Every species has their particularities.

Bull says, “In the Qun, we believe in moderation, sure. And if you’re into edging, more power to you. But you know that’s not what I mean. If someone ends up that tightly-wound, that isolated, the Tamassrans intervened—“

“And if you do not give a proper showing of yourself, they break your mind and set you sweeping floors,” Solas says flatly. “I have seen how such authoritarian systems deal with dissenters. I take my pleasure in my own ways, in my own time. Not at my commander’s orders.”

Bull says, “It’s not like that. Sometimes you just need a good fuck, or a massage, or to be sat down in a discussion group with the priests and get into an argument all night long. The Tamassrans just prescribe the medicine. It’s good, it works. Keeps you from going too far.”

“Which is precisely why there is no Tal-Vashoth problem in Par Vollen,” Solas says. “Once, while in the Fade—“

Bull groans, “Right, let’s put some demons into this.”

Solas says, “Do you ever tire of repeating what your elders have told you, or would you like to learn something? Once, in the Fade, I saw a young Qunari working in a simple kitchen, baking bread as she was ordered every morning.”

“Cute,” Bull says. “So I’m not the only Qunari you’ve asked about their horns.”

Solas ignores the dig. He continues, “In every loaf she broke the rules. She’d take a pinch of sugar and would fold it to the center, like a secret.” He leans back with a fond smile. “And this act of small rebellion brought a shining smile across her face.” He spreads his hands, as if he has laid a winning flush in their game.

Bull thinks, you had to have been a slave. Are you the baker? Rather than provoke him further, Bull takes a different tact. “Hey, Solas. Why do you shave your head?”

Solas blinks. He raises a hand to his scalp, which is beginning to get bristly again. He says, “Fastidiousness, or lack of fastidiousness. Take your pick.”

Bull says, “No, really. If you can ask me how I put on a shirt I can ask you about your hair. Why do you keep it shaved? You’re not naturally bald, are you?”

Solas eyes him. “I am certain you have heard Dorian complain, at length, of the difficulties of keeping his hair perfectly coiffured and shaved while traveling. I have been nomadic most my life. It became easier, this way. Particularly since it is such a prominent color.” He shifts slightly.

Bull says, “Hey, I like red heads.”

“I know you do.”

“Don’t you ever think about growing it out?”

Solas laughs. “No. Never.” He pops his knee up and stretches his other leg, sighing as the muscles in his back audibly crack. Taking the bath broom, he begins rubbing the leaves into his skin. The air fills with its medicinal scent, and under that: earth.

Bull says, “I can rub that into your back.”

Solas says, “I prefer to take my pleasures simply.”

Bull says, “But I can look.”

Solas rolls his shoulders back and begins rubbing the bundle into his arms, swiping sweat away. “I never said you could not.”

Bull, frustrated, brings his bad leg down with a thump. He says, “You gonna take a dip in the cooling pool? Or is that too much of an indulgence for you?”

“My people first discovered this way of bathing,” Solas says distractedly. “I will take any opportunity to enjoy it now that I can, however primitive our facilities in Skyhold.”

“You’ve got baths, out in the woods?”

“You’ve never built a steam hut, and then flung yourself into a snow drift? Really, the Qun did not let you enjoy your youth.”

“But your people did,” Bull says, seizing on this note of autobiography.

Solas places the bundle on the bench. He stands up in silence and tosses another ladle of water onto the furnace. The room fills with steam, and Bull feels sweat pool in the back of his head.

Solas takes his towel and wraps it loosely around his waist. Looking over his shoulder, he says, “I took pleasure when it came my way.” With that rejoiner, he grins, and opens the door. Bright light and cool air pools in; the steam thins. The day has begun. Solas leaves.

Alone in the steam room, wonderfully hard, the Iron Bull says, “Fuck.”

[faranae]

I can't find your bread recipe :( with the tag bread queen there are only three posts and none of them is your wonderful recipe where it how can I find it? Ly

Oh! I had to switch accounts at some point last year, that’d probably do it. Hold on I got you! The reblog it’s posted on is here, and since it’s about time I copied it into its own post anyway… With a few minor edits: 

—

Two adulting (kitchen-related) tips from me!

1. Buy a roll of parchment paper from the cooking shit aisle. A big roll will last you for-fucking-ever. Pretty much any time you’re using a baking pan you can line it with that stuff and save yourself A: food sticking to the pan and B: it’s a quick rinse and it’s clean.

2. Bread can get fucking expensive, so make your own. A bigass bag of flour and a bag of active dry yeast (store it in the friiiiidge!!!) works out a FUCK of a lot cheaper than buying bread at the store, and you can do so much more with it. Bread, pizza, rolls, cinnibuns, homemade pizza pockets. It seems intimidating but it’s stupid easy.

Seriously. It’s stupid simple to make, and most of the “3 hours” to make it is sitting around surfing the internet or doing whatever the fuck you want while the dough rises. If you have an afternoon free once a week to sit and play video games or surf the net, you have the time to make your own bread on the cheap. 

Here’s my simple-as-fuck recipe:

2 ¼ teaspoons active dry yeast (You can buy a bag of this stuff CHEAP in bulk stores, the little single-serve packets are hella stupid priced)

1 cup warm water (think a hot bath)

1 ½ teaspoons sugar

2 tablespoons oil (any kind works for the most part)

2 ¼ cups flour

1 teaspoon salt

1. Stir the yeast, water, sugar, and oil up in a bowl. Let it sit for about 10 minutes. It will foam up VERY high, this is the yeast getting happy! If it doesn’t get all foamy, the water may have been too hot or not hot enough. Remember, Yeast is alive! Treat it like a nice girlfriend!

2. Mix your flour, salt, and the yeast concoction up in a bowl.

3. Knead that shit for about 5 minutes. It will start sticky as heck, but will come together into a nice dough. If it’s still super sticky, toss in a bit more flour. The dough should feel silky to touch if you’ve done it long enough. Here’s how to knead it:

4. Put your dough in a covered, lightly oiled bowl and leave it someplace warmish for an hour. At that point it will have roughly doubled in size, give it a gentle punch to release the gasses that have built up inside. Cover it again and let it sit for a bit longer.

Boom. You have bread dough. Here are some baking times and uses for ya:

Optional egg-wash: Just crack an egg into a bowl, add a pinch of salt or some water if you’re game, and mix the bejeebus out of it with a fork. Brush (or if you’re like me, goop it on with said fork) that shit thinly on bread before baking for a nice crust.

Pizza: Stretch it on a pan, stab the fucker all over with a fork, add toppings, bake 425*F 15-20 minutes. Roughly the same process for pizza pockets, just with more filling and pinching it shut before baking.

Bread Sticks: Make snake-shapes, let rest on pan 10-ish minutes, bake 400*F 10-20 minutes.

Dinner rolls/Pullaparts: Make ball-sized (yes those balls) balls. Place on greased pan, let rest 10-20 minutes to rise. Egg-wash and bake 375*F 25 minutes.

Bread: Lightly score (cut) the top, let sit for 20-ish minutes on/in whatever you’re using to bake it, egg-wash, bake at 375*F for 20-ish minutes. It’s done when it sounds hollow if you knock on the bottom. If it sounds solid, it’s still doughy.

You bet your ass you can deep-fry this shit for cheapie yeast doughnuts. Roll that shit in sugar or dip it in whatever, it’s fucking tasty.

Bagels: YES. YOU. CAN. Form bagel-shapes out of the dough and boil them in salty water for about 2 minutes. Egg-wash them and bake them at 400*F for 10 minutes.

Cinnamon Rolls: Roll that shit out into a rectangle. Brush it with a mix of butter, cinnamon, sugar, and a pinch of salt (no exact amounts here, do it to your taste). Roll it up into a log, and cut it into discs. Let them sit 20 minutes in a pan and then bake at 375*F 15-17 minutes. I can personally vouch for these coming out amazing! If you bake them long enough, the filling will caramelize on the bottom of the pan into pseudo-crunchy-sweet-buttery candy, and if you’re using parchment paper it’ll pop right off for indulgent consumption. 

You can add whatever you want to the dough for some variety, just if it’s dried spices remember you really only need 1-ish tablespoons. I personally like making bread with about 1 tablespoon of dill in the dough. Roll it out flat, sprinkle it with cheddar, roll it into a log, squeeze the ends shut, and bake it like a regular loaf of bread. Cheesy dill bread OMNOMNOM.

That got a bit long. But yeah. Bread’s expensive, yo. Save your wallet.

(Also it’s ridiculous amounts of therapeutic to bake, for me anyway.)

[magic-and-maybess]

Sasha scent hcs

I know this is so weird but pls just stick with me here

She smells very warm. Marcy alikens it to a sunny day, right as the sun sets on a strawberry field. Anne thinks of it as cookies baking in the oven, almost done but not quite. Grime thinks she smells like the first real home he’s ever had.

She uses a mousse in her bangs. It’s called ocean breeze, but it smells more like a salt lamp in the middle of a dark bedroom at a sleepover where girls have been burning strawberry and vanilla candles from Bath and Body Works all night and spraying rose perfume into the air, high on giggles and sugar cookies stolen from a pantry in hushed whisperes and socked feet on tile.

Her shampoo is strawberry. The kind that can be bought in bulk for a discount and smells a little like scented floam and a little like dried roses, for some reason. There’s very few notes of actual strawberries, but berries are still the first thought to come to mind when smelling it. 

Her conditioner is raspberry. It’s almost the same pink shade as the shampoo, very easy to mistake for a matching set. they go well together anyway, berry and berry. If they were good quality, it might be a nauseating combination, but they just smell vaguley fruity and sweet in Sasha’s hair.

Her body wash is milk and honey. The bright yellow of the bottle was inticing, standing out from the rest of the shelf. The smell is intoxicating, it’s that good. The perfect notes of sweet and warm and calm. It bubbles up and creates kaleidoscopes of light that burst when touched, broken the moment a delicate finger breaches the surface.

Her lip balm is vanilla. Shoplifted, maybe. Small enough to slip into a pocket unseen. Worn down from months of use, the one person able to not lose a chapstick. It’s frequented in the drier months of winter and forgotten in the summer in favor of shiny lip gloss by the same flavor.

Her perfume is summer daisies. The abstract concept smells kind of like what would happen if you dipped a flower, any flower, into vanilla extract. Worn on the wrists and occassionally behind the ears if she’s feeling fancy. it’s faint, but it’s there.

Her body spray is rose. It’s technically a ‘revitalizing pick-me-up rose mist’. Recieved a free gift for buying a face wash. The kind that you set in your skin care drawer and forget about for two months and then find it again and spray it to see if it’s still good type of product. 

Honestly wtf was this, i wrote it between crying about an english assignment and swapping out taylor swift records. 

[malereader-inserts]

Making Things Better

Fandom: Good Omens Pairing: Crowley x Male!Reader x Aziraphale Summary: Even, if you’ve had the worst day, your boyfriends seems to make it better. Word Count:  1,089 Request: Can I ask for some Ineffable husbands with the reader having a bad day and those two just being incredible trying to get him in a good mood? I'm really sorry if it's vague Warning: Description of depression

You really weren’t having the best day at all.

You woke up being absolutely tired, it’s something you should really get used to (and you are) but today was different. Like other days you feel exhausted from staying up late and overthinking, but when you woke up today, it seems like life was weighing heavier than usual. Your shoulders hurt and your back ached, there was the edging feeling of the need to cry.

And you’re not afraid to cry.

Nevertheless, you got up, slowly. You took a shower, because if you’re required human interaction - you had to at least smell decent. It was a five minute wash, just your body. You put dry shampoo because Crowley got it for you, he likes to keep his locks looking fresh every day and when he found out your struggles - you make your life easier and not wash your hair, he gave you a can of dry shampoo. 

You leave for work, it was a simple workplace. Just in the local supermarket by you, but since you’ve been deemed as an essential worker for the last few months - you’ve met an assortment of people. And, in your frame of mind, it’s something you really in the headspace for. Still, you put on your mask and lifted your eyes to give them life as you walked in to work. 

You were assigned in stacking shelves, keep them full because even when the panic buying has subsided, people are buying in bulks for the week. Of course, it was not bad, managed to mess around with co-workers you adored. But, that doesn’t stop the entitle people bothering you and making your day worst. 

Of course, you got assigned to the register, scanning people’s items - you were met with assholes, respectful teens and the odd elderly person. Some people complaining about the price of the total, in which you had to explain why it was the price because someone thought it was on half price but wasn’t before, they start cussing you out.

And even when your shift was finished, your day got worst as you had to run back home in the rain. You arrive home and ate at least a little bit, you headed to your next job. You live in London, and London isn’t cheap at all. Your second job? Being a waiter, and you know you’re going to get hurled abuse.

The restaurant was a nice place to work, it had good pay, good managers and good owners who all cared about their employees. It made working there a lot bearable, and you got along with your fellow waiters and waitress, you could make jokes with the cooks. But, it was peak hours at night, meaning the people that booked tables, are usually entitled as fuck. With a mask on, you tried to prepare yourself for the night. 

Mothers snapping their fingers at you for your attention, dads making rude comments to the waitress and when you called them out, the harassed you - luckily, one of the managers intervened. Of course, you had bratty little kids with no one minding them, making a mess on the table - salt, pepper, and all the sauces - even worst when they get their food. 

Your section seemed to be the worst that night, and you were ready to break down and cry. Of course, the night can’t go amiss without some spillages and the people you were serving scream and shout at how careless you were even if it wasn’t your fault. Then, the drunk idiots throwing up, spewing all over.

It wasn’t the greatest day, you barely ate or slept. Meanwhile, your loving boyfriends had not heard from you at. Usually, between your work, you could call, but you didn’t. If you could, you would sneak a text, but heard nothing. So, they decided to meet you at your apartment.

“I do hope he’s okay,” Aziraphale worried as Crowley scoffs.

“Oh, he will be, Angel, you worry too much.”

As you walk back home, in the pouring rain as your umbrella broke half-way through the walk, you were soaked. So, you wanted to lie in bed, slamming the door open making the two celestial beings jump. 

“Darlin- Why are you wet?”

You looked at Crowley and responded, “The rain.”

You sounded so exhausted, and when the words “Are you okay?” were uttered out, your lips quivered. Hands shaking, your eyes started to close up to stop the tears falling. You sniffled before your shoulders drop.  Your eyes drip with tears. Your walls, the walls that hold you up just collapse. Moment by moment, they fall. Salty drops fall from your chin, drenching your shirt. Aziraphale was quick to engulf you into a hug.

Crowley sighs and rubs your back. It seems like the two beings had an internal conversation as the two started to move. Aziraphale started to slowly move you along and Crowley snaps his fingers, you could hear the bath running and your demon boyfriend running to get you warm clean clothes, then you could hear the kettle boil with the courtesy of your beloved angel.

“Bad day?” Your angel cooed.

You nodded tearfully, “The worst.”

Your angel nods, slowly pulling your clothes off you so it doesn’t stick and get you sick. Crowley grabs your hand, gently, his warm hands rubbing against yours to start insulating you as he guides you to the bath as Aziraphale starts cooking for you. Crowley lathers you, massage your shoulders and your back and offering anywhere in your body where it aches.

Whilst you can’t wash the feeling of dread and sadness away, at least you have your boyfriends to make your day just a little bit better.

“Who do I need to tempt then?”

“I didn’t catch any names,” You murmured as Aziraphale comes waltzing into the bathroom with a tray of food looking at you and Crowley disapprovingly.

“Now, now, we don’t need to go that far,” Aziraphale tuts.

“I think we do,” Crowley sits behind you, trying not to get wet as his hands run through your hair, massaging your scalp with suds of shampoo, “No one hurts our baby boy.”

“Not a baby,” You vocalised, sighing, “I am fully grown!”

“We’re aware.”

“Sounds really ominous, Crowley.”

As Aziraphale chuckles and feeds you, despite your protest and Crowley carefully cleaning you, you felt better as if the burden of the world you felt this morning slowly lifted from your shoulders. You feel better and a lot safer in your boyfriends’ presence.

[icarusthelunarguard]

This Week’s Horrible-Scopes

Aries

Watching Internet Arguments evolve in real time is an interesting thing; you get to watch how people both do and don’t understand a topic while clearly ignoring the little red squiggly line under every spelling mistake they make. Just sit back and know that you’ve done exactly what WOPR suggested: The Only Winning Move Is Not To Play.

Taurus

We told you about the re-issued Lamborghini Countache and you just HAD to borrow one, didn’t you? Sure, you could have outrun the police in that sucker, but did you HAVE to scrape the rims on the curb straight away?! Why not just put an evil villain mustache on the Mona Lisa or give The Statue of David a circumcision while you’re at it too? You monster!

Gemini

There’s nothing wrong with staying home this week. You've got popcorn, butter, salt, a wok, and so many Blu-Ray movies you haven’t watched yet that you might as well enjoy it. And since it’s summer, just put on a bathing suit and you can lay out on a lounger while it rains, imagining you’re under a waterfall.

Cancer Moon-Child

For most people getting local fauna to eat out of their hands would be an impressive feat. The only reason the local deer population eats from yours is because you sweat a lot and they’re licking all the salt off. To that end, stay hydrated and eat well.

Leo

Keep sweets out of your house this week. The temptation to eat them and stock up on calories for the winter is a bad idea. Instead buy a heavy-duty deep freezer, a couple cords of firewood for heating and cooking, and a radio scanner to hear when someone’s hit a deer. Remember roadkill is free range, virtually free, and almost ready to eat since it’s already pre-grilled.

Virgo

Time for you to better understand finances, Virgo. Which costs more; a gallon of inkjet printer ink, or a gallon of thoroughbred horse semen? Here’s a hint: If a gallon of printer ink explodes in an office, they’ll clear out the whole office and get corporate HazMat folks to clean the stuff up. If a horse explodes in an office, chances are there’s a LOT more paperwork involved including asking Phil why he thought bringing his horse into work was a good idea.

Libra

You’ve got your choice of jobs today, Libra. You can either A) go back to H.R. investigating the operational rules regarding emotional support animals in the workplace, B) join the Maintenance Crew to clean up any workplace spills, or C) start your own mall kiosk business where people can charge up their devices while they walk around shopping. Call it “Charge ‘n Charge”. Remember i-Devices have to pay 1/3rd more.

Scorpio

Being a home brewer has not ended well. It’s one thing to learn how to clean the smell of fermented bread out of short-pile carpet, and wall paper, and drop ceiling panels, but it’s a whole other thing to remove all the broken glass shards from same. Mason jars are NOT used for home brewing for a reason!

Sagittarius

People in the U.S. don’t understand why “Ketchup Chips” are a THING in Canada, and never give a thought to french fries with ketchup. The folks in Canada don’t understand why Malt Vinegar isn’t a staple condiment in the U.S., but always shows up in fast food fish shops. If both sides could just come to an agreement about food, maybe our two countries would be a little nicer to each other. As an aside, how long DOES it take to roast a 5 Kilo Canada Goose? 3 hours at 190c.

Capricorn

Your new eatery, “Wrap It Up”, is going to continue to be a success! Buying supplies from other failed eateries will help reduce costs while you find your proper economic footing. Here’s something else you can do: Find YouTube videos that explain how to recreate various famous foods! Considering the promotion you just ended, PLEASE don’t start with Arby's “Horsey Sauce”.

Aquarius

With the school season starting up again it’s time to review what every student needs. Pencils? Still got about 700 of them from the kindergarten year’s bulk purchase. Lunchbox? Well, that’s more an insulated nylon bag now, but yep, got that. And last but not least, non-skid shoes for working in the kitchen? Yeah, your kid is working the pizza line at college this year. And you? You got old.

Pisces

If you work in online sales, we need you to do something for us all. If your website says, “Shop This Store”, we are expecting that a product we find listed is actually IN THE STORE NOW! No, we don’t want to buy it and have it shipped there. No, we don’t want to buy it and have it shipped to our home in 5 to 7 business days for free. We want to buy it at the store and take it home right there. Is that really that hard to understand? Now you talk to your managers and you fix the damned backend to read the store inventory or so HELP us, we will find a way to replace all your ethernet connections with TOKEN RINGS! And if you aren’t scared by that prospect, then you are NOT sufficiently high enough on the Depth Chart to do what needs to be done. Get someone else to do it.

[pastelpines]

Pastel Pines is your ultimate online store to buy essential oils, fragrances, sea shells, home decor and bath products. We provide quality bath products in Australia at affordable prices. Whether you are looking for massage oils or bath salts, we have you covered. To bulk buy bath salts, please visit our website: https://pastelpines.com/50-bath-pamper. For more information, please call on +61 (02) 4577 7111.

[themanicnami]

Hello there ! I recently stumbled upon witchcraft and am very interested to get into it. I have to be in the closet due to close-mindef family, and access to candles, herbs and crystals is kinda not possible. I was hoping for some advice. Thanks !

Hello Anon, welcome to our community! I understand having to remain in the forest or broom-closet though I do have some suggestions.

For Candles: you don’t need giant pillar candles or points, simple tea lights or scented candles that are commonly found in the home are just fine as well. I am not sure about your family but my family always was okay with me having scented candles as long as I only burned them with me in the room. Wax melts are also options, you can get a melter for about twenty dollars and hoard up on wax melts to use for their scents, colors and for the wax itself (sealing, stamping etc) For herbs: most herbs I use are straight from the kitchen. Some witches I know use tiny bead sorters and add a bit of herbs into each one and keep them in their rooms. Others just buy little bottles of herbs to keep in their room. You don’t need to buy giant bulk bags of anything even if they are useful if you use a specific ingredient often. Salt and Black pepper are both commonly used in witchcraft and can be easily found in dollar stores super cheap.

Crystals: can be more difficult depending on your family’s views. My family as example use crystals for home decor. I have some other friends who when living with parents would say they collected them for beading purposes (you can find chip crystals very affordable on etsy) or for rock collecting and just stuck to small crystals like the ones you can buy at gift shops for the “fit as many in the bag as you can” sort of deal.

Other suggested posts to check out:

Guide to Concealing Your Craft

Tips for New Witches

Mini Witch Kits & Travel Altars

Secret Witch Ask 

Tips for Secret Witches

Affordable and Unusual Ingredients

Infused Water for Magic

Playing Card Divination

Tea for Magic Correspondences

Fruit Tea Magic

Coffee Magic

Simple Bath Magic

Lush Bath Bomb Correspondences

Colormancy and Color Correspondences

Technopaganism 101 (and digital witchcraft)

[papa-nikki-writes]

Rowvember day 11-Profit

Profit

Definition

1. A financial gain, especially the difference between the amount earned and the amount spent in buying, operating, or producing something.

2. Advantage; benefit.

Summary: Pierce has always had an eye for opportunity, and that doesn’t change with his time in the Saints, now the Sons of Samedi aren’t his jurisdiction but that doesn’t mean he can’t offer helpful advice, right?

Words: 1,453

Money talks, Pierce had known that from a younger age than most, they always say money can’t buy happiness, that it isn’t everything, but in Pierce’s opinion those that said that usually knew nothing about struggling. If money was the only barrier between not eating right for a week or two, when you finally got food in you’d be laughing right?

      Money had also seen the rich judges son spared jail when Pierce had been locked up and the key thrown away, they were both dealing, they were both ex Vice Kings, it should have been fair. But it wasn’t. It never would’ve been. So when Pierce finally gotten out of jail he swore he’d do everything in his power to get money at any cost, to be rich, to be famous, so that the system couldn’t touch him.

     When he got out of jail however, he found Stilwater burning, and burning far worse than he had seen at the height of his stint in the Vice Kings, and his money making schemes were abandoned in favour of just staying alive. You watch, you wait, you build of course, a sentiment from Benjamin King he still held close to the chest, he would get his shot, he just had to wait it out. So the day he got that call from Gat out of the blue he saw his chance.

“O’Connor’s comin’ to get you, be ready.” was the sign off to the call, and after putting what would be his future Boss to the test, he knew this was where he had to be, cleaning up the city and maybe making a bit of money while he was at it.

       Boss was...difficult sometimes to say the least, charging headfirst into everything and everyone was a bit of a culture shock for someone that modelled himself after King, but he was learning to adapt. Or at least he thought he was, some days all he and Boss would do was argue all day, and it would put that in doubt.

       He tried to tell her, many times that whatever she needed he could get it done, he was confident, he got this, just listen and she’d take offence, but it wasn’t his fault he was competent, he just wanted her to see that. This wasn’t his first rodeo.

“And it isn’t mine either.” she snapped, “thank you very much.”

“I’m just sayin’, if we want to corner the Loa dust market, it isn’t enough to just destroy the Samedi’s, we need to have a hook, we need to have them keep comin’ back to us.” he said, and the Boss just stared at him. Her stare was intense, made him squirm in his seat like he was going to get the biggest telling off of his life, she shook her head, the hand she was was resting her head on shifted, gesturing vaguely in his direction.

“Why are you telling me things I already know, what’s your problem?”

“Problem? There’s no problem, I’m just trying to make you rich.”

“Great, then make me rich instead of just telling me you’re gonna make me rich.”

“We need a hook.” he repeated, and Shea turned her head to where Shaundi and Laura sat in awkward silence on the other side of the table with a smirk.

“Laura darling, put crack cocaine in the Loa dust I’m sure that’ll work.”

“Are you fuckin’ kiddin’ me?” Pierce asked,

“Boss, we can’t put crack cocaine in the Loa dust.” Shaundi said, deadpan.

“Are you fuckin’ kiddin’ me?!” Pierce repeated, and Boss whipped her head back round to face him, the look she was giving him definitely putting him in mind of his hardass principal from middle school. It didn’t make either women any less terrifying however. He stood his ground though, he had to. She would respect that at least. “What’s your problem?” he asked her, and he saw both her eyebrows raise, heard Shaundi hiss, grimacing as though someone stabbed her with a red hot poker.

“Shaundi, Laura give us five minutes yeah.” Boss finally said, and they left in a flurry, eager to be out of there as Shea’s eyes never left his face, and it was then that he wondered if he’d made a mistake. “You wanna know what my problem is?” she asked.

“I know what your problem is, it’s the Dex Ultor thing innit?” he guessed, he asked around after he heard Vogel bring him up, nothing that came back was positive, and that’s who he reminded her of? He’d fucking leave that, Dex was no better than Warren Williams or Tanya Winters in his opinion. They had capitalised on what they had of course, but it wasn’t anything he wanted a part of. Boss smiled, and it was then that he realised he definitely made a mistake.

“Tell me some of your weaknesses, go.”

“Is this a job interview?” he asked.

“Go I said.” she insisted with a nod, and Pierce grinned nervously.

“I have no weaknesses, I told you, I just get it done.”

“Look, I’m not asking for childhood trauma, we’re not really there yet, but the fact that you can’t even tell me one lets me know I’m right.”

“What?” he asked confused, and she tilted her head to one side.

“You’ve got no self awareness.” she said, and Pierce laughed, he couldn’t help it, The Boss, the walking nuke was telling him he had no self awareness?

“I have loads of self awareness.”

“Great, then tell me a weakness.”

“You tell me your weakness.” he shot back, and Boss smiled and held out a hand.

“Hi, I’m Shea, I’m an arsehole whose only skill in life is basically hurting people. I also don’t know how to delegate-” she paused, her brow furrowing, “-I could go on for the craic like but you aren’t ready for that conversation.” she said as Pierce awkwardly shook her hand, she took it back then, gesturing towards him. “See? It’s not that difficult. If you want to be confident, be confident I love that, but I’ve been around the block as much as you have, and I have to ask why you decided to follow me if you’re just gonna tell me what I already know, doesn’t that waste our time at the end of the day?”

“I guess?” Pierce asked, shrugging, and she tilted her head again.

“Now lets hear what you’ve got, your real plan this time.”

        Now that took him by surprise, usually Boss only listened to his plans when Shaundi said it, but there she was, staring at him again, this time expecting him to say something.

“Er, I was thinking of doing like a bulk offer yeah? You buy so much, maybe like ten bags and you get one free or something?”

“What like a Buckstar loyalty card?”

“Yeah, we can make ‘em on the cheap once we have our template- plus, one thing I know is that people like to collect shit,” he said, pulling a piece of paper towards him and drawing a happy stick person with ten crudely drawn bags on their arms. Boss leaned forward, and it emboldened him, she was listening at least, not outright slating the idea.

“It could work.” she mused.

“I mean, what have we really got to lose right? If we get the market cornered, once the money is flowing, one or two bags here and there in the grand scheme of things isn’t going to make much of a dent in our potential earnings.” he said, drawing stick figures of him and Boss rolling in money. “We get rich, and we have a happy customer loyal to us, what do you think?” he asked, looking round at her. She thought for a second as Pierce waited on the edge of his seat, before she nodded.

“I like it.” she said, and he breathed a sigh of relief, thank fuck for that. “You always had an interest in marketing, Pierce?”

“Nah, I just know what people like, I used to hit the library a lot at school, picked up a few Psychology books to read through and shit.”

“And how did you find Psychology?”

“Interesting, people are-well they are interesting. Oh!” he said, a sudden thought coming to him. “How about we spread a rumour that the Samedi curse their Loa Dust?” he asked and Boss tilted her head to one side.

“What if they aren’t superstitious.”

“Well we could always say it’s also cut with glass or bath salts.” he answered with a shrug, and a smirk pulled her lips upwards.

“Pierce, you’re a genius.” she said, and Pierce beamed, the compliment meaning more than he thought it would.

[thecosmetickitchen-blog]

Lockdown Bath Bombs

At the moment, the chances are that you can’t get hold of your favourite products from stores like Lush cosmetics - not to mention they cost a bomb (excuse the pun!) in the first place. That being the case, why not learn something new and enjoy making your own tailor-made at home? If you can get to the supermarket, the chances are you’ll be able to get most of these ingredients at home; if you can’t, don’t worry, you can order them online on either Amazon or eBay.

In order to make these truly cost-effective, you’ll need to buy the ingredients in bulk - but if you’re just doing this for a bit of fun, then there’s no harm in just scaling the recipe down and making whatever quantity you want.

I’d recommend reading this entire post first to give you an idea of what you’re doing, rather than starting and getting frustrated if you get lost on your way.

Before you begin, you’ll need some equipment on standby, including cup measures, tablespoon and teaspoon measures, a large bowl, a whisk, and a small bowl or jug. You’ll also need a spray bottle that creates a fine mist; ideally the spray bottle should be full of a 100% alcohol solution, but you can use water provided you don’t dampen the mix too much. You’ll also need some bath bomb moulds, which you can find cheap on eBay or Amazon. It’s up to you what size and shape you buy, and you can buy either clip-together moulds or press-together moulds (which is what I use).

The moulds I use are stainless steel and make bombs that are roughly 2.6-inches in diameter. If you can find stainless steel moulds, I’d recommend them, as the clip-together plastic moulds can sometimes break when you pull them apart, and the cheaper tin moulds can dent a bit easily. Here’s a few suggestions that you might want to investigate, but it’s entirely up to you - buy whatever suits your budget or whatever you like the look of:

Stainless Steel Sphere Moulds

Metal Moulds (Mixed Shapes)

Plastic Sphere Moulds

If you’ve been successful, then you should end up with a lovely, fizzy bomb that does something like this when you drop it in the bath:

So, what is going in to these bath bombs? Well, if you search the internet, you’ll find that there’s dozens of different recipes for these bombs; everyone has their own mix of things they like to include, so this is just my recipe. It’s the one I have success with, but I am not going to claim mine is the definitive recipe - play about and see what works for you.

Based on my 2.6-inch moulds, this gets me roughly 8 bath bombs, although on this occasion I only moulded 6 bombs and kept the rest to use as bath fizz - more on this later!

Ingredient Tip #1: One suggestion I have in regard to making bath bombs is regarding the use of vegetable glycerine (or any glycerine) in the mix. Some recipes do suggest it, but don’t do it, it can ruin your bombs! This is because glycerine is a natural humectant - which is the technical term to describe something that retains or preserves moisture. That makes it brilliant for the skin - but not so good for bath bombs. The reason for this is because bath bombs contain sodium bicarbonate (or Baking Soda, in the common tongue) which, if you didn’t already know, reacts with water and creates the fizz of the bombs. So including an ingredient that will draw in moisture from the air is a bad idea as it can start the fizzing reaction early, either ruining the bomb altogether or making it so that when you go to use the bomb, the fizz is all but gone.

Ingredient Tip #2: If you can find them, use fine Epsom salts as these will mix in better with the other ingredients and larger grains can make the mix very crumbly and harder to mould. It should also be noted that larger grains of salt can draw in moisture in a similar fashion to glycerine.

Ingredient Tip #3: Make sure all your ingredients are either food or cosmetic grade.

Ingredient Tip #4: If using colourants, make sure they’re water soluble otherwise they can stain your bath and ruin your life! You might also want to wear gloves if you’re using liquid or gel colours so they don’t stain your hands; you should be okay if working with mica powders.

Ingredient Tip #5: You can use whatever carrier oils you like for your mix, they don’t have to be the same as mine.

Ingredient Tip #6: If you’re using liquid dyes, remember that they will lighten once mixed with the dry ingredients, so you might want to add a little extra if you want to end up with stronger coloured bombs.

Dry Ingredients

2 Cups Cornflour

1.5 Cups Baking Soda

1.5 Cups Citric Acid

Two-thirds of a cup Epsom salts

.5 Cup Cream of Tartar

Mica powder (if you’re using powder and not a liquid dye)

Note: If you want to make a bubble bath bomb, then you can ditch the Cream of Tartar and use SLSA instead.

Wet Ingredients

3 Tablespoons of Fractioned Coconut Oil

2 Tablespoons of Vitamin E Oil

2 Teaspoons of Witch Hazel

Colourant

Scent (make this as strong or as weak as you like)

Method

1. Add all of your dry ingredients to a large bowl and mix them together with a whisk, until you have a fine white powder that looks like snow - and there are no large clumps of any one ingredient present. I used a liquid dye to colour my bombs, so I did that in the next step - but if you’re using a mica powder, add that now until you have the depth of colour that you want. Remember that with mica powder, a little usually goes a long way! If you have a respiratory problem, such as asthma, then I would recommend wearing a face mask while mixing these ingredients - especially if using SLSA which is a very fine powder and can easily irritate your lungs. You might also want to consider safety glasses if you are concerned about your eyes.

You can guy mica powders on eBay or Amazon, or through a specialist soap making site like these ones over at The Soap Kitchen.

If you want to make bombs that are multicoloured, my suggestion would be to wait until after you have mixed the dry and wet ingredients together, then to split the mix equally by weight to make however many colours you want, and then to add the colour - whether it be a liquid or powder. You’ll just need to give it a very thorough mix to blend it in.

2. In a bowl or jug, mix together the wet ingredients to the best of your ability. Obviously the Witch Hazel and oils will not mix as one is water based and the other isn’t - but that’s not to worry too much. Now is also the time to add in your liquid colours if doing so. On this occasion, I actually used a food gel colourant as I didn’t happen to have a soap dye in the colour I wanted, and the colour of food gels is very concentrated, so you generally don’t need to use a lot. Plus they can be cheaper to buy than some of the more expensive liquid dyes - not that any of the dyes are hugely expensive.

You can find a wide range of different dyes from natural to synthetic. The ‘cheaper’ ones can be more inclined to stain your bath, but this generally doesn’t happen unless you use a lot of it.

With some liquid dyes, you may need to dilute these in water first. If you have to do this, you might want to consider using the dye in place of the Witch Hazel and not as well as, as too much liquid can cause the reaction with the baking soda to begin and ruin your bombs - or make them a lot less fizzy!

Some dyes I found that you might want to check out:

Natural Dyes - The Soap Kitchen

Liquid Dyes - The Soap Kitchen

Zwanzer Dyes (20 Colour Assortment)

Now is also the time for you to add your scents. Again, there are loads of different brands that you can buy. I used the ones pictured below - because they come in some really ‘fun’ scents like Blueberry Muffin, Chocolate Orange and Pina Colada (which I used for this recipe) etc.

Pure Life (which I think may just be a rebrand of the ones pictured below) has all the traditional scents you would expect to find like lavender, rose, ylang ylang, sandalwood etc., but also has these funky fragrances too. You can buy their range here.

3. Now the time has come to add your wet ingredients to your dry ingredients. My suggestion here would be to add this in thirds, and give the mix a very thorough stir with your whisk before adding more. This is to mitigate your chances that the Witch Hazel or other water-based ingredients you use will cause a reaction with the baking soda. The oil-based products will not cause a reaction.

Once mixed together, you should end up with a snowy powder which is coloured and scented, but now also holds shape when you squeeze it - as if you were making a snowball.

4. Now is the time for the fun bit: making the bombs. This can be a little tricky, as it is somewhat dependent on the conditions you are working in: for instance, if you’re in a particularly dry climate, you might need to use a little more moisture than if you’re in a humid climate. But the principle is essentially the same: using your spray bottle of pure alcohol (ideally) or water if not, give the mix a couple of very quick sprays just to dampen it slightly. You do not want to soak the mix, only make it mouldable!

Now work quickly to get the mix into the moulds - alcohol spray will evaporate quite quickly, which is what makes it preferable, as it will evaporate out of the bombs, leaving them dry, and not giving them a chance to start a reaction.

Using a spoon, or your palm, press the mix into the mould until it’s quite condensed. Before pushing or clipping the moulds together, remember to slightly overfill them so that the two halves fuse together and join.

If you’re using clip-together moulds, then you can leave them in the mould to set overnight before gently opening the mould and tapping them out. If you’re using a push-together mould, using your finger or a spoon, very gently tap the mould to release the mix.

Carefully set these bombs aside to dry out. Depending on the humidity level, this could take anywhere from an hour or two, to overnight. You can, of course, run straight up to the bath and use them there and then if the mood takes you!

Once dried, the bombs should last for a few weeks, but I’d recommend keeping them stored in a dry place, ideally in a sealed container, lest they fall victim to humid conditions. Now, you should have plenty to keep you going for a while - so go have a bath and relax.

Troubleshooting:

My bombs are hissing and increasing in size and not drying out.

Unfortunately, too much moisture went in to these bombs and the reaction has started. Really all you can do is run yourself a bath and use them there and then - or discard them, and remember to mist the next bomb / batch with less alcohol or water solution.

My bombs are cracking or falling apart.

Okay, so this isn’t a complete disaster - it just means your bombs were too dry. If this is the case, remember to use a little more mist on the next bomb / batch or you can do what I do and ‘rebrand’ the product. The mix will still work perfectly well when added to the bath, so there’s no need to discard it! Get yourself an air-tight container (Mason jars work well) and spoon the mix into that. You no longer have bath bombs, you have bath fizz! And if anyone asks: that is absolutely what you intended to end up with in the first place! ;) Just shake some of this into the bath when you next have one, and you’ll get the same relaxing feeling, it just won’t involve a bomb fizzing round the bath!

Someone also once asked me, what each ingredient in this recipe is there for. If you’re really that interested, then the gist is this:

Cornflour: it’s a bulking agent and also makes the water ‘fluffy’

Baking Soda & Citric Acid: this is what creates all the fizzy goodness

Cream of Tartar: Helps the bomb float so it doesn’t just sink and fizz away at the bottom

SLSA: This is the ingredient that creates the bubbles (if you’re making a bubble bomb)

Oils / Witch Hazel / Epsom salts: Soothes the skin

Colour: Makes it look pretty

Scent: Makes it smell nice