#buckle up it’s a long one

[jackklinemybeloved]

exasperated hot women played by brennan lee mulligan my fucking beloved

[north-noire]

just read the eulogy, henry.

[orobty]

HA HA! The rise cyoa clue game that I've been mentioning in tags for forever is finally here!!

Plotting everything out took a bit but I think I got most of the possibilities written out although I wouldn't put it past you guys to do something wild lol

So part of the way this works is that there'll be more options the more you've spoken to people but some people will only have a few options naturally! I tried to keep it in character and some of them just wouldn't lie/are very very bad at it, so ya get what ya get, hope you guys have fun!! (And feel free to send asks with theories and/or praise I accept both <3)

[bubbiethesaur]

Chapters: 18

Happy one-year anniversary to Long Road Ahead!! Here’s chapter 18 to celebrate  :3

Chapter summary: Don’t panic. 

[agreekdemigod]

The recipe for a great zosan cannonverse fic:

-Two cups of Unawareness of their own feelings

-One teaspoon of Cohabiting together in the Baratie

-Half a cup of Intimate conversations with the one you trust the most

-A splash of Unusual ways of courting

Bake under 170° of Heated marriage proposals and BAM, you got Recite Your Vows

[kentuckyfriedmegumi]

we have a snippet of a wip(pet) of mine!

here’s a sneak peek at chapter one of skinny dipping (water under the bridge)

an itafushi right person, wrong time fic ❤️

[randyortonofficial]

i wish we could turn back time to the best days of our lives

[yangjeongin]

HYUNJIN BIRTHDAY COUNTDOWN (2023 EDITION) ↘ D-12 | through the eras: GO LIVE

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

hold on ok i belted out a brief laughingstock Scene for possible future use that i Had to write down bc if i didn't, i'd never remember it. and why not share?

~

“Barnaby? Barnaby, old chap, are you with me?” 

Barnaby blinks, registering the green fingers snapping in front of his nose. He huffs a laugh and pushes Howdy’s hand away. “Yeah, yeah, I’m listenin’. You were saying?”

Howdy gives him an exasperated look, a fond look. “Thinking about running off to a farm again, were you?”

“Nah, just the clouds. They’re a lot less work.”

“Well I’d rather you didn’t. Who would I talk to during the long hours if you went and floated off?” Howdy winks before turning to his shelves, already yammering away about something or other.

Something or other that Barnaby is once again not listening to, because what was that? Barnaby quickly presses his cool paw-pads to his burning cheeks, feeling the bristling fur there. 

Has Howdy ever winked at him? Now that he’s noticed it, Barnaby can’t recall. If it’s new, then why? Why a wink of all things? What did that mean? And that look Howdy gave him… 

Barnaby adjusts his abruptly too-tight tie. It’s unusually warm in the store, isn’t it? Howdy must have forgotten to turn on the AC. 

Gosh, what is Howdy even saying? He’s still talking, but Barnaby hasn’t absorbed a word. He can’t even tell if Howdy is still speaking english. It’s all garbled.

There’s something wrong with Barnaby. He must be coming down with something… or he’s just overthinking it. Overworking the ol’ noggin. A good long nap should set him right. 

“Listen,” Barnaby interrupts, patting the counter, “I uh, I don’t know where my head’s at. I better go find it - I’ll see you later, okay?”

“Oh… alright, then,” Howdy says, a tinge of disappointment in his voice. 

Or maybe that’s just wishful thinking. Barnaby slaps that thought out of the park. He doesn’t want Howdy to be disappointed, that’s absurd. That’s something a bad friend would think. Barnaby may be many things, but a bad friend isn’t one of them.

“I’ll whip up a joke that’ll knock your socks off next time I see ya,” Barnaby promises. He smiles around the discomfort and the entirely new feeling squirming around each other in his chest. 

“Now you’ve gone and brought up my expectations,” Howdy says. He leans on the counter and grins. “Are you sure you can back up such a claim, Mr. Beagle?”

Another hot flush races under Barnaby’s fur, and to his growing mortification, his tail starts wagging at breakneck speed. He lets out an uncharacteristically nervous laugh and backs away from the counter. To both of their horror, his back hits a shelf, making it rattle and tip.

“Oh, sh-” Barnaby lunges to right it before it can topple. He whips around and laughs again. Howdy’s wide-eyed stare burns. “Sorry ‘bout that! Talk about a bulldog in a bugshop, geez.”

“When you find your head, make sure to screw it on nice and tight,” Howdy says, a strange look on his face to match his tone. “And check your temperature while you’re at it - it’s not like you to be off-balance.”

“I wouldn’t say I’m off-balance,” Barnaby says. He inches towards the door, willing his stupid tail to calm down. “I just have ears instead of rearview mirrors.”

“Uh-huh…” Howdy slides to the side, trying to peer around him. 

Barnaby fumbles for the door. The scrape and bang of his search for the handle echoes in the quiet store. One of Howdy’s eyebrows creeps higher the longer Barnaby stands there, making a complete fool of himself. 

Finally, the door clicks, and Barnaby nearly tumbles over backwards in his haste to get out. He stumbles down the steps and briskly walks away, adjusting his hat and tie. As soon as he’s out of sight, he slaps his paws to his face and sags against the bodega.

“Idiot,” he hisses to himself. He presses his back flat against the wall and slams the side of his fist against it. Normally, Barnaby would use a situation like this to his advantage. But Howdy wasn’t laughing, and Barnaby wasn’t being funny. “Bulldog in a - gah, idiot!”

Great. Now Howdy thinks he’s not only a clumsy oaf, but that he’s losing his touch too.

Barnaby growls in frustration, pushing off the wall and stomping away from the plaza on all fours. What does he care what Howdy thinks of him? Others’ opinions of Barnaby have never been anywhere near his list of top priorities - barring Wally’s, of course. If they were, he'd never tell another joke again.

Yes, Howdy is a good friend of Barnaby’s. A close friend, even. But since when has he had such a - such an effect? Barnaby shakes his head, growling again. 

There was no effect. Barnaby is just going insane. Or he’s getting sick, like Howdy implied. That would explain the sudden hot flash, the loss of typically impeccable coordination, and, oh yeah! Barnaby’s brain leaking out of his ears.  

[lenjaminmacbuttons]

boys!!! and some scribbles

astarion in that hoodie is actually the main reason i started coming up with this au

girls / bg3 singles ward overview

[sunsetsandsunshine]

~ Some Father-son bonding ~

(A/N: I LOVE THIS ITERATION OF SONIC SM- ESPECIALLY HOW THE WRITERS WROTE THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEM HIM AND TOM FOR THE FIRST AND SECOND FILM. I- SOBSSSS. I LOVE THESE TWO SM SO U KNOW I NEEDED TO MAKE A FIC ABT THEM 💞💕💖💗😭!!!)

Lee: Sonic🦔💙

Ler: Tom🍩🤎

Warnings: A little bit of angst in the beginning, harmful stimming (I’ll tag where it starts and ends) and tickling. If you are uncomfortable with any of the following please feel free to keep scrolling down :)

Summary: It’s been a couple months since the epic battle between Sonic and Eggman. The electric blue hedgehog could finally relax…right? Well…yes and no. Sonic has been living with the Wachowski’s for those couple months and it’s been great! But…he keeps feeling weird. His stomach gets fluttery and he can’t stop laughing for hours at a time…it's…really weird. Maybe he should talk to someone about this…

(A/N: Parent and child relationship. Nothing more. Nothing less. It sickens me that I have to put that in there (bc it should be obvious) but you can never be too sure…I just needed to make it clear that they love each other as family.)

——————————————————————————————————

Sonic was sitting up on his beanbag and playing with the rubix cube Maddie gave him about a week ago. He was dressed in a sweatshirt, a gift from Tom that was like 3 times his own size, going almost to his knees and blue fuzzy socks. He groaned as he finished solving the cube again for probably the 12th time now. Speaking of which, you’re probably wondering where he got the rubix cube from…and before you ask, no he did not steal it. It was quite the opposite actually.

Maddie noticed that Sonic was very fidgety at times and often pulled at his quills when he was nervous about something, or completely bored. So she decided to go shopping and buy the blue hedgehog some fidget toys. And by “some”, Sonic means like about 60-70 at least…he hasn’t counted but by the looks on how freaking heavy the box was when she gifted it to him, his estimation probably wasn’t that far off. 

Sonic groaned again, dropping the rubix cube he had in his hands and placed it on his desk, making sure to put it down delicately so he didn’t accidentally dent it; out of all of the fidget toys this one was Sonic’s favorite and he didn’t want it getting ruined under any circumstances. The hedgehog flopped on his beanbag, looking up at the ceiling and putting his pillow to his face before abruptly groaning loudly for like the 100th time, but at least now it was muffled by the pillow. 

Sonic wanted something but he didn’t know what…and this feeling was starting to get on his nerves.

Well- no- scratch that. He did- he did know what he wanted. But there’s no way in all of Green Hills he was gonna tell anyone about it.

There- there was this feeling in his stomach, but he didn’t know what the literal hell it was, and it’s been eating him from the inside since he’s come to Green Hills. His stomach felt fluttery, almost as if there were butterflies instead of intestines- but not in a bad way! In a very weird, confusing, nice way? If that makes sense? And another thing, he can't seem to stop giggling to himself. Which is odd. Because he didn’t even hear a joke or anything! He was just…giggling. Like what? But most importantly, he was craving physical affection apparently??? Ugh. See why he wasn’t gonna tell anyone about this feeling? Or…whatever this was?

Sonic looked at his phone- not far from where he was lying down on his beanbag. He remembers Maddie saying every time she left before work in the morning that if he needed anything, to text or call her…

This is probably what she meant. 

But he didn’t want to bother her. Sonic knew how important Maddie’s job was and he didn’t want to make it more stressful. Besides, what was she supposed to say to her coe-working people if Sonic called or texted? Oh! Sorry! The over-sized hedgehog I have living in my house wants to talk about this weird feeling he’s feeling! Hm? Oh, what feeling you ask? He doesn’t quite know exactly! 

Yeah. Thanks but no thanks. Sonic could handle this weird feeling on his own. Yep. He could totally handle this weird new feeling by himself. Uh-huh. He’s got this.

…

Maddie…Maddie wouldn’t mind…right?

…

Oh fuck it.

Sonic grabbed his phone and unlocked it, immediately going through his contacts to find Maddie- which wasn't hard. He only had two contacts: her and Tom.

✨💖The Magnificent Marvelous Maddie💖✨

Today at 1:38 p.m. 

Hey Maddie

If uh

If you’re not busy…can I ask you a question?

Sonic turned his phone off and put it next to him and after a couple seconds of waiting the blue hedgehog immediately regretted sending those three texts to Maddie. She’s probably busy anyway. Sonic could figure out this feeling by himself-

PING!

Sonic almost jumped out of his seat at the sudden loud sound coming from his phone. He really needs to figure out how to turn that sound down…he can feel it still ringing in his ears. He turned on his phone to see a text notification- 3 actually- from the one and only Maddie Wachowski…

Well that was fast. 

Hi, sweetie! 

And of course you can ask me a question ☺️!

What’s on your mind, honey? 

Sonic exhaled the breath he didn’t even notice he was holding in, unlocking his phone and going into messages to properly text her.

I’ve been…

I’ve been feeling weird lately- and idk why 

Ever since I’ve come to Green Hills to stay w/ u guys I’ve felt this way…and idk what it is and it’s been pissing me off lately.

So I was hoping…maybe you could help me figure out what it is?

Of course!

Could you maybe try to describe it? 

The thing is idk how to! 

I just- my stomach feels all fluttery 

Not in a bad way tho! Not like a roller-coaster fluttery or about-to-go-on-stage-and-sing-in-front-of-millions-upon-millions-of-people fluttery 

But like- a good fluttery I guess??? I just feel rlly giggly and stuff and it’s weird- but weird in a good way…

…

That doesn’t make any sense, does it?

No no! I think I understand, sweetie

And I think I can help 😊

WAIT- HUH???

YOU CAN???

Well, not me exactly

As of I’m not home right now 

But I’m sure Tom can help!

Wait what-?

How can Tom help w/ this I’m so confused 😭😭😭

Trust me 

In the past, I’ve had the feeling you’re feeling right now and Tom is the best person to help with it- so just tell him what you told me!

Uh…alright!

I guess I could do that 

Thanks Maddie 

It’s no problem, Sonic sweetie 😊

Okay, thanks again- I’m gonna go talk to him now

Bye!

Okay bye! Love you 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️❤️❤️☺️☺️☺️

Love you too 😗❤️

Sonic got up from his beanbag chair, put his phone inside of the desk and opened the hatch downstairs. Sonic quietly tiptoed down the stairs, making sure to dodge the places in the steps that he knew squeaked if he stepped too hard, peeking over the stairway to see Tom watching TV- and from the looks of it it looked like some sheriff documentary- he’s been watching those a lot lately…but Sonic doesn’t understand the hype. The sheriff’s on the TV could be talking about some random paint splatter on the ground and Tom would be hooked. 

“I can hear you trying to be quiet up there, Sonic.” Tom chuckled, still facing the TV as he went to grab the remote on the armrest and pause the TV. The brunette turned to Sonic with a “hah! Caught ya” grin, a grin Sonic knew all too well in his last months of living with him.

 The hedgehog sighed in defeat of being caught, walking down the stairs and going next to the couch Tom was sitting at. The brunette had a grey/gray shirt on with a light plaid print jacket, matching with some black pants and white socks. 

“Uh…’sup, Tom.” Sonic said as casually as he could before leaning on the couches’ arm rest. The brunette eyed Sonic suspiciously, raising one eyebrow as he crossed his arms. Sonic started to sweat under the older man’s glare, whistling and looking anywhere but Tom’s direction. 

“What did you do, Sonic?” Tom sighed, taking the blue hedgehogs’ sudden nervousness as a sign of him doing something he wasn’t supposed to. “I didn't do anything!” Sonic said, mimicking Tom’s expression and pose. The two looked at each other in the pose for a solid minute or two before laughing at their silliness.

“So what do you need, little man?” Tom asked. Sonic cleared his throat, fiddling with his hands and began looking at his feet because honestly? Staring at the ground was much much more easier than looking at Tom at the moment. “I just…I figured we could- y’know- hang out I guess?” The blue hedgehog started, “Some uhm…y’know some father-son bonding activities…?” Sonic said sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck, still looking down on the ground. 

There was an uncomfortable silence between the two and Sonic didn't like it. He didn't like it one bit. And the more the silence dragged on the more the blue hedgehog started to second guess himself about coming down to the living room. 

Pfft, “Father-son bonding?” He really has reached a whole new level of patheticness, huh? Why would Tom want to spend time with him? He’s just keeping him around because he pity’s him. He doesn’t actually enjoy his company. Just wait until Tom gets tired of him, then he’ll be all alone again-

Oh this was a mistake.

This was such SUCH a mistake. 

***Harmful stimming starts***

The hedgehog started lightly pulling on his quills out of nervousness with one hand while his other hand started tapping the side of his leg, “O-Or whatever. If- If you want to of course. I don’t want it to seem like you're being forced, hah!” Sonic said, letting out the best fake laugh he could muster before speaking again. “I-If you’re busy- y’know….with, uhh, you’re sheriff stuff…that’s fine as well. I don’t- I don’t care.” Sonic started slowly backing away from Tom, still pulling on his quills- but a tad bit harder this time as his hand tapping on his leg started increasing faster. 

Sonic could hear faint talking in front of him but he couldn’t focus on it. The only thing he needed to focus on was leaving before he embarrassed himself more. “Y’know what? I-I should go, you’re probably doing something busy anyway, uh…lemme get out of your hair, man.” Sonic grimaced, turning away and going to the steps, but before he could walk any farther Tom grabbed both his hands gently. 

***Harmful stimming stops***

“Hey…let’s not do that, okay? You’re hurting yourself….” Tom said softly, holding Sonic’s hands in his own as he kneeled down to try and match Sonic’s height. “Where are your fidget toys?” Tom gently asked, trying his best to keep the questions short and sweet to not overwhelm the younger. These types of moments have happened before in the Wachowski’s house; when Sonic started to panic, asking him too many questions would get him even more upset, so when this happened they kept the questions to a minimum and straight to the point. “I…I left them upstairs…” Sonic mumbled. 

“Oh. That’s okay…uh…here. Sit down on the couch for a sec.” The brunette said as he picked up Sonic and sat him on the couch. Rubbing his head affectionately before walking away to the kitchen rummaging through the kitchen shelves before coming out with a blue squishy ball. He came back to Sonic who gratefully accepted the ball. Tom sat next to Sonic as the younger leaned onto his shoulder, taking another deep breath and exhaling, muscles once tense now relaxed. 

“Sorry about that…” Sonic said, squeezing the stress ball harder and glaring at it as if it stole his last chili dogs. Well this wasn’t how he was planning this conversation with Tom to go. The older looked at Sonic sadly before sighing and turning his gaze looking straight ahead to the paused TV. “You don’t have anything to apologize for, kid. It’s alright.” Tom said. The blue hedgehog hummed at the comic, taking a couple more deep breathers.

There was that uncomfortable silence again, the one that Sonic despised. “I just…I dunno. I feel weird…?” Sonic said, squeezing his squishy fidget ball at a faster pace this time. The older didn't say anything but completely turned to Sonic, letting him know he was listening. The younger somewhat shrunk under the older mans’ look, feeling a tad bit pressure to go on but decided to ignore it. He wanted- no. He needed to get this off of his chest. 

“Ever since I’ve come to stay with you and Maddie after the defeat of Dr. Robotnik, I’ve felt…odd. I feel tingly, and fluttery and it’s just…weird, because I’ve never felt like this before, ever. I talked to Maddie about it in text and she said to talk to you about it…so uh…here I am!” Sonic sheepishly said.

Tom chuckled, “Is that why you said you wanted some Father-son bonding?” The blue hedgehog blushes at the mention, nodding his head. The older one chuckled once again, rubbing Sonic’s head affectionately, “I’d be happy to help you with this fluttery-feeling, buddy!” The blue hedgehog quickly looked at Tom as his ears went up in surprise.  

“Wait. Really?” Sonic asked. “Of course! But before I do, I gotta ask you a question…” Tom said waiting a dramatically long time before continuing his sentence. “Are you ticklish?” The older asked, smirking and raising an eyebrow up. There was a silence between the two, but only this time this one was in complete and utter confusion. The younger ones' eyebrows creased together trying to put together what he was just asked, “Um…gesundheit?” 

“What? No, kid.Tickling. Y'know, being ticklish?” Tom said as he wiggled his fingers near Sonic’s face only to be met by a confused look. “I dunno what you are talking about, man…” Sonic chuckled, now relaxing in the hug as he chuckled at the older mans’ surprised face.

Tom’s dumbfounded expression slowly turned to a soft, genuine smile, then it slowly turned into an evil grin. This kid had no idea what tickling is!

…

This kid had no idea what tickling is…

Oh Tom is gonna change that very quickly.

“Uh…Tom? You okay over there? Your face kinda looks like that green person we watched on Christmas…” Sonic said, wincing at the memory of the man’s genuine expression slowly slowly turning into an evil one. Tom stopped with his evil grin (for now at least), and raised his left eyebrow in amusement. “You mean The Grinch?” He asked, laughing when the blue hedgehog nodded happily at the familiar name. “Yeah, yeah! That dude!” Sonic smiled.  

“I need you to stay perfectly still for this to work though, okay?” Tom said in the best serious voice he could muster, but probably not as serious as he thought since right after he stopped talking Sonic started laughing a bit. “Pfft, whatever you say, Donut Lord.” Sonic snickered, hopping into Tom’s lap facing sideways.

Tom then began to lightly scratch along Sonic’s sides, the reaction was almost immediate as the blue hedgehog began to squirm lightly and grab at the brunette’s wrists; but not pushing them away. Sonic held his breath; trying not to laugh but that plan started to crumble as Tom began to poke at the youngers’ sides; more quickly than he was before. Sonic let out a tiny shriek before descending into little giggles, kicking his legs and shaking his head. Tom smiled at the adorable sight.

“Whahat? Hehey-! Hehey wahahait! Whahat ahahare yohou dohoing?” Sonic asked while becoming a giggly squirmy mess. Tom chuckled at the youngers’ question, making sure to go easy on him since this was his first time being tickled, so he’d start off with light tickles…for now at least. 

“I’m tickling you, silly! Since it does seem to me that you happen to be a bit ticklish~!” Tom cooed, now using two hands to tase around Sonic’s sides. Sonic threw his head back, suddenly lost in a puddle of giggles and fell on the couch, but still in Tom’s grasp as the brunette tickled up and down his sides. “Whahat ahare you tahahalking about?” Sonic giggly asked, his legs lightly stomped on the couch as some pillows fell in the process. 

“Hmm, hold on…” Tom said as he grabbed his phone from his jacket pocket, typing up something but making sure to keep the blue hedgehog in a giggly squirmy mess. “Ah, okay. Goggle states this: Tickling is the act of touching a part of a body in a way that causes involuntary-“ “Ihihi dohohon’t knohow whahat thahat meeheeans!” Sonic whined interrupting Tom, shaking his head back and forth giggling up a storm in the older mans’ lap. “You didnt even let me finish!” Tom laughed, moving one hand to tickle Sonic’s neck while the other still tickled his side. 

“PFFT- nAhAHAH! GeHEt ohOUT ohohOHOF theHEhehere!” Sonic giggly demanded, still holding Tom’s wrist as he scrunched up his shoulders. The older man chuckled before digging both of his hands in both sides of the blue hedgehog’s neck, fingers fluttering up, down, left, and right. Sonic’s feet drummed on the couch, trying to make a daring escape but anytime he was even a bit close to leaving, Tom would poke Sonic’s sides, leaving the blue hedgehog to be an adorable giggly mess. “Stahay still!” Tom playfully scolded. 

“THIhihIHIs ihihis soHO weeheeird!” The hedgehog giggled, his face beginning to turn a light red. And honestly, if Tom could start crying, he would- out of happiness of course. This was to fucking darn cute. 

“How many ribs do you think you have, Sonic?” Tom asked as he held both of Sonic’s arms up against the couch, trying his best to compose himself from not crying from the younger ones’ adorable reactions to the pokes. “Mahaddie sahahaid weehee hahave twehenty-fohour; twehehelve ohon eeheeach sihihide!” Sonic giggly answered, as he remembered Maddie did a walk-through on the human body and how many bones it has. 

“Hm…you sure? Maybe I should count them for you…” Tom didn’t even spare the giggly blue hedgehog a second to protest as he pressed his thumb into the lowest rib on the right side of Sonic’s ribcage, kneading and circling at a very very slow pace against the artificial bone. Sonic screeched at the sudden sensation against his ribs, kicking his legs a bit faster as Tom slowly slowly slowly began to “count his ribs”.

“One…two…three…” Tom counted aloud, remaining on a rib for about 5 seconds before moving up to a different one. Sonic lurched in Tom’s lap, attempting to pry himself out by pushing at Tom’s wrists but only caused the older to pin up his arms and continue kneading at his ribs. “NahAHA! WahahHAHAIT, plehHEHEase!” Sonic whined throughout his frantic cries of laughter. “Ihi sahAHAId iHi hahaHAVE tweHEHEnty foHOUR!” 

“I'm just double checking!” Tom innocently said as if he wasn’t completely wrecking the boy in his lap at the moment. The blue hedgehog squirmed and squealed at the tickly feeling at his ribs, being unable to do anything but just take it. This went on for a couple more numbers but then Tom suddenly stopped “counting” Sonic’s ribs, giving the kid another breather before hatching another evil plan. “Wait, what number was I on, Sonic?” 

“Tohohom! Yohou lihihiterally ohonly counted toohoo sihihix-!” 

“Oh, well. I lost count! Guess I have to start all over again~! 

Sonic froze in place, laughter now raising an octave as he helplessly squirmed in Tom’s grasp. “WahAHaH- waHahaHAIT *snort* nOHo dahHa- *snort* dohOHOHOn’t!” Sonic snorted, descending into a puddle of maddening cackles feeling the fluttery feeling again. So this was the feeling he was feeling…? He’d have to ask Tom later, when he’s not getting tickled to pieces. 

“Awh~! That’s so cute~! You snort when you laugh?” Tom cooed, wiggling his fingers near the blue hedgehog's ribs but very very close to touching him. Sonic’s laughter became more frantic and loud, squirming underneath Tom, and it's not like he could defend himself either! His arms were pinned up! This entire situation just screamed “unfair”. “NahaHAO! IHI *snort* doHOHon’t!” Sonic giggly said, knowing that- yes. Yes he did snort when he laughed, he did just a couple seconds ago…but no way in all of Green Hills he was gonna admit it, especially in this situation. 

“Oho really? What was that adorable noise you made just then, hmm?” Tom smugly asked. “YohOu’re heehEEARihing thihIHIngs…” Tom fondly rolled his eyes as he pinched and kneaded Sonic’s ribs, leaving absolutely no bone left out from his tickle torture. Sonic threw his head back and cackled like a madman, snorting every now and again as he squirmed like a worm, trying to stop the ticklish sensation at his ribs. 

“NAHAHAO! DAHAHAD *snort* PLEHEASE!” Sonic cried. Tom’s eyes widened at the name title the younger gave, not sure if the blue hedgehog meant to say it, but was very honored and happy at the mention. It made his heart melt. “Please what, Sonic? Pleaseeeeee keep tickling you?” Tom smugly teased, grin widening as he saw Sonic’s face heat up in embarrassment. Guess he’s weak to the T-word, huh? Oho I can and will use that to my advantage… 

“DAHAHA- *snort* OHOHO MY GOHOD! STAHAHAP SAHAHAYING THAHAT!” Sonic yelled as he shook his head back and forth. “Stop saying what, exactly? Tickle~? Ticklish~? Tickled~? Or do you want me to simply stop talking? Which one?” Tom laughed. “YEHEHES!” Sonic cried, not even completely knowing what he just said ‘yes’ to- he was too lost in his own laughter. Tom stopped tickling Sonic, letting him have one last breather before the final kill.   

“Ever heard of raspberries, Sonic?” Tom asked, knowing that he the blu hedgehog has, but probably not the ones he’s talking about. “Lihihike thehe fruhuhuit?” Sonic giggly asked. “Nope! Here, lemme show you…” Tom said as he blew a raspberry on the youngers’ tummy causing him to absolutely howl in laughter. 

“OHO MY *snort* GAAAHAHAD WAHAHAIT! WAHAHAIT!” Sonic screamed, completely not prepared for this new tickly feeling on his stomach…and why did it sound so freaking funny??? That was just gonna make him laugh more! “Wait for what Sonic~?” Tom teased as he blew more raspberries on his tummy, and with his free and scribbling up and down Sonic’s ribs. 

“WAHAHAIT- *snort* IHI *snort* DOHON’T DOOHOO THAHAHAT!” Sonic cried, blue sparks suddenly forming on the kids’ quills, sparkling here and there but some going off of his quills and onto the carpet floor, disappearing. Sonic cackled in the older Tom’s lap, the blue lightning on his quills adding a new ticklish sensation on him.

“Huh. Well they do say you learn new things everyday…” Tom mumbled, watching some of the lighting sparks fall off of the younger ones quills. “PLEHEHEASE! IHIT’S *snort* TIHIHICKLISH!” Sonic screamed, more tiny little blue sparks flying off of his quills and onto the floor. Tom chuckled at the little blue hedgehogs’ reactions, moving down to Sonic’s lower belly as he began to lightly flutter his fingers around it. 

“I think you mean ‘it tickles’, bud.” Tom said into Sonic’s tummy, chuckling. Tom was the sheriff of Green Hills- not the sheriff of grammar; at least last time Sonic checked. Tom began to blow more raspberries all over the little blue hedgehog’s stomach, making sure to add a few nibbles now and again to keep the younger in stitches- which worked out really well on Tom’s part. Sonic’s laughter became more high pitched and loud, snorting more frequently as the older started to raspberry and nibble his stomach.

“OHOHO MY GOHOD *snort* WHATEVER!” Sonic screamed as Tom began to switch between his lips and teeth nibbling mercilessly at Sonic’s tummy leaving the poor blue hedgehog in absolute hysterics. 

Tom dug his fingers in the blue hedgehogs underarms.And Sonic screamed. The hedgehog's feet were kicking probably about a million miles per hour, just looking like a complete and utter blur while the blue sparks on Sonic’s quills multiplied. 

“So~! I think I found your most ticklish spot, huh~?” Tom chuckled, lightly scratching his fingers in Sonic’s underarms, making sure to dodge the little sparks of blue lightning coming off of Sonic’s quills- which  he knew tickled the younger even more due to how much he was laughing. Sonic screamed underneath the brunette’s grasp, trying his best to not kick him in the face but the task being very very hard as his feet were kicking around a million miles per hour. 

“NOHOHO- *snort* DAHAHAH! DOHOHON’T!” Sonic howled, shaking his head back and forth while the heels of his feet dug into the couch. Tom, chuckled, now scribbling and scratching in Sonic’s underarms, “I’m barely even touching you!” Tom laughed, almost as hard as Sonic as he began to pick up the pace with his scribbling. 

“STAHAHA! *snort* NAHAHA- *snort* PLEHEHEA- *snort* DAHAHAHAD!” Sonic screamed, as happy tears started forming in his eyes which Tom took as a sign that Sonic has enough tickles for today. “Alright, alright! Just say Uncle.” Tom calmly said as if Sonic wasn’t screaming his head off. “WHAHA- *snort* WHAHAT?!

“Juhust say Uncle, kiddo-“ Tom said as he accidentally hit a very ticklish spot in Sonic’s underarm causing the younger to let out a girl-like squeal. 

“OKAHAHAY! OKAHAHAY! UHUHUNCLE!” 

Tom stopped tickling Sonic; letting the kid have a breather and putting him into a tight embrace. The blue hedgehog giggled softly in the hug as he melted into the touch. “You okay?” Tom chuckled, smirking at the younger who was still giggling from the tickles from before. Sonic nodded, wiping away his happy tears with his hand still giggling a bit. “So~, I’m Dad now, huh? What happened to being ‘too cool for your human parental names’?” Sonic blushed, pulling up his hoodie and sinking deeper into Tom’s chest. “Shuhut ihit….” 

“I really don’t mind you calling me Dad, bud.” Tom smiled. “Wahait whahat…? Reheally?” Sonic asked in genuine confusion looking up at the older with shiny eyes- Tom swore Sonic’s pupils had stars in them at that moment. “Yeah, I don’t mind.” Tom confirmed, patting Sonic’s back. Sonic’s eyes glistened a bit but the younger one soon wiped them. “Cool…” 

“So…that's called tickling?” The blue hedgehog asked. 

“Mhm.”

“So…you tickled me?”

“Yep.” 

“Huh.” Sonic said, not being able to say anything more than that. “How’s that fluttery feeling in your stomach doing?” Tom asked. “Fine, it's doing just fine.” Sonic smiled as Tom smiled back, rubbing his head affectionately and chuckling. 

“Let's go grab you some water, kiddo. And how about we make some cupcakes after that-“ Tom wasn’t even able to finish his sentence as the blue hedgehog excitedly ran to the kitchen chugging a glass of water and putting out ingredients to make the cupcakes. Tom chuckled, walking over to Sonic to join him. 

Tom definitely had to make a note to tell Maddie about his later, but as of right now he was going to bake some cupcakes with his son. And if they burn down the house in the process, oh well…they both can try coming up with a good excuse to tell Maddie as to why the house is in ashes. 

——————————————————————————————————

RAAAAAAH THROWS THIS FATHER-SON SHIT AT U 💖💞💞💞💗✨✨

I LOVE THESE TWO GOOFBALLS SMMMMMM THEY MEAN SM TO MEEEEEE😭😭😭💙🤎. But anyway, hope you all enjoyed it!!! I do have a couple more WIP fics on the way that r almost finished and a gift fic for someone as well which is ALSO almost done so be sure to look out for those :)

❗️❗️❗️ALSO DON'T FORGET TO DRINK WATER. ITS FLAVOURLESS BUT ITS GOOD FOR U SO DRINK IT PLZ❗️❗️❗️

[phantomskeep]

Putting the "Fun" Back in "Funeral" - Chapter 1

AO3 Link | Next Chapter

Chapter One: Furries, Cannibalism, and... The Goonion?

Danny sometimes wished he could travel through time. Don’t get him wrong! He knows the danger of messing up the time stream (Dan, Desiree, and Clockwork all taught him that much) but there are still times when he would sit on top of a building, staring at the stars, wondering what he would change given half the chance.

Currently, however, he was debating on his life choices while very much not on a rooftop.

White gloved hands shakily grasped broken concrete, slowly lifting his beaten body out of a crater in the middle of some random street. The latest ghost who had decided to try their hand at using Danny as a punching bag was one that he hadn’t encountered before. His usual roster of ghostly enemies still came by, of course. They all visited Amity Park at least once a week - if not more. However, the ghostly entity that Danny was currently facing? He had never seen them.

It was something that had been occurring more and more often. A random ghost would show up, declare a challenge against Danny, and inevitably lose.

As Danny raised himself out of his impromptu resting place, he considered the being before him. Dark, void black skin and fur greeted him. The ghost’s face was an odd cross between a horse’s and a dog’s - a long, block-shaped snout with a mouth reaching right up to under their dark red eyes. Pointed ears flicked wildly back and forth between a long mane that reached just up until the collar of the ghost’s thick golden necklace. The ghost’s choice of clothes baffled the white-haired man greatly; black dress shirt and bright, gaudy golden skinny jeans? Really? Who died and thought that was a good fashion choice?

Yeah, Danny was just as baffled.

The other ghost looked down at the young halfa, “I cannot fathom how you are the one Hotep described to me.” He sneered, clearly mocking Danny. “The great Akuris will easily defeat such a pathetic child.”

Danny gasped, mock-offended. “Well, Mr Tall Dark And Barks A Lot, I will have you know that at least I don’t dress like an accountant in the middle of a mid-life crisis.” He smirked before resting a soul-piercing green glare at the larger ghost floating above where Danny stood. “Or would it be mid-afterlife crisis?”

With that, Danny leapt back into action. He swung a powerful punch directly into Akuris’ long muzzle, causing the dark ghost to be pushed back. Amity Park’s ghostly hero did not relent on his assault, though. Danny followed the other ghost’s backwards momentum to bodily slam into his opponent’s soft belly in a move he often saw Dash pull during his football practices. The twenty-year-old halfa quickly grabbed the Fenton thermos off of his belt loop, taking the opportunity to finally capture the winded ghost.

A great sigh left Danny’s body as he hovered in the air, surveying the damage leftover from the fight between the two. It was well around two in the morning, judging by the placement of the twinkling stars. With a jolt, Danny remembered that today was the day of his coronation - exactly five years after he defeated Pariah Dark.

Originally, Danny had been told he was technically king of the Ghost Zone in the aftermath of the battle. The young ghost had argued with the mysterious time-themed ghost named Clockwork who had appeared and was successfully able to get a five-year grace period of kingly procrastination.

Since then, Danny had grown up a little bit. He defeated his alternate evil self, discovered new powers, traveled through time on Clockwork’s request, graduated high school, took a “gap year” to focus solely on fighting ghosts, and successfully never let his parents or the world know about his ghostly half. All in all, Danny considered it a successful time.

All good things must come to an end, though, the half-ghost thought as he kept staring dejectedly at the stars so far away. He knew that even though he probably should tell his parents what was going on, but the fear of everything going wrong lurked in the back of his mind. After the events of Dan, the young man pulled away from his parents’ bit by bit. It was grief that drove Danny to rip out the most vulnerable parts of himself, after all. If he had nothing to grieve about then he would never be pushed into doing something as drastic as destroying the world, right?

Jazz disagreed very heavily with his mentality, but he was fine with that.

Another sigh left the poor halfa’s body, and he re-hooked the Fenton Thermos to his belt loop. He might as well go back home to continue to lick his wounds before he had to, unfortunately, be crowned king. What a shitty Tuesday.

༼ つ ╹ ╹ ༽つ 

Later that day, at exactly three in the afternoon, Danny Phantom walked through the ghost portal in his parent’s basement. It felt almost like he was walking towards his own death - a quiet, somber affair with very little fanfare. Danny had made sure no one knew what he was up to; Sam, Tucker, and Jazz all had their own lives to worry about. He was sure that the three of them would give Danny the ass-kicking of the century for making them miss such a big milestone in Danny’s life, but…

Well, from the walk-through of the coronation his ghostly mentors laid out for him, Danny was sure this would not be a pretty affair.

Danny pulled himself from his musings as he stared into the deep green abyss in front of him. The young, white-haired ghost tilted his head forward, letting gravity take hold as the man fell into the Zone like a sort of twisted, backwards Baptism.

Useless lungs pulled in the ambient ectoplasm streaking through the air of the Infinite Realms. A parade of ghosts were waiting for him on the other side, lines of his soon-to-be subjects chanting his name. Ectoplasm-green eyes darted across the various ghosts lining the young king’s path, quickly registering those he knew and didn’t. Many of them wore clothing from various different eras, some seemingly dressed to impress their new ruler. Danny spotted one ghost in particular wearing what looked like a bedazzled bathrobe next to one whose long hair seemed to be braided into their dress. Some of the others who were cheering him on were more animal-like than Danny had come to expect, or were even completely non-humanoid. The odd shadow of a ghostly whale loomed over Danny as he turned his awed face upwards to watch the giant creature sail easily overhead with Young Blood’s pirate ship alongside it. Many loud cheers were heard from the ghostly child’s crew and large booms echoed across the infinite green surrounding them as cannons were fired. Smaller marine afterlife followed closely behind, easily marking the trail Danny had to follow to arrive at his official coronation spot with their different, bright colors. 

Even though Danny had gone over what he was supposed to do with his council, he still hesitated a little in the face of all the excited residents of the Zone. He knew, logically, that many were excited for him to take the crown. King Phantom’s reign was projected to be one of peace among the Realms, after all. However, seeing it? All of the souls - passed or created - of the Ghost Zone cheering for him?

Well, it made his core swell with a frosty sense of pride-I did this-they are safe-protect my people. It filled him with a feeling lighter than air and full of confidence, like he was actually making a good choice for once in his half-life.

Danny slowly started moving forward, waving at the Zone’s inhabitants, talking to those he knew. Pariah’s old castle had been slowly moving closer to where the Fenton Portal usually floated in the great expanse of the Realms. What used to be a two-hour flight was now closer to a little under an hour’s walk. So while Danny originally complained to Frostbite about how he didn’t want to slowly make his way there, he realized now the giant ice ghost was probably right when he said Danny’s stroll from his old haunt to his new one would seem faster than ever. It certainly didn’t feel like much time had passed at all when Danny finally laid eyes on the large, ugly castle that was going to be his.

Danny’s first order as king? Tear that eyesore down. Ew.

The thought made the young king snicker quietly, before slightly turning his head to eyeball the thousands of ecto-entities at his back. He scanned the ever-growing crowd under the watchful eyes of his various mentors. He could pick out Ember, Lydia, even that ghost who fought him that morning - Akuris? -, and so many more of his various frenemies watching Danny. 

The young man picked his methodical float back up to his new haunt. He could just barely see the figures bobbing at the front doors to the royal eyesore, though he could pick each of the Ancient ghosts out easily. Danny felt his core thrum nervously inside his chest, seeming almost like a heart with just how harshly it pulsed. Underneath his gloves, the white-haired ghost felt sweat start to form. But Danny kept making his way down to the landing where many ghosts were waiting for him to be officially crowned as king.

Danny really, really hoped he wouldn’t make an absolute fool of himself.  

As Danny looked up at the stoic figure of Clockwork, the various Ancient Ghosts fanned out beside the Master of Time: Frostbite had a goofy smile on his large face, Pandora wore a proud smirk, Ghost Writer was almost sneering at him as the smaller ghost floated next to his peers. Vortex was grudgingly gazing at the inhabitants of the Realms with his large arms crossed, and, finally, Undergrowth was completely ignoring Danny. Fright Knight, while not an Ancient, was standing alongside the various mentors Danny had throughout the years. Behind the Ancients floated many of the Observants, who gazed upon the Zone with an air of collective anticipation.

Taking a small step, Danny finally presented himself to the various ghosts looming over his much smaller figure. The halfa gave Clockwork a nervous smile, only to receive a tiny nod from the much older ghost. With an awkward about-face, Danny fully faced the entirety of the Ghost Zone steadily. He felt it when Clockwork stepped up to be next to Danny, the Ancient staying in his middle-aged form to address the Infinite Realms and her inhabitants.

“People of the Realms,” Clockwork started, his voice booming over the quickly quieting chatter. “Today is a new dawn for us. Five years ago, Danny Phantom defeated King Pariah Dark through single combat - sealing the King back into his Sarcophagus of Forever Sleep. This was a task that the Ancients ourselves struggled to complete in years past,” the blue ghost paused, resting a comforting hand on Danny’s (totally not shaking) shoulder. “And as our laws state, upon the defeat of the previous Ruler of the Realms the new King must take the final step into rulership by consuming all that remains of the preceding Crowned Head.”

Even though Danny knew it was coming, hearing those words out of Clockwork’s mouth made him shudder all the same. When he turned to face Clockwork the young halfa could feel Clockwork’s concern radiating off of him, even as he still went through the process of accepting the box holding Pariah Dark’s core from Frostbite. Danny tried to focus on the box - dark red with black trims, how nice - instead of what he was about to do. This was another part of the whole “you’re going to be king” schtick that Danny complained about greatly.

Eating another person, even if that person was technically a ghost, just felt so wrong to the halfa. Unfortunately, as Clockwork opened the sparsely decorated box, Danny was about to have to become a (technical) cannibal.

Yay.

The white-haired young man cupped his hands like he had practiced weeks prior. Clockwork gently lifted the swirling pearl to place in Danny’s waiting hands. Pariah’s core, despite holding one of the nastiest beings Danny had the unfortunate luck to meet, was honestly a thing of beauty. Dark reds dueled with lighter pinks, with small bubbles of fire and electricity leisurely swirling amidst it all, deep inside the older ghost’s core. Danny almost wanted to shake it to see if it would swirl like a snow globe.

Danny hesitates for a second, glancing up at Clockwork. The ancient being floated patiently, deep red eyes boring into Danny’s own. Ectoplasm-filled air passed through the halfa’s chest as Danny carefully rolled the pulsing core onto one gloved hand, slowly bringing it to his mouth. A shudder racked Danny’s body as he quickly dropped the warm rock-like core onto his extended tongue before hurriedly swallowing it whole.

For a brief moment, Danny only felt the dizzy sensation of nausea before a blinding surge of raw power burst through his chest. His core was practically vibrating with uncontained energy and felt like it was going to push through his chest like some sort of alien baby in a shitty horror movie. The sharp sensation of pain took over Danny’s entire world, his eyes open but unseeing.

It felt like hours had passed by the time the young half-ghost’s thought process was restored. He groggily blinked, attempting to focus on the present. Strength flowed through Danny’s veins - which he dutifully ignored in favor of looking up towards the oppressing castle behind himself. The keep itself was barely shaking, little pieces of rubble spilling into the greenish fog surrounding it. A pulse rushed through Danny’s core and he was in awe as he watched the depths of the Zone light up in tandem. A shaky hand reached up to clutch at the stylized letter displayed on the halfa’s chest - Danny could feel the Zone around himself. Trying not to panic, knowing that Clockwork said this was totally normal, young Danny, he managed to give his mentor a shaky nod.

The other ghost continued on with his speech, like the last few minutes hadn’t happened. Taking a large, glowing green skull ring from the steady hands of Undergrowth, Clockwork spoke. “With the core consumed, King Phantom will bear the Ring of Rage with a fair and just hand.”

Danny held his quivering right hand forward, watching as the older ghost slowly slid the ghostly artifact over his ring finger. Holding his breath, Danny waited. He fully expected the ring to reject him - who would put him in charge of an entire realm, after all? When the sharp sting of electricity never came, the halfa let out the smallest sigh of relief. His eyes met Clockwork’s own, earning a smile in response.

When Danny casted his gaze back onto the ectoplasm colored jewelry, he was shocked to note the colors and overall shape of it had changed. Before he had the chance to further inspect it, he was interrupted. 

“The Ring of Rage is coupled with the Skeleton Key,” Clockwork continued as Ghost Writer presented the glowing key to the other ghost, “and is used to access the many realms connected to our own. The Key allows our Crowned Head to reach any of his subjects in their times of need.” With that, Clockwork waved his hand in front of the artifact. When the key was back in Danny’s view, he could see it was attached to a sturdy-looking chain. The young man ducked his head, letting Clockwork slip the necklace over his head.

Clockwork turned to face Pandora, who was holding a flaming green crown in her hands. He gently took the headwear, before meeting Danny’s eyes. “And finally, to fully become Ruler of the Infinite Realms - Land of the Dead, the Eternal Plains, the Place Between, Heaven and Hell - a crown built from the fires of her core must be placed onto the brow of the Realm’s Chosen. King Phantom, kneel before the people you are to rule and accept this great burden for them. Feel their cores with your own, their obsessions alongside your own, and the Realm will fully accept you as her Crowned.” Gingerly, Danny dropped to his knees like he had practiced. He bowed his head, closing his eyes and waiting for the Crown of Fire’s weight.

When the warm metal touched his head, Danny felt the Zone shudder. As a bright light eclipsed Danny’s form, he could feel the metal on top of him change. In fact, as the young king tried to focus on his newest headgear, he could tell he was no longer wearing the white hazmat suit he died in.

The light faded and Danny took stock of himself. Monochrome rubber had turned into fancy-looking black pants tucked into armored white boots, a tight-fitting white shirt with his logo in black blazed across his chest, and a heavy-fitting cloak wrapped around himself. Danny wanted to inspect himself more - but the feeling of the Zone pulsing through his core brought Danny’s attention to the cheering of the thousands of ghosts around himself.

Danny was flooded with the feelings of happiness-hope-rejoicing-euphoria from around him. The Zone quaked, pulsing purple lights blooming across the infinite green void surrounding its inhabitants. A smile cracked its way across Danny’s face, and he didn’t even try to hide it as he faced his subjects. The speech Ghost Writer drilled into his head fled Danny, and for just a second he floundered. Before he could drown in the bottomless pit that was his brain, another pulse of pure hope shot through his veins.

Feeling like he was drugged, Danny spoke around his smile. “When I was a kid,” he started, “I never could have imagined becoming the King of anything. All I wanted to do was go to space, to see the stars watching over me.” He let out a laugh. Usually, these days, when Danny laughed it was world-weary and bitter. Now, high on the feeling of hope, his laugh was one of joy. “Now look at me! Look at yourselves! We’ve all come so far - and I promise to protect each and every one of you. I will be your star - your light in the dark, your guide to a better future.”

“You are the people of the Infinite Realms, and it is my promise to forever keep you all safe.”

The ghosts of the Zone cheered for him. Pandora flanked Danny’s right side, Clockwork on his left. A cold presence at his back told the new king that Frostbite was behind him. Danny could only assume the other Ancients were also surrounding him, but he didn’t dare look away from the mingling bodies before himself. As one, the Ancient Ghosts let their cores hum, speaking in a language known only to those of the Zone. Before him, Danny’s subjects joined in until a swelling song of hope-peace-happiness-new era flooded his senses, leaving the young halfa to float endlessly in the feeling of pure acceptance.

That day, as a chapter of the Ghost Zone’s history ended and a new one began, a song of hope touched the many universes attached to it.

ヾ( ･`⌓´･)ﾉﾞ

Jason’s day was going pretty okay, so far. He woke up a little before noon, made himself some breakfast, worked out for a few hours, and managed to read an entire three pages of a book before he got a call from his siblings about a potential drug bust. A majority of them had recently began working on chipping away at the increasing amount of drug trading going around Gotham. Ever since Red Hood had taken a step back from his self-appointment crime lord duties, other criminals have been attempting to fill in his shoes. It usually ended in one of Gotham’s various vigilantes drop-kicking said criminals into a wall, but still. Criminals were the worst kind of weed.

So with a grumble that was half for show and half pure annoyance at being interrupted, the man suited up and made a stealthily exit out his window. Apparently he had a pre-”Curbstomping the Newest Pain in His Ass of the Week” meeting to attend with a handful of the Wayne family.

Jason can only hope he doesn’t get stuck with the annoying ones for this.

His day was still going pretty well after the initial run-down of the game plan when he and Dick, who was decked out in his Nightwing wear, finally landed on top of a warehouse’s unstable roof. They were near the edge of Crime Alley and Robbinsville, closer to the docks than Jason’s usual patrol routes brought him. Based off of Oracle and Red Robin’s joint intel, a large shipment of illegal drugs was being delivered to the Iceberg Lounge sometime after dusk. The issue came up when the question of how the drugs were going to be transferred from wherever they were stored to Penguin’s business front.

Which is where the Batkids came in, apparently.

“Comms check,” Oracle started. “Nightwing, sound off.”

“Comms confirmed, reading you loud and clear!” The older vigilante chirped from where he was stretching lazily. “Red Hood?”

Red Hood sighed, speaking up. “All good. Red Robin?”

“Also reading loud and clear. Orphan?”

Three taps cut across the comms, letting the other four know their sister could hear them all. “Awesome,” Oracle started. “Plan A is ready on Red Robin’s signal. Remember - do not engage.”

Hood slowly rose from his crouch, shaking his hands out before letting them rest on the many holsters strapped to his body. “How many times is she going to say something like that?” He stated, words practically oozing sarcasm. “Every single time we somehow manage to still end up in a shoot-out.” 

The crime lord could practically see Red Robin’s eyes rolling, “And who’s fault is that, Mr. Emotional Support Guns?”

“Shut it, Replacement,” the Hood growled.

He lazily turned to look at Nightwing, a challenging grin hidden behind the red helmet protecting his face. “Race you, Dickface.” Hood stated before turning east and leaping off the roof in a burst of speed. The helmeted man ignored his brother’s sputtering protests as he tried to keep the small gap forming between the two while they parkoured to the docks in one of the most eastern parts of Gotham.

Jason wanted to laugh, to revel in the feeling of messing around with his older brother. Despite all the bad blood still looming between the rest of the Wayne clan (adopted, blood, “family friends” or otherwise) and Jason, he wanted to make up for his past mistakes with the rest of his family.

Does this mean he fully forgave Bruce for never avenging his death? No.

But did he see the man try. Dick told Jason about the full-body cast their father put Joker in as soon as Batman could. Which was more than Bruce ever told Jason, but whatever. All of the Bat’s kids know he’s emotionally constipated on the best days.

Things were still awkward between all of them, though. Jason talked more to Dick than the rest of the Bat Clan, mostly because he was the only one between the original three who actually apologized. For being a shitty older brother, for not being there, for not realizing Jason was back earlier. Really, the older man practically apologized for everything under the sun one night while Jason stuffed his face full of fries and tried his best to not be emotional. He still needed to talk to the others about everything that happened.

However, that meant emotions and Jason? Jason didn’t do emotions.

He was a cold-blooded semi-retired Crime Lord. Anyone who said he had any emotions besides pure, seething rage was a lying liar who lies.

Even though Jason’s head was practically higher in the clouds than his body was, he was abruptly reminded that he was doing some epic parkour when Nightwing finally passed him.

“You’ve gotten slower, Hood!” The older taunted as he did a theatrical flip between rooftops.

Red Hood let out a frustrated noise, all previous thoughts of his family forcibly shaken from his brain when he rolled onto a gravel-topped roof. 

The man could tell by the state of the buildings around him that they were getting closer to the docks. Red Robin and Orphan would be further north than Nightwing and himself. The intel collected had stated there were two locations being used that night; one was a dunce, the other had the actual goods. Red Robin originally wanted to only focus on the location with the actual drugs, but Nightwing was able to convince him to also hit up the secondary location for information. So, that’s what they eventually agreed to do.

Hood looked forward, eyeing Nightwing as the other slowed to a stop at the edge of the last warehouse’s roof before the high-chained fences of the port stood. “You ready to bust some kneecaps?” Hood quipped as he walked up behind his brother.

“But of course,” Nightwing playfully scoffed, “hopefully we got the drug side of things.”

“That’s a sentence that would worry most parents.”

Even with the domino mask covering the older vigilante, Hood knew he was getting side-eyed. “And you suddenly care about what parents think?”

“Not the time, Wing.” The crime lord practically growled. He knew that was a remark aimed at the sort-of hostility between Jason and Bruce. And he was going to be the adult in this situation, thank you, Dick, and ignore what his brother said. “Let’s go ahead and get this over with.”

“Alright, alright,” the other pacified, “time to get our sneak on.”

Hood rolled his eyes, even if they were covered by his helmet. He aimed himself towards the edge of the street between the two vigilantes and the fenced in areas. With a quick drop and a well-timed roll, Red Hood was in a secure shadow cast by the metal warehouse. With a near-silent grunt, Nightwing joined him. The two shared a nod while Nightwing let Oracle know that they were about to enter their targeted site.

The larger of heroes quickly moved across the small, broken down street. Nightwing was half a pace behind him, and the two easily vaulted over the tall, barbed fence unsuccessfully keeping out unwanted civilians.

Silently, they hurried deeper into the heart of the port, easily dashing between long shadows thrown between towering cargo containers. Hood only slid to a stop when Nightwing held up a fist - a silent order to stop. A few months ago, Jason would have completely ignored his brother’s signals and simply shoved his way past him. Now, however, Hood stilled just behind the smaller figure. With a hurried gesture, Nightwing grappled as quietly as possible onto the dulled metal stacked around them, Red Hood quickly following.

Hood watched as five figures turned into the alley the two had just been. Kevlar-covered fingers caught Hood’s attention in swift commands to spread out and attempt to follow the people below them. A quick nod of a helmeted head showed agreement and Hood silently stalked his prey from his perch on top of sea-touched metals. Nightwing slowly slinked the opposite direction, going his own route to cover more ground.

The five people, dressed in stereo-typical “Goon in Hiding Garb” (as Dick helpfully named it so many years ago), continued on their journey between the containers. Their silent observant kept close watch on them, doing his best to listen in on their conversation. A fit of frustration ran hot and angry through Hood’s veins when he realized that, in order to clearly hear what was being said, he would have to plant a bug of some sort.

Which meant he would have to get closer. And Jason? He really did not want to do that.

However, since Hood was such a nice person, he would put his frustrations to the side in order to successfully plant a tiny Batbug. He was just that nice.

Hood waited until his unsuspecting targets rounded another corner to take action. Once the end of his grapple line was securely hooked, the helmeted man quietly slung down to the concrete-covered ground. After releasing the grapple’s hold, he continued after Penguin’s goon squad. He carefully peeked around a corner, took aim, and quickly threw a small robotic Batbug after them. He watched only long enough to see the tiny piece of technology successfully bounce and latch onto one of the goon’s shirt before ducking out of sight. Hood tapped the side of his helmet to turn on the listening device and stood still as voices flooded into his ear.

“-and like I was saying, Sal, some days it’s better and others it’s worse.” A woman’s tone was the first Hood could make out. “Just do what the bossman says, take your cut, and keep your head low. So long as you try to not break a lot of laws you’ll be fine.”

A younger man’s voice followed behind the woman’s, “I don’t know… The pay is good, yeah, but I’m not too keen on being someone’s punching bag.”

Hood could only presume this boy was Sal. While the man wasn’t one to put stock into guessing ages based only on the sound of their voice, Red Hood found it very difficult to even begin to think this kid was of legal age. It wasn’t that surprising, but it did make Hood’s heart ache and begin to feel a wash of rage ebb into his mind.

“Don’ listen ta ol’ Tracy, kid,” a third voice joined, this one with a thick Narrows accent. “Jus’ get the money ya need ‘n get out. Boss ain’t gonna fault ya for tha’.”

There was a small pause in the goons’ conversation and Hood took this opportunity to glance around the corner again. The five of them were further down, far enough where he could confidently follow within the shadows without being seen.

“... Thanks, Mark,” the kid’s small voice made the Pit Rage lingering in the back of Hood’s mind swell once again. Kids shouldn’t be joining the many villain gangs that lined Gotham’s streets so young. He knew it was hypocritical for the Red Hood, once most feared crime lord in Gotham to be saying, but he practiced what he preached. Kids that came to the Hood for help were given it, no questions asked. He did what he could to make sure no child in the Alley went cold or hungry. Red Hood protected his people.

The Penguin did not.

It was this knowledge, that Cobblepot was openly risking the safety of these children, that set Jason off. The leather protecting his hands creaked as he clenched his hands. He was shaking as he desperately fought to keep the rage from creeping into his vision, mentally warring with himself. Blue eyes blinked behind white lenses, still tracking the hazy figures through the toxic green fog swirling before him. 

He needed to keep following them. At a distance.

Jason honestly wasn’t sure if he could control himself if he got spotted and put into a confrontation.

Quickly grappling back onto the top of the many containers surrounding him, Red Hood continued to follow the people he was eavesdropping on. The five continued to chatter as they unknowingly led a temperamental vigilante straight to the heart of their operation.

Nightwing was keeping tabs on another group he had spotted, if the quiet commentary he was filling the comm line with was any indication. The group Nightwing was following was heading in the opposite direction of Red Hood - meaning that it was likely the older pair who had pulled the short straw of the night.

Which only caused Jason’s frustration to grow. The man really, really wanted to punch something now.

However, Jason was experienced enough in the art of “conceal don’t feel” to not let the raging emotions burning his inside explode outwards. He kept on task, easily keeping up with the small figures below him in an awkward half-crouch.

It was when the small group made it out of the corn-maze inspired cargo storage system that everything went right into the shitter. A massive, green-painted ship swayed gently in the tide, her mooring lines quietly creaking with the strain of keeping such a large vessel moored. Red Hood quickly attached his grapple to a parallel line of containers stacked in the direction Penguin’s goons were heading in. The near-silence of the night, however, did nothing to hide the shocked gasp as the feeling of absolute peace overcame Jason halfway through his leap to the other side.

The worn handle of his grapple gun slid out of Jason’s grasp as he plummeted to the quickly-approaching concrete. Luckily, the man was able to twist enough mid-air to land across his side. Unluckily, he landed directly behind the previously stalked squad of goons.

A quiet, “shit” was all Hood was able to say before the raggedy bunch turned to face him. The man quickly jumped to his feet, pulling out his dual pistols in the same movement. He did his best to try to compartmentalize the growing panic in his chest. Hood kept reaching for the giant void so often full of swirling rage and finding nothing.

He fired rapid shots at the scattered goons, striving to not shoot the smallest one. However, for all of Hood’s training, nothing could have prepared him for being in the middle of a firefight while actively seeking the very cause of all his problems.

Shooting a well-aimed bullet through a hispanic-looking man’s knee, Red Hood rolled behind a sun-bleached blue container. The sound of rapidly approaching footsteps made Hood whip around, coming face-to-face with another three of Penguin’s goons. He could also see two suspicious figures booking it down the ship’s gangway. Hood knew he could handle a fight like this, widening his stance and taking lazy aim at the hostile figures. His first shot went wide when a pulse of hope-settled-forgiven rushed through him, leaving Jason’s eyes useless and his legs shaky.

A bullet piercing through the body armor on his shoulder was barely enough to bring the man out of his head, leaving Jason to realize he was about to be surrounded if the feed from the Batbug was to be trusted. The distant phantom feeling of lounging in the sun, on his favorite chair in a giant, book-filled Wayne Manor library made Jason realize something was wrong. What should have been pain was only half-baked fuzzy feelings of warmth and comfort. It was enough to cause Jason to shoot wildly around himself, bringing a hand to clumsily tap on his helmet. When the man finally heard feedback from someone else’s com, he drunkenly slurred to whoever was listening.

“I-I need b’ck’p,” the hooded man said, firing a shot that went through a goon’s abdomen, “‘m drugged?” Jason couldn’t help but giggle as a smaller body got closer to him, turning his near-unresponsive body to slam the other into unforgiving concrete. An armored boot smashed the goon’s head against the ground. “Hemlo to ya’, too!” Jason laughed as the voices of his siblings flooded his ears.

Another burst of gooey happiness reverberated throughout the crime lord’s body, causing his vision to blackout again. He turned to see a woman with a gun pointed at him. She was the last one left, Jason blearily noticed, her friends’ broken bodies scattered across the ground around him. When did that happen? Jason doesn’t remember them playing, he thought with a frown. It was only when a black-clad individual backflipped into Jason’s narrowing view that he realized Dick had shown up at some point. 

“Big Bir’!” Jason cheered as his brother smoothly took down the last person playing. “Ya go’ ‘er!” His vision went dark again, but the feeling of something rapidly tapping his cheek brought the world back into focus.

“Hood, Hood can you hear me?”

Jason groaned in response, weakly pushing at his brother with heavy arms. “Shhhh,” he hissed, “‘m try’ng ta l’sten!”

Dick’s masked face, darkened with spots of speckled blood, danced with black spots around his vision, “Hood, what do you mean?” The older one asked.

Instead of responding, however, Jason’s body decided that talking was too much work. A peaceful feeling overtook him as he fell unconscious to the increasingly worried voice of his big brother, and a song of hope sung deep within his being.

( ुᴗᵨᴗ)ु.zZ

A/N: Hello! Please pardon any bad writing, it's been one hell of a hot second haha. Anyways - this has been an absolute labor of love from me. I've had this chapter finished since mid-February but a combination of my jobs, schooling, and a big editing block made it hella late. That being said, huge shoutout to my two betas @the-archer-goddess and Aerois! Legit could not have done it without you guys <3

Taglist: @vixen-uchiha @apointlessbox @mentalcarebear @asphyxia778 @horribly-lost-and-gay @may-rbi @blacksea21090 @kyrianclawraith (Hope I got everyone! If you want to be added to or taken off the taglist feel free to ask <3)

[whatevermakesyoubreak]

chapter 5... i predict... you will also like it... <3

>i actually really like this one. i posted too much smut, so i had to balance it out with some actual plot this time.

[generallysapphic]

gooddddd morning , working on this right now expect it tomorrow!! i want to particularly thank @maybachinparis for sending me this lovely request and i’ve been working on it for soooooo long i hope you guys enjoy when it comes out!

as always leave your @‘s to be tagged, i started tagging a few regulars 👀👀 ready heheh

[snubbullls]

Some weird looking bugs

[goldenamaranthe-blog]

The Evolution of Team RWBY

How each member of team RWBY would react when *NSYNC  or Backstreet Boys plays over the radio. Buckle up, Buttercups. This is a long one.

Volumes 1 & 2: Think RWBY Chibi roadtrip

Yang: (totally singing and dancing while driving. Not quite full sending yet, but still dancing with at least one hand on the wheel)

Blake: (reading and trying to ignore Yang’s shenanigans, but is lip syncing the words behind her book)

Weiss: (mortified) “Ugh! Seriously? Ruby, do something about your sister!”

Ruby: “Aw, c’mon, Weiss. It isn’t that ba- OH MY GOD!!! THIS IS THE BEST PART!!!” (copies Yang singing and dancing to the chorus)

Volume 3: pt. 1

Yang: same as 1&2 but purposely serenading Blake as much as possible

Blake: smiling and doing little shoulder bobs with her book in her lap

Ruby: Full send! Dancing like a maniac. Seatbelt is unbuckled and she’s shaking the car at stoplights

Weiss: rolling her eyes but smiling

Volume 3 pt. 2 & 4:

Radio silence

Volume 5: post Weiss and Yang finding each other. 

Weiss: (on Bumblebee - notices the song first and smiles before pretending to be mortified) “Oh, no! Not this song! Whatever will I do?”

Yang: (finally listens and beams) “You can join in some of the fun!” (drives bumblebee in a way that makes it look like the motorcycle is dancing)

Blake: (hears song over Sun’s scroll as he plays it for Kali, and smiles)

Volume 6: While the party is being pulled on a trailer behind bumblebee

Yang: (plugs scroll into bumblebee audio slot) “Alright! Time to shake off that apathy!” (sings and bobs while driving)

Ruby: “Yes!” (stands up in the trailer and dances like a goon)

Maria: “Would you sit down before you throw us all overboard?”

Blake & Weiss: (roll eyes before laughing and doing a synchronized shoulder shake left and right)

Oscar: (clinging to the trailer for dear life as it bounces) “Are they always like this?”

Volume 7: Fun Atlas Montage 

Ruby: Full Send! Jumping up on bunks and dancing like an idiot and singing horribly off-key.

Weiss: Actually dancing along to the music.

Blake: Trying to dance but is only solidifying that she has no rhythm.

Yang: Full dance machine and singing along with the choreography.

Volume 8: 

Radio Silence

Volume 9:

Blake: (plays song on scroll to lighten the mood and pulls Yang to her feet) “Still have a dance for me?

Yang: (gay disaster extraordinaire) “Always!”

Weiss: (rolls eyes fondly) “Brothers, you two definitely went from one end of the spectrum to the other, didn’t you? (joins in the dance party after grabbing Rusted Knight Jaune)

Ruby: (sulking in the corner)

Volume 10: Please Greenlight

Bonus!

After The War: Everyone is back in the car. Yang is driving. Blake is shotgun. Weiss and Ruby are in the back.

Yang: Completely losing her mind as she sings and dances in the driver’s seat. Hands aren’t even on the wheel consistently. Serenading Blake at every chance while holding imaginary microphones to Weiss and Ruby in the back.

Blake: Seatbelt? What seatbelt? Girl actually found some rhythm and is doing full body rolls in her seat while singing and winking back at Yang

Weiss: Singing a perfect harmony to the song while dancing. Her window is rolled down and her arm is waving out in the air like she absolutely does not care.

Ruby: Standing on the backseat so she can stand in the open sunroof and hit that choreographic combo 100%. She still can’t carry a tune in a bucket, but she’s doing her best. 

Team ORNJ parked next to them at the red light doing the exact thing with Nora in the sunroof, Jaune driving, Ren sitting shotgun calmly, and Oscar flopping around like a chicken having a stroke in an attempt to dance.