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#built in soap dish
aprilcarstairs · 1 year
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Bathroom - Craftsman Bathroom
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A large arts and crafts-style corner shower design example with a 3/4-tone medium wood floor, shaker cabinets, white cabinets, a two-piece toilet, green walls, a drop-in sink, and laminate countertops.
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revorocketnails · 2 years
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3/4 Bath Phoenix Mid-sized mountain style 3/4 brown tile and ceramic tile light wood floor and brown floor bathroom photo with shaker cabinets, medium tone wood cabinets, a two-piece toilet, beige walls, an undermount sink, solid surface countertops and brown countertops
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misstel · 2 years
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Transitional Bathroom - 3/4 Bath Mid-sized transitional 3/4 beige tile and ceramic tile slate floor and gray floor bathroom photo with shaker cabinets, gray cabinets, a two-piece toilet, gray walls, an undermount sink and marble countertops
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missdragonica · 2 years
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3/4 Bath in Phoenix Inspiration for a medium-sized rustic bathroom remodel with 3/4 brown tile, ceramic tile, a two-piece toilet, beige walls, an undermount sink, solid surface countertops, and brown countertops.
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zombiemollusk · 2 years
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there was A LOT in my dream last night and i’m not listing everything because that would take forever but i at least wanna say at one point i looked at the moon because i wanted to see “the man in the moon” and it kinda looked like this
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taurusdesign · 2 months
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Judith Kitchen
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Sul sul everyone!
I did it! Finally! It's been quite a ride. In addition to the difficulty of making kitchen, the hot weather is killing me and my computer. It's hot as hell!
When I shared the WIP, I said that "The texturing would end next week." But as you can imagine, it didn't happen that way. The most difficult part of making a kitchen is definitely texturing. Because every part needs to look like a perfect whole. And if there are too many swatches, it becomes more difficult. But I think I did it.
I told there were too many swatches. That's why I divided the kitchen cabinets and counters into three. (As Marble, Wood and Plaster counter tops.) In order to be more easily distinguished in the catalog, they are shown with different swatches as follows.
Marble Top
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Wooden Top
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Plaster Top
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The items included in the set are listed below. (Total of 56 items and Base Game compatible)
Kitchen Counter v1 (3 different tops)
Kitchen Counter v2 (3 different tops)
Kitchen Island v1 (3 different tops)
Kitchen Island v2 (3 different tops)
Cabinets v1 (3 different tops)
Cabinets v2 (3 different tops)
Appliance Cabinets (3 different tops)
Tall Cabinets v1 (3 different tops)
Tall Cabinets v2 (3 different tops)
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Wall Stove Hood
Fridge 1-Tile
Fridge 2-Tiles
Stove
High-oven (Dream Home Decorator Game Pack Required)
Microwave
Built-in Oven*
Cooktop
Dishwasher*
Ceiling Stove Hood (3 heights)
Marble Sink
Metal Sink
Bar Stool
Wide plates
Coffe cups
Water glasses
Oval plates
Medium plates
Saucers
Bowls
Pan
Soup pot
Dish rack
Stock pot
Soap tray
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PUBLIC RELEASE AUGUST 23, 2024
CHECK IT OUT!
I hope you like it!
Love you all! ❤️❤️❤️
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chloeeruby · 1 year
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Bathroom - 3/4 Bath Example of a large arts and crafts 3/4 medium tone wood floor corner shower design with shaker cabinets, white cabinets, a two-piece toilet, green walls, a drop-in sink and laminate countertops
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diejager · 6 months
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if you’re still writing for the monster 141, what about a bay hybrid reader, who is just on the edges on going into hibernation because the base is in a colder area/remote snowy location
I’m gonna assume you mean bear?
Cw: bear hybrid!readr, hibernation, binge eating, hoarding, tell me if I missed any.
Winter was creeping closer and closer by each day, your instinctual need to sleep away the cold calling to you louder than the prior days. There was a bone-deep exhaustion that clung to you, the heaviness that cold weather brought to you was a constant and nagging feeling that urged you deeper in the nest you’d built yourself in your dark room. Your curtains drawn, lights often closed and locks installed, you’d spent the weeks preparing, hoarding soft pillows, thick blankets and clothes from people you were familiar with. 
They were surprised when you brought it up, blinking tiredly and occasionally yawning in the afternoon, stumbling between everyone’s rooms with a small plea on the tip of your tongue. You took whatever they were willing to give you: a blanket from Price and Rudolfo, a shirt from König and Gaz, a jacket from Ghost and Horangi, and a pillow from Soap and Alejandro. As long as it smelled like them, a lingering reminder that you weren’t alone in your humid room, their musk grounding and safety. You wouldn’t be alone.
Price had known you were - like most bears - prone to hibernation, taking between one to three month of your year sleeping away the cold, sinking into your mountain of fabric and sleeping off the coldest months. Your time depended on the year, the warmer it was, the less you slept, and the colder it was, the longer you slept. It might’ve been a bother in people’s eyes - humans - but it was instinctual, a primal part of your brain that still clung to your ancestors who strayed from the path of being normal bears. You couldn’t ignore the pull, the call to sleep, it wasn’t possible for a bear like you, and you were fortunate to have such accommodating teammates.
You grew hungrier, your stomach becoming an endless pit, an abyss that kept taking dish after dish, stocking up in fat and calories that you’d burn during your sleep, keeping you sustained and alive without having to wake up. You ate whatever you that was within your reach, the cold bread, the warm milk, the leftover of two days ago or Soap’s surprisingly good cooking, nothing was safe when you were a big and grumpy and hungry bear near hibernation. Ever supportive and helpful, Soap and Alejandro would jump in to cook for you, hooking Gaz and Rudolfo into being their sous-chef whenever they were free. It was the delicious scent of home cooked and warm meals that brought you to the kitchen, if it wasn’t a call for fixing up someone, it was the smell of good food. 
You were ravenous, gulping down the many, many plates the duo - occasionally quartet - placed on the table, their chests puffed up pridefully at your quick eating, you were practically breathing them in. Your constant eating helped you pack some weight, your skin stretched to accommodate your growing amount of fat that would ultimately burn over the months. And when the day came, you were low on energy, grumpy and easy to anger, your patience running paper thin, bidding your goodbyes and see you soon, wrapping your arms around them and teasing them about missing you during your lockdown. 
You’d sleep through the cold winter months and wake up to a warmer and busier time, to a welcoming and excited team that had spent the better half of winter waiting impatiently for the TF’s medic to wake up.
Taglist: @craxy-person @crowbird @dead-cipher @iwannabealocalcryptid @iizx7y @mxtokko @capricorn-anon @perfectus-in-morte @sae1kie @yeoldedumbslut @bvxygriimes @distracteddragoness @konigsblog @angelcakes-22 @ramadiiiisme @ramblingsofachaoticthinker @im-making-an-effort @love-dove-noora @jinxxangel13 @daisychainsinknots @h0n3y-l3m0n05 @mul-pi @danielle143 @beau-min @makayla-666 @urfavsunkissedleo @notspiders @brokenpieces-72 @luvecarson @petwifed @randominstake @heartelysia @jggykhug09090 @hayleybarnesx @shironasumi @sparky--bunny @bloobewy @call-me-nyxx @sans-chara @cod-z @sweetnanah @aldis-nuts @thigh-o-saur @evolutionarry @kaoyamamegami
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YOU’RE IN THE KITCHEN HUMMING
osamu dazai x reader
you show dazai the beauty in domestic life
inspired by sweet nothing
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when dazai pictured his future, he pictured it short.
a mastermind of people, he knew that that the universe would eventually catch up to him. to his crimes, his wrongdoings, and all of his faults. truth be told, he pictured himself in some sort of prison, bleeding out on a stake of revenge, or simply just gone. he never exactly rejected death in the first place. he accepted it with open arms.
so to think he’d find himself, washing dishes from leftover marinated crab meat and glasses stained with sake while you do the laundry is more of a surprise than anything else. every now and then he looks over his shoulder, watching how you handle the delicate fabric of his brown vest with such care. you always use unscented soap. though you certainly have the money to buy lavender, or bergamot, the two of you enjoyed the simplicity of regular soap. because then, it has the scent of home.
but what exactly does home smell like? for so many years, he couldn’t answer that question. how do you match a scent to something that doesn’t exist? maybe he’d say it smelt like the port mafia hallways, or the smell of old bandages. maybe dazai felt that home smelled like it wasn’t there to stay.
now, home smells like you. it smells like the face mask you make him use because he takes shit care of himself. it smells like your bare shoulder in the morning, the patch of skin he always insists he kisses you awake on. it smells like your laughter, your smile, your beautiful eyes. you were home.
“samu?” you quip, pulling your boyfriend out of his trances. he blinks, his lazily draped arms subconsciously tightening around you.
“yes bella?” he asks, his voice lazy and his brown eyes tired from the day. if he could melt and simply become apart of you, he would. you’re the only part of himself he actually seems to love, anyway.
“were you listening?” you chuckle, knowing that he’s a thinker. he loves you for understanding that, for knowing the signs when he’s lost in his own brain. his nail biting, his wandering eyes, his occasional hums. you know it all, maybe better than dazai knows it about himself. you’d give anything to see what he’s thinking, the beautiful equations in his brain.
his lips curve into a smile, refocusing on you as you laid in his lap all tuckered out. “i’m sorry.”
you sigh, half disappointed but half too-love-struck-to-care. he pulls you flush against his chest, letting you listen to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. oh, how beautiful it sounds.
“i was saying we should go down to that new bakery.” you hum, not minding to recount your experiences for him. “atsushi told me kyouka really likes the crepes there.”
you know he’s listening this time, evident by the way his slender fingers travel through your hair. he loves the silky feel of it, how it may be the softest thing he’s ever felt after years of strangling throats and pulling triggers.
he melts onto that couch with you. the only other sound that can be heard is the occasional drip and drop from the sink. he makes a mental note to check on it in the morning, making sure its not leaking too much.
in his experience, everyone was up to something. no person was just kind for the sake of being kind. and for all his life, people wanted things from dazai. he was used and shaped into a demon when all he’s ever wanted was just to disappear. he insists he’s fine, and that this is just the person he is. he assures everyone that the voices he hears, in and external, don’t bother him at all.
but to you he can admit, that sometimes, he’s just too soft for all of it.
you built a home from the ground up with him. you sheltered and fed a man who never knew what it was like to be loved without condition. all you ever wanted from dazai was nothing. sweet, sweet nothings. and he knew he’d give you everything he is and more in return for that love, for those sweet nothings.
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cheddar-baby · 3 months
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Truly so scary that oil spills are so frequent that an entire industry (dish soap) has built its marketing brand identity off how they can remove crude oil from wildlife. This does not cause any friction with the oil companies or public opinion of those oil companies
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yandere-kokeshi · 7 months
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Yandere Ex Husband Price/Kyle/Johnny head canons !!!!
He still believes you two are together no matter what you are the state says
Or
He keeps delaying signing the divorce papers
Or
He keeps bothering u no matter how much u push him away
Hi pookie!! Hope ur doing well!
— Yandere Ex-husband Johnny being a menace headcanons
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Warnings: yandere behavior, mention of sex and alcohol, much overbearing.
A/N: Decided to go with Johnny ;)! Enjoy <3
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It’s a shame, no? You two were destined to be together. Forever.
He hated being away from you. Not being able to touch you was hell. But, ever since you started acting out, yelling and fighting, breaking out and ignoring him completely, it’s been crushing his heart. Between his missions and your own work, you two barely talked; broken promises turning into broken hearts with wide holes. 
He tried making it up, he really did!! Bought you flowers, dates that ended up with hours’ worth of love and sex, but it was never enough. 
And it made your beloved husband sad. It made me angry. Why can’t you understand you two are meant for each other? 
So after you demanded a divorce, he went along with it. A smirk that widened his blue eyes, nodding as you scoffed at his playful demise.
But, who even listens to those stupid documents? Certainly not, your beloved MacTavish. You were still his, regardless of what the state, or that mind of yours tells you. 
Johnny knows in his gut, in his heart, you’re still in love with him. That one slap you snuck on him was just an accident. That one kick to the balls was just annoyance. The rip of the brand-new underwear he gave you, for Valentine’s Day, was the wrong size. You’re just afraid. The missions he was doing were taking a toll on you; the unsafe feeling crawling up your back. And he was going to protect you to the very end of his line. 
Despite your annoyance, he still picks up your favorite food, coming over to pester you. The knocking, never stopping. The doorbell, which he built, rings your ears. He’ll keep doing it, till he sees his pretty face that he wants to smooch in.
And if you ignore him? Well, guess he’ll have to move in next door! Giving you a smirk when you caught him by the mailbox. So what if you kicked him out? People call him Soap for a reason. 
Finally, when the time is right – Johnny runs over, hand full of items he’ll know you’ll love. 
He knocks, a large hand ringing the doorbell as he yells for your name. He waits, does it again until he smiles at the recognizable stomping of your feet. You’re so cute when you’re angry!   
Of course, as he predicted it, you open the door with an attitude. Nose scrunched. Eyes giving him a glare. And the obvious, “What?”. He chuckles, fixing his jumper as he leans in closer to you. 
He covers a sly excuse that he just wanted to check up on you, one hand holding pretty flowers, your favorite, as the other holds a few beers. He smiles, watching how you leaned against the front door. “Looks like you could use a beer, sweets?”
You roll your eyes, inviting him in. How stupid do you have to be, dolley? 
He still takes every chance to place his hands on your hips, your waist, his lips on your neck. As soon as you two come inside, door locking, Johnny reaches over and seductively grasps your elbow, growling how he needs to talk to you, watching your eyes go wide as you realize Johnny is not your husband. Yet, you’re still so obedient? Why is that? 
He lets you go, chuckling. He’s jus’ joking, peach! But, when you two sit down for the dinner he bought, he knows he’s back into your heart. All quiet. All stiff and being bothered by his presence. It’s cute, isn’t it? 
As dinner finishes, you get up and do dishes; an immediate distance that you need to take. But he chuckles, you think he’d let you off that hook that fast? How sad. 
He passes behind the counter, surprising you with his hands on your hips, as he draws you into him, making sure you feel how much he’s missed you. His fingers deepen into your skin, growling into your ear, “Shoulda kept ya’ all safe, tucked in bed f’me, yeah?” 
Before you know it, it’s months of him not signing the papers. And it’s dawning on you. Irritation digging in your bones, you want to be by yourself! Have a life without Johnny! Get a real job, have real friends, not ones he forces you to have. 
And behind all that glass, Johnny is smirking. Calloused fingers pulling at his hair as he watches you from afar. 
He could wait all day to get the silly idea of divorce out of your head. And you would, just eventually. It’s a waiting game, he’s done it before – enemies and you – so he’ll do it again. 
And maybe, just maybe, he can handle a few more months of “Divorce.” And if you continue going out, getting ready for dates, for only your rightful husband to ruin it, he might need to fuck the business into you, right?
Masterlist || Please consider reblogging and commenting instead of liking. It helps me as a creator!! Stay well!!
© yandere-kokeshi 2024 — Do not copy, modify, edit, repost, or use my works for ASMR readings, tiktoks, or other content.
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For a request:
Maybe a rescue fic with ghost, price, or soap? One where they rescue their non military fem s/o? I know you’ve written some already and they are so good but I EAT THEM UP EVERY TIME and love that trope so much!!!!!!
Hurt/comfort is my drug I swear
I know that’s pretty vague so maybe I’ll think of more eventually but that’s what I’ve got for now.
I love your writing!
- 🧚🏻‍♀️🧚🏻‍♀️
None Lacking Sins
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Pairing: Johnny 'Soap' MacTavish x F!Reader
Synopsis: It started with the incident at the grocery store and then built to the hidden gun in the nightstand and a quick, frantic, call to your boyfriend.
Word Count: 7.4k
Warnings: Implied stalking, violence & blood, angst, protective Soap, suggestive language and conversations, implications of wanting a kid, vulgar language, fluffy banter, hurt/comfort, canon typical actions, edited in the middle of the night
A/N: I've been in a Soap mood lately, tbh. I think I'm going to flip-flop uploads for my Gaz series and Requests too...anyways. Enjoy, anon! You can never go wrong with a rescue fic!
*I do not give others permission to translate and/or re-publish my works on this or any other platform*  
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You called him for the first time when you were at the store, picking out dinner and asking what he wanted for a welcome home meal.
“Well,” his sly voice made you roll your eyes, but a smile still blossomed over your lips. “If you want me to be rash, Bonnie, I’d say that I wouldn't mind a good bite out of your–”
“Johnny, you finish that sentence, you’re not going to get anything besides butter on toast. Give me a recipe before it gets dark out.” Veiled glee was obvious from your tone, and the heat on your face could all but be heard over the line. Two months apart had made you both eager to be in each other's presence. 
Picking up a box of pasta, you flip it over and check the price, sticking to your budget and tilting the phone parallel to your chin. A deep chuckle meets your ears, and your chest feels light as it pierces your lungs. 
Your boyfriend was off in Australia this deployment—he’d been complaining about the heat nonstop on those few and far between video calls the two of you shared. While it was a step-up to know where exactly Johnny was this go around, the prospect of his job still made you incredibly nervous. There was never a time you could remember when he came home without a new cut or scar; bruises were all but guaranteed. 
Sucking down a soothing breath, you place the pasta into your cart and fix the phone’s position. The Scot was coming home in a day or so, you wanted to make him feel at home again. Destress.
You’ll see him before you know it. There’s no need to worry.
“Bit snappy, then, eh? Oh, alright.” The man huffs good-heartedly, and you hear the springs of those thin barracks-bed mattresses as his large frame shifts. Johnny lets off a soft sigh before continuing. You listen intently, leaning onto the handlebar ahead of you. “What about a nice plate ‘O that one you always make—hell—the…the one with the Pollock and cabbage.”
You blink through a laugh, shaking your head and pushing yourself off to go find the needed ingredients. The dish wasn’t easy to make, in fact, it took a helluva lot of time, but you didn’t mind in the slightest when it came to cooking for Johnny. He deserved it. 
“Hey, now,” He teases, smirking to himself, “What’s so funny over there, Dearie? You makin’ fun of me?”
“I would never dream of it, oh great and wondrous, Mr. MacTavish!” You huff, fake serious, as you place a box of cookies into the cart and pass a few strangers who raise an eyebrow at your conversation. A man passes by with a blue cap on, and you swerve the cart to move around him while tossing back a frown. You soon continue on like nothing happened, pulling back the sense of security from the man over the line. “Do you want mashed potatoes with that as well? Wine?”
Johnny groans, “Hey, you’re the one that asked me!” 
Divulging into giggles, you make your way around the store and stock up, holding a light conversation about how he and the rest of the boys were doing. 
“Ghost told me to let you know he appreciated the book you lent him, said he’d get it back to ya as soon as he’s able.” The Scot comments, and a hum makes its way from you as you head to the self-checkout. 
“Well, that’s good. I said he would like it – the bastard’s so tight-lipped about what he enjoys it was hard to nail-down a genre.” A chortle sounds off when you gather the chilled pollock and scan it; the phone was held against your shoulder to your ear. “High Fantasy for the win, I guess.” 
“I should get the man to read ‘The Way of Kings’ next time—form a little book club, y’know? Get all the boys in on it like some old ladies.” It was adorable how cute Johnny sounded, like a kid on Christmas. “Stemin’ Jesus, could you picture that, Bonnie?”
“I’d pay to see you pitch that, Dear.” A cheeky tone leaks through. “Price would laugh straight into your face.” 
“Please, the old man doesn’t know how to laugh….He’d just puff cigar smoke in my face and tell me to fuck off.” 
“As I said—I’d pay to see it.” Your boyfriend grumbles under his breath as you place the paper bags into your cart, the contents heavy, and grab your receipt with quick fingers. “Gaz would definitely be in for it, though.”
“I don’t doubt that. Anything beats playing cards for weeks straight, aye?” Your hand can finally grip the phone once more, and you sigh contently as the strained position of your neck finally rights itself. 
You’re about to answer but slow your pace with a scrunched look of confusion as you exit. 
Passing through the front doors, you suddenly get a strange sensation in the back of your mind to turn around. The hairs along your arms stand up as a breeze passes the steadily chilling dark sky, but the way the shiver ran down your spine wasn’t due to cold. Lips thinning, you spare a glance over your shoulder and look along the brightly lit grocery store as its windows leave cascading rays of light over the sun-bleached concrete. The black asphalt of the parking lot is hard under your feet.
There are a handful of other patrons at the checkouts—mothers with children and others buying quick meals for dinner—but none are out of the ordinary. 
You huff and roll your shoulders.
Maybe the day’s just getting to me.
“Bonnie,” Johnny’s slightly concerned voice brings you blinking back, turning your head back to the sparsely lit parking lot and realizing you had stopped walking completely. Your hand was sweaty like you’d just run somewhere. Fixing your hold on the device, your boyfriend continues, “...Everything alright? You’ve gone all quiet over there.”
“Yeah, sorry,” you laugh dismissively, trudging forward to your car, “I just got the weirdest feeling right outside the grocery store.” 
The cart makes a loud rumbling sound as it goes over loose rocks and the bumpy texture of the asphalt, the metal rattling loudly so you have to strain your ears to hear Johnny’s next words. 
“What kind of feeling?” His drowned-out voice was so serious that it shocked you—you’d only ever heard him use a tone like this when he had briefly talked about nightmares that had woken him up in your shared bed. 
The Scot’s words were monotone, slow, and even if the sound of the cart’s wheels was raging all around you and making your skull rattle, you’d still swear you would identify that tone over a hurricane. It made your gut churn. 
“Really, it’s probably nothing,” you play off with a tense shrug he can’t see, coming to a stop at your car and reaching into your pocket for your keys. “I just got a chill.” 
Your eyes look around before you open the trunk, biting into your lip at the long shadows that the tall street lamps give off. Licking over your teeth, you bink dismissively and shake your head, unlocking the vehicle and huffing as you begin loading in your purchases. 
“Anyways,” you try to ignore the hard build of your spine or the way your eyes travel back to the brightly lit store. There wasn’t anyone out here but you and the dead forms of cars, trees off in the distance, and far-off lights of other buildings. You swallow and clear your throat. “I was thinking about getting us a dog.” 
“You’re not gettin’ out of this that—wait, did you say dog?” Across the world in a shitty bed, Johnny’s once concerned eyes widen, jaw going slack. “No way in Christ’s Hell, Dearie.”
“Oh, come on!” You groan, placing the second to last bag into the car and tuning your back to the street, throwing out your hand. “It doesn’t have to be a big dog—just one I can go on walks with and keep me company. I know you have a bad past with them, Love, but I just want someone to help not make the house so empty when you’re gone.” 
Your voice slides off near the end of the sentence, and you try not to sound so sullen. Johnny frowns as he stares into the far wall of the barracks over the heads of sleeping men, itching at the back of his neck. It was no secret that the Scot wasn’t particularly fond of canines—his encounters with them were almost never pleasant unless he knew the handler. 
But…
“I’ll think it over, eh, Bonnie?” He relents, sighing, and he thinks he hears snickers from a dark form in the distant corner. The Sergeant glares over at it and continues with a pang of internal guilt about how lonely you must feel most of the time. “Promise…but you’re more likely to get a cat dressed in a suit than a mangy mutt anytime soon.” 
You laugh at the attempt of a lighthearted joke, closing the trunk with a roll of your eyes. A breeze goes by and your arms erupt into shivers, clothes not enough to keep out the chill. 
“I’ll take it.” 
“Hm, you know,” Johnny smirks, rubbing at the sleep in his eyes and grunting out huskily, “there’s another way to make sure the house won’t be all quiet when I’m gone.”
“Keep it in your pants, MacTavish. You’re not even here yet.” Smiling through the heat of your cheeks, the skin of your cheeks glows; your body rolls with heat. “Save it for tomorrow.”
“What, am I gettin’ you all worked up over there?” He hums, and you grab your cart, pushing it into one of the specific areas where someone would grab it in the morning. “‘Cause I have no problem with waitin’, Dearie, all the more perfect when I get to be with ya.’”
“You wish, handsome.” Walking back to the slight rumbling of your car, you speak through tilted lips and completely miss the form walking up beside you. “I think that—”
“Excuse me?” 
Yelping, you nearly drop your phone to the floor as it slips out of your startled grip; heart jerking at the sudden intrusion into an intimate conversation. Swiftly turning around you spot the same man as before—the one with the blue cap that had passed by quite rudely in the store. His strong face looks sheepish.
Johnny quickly calls your name through the line, and you let off a reassurance before tilting the device down.
“Holy hell, man, give a girl a warning next time, yeah?” Chuckling weakly to push back tension and the twisting of your intestines, you notice the stranger’s tall frame is covered in a heavy jacket. “Is there something I can help you with?”
“Yeah, actually,” He’s not outwardly alarming to look at, the man, with his loose body gestures and controlled tone. “Sorry, but I was just wondering if you could lend me a hand. I found a kitten under a van back there,” he points, and you look over to the far corner of the parking lot. Sure enough, there was a large van surrounded by two black cars. Your eyes narrow on the scene, already getting a prickly feeling. “Do you have any food that might bring it out? Or maybe you’d be willing to reach under and grab the little bastard?” 
The stranger laughs and continues with a jerking of his shoulders. You watch every movement with an upticking pulse, fingers tight over the phone as Johnny listens with growing worry. 
The Sergeant's dark eyebrows pull tight, and he stands like he could run out the door to you; jaw tight and muscles wound.
“Put me on speaker.” You decline silently. Better not to get a hotheaded and protective Scot involved when he was thousands of miles away.
“Sorry,” Clearing your throat, you take a step back, attempting a friendly smile. “I have to get home to my husband.” It wasn’t the first time you’d had to use the spouse card to get away from creeps, and it won't be the last. Worked better than just the boyfriend title, honestly. And there was something about this man’s eyes that didn’t sit right with you. “Work night and all, you understand?”
“He left yet?” Johnny asks, gruff as his accent gets stronger. “Else I’m callin’ the store and sending security out to you.” 
“It shouldn’t take a long time,” the man begs and you take another slow step back to the car door, pupils going tiny. Breaths shallow. “You’ll be back to your…husband, in a few minutes. I’d hate to leave the poor guy all alone.” 
“Sorry.” You say again, firmer. “No.” 
Not wasting any time, you open the car and jump inside, wrenching it closed once more and pressing the lock. Breathing heavily, you stick the keys into the ignition, missing a couple of times, and look into the side mirrors to spy on the tall shadow that hovers like a plague. 
“Sweetheart? Hey?” Johnny calls out your name as you force the car to start driving away, face tight and limbs shaking. “Hey, are you alright?” 
The man has half the sense to wake up Price, but with the stirring bodies around him, there’s half a chance the Captain already knows something’s off. Johnny hadn’t bothered to check his noise level when the uncomfortableness seeped from you over to him. What kind of a man approaches a woman near dark and asks a question like that? The action didn’t sit right with the Scot. 
Johnny’s body hums with energy—volatile rage keeps his heart in a tight fist with a deep seething hatred of not being with you to help force back the freaks in person. He wasn’t above getting into someone's face if the situation called for it; after a couple of outings to less-than-nice pubs, all it took was a few nervous glances from you nowadays for him to create a barrier out of his own flesh.
“I’m okay,” you whisper to him, biting at your lips and peeling back flesh. “It’s all good. I-I’m on the road already.” 
A great weight falls from the man in the form of a sigh. He slowly sits back down on the mattress, lips thinning and slightly shaking his head. His free hand comes up to rub over his cheek. 
“Good. That’s good…” He snaps out of his concerned stupor quickly, but the fast beating of his heart does anything but slow. “You’re okay.” 
It wasn’t worded as a question, maybe more of a reassurance, but it helped you immensely. Your tension lessened at the comforting sound of Scottish drawl and deep, silver, voice. But you wanted him to wrap his arms around you; gaze into those cerulean orbs.
Tomorrow.
“Keep on the line until I get home?” You ask feebly, not able to resist looking in the mirrors as you turn out of the parking lot. 
The blue-capped stranger was still standing there, and one of the black cars in the far corner had turned its headlights on. A deep dread overtakes your ribs like you’d just gotten out of something very, very, bad. A sense of a lingering morality stays in between your ribs.
“‘Course. Wouldn’t be doin’ anything else, Bonnie.” Johnny utters, glaring at the floor. “I’ll be ‘ere the whole time.”
It wasn’t fair that he was unable to be there with you—never before had the constraints from his job hit him full strength in the chest like this. If he can’t protect the ones he loves back on the home field, then what was the point of the Task Force in the first place? 
By the time you get home after taking the fastest route, you quickly gather everything from the back and shuffle inside, pulse still racing. You lock the door behind you and take a deep breath, closing your eyes. 
Johnny’s soft breath over the call was like a lullaby, right in your ear as if he was beside you in bed. Oh, you missed his soft snores more than anything. Your gaze goes glossy, but the tears are held back stubbornly. 
As if sensing your turmoil, your boyfriend speaks lowly. 
“Y’know, I bet the rest of the boys would really love it if we kept ‘em over for a drink and a bite when we all get back. I can whip up something quick on the grill and you can take a breather, eh?” He speaks so softly it almost makes the tears worse, heart palpitating. 
You wetly laugh and place a hand to your mouth, standing in the dark foyer with groceries on the floor and a primal fear slowly leaving you. The familiar scents of charcoal and birch wood from the Scots hair product are stuck into the very walls of this shared dwelling, along with the scuffs on the floor from play-wrestling during movies; a light that needed to be replaced due to Johnny accidentally running straight into it at two am. He had thought an intruder had broken in, but it was just a bird that had snuck in through an open window.
The signs of a well-lived and loved home. 
“But you wanted pollock,” you grumble with a hidden smile and burning ears, pushing the tip of your shoe into the front rug.
Johnny beams and goes to lie back down, putting a hand behind his head against the pillow.
“Well, now I’m makin’ burgers. Guess you’re just going to have to sit back and watch my fabulous arse from the porch, yeah, Dearie? Don’t burn a hole into them, now, they’re the only pair I’ve got, and I know how much you like ‘em.”
“Shut up.” 
“I’ll even wear that apron you got me—what was it you said it did,” the cheeky Scot smirks, all teeth and crinkled eyelids, and hears your complaints get louder as your mind flies away from what had happened almost immediately. “Made me look like I should be in a porno? Hell, if you were in it with me, I’d not complain ‘bout it. Steamin’ Jesus, I’d let you do horrible things to me, Dearie.”
From somewhere in the barracks a low groan echoes out and Johnny snaps his hand down to stifle his loud laughter as you bark at him. 
“MacTavish!” 
Great bouts of laughter leave everyone glaring from atop pillows and from over fingers stuffed into ears; some even get up and gather blankets, leaving the barracks room entirely.
In your foyer, your body blazes with heat like you’d been set on fire, a hand placed over your eyes and a treacherous grin on your mouth. 
“Keep your voice down, you absolute arsepiece!”
“Aye—! That’s what I’m tryin’ to tell ya!” 
“Johnny!”
The second time you called him was out of pure curiosity, only a few hours before your lover was scheduled to come home and cook for you and his Task Force. Around six o'clock. 
“When was our postbox all scratched up?” Your thumb runs over the black numbers of the sequence, blinking with wrinkled skin as you take a glance at the neighbors’ and frown. No one else's was like that. “I thought you said you compromised with the local kids and would give them money for sweets so they would stop messing with our stuff?” 
“Little fiends were sucking me dry!” Johnny huffs, “No way the devils would pass up more sugar and do something like that. What’s it look like, then? A few stray rocks manage to dent it?”
Your lips release a sigh and you pick up your mail with an annoyed grunt, closing and locking the cubby as you reply. “No way, it looks like someone took a knife to it.” Clicking your tongue, you shake your head. “God, things have just been going wrong lately.”
Shuffling his feet over the tarmac and hearing the plane engines die down behind him, Johnny takes a glance back. Price was standing at the top of the C17 arms crossed and head tilted—the Scot could imagine the raised eyebrow almost immediately. 
He grimaces and holds up a finger, walking a few more steps away as Gaz leaves the hull with his bags slung over his shoulders. 
“I can’t talk any longer, Bonnie, Price’ll wring me for not helpin’ unload the gear. He’s damn near skinnin’ me already.”
You chuckle, “Tell him I said ‘hello’ and not to damage the face.” 
“Oh, you’re a horror, you are, Dearie.” 
Quick declarations of love and see you soons were exchanged before the connection was cut, and your feet carried you back into the house. Your phone and the mail went to sit on the tiny hallways table, shoes tossed onto the plastic mat sitting on the floor with a small thump. 
Sighing, you rub over your eyes, thinking over if it was worth calling the post office or just trying to fix the scratches yourself. 
“I think we have some paint in the garage…” You trail off. 
Ultimately, you just pushed that to the back burner. Johnny was coming home. Your lips peeled into a large smile, and you’re rushing off to get into a nice outfit for the rest of Task Force who was coming a bit later than your boyfriend. Thoughts of finally being able to be picked up by your boyfriend's strong arms were all-consuming, being held into a broad chest and digging your nails to the dip of his spine. 
Just being able to be around the mohawked-man was a blessing that you’d never take for granted. 
You settled on a nice top and casual pants—you’d met the others before, so there was no need to go overboard. Smoothing your clothes down, you enter the living room and go to open the curtains, letting the light of the interior spread to the small lawn and the street. Humming under your breath, the vehicle outside doesn’t catch your attention immediately; the black metal is just another parked entity sitting still. 
When you do pause, your curtains half-opened, the delayed shock makes you lose precious time as you stare slack-jawed at one of the twin cars from yesterday at the parking lot. Your fingers clench into the fabric in a sudden moment of frozen shock. As if a mythical creature had just run past your field of view, the parting of your lips is instinctual before the widening of your eyes. 
A still second passes before you’re sprinting to the front door—locking it and snatching your phone. Heart pounding, you make a dash to the bedroom, dialing Johnny with fear-tight pupils. 
He had told you if there was ever an emergency to call him right away, he’d get there faster than any police officer; for the record, you believed that wholeheartedly. Johnny was more loyal than a dog in a pack, once someone raised the alarm the Sergeant was locked in. 
Rushing into the bedroom, you trip over the tossed covers but right yourself as the dialing tone sounds out, heavy breathing making your lungs hurt. You open the nightstand table and dig under a collection of books, hand meeting the smooth metal of an M9 pistol. 
Putting the phone on speaker, you throw it onto the mattress.
Legally, you shouldn’t even have this—while Johnny had been teaching you to shoot, you didn’t have a license for it yet. But he’d insisted on leaving you behind with something to defend yourself with.
The confused voice of your lover sounds over the open space. “Jesus, Bonnie, you miss me that much? It cannae ‘ave been more than ten minutes—”
“The car from yesterday is outside the house.” You throw the books to the floor and hear them make a clatter just as you pull out a box of ammunition. Taking out the gun’s magazine, you load bullets with a violently shaking hand. Some hit the ground with a metallic ping, but you pay little attention, just blinking back anxious tears and a harsh focus on the sounds of the front door handle being jimmied.
“I…what?” Johnny’s voice gets heavier, demanding with a snarl trapped in the back of his throat. 
Standing stationary in the doorway Base—about a twenty-minute drive from home, the man’s heart suddenly jumps in his breast. Did he hear you right? Behind him, Ghost slows to a stop at the now blocked opening, watching with narrowed eyes; a large rifle slung over his shoulder and a carry bag in his arm. Johnny’s shoulders wind tight, feet parted as he suddenly turns on his heels and takes off back the way he came in, the phone still at his ear where the Lieutenant knew you were on the call.
“What the fuck?!” Ghost’s skeletal head follows after and pointedly notices the Scots lack of care for how his bags hit the ground but keeps the pistol holstered at his thigh and the combat knife strapped to his upper shoulder. 
“Johnny?” He calls out, but only the wind answers him. “The hell are you off to?!” The gargantuan man sends a glance over to Price who was watching just as intently, lids narrowed. Gaz cleared his throat.
“....Shouldn’t we follow him? Sounds pretty serious.” 
Price sighs, taking a moment to watch Soap sprint to the main building and shove past other soldiers and staff. He grunts.
“Move light.” 
The phone call was filled with heavy breathing and hurried orders. 
Your boyfriend was running you down the basics of firing at a moving target as the sound of pounding at the front door became more hurried.
“It’s not like a stationary target—when someone’s runnin’ at ya, they're gonna be moving quick and you’re not going to be able to fire if you don’t mean it!” 
“Okay, okay,” you mutter with a shaky inhalation, loading the M9’s magazine and clicking off the safety. “What the hell do they want with me?” The whispered question is more for you than it is for anyone else, but the answer from the sprinting Scot startles you. 
At that exact moment, the pounding of a fist stops completely.
“It doesn’t matter. You’re gonna fire at the first bastard that comes down that hallway. We’ll ask the questions later.” You hear a car door opening and a yell from Johnny’s side, soon the clammer of grunting breaths an exclamation of ‘hurry the fuck up!’
“I—”
“If you need to, leave through the window and go to the neighbors. Take cover in the foliage and slip away to the back alley.” Johnny never spoke like this to you—clipped and deathly serious. But now that you think about it, as you stay frozen and barricaded in the bedroom, if he spoke any differently you’d probably break down. “Do you copy?”
This was Sergeant MacTavish, and damn him if anything came between that man and the people he cared about. 
He barks your name, “Do you copy?!” 
“Yeah,” the gun shakes in your grip, but nonetheless you hold it at your hip and turn your eyes to the window. It would be easier to leave, you think. You’re not trained for this! “I–I think I’m going to—”
The front door’s window is broken with a shattering of glass. You rush to the phone and turn off the speaker, afraid that the sound would immediately tell these people where you were. Loud shouts flow into the foyer and spread like venom under the crack of the thin barrier separating you and the intruders. 
“Spread out and find her!”
“Yes, Sir!” 
Sir? You ask, eyes snapping this way and that as Johnny is dead silent on the other side. You think you hear the slam of a foot to the pedal, but you can’t be sure. Fuck, there was so much going on, you didn’t know what to do.
“Screw this, I’m going out the fucking window.” You gasp out, lungs tight and skin sweaty, you turn on the safety on the gun and stuff it into your belt. 
One-handed, you unlatch the lock and strain your ears, hearing feet getting closer. Grunting, you shove the heavy frame up and try to stop the ringing in your ears. Whoever these people in your house were—they were professionals. They had patience; studied your intellect with the trick in the parking lot and followed you home so they could mark your postbox number as a reminder of your address. What the hell was happening? 
Just as you’re about to make the small drop into the flower bed, a creak echoes from behind the bedroom door. You freeze in place, one foot dangling into the backyard. 
Breathing slowly, your eyes lock to the deep shadow that spreads like two distorted poles as the large feet face the very place you’d holed up. As delicately as you’re able with an award-setting tremor in your gut, you place the phone down onto the window sill; Johnny’s loud and worried voice dims as all attention moves to self-preservation. You’re just about to reach for your gun when the door busts off its hinges. 
Starling, and before your hands can find purchase, you’re tumbling backward—out of the house entirely with a stifled shout of alarm. Slamming to the ground and crushing flowers in the process, you have no time to think about the pain going up your spine or at the base of your skull before you’re scrambling for the M9. 
Just as someone peeks out from the window, face covered and holding an assault rifle, you’re firing three shots in rapid succession as you don’t even remember flicking off the safety. 
Two shots miss entirely, but on the last and final press of the trigger, as your arms catch the recoil, it connects. 
A comment is cut short as blood explodes in a great wave of velocity, coating the house upwards almost to the shingled roof. The body slumps, weight bringing it down to hang limp over the frame.
Wide-eyed, you still hold the shaking gun in the air, muzzle smoking, breathing fast through your mouth. Had you just…
Your stomach bunched, acid traveling up your throat to pool under your tongue. Perhaps you would have thrown up at that moment, the setting reality that you’d just shot someone in the head like an anvil in your pounding skull. But the barking voices from inside the house snap you back. 
Gasping down the breaths you realized you hadn’t been taking, your wobbly feet dart to shove you up like a newborn deer as sprinting bodies close in on the porch’s sliding door. God, you could only imagine what Johnny was thinking. 
Bolting out of your backyard fence, you remember your lover’s orders and run as fast as you’re able to the neighbor's open yard, using the darkening sky to help cover you. Cursing under your breath and thinking over all of the ways this should have already gone wrong, you wipe at the tears cascading down your cheeks. 
Don’t think about it—just get away.
It wasn’t long before you were down the alleyway, feet weak and lungs burning. There was a stickiness to the back of your scalp, blood, undoubtedly, from an injury caused by the fall.
It’s a damn miracle I didn’t break anything. 
What would you have done then? Just let those people take or kill you? You shiver at the idea and force yourself to go faster. Darting around a corner, your feet skid to a quick halt. 
The barrel of a gun was pointed directly at your face. 
“Had a feeling you’d be slippery.” It was the voice of the man from the parking lot—the man with the blue cap. Your face jerks to an imitation of confined horror and unease at the same eyes boring into you. He was dressed in gear like the rest of the men now exiting your house to hunt you down. The stranger shifts his feet and you flinch. “Drop the gun, Sweetheart.” 
“Who the fuck are you?” You find your voice, hissing out. The pistol clatters to the floor as it slips from your grip and you hate how you flinch at the sound. 
“Your boyfriend and his buddies are hard to track down.” Blue Cap huffs, and the tall stature of the man makes you incredibly nervous. Backing up a step instinctually, he follows and smirks. “But I figured the best way to meet him was to find his little bird first—he’d come right to me. Cliche, I know, but you can’t fault me. Works every time.” 
What did this guy want with your Johnny? Gritting your teeth, your fingers shake at your sides, hips tense and ready to run.
“He’ll kill you.” You level, not keen to show this man how disgusting you felt being near him. 
He shuffles up next to you, grabbing the meat of your arm. Trying to jerk away, the barrel of his weapon is shoved into your ribs; gasping, your body goes rigid.
If your heart goes any faster, it’ll break.
“Not if I threaten to kill you first.” Forcing you forward, you glare and feel the urge to spit in the man’s face. “C’mon, hun.”
“Don’t fucking call me that, freak.” 
“Ooo…fangs. Can’t be surprised, you did shoot one of my men, after all. Not a bad trigger finger, but you do need decent work on your accuracy if you wanna make anything out of it.” Your eyebrows pull in as you’re corralled back out of the alleyway, barrel bruising your skin and blood dripping down your neck. The man’s grip hurts as a strangled whimper falls from your bitten lips. 
Feet scraping over concrete, you’re brought out into the street as neighbors peak out of windows with drawn curtains; phones to their faces. Did these intruders not care about the police? If anything, that made you sweat more. 
“Ride’s waiting.” 
“I’m not getting into that.” Grunting, your eyes are stuck on the black void of the car parked in the street. A menagerie of other armed men stands all over. “Hell no—you can just shoot me now if that’s the case.”
“Don’t tempt me, I can still go after the Sergeant’s dear old mom,” your lungs chill as the man chuckles to himself, looking down at you through dark lashes. “He has a cousin, too, am I right?” 
Rageful tears spark behind your lids as you blink. 
No way it was going to go like this. Where’s Johnny? 
The gun was taken from your ribs as you’re shoved forward. 
“Get in. Now. We’re already behind schedule.” You stare into the interior and clench your fists, lips quivering but jaw clenched. Your Lover’s voice comes to you, sure of himself and laced with stubbornness. 
If you’re ever in trouble, you wait for me, Dearie. I’ll be there ‘fore you know it, ready to defend your honor like the knight in shinin’ armor I am, eh? Why are you laughing…?
Turning back around with every ounce of courage you can muster, you splay your feet and cross your arms.
“No.” The gun is raised to your head, and you want to flinch back in terror but restrain yourself. 
“Get in.” 
“No.” How your voice wasn’t breaking was a question in and of itself, but Johnny had always said you were stubborn like him. Best time to prove him right was with a barrel to your face, apparently.
The stranger’s eyes light with anger, hands clenching over the body of the weapon as the rest of his men stare on in shock. A growl meets air.
“I’m not asking for a third time, Sweetheart—” One loud boom later and you’re ducking down with your hands over your head, ears ringing and body unsteady; a great weight hits the ground right next to you.
The sound of gunfire rattles the world all around the once quiet street, and you think that you and your Lover will have to move after this. No way the neighbors could let all this slide. Looking up, your eyes jump from the corpse spasming near you to the running men, chaos breeding in the lines between shouts and dropping bodies. 
A hand latches into your waist, and you’re being lifted into strong arms moments later. Squealing, your head snaps to the size and meets cerulean blue inlaid in a strong brow line. 
“I’ve got ya.” Your body loses all tension at the accent that you would know anywhere, even in death, a strong grip picking you up and keeping you close to his broad chest. 
Johnny carries you away in the midst of battle as the rest of the 141 get involved, making quick work of the remaining men. Breathing in his scent, you force your face under his chin, feeling the stubble scrape as your fingers dig into flesh. 
He’s here. He’s—he’s right here.
“Don’t worry, Dearie, I’m right here. It’s nearly over, now.” You try to bring him closer as he takes cover behind a wall, pressing his shoulders against the grating stone as he shields you closer to him. Sliding down to the ground.
His eyes snap back and forth, heart rapid. God, he was nearly too late. Johnny presses his nose into your hair as he breathes deeply, watching bodies fall and feeling you shake. Feeling you shiver; now finally able to let everything sink in. 
“Shh,” the Scot mutters, pressing you closer as you whisper his name in a hoarse breath. “You’re alright. I’m ‘ere, Bonnie, I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.” His hands filter over your skin, checking for injuries and feeling over growing bumps from under-the-skin abrasions.
His teeth clench together in hate, hotheadedness taking over for a moment as part of him wants to rush out and pick a few of these bastards off himself. But it’s just not that simple. 
Looking out into the street with serious eyes, the radio attached to his vest sounds off as the last of the firefight ends almost as quickly as it began. 
“Clear.” It was Price. “How is she?” 
Johnny sighs, looking down at you in his hold as he whispers comforting words in quick succession.
“Shaken, but alright…” The reply is muttered as you sniffle, your fingers going to wipe away tears. “She’s—she’s alright.”
Johnny beats you to it as he tries to calm down, large digits tilting your head to the side and studying intently as he swipes them away with a firm thumb and a careful frown. 
“Johnny—” Your eyes stay locked on him as the Scot gets rid of any trace of fear or sadness, calluses burning your skin just as they always did. His gaze flickers to you; lips pulling tight. None of you choose to move, too content with being this close to one another and safe, even if the situation was serious. “I…”
You trail, not even knowing what to say as the wetness of your eyes blurs your vision, body hot, and the back of your skull aching. Your hands go to cup his cheeks. It’s all the words he needs. 
Eyes soft, the Sergeant attempts a weak and worried smile. “I’m so proud of you, Dearie, y’know that? So damn proud.” Your lips quirk, a strained laugh echoing out. A finger pokes the side of your nose. “Hey, I’m serious now. Stop your foolin'.” 
Johnny’s fingers run deep circles into your temples as you trace the lines of his cheeks. 
“Shut up.” You huff, straining against a wide smile. It was easy to push all of this behind you when you were looking at him. He made everything better.
“Hm,” He moves forward and presses his lips to your forehead, quickly going to lay kisses all over your face until giggles spill out from the alleyway to the waiting three. 
Gaz smiles to himself, Price grunts lightly, and Ghost gazes off. 
“I’ll just have to prove to my Bonnie Little Lady that she’s a prime piece of work, then, eh? Smarter; more quick than a fuckin’ recon team,” he leans close and you have to try and shove him away playfully when he starts to squish you against him. Your laughter grows as his scratchy chin nuzzles your neck. “And don’t mind me sayin’ now, but a proper fine pair of tits and arse to go along with the brains of ya, Dearie.”
“MacTavish!” you squeal, “I should call your mother up and explain how you speak to me—that’s vulgar! I know for a fact she didn’t teach you that.”
“Teach me? Oh, now, then, no one could teach me a thing when you’re around. Cannae think a bit; better off talkin’ to a pile of stone.” You punch his solid chest and laugh so hard your face hurts, breath fanning against his neck as his roaming praise continues as if his mind was a bag of water punctured by a knife. “I’m always thinkin’ ‘bout you, my Little Bonnie.” 
The last sentence is quietly muttered into your temple, a kiss pressed tight. He pulls back slightly and feels at the dried blood on your locks, fingers separating to find the scalp. Johnny’s chest rattles in a sigh, hand shaking slightly when he sees it. 
He’d also seen the body on the window sill, though he knows not to mention it.
Christ, you’d had to kill someone. 
The prospect of taking a life was easy to the Scot—some days he felt like he had been born and bred to do just that. It became simple. Elementary. Like his mother could memorize a recipe, he could memorize the position of arteries; what shot to take at that instant, and which to wait on based only on past missions that resonated like past lives.
But for you…
Oh, it was never supposed to happen to you.
“Are you alright?” Johnny breaths, humor gone and left with guilt. 
He feels your lips on his raging pulse and lets his eyes close, content to feel you move against him as your head remains in his neck. Shifting his body into a more comfortable position, he cages you in protectively. Never again would he allow this to happen.
“I shot someone.” The man’s lips quivered, heart hurting at the blatant shock in your voice. It hadn’t hit you yet, and, hell, Johnny still remembered his first kill like it was yesterday. It wouldn’t be good when all this calmed down. He’d thrown up for two days straight, himself.
“Aye.” He breathes.
“His blood’s all over the house.”
“It is.”
“Is…is that,” you’re shivering, so he massages your spine soothingly until you find the words. “Is that a good thing?” 
He should say no, tell you that the situation that you’d been put in was never supposed to happen and it was just an unfortunate reality. Death wasn’t a good thing, per se. But the man had broken into your shared home—busted down the bedroom door with the intent of using you as a bargaining chip to get to him. So, to the Scot, the answer is clear.
No one messed with his family and lived.
“Yes.” Taking down the air of a dusty alleyway as sirens wail a street over, you weren't surprised that your boyfriend had managed to get to your home far faster than the police could. He said he always would, didn’t he? 
The bills for the speeding tickets and the running of red lights were going to be atrocious.
“Okay.” Your answer is muttered as you peel back, pressing a kiss to the corner of Johnny’s lips. You believed him. Always would. “Thank you.” 
“Don’t thank me.” His bright teeth show off a smile as your mirror. He kisses you heavily on the lips. Whispers against your lips, a promise. A vow. “As long as you put up with me, I’ll always keep you safe.”
“Soap,” Price yells, snapping the two of you out of it. “Get on with it!” 
The Scot raises a shocked brow and smirks down at you as you tilt your head and listen in happy confusion. 
“Y’know, those shots weren't half bad back there. ‘Specially after takin’ a tumble into the flowers.” Your expression freezes in denial as you’re lifted bridal style into the air. Speaking over the calls of police and firemen as they come to the scene, your voice monotones as your legs swing.
“...I missed two out of the three, you dork. That’s failing.” Johnny gapes in mock surprise and you refrain from snorting at the boyish glint in his eyes.
“Jesus, is it really? Hell, you’ll be comin’ for my job in no time, won’t ya? That’s one better than me!” 
You kiss him and feel the grunt through your lips.
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aliensupastar · 1 year
Text
shouldn’t feel like a crime
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Rating: Mature
Pairing: Carmy Berzatto/GN!Reader
Word Count: 2.1k
Summary: You finally try Carmy’s cooking. Follow-up to “not wrong, but not right”
Part I Part III
Warnings: minor angst, comfort, fluff, depiction of an eating disorder, food and eating, healing?
A/N: first off, thank you all so much for the love on the first part! i wrote it as a comfort during a difficult time and it was so nice to see people enjoy it. i didn’t intend on writing more for it, but a few people asked for it and i finally got an idea for a follow-up! as a disclaimer, i wrote most of this before season 2 came out and edited it afterwards, but there are no spoilers. gif by emziess <3
Carmy is a good boss. You know this, you’ve known it for months. His sometimes-abrasive idiolect aside, he runs the restaurant like he cares about every brick that built it, every burner the crew uses to make each dish, every ticket that comes through that god-forsaken machine on the expo station. It makes any screaming match easily forgivable, and any nightmare lunch rush endurable. 
What you didn’t know was that Carmy could also be a good friend. Since your stint in the emergency room he’s made good on his agreement with you, without ever being overwhelming. He’s instead mercifully subtle. There’s a few bottles of lemonade kept in the office’s mini-fridge now, for when you get dizzy. He’s lent you that coat of his a few times, when the night air ends up chillier than you predicted that morning, and you’ve left your own jacket at home. And he never fails to give you a look, during the busiest hours at the restaurant, communicating quickly, and quietly: Are you good? And you know if the answer is no, he’ll let you take a breather without a single complaint, but you always respond with a quick nod and push through the rest of the shift.
In turn, you do your best not to worry him. You take vitamins and get better sleep and try to stop pushing yourself to the brink of passing out. You even eat one of your safe foods in front of him, at family while everyone else enjoyed the samosas Ebrahaim had cooked up that day, and for once it felt good to eat; the constant playful bickering and banter a welcome distraction from the usual stress that follows your meals. 
It’s nice. Maybe you don’t necessarily feel like you’re getting better, just more… stable. Less like you’re in a free-fall and more like you’ve got both feet on solid ground. 
When you go to leave after closing up one night and find that it’s raining, impeding you from making your usual trek to the train station, you turn back and head to the office. And a few months ago, you might’ve been too nervous around Carmy to even ask to stay in the restaurant an extra hour, preferring to brave the cold rain and let your clothes get soaked and heavy rather than hang around. You’re relieved, now, to find Carmy right where you left him when you said goodnight just a minute ago, ready to save you from a miserable trip home. 
“What’s up?” He asks when he spots you. 
“It’s raining.” You tell him, nodding your head in the direction of the back door. “Didn’t bring an umbrella. Do you mind if I stick around for a bit, just ‘till it stops?” 
“Yeah, it’s no problem, I’ll be here finishing up for a while, anyway,” He says, then continues after a brief pause. “Y’know you really gotta stop relying on that iPhone weather app.”
You scoff, shaking your head at his teasing. 
“You know I’m too lazy to start using another one.”
“I’m just sayin’.” He pushes out of his chair and walks past you, into the kitchen, grabbing a sponge and the container of soap water he uses to clean the countertops. 
“You want help?” You offer, already taking off your coat and tossing it onto the office chair. 
“Nah, you already clocked out. Don’t worry about it.” He replies, not even looking up as he begins to scrub, but you pick up a sponge anyway and get to work on the counter behind him. 
You fall into a comfortable silence for a while after that, only broken by the sound of rough sponges scraping away at the grime and the faint patter of rain on the roof of the building, and part of you wishes you had more opportunities for this. More time spent with him, outside of the hustle and bustle of the restaurant, even if it’s spent cleaning. His presence has become something you’d rather not avoid, even if it makes your heart race; the unique scent of him on the coat you’ve borrowed is becoming familiar, comforting. 
“Glad it wasn’t busy today.” Your train of thought is interrupted by his sudden comment, but you quickly nod. 
“Practically a miracle, for a Friday.” You agree, hearing him chuckle behind you. 
“Didn’t need that shit today, anyways, not while I’m on,” He says. He was working the stovetop today, alongside Sydney, making an efficient team as they churned out dishes quicker than the customers could file in. It made your day a little easier, the delicious aroma wafting from the kitchen while you savored the downtime granted by the slow day. 
“I’ve never tried your cooking,” You say offhandedly, but your words make him pause and look back at you, eyebrows raised in surprise. 
“Really?” He asks, and you nod. “You’ve worked here for months, though.” 
“I know.” You shrug. 
“How come?” 
That makes you stop scrubbing, turning slightly to look at him. 
“Think you know the answer to that one, chef.” You tease, before continuing to work. He huffs out a laugh, but keeps staring at your back while you scrub. 
“I could make you something.” He finally says, and it makes you truly stop, turning to face him fully. 
“Y’all just cleaned this whole kitchen.” Now it’s his turn to shrug. 
“I don’t mind.” You give him an incredulous look.
“I- If you think I’m gonna help you clean the stove and the plates again, you’re wrong.” Carmy just shakes his head, tossing his sponge back into the container of water and grabbing a few clean pans. 
“C’mon, I can’t have you walking around saying you’ve never tried the food at the restaurant you work at,” He says. “You like spaghetti?”
He’s casual in the way he asks, but you’re still standing by the counter, eyebrows raised in shock. Your mind is starting to race, the way it does every time you’re faced with food, but Carmy’s already pouring olive oil into a saucepan and brandishing his chef knife to chop an onion. 
You approach the stove he’s standing at carefully, like it might just burst into flames, and you can already smell the familiar scent of garlic and olive oil and god, he’s only been at it for a minute and it already smells like heaven in this kitchen. 
“Smell good?” 
“Yeah,” You practically breathe out. “Shit, smells amazing.” 
He smiles at that, a rare thing to see on his face. He’s thoughtful for a moment, before saying:
“This is, uh, Mikey’s recipe, actually.” 
Your eyes widen, a bit taken aback by his mention of his late brother. At least, his mention of Mikey to you. 
You’d learned about what happened to Michael just a few weeks after being hired, after having witnessed the heavy silence that overtook the room when he’d been mentioned, and asking Marcus after work what all that had been about. Since you received your explanation, you’ve tried to mind your own business when the melancholy that came with Michael’s memory returned, giving those who seemed to know him best room to process before getting back to work. 
Carmy’s never talked about Mikey to you directly; no one has. You’re not sure what to say. 
“Mikey, that’s… your brother, right?” You ask hesitantly, even if you already know the answer before Carmy nods. 
“Yeah. He used to run this place, before it was The Bear.” He tells you. 
“Before?” Your confusion and surprise seeps into your tone. “What was it before?”
“Still a restaurant, but, quick service. Italian sandwiches. We weren’t called The Bear, we were-“ He chuckles, caught up in reminiscing. “We were called The Original Beef of Chicagoland.” 
“No shit! This used to be The Beef?” He nods his confirmation and you’re instantly brought back, the memory faded like an old photo that’s been shoved into storage and forgotten. The only thing that wasn’t hard to recall was the sandwich you’d ordered, practically dripping with flavor, the exact kind of comfort food you’d needed that day.
“Been here before?” He asks.
“Yeah, I just- I didn’t recognise it.” You’d sat at a table across from the friend that dragged you to the slightly shabby establishment, silently relishing in the deliciousness of your food before the panic could set in, so enraptured by it you didn’t even care about the booming voice coming from behind a door that presumably led to the kitchen. Not even when the person it belonged to came out to the front and-
“Mikey, was he like, tall? Black hair?” You suddenly ask, gesturing how tall you’d remembered the man being, and now Carmy’s the one that’s confused. 
“Uh, yeah. You- you knew Mikey?” He sounds a little breathless when he asks, but you shake your head. 
“No, but when I came here before, he was still running the place, I guess. And just… loud as shit. Hard to ignore,” You look up and meet Carmy’s eyes. “Hard to forget.” 
You both share a laugh at that, at the memory of his brother that he loved, and that you barely even knew. 
“Yeah, that definitely sounds like him.” The sweet smile stays on his face as he chops and sautées, refusing to let you do more than start boiling the spaghetti for him. All you can do is watch the pasta and watch him as he navigates his brother’s recipe like it’s pure muscle memory. 
As much as you like to steal glances at him during opening prep, you don’t get to see as much of him during service hours. You’re just as busy working front-of-house, keeping people happy and keeping Richie off your ass, as he is while he’s trying to keep up on dishes. You don’t get a ton of chances to see him like this, in his element. He plates the finished spaghetti perfectly, in two bowls, so you know he won’t let you eat alone. 
Still, the anxiety in your stomach rises when you accept the fork Carmy hands you, and you can’t help but pause. He does, too, and you know he easily recognises the cause of your trepidation. 
“What’s up?” He asks, his voice gentle. You shake your head, trying to rid yourself of the conflict in your mind, but you can’t stop yourself from saying it. 
“Do you… just, maybe have an idea of-“
“I have no clue how many calories are in this.” He answers your question before you can even ask it, and you can’t help but let out a breath of amusement — at yourself, at him for somehow knowing. 
It’s his gentle smile, one that lacks judgment or pity, that pushes you to finally swirl the spaghetti around your fork and take a bite and-
Oh my god. 
You can’t help the moan that escapes you during that first bite, ignoring Carmy’s chuckle at your slight dramatics. You can see why he’s hot shit in the restaurant world; the dish barely looked fancy or complicated when he’d made it, certainly not as complicated as anything on the menu, but somehow it tastes better than any pasta you’ve ever had. You would say you’re in disbelief, but you don’t pause long enough to think about anything but this, how amazing every flavor bursting on your tongue is.
Carmy finishes his pasta before you do, but he stands next to you till your bowl is empty, before taking it over to the dish pit and beginning to scrub down all the dishware he’d used. And you stand there for a second, staring at his back, unable to process all the emotion filling you as he washes your bowl. The bowl he let you get dirty, because he wanted you to be able to try his food. 
The utter warmth flooding your senses is almost overwhelming.
Then, despite your earlier protests, you pick up the sponge he abandoned earlier and get to scrubbing the stovetop down again. You ignore the few warm tears that escape your waterline in the process. 
You mindlessly follow Carmy around as he walks through each room, shutting off lights and locking the front entrance and office doors. When you inevitably make your way to the back exit, you push open the door only to find that it’s still raining, worse than it was hours ago. You can only sigh and lean your head against the doorway in defeat. 
“Need a ride?” Carmy offers easily. 
You think back to the frame that sits on the countertop out front, holding a slightly crumpled index card: “I love you, dude. Let it rip.” Words you’ve seen nearly every day since your first on the job; you just now realize they’re probably Michael’s.
It feels like too much. The letting you stick around, the pasta, the… everything. 
You nod anyways, accepting Carmy’s offer, letting him lead you to his car, and he lets you lead the way home.
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dev1lm4n · 1 year
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lesson two: tease
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ko-fi | series masterlist (5 out of 7)
pairing: porn star!joel miller x f!reader
summary: tension is on the rise between you and mr. miller. wicked fantasies hadn't posted for an entire month! desperate, you decided to get even more bold with your requests and he had no difficulty in complying.
word count: 4.8k
warnings: explicit (18+), set in 2013, pre-outbreak, age gap (joel in mid 30's and reader in early 20's), inexperienced but not dumb reader, blowjob, f masturbation, check umbrella warning on series masterlist
notes: tension is literally on the rise! the vase is about to crack, but tonight he decides to indulge. fellas if you enjoyed this do COMMENT, REBLOG or buy me a KO-FI ;) love y'all
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Broad shoulders.
During the time when you simply saw Mr. Miller as a figure in your lewd fantasies, you knew that it was the roughness of his build that attracted you. There’s a certain market for it; for women and men alike who enjoyed those who're built like burly vikings straight out of a movie. Those who enjoy men with a slight plumpness on their front, those who salivate over their strong and reliable arms, those who strive to caress their calloused fingers and press kisses onto their rigid knuckles. You’ve never confessed this to anyone - mostly terrified for their reserved judgment over the topic - but you fit perfectly in that box. Time after time, you wonder if it’d feel nice, if you could just press your nifty fingers into the coils of his muscles, if he’d let out a groan.. a moan perhaps from the sensation.
Rough fingers.
After spending two minutes staring intensely at his sturdy, slightly hunched build, you finally gathered enough courage to summon yourself into the kitchen. God, he looked so good just washing the dishes. His already calloused fingers didn’t have to worry about the damage those cheap dish soap does, because if anything, it’d just make it better. More ridges means more texture and more texture feels better. Two of his fingers entered the soapy lining of his mug, spreading the cleaning product into every crack and crevice. It looks a little erotic, you decided. Your filthy mind conjured up altered scenarios which implemented the same motion. You’d be on top of the cold countertop, various kitchen gadgets set aside as his fingers delved into your cunt. He’d spread your wetness the same way he did to the mug.
Thick mustache.
He took notice of your presence. He watched you and you allowed him, even if he did so wordlessly. Water continued to spill out of the faucet. It hit the empty bottom of the sink and sprouted upwards in a gauche manner, effectively wetting his gray shirt in blotches and dots. You breathed out what could pass as a dry chuckle and in return, he quirked his lips. A grin. A youthful one that almost made you forget of his crow’s feet and faint lines. His thin upper lip almost disappeared as it was tugged on both sides, but the dark hair on top remained pristine. It was thick, you concluded. Not as thick as Uncle Tommy’s, but thick enough that he’d get marinara sauce on it every pasta night. Thick enough that you wonder what it’d be like to have it graze your sensitive pelvis.
Fuck, he’s hot and you’re unreasonably horny.
“Hey.”
“Hey, kiddo,” he parroted back, only with the help of that damned nickname he’s stamped onto you.
Crunch
You bit into the red apple you found during your little scavenging trip into his refrigerator. The sound broke whatever trance he had placed you under. With those eyes of yours, pupils rounded and lashes batted, it was a dangerous game you’re playing. When had you gotten so shameless towards Mr. Miller? Perhaps it’s when he touched you in an irrevocably pleasurable way, or perhaps it’s when he hadn’t posted a video for an entire month. He missed his posting schedule, two whole weeks post-’Dirty Fridays’, and it’s severely messing with your head. You’ve always been a good viewer. Always being content with what he had put out and would never harass him for more, but it’s been a long month repeating the same 13 minute long video.
You’re bound to get restless.
“Didn’t see you come home yesterday.”
“I was busy.”
Crunch
With other girls? In that trailer studio of yours? The question sat on the tip of your tongue. A breath away from being exposed into the dense air. You turned to lean your lower back onto the edge of the countertop, eyes still trained on his as you hitched yourself atop the smooth surface. Your fingers grazed the squared edges, just to keep you occupied while you dug under the surface of his browns. You wondered what he was so busy with - wondered what’s going on behind the tightly knitted cloak of guise he wore, wondered what he thought of you after his little lesson. He wasn’t a shy one. Mr. Miller stared back into your pupils. His chest raised and lowered with every blink he took.
You swallowed nervously.
“Workin’ doubles,” he cracked. “I ain’t sharin’ the job with anyone other than Tommy.”
“Is that so?”
“You think I’m lyin’?”
Crunch
You couldn’t read him. You’ve never been able to. There’s just a huge boulder sitting behind those irises, one that’s blocking you from understanding him even further. It’s not like it’s your business anyway. You’re content with spending your downtime with Sarah; screaming your hearts out to Taylor Swift’s I Knew You Were Trouble on the radio, painting each others’ nails, and making the ultimate pancake with chicken. You’re content with just watching him through his videos, reimagining those situations with the new knowledge you’ve acquired from him. You’re content with standing at a distance from him. So, it wouldn’t be logical to get all protective over him. What are you? His crazy ex-girlfriend?
“How’s Sarah?”
“Great,” you mumbled, mouth still half full. “Taught her fractions yesterday. Swear she’s getting smarter than me.”
“How’s Simon?”
Crunch
Things with Simon, surprisingly, went on smoothly. After that mediocre dinner, where you proceed to let Mr. Miller finger you afterwards in order to introduce you to the new world of sex, you’ve exchanged a few messages and a few perfectly appropriate photos. It’s been awhile since you actually put any effort into trying to get into a relationship, due to work loads and a special dependance towards a pornstar, but it’s much better than you expected. He’s a nice boy. He would treat you right if you gave him the chance to, but you couldn’t help but think that you’re doing all this out of spite. Doing this to show off how capable you are to Mr. Miller, to busy yourself off those plaguing thoughts of him.
“Simon’s doing okay. Fine. He took me for ice cream after my classes yesterday.”
“Offered you a ride, right?”
“Yup.”
He taught you well.
“You’ve done it with him then?”
Your heart clenched.
“Done what?”
“What I taught you.”
Why is he so candid about the entire ordeal?
It was like being held at gunpoint. You watched his eyes, then found it to be too oppressive so you looked down to meet his wet hands. He had finished washing all the plates and cutleries from the breakfast you and Sarah made, though his thick fingers still gripped onto the edge of the metal sink, wet and dripping. You looked up once again, trying to find a part of him that doesn’t make you all jittery and awkward.
“Yes.”
Your lie must’ve been undetectable since you quickly caught on to how his brows tangled and unraveled, a habit of his you’ve picked up recently, signaling that he’s processing the information and giving it a good thought.
“Was it as good?”
Crunch
You nodded surely with a mouthful of tangy apple. There’s no way you could get away with lying so blatantly the second time so you decide the nod would affirm your position better instead of scramble it. He cocked his head to the side, arrogant as always, with some sort of interest in his eyes. You could just tell something foul was about to come out of those sharp tongue of his, when all of a sudden, a clatter sounded out from beyond the window. Both of you turned your heads in sync, following after where the presumable source was. There he was. Tommy in all of his youthful glory. One of his jean legs drenched and beside him was a metal bucket, laying pitifully with its contents poured out onto the sidewalk. He was cursing. A garbled mess of English, while he soothed his pained arse.
“Fuckin’ hell.”
He let out a sigh as he finally tore his gaze away from you to wipe his hands onto a kitchen rag.
“Gotta get goin’,” he whispered hurriedly, fingers running down his messy hair to smooth them down. “You need anything, sweetheart?”
You shook your head no and he took it as a cue to leave the premises. He rushed to pick up his phone from the dining room table, eyes fleeting to find his wallet right after.
“Hey, Mr. Miller.”
He turned his head to meet your eyes.
“You busy tonight?”
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Dinner had always been a lonesome affair for you.
Back when you still live in your parents’ cluttered mishmash of a house, you’d always opt out of family dinner. Not because you weren’t particularly fond of your mother’s cooking, her one pot recipes will still remain nostalgic in your head despite time, but more because you’d rather not indulge in petty arguments. They’d always argue. Your mother would flash you that look of hers, silently demanding you to stay on her side when it comes to dealing with your father’s frequent misdemeanors. He’d complain about the tiniest bits of things. If the lettuce was too wilted or if you were wearing too much makeup. He’s an ass, sure, but it’s not like your mother’s planning to abandon him anytime soon. They’re conjoined at this point. Even when it’s massively unhealthy, especially for spectators like you.
In Mr. Miller’s home, oftentimes, you’d put together an edible meal for the entire family. Mr. Miller was a hard worker, according to the accounts that he made, so it’s not rare that you’d have to fry up sausages and whip mashed potatoes together for Sarah. It’s not as if he made it your responsibility. He’d encourage the two of you to order take outs or phone in the pizza place, but that couldn’t be good for Sarah’s growth or his own pocket. And as much as you’d like to deny it, you’re growing way too fond of the Millers.
But it’s been far too long since you crossed path with Mr. Miller. Far too long that you might’ve forgotten what his natural musk after a long day smelt like. Far too long that you might’ve forgotten how heavy his boots were as it dragged across the tiles. Far too long that you surely misses him.
You’re nervous.
Unreasonably so when the promise you’ve made with him was simply for dinner. Nothing less or more. Just dinner. Was the invitation you gave him.. too much? Was it too flirty? Was it silly to think that he might’ve entertained the little show you put out? The desperate stares and chewed lips, you’re undeniably begging for attention. Begging for him to pay attention to you, see what you’re made out of, doesn’t he want to unravel you more? The audacity you have was laughable.
How pathetic, you thought. 
Just like clockwork, Mr. Miller showed up right after your self-deprecating cycle. Right after all that flirty and playful energy got brutally murdered by common sense. Right after they were buried in a graveyard of mistakes and what was left was simply the putrid scent of shame. Your head perked up expectantly. As if the mere sight of him in his work uniform,  a combo of worn-out flannel shirts and dark-washed jeans, would cure you of exhaustion. Mr. Miller came barging into the hallway. His thumb and index finger diligently massaged the tall bridge of his nose, eyes closed and nose flared from breathing too hard. Your eyes finally made its rounds to where his free arm was propped up on his waist. Sleeves rolled to where it was physically impossible to roll them higher.
He didn’t look like he was in the best of moods.
And somehow.. somehow it excites you.
“Hi, how are you?” you spoke stiffly as if you’re one of those supermarket cashiers, posture straightening upon his arrival.
“Not good,” he replied gruffly.
Mr. Miller made his way to you. He appeared to be the same height and stature as he’s always been, but for whatever reason, he looked a lot larger. As if he could bite and tear you into chunks of flesh if he truly desired to. His movements were staggered. Each step seemed to be more and more of a hassle to him. He had this.. frown on his face. You could even call it a scowl. Forehead waved with folds of worries, lips tightened into an irritated pull as he finally settled down across from you. This new side to him made your limbs limp and your heart spasm. A squeeze each time his narrowed eyes met yours.
“Everything.. okay?” you mused out.
“Just a bunch of shit piling up,” he reasoned, looking down to meet the plate you carefully crafted for him. “Nothin’ to worry your pretty little head.”
The plate’s cold, boiled asparagus hardened and packaged chicken dried, but he didn’t even consider complaining. His brown eyes took in the effort you gave, a brief sheen of guilt glazing those pretty eyes of his before he picked up his fork and spoon. You watched him with care. His every move calculated and drilled deep into your head.
“Sarah asleep?”
“Mhm. I bored her to death with trigonometry,” you chuckled lightly. “She’s okay. Just.. she’s been asking for you. Asking me why you’re always home late.”
Joel’s eyes perked up from the plate. He met your eyes, but it almost felt like he’s looking right through you, over your head to where he could contemplate his decisions. You knew this just from looking, but Joel Miller had a fear of not being a good parental figure. Sarah only had one and he’s barely ever home. That sort of thought festered over him and took over any sort of inhibition. Any sort of clear thinking, that he’s doing all these side jobs to help support her further in life, that it was all for her. Mr. Miller beats himself up too much, but it’s not like you had any right to intervene. You watched as he indulged in the asparagus, seeing how it’s grown cold enough to feel like metal rods when bitten into. He chewed on it with a solemn expression, a curl between his brows.
“Sorry for putting you through this, sweetheart,” he hummed. “I could.. should actually hire help.”
You waited a beat.
“You’ve been doing me too much favor. It’s not.. right.”
“Don’t need to.”
“Why?”
“Always happy to help.”
“But-”
“It’ll cost you too much for help. You’d be sleeping at your job if that happens.”
He could easily earn up to thousands if he gave into the temptations and started working for a mainstream adult film company. One that’s easily recognized from its corny storylines and cringy high-pitched over-the-top moans. Mr. Miller would be a hit, you’re sure of that. Mainstream porn only requires two things when it comes to male actors: a pretty reasonably-sized cock and charisma. Both in which he had under his belt. If he weren’t so particular with the actresses he chose, the angles in which he filmed, and the routine in which he performed in, perhaps he wouldn’t have to beat himself up to skin and bones. You leaned your cheeks onto the palm of your hands as you watched him devour his dinner.
“I need a favor.”
His fork paused.
“But you- well, you’ll laugh.”
He looked up. The crinkles beside his eyes seemed a lot more prominent, as if he’s thoroughly entertained by your youthful silliness.
“What is it? Somethin’ for Simon is it?”
He’s spot on and it’s making you shrink.
“What?” he chuckled gruffly. “You gonna ask me to teach ya how to blow a guy? Oh.. or how to hang him up in ribbons?”
You looked away, awkwardly scratching your elbow.
“Fuck. I’m spot on, am I? Didn’t take you for a kinky gal.”
“No! God, no,” you looked at him, horrified. “Not the latter.”
“The former then?”
“The former.”
The former. You couldn’t bear to wait for his delayed answer. It’s shameless for you to be asking a second time, but you couldn’t help yourself. You’re pent-up, desperate, and he’s your porn star crush forfuckssake. You stood up from where you’re seated. Your gaze was averted completely, to the point where it’s tilted at an uncomfortable angle to shuffle away from his attention. It’s better to sleep it off. Then maybe you’d act like all this didn’t happen the next day. Sarah’s going to be around for breakfast, so he’d surely keep his mouth in check and draw his way out of this. Wouldn’t he.. would he-
“Hey, hey slow down.”
You felt a hand stop you. His grip was tight, possibly bruising if you were to retaliate any other way. It was still hard to meet his eyes, especially when you had to make the special effort to tilt your head up in order to meet his searing gaze. You waited instead, letting him hinder you of any movements as you stared intensely into his flannel-cladded chest. What was he going to say? Is he going to call you up for your perverseness? Was he-
“I’ll do it.”
“What?”
“I said I’ll do it.”
His voice clambered in the chambers of your heart. Masculine, thick with an inch of Southern bass, he took hold of your other hand with those thick fingers of his. This was different from your first lesson. He looked much more.. impatient. A bit of a rough edge when it comes to handling you, a pretty little thing that’s too brave and forward for your own good. His scent, fragments of wood and a taste of clean laundry, permeated the thick air around you. You inhaled him. All of him for the first time in a very very long week. He released the steel grip he had around your wrists and traced it over the rough outline of your body. Up, up, up, until he reached the span of your shoulder. Your breath hitched. All you could feel in your heart was a repeating desire for himhimhim.
He pushed you down slowly, guiding you to lower yourself before him. Right until your knees hit the freezing linoleum tiles beneath his feet. What were you doing? Is it the right decision to fall back into the same old mistake?
“Have you ever practiced on anything before?” he chuckled, almost demeaning in a sense. “A banana or a hairbrush perhaps?”
You shook your head no. All you could see was his dirty jeans, stained of dry concrete and paint.
He brought his rough fingers down to graze against your chin, tilting it upwards so that you’d face him. His eyes were dark, hooded, and trying its best to conceal its obvious amusement. Your chest heaved up and down. Nervous of what he’s about to do next.
“Let’s practice first, ‘kay, sweetheart?” he muttered.
Mr. Miller brought his other pair of fingers next to your face, cradling it with such reverence. He swiped your lips. Bottom then top, only to delve inside your mouth to wet it with enough lubricant. He’s initiating it. His little routine. The older man brought two of his fingers, his index and middle, before he inserted it slowly into your wet cavity. Slowly. Achingly slow. He made sure that you’re comfortable with just a knuckle deep before he proceeded to push in further until the tips sat at the very beginning of your tongue. It wasn’t a familiar feeling like rubbing your clit. You struggle not to gag, or to whimper at the sheer lewdness of the scene unfolding.
“Ah, what a smart girl,” he mused. “Lay your tongue flat for me.”
Your clammy palms fell helplessly atop your smooth pajama pants, gripping on the cotton everytime it felt like too much. His thick fingers separated to make the girth much larger, preparing you for what’s to come. It’s almost as if you could taste him. Taste the natural scent Mr. Miller has around him at all times, taste the carnal desire he held for this. You knew he wouldn’t openly admit it, but this time, it truly looked like he’s looking forward to ripping your innocence away. All his feigned affection stretched thin as you obeyed him perfectly. Tongue flat on the base of your mouth, you breathed in through your nose as best as you can.
“That boy wouldn’t like it if you’re sharp with your teeth,” he muttered as he pulled his fingers away. A string of saliva connected the tip of his wet fingers to your slacked jaw. Oh, how vulgar. Your tight entrance twitched and throbbed inside your panties. Arousal started to wet the thin material, painting dark circles that contrast with the bright color. You were heaving, panting from the sudden increase of oxygen. “So no teeth, keep your tongue flat, and breathe through your nose.”
“You got that, sweetheart?”
“Yes.”
“Yes, who?”
“Yes, Mr. Miller.”
“Alright. Would you like me to take my pants off or do you wanna try it yourself?”
You looked up at the tempting prospect. He gave you a little nod, affirming that you indeed had the upper hand to the situation. And just like that your hands were quick to get on the perimeter of his belt. You loosened the leather from its metal confines, slowly pulling it away from the hook before leaving it. The leather hung from where his two front loops were located. Meekly, you looked up once more as your soft fingers felt his buttons up. He hissed through his pursed lips, a good reaction you assume, as you slowly unbuttoned the main button. You were confident enough now to tug away at his zippers. Step one was completed, you’ve successfully opened him up like a Christmas present.
But.. what’s next?
“What do I do next?”
“What do you think you do?”
You reached out for the waistband of his briefs, but you were quickly met with a little slap on the back of your hand. Not a hurtful one. Just a little reminder.
“It’s best if you get him worked up first so he’s fully hard when you’re ready,” he whispered. “Why don’t you press some gentle kisses on it?”
You hummed in agreement, before you did as you’re told. Even with the dim lighting of the dining room, you could see clearly where the outline of his cock is. It’s semi-erected, you deduced. You’ve seen him in all his glory to the point where you could calculate how much more he could grow. Gently, you closed the gap between you and those pair of briefs he’s wearing. Your mouth was hot and warm in contrast to the cold air, so when you finally pressed a kiss on top of his clothed shaft, his cock twitched immediately. You could feel it and see it too in certain lighting. Encouraged, you press even more kisses on each and every spot, slowly building up the desire until you reach the leaking tip. You nuzzled your nose close. It smelled like him, salty with a tinge of masculine musk.
This turned you on so much that you inevitably grinded your bottom towards the cold tile. Nothing was there to satiate your throbbing core, just a short term burst of pleasure.
“Shit, sweetie,” he hissed. “I think you’re ready.”
With haste, you quickly tugged on his waistband. You didn’t expect for his length to pop out that quickly, the startled reaction you had was proof of that. He looked.. pretty. Blushed beige with a ruddy tip that's covered. It’s a little silly that that’s the first thing that came to your mind, but it’s the truth. You’d never guess that you could get this up close. Eye level to the cock you’ve been fantasizing about, where you could practically see each and every one of his veins. You didn’t say one word. Instead, you settled on observing the new interest. Your one finger went up curiously to touch the white substance that’s pooling up top. Sticky, you thought. Out of curiosity, you stuck the lone finger down your throat. Salty was the next thought in line.
“Didn’t expect you to taste it,” he chuckled.
You simmered in the sudden embarrassment.
“What’s next? Should I just put it in my mouth?”
“You could.”
“There’s another way?” you peered up curiously.
“Well,” he hummed. You watched as his finger pried your lips open once more, urging you to stick out your wet tongue. “You could make a show out of it. Look me in the eye and lick me slowly.”
You quirked your eyebrows as if unsure if this will work. You’ve never taken yourself as a ‘sexy’ person. Will this even work? To get rid of those plaguing thoughts, you decided to take a leap of faith. You stuck your tongue out more and slowwwwly dragged it along his salty length. You made sure to keep your eyes on his, watching his every micro reaction to decide which one pleased him more. This is supposed to be about Simon! Why are you.. seeking for his validation? On instinct, you pulled the hooded skin back to reveal his furiously red tip. You laughed nervously before you experimentally sucked on it. The wet warmth instantly had him buck up into you, a strained groan following suit. 
“Oh shit,” he cursed. “You’re doing good.”
Getting confident, you decided to suckle on it a little more. It tasted a lot more intense than what you’ve tasted of him, but it wasn’t bad at all.
“You think you could take more, sweetheart?”
You nodded before letting his length infiltrate your mouth even more. The end touched the back of your throat ambitiously before you had to pull back and set yourself onto his sensitive tip once more. It wasn’t as easy as his co-stars are making it seem. There was a rhythm in which you have to master, a balance of push and pull so that you don’t gag at the intrusion. His soft groans were heavenly. You didn’t get to hear much of it the first time around, but now it’s all you could think of. You can’t take it anymore! You just had to touch yourself.
“Shit, you’re a dirty gal, are ya?” he chuckled. “Had to touch yourself to this?”
You cried out a muffled moan. It was all too familiar. The way in which you slipped your hand into your pants, shuffling between the layers of panties to rub at your clit. You were already drenched with need. Strings of arousal webbed between your fingers as you rubbed figure eights all across the sensitive patch of nerves. You’re losing track of the rhythm and Mr. Miller took notice of that. He was kind enough to lead you. His fingers slotted perfectly behind the crown of your head, guiding you in a pace you could tolerate.
“Perfect mouth for little Simon,” he degraded.
Mr. Miller’s large hands continued to move you at a certain pace. The time slot left for you to gather your breath tightened and it’s almost like you could pass out from the lack of oxygen. But it felt too good. He tasted too nice. You’ve got his cock in your mouth and it’s spurting out tangy liquid goodness onto your tongue, what else can you ask for? 
You continued to grind onto the palm of your hand, desperate enough to not think of how shameless you looked. So slick, your fingers let out a lewd pop everytime it dipped inside of you. Usually you weren’t fond of vaginal penetration by yourself, but the thought of having his cock inside of you left you rabid. This was supposed to be about Simon, is it not?
“You wanna know what a real man tastes like?” he mused out lazily.
You nodded desperately. Mr. Miller held your head tight against his pelvis. Your nose grazed against the coarse dark curls he had as he twitched inside of you. You continued to slick the pads of your fingers against yourself. An entire week of masturbation being combined into one as you felt that familiar pressure build in your stomach. A coil waiting to be snapped.
“Sh- shit.”
Mr. Miller broke first. He hunched slightly as he rode his orgasm out. You could see how his legs trembled and his hips bucked himself even further down your throat. 
There it was. The salty trace you tried earlier came in big spurts down your throat, only when you couldn’t fit more did it start seeping out your mouth. It dribbled down the gaps between his softened cock and your aching mouth, stripes of white just trickling down vulgarly. You moaned into his cock, wetting the flimsy material of your panties. A combination of the scent his cock gave to the familiar rubs to your clit had you seeing stars. You knew for a fact that the linoleum tiles would be soaked with your juices when you come up to your feets. 
This isn’t a problem anymore, it’s a catastrophe.
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mykneeshurt · 11 months
Note
Can u PLEASE write me a little drabble abt Simon with his wife (me)?? Maybe some fighting, ft. Some makeup sex??? Thanks bestie 🫶🏻
Bestie am so sorry this has taken months. It’s been half done in my notes for ages. But it’s done! I hope you enjoy ❤️
Mine
Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x F!reader
Warnings - 18+, minors DNI, explicit smut, jealous behaviour (we do not like this in relationships irl)
Gaz sat opposite you, smiling as he nursed a pint of Guinness. The busy hum of the pub buzzed around you both, the joyful laughter of jokes shared, the clinking of glasses and the gleeful rowdiness of patrons enjoying their time together. This was your favourite pub, built in 1800, dark beams adorned the ceiling and a gorgeous stone fireplace hugged the corner.
You sipped your wine, the warm hug of alcohol coursed through you as you allowed the tangy taste wash over your tastebuds. This was your fourth? Fifth glass of wine? You were waiting for the rest of the boys to turn up, to celebrate a mission well done. Soap was going to be late, of course, and the Captain was on his way. No word from Ghost though, something you were used to.
Gaz glanced down at the sparkling band on your left hand. ‘How is married life then?’ Smiling you shrugged ‘exactly the same.’ He let out a hearty laugh ‘well that’s a good thing! Just goes to show a piece of paper doesn’t mean a thing. Is he just as allusive at home as he is in work? Ghost by name Ghost by nature?’
‘Actually no, and he’s not that allusive in work. He just likes to get the job done. And anyway…’ you smirked as you tapped his knee ‘I don’t kiss and tell.’
Gaz rolled his eyes, blinding you with his dazzling smile. If Ghost hadn’t have made a move on you, you would have definitely asked Gaz out. You worked for the intelligence sector, which is how you met Taskforce 141. Laswell introduced you during a briefing and the rest was history. You gelled well with the team, dishing out the banter just as well as you took it. Calm, collected and logical, you were an asset to them and they knew it.
‘So…’ you asked inquisitively ‘how’s your lady friend? Is it still going well?’ Gaz dropped his shoulders before he lowered his gaze. ‘Nah, we split up last week. I’m ok though.’
‘Oh Gaz! I’m so sorry! What happened?’ You asked as you pulled him into a hug. ‘Eh. Just wasn’t meant to be. Plenty other fish in the sea. I’ll be fine. Promise.’ While you believed him he still looked crestfallen, you knew how much he liked her.
Before long Soap and the Captain joined you, pints in hand as they scooted around the table. ‘Know when he’ll be joining us?’ Soap asked as he took a long sip. ‘No idea, you know what he’s like. He just materialises out of no where. Still does it to me in the house, can’t hear the fucker’ you giggled. The boys followed suit, laughing into their drinks at the expense of your husband.
Your husband who had been watching you from a small corridor next to the bar. Having felt the hairs on the back of your neck stand to attention you gazed around the room. Until your eyes connected with his, a devilish twinkle illuminating within the darkness. He stood leaning against the door frame, arms crossed, biceps bulging beneath his black t-shirt.
With a swift ‘excuse me gentleman, need to use the ladies room’, you scurried to the toilet. But before you could enter he pinned you against the wall. ‘How the fuck do you do that?! You just fucking appear!’ Your tone was half playful, half annoyed. He ran his thumb along your jaw, ‘not here.’
Pulling you through a door he very hastily led you to the cellar. Dull lightbulbs barely lit the damp and musty cellar, plenty of dark corners amongst the barrels and crates of alcohol. ‘What are you doing?’ You huffed as you skipped wooden steps to keep up with him. His hand gripped your arm tightly. Almost possessively. ‘Simon for fucks sake!’
He swung you round a corner and pushed you up against the stone wall, both hands placed next to your shoulders as he crowed you in. ‘Havin fun with Gaz eh? Didn’t think he was your type.’ He chewed his jaw, lips pressed into a tight line. ‘You better not be implying what I think you are’ you spat back.
‘You tell me. Patting his knee, hugging him for everyone to see.’ He lowered his lips to your ear, breath tickling the fine hairs on your neck, ‘you’re mine.’
Raising your ring finger you waved it in front of his face ‘I told you, till death to us part, and that will be here much sooner than you think unless you take it back.’ Holding your ground you stared up at your husband, daring him to imply something else. ‘Now can we go?’
As you went to leave he gripped your hair, pulling your neck back forcing you to look at him. This time against your will. ‘I take it back sweetheart, but first I think you need reminding of who you belong to.’ A wicked grin spread across his lips, that glint in his eye you knew all too well twinkled in the low light of the cellar. ‘Don’t you?’ He cocked his head to the side as he narrowed his eyes.
Hovering his lips barely above yours he whispered ‘I’m gonna fuck you. You’re gonna thank me. And you’re gonna sit next to Gaz with my cum dripping out of your beautiful pussy. Understand?’ Every word was perfectly spoken, his tongue hitting the roof of his mouth with every syllable.
Your mouth suddenly went dry, all moisture having suddenly evaporated. Pressing your thighs together you desperately tried to relieve the ache in your groin. But it was no use. ‘Yes’ you barely managed to whisper back ‘please.’
With an arrogant scoff he smiled as he placed his lips on yours. His kiss invaded your senses, his taste; a weak sting of bourbon, his smell; a mixture of fresh linen and sandalwood, his touch; firm, soft but demanding. Coaxing your mouth open he slowly worked his tongue into it, rolling it on top of yours, leading the dance between them. Making you deepen the kiss before he snatched it away, his kisses moved to your jaw, to your neck, to your ear. ‘Bet you’re fuckin soaking’ he muttered before nipping your ear.
And soaking you were.
A small moan escaped you which only confirmed his statement. With one hand on his shoulder you kept the other on the cold damp wall, something to try and keep you grounded. The muffled sounds of conversation upstairs penetrated the floorboards, reminding you how close you were to every Tom, Dick and Harry. You couldn’t lose yourself here, not like you wanted to.
With your mind being lost somewhere in between nirvana and reality, you hadn’t even noticed that he’d undone your jeans and was gently working his hand towards your pulsing core. Before any words of objection could even be spoken he’d moved your panties to the side and swiped a finger along your slit. A whine, much louder than you’d wanted slipped past your lips. Causing him to place a firm hand over them. ‘Shhhh sweetheart. Don’t wanna be caught do we?’
Shaking your head you tried desperately to keep composure as he slipped his fingers inside. Slowly but firmly he began to work up to a rhythm he knew you loved so well. Rolling your hips closer to him your chest heaved, his fingers filled you perfectly, they reached every spot you needed them to. The palm of his hand rubbed against your clit, adding a welcome wave of pressure as he continued working your cunt with one hand.
He removed his hand from your mouth, instead muffling your moans with his lips, his tongue, inhaling every sound with each kiss. Your mouths moved together in unison, deep and passionate.
This was exactly why you married him.
You allowed yourself to give into the pleasure, to feel every movement, every inch of his skin on yours. So much in fact when the door to the cellar opened you jumped, instantly trying to push him away. But he relented. Staring at him, eyes wide with panic he carried on, but slower. The person came down the rickety stairs and began searching for something. All the while Simon was knuckle deep in your cunt, feeling now tight you were getting.
The thought of getting caught was turning you on.
He kept going, adding more pressure to your clit. Your breath staggered, chest tight with anxiety or adrenaline you weren’t sure. But you were close, that you knew for certain. The person moved closer and closer to your position, which only spurred him on further. You could see their outline creeping further and further towards you. Again you tried to stop him, but he relented, instead placing a finger to his lips. Your hips squirmed beneath him, you high creeping closer and closer. That tightly wound spring ever so close to snapping. The walls felt like they were closing in, your hearing was replaced by white noise as tiny prickles of light invaded your vision.
He shook his head, knowing full well you were about to cum. Within the panic you faintly heard the person leave the cellar, the door closing with a click. ‘Fuck sake Simon!’ You panted, ‘that was so fucking close! We need to leave.’ Nipping your neck once more he spun you in one fluid movement, so you were now bent against the wall. Cheek pressed firmly into the cool stone. He snaked his hand through your hair forcing you to arch your back. ‘Not till I see my cum dripping outta that divine cunt love.’
A pathetic whine left your throat.
Pulling your jeans and panties down he held you in place with one arm. His belt and jeans rustled behind you and with one push he bottomed out inside you. Both of you released a breathy gasp at the very welcome feeling. ‘Si … oh fuck’ you moaned, voice cracking under the pressure. ‘Shit’ he muttered under his breath as he began to thrust. Calculated thrusts, firm, demanding and possessive, just like his kisses. You knew he was sending message, and it was clearly received.
You were his.
He was yours.
‘Touch yourself. Cum on this cock sweetheart’ he drawled, voice slurred and thick. You dropped your hand and began to play with your clit, your lost climax suddenly rushing back. He kept his pace, thrusting deeper into you with each movement. The sound of your pussy devouring his cock echoed in the cellar. ‘Fuck you’re so good. Pussys made for me eh?’
You tried to answer but no words would materialise. Eyes rolled back in your head, hair tussled and pussy dripping as he expertly brought you closer to euphoria. Instead small broken cries filled the silence in between thrusts. ‘Fuck … gonna … cum Si … don’t stop’ you barely managed to whisper. ‘That’s it, just like that sweetheart, lemme feel it.’
With a final stroke to your clit the white noise returned, the walls closed in and your breath caught in your throat as you came around him. A strangled yet muffled cry oozed from you, you bit into your arm to stifle the noises. ‘Good fucking girl’ he praised, you could hear the smirk in his voice. Cocky prick.
He wasn’t far behind, his thrusts suddenly became longer, sloppier, messy. To help him along you arched your back further, tightening your pussy around him. He choked out a moan as he fell over the edge. You felt him cum inside you, filling you completely. Looking over your shoulder at him you met his gaze, slight disbelief at what you’d just done, but filled with so much love and adoration.
‘Have you got a tissue?’ You asked whilst trying to catch your breath. With a light spank he hit your bare ass, ‘I meant it love. You’re gonna sit next to him with my cum dripping out of you.’ Scoffing at him you braced yourself as he pulled out, but not before he placed a tender kiss on the small of your back.
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ghosts-bandwagon · 2 years
Note
can we have a headcannon of y/n (female) thats throwing dark humour around everytime and have 141 + Rudy, Alejandro nd konig react to her lmao 🤣
Can we have that? 💜 Thank you
Girl. Literally me. (I give my coworkers whiplash but they dish it pretty good too lmao)
Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley:
Might actually get a decent laugh out of him, we’ve all heard his horrendous hilarious jokes, so we all know he can dish it, but can he take it? Depends on the type of humor
If it’s self-depreciating, probably not. Doesn’t really get it? Like he does but he sees you too positively for the humor to click.
Unalive jokes? Definitely not. Hates hearing it from you even if you’re laughing about it, so if you want to make them, you better be cheeky about it (“Head down, sergeant you’ll get spotted.” “Aw sweet, you think so?” You don’t have to be near him or even see him to feel his glare)
Jokes about your traumas? Not super keen on it but if you’re at a point in your life that you feel ok enough to laugh about it, he’s not one to take wind out of your sails (“Damn, this drink hits harder than my dad.” “Sweetheart. Please.”
But if your jokes are similar to his, then your chances of getting a laugh out of him went up exponentially (he thinks he’s so god damn funny and he’s right. king.)
“How do you turn a salad into a Cesar salad?”
“How?”
“Stab it 23 times.” Soap audibly groaned,
“That’s my girl.”
All in all, you’ll get a deep sigh with pinching the bridge of his nose for every joke you make, and maybe you’ll get a pretty laugh from him (god I bet his laugh is so nice 😭)
John ‘Soap’ MacTavish:
(laughs nervously) what the fuck?
He’s heard Ghost’s jokes firsthand, so the dark humor isn’t new to him. He might even laugh with you and crack a few of his own
Honestly, as long you’re having a laugh he’s not really that worried (still a little worried tho)
He trusts that if you’re feeling particularly bad about something, you’d talk to him about it and he’s here for that
He kind of enjoys the theatre of it, the dramatic reactions to something so seemingly mundane,
“So when are you gonna take me out?”
“To dinner? We just ate, bonnie.”
“… not what I meant but I love where your heads at.”
“Not in a million years.” He laughs kissing your temple and squeezing you against him
“So you’re saying there’s a chance? It’s just a matter of when, got it. Thanks babe, I owe you”
John Price:
He’s not thrilled about it but he’s worked with Ghost so he’s somewhat built a tolerance
He knows you sometimes use dark humor as a coping mechanism but he’ll tease you saying you should come with a warning label
He’s definitely choked at hearing some of the things come out of your mouth, at least the jokes relating to your own traumas, those always give him whiplash
He finds your situational dark humor much funnier than anything you might say that involves you being harmed, even if it is a joke that’s kind a nightmare scenario for him
Those will definitely get a chuckle out of him, just please stop making jokes about yourself, he loves you a little too much to stomach them
“What does my dad have in common with Nemo?” He refuses to answer, he knows, he fucking knows
“They both can’t be found.”
God damn it, sweetheart
Kyle ‘Gaz’ Gerrick:
He’ll join you for sure lmao
He’ll see you sparring on the mats with Soap and he sees you land a particularly rough kick that he managed to block
“Damn babe, that was clean. Now do it right here.” He’s pointing at his temple, you laugh and throw your sweaty towel at him
You’re out on recon and you’re making your way towards the targeted area,
“I’d be terrible if I was discovered, sure hope there aren’t any snipers to take me out. That’d be awful.”
Price groaned even as Kyle stifled a chuckle,
“Come on, love, we’re a bit too good to let that happen to you.”
“That’s the real tragedy, honestly.”
“Enough, you two.”
König:
He thinks you’re funny but low key a little worried at how easily the jokes come to you
But if you’re laughing and having a good time, then so is he!
Sometimes you really do say some crazy things and he doesn’t know whether to laugh or to hug you
He likes the jokes that have nothing to do with you much better, you’d be sitting at a briefing in the far corner when you lean in and whisper quietly,
“Köni, what’s red and bad for your teeth?”
“Hm?”
“A brick.”
He stifles a laugh and shakes his head, you can see the corners of his eyes crinkle as he tries to hide the smile.
Alejandro Vargas:
Honestly, he kind of gives me the vibe of “telling a joke becomes receiving a lecture”
Like you’ll make a joke and look at him and he’s deadpanned,
“Mi amor, that’s no laughing matter.” And then he goes into a full lecture about why what you said was out of pocket and a little hurtful
It’s not that he doesn’t understand the humor he’s just concerned
But, he prefers the goofier jokes I feel like,
“An apple a day keeps the doctor away, or at least it does if you throw it hard enough.”
“Mensa.” He pushes your shoulder playfully with a laugh.
Dumb jokes like that get a good laugh out of him, just don’t make them about you please he loves you so much and he will lecture you
Rodolfo Parra:
Mortified in Spanish
“Mi vida, please don’t make those jokes.”
They break his poor little heart :( he loves you so much it makes him sad to hear make such harsh jokes about yourself or even see such awful things
He sighs every time he hears one of your jokes and gives this look 🥺
He doesn’t like that you joke about yourself or the things that have happened to you like that
He understands that humor is sometimes a coping mechanism, but he’d much rather talk through the things you’re joking about
He just cares about you so god damn MUCH
But if they’re nonsensical, then he’ll chuckle quietly,
“You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving.”
“What? Amor you definitely-”
“You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.”
“Dios mío, amor.” He chuckles.
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