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Lost in The Shadows Masterlist
A/n: Here is the new story, we'll see what happens, as always to be tagged go to tagglist link in my bio or just down below, or send an ask, message or comment on this.
Summary: Y/n was a whisper on everyone in New York's lips, she practically ran the state, for the most part. She was only twenty-five and getting ready to find her third husband, she sat behind the desk where her father, and then her second husband sat once, and now she did.
(Mechanic!Bucky x Mob/Mafia Boss!Reader)
Tagglist // MasterlistÂ
{ Part 1 }
{ Part 2 }
{ Part 3 }
{ Part 4 }
{ Part 5 }
{ Part 6 }
{ Part 7 }
{ Part 8 }
{ Part 9 }
{ Part 10 }
{ Part 11 }
{ Part 12 }
{ Part 13 }
{ Part 14 }
{ Part 15 }
{ Part 16 }
{Part 17 -End-}
#bucky x reader#bucky x you#bucky barnes#marvel#bucky x y/n#bucky barnes x reader#sebastian stan x reader#sebastian stan#mob!bucky x reader#james buchanan bucky barnes#mob au#avengers mob au#mob!au#mob sebastian stan x reader#mob!bucky smut#mafia!bucky x reader#mafia romance#mafia!bucky#mafia bucky x reader#mechanic!bucky x reader#bucky x mob!reader#bucky x mafia!reader
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Wedded Bliss
Pairing: Mob!Bucky x Reader
Summary: The marriage was arranged, and the sex is deranged. Bucky is so obsessed with your pussy that he almost forgets heâs meant to be faking this whole thingâand hating it, like sworn enemies are supposed to do.
Warnings: 18+. Dubcon. Corruption kink. Virginity loss. Arranged marriage between enemies. Brat taming. Breeding kink. Beefy, mob boss Bucky devolving into a fall-to-his-knees-just-to-fuck-you kind of horny mess.
Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5
You kissed him and wished him dead in the same breath. You said âI doâ and meant âI donât,â exchanged your vows like your own last rites, and felt him slip the ring on your finger as if heâd just tightened a noose around your neck.
You didnât want to be a bride, and you sure as hell didnât want to be the bride to Mr. James Buchanan Barnes.
Frankly, you were mortified.
And terrified, too, now that you knew your groom might actually kill you in the kitchen of your honeymoon suite.
âHave you lost your fucking mind?!â
âI walked down the aisle, didnât I?â
Another plate went crashing on the wall behind your husbandâs head just as he managed to duck. He side-stepped a spray of porcelain and glass and probably crushed several hundred shards beneath his polished black oxfords when he walkedâstalkedâover to you.
Youâd just reared back to hurl a serving plate at his face when you found your speed swiftly outmatched. Bucky had your elbow gripped between his forefinger and thumb in less than a second, and, pinching the bone like he might readily break it, he said, even as always,
âPut it down.â
You did as he told you and dropped the platter to the floor with a crash.
Rather than berate you for the broken chinaâor the four other pieces before itâyour husband only smiled.
âAre we done?â
Hell, you wanted to be. Slide over a pen and a one-way plane ticket to someplace in BFE, and youâd be signing those divorce papers in a heartbeat. Unfortunately, your dear husband was just referring to the temper tantrum.
You werenât totally sure if you were finished on that front, so you looked him up and down and shrugged.
âNow darlingââ he started.
âDonât call me that.â
âLight of my lifeââ
âIâll kill you.â
Your cool, level-headed groom took each gibe like it was his sworn duty, and only when he yanked your wrists behind your back and shoved you toward the bedroom door did you sense that he might not be too pleased with your behavior.
Your knees struck the edge of the California King at the center of the room, and before you could will yourself not to fall face-first, Bucky nudged you hard again.
Still pinning your hands behind you, he followed your collapse on the bed and leaned over your prone body.
His breaths were hot on your ear; you could tell he was smiling as he started to hike your dress up your legs.
âItâs all part of the deal, doll.â
You wriggled under his hold and tried to angle yourself better to see him, hoping heâd see your scowl.
âThe deal was to get married,â you reminded him.
âMhmm,â Bucky hummed, just then starting to trail a finger up the uncovered skin of your calf with his other hand, âAnd what is it that married people do?â
You kicked your foot reflexively, paused, then said,
âFight. Constantly. Probably resent each other for the better part of two decades before we finally decide that âmaking it workâ for the kids isnât worth it at all, and I claim half of everything you own in a bitter divorce.â
That earned a chuckle from Bucky. He kept his roaming hand brushing up the back of your thigh and squeezed the flesh just below the swell of your rear.
âDonât worry, my lawyer drafted a pretty good prenup.â
You opened your mouth to speak, but then he was tracing the contour of your ass with his palm, and you cut yourself short. Bucky carried on, careless as ever.
âBut the kids you mentioned,â he said, âHow are we supposed to get those?â
You pursed your lips and tried hard not to move when his fingers drifted inwardâyou wouldnât give him the satisfaction of seeing you squirm. The bottom of your dress was bunched around your hips now, leaving you sorely exposed. Had your bridesmaids not thrust that stupid white lingerie set upon you hours before the wedding, you probably wouldâve chosen something a little more modest than a thong. But here you were.
At least the sight seemed appealing to your husband, whose eyes hadnât left you once while his hands grew even hungrier to feel your warmth.
âIâm hoping a sperm donor or one of your double-crossing mobster friends will knock me up, honestly,â you said, feigning enthusiasm at the thought.
A tart slap delivered to your ass told you that Bucky hadnât found that funny. After, he started kneading the skin a bit harder.
âNo shot,â he shook his head, suddenly gliding his fingers down closer to your core and waiting for you to say something in protest, âOnly one thatâs gonna be pumping this thing full of babies is me, I promise.â
It was like he wanted your retaliation, whether that be by a thinly veiled look of disgust or a reactionary jab of your own. You werenât keen on fulfilling any wish of his, but at this point, you felt you had no other choice. When you sensed he was distracted by the newly-discovered heat between your legs and had loosened his grip on your wrists, you flipped yourself over on the bed. Shoved at his chest before he knew what to do with himself.
Of course, the push didnât send him far, but it was enough to get his attentionâand his hands off of you.
âIâm not having your babies, Barnes! I am never going to fuck you, no matter how long we stay fake married,â you spat.
At that, Bucky just raised his eyebrows and wet his lips. You were cramming your wedding dress back into place, glaring at him the whole time, and were scarcely more aware of the bright, teeming city outside the window than you were of your husbandâs own growing erection.
Finally, youâd said it. His new wife wouldnât fuck him. The sound of your resistance was almost a pleasure unto itself, and the longer you stared at Bucky with growing contempt and resolve not to do that thing, the more determined he became to make it happen.
Cat-and-mouse games had long been a staple in his life, and he was pleased to see them carry into his marriage as well. Surely if heâd triumphed in every pursuit for the last twenty yearsâfacing the likes of some seriously execrable bandits and racketeersâhe could take on a bratty woman less than half his size. You said you didnât want his babies now, but just wait until heâd fucked you full of his cum once or twice. Youâd be begging him for it in no time at all, and shortly thereafter, heâd have you barefoot and pregnant as many times as he liked. Always swollen with one of his children and whining for more.
The woman before him now had a murderous glint in her eyes, but he could fuck that away easy. In fact, he would live to do it. He traced the outline of your thigh over your dress and smiled when you tried not to recoil.
âSurely you didnât think weâd be finger-painting and reading poetry to each other on our wedding night, hm?â he asked, almost delicately.
âThought you might have one of your other women lined up,â you snorted. When you tried to move away, Bucky pinched your leg to make you stay. You winced.
âThatâs not funny,â he said, a little more consternation in his tone. Like he actually cared whether you thought him a profligate Lothario or not, âNow that weâre married, itâs only you and me. No mistresses, nothing.â
Yeah, and he was just as likely arriving to your marital bed a blushing virgin. You rolled onto your side and pretended not to feel him tighten his grip as you did.
âTry the carnal part of our marriage yourself and Iâm sure youâll find Iâm an exceptional fuck,â Bucky continued, speaking low as he stroked the chiffon of your dress.
You didnât doubt the man was goodâcertainly the extent of his sexual escapades as a twenty-something seemed to demand itâbut exceptional? No fucking way. You knew men like Bucky, with the world and every walking pair of tits at their fingertips, and almost all were incurably selfish. Cocky. The kind to jackhammer a woman for three consecutive minutes, roll over, and say, âDid you cum?â
No, there was not a snowballâs chance in hell your husbandâs sexual prowess was even half as good as he claimed it was. Deciding to bite your tongue for the first time that night, though, you just stared at him blankly.
What you didnât know was that your silence only stoked the flames of his ego, prompting him to press the matter further.
âWhat? You think I canât fuck?â he said, âAny woman lucky enough to bed me has cum at least twice. Every time.â
Sure they did, Bucky, you wanted to say, but were suddenly drawn into his lap before you could speak.
âBut letâs pretend I canât,â he said, heedless of the face you made as soon as you were straddling his hips, âYou wouldnât let your husband prove himself tonight?â
âI donât fuck strangers.â
Bucky smiled at that.
âEveryoneâs a stranger until you get to blow them, honey,â he teased, squeezing your hips when you didnât seem amused at all. Then you let out a cry, feeling yourself thrown back on the mattress like a rag doll while Bucky moved off.
Before you knew it, he was tugging your ankles down the length of the bed and widening his stance just a bit. He stopped pulling once your knees were grazing his black dress pants and your feet were dangling off of the bed.
âYou like skylines?â he asked.
You frowned and raised a brow that he was quick to interpret as a âyes.â He hauled you onto your feet.
ââCourse you do. All pretty girls like pretty skies,â he rattled on, strolling with you step-by-step to the set of French doors at the end of the room.
Bucky led you out to the balcony. The air was warm as it ever was, dull gusts of the evening wind curling up from the coastline below. Just as your husband had promised, the skyline of Santorini greeted you on either side, and you had to admit, it was more than just pretty. The views from your villa were absolutely breathtaking.
You stood with your back to Bucky, hands resting on the marble balustrade, and you felt him there, behind you. You didnât bother to tilt your head when he drew even closer.
âWhat do you like most about it?â The question was simple enough, punctuated with a kiss on your shoulder. Your eyes scanned the horizon, the sea, even the quiet little streets down beneath, and you racked your brain trying to think of an answer that might satisfy him.
Before you could, though, you sucked in a breath when you felt your dress start to come undone at your back.
Bucky was unzipping your gown, gentle as ever, and probably grinning from ear to ear as he watched you shift uncomfortably in place and try to hold the material above your breasts where it had been fastened all day. Presently, you kicked your heel backward and hoped it would land somewhere near his balls. You missed.
âJames,â you hissed.
Bucky groaned at the sheer intonation of his name on your lips.
âYes, dear?â
âWhy are you undressing me?â
Bucky had successfully dragged the zipper all the way down to your ass, and it seemed he was trying to shimmy the dress off your frame. You held on tight.
âIâd like to fuck my bride over the balcony railing, if thatâs alright with you,â he answered truthfully.
The man was nothing if not blunt and crass. You turned around to give him a look, yanking your gown even closer to your chest.
âIâllâ Iâll tell my mother, Barnes.â
You felt stupid as soon as youâd said itâusing your go-to threat whenever you were in distress. What were you, eleven?
âYour mother?â Bucky repeated, words steeped in derision, âLast I recall, mommy dearest was practically begging me to get you pregnant at the reception.â
Your jaw clenched, and you internally cursed your whole family. Your parents were supposed to be on your side throughout all of thisâit was bad enough theyâd pawned you off to a mob boss of unrivaled infamy all to settle a debt, but this? Your mother had assured you just the day before that Mr. Barnes was bound to tire of you within the year. No mention of sex or babies whatsoever.
The same mother who had beat you over the head with the notion of your own virginity since you were old enough to read, the one who had underscored just how important it was to wait for the right man to give yourself body, mind, and soul to, turning around and telling this filthy criminal to have you any way he liked. And knock you up? The fucking nerve of that woman.
You were so preoccupied with thoughts of your own backstabbing family that you hardly felt Bucky drag your dress the rest of the way down your body. It was only when you were completely bare before him, and your husband had just started to skim his lips over your tummy that you tensed with surprise.
âI donât have to fuck you just yet, doll,â he murmured, having sunk to his knees and only moving lower. Then the corners of his lips twitched, âLeast not with my dick.â
You tried to pry his head from between your legs before he could stretch his tongue so much as an inch.
âJames!â
Again with that name.
âYou know, I love when you call me that, Mrs. Barnes.â
Bucky was peering up at you now, soaking in the sight of your body in a white lace bra, panties, and stockings.
âIs my bride feeling shy?â he teased, gently nipping at your inner thighs.
You werenât sure what you were feeling in that moment, to be honest. Revulsion, betrayal, arousal, you name itâeach crowned with an all-encompassing hatred for the man currently occupying the space between your legsâwhile a still stronger desire almost hoped he would stay.
âYou can hate your husband all you want and still let him tonguefuck you,â Bucky growled against your skin.
Like heâd read your mind.
In reality, your husband hardly needed the powers of telepathy to tell him just how turned on you were; the sopping wet spot in your panties said as much. From his vantage point, Bucky saw the disgust in your eyes slowly eclipsed by lust, and with a single flick of his tongue, he knew he would have you exactly where he wanted you.
âJust let it happen, honey.â
He felt your fingers thread tight through his hair and the first stir of your hips in tandem. One small, delectable whimper crossed your lips, and it took everything in Bucky not to tear your panties straight off with his teeth.
Instead, the man opted for a soft, gentle lick over your clothed slit. Testing the waters.
Your whimper was quick to meld to a moan, and then, just as fast:
âN-no, Bucky.â
To your dismay, his tongue didnât retreat, only making firmer laps against your centre while his lips grazed the lace. He gripped your thighs and wedged himself deeper, and again, you cursed the paper thin fabric of your panties for letting you feel everything his mouth was doing. He hadnât even made proper contact with your cunt, and your knees were already starting to shake.
He pressed a kiss above your clit through the flimsy material, and you almost tore a clump of hair from his head.
âNo. Please.â You hardly made sense to yourself; it was clear you wanted his touch, but something inside you wasnât quite ready to submit to the idea that this was all okay. That your husbandâs tongue and lips might be meant for something like this, and you didnât have to feel so guilty for wanting it either. Fucking purity culture.
âMy pretty girl,â Bucky presently murmured above the fabric, words sending a dozen little shockwaves in their wake, âMy beautiful fucking wife.â
The man inhaled your scent and couldâve sworn he was in ecstasy. Blinded by desire as he was, he really wasnât bullshitting in the slightest when he gathered you to him and said you were the best; heâd genuinely grown transfixed by the feel of you, in spite of every fibre of his being telling him not to. The marriage was arranged, fake, and fueled by hatredâand somehow, Bucky couldnât get enough.
Nor could he wait any longer. One light swipe of his finger tugged your panties aside, and then he was latching on, no cover this time, to take your clit between his lips. Sucking hard, going fast, needing it bad.
A moan rang loud in his ears, and your hand on his head was instantly joined by the other. You yanked his hair like you never had before, pulling so tight at the roots as though your pleasure depended on it. Bucky smiled around the soft pearl in his mouth and flicked it gently with the tip of his tongue.
âFeel good, baby?â he breathed.
His head tilted up to you, and he could see you were struggling just to breathe, face painted with a medley of emotions.
You didnât know if you could, or should, be feeling this good from a man so evil. Bucky flattened his tongue and licked a long stripe up your pussy to ensure that you would. Then he posed the question again, smirking.
âYou like my tongue on this wet, needy cunt?â
His words were so damn obscene, but you nodded anyway. Feeling small and powerless beneath those big, broad hands as they pinned you back on the marble and spread you even wider for the taking.
He loved how innocent and lewd you looked at once, wincing with pleasure and still trying to keep your composure like you thought a good girl should.
Bucky wanted to break that resolve. He brought one hand closer to your entrance.
And, just as your breaths were starting to hitch and grow more ragged in your chest, he pushed two fingers inside. The act surprised your husband almost as much as it did youânot quite, but almostâupon feeling how tight you were, how resistant to even two digits you seemed to be. He hardly knew whether to shove them deeper or pull them out, so fast did your muscles contract around him.
When you whined a loud, protracted, âFUCK!â he figured he would stick with the former. He grinned, having never heard you speak, much less swear, out of pleasure like this.
Your head lolled back and your body made an arch when his fingers curled inside you. You were panting, moaning, coating his hand with your juices, and Bucky knew you were close.
He started pumping his fingers in and out while his tongue worked your clit, chin practically doused in your arousal by now. A swell of pride rose within him: he could finally bring you home to that sweet release, have you a shaking, soaking mess above his face like you were wholly his and no one elseâs. He moved his tongue even faster and sank his fingers straight down to the knuckle.
Then, unexpectedly, both were robbed of your touch.
Seized with fear, you shoved Bucky off and stumbled away from his glistening face. You took off toward the doors and fled the balcony before you could think.
âWhat the fâ honey? Honey?!â Bucky sputtered. He bounded after you.
Youâd thrown yourself in the master bathroom and locked the door behind you in the blink of an eye. Outside, your husband had only to stare in pure bewilderment and awe, mind reeling at what had just happened.
Fucking hell, he knows. He knows! You collapsed against the door and slid down a couple inches. Your hand reflexively flew to your mouth to stifle the sounds when Bucky began pounding the wood behind you.
âBaby, whatâs wrong? Whatâsâwhatâs goinâ on?â
In truth, youâd rather chug bleach than divulge the thought that had just scared the everliving fuck out of you back there. It was stupid and senseless and shouldâve been frightening you for weeks before it ever came to this, but here you were, panicked in the bathroom of your honeymoon suite because youâd never done this beforeâand youâd never reached climax in your life without bursting into tears.
Fuck, you felt stupid. How could you think this would be any differentâor that Buckyâs tongue wouldnât eventually attempt to wrest an orgasm out of you?
Itâd just felt so good, you thought maybe a new climax brought by someone elseâs fingers might free you from the same unsavory demise youâd met a hundred times before, but then it hit you, shortly after Bucky had plunged his fingers inside, you were going to cry.
You winced when Buckyâs knocks grew louder, his voice gaining more ire by the second, it seemed.
âOpen the fucking door!â
Heâd rake you over the coals for this. Getting so close to what he wanted, only to have his silly little bride snatch it all away and run hiding in the en-suite bathroom? Your stomach turned at the thought of what men in the mob were liable to do with women like youâwhat Bucky might conceivably do now that youâd sparked his rage.
Your eyes darted to the window just as his fist shook the doorframe behind you. You ran over to the tub, tucked squarely beneath the windowsill, and climbed onto it just to get a hold of the fastenings around the glass.
One click synchronized with the furious cadence being hammered on the door, and just as you started to slide the pane up the way, a heavy thud sounded outside. The weight of your husbandâs body being thrust against the door, most likely.
You bit your lip and lifted one leg over the windowsill, shuffling your body even closer to the outside world.
Three floors up! Have you lost your mind? You could hear your fatherâs words ringing in your skull already. There was a ledge, you reasoned, no more than ten feet below, if you could just grab hold of the frame right there and slide down the cool stone you mightâ
âFuck,â Bucky groaned.
You watched your husband heave through the busted door of the bathroom, wide eyes and a âHereâs Johnnyâ flourish raging hot on his face. Your heart leapt to your throat, and you started to lower yourself out of the window, hoping desperately for that ledge below to be sturdy. But before you could make it even half of the way there, strong arms were circling your frame and yanking you back inside, hurtling straight into the bathtub with Bucky tumbling over you.
âWhat are you doing?!â he roared.
You wriggled under his weight, petrified of the fiery look in his eyes as he lurched over your frame.
He straightened up just enough to shake you by the shouldersâlike a parent reprimanding a child.
âWhat the fuck was that?! Huh? You think thatâs fucking funny, jumping out windows?â
No, no, not funny, you wanted to bite back, but found your mouth dry and unable to speak. When Bucky shook you again, you had only to whimper a pathetic sound.
The man was enraged. Stubble still damp with your juices and looking undeniably frazzled and spent, he drew closer to your face and demanded you look at him. When he took hold of your cheeks in both hands, the command couldnât have reached you any more clearly.
âWhatâ what was that for?â his voice lowered as he tried to catch his breath. You still couldnât move.
âI-I donâtââ you stopped and hardly knew how to say it:
Sorry to cut our tonguefucking session short, I was just afraid I might burst into a fit of uncontrollable tears while you licked and sucked me through the best orgasm of my life. Iâd rather jump off, or out of, a building than tell my mob boss husband that I canât cum without crying. By the way, Iâm a virgin!
Instead, you just blinked and stared back at him.
âCanâtâŠdo it,â you murmured.
Buckyâs expression only grew more puzzled by the words out of your mouth. He squeezed your face tighter and leaned in even closer.
âDo what? Sex? Fuck, Iâ I didnât mean to be that aggressive, hell, Iâm sorry.â He stopped to run a hand through his hair, and for the first time, you couldâve sworn you saw the first glint of compunction in his eyes.
He looked away a few seconds, as if collecting what fragmented thoughts he could, then brought his head back down to your level and took your hands in his.
âHoney?â he tried getting your attention, just barely above a whisper now, âI know the whole thingâs fucked, I know.â
That was the understatement of the century. To your surprise, Buckyâs gaze softened when he saw a scowl cross your face.
âWe donâtâŠhave to do anything. I was just pushing your buttons earlier. Being a dick.â
His tongue moved to wet his lips once more, this time without the seductive, smug demeanor he usually wore and simply exhibiting discomfort. He swallowed. The bow tie around his neck appeared to him to be fastened far too tight all of a sudden, and then, haphazardly, he started clawing at the garment to get it off.
You didnât know why you felt compelled to help. It was like all ten fingers just lifted of their own accord to join Buckyâs hands in trying to undo his tie.
The silk fabric wasnât tied, but knotted, crudely and inflexibly, beneath the little black bow. You frowned. Still unable to meet his gaze as you worked your fingers under the tangled material and tried to pretend like the two of you werenât still sweating profusely from the events that had just transpiredâboth the tonguefucking and the window-jumping.
âWho tied this, a five-year-old?â you muttered.
âIâm thirty-eight, thanks,â Bucky returned just as quietly.
Both of you indulged in a smile that lasted no longer than a second, but you felt the tension ease a little.
This was not where you thought your dreaded wedding night was headed before. Curled up in a bathtub with your hands around your husbandâs neckâand not actually trying to kill himâwhile Bucky blinked almost nervously the longer your hands lingered on his collar. It seemed heâd found something especially tantalizing on the wall behind your head, because his stare remained fixed on that spot the whole time you fiddled with his tie.
Maybe that, along with the last ebb of alcoholic influence from the reception still coursing through your veins, had emboldened you to come right out and say it while Bucky was looking away. You couldnât be sure.
âIâve never had sex before.â
At last, the tie loosened a little.
Bucky flicked his gaze back to yours in a second.
âWhat?â
You lifted a brow, wondering if he really needed an explanation as to what it meant to have never gotten laid before, but you decided against indulging him any further. Bucky seemed keen on doing that all by himself.
âYouâre a virgin?â
You nodded.
âDidnât my overbearing mother make sure you knew?â
âYeah, I thought she was full of shit,â Bucky answered bluntly. Then, catching sight of the semi-offended look in your eye, mixed with a tad more amusement than indignation, he added, âI meanâ I didnât think youâd, uh, wanna waitâŠtwenty-five years for some action.â
He winced when he realized that sounded just as bad. His throat cleared shortly to make way for a new attempt at comity, but you cut him off, shaking your head as you finally got the knot to untangle.
âNo, I get it. I donât know why I waited this long either,â you shrugged.
As soon as youâd freed him from his bow tie, you started to stand from the bath tub. Bucky, too, straightened to his full height and started to close the window while you walked back to the bedroom.
You eyed the rose petals strewn across the duvet and felt a little more relaxed this time around. The weight of the V-word had been lifted from your shoulders, and now you had only to share the crying-while-cumming stuff to Bucky later on. Much later on, you hoped.
You crawled onto the bed and stretched out on your belly, playing with the soft red petals and wondering if room service was still offered at this hour.
Bucky had just stepped out of the bathroom when he halted at the threshold. Saw your body sprawled out on the bed, back arched and ass pointed in the air as you reached over for the phone on the nightstand. He stared for a second too long and felt a familiar stir in his pants.
Sonovabitch, he started to think, before chiding himself silently, Shut up, man, sheâs a virgin. Be cool. Be coolâdonât make her jump out a window again.
He ducked back in the bathroom and eased the door to just a crack while you discovered a voice on the line:
âHi! Hey, Iâd like to order room service to, uhâŠâ your voice trailed off. Then, covering the mouthpiece, âJames, whatâs our room number?â
Inside the bathroom, Bucky squeezed his eyes shut at the sound of his name. Already palming his erection through his dress pants as he leaned against the wall.
âWe rented the whole building, dear,â he called back.
âOh.â He could just imagine the slight pout on your lips as you spoke. Then you asked if he wanted anything to eat, Bucky thought only of the sweet nectar between your legs, and he answered aloud, no, he was fine, really.
For the first time in his life, the man felt positively ashamed he was about to rub one out in a bathroom, alone. It wasnât like this was the first it had ever been done, but now there was you, innocent and oblivious in the next room over, while Bucky undid his belt and quietly freed his cock from his dress pants. It felt kind of perverted, in a way, but he knew he needed this release to put his mind at ease and not feel so affected by you.
While you scanned your phone for a menu and chatted with the concierge downstairs about various food items, Bucky was spitting in his hand and fumbling for his shaft. You talked American Wagyu sirloin, lobster thermidor, and seared Faroe Island salmon while he thought achingly about the way your cunt had tasted and how badly he wanted to try it again.
How did he feel about an artisan cheese platter? Bucky hardly had the wits about himself to answer beyond a strangled, âWhatever you want, honeyâ and a tightened fist around his cock, stroking hard to get the filthy thoughts out of his head before the food arrived.
Ever sweet, soft, supple, and savoryâhis mind reeled with fresh memories of that place between your thighs, and he almost lurched forward in pleasure.
Your brute of a mob boss husband was irreparably pussy-whipped and hadnât even fucked you yet. He gripped the bathroom sink beside him and sincerely wished it wasnât his hand doing the work right now. But of course, he had to be patient, had to be kindâcouldnât force himself on a woman who clearly wasnât ready.
Again, he spit in his palm and jerked himself fast.
Any minute now, he thought with some relief.
Your feet padded softly into the living room as the pleasure inside him was starting to crest. Still pining for your warmth and the way your legs trembled around his head, Bucky was all but fucking his hand at this point. Heâd snagged his bottom lip between his teeth in a lopsided smile and groaned, too low to be heard, and pumped himself even faster for his impending orgasm.
A thought crossed your mind as you stopped ahead of the sofa. You pivoted.
Suddenly, you were skipping back to the bathroom, wanting to know Buckyâs wine preferences before you placed another order.
You barged in and froze.
âSorry!â you squeaked, darting out just as fast.
Five seconds slower and you probably wouldâve seen Bucky blow his load all over the sink. As it was, the man was left sorely at a loss for any form of release and heaving fast, ragged breaths from the colossal scare youâd just given him.
Good fucking going, Buckâyour wife wants to cuddle and eat cheese and youâre out here beating your meat.
Bucky shoved himself back in his pants and waited an excruciating minute for the sound of your second window exit of the night. A slammed door, a frantic phone call, a few sobs into your pillow as you realized how dirty and depraved your husband was, anything.
He was only met with silence.
Taking one more shaky breath, Bucky reached for the doorknob and started back out. Cautiously.
The man took his slow, silent leave of the bathroom with his gaze trained toward the doorsâhalf-expecting to see his bride rappelling from the balconyâbut then quickly shifted to the bed. Finding you kneeling at the edge.
âJames?â
Your voice almost pained.
A word was all it took. Bucky was back on his knees.
âIâm sorry. I just wanted it to go away, honey. Iâm sorry.â
Go away? You quirked a brow and couldnât hold his gaze much longer; just trailed your vision down his torso to his pants, then his erection, still standing prominent as ever.
Bucky struggled to decide whether you were ticked off or intrigued, seeing your eyes make their painful appraisal of his length beneath his pants. Your brow was pinched, but your head was cocked. Almost curious.
âAre you mad at me?â you asked, gaze fixed on the spot.
Immediately, Bucky rose to his feet and crawled back on the bed, seizing your body with both of his hands.
âNo! No, not mad at all,â he mumbled as he sidled up beside you. Pleased to see you hadnât recoiled, âI was just, uhâŠmissing you, âsâall.â
If his men could see him now, Bucky was sure heâd be the laughing stock of all the town. Doting and kind, eyes softened beyond recognition, he just watched you and wanted nothing more than to repair the smile that had ebbed from your face. Come ridicule, hell, or high water, the man was infatuated with his brideâall broken plates and attempted window escapes be damned.
Presently, you brought your hand down to his bulge.
Bucky stiffened but didnât speak. He wanted you to do this on your own, of your own volition.
âYou seem kinda mad to me.â You hardly knew what you were doing. Just rubbing his length and hoping it was something heâd like.
Where Bucky had wanted to see you smile, you just wanted to hear him grunt and whineâmaybe grab your hips and beg you to do something, please. Youâd never felt any such degree of control, and you suspected Bucky had never not felt it himself. You wanted him desperate.
You were playing a dangerous game, you knew it, but something inside those baby blues said he wanted to do it, too. Do anything for you, quite frankly.
You watched the rise and fall of Buckyâs broad chest and stroked his length even softer.
âJames.â
âUh-huh?â His mouth hung open with a gentle grunt, fighting every instinct to buck into your touch.
At last, you squeezed his shaft and prodded him on. Let your head drift closer to his so his lips would graze the apple of your cheek, and just when you sensed he wanted a taste, you tilted your face toward his own,
âWe havenât even kissed since the ceremony.â
Bucky stared blankly at you, enrapt with the pulse of your fingers. You could tell he was aching to move.
âOh yeah?â he murmured.
You nodded a wordless affirmation and slid sharply back in bed as Bucky lunged after you. Your hands flew from his pants to the plush mattress behind you as you shiftedâor, rather, scrambledâback in place and felt your husband climb over you hungrily.
âThat what my wife wants?â he murmured, frame slotting tight between your legs.
You nodded again, and had only to suck in a breath before Bucky was devouring your lips. The kind of flushed, frantic, filthy kiss that wouldâve doubtlessly wrought looks of horror on every face at your wedding had he grabbed you that way after the declarations of âI doâ had been spoken.
You loved him like this, impassioned and a bit unhinged.
His tongue worked his way past your lips and scoured every soft, fleshy inch between the insides of your cheeks before he took your face in his hands, kissing you roughly.
Something hard and throbbing nudged your sex, and suddenly you were whining in his mouth. Wrapping your legs around his waist.
âAh, honey, donât,â Bucky groaned, visibly straining to contain himself. When you dug your heels even deeper in his back, the groan that followed from him was hoarse and guttural.
âI thoughtâ IâŠfuck,â your husband turned his head to curse as you grinded your hips up to his. You had to bite back a smile.
âI just wanna do what married people do,â you murmured coyly, pretending not to see when Bucky shot you the most red-hot, wanton look heâd imparted all evening.
âYeah?â Like a kid in a candy shop the size of Sears.
Bucky took your face in his hands once more and made sure to scan your expression for any shred of doubt. On finding nothing there, he sat panting, half-disbelieving and half-contemplating all the wretched things he wanted to do to you. You squeezed his sides with your thighs and just hoped your husband knew what to do, because, in truth, you didnât have the first fucking idea.
A few dry, clinical terms flashed before your mindâs eye, along with your motherâs bleak depiction of what treatment lay in store for a woman on her wedding night, and as Bucky started to work his belt and his pants off, you just hoped he wouldnât be cruel.
He couldnât be, right? Heâd only mowed down a hundred men and dismembered dozens more, you were told, but surely a set of eyes this soft, caring, and kind couldnât belong to a monster. You let him lift your hips and shimmy your panties, garter belt, and stockings down your legs, and when he returned, you tried your best not to betray the thoughts in your head.
Bucky hadnât been with a virgin for as long as he could rememberâmaybe ever. His own âdefloweringâ an ancient relic of his boyhood and the multitude of partners since then a mere flurry of nameless faces, he sincerely couldnât recall a time when heâd asked, or cared, whether the woman beneath him had her cherry intact. He didnât suppose it could be too different, as he peeled the last pieces of your lingerie set off your body and saw you seemed perfectly ready. He ran a finger between your folds and felt you shiver with what looked like excitement. Piece of cake, he thought, smiling.
No doubt he would take great joy in making you his own. His bride, his wife, an unblemished beacon of light in a life as sordid as his, looked perfect spread before him. You would adjust to his size. Bucky trailed the head of his cock up your slit and coated himself in your juices, and just when heâd bracketed his other arm around your head on the pillow, you let out a small sound.
âAre you sure itâll fit?â
Bucky fisted his length and pressed the tip to your entrance.
âUhâŠyeah. Yeah, I think so.â
He hadnât yet met a woman who wasnât able to fit him.
âOkay.â
Somehow, your voice sounded even smaller, head lodged between pillows and the crook of Buckyâs elbow. You felt small. Frankly, it didnât seem like your husband was quite computing the worries that were pervading your brain, but you decided he knew bestâyour mother had assured you that husbands always didâand when Bucky first pressed the head of himself to the seam of your cunt, you hardly even whimpered.
You watched his brow furrow above you. He tried to go further.
Your folds were as soaked as heâd ever seen a womanâs, your hole practically pulsing with desire, and somehow, he couldnât push in.
Bucky snagged his lip between his teeth and braced himself with the aid of the headboard, taking your hip in his other hand. A breath sounded on your lips the second he adjusted, and shortly thereafter, he felt your gaze on the same place he was watching: the spot where your bodies were trying to connect.
His features darkened at the prospect of failing, or even appearing incompetent to you in the slightest. Heâd done this hundreds of times before, why wouldnât it work?
When he felt your eyes trail back up his body and study his faceâmaybe wondering why her new groom hadnât gotten around to thrusting into her yet, he thoughtâhe felt a swell of panic and pushed.
Against his better judgment and the feel of your body, he muscled his way through and forced his cock inside. Bottoming out in a single, stabbing thrust.
You seized in pain but wanted to be a good wife for him.
Bucky, too, felt his hips stutter at the resistance your walls were giving him, but then remembered how heâd sworn to be a dutiful husband, and kept going.
Together, you stared anywhere but the otherâs face and gritted your teeth for two entirely different reasonsâyou, in agony, and Bucky, in ecstasy, the latter hoping with everything in him that you liked this as much as him.
Bucky took a tender, if not slightly awkward, rhythm rutting against your body and stared steady at the headboard like he always did.
You were in pain and faced with nothing but his hulking chest, moving up and down, back and forth, over and over again like a goddamn seesaw from hell while it felt like your insides were presently being torn to shreds.
Who fucking enjoys this? you wanted to wail, but feigned a moan instead, raking your nails down Buckyâs back, Why isnât he looking at me? Why isnât he touching me?
Your walls involuntarily clenched around him, and he swallowed a moan.
Just think of baseball, beer, math, the Roman Empire, anything to keep from busting right now, Bucky told himself as he clenched his jaw and fought to maintain his pace. Your pussy just felt so. fucking. good.
Beneath him, you had tried and failed to fight back tears. The burn was just too much; the longer he thrusted, the more your walls contracted, and confusingly, stupidly, it seemed like he was using you. Your mother was right, most likely, that sex was just a means to an end for men like Bucky, and your husband didnât care about your pleasure at all. You fought hard to keep the waterworks at bay, that one thing you hadnât wanted Bucky to see, but eventually, the tears were flowing freely.
You stifled a sob that your husband mistook for a moan.
He fucked you even faster and felt a grin start to twitch at the corners of his lips when you made a sound that seemed consistent with pleasure.
âFeel so fucking tight,â Bucky grunted, about to lower his gaze to your face for the first time since heâd entered you, âSo nice and tight and wâhey, hey, baby?â
He stilled inside as soon as he saw that you were crying. Took your face in his hands and almost couldnât believe the sight of your tear-stained cheeks beneath him.
âWhatâs wrong? What happened?â he asked, scanning your face for any signs of harm.
You just shook your head and tried to brush him off.
âKeep going, Iâm good.â
Bucky seemed angered at the suggestion. He brought your face closer to his and stared almost reproachfully down at you. Then he paused a beat and swiped one of your cheeks with the pad of his thumb.
âAm I hurting you?â he asked.
âNââ
âDonât lie.â
You squirmed a bit and winced. That was answer enough for Bucky, and he slowly pulled out of you.
âAw hell.â
The two of you glanced down to see a blooming red spot on the comforter. Bucky rubbed the blood in disbelief.
Heâd gone too far. Again. Hurt something inside of you that couldnât be fixed with a kiss. While you struggled to sit up among the pillows, Bucky was running a hand through his hair and cursing himself up and down.
âWhy didnât you say something?â he scowled.
âI didnât wanna interrupââ
âIf Iâm making you bleed, you stop me, for fuckâs sake.â
âWell you seemed to be having a pretty good time!â
Bucky didnât need to tell you in words what was painted on his face; he was pissed off and probably bound to slip off the bed any second, when your tears started welling up again. Then he eased off, remembering he was more mad at himself than anyone else, and slid closer to you. He tried pulling you into his chest, but you didnât budge.
âCâmon,â you said, grabbing his wrist, âLetâs keep going.â
Bucky eyed you incredulously.
âNuh-uh.â
âUh-huh,â you insisted. He shot you a glare but didnât protest when you guided his hand between your legs.
You were spread back open for him in no time. Still stinging like hell and ready for another go. Bucky almost couldnât believe it.
âMy headstrong wife.â He managed a smile before kissing the crown of your head, and kept right on kissing that spot no matter how far his fingers were traveling.
âYou owe me two orgasms, remember, Mr. Barnes?â
It seemed Buckyâs boastful claims of late were in fact the furthest thing from his mind as he crawled back over your body. He pried your knees apart and left just enough room for his frame, taking his fingers to your folds and rubbing in light, gentle circles.
The bleeding had stopped. What little remained was long forgotten, and duly, the pain from recent memory was slowly but surely purged with every flick of his thumb. Bucky planted an arm next to your head and kept touching you there until your face relaxed completely.
When he chanced a finger inside, he was careful not to rub so much as plunge in quick, shallow motions, and at the first signs of pleasure, press light and tender kisses on your skin.
âIf it hurts at all, you tell me.â
He sounded stern as he inserted another finger, but really, the man was all putty in your hands, wanting to please you and tease you in any way that he could.
When you told him faster, he sped up; you gripped his hair and said slow down, he did the same. He curled his digits in time with every whimper and moan you made and took care not to be too harsh on your sweet spot.
The only time he paused was when you looked up and asked him point-blank: could he fuck you sweet and gentle now?
Bucky paused. Swallowed.
The man wouldâve screwed you six ways to Sunday if you asked him; that wasnât the problem. The only traces of hesitation remained where your eyes said something different. Even as he shuffled between your legs at your behest, aligned his cock with your entrance, and felt a wave of desire wash over him, he pressed his forehead to yours and searched your glossy gaze once more.
âYou sure about this, bunny?â he murmured.
Your heart melted at the name. You couldnât deny you were frightened, and perhaps a bit worse for the wear after your last attempt, but his words were a comfort, his hand on your cheek a welcome gesture. When his thumb grazed your lips, you kissed it and nodded.
âAlright sweet girl,â Bucky said, tone laced with affection.
This time, before pressing the head of himself inside, Bucky caught your lips and kissed you softly. Rubbed himself up and down your slitâpaying extra attention to your clitâand coated himself completely before trying to penetrate you again.
Your cheeks flushed, and you kissed him harder.
âP-please, Bucky, fuck me,â you murmured against his mouth, eliciting a small grunt from him.
âYeah? You want your husbandâs cock inside you, doll?â He kept the pretense of teasing, but really, he was just trying to make sure you wanted this as badly as he did. By the blissed out look on your face and the soft, ceaseless squelching noises produced by your arousal, he got the message pretty quickly.
He breached your folds with just the tip at first. You both felt your muscles contract. Instead of blindly pushing ahead like he had before, Bucky trained his gaze on your face and watched for any signs of discomfort.
âEverything okay, bunny?â he hummed as he brushed a few strands of hair from your face.
You were half in awe of how attentive he was, and doubly impressed by the stretch that followedâlike a pinch, but nothing like the pain youâd felt before. You peered up at your husband and squeezed his shoulders.
âItâ it doesnât hurt this time,â you said, breathless.
Bucky couldâve caved at the sweet, innocent expression aloneâlike you were pleasantly surprised this hadnât caused excruciating painâand his lips moved down to pepper your cheeks with kisses again.
âDoll, Iâm so sorry.â
The sounds and sighs of your pleasure beneath him, along with the words telling him it was okay, really, he hadnât meant to do it, all made him feel even guiltier for having hurt you in the first place. It took him some time assailing your face with tiny, apologetic kisses before he even thought to feed you another inch.
When he finally plunged himself deeper, it wasnât without your express permission; even then, Bucky feared he might split you in two.
The whole time he eased himself inside, he was moving his gaze between your face and the place between your two bodiesâwatching you open for him and take him inch by inch. He rubbed his thumb over your clit when you whimpered.
âDoing so good for me.â
âStretching so nice for this cock.â
âMy beautiful, beautiful wife.â
Every syllable of his praises flooded your head like honey. Feeling him stretch you out, fill you up, and rock you softly with his first shallow thrusts, all while talking you through it, had your mind ablaze and near-euphoric.
Pleasure practically searing your veins, you didnât even hear yourself, or really mean to say it, as soon as you did.
âThis doesnât feel dirty at all.â
An epiphany to you and a puzzle to Bucky.
âWhatâsâat, honey?â He was still rutting his hips and slowly picking up speed. Your husband groaned when you clenched around him and pulled him even deeperâbefore you realized what youâd said.
Your cheeks flushed.
âIâ I was always told sex made you dirty. This feelsââ you stopped to swallow a moan when Bucky grazed a particularly sensitive spot inside you, âpretty nice.â
âPretty nice.â Your husband couldnât help the smile twitching at the corners of his lips as he leaned down to kiss you. He wrapped his big, muscly arms around you and pulled you closer to his chest.
âMakes you dirty?â Bucky said, disbelief evident in his tone before his smile broke into a grin, âBaby, youâre the cleanest, sweetest thing Iâve ever seen.â
He didnât let you endeavor to protest, just buried his face in your neck and pressed teasing kisses all over the skin while he continued to pump in and out of you. He knew to keep hitting that spot, too.
You were drowning in whimpers and kisses when Bucky brought his lips to your ear.
âDoesnât make you dirty at all,â he assured you, âJust makes you my wife.â
You clawed Buckyâs back when he sped up a little, and you felt the pleasure soar to even greater heights when he propped your legs above his shouldersâa brand new angle for him to bend you like a pretzel and fuck you good.
âYou take this cock too nice to be dirty,â he gritted his teeth and continued to soothe you just how he knew you liked it, âSuch a good little wife, sucking up every inch of me like you were made for it.â
Your lips parted in a soft âo,â feeling him plunge the depths of your cunt like he never had before. Bucky slipped his thumb in your mouth while he held your face.
âThat what you are, bunny? A good girl?â
You nodded your head and sucked his thumb, feeling yourself fucked dumb as you did. Bucky loved that blissed out look in your eyes.
âGood girl for daddy?â he cooed.
Your ankles trembled around his neck as soon as he said it. You nodded again, yes, you were, and felt a light coil start to form in your lower stomach as Bucky kept pounding you and pushing his thumb between your lips.
Then, with a pop, he plucked the digit from your mouth and brought it down to your clit. He started soft at first, but before long he was rubbing vicious circles on that little bundle of nerves, watching you come undone before his eyes and clench around him even tighter.
âB-Bucky,â you whined, fisting the sheets underneath you both as you squirmed.
âMhmm?â Your husband pretended to be oblivious.
âI wâ Iâm gonnaââ The words could scarcely leave your lips without finding themselves punctured with a whimper as soon as they were spoken. Bucky thrusted harder.
âGonna what? Cum for daddy?â he grinned, âMake a mess all over this cock?â
Your moans of pleasure more than sufficed for an answer. You nodded and winced, felt your whole lower half seize with a warm and heady feeling, and before you knew it, Buckyâs thrusts were sending you spiraling over the edge, with a wave of bliss following shortly behind. Sounds of skin slapping skin hardly faltered, and Bucky kept rubbing and fucking you all throughout the waves of your high.
Tears sprung to your eyes, and you didnât care. Your mind was alight with more bright, fervid feelings than you could count or comprehend, and your body washed over with pleasure.
You clung to Bucky and felt him keep fucking you, even as you shrieked against his skin.
âOne more for me, honey.â
You didnât think that was possible. You had just spilled all over him, squeezing his cock like a vice and screaming his name, and now he wanted it all over again? So soon?
Your fingernails sunk into his arms as he continued to rut into you, and you started to shake your head.
âC-Canât Bucky, I canât, I canât,â you sobbed, tears still streaming down your cheeks.
âSure you can.â
Your husband had his mouth at your ear again, panting as the pace of his thrusts grew faster. He tilted his body slightly forward so your legs were pushed even higher above youâdamn near grazing either side of your headâand pounded you relentlessly.
His voice seemed so calm and assured as he spoke,
âCum for daddy. Show me just how fucking good this cock makes you feel and cum again for me.â
With a command like that, how could you refuse?
You came a second time, hands seizing Bucky's forearms, and screams tearing through your chest as you rode your high impaled on his cock over and over again. The sights and sounds and repeated, pulsing spasms of your pussy on his shaft sent Bucky chasing his release not long after, and you felt a warmth spread inside you.
Your eyes were filled to the brim with tears, your cheeks practically drenched already. As you came down from your high, you started to blink.
But just as you lifted a hand to sop up the moisture, Bucky was leaning over you and into you with the brightest smile. Then he was kissing each wet, salty stain like it was the most natural thing in the world, sponging soft and gentle touches all over the spots your tears had overflown.
It seemed every nerve ending in your lower half was on the fritz, your body little more than mush underneath him, but somehow you managed to catch his mouth as he traversed the skin. You kissed him back, and Bucky drew you closer.
The two of you separated for a second, Buckyâs cock still resting comfortably inside you and his broad frame engulfing you in bed. He paused a beat. Seemed to consider something in his mind before speaking aloud.
âHoney,â he started, unsure of how he wanted to say this.
You peered up at him, curious. His seed had filled every contour and crevice of your aching walls and was just then starting to dribble out of you. Bucky seemed unfazed. He cupped both hands around your face.
âI love you.â
You blinked. No fucking way you were hearing those words.
âWhat?â You felt too awestruck to say anything else.
âI love you,â Bucky repeated. A smile was starting to tug at his lips, his thumb tracing your cheek while you stared at him in disbelief.
You wouldâve liked to speak.
Wouldâve loved to say those three little words right back.
In fact, you had just opened your mouth to tell him that, when a sound at the foot of the bed startled you both.
The warm glow of moonlight pouring in from the window panes was your only means to see it. But sight wasnât worth much at all when a man appeared and pressed the barrel of a gun to Buckyâs temple, letting out a chuckle.
Another man, clad head-to-toe in polished black tactical gear approached from the far end of the room. Bucky gritted his teeth but remained motionless, hearing that man cock his firearm as well. You were surrounded on either side of the bed. Your blood ran cold.
âSorry to interrupt the fun, Mr. Barnes,â the man on the left spoke so low and gruff he could scarcely be heard.
When Bucky started to stir, the man on the right raised his pistol as well. Curled his finger on the trigger.
âWe havenât even met your beautiful bride.â A set of cruel, glinting teeth turned in your direction. Suddenly, all eyes were trained on youâalong with a third handgun, pointed at your head, as another man approached.
âWedded bliss treating you well so far, Mrs. Barnes?â
#bucky barnes#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#marvel#mcu#mob bucky barnes#marvel smut#marvel x reader#james buchanan barnes#james bucky barnes#mob!bucky#mob!bucky barnes#mob bucky#mafia!bucky#mafia bucky barnes
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a/n:Â some time ago i asked you guys on a poll what dude you wanted in this story and you all chose bucky, so here it is! also, i partly blame you all for how unhinged it turned out... like you get maybe 6,69% of the blame for the push you gave me... the rest is just me being a hoe
summary:Â a tale of the three times a nurse was kidnapped by new yorkâs most notorious gang.Â
warnings:Â dark!mob boss!bucky barnes x nurse!reader x doctor!peter parker, smut, dark content, noncon/dubcon, mob au, mobsters!steve rogers, clint barton, tony stark, scott lang, bruce banner, the gang is called the avengers, doctor!kate bishop, enemies to lovers, kidnapping, violence, weapons, blood, being drugged, alcohol consumption, possessiveness, kissing, clothed x completely naked, panty sniffing, dirty talk, manhandling, size kink, gaping, belly bulge, oral, fingering, fisting, pussyjob, in bucky's mind it's brat taming, dumbification, impact play, squirting, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, somno, bondage, mild knife play, mild gunplay, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, creampie, cumplay
word count: 11.574
⌠gentle reminder that feedback, but especially reblogs are the way you support writers on here âœ
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You flinched jaggedly as the dark cloth bag was finally ripped off your head. Eyes immediately squinting, they still strained to take in the unfamiliar space youâd been dragged to.Â
You were no longer in the hospitalâs dark parking lot, nor were you in the black van youâd suddenly been tossed into, but instead, you found yourself in a dark living room. It was elegantly decorated, from the Persian rug to the dramatic, antique fireplace flicking behind the cluster of suit-clad criminals glaring down at you.Â
âThis her?â one of them grumbled.Â
âYep, one doctor as per your request,â the one whoâd abducted you grinned, proudly planting a palm on his hip, âeven choose a pretty one just for shits and giggles,â his starkly different mannerisms only made the others seem that much more intimidating.Â
The broad-figured one with a shock of sandy hair then stepped closer to where you stood, âalright, hereâs the thing, doc,â his head tilted slightly to get on your level as he spoke to you directly, âyouâre gonna do exactly as we say and then everything will be alright, okay?â he stared in your eyes as you offered him a shaky nod, âokay,â he exhaled, âyou got a name?â
âY/n Y/l/nâŠâ you uttered before hearing yourself try to correct, âbut IââŠâ
âBut what?â the same man croaked.Â
âI-Iâm not a doctorâŠâ
âGod damn it!â someone rumbled as everyoneâs eyes flicked to the man whoâd captured you, âwe canât fucking trust the new guy to do anything.â
âWell, sheâs wearing scrubs,â he tried, frantically gesturing to your uniform, âI just thoughtââ
âYou fucked up, Lang!â the first man who youâd heard speak barked loudly, âand now weâre not just gonna lose one of our brothers tonight, but also the head of the snake. Great fucking job,â a sharp click then caused your eyes to find the gun he yanked out, âand now she gotta die as wellââ
âWait!â you shrieked as both of your palms shot up in the air, âno! Please donât kill me! I-Iâm a nurse! Iâm a nurse! I can help! Whoeverâs hurt, I can help!â
Seemingly superior to the others present, the blonde one stared at you intensely for a while before exhaling a verdict, âshit⊠well, I guess itâs better than nothingâŠâ his polished shoes then began to shuffle before he gestured to you, âcome this way.âÂ
Hesitantly, you slowly shadowed him out of the living room, down a dim hallway, and into the chamber that bloomed at the bottom of the corridor. In the centre of the dark room, bathed by two glowing pendants, stood a large pool table, and upon the green felt, with colourful orbs haphazardly scatted all about, there laid a man, unconscious and bleeding.Â
The brunetteâs suit was sodden with crimson, though you couldnât tell from here how much of it was his own.Â
The gangster who was standing by the side and watching over the wounded individual glanced up at your arrival and asked his fellow men, âthis the doctor?âÂ
âNo, itâs a fucking stripper,â you twisted your neck at the sarcastic tone as the guy whoâd only moments ago pulled a gun on you waltzed past you and entered the room as well, âyes, of course it is, Tony. Howâs the boss?â
âStill alive,â he answered in a sigh and cast his glance back down upon the man on the pool table.Â
Slowly stepping up, you carefully let your stare wash over the mobster, from the frazzled and blood-soaked attire to the metal-looking hand poking out one of the sleeves.Â
âWhat happened?â you asked carefully.Â
âMiss,â someone grumbled as they set a bag of supplies down beside you on the games table, âjust fix him.âÂ
âIf you wanna give your friend a better chance, then you give me as much information as possible about what happened to him,â you uttered as you found a pair of gloves and slipped them on.Â
Letting out a sigh, the blonde fellow then said, âit was a shootout.â
Snatching up a pair of scissors, you began to snip in the manâs clothes, staring at the sleeve closest to you, âhow many times was he shot?â
âI donât know, heâ⊠a lot of rounds went off,â he grunted, the events of the night weighting his broad shoulders down, âI wasnât exactly counting.âÂ
Two bullets. Thatâs how many you found when his dress shirt was in tatters on the floor. One was lodged in his right arm four finger widths above his elbow, while the other had strayed a bit further north and buried itself in his bulky bicep. You also found other scrapes and scratches along his torso, assumingly from other bullets that hadnât been as lucky as those two.Â
The smallest of relieved sighs flowed from your lungs as you discovered that he wasnât in a critical enough condition to be in need of a surgeon, at least not from what you could tell with the limited resources currently at your disposal.Â
As you carefully set to work, first digging the bullets out before cleaning the wounds with saline, your lips slowly parted as you treaded a curved needle, ââŠso, not that I donât love the change to my evening plans,â you didnât dare shift your glance as you asked, âbut donât you have a regular guy for cleaning up these sorts of messes?âÂ
âWe did⊠he died tonight, trying to stop that from happening,â the blonde man gestured to the injuries you began to stitch up.Â
Blinking up to find his eye, you uttered sincerely, âIâm so sorry for your lossâŠâ feeling yourself, even under such circumstances, uncontrollably slip into those compassionate parts of your profession.Â
A slight scoff bubbled out of the gangster, taken aback by your unexpected gentleness, âyeah, me too. Banner was one hell of a guyâŠâ
Once each of the wounds were sutured closed and youâd bandaged him up, you pushed yourself back from the pool table.Â
âAlright,â you exhaled and glanced up at the criminals lurking in the shadows of the chamber, âIâm done.â
âYeah?â one of them stepped up to get a better look, âheâs alright?â
âNo, heâs not alright, he was shot multiple times and should be in a fucking hospital,â your eyes briefly fluttered shut as you heard yourself snap, ânow, can I please go home?âÂ
Catching the eye of the blonde one, second in command, you watched as his jaw briefly clenched, the muscles dancing beneath his skin before he breathed, âno, youâre not done.â
âBut I did exactly as you askedââ
âLike you said, he should be in a hospital right now, but we canât have that happen, so instead, youâre gonna stay here till heâs out of the woods.âÂ
âWhat? I canâtââ
âYouâre a nurse, right?â he croaked to shut you up, âso fucking do your job and nurse him back to health.â
Three whole days ended up passing by before Mr Barnes slowly began to regain consciousness.Â
âOh, youâre awake!â you snapped back into work mode, springing from your seat and leaning in over the bed which heâd previously been moved into. As the mobster instinctively began to sit up, his eyes barely open yet, you laid a soft palm upon his metal arm and uttered, âsir, please donât move,â and watched as his clenched jaw almost silenced a groan, âone second, Iâll give you something for the pain,â before you shifted a moment to scavenge through the supplies youâd been given. Once the medicine was found, you exhaled slowly as you injected it, gently pressing down the plunger of the syringe, âthere you goâŠâÂ
You let yourself suck in a deep breath before your sharp eyes washed over him, briefly assessing him as he woke, though as your gaze flickered up to meet his own, initially with the intent of checking his pupillary response, the manner he stared back at you caught you so of guard that a shiver trickled down your spine. Â
âSir, do you know what your name is?â you asked in a clear tone.Â
âMhmâŠâ he hummed and continued to stare at you as if you were an angel, âBuckyâŠâÂ
âBucky, great, thatâs good,â you nodded, âand do you know where you are?â
His gaze didnât shift away from your visage as he then murmured, âheavenâŠâ
âNo, I assure you, youâre not dead,â grasping the stethoscope draped around your neck, you shifted it into place to take a quick listen to his heart, âyou almost were, a few times, but you arenât.âÂ
As the steady thumping of his pulse filled your ears and seeped into your soul, his deep voice washed over you once again and layered atop the beat, âIâm guessing you had something to do with that?âÂ
Catching his unwavering eye a moment, you then averted yours and muttered, âI was just doing my jobâŠâ before retracting the stethoscope from his chest and casting your glance towards the door, âI should probably go tell the others that youâre awake.âÂ
TWO WEEKS LATER
ââŠand Mr Jensen in 401 is complaining of a headache, so you might wanna check that out as well.âÂ
âAlright, cool,â the doctor scribbled down the last of your words on the little notepad in his palm before his gaze flickered up to catch yours, âthank you so much, Y/n,â he flashed you a warm smile.Â
Mirroring his expression, you hugged the charts in your grasp closer to your chest, âany time, Dr Parker.âÂ
âPeter, please,â his thumb extended to click the top of his blue pen before sliding it into the breast pocket of his white coat, âhey, I was gonna go grab a cup of coffee right now, do you wanna join?â he tried to keep his tone casual.Â
Blinking back at him, your breath couldnât help but get caught in your throat, âIâ, uhm⊠Iâd love to, but I get off in a little bit. Wednesdays are always just morning shifts for me.âÂ
âOh, alright,â he nodded understandingly, though the gentle rejection still tainted his features slightly.Â
âBut another time,â you offered, successfully brightening his smile once more.Â
âYeah?â his elbow curled up to lean against the supportive railing that lined the hospital hallways.Â
âSure. I mean, I drink coffee, you drink coffee,â you awkwardly began to dig yourself into a hole, âthe chances of us bumping into each other at the coffee cart are pretty highââÂ
But your sentence was then cut short as Peterâs pager suddenly pinged in his pocket.
Fishing the small device out, his eyes flickered down to the small screen before he croaked, âoh, sorry. I gotta run.â
âOf course,â you swiftly waved a hand and watched as his feet began to shuffle into a run.Â
âTalk later!â Peter called over his shoulder before he rounded a corner and disappeared into the maze of the hospital.Â
Twisting around, your feet carried you the remaining distance towards the nursesâ station overlooking the ICU. As you laid the stack of files in your arms down on the counter, a familiar voice found your ears right before her visage popped into your periphery.
âPlease tell me that that was what I think it was.âÂ
Your gaze stayed glued on the charts a moment longer as you ignored your friendâs prying, âhello to you too, Kate.â
When your head finally raised and you let her catch your eye, her wide ones questioned you before she expectantly poked once more, âwell?â
âWell what?â you shrugged, though your feeble attempts at shutting the pending subject down failed as she shot you a glare, efficiently causing you to crumble with a sigh, âyes, he asked me out againâ, or kinda. It was just coffee.â
âAnd you finally said yes?â she smiled keenly.Â
Holding back your scoff, you simply uttered, âno,â before spinning on your heel.Â
âAgain?â she shuffled slightly to catch up to the pace you swiftly slipped into, âwhy not? Heâs kind, heâs a doctor, heâs hot,â she listed off, counting on her fingers, âheâs literally perfect for you.â
âI know he isâŠâ you tilted your head, almost with an air of shame, âheâs exactly the type of guy that I should be running afterâŠâÂ
Though you liked him as a person and cared for him enough to call him your friend, those feelings you caught yourself forcing just hadnât bubbled up yet. He was the kind of man that you deserved, that you should fall for, and certainly not the monster that still haunted you, that for some reason wouldnât stop popping into your mind, especially at inappropriate times, like very late at nightâŠÂ
âSo then why arenât you?â Kate asked as you entered the employee locker room.
And though thoughts of a gruff gangster caused your heart to swell, you still muttered, âI donât knowâŠâ as an excuse before you popped open your locker and uttered, âhey⊠what do you know about mobsters here in the city?
âOther than the horror stories Iâve picked up in the ER, not too much,â she leaned against the row of cubbies beside your own as you dug out your bag and began to change out of your scrubs and back into the clothes youâd worn early this morning when the sun was still only a promise waiting to rise, âthough I did grow up here, so I probably do know a bit more than you,â she acknowledged your move to the city only a few years prior, âwhy? Are you suddenly in the mood for a change in careers?â
Though the truth was on the tip of your tongue, you still found yourself obeying the commands the gangsters had sent you home with. Telling the cops was no use because they were all in their pockets, and confiding in a loved one also wasnât a smart choice as that would only put them in danger.Â
âHave you ever heard of someone called Bucky Barnes?â you asked, instinctively lowering your voice to a whisper.Â
The ever light-hearted expression plastered upon Kateâs face fell at the recognition of that name, âyeahâŠâ
âReally?â your brows rose, âwhat do you know about him?âÂ
âI mean, other than that heâs the supposed leader of the Avengers, not too much.â
âThe Avengers?â
âYeah, one of New Yorkâs most notorious gangs,â she let out a breath, âfrom what little I know, they get up to a shit ton of stuff straight out of a De Niro movie or something, but their real money maker is cocaine⊠I mean, thatâs why the head of the group is known as the winter soldier.âÂ
âHow do you know about all this stuff?â you squinted back at her in slight amazement.Â
âWent to med school with a few coke heads, might have dated one of them,â she blurted before shaking her head and getting back to the subject at hand, âanyways, Y/n, the point is, you donât wanna mess with those types, trust me.âÂ
âI know,â you uttered quietly as you shrugged on your coat and pushed your locker closed, âI wasnât planning on it, I was just curiousâŠâÂ
As you dragged your foaming toothbrush over the last of your teeth, a loud knock suddenly rattled your front door, causing you to jump atop the pink bathmat in your tiny bathroom.Â
Neck twisted out towards the entryway of your apartment, you briefly leaned over the sink to spit out the toothpaste slowly leaking out of your mouth, before your feet began to carry you towards the exit.Â
One of your palms momentarily ran over the edge of your pyjama-clad arm as the night chill soaked through the cotton and made you yearn for the warmth of your bed.Â
Though as you pulled on the handle, the haunting figures on the other side of the door caused your blood to freeze with recognition. Standing tall on the other side of the threshold, there stood two of the Avengersâ henchmen.Â
âYou need to come with us,â the one called Barton ordered coldly. Over the few days the gang had held you captive, youâd picked up on the names of many of the members, including the two that stood before you now.Â
âWhat?â your chest rose and fell rapidly, âIâ, please, I swear, I havenât told a soul.â
Having them knock at your door was one thing, but even just the thought of criminals such as them knowing where you lived sent you into a spiral.Â
âYeah, we know you havenât,â Scott put a hand on the doorframe, âthatâs not why weâre here.âÂ
âWhat happened?â you murmured as you were led into one of the many sitting rooms in the mysterious manor they once again brought you to. In an armchair before you, half-empty glass of bourbon in metal hand and the sleeves rolled up on his blood-tainted shirt, there sat the big bad winter soldier himself, panting as he slowly sipped.Â
Though when the sound of your voice filled the room, Buckyâs eyes only snapped up to yours for a moment before he shot a glare at his men.
âWhat is she doing here?â he grumbled lowly.Â
âBoss, you busted your stitches,â Lang gestured tensely to the crimson slowly staining his crisp white shirt, âwhat else were weââ
Intersecting the conversation, the broad form of Steve stepped into the space between the gangsters and swiftly snuffed the pending argument out, âthank you, Barton, Lang,â he nodded to each of them, âyou can go,â and you watched the pair that had brought you back exited the room. Shifting his weight, Buckyâs right hand man turned to you and offered you a polite smile, âY/n, pleasure to see you again.â
âYeah,â you exhaled, not masking your disdain of the situation youâd been dragged into yet again, âI wish I could say the sameâŠâ before you shifted your eyes to the man in the chair, though still directed your question at Steve, âwhat do you need me to do?âÂ
As you shifted closer to the intimidating leader, ever drinking, surely to dull the pain, Rogers murmured as you kneeled down to assess, âI think itâs just the one on his shoulder thatâsââ
âYeah, I see it,â you cut him off, then glanced back over your shoulder at him, âdo you still have that medical bag?â
âYeah, one second,â he swiftly disappeared to fetch it, leaving you all alone with the feared mob boss.Â
With the crackling fireplace off to the side as your only source of light, you cautiously raised your hands and asked, âdo you mind taking this off?â motioning to the shirt he wore.Â
âYeah, sure,â Bucky sighed and sat down his glass before shrugging the item off. Though youâd stared at his bare chest for hours on end before, soaking in his reveal once again for some reason caused your heartbeat to pick up, though you swiftly averted your gaze in an attempt at staying professional.Â
Not long passed before Rogers had returned with the supplies, and youâd commenced redoing his stitches.Â
âSo,â you murmured though your concentration, weaving his skin back together, âdo I even wanna know how this happened?â
Blinking down at you, your face close to your work and therefore his skin, Bucky breathed, âprobably not...â and as his stare only intensified over the next few stitches, his low timbre once again washed over you as the corners of his lips tugged into the slightest of smirks, âcute PJs, by the wayâŠâ
âYeah, I didnât exactly get a chance to change,â you felt your cheeks heat up.Â
âOh, I'm not complaining,â his gaze shifted to take in the way the cool night air had caused your nipples to become visible like pebbles beneath the thin stripy fabric, the comment making you shift tensely on your knees.Â
Once the last of the knots were tied off and youâd snipped the end of the thread, you wrapped the wounds back up with clean bandages before placing the roll of gauze back into the medical bag.Â
âAlright, uhm,â you shifted back, âyouâre good now,â a slight winch shot through you as you watched him briefly test out his armâs mobility, âjust be careful, try not to use it too much.â
Catching your eye, he uttered softly, âthank you,â before shifting his gaze to the gangster by the door, âRogers?âÂ
âYes, boss?â
âSee to it that she gets home safe.â
ONE MONTH LATER
âIâve heard the risotto here is really good,â Peter noted as you both skimmed the menus resting on the tablecloth before you, the crystal chandeliers illuminating the restaurant cast a soft glow down upon the choices. Â
âYeah?â you briefly glanced up to catch the doctorâs eye, âwell, maybe I should get that then,â you shrugged before shifting slightly in your seat, âhey,â you captured his gaze once more, âcould you maybe order for me? I just need toââŠâ you trailed off, letting the thumb you discreetly pointed over your shoulder in the direction of the bathrooms fill out the rest of the sentence.Â
âOh, yeah, of course,â he nodded.Â
âGreat, thank you,â you smiled as you rose. The long, cobalt-blue, velvet dress you wore briefly swooshed around your legs before the soft click of your heels against the polished floors carried you through the maze of tables.Â
It was the third date youâd ventured on with the kind doctor. The third one and yet you still didnât have any feelings towards him.Â
Stubbornly trying as you might, you still couldnât get the poison out of your system and do the right thing.Â
Once you exited the ladiesâ room, and big breath of courage in your lungs as you pushed open the door, it all seeped out as you walked through the small hallway that connected the lavatories with the dining space, and you accidentally bumped into two figures that waited in the space.Â
Unsure of who was to blame for the collision, you immediately just muttered, âoh, sorryâ,â before you glanced up at the pair and your apology crumbled from your lips, your frame immediately freezing up at the recognition.Â
âListen to me. You are going to quietly walk back to your little date, tell him that youâre not feeling well and need to go home,â Stark kept his voice hushed as both he and the other gangster slowly cornered you, the other one grasping your arm to keep you in place, âand then youâre gonna come with us.â
Sucking in a breath, you then tilted your chin slightly, âand if I donât?âÂ
âThen we wonât hesitate to make a scene,â Barton shifted the edge of his jacket out of the way to flash you the gun strapped beneath, âso you can either walk with us and safe a life or you can not only have a dying gangsterâs blood on your hands, but also everyone in this fucking restaurant.â
With the clench of your jaw, you glared up at them and murmured, â...fine,â before you ripped your arm free and began to walk back into the dining area and the table where Peter still sat.Â
Flashing you a smile as you neared, the doctor swiftly said, âso, I ordered this chardonnay that the waiter said was good. You drink wine, right?â
âIâ, uhmâŠâ your fingers clutched the back of the chair as you tried to appear as you had before, even though now you felt as if your hammering heart might spring straight out of your ribcage, âPeter, Iâm really sorry, but I gotta go,â you briefly scrambled your brain before adding, âthe hospital paged me. There was a big accident downtown.â
âReally?â he fished out his own beeper from his pocket and furrowed down at it, âI didnât get paged, so it probably canât be that bad.â
âYeah, but nurses shortage, you know?âÂ
âRight,â he nodded, disappointment slightly polluting his understanding expression.Â
âI'm really sorry,â you uttered as you picked up your small purse from the chair.
âNo, itâs fine,â he shook his head gently, âhey, I get it,â he shrugged before waving a hand, âgo.â
âThank you,â you stood there a moment longer, unsure of how you should depart, âuhm⊠bye,â before you awkwardly shifted closer to his seat and leaned down to press a brief kiss to his cheek as you offered him a half-hearted hug.Â
âWho is it this time?â you sighed as you were led into an elegant space, surely intended for parties judging by the long bar that stretched along the back wall. Glaring at the only man seated on one of the barstools, you asked impatiently, âis it you? Did you hurt yourself again?â
Glancing over his shoulder as you halted your stride halfway down the short steps, a smile appeared on Buckyâs face as he leaned a forearm against the bar top and bellowed, âY/n! Come, have a drink with me,â he waved a hand for you to take the seat beside him.Â
Standing your ground, you squinted back at him in confusion, âno, I canât, Iâ, whereâs the patient?âÂ
âThe patient?â he echoed as if you were speaking a foreign language.Â
âYes,â you huffed, your annoyance simmering into a full-on boil, âthe person whoâs on deathâs door, the reason why I, a medical professional, is here,â you placed your hands on your hips and asked once again, âis it you?â
âNo, Iâm phenomenal,â he pursed his lips as he snatched up the stout glass waiting for him on the marble counter, ânever been better.â
âOkay, so who is it?â
Tearing his gaze away from you, he then uttered, âno one,â before raising the drink up to his lips. As your mouth parted and your glare nearly burned straight through him, the mobster casually added, âyou look stunning, by the way,â before twisting in his seat to face you more, âI didnât know they changed scrubs out with gowns.âÂ
âNo, Iâ, I was on a dateâ,â you muttered faintly through your confusion, slightly shaking your head in an attempt to clear it before you raised a hand, âwait, excuse me, no oneâs injured?âÂ
âNo,â Barnes shook his head, âno oneâs hurt or dying,â then added as if your reaction was a tad bit too dramatic for his taste, âyou can relax, itâs fine.â
But instead, the opposite emotions roiled inside of you as you slowly ascended a single one of the remaining steps, âso you mean to tell me that your men threatened me, my date and a whole restaurant of people, then dragged me all the way out here again, for nothing?â you fumed.
âNo, it wasnât for nothing,â he shrugged, âthey brought you back here because I told them to,â he kept his ocean eyes upon you as he once again repeated, ânow, come drink with me.âÂ
âNo, I donât want a fucking drink,â you roared.Â
But then, just as swiftly as you had raised your voice, Buckyâs steely hand dipped beneath his suit jacket and pulled out a gun. Â
âI asked you nicely,â his stern tone rolled off his tongue slowly as he aimed the weapon upon you, ânow sit your ass down and share a drink with me.âÂ
Carefully, you finally followed his orders and sat down at the bar beside him.Â
âGood girl. That wasnât so hard now, was it?â he uttered as he sat the gun down beside his drink. Raising up a hand to the silent shadow behind the bar, a glass was soon slid across the counter, one Bukcy pushed closer towards you, âhere,â he said as you stared down at the orange peel floating at the top. As you lifted up the cocktail, the gangster beside you raised his own to click yours, âcheers.â
You briefly toyed with the thought of just taking a sip, though opted instead to down it all, both out of the desperate hope that the alcohol would aid the strange evening, but also in an attempt to fast forward a tad closer to your longed-for departure, ripping the bandage off instead of nursing it all night long.Â
Though as you sat the glass back down on the bar, the bottom clanged against the marble much more forcefully than youâd intended as the fingers you clutched it with began to tingle. Blinking heavily a few times, your hand accidentally knocked over the empty drink as a numbing sensation began to bloom within your chest and spread throughout your body.Â
Trying to get up from your seat, you mumbled foggily, âwhat the hell?â though quickly stumbled as your legs felt like jelly beneath your velvet gown.
âWhoa, careful now, angel,â Buckyâs calm gaze trailed you chillingly as you tried to steady yourself.Â
âThe fuck did you do?â you panted as your wide eyes watched him raise from his seat.Â
âIt's okay,â he uttered softly, âitâs all gonna be okay,â before your world turned to black and you passed out into his arms.Â
When you finally stirred, you were no longer at the bar, nor any other room youâd been in before. You were in a bedroom, situated on a spacious mattress and alongside countless fluffy maroon pillows.Â
As you sat up, a low rustling found your ears and drew your vision down towards the coldness clinging around your ankle. Strung between the bottom corner of the bedframe and your own foot, there shined a chain, one that, try as you instinctively did, you couldnât snap out of.Â
But then, as the door to the room creaked open and caused your body to flinch, a plea swiftly flowed out of you as you watched Rogers step inside, balancing a small tray with a glass and a tall decanter of clear water.Â
âSteve!â you crawled to the bottom of the bed, âIâ⊠help me, please,â you begged, hearing tears thicken up your voice as they rolled down your cheeks, âyouâre a good man, deep down I know you donât wanna stand by and let this happen. Can you unlock me? Please? Help me get out of here.â
But just as you waited for Steveâs lips to part, you instead heard, âshh, donât waste your breath, honey,â as in strolled Bucky, causing you to swiftly scramble as far back on the bed as the chain would allow.Â
Sitting down in a chair just out of your reach, the fireplace opposing the bed, directly behind where he sat, clacked and lit up his spine as he settled into the seat and directed his cold gaze upon you.
âGlad to see you awake,â he uttered calmly.
âFuck you!â you swiftly spat as you hugged your knees tightly to your chest.Â
âAnd with all of your charms still intact,â he tilted his head, a light smirk blooming on his lips as your vulgar language hadnât fazed him one bit.Â
âLet me go,â you demanded.Â
âYeah, thatâs not gonna happen, my angel,â his burly arms folded across his chest, âthis is for your own protection,â he briefly gestured to the chain, âwe wouldnât want you to do anything stupid or rash now, would we?â one of his eyebrows twitched, âI canât let anything happen to you,â he uttered as you continued to stare daggers at him, âyou need to be kept as safe as possible so you can keep on helping me the way that you have.â
âWhat? You want me to be your gangâs personal nurse?â you scoffed, âis this your sick and twisted way of offering me a job, because if so, no thanks!â
âYeah, no, this isnât a job offering, Iâm not interested in those talents of yours,â he leaned further back in the seat before he began to explain, âyou see, for the past few years, Iâve had a serious string of bad luck. Deals have fallen through, rats have been found, the feds have been snipping at our heels and countless of my men have lost their lives,â he listed off, âbut, then I met you,â his eyes flickered up to capture your own, âand it all turned around,â he uttered, âI tell you, when youâre here, itâs fate herself is on my side and nothing whatsoever could go wrong. Like having you has made me a fucking god or something, thatâs the level of power youâve bestowed in me,â a faint smile tugged at his lips as those words rolled off his tongue, âso no, you can not leave. You have to stay right here where I can make sure youâre safe and sound. Although, just because you get to be kept safe, that doesnât mean youâre free of any consequences if you step out of line⊠it also doesnât mean that Iâll deny anyone of your beauty if it pleases them⊠so, I guess itâs more along the lines of you just staying alive under my watch.âÂ
In the blind rage his words threw you into, your fingers wrapped around the bedside lamp before you chucked it across the room. Though just before it could strike the gangsterâs head, he casually ducked out of the way, the lamp instead smashing on the floor behind him as a chuckle began to rumble within his chest.Â
âThatâs cute,â he laughed lowly, âyouâve got some bite. Itâll get you in trouble, but itâs adorable.âÂ
âI'm not interested in being your good luck charm, you superstitious fuck!â you yelled as he got up from his seat.Â
Huffing out a condescending grin, âgive it some time, angel,â he fastened the button on his dark suit jacket before smoothing a palm down over the front, âthe human psyche is much more fragile than youâd think and can get used to some surprising conditions,â he ignored the scream that desperately tore from your lungs and instead turned to Steve standing by the door and asked him calming, âRogers, would you mind cleaning that up?â gesturing to the broken lamp on the floor, and as he received a small nod in return, he murmured, âthank you,â before exiting the room and leaving you to your fate.Â
âSeriously?â Steve let out a laugh when he finally coaxed the truth out as to why you hadnât been touching any of the food theyâd brought you, âand here I thought you were just a picky eater.âÂ
âWell, youâve already drugged me once so whatâs stopping you from doing it again,â you explained, glaring down at the plate before you as he attempted to stifle his laughter.Â
âI swear, cross my heart, your pasta is not poisoned.â
Continuing to squint down at the food, you kissed your teeth, âprove it.â
âReally?â his brows floated up, âalright,â he sighed as he sat down across from you. Dragging your plate closer, he twirled some of the spaghetti onto the fork before slipping it into his mouth, âsee?â he chewed, âIâm fine, and so will you be when you get some food in that belly of yours.â
Pushing it back towards you, hesitantly, you picked up the fork and slowly began to eat. It had only been little things youâd consumed the past couple of days being here, things you could be certain werenât tainted, like the odd apple and such.Â
Though as you chewed and finally began to settle your stomachâs nauseating rumbling, tears began to stream down your cheeks.Â
No matter how hard you tried to beg, none of the mobsters would help you, as their loyalty was just too hard for you to crack.Â
âHeyâŠâ your bloodshot eyes then flickered up to Rogers as he noticed your weeping, âitâll get easier, I promise,â he attempted in a soft tone.Â
âHow?â you blinked back at him hopelessly, âI am being locked up in a room by a maniac as if Iâm just some trinket for him to own.âÂ
Throwing a brief glance over his shoulder, he then leaned in a bit closer to cautiously advise you, ââŠthere might be some things you could do to change your situationâŠâ
âWhat?â a spark suddenly flickered within you, âIâd do anything.â
ââŠyou might consider trying to get closer to BarnesâŠâ his words remained hesitant, ââŠif he begins to care for you, then he might treat you differentlyâŠâ
âLike, heâd let me go?âÂ
âI donât know,â he exhaled, âbut maybe it could get that chain off your ankle,â he gestured to your foot, âbaby steps.âÂ
ONE MONTH LATER
âHere,â Steve croaked as he suddenly burst through the doors to your room, a big flat box in his arms which he tossed on the bed beside you. Peeking inside, a folded-up bundle of black fabric met your eye, âput it on,â he ordered hastily, âmake yourself presentable.â
âWhy?â you blinked up at him, your brows knitting gently together.Â
âBecause the boss requested it,â he answered impatiently.Â
âWhat, he wants to play dress up with me now? Treat me like a doll?â
Over the past month, you had gone from being scared out of your mind, barely sleeping at night, horrified of what they might do to you, till the paralysing fear slowly began to melt away as not much happened at all, in fact so little that you grew bored in your imprisonment, thinking that the big bad gangsters were just all bark and no bite. Perhaps that was a dangerous confidence to develop, growing cocky in your restlessness, but you couldnât help it.Â
Letting out a low sigh, âjust put it on,â Rogersâ head tilted before he said, âIâll be outside, yell when youâre done.â
Popping the lid off all the way, you then slipped into the black gown waiting within. It was long and simple in its beauty as it hugged all of your curves like a second skin.Â
Right before you called out to the mobster in the hallway, you leaned in closer to the mirror on the left side of the room. The dark storm clouds visible out the gothic windows that filled up the wall behind you blossomed in the reflection alongside you as you momentarily fussed with your hair to make it match the elegant dress better.Â
Once Steve had entered the room once again, the very last thing you expected was what he did next.Â
Walking straight up to you, without a word, he bent down and unlocked the chain binding you to the bedpost. At first, a wave of hope washed over you till it was drowned out by the unsettling notion as to where he would take you and just what plans were on the horizon.Â
Grabbing you by the arm, he dragged you out of the room and down the dark hallway youâd only seen glimpses of before. You tried to ask him what was going on, though he didnât offer you any clue in return, only remained silent as he hauled you through the maze-like manor till a wide set of steps found you, leading you down into a garage where a group of the other gangsters already stood beside the black car rolled up by the base of the stairs.Â
Standing in the middle with an arm resting against the roof of the vehicle, Buckyâs gaze swiftly landed upon you as you ascended the stone steps.Â
âWell,â the mob bossâ eyes roamed your form, âdonât you look pretty.â
Biting your tongue, you greeted him politely, âMr Barnes.â
âShall we go?â he cracked open one of the car doors.Â
âWhere?â you tried, though your question only caused him to breathe out a smile as he ignored it and instead commanded softly.Â
âGet in the car, angel,â his metal arm rested atop the door.Â
Riding in a different vehicle than you, it was Clint who slipped in behind the wheel of your car and drove you the silent route towards the mysterious destination.Â
Though once the car came to a stop, the door to your left cracked open from the outside and there to greet you was an outstretched metal hand to help you exit.Â
You didnât recognise the building that loomed before you, though it was grand and opulent with large steps leading you and all the other arrivals up to what sounded like a party already buzzing on.
âSo, you needed a date,â you exhaled as Barnes took your arm and began to lead you up the stairs, a cluster of his men shadowing behind you both.Â
âNo,â he cocked his head, âI didnât need it...â
Casting your glance around at the other guests that passed, you asked, âwhat kinda party is this anyway? Let me guess, human trafficking auction?â you were completely serious, though still managed to make the gangster laugh gently.Â
âItâs a wedding,â his chuckle finished billowing out of his lungs, âor a funeral,â he tilted his head, âI'm not quite sure.â
âHow could you not be sure?â you shot him a glance as you reached the top of the steps and he dragged you inside the marbled halls, âthereâs a pretty significant difference.â
âThey all just kinda melt together at this point,â he sighed, âI have at least one of these a week I gotta show my face at, just out of respect.âÂ
Taking a look around, you uttered, âwell, do you at least know who this funeral wedding is for?â
âNo fucking clue,â he exhaled before following the signs and leading you into the venueâs ballroom.
Turns out it was a wedding for some couple you hadnât yet spotted, though youâd already read their names a thousand times with all the stuff they were plastered upon.Â
You stayed quiet and lingered by Buckyâs side as he shook some peopleâs hands and made some small talk before the two of you found yourselves seated at one of the many round tables in the hall.Â
Blinking up at the floral centrepiece, your fingers fiddled with the white tablecloth as the hours rolled by. Soon, not only the complementary glass of champagne youâd been handed back when you arrived was sloshing in your belly, but also quite a bit more alcohol as you decided that was a good tool to make the evening more bearable.Â
It however also came with the hindrance of boosting your cockiness as you eventually found yourself poking the bear.Â
âYou know for a big bad gangster,â you stared over at him, leaned back in the seat next to yours, âyouâre actually not that scary up close,â you pursed your lips, causing a chuckle to rumble within his chest because of just how untrue that statement was, âsmiling at everyone, being polite. Are you sure you really are the big bad winter solider? The king of New York with no heart and only an imagination for tortureâŠâ
âWellâŠâ he huffed out a short laugh as he met your gaze, âdonât you have me just all figured out.â
âSome of your guys may have filled me in a bit,â you tilted your head.Â
âHave they now?â he continued to look amused.Â
âYeah, well, a bit at least,â you seized your glass and took another sip.
As you placed the flute back down on the table and rested your cheek in a propped-up palm, your stare only intensified into a squint as Buckyâs eyes flickered back around the room.
But as his gaze fluttered back to notice your gawking, he muttered, âwhat?â
âWhy arenât you mean tonight?â you uttered through the haze fuzzing up your mind.Â
Tongue flicking out to wet his lips, his eyes briefly dipped before he uttered, âdo you want me to be mean?â a playful smirk twitched at the corner of his lip in a threat to appear.Â
âIs it all just a lie?â you asked, the subtext of his previous words flowing directly over your dizzy head.Â
âWhat?â
Squinting back at him, you then breathed, âthereâs always a part of me thatâs still scared, imagining what you might do to me⊠but now,â you slowly drew out, âI donât think youâre actually ever gonna do anything,â you blindly decided, âthatâs not really who you are, theyâre all just empty threatsâŠâÂ
âHmâŠâ he hummed, a slight smile blooming upon his lips as he stared back at you, âokayâŠâ before he leaned in closer to utter, âand just what makes you think that I havenât already?â your face immediately dropped as his words caused your frame to freeze up, âtell me, Y/n,â his breath fanned across your cheeks, âdid you sleep well last night? Or the night before for that matter, orâ, well, just during the time youâve spent here with me?â
As your shock not only showed in your expression but also in your complete lack of speech, he simply grinned back at your stunned features before grabbing you by the hand and breaking the moment.Â
âCome on,â he dragged you with him as he then stood up himself, âletâs dance.â
With an argument on the tip of your tongue, the appendage, just as the rest of you, still remained too dumbfounded for it to come to fruition. You didnât manage to gather your wits once again till he had you on the middle of the floor, wide hand on your waist as you swayed to the music.Â
As his hold slowly tightened and he brought you closer to his broad frame, your breath suddenly hitched as you blinked up into his eyes, the air between you growing thick. The hand that grasped your own near swallowed your palm in a dizzying contrast. Goosebumps began to erupt across your skin as you felt your heartbeat thump not only in your chest, but also much further south, a mortifying clue to the dark truth you hoped he didnât somehow notice.Â
Gliding his palm up the length of your spine, it came to rest between your shoulder blades as he then drew you in closer and your gaze fell to the band strumming over his shoulder.Â
âDoes the thought of me playing with you at night turn you on?â he whispered in your ear and continued to gently sway you to the music, âbecause if you want me to wake you, all you have to do is ask. Though my attempts so far at rubbing your luck off on me have been rather eventful, Iâm still sure it would be better if you gave me a bit of a handâŠâÂ
Tilting your head back to blink up at him, you thought you were gonna spit him in the face for making such an accusation, till your stare acted of its own accord and fluttered down to fixate on his lips.Â
It almost felt as if they were calling for you, begging you closer like a stubborn magnet. But before you could close the short distance that kept you two apart, Barton appeared in your periphery and tapped his boss on the shoulder.Â
As he leaned in to whisper in his ear, you couldnât pick up on the words over the music, though watched as Buckyâs face swiftly grew hard.Â
âWhatâs going on?â you asked as the secretive message came to an end and the mobsterâs wide hands faded from your frame.Â
Ignoring your question, Bucky instead cast his glance over your head at one of the men behind you and ordered sternly, âStark? Get her home, now.â
âWhatâs happening?â you tried again, though without success as Tony dragged you away and the remaining gathered to converse in hushed tones.
Perhaps it was because of the chaos of whatever was happening, perhaps just a simple mistake, but when you returned back to the manor, the shackle wasnât reunited with your ankle.Â
Not willing to let that gift slip through your fingers, you soon grasped that opportunity tight and made an attempt at your escape.Â
Sneaking down the many hallways, you successfully hid from a handful of gruff-looking men before you realised you couldnât remember the path to the garage or any other way out of the labyrinth of a building that kept you swallowed in the dark.Â
However, your mission turned into a swiftly sinking ship as soon as you rounded the wrong corner and crossed the threshold of the last room you should have entered.Â
In the centre of the space stood two chairs, both with individuals strapped to them, though only one of them was still alive. Before the seated pair and with his back turned to your frozen-up form, there stood Bucky. Returned from the party and with both his jacket and tie torn off, his sleeves were rolled up though still tainted in small crimson flecks of the deed heâd just done.Â
âCome on, VladimirâŠâ Barnes uttered as he kneeled down in front of the battered man still breathing, neither he nor the other members in the room haven noticed you in the doorway, âjust give me what I want and we can wrap this up.â
Wheezing painfully through his broken nose, the man met Buckyâs steely gaze before fulfilling his request, ââŠIâm sorryâŠâ
âHm?â he leaned in pettily, âwhat was that?â
âIâm sorry,â the tied-up man repeated with a laboured huff.
âOkay, getting there,â he nodded, âwhat are you sorry for?â
âIâm sorry for killing BruceâŠâ the name rolled off Vladimirâs tongue like a crackle to a bonfire.Â
âAnd?â Bucky fished.Â
âFor hurting youâŠâÂ
âSee? That wasnât so bad now,â Barnes straightened back up, âan apology, a life for the one you took from me, and now thereâs just one last thing left to do, and then weâre even,â he then took one step back and conjured his gun. Aiming it at the Russian, barely a second passed before a shot deafened everyoneâs ears and a bullet blasted through the tied-up manâs arm, mirroring the injuries Bucky himself had sustained. The loud blast and the bloodcurdling scream that tore from Vladimir, however, caught you so off guard that a shriek slipped from you as you flinched, revealing your presence as everybodyâs eyes suddenly shifted to train on you. Glancing over his shoulder, Bucky grunted, âwhat are you doing out? What is she doing out?â he shot his glare in the direction of Steve off to the side, âRogers? Get her back into bed.â
âYes, boss,â his right-hand man swiftly nodded before catching up to you in two long steps and seizing your arm.Â
And as you were dragged back to your doom, your eyes caught the tail end as Barnes let out a sigh and turned back around to face his victim, ânow, where were we? Right! I believe the other one was right around here,â another gunshot echoed in the manor as he shot Vladimirâs arm once more, âand now, we canât forget about the ones that only skimmed me, so get up and donât fucking flinch, itâs on you if I hit your lung.â
The chain reunited with your ankle jingled as you twisted on the bed to cast your gaze out the window. Heavy rain hammered against the tall panes as the restless city twinkled through the darkness of the night. In the corner of the room, Steve watched up like a hawk as you continuously failed to find rest.Â
But then, just as you thought you felt your heartbeat return to a normal rhythm, the double doors burst open and in paced Bucky.Â
âIs she awake?â he huffed, though didnât wait for an answer before he heatedly went on, âokay, great.â
As his rushed steps halted by the foot of your bed, the look in his eye caused your body to shudder. Â
âRogers?â he kept his cold stare glued on you as he uttered, âgo wait outside.â
Though you silently pleaded with your eyes for the mobster to stay, it was no use as Steve swiftly shut the doors behind him.Â
As the man before you then shifted, your wide eyes finally noticed the bundle of rope in his grasp as he began to unravel it. Scrambling back, you didnât manage to crawl far away before Bucky caught the chain and yanked it hard enough to force your frame down towards him. Though your struggling finally fizzled out when the gangster pulled out his gun, the very gun heâd just ended a life with, and aimed it at your head to get you to comply.Â
âYou know,â he uttered gruffly like a pent-up bull, âIâve been nice, Iâve been real well behaved, kept my manners intact, been a goddamn gentleman,â the heavy weapon in his hand tilted slightly to emphasise his words, âbut evidently, thatâs not what you need to learn your fucking place,â he fumed before letting out a low exhale, âthatâs alrightâŠâ
âBucky, please,â tears blurred your vision as you held up your palms, âI-I understand, Iâm sorry, you donât have to do this.âÂ
âOh, but I doâŠâ he sighed almost softly as he then kneeled down closer and let the tip of the cool barrel stroke your cheek, ââŠif you donât break a horse, then sheâll never be tamedâŠâ his eyes trailed after the line he drew before it flickered up to find your own, ânow give me your hands,â he ordered and hesitantly, you shakily obeyed.Â
Since you couldnât stay in your place, he simply had to tie you down better.Â
Unfurling the rope in his grasp, the mobster then fastened the cord around not only both of your wrists, but also your free ankle. After each of the tight knots were tied off, he yanked each appendage to the nearest corner of the bedframe, spreading your limbs till you looked like a starfish on the mattress.Â
Taking a step back to admire his handiwork, his fingers then dipped down into his pocket before a slight furrow found his brow as his touch didnât locate the item he fished for. Placing the heavy gun in his palm down on the fireplace mantel, he then closed the distance towards the exit and cracked open the door just a smidge.Â
âRogers?â he extended a hand through the sliver, âgive me your knife,â to which a switchblade was swiftly placed in his palm, replacing his own which was still lodged deeply inside the corpse of the Russian in the other room.Â
Slamming the door behind him, he then crossed the room and silently began to cut your clothes off. The black gown you still wore came off with only a few slices, though your underwear, that he took his time with, slowly grazing the blade over your goosebump-ridden flesh before nicking the cotton clinging tightly to your frame.Â
Once you were bare before him, his feet shuffled back slightly as he let his stare soak up every millimetre of you.Â
A hand floated up to tug on his tie and loosen it slightly from around the collar still dappled with the blood of his enemy. Folding closed the knife with a faint flourish, he then sank down into the armchair directly behind him. The tattered panties heâd sliced from you were still clutched tightly in his hand as his eyes stayed glued upon your frame. Bringing the fabric up to his nose, his blue eyes then fluttered closed for a second as he breathed deeply, letting the scent of you flood his senses.Â
But as he stuffed the cotton down into his pocket and let his palm drift to somewhere else, your eyes grew even wider as you gasped, âwhat are youââ
âJust shut up, please,â he groaned, sounding like he was at his very last straw as he brashly began to rub himself through his pants, âjust for one fucking second, donât be a brat.â
Your jaw couldnât help but hit the floor as he shamelessly pulled out his cock, letting the intimidating hardness spring free of its confines before he spit in his palm and enclosed his fist around the fat girth. You wanted to look away, you truly did, but you just couldnât, a flaw he obviously noticed.Â
âYouâre unbelievableâŠâ he chuckled as his fist silkily stroked up and down his cock, the mixture of his own spit and the precum beading at the tip caused a sloppy melody to fill the room at each and every twist, âI mean, me being into you, thatâs one thing, that makes sense, youâre the closest thing to magic that Iâve ever experienced, so of course thatâs enough to get me going, but you⊠youâre the very textbook definition of a good girl and here you are pining afterâ, how was it again you put it? A superstitious fuck?âÂ
Stunned at his accusation, you tried to tear your stare away, âI donât know what youâre talking aboutâŠâ
âReally? Well, I didnât take you for a fool, but hey,â he tilted his head, âsome folks are just that disconnected to their own feelings.â
Blinking back at him, you scoffed faintly, âyouâre crazy, Iâm notââŠâ but you couldnât even say it out loud as you, deep down, knew that it was a lie.Â
âOh yeah?â he cocked a brow, finding your flustered state amusing, âthen why did you almost kiss me tonight?â
âIââŠI was drunk.âÂ
Letting out a dark chuckle, âalright, sure,â he then rose from his seat and crawled up on the bed with you before he buried his face between your parted thighs, âif you despise me so much, then why are you so fucking wet?â his hot breath fanned across your core.Â
âIâm notâ,â you tried, though your attempt then fell short as he proved you wrong, reaching out his touch to tickle at your lightly and let the wet sounds of your arousal slosh into your soul.Â
âHm?â the broad pad of his thumb gently brushed over your glistening petals, making them part for him, âif this isnât because deep down you want me, then why? Iâd love to hear you try and explain your way out of this oneâŠâ
âI-IââŠâ your eyes fluttered as you tried to fight the feeling, âI donâtâŠâÂ
Laughing lightly through the scoff that then bubbled out of him, he averted his gaze and said, âokay, fine. You wanna play that game?â his eyes flickered back up to find yours, âif you need a bit of help in order to admit the truth, then thatâs what youâll get,â he uttered before suddenly stuffing two of his fingers inside of you.Â
Craning his neck, he tilted down to catch a taste. You tried to hold back your moans as his digits caressed you, but the softness of his velvety tongue came as such a shock that a little squeak managed to slip out past your lips.Â
âI mean, if itâs any consolation,â his stubbly chin glimmered with your essence as he retracted slightly to smirk, âI personally think itâs kinda cute that you have a crush on me like a little schoolgirlâŠâÂ
He then sent his palm down upon your pussy in a wet smack, before repeating the action a couple of times to echo the jolt it shot through your body.Â
âFuckâŠâ he groaned in a low rumble, âyou are so much more pretty awakeâŠâ he revealed casually, âsure, you make some cute noises in your sleep, but not like this,â you instinctually tried to stifle the uncontrollable whimpers that flowed from your lungs, âyou should really be thanking me for all of the time and effort Iâve put into stretching this little hole of yours out,â his fingers continued to pump in and out of you, âif I hadnât, well then you might just split in two when I finally get my cock in there.âÂ
And as he leaned down to lap you up once more, you curled your toes as you felt him push you closer to the edge.Â
âMr BarnesâŠâ you attempted with an air of respect through your pants, âplease donâtââŠâ
âWhy? Because it makes you want to kiss me again?â he teasingly taunted you before continuing his persistent licks, bullying your clit into submission.Â
And as he kept going, even as you gasped, âstopâ, a-ah!â he still kept his lips locked around your puffy pearl long after a gush of squirt wept around his fingers, keeping his efforts up till your hips were bucking back in sensitivity.Â
But when his kiss finally ceased, he let some of your juices, that had flooded into his mouth, trickle out past his lips and back down onto your pussy, âfuckâŠâ his low groan nearly caused the whole room to rumble, ânasty little cuntâŠâ before he slapped your throbbing core once more, watching as the last little trickle weakly leaked out and soaked the sheets below.Â
Lifting himself up to hover above your constricted form, you then squirmed as you felt him nudge the bulbous tip of him against you.Â
âDoes the idea of liking, or even loving, someone like me scare you that much?â he uttered as he gathered up your slick and smeared it with his cock, âdoes it make you feel all wrong and icky inside that I of all people make you feel the way that you do?âÂ
All of the air in your lungs was then suddenly knocked clean out as he, with one long stroke, slipped all the way inside, before pulling right back out to tap the weight of him against your poor clit with the hold he had at his base.Â
âYou wonât spontaneously combust if you admit it out loud, you knowâŠâ
He repeated the motion, plugging you up completely before he denied your cunt the chance of getting used to the stretch.Â
âI just wanna hear you say itâŠâ
And on the next time he filled you up to the brim, this time his hips didnât retract.
Reeling as you fought to comprehend the manner his girth split you open, you gasped weakly, âI canâtâŠâ
âHmmâŠâ his eyes above you narrowed slightly before he pointed out, âthatâs not a no,â and he began to move, âfinally getting somewhereâŠâ
The gangster was in no way gentle as he started to fuck your pussy, the selfish force of it caused your body to jostle every time his heavy balls tapped against your slick skin, thereby conducting a lewd beat each time he slammed into you.Â
Lowing himself to get even closer to you, his nose ghosted against your own from the proximity. The gesture made you assume that he was about to press his lips to yours, though they never touched, even as your own instincts overwhelmed you and made you dizzily tilt up to try and close the gap, ânah-ah-ah,â he swiftly clicked his tongue and moved out of your reach, âadmit the truth and then Iâll kiss you all you want.â
With his length still embedded deep within you, he sat back up. His fingers dented your hips as he grabbed onto them and then began to sink them harshly down against his own, lifting your frame entirely off of the mattress as he used you like a toy.Â
âOh godâŠâ you whimpered as your eyes fluttered down to notice the faint bulge that appeared in your lower abdomen, the thrusting imprint of his size visibly showing just how deep he buried himself inside of you.Â
Once heâd plopped your hips back down onto the bed, his hands then instead floated up to play with your tits, the rhythm he offered you causing them to jiggle in his palms. Though once heâd fiercely pinched your nipples and parted ways in a brief tap, his fingers then drifted further down south till his right hand found your puffy clit.Â
Casting his glance down as he rubbed your pearl, a smirk appeared on his lip as he spotted the way your cream coated his girth. Sweeping down to smear his touch against it, what he did next caught you so off guard that you jostled wildly in your binds in an attempt to hit him for his audacity.
âAhh!â you yelped as he stuffed two of his fingers in your pussy alongside his already overwhelming girth, âBuck, no, itâs too much!âÂ
But your squeak only caused him to chuckle as he stared down at the way your little hole struggled to take what he gave it, clinging around him so tightly that loud groans began to billow from him as he soon painted your insides white and pumped you full of his cum.Â
With heavy breaths, he withdrew his dick, though let his digits stay inside your warmth.Â
âMaybe in time you could become more than just my good luck charmâŠâ he murmured as he flopped down to curl closer to your core, âwould you like that?â he nipped at one of your thighs as his load slowly began to leak around his thick fingers, âdoes the idea of me falling down to my knees before you and declaring my undying love entice you, angel?âÂ
âYouâll just have to do better,â he continued as his digits began to twist within you, âlet me mould you and make you perfect for me,â another one of his fingers was stuffed inside of you, causing your eyes to flutter, âjust let go,â he breathed, âshut off your brain and let it become a leaky mess just like your pussy already is for me,â he worked another digit into your creamy cunt before grazing the last one against your stretched out opening, âyou donât need to think, you just need to do exactly as I tell you to and everything will be okay,â his tone was soft as his thumb curled close to the others and sank into your pussy with a pop, âjust break for me, itâs okay,â your body was shaking beneath him as his entire fist slowly twisted within you, âyouâll be so much more perfect ruinedâŠâ
Tears were streaming down your face as you unravelled once more, trembling violently as your pussy clamped down around his wide hand so tightly that it was forced all the way out, a drizzle of your nectar once again spraying out at the intensity.Â
âAlright!â you let out a sob, âalright⊠Iâ⊠I donât understand it⊠but, IââŠâ you caught his eye and confessed, âever since the moment I met you, I havenât been able to stop thinking about you⊠even when I fall asleep, itâs like youâre haunting me in my dreamsâŠâ a faint shake found your head as you blinked up at him through your blurry vision, âI donât wanna feel this way. ButââŠÂ I do.â
It seemed as though time stood still as Bucky stared down at you, an unreadable expression tinting his features before he finally shifted, slowly leaning down over you and inching closer before he finally pressed his lips to your own.
A faint whimper was muffled against his kiss as you felt the world crumble around you.Â
âThat wasnât so hard, was it nowâŠâ he breathed as he ended the soft peck, âsay it again,â his hand slid over your jaw, âpractice makes perfect.â
Blinking up into his eyes, you uttered from the bottom of your heart, âI am yours,â a single tear rolled down your cheek as you still trembled beneath him.Â
âDamn right you areâŠâ his lips tilted into a smile.Â
Fishing out the borrowed switchblade that still rested within the gangsterâs pocket, he then sliced through the ropes and constricted you.Â
Tangling your arms around his neck as you sat up, you captured his lips once again and felt his touch slide down under your ass before he scooped you into his lap. Your sore pussy wept against his cock, once again throbbing and hard as a rock against your core. As your tongue danced against his own, you couldnât help but scramble even closer, pressing your body impossibly close to his own as you grinded down against him.Â
âYou are mine,â he groaned as he manhandled your frame in his hold and sank you back down onto his fat dick, âyou are my most prized possession,â your bodies met in sticky claps as the aftermath of the rough round moments before still oozed all over this one where passion crackled behind both of your own desperate efforts, âI will never let you go,â he blinked up into your eyes as you rode him, both of you clinging to each other as the end crept ever nearer, âalways need youâ,â his sentence was briefly broken up by a moan as you rolled your hips, your pussy gripping around him and squeezing him tightly, âneed you by my sideâŠâÂ
Once your synced-up orgasms had both shuddered your senses and you were sharing each otherâs breath, your eyes remained locked as his throbbing cock stayed buried deep within you.
âSo, what now?â your chest rose and fell as you whispered into the night, the pitter-patter of rain splashing against your windows once again catching your attention as it swept over and mingled with your laboured pants of breath. Â
Not shifting his gaze, his eyes briefly scanned your own in search of any ounce of deception, before his fingers dipped down into his pocket and conjured a tiny key, ânow,â and he stretched down to undo the chain at your ankle. The click of the lock felt like a gasp of real air was finally filling your depraved lungs, âI take you to my room,â and he manoeuvred you around to slink one arm in behind your knees while the other stayed fast at your spine. As he rose from the bed, he plucked you up with him as well, carrying you in his hold as he exited the bedroom.Â

© 2024 thyme-in-a-bubbleÂ
#leaâs writing#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes x reader#mob!bucky#mob!bucky barnes#mafia!bucky barnes#doctor!peter parker#peter parker x reader#mob!bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes fanfic#mafia!bucky barnes x reader#sebastian stan smut#dark!bucky barnes#dark!bucky barnes x reader#nurse!reader á°
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Curiosity Killed The Cat
prompt: after rescuing you from kidnappers, you overhear your boyfriend-turned-savior complain about how clingy you've become.
pairing: Mafia!Bucky Barnes x female!reader
fandom masterlist: Marvel
collection masterlist: Clingy Baby
word count: 5.1k+
note: author wants things out of her drafts! also don't take this fic too seriously, it's not much at all - just me writing for the fuck of it until i'm ready to focus on my bigger projects.
warnings: modern AU, Mafia AU, obvious cursing, small hurt and comfort, brief depiction of physical violence and self-destruction in the form of: loss of appetite, lack of sleep, other symptoms of depression. NOT edited! author is ashamed because she knows she can give you something better but oh well.
Your feet planted, jarring you to a halt the moment you heard your name in a conversation you were not apart of.
You heard the hammering of your heart, echoing beats of your blood pumping with harrowing desperation. Hands turned cold and clammy, sweat breaking out on your brow and then freezing, feeling as if your throat had swollen to a new restriction and you were anchored in you in place.
Rooted.
But for now, all you could identify was the paralyzing anxiety that anchored you to your spot and made your heartbeat thunder in your ears. You stood outside the lounge, unable to comprehend relevant thought; still listening to low, docile tones continue their conversation, but you couldn't hear real words.
You were stunned. Panicked, confused, hurt - so very hurt. That seemed to register, too; you were really, really hurt.
This was perhaps why curiosity killed the cat.
You reprimanded yourself for listening in - transporting back to childhood during all the times your parents would scold you for eavesdropping. You knew it was wrong, you knew this was a private conversation meant to be shared between trusting confidants, but you couldn't help it - you heard your name and stopped. It was natural, right? To feel curious regarding a conversation seemingly about you that you, yourself, was not apart of?
Curiosity, indeed.
Blinking rapidly, you remembered the only other time you felt such mounting, pressurized fear, and while it might be dramatic, the only other time you could remember this level of anxiety was from about two months ago...
"Yes, baby, I got the bacon."
"And the jalapeños?"
"Uh-huh, the biggest they had."
"Cream cheese?"
"Do you know who you're talking to?" You laughed into the phone. "I'm a professional housewife by now, you can relax. I got all you needed for your fancy little dinner experiment."
Bucky laughed down the phone, "Oh, please, like I didn't see you salivating when we watched the segment on Top Chef."
"Hush," you laughed, too. "I'm leaving the store now," you told him, pushing out of the heavy glass doors, "and should be home in, like, 10 minutes?"
"Lemme pick you up."
"I have legs to walk with, so, no thank you."
He sighed, "Well, I'll open the wine to let it breathe. Red's still good?"
"Let's do a white tonight, please."
"Good deal," he mused softly. "Hey, I was thinking earlier - "
"Hang on," you pleaded.
"What's wrong?"
"No, nothing. There's just a van slowing down, I don't want to get hit," you chuckled some, looking up and down the street before crossing. "Sorry, so, what were you thinking?"
"We haven't been to Paris in months."
You smirked, "I'm sure our plants in the apartment are dead by now."
Bucky laughed, "Oh, I am, too. But, look, how 'bout it, Peach? You, me, all the croissants we can consume this weekend. I'll take Monday and Tuesday off, we can leave tomorrow night."
"Oh, that sounds nice," you moaned. "Paris in the spring? Baby, that's so dreamy!"
"So, is that a yes?"
"It's a hell yes," you grinned. "Do you know the weather?"
"Supposed to be nice and sunny, not too warm or cold. Figured this would be ideal," he chuckled. "But does the weather matter if we're in bed the whole time?"
"No, we're not wasting our time!" You laughed. "We're gonna go do shit, okay? Stereotypical tourist-couple shit."
"I'll bring the camera."
"And I was hoping we could have dinner at that little place we love?"
"I wouldn't take you anywhere else," he mused.
"I think it's - FUCK!" Bucky froze when he heard the screeching of tires; a van coming up to a skidding halt, flurry of voices all yelling but he heard yours clearly. "No, no, no, hey, hey, what the hell's happening? Hey! What's this - hey, hey! Don't touch me! Ow, shit! No! Hey! Fuck's sake - oh, my God! Ow! Hey!"
"Baby!? Peach! Hey! The fuck's going on!?"
There was a thudding over the phone, and Bucky listened to more struggling - more fidgeting and fighting - and then the slamming of a car door. Still calling your name, Bucky heard a scrape over the line before a different voice answered your phone, "James Barnes. On behalf of HYDRA, you're overdue on your payment and we warned you there would be consequences. Deliver the full amount of 17 million - "
"It's 15," he growled.
"Two million more for the inconvenience of stalking your woman."
"If you even so much as touch her, I swear to God - "
"17 million at midnight, at the pier, or every minute you're late, she'll receive the brunt end of our frustration."
"Don't hurt her - "
"Midnight, Mr. Barnes, at the pier - you know where. Don't be late, she looks like she won't last long."
The line went dead after he heard your screech of pain, confusion, and fear. The moment the line cut, he dropped his phone and slowly lowered himself to sit on the kitchen floor, shock coloring his system. It wasn't that he didn't have the money, quite the opposite - but he and his men had a plan in motion to take out HYDRA, their org's competition, and this was totally against all they anticipated. After a minute to sit in his own worry, Bucky jumped to his feet, grabbed his phone, keys, wallet, and two handguns; holstering them both before shrugging his suit jacket on.
He made every phone call he could, gathering the men he trusted most to (one of) his warehouse(s).
For hours, you were strung up by your wrists in a joint-pulling position while the Brooklyn Mafia formulated a plan of attack. It was the most pain you've ever known, but then the abuse started and you were blinded by this new pain. You had bruises most places, cuts that wept blood; scars that would never heal, wounds that wouldn't ever close. You were delirious, miserable, confused, just dazed and confused; praying to a God who didn't listen.
"Oh, look at that," your captor mocked, holding a thick-bladed hunting knife in hand, "it's one minute til midnight, and I don't see your loverboy anywhere."
You sniffled, unable to respond.
He stared out the lone window, tisking and narrating, "Nope, I see not a soul - and with how protective he is over you, you'd think he'd want to ensure your safety. Not leave it to chance, huh?"
You whimpered as the clock struck midnight, your heart hammering in heavy-hung worry. You had tears in your eyes, heart nearly beating out of your chest, feeling incredibly nauseous. The desire to scream never lessened, just fearing what was to come; the men in the room making you fear for the state of your life, their knuckles cracking. You only begged, "Please. Don't."
The main captor laughed, "You can do better than that! C'mon, give me the satisfaction of tellin' ol' James you begged for mercy - but it wasn't enough to sway me. I'll lie, for sure, and say it happened but it will be so much sweeter if you actually do it."
"Please," you shook your head, avoiding eye contact. "Just don't do this, please."
"Oh, honey," he mocked, "it's not our fault he's late. Lads! Have at her, but leave her face for now - she's still real pretty."
You listened as he gave commands in Russian, understanding after the years at Bucky's side; whimpering when the first blow landed to your gut and knocked the wind out of you. The minutes drug by and you felt your resolve crumbling, heart still hammering to a never-before-felt speed that made it feel as if it were jumping out of your very body at every single pulse point. You struggled in your restraints, but it was futile by how tight you were bound; unable to protect yourself.
At 12:03 am, the doors blew open in a resounding blast; concrete crumbling and sprinkling the floor. You cried out as the smoke choked you, coughing through the haze; only barely able to make out certain figures to know Bucky had brought his best men. However, despite the sting to your eyes from the swirling dust and smoke, you saw a lone man stalk through the blasted wall, through the fray, and straight up to you.
"Bu-Bucky!" You choked in relief as he reached to untie your feet first. You dangled for only a moment as his metal prosthetic ripped off whatever held your wrists to the torture contraption. "Oh, my God. Oh, my God, Bucky, holy shit, baby, please, please, please," you rambled as he freed you and instantly caught you on his broad shoulders.
"I got you, Peach, I'm here, I've got you," he promised in your ear, hoisting your legs around his waist so they latched and then wrapping his arms around you securely. "Don't let go and don't look up, okay? Hear me, Peach?"
You nodded into his neck, only able to cry.
Bucky jolted and jerked slightly as he moved through the fight again, but not a minute later, you were stepping outside into the sobering, brisk spring air. This was the moment you understood how dangerous and fleeting life with Bucky could be, making a promise to yourself that if he says take the car, you'll take the fucking car.
And now, here you were, outside the high-rise apartment's lounge (which was just a converted bedroom), listening to your boyfriend complain about you some 2 months after the whole fiasco. HYDRA had been all but wiped out, and in the weeks since, Bucky's men had gone on smaller missions to eradicate the HYDRA members they heard rumor of being local. Yet you didn't feel safe, yet.
You didn't feel safe if you weren't around Bucky.
Everything made you jump: the beep of the done-dryer, that spritz of the automatic fragrance mister in the bathroom, the "duh-dunnn" of a loaded-up Netflix. Keys jingling, car horns, the barking of the dog in the apartment a floor below you... Everything.
Being around Bucky was just like holding a safety blanket. He would always protect you, and for about a week after your rescue, he laid in bed and around the home with you; being lazy; time off work to simply hold you and assure you were safe. Safe in his arms. Safe in his embrace, his presence.
So now... To hear this... You were devastated.
You didn't mean to eavesdrop, it just sort of happened. It was still earlier in the morning, but Bucky hadn't been in bed beside you and based on the feel of the sheets, his body hadn't been there in a while. So, you made some coffee and then ventured around the home in search of your lover; coming upon the lounge and hearing voices from within.
You knew it was common for Steve Rogers and / or Sam Wilson to stay late or visit early, so, you weren't shocked by that, but did falter in announcing yourself when you heard Sam ask how you were doing since the kidnapping. He used your name specifically, making Bucky sigh, and for your curiosity to peak.
"She's different, man."
"How so?" Sam wondered.
"She doesn't like being without me now," he chuckled without humor. "I'm serious, she won't go to the gym until I do, waits to have meals together, won't leave the house if I'm out, and," he scoffed to himself, "you can forget going to the grocery store or anything - she's even stopped going to work - "
"You told her to stop working, like, two years ago when y'all first moved-in together," Sam deadpanned.
"I know," Bucky shrugged, "but it feels tenfold now that she's so reclusive."
"It's normal," Steve sighed gently.
"Yeah? Is it normal that I can't even go take a shit without promising her I'll be right back?" Bucky snapped in exasperation. "It's that bad, she's that fucking clingy, man. I go in the kitchen to make dinner, she's in there 30 seconds later to 'help' me. I take a shower, she finds a reason to linger in the bedroom, but that was better than before, when she wouldn't even shower by herself. It's just a lot, she's everywhere I look. I'm starting to find new reasons not to come home, man, she's always fucking here - and when I walk in the door, she's on me. I need to fucking breathe, but I can't tell her to stop, she'll get her feelings hurt and then I'm the bad guy."
"Man," Steve laughed, "you can't be the bad guy if you go to her in a calm and collected manner, but it's only been two months. She's still recovering."
"Exactly why if I say anything, no matter how calm and collected, I'm the bad guy. I get she's hurting and tryna recover, but Goddamn, does she have to be in every room I'm in? Do everything with me? How do I tell my traumatized girlfriend to back off? Let me breathe?"
Sam laughed, "You don't! You just said it - she's traumatized! Cut the girl some slack, she's got a lot to fuckin' deal with!"
"I'm not negating from that fact," Bucky argued, "I'm just trying to say, the way she's clinging onto me like she can't function without me is just grating at my nerves. I just need to breathe and recharge, but I can't tell her that - fuck's sake."
"Buck," Steve smirked, "you're worried Peach isn't gonna listen, but that's her literal superpower. Just communicate, she can't read your mind, but you need to remember how traumatic all of that was for her to experience - she's scarred from that kidnapping, man. So, sure, you need to recharge, but she needs the support."
"Is it wrong to ask for a day here and there to do that? To recharge?" Bucky asked quietly.
"If you communicate, it's perfectly reasonable to ask for," Sam assured softly. "And whatever you do, don't tell her you think she's clingy. Chicks hate that, that word is, just, like, taboo or something. Real heavy, negative connotations."
"But she is," Bucky growled quietly, "'s like she's afraid to let go 'cause I'll disappear or something."
"Oh, noooo," Sam mocked, "I'm Bucky and my girlfriend loves me too much and trusts me too much and actually feels safe and dependent on me too much - ohhh noooo!"
There was a thump, Sam's cried, "Ow!", and Bucky telling him to shut up. You slowly backed away from the door, trying to settle your breathing as you made your escape down the hall. When back in the kitchen, you whimpered and let the first tears fall... The first of many you shed in the hour it took you to prepare breakfast for everyone; doing your best to eat as you cooked so you didn't have to linger around the men. You took Bucky's words to heart, and maybe you were too sensitive, maybe you should venture outside again.
So, when the lads came out, you set the table without making eye contact with any of them. "Here," you directed, setting the pancakes down, "I made breakfast, come eat, it's still hot."
"Wow," Sam smiled brightly, "thanks, Peach!"
You hummed, still avoiding their eyes as you just set the abundance of food to the table. "You... Cooked without me?" Bucky asked you with skepticism.
"Mhm," you hummed, setting the coffee pot down to a hot pad, "and I'm going out shopping with Nat, so, eat up, lads, I'll do the dishes when I get home. Love you, boys, bye," you waved them off, snatching your keys and then moving to the door to stuff your feet into your sneakers.
"Woah, woah, woah," Bucky left the table, approaching you urgently, "hey, what do you mean? You're goin' out?"
"Yep, figured I've stayed in too long, might as well get out and remember life doesn't stop just 'cause I'm sad."
"Peach - "
"I'll see you when I get home, Buck, okay?" You mumbled, slinging your purse on your shoulder.
"Well, here, here, hey, wait, hang on," he pulled his wallet out, handing you over a wad of big bills. "Spend it all, okay? Have fun, call or text if you need me, yeah?"
"Sure."
Bucky leaned in to kiss you but you just opened the door, ready to leave. He frowned, watching you, barely managing to call a quick, "Love you!"
You didn't return the sentiment, feeling hallow and all too silly to return the affection. In your purse was your laptop, headphones, chargers, and whatever else, so, instead of meeting your friend, Natasha - being just a ruse to avoid Bucky - you started small and just went to the local café. You used to frequent it back in the day, but times were changed, and yet, they were all the happier to serve you the same as before. Getting cozy in the corner, you set up camp and ordered your favorite coffee basically every other hour - letting the day waste away as you caught up on work emails.
Might've wasted time on Instagram and Facebook and Pinterest. Got shopping done on Amazon. Browsed through Target's online selection. Checked out the sale items at Kate Spade. Perused Fenty Lingerie because you could.
Before you knew it, a message was coming in over your MacBook from Bucky, asking where you were - why had you turned your location off?
You packed up and with a to-go cup, made the short trek back home. When you got back, Bucky was pacing in the living room; staring at his phone and typing, then deleting, retyping, groaning, glancing up, typing again, then doing a double take. "Where've you been, Peach? Huh!?" Bucky demanded. "You're late!"
"Out with Nat," you eased.
He huffed through his nose, nodding slowly, "You have a nice time?"
"It was okay," you answered. "I'm gonna go to bed after I shower."
His brows furrowed, "I have a meeting tonight."
"I know."
"O...kay?" He let you go, wanting to ask why you didn't ask him to join like you had so often in the past few weeks.
And it didn't stop there, in fact, it got worse. When Bucky got home from his meeting, he was actually shocked to see you nestled in the bed; teetering on the edge of the shared space while snuggling a weighted body pillow.
When he tried to give you a snuggle, you stirred to life and pushed him back, muttering, "Too hot."
The following morning, he was relatively surprised to see you up and about before him; barely getting a word in before you were slipping out the door to go on a morning jog. He was confused by how all of a sudden, where you were once everywhere he looked, now, you were disappeared and distant and gone. You worked out alone, cooked alone - but always left him a plate, but long gone were the cute little sticky notes you left for him. You once haunted the apartment by never wanting to leave, and now, ghosted in and out of it on a daily basis.
You never bothered to go far from home. You liked hanging at the coffee shop and luckily, your job let you work from home most days, and the rare time you were due back in the office, it was only about a 20 minute walk. You got better at lying, couldn't even remember the last time you and Bucky had sex, and even now, the last time you had a meal together. You didn't text him about your day; where you once might've told him about an adorable dog you saw on the street, now, you only ever texted him if he asked a direct question.
Food lost appeal, your appetite vanished.
Sleep evaded you, plaguing you with nightmares when you did rest.
Interest dulled, passions were snuffed, and only fearful, confused anger remained. It showed in the way weight seemed to shift around your body, thinning; the lack of sleep creating dark rings and bags under your bloodshot eyes.
After two weeks of this, Bucky grew irritated and short with everyone around him. It reflected in his work, the way he spoke to everyone; even Steve and Sam getting the brunt end of his anger. Without you to assure him, Bucky was off his rocker; losing his cool; his patience stretched far too thin. So much so, the two mates approached an outside associate, Natasha Romanoff, after a particularly snappy meeting to plead for her to talk to Bucky.
"James," Nat greeted as she strode into his office without knocking.
"I know you're my oldest friend, but you don't have that privilege yet," he mused, never looking up.
"What?"
"Not knocking. What is it, Nat?"
"Just came to check on you, you know, like friends do."
"Hm," he chuckled without humor, "and what did Peach say to you?"
"About...?"
"Me."
"Nothing, I haven't gotten ahold of her for weeks."
Bucky paused, slowly lifting his head in confusion; brows furrowed and mouth set in a firm, straight line. "What?" He grit.
"Huh?" Nat wondered.
"She's been telling me that she's hanging out with you for the past two weeks," he revealed.
"Nope, not since the incident with HYDRA."
Bucky's (right) flesh hand crushed the pen in his grip, taking a long breath. "All right," he sighed, "so, why come today?"
"What's really going on, Buck?" She worried softly. "Is it really whatever's going on with Peach? You're this pissed off? What'd she even do?"
"She just..." He cut himself off with a long sigh. "It's nothing."
"Bucky," Nat gave a pointed look.
"She's just avoiding me," he muttered. "It's like she's barely home, almost like a ghost."
"Isn't that what you wanted?"
"Yes, and no," Bucky snipped, rolling his neck out. "I'm just worried about her now, she's never not communicated before."
"Something's bothering her," Nat shrugged. "She probably needs you right now, Buck."
"I can't do it all," he whispered. "I can't be who she wants and run this organization at the same time."
"She doesn't need that, she just needs you to be her partner," Natasha spoke softly. "She needs to feel loved and supported, and surely, she maybe felt weird about whatever you were projecting. Instead of taking it out on your men," she smirked, "why don't you just talk to her? 'Cause I hear you're bein' a more-than-usual asshole lately. You need to ease up or get laid, 'cause you're taking it out on good, loyal men, and that's entirely unfair."
"They can take it."
"Sure, but they shouldn't have to," Nat rolled her eyes. "Look, since you won't answer me, I'm assuming the sour mood is in regard to whatever relationship issues you have right now?"
"Sure," he tossed the pen away, opened a skinny drawer to his right and select an identical one.
"Bucky," she growled.
He sighed, "She's lying to me, Nat. Saying she's with you when she's not... Is this an affair? She's gone all the time now."
"No way," Nat laughed. "Baby girl doesn't have the energy to entertain anyone - let alone two men. You're just the exception."
"Why lie, then?"
"Maybe she didn't want you questioning her..."
"No shit."
"Well, did you get into a fight?"
"No."
"Any reason she doesn't want to be home?"
He shook his head with a sigh, "Not that I know of."
"You had to do something."
"Honest, I haven't. She was being all clingy, but then one day, a switch flipped."
Nat frowned, "You think... Your girlfriend is being clingy... Because she was kidnapped and beaten up... Because of your fucking job... And is probably scared...out of...her mind...? I get that correct?"
Bucky paused for a long moment, muttering, "Oh, my God."
"Yeah, you asshole. Think of it that way! She's afraid!" Natasha snapped. "And probably picked up on your energy, so, she made herself scarce."
"I didn't mean - "
"I don't care, go home, apologize to that sweet angel - she doesn't deserve this."
Bucky paused, "What is 'this' exactly?"
"James. Focus on the present - your woman. Go make this right. We all know you're this big, bad dude - but it's okay to be a little sensitive towards the woman who loves you without condition!"
Bucky relented, figuring the redheaded Russian mobster was right.
The entire drive home, Bucky considered the ways you had changed in the few, short weeks since he vented to Sam and Steve about your clinginess. You didn't take meals with him, didn't cook, work-out, or do anything you used to do together. Sex? Forget it. Dates? Nope. Cuddling? No, you're always 'too hot'. And when he thought about it, he remembers seeing the wads of cash he'd leave for you stuffed in his sock drawer - surely trying to make him think it was just another emergency fund he had hidden. You never spent his money, feeling humiliated by his choice of words.
Clingy...
You didn't text or call him when he was gone, you hadn't even so much as kissed him in what felt like ages... Well, more like you hadn't initiated any kisses...
His heart weighed in his chest as he realized he hadn't even so much as hugged you in days. You were rarely in the apartment together, and when you were, you were just silent and busy with chores. It was as if you operated on the exact opposite schedule as he did, went to new extents to avoid him, and his heart clenched in his chest.
When he got home, you were caught cooking in the kitchen - being obvious that you weren't expecting him. The door slammed and his baritone voice snapped, "Peach!"
You gulped, holding the sauce-covered wooden spoon to your chest. When he rounded around the corner, he found you and slowed down, sighing in relief. "What's wrong?" You worried in a timid tone.
He panted lightly, relaying, "Needed to find you."
"I'm here."
"I know," he relented, charging up to you and engulfing you in a tight, heavy hug. "I needed to talk to you, Peach," he whispered.
"What's wrong?"
"You. You're what's wrong."
"What the fuck does that - "
"No, no," he pulled back to stare down at you fondly, "I don't mean it like that, just that... You're struggling. I can see that. But you're not alone, I'm here with you, and I got a little caught up in my head when I realized someone was so very dependent on me - it fucking scared me. But then... Then you just shut yourself off and hid away from me, and oh, my God, it's so much worse, baby. Don't do that," he breathed, "okay? Don't ever shut me out - don't stop loving me, don't stop talking to me, don't give up on us. I can't read your mind, you can't read mine, it's not an excuse - but we understand better when we trust each other enough to communicate what's required. I'm so sorry I got caught up in myself, I didn't know what you needed - but I'm here now, I'm here - I'm not leaving you."
You collapsed into his chest, taking a shuddering breath.
"Don't ever stop talking to me, Peach," Bucky whispered, kissing the top of your head; keeping you close. "I'm so sorry, baby, if I - "
"If?" You snapped, pulling back to glare at him through your tears. "I heard you, Bucky. I heard you talking to Sam and Steve, and about how clingy I am."
"I was wrong," he insisted. "I was overwhelmed and tired and just stretched thin, the easiest thing to do is attack those closest to me, and that's you. It's not right, it's the worst I could do to you after all you've been through, and I'm so sorry. I was wrong, you're not the person to take this out on - and I'm so sorry, Peach."
You sighed, "I don't mean to be... I don't mean to cling - "
"Nah," he chuckled, caressing your cheek, "you cling as much as you want. Cling as tight as you want, baby, don't let me go. I'm sorry for what I said and the way it made you feel, it was wrong - so fucking wrong of me, and I see that. When you pulled away from me, I just... I couldn't think. It felt so wrong, and I knew it was my fault." He took your face in both palms, promising, "I'm so sorry, Peach."
You shrugged meekly, "It's okay."
"It's not."
"No, but apologizing is a step in the right direction."
He nodded, "What else can I do?"
"Nothing - "
"Peach."
You paused to think, smiling shyly, "Movie night?"
"Whatever my pretty girl wants," he nodded.
"Hmm... Get a bath with me?"
"All right... Sure, okay..."
"And face masks."
He sighed, "Okay."
"And mani-pedis."
"Baby."
"You said you were making it up to me, right?"
He smirked, "That's right... All right, yeah, sure, fine, we can..." He sighed again, "We can do all that, Peach, whatever you want."
"I just want you," you told him softly. "I didn't mean to be so clingy. I was just afraid... I felt afraid everyday, just so very unsure in this life. You're the only thing that makes sense to me, Buck, and when I heard you, I just... I guess I realized how dependent I'd been and wanted to give you space. Last thing I want is to smother you, to drive you away from me."
"Not ever gonna happen," he promised softly. "I just didn't handle it like I should've. I'm sorry, Peach, but I'm here now - for whatever you need. Want me to take a few days off, just be together? I'll arrange it. Want to get away for a bit? We can go."
"I just need you," you whispered. "Only you and I should be okay - I can be okay if I have you, but feeling like I lost you? Even a fraction? Buck... James, it was such a harrowing feeling, I wasn't sure what to do to move forward. So, I think I just panicked, shut down; thought if I could just get back to normal, you'd love me again..."
"I never stopped loving you," he swore, "I just had a bad lapse in my own judgement. Nothing against you, baby. Nothing."
You nodded again, letting him tuck you into his chest; perfectly snug under his chin as he coiled his arms around you. He let out a long sigh, his guilt swelling to new heights, but for that present moment, everything seemed okay.
Felt okay.
Appeared okay.
And you'd both do whatever it took to remain as okay as you possibly could.
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THE THREAT OF INTIMACY
†Mafia!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader Angst â insecure reader and depictions of negative thoughts and fear of sexual intimacy â profanity â SMUT 18+ mdni â virgin!reader/loss of virginity â unprotected sex â hurt/comfort â oral (female receiving) â le dasha of body worship âcream pie â mafia bucky being a huge softy for his wife â I think that's it â 7.4k A beautiful bride marrying the man of your dreams. But when faced with what comes after the vows and first dance as Mr. and Mrs Barnes, you suggest that a particular arrangement be made.
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Itâs not so much of a grand show once the curtain falls. There hangs a greed of mischief and ominous silence. He looks at you, blue eyes piercing the exposed skin of your back, the white gown hangs an elegant silhouette on you. Its embroidered sculpts become melded into the fabricated folds as you stop midst the gate of your saunter forwards, each step a reminder drawing nearer as you do to the bed.Â
Did you really have to do this?Â
It was an era of change after all. But his seniors were old school, and so you expected him to be as well in the matters of the marriage bed. It is expected of you â the both of you. Your hands fish through the elaborate style of your hair, musing it loose and gaining a comforted scalp as you turn away from the bed and walk over to the large windows that extend from top to bottom, overlooking the twinkling space of stars fallen to earth.Â
Being far away from it means you are torn from it. Once you step foot back in that place, you are no longer the girl you once were.
You are now Mrs. Barnes. A wolf among sheep. The queen of the Bratva. A cooperation of mobsters who have bought police eyes and silenced officials of the government. But was this status and power worth what is intended to follow?Â
You didnât have a real choice in the matter. Well, maybe you did. You fell for him, you wonât deny it, and you fell hard for him. Other pickings were not as savoury, nor did they explode with the chemistry you shared with him. But this wasnât the only factor.Â
Itâd been clear that your hearts were set on one another. With the subtle whispers into the otherâs ear, hugging and kissing, fingers entwined, or the more assuring hand on the low of your back. This intimacy had been a flavour sweet â loving â and you came to embrace these softer textures of your life at his side. His proposal was impossibly expected but even then, you couldnât contain your surprise and eagerly said yes.
You never gave the thought of what came next exactly. The very intimate aftermath. Until his mother pulled you aside, a smile on her painted ruby lips as she guided you to walk with her through the hedged gardens. That conversation is one you will never forget. Her love is shocking, her devotion to her husband and family, you can hardly stand the thought of not loving her in return.Â
But that talk shocked you.Â
Half of it because of the gory details she regaled, but the other half because of your own mind. Your poisoned mind that festers with anxious insecurities.Â
Of course itâs expected. Your virginity doesnât exactly wave you as an expert, no matter what talks of womanhood you are subjected to. But by the standard of Mr. Bucky Barnes, his former bachelor days had given him what you lack: experience.Â
What if Iâm so bad that heâs repulsed by me?Â
Heâll only need to take one look at me and thatâll be enough.
What if I canât make him cum?Â
What exactly am I supposed to doâ I donât think Iâm ready.Â
You continue on in your panicked, internal reverie, hand raised to rest your lips against your knuckles, the shine of diamonds catching in the dark reflection, a momentary blindness befalls you that then causes your stomach to writhe with unease.
âHey,â your husband whispers, breath warm over the shell of your ear and his lips tease the curve of your exposed neck with light kisses. Your body flinches at the suddenness of his appearance right behind you, his chest to your back; you feel tears deep into the corner of your eyes, hot and wet and annoying. The stronghold of air chokes you in the back of your throat.
âMm, hiâŠâÂ
Your forced smile is quick to fade, just barely passing back a glance at him before looking away. He catches this falter. His expression is shadowed by a troubled frown. He noticed the way you flinched before him. And that glistening of tears is hard to miss when it comes to you. Â
âTalk to me,â he presses gently, âyou okay?âÂ
His hands are strong and sure as he holds you, turns you to face him directly now, putting the window to your back. Your ring bound hand massages over your face with a breath hollowing out in a deep sigh.Â
âYeah. Iâm good, I think we should get some rest. Itâs been a big day.âÂ
Before you can step around him, his hand circles the entirety around your forearm, holding you in place.
âYou donât want toâŠâ At the trailing end of his words with his blue eyes alluding to his meaning, the sting of tears prick your vision again and a flush paints your cheeks and neck red. He lets you walk away with the train of your dress flowing behind you like a silken shadow.Â
âI donât think tonight.â
Or any other nightâŠÂ
Buckyâs throat bobs with a thick swallow, nodding as he watches you. Always a man who knows what to do, how to maintain composure â his power â he feels that confidence wane like the fading moon. Powerless.
The words brewing on your tongue are tart, poisonous and unpleasant. Not the sort you would ever want to say to your husband, no less on your wedding night.Â
Youâd ventured over to the vanity by now, you say beneath a shaken exhale, âIâll look to hire a mistress.â
âExcuse me?â He gasps sharply.Â
Your reply, voice short of anything joking or playful. You sit before the vanity and bend forward, unfastening the golden clasps on your heels before you set them aside. âIâll have a mistress contracted for you. Weâll do everything else together but she will⊠provide the sexual affairs.â
âAnd you?â His question makes you pause midway of turning fully towards the mirror, only barely do you see him trail the outskirts of the room, just only in focus of your view. With a sigh, you pluck your earrings out, saying more so to your own reflection than him, âIâve gone this long without sex, Bucky. Iâm sure I can go on the rest of my life without it.âÂ
âNo, no, weâre not doing things like that. I married you â I want you.â Why is that just too hard to believe? You canât bring yourself to meet his eyes in the mirror, so you look away, anywhere that doesnât meet his gaze. âHoney, where the fuck did this come from?â
You donât answer. The man is practically brought to his knees before you like a servant ready to obey you like a goddess. Treatment he committed to you, though you donât feel deserving of. He spins you slowly on your stool until you face him, knelt before you, he tries to find the stunning awe of your eyes only to find you hiding away from him. âDid somebody say something to you? Who was it?âÂ
Quick to spare someone needless bloodshed, you stand abruptly, almost knocking him back and storm away from him by some feet, putting distance between you both, your voice carries over your shoulder, âNobody said anything. I just think this arrangement will be better for us.â
Youâre blinking back a curtain of tears that threaten to unleash. A wave rises high like a tsunami in your soul with these stupid, incessant thoughts.Â
Youâre imperfect.Â
Youâre ugly.Â
Let another woman â a beautiful woman â please him.Â
Heâll regret marrying you once he sees you.
Fingers ringing the course of massaging your temples, you are slowly being drowned by many, many thoughts like these. They're endless. Theyâre relentless and they are loveless. Not once do you give yourself the internal piece of mind that maybe, just maybe, there is hope in this relationship. That they are wrong. That he wonât judge or run from you. But who can say for sure?
Itâs best to play it safe and keep what dignity you have left. Despite the spitefulness of seeing him become satisfied by another woman, it would be better than depriving him for the rest of his life. And you care more for his own happiness. Itâs all you want for him.Â
He speaks up again, his voice going stern in his verbal study. âSo, let me get this straight: I marry the love of my life, the very essence I love and breath for, only to⊠fuck another woman. After I swore a vow to you.âÂ
âBucky, youâre making it soundââ
âIâll go without sex for the rest of my life than have some whore in our bed.âÂ
You spin on your heel, mouth agape. Finally you look at him long enough as he works to slowly approach you and he sees just how badly youâre hurting on the inside. âBuckyââÂ
How quick he is to cut you off before you can even utter another heinous thing, now reaching you. âI wouldnât stand at the altar for just anyone. I gave up that bachelor life to have you. I chose you. I want to have all of you.â
You mutter, mumble off-centred excuses that come out as broken noises on a record, and then you let out a shaken breath, chest feeling like it's being cleaved and ripped apart to the point your body trembles. You try your hardest to suppress your quiet sniffles as the flow of tears begin, fingers hastefully dapping away as to not smear your makeup; your only means of perfection that youâve felt in a while.
When you saw yourself in the white dress every little girl dreams of for the first time in a bridal shop far too expensive for the average, then again in the dressing room with hair and makeup done to the nines, it all almost made you forget about the gut-wrenching aftermath once the reception concluded. That you were walking down that aisle with a purpose you would never come to regret.Â
Was it all a foolish fairytale to idolise this facade of beauty?
The hand bearing his ring uses a force so gentle you think itâs the end, that when you look up, he will be gone. That your wedding dress will fade into your everyday jeans and grandmotherâs patchy sweater you treasure too much to throw away, her scent still lingering there to inhale on a bad day.Â
He drives your focus upwards until your eyes meet, your vision hindered behind a blur that wets your lashes as you blink. A vibrant colour of blue that once intimidated you now attends to assure you, to quiet your riled fears, but there is a reluctance to let your guard down this time.Â
His hands cradle your jaw in his hold with a promise to never let you go. To never let you know this fear again.
âI wonât judge. I wonât run in disgust or whatever you think Iâm gonna do. I think my vows can be credited to that, yeah?âÂ
Your bottom lip sinks inward slightly, teeth biting down hard on the plump of flesh, muttering a softly broken, âI-I guess.âÂ
âYouâre scared.â
It is shame that brings your eyes to falter, chin wobbling until it crinkles. âYesâŠâ
Itâs like he could read you, knowing that your next move is to shove him off â push him away â he leans down and presses his lips to your own. Warm, a little roughened yet still retaining a softened plush of texture, he breathes some sort of cooling flame that soothes you if not for a short while. A rattled, sharpened gasp teeters on the edge of your voice and he parts from the kiss with a low and silky drawl. âWe donât have to do anything you donât want to, love. We can take our time with this.âÂ
Youâre hoisted into his arms, strength unyielding as he carries you over to the bed and sets you atop the mattress like porcelain. For him, heâs scared how easily it is to break you, no matter how hard you hide this fragility. You use the outside of your hand to wipe at your nose and exhale loudly, mind prattling on with your swirling thoughts.Â
Pathetic.Â
Heâll definitely need a mistress after that display.Â
And all youâre better off getting is a toy.Â
His family will ridicule you. Heâs going to tell everyone that his little wife refused to have sex with him on his wedding night.
Poisonous thoughts. They arenât going away. With a sniffle, you watch Bucky begin to strip himself down, leaving himself to his boxers. However much you admire the act in itself, itâs far too intimate than anything else. The idea of you doing that for him sickens you. You become repulsed by yourself.Â
Your mind is a hideous beast.Â
Like you.
Shut up!
You make this wedding dress look ugly.
âCome on, doll,â Buckyâs voice breaks through the hazardous cloud like a lighthouse awaiting for you ashore, guiding you to safety. He offers you a smile you try to match only to feel your lips twitch, muscles cringing as you keep the well of tears and cries inside. He invites you to join him and you move up the bed. You canât bear to shed the second skin of your dress to reveal the lavish, risque lace and frilly lingerie youâd picked out at the encouragement of your bridesmaids.
You never really gave it much thought before until it was too late. This culture of intimacy you perceive as a threat.Â
Your husband doesnât question you. Instead he lays beside you, arms stretched out to invite you into his embrace. An invite you half-heartedly indulge in, inching yourself awkwardly to his side but remaining to keep some inches from him.
Head laid on the tucked shelf of your arms, hair mused to fall over your features, you intend to wallow in silence until exhaustion overtakes you into sleep.Â
Youâve ruined his day.
âWhat are you thinking in that pretty head of yours?â The question is directed to you, youâre sure. But it also sounds like heâs asking himself for the answer to a riddle he cannot begin to understand.Â
âIâm sorry I ruined your dayâŠâ
The contortion of his features almost has your body locking up into a tightly wound position, the form of his dark brows bevelling in the middle, eyes widening until the blackened pupils shrink into tiny dots.Â
âWhat?â he sputters, âNoâ no, honey. This is our day.â
Our day?
There is a storm of emotion battling in his own eyes, however, he is just as quick to hide it from you. He trails again to caress the line of your jaw, his thumb strokes along your bottom lip. âLove, I will never force you into anything. Not your first time, not your hundredth. You hear me, yeah?â
Your eyes only look to stare at him with a stillness, before you absently nod. Then you turn, putting your back to him. You cannot bring yourself to look at him out of sheer guilt that no matter what, he cannot silence the honest and cruel torment of voices in your head. Not forever. They will find something to pick out and gnaw at to send you into this spiral.Â
If you could do so without the judgement of your husband, you would cry and howl into your pillow for hours until the perfect mirage of your makeup fell apart, youâd spare the dress from being a ridiculed taint by being on you any longer. Youâd be on the phone to your sister pleading for her to keep you company and distract you from this pain, youâd cry into her chest as she held you with all the strength she possessed. Youâd ask your parents to call you beautiful, even though itâs a lie.Â
But you keep it all in. And it breaks you so harshly on the inside that it cuts you like thousands of shards shredding you apart.Â
Youâre not sure exactly how much time has passed between the void of silence. You canât sleep. The tyrannical storm of emotion swarming inside you makes it impossible to even try lest you break and let it all out, letting it show.Â
âB-Bucky?â you squeak, clearing your throat and you hear him hum immediately in response, the weight of him rolling over until his body is a ghost along your back. âCan I⊠uhm, can I ask you something?âÂ
Aside from the odd hiccup and sniffle here and there, you hold firm to sounding as you were before, the bubbly and playful girl Bucky couldnât help but tease until you were a flustering mess, the girl who attempted to flirt back only to fumble over your words and proceed conversation with a shy smile. The girl he fell in love with. The one he gladly stood at the altar for. Before the voices.
âOf course, doll. Anything.â
 Nervously your fingers flex and wind together, thumbing the fabric over your breasts, the enclosed circlet of cleavage pressed closely together. You wish you could giggle at the way you caught Bucky gawking numerous times in supposed awe of you throughout the day. He often is like that every time he sees you though, now that you come to think about it.Â
Supposedly.
Not likely realâŠ
Iâm going to regret asking this, arenât I?
With a heavy swallow coated heavily in your hesitance, you take a breath in hope that proves to fail to settle your nerves. âYouâve been with plenty of girls before me⊠you know how to please them, what didâŠâ you pause upon a whimper, âwere they all the same?â
The amount of strain behind your vocal cords makes you cringe in disgust. You sound likeâ
âNo, they were all different. Unique to each girl.â You can almost sense the way his head props up to look at you. His eyes staring a cool layer of heat into your back. âJust like you.â
âHow can you say that?â Your voice betrays the toxins of a heart and mind poisoned together over far too long. Bucky hears the loathe of self in your words, dry and cynical, unbelieving in his words and your own image. âYouâve never even seen what I look like⊠you donât know how Iâll be, Iâve neverââÂ
Your hands press over your eyes in hope to suppress the tears glassing over your vision.Â
âHey,â Bucky admonishes with a low drawl, tutting you, âhey. Iâm not expecting the fucking grandios of perfect sex. Iâm expecting you and only you. I want what makes you and your body unique.â
You turn your head to see him, chin wobbling slightly. How heâd crawl through hot coals and glass for you, seeing the beauty of what you see are flaws. He then grins and for a moment, it disturbs you how he could smile when youâre like this.Â
âI wasnât the best for my first time. In fact, Iâm telling youââ
âBucky, no, you donât have to,â you interject with a stifled cough. You shoot to sit up and your husband follows, chuckling.Â
âNo, I will tell you I was shit at sex. Horrible. My first timeââ
Your hands paw and pat at his mouth to silence him to no avail, your chorus of hiccups and sniffles turn into shy giggles.Â
âIâcouldnâtââ
You giggle a little louder this time. âShush, Bucky! No-ho!âÂ
âCouldnât evenâ find the clââ
Your fingers are a heavenly pillar even as they hold his lips prisoner from speaking aloud. He smirks behind them and plants delicate kisses to them, enamoured by the faint smile on your face and the softness of your eyes. Seeing you cry and be tied to these human emotions makes a fire burn in his chest. Like for the longest time, heâs finally found someone who can make him feel whole. If only he could help you feel the same. In the make of those blue, puppy dog eyes, you crack and scoff out a snort. âNew Yorkâs infamous Mob LordâŠâÂ
He beams from ear to ear at the unfinished implication, taking the time to fall so hard in love with you all over again. He leans his forehead against yours with a rumbled, âMhm.â
Mascara smudged under the barrage of wet lashes and tears, your lips part with a shaky breath. âBucky?â
He hums again, so you press on, throat suddenly tight. âDo you think you could make me feel that way?â
His response is instant, deep voice trailing along the bridge of your neck, much like it had done earlier as his arms circle the lower curve of your arse and hoist you until you balance atop his thighs, keeping his weight on his haunches. âMoya zvezda, that and more.âÂ
Your arms drape over the burly muscle of his shoulders, breath mingling with his in hot gusts laboured with anticipation, you hear him groan as you ever so slightly lower your hips against his and he pushes you that little higher on the pedestal he holds you on, itâs height greater than any earthly accomplishments men can dream of.Â
Itâs why youâre his star.Â
I love this man.
With all my heart.Â
His front presses fully into you, he works to weave one hand beneath the shower of your gown and feeling along the sheer stocking attached to your garter; he groans again, more feral sounding in his sensational marvel of how perfect you are. How blessed he is to be the one to touch you like this. To hold and have you so intimately.Â
At his touch, your body erupts with a shudder, momentarily staggered by the electric push and pull and thriving buzz between your legs; though the stir of arousal isnât foreign to you, it certainly is a stark contrast with his attentive action.Â
His lips smother the embers of your trembling gasps with a kiss, passion tasting as a fine wine on his tongue. The kiss is paced slowly to attend to your cautious nature, an utter surety that he wonât make any move against you. You take no part in stopping him as he pushes aside the obstructive barrier of your panties.Â
The way his fingers are gentle to stroke your core has you keening, teetering on a choked whine, his work deliberate in focusing on the pearl of your sensitive clit and the slickened beginnings of your folds. His hands that have sinned many times now amend themselves with the purity of worshipping every inch, exploring you with the intent to please. His thumb rolls in drawn circles, eliciting from you mewls and heated pants of air too heavy to stay in your lungs, cooing at your slow induction.Â
âAtta girl.â
Iâm alright.Â
âYouâre doing amazing.â
Iâm safe.Â
His two fingers run along your entrance, causing your spine to arch slightly and he smirks, pulling from the kiss.Â
âYou like that, doll? Yeah?â he asks smoothly, seeing you nod shakily with eyes half lidded.Â
Your hands entangle themselves to the bedded roots of his hair, tender as you can to pull with each spark that has your stomach tying knots and your muscles tensing, his thumb begins to roll a little harder and faster. At hearing the apparition of a moan escape you, he applauds you with his encouragement despite the way your hand covers over your mouth to silence these noises.
âFuck, please again, zvezda. Please.â
âI want to hear you.â
âPlease⊠fuck you sound so beautifulâŠâ
In your stun over his pleas, your hand lowers away and you continue to let your moans lull him, hips moving at a slow crawl against his fingers that press to your core and with a single look you let him know youâre willing. He fights the tantalising grip of your fingers to reach your lips as he pushes two fingers past your folds. Your gasp is a sharp sound to his ears, one of alert that he seeks to comfort you through the kiss.
The trajectory to pull your hips away stabilises and you begin to find that rhythm with each grind and thrust onto his fingers, the waves of pleasure coming from your clit has your stomach tightening.Â
âB-BuckyâŠâ you whisper and he swallows your words with a deep moan. Your walls clench around the intrusion of his fingers, moreso when he adds a third, curling them as if to beckon your body furthermore to his touch, to yield your fears and let him set alight that bloom inside your core and unto your bliss.Â
You pant harder, âBângh⊠Bucky⊠th-there.â
âRight there?â He asks with a sultry grin. Your voice comes out in a strangled response. âMâmhm.â
The voice of your whine is his commandment. He installs a level of dedication at gently fucking you with his fingers right where you needed him â wanted him. That swell inside you grows and grows, furthering into a maelstrom that leaves your body shivering, unexpected of where this sudden burst will implode.Â
âGood girl, youâre doing so well, doll,â he praises with a low timbre, groaning with a prided grin when you tug a little harder at his hair, your softer nature betraying to act out this darker side of yourself; this almost forbidden wanton.Â
I feelâŠ
Your hips move to become greedy and much to Buckyâs approval, feeling the swollen bulge of his cock straining against his boxers has you weak and some instinct to move against it drives you, a louder moan slipping past your lips. Buckyâs mouth leaves a heated trail of passionate nips and teasing flutters of kisses against your neck, spoiling you.Â
You gasp and your hands fly to his shoulders to hold you at bay, the sudden shockwave a prelude to ride as your orgasm ascends upon you, he hears the feverish whimpers you make and he purrs, pumping his fingers, âThatâs it, love, let go. Câmon, let me feel you cum for me. Iâve got you.â
The suppression of a scream hides in your chest, leaving only a choked sob to rack through you as you thrust and claim your first release, a hot flush of white behind your eyes blinds you, your muscles convulse in tensing and relaxing as you ride out your high.Â
Your arms that wound around his shoulders squeeze a little tighter in your recovery, your breath timed to slow down after a few minutes but your body remains to quiver against him. The form of his aroused cock clear and unhidden has your core weeping for more.
âThere you go, thatâs it,â he coaxes softly with a smile while he eases a kiss to the corner of your lips, âhowâre you feeling?âÂ
âG-good⊠really like⊠wow.â The words come out jumbled to you, as if you were still influenced by the strong wine at the reception, having made you reserve your consumption to a very limited amount.Â
Bucky hums and withdraws his fingers, leaving you to mewl at the loss. The sight before you has you in some chokehold, a crimson heat flushes into your cheeks and down your neck, rendering your blood into fiery rivers beneath your skin, a sudden jerk picking up in your heartbeat as Bucky cleans the slick of your release from his fingers, the crystalised shade of blue dimming with a certain darkness as the taste of you rolls over his taste buds.Â
Heâs tasting meâŠ
He moans with a thunderous growl. âFuck⊠you taste amazing,â he grins, teeth gleaming with that cute, charming esteem.Â
I do?
The warmth in your cheeks glows ten fold, bringing a sight for Bucky to admire. That cute girl whoâs face becomes rosy with embarrassment. Itâs like he could read your mind and the way he says your name has you at a loss of breath, drawing your attention back to the shine of his eyes.Â
âYou are exquisiteâŠâÂ
Following in action as the continuation of his proclamation, his hand finds the spine of your dress and upon reaching the apex between your shoulders. He seeks to pause and his eyes seek out your permission, brows slight to bevel. âMay I, Mrs. Barnes?â
The crescents of your palms brush the exterior of his stubble, every inch of your hands covered by the sensational prickling that leaves you like putty. How he stares at you with this amass of love and fondness that feels overwhelming at times.Â
Heâs just so⊠perfect.
The return of tears glasses over your eyes and you smile, brightly and toothy and nod, cupping his jaw in your hands before you press a softened kiss to his lips. You feel it in unison with him; it steals the breath from you both.Â
âYou may, Mr. Barnes.â
With your approval, he draws the zip undone. Anticipation lines your nerves like a trail of gunpowder ready to be set ablaze. Heâs testing the waters, ensuring that this is what you want and when you give no indication of refusal, he glides the dress from your shoulders, revelling in the delicate sculpt of your body; the warm, ambient light hitting the surface creates a heavenly glow upon your skin. With the overhanging light above, it frames a golden halo around you as his sights steer upwards.Â
Your gown drapes a sultry form over you, accentuating the mounds of your breasts pushed close together and the nakedness of your shoulders and neck. Bucky growls under a vice of hunger. But something lays in the glassy waver of his stare.Â
âPlease be real?â
His voice barely rises above a near shattered whisper. A man who fears losing you just much as you fear losing him. His voice pleads with you. Your lips part, jaw coming to drop slightly as your eyes widen.
Please be real for me?
âI-I am, Bucky. Iâm realâŠâ
The man before you exhales loudly, gasping for breath to keep himself drowning. âGood. Because I want this to be real.â
He doesnât waste another moment. His mouth clashes against yours, hunger succumbing as he ravishes you with the heated intensity of his kiss, tongue running a pleaful line along your bottom lip. You part them and he awakens the stir of arousal flooding through your veins, tongues dancing in an artistic battle for dominance he undeniably wins. You moan a muffled song and he drinks every lyric of it, intoxicated by it.Â
His hands are wild in their exploration, peeling your dress lower to reveal the laces and frills of your lingerie, not permitting you to shy away and hide from him this time, his hands feel every inch of it, mesmerised by the way it fits to you so beautifully that even the most talented of sculptures would struggle to capture your raw and enticing beauty to its complete and apex design.Â
Your hands scour to claim the roots of his hair again. This time, you hold no restraint and he loves it. He loves the radiance of confidence you find in every following second. You are claiming what is rightfully yours as his wife. As his one love that he will kill and die for without question. Though time and mortal breath dares to intrude and part you, you find ways around the schemes, momentarily gasping for air within the clash of your lips, too far entranced to pull away.Â
His hands glide up your sides until his thumbs are able to tease your stiffened nipples through the thin fabric, groaning at the noises you create from it, his touch sending those blissful tingles throughout your body. When time comes to see you both departed from your kiss, you each still remain to linger, tasting one another in the inch spared between you, chests heaving madly and brushing together. Dress pooled to a rolled belt over your waist, Bucky drinks in every detail of your body.Â
Why does he look at me like that?Â
His nose buries into you, nestling into the warmth and softness of your body as he utters phrases of praise to your skin, a trail of his devotion painted upon your skin with the invisible ink of his love and adoration for you.Â
âYou feel what you do to me?â he asks, strong hands guiding your hips down to roll in unison with his, the swollen mound of his erect cock still suffering in confinement has you hiccuping in your stun.
Though your voice is light, you nod as you answer. âYes.â
âThatâs how fucking hot you are,â he says with a deep, velvety drawl, his words slightly muffled by the way his mouth caresses you. âYou have me so hard right now, fuck, the things I wanna do to you, doll.â
His confession has you blushing.Â
He canât possibly mean thatâŠ
He canât help himself. Heâs a man enslaved at your whim. Though you try to bring this madman to his senses with an embarrassed huff of his name, he only leans in to claim your lips with his, the melding of hunger brings you both into that feverish haze again. Tongues entangled with one another, Buckyâs hands paw and pluck the garments of your lingerie from your form, peeling away the details of floral patterns and lacy sheer to feel the heat of skin below, the way your muscles twitched under his touch.Â
You moan between the kiss and allow your hands to feel the soft tresses of his hair between your fingers, carefully weaving through the darkened locks and nails scratching at the roots against his scalp, a rumbling purr escaping him.Â
The rock of your hips move together, a desiring fire burning in your core to the point it borders on a painful ache between your legs. Your dress is discarded, left aside with your undressed garments to be reclaimed at a later time. He lays you on your back, your head nested atop the plush cushion of the pillows, bodies flush together without leaving so much as a morsel of space apart.Â
Entrapped by his lustful kiss, you thrust and grind your heated sex against him with shocking eager, a whine is tugged from your throat, unsure.
Bucky is quick to assure you of your arousal, that its intoxication is a vice wanted. He uses one arm to support his weight above, caging you, as his other takes hold of your thigh and gropes at it fervently while somewhere in the mixture haze his boxers are tossed aside. His swollen tip oozes with glistening, droplet streams, his size heavy and long that has a gasp escaping you.Â
Wâwill he fit?
Such worrisome thoughts are snuffed out like speckled embers as he deepens the kiss, tongues gliding together and moans and limbs entangle. His tip brushes over the sensitive spot of your clit and your hips take languid actions against his practised thrusts.Â
âItâs going to hurt at first,â he mutters across the skin of your jaw, âbut it wonât for long. Iâm right here, moya zvezda, I promise.â
A crystalline glint appears on the waterline of your eyes, a tender smile on your lips as your lips connect with a chaste kiss.Â
âIâm ready, BuckyâŠâ
His blue eyes take the time to carefully read your expression. For a man so immersed in being so gentle and caring with you, you have come to know that with the very same hands he caresses you with â he has broken jaws, bloodied and bruised noses and strangled the very life of more than one person. He can tell when a man is lying just by looking into his eyes.Â
He sees youâre telling the truth. That you want this with him. You want him. Cock nudging at your folds, you push your legs a little wider to better accommodate his size after hearing him chuckle at the crimson blush creeping into your face, flustered at the thought of his entire cock sheathing inside you.Â
âGonna fit all of me, my sexy little wife?â heâd teased with a wink.Â
His eyes retain their focus with yours as he pushes the head of his cock into your cunt, meeting the slight of resistance and surged forward, a sigh heavily laced on his breath that has his head bowing to press his forehead to yours, eyes scrunched tightly.Â
A hitched note on your throat is silenced, cut out with a high pitched whine as he sinks deeper and deeper, breaching past the wall of your hymen. Your nails mark their bite into his shoulders and down his back with angry red scars, tracing over the blackened inks already imprinted there.Â
Your walls constrict around the intrusion of him with a searing pierce that brings your tears to streak down your temples, chin slightly trembling, you feel Buckyâs lips hover over yours.Â
âO-ow,â you mewl, âIt hurtsâŠâ
âIâve got you, zvezda, Iâm here.â
Your chest feels tight, suffocated, but his words comfort you. You cling to him tighter, thighs trembling at his sides and you feel his hand resume its place there, gentle to knead and rub soothing circles as he coaxes you through the blight of your pain.Â
âFuck baby, you feel so good,â he whispers to your lips, the crinkle of a smile forming on his features. Just as quickly as it had come, the pain subsides and you feel so full at the point where your bodies meet, you finally nod for him to continue.Â
He goes slowly.Â
He sets a rhythm paced to ease you into the forcing motion of his cock gliding through your hot, velvety walls that clamp and shudder with each movement he makes. Your gasps turn to softly sung moans as you begin to grind your hips to meet his and he smiles down at you. âThere you go, love. Thatâs it, youâre taking me so well.âÂ
âThis body⊠so perfect, so beautiful⊠I love it, I love you.â
Another moan escapes you. He heaves a deep breath with every thrust, still focusing hard to keep this steadiness, until you moan for him,Â
âBucky⊠please, I-I needâŠâ
âWhat do you need, love? Tell me.â
âIâ need moreâ please.â
He groans, the thought of ruthlessly fucking you with abandon crosses his mind in flashes, the way youâd look spread out while being pummeled by his cock that ruts into your pretty pussy until youâre stuffed full of his cum that it overspills as a creamy ring around his girthy base.Â
To fuck you the way of a mafia lord.Â
âYou want that, sugar?â he asks, his voice sudden to drop lower into a silken, deepened purr with a darkened smirk. âYou want to be fucked the way a mafia queen should be? Hâhmph, you want it harder? Faster?â
You choke on the release of your words, sounding breathless, âY-yes!â
Your walls clench tight around him, a series of moans spilling from your parted lips as he then picks up his pace, the incentive of your permission driving him to thrust harder, his hand fists and squeezes the flesh of your thigh within his grasp, holding you fast to him as he strikes deeply into your pussy. His muscles bend, curve and tense and your hands greedily explore every single portion of him, granting you this chance to be upheld by the prison of your thoughts that may hold you back later.
You howl, whine and cry â all for more, for him to keep going, to not stop. His body arches over yours, hands now ahold of you at the hips he uses the advantage of his strength and position to forcefully piston himself back and forth, back and forth until youâre writhing beneath him Your hands attach themselves to the veiny reins of his wrists, your hips arched up until your lower half is lifted for his leisure to fuck into that spot that has you seeing an galaxy of stars.
âBuckyâ Bucky, oh Bucky!â you cry out.Â
âFuckâ yeah baby, fuck you sound beautiful, shitâ baby, keep screaming my name, I want to hear you.â Each word is intensely laced with an exerted breath or guttural groan. âFucking hell, zvezda, you look fucking amazing like thatââÂ
âYouâre taking my cock so well.â
âIâm never getting over the sight of this.â
His eyes burn with lust at the sight of your breasts bouncing without restraint, the shudder of your body with each clash of your thrusts, how your face contorts so beautifully with pleasure and the holstered grip of your legs hooking around his waist repeatedly only to falter each time after several pumps, only kept upright by his hold. A knot coils inside you, a tidal wave of pleasure coursing through your veins that sets your nerves aflame and your vocal cords to strain with every sound you make. The more and more he slams his cock into you, your neck is forced to arch back against the pillows with a pleasured shriek.Â
You call out to him, âBucky, Iâ Iâm gonna⊠ah!âÂ
âCum for me, doll, I wanna feel how tight your pretty pussy is around me.â Your back arches further as his tip continues to hit that spot and the sensational toying of his thumb rolls on your clit, eliciting a flourish of sparks to ignite until youâre suddenly overcome with a flush of white, that euphoric hit crashing over you while heat pours into every inch of your skin with your eyes rolling back.
You chant his name like a sacred prayer, the meaning of your vows imbued within your slurred, intoxicated mantra. He pants, hot and heavy in your ear,
âShit, shitâ fuuuck, babyâ âmgonna cum, gonna cum for you. I want my seed in you, I want it in you so bad.â
His thrusts increase, the sound of skin slapping skin is erotically loud. You donât want it to stop. You donât want him to stop and so you beg him to keep going.Â
You continue to whine, low and cooing, walls stretching and clenching around him, milking him of his release that sweeps over him with a long, baritone and throaty moan. His head presses into the crook of your neck to suck at the skin of your collarbone, marking you with dark bruises of his love and possession as he paints your pussy with his seed. The air is faintly filled by the sound of oozing slick of your combined orgasms that leak and drip around his still thrusting cock.
The erratic pace in which his rhythm held eventually wanes, instead he moves to a slow-crawling grind to ease you off your combined highs. His chest rises and falls and you allow your eyes to admire his form above you, A balance of skin and ink layered in a thin coating of sweat, as is your own, the muscles of his body rippling with each motion he makes.Â
His hands release from your hips after heâs lowered you back down to the bed, allowing your body to succumb to the exhaustion undoubtedly taking hold of you. Your gaze meets his own, the colour of them haloed by the shine of tears and his heart yearns for you.Â
He fears heâs done something wrong and his hands quickly raise to caress your face, thumbs stroke over your cheeks.Â
âMoya zvezda, are youââ
âIâmâŠâ you trail off, blinking rapidly to see him through the watery veil and you grin up at him and nod. Heâs relieved to see that smile, coming to mirror it himself.Â
Sheâs okay. My girlâs okay.
You reach your hand up, the warmth of your palm contrasted by the cool adornment of your ring. Bucky leans his face into your touch. âYou stayed⊠you didnâtââ Though your words fail you, Bucky sees what you mean to say in your eyes.Â
âOf course. Youâre everything I ever wantedâŠâ Your brows furrow, touched by the sincerity in his words. Before you is a man whose heart is held in your very hands. And his heart is one you wish to cherish, hold dear and never break. To think you almost bargained him off to another womanâÂ
âHave me again tonight, zvezda. Have me any other night. I promise, I will be there every time, every moment.â
He doesnât want a mistress. He wants me.Â
Those voices are gone, replaced by newer, kinder ones.
Youâre perfect.Â
Youâre beautiful.Â
Iâm not scared anymore. Not with him.Â
You now realise that intimacy was never the threat. The voices in your head were.Â
THANKS FOR READING!
â a note from the author, Did you want some tissues?
on this issue's taglist, we've got: @mostlymarvelgirl @hollyseb @sebastianstansqueen @openup-yourmind @kandis-mom @calwitch @cjand10 @identity2212 @ashdoctor @missmarvelophilic @boobsbeesbongos @mrsnikstan @floralwsloki @mcira @schneeflocky @greatenthusiasttidalwave
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky x reader#bucky x you#mafia bucky x reader#mafia bucky barnes#mafia bucky au#bucky x reader angst#bucky barnes x reader smut#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky x reader smut
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updated: 17.02.25
áŻâ
mob!au
Run For Your Life (â€â): he was away from the city for a while, chasing after some bastards who betrayed him. But the traitors were no longer breathing now and Bucky Barnes was finally able to come home to the city he ruled. Mostly, he was excited to come back and see his girl again. However when he got to the strip club where you worked as a waitress, he didnât find you there. They told him you didnât work there anymore. No one knew where you went, or why you left. Nobody even knew your real name. Now it was up to him to search the whole wide world to find a nameless girl â one he was obsessively, mindlessly in love with. (@sinner-as-saint) (warning: stalking tendencies)
Passionfruit (â€â): you spend a well deserved lazy day with your mafia husband and son⊠plus Bucky getting a little handsy. (@kurogxrix)
Look Don't Touch (â€): you accidentally walk onto your husband and his men during a meeting, clad in nothing else but a tight-fitting top and a baby in your arms. The sight is enough to send the many men drooling, but Bucky reminds them that youâre only his to look at, and will always be. (@kurogxrix)
The Alchemy (â€â
â): about a decade ago you left your home and ran away, looking for a fresh start after having had your heart broken by the boy you loved. Now youâre back and turns out Bucky Barnes â the same man who once broke your heart â is adamant on tormenting you some more. But why? Why does he want you back at all cost when he was the one who once pushed you away and crushed your heart like it meant nothing to him? What secrets has he been keeping for almost a decade? Most importantly, what truly happened that night he broke your heart? (@sinner-as-saint) (warning: forced marriage/marriage of convenience, possessive behaviours)
4 Minutes (â): you and Bucky had limited time to spend intimately during the past few days, leaving you both extremely sexually frustrated. When your sonâs occupation offers you 4 minutes of free time, Buckyâs damn adamant on making your legs shake in less than 3. (@kurogxrix)
Protector (â€â§): ironically, the man with blood on his hands and a permanent target on his back was the one youâd never felt safer with. (@cherryrogers) (warning: mild violence, assault, stalking, mentions of illness, death)
Honey, There Is No Right Way (â€â
â): when you agree to be the feared mobster Bucky Barnesâ sugar baby, you expect to get enough money to pay your bills. what you donât expect is to fall head over heels for him. (@bonky-n-steeb)
A Love For The (P)ages (â€): Bucky might be the baddest mob boss in the city but heâs the softest and sweetest husband in the Universe. (@jobean12-blog)
Stealing Hearts (â€â
â): his mansion was highly secured, and yet, breaking in and trying to steal from him was rather easy for a skilled thief like yourself. Key word: trying. Of course you got caught by his men. And the mob boss was known to be ruthless, cold, merciless â the list of his villainy was endless â so you thought heâd end you the moment he laid eyes on a thief like you. However, he didnât. Instead, he made you an unusual offer. One you couldnât resist. (@sinner-as-saint)
Come Home (â€â): Bucky comes home to find you and your son asleep in your bed and his heart damn near explodes with how much he loves his family. And after putting your baby to sleep, Bucky proceeds to show you just how grateful he is to have you and how much he loves youâŠÂ (@sinner-as-saint)
I Am Your Fall (â€â
â): youâre hiding from your past, in Madripoor. You did nothing wrong, other than mix dangerous business with a lot of pleasure. You couldnât go home because⊠he would find you, and Madripoor was the only place he didnât do business, or had any allies or friends. But little did you know that the mob boss had finally found you, after obsessively looking for you ever since you left, and left him in pieces. He didnât want revenge, he just wanted the one thing he had hopelessly fallen in love with; who also happened to be the one who had betrayed him and hurt him more than anyone or any bullet ever did before - you. (@sinner-as-saint)
Fallin' For Ya (â€): Bucky finds himself standing in front of your door with a bouquet of roses, wondering when heâs ever allowed his stone-cold mafia heart to fall in love with you. (@kurogxrix)
Yours To Wield (â€â
â): with the enemy threatening to obliterate your family, youâre left with no choice but to take the hit just so he would spare your loved ones. Belonging to a mafia family requires sacrifices to be made at every step, and in order to save your family you make the ultimate one - you offer yourself up to the enemy. Bucky Barnes isnât a man one negotiates with, he owns this city and whatever he says is considered law. But when you come to him with an irresistible offer, he bends his own rules for you. What starts out as an agreement becomes so much more, and the two of you find love where it wasnât supposed to be. But rare are the love stories which donât include some sort of war. (@sinner-as-saint)
Lover Boy (â
â): it's the Bridgerton carriage scene, but make it mob!Bucky. (@cryptidcasanova)
Starting Over (â€â
): when Bucky throws you out of the house for a betrayal and won't listen to your side of the story, you know the only way out is through - it's time to start over. Maybe this was never going to be your happy ending. (@sashaisready)
Guard Dog (â€â
): Bucky doesn't take too kindly to people hurting his wife. (@auroralwriting)
Adore Her, Dior Her (â€): what good is having all that money if he can't spend it on the woman he loves? (@queers-gambit)
Ending, Beginning (â€â
): after months of physical therapies, Y/N was finally back in town and ready to jump right back into business as usual. Bucky, however, disagreed; he didnât want her anywhere near the club anymore. (@leascorner)
The Threat of Intimacy (â
ââ§): a beautiful bride marrying the man of your dreams. But when faced with what comes after the vows and first dance as Mr. and Mrs Barnes, you suggest that a particular arrangement be made. (@darkdemeter)
Bad Romance (â€â
â): in Brooklyn, everyone knows the unwritten rule: you donât cross James Barnes. When you return after nearly half a decade, things are anything but the same. After the murder of your Uncle, you begin to learn that no one is who they say they are, and that you may have accidentally given your heart to a mobster; The White Wolf of Brooklyn. More dangerous than that, heâs given you his. (@samthemarvelfan)
Promises (â€â
): when your parents are murdered in cold blood, you turn to the most feared man on the east coast for answers. (@preciousbarnes) (warning: graphic depictions of murder)
Suite Spades (â): at the club where you danced it wasnât unusual for you to have regulars, they were normally gross married men but there was one regular that stood out from the rest, your favorite. a grumpy âbusinessâ man with a black metal arm. (@lostalioth)
new! My Devotion (â
ââ§): the one where Bucky doesnât take your breakup well. (@cryptidcasanova)
#marvel fic recs#mcu fic recs#bucky barnes#james buchanan barnes#the winter solider#bucky barnes x reader#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky x y/n#bucky barnes x oc#bucky x oc#bucky barnes fic recs#bucky fic recs#mob!bucky#mafia!bucky#mob!bucky barnes#mafia!bucky barnes#mafia!bucky barnes x reader#mafia!bucky barnes x you#mafia!bucky barnes x y/n#mob!bucky x reader#mob!bucky x you#mob!bucky x y/n#ailodaâs recs#mob!bucky x oc
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Lost In You
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x female reader (Mob/Mafia AU)
Word Count: 1.8K
Summary: Bucky's been too busy lately and you're missing him badly so you do something to get his attention and it works...
Author's Note: The picture below was too much to handle and gave me Mob feels and I do love writing him with a soft edge, which I hope comes across here. There isn't much back story, lately I can't do much more than focus on the action LOL Thank you all so much for reading! Much love always! â€ïžâ€ïžâ€ïžDivider by the lovely @firefly-graphics thanks a bunch Daisy!đ„°
Warnings: tension, masturbation over the phone (bc where the hell is your man!), soft moments in between the smut


Itâs been the longest week of your life. Buckyâs beenâŠbusy and youâve had enough and youâre just about to tell him so when your phone buzzes in your hand.
âDonât forget what I want tonight. Make sure you eat dinner doll. Iâm going to be keeping you up.â
You huff out a small laugh at his text message. Heâs been keeping you up all week and while youâd never complain you would like him to be more available.
With slightly shaky hands, you press his name to call him, and wait while it rings onceâŠtwiceâŠ
âIs everything all right?â he asks immediately.
âJames,â you purr. âAre you busy?â
Silence greets you across the line and after several long beats, he clears his throat, quietly.
âDoll,â he says, âyou know you shouldnât be calling me right now unless itâs absolutely necessary. Iâm in the middle of something. What do you need?â
His voice is low. Stern and laced with irritation at the interruption.
Your hand slides down your torso, over your belly button and lower, between your spread legs.
âI miss you,â you pout into the phone. âBut if you canât talk I can call back at a better time.â
You can almost imagine the way he leans in, pressing the phone flush to his ear and listening carefully for every sound on the other end of the line.
âNo, Iâm here now. I miss you too doll.â
Your hand slides up and back, fingers pressing into your skin. You pretend itâs his hand and heâs hovering over you, watching your expression.
âWhen are you coming home?â you start, your breath catching when you hear him exhale forcefully.
âDoll,â he whispers, and now you know he must be alone in his office, having silently gotten rid of anyone else. His voice has gone hoarse, goading, deep enough that if he were here you can just imagine the way his eyes would darken with intent.
âWhy wonât you let me come see you.â
You try to keep your words steady but your fingers are moving faster now, sliding easily over skin that has grown slick with the sound of his voice, the sound of his breath through the phone.
You imagine him behind his large and ornate desk, his jaw tight, his hand clutching himself through his zipper.
Just the thought makes you gasp.
âYouâre a distraction,â he hisses, and you moan quietly without meaning to.
âAre you being a distraction right now doll?â he asks.
Your back arches off the pillows, sensation pooling and warming in your thighs, low in your stomach.
âDo you want to hear me?â you ask. âDo you like thinking of me doing this in our bed?â
âAre youâŠâ he growls. âDollâŠâ
You remember the way he looked at you this morning before he left. You remember how his mouth felt on your neck when he climbed into bed last night.
And then, when you barely whisper, âoh god,â you hear his rumbling groan on the other end and completely fall to pieces under your own hand, pretending itâs his, knowing how much better it will feel when it really is his, later.
Your legs are shaking and youâre crying out into the phone, riding through the wave of heat, slick pleasure sliding across your skin. You say his name, some other things youâre not even sure are coherent but just knowing heâs listening, and itâs all he can do- he canât touch you or feel you-prolongs your release until youâre spent.
âDoll.â
You blink with a swallow. âBuckyâŠIâŠâ
âDonât you dare move,â he warns. âIâm coming home.â

Youâve drifted off waiting for him when the door slams open, the knob hitting the plaster of the wall just on the other side of the bedroom. Startled, you sit up, grasping the sides of his button down and covering yourself as he storms into the bedroom.
âThere you are,â he whispers, his voice too low and steady and you know youâre in for it.
He stalks toward you, stopping at the side of the bed and running a hand through his already mussed hair.
âDid you think that was a good idea doll?â
You push up onto your knees, sliding your hands up his chest and into the open buttons at the top by his neck.
âI didnât know how else to get your attention.â
He closes his eyes, moving his fingers to your jaw, down your neck to push his button down off your shoulders. His hands slide over your breasts before he pulls his hands back, forming tight fists.
âYou donât think youâre the only thing on my mind all dayâŠand night,â he says. âI count the minutes until I can come home to you.â
âBut youâve been gone so much this week. The late nights arenât enough.â
He leans in and says, âIâve had a lot of business to attend to and tonight especially.â
âIâm sorry,â you whisper, as you lean in to meet him, your lips brushing along his neck.
His eyes flutter closed, nostril flaring.
âWhat do you think it looks like. Me running off?â
With his eyes anchoring yours, and to make his point, he slides a rough hand lower, between your legs, two fingers searching and finding you soaked.
âWho made you this wet?â
You donât answer, closing your eyes and pushing into his hand before reaching to grip his wrist and fuck his fingers if he wonât move.
He jerks his arm back and pulls his fingers away, reaching to push them into your mouth, pressing your taste onto your tongue. His hand grips your jaw, fingers curled into the hollow of your cheeks to hold your mouth open.
âAnswer me.â
âYou.â The word is hard to get out around his intrusive fingers, but you manage, and he pulls back, gently rubbing the pad of his thumb over your bottom lip.
âYouâre all I think about,â you say as you stare up into his eyes, so intense with desire.
They soften as you continue to hold his gaze. His eyes drop to your lips and his hands spread gently at your waist.
âI donât care that youâre busy and had to leave. I want you to ignore it.â
His jaw tenses.
âI want you.â
âDoll,â he breathes out before his lips crash over yours, tongue pushing your mouth open, tasting, rolling up against your teeth.
You greedily reach for his shirt, tugging it free of his pants. With shaking fingers, you work each button free and once his smooth, warm torso is exposed, you let out a fevered moan and your hands are frantic across his skin, your fingers catching on the gold chain that rests there.
He growls when you spend too long running your hands up and over his chest, stroking and teasing the line of hair heading down below his belly button and into his pants.
Impatiently, he tugs at the shirt thatâs still draped half over your body, pushing his hips forward, and grunting his approval when you quickly unfasten his belt, his zipper and shove his pants down his thighs so you can free his cock.
Oh.
It rests warm and thick against his belly and when you reach for him heâs steel in your hands. You use both to grip him and slide them down his length, dipping your head so you can suck on him with as much hunger as you feel.
He exhales a tight groan as you pump him in your fist and then curls down, capturing your mouth in a brutal, commanding kiss. You pull away, intending to lick him until he comes, but with a growled curse he pushes you back on the bed, kicking off his pants and climbing over you.
With hands flat on your thighs he spreads your legs, leaning forward and roughly thrusting into you. Itâs a relief so enormous you moan loudly, never before feeling so full of him. Youâre starving and satisfied, wanting him to stay like this forever.
He pulls back and then slams forward, gripping the headboard for leverage and taking you so roughly each thrust forces air from your lungs.
Itâs wild and frantic, his body over yours, your legs clamped around his waist.
âI needed to get this deal done tonight,â he hisses, hands gripping your thighs. He pumps hard and fast, sweat trickling down his temple. âInstead, I need to come home and deal with my needy wife.â
His large, rough hands reach for your breasts, and he slides his thumbs across your nipples.
âPlease make me come,â you whisper hoarsely. âPlease,â you beg. âIâll be good.â
You know he canât deny you anything. Not really. Heâll give you everything you want. Always. And thatâs exactly what he does when he angles your hips and drops his hand between your legs, pressing a finger to your clit until you feel the rush of warmth along your skin and the tension build deep in your belly.
âBucky,â you cry out as your pussy tightens around him and your body arches beneath him.
The sight of you so lost in him is too much and he thickens inside you before filling you up, his hips stuttering and slowing.
He carefully pulls out and falls to the bed, wrapping you up in his arms and burying his head in the side of your neck.
âBaby doll,â he murmurs, his lips warm and soft at your skin.
âYouâre not leaving again right?â you ask quietly.
His hand slides along your waist to your stomach where he reaches for yours and tangles your fingers together.
âNo doll face. Iâm not going anywhere.â
He lifts your hand to his lips, kissing your palm and then turning it over to press a kiss to your wedding ring. His mouth moves across your knuckles then to each fingertip and you shiver in his arms.
âIâm not going anywhere,â he says again, rocking behind you and pushing his thigh between yours.
You start to move against it, the friction from his hard muscle making you grip his hand tightly. When he feels your wetness coat his skin he purrs into your ear, pushing your body down harder onto his thigh.
And just when you feel yourself nearing the edge he pulls his leg away. You whine out his name but with quick hands he rolls you onto your stomach, spreads your legs, and slides in so deep you gasp.
His groan vibrates across your skin, his lips warm and soft at your neck before he whispers along the shell of your ear, âI need to feel you come around me again.â

#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x you#bucky x reader#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes imagine#sebastian stan#mob!bucky#mafia!bucky barnes x reader#mob!bucky x reader#mob au#sebastian stan x reader
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mafia!bucky finds your vibrator⊠18+ below the cut!
âah, ah, ah, whereâd you think youâre going?â bucky keeps you in place with his metal arm, moving the suction vibrator back over your swollen clit.
you cry out at the overstimulation. youâve already come three times and your clit throbs at the vibrations, begging for some reprieve. your wetness slides down your pussy and pools onto the bedsheets below.
âyouâre not being very grateful. i thought you liked this thing? thought it made you feel good?â
âitâs for when youâre away,â you repeat, jolting when he turns up the setting. âi promise! i only use it when youâre away!â
âbut you know youâre not allowed to touch yourself when daddyâs gone, baby,â bucky angles the toy until youâre practically sobbing from the sensation. âbet you even charged this to my credit card like a dumb fucking whore.â
your cheeks heat up because heâs right. bucky tsks, clicking the button until the vibrator is on the highest setting. you come immediately, eyes rolling into the back of your skull as you let out a long moan.
he doesnât give you a chance to catch your breath and keeps the toy pulsing away at your clit. your hips buck against his arm, but he growls against your ear, âiâm not finished with you yet. youâre going to be a good girl and come for me again.â
he makes you come over and over until the toy dies half an hour later. by then, youâre a shaking mess and your clit stings from the amount of orgasms youâve experienced.
when he starts making his way between your thighs, you look at him in confusion.
âcanât leave it on an odd number, baby,â he tells you, looking up at you with a smirk. âbesides, donât you think my tongue is better than that silly toy?â
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes smut#mafia!bucky barnes x reader#mafia!bucky barnes smut#bucky smut
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Coffee and Crime Series Masterlist
Pairing ⊠mafia!bucky x reader
A/N ⊠All the parts of my series Coffee and Crime
THIS IS AN 18+ SERIES, MDNI
Last Updated: 03/12/2025
PART ONE
PART TWO
PART THREE
PART FOUR
PART FIVE
PART SIX
PART SEVEN
PART EIGHT
PART NINE
PART TEN COMING SOON
â©âË.ââŸââșââ§â©âË.ââŸââșââ§â©âË.ââŸââșââ§â©âË.ââŸââșââ§â©âË.ââŸââșââ§
TAGLIST IS CLOSED FOR THIS STORY
#bucky barnes fluff#bucky barnes smut#bucky x reader fluff#bucky x reader smut#bucky barnes x y/n fluff#bucky barnes x y/n smut#mafia!bucky x reader#bucky barnes#winter soldier#bucky x reader#bucky x you#bucky x y/n#bucky x female reader#bucky x female yn#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky fanfic#bucky fanfic au#james bucky barnes#james barnes#james buchanan barnes x reader#james buchanan barnes#mafia!bucky barnes x reader#mafia!bucky x y/n#mafia!bucky barnes x y/n#mafia!bucky#mafia!james buchanan barnes#mafia!au#mob!bucky#mob!bucky x reader
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for so long as you live



pairing: mafia!bucky barnes x female reader
summary: the fearsome boss of new york city's russian mob proves a point about who you belong to
warnings: 18+ content (minors dni!!!), very mild dubcon, intoxication, fingering (f receiving), public play, finger sucking, choking, breathplay, very mild blood kink, dacryphilia, dirty talk, praise kink, pet names (printsessa), very possessive bucky
word count: 2.0k
a/n: i wrote this for @the-slumberparty's emoji game using these: đâ€ïžđ„ i hope the plot twist in this actually works (idk if it counts as a PLOT twist but whatever). i just hope it's surprising but still makes sense!!! also all the russian words are from google translate so if any are wrong, let me know and i'll fix them (translations are down at the bottom because one is a spoiler!) anyway i hope y'all enjoy!!
It was a warm summer night in New York City, the kind where even the breeze was pleasant enough that you didnât resist when a balmy gust slipped beneath the hem of your short white dress and slid up your legs, tickling the soft skin of your thighs.Â
Neither did you resist when the breeze was chased by the searching hand of Bucky Barnes, his fingers skimming up your smooth skin as he curled his body around yours in the back booth of the late night Brooklyn pizza parlor.
The front door of the shop was open, and all manner of drunken Brooklynites traipsed over the threshold, intent on ordering a greasy slice that would soak up some of the alcohol in their stomachs. The crowd was loud and rowdy and thankfully unobservant, because you were painfully aware that any one of them could very easily catch you with Buckyâs hand up your skirt.Â
The back booth wasnât nearly dark enough, nor secluded enough to hide you entirely from view, but the insistent desire and warming liquor pounding in your blood made it difficult to care.Â
Buckyâs fingers slid another inch up your thigh, pressing between your soft curves until they found the wetness that had dripped from your folds and made a mess under your skirt. His rumbling chuckle felt like another warm, summer breeze, suffusing you in a heat that burned from the inside out.Â
Your thighs fell open of their own accord, giving Bucky unfettered access to the place that ached for his touch, even as a protesting whine worked its way up your throat.
âBuckyâŠâ you mewled, your reticence clear in your tone. Your fingers closed around the sinewy forearm that was disappearing up your skirt, intent on pulling him away from your soaking heat. Your nails dug into his golden skin when his other hand darted out and grabbed you by the throat.Â
With his thumb pressed to the hinge of your jaw, he turned your face to him, a warning sparkling in his ice blue eyes. A thrum of fear and excitement churned low in your belly at the way Bucky was looking at youâlike you were prey, and he was a predator who had already decided he was going to eat you for dinner.
âI hope you werenât about to tell me not to touch this pussy, printsessa,â Bucky rumbled, his voice deep and low like an oncoming thunderstorm. His hand wedged between your thighs beneath your skirt, shoving your legs wider so that he could cup your bare heat in his palm. âI hope you havenât forgotten who this cunt belongs to.âÂ
Your breath was coming in short, rabbity pants, your heart racing in your chest and your blood pounding in your veins like you were running for your life. But your mind knew what your body did notâit would be pointless to run from Bucky Barnes.Â
The Zimniy Soldat was the most feared boss in the cityâs Russian mafia, a fact youâd learned the hard way when your father had paid off his debts by giving you to Bucky.Â
Buckyâs gaze bore into your own as he pushed two fingers into your tight channel, his eyes watching hungrily as your face went slack with pleasure.Â
âIâll touch you whenever I want,â he growled, dragging his fingers back and plunging them into you again slowly, his eyes never straying from your face. âIâll fuck you whenever I wantâwhere ever I want.âÂ
His other hand held you pinned to the leather booth by your throat, your body responding so eagerly to his touch that it felt like a betrayal. His thumb and forefinger pressed into the sides of your neck making your pussy spasm around his fingers.Â
Your body proved Buckyâs point before he made it as he rumbled, âThis cunt belongs to me, printsessa.âÂ
You hadnât said a word since his name, but your slow submission was clear in every little movement of your bodyâyour thighs spreading even wider for Buckyâs hand, your limbs loosening and melting into his hold, your lips falling open in a soundless moan as he fingerfucked you. Bucky owned you, and you both knew it.Â
And he relished your submission, even if you hadnât quite accepted his possession of you yet. But you would.
The victorious smile that curved Buckyâs mouth was sharp and dangerous as a knife. When he spoke, though, his voice was as warm as the balmy summer breeze.Â
âGood girl,â he murmured, âgive yourself to me.â The ice in his eyes was slowly but surely melting as he watched pleasure dance across your face, his smile widening into something hot and hungry. âThis life of yours is mine now, printsessa, but if youâre a good girl for me, I can make sure itâs filled with pleasure and happiness,â he purred, his lips brushing against the apple of your cheek, their softness followed by the rough scrape of his scruff.Â
Bucky slid a third finger into your tight hole, stretching you wider and making you bite your lip hard to prevent yourself from crying out in pain-edged pleasure. Your chest heaved with the effort to stay quiet and, unbidden, a tear slipped from the corner of your eye while blood pooled on your lip.Â
But Bucky never stopped fucking you with his fingers, his hand working your body expertly as the soft, wet sounds of your obscenely sopping cunt reached your ears. Instead, the Zimniy Soldat kissed the tear from your cheek and licked the blood from your swollen lip, pulling back to stare into your eyes as he watched you come undone for him.Â
âYou are mine,â he said with a tone of finality, as if his statement was an incontrovertible fact. Any protest you mightâve hadâthough in truth, you didnât have any leftâdied in your throat as he choked you harder, his fingers working your pussy faster, grinding the heel of his palm into your wet, puffy clit as he continued on, pushing you to the edge of your release. âMoya printsessa, moya zhena.âÂ
You felt Buckyâs ringâyour husbandâs ringâsmooth and unyielding and warm from his skin, slip inside your cunt as he buried his fingers in your body. He rubbed your clit ruthlessly until he made you come right there in the back of the pizza parlor, not caring if anyone in the crowded shop could see it.
Your left hand, bedecked in a dazzling white sapphire ring and matching wedding band, wrapped around the back of Buckyâs neck, your nails digging into his skin as you clung to the most dangerous man in all of New York City while he made you come harder than you ever had before. Pleasure tore through your body as you held Buckyâs warm blue gaze, staring at the man whoâd staked his claim on you.
The man youâd married only a few hours prior because it was the only way to settle your fatherâs debts.
âGood girl, good fucking girl,â Bucky growled, his fingers fucking you through your orgasm, his eyes watching you hungrily, greedily.
Already, you could read him well enough to know he was thinking about watching you come on his cock as he claimed you in the most base, primal way possible. Your pussy clenched harder on his fingers at the thought, your body aching for it even as you came.
âCome all over your husbandâs fingersâsee how good I can be to you when you obey me, printsessa.âÂ
Your teeth had sunk deep into your lower lip to quell any sounds of ecstasy, but the pleasure was too much, too overwhelming, and you threw your head back. Your breathy cry was muffled by Buckyâs fingers choking your throat harder, which only wrung even more bliss out of your body as black crept into the edges of your vision.Â
Wave after wave of pleasure crashed over you, your husbandâs relentless touch dragging out your release until your strangled moans devolved into desperate whimpers. Tears gathered in your lashes, and your entire body trembled in the red leather booth at the back of the pizza parlor.
Only then did Bucky relent. âThatâs my good girl,â he murmured before his lips slammed down on yours, his mouth claiming yours just as surely as his fingers had claimed your cunt.Â
He swallowed the keening whine you let out when he pulled his fingers from your throbbing pussy, your body aching at the loss of him. But then he replaced his mouth with them, pushing his fingers between your lips so you could taste your releaseâthe release heâd wrung so masterfully from your body.
âClean up your mess, moya zhena,â Bucky rumbled, his eyes sparkling with depraved delight as you dutifully licked his fingers clean.
When he decided you were done, he wrapped an arm around your shoulders and let you collapse against his chest, your cheek pressed to his white cotton dress shirtâthe one heâd worn to your wedding earlier that day.Â
His jacket had been shed at some point during the party at one of his nightclubsâa club decorated in neon red hearts. Bucky had smirked in amusement when youâd pointed out the irony of celebrating your forced marriage in a place where the theme was love.Â
That infuriating smirk had made you decide the best way to celebrate your sham nuptials was to drink and dance the night away. Youâd spent your night trying not to notice how handsome the mob boss youâd married was, or how delicious he looked with his sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Or how a very small part of you enjoyed the way his eyes never strayed from you for long.Â
It had been your idea to get some pizza after the club, a last ditch attempt to put off the wedding night you were certain Bucky expected. You kept telling yourself you didnât want him to touch you, but the second his fingers had grazed your bare knee beneath the simple white dress you wore, tingles of pleasure going straight to your clit, youâd known it was no use pretending you didnât want your new husband.Â
When your father told you heâd arranged for you to marry the Zimniy Soldat in exchange for having his debts cleared, you never believed you could find anything to like about your mob boss husband. But Bucky had proven you very wrong in that back booth in the pizza parlor, and you were warming up to the idea of being Mrs. James Buchanan Barnes.
âTell me youâre mine, printsessa,â Bucky rumbled, drawing your thoughts back to the present moment. His lips pressed a soft kiss to the crown of your head where it was tucked under his chin, and your heart flipped happily in your chest.
The words were no less a command for the warmth in his tone that he seemed to reserve for only you, his new wife.Â
Perhaps it was because of the pleasure still thrumming through your body, or because you werenât so convinced anymore that being married to the Zimniy Soldat would be a bad thing, but the words came much easier to your lips than you wouldâve expected.Â
âIâm yours, my husband.âÂ
A pleased sound rumbled in Buckyâs throat and you felt the way his heart beat harder in his chest with your cheek pressed to his sternum. You couldnât help the small smile that curved your lips when Bucky threaded the fingers of his left hand through yours, your matching rings slotting next to each other and glittering beneath the yellow lights of the pizza parlor.
âYouâll be happy with me,â Bucky promised, the most recent of many vows heâd made to you that day. His words rang with determination and an emotion youâd never expected to hear from the mob bossâadoration. âSo long as you always remember you belong to me, moya zhena.âÂ
A shiver of delight raced down your spine at his possessive words, finding yourself liking them much more than you wouldâve thought.Â
Something told you that youâd never forget you belonged to Bucky Barnes. Not at any point during the hopefully long and happy life you were going to live with him. You were his wife, and he was your husband, for so long as you both should live.
translations:
printsessa/moya printsessa - princess/my princess
Zimniy Soldat - Winter Soldier
moya zhena - my wife
#bucky barnes#bucky barnes fanfiction masterlist#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x reader#mob bucky barnes#mob au#mafia bucky barnes#mafia au#bucky barnes mob au#bucky barnes mafia au#mob boss bucky barnes#mob bucky barnes x reader#mafia bucky barnes x reader#sebastian stan#sebastian stan smut#sebastian stan fanfiction#sebastian stan characters#witchywithwhiskeywork#the-slumberparty#sleepover game#navy and roo's sleepover
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Trouble in Mind

Summary: Las Vegas, 1952. James Buchanan Barnes is the newest, and youngest, Capo in town. But amid the glitz and shadows of the Strip, he never expects to find you, the beautiful singer who vanished from his life six years ago without a trace. Bucky wants you back. And he wants answers. But you're only willing to give him one of those things.
Pairing: Mafia!Bucky Barnes x Lounge Singer!Reader
A/N: This is an absolute fever dream inspired by #BuckyBarnesBirthdayBingo by @avengers-assemble-bingo. This fulfills the square: Mafia Bucky.
I went back to 50's Vegas because I need another world to get lost in. This is a little longer because this world is so fetch. I can't quite decide if he is going to be dark!Mafia! Bucky after this. Let me know what you think! Please reblog, comment, and like!
Warnings: 18+ Only, Minors DNI. Read at your own risk. Angst. Lots of cigarette smoking, longing, forbidden romance, Steve and Sam (they are warnings!), Bucky is an ass, cocky Bucky, smooth talker Bucky, young love, heart break, a slap (which he deserves), rough sex, wall sex, 50's foundation garments, long time no sex, oral (f receiving) squirting praise kink, raw p in v, lies, deceit, and crime, along with 1950's race relations and allusions to Jim Crow. Whew.
I do not have a taglist. Please follow @rampitupandread and turn on notifications to learn when I post! đ
I Do NOT Consent to my work being reposted, translated or presented on any other blog or site other than by myself.
-------
Las Vegas, 1952
Vegas glittered at night.
Neon lights buzzed, the air thick with cigarette smoke and money. And tonight, a set of eyes was watching you that you thought youâd left far behind.Â
You felt his gaze before you even saw him. It burned into you from the darkest corner of the club. The kind of stare that made your skin prickle, which was both a warning and a temptation.
Bucky.
Youâd heard a new Capo was coming to take over the casino, an up and comer from the East Coast, one of the youngest Bosses ever.Â
You never imagined it would be Bucky Barnes.
------Â
Brooklyn, 1946
Bucky saw you before you ever looked his way.
James Buchanan Barnes was fresh out of the war and already sinking into the life waiting for him back home.
The one his mother prayed heâd stay away from.Â
The one he walked into anyway.
The scent of fresh bread drifted from the bakery down the block as Bucky leaned outside the corner store, trading laughs with his boys, cigarette dangling from his fingers, watching the world pass him by.
Then you walked past, on the way to your vocal lessons.
Your head was high, shoulders squared, exuding the kind of confidence that was ingrained. Your dress clung just right, swaying with each step, and Bucky swore he forgot how to breathe.
He knew your type, a daddyâs girl, from a family with expectations. A good girl from Bed-Stuy, the kind who kept her nose clean and didnât look twice at trouble.
Trouble, like him.
Down on the corner, they could hear your voice carry over the city noise, rising like a bird above the clatter of the el train.
Lark. Thatâs what they called you when you werenât listening. Never to your face.
They knew better than to get too close, and Bucky knew better than to look too long.
But he looked anyway.
And when you finally met his eyes, something in you flickered.
Your father had warned you about guys like Bucky Barnes.Â
âYoung punksâ, he called them, hanging outside that shop owned by the local boss. Nothing but dead ends and broken hearts. He told you to keep your head high and your eyes forward, and to remember who you were.Â
And if that warning wasnât clear enough, there was another, unspoken one layered beneath it: Girls like you donât mix with boys like him. Not in this world.
But when Bucky looked at you with those blue eyes, you knew you were already ruined.Â
He found ways to get close.Â
Catching your eye when you passed by, a slow smirk when you looked away too fast. Holding the door open a second too long, letting his fingers brush yours when he handed over your change. Words, always words, low and teasing, dangerous for a girl with a mind like yours.Â
Words were your weakness.
"You gonna keep pretendinâ you donât see me, Doll?" he asked one evening, stepping into your path as you left the bakery.Â
You could smell his cologne and feel his heat and why were you thinking that his lips were nice? What was the tingle in your lower back that you just knew would go away if he touched you there?
You shook your head, remembering you couldnât entertain this.
"You gonna keep acting like it donât matter?" you shot back, heart pounding.Â
You continued on your way but that night you couldnât sleep for thoughts of him.Â
One day, he whistled as you walked by. And that day, you stopped.
"You want a problem, Barnes?"
He smirked, looking you over blatantly and licking his lips.
"A problemâs not what I want, Doll. Just enjoyinâ the view."
That shouldâve been the end of it. But it wasnât.
You shouldâve ignored him. Shouldâve listened to your father. But you didnât.
Because Bucky Barnes had a way of making himself impossible to ignore.
It was stolen glances at first, then hushed conversations on the stoop when the sun was setting. His voice curled around your name, making it sound like something precious. It was the thrill of his hand ghosting over yours, his fingers rough but careful, like he was afraid youâd pull away.
Except you never did.
You knew the risks. You knew people talked. In a world that kept its lines drawn thick and unyielding, Bucky chasing after you was a dangerous thing.Â
But Bucky never cared about lines.
He didn't care when people whispered, when your father tightened the reins, when your friends warned you that even if he wasnât afraid, the world wouldnât be kind.
âYou scared?â he asked one night, his voice soft but steady.
"Of what?"
"Of what happens if you let yourself want this as bad as I do.â
You should have been. But you werenât.
At first, you told yourself it was just curiosity, just a bit of rebellion before you settled down and did what was expected of you. But curiosity turned into something more, something dangerous.Â
Something like love.
Because when he kissed you for the first time, heat pressing against heat in the shadow of an alleyway, you didnât care about the rules. Bucky tasted like smoke and sin and the promise of something reckless. And suddenly, all the warnings in the world didnât matter.
Didnât matter that Brooklyn had unspoken rules. Because Bucky knew what he wanted. And he knew you wanted him back.Â
He savored those stolen nights in dark alleys, the way you melted under his touch, the way you let yourself need him, even if only when no one else could see.
And you knew that it wasnât just about the thrill of sneaking around, or the way he could make your breath hitch with a single look. It was about him, the way he softened when it was just the two of you. The way his fingers traced slow patterns on your skin, memorizing you like you were something sacred.
The way he made you feel like you belonged to him.
Maybe you did. Because you gave him your innocence.Â
But love like that didnât come without consequences.Â
What Bucky hadnât expected, what he hadnât planned for, was how deep heâd fall for you, how much heâd care.
You werenât just a good time. You werenât just a secret thrill. You were it.
The one thing that made the rest of the world fade away.
And maybe thatâs why he didnât see it coming.
One day you were there, warm and real beneath his hands. And the next, you were gone.
No warning. No note. No goodbye. Just vanished, into thin air.
And for six years, he told himself it didnât matter. That if you wanted to leave, then fine. That he wasnât the type to chase ghosts.
But then he saw you again, standing under the lights of a Vegas stage, your voice carving its way through the smoky haze.
And in that moment, Bucky Barnes knew one thing for certain.
This time, he wasnât letting you run.
â-
Vegas, 1952
The man that you had to leave in the middle of the night was sitting in the lounge that you sang in. The man that you dreamed about at night as you sang love songs was right here in the room with you.
And you didnât know how to act.
You should have run. But you didnât.
He was seated in the VIP section, flanked by two other men in sharp suits, but he was the only one that mattered. The way he lounged, cigarette between his fingers, watching you like he never relinquished his ownership of you, made your head spin.
â--
Bucky leaned back in his seat, cigarette burning low between his fingers, letting the familiar hum of the casino settle into his bones: the money, the women, the men who thought they were untouchable.
Las Vegas glowed like sin, neon and greed dripping down its streets. It wasnât Brooklyn, but it had its own kind of pull, its own kind of power. And now, it belonged to him.
It all revolved around him.
But none of it held his attention. Not like you did.
He saw you before you saw him, and for a moment, the world tilted as the air sucked straight out of the room.
Then you stepped onto that stage, looking like something spun from a dream, and for the first time in years, Bucky almost believed in fate.
Heâd spent too long clawing his way up in this world to let anyone, or anything, decide his future for him. But seeing you again? It felt like something supernatural.
Because here you were.
In his city.
Singing like you owned the damn room.
You had changed. Not just older, not just more poised. It was in the way you carried yourself, the way you commanded the stage with a presence that made every other woman in the world fade to nothing.
And your body. It was a marvel, showcased in shimmering fabric that clung to curves he remembered all too well.
Now you had fuller hips and softer edges; your body was made to be held. If he got his hands on you again, he knew there would be more of you to worship, to savor.
You werenât that wide-eyed girl from Brooklyn anymore. And yet, you were still his Lark.
He saw the exact moment you felt his gaze, the subtle tension in your spine, the way your fingers curled just a little tighter around the mic. Even after all these years, you could still feel him.
Then your eyes found him in the dim glow of the club, and Bucky saw it, the sharp inhale, the slight part of your lips, as if you were about to say his name.
It was enough to make his chest ache.
â--
You shouldâve kept walking.
You shouldâve ignored the butterflies in your belly and that tingle in your back that only Bucky Barnes had been able to inspire.
But you didnât.
Instead, after your set, you let your feet carry you straight to his table.
Bucky smirked, his fingers tapping lazily against the glass in front of him.Â
Like he knew you would come to him.
Six years gone, and yet the moment your eyes locked with his, it was like no time had passed at all. But you werenât that girl anymore. And Bucky wasnât that boy.
He was something else now. Something more defined. The suit fit too well, the watch on his wrist cost too much, and the men flanking him sat too still, waiting for his command.
Still, when he looked at you, it wasnât the infamous new Capo of Las Vegas James Buchanan Barnes staring back.
It was him. Your Bucky.
The boy who once kissed you breathless in the back of a borrowed car.
The boy who called you âBabyâ like the word belonged to him.
The boy you left behind in the dead of night, never looking back.
Until now.
âDidnât expect to see you here,â you said, keeping your voice steady.
His smile was the same one that decimated you back in the day.
âFunny,â he said, tapping ash from his cigarette. âI was just thinking the same thing.â
Your stomach flipped, but you didnât let it show.Â
Bucky had always been too good at reading you. Way too good. And then he did something dangerous. He nodded to the empty seat beside him.
âSit with me, Doll.â
The way he said it, low and easy, like it was a foregone conclusion made your body obey like you had long ago. Your fingers twitched at your side. But instead of walking away, you lowered yourself into the seat beside him, your skin prickling with goosebumps under his gaze.
And when he smirked again, just a little, like heâd just won something, your breath hitched.
Because you both knew.
Six years apart hadnât changed a gotdamn thing.
â--
The moment you sat down, you knew youâd already lost something. Maybe the upper hand, maybe your damn mind, but something shifted the second you met his eyes and made the choice to stay.
Bucky took another slow drag from his cigarette, like he was savoring this moment. He exhaled a thin stream of smoke, peering at you through it with those blue eyes, then finally turned to the two men sitting beside him, as if heâd just remembered they were there.
âFellas,â he drawled, tapping his cigarette against the ashtray, âthis here is Trouble.â
Your lips parted slightly, a profane retort ready to go, but before you could snap back, he continued.
âTrouble, this is Steve Rogers and Sam Wilson.â
Steve, the blonde with the sharp blue eyes, nodded at you, his expression unreadable. He was the kind of man who didnât say much but noticed everything.
Sam, on the other hand, smiled a beautiful gap-toothed grin.Â
âTrouble, huh?âÂ
He extended a hand, and you hesitated before taking it, but his grip was warm and firm.
âI gotta say, any woman that can put that look on Barnesâ face is someone I gotta know.â
You arched a brow, tilting your head.Â
âAnd what look is that?â
Samâs grin widened.Â
âLike he just won the jackpot.â
Your stomach tightened, but you kept your face neutral. Instead, you turned back to Bucky, leveling him with a look.Â
âTrouble?â
Buckyâs lips curled, and something wicked danced in his eyes.Â
âYou always were.â
You didnât blink.Â
âAnd you always loved it.â
There was a silence thick with sex between you, and again the other men were forgotten.
Then, Steve cleared his throat.Â
âHow do you two know each other?â
Bucky chuckled darkly, and leaned back in his seat.
âLetâs just sayâŠâ His eyes met yours, heat simmering beneath the surface. âShe used to belong to me.â
The words struck your chest like lightning. Youâd learned enough curse words to set his head on fire since youâd known him last, but you didnât lace the room with profanity.Â
Your fingers curled into a fist in your lap, but you kept your expression steady.Â
You werenât the girl anymore who let Bucky Barnes own her with a smile and a whispered promise in the dark.
So you tilted your head, letting your lips curve.
âUsed to,â you repeated, voice smooth as velvet. âInteresting choice of words.â
Buckyâs smile didnât drop, but he clutched his glass tighter, and you saw the way his jaw ticked.
Sam let out a low whistle, clearly enjoying the show.Â
âDamn. Sheâs quick.â
Steve, ever the observer, just watched the exchange with a smirk.
You leaned in slightly, just enough to make Buckyâs eyes flicker to your mouth and down to your cleavage before he dragged them back up.Â
âIf I remember right, I was the one who left.â
Bucky exhaled a slow breath through his nose, tapping his cigarette against the ashtray again, his voice a shade lower now.Â
âThatâs what you think?â
You raised a brow.Â
âThatâs what I know.â
He made a sound low in his throat before taking another sip of his drink. He gazed at you like he was trying to figure out what to do with you now that you were sitting right in front of him again.
Then his eyes narrowed just a fraction.
âSo tell me, Trouble. If you walked away so easy, why are you sitting here now?â
Thatâs the question, you thought.
So instead of answering, you reached for his glass, plucked it from his fingers, and took a slow sip before setting it back down.
Then you met his eyes and smiled.
âMaybe I just wanted to remind you,â you said softly. âThat you donât own me anymore.â
Bucky stared at you, unreadable. That muscle in his jaw twitched again.
Then, slowly, that wicked smirk crept back onto his face and he tilted his head at you, those blue eyes sparkling.
âWeâll see about that, Lark.â
â----
Bucky watched as you set his glass back down, the ghost of your lipstick staining the rim, taunting him. Six years apart, and you still knew how to get under his skin with a single look, a single move.Â
A single sentence.
Maybe I just wanted to remind you⊠that you donât own me anymore.
You challenged him in ways no one else dared to. And Bucky fucking loved it.
Steve and Sam were watching, though they had the good sense to stay quiet. Sam was chuckling, and Steveâs face held a small crooked smile, one that appeared after Bucky said Lark.
Bucky didnât give a damn about either of them right now.
His eyes stayed on you. You were trying to be tough, but you had to be feeling the same pull that he was. Bucky leaned forward, closing the space just enough to catch your scent and see your pupils blow wider.Â
Gotcha.
âNever needed to own you, Doll.âÂ
His voice was quiet, but there was steel beneath it.Â
âThat was never the game.â
Your lips parted slightly, but you caught yourself, chucking your chin up instead.Â
âThen what was your game, James?â
He smiled again. He wasnât about to hand you that answer.
Yet.
Instead, he sat back, dragging his gaze over you slowly, and licking his lips.Â
You were still the most beautiful thing in the damn room, and you had to know it. That dress, those eyes; every man in this club was probably watching you, and wanting you.
But only one of them had ever had you.
And only one of them was going to again.
He tapped his fingers once against the table before rising smoothly to his feet.Â
âCâmon.â
You blinked, âWhat?â
He nodded toward the back of the club, where the private booths were. Where you two could talk without an audience.
âWalk with me.â
A challenge. A test. A door you could still choose not to open.
Bucky saw you hesitate, for just a moment, but then you stood, smoothing out your dress and holding your head high like you hadnât just made a decision that would change everything.
Buckyâs smirk widened.
Thatâs my girl.
â-
Buckyâs smirk deepened when you stood, like heâd known you would. That alone made something tighten in your chest, but you swallowed it down, lifting your chin as you followed him through the club.
The noise of the club, the conversations, the clinking of glasses, the jazz band, it all blurred as he led you toward the back, past the heavy velvet curtain that separated the VIP section from the private rooms. It infuriated you how easy it was to fall into step with him, how your body remembered before your mind could protest.
The moment you were away from prying eyes, he turned.
âYou still listen like a Good Girl,â he murmured, voice smooth as smoke and just as dangerous.
You crossed your arms, shielding yourself from his stare as he leaned back against the small table between you, eyes skimming the curves of your dress like he had every right to.
âAnd youâre still a little asshole, Bucky.â
His smirk didnât waver. If anything, it deepened. He pulled out a cigarette, tapping it against his lighter before the soft flicker of flame cast his face in gold. He inhaled slow, exhaled even slower.
âI think you know Iâm not âlittle,â Baby,â he said, voice dipping lower. âBet you that cunt still curves to my dick.â
You didnât think. Your palm met his cheek in a resounding slap before you could stop it.
Bucky only grinned.
âYou must wanna see if itâs true,â he murmured, stepping closer, âbecause you know that turns me on.â
Your breath hitched, anger curling hot in your gut, and you turned to leave, but his hand wrapped around your wrist, gentle but firm.
âSorry, Doll.â
You knew he was anything but.
Although he let you go the moment you glared at his hand, the heat of his touch lingered.
âStay,â he said, quieter this time. âI think we need to talk, donât you?â
You lifted a brow. âAbout?â
He studied you like he was searching for the right words.
âYou left Brooklyn.â
It wasnât a question. It was a wound, still fresh after six years.
You met his stare, steady.Â
âI did.â
âDidnât say a damn thing to me.â
You thought of the reason why, of the tiny heartbeat that changed your life forever, and you folded your arms tighter across your chest.
âWould it have mattered?â
Bucky let out a quiet chuckle, shaking his head as he took another drag of his cigarette.
âThatâs cute, Doll.â
His voice was rough.
âYou really think I wouldâve let you go?â
Your stomach clenched, but you didnât flinch.Â
âThat might be why I didnât tell you.â
His jaw ticked, frustration creeping into the lines of his face. He leaned in, forearms bracing against the table, his eyes locking onto yours.
âYou ran. Fine.âÂ
His voice was softer now, laced with something you couldnât name.Â
âBut tell me this. Was it worth it?â
The air left your lungs. You thought of why you ran. What was expected of you. What wouldâve happened if youâd stayed.
Six years of building a life from scratch. Six years of trying to convince yourself you made the right choice. Six years of missing him. Six years of seeing his eyes every day both in your dreams and when you woke.
âAbsolutely.â
Buckyâs gaze flickered, searching your face for something, doubt, regret, a lie. But he didnât find it.
His voice was barely above a whisper when he said, âYou were mine.â
You exhaled slowly.Â
âIâm not sorry for what I did, Bucky. But Iâm sorry if I hurt you.â
You meant it. Every word.
But you belonged to someone else now. Someone more important than James Barnes.
â---
Buckyâs eyes flashed, then he sat back in his seat, appraising you yet again.Â
âItâs okay, Doll. I turned out okay. And here we are, together again.â
âWeâre not together, Bucky.â
He took another drag of his smoke.
âOnly a matter of time, Baby.â
You took a breath, steadying yourself, lifting your chin.Â
âI have another set.â
Bucky smiled at you.
âI know.â
Of course, he knew. He ran this town and he always paid attention, always saw more than you wanted him to.
You stood, ready to walk away, to put some space between the past and the present before you lost yourself in it again. But before you could take a step, something small and cool slid against your palm.
You looked down.
A key.
Buckyâs fingers lingered over yours just long enough to make your pulse jump. He looked into your eyes and leaned down and it was like your lips were connected by magnets.Â
He tasted like whiskey and cigarettes and regrets as his tongue slid into your mouth, establishing ownership yet again.Â
He pulled back and rested his forehead on yours.
âRoyal Sierra Hotel. Top floor,â he gruffed. âIâll be waiting.â
Your breath caught in your throat.
You should have dropped the key right back into his palm. Should have told him no, should have walked away, should have done a thousand things.Â
But you did none of them. You just curled your fingers around the key, just for a second, then slipped it into your dress pocket like it meant nothing.Â
Bucky didnât call you on it. Didnât press. He just smiled, slow and knowing, then stepped back.
âSee you soon, Doll.â
Then he was gone, and you were left standing there, with a key in your pocket and a storm in your chest, knowing damn well you were about to make a mistake.
ââ
Your second set of the night flew by in a blur. Your voice soared through the rafters, full of emotion, carrying the weight of things you couldnât say out loud. The memories all spilled into the songs, wrapped in melodies that werenât yours but might as well have been.Â
You poured your soul into every note, and the crowd felt it. They responded with enthusiastic applause and with generosity for the waitresses and bartenders. At the end of the night, the club manager pressed extra bills into your hand, murmuring something about record-breaking tips.
You barely heard him.Â
Your mind was already made up.
You stepped out into the cool night air, exhaling as you raised your hand to hail a cab, but before you could, a smooth voice cut through the darkness.
âNeed a ride?â
You turned, heels clicking against the pavement as you took in the sight before you.
Steve Rogers, all broad shoulders and quiet authority, leaned against a gleaming black Continental, his arms crossed, his expression unreadable.Â
Your brows lifted.Â
âDidnât peg you for a chauffeur.â
Steve chuckled.
âJust trying to be nice.âÂ
He nodded toward the passenger seat.Â
âWeâll take you wherever you need to go.â
Your gaze shifted past him to Sam, watching you from inside the car, his smile just visible through the window.
âAnd if I need to go home?â you asked, testing.
Steve shrugged.Â
âThen weâll take the lady home. But if youâre looking for a little more excitementâŠâ
âWe know a place or two,â Sam finished, his voice tinged with amusement.
Despite yourself, you smiled. You liked them. Even if they were Buckyâs men, and even if they saw more than they let on.
âIâll take you up on that,â you said, sighing as you stepped forward.Â
âStanding on a stage in heels all night isnât exactly easy on the legs.â
Steveâs gaze flickered down, tracing the slit in your dress, lingering just long enough to make your pulse skip.
âThose legs look just fine to me,â he murmured.
You arched a brow. Was Steve Rogers flirting with you? And was Sam giving you the same once over from the passenger seat?
And more importantly, what would Bucky do if he knew?Â
You didnât have time to wonder. Steve was already holding the door open, waiting. You slid inside, sinking into the plush leather seats, and shot him a tired, knowing smile as he shut the door behind you.
He climbed into the driverâs seat and adjusted the mirror, his eyes catching yours in the reflection.Â
âWhich way, Miss Y/L/N?â
You hesitated.
Bucky was making this hard.
You closed your eyes, reaching back, searching for the girl you were six years ago. The girl who ran. The girl who had every reason to. But she was gone, her memories worn thin, fragile as cigarette paper.
You could stand to make some new ones.
And they would have to last. Because this would only be one night.
âThe Royal Sierra,â you said softly.
Steveâs lips twitched. âYes, maâam.â
âYou two do this often?â you asked as the car rumbled to life.
Steve and Sam exchanged a glance, the kind that spoke volumes.
âIâve known Bucky for three years,â Sam said, voice lighter than his meaning. âAnd Iâve never seen him give a woman the time of daylight.â
You let out a soft laugh.
âItâs nighttime, Sam.â
âExactly,â he said, grinning.Â
âHeâs never introduced me to a dame before. Plenty have tried to get to him through us, but he doesnât let âem. He just shoos âem off like stray dogs.âÂ
Samâs smirk deepened.Â
âBut you? Youâre different.â
Something in your chest tightened. You turned toward the back of Steveâs head.Â
âWhat about you, Mr. Rogers?â
Steve cleared his throat, his hands flexing on the wheel.
âIâve known Buck since we were kids in Brooklyn,â he said after a pause.
âAnd heâs only ever talked about one woman to me.â
The weight of his words settled over you. He didnât have to say it. You knew.
Steveâs voice was softer when he added, âBut he stopped talking about her about five and a half years ago.â
Your heart clenched.
You didnât ask any more questions after that. You just let the city lights blur past the window, let the neon colors bleed together as they carried you to the man waiting at the top of the Royal Sierra.
Waiting for you.
ââ-
The Royal Sierra was a loud kind of quiet. The kind that came from power. Buckyâs kind of place.
Steve pulled up to the entrance, stepping out with effortless authority, like heâd done it a thousand times before. Like he belonged here. Like you belonged here. No one stopped you. No one asked questions.
His presence alone was a key. A shield.
Bucky Barnesâ reach extended farther than Mr. Crowâs.
Before you knew it, you were stepping into the elevator, watching the floors tick by, your pulse a slow, deliberate drum in your throat. And by the time you reached the penthouse, your body had made a decision your mind refused to acknowledge.
You lifted a gloved hand and slid the key into the lock.
The door opened instantly.
And then, there was Bucky.
His gaze collided with yours, stealing the air from your lungs. He didnât move. Just stood there, watching you, burning you into his memory like he was afraid you might disappear if he blinked.
Then his hands were on you.
Your gasp was swallowed by his mouth crashing against yours, desperate and deep, like he had something to prove, like he needed you to know that six years hadnât dulled his hunger for you.
You melted, even though you knew better.
You knew this was dangerous. That this wasnât just about lust, or longing, or the years between you. But none of it mattered as you wound your arms around him, tangling your fingers in the dark curls you missed too damn much.
Bucky groaned, dragging you flush against him. His hands roamed lower, exploring this new version of you, the one with fuller curves, wider hips, a body that had known things he hadnât been there to witness.
He needed to erase it all.
He deepened the kiss, his breath ragged as he backed you against the wall, pinning you there, swallowing the soft sound you made.
God, that sound.
He had dreamed about it.
You pulled back. Your lips were swollen, your breath uneven, you were beautiful. But there was something else in your eyes.
A flicker of hesitation.
Bucky smirked.
He didnât want to talk. Not tonight. He wanted to taste you, to relearn every inch of you.Â
He brought your hand up to his mouth, taking the glove off your hand with his teeth, one finger at a time.
Your mind short circuited, forgetting what you wanted to say, the only thought that your panties would burst into flames, but the liquid at your center would surely put the fire out.
Bucky Barnes was still so goddamn hot.
âYou staying?âÂ
His voice was hoarse with desire.
Your lips parted slightly. Then, slowly, you nodded. That was all he needed.
With deliberate slowness, he backed you toward the couch, his blue eyes never leaving yours.
He didnât know why you left.
Didnât know why you were in Vegas.
Didnât know how long he had.
And tonight, he wasnât asking.
"Missed this," he murmured against your throat, his breath hot, his fingers digging into the roundness of your ass. His voice sent a shiver down your spine.
He turned you, fingers finding the zipper of your dress. You felt it slide down, the cool air kissing your bare skin as the rich fabric slipped from your shoulders, revealing the decadent silk and lace beneath.
Bucky let out a rough exhale.
The longline bra molded perfectly to your curves, the underwire and boning lifting your breasts high, the lace trim barely concealing your peaked nipples. The silk garter belt cinched your waist, accentuating the swell of your hips, its straps fastened to sheer stockings that clung to your legs like a whisper.
Bucky groaned low in his throat, his hands ghosting over your sides, gripping, kneading.Â
âJesus, Doll⊠you always did know how to drive me fuckinâ crazy,â he rasped.
He trailed a finger along the edge of your bra, teasing you through the lace with his knuckles grazing the soft swell of your breast.Â
âLook at you⊠all wrapped up like a goddamn present,â he muttered, voice thick with reverence.
His hands slid down, and his thumbs traced slow, reverent paths along the edge of your garter, then lower, teasing the sensitive skin of your thighs. He tilted his head, lips curving against your jaw.
âBeen dreaminâ about this,â he whispered, voice dripping with possession.Â
âAnd now itâs real.â
You shivered beneath his touch, and Bucky smirked, satisfied. He trailed his fingers lower, slipping beneath the garter belt to palm your ass, squeezing greedily, pulling you flush against him.
âMissed these fuckinâ curves,â he groaned, rolling his hips against you, letting you feel just how hard he was, how much he needed you.
He was losing patience. Six years was too damn long.
His hands found the hooks of your bra, and he made quick work of them, peeling the garment from your body and tossing it over his shoulder. He pulled back for just a second, just long enough to admire the sight of you, bare, breathless, your eyes fully dilated.
âDamn, Dollâ he whispered, voice almost reverent.Â
Then his mouth was on you, trailing down your neck hotly, over your collarbone, lower, until his lips wrapped around your nipple, sucking, groaning when your fingers tangled in his hair, when your body arched into his mouth.
âFeel so good,â he murmured against your skin, voice wrecked.
His hands roamed lower, curling around your thighs, gripping hard as he lifted you effortlessly, walking you backward until your spine hit the cool surface of the wall.
Bucky looked up at you then, eyes burning, voice nothing but gravel.
âHold on tight, Baby. I ainât letting you go this time.
Bucky pressed a kiss into you, his hard length grinding against your soaked panties. The heat of him, the sheer size of him, had you trembling.
"Need inside you, Doll⊠so fucking hard for you," he groaned, his voice rough with need.
You gasped as he rocked into you, your damp panties and his boxers doing little to separate the friction between you. Your hips rolled in response, dragging a throaty grunt from his lips.
"Fuck!"
Bucky hooked a finger into your panties, yanking them to the side. The first brush of his bare cock against your slick folds sent a shudder through you. It was heaven. The aching kind. The kind you felt.
"Bucky, please!"
You needed to feel him again after so long.
His thick cock slid through your folds, coating himself in your arousal, teasing your clit with every slow stroke. You felt everything, the ridges, the veins, the swollen head nudging at your entrance.
At the same time, his mouth latched onto your nipple, his stubble scraping deliciously against your skin. His calloused fingers kneaded the roundness of your ass, pulling unashamed whimpers from your throat.
"Mine," Bucky growled.
Your breath hitched. But just as you prepared for that first, deep thrust, he pulled back.
You gasped in protest.
"Gonna fuck you proper, though. In a bed."
You let out a breathless laugh as Bucky scooped you up effortlessly, carrying you to his bedroom. He laid you out, spreading your legs as he loomed over you, devouring the sight. His manicured nails dragged over your thighs in a slow, teasing stroke.
Your breath stuttered with anticipation.
"Be a good girl for me," he murmured, eyes dark with intent. "And grab my hair if you need to."
Confusion flickered in your eyes, until you felt your legs being thrown over his shoulders. Then, Bucky was between your thighs.
You scrambled up on your elbows, heat rushing to your face as he spread you open with two fingers, stroking the sensitive, slick folds hidden beneath. His gaze locked onto your glistening sex, mesmerized.
"So beautiful, Lark."
Your breath came in shallow gasps as he ran his fingers through your wetness, spreading it.
"So wet⊠dripping⊠coating my fingers, Baby."
The filthy words, the intensity of his stare, made fresh arousal seep from you. Your inner walls clenched around nothing, aching for more.
"Pinch those nipples for me," Bucky rasped,
Your lips parted in shock, but his stare was unwavering. With a shaky breath, you obeyed.
The added sensation sent pleasure rippling through you, making your back arch, your ass pressing into the mattress as Bucky pumped his fingers nice and slow. The other hand fisted around his cock, stroking in time with the movement inside you.
Your gaze dropped to watch him touch himself as he touched you. Fuck.
A gush of slick spilled from you. Bucky cursed under his breath, scissoring his fingers, stretching you, preparing you.
"So fucking tight, Doll. Need to get you ready."
Then, his head dipped lower. Your gasp filled the room. Bucky smirked.
"Why so shocked?" he taunted. "You act like you havenât had sex since I borrowed Johnnyâs carâ"
He stopped.
Your face must have given you away because his own softened instantly.
"Oh, shit."
His tone was different now, understanding.Â
"Itâs okay, Baby. I got you."
Determination flashed in his blue eyes as he leaned down again, brushing a featherlight kiss against your most sensitive place. It was intimate. Like he was kissing your mouth.
Then, he licked into you, slow and deliberate, and your world shattered. Lightning coursed through your veins as your thighs instinctively clamped around his head. Your fingers fisted in his curls, tugging mercilessly.
Bucky groaned in approval, his tongue swirling, sucking, worshiping. Every swipe, every firm drag, every deep flick had you writhing beneath him, riding his face, chasing oblivion.
When he pried your thighs apart and plunged two fingers back inside, curling them just right, you detonated.Â
Your orgasm ripped through you, your body seizing, your walls fluttering around his fingers as a flood of wetness spilled into his mouth.
"Bucky!"
He pulled back, lips glistening, eyes dark with satisfaction.
"Sâokay, Baby. Itâs natural."
Then he leaned down again. And drank from you like a man dying of thirst.
You whimpered, overwhelmed, your body trembling as he held you down, refusing to let you escape. The overstimulation was brutal, unbearable.
Too much, too good.
"Really have been such a good girl for meâŠ" he murmured against your sensitive skin.
Then, his voice dropped to something sinful.
"Gonna give you this cock you been waiting for."
When he finally kissed you, his lips slick with you, the last shred of restraint dissolved.
You moaned into his mouth as he lined himself up, dragging the thick, swollen head of his cock through your drenched folds. He parted your lips, teasing you with tiny, torturous strokes. Then, with a sharp slap, he tapped his cock against your clit, making you cry out.
"Shit, DollâŠ"Â
Buckyâs voice was strained, his jaw tight as he fought for control. You rolled your hips, desperate, pleading.
"Inside, please!"
"Youâre gonna feel⊠so⊠gooddddâŠ"
He bit it out through clenched teeth as he pushed forward slow, steady, and stretching you inch by inch. You choked on a moan as he filled you. He was so big. You had forgotten how thick, how deep, how perfect he felt inside you.
"Ohhhhhh, Bucky!"
"Right here, Baby."
His eyes locked onto you, greedily drinking in your bouncing breasts, your trembling stomach, the way your body took him. The sight alone nearly ended him. His head dropped back, his grip on you tightening as he bottomed out, grinding his hips into yours, making you wail in pleasure.
"You feel amazing⊠so fucking good. Never felt anything like this, I swear, Lark."
Your walls clenched around him, and Buckyâs face twisted, his control slipping.
"I need you to cum all over my dick."
You gasped as his hand found your clit, circling it with the same practiced precision that always ruined you. His other hand pinched your nipple, sending another bolt of pleasure straight to your core.
"Cum for me, Doll."
You had no choice. Your body seized, pleasure obliterating you as you came, gushing around his cock, wave after wave of ecstasy rolling through you.
Buckyâs grip turned bruising as he drove into you one last time, burying himself to the hilt. His breath caught.Â
"Mine!" he growled.Â
And his release filled you, thick and hot, as his body shuddered violently against yours.
And in that moment, tangled together, sweat-slicked and sated, you both knew
You were his again.
â--
Bucky collapsed beside you, chest heaving, staring blankly at the ceiling.
You did the same, but while he was basking in the afterglow, warmth spreading through his chest like hope, your stomach twisted into knots.
"Where you going, Lark?"
His voice was thick with exhaustion, but he still caught the way you shifted, the way your body tensed before you sat up.
"Bathroom," you murmured, already moving. "Need to clean up."
Something flickered in his eyes, something soft, something real. But the moment you slipped away, his hope dimmed just a little.
You disappeared into the harsh fluorescent glow of the bathroom, shutting the door behind you.
â--
Bucky sat at the edge of the bed, watching as you slipped your shoes back on. You moved quickly, deliberately. Like youâd planned your exit before you ever walked through his door.
"You donât have to run out like this," he said, voice rough.
You hesitated, just for a second, before fastening your coat.
"I have to get home."
Buckyâs fingers flexed against the sheets.
"Home."
He rolled the word over his tongue. He didnât like the way it tasted.
Your gaze lifted, and for a fleeting moment, something flickered there, regret, and sorrow buried so deep he almost missed it.
Bucky nodded, jaw tight. He had questions. Too many. But he knew you wouldnât answer them.
So he let you go.
But that didnât mean he was letting this go.
â-----
Bucky sat in the back of the Continental, silent as Steve drove.
He hadnât said a word since Steve muttered, âIâll take you to where she lives.â
Vegas never slept, but the streets were quiet this early. Bucky stared out the window, jaw clenched.
He shouldâve stopped you from leaving. Shouldâve asked the damn questions instead of letting you walk out. But you were good at slipping away. Youâd done it before.
Not this time.
Steve glanced at him in the rearview mirror.
"You sure about this?"
Buckyâs eyes stayed on the road ahead.
"Just drive."
Steve sighed but didnât argue. The car veered off the Strip, where the lights werenïżœïżœïżœt as bright, where the buildings werenât as tall, where the money wasnât as loud. It wasnât a bad neighborhood, but it sure as hell wasnât where Bucky expected you to be.
The car slowed.
A modest duplex came into view, its porch light flickering on.
Bucky barely registered anything beyond you were here. Until he saw the front door open.
You stepped out, wrapped in a housecoat, makeup gone, hair wrapped in a scarf. Then you walked to the neighboring unit. And knocked. The door cracked open.
And out ran a little boy.
Bucky sat up straighter, his breath hitching as the kid bolted toward you, dark messy hair bouncing, big blue eyes shining as he laughed, launching himself into your waiting arms.
You caught him effortlessly, hugging him close, whispering something into his ear.
Like youâd done it a thousand times before.
Because you had.
The realization hit like a bullet to the ribs.
You had a son.
Buckyâs world tilted.
Then, the boyâs voice, small and sleepy, carried through the quiet street.
"Mama, youâre home."
His breath left him in a rush.
"Yes, Jamie, Iâm home."
Steve tensed, hands gripping the wheel.
Buckyâs hands curled into fists.
"Buckâ"
"Drive," he rasped. The word barely made it past his lips.
Steve hesitated.
"Now."
The car pulled away, but Buckyâs eyes stayed locked on you.
Six years.
Six years, and you had kept this from him.
â---
The moment Jamie crashed into your arms, the world melted away.
"Mama, youâre home!"
You exhaled shakily, smoothing his hair, pressing a kiss to his forehead.
Miss Thea stood in the doorway, arms crossed over her housecoat, watching with quiet understanding. She didnât ask questions. Never had. Just gave you a slow nod before retreating inside.
Jamie yawned, burrowing into your shoulder, his little arms tightening around your neck.
"You smell funny," he mumbled sleepily.
You huffed a quiet laugh, shifting him in your arms.
"Yeah? What do I smell like?"
Jamie blinked up at you, barely awake.
"Like trouble," he sighed.
Your breath caught.
A chill danced down your spine, one you always felt when Bucky was near. Slowly, your eyes lifted, scanning the street.
Nothing. No car. No sign of him. But that didnât mean he hadnât been here.
You swallowed hard, clutching Jamie closer as you stepped inside, locking the door behind you. You couldnât shake the feeling.
Bucky knew.
And no matter how much you wanted to believe you could keep him awayâŠ.You knew better.
James Buchanan Barnes was coming for you.
For both of you.
#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes x singer!reader#bucky barnes imagine#mafia!bucky#HBBB#50's!Bucky Barns#Mafia! Bucky Barnes#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes au#bucky barnes birthday bingo#avengers assemble bingo#sam wilson#steve rogers#sebastian stan#4bbingo#happy birthday Bucky Barnes#50âs Bucky Barnes
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Honor Among Thieves
Pairing: Mob!Bucky x Reader
Summary: Marrying Brooklynâs most dangerous man was easy. Divorcing him proves to be a bit harderâparticularly when youâre pregnant with his child.
Warnings: 18+. Unprotected p-in-v. Oral (f!receiving). Breeding kink. Hurt/Comfort/We-Almost-Just-Died-Sex. Morning sickness. Manslaughter. Brief coerced kissing. Beefy, mob boss Bucky is a possessive expectant father who just wants to make sure he knocked you up properly
Descriptions of violence throughout
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4
âYou know exactly what youâre doing.â
Buckyâs words reverberated like a shotgunâs report, skimming across two dozen feet of marble, glass, and stainless steel before reaching your ears on the opposite end of the room. He was standing at the threshold of the kitchen, and your back was turned to him. Lucky thing, too, or else he wouldâve seen the smile threatening to tug at both ends of your lipsâeffectively blowing your cover.
âReally, I donât have the slightest idea, Barnes,â you told him, and it took everything in you not to laugh. Having just narrowly preserved your composure, you continued, âYou keep me locked in this prison all day and expect me not to find ways to entertain myself? Well, this is all it is.â
Like hell it was, you could already hear in Buckyâs head. Feeling him eye you up and down from the archway, take his first steps into the room, loosen his tie, most likely.
âPrison?â You registered a low scoff, and his voice was already so much closer than itâd been five seconds ago.
Your husband was striding as quickly as his smooth, dark, tailored suit would allow, and he was undressing as he walked. You could hear the clothes coming off but pretended not to notice. Instead staring more intently at the crab bisque simmering on the stove before you, you licked the spoon you were holding and hummed a little.
âYes,â you answered, simply, âPrison.â
Bucky was by your side in no time at all. Up close, he smelled like rosemary, oakmoss, and gunpowder.
âWell, this is news to me,â he said. He dragged out the middle syllables of his words longer than was necessary, likely to make his move sidling up closer to you. The last sound had scarcely died in his throat more than a second or two before you felt an arm loop around your back. A hand coming to rest on your hip, then his voice, again:
âSee, I never knew they built âprisonsâ up in first-class penthouse apartments in Brooklyn. Must be pretty nice.â
Bucky stepped behind you, and you were half-certain the black suit jacket heâd come home wearing was fully removed. Again, you pretended not to see, or care.
âItâs a metaphor, James.â But your voice wavered.
âA metaphor?â Buckyâs head sank into the soft groove between your neck and your shoulder, and he kissed it.
âYes.â
Your mouth made a sound more akin to a breath than a real, enunciated word, and you knew Bucky felt it too. He sensed this headstrong, no-bullshit façade of yours was sure to come crumbling apart any second, and each new brush of his hands and lips would be making it happen. Knowing this, he wasnât in a rush to get the rest of his clothes off. He did, however, start to toy with yours.
âTell me more. Am I really holding you hostage, doll?â
You took a ladle and started to stir, trying to stay cool. Meanwhile, your husband tugged gently on your dress.
âHostage, housewife, same thing,â you muttered, low.
For once, it was Buckyâs turn to break character, as he laughed. It was short-lived and sweet, and he pressed another kiss to the skin of your neck, as if in apology.
âRight, right. I forgot. You were forced to marry me.â
âRight,â you shook your head, just slightly emboldened by the way youâd made him crack, if only for a moment, âIâm forced to marry you, move into this horrific little shanty in Brooklynââgesturing to the multi-million dollar apartment surrounding you bothââand then you leave me here, all by myself, with nothing to do while you go play Godfather with your mobster friends. Itâs not fair.â
By the tail end of that last sentence, you and Bucky both were already grinning a little, coming to terms with just how ridiculous it sounded when you phrased it like that. Still, your husband seemed game to keep the bit going.
âNow thatâs just not true,â he said, tone all faux offense.
You felt the soft snap of a ribbon coming undone, and in a second realized it was the satin bow holding the back of your dress together. The fabric loosened, and Buckyâs hands slid down your sides, over your frontâof course.
âI didnât leave you âby yourselfâ at all, doll,â he said, and suddenly, his palms were fanning out, over something, âGave you this baby to keep you company, didnât I?â
The âsomethingâ he was touching now was your belly. All soft and smooth and protruding out in a perfect little globe beneath your dress, no bigger than when heâd left for work that morning. Bucky treated the bump like it was a novelty all the sameâlike he was seeing it for the first time and couldnât believe he was actually the one responsible for making it get like that. It had gotten to be a hobby of his, nearly, just how much he loved watching it grow. He had his fingers splayed out across your tummy virtually every chance he could get, and that didnât stop whether you were out in public or sharing a moment in the comfort of home; he couldnât get enough.
Which was why Bucky was right when heâd said you knew exactly what you were doing when he came home that day. You knew just the kind of effect that wearing a tight, white dress while cooking dinner would have on him, and you hoped it would rile him up just like this: with his hands roaming over every inch of your body, making soft, sweet circles along the swell of your belly, and kissing your neck again and again. Biting some, too. Getting so worked up he was all but gnawing at the skin as he drank in your scent and got lost to pure instinct.
If it wasnât clear that Bucky had had a breeding kink before, you saw it written plain as day across his face every morning and night since heâd first learned you were pregnant. Like all the life force within him was just a byproduct of the knowledge that you were hisâand this baby, growing bigger each day, was a mix of you both.
You hated to say it, but fatherhood suited your assassin-trained, mob-heading, bloodlusting husband better than anyone could have predicted in a million years or more.
Presently, Bucky flipped you around and sank to his knees. He slid you over to the counterspace area, away from the stove, and made sure to flip each knob to âoffâ to make sure there wasnât a chance youâd get burned. You cast one last look at the crab bisque and knew at once your hard work would have to be put on the back burner for now, because Bucky wasnât hungry for that.
Still, you kicked a foot in soft, muted protest when you felt him slide his hands up your legs, under your dress, and start to reach for your panties. You let out a breath.
âI spent two hours perfecting the seasoning on that, Barnes,â you chided him, gently and without much admonition in your voice as you pointed to the soup, âYou say you want a good little housewife but wonât even leave me un-fucked long enough to try any food I make!â
âAnd Iâm very sorry about that, Mrs. Barnes,â Bucky replied, head disappearing beneath your skirt so he could take your underwear off with his teeth instead.
But, much like your reproach, your husbandâs strained apology held less than half of its professed sincerity. Your blue cotton panties were discarded in a second, your hips pushed back against the cool white marble behind it, and Bucky, almost too cheekily, brought his head back up from underneath your dress just to steal a quick look at your belly, then up at you. He was smiling.
âAnything you make tastes amazing, honey. Daddy just needs to eat a little something beforehand, that okay?â
He already knew what youâd say. The sweet, shit-eating grin hovering over your lower half knew all that and more. Bucky just loved to tease, taking the hem of your dress between his index and thumb, and rubbing all the more tenderly, murmuring again, âThat alright with you, pretty girl?â and âMy wife likes getting tonguefucked in the kitchen, doesnât she?â while his breaths spread over you.
You nodded that you did. Momentarily forgetting the three-course meal youâd had planned for him since early that morning, you let your knees fall limply apart from one another, and Buckyâs broad form filled the space in between. The fabric of your dress was snug, especially so over your belly. Your husband pushed the material up your hips and let it rest just high enough to expose your warmth to him. Angling your hips back the slightest bit, trailing his fingers up your thighs and inside them, gently, Bucky let out a low groan against your body, and you could feel the vibrations of it travel up your spine.
âI really am mean for keeping you here all day, arenât I?â he teased, sliding the tips of his fingers between your glistening folds and watching you jolt in response.
âSoâ so mean. Bucky, please.â
Your voice was far more hoarse than circumstances would seem to beget; your husband had just eaten you out that morning. Nevertheless, your hand was trembling as it reached for his head. Your pull was taut and dire. While your fingers threaded in through his hair and your body opened itself more and more for him, you could feel that kind smile, even if you couldnât see it. Frankly, the swelling of eight-and-a-half months made it difficult to see much of anything below the waist, but Bucky made sure to let you know he was there. By holding your hand, skimming his lips against your skin, starting, just then, to sink his fingers in toward the heat of your body, and softly pulling his face away so he could look up at you.
âBaby?â he breathed.
Your eyes locked with his as he slid two fingers inside you. The stretch alone was enough to put your brain on the fritz, but, fighting the first shockwaves of pleasure:
âY-Yeah?â
He withdrew. Pressed them back in and let out a grunt.
âI need you to do something for me.â
You couldnât fathom what that might be, but you nodded anyway. âAnythingâ was what you managed to choke out.
âAnd you might not like it, doll.â
Your eyes widened some.
âOâ O-Okay, what?â
Buckyâs fingers curled inside you, and a short, sharp streak of dizzying pleasure pulsed through your body. Your knees felt weak, and your mind even worse, but with what little resolve you had left, you were able to keep your eyes entirely open and fastened to his. A look that struck you as almost bittersweet crossed your husbandâs features, and you saw his gaze soften again.
âI need you to wake up,â he said, calmly.
âWhat?â
Your toes curled tight underneath you, and the warmth between your legs leapt up to over a thousand degrees.
âMelaya, I need you to wake up.â
At the same time, your blood ran cold in your veins. Surely, you couldnât be hearing him right if the voice he used was so gruff and lowâand laden with a Russian lilt.
âBucky? Whatâ What do you mean?â
But you knew. Or suspected something of it anyway.
Now the sound from your own throat was hardly one that you recognized as yours, so shrill and high and strangeâwhat could he mean by that? Why was he watching you in that way? Your husband wasnât smiling so brightly anymore, and the once-gratifying conflagration between your legs had grown to an almost scorching degree, no longer nice, generous, or pleasurable in the slightest.
âWe need you to wake up now, honey. Right now.â
His tone, too, was distorted. Grating.
âBucky, I-I donât understââ
âWAKE UP!â
âWAKE UP!â
Natasha shook you hard, and it hurt.
She didnât mean for it to. She just needed you up and out of bed, and youâd been asleep for almost fourteen hours.
You started at the fifth or sixth shake, nearly punching yourself in the face when you tried yanking a set of covers up and over your head and discovered, shortly, that there was none. You were splayed out on a bed in an as-yet unfamiliar homeâSteveâs new placeâand, while you slept, youâd kicked all of the blankets youâd been given the night before off your body and onto the floor.
Your eyes were wide as saucers as they darted to Natâs.
There was no need to say what had happenedâshe knew these dreams were getting worse by the day.
Itâd been a week since you fled your Brooklyn apartment in an all-out terror. A week since a senseless, short-sighted idea on your part had led to the discovery that your husband was once part of a HYDRA sleeper cell whose activation phrase turned him into an agent of total destruction at will. A week since youâd seen a half dozen bodies litter your living room floor, more still being bludgeoned by the so-called âWinter Soldier,â as Bucky had formerly been known. A week since youâd sobbed in Natashaâs arms and begged her not to let you go back. A week since youâd been obliged to hide out in Steve Rogersâ new bachelor pad upstate, because, frankly, there was nowhere else you could safely live until this whole ordeal with Bucky was settledâif it ever would be.
A full week since youâd learned you were pregnant, too.
As far as you knew, your husband was wholly unaware of this fact, and of Steveâs most recent real estate purchase up in Buffalo, and youâd been existing in a semi-serene and largely dissociated state for the past seven days.
Your gaze adjusted to the light, and you blinked up at Nat, feeling damp in just about every place on your body. You looked down and found yourself drenched in sweat.
âHydrate. Please.â
It wasnât so much a request as it was a standing order: Nat holding out a glass of water and instructing you to drink. Though your first instinct was to make a face and shake your headâyouâd found that any new fluids in your body this early in the morning would only get thrown back up when you made your first frantic trip to the toiletâyou accepted it anyway. You drank three big gulps to appease the woman standing next to the bed, then wiped your mouth with the back of your hand and smiled
âIâm gonna go puke now,â you said.
âAim for inside the toilet bowl if you can,â Steve called out from the doorway. By the look on his face, youâd been doing a pretty shit job of aiming vomit lately.
âMy bad, Rogers.â
You had a hand on your stomach, slowly easing back up into a seated position, when you heard something being flung across the room, followed by a âHEY!â and a crash.
âYour aim sucks, too, Romanoff,â Steve griped, loudly, âAnd I was kidding. She can puke wherever she wants.â
By the door, a hefty hardcover book lay open on the floor. Apparently Natâs options for projectiles had been limited.
âAll good, Rogers,â you offered anyway. Fighting a smirk.
You were starting to stand, and your head felt as if youâd just taken your first steps off a rocking boat. Your other hand jumped to your mouth, and you muttered, âFuckâ before brushing past Nat and her outstretched arms.
She held your hair while Steve retrieved the glass of water, as well as a towel. The unsightly first trimester ritual proceeded as it had for all of the last week, with Nat rubbing circles in your back and Steve making well-meaning but completely useless live commentary like, âBabies are a real pain in the ass, arenât they?â At the conclusion of each new stupid remark, Natasha would shoot a dirty look his way, but you never let her shoo him away. Through no conscious choice of your own, Steve had become something of a comfort blanket over the course of the past chaotic days. At the very least, you two were no longer at each otherâs throats flinging accusations and exorbitantly-priced tumblers in the otherâs direction, which was a marked improvement from where you were the day after you and Buckyâs wedding.
At length, you lifted your head from the toilet, and he daubed at your cheek with the towelâmostly just trying to wipe off spit and your own queasy-looking expression. He succeeded in clearing away just the former, but you forced a smile all the same, then shared it with Natasha.
Nat couldnât smile back. In fact, the grimace on her face only etched even deeper, and her forehead creased.
âThis is a horrible time to be asking you this, I knowââ
âNat, please.â Steve groaned.
Nat, what? There wasnât a lot more that could catch you off guard after all the shit youâd come to see that week. Still, Natâs breaths were both measured and slow, and you could see she was chewing on the inside of her cheek like she wasnât quite sure how best to phrase her words. This, coming from one of the most astute legal minds this side of the Hudson River, gave you pause.
âAsk anything. Iâm pretty numb, if you havenât noticed.â You rapped on the side of your head for comedic effect, but neither Natasha nor Steve laughed or cracked a grin.
âHow do you feel about filing for divorce tomorrow?â
At the sound of Natâs words, you felt the bile jump back up your throat. You knew there wasnât enough food or fluid to make much of anything now, but all the same, you craned your neck back over the toilet and retched. When nothing came out, as expected, you turned back.
âWhat?â
Natasha looked a little ill herself, but still, she continued.
âHow do you feel about justâŠfast-tracking a divorce from him and taking off new? Weâll talk assets later.â
Assets? Fast-track? Divorce? What the fuck?
âWhat the fuck, Nat?â you repeated as much out loud.
It normally wasnât your thing to be so blunt with her, but the inquiry certainly seemed to invite some extra candor. You swiped at your mouth for any excess spit that mightâve trickled out, crudely, and in a second, Steve was handing you the towel. Then helping you to your feet, holding your arm and lower back in a grip you could feel was secure. You were unsteady on your legs, so he and Natasha guided you over to the sink, where you could regain your bearings and freshen up a bit. Sneaking a look at your reflection in the mirror was a bad idea; your face was sallow, and the rest of your body had every appearance of being horribly weak, for lack of a better word. You caught a glimpse of a gash sitting just above your left temple and immediately looked away. Stupidly, you hoped Steve and Nat hadnât seen it.
âHe did that to you,â Nat said without missing a beat.
You winced, and you washed your hands, not looking up.
âI thought you said it wasnât him. Soldat, you told me.â And for a second, your eyes flickered to Steve, whose expression was a touch more sympathetic, if not visibly discomfited now. Like he didnât want to speak for once.
He did, anyway: âDoesnât matter if it was Winter or him, really. Point is he hurt you while trying to protect yââ
âAnd yet, you asked me to forgive him just last week for killing my dad in the same type of rage,â you replied, and instantly regretted the accusatory tone youâd taken on.
Your anger was misdirected at Steve. It wasnât his fault for sharing the truth about your husbandâsâhis best friendâsâpast when youâd asked him. These were queries youâd made, helping to form justifications for your own decision to stay after what had happened in Madripoor. Obviously, Steve would be biased to help support his friend in a time of need. But now things were different; Bucky had never been activated as soldat and ended up hurting someone heâd loved before. Steve was free to change his mind after seeing that happen and urge you to leave, or at least reconsider, your marriage to Bucky.
The second look you gave him attempted to convey as much, a bit more apologetic as he and Natasha led the way out of the bathroom. Steve smiled and held your arm again, though you probably didnât need it. You walked downstairs to the kitchen together. Over by the toaster, Sam was inspecting a charred bagel with a scowl
âRogers, you really need to ditch this shit,â he said, gesturing to the rusted metal contraption that appeared to be from 1918, and had just burnt two bagels to a crisp.
âIt was a gift from a friend, piss off,â Steve replied, grinning a little. Reaching for the blackened bread roll and even going so far as to take a bite, crunching loudly.
âDid your friend happen to fight in World War II?â Nat asked. She lent one look to the archaic machine but said nothing further, opting instead to take a seat at the kitchen table, where a sea of papers was strewn about.
Then, to you, âCome. Sit.â
Somewhere in your tentative stroll from where you stood to where she sat, and in the middle of the menâs toaster bickering, Sam called out that heâd have bacon and eggs ready in a second. Steve offered up his singed sesame bagel in the interim, and you told him no thanks. With a still slightly throbbing skull and a nauseous gait, you took the chair next to Natâs and looked down at her papers.
Honestly, you thought your present condition might warrant some leeway when it came to holding off on the heavy-hitting topics first thing, but, to your surprise, Natasha slid a crisp white packet over almost instantly.
âNat, what the fuck?â you groaned for the second time.
âRead it. Give it a second to digest, then we canââ
âNo!â you cut in, pushing the packet back to her with a little more force than youâd meant, âI-I canât. Not now.â
On the very first page, in bold and capitalized typeface, there was printed a brief string of words youâd never wantedâor thought you would ever needâto see:
âVERIFIED COMPLAINT: ACTION FOR DIVORCEâ
âItâs just the petition. No harm in taking a look,â Nat said.
You could hear a faintly gentler tone in her voice, even as you shook your head and looked away from the papers.
âI donât want to. I canât do this right now.â You kept shaking your head for a couple seconds after, turning your gaze instead to the bay window of Steveâs kitchen.
A nice, sprawling yard stretched as far as you could see. In the distance, a fuzzy white horizon was punctuated the slightest bit by the outline of a wood fence, but apart from that, the land was empty. The lot was secluded. Happy and effervescent in a nearly cloudless sky, the midmorning sun cast its rays without so much as the threat of a stormâs hinderance. You fixed your eyes on the clear expanse above and silently wished it would rain.
Before more than a minute or two had passed like that, Sam was approaching the table with two platters. Steve balanced four more by himself, watching the sway of one plate of scrambled eggs in his arms with a wary look before setting each one of the dishes on the table.
âBon appĂ©tit,â Steve said, butchering his French just about as badly as Sam had the bagels. You and Nat thanked them both anyway and started clearing off the table, pushing papers away in favor of steaming plates. Sam and Steve sat down, and all of you began to eat.
While you dutifully piled on each scoop of eggs, bacon, sausage links, biscuits, gravy, and gritsâfar more than you knew you could feasibly consumeâyou wished again for a rainstorm, and maybe a quiet breakfast. One that wasnât marred by talks of legal separation and lengthy battles in court, if you could help it at all. To this end, and perhaps against your bodyâs best interest, you shoveled two supersized spoonfuls of egg in your mouth, so that if Nat tried reviving those subjects again, you could put off the conversation by simply continuing to chew. You felt your stomach turn inside you but, stubbornly, ate more.
You had just swallowed it all, about to make way for a warm, flaky buttermilk biscuit, when a sound cut in, and your belly flipped again. Your teeth had barely sunk into the bread a second when Nat set her own food aside, then used two fingers to push something toward you.
âJust skim it. Let me explain what the process can be,â she said, tapping her index on the first line and meeting your eyes as if to plead. She had to have known sheâd be met with resistanceâfrom you, of course, but also Steve. She raised a defensive hand to him before he even cut in:
âCome the fuck on, Nat. Will you give her a break?â
âIâm saying this for her sake! Iâm doing it for her.â
âAnd throwing divorce papers in her face over breakfast is really the best way of going about it? Is that for her?â
Sam swallowed whatever heâd been chewing on, glanced down at the top paper, and seemed to brace himself.
âGuys, is now really the right timeââ he started.
âThatâs what Iâm saying!â Steve barked over him.
Natasha ignored the plainly disdainful look from the latter, lifted her hand off the paperwork and instead trained her gaze solely on you. Just like she had in Zurich. Focusing intently on your face, ignoring whatever Steve or Sam were saying in the moment, she turned to you and found your expression was stale. Unmoving. Frankly, half of what was running through your mind right then was how badly you wanted to puke again. As if the eggs had turned rotten in your gut the second they reached their destination in your GI tract, you felt a heavy, oppressive fog of nausea taking shape between your ears, and you just wanted everyone to stop talking.
Sam and Steve continued on without a hitch, agreeing vaguely but also appearing to bicker over other things, like when was the most appropriate time to have this conversation. Natasha was leaning in, reaching for your hand this time, and you knew she meant well. You would bet any large sum of money there wasnât a malicious bone in her body, and she was doing this for your benefit. All the same, you were grateful when the front door swung back on its hinges, and a new person walked in. Nat, Sam, and Steve all suspended their conversations.
âHey, whââ the blissfully unaware, semi-stranger began.
âSharon!â Steve cried, âWould you tell Romanoff sheâs being a goddamn pest with no sense of boundaries?â
Sharon halted at the threshold of the house, skating a look between Nat and Steve at first, then Steve and Sam, then just at you. The look didnât linger for long, and before you knew it, she was setting down a fistful of grocery bags and twisting her mouth into a frown.
âWill you shut up, Steve?â was her only response.
Sam rose from his chair and pointed as if to say, âYeah, thatâ before joining her in the foyer to help carry in the Wegmans bags. Natasha leaned back in her chair with a vaguely pleased look, and Steve just rolled his eyes. He slapped his palm overtop the stack of divorce papers still laying before you and, seemingly undeterred, continued,
âDo you think itâs fair for her to force divorce papers on this poor soulââ pointing to you, the poor soul, apparently, ââwhen itâs been a week since she left?â
Sharon started handing off the frozen stuff first, sliding a box of Stoufferâs across the counter to Sam, who then deposited it in the freezer. These exchanges took place in relatively quick succession, with Sharon only chancing a look toward the kitchen table once or twice as they did.
âI think she should do whatever the hell she wants,â she said, âAnd I think their divorce is none of our business.â
Fair enough take. One that you could respect, at the very least, even if you werenât certain she particularly cared for you at all. You reckoned she had no reason to, and on the whole, appeared to be a pretty reserved person.
You wanted to add a word in her defense, reiterate to Steve that he didnât have to go to bat for you, the poor, defenseless soul, right now. Instead of being able to speak, though, you felt an upsurge of something heavy in your throat. You clamped a hand to your mouth again, cheeks flushing with the heady sensation and also out of embarrassment, then pushed your chair back and stood.
âIâ gottaââ you stammered, just audible to the table, through the wall your fingers had made over your lips.
You sprinted up the stairs without another word.
The first trimester ritual repeated, and ten minutes later, you re-emerged from the bathroom feeling two big spoonfuls of scrambled eggs lighter and still none the happier, healthier, or wiser. You took a peek in the full-length mirror at the other end of the room and discerned from a distance of ten feet that you looked like dogshit.
You flopped down on the bed face-first, heedless of the pool of sweat that still encompassed roughly half of it, and let out a weak, muffled breath into the sheets. Someone had been gracious enough to replace all the blankets and pillows youâd kicked off last night. When you heard a knock on the door, it sounded a lot like Natâs.
You rolled to the side, eyes screwed shut in frustration.
âIf youâve come to tell me my marriage is a fucking dumpsterfire, I agree completely, Natasha. Iâm dumb.â
A little huff of a half-laugh sounded from the doorway. You opened your eyes and saw Sharon standing there.
Up close, she looked a little paler than youâd remembered seeing her last in Switzerland. Soft beads of perspiration dotted her neckline from what had likely been a hot and arduous journey walking up the driveway with all the food, and presently, she seemed tired. She wore a simple gingham blouse that had her eyes shining with vibrance, though, and both hands, you noticed, were fullâshe had a mug in one and a spoon in the other. She smiled kindly.
âThe mob tends to have that effect,â she said, strolling in. Setting the mug on the nightstand and easing the spoon into it, stirring, âDonât be too hard on yourself.â
You had no idea what all she knew about your marriage. You werenât so sure you could extricate yourself from all the blame of having the thing go up in flames in four short weeks. Nevertheless, you smiled back and offered up something good-humored in return, like, well, Iâm not exactly winning wife of the fucking year anytime soon.
Again, Sharon chuckled. It was small. She leaned back against the nearest armchair and, pointing to the cup sheâd left to rest on the nightstand, said in a soft voice,
âGive that a minute. Itâs hot.â
You glanced over and saw a little string that you guessed was attached to a teabag sitting at the bottom of the mug. The drink smelled like chamomile, maybe. You sat up, readjusted your pyjama top, then slid your socked feet underneath you so you could scoot closer to the edge of the bed. On a deeper inhale, you decided the tea was definitely chamomile. And too hot, as Sharon said.
âThank you,â you told her.
âItâs not poisoned, I promise,â she replied. Letting out that funny little chuckle of hersâone too low to be considered a full laugh, but very closeâand then, seeming to realize what she said mightâve sounded off, âLikeâ I heard what happened with Schröder. Him trying to drug you after the wedding and allâŠthat. Iâ Iâm sorry.â
Bad time to be making jokes, she appeared to chastise herself, but you just nodded along with the faintest grin.
âItâs OK. Iâd pay money to be knocked the fuck out now.â
You grinned bigger, and she smiled too.
âIt should make you sleepier, if you wanted to nap.â
You replied that you would, in fact, love to be unconscious right now if it meant not having to put up with all this bullshit morning sickness, and you slowly reached for the mug. Sharon stood up, and while you took your first sips, she fluffed the pillows behind you.
She was right. The tea felt like a hug. You settled under the covers and brought the cup to your lips once more, taking two big draughts before setting the drink aside. Yeah, that shitâll put you right out, no drugs needed. You sank even further under the sheets and watched Sharon hover between the bed and the doorway, looking around as if trying to find something to doâsome way to make herself feel more useful, if you had to guess from the pensive look in her eyes. Finally, she settled closer to the door and gave you one, fairly sanguine look. The warmth of your drink had already begun to nestle inside your weary bones, and your eyelids felt heavier. Still, you tried to return the sunny look before getting fully settled.
âThanks again, Sharon. I appreciate it.â
âYeah, of course.â
She started to leave. In fact, sheâd already made it three-fourths out of the room when something stopped her in her tracks. She turned back to you, and you looked up.
âThisâŠprobably doesnât mean a whole lot coming from me, butâwhatever you decide to do with BuckyâŠis okay. Weâll support you, whether you choose to raise this baby with him or doâŠwhatever it is you want to do. Donât let Nat or Steve or Sam or anybody tell you differently. Itâs your choice, yâknow, whether you wanna stay marriedâŠâ
Sharon trailed off, and somewhere inside, you could tell she meant to finish with words like, ââŠeven if you didnât get to make the choice to get married in the first place.â You appreciated it. You beamed with just your head poking out from over the covers and thanked her again.
And, before she left, for the second time, she stopped. She walked over to the nightstand and bent slightly at the waist, just enough to set something small down. You turned to the side and saw a vialâa minuscule tubeâon the surface. Your eyes widened, realizing what it was.
âSam picked it up in Madripoor. He said Steve had given this to youâŠto, uh, give to Schröder, and I thought you should have it back,â she said, pausing, âJust in case.â
You eyed the little vial of poison on the nightstand and nodded, still not completely understanding. Your head throbbed, your stomach was still turning, churning. Your brain was about ten blinks away from logging off entirely and drifting to sleep. All you could do, then, was repeat what Sharon had said as you exchanged one final look.
âJust in case.â
Your eyes closed, and you fell asleep very soon after.
You couldnât have been out for more than an hour; you were sure of it. However, the next time you glanced over at the clock on the bedside table, you saw it read 11:04.
P.M.
Shit.
SHIT.
That chamomille tea was no fucking joke.
Just as your thoughts drifted back to Sharon, the conversation youâd shared, the drink sheâd given you, the poison sheâd left behind for you to keep, you heard her voice all over againâand now, not just in your own head.
Presently, she was standing over your bed again, though the room was much darker this time around. She pressed a finger to her lips, hey, please, please, be quiet, alright? At first you wanted to make a sharp and strangled sound. A cry for help? You werenât sure. Didnât know. Couldnât see very much of the woman at all, except for the outline of her face from the moonlight streaming in through the window. She stared and âshhâedâ some more.
And you were contemplating yelling out a loud obscenity in response to it when next she cut in, markedly gentler:
âKeep it quick. Nat and the guys will be back in thirty.â
You blinked hard into the darkness and waited for your vision, or else your still-missing voice, to return. It didnât. You just stared back, eyelids going up and down and up and down like a goddamn idiot gone sluggish off one too many Quaaludes, and it was several seconds more before she gestured behind her, into the shadows.
You tensed under the covers, chock-full of terror. You squinted, and shrank, and mightâve nearly pissed yourself were it not for the intervening force of a face.
A familiar face.
Buckyâs face.
You leapt up from the bed, displacing each one of Sharonâs cool and careful warnings from your mind all at once. You didnât mean to, and as soon as sheâd shushed you again, you shut your mouth. Fell still. Sharon slipped out of the room, reminding you both, again, that you had to be quiet, and you had to be quick. Then it was just you and Bucky. Silence and slightly less than five feet of space between you two. Then, shortly, no space to spare at all, as you ran to meet each for a hug a second later.
Your head struck his chest, and it was hard. That, alongside the pythonâs squeeze he wrapped around your body, hugging you to him in the tightest embrace imaginable, had your mind reeling, skull pulsing just a bit. You pulled back and stood smiling up at Bucky, whose eyes were wide, drinking the sight of you in.
âAre you hurt?â were his first words.
You shook your head that you werenât, still unable to talk.
âWhy are youâ Whoâ who brought youâ I didnâtââ
It seemed Bucky was equally hard-pressed to form a sentence himself, while his eyes were roaming wildly, all over you. Looking for bumps or bruises or cuts, whatever the wound might have been. He stumbled to the lamp and flicked it on. You tilted your head left, reflexively.
âIâm fine, Bucky,â you said. Sudden and swift, âIâm good.â
But you didnât move your head too far to the right, either, for fear he might see the cut above your templeâthe one soldat had caused when heâd pushed you to the floor, trying to protect you from a threat he couldnât see.
As it was, your husband seemed to be too much in shock to see anything else apart from what stood immediately in front of him. He hugged you again. He kissed the crown of your head. He constricted your body so tight in his arms you felt a pressure start to build behind your eyes, and suddenly you werenât so much pulling away as you were wrenching your body from him. When you met Buckyâs gaze again, the sweet blue irises were glossy.
âNat wouldnât say where you were, just that you were safe and needed to beâŠbe alone for a while, but Iââ He stopped, and it was as if he couldnât even finish with the words, because his breath was stuck in his throat and his eyes were stinging too much. He looked down, briefly.
You wanted to reach for his hand but hesitated. He took yours a second later, holding extra tight as he continued:
âI thought Iâdâ thought you mightâveâŠleft. I donât know. I hadnât been able to sleep, and then sheâ Sharon, she called me tonight, said you were here, soâ soââ
You felt a pang of guilt holding his gaze, seeing how all the hurt that had come to accumulate behind those eyes over the last week went spilling, at length, into emotions he was either too overcome or sleep-deprived to express. The weight of this suffocated him, made him extra quick to speak his mind but slow to make sense of just about anything that was coming out of his mouth. He stopped, sucked in a breath, then pinched your hand in his, and you didnât know what to do. You had no idea what to say.
âI was scared, Bucky.â
It sounded pathetic coming out of your mouth. Your husband nodded as though youâd just said the most profound thing in the world. His knuckles went white from just how hard he was gripping your hand, his head bobbed along in agreement, and for a moment, you winced to think that he might hug you again. Instead, the fingers tangled between yours just made a tighter knot.
âI know. Iâm sorry. Iâm sorry,â he said.
âYou scared me,â you added, voice wavering.
Your left hand was going numb. You didnât want to give him pauseâpossibly hurt his feelingsâby freeing your touch from his, but that grip was brutal. Deathly rigid and unforgiving. Thoughts of Brooklyn and Madripoor came flooding back; Bucky was so much stronger than he realized. His tone, in contrast, was dulcet and soft.
âI didnât know Iâd get like that. I shouldâve told you, doll.â
âI shouldnât have tried the activation in the first place.â
You shouldnât have tried digging into Buckyâs past all. When all there seemed to be at every turn was a brand new way for him to hurt you, or the people you loved, maybe there came a time when you had to stop asking questions altogether. Maybe that was what his mother and all the women whoâd gone before her had known to do, what you had been too stupid to see all along. There was no knowing these men at all, only taking them as they were and learning to cope with what they became.
Bucky shook his head.
âNo, doll, itâs not on you,â he murmured low. Still forceful
Thankfully, he released your hand to cup your cheeks, and he kissed your forehead. You felt your pulse in your palm, throbbing from where heâd held it. When he let go the second time, his expression was considerably softer.
âListen, Iâll take you home, we can talk things over. As long as I know youâre safe, it doesnât have toâ toââ
Hey. He was already halfway toward the door before he realized you werenât following him. He turned and gestured forward. He beckoned you, brows drawing in.
âBaby? Câmon.â
You didnât budge.
Your feet were rooted in place, as though cemented to the floor. No matter how much you wanted to appease him, go along with whatever he asked, you couldnât. You shook your head, and Bucky tilted his own, confused.
âBaby?â
âIâm leaving, Bucky.â
You couldnât hear your own words slipping out between your teeth, only the blood rushing through your ears. Bucky stopped and turned to face you completely.
âWhat?â
âIâm leaving.â
âWhatâ what do you mean, âyouâre leavingâ?â
âI want a divorce.â
That part you did hear yourself. You wished you hadnât.
You wished you hadnât seen the light break off from Buckyâs eyes, expression going limp the instant your words registered with him. You nearly wished you hadnât said them at all, seeing just how far his face fell and how hurt he looked by themâbut quietly, from somewhere more rational-headed inside yourself, there was a voice reminding the rest of you that it needed to be done. You couldnât keep pretending like this wasnât what had had to come next. What youâd been skirting with Nat all day and hadnât been able to bring yourself to admit before now.
Your husband still didnât seem to be computing it fully. He walked closer to you, and his gait was unsteady.
âDivorce?â
Your vision was bleary; you hadnât even realized tears had begun to brim at your waterline as you watched him.
âItâs what we need, Bucky,â you could barely get it out.
âI donât,â he shot back, not missing a beat, âI donât.â
âItâs what I need.â
âYou donât mean that.â
His voice was hoarse, face shifting from lax incredulity to one of a winceâscrewed up in a way that said he felt ill. You shook your head but couldnât look away from him.
âYou donât mean that,â he repeated.
âItâs what I want,â you pressed on, just as sick yourself.
âYou said what you wanted was me.â Again, Buckyâs voice splintered, and you could feel the pain in it.
âYou said you wouldnât hurt me, Bucky.â
Gritting your teeth, unsure where else to fix your stare on his face but those eyesâwhile your own betrayed their feelings too easily, fraught with wet, rolling tearsâyou shouldnât have been surprised when his went wider.
âWhat are you talking about?â
The question was short, sharp, and biting, spoken with such haste as might be mistaken for anger, but the eyes softened his look at once. The anguish painting them now as he stared back at you were a proof, beyond a doubt, that it was betrayal, not rage, which steered him. He turned, and it was as if he couldnât see a thing but you; his elbow clipped the lamp and knocked it over, but still, he just stared. In turn, the ceramic appliance rolled onto its side, toppled the mug and the vial beside it, and all three went crashing to the floor. Bucky didnât blink.
âWhââ he started again, but you didnât hear the rest.
You remembered Sharon. Heard a flash of her last admonition in your headâbe quiet, be quickâand without thinking, you fell to your knees. You tried retrieving what pieces of chipped lamp and shattered mug you could, quickly. You spotted the small vial on the floor and shoved it in a pocket. Your hands swept over the broken pieces without any real idea of what you were doingâall except needing to clean Buckyâs messâand then swiftly, stupidly, you tried picking it up by yourself.
Of course, a shard cut you. The little slit that was left in its wake could have been no wider than a fraction of an inch, but still, it bled. You looked down at the cut, just then starting to sprout red from left to right along the side of your palm, when a new sight crossed your vision. It was fast, too. All but thoughtless in the way it broke in, gripping your hand in his, and yanking you to your feet. Bucky hadnât seen that youâd cut yourself, it seemed, and, out of instinct, had grabbed your hand to help you up. As before, his grasp was like a vice, and his thumb pressed right inside the lacerated flesh, sending a whole new maelstrom of pain shooting up your wrist and arm. Now, as then, he was heedless of his strength and his sheer, brute force, that he didnât even see the effect of his grip. He just held on, held you, tighter, tighter, andâ
âSTOP!â you shrieked.
You shoved him off. Pried his touch off your palm and gripped your forearm in your other hand and pored over the sight, seeing the gash almost doubled in size from just where Buckyâs finger had sunk into the fresh wound. You let out a sharp, muffled cry through lips that tried to stay closedâremembering Sharon again. You shook your head, clenched your jaw, and tore off the other direction.
And when your husband reached out, eyes wide with their own shock and apologies, âBaby, fuck, Iâm so sorrââ you threw him off again. With your non-bleeding palm, you thrust your hand against his chest and pushed hard:
âDonât touch me!â
When he reached for you again, as if by force of habit, you held up a defensive arm and sobbed out, âStop!â
âDonât touch me, donâtâdonâtâdonât fucking touch me.â
You screamed it. You didnât mean to. Thinking only vaguely of the need to be quiet, and almost entirely on the stabbing pain in your hand, the imprint of Buckyâs touch on your body, and the blood trickling down your forearm, you darted into the bathroom and threw the door closed behind you. You locked it. You meant to.
Twenty minutes might as well have been twenty years in Bucky Barnesâ mind. In a moment like this, following yet another supreme fuck up on his part, he felt powerless. He had had to fight the instinct to barge into the next room over with every fiber of his being, and, making fists by his sides and pacing the floor and hating himself was all that seemed capable of occupying his mind just then.
Heâd knocked on the bathroom door at least ten times. Heâd been ignored each time, no matter the duration.
He still had your blood on his thumb, and it made him ill.
You said you wouldnât hurt me, Bucky.
While he uncurled his hand from a fist just long enough to stare at the streaks of red stretched over his finger, he heard those words replay over and over again in his head. Heâd said itâswore itâhimself, and still your blood was turning a cool, dark, dry shade of crimson on his thumb.
This wasnât how heâd meant for any of this to go. Still, notwithstanding his best intentions, none of it mattered. Heâd seen a sincere look of fear in your eyes looking up at him, and nothing in the world would change what heâd done, or who he was. Heâd caused you pain tonight, last weekâthough his memory of that was still so hazy and dark he hardly knew what else had happened, even nowâand above all, heâd failed you as a husband, a protector.
You were likely curled up in a ball by the bathroom sink, cowering in fear because of him. The thought sent another tidal wave of nausea thrumming through his skull, a lump in his throat growing larger alongside it, and before he knew what he was doing, Bucky was striding back to the bathroom door. He banged his fist against it.
âHoney?â
No answer.
âBaby, please open the door.â
More silence.
The moment brought to mind a memory from the night you two had been married. How youâd fled to the en-suite bathroom and locked yourself in it; how Bucky had rattled the whole doorframe with the force of his knocks, demanding you come out. Heâd hardly known you then. You hardly knew him now. The realization of this made the weight in his throat all the more excruciating as he stood, and, wincing with pain, Bucky kept knocking.
âIâm sorry, honey, Iâm so sorry.â
Pleading now. His voice was hoarse all over again.
Had he been the slightest bit more desperate and reckless, he mightâve been tempted to muscle through, kick the door in with his boot. But Bucky knew better. He could already guess how much that action would terrify you now, while tending to an injury that he himself had inadvertently made worse. Barreling inside would be neither romantic nor sweet, just sinking what may then be a lethal dose of salt in the deeper, metaphorical wound. He refrained. Instead of continuing to knock, he dropped his forehead to the door and closed his eyes.
âPlease believe me, baby,â he tried again.
Heâd said it so quietly he feared you might not hear it. Then, a little bit louder, âPlease, please believe me.â
No sound to be heard inside but running water.
âYou mean everything to me, doll.â
By now, his voice was clogged with pain, teetering on the brink of agony as he rested his hands on the door, and willed you to open it. Say something to him. Anything.
âIâd never mean to hurt you. Not in a million years.â
For a moment, he heard nothing more. Just how desperately he needed to hear a voice in reply could not be overstated. Craving a new sound worse than oxygen in his lungs. At first, when he heard something other than himself nearby, it nearly knocked him back with joy.
A voice right next to his ear, âBut you did, didnât you?â
The joy lasted less than a second.
The voice beside him was low. And close. Not coming from the other side of the bathroom door, as he mightâve reasonably expected from you, and not even in the tone of a femaleâs voice, as he mightâve seen, were Sharon to have appeared by his side. This new voice was deep, and masculine, and in his ear now, chuckling some as a gloved hand pressed the barrel of a gun to his temple.
Bucky didnât blink.
You stepped outside not wanting to see him.
The bleeding had long since stopped, thanks to the aid of a cool, damp washcloth and a few minutesâ pressure, but even once it ceased, your legs were reluctant to carry you back. You dreaded the thought of having to resume your conversation with Buckyâof having to look him in the eye and tell him all over again that it wasnât safe for you to be married to him. But you didnât have much of a choice now, either. This wasnât your honeymoon, where you could stay locked in the bathroom, try climbing out a window, and hope for the best like youâd done before. You had the manâs child inside you, for fuckâs sake.
That uncomfortable subject and at least a dozen more were already swarming your brain as you made your way out of the bathroom. Youâd taken a few extra squares of toilet paper to press into the cut, were looking down at it with a tense, uncertain gaze as you ventured out, when you were obliged to stop just a few steps into the room.
âHi, honey.â
It wasnât Bucky.
Your eyes snapped up to the source of the voice in an instant, and, on seeing you were rightâthat it wasnât Bucky but a gaunt, grinning blond with a gun to your husbandâs headâyou almost screamed at the sight.
Youâd wanted to scream, anyway. It wouldâve been the sane thing to do, and one that nobody couldâve blamed you for in the moment, you reckoned, but strangely the sound never came. You just stared at the two, eyes wide and jaw slightly more lax as your lips made an âoâ. Bile jumped up in your throat. You wished it would choke you.
âPlease. Donât.â was all you could get out.
Johann Schröderâs smile stretched wider.
âDonât what?â
The question was clearly meant to be derisive, rhetorical. Still, with your fingers trembling, you tried answering:
âDonât hurt hââ
âWhy?â
You watched the gun sink deeper against your husbandâs face, and he flinched. Your stomach clenched inside you.
âWhy shouldnât I hurt him, hon? Seems like heâs gotten pretty damn good at doing it to you,â Schröder sneered.
His words stung. The grin didnât flinch. And, as if to punctuate his sentence, or else remind your husband that he was tied to a chair and entirely at his mercy now, Schröder struck Bucky in the face with the butt of his gun. If an onlooker hadnât known better, they mightâve mistaken you for the one whoâd been hit, thoughâat last, you unleashed that scream, and you reached out for Bucky, hands open and pathetic and desperate to help.
âThink it hurt as bad as your hand?â Schröder hummed.
Your feet were stumbling forward, âHe didnât meanââ
Another resounding thud against Buckyâs skull, this time hard enough to split his lip in half. If heâd grimaced in the slightest, you wouldâve seen the teeth smeared with blood. But, true to form, James Barnes didnât wince. He hadnât even seemed to acknowledge the blow as it landed. Just stared at you and, with eyes as hollow and deadened and faintly pleading as youâd ever seen them before, manifested their silent apology to yoursâagain.
âBet he didnât mean to hurt anyone as the Winter Soldier, either. Still couldnât have felt too good for all the folks he butchered, though.â At that, Schröderâs sick amusement morphed into a laugh, and he was taking Buckyâs collar in his other hand. Shaking him lightly while he spoke.
âCouldnât have felt all that great for your dad, I bet.â
The diversion turned to you, all toothy smiles and mocking eyes. He didnât care. He let you stagger another step toward the two of them, even try to get your hands close to Bucky. But when youâd drawn too close, he stopped you cold. Not thinking much else in the moment, you made a move to push Schröderâs arm away, hard, and were shortly rewarded with a shove of your own. He knocked you sideways onto the bed, and you landed on the hand youâd hurt. Before you could let out so much as a sound yourself, Buckyâs voice tore in:
âSchröder.â
Schröder turned. He raised his Ruger to your husbandâs head again, as casually as if heâd asked him for the time.
âYes?â
âDonât touch her.â
Schröder turned to you. Though he didnât move the Ruger again, he did point his finger at your form, haplessly curled into itself amidst the covers and pillows.
âWhy? Saving all the rough stuff for later, are we?â
You cowered as his free hand reached for you, and just as your husbandâs eyes went wide and a vein nearly tore through his skin from how hard it protruded, you cried,
âWhat do you want?!â
Schröder stopped. He brought his hand to a halt just south of your thighâand then he dropped his weight on the bed beside you. He gestured indistinctly, almost disbelievingly, toward Bucky. The latter appeared near-apoplectic, nails raking down either arm of the chair.
âWhat do I want?â Schröder quipped, incredulous, âWhat do you want, doll? To stay married to him?â
And you knew heâd intended the question to be hurtful; you knew it by the glint in his eye, the goading tone of voice and the look heâd flitted to Buckyânondescript and yet saying a world more than words could ever convey. He knew what had gone on between you, had likely heard your last conversation in its entirety, and was now using it against you. Mostly to taunt, then to injure your husband with truths he hadnât yet uncovered himself.
Schröderâs eyes were shining with sadistic delight as he took your hand in his. He didnât waste another second.
âNo, no, that isnât what you want at all, is it?â
Ignoring the screech of Buckyâs restraints as he tried to lunge out of his chair. Hearing him curse when he failed.
ââyou said youâre leaving him, right?â
Schröder slid the thin, glistening ring off the hand heâd been holding before you could even think to stop him.
ââsaid you want a divorce, is that it?â
Then his grin got so big and conceited and enlivened by the sight of pain working its way onto Buckyâs face that any good sense youâd had left inside you was abandoned in a blink. You didnât hesitate, or else try and make a pass to retrieve your ringâyou just hit the man in the face.
Your fist was small, and his chin was hard. You knew before you ever threw the punch that itâd probably hurt you more than him, but you did it anyway. It succeeded, at the very least, in catching Schröder by surprise and swiftly pissing him off. Seeing this and feeling a bit bolder, you were somehow able to dodge his hands when he lurched for you again. Inside, your own anger flared.
âWhy the fuck do you care?â you spat.
You found momentary respite in the corner of the bed, sliding back against a wall that would only protect you for so long. As soon as Schröder regained his bearings, he had you back in his sights and his grasp just as quick.
He dragged you back. He pulled you up. He dug the tips of his fingers so hard into your side that you thought the flesh might tear in two across your ribs. But it didnât. Crescent-like indentations did leave their mark in a grisly set of five, though. You felt the sting of it as Schröder loosened his grip, then sucked his next breath through his teeth as if calming himself. Your gaze only hardened.
âI care,â he said, once heâd completed this slow inhale. He replaced his touch by pinching your face in one hand and bringing it up to his, expression more like a snarl. Then, raising the gun to your face in his other hand, âbecause I made a deal with your father. Remember?â
You did. Your head jerked back by force of instinct, but he held it. From every direction, then, you had nothing to hear but the sound of your own pulse thrumming a fast, panicked tempo in your skull. You tasted blood in your mouth without a drop on your tongue. And, had that deafening fear and revulsion been anything less, you likely wouldâve heard something else beneath it all.
Wouldâve felt it, if you werenât already so numb: Schröderâs hand sliding its way down your body, diamond ring still stuck to the tip of his index finger. You sensed it as though seeing yourself from another perspectiveâwatching his hand trail lower, lower, lower until something in Bucky split in two and he bellowed:
âSCHRĂDERââ
He said something more after that; you were sure of it. You just couldnât hear him, or see him, or discern much of anything else but your own racing heart as the man whoâd just beat your husband twice and lifted a gun to your head proceeded to press his touch to your belly. Almost conscientious and gentle as he lowered it.
âWas this part of the deal, too, doll?â
Your eyes widened. Realizingâthen feeling fear seize you completely. Forgetting the metal at your temple and shaking your head with a force, but slow enough that your husband wouldnât see it. Meanwhile, across from you both, Bucky seemed more than sufficiently occupied by his own blinding rageâhe spit a glob of blood to the floor and, with his teeth bared again, swore heâd kill him.
Over and over and over again, oaths of taking Schröderâs life and making it gruesome and painful and slow filled your ears, but none of it stuck, for either you or Schröder. Instead, your maniacal captor just smiled, leaning in.
âI said, was this part of the deal, Mrs. Barnes?â
The heel of his palm sank into your stomach, and as the shock of his first words began to fade, a pain replaced it. His hand made an impressive demonstration of flattening and forcing itself so hard against the skin that a flurry of stars cropped up in your eyes, and you cried:
âStop! I-It wasnâtâ justâ just stop. Stop.â
âStop? Was it part of the deal or not?â
Schröder bore down even harder.
âIt just happened!â you keened. Unsure why you felt compelled to answer for what had gone on at allâaddressing the baby in this awful, oblique wayâthough reckoning it had something to do with the pressure he was applying to your stomach. You tried to squirm back.
But your stuttering pulse and your pleading gaze and the ache in your stomach proved to be all too much for any real progress to be made. Youâd scarcely moved off an inch before he drove his palm deeper, and with the agony of a body about to rupture beneath it, a shriek clawed out of your throat. Your mouth fell open, and for once, you couldnât curtail the pain, or fear. Schröderâs hand had just forced the noise from your mouth, along with some mindless, broken pleas to stop pushing, it hurts, please, please, when the face above yours only brightened. Schröderâs cruel, snide mouth flashed a smile above you, and before you could whine againâ
He kissed you.
It couldnât have lasted for more than a second.
Still, the moment seemed to stretch indefinitely. And felt perverse. So deeply nauseating and unsettling to every last nerve, muscle, tendon, and bone in your body that the response it evoked could be nothing less than visceral. You didnât need to think at all to shove him off. Whatever mightâve given you pause with a loaded gun to your head was forgotten in a second, and soon enough, you werenât alone in letting your reproach be known.
It started off with a crack, then a harsh, crude splintering of wood. A violent rift, from what you could hear of it, and when you turned your head, your suspicions were confirmed: Bucky had snapped half the arm of his chair away from the seat, and his right hand was almost freed.
Whatever barrier he faced in being bound more than four times over with rope seemed immaterial to him now. He could strain as hard as he pleasedâfeel the coarse synthetic fibers dig into his flesh and leave streaks of red, if not break the skin itselfâand any pain, as before, hardly appeared to register with your husband at all. He just muscled through it, thrusting his wrist even harder. The whole force of this movement rocked the chair on its legs, and just when you sensed it might collapse beneath his weight, you felt Schröder stand up. The man didnât need to move too far or do much else other than drop his hold on you and flip his gun to point it at Bucky instead.
Even when he had, though, Bucky didnât flinch. His hands were in fists and his drive was like a machineâsâhe tried forcing his way out of the right handâs restraints, and the second the wood gave way, he was shoving it off.
Blind to the firearm Schröder was holding, or his words:
âStay where you are, Barnes.â
Bucky was just then shaking off the rope that had been loosened by the break in the wood, jaw still tight as ever.
âYouâve got three other limbs to free, my friend, justââ
Schröder was still speaking when you saw his finger slip to the trigger, and it seemed to you it was itching to pull.
âJames, stop!â
That plea came from you. More of a strangled cry, reallyâno more pleasant for either man to hear than it was for your throat to shriek. It did, however, stop Bucky cold. Your husband paused just long enough to meet your gaze. And in it, you saw, at least, that he was all there, if not enraged. But not soldat, or anyone else but himself.
You sighed in relief, despite what seeing two red rivers seeping out of Buckyâs mouth might otherwise provoke.
It was him. You mightâve smiled if another hadnât cut in.
Schröder seized Buckyâs wrist. With it, you saw his hand just as mangled and bloodied as his lips. Knuckles cracked, slit, and soon to be littered with bruises of every shade, he shocked you again by how calmly he took it. Even when Schröder sank a thumb inside a big, gaping crater of a flesh wound heâd found on the back of his hand, your husband didnât blink; he just looked at you.
âIâm sorry.â
When the barrel of the gun returned to his headâthis time, at the rear, as Schröder had circled back around the half-broken chair and was leaning over himâyou could see the apology lodged in his eyes on full display.
âFor safekeeping.â The man wielding the gun seemed almost pleased as he dropped your ring inside the breast pocket of your husbandâs shirt, before patting it gently:
âNow where were we?â
A beat. Buckyâs right hand twitched beside him, but evidently, he knew better than to move in that moment.
âRight, rightââ Schröder pretended to be remembering, tapping steel to Buckyâs skull, âSheâs leaving, isnât she?â
More silence.
You wanted to speak, beg Schröder for mercy, anything.
âDo you know why that is, Bucky?â
But before you could utter even a word of protest, the voice pressed on. Schröder was leaning in his ear.
ââwhat you did to her?â
The baby. Brooklyn. All the bloodshed that had ensued last week, leaving your husband completely in the dark. Of course, he couldnât remember. He hadnât been himself, and was scarcely more able to control his actions as the Winter Soldier than he could in a dream.
To your horror, Schröder reached down for Buckyâs hand, and, still holding the gun to him with the other, lifted it.
Pointed it.
Pushed it closer to you.
âCâmon, Buck. You donât want me touching her, right? Why donât you feel for yourself what sheâs been hiding?â
Your blood turned to ice. Youâd never felt so immobileâparalyzedâin your life, but seeing the hands drift closer and closer and feeling defenseless to their course, your body went numb. Your limbs grew heavier than lead.
And when you felt the smug, smiling blond guide your husbandâs touch toward your head, you understood it all.
You were perched at the edge of the bed a foot away. Schröder was nudging Bucky forward in his chair, urging him to reach out and tilt her chin a little, go on, thatâs it. And neither one of you had a choice, so he touched you. His fingers, directed by someone else, were obliged to brush the skin of your chin, your jaw, your cheek, and your brow, before finally settling above your left temple.
Your husband felt the cutâtouched the stitches.
You winced, but not from any physical pain. It was Buckyâs face as the tips of his fingers skimmed the wound. The look of chagrin that crossed his eyes. Then bewilderment. Fear, as plain as anyone could see itâ was he the cause of that? Had the hurt been from him?
You couldnât bear to answer him, so you looked away. It was Schröder, again, who had all the power to speak.
âCanât remember pushing her down?â he said, tone dark, âMaking her split her head open on the bedside table because soldat didnât know his own strengthâonly that he had to keep her safeâand sensed a threat outside?â
Bucky shook his head. His face was grave.
Schröder kept making him prod the skin.
âItâs bruised here, too. You feel it?â
Your husband did, and you thought it might break him. So tender and forlorn were the eyes, raking over every spot where a touch, his touch, had left you hurt before.
If nothing else could bring you back to your senses, the wounded look in Buckyâs gaze was sure to get it done.
You hardly thought again, just croaked: âItâs not his fault.â
Schröderâs hand then descended your neck, your torso.
As if he hadnât heard you at allâ
âYou already saw what happened to her hand.â
âand forcing Buckyâs touch lower still.
âBut what about here?â
Your breath hitched in your throat when you felt your husbandâs hand come to rest on your stomach.
It was like a fire had ignited in your lower half, and nothing close to the soft, pleasurable kind. Not the flutter felt in anticipation of a touch from your husband, not the desirous sort. In fact, you dreaded it now; seeing Schröder over his shoulder, urging him closer, making him flatten his big, broad, scorching palm over your belly.
What shouldâve been the ecstatic scene youâd conjured in your mind at least a hundred times since marrying himâthe picture of domestic bliss as you said it, smiling, Iâm pregnantâwas now nothing short of torture. Choice all but stripped from you here, forced to emerge inside this terrible place, you found yourself needing to shrink back, shake your head, look to Schröderâs stubborn, unyielding gaze and beg him not to make you do this now. Not now.
Not here, with Buckyâs skin a shade of glacial white and his eyes going wide, taking on a look youâd never seen.
âWhat do youââ
He stared hard at the hand on your belly, but it didnât last for long. As if realization were trying to seep in, he couldnât meet it. His eyes flitted back to your face.
âBaby, whatâsââ he tried again, stammering.
ââright, thatâs it, Mr. Barnes.â That was Schröder.
Satisfied in the suspense of the moment keeping your husband still, he lifted his hand from Buckyâs and snapped, thatâs it, and clapped him over the shoulder.
Congratulating him before the truth had even sunk in.
âA baby, thatâs right! Youâre going to be a father, Buck.â
And how far was the look on Buckyâs face from the one youâd dreamed before. The lips youâd envisioned in a smile now twisting bleakly, parting slightly, and the eyes youâd once hoped to be bright and elated only staring back with rings of red enveloping the irises. Whatever tears formed at his waterline were decidedly not of joy.
Only guilt.
âYou did it.â
Desperation.
More moisture in his eyes as his hand started to tremble across your stomach, voice hoarse and soft, âIs it true?â
You didnât need to nod. You just watched him, let your own eyes fill with the worst, stinging tears you had felt in your life, and from the silence that followed, Bucky knew.
As if the life beneath his palm were something dear, but still too much for him to comprehend, he shook his head. He stroked his thumb over the cotton of your pyjamas and tried inching closer, as much as his restraints would allow him. Then, with words that were audibly strained, but always gentle, he lowered his voiceâas if to keep the communication between you two, despite your position:
âI love you.â
His hand was still on your belly as he said it. He reached up to cup your face. Even lower than before, âIâm sorry.â
Iâm sorry.
That much was evident from every look heâd given you tonight. Every move he made a de facto apology, all actions in the vein of atonement, it couldnât possibly escape your mind or his that he knew heâd done wrong. It was only a matter of accepting thisâmaybe coming to terms with the fact that your life wasnât safe in his handsâfor the guilt plaguing Bucky to multiply. Paralyze him.
There was no better time for Schröder to strike. Just as the anguish had flooded Buckyâs face completely, and his hand had had to lower itself from want of strength, a sound split the air. Bucky was so lost in his thoughts that it didnât even register at first, but the impact was real, and it was harsh: Schröder punched him squarely in the jaw. The next, swift snap was his nasal bone taking a blow, and breaking beneath it. Blood breezed down and into his mouth. Feeling warm, his lips and chin doused in a second, he sensed nothing else. He mightâve groaned.
He caught another swift right hook, and his mind went blank. Nothing of substance threatened to materialize between his ears, save for the rush of blood through and from his skull and the dim recognition of something ugly.
Something horrific.
He couldnât protect you.
His body was as much an idle waste as it was a danger. Useless now, as he was tied to this chair, and a risk to your well-being even if he werenât. The hazard was him.
Schröder hit him again, and Bucky realized that the ringing heâd heard in his ears was your screaming.
âIâm doing her a favor,â Schröder spat before shoving him back in the chair, almost knocking it sideways.
The blond advanced with ease. His knuckles were drenched in blood; none of it was his. When he reached for Bucky again, the resistance was slight, and a simple, firm grip on the collar was all that was needed to drag his frame to sit straight. Bucky was barely upright for a second before the nextâand worstâblow struck his face. His whole head rang with it, reeling, but still, he could make out the words as they were spoken to him.
âSheâll never be safe with you, Barnes. Neverââ and at the last, Schröder lowered his gun. Started to loosen the rope from Buckyâs left arm, ââI could free you now, and you still wouldnât get within an inch of what you want.â
He nudged the rope away and let it fall to the floor. Bucky lifted his hand, but the effort was in vain. No sooner had a finger of his stirred than Schröder was delivering a kick to the chair and letting it splinter. Topple. Skitter a half-foot across the hardwood floor with Buckyâs ankles still bound to it, before finally, gracelessly, breaking apart.
Bucky was on the floor, blinking through a stream of blood and a sea of muddied thoughts when Schröder kicked the chair again. The rope slackened some more.
âHer own father knew as much, so he made me a deal to take her off of your hands. Settle his debts the way he shouldâve done the first time around,â Schröder said, and now his tone was lower. Lethal as it ever was, and stern.
âI know how much you hate to lose your playthings, Buck, but this oneâs better off with me, I promise.â
And, as if to emphasize his point, Schröder turned and reached for you. Buckyâs own hands were slow, fumbling in fits and bursts to get the rope unwound from his ankles, but they were determined. He just couldnât get the bleeding to stop, the ringing to subside, or his brain, in its concussed state, to let him move with a little more agility. Heâd been hit too many times. He could barely lift his head off his shoulders and hold it straight, so he was forced to stay where he was, keep at his task, and listen.
âYouâre weak when youâre not soldat.â
Using his knuckles, Schröder brushed the blood that was evidently all Buckyâs across your cheek, and you flinched.
âWhen you make the switch, stillâŠyouâre inhuman.â
Then he tilted your head, making you show them both the mutilated, stitched-up flesh above your temple. Again, you tried to slink away, but his touch was firm.
âDonât you think your bride deserves better than that? Your child? Forced to live in fear of that thing you are?â
Blood coursed down Buckyâs face, and his lips were curled apart in a grimace, mouth hanging slightly ajar. His eyes fixed their look on you. The rope was undone.
Heâd just started to try and stand when the edge of his vision blurred. He felt the lacerations in his face pulse as one, and with it, half his sight went skewed to the left. Schröder couldnât help but crack a smile seeing him stumble, pitch back, and barely catch himself on the bedside table. When he stood, he was mostly hunched.
âLook at you, Buck. You canât try and save her like this,â Schröder taunted, drawing you closer, âSo stop trying.â
The manâs hand was like ice holding your face. The grip grew tighter when he saw your husband limping your way, and before either one of you could move, the index of Schröderâs other hand had slid down to the trigger. He didnât wait to give another warning before he did itâjust pointed the gun and fired one shot over Buckyâs head.
His aim was good. The bullet missed your husband by less than an inch. The gun had gone off by your ear, and immediately, you seized the side of your head as a sharp, searing pain cropped up. Your skull was still ringing when you heard the thing discharge again, and you realized it had been aimed at Buckyâs neck. Heâd ventured another step, and Schröder had fired a second round to graze the top of his shoulder. Crimson bloomed through his shirt.
Bucky shouldâve stumbled again. He mightâve staggered back with a grunt of pain, lifted a quick, reflexive hand to feel the wound, but the sense of it all was slow to reach him. The moments that passed him were delayed just the same, as if the world around him were distortedâthe fibers of time tugged and stretched before his eyesâand he could hardly keep himself straight. When he got another look down the barrel of the gun, he didnât blink. Couldnât see, really. It was all misshapen sights and sounds and a dim recognition that his mind was in a fog.
Somewhere from within that mist, he heard, faintly:
âIâll goâ Iâll goâ Iâll go with you, Iâll goâ just stop.â
Schröder turned to you, and the smile that he wore was cruel, but Bucky wasnât able to make out the expression.
All he could see then, to the faintest extent, was youâyour face, gripped hard in another manâs hand, eyes pleading and wet with tears, and a slightly slack jaw.
âLeave him for me?â Schröder repeated, sneering.
You nodded. Blinked. Rolled your tongue along the inside of your cheek before pulling it back and biting down once. There was a hint of a wince in your eyes, but, from what Bucky could tell, it vanished just as fast as it came.
Your lips parted again. Your eyes widened a little.
âSo the girl has some fucking sense.â That was Schröder.
Heâd had his weapon re-holstered and your face firmly seized in both of his hands in no more than a second.
What came next surprised no one, though the sensations of disgust and rage were as quick to turn a stomach as the shock would have done. Schröder bent down and, having pulled your face closer to his, kissed you again.
Schröderâs mouth was glistening with a grin and Buckyâs own bloodâsmeared all over your face from how hard heâd been holding youâwhen he looked up and turned.
âSensible and sweet, isnât she? Tastes like it, too.â
Bucky saw nothing but red. It wasnât just blood crowding his vision now but violence and rancor and outright hatred, stirring his limbs to start moving again when the rest of his body was plainly too battered to venture an inch in that condition. He staggered again, watched you again, and had made it almost halfway across the room when another sight slowed him, if only for a moment.
Schröderâs lips were back on yours, as if to mock him, but what startled him, really, was the way youâd opened your mouth. You couldnât mean it. Clearly. Schröder was gripping your jaw, forcing it openâit had to beâand he was coaxing your tongue out from inside and weaving it with his. Once more, time moved like molasses, and that was all your husband had had to see: you kissing him back, gripping his arm through the thick, black tactical gear, and still parting your lips more and more for him. Like you needed a touch, or something, worse than ever.
That stalled Bucky, though he was nowhere close to stopping now. Briefly preoccupied, and seemingly shocked as well that youâd accepted the kiss so eagerly this time, Schröder didnât see the approach. If he had, he likely wouldâve turned and made a move for his Ruger, but as it was, he had only to blinkâand there was Bucky.
He hit him with a force that was blinding, directly to the side of his head so hard that heâd had no choice but to separate from you. Schröder was stunned one second and on the floor in the next. Bucky threw him there, kicked him down, and, wavering for only a moment to cock back the shoulder thatâd been shot, he ignored the pain and punched the man again. And again. And again.
There was a callousness, an indolence, and an ease with which he was able to inflict the pain, that much was evident. What didnât seem so natural, at least in Buckyâs mind, was the weight that was in his hands: Schröderâs body felt limp before heâd even landed the second blow.
The pressure grew heavier and heavier in his hands the harder, and more frequently, he delivered each hit, but for now, he didnât care. Bucky kept on punching until the face beneath him was gnarled and bloody, and his own fist, too, slashed every which way with more cuts than he was able to count. He wouldâve kept goingâcouldâve ignored the stabbing pain in his shoulder for as long as it would take to ensure the man was deadâbut as it was, he refused to ignore the voice he heard. It was yours.
Muffled now, as your body was bent to the side and your head drooped lower still. Your voice was soft but clear:
âBucky, please, stop.â
He did.
He dropped the manâs collar from his hands as soon as heâd heard you say it, and he turned away as if nothing had transpired behind him at all. His focus was on you.
âBabyââ
To his surprise, he watched you spit on the floor.
Your face was grim and almost sick, and you spit again.
The look grew even worse, and afterward, you didnât waste a second more; you stood and left the room.
Bucky was stunned at first, and his instinct had been to follow. Then he heard a rattling sound beside him. He glanced down and paled, seeing Schröder there.
His face had turned blue much sooner than Bucky had expectedâand not from any bruising but a lack of oxygen in his lungs. He was choking, foaming slightly at the mouth while he gasped for air. Surely, it hadnât been the hits that caused it. The whites of Schröderâs eyes were as conspicuous as heâd ever seen them. Desperate.
Bucky swiftly got the sense that the life of his former captor was lost, and frankly, he didnât care enough to watch him die. He left what remained of Schröderâs form to continue writhing on the floor, choking and sputtering for a breath that would never come, and went after you.
Downstairs, he found you hunched over the kitchen sinkâspitting, retching, and trembling, too, but breathing.
You let the water from the faucet fill your mouth, and you rinsed again. You winced as something stuck your cheek.
Bucky drew closer, quickly, and when he was right by your side, he saw you spit a shard of glass into the sink. He looked over to the counter, and he spotted three more
They were minuscule, really. Nothing quite the size to leave a wound too deep, but sharp enough to cut your lips, your tongue, or the insides of your cheeks. When Bucky leaned in, he saw droplets of red joining the flow of the water beneath it. You coughed over and over again
âDonât,â you croaked, seeing Bucky reach for the glass.
Before he could reply: âItâs the poison. From Madripoor.â
Your husbandâs blood went cold in his veins. He didnât touch the glass, but he did press closer to you, feeling his insides churn as the cogs started to turn in his head.
The vial of poison youâd been given to slip in Schröderâs drink at the Foxy Denâhow the hell had you gotten it back? Why would you think you needed it, if heâ but no, that couldnât be the case. There wasnât a shot you justâ
ââput it in your mouth?â Bucky couldnât curb the fear in his voice. He reached for you and spun you to face him.
âDid it kill him?â
Your eyes were wide for entirely different reasons. Bucky couldnât believe what he was seeing; his mouth was dry.
âI didnât want to kiss him,â you went on, voice shaking a little, âI didnâtâ I justâ I couldnât get him the poison any other way. I knew heâd kiss me again, and when he didââ
âI know,â Bucky said. He smoothed the hair from your face, shaking his head. Feeling his stomach clench with fear and dread as he hurried to get a look in your mouth.
Youâd snuck the vial inside your cheek, then crushed it between your teeth before Schröder had kissed you. Youâd all but forced him to swallow the poison, shoving your tongue down his throat, but what of the stuff that remained? The rough, trembling fingers of Buckyâs hand were trying to pry your lips apart as gently as they could, ensure all the serum was out, but at present, you wouldnât let him. You pushed back gently, though not too far to prevent your own touch from roaming his shoulder.
âThe bulletââ you started.
âBarely nicked me,â Bucky cut in, âBaby, I need to seeââ
That youâre safe. That you wonât be hurt in any way. He couldnât finish the thought himself, having seen what the poison did to Schröder. Instead, he just held you closer and fought the lump that was starting to form in his throat. Adrenaline had worked well enough to clear his mind of the haze, but the rest of him was all high-strung.
Your clothes clung to you both, wet with blood and sweat. Your breaths were fast. Your expressions were feral, eyes no calmer as they scanned over the otherâs form and soaked in every trace of what had happened. Bucky in his formalwear and you in something close to a chemiseâlike your honeymoon night all over againâyou each got a glimpse of the gore ornamenting yourselves and let the room fall quiet, if only for a minute or two.
Your husband was the one to break the silence, at length, with cracked and grisly hands sliding down to your hips.
âYouâre okay?â
His touch shifted you back in place to sit on the counter.
âIâm alright.â
You wanted to say more; assure him, in a voice as sedate as you could manage, that this wasnât his fault. Whether he would believe a word of what you said was a separate question, but, at any rate, it didnât matter. The next thing you knew, Bucky was slotting himself in the space between your legs and pulling you into his arms.
In spite of himself and all the wounds, he held you tight.
âYouâre alright,â he repeated.
His face sank into the crook of your neck, and you felt his muscles contract againâpulling you closerâas he drew a shaky breath against your skin. You hugged him back.
âAre you?â Your voice was small.
In a blink, Bucky resurfaced. He lifted his head from your neck and, still holding you, hadnât seemed to have heard.
âThe baby,â he said quickly.
He stepped back. Lowered his gaze and his hands to trail over your hips and near your stomach, and he stared, as if trying to make sense of something dire. His blue eyes were wide, and they assumed such a look of panic that you feared a blood vessel might actually burst in one.
After all the great lengths heâd gone to, ensuring you were safe and taking extra precautions, on the off-chance you might be pregnant, here you were.
And there he went, sliding his touch lower and lower again until his hand was pressed into your belly, and the gaze youâd once thought soft before had all but melted into tendernessâdelicacy. Complete, loving unreserve.
When his eyes met yours a second time, they were shiny.
Wet with the only kind of tears youâd want to see in them.
âYouâre reallyâŠâ he started, just to taper off, blinking.
And then his cheeks were dotted with the tiny, round droplets, and heâd finally ventured a smile for the first time in what seemed like ages and you couldnât keep from reaching for him. The second youâd lifted your arms you were back in his, lips and nose smushed against the front of his stained white button-up and breathing deep.
Or trying to, anyway. Bucky had you squeezed so tight to his chest you had nothing but his shirt to inhale at first. You didnât mind, and when he pulled away a moment later, you realized that your eyes, too, were filling up quick. You had to steel yourself against a maelstrom of emotions that threatened to emergeâthe aftermath of a half-dozen traumas laid bare over the last hourâbut the longer you were here, and the more your husband stared at you like that, the quicker your courage was depleted. In the span of five seconds, your senses were shot to hell. All you could think was what you could feel, and all you felt was Bucky: his arms and his hands and the raw, blistering heat between your bodies. The rest was noise.
It surprised you both when you kissed him. Physically, your mouth and his were hardly up to do it, injured as they were, but the impulse was strong, and it flowed between you. As soon as your lips latched onto his, Bucky was holding your face, molding his body to yours without so much as a second thought, and the mouth you met was sturdy. Hungry in the way it kissed back.
A string of words from Schröder flashed in your mindââNever be safeââand you grit your teeth together, snagging the cusp of Buckyâs lower lip as you did it. He groaned. Before you could even try to apologize, though, he was gripping your face harder in his hands and coaxing your mouth open with his tongue. His front was still flush with yours, and your legs were starting to wind around his hips. Your husband nudged you back against the cabinets, and from the force of that push, you felt it.
Felt him.
Surely, it had had to take two very fucked up individuals to get all hot and bothered from a bloodbath that had just taken place; but, again, here you wereâtogether.
And there you went, grinding your lower half with his.
âDoll?â Bucky broke out, word slurred just a little.
For a second, you thought he was going to stop you. Your eyes scanned his, and you were already planning to apologize for being so horny, it must just be theâ
âYou know I love you, right?â he breathed.
You blinked. You were about to nod, when you felt the bulge in his slacks start to rub against your barely-clothed heat, and something akin to a shockwave coursed through your frame. It couldnât be helped. A monsoon of hyper-sensitized pleasure trembled over the skin in a way youâd never felt it before, and suddenly you were letting out a moan: a muffled cry of, âYes, I-I know.â
Your husband swallowed and stared, slightly taken aback by the reaction his erection had produced. Heâd never felt that either. At least from what he could remember.
The truth was that heâd never had a pregnant wife beforeâsomeone whose body was now extraordinarily responsive to his touch, nearly aching for him.
When you scooted your butt to the edge of the counter and dug your heels in the backs of his legs, humping him, almost, he got the idea. Bucky swallowed again.
âI love you too, Iâ Iââ you started, already out of breath, âI just really need you to fuck me. Can youâ pleaseââ
Bucky didnât need to be asked once, much less twice. He already had his belt, button, and zip undone before you could even look down, and then your own pyjama shorts were sliding off too. The counter was cool against your skin, but your husbandâs warmth was more than enough to compensate for the loss. You smiled again, sheepish.
âItâs justâŠhormones,â you said, quieter toward the end.
You werenât sure why you felt so ashamed to simply say, âJames, Iâve been damn near insane with desire ever since you put a baby in me. Can you give me five more?â But you did. You felt your cheeks start to heat as your lower half was left exposed to the air, and Bucky slipped his hand down between your legs, practically groaning:
âHoney, youâre soaked.â
There wasnât one iota of shame in his tone.
He was more than happy to find you drenched beneath his touch. He had a smile on his face and a warmth bleeding from every fingertip as he caressed that soft, tender spot. You didnât need to tell him what was on your mind, either. He sensed something was making you shy, and rather than have you say it aloud, he just touched you gentler, stroked the skin more affectionately, and tilted his head so only you could hear him, quiet as ever:
âThatâs my girl. Feeling good for me?â
You felt your heartbeat between your thighs.
âMy baby,â Bucky went on, voice dulcet and slow.
Your body was trembling at the edge, waiting. Impatient.
âMy wife,â he said that with a smile, into your neck.
He lowered you onto his length, and you whined.
âMother of my child.â The smile got bigger.
You couldnât see it, but you could feel it. Feeling him slide inside the most precious, wet, pliable part of you, stretching you out, you couldnât help the sounds you made. You felt full in a whole new way; the groan Bucky let out when you were impaled down to the base of his cock said he shared the feeling. He throbbed inside you.
âYouâreâfuck.â Buckyâs words broke off at the sensation.
Your walls were as slick as ever, your body delicate, rolling your hips to the first gentle thrusts that his shaft carved inside. Neither one of you could last long like this.
Still, at the threat of sublime pleasure, you felt fear, briefly: Schröderâs implacable stareâand the thousands more like him in HYDRA. You couldnât help but grip Bucky tighter, willing these thoughts away with the rhythm of your body over his. Feeling him fill you up, fuck you with quick, deliberate thrusts and hold you, âThatâs it, take what you need, sweet girl, youâre okay.â
You wished you were. You wanted to be. With every stab of Buckyâs hips, you hoped this would be the last night you ever feared for you or your childâs life, but deep down, you knew that wasnât true. This was everything your husbandâs varied âenterprisesâ entailed, and a life with him meant never knowing a day without itâfear.
The head of Buckyâs cock grazed an especially sensitive ridge in your walls, and you whimpered into his shoulder.
You smelled blood.
He pushed you back against the counter and pounded harder, breaths heavy and labored and gruff as he spoke:
âYouâre okay, baby, itâs alright.â
Your mind tried clinging to that thought, nodding along as if to convince yourself. The pleasure grew stronger, and your body was hot. Everything was heightened. Bucky couldnât keep his eyes or his lips or his rough, bloodied touch from roaming you wherever he could reach, and he kept rutting his hips, assuring you gently, again and again, that it was all okay. He was right here.
The pleasure from the depths of your body was beyond your controlâyou couldnât help it when the band inside of you snapped. You held Bucky closer and you moaned, more desperate and needy and soaking for him, taking something from him, and knowing the bliss you felt would only steal the dark thoughts for a moment or two.
Buckyâs eyes said it just the same. He couldnât keep stuffing you full, feeling his pleasure hit its peak, and finally painting your insides without sharing that look.
You were less than halfway down from your highs when you felt him go still, panting fast, then hold your face.
âI love you.â
It was desperate. Hoping for something.
âI love you, too,â you told him, and you meant it.
But there was more. Both of you knew there was more.
âI canât be married to you, Bucky.â
You didnât know why it had to come out now, but the emotions were thereâhis gaze had all but drawn it out.
Still sheathed inside you, your husband tensed. He looked as if he might try and shake his head, but the movement was stalled by his own momentary shock. Heâd known the words were coming, but the sound of you saying them now wasnât any less jarring to hear. Before he could reply, you found yourself cutting back in:
âNot now, at least. We need someâŠtime. To think.â
You werenât sure what you were saying, just that your lips were moving and every new word was hurting him more.
âEven with Schröder gone, there are so manyâŠdangers for bothâor, allâof us, and I donât knowâŠI just canâtââ
âimagine bringing a child into a world like this. Like his.
You didnât need to say it.
The pain in Buckyâs eyes already communicated as much, and the conviction in your own only convinced him that youâd meant itâand what you said was the truth. You couldnât stay in a marriage that wasnât safe.
Just as you opened your mouth to say something more, the man surprised you when he squeezed your hand.
Nodding, almost imperceptibly, in front of you.
âI can wait,â he said, âWhenever youâre ready, doll.â
His voice was hoarse, words strained from the lump in his throat as he spoke, but the message was sincere.
âWhenever you feel safe,â he added, softly.
You wanted to hold him again. Like before, your eyes began to well with something stinging and harsh, but the look youâd fixed on him was filled with nothing but love. You wouldâve reached for him then, if he hadnât moved his hand to his pocket. He felt around inside it, briefly.
Then Bucky retrieved your wedding ring.
Holding you up against him, pressed snugly into the counter with your legs still wrapped around his lower half, he pinched the silver band between his forefinger and thumb and held it up to you. It glistened in the light.
âThe next time you wear it, I want it to be because you chose to marry me. Not for anything, or anyone, else.â
Nothing arranged, no game, no being forced to stay.
You nodded and had to blink through a layer of tears.
Buckyâs thumb traced the moisture, cupping your cheek in one of his hands. Heâd had to keep blinking himself, and before you could reach for him, he kissed you.
âI really hope you marry me again one day, Mrs. Barnes.â
You smiled, having parted but still holding on.
âI think I would like that, too. One day.â
The next thing you heard was a sound at the front door: what sounded like a crash. Half a dozen sets of feet stumbling inside, crowding the foyer, making a loud, frantic clamor that you and Bucky knew only too well. The two of you scrambled to get your clothes back on as Steve, Nat, Sam, and Sharon all seemed to yell at once.
You had one hell of a story to tell them.
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the black sheep
a/n:Â wrote this at five in the morning after i woke up from a nightmare âïž
summary: âdonât,â a sharp breath filled your lungs as you shook your head and your eyes instantly squeezed shut, âdonât do that⊠donât act like you care just because my father pays you. I know youâre no better than all of the others out thereâŠâÂ
warnings: soft!mob!bucky x mob boss daughter!reader, heavy angst, hurt/comfort, forbidden romance, age gap, sexual references, horrible and abusive family, bullying, mental illness (depression, anxiety, stress), references to being institutionalised at a terrible place against one's will, party, dancing, crying
word count: 1511
⌠gentle reminder that feedback, but especially reblogs are the way you support writers on here âœ
masterlist | join my taglistÂ

The creak of a heavy pair of boots crossing over the threshold found your ears, though didnât persuade your neck to twist around and see who had appeared in the doorway.Â
âMiss?â Buckyâs tone echoed quietly throughout the room as his metal hand continued to clutch the doorhandle heâd just twisted.Â
But instead of tearing your eyes away from the night sky that twinkled on the other side of the window, you instead continued to sit on the floor, the fancy dress youâd been forced into wrinkling around your legs, as you faintly began to murmur, âyou know, I wanted to be an astronaut when I was littleâŠâ your eyes traced one of the constellations gleaming above, âit wasnât because I had some fascination with space, but it was the one thing I could imagine that would take me as far away from here as possibleâŠâ a breath escaped you before your vision finally floated back down to earth and you glanced over your shoulder, âwould you mind closing the door? Itâs so loud out thereâŠâÂ
As you reunited your gaze to the world outside and you heard the door shut behind you, the mobster then carefully asked, âare you alright?âÂ
âDonât,â a sharp breath filled your lungs as you shook your head and your eyes instantly squeezed shut, âdonât do that⊠donât act like you care just because my father pays you. I know youâre no better than all of the others out thereâŠâÂ
âI donât know what youâre talking about,â he tried to conceal his painful awareness of your situation.Â
âI know what the others say behind my back,â you uttered, your mind haunted by their voices, playing the comments on a loop till they turned into boiling tar, âpoor Y/n, weak and broken Y/n who is crazy and could never really be a part of this family⊠but unfortunately for everyone, I am,â you breathed, memories of your adolescence flooded your system, how they had sent you away to a broken institution at the smallest sign of vulnerability, âso I could never just leave. I couldnât go out and earn my own money, they would cut off any attempt I made of getting a job in this city,â you pointed out their power, âand if I tried to get away, move to somewhere else, then they would have to take care of that as well because they canât have a liability just out there. They own me, and theyâve made sure that I am nothing without them, and with them, Iâd never be able to accomplish a goddamn thing. They wouldnât hesitate to cut my life short if I ever stepped out of line again, you know that, it happened to my aunt⊠for all I know, itâll probably happen as soon as my brother takes over, it is after all what everyone has surely wished for since the day I was bornâŠâÂ
As those last few venting words escaped your lips, a sinking feeling bloomed in your stomach as you realised those shattering truths hadnât been contained in your thoughts alone.Â
âOh shitâŠâ tears began to blur your vision as you spun around and jaggedly rose to your feet, âplease donât tell anyone about any of that,â you took a panicked step forward, âIâ⊠I didnât mean any of it, itâs notââŠâ your chest rose and fell rapidly as you stared back at the gangster, âwhat do you want?â you attempted desperately, âdo you want money? I could talk to my father and give you another leg up? Iâll give you whatever you want, just please donât tell anyone, IââŠâÂ
An idea then struck through your terrified blubbering, and without giving it another thought, you dropped down to your knees before him.Â
âWhat are you doing?â he finally spoke, blinking down at you by his feet.Â
Wiping your cheek as a steady flow of tears rolled down them, you then reached out for Buckyâs belt and sniffled, âyou can have me, if thatâs what could buy your silence.âÂ
But instead, your fatherâs right-hand man grabbed your hands, âstop,â he pleaded, âjust stop.âÂ
Blinking up into his eyes, your hazy vision then drifted down to his fingers enveloping your wrists before you gloomily concluded, ââŠrightâŠof course⊠I get it,â your head bowed even further as you uttered, âwhy would you think of me any differently⊠of course, you wouldnât want me to touch you, you probably think Iâm cursed just like the rest of them doâŠâÂ
But instead of ripping his touch away from your skin as if it was a scorching flame, Buckyâs frame suddenly lowered to be at your level, kneeling by you before he lifted one of your palms up to cup his stubbly cheek.
âI donât,â a faint shake found his head, ânever have,â you found yourself floating away into the ocean of his eyes as he stared back at you, his slow breath fanning across your wet cheeks at the close proximity, âI wonât tell anyone what you said,â he promised, his deep voice nearly at a whisper, âyou have my word.â
But as you were filled with equal amounts of uncertainty, as well as shock, footsteps on the other side of the door found you both and tore you apart, just before the door ripped open and in strolled the boss himself.Â
âBarnes!â your fatherâs glare landed on the mobster first before it shifted to find you, hastily wiping your cheeks, âoh great, you found her,â he uttered impatiently, âdarling, come, itâs time for your brother to cut the cake. You need to be there,â he swiftly waved a hand for you to shadow him.Â
The storm of the party made you feel as if you could come undone and burst into tears at any moment, pushing and shoving your shaky soul till you felt like just a tiny speck of dust floating around in the air. Keeping your gaze on the floor as you pushed through the bustling crowds, it stayed there as your sibling sank a shiny blade into the ridiculously elaborate cake that was rolled out for everyone to applaud.Â
Raw and bleeding while the others drank and laughed, your vision finally found enough courage to flicker up, though only to find those same blue eyes, across the room and locked upon you.Â
When the music soon was cranked up high and people swarmed to the middle of the floor in pairs, you briefly spotted one of your brotherâs friends, a guy not too far from your own age, march straight towards you with an air of confidence that couldnât help but relax your tense shoulders as you were slowly filled with hope.Â
But as he neared and a greeting fell from your lips, a confused look muddled up his features as he shot you a glance before grabbing the waiting hand of a girl standing in the crowd behind you.Â
Amused snickers and cruel comments found your ears even though you knew their tones attempted to be silent.
âWhat a freak.â
âCould you imagine if it had actually been her heâd wanted to dance with? In her dreams.â
âShe should just run back to that insane asylum she somehow escaped from.â
With your back soon pressed up against one of the perimeter walls, a shadow then came to darken the spot on the floor your reddened eyes were glued to.Â
âYou wanna dance?â you glanced up with a wide pair of eyes to spot Bucky settled in beside you.Â
âWhy?â your brows knit together, âso that everyone can have another thing to laugh about?âÂ
Holding out his palm, he then let out a sigh, âjust take my hand,â and the next thing you knew, your fingers were tangled in his own.Â
Once heâd led you out onto the floor, your eyes darting around to all the bewildered glances that shot your way, a sudden breath then filled your lungs as his wide palm slid over your waist and dragged you in closer to his frame, causing your vision to cease their torture and meet his own steady gaze instead.Â
The sway was slow and intimate, though you werenât sure if the sensation terrified or calmed you, as the intoxicating way he made you feel had previously been something youâd packed far away as just an inconsequential crush back when heâd first started working for your father. Though as he held you in his arms and showed you a rare display of compassion, how could your heart not begin to thump once more?
With your gaze hazily cast over his shoulder as you danced so near that your cheeks almost touched, the warmth of his hand then slid down to your lower back before he whispered in your ear, âI know it wonât fix anything, but if it was up to me, youâd be the one inheriting this whole business, not your brother,â he uttered sincerely under his breath, âheâs a hot-headed idiot, while you are stronger and more brilliant than all of these fools combined.â

© 2025 thyme-in-a-bubbleÂ
#leaâs writing#bucky barnes angst#bucky barnes hurt/comfort#bucky barnes fluff#bucky barnes x reader#mob!bucky#mob!bucky barnes#mafia!bucky barnes#mob!bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes imagine#mafia!bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes au#mob boss daughter!reader
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Adore Her, Dior Her
prompt: ( requested ) what good is having all that money if he can't spend it on the woman he loves?
pairing: Mafia!Bucky Barnes x female!reader
fandom masterlist: Marvel
word count: 4.3k+
warnings: author foams at the mouth for Mafia AUs, overwhelming fluff, cursing, not edited.
"That's the one. That's one we should get!"
"You've said that about the past three dresses, Buck!" You groaned, smoothing your hands over the skirt. "We need to narrow this down, okay? The wedding's in a month!"
"Why did we even agree to go?"
You glared, "'Cause we love my brother and we're supporting him."
"But she's just so - "
"Jen. Her name's Jen."
Bucky nodded, leaning back on the cushioned chair, "Well, Jen's just wrong for him. Literally the definition of toxic."
"Does it count if they're toxic together? To each other?" You sighed, standing on the pedestal and turning to look in the three mirrors beside the dressing room.
"Of course it does," he stood, buttoning his suit jacket out of habit. He approached you, head cocking as he looked your body up and down to get the full view of the gown you tried on. "You're really okay letting him marry her? Turn this way a bit, baby, lemme see the front."
You scoffed, but took his offered hand and twisted on the small platform towards him, "You were there at Christmas, he doesn't listen to reason. So, if Daniel's convinced Jen's for him, as his sister, my only job is be supportive."
"They literally abuse each other," he pointed out.
"Well, he's not changing his mind. Okay? It's been three years, he won't budge, whenever someone brings up them breaking up, he goes into hiding - so, I don't know what else I can do," your hands slapped your thighs when you shrugged, "except just be there for him. Now, focus, please, help me narrow a dress down."
He shook his head as you turned to face the mirrors again, "Actually, you know what? I don't think anything in this store is for us."
The attendant perked up and scurried over, rushing, "Oh, well, we have a much larger selection in the back, Mr. Barnes - "
"That won't be necessary, Barbra, thank you, though," he nodded. "Doll," his hand planted on your waist, head over your shoulder as you still looked yourself over in the mirrors, "go get changed, I know where we need to go."
"Bucky, no, there's plenty of options here," you argued, twisting on the wee little pedestal to face him again. "We don't need to drop a stack on a dress - "
"You let me worry about the price tag," he smirked, leaning in to peck your cheek. "Just go change, pretty girl, c'mon. Step-to!"
You offered Barbra, the attendant, an apologetic smile as you shuffled back into the changing room; quickly stripping from the dress. When you exited in your street clothes, Bucky was tipping the aged woman for her effort in gathering your options, but the moment he saw you, his hand was extending to hold yours tightly.
"What was wrong with that store?" You asked when you stepped onto the noisy and busy street to approach the sleek, tinted car Bucky drove for day-to-day errands.
"We're not shopping at David's fucking Bridal."
"You literally drove us here," you laughed.
"Yeah, and then I had a much better idea," he smirked at you, unlocking the car and opening your passenger door. "C'mon, princess, just gotta trust me."
"Last time you said that - "
"That wasn't my fault," he groaned, cheeks flaring red in embarrassment. When you opened your mouth to retort, he rushed, "Aht, nope, don't say shit. C'mon, I'm taking you somewhere special so get that pretty ass in the car."
He grinned when you laughed and did as bid, feet safely inside when he closed the door after you were settled. Bucky easily jogged around the back of his car, New York busy this time of year as traffic flew past on the street and forced Buck slow. He dropped into the driver's seat, sniffling slightly.
"Reminds me," Bucky smirked as he pulled onto the street, "how would you feel about us going to Aspen this winter?"
You sighed, "Why?"
"You wanna stay in New York for Christmas?"
"Well, yeah! It's so magical."
"Okay, so, we can go over New Years?"
You sighed, "You know, we don't have to go anywhere..."
"Sweetheart," he cleared his throat, "I actually have some business in Aspen, this will just help determine when I schedule the meetings for."
"Oh," you nodded slowly.
He sighed, "I know my job isn't orthodox, but business is business, right, sugar?â
"No, yeah, yeah, I get it. It sounds kinda nice, maybe we can go skiing."
"You know how to ski?"
"No, but I'm sure someone in Aspen could help teach me."
Bucky grinned. The drive was full of easy conversation, neither you nor Bucky dwelling on his business dealings, always feeling as if it was taboo given his station in the Mafia. So when he pulled up in front of a designer store, you gawked. "Now, if we can't find something here - "
"Um, absolutely not," you laughed. "Bucky, I can't even afford to walk into a place like that!"
"Good thing I'm paying," he smirked. He assisted you out of the car, tossing his keys to one of his security guards who had been following in a separate, tinted vehicle. When you both entered the dimly lit store, you were blown away by the gorgeous minimalist design; warm lighting, open floor space, and racks of different clothing options.
"Ah, Mr. Barnes! Hello, hello, hello!" A new attendant greeted with more enthusiasm than you would've greeted any of your clients, approaching you two. She shook your boyfriend's hand vigorously, "To what do we owe this pleasure?"
Bucky wrapped his arm around your waist, "Looking for a dress to wear to a wedding."
She offered you a forced smile, telling your boyfriend swiftly with her teeth on full display, "You came to the right spot!"
"See?" Bucky smirked at you. "All right, Valeria, what's first?"
Valeria waved you both onward to a private changing room, offering complimentary sparkling waters, coffees, teas - even offering to go retrieve anything you two would want from the Starbucks down the block. Valeria took your measurements and dress size, making idle chit-chat with Bucky and making it obvious he was a regular in the store, then scurrying off to collect an armful of options.
"This is - wow," you nodded in impression, petting the material of the display dresses hung along the wall.
"Like it?"
"It's growing on me," you eased with a small shrug, hearing Bucky chuckle and for his phone to chime. You perused the place as he became glued to the little device, sat in front of the dressing rooms.
Valeria returned with another attendant carrying coffees. "Right this way, Mrs. Barnes," Valeria directed you into a changing room, missing the giddy look you sent Bucky over your shoulder at being called his wife. "All right, so," she sighed, hanging up the dresses she selected, "I think these are modest enough for a wedding, but still glamorous to turn a few heads."
You hummed, "They're kinda short, don't know if that's the energy I want to be giving off at my brother's wedding."
"They'll fit differently once on but we can always accommodate," she assured, pulling one from the hanger. "Here we go," she assisted you, zipping you in and looking you over. "Oh, it's just darling on you! Look at that, not a single hair outta place, right?"
You giggled lightly, "It's certainly pretty."
"Shall we show Mr. Barnes?"
You nodded, following her out to reveal Bucky sitting on a plush loveseat, sipping his coffee. His eyes widened when he saw you, nodding, "Oh, yeah. This is what I'm talking about."
"Hush, we're only buying one."
His eyes rolled, "I'll buy the whole damn store if I want."
"You don't own it already? Hm," you teased, perking your brows.
"Keep sayin' shit, I'll cut a check right now - "
"Bucky," you tisked, moving to the runway mirrors. "It's a little tight, isn't it?"
"It's snug," Valeria agreed. "Is there a color scheme for the wedding?"
"Um," you paused, "I'm not sure - I just know it's in winter, like, in a month."
"Maybe a pretty powder blue?" She looked to Bucky, who nodded. "Or how about a pale green? Like an olive tone?"
"She looks gorgeous in anything," Bucky smirked from behind you, taking another pull of his coffee.
"What about that brown number?" You asked, ignoring the way his compliments made you feel like the only girl he's ever seen in the world.
"You have a very good eye, Mrs. Barnes," Valeria nodded. She asked her coworker to go find your size, taking you back into the dressing room. You narrowed down the options without changing again, not wanting anything black or dark since it was a wedding and not a funeral. Though, you knew Bucky would disagree.
You showed your boyfriend a pretty little green dress, but he shook his head. "I thought the black was nice," he told you.
"I'm not wearing black to a wedding," you laughed lightly. "It screams bad luck to me, don't you think?"
"Think it's more of a statement, sayin' the entire event is a sham and they shouldn't be doing this," Bucky snickered, the other attendant, Laura, returning with a pretty brown dress. "That satin?" He asked, rubbing the material when it was presented to you both.
"It's very fashionable now," Laura nodded, "and it's not too dark."
"Since when is it a rule to not wear dark colors to a wedding? I miss the memo?" Buck leaned back to his seat.
All three women offered him a small look, you chuckling under your breath before Valeria was leading you back into the changing room. "If I may, Mrs?" She spoke softly, "I've known Mr. Barnes for a number of years but he's never brought anyone into the store. Then, one day, he tells me he needs a new suit because the 'girl of his dreams' had agreed to a date, and every time since then?" She smiled softly at you, "He's sang your praises. I'm very honored you're trusting me with helping you today."
"Oh," you blinked in shock, giggling nervously, "well, thank you very much, Valeria, now I know why his suits are always top of the line." She waved you off, making you add, "And for the record, I'm not Mrs. Barnes, guess that'd be his mother, wouldn't it?"
"Oh," her eyes widened, gasping softly, "oh, I'm so sorry, I didn't know, I just - he talks so highly about you - "
"No, it's okay, it's okay," you rushed, patting her arm. "I actually kind of like it..."
She hummed, zipping you into another dress, "You know, he's the reason my girl and I are together."
"Really? How'd that happen?"
Valeria chuckled, "He's very bold, your man. We were getting coffee one day, discussing his wardrobe for a business trip he had in Hong Kong, when my lady walked in. I went all silly and stupid, and Mr. Barnes just," she shook her head with a fond smile, "brazenly asked her out for me, in front of the whole shop."
"Oh, Jesus, yeah - sounds like him."
"Well, luckily, it worked, else I don't think he would've come back for my assistance. I was so embarrassed, you have no idea, but my lady - Charlie - thought it was charming and cute. Mr. Barnes hasn't let me live it down since. Says he demands an invite to the wedding." She met your eyes through the mirror, offering, "And I'd be really happy to give him a plus one, hmm?"
"You're so sweet," you whispered, turning to survey the dress. You spent the better part of three hours there, trying on dress after dress, nitpicking almost everything as you just weren't sure what to wear. Bucky wasn't much help, he just approved everything.
So, it was up to Valeria and Laura to help you; bringing out iPads and design books, trying to piece something together that best fit your comfort and the vibe of the wedding. You didn't want to look like a walking money bag since your family wasn't by any means wealthy, thinking it would be a slap to their faces since your boyfriend could spend his money without ever thinking about it. You didn't want to give your family any reason to talk behind your back.
"I like the brown satin," Laura offered softly, looking you over in the mirror. "But the blue is just wow, it really looks like it was made for you, doesn't it?"
"Yes, but I think the green compliments her eyes more," Valeria cocked her head in thought. "Are you wearing your hair up or down?"
"Up," you answered, trying to mimic the look by pulling your locks off your shoulders, "with thin jewelry, I think."
"Diamonds?"
"Pearls, if I can find a dress that looks nice with it," you smiled, seeing Bucky's reflection in the mirror watching you with a soft smile on his face; head titled in thought before his phone chimed again and warranted his attention. "Maybe we could try the pink dress?" You looked to the two women for an opinion.
"No," Valeria shook her head, "it washes you out. And pink in winter? Oh, sweetie, I'd lose my job if I let you leave here with that. Guess that means you'll have to come back in the spring, right?"
You grinned in response as Laura chimed in, "The green's actually really nice, but the brown looks much better with your body type." Then she turned to Bucky, prompting, "Mr. Barnes? Final decision - which dress?"
Bucky paused, musing, "Lemme see them all again, get one last taste. It's between the green and brown numbers?"
"Or the blue," Valeria nodded. "C'mon, sweetie," she offered her hand to help you off the wee runway you were perched on in front of the magnificent mirrors.
"You look sensational in them all, doll, how the hell am I supposed to choose just one?" Bucky teased, his canines on display from the broad grin that stretched his lips.
"You'll find a way," you answered.
"Awh, telling me Mr. Big-Tough-Manly-Business-Man who makes impossible decisions everyday can't choose a simple piece of fashion?" Valeria tacked on.
"You guys can't pick either!" He laughed, "And you do a helluva lot more shopping than I do!"
Laura, Valeria, and you paused to exchange looks, you pointing at Bucky and relenting in a drawl, "Touché."
When you were escorted back into the dressing room, Laura waiting outside the door for your privacy with Valeria, Bucky sat back on the plush loveseat and extended his one arm over the back of the seating. He smirked to himself, shaking his head as if in disbelief - but he was. Bucky was in disbelief.
How did a rugged Mob boss find himself here? Watching his girl like a private fashion show?
His whole life, all he knew was turmoil, pain, drama, and fear. He knew he would inherit his father's well-built organization after he passed and knew what this life would entail; having no preconceived notions about a quiet life. He knew he would have to be tougher than tough, adaptable, intelligent, and confident in his role as the head of the 3-6 Brooklyn Mob. Knowing the idea of a family was farfetched, knowing he'd never know the simple pleasures in life, that he would constantly be on the move - in-able to form real, sentimental, emotional connections. He knew, in this life, he'd remain alone for everyone's best interest and safety, indulging in a series of flings and one-off relationships that couldn't haunt him.
Yet they did. These encounters reminded Bucky how alone, how stranded, how isolated, how different he was. Instead of satisfying an unquenchable thirst, these fleeting partners became heavy anchors to Bucky's reality and reminded him that there was no such thing as love - nor was there any room or logic.
And then... He met you. Bucky's lips silently spread in a grin as he remembered meeting you at a bakery; purchasing the last slice of coconut cream pie to your absolute chagrin. He thought you were gorgeous, something ethereal and unobtainable; authentic, raw, and unfiltered - things his one night stands could never measure up to. So, he offered you the slice of pie if it meant giving him your number as currency.
After that, it was impossible for Bucky to consider ever being alone again because you were the sun; center of the universe that drew everyone into your orbit. He was smitten, content, excited to date you, turned on by the fact you had no idea who he was - a rare occurrence in the city. You were pure as fresh snow; sweet, kind, affectionate, attentive, and borderline overly empathetic.
Bucky knew he was in love with you after only a few weeks when he had shown up at your apartment, dripping in blood. You didn't panic like he feared you would, just checked up and down the hallway before yanking him into your home. You cleaned him up, tending to wounds, offering a safe space for him to relax in; making mindless conversation to help distract him from the pain he endured.
And now? Now, Bucky was sat in Dior, giving his opinion on your wedding guest dress; wondering how he allowed himself to get to this point of being domestic. Bucky wasn't a man to give his opinion on dresses, what color nail polish you should use, to send fresh bouquets of flowers every other week. Yet here he was, sipping too-expensive coffee, deciding between brown, green, and blue dresses that he never would've batted an eye at.
However, that was just the domino effect you caused in his life. You were sweeter than apple pie, becoming Bucky's one tether to reality that saved him from losing himself in this dark, criminal mindset he adopted. You didn't know it, but you had transformed Bucky from a brooding asshole into a boyfriend; someone you were proud to claim and never hid from - never shied away from. He admired the way you came to terms with his job, knowing it was a hard pill to swallow and yet noting the way you just accepted him as he was.
Bucky realized in that moment that he adored this new aspect of life after thinking it was impossible to obtain. He adored sitting here, offering opinions on dresses, his security left outside instead of hovering over him like a brutal reminder he was seedy. He loved having you to come home to, he loved being part of your mundane world - a person who went to weddings, who drank Starbucks, who asked her boyfriend his opinion about how she looked in dresses. Who thought bouquets of flowers were romantic, who baked him homemade cakes for his birthday, who worked overtime in order to afford his Christmas or birthday presents, who walked to the takeout place instead of paying for delivery.
All that you are, Bucky adored deeply; falling in love with you each and every single day. All he wanted to do was protect you, share his life with you, even pick out outfits for weddings you would attend. He knew if any of the men in his organization knew the extent of his affection, they'd surely weaponize it against him... Or at the very least, tease him relentlessly. Yet he never cared, knowing you wanted to be loved out loud instead of hidden away in a storage closet; but did care if it meant his enemies could use you to get to him. It was a risk, an occupation hazard for loved ones to become targets, but that only made Bucky so much more protective of you.
Laura glanced at Bucky and saw the fond smile soften to let his teeth trap his bottom lip, smiling at the Mob boss looking soft, content, smitten being there. She knew most boyfriends would never put this much effort into helping their girlfriends in the fashion department, thinking he must've been truly in love to look so at-ease. Plus his enthusiasm through the entire ordeal assured her that Bucky was genuinely enjoying himself.
Once again, you slipped into the blue dress and showed Bucky. He hummed and snapped a photo, asking you to turn this way and that. Then you tried the green dress, him taking another photo, and finally, you changed into the brown satin dress, facing Bucky for his final verdict.
Bucky hummed in contemplation, swiping through the photos. "You know what?" He asked, looking at you with a grin. "You look delectable in everything, I can't decide - so, let's just get them all."
"Bucky, no - "
"We'll take all three, Valeria, please," Bucky interrupted you.
You waited until the attendants left you alone with a knowing look shot in your direction to ring up the desired purchases, hip cocking and hands to your hips. With an underlying exasperation, you questioned, "What the hell, Buck?"
He grinned and stood, again, buttoning his suit jacket, "C'mon, princess, this is fun, right? Being spoiled?." His arms wrapped around your waist, looking down at you as if you hung the very sun that sucked him into your orbit. "What's the point of all my money if I can't spend it on you? Huh?"
"You can save it for a rainy day?"
He shrugged, "Not necessary."
"Maybe pay to send some underprivileged kids to go to college?"
"Well, there's a thought," your boyfriend mused, "but I already do that through the Stark Foundation. I sponsor a few scholarships."
"Okay, well, buying all three still doesn't help me decide what to wear," you chuckled, you mimicked his action and wrapped your arms tightly around the base of his ribs. Due to his height, your head had to tip backwards to meet his eyes with a small smile.
You could look at this gorgeous man all day, everyday if God ever permitted such an act. Why wasn't dating a paid activity? You'd be the top earner with the way you were absolutely enthralled with all Bucky Barnes was. And what an honor it was to earn his mutual adoration.
"We'll figure it out at home. Gotta get you moving in the material to make an honest judgement," he offered softly. "But you look gorgeous in all of them, baby, seriously. Like, drop dead gorgeous that makes every girl brim with jealousy. Shit, doll, you're gonna run the risk of outshining the bride."
You sighed, "Look, Buck, I appreciate what you're doing, but three designer dresses? Where the hell am I ever gonna wear them? What kinda event calls for overpriced fashion statements?"
Buck eased with a soft expression, "Guess I'll just have to take you out so you can put them all to good use, huh?"
"That's not a solution!"
"Is to me," he let a hand drift to roughly palm the meat of your ass cheek over the brown satin; another symptom of him being whipped, his comfort over public displays of affection. "Seriously, doll, how the hell did I get so lucky?"
"Hmm?"
"Just look at you, my girl," he chuckled lightly, "radiant in anything you put on. It's almost unfair, makes me wonder what I did so right to have someone like you I can call my own. I can't wait to show you off in those dresses, just look so Goddamn tantalizing. I mean, damn, baby, I'm gonna have to fight off men with my gun and the jealous women with a stick."
"You do realize we're already dating, you don't have to lay it on so thick."
"And you do realize being with you makes me the luckiest bastard in the city, right? Least I can do is spoil you, I've already got everything else I've ever wanted."
Your heart swelled at his words, sighing gently as your chin rested on his chest to keep your head tilted. Softly, you admitted, "I don't think you're the lucky one, pretty sure the honor's mine. I couldn't ask for anything more in a man - in a partner. I'm so fucking in love with you, Bucky, it honestly doesn't make sense."
He nodded, asking, "Know what else doesn't make sense?"
"What's that?"
"You refusing those dresses, I mean, c'mon!" He laughed, you groaning and releasing your hold; making his tighten to prevent you from escaping. "Those dresses look phenomenal on you, you really gonna reject my gift? C'mon, you know the rules, doll, if you adore her, you Dior her." You were ready to retort, but Bucky smiled, "For the record, I think you should wear the blue dress to the wedding."
"Blue it is," you smiled, lifting onto your toes and hooking a hand around the back of his neck to meet his lips in a scratchy kiss. "Thank you so much, baby," you whispered, feeling his lips spread against yours before he brought you back in for a much-more passionate kiss. "Hm!" You hummed, pulling away to scold, "But no more, all right? You spend too much money on me - I mean, who the hell needs three designer dresses?"
"You do," he whispered, "you deserve all of this, sugar, and I'll do what I can t'spoil you the way you should be. Might as well get used to it, I got no plans on stopping."
Your eyes rolled in good faith, excusing yourself, "Yeah, yeah, all right. Lemme get changed and we can - "
"Nah," he shook his head, petting the skin of your back exposed from the brown satin dress with his fingertips, "know what? Stay in the dress, I wanna take you out and show you off."
Your lips found his in a breath-sucking kiss, trying to convey your appreciation and giddiness over never having been spoiled like this in your entire life - feeling grateful, refreshed, and privileged for a man like Bucky in your life. Whatever greater force there was in this world, you thanked repeatedly for choosing you to love this man and for this man to love you. There was no telling what you did to deserve him, but blessed be those heavenly powers.
requesting rules and masterlist
MCU masterlist
#bucky barnes#mob!bucky#mob!bucky barnes#mafia!bucky#mafia!bucky barnes#mob bucky#mob bucky barnes#mafia bucky#mafia bucky barnes#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x female!reader#bucky barnes x f!reader#bucky barnes x fem!reader#bucky barnes x female reader#bucky barnes x fem reader#mafia bucky barnes x reader#mafia bucky barnes x female!reader#mafia bucky barnes x f!reader#mafia bucky barnes x fem!reader#mafia au#bucky mafia au#mafia bucky au#mafia bucky x female!reader#mafia bucky x reader#mafia bucky x you#mafia bucky x y/n#mob bucky au#mob bucky x reader#mob bucky x you#mob bucky x y/n
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Collateral Damage (1)
Summary: He only wanted some coffee.
Pairing: Mobster!Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader
Warnings: secret admirer, kinda love-struck Bucky, shooting, violence, blood, getting shot
Collateral Damage masterlist
Bucky hates it when things go wrong. He just hates it. Especially when he didnât expect things to go awry.
On any other day, heâd expect things to turn out for the worst. Just not today. Today, of all days, shit had to hit the fan.
All he wanted was a coffee at his favorite café and a slice of the pie the owner bakes every Friday.
If heâs honest, Bucky would admit that he comes to the little bakery every Friday afternoon to see the woman he spotted some months ago.
Sheâs there every Friday after work to order tea, chamomile, and a cupcake. Sometimes sheâs adventurous and takes a cinnamon roll.
Bucky chuckled when he heard her talk to the barista, telling her she wanted to be wild that day. He couldnât help but smile at her innocent guilty pleasure. She was so unlike the people in his life. Sweet and kind.
Today, he wanted to talk to her. Today, he planned on introducing himself to the sweet woman stealing his heart bit by bit over the last few months.
Fate had different plans...
One hour earlier.
Bucky is in a good mood. No, heâs having one of the best days of his life. Business is good. Heâs on top of the food chain, and he will finally talk to the woman heâs going to make his queen one day. â One step after another.
He opens the door to the little café he found when he was aimlessly roaming the streets of New York. Bucky only wanted to blow off some steam and sort his thoughts but ended up at the little café with coffee and pie. Finding so much more.
Bucky smiles as the little bell above the door rings. It feels like coming home every time he enters this place.
The owner greets him whenever Bucky is around, and the barista knows his favorite order. A risk, Buckyâs best friend Steve would say. Escapism from his life, Bucky would say.
Sheâs already there, engrossed in yet another book. This time, itâs a dark romance novel about a mafia boss and a shy librarian. Bucky knows because he googled the name to find out as much as possible about the books she loves to read.
âHello,â the owner waves at Bucky, smiling as she passes him by. âFrankie will get you the usual.â
âThank you,â Bucky nods before looking for a table closer to her. Itâs the first time heâll sit close to her, not at his favorite table, to watch her from afar.
âAll for our favorite regular,â she says, walking away to check on the pies in the back of the cafĂ©.
Bucky smiles. A soft smile, a genuine one. This place holds magic he canât explain. Itâs the calm in his life. Haven. An escape.
âCoffee and cherry pie coming your way,â the waitress says, balancing a tray in one hand.
Bucky frowns. Heâs not a fan of changes. The new face walking toward his table, chirping and smiling as she struggles to not drop the tray, brings tension back into these fleeting, peaceful moments he spent at the cafĂ©.
His instinct kicks in seconds before the waitress drops the tray to point her gun at him. Bucky takes her out with one precise shot, a bullet to her forehead.
People start to scream, and chaos breaks out. Most of the customers ran out of the café, along with the owner.
âI wonât miss,â the barista he chatted with so many times says. They jump over the counter, gun aimed at Bucky. âYour time has come.â
Bucky huffs. Heâs about to shoot his attacker when a book hits the baristaâs head. Itâs almost hilarious. If not for the gun pointing in his direction, Bucky would laugh.
âBitch,â the barista turns their attention toward you, their attacker. You gasp and drop to the ground, crawling under the table as they shoot in your direction.
Bucky reacts in a split second. He tackles the barista to the ground, taking them out with one hard punch to the chin. âBastard, Iâll get to you later.â
He gets back up to look for her, his savior, and the sweet woman who enchanted him. Bucky gasps, watching you hunch over, blood soaking your pretty sundress.
âDoll, no,â he crouches beside you to cradle you in his arms. Bucky presses his hand to the wound on your arm, sighing because itâs not a deadly wound. âIâm so sorry. This shouldnât have happened.â
âI,â you carefully touch his hand. âThat wasnât how I expected to finally get to know your name âŠâ
#Collateral Damage#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#x reader#mafia au#mobster!bucky barnes#mobster!bucky barnes x reader
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No one as sweet as you - Mafia!Stucky/Reader



⊠Pairing: Stucky/Reader ⊠Word count: ~9,4k ⊠Rating: Explicit ⊠Warnings: Mafia AU, best friends to lovers, hurt/comfort, angst, fluff, protective!stucky, TW: reader is verbally and physically abused by john walker, idiots in love, sharing a bed, poly relationship, piv sex, dirty talk, cunnilingus, praise kink, pet names (Sweets), unprotected sex, creampie. ⊠Summary: When youâre hurt by your boyfriend you go to the two people you can depend on for anything, Steve and Bucky, your best friends. ⊠Note: This is a fic that was previously posted on AO3, at the beginning of the year. But since I'm stuck in writer's block right now I thought I would post this in case you haven't read it. It's one of my favorites. There are some short prequel fics to this also posted on AO3, about when they were living together in college. I'll post those too in the following weeks.
Series masterlist
Masterlist | AO3
The bouncer gives you one glance before he opens the door for you and the line of people you pass shout angrily but you donât even spare them a glance, your thoughts elsewhere. The music in the club usually invigorates you but tonight it passes through without leaving a trace.
Making your way to Monica at the bar, the people you pass shoot you weird glances and you know you must look a mess. When she sees you she comes right over, the music is too loud to talk so you share a squeeze of the forearm in place of a hug before she pours you your favorite wine, with a pitying smile at your smeared mascara. You throw a kiss at her before making your way to the back and once again the big man at the door opens it for you after a quick look.
The music is muted as you make your way to the stairs at the back that take you up to their private room. When your heels land at the top and you meet Bucky's eyes he lifts the girl currently on his lap off and declares "Everyone out."
Steve shoots him an irritated look before his eyes follow Bucky's and sees you. You stand perfectly still while the women and men who were enjoying a private party with two of the biggest mobsters in New York mill past you down the stairs, some even shoot you dirty looks.
When the last person has passed, you take a step towards them, but before you're two steps in, Bucky has taken the glass from your hand and Steve has lifted you into his arms. You cling to him, hands grasping his shirts, and finally, you know youâre safe.
Steve sits down with you in his lap, cradling your head to lean it against him, the other arm holding you tight at your waist. Bucky's palms are gentle when he rubs your back soothingly. None of them say anything at first but the tears running down your face speak for themselves. You made it all the way without breaking down but with them, you can be vulnerable. For the last seven years, theyâve been the rock, the shelter, and your haven.
"Talk to us, Sweets," Bucky's voice is only that soft with you, maybe sometimes with Steve too, âWhatâs going on?â You try to take a deep breath, but it just stutters. After a few more tries itâs better but youâre not sure where to begin. They give you time, and don't press you on information, like they otherwise do in their line of work.
Finally, you release Steve's shirt and instead, you find the hand he has wrapped around your waist, twisting the rings on his fingers as you try to speak. You don't want to look at them, the shame and the anxiety is running high in your body but you want to tell them, you just have to find the right words.
"You know the guy I've been seeing," you start and feel Steve's arms tighten around you. Before you can say more Bucky mutters "I'm gonna kill him." Steve is calmer and asks, "What about John, Sweets?" He speaks into your hair, his voice is gentle but it has a hard edge. "He's been so sweet since we started going out, but he's been having a rough time at work lately," you squeeze your eyes shut, not wanting to remember, your heart beating like crazy. The memories bring forth the panic and the fear again and your breath gets shallow.
"It's alright Sweets, you're here with us, nothing can hurt you," Bucky's low voice is comforting, together with their touch, and you know heâs telling you the truth. Itâs the reason you came here instead of going home.
You take a few more breaths and continue "So I thought I'd do something nice for him. We had a spa day and while he soaked in the tub I made dinner and dressed up for him." Frowning hard, your fingers spin the rings on Steve's hand faster and faster the more your anxiety builds, knowing whatâs coming.
"And everything was great until I poured the wine and spilled some on the tablecloth." Your mouth opens and closes a few times and the tears start to fall again but Bucky is there with his thumbs, cradling your face and brushing them away, while Steve rocks you gently in his embrace.
"He was furious," you cry. "Said I ruined everything! He threw the wine in my face, then the bottle across the room. He tried to grab me but I ran out of there." There is a long silence when you finish, itâs just your sobs and the music from the other side of the wall. Then Steve says "I'm gonna fucking kill him," his voice laced with rage, and he hugs you even closer.
"I took a cab here, I didnât know where else to go, I didnât wanna go home." With the last words out you feel a small relief. Youâve told them. Youâve told someone. The scene still plays in your head, seeing John's eyes turn black with rage when the drops of rosĂ© landed on the white linen, feeling the fear when he started screaming.
"Thank you for telling us, Sweets. Youâre an incredible person," Steve says and moves you out of his lap and over to Bucky's. They treat you with the utmost care, moving slowly, giving you time to protest if you want, or detangle yourself if that's what you desire. But you let them manipulate your body how they like because sometimes they know what you need more than you do.
"You did nothing wrong," he goes on to say, holding onto your hands, letting his thumbs caress the skin. "John is an absolute fucking asshole and no one should be treated like that.â You meet his green-blue eyes that are only soft for you, and Bucky. Right now, Steve isnât the feared mobster that people avert their eyes from when he enters a room, scared theyâre going to end up in a ditch because they looked at him wrong. No, this Steve is your best friend.
"I don't want to be scared, and I don't want to go home in case he comes there," you confess. "You'll stay with us," Bucky decides, voice finite. "Letâs go home so you can take a shower and change clothes." You nod and are about to stand up but Bucky is quicker, changing his grip and holding you close as he gets up. He carries you to the car and doesn't let go of you until you're in their mansion, in the room you have there.
When he puts you down your feet are a little unsteady and they both look at you with concern, but you give them a weak smile âItâs okay.â "We'll be right outside, shout if you need anything," Steve tells you and when you nod they both step out and close the door softly behind them.
For a moment you stand still, trying to make sense of the last hours, wondering how everything went to shit. Then you finally get a good look at yourself in the tall mirror and see the black rivulets of mascara and eyeliner smudged down your cheeks, the foundation almost gone.
The dress is ruined by the wine and even if it was expensive and you can get it dry cleaned you donât want it anymore. You pull it off and throw it into the trash can, quickly followed by the heels. The lingerie is one of your favorite sets but you're unsure if you will ever be able to enjoy it again without remembering how you chose it especially for John. After a moment it goes into the trash, and the earrings too, feeling like you need everything from the night to be gone.
The only thing you keep on your body is the necklace that was a gift from Bucky and Steve years ago and you havenât taken it off since. It's custom-made with three delicate chains in gold, silver, and black twisted together. You loved it the moment you saw it, knowing that the chains were the three of you, twisted together through the rest of your lives. When you touch it with your fingers it makes you feel better, because you can feel them with you.
The shower feels more than just bodily cleansing and when you remove the last pieces of your smeared makeup, smoothing eye cream over your puffy eyes, the feeling of fear and panic is distant.
In the closet are a bunch of your clothes, probably more than you like to admit, but the best part is the drawer with their old t-shirts. You pull one out, not sure which of them it used to belong to, but itâs worn and soft against your skin. For a moment you press it against your nose, breathing in the detergent that reminds you of this place and all the wonderful memories that you have with them, before you find your pajama pants.
Out in your room you sit on the bed and look around at the muted colors. Bucky and Steve insisted that the room was yours, not just a guest room, and it makes you smile a little when you think about how much fun you had decorating it.
After taking a deep breath you open the door and find them just a few steps away. The look in Bucky's eyes is murderous and Steve's fists are clenched by his side, but when they turn to you they go back to being your best friends that you met in college all those years ago. "How are you feeling?" Bucky steps up to you and pulls you into a soft hug, tucking your head underneath his chin as you wrap your arms around his waist, breathing in the smell of him. Steve comes up behind you, placing his palms on your shoulders, rubbing the muscles carefully. "Better now," you answer. "But I never had dinner so I'm a bit hungry."
Bucky pulls away from you, cradling your face, tilting it up until you're looking right into his light blue eyes. "Let's go raid the kitchen," he smiles and holds your gaze for a few seconds more and there is so much love in those eyes it's almost scary. You know he would burn down the city if it made you happy, they both would, and that intensity is one of the many things that have kept you from finding out what it would be like to be theirs. You're not sure you'd be able to handle it.
When Bucky lets go of you, Steve's arm goes around your waist and he pulls you into him, Bucky takes your hand, lacing your fingers together, and you walk to the kitchen. You sit down at the kitchen island while they open the fridge.
"The chef made mac'nâcheese," Steve says and pulls out an oven pan, covered in tin foil with a post-it note on top with instructions for heating it. Bucky turns on the oven and says, "Want something to drink Sweets?"
"Soda?" you ask and Steve pulls a can out of the fridge before settling down beside you, handing it to you. You hand it right back "Please? I don't wanna fuck up my nails." That makes him chuckle as he opens it and the sound makes you warm on the inside so you lean your head against his shoulder.
"Thank you," you sigh. "For always being here for me. I'm sorry I ruined your party." "You didn't ruin shit," Bucky spits out, glaring at you from where he is standing by the oven. Steve and you chuckle at his harsh tone but then he leans forward, over the counter towards you, resting his large arms against the surface.
"I mean it, Sweets, don't you ever think you ruin anything by showing up, for any reason," his voice is stern but you know it comes from a place of love. "Thank you, Bucky, it means a lot," you smile.
When the oven is warm Bucky puts the tray in and pulls out plates. It only takes a few minutes and your tummy rumbles as the kitchen fills with the smell of cheese. Bucky and Steve make small talk about work things and you're grateful for them filling the silence while you finally get some food.
But it isn't the nice chicken that you cooked for John that you looked forward to eating and your eyes begin to burn. Even though you try to force the tears back they come anyway and run down your cheeks as you eat. Neither Bucky nor Steve notice until you reach for a paper towel and sniffle loudly. Not a second later you're wrapped up in Steve's embrace, crying into his shirt again while Bucky caresses your hair and nape. They mumble sweet things to you and tell you that you're safe and that nothing is ever going to hurt you again.
After a few minutes, the tears run dry. "I'm okay," you say and Steve loosens his hold, his eyes filled with concern for you. "You sure?" "Yeah, but I feel like I've been hit by a truck. Should probably try to get some sleep.â "We're sleeping in my room," Bucky decides and you nod, Steve too.
It's not unusual for the three of you to share a bed when one of you has had a rough time. The first time it happened was after finals and you all fell asleep in Steve's bed, totally exhausted, and slept better than you'd had in weeks.
Then it was after break-ups, yours, Steve's, Bucky's, somehow you all ended up in a bed together every time and it wasn't sexual at any point, just friends being there for each other and it continued through the years. The only time it was out of the question was when one of you was in a relationship, then it just felt weird, and from previous experience, it wasn't something that partners were all that accepting of.
You retrieve your pillows and cover from your room before settling in Buckyâs huge bed, your feet twisted up with Steve's, and Bucky is holding your hand. It's nice, it's familiar and you drift off knowing you're safe with them.
The room is dark when their soft voices wake you, but that might be because of the black-out curtains and not because it's still night. Theyâve moved close enough to you that you can feel the warmth from their bodies on either side of you, and Buckyâs chest is right in front of your eyes when you open them slightly to peek. They don't notice you're awake and you don't feel like announcing it either, curious what theyâre talking about.
"We let her decide." Even if Steve's tone is hushed it's still hard. "She is too sweet, you know she would never hurt a fly, she's going to say no," Bucky protests harshly in a whisper. This is interesting, you think.
"Even if you and I are fine with getting blood on our hands, maybe she doesn't want to live with that, maybe she wants to press charges." Steve has always been the more level-headed of the two, good with looking at things from all angles and keeping his cool. Bucky huffs and you want to giggle. His emotions always get him in trouble, even if he doesnât want to admit it. When Bucky is angry he sees red and when he loves he does it with his whole soul and being. One time you asked Steve how he isnât dead yet since his poker face seems to suck, but Steve explained that when theyâre doing business he is usually calm and collected. When his emotions finally break through, people know they should probably run.
"Fine.â You can tell Bucky is not happy but he lowers his voice even more, and now itâs tinged with something else. âBut I'm never letting her go again." His words together with his gentle tone make your heart skip. There was a time when you seriously thought about asking them to see if the three of you could work it out, and be more than just friends. But what you have with them is so precious that if it fails in the end, and you lose your best friends, you're not sure how you're going to go on.
"And you think I will?" Steve mutters. "We should have said something a long time ago." "Well, we can't go back in time. All I know is that I love her and I can't see her with anyone else ever again," Bucky's voice sounds like it's going to crack. He never cries but that is as close as it gets.
Steve reaches over you towards him, you can't see what he does but you know how Steve's comforting hands look on Bucky, you've seen it before. Sometimes they're even sweeter with each other than they are with you, when they think no one can see them, not even you. It's so clear that they love each other deeply, honestly it's surprising that they don't just date each other.
You hear Bucky hum in contentment and Steve gives a small soft laugh. It feels like a good time as any to pretend to wake up. You file away their words for another day, not ready to deal with them now in the wake of whatâs happened. First, you need to heal the broken heart you're already nursing before thinking about giving it away again.
With a groan you turn from your side to your back, stretching and blinking your eyes open. They're lying on their sides, both resting their heads on their hands. "What time is it?" you mumble, rubbing your eyes. "Just past nine," Bucky informs you and brushes a few strands of hair out of your face. "And you two are still here?" "Just for you," Steve says softly and finds your hand, twisting your fingers together.
Both of them are early risers and you hate mornings, something they tease you for endlessly. "Honestly though, have you already, like, gone for a run, had breakfast, and then sealed some important deal?" "Nope." Bucky slides his arm in under your neck, placing the other hand on your hip, and pulls you closer to him. "We didn't want to leave in case you woke up." Steve shuffles closer, his chest pressing into your shoulder. "Didn't want you to think we left you all by yourself."
You hum and decide to ask "Would it be okay if I stay here a few days?" "Sweets, stay as long as you want. It's your home as much as ours,â Steve answers. "No,â you correct. âMy name is definitely not on any papers for this house." "We can fix that if that's what you want. Just move here." Bucky is serious but you decide to laugh it off. "You'd like that wouldn't you?" "Like old times." he smiles.
"Except I have no desire to listen to the people you bring home scream and moan, got enough of that in college,â tumbles out of your mouth without really thinking of it. They exchange a look but before they can say anything you hastily continue. "Do you think I need to break up with John, or do you think he got the message when I left?"
An uneasy silence falls and Bucky breaks it. "I'm gonna be honest with you Sweets, I really wanna fucking kill him, and make it as painful and as horrifying for him as possible. Death will feel like a blessing in the end." Steve speaks next. "But it's your decision, and if you wanna press charges against him, we'll make our lawyers available."
Itâs a lot to take in at that moment. "I don't know,â you answer truthfully. âIt still hurts, I'm still scared but I'm not sure what will make it better." "When you've decided you let us know and we'll do whatever you want." Steve bends down to kiss the top of your head.
"If I see him on the street or something though I'm gonna punch him," Bucky says casually before letting go of you and getting out of bed. When his warmth leaves you, you whine and that makes him chuckle. He kneels on the bed and kisses your forehead. "Steve will keep you company while I make breakfast." "You mean go get what the chef has already prepared?" you joke. Bucky shoots you a look before leaving the bedroom.
"We should be glad he isn't actually cooking. Remember when he tried to make pancakes for his girlfriend and almost burned down the apartment," Steve notes. "That's because he got distracted. I mean, I'm glad I came out of my room when I did but the image of Bucky and her on the kitchen table still haunts me," you chuckle.
"You weren't exactly innocent back in those days either," Steve points out with a laugh. "But I never did it on the communal surfaces," you defend with a huff. "No, all we got was listening to you trying to stifle every sound and failing miserably." "Well, at least I didn't break a wall while fucking someone." "It was a shitty wall, never have that problem here." "See that's why I don't wanna move here." "We can soundproof your room?" "Or I can just live in my apartment?"
Bucky comes back with a breakfast tray and places it on the bedside table before pulling out your phone from his pants. "It's been buzzing nonstop since I got down," he explains and hands it to you right as the screen lights up with an incoming call.
"It's John," you tell them, and your chest floods with anxiety as you stare at the screen and sit up against the headboard. "Answer it," Steve sits up beside you, his shoulder brushing yours. Bucky is pressed against you much the same on your other side. "On speaker," he instructs and takes out his own phone to record the call.
Your hands shake as you swipe to answer. "H-hello." Your voice is wavering. "Baby! I'm sorry for yesterday, I'm sorry I got mad. I've been calling since you left, I've been so worried. I checked your place but you weren't home. Where are you?" John says in a worried voice. "I'm at a friend's house," you reply.
The feelings in your chest are conflicted, on one hand you never want to see him again but hearing his voice makes you remember that when he is good he is great, amazing even, and you would be lying if you said you didn't miss him. For the last few months, you gave it your all and you were even prepared to tell him you love him.
"I'll come and pick you up and let me apologize properly," he sounds pained like he is actually sorry for what he did. Fuck, it's so tempting to go back but you know better. You know that this is just the tip of the iceberg, and getting wine thrown in your face is probably not the worst that can happen.
"No, John." You try to sound confident but you're not sure it comes across. "I don't think it's going to work out between us." The moment you say the words the tears well up and Steve starts rubbing your shoulder." You're doing great," he whispers right by your ear so John doesn't hear.
"Are you-" John sounds shocked. "Are you breaking up with me⊠over the phone?" "Yeah, sorry." You cringe, you shouldn't be sorry. "You scared me yesterday and I feel like I don't know you anymore."
"Babe you don't need to be scared of me, I would never hurt you I swear," he sounds like he is about to cry and a part of you wants to comfort him. "You threw wine in my face and said some really mean things," you point out.
"I didn't mean any of that, I promise. You know I've had a lot on my plate lately and I didn't mean to take it out on you." There is some part of you that desperately wants to believe him. "That's not an excuse," you go on. "I'm not an object for you to take out your frustration on. It's not going to work John."
There is a long silence before he speaks again and now his voice is laced with rage instead. "Then you can come get your fucking things right now." "John, please don't-" you start but he cuts you off.
"You fucking bitch, you lead me on for months and then you break up with me over the phone, because what? You think Iâm gonna hit you or something?" "Yeah, maybe," you answer truthfully. "You're such a dumb bitch, I would never lay a hand on a woman I care about."
Both Steve and Bucky stir beside you. When you shoot them a glance they are both staring at the screen with murder in their eyes. "Calling me names won't change my mind, John," it hurts when he says them, like an actual stab in the heart and it brings out more tears.
Bucky leans over and taps the mute button. "There is no way you're going over there, we'll send Sam and Vis." You nod and unmute while John is raging on about how dumb and useless you are and how he wishes he'd never wasted his time on you. "I'm going to send some friends to pick up my things."
"Oh, so you won't even face me yourself?â his voice is unrecognizable now. âYou know what? I'm glad for what I did, I'm not sorry anymore, you're obviously a fucking coward and not worth a second of my time." Every ounce of fight is gone from you, you're just tired and want it to be over. You donât want to listen to the hurtful words anymore so you simply say "Goodbye John," and don't even wait for a response before hanging up. You drop the phone into the sheets and bury your face in your hands, your body jerking with sobs.
Steve and Buckyâs arms go around you but you hardly notice, everything is just excruciating pain, your heart smashed into a million pieces. Twenty-four hours ago you were happy with a man you thought you knew, and loved, but now everything is broken and you're not sure what youâre going to do next.
It takes a long time for you to stop crying and when it finally ends you're exhausted, again. The coffee Bucky brought has gone cold but Steve holds a glass of juice to your lips and makes you take a few sips before coaxing some yogurt into your mouth. "Steve is going to stay with you while I take care of a few things. If you need me, you tell him and I'll be right back," Bucky promises when he leaves the bed again, taking the tray with him out of the bedroom.
"Is he going to kill him?" you ask softly as you sink down under the covers. Steve puts his arm around your waist and pulls you into his chest until your face is squished against it. "No," his voice is soft. "Not without me." "SteveâŠ" "Can you blame us, Sweets? John was lucky it was over the phone or else we would have beaten him into a pulp for saying those things."
"He never acted like that before," you whisper. "I'm just happy you got out before he put his hands on you," Steve whispers back. "If you had shown up with bruises yesterday I might have lost it." "I love you," you tell him and he kisses the top of your head. "I love you too, Sweets, and I know Bucky feels just the same." You hum and let the exhaustion take over.
They have switched when you wake the next time, you're in Bucky's arms and he is carding his fingers through your hair speaking quietly to you. "Wake up Sweets, it's time for dinner."
Even if youâve slept right through lunch you shake your head and swing your leg over his hip, clinging to him. "Don't wanna get up," you whine. "If you eat dinner, we can watch a movie on the couch afterward." He knows just how to tempt you and you need something to try and take your mind off everything.
"Candy?" you pull back. Even if the light in the room is dim you can still see the blue in his eyes, and the crinkles at the corners when he smiles. "You know we keep stock of everything you like, there is always something sweet for our Sweets."
You hug him hard. "I love you Bucky, you know that right?" "I love you too, Sweets." He kisses the top of your head, much like Steve did earlier. "And I know Steve feels just the same." That makes you giggle "Steve said the same thing." "Well he is a smart man," he shrugs.
Bucky all but pulls you out of bed but he doesn't force you to change out of your pajamas. He leads you to the kitchen where Steve is plating the food and your stomach grumbles when you smell it. They have set the table with candles and it looks lovely but it also reminds you of your last candle-lit dinner. Bucky sees the look on your face turns you away from it and tilts your chin up with his fingertips, "ItâsâŠâ he begins, hesitating, trying to find the right words. âWe want to replace every bad memory, but if itâs too much too soon weâll throw it all out.â
The scary thing is that he is serious. If you said the word they would throw everything out, but you don't want that, you want a nice dinner with them and try to get past what happened. Maybe it will help, maybe it wonât but you wonât know until youâve tried. And if there is one thing you know for sure, it is that you are safe with them.
âItâs fine, Iâll try,â you promise with a smile before turning around to sit down at the table. Steve serves the food and Bucky pours you a glass of wine. After a few bites, Bucky brings up some stupid shit the three of you did a long time ago and through dinner, you reminisce about old times.
Since meeting John you haven't seen them as much because you learned early on that partners were weirded out or even jealous of what you had with them. Right now you canât fathom why you would ever do that, because these two people are the best thing in your life.
You fold your napkin into your lap and look at them. "I'm sorry for, like, ghosting you the last few months," you swallow hard. "I've been a shitty friend but you always take care of me when I need you, and Iâm so thankful for that. I promise Iâll do better."
"It's okay sweets," Steve smiles and reaches over the table to grasp your hand. Bucky takes the other and his thumb caresses your knuckles. "Don't apologize, there is no need." The lump in your throat is from love and not from sadness this time and you don't try to speak, just nod, squeezing their hands back.
Afterward, you cuddle up on the couch to watch a movie but ten minutes in you're already nodding off. When Steve and Bucky notice you're asleep they turn the TV off and Steve carries you up to Bucky's bedroom. "She has work tomorrow," Bucky whispers and pulls the cover up over your body. "Fuck, should we wake her?" Steve asks back. "No, let her sleep, she starts at nine so if we let her sleep til seven it should be fine."
Fortunately, the alarm on your phone goes off as usual but when you turn to snooze it, you instead roll into a warm chest. Steve grumbles and reaches for your phone, handing it to you before seizing you around the waist, and burying his face in your neck.
âHey, I have to get up,â you mutter. It feels like your eyes are filled with sand and your head is pounding but you have to go to work nonetheless. âYou donât have to work,â he speaks into your skin and it makes a tingling feeling travel through you.
âDonât be silly, let go of me,â you chuckle and detangle yourself. The other side of the bed is empty, Bucky already up. You drag yourself over to your room to shower before getting ready and eating breakfast. Steve insists on driving you to work and Bucky comes and sees you off with a long hug and a kiss on your hair. âIâve put Clint and Peter to watch your apartment and Sam and Vis are going to be outside your work all day, Sweets.â âThank you, Bucky.â
When Steve drops you off he points out the car. "If you see John or you for any other reason feel unsafe you can go to them right away, or call us,â he tucks a strand of hair in behind your ear. âDonât hesitate. You mean everything to us and we want to keep you safe, Sweets,â You nod. âThank you, Steve,â you whisper, leaning over the console to kiss his cheek before heading to work.
What you told yourself would only be a few days, turns into a few weeks and now itâs almost two months. Despite your initial refusal, youâre enjoying living with them again. A few times after the break-up, John tried to contact you and every time the phone started buzzing and your anxiety spiked you found one of them and they helped you through it.
You havenât slept in your room once and neither has Steve, it's always the three of you sleeping in Bucky's bed. It could be because Bucky has an expensive bed that you sleep so soundly, but in the back of your head, you know itâs because their presence calms you.
If Bucky or Steve can't drive you to work, someone else does, your own car is still parked on the street by your apartment and you donât have any desire to go get it. But you do miss some of your clothes, and toiletries, so maybe you should take it as a sign that you need to go back.
After getting home from work that day you walk up to their office, a little apprehensive. Both of them are leaning over the desk when you poke your head in, their cuffs rolled up, exposing their underarms. Itâs enough to make your stomach flip, they look too good. Steve sees you first and a smile splits his face. âHey Sweets, have a good day at work?â
Bucky turns and opens his arms towards you when you step into the room. His hug is warm and comforting and you answer Steveâs question with a yes, before taking a step back from them. "I know I said I was only going to stay a few days but it's been way more than that now, so I think I'll go back to my place after work tomorrow." You try to sound as neutral as possible, neither sad nor happy, just stating a fact.
"No," Bucky breathes, fists tightening at his sides. "I agree with Bucky, don't leave," Steve's voice is calm and his face doesnât give much away but his eyes are betraying him, theyâre too glossy, too wide, and too filled with fear to miss.
The other reason you need to go back home is the way they are treating you and touching you. Itâs making your feelings run wild and you can't have that, you canât risk losing them too. And if that wasn't enough they've invaded your dreams with their touches and words, making you wake up aching for them in a way that is totally inappropriate.
"I can't stay, you know that," you sigh. "No, I don't." Bucky is frustrated, staring at you. "I really fucking don't know why you can't stay. We love having you here and you seem to love being here. Just stay."
His mood is making you defensive, you don't want to explain that you're obviously catching feelings soon after getting out of something traumatic. You need to think, and every time you wake up drenched, tucked in between them you are seconds away from ruining everything by confessing or honestly just taking one of their hands and pushing it in between your legs, hoping they will help you get off.
"I need my own space, Bucky," you cross your arms and glare at him. "You have your own room," he states and takes a step closer. "That I don't use anyway," you reply and take a step back. "Because you don't want to!" His raised voice silences you not because you're scared but because he's right. Bucky isnât stupid and he's not the type to sugarcoat things when he's upset.
Your heart is hammering. "No I don't want to," you confess with a breath. "But I need to." Then you turn to go but only get a step from the desk before Steve grabs your wrist. He spins you into his chest, Bucky coming up behind you, boxing you in between them. Bucky's head falls on your shoulder. "I can't let you go again, Sweets, I can't do it."
Your mind flashes back to the morning when you pretended to sleep and heard them talking. The breath in your chest hitches as you look up into Steve's blue-green eyes. âIâm with him, Sweets,â he says in a low voice and cups your cheek with his large hand. âYou belong here, with us.â
Your mouth opens and you try to protest but it dies on your tongue and Steve takes the opportunity to continue. "We love you, more than anything, we want you to be ours, more than just our best friend. Live with us, be with us in every sense of the word. All three of us, together," his voice wavers at the end.
The words sink in slowly. Be with them. Be theirs. Stay. Your body is aching to say yes and your heart is about to beat its way out of your chest. âButâŠâ âAll I know is that I feel incomplete without you, like a part of my soul is somewhere else, and the only time I'm at peace is when I'm with you two. I can't keep living like a part of me is missing. So I'm asking you, please stay, please help us figure this out and be with us." Buckyâs arms wrap around your waist. "Every time I see you with someone else my heart gets ripped out of my chest and I've tried to be with other people, we both have, but in the end, theyâre not you."
Their confessions break down your defenses as their words ring true. In all your relationships over the years, there's always been something missing but you've never been able to figure out what. There's been passion and there's been love but it's always lacking something and now you think you get it. It has lacked them and the deep connection you share through years and years of friendship. Feeling stupid about wanting to leave and thinking you werenât ready to be with them makes tears well in your eyes. Whatever it is you three can figure it out, it may not be traditional but it beats being unhappy.
"Don't cry, Sweets." Steve runs his thumb over your cheek. You lean your head into his chest, nodding against it. "I'll stay," you sniffle. The arms around your waist tighten and Bucky speaks into your shoulder. "Really Sweets?" he sounds like heâs worried that maybe you're joking.
"Really Bucky," you promise, wrapping your arms around Steve and hugging him close. For a moment itâs just the three of you enveloped in your shared love but then Bucky rights himself and you look up at him over your shoulder, matching his silly smile.
He leans in like he is about to kiss you but he stops himself, his eyes searching yours for something, and it's scary. If you take the plunge everything will change, or maybe it won't, but it feels like an earthquake is rolling through your life, upsetting everything and if you let him kiss you it will be real. But that's what you want.
"Please?" you ask him and his whole face lights up before he closes the distance and presses his lips to yours. It could be described as fireworks, an erupting volcano, or maybe feeling the first rays of sunlight on your skin after years in darkness, but nothing will come close to the feeling of being kissed by Bucky.
It's a chaste kiss with just his lips moving carefully against yours. It's over quicker than you want but in his place is Steve, turning your head back towards him and descending on you. His fingers run through your hair and he opens your mouth to let his tongue play with yours, the feeling once again indescribable, it's just the feeling of right. Everything about it feels right.
Even if the kiss is slow when he pulls back your breathing is labored and you're clutching his shirt. "I-" you begin but canât find any words. That kiss ignited something inside you, it's like you're seeing color for the first time, everything is clearer and sharper. What even was your life before?
"Are doing okay Sweets?" Bucky asks next to your ear and you nod in response. When his soft lips caress the side of your neck you whimper and lean your head to give him better access, he chuckles against your skin, nipping it and making you gasp. "I wanna eat you up, find out what you taste like everywhere."
Itâs a badly kept secret that Bucky has a marking kink. Youâve seen his exes, you know he's possessive and likes to leave marks. You can't wait to have them on you so you whisper, "Mark me.â
Steve chuckles above you. "She knows you, Bucky," he says with a smile. "You too, Steve, please?" Youâre almost begging, but not quite, just asking nicely. "You want me to give you a hickey?" he asks with a crooked smile but those eyes are too easy to read. He craves you. "Or a bruise, or a bite mark, something, anything," "FuckâŠ" His face changes to match his dark eyes. "You want everyone to know you belong to us, Sweets?" he asks with a hoarse voice and you feel the large bulge in his pants press against your stomach.
You nod, biting your lip. "Show me how you do it, Bucky.â They spin you around and Bucky grabs at the collar of your blouse, pulling harshly, sending the buttons flying over the office. âHey-â you begin but he pulls the fabric aside exposing the juncture between your shoulder and neck. First, he sinks his teeth in, hard enough for you to hiss but not breaking the skin, then he closes his lips and sucks.
It's painful but the act in itself makes you throb. When he pulls back you release your breath but Steve is quick to pull the neckline on the other side and do the exact same thing. He is gentler but when he's done there is still a purple bruise on your skin. "Fuck me," you whimper against Bucky.
"Yes, Sweets, we will. Long and hard until you can't take it anymore. We're going to ruin you." Steve promises before he grabs you and lifts you up, spinning you so you can wrap your legs around him as he starts walking to the bedroom, Bucky right behind you. You reach your hand out towards him and he grabs it, kissing your palm and knuckles. "We're going to take care of you Sweets, you'll never want for anything," he promises with a wicked smirk.
Steve places you on the edge of the bed and stands up, looking down at you. Bucky comes up beside him, resting his forearm on Steve's shoulder. "Look at our sweets, can you believe it?" Bucky asks. Steve turns to him with a smile. "Yes." Then he places two fingers under Bucky's chin, turning his head before kissing him. It's heated, filthy and it's the hottest thing you've ever seen. You squeeze your legs together to alleviate some of the pressure you're feeling in your cunt. Their kiss shows that it's nothing new, they've obviously done it before and you're a little mad that they have withheld this from you.
When Steve starts pulling on Bucky's clothes you can't keep the moan from slipping out. They both break away and turn to you and you feel small in the best way possible. "Did you like that?" Bucky asks before leaning down and kissing you.
The knowledge that his tongue was just in Steve's mouth and is now sliding against yours makes you moan again. You start undoing the buttons on his shirt and he pulls on your top. When you separate, he pulls it off and youâre left in just your bralette. Steve makes a sound in the back of his throat at the sight and starts taking off his own clothes.
Bucky kneels in front of you on the floor, unbuttoning your pants and pulling them off, while you stare at Steve as more and more skin is revealed. He holds your gaze the whole time and you bite your lip when he starts at his pants. His chest and forearms are huge, covered in tattoos but in no way hiding the muscle underneath. It makes your mouth water and your cunt clench.
Bucky starts kissing up your bare leg, beginning at your ankles and slowly working his way up your calve and the inside of your thigh. When you're still staring at Steve he nips your skin. "I know he's gorgeous but when I eat your pussy I want your eyes on me, Sweets." He tries to look offended but his pupils are blown wide with lust.
Just the thought of him between your legs makes a shiver run through you and your cunt impossibly wetter. Nodding at him you caress the side of his face and watch him, the closer he gets, the more you start to tremble with need. No one had ever made you feel so needy and horny.
Bucky kisses your cunt through your underwear, making you gasp. "Please Bucky, I need you." "I know, I can smell how fucking wet you are Sweets." He twists your panties out of the way. "Fuck, Steve, look at her, she's dripping."
Steve, in just his underwear now, slides his fingers gently through the mess, making you tremble and moan, before bringing the fingers to his mouth and holding your gaze as he licks them clean. Then Bucky's mouth is on you, his tongue licking from your core up to your clit.
"Fuck-fuck-fuck-" you cry and grab the sheets under you, bucking up into his touch. Steve chuckles and gets behind you on the bed. "He looks like he's in heaven, Sweets. He has wanted you for so long." You feel his fingers undo the clasp of your bra and then slide it off. His hands cup your tits a second later, making more sounds spill out of your mouth. His fingers rub, caress, and pull on your nipples while Bucky is hurdling you toward your climax.
"I'm- I'm gonna-" Your legs shake and you grab Steve's arm with one hand, the other going to Bucky's head, grabbing his short hair. Every muscle in your body tenses right before the coil snaps, making you scream out your release, riding Bucky's face and feeling the pleasure-filled waves travel through your body.
You slump against Steve's and he holds you. Bucky pulls back with a shit-eating grin, wiping his face with the back of his hand, saying "Fuck Sweets," before he stands up and starts taking off his clothes.
You already feel amazing, high off your orgasm but you want more and Steve's hard-on is pressing into your back. You turn around on the bed. "Move up," you tell him and his smirk is knowing but he does as you say and moves to sit against the headboard.
You rid yourself of your drenched panties before grabbing his boxers and pulling them off. "Eager Sweets?" he chuckles and fists his cock as soon as it's free. It's thick and long as him and you can't fucking wait. You bite your lip before asking "Condom?"
"I know we should but I want to feel you raw Sweets,â he confesses. âAre you on birth control?" "Sure, and I got tested the week afterâŠ" you trail off not wanting the bad memories to ruin the moment. Bucky's heat is suddenly behind you, grabbing your hair and forcing your head back to kiss you deeply. When he lets go he says, "Steve and I got tested like a week before you moved in and I've not even looked another person's way since then." Steve laughs "And I haven't fucked anyone either so get over here and ride my cock Sweets."
To say you scramble is an accurate description, quickly shuffling over to him and straddling his hips. You hold onto his shoulders as he swipes the head of his cock through your mess, holding it still for you to sink down on.
All three of you moan in unison as his dick disappears into your tight hot channel. The grip Steve has on your hips is almost bruising and the look on his face is painful. âF-fuck. Sweets. Damn.â Is all he gets out. You lean in, kissing his cheeks and chin and lips, and start to move, slowly, the feeling is amazing, he's filling you up to the brim perfectly.
"Feels so good," you stutter and then drop down hard. "I'm never watching porn again," Bucky says from behind you and you watch him over your shoulder, kneeling on the bed and jerking his cock. You whine in the back of your throat, you want him too, so you reach for him as you bounce on Steve's cock, making him spill the most delicious sounds.
Bucky shuffles over and you grab his dick in your hand, he's big enough that it doesn't fit all the way around. His hand lands on Steve's shoulder to steady himself and Steve reaches out to place a hand on his hip.
The sounds the three of you make fill the room. It's moans, groans, and whimpers, the sound of slapping skin and squelching wetness. Your clit is steadily rubbing against Steve, getting you closer and closer. Bucky is panting heavily, Steve is too.
"Sweets, I can feel you. Are you gonna come on my cock?" Steve is trying to sound unaffected and failing miserably, but he continues to spill filth that rushes you toward the edge. "When I've filled you up, Bucky is gonna fuck my cum right back into you, aren't you Buck?" "Fuck yes," he groans before leaning in and kissing you deeply. âI wanna see you come on his cock Sweets.â
"Next time I wanna feel both of you come in me at the same time," you whimper. "Sweets, you goddamn slut." Steve groans with a laugh and bucks up into you harder. "Tell us more! Please! I want to hear every filthy little thought hidden inside that mind."
You turn to look at Bucky. "I want both of you in every hole. I want you to use me like I'm a toy and worship me like a queen," you tell him, then turn to Steve. "Put my name on the house and celebrate it by fucking in every room, on every surface, show me all of your kinks, give me everything."
Steve's eyes are screwed shut and he's let go of Bucky to grab your hips, pulling you down onto his big cock. "Keep going," you urge him, your release just a few thrusts away. But he's too close and before you can get there he suddenly sits up to wrap his arms around your waist, crushing you against his chest, thrusting up hard, and comes with a loud moan of your name.
You feel wild, right on the edge of ecstasy but left dangling in mid-air. With pleading eyes and a whine you look at Bucky who smirks at you before pulling you away from Steve and laying you on your back. A second later he fills you up, the sound of his cock pushing through Steve's mess is as sweet as it's nasty.
"Please, Bucky, please," you beg. "Yeah I know, don't worry, not gonna blow my load early," he taunts over his shoulder at Steve who just gives him the finger. "Understand him though, youâre so tight and warm Sweets. Makes me a bit crazy. I just want to fill you up over and over again," he confesses.
"I need to-" you begin but he cuts you off. "Rub your clit for me. Come on my cock," he demands but you know something that is even better than your own fingers and you reach out your arm.
"Steve," you plead and he crawls over to you and lays down beside you, pushing his hand in between your bodies, finding your clit. You arch off the bed with his touch, hands clutching Bucky's arms as he rams into you. The dual sensation is amazing and with how close you were seconds ago the end approaches quickly. Your moans get louder the closer you get and both Bucky and Steve praise you the whole way through.
"You sound so fucking pretty."
"I can barely move you gripping me so tight."
"You're so good at taking cock, Sweets. First mine and now Bucky's, it's like you were made for us."
You nod at the last thing and the pressure in your body is breaking, making your muscles convulse, almost pushing Bucky out with how hard you're coming, screaming their names as you do.
"Fuck! Yes, Sweets!" Buckyâs laugh is a little manic as he works you through it. "I'm going to fill our sweet little cunt with more cum." His hips stutter against you before he groans out your name and collapses on top of you. You run your fingers over his sweaty back and kiss his cheek. Then you turn to Steve, smiling at him beside you. "He's heavy," you complain.
Both of them laugh and Bucky rolls off before they move until you're squeezed in between them, their cum running down your legs, making a mess on the bed. Fortunately, you have at least two other beds to sleep in.
For a few months, you're walking on air. In a throuple with your two best friends, amazing sex, luxury beyond what you could have ever imagined. They constantly spoil you and they've tried to convince you to quit your job since you don't need to work when you're with them.
Tonight you're in another fancy restaurant. Bucky is trying to feed you chocolate cake because it's romantic but you tell him over and over again that you can eat by yourself. Suddenly Steve stiffens beside you and since he isn't known to have tells, you immediately get worried and follow his gaze.
John is standing at the door with a pretty girl on his arm, talking to the waiter and then being shown to a table. Next to yours.
When your eyes meet he stops for a second and his date shoots confused looks between the two of you, before you nod and he nods back, then moves again and sits down.
Steve asks for the check and you're out of your seat and outside the restaurant in no time. Bucky holds your coat as you put it on and a moment later Steve comes out too. His eyes are black with hate and when you're finally in the car you realize that you can't live like this.
"I think-" you begin, swallowing then clearing your throat, "I think I'm going to need those lawyers."
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