#btw i didnt really understood what theyre doing

[plumonthemoon]

im so fucking excited for skzflix ive waited YEEAAAARRSS for this im not going to sleep until november 3rd <3

[crescentmp3]

hiii im home! ^-^

[homoeroticbetrayal]

Iconic Homoerotic Betrayal: Round 1

Round 1 Directory

Context (they're really good very passionate):

Nagi/Reo (Blue Lock)

basicallt bluelock is a soccer program being funded by the soccer association (i swear i know soccer im tryna speed through this) theyre tryna make it so japan wins the world cup and to do so you need a strong striker. so they gathered all the young adults (hs graduates) and put them in this program, which, if you're eliminated, you dont have a career in soccer at ALL. they didnt know this walking into it :p. so reo and nagi met in school and reo saw him (rich kid, gets what he wants but doesnt really know what he wants yk) and said that he has to have him. or....... something. anyways, reo needed someone to learn soccer with and he chose the most antisocial sleepy guy on campus. and then proceeded to be an absolute simp (theres a scene he literally massages his back.) he also has canonically called nagi "good boy" (nagi said "yes boss" to him as well) context for the specfic betrayal was the game required them to be in teams of 3 and this is after reo and nagi's previous team of like 8-10 lost to isagi's team. reo and nagi said that they were going to go to win the world cup together. thats always been their promise. (theyve known each other for half a year i think. which is a short amount of time to be so attached LMAO.)

they also have a second betrayal which is honestly worse than this one, and reo's team loses to isagi/nagi's team and nagi tells him he's done with reo.

its a common theme of nagi never picking reo btw. reo was upset after the game because after you win a mtach you pick someone from the losing team to advance with and NAGI DIDNT ADVOCATE FOR REO HARD ENOUGH I GUESS AND ISAGI TOLD THEM ALL THAT THE BEST CHOICE WAS CHIGIRI. so they had another homoerotic fight that im never getting over. hope this meets ur criteria. they're in their exes era. its slightly better tho because nagi does feel bad/sorry for what he said.

(Other anon, I'll include your essay if they make it into the next round)

Geto/Gojo

"He was my friend, my one and only" ultrapowerful, one tried for it one born with it bitches but the twist is one was so consumed by the twisted horrible nature of humanity he went all Magneto but a lot more murderous while the other one only stays nonmurderous because he believes in changing the system by training the next generation. You don't understand he spared him, you don't understand, Gojo's devastation of knowing that he didn't do anything to help him as he slowly literally ate and ate and ate hate and pain to protect people that didn't protect his own. The devastation of knowing that there was nothing else to say nothing to do no way to help him bring him back he'd changed into someone he understood but simply couldn't support. Geto's betrayal, leaving everything and everyone behind because their way not only wasn't working but it was protecting those who wouldn't protect them. Geto laughed for the first time in ten years after all this when Gojo said something to him , the moment before he (Gojo) killed him, carried his body, refused to have it burned. Geto gets basically possessed and when Gojo sees not!him for the first time he freezes and gets captured, Geto almost breaks the possession momentarily whe he hears his name , he doesn't, Gojo gets captured, Geto is stuck, cursed , dead.

[my-castles-crumbling]

okay so hi..

um ive seen people do this so ig im going to as well.

basically i and my gf (she/her) have been in a relationship for nearly 6 months (6 in two weeks). we're both 19.

we met through my bsf and her bsf dating and now we are (i had the biggest crush on her but genuinely didnt think she'd give me a chance).

ive had pretty bad luck in relationships before and they never lasted more than 3 or 4 months mainly due to the fact that im asexual and btoh previous oartners just assumed they could change me (???) but she genuinely understood and went out of her way to make me comfortable and make it known that nothing will be demanded of me more than that which i can give.

from the beginning of the relationship, ive made some rules very clear which are like my no nonsense ones, like i wont tolerate them usually at all.

one of them being not making me purposefully uncomfortable and the main big one is not yelling/shouting, especially at me. (i have past trauma from my parents and it has in the oast made me shut down completely for days at a time, only getting up to feed my cat)

on one of our beginning dates i mentioned this really nice and sorta expensive restaurant that ive always wanted to try but reservations are really hard to get.

she joked saying that oh id love to go with hou ehicb i laughed at but was mildly excited about.

so i got the reservation for yesterday, i made the reservation for two.

last month i told my girlfriend that i have finally got the reservation and would like to go with her, told her the dates and time and everything and she seemed genuinely excited to go with me.

now last week i confirmed her availability again, and asked her what colored dress she was wearing so i could match it with my clothes and we decided on a color etc and also to get ready at my place because her bsf has their family over so shes will be staying with me for 2 weeks.

now, yesterday, after i was done with my work i went to the living room just to well see her and hug her cz i missed her a bit since i hadnt really seen her in about 5 hours (i was working). when i knocked at her door, she opened it and was ready with a dress (not the color we agreed on), her purse laying in the background as she greeted me with a big smile and kiss (on the cheek).

i asked her isnt she ready a bit early and she just looked at me confusedly and said no i hve to meet R (her friend) at 4:30 so im just on time.

i asked why and where she's going just to know if she'd be back and she said that theyre going to the mall and then to the movies because R is leaving in 3 days to go on vacation so they want to spend some time togetehr.

i smiled and wished her luck, i thiught that maybe i got the day wrong but i hadnt and i was actually really sad because all my life, everyone in my family would repeatedly just forget about my plans and my shit for others' and she knew abt that.

but anyways, so i decided to still go and i took this really lovely lady, who's homeless but i buy her a meal everyday and take her out to lunch once a week. (shes like in her 30s btw)

we had a lovely time and the food was divine, i even helped the lady get ready in a changing room.

but anyways on my way home i realised i had 3 missed calls from my girlfriend and a text that just said.

we need to talk as soon as you get home.

the moment j entered my apartment, she just started to yell at me about how much of a piece of shit i am, how people forget and its not a big deal, how im an arse, how not everything is supposed to be about me, and could i possibly imagine how she felt coming back to an empty apartment, she thought something had happened to me.

that is not the order she sais everything in but someway through my breathing started to get extraordinarily fast and i coukd feel my vision getting blurry.

i said sorry to her, or i think(?) i cant really remember stuff when i get panic attacks like this. i took my cat and went to my room.

it took quite a while for my cat to calm me down bur she was able to in the end.

this morning, i made breakfast for her and since i have today off from uni i decided to go to my job (i work part-time remote but can come and go to the iffice if i wish)

its my break rn and im thinking about it, maybe it wasnt a big deal? maybe i should have reminded her again but like idk it was a pretty big thing for me.

i feel bad, i feel like i made a mountain out if a molehill and shouldve just apologised properly and explained to her that its okay and that it wasnt that big of a deal.

i dont knwo?

i wanted some advice because i truly feel very strongly for her and shes the only relationship ive had in which i feel valued and had zero self doubt (up until yesterday)

im sorry it was so long, and thank you for your help.

Hi!!

Okay so...this is hard because, I don't know if either of you are to blame, here. Your girlfriend wasn't great for forgetting, but then I was wondering why you didn't say anything? But then she was shit for yelling later....

I'm wondering if this is the first time this has happened? It sounds like a lack of communication, you know? I think you guys really need to sit down and discuss how you were both feeling. But if this becomes a pattern, especially your girlfriend yelling, I would think more about the relationship.

Keep me updated! I'm naming you orange anon.

[tragicomedys]

ok ...

[maschotch]

i just know that when strauss was going "she died quickly btw" those other two people in the room with them were like "girl omfg" like don't get me wrong i know what she was trying to do but the first time i watched that episode my mouth was just hanging open

i find strauss FASCINATING i think its so interesting that she doesnt know how to be gentle about this even tho she wants to. like.. she’s trying so hard but she just… doesnt know what to do? i mean she’s lookin at a guy who she saw as a threat, as a rival, and she’s realizing… he’s really not at all like what she thought.

essentially from the beginning of us seeing strauss as a sort of antagonist, hotch has been so staunchly defensive of his team—his family. he’s willing to sacrifice his career to protect gideon, he can list the strengths and weaknesses and emotional struggles of each member of his team and insists that he just wants to stay w them. and its as if… she didnt believe him?

i dont necessarily fault her for assuming he’s trying to climb the ladder: this is a man who’s worked his way to being incredibly successful—practically renowned—in two separate careers. he has drive, he has ambition, he has his eyes set on higher places. intimidated or threatened arent really the right words… but she’s being practical by assuming he’ll continue to push higher

theyre in such similar situations as well. both of them have become distanced from their families: estranged from spouses and rarely seen by their children. they sacrificed their families for their careers, strauss just assumed that he had given up hope of those intimate family connections.

i dont think she understood until each team member sat in front of her—some anxious, some hostle—and defended him with a fierce loyalty that only comes from love: no matter the state of his home life, no matter the hours clocked in, he’s still a family man at heart. he inspires that in others. and not being able to protect his family… nothing is more devastating.

i think she identifies w him in a way, which is part of why she found it so frustrating to deal w him. so his loss hits harder than maybe it otherwise would. but at the same time she misunderstood him. and now she sees him, beaten, broken, and overwhelmed by grief, and she feels this gnawing guilt in the pit of her stomach thinking of how long she doubted him

[knightzp]

HI AGAIN MIKI! Sorry abt this novel of an ask /D UR RIGHT CHILDE'S DESIGN IS UGLY aksjfnaks these arent even hot takes tbh theyre just facts! also candace yeah hers is... i agree. Things i like abt her are her shield + heterochromia (nod) + her colours! and ah dont get me wrong i love bennett, and ofc razor! (he was the first 4star i pulled and im v attached to him) my irks towards their designs are mainly bc i think they deserve better. and i think ur completely right regarding ayato’s design! Smth more traditional (like ayaka’s?) wouldve been a lot neater + fitting! every time i look at his long sleeves i cringe just a bit (hes one my mains tho pfft). and yeah abt sumeru! after all the orientalism, insensitivity, tone-deafness by hyv throughout the region i rlly dont like many of them… at least design wise, tho i like their actual personalities! (srry nilou + nahida + dori) also obvs bc of how white they all are ugh yup ur right. reason why my fave sumeru chars are cyno + collei who imo can do no wrong + i already liked them from the manga lmao (i would type more abt sumeru but its just beating a dead horse @ this point)

Oh yeah i love those designs too! Kazuha is such a bby girl :)) And kokomi!! her pastel colours + attacks are so pretty! what chars have ur favourite ult animations + why? which are the ones u’ll never get sick of? (i love yelan’s, shenhe’s + xinyan aka my beloved who deserves More) I hope im not bothering u w/ these questions btw but i rlly enjoy getting to know my mutuals! (also i rlly appreciate u putting the accents over my name, tysm it rlly warms my heart!) 

TŪĪ HI AGAIN!!! im so happy to see your reply!!

ajsfdlk im VERY GLAD we agree on the childe part (his design really is UGLY) and many of the other things too!!! just saying things as they are bc we are absolutely correct 😌​ oh and yes i understood what you meant abt bennys and razors designs! their designs are indeed quite basic and simple and they could have had better ones for sure. its just that i really like their characters and im already a bit attached with the designs they have but that doesnt mean they couldnt have or deserved better ones! and abt ayato, yes i was exactly thinking he should have like a male version of ayakas design!! and was so disappointed when he didnt. those long sleeves.... ajkdlfs i get you yeah, theyre so WEIRD and useless they only serve as ayatos boba tea storage

abt sumeru... yeah hyv is def not listening and just doing what they want and its. so disrespectful. ughhh the characters do really deserve better design wise yeah. and collei is one of my fave sumeru characters too! i also saw her first in the manga (tho idk if i ever finished the manga? bc it wasnt complete in the official website when i read it) and then seeing her again in the main story, years later and with the remaining sequels of all she had suffered before.... i love her a lot she deserves all the love in the world 💜​

ooh and my fave ult animations! the prettiest for me is probably kokomis animation! i love how she makes like a water swirl and everything turns blue and purple its so so pretty!! i also love kazuha (all the anemo and maple leaves around him is so Beautiful) and ayakas ult (she looks so pretty with her sword and her hand fan right about unleashing a huge cryo swirl) a lot. oh and hu tao yoimiya and albedos too! (i feel like im just mentioning my mains at this point but well ajkdlfk i see their ults a lot so is normal that theyre my faves ig!) and ooooh shenhes ult animation is also very very pretty i really like hers too! and xinyans!! her ult is def the best from all the 4 stars, its sooo cool how she sets her "stage" on fire and YES she does deserve a lot better bc shes an amazing character and i love her a lot too!

oh and dw youre not bothering me at all!!! on the contrary im always so happy to see your asks!!! i love interacting with my mutuals too and i really like talking to you! and abt your name yes of course! i made sure to write it as it is and that includes the accents obviously!

now i have a question for you! well, several questions actually but theyre all related: which are your fave genshin characters? which of them do you have, or rather, which 5 star characters do you have in general? is there any character you dont have that you really want? and finally, what are you fave teams to play with?

okay now i thinks that all for now! hope you have a great day!! <3

[char-lotteral]

I agree with Kishimoto never trying to use the girls. The hate they get is not fair. I used to defend Sakura back in the days because I hoped kishi would do her justice. When shippuden started I WAS SO HAPPY because I thought this was the start of something great for Sakura and the girls but NOOOOO. Every time, Sasuke showed kishi turned her brainless. If you compare Naruto's actions and Sakura's actions to sasuke, you'd see they're completely different. What's up with that weird fake love confession scene 😭? It makes her look like she was manipulating Naru. JEEZ.

Also he literally had badass Tenten and Temari with cool useful abilities and he didn't use them ?! TF ?! Thank god for modern authors who treat their characters with respect :)

okay2 you know how i am with these longass rants so click readmore and brace yourselves

The way I see it, Sakura's character development in shippuden was always one step forward, two steps back. She gets this really badass scene (like her fight with Sasori and those cool ass medical skills) but is then regressed back into a pining girl in love every time Sauce is on screen or Kishi just throws her in the background YET AGAIN.

I love Sakura's abilities actually. Her brute strength, intelligence, vast knowledge and skill as a medic nin. But what I dislike about her character is how kishi handled her feelings for Sasuke. Naruto and Sakura's obsession with Sasuke was so???? huh??? it was so damn toxic and i never once understood why both Nardo and Sak were so obsessed with him. They were a team for one year???? I mean its great that they care about him alot but Sauce's feelings were kinda valid. His freakin clan died. Id go batshit crazy against my own village too. BUT BESIDES THAT. Both Nart and Sakura's Sasuke obsession was so annoying. 80% of shippuden was literally Keeping up with the Uchihas or Naruto yelling SASUKEH. BUT what irks me so much is the fandom's double standards with both Naruto and Sakura. "Oh Sakura shouldve gotten over her Sasuke obsession" but then turn around and call Naruto's obsession cute and gush about how he's so in love with him!!

Hot take but the only reason why sasunaru is "the most developed ship with the most chemistry" is because theyre both male characters.

I guarantee you if Naruto was a girl and SHE would be the one to have this unhealthy obsession who was chasing around Sasuke, the fandom would shit on Naruto just as much. And if Sasuke were a girl, Sauce would be sidelined like the rest of the female cast and Naruto would have another male character to have a "brotherly bond" with, because thats the only bond Kishimoto is actually good at developing. Yey for male characters having all the screentime and cool assets <333

And about that confession scene, I get her intentions. I really do. I understand that she did that in order to bring him home and that she cares about him but honey, w-why?? Why lie to him about your feelings?? Supposed he DID believe her, then what? then what kishi???? huh??? Some of her fans point the blame on Sai or whatever but I personally dont see why that scene was at all necessary. Maybe to establish Naruto's feelings for her wasnt all that serious? or his maturity? idk man. That scene was such a clusterfuck.

In the end her development in The Last and in Boruto was immaculate. She had one of the best glow ups in the old gen and ironically enough, her character wasn't butchered in Boruto. She got badass scenes she was cheated from in shippuden. I also love how she's finally getting the spotlight she deserves. Unlike the other konoha 12 :,)))

Okay onto the next female character that Kishi completely wasted. My baby. My light. 🙈 AAAHHH HINATAA.

I DONT EVEN KNOW WHERE TO BEGIN OKAY2 DEEP BREATHS.

Let me just establish this real quick. Hinata's goal was to get stronger because of Naruto, her goal was never to be with Naruto. She wanted to become someone who is worthy enough to stand beside him, someone whom he can consider as an equal, as a partner. She NEVER once said "marrying Naruto-kun is my all time goal UwU" (if youre one of those weirdos who interpret her character that way, youre immediately invalid, go take a hike)

I personally dont have anything against their crushes but to the point of making their personalities revolve around these guys every time theyre onscreen is so fucking frustrating. And with the way he writes their dialogues is so.damn.cringey. Like that one scene in the war arc with Tsunade and Madara

"I mAy bE a WomAn but I aM nOt WeAAKKKK"

BAAHAHAAHHA WHAT?? Everyone else gets coolass monologues and one liners but thats the best you can come up with Kishi?????? Hilarious.

If im being honest. Hinata's character is actually kinda well written. Not well executed. Dear God no. But with the way he set her story, her personality, her chracterization. She's honestly one of the best written female characters on the show. IMO. By Kishi's standards of writing women ofc. She's hands down one of the most complex characters. Her shy personality wasnt out of the blue, it wasnt a cutesy waifu trait. Her abusive upbringing made her that way. Her trauma turned her that way. So yeah, sue her if she looked up to Naruto as an inspiration when everyone else in her family treated her like dust. Shit on her for having Naruto's love light in her dark when her own damn father wouldnt even look her in the eye and her entire clan shunned her because she was "weak." She doesnt owe her family shit so idgaf what they do with the Hyuga clan. Neji and Hanabi aren't included btw

Im not gonna deny that her role in the show was only as the love interest but tbh for a love interest, Im glad her character wasnt so one dimensional. It just pains me SO MUCHHH how fucking wasted she is. Every time she's with Naruto, they always make her into a damsel in distress. They always feel the need to turn Naruto into the heroic prince. How cute.

LIKE THAT ONE SCENE IN THE LAST WHERE SHE'S THROWN IN THE CAGE?? WHY??? LET NARUTO AND HINA FIGHT THAT FREAKING ALIEN GOD TOGETHER. QUIT WITH THE TOXIC MASCULINITY. WE GET IT. NARUTO'S STRONG. GOOD FOR HIM. NOW LETS SEE HINATA THROW HANDS AND PUT NARUTO IN THE CAGE GODAMMIT

Hnggggg dont get me started with her role in Boruto. She's as relevant as a damn houseplant in the manga. They made her into an invisible trophy wife and "the mc's mother" and we all KNOW what happens to the shounen mc's mother once mc is in need of character development :) Quit putting her in the background. Give us that scene where she won against Hanabi DESPITE being retired for years. Give us that scene where she trains Boruto. GIVE US ANY FIGHT SCENE OF HER WHERE HER POTENTIAL ISNT WASTED WTF?¿

Now if you say that Hinata didnt have development. YOURE INVALID. She came from an abusive household, the shyest girl in her class, her insecurities got in the way of her own confidence, had difficulty of standing up for herself now became a loving mother of two, has the guts to kick her husband out of the house(with whom she couldnt even keep eye contact with when she was a kid) became the strongest hyuga, most supportive wife and mother, and has given her kids the comforting childhood she never had as a kid.

She has one of the most beautiful stories in the show and if you think her personality is only Naruto-kun and big boobs, then im sorry that you cant appreciate such a heartwarming story.

And I agree, killing her would honestly make me feel more at ease than continue to see her suffer because of godawful misogynistic writers. But at least let her die in an epic fight. Please. PLEASEE. She got nerfed so bad, i feel a physical pain every time i think about it

Okay what else. I think Ino got pretty good development. Another wasted potential in shippuden but she's doing good for herself in Boruto. I dont know what Temari is up to. They basically made her into another classic angry mom who beats up her husband for comedy trope. Haha very funny and original! Im not sure with her career, im not that invested in the anime.

Tenten??

oh G O D Tenten. The dirtiest of all. Her jokes about her screentime is so mean and i hate that its true ahsjhs. She was the only female character in OG who's goal wanted to be as strong as Tsunade but what did Kishi do to her?? Sidelined. Forgotten. Irrelevant. Like every damn female on the show :D

Konan shouldnt have died. I blame plot armor. I know in my heart that Konan wouldve kicked Obito's ass if it weren't for Kishi's boomer mindset.

Tsunade had so much hype when she was introduced but died down in the war arc. Madara wiped the floor with the kages. Holy shit. Not only that, but yipee! Naruto is there to save the day AGAIN!!!!

AND UGHHHH If the female characters were given proper treatment then maybe MAYBE all the endgame couples wouldve made fucking sense????¿¿¿

I think that ends my rant. Im not sure how the female characters in Boruto are handled. Except maybe Sarada (she's pretty well executed in the manga imo). But arguably they are sooo much better handled in Boruto than how the old gen girls were. And thats because Kishi isnt anywhere near the new gen female cast. I cant formulate a solid opinion with the other new gen female cast since im not entirely invested in the anime. Not ashamed to admit that I only watch it for the sunshine moments and for Hinata :DD

[alienfru1t]

i was the anon who sent the eyeroll dream thing and genuinely actually do you have any feelings about like dream and by extension sapnap trying to assert themselves into pop off trio streams

because i’m not gonna lie as much as i love dream and sapnap and yeah the going dark thing was funny, they do have this problem where they show up and get confrontational about not being invited and when they do that shit and put everyone on the spot about “being left out” it’s very weird to me you should just accept they want to have a stream alone right..? i was wondering what you thought about that and whether you think they genuinely feel threatened about being left out

like let george hang out with his other friends maybe i doubt they’d do this if it was quackity and karl with anyone else or even just them alone

also i’m too much of a coward to discuss this on my own main idk if you know who this is but i have a feeling it’s smth you agree with and it’s veryyy nice to see someone calling sapnap and dream out for their occasional annoying and stream ruining behaviour

sorry this is so long!! you also totally don’t have to answer btw lmao i just notice the same frustration sometimes through your liveblogging whenever sapnap and dream crash a stream

anonymous: wait wait to add onto my last ask it was the biggest power move for karl to announce that the sex havers only consists of george karl and quackity and i really felt like that was a hint drop from him, i think jokingly adding that anyone else is “a friend of sex havers” was to lessen the impact but i still enjoy the fact that he asserted (and has been asserting) that their group when they’re together is an exclusive trio

i felt it that time he was like yeah well. we were the original sex havers groupchat and i feel like sapnap and dream kinda wriggled themselves into being included like i hope none of this sounds mean i just really want dream and sapnap to understand it’s okay to not be included in everything

oh MAN do i have feelings 😩 dream and sapnap are almost comically emasculated by any little thing that makes them feel inferior and that includes being excluded from things. and i personally feel they have no right to get angry about being left out and to then show up onto their streams to express that theyre upset in front of an audience of thousands. i say this because the other three ALWAYS mention that they dm'd them and invited them to the activity or otherwise said they had reason to believe dream or sapnap wouldnt be available (and even outside of that, theyre not required to tell the other about every single one of their plans lol)

i think getting confrontational about it on stream in the middle of planned activities is childish. take a look at bad for example, who also isnt a part of the trio but doesnt get confrontational about having been left out. the trio is full of lighthearted people, bad came into the call and they asked him if he wanted to join in the game they were playing and he did and that was it. compare that to dream or sapnap and when they join calls. theyre consistently immediately accusatory. the trio will take it in stride (cus again. an audience of over 100k is watching. its really not the time and place to whine and get mad about feeling left out, those are convos to have in private), theyll throw some facts like "we invited you" "you said you were busy" "we already had this planned for a while" etc., then theyll offer an invitation to join. this invitation is usually met w quite frankly STUPID debate about "well why wasnt i included in the first place" like dude. read the room, youre streamers for a living, talk about these things off stream like an adult. plus they literally already said you could join if you still wanted to, whats the problem, why drag it out for longer than it needs to be. it just stalls the stream and their plans and shifts the lighthearted tone into somethin a little more careful (however briefly it might be, it didnt need to happen)

i LOVE karl for saying that theyre their own group and joking that their attitude is why theyre friends of sex havers. it felt like a lighthearted way to lift the mood again and kinda say "hey, we do our own things sometimes, chill"

i cant speak for whether i think they genuinely feel threatened about being left out cus not only do i not know them personally, theyre also not ccs i focus energy on (thats for quackity and george 😌) i DO think that with all the times theyve brought it up when crashing the trio streams, they should really by this point have talked about it off screen. it feels almost like they use the audience as a safety net to avoid the consequence of intruding/being mean cus whoever theyre talking to has to keep a certain face and therefore cant say certain things (might even hazard a guess that off screen they probably still dont REALLY talk about it)

i dont blame them for wanting to be a part of things their friends are doing but i blame them for the way they express that. it makes the atmosphere tense by making it far too personal for something thats visible to a live public audience.

i know theyre around the same age, but the way dream an sapnap handle conflict on screen IS immature vs the way quackity and karl do. quackity and karl have been entertainers for A WHILE and understand how to stay entertaining and theyre far more aware of their audience and the overall mood and how to handle problems and conflict without things getting too tense. dream and sapnap (sapnap moreso) have a habit of being confrontational and not lightening the mood and instead continuing to be mad, making everyone else in the call responsible for the energy of the stream instead of them themselves dealing with the tenseness theyve caused. it makes things awkward and im always hoping itll end fast and that theyd please for the love of god talk about it off stream

thats worded a little dramatically cus its rarely ever THAT bad, but it would be SO much better if it just didnt happen yknow. if they understood that they dont have to be a part of everything their other friends do AND if they understood that getting mad on stream and stalling their plans and souring the vibe isnt the best way to handle it.

tl;dr: theyre their own group who do their own things and arent required to share their plans w the rest of their friends (and usually they dm in advance anyway asking if they wanna be a part of their plans). dream and sapnap feeling excluded isnt something they should get overly heated about on stream (its an immature way to bring up the issue especially without ever offering a solution). these are problems they should talk about off stream where the trio dont have to be so conscious about their audience and its perception. i love karl and quackity for emphasizing that theyre their own group with their own plans and joking that the way they act is WHY theyre not part of the group. i think they deal w it as well as they can and i think dream and sapnap need to learn just a little more spacial awareness and how to handle conflict

edit: quackity/karl/george should be fully able to have their own stream together without anyone else intruding. dream and sapnap arent their bosses, they dont need to run all their plans by them first. if they want to have streams with just their own established group, they should be able to have that.

[normal-thoughts-official]

I've seen anti-saphael posts that only focus on Raphael's faults and act like Simon is a poor uwu baby who did nothing wrong and is being hurt by the big mean vampire man. Okay... Raphael wanted his people to be safe and Simon wanted some of that entitled ginger pussy no matter the cost. But sure. Raphael is the bad guy.

why do i feel like im being lured into a trap idndjdndidndidndj to be fair im not anti-saphael or anti-simon, i think that they could have a lot of potential together, especially in the future, when things settle down and simon is more mature and etc, i think they could be really good for each other. i even wrote a few fics revolving around this (okay i wrote two but you know), i think there was a lot of shit between them but nothing that can't be fixed over time

with that being said! i think the problem with how some ppl perceive raphael and simon's relationship is that classic "taking a legitimate reaction to aggression as violence, but not the aggression that incited it" that happens a lot with marginalised ppl's, particularly poc. nine times out of ten, raphael lashed out at simon for legitimate reasons, because simon was absolutely, 100%, comitting acts of aggression against him and the vampires, but not the obvious, physical/verbal violence kind. Raphael, in turn, responded by yelling or being verbally violent, and that's what people focus on, instead of the fact that he was actually... pretty goddamn patient with simon

a good example on that is the scene when Simon went to talk to raphael about the Daylighter thing. ppl complain that Raphael yelled at him. but he asked simon to leave him alone three times. he was clearly distraught, in tears, the person he loved most in the world had just died, and simon wouldnt fucking respect that! and then raphael screamed at him, and hes the bad guy, because you know, he screamed. but that was a reaction to the very violent act on simon's part of not allowing him to grieve his own goddamn sister, and demanding that he stop everything and help simon, despite the fact that he didnt owe simon that

not to mention everything else surrounding simon and rosa. people are very quick to forget that simon threatened to hurt rosa, idc if it was izzy's idea and he was reluctant, he still did it, and besides, that's all that raphael knows about it. not to mention he refused to help raphael with the Daylighter thing, and because of that, he didn't even get to go to her funeral. but then he demands Raphael help him with the very same thing. on the day that she died. thats pretty fucking violent, if you ask me

and look, im not saying simon is a bad guy, because hes definitely not, hes actually very fucking sweet. but he is extremely entitled (particularly on the earlier seasons), just as much as clary and jace. and he also has no clue what he's getting himself into, from the start. he doesn't understand that his actions have consequences, hes careless, and because of that, he puts all of their lives at risk. he got Raphael tortured because he was so careless. that's a real thing that happened. Raphael was tortured because of simon

and again, i dont think he meant that to happen, i think he was dumb, and that he only had shadowhunters' version of the facts, and he was way too blinded by Clary. he was also clearly very, very immature, and that's something that we got to see him grow out of a little bit. but there was a war going on, and Raphael had a people to lead and save, a responsibility with them all. he didn't have the time to patiently explain the facts of life to Simon (who btw never cared to listen), and even then, he tried to. Raphael tried to reach out to Simon and help him so many times it's not even funny. hell, if it weren't for him, clary wouldnt even have gotten his body back. he tried time and time again to get Simon to understand, and Simon didnt, and kept getting him and all of the vampires at risk. so Raphael lashed out. and then of course, hes the violent one. but people ignore that Raphael's reaction to him was legitimate, because Simon was, even if unknowingly, risking all of their lives and wellbeing. and if thats not violence, i dont know what is

one more time! im not saying simon is a bad person. i really, really dont think he is. i think he's actually one of the most well intentioned people in shadowhunters, but intention, even if it matters a lot, isnt everything. and it particularly isnt everything when there are lives at stake. it particularly isnt everything when you refuse to listen, and act entitled because Raphael was, from the beginning, kind as fuck to him

I'm also not saying Raphael is perfect, because he said some pretty hurtful shit. but i am saying that he was always acting in defense, not attack. Raphael never, not once, was the one to attack Simon first. but Simon didnt do it with words, and so ppl who dont understand what its like to suffer microagressions dont see where he's coming from

with all of that being said, id like to reiterate again that i still think their relationship has potential. i think that the fact that they still clearly like each other even after everything that's happened between them (hell, simon was willing to die for Raphael) means a lot. I think that Simon has grown up, and has the potential to grow up, a lot, and that in more peaceful times, as im going to assume they will be post-canon because our boys deserve it, okay, they could be really, really good for each other. i think Simon has the potential to not only break Raphael out of his shell, but also make him really look at himself in a different light, and Raphael has the potential to help simon grow and be more sure footed, steadier, more confident.

that doesnt mean they would erase all that happened, but i think they could build good things despite it all, if they talked it through and really understood each other, which i think they could do because theyre both very empathic people. it's one of the things that draw me to their dynamics; their potential for forgiveness, for re-examining themselves, for seeing how context dramatically changed their relationship and dynamics because in a less vicious context, they are good together. so yeah. i dont think what happened between them has to be between them forever, although i do hate it when ppl simply ignore it

but the perception that Raphael was the violent one and Simon wasnt is definitely rooted in an entitled, blind to microagressions point of view, and that's something that needs to be addressed, even within their relationship, if you want it to really work post-canon

[irregulardiaryposts]

00:53 21/06/2021

Hello again <3

so i think im gonna write about my mental health today because i dont feel like i have anyone who understands fully apart from myself maybe so i need to Organise my Thoughts. as a kid i had a pretty normal childhood, a mum a dad and a brother - pretty nuclear right. but as a child i felt like my family maybe wasnt quite right, that this wasnt supposed to be what family is? perhaps. - i was scared of my mum a lot because she wasnt very understanding of me - and i was a great kid, never getting into trouble, very good at school, no issues whatsover. the thing that really shows how i thought of my relationship with my mum was when i was like maybe 8 or so having a parents night and at it my teacher had nothing bad to say apart from i was kinda bossy in group settings (im sure i dont need to explain how misogynistic that actually is- i was not bossy i was a natural leader) and when i got home my mum told me off for that and i felt like she was kinda cold to me and not taking all the good things about me into consideration when telling me off for that.

i feel like thats a really defining moment in my life when i realised i cant expect adults to Understand me, realised how people treat young girls, also started my defiant behaviour maybe or was kinda one of the key moments that made me dislike certain authorities in my life, that if people wont understand me regardless of how i explain myself then i wont bother trying to be understood by people who wont matter to me. anyway yes i was scared of my mum-like petrified sometimes- but my dad wasnt great either, he also had his shortcomings. i feel like he never really cared about me like he was kinda apathetic towards raising me like a parent - i feel he would be better suited as an uncle to someone rather than a dad - the funny childish guy that makes kids laugh -not the uncaring dad that cant be bothered to really learn about his kids. and i feel im sitting here complaining about my parents when the fact is that a lot of adults should never be parents, society has conditioned people into thinking the only way to be fulfilled in life is to live vicariously through your kids when life gets to such a boring and monotonous place where you feel the need to create a new life to spice things up lmao. i feel a lot of parents regret having kids but they cannot express that regret because it was their choice and they should deal with that, also saying you regret it would be pretty horrible to the kid.

so while yes i am complaing about my parents i dont think they were Bad in any way just not that great yaknow. also i just notice all these things growing up and i feel its been pretty impactful to understanding myself and my parents. also just some anecdotes from my childhood - i used to watch my dad play video games like the uncharted games i think theyre called, and whenever i got scared i used to hide behind the couch until the scary part was over (usually a lot of guns and high energy fight scenes thats too much adrenaline for a 7 yo) and sometimes when i would take out my dad/brothers game i would get them to fo the hard parts and do other stuff myself - i dont remember many games i played apart from one of the spidermen games where u could just web around the city and not progress apart from sometimes you would come across some strippers and i accidently got into a fight with them (also hot women with umbrellas they use to fight- maybe i went near them on purpose) i would yell to my dad and get him to do it for me. also on new years eve whenever my mum was working and we werent going to any family parties we would make a bunch of food and put it out in the kitchen - wed make like homemade onion rings, chips, have crisps and dips, and a bunch of junk basically and watch like austin powers or some shit and genuinely miss those times they were so simple. but a lot of thats tainted now from what happened. also my brothers always been annoying as shit but when we were kids we couldnt be in the same room without arguing which like whatever thats how kids are esp brothers and sisters for some reason.

i think thats majority of the background needed for the rest. wait this is a little addition but i meant to mention this here so ill put it in- basically sometimes on holidays i would geniunely think my parents hate each other/ were getting a divorce like once when we were in florida in 2012 my dad convinced my mum (as well as me and my brother convinced her since we liked them) we convinced her to go on a water slide thing that u had to walk up the stairs for, it was outdoors, and it was kinda tall and then we got in one of the big donut things and it swooshed from side to side a lot and was generally pretty scary i suppose for someone who doesnt like rides esp since you had to hold on to the handles there were no buckles or anything, and so when we got off the ride my mum was big mad at my dad and like wouldnt talk to him and stuff like that which was pretty uncomfortable to have to be the 8 year old mediator of that but there was also another occasion i think (maybe also at florida) where they were made at each other and i asked my mum if they were getting divorced and all she said was 'ask ur dad' like???? no sort of consolation to this child who thinks their parents hate each other nooo just petty 'ask him' and theres also been other times when they fight/ are mad and they dont feel the need to hide it from us so i felt quite anxious around my parents sometimes.

so ahnyway . yes. when i had just turned 13 my parents split up and it fucked me up in a multitude of ways. also i cant beleive i stopped being a proper kid at 13, like as soon as i turned a teenager life hit me like a fucking truck. so the context as to why they split is still kinda lost to me ngl but they didnt tell me much anyway since i was young but my mum basically said my dad didnt love her anymore and he wanted to separate. its kinda funny because leading up to this my dad had been sleeping in the living room for like a few weeks and there was on and off fighting i could hear and i basically thought they were fighting over me and that i was in trouble and it kinda used to keep me up coz i could hear loud voices when they thought i was asleep- which is probably the cause of why i get veryyyy mad and angry when i hear my mum at like 1 am downstairs when shes drinking and im trying to sleep, probably something ive internalised (is that the word?) and made me respond so strongly to those type of noises.

anywayyyyy yes i thought i was in trouble when they were actually just getting a divorce so ... yeah you can really tell i was young and didnt understand adult issues or really couldnt figure this out myself from all the arguing and him sleeping downstairs lmao. anyway my dad moved out and it was just me my mum and my brother now and at this point my brother wouldve been about to turn 18, so although still kinda shit, not really as affected my it as a 13 yo, just to keep in mind. so i was devastated obviously and my whole world was kinda shattered but i had to hold it together a bit, also i was sometimes my mothers own therapist having to say things like 'everything happens for a reason' 'itll get better' in response to her deteriorating mental health and her questions that would be really hard for me to answer like 'why did he leave' etc (bish im a child be there for me not wallow in ur own pity, u have ur whole life to sort this out youre an adult, im a 13 you and only months away from wanting to kms hun think of ur CHILD please) anyway this left me feeling like a burden if i were to share my mental state because when my mum shared her stuff she was burdening me (AGAIN i was 13 she is an adult) so that made me bottle a lot of things up also the fact that i had no one to share it with because she works as a nurse and now shes a single mother and so she works almost all hours of most days and i dont see her much, my brother was either working at this time or just didnt give enough of a shit about me to make sure i ate.

i went from being catered to for every meal because i didnt know how to cook to suddenly no one being there for me so i had to learn how to do it myself. needless to say that lead to a bunch of unhealthy eating habbits like eating the same things every day - frozen pizza, cheese toasties, i cant think of anything else probs because i didnt make anything else just ate chocolates or didnt eat breakfast coz i woke up at 2pm. just general unhealthyness both in substance and like how healthy that was for my head yk. also this is during the summer btw so it gave me the option to be incredibly depressed - im not saying that as an edgy teen thing to say im being 100% genuine i was very depressed like textbook style - not eating or overeating, not showering/ taking care of myself, extreme lack of energy and hated doing social things coz i had to put on a farce that i was okay meanwhile i couldnt wait to get into my bed and sleep the next day and a half away.

i very vividly remember at the start of the summer holiday my friend asked me if i wanted to go out and do something and i rememeber just crying at that because i had no reason to say no but i just didnt want to and felt like i couldnt do anything and so i lied and said i wasnt feeling well and then put my phone down and curled up in my bed and cried coz i was frustrated and upset and i couldnt really understand what was wrong with me and why i was Like This.

god i didnt take into account how tired i was and how late it is when i started this huh, this isnt even half of it, but i have obligations in the mornign, the last until uni or whatever so ill put this in my drafts and finsih it somethime. alrigtht it is 02:08 btw z_z. also ive just now decided im gonna re organise my tumblr so if this ends up being an actual blog thing i can navigate it easier by adding tags and such. anywau goodnight.

20:21 30/06/2021

MOTHERFOIUHIFIUDVMKCVKM V

MY LAPTOP SHUT DOWE IN THE MIDDLE OF THSAT SO ITS ALL GONE BASICALLY I WAS DEPRESSED BURTNOUT GIFTERD KID AND IT SUCKED YADDa YADDSZ ANYTWAY

so

23:01- well. yes earlier i wrote a little about the ages 13-16 and how they sucked but whatever it got deleted the more pertinent stuff happened in the last year or so anyway.

um yeah so i started the last year of highschool as a 16 year old with a fucked up brain and never having learned any study techniques or work ethic in the slightest. i took 3 uni-level courses only one i actually wanted to do, most people take 2 at most or even 1/0 but do other classes. honestly it fucking sucked this year for school but i scraped all passes so thank god for that. so i started the year quite optimistic, or as much as i could be and in all fairness the content of this year wasnt actually that bad considering i was doing 3 hard classes but corona really truly fucked everything up and by November i had mentally dropped out of my classes but of course i still had to go to them. i feel like im an oddly independent teen because ive never had a solid parental presence in a while, like i had to do a lot for myself and maybe i should thank myself for getting me through it all because i really did pull through.

my thoughts keep drifting from what im writing coz i wanna talk about different things and im just thinking maybe i shouldve just posted the last one then added a reblog when i could be bothered to write and not force myself because if theres ever a reoccurring theme in my life is that if i force myself to do anything i will hate it with my entire being, so maybe i should just do a short synopsis and write about something else afterwards.

so i took 3 hard classes, slowly lost all motivation because in jan it switches to online classes and i could Not deal with those it was horrible, and i became more of a "troublesome student" in one of my classes *cough* maths *cough* and almost got "kicked out" of taking the class just because the teacher was a control freak but like wanted to control all of our actions and behaviour, also i think i may have adhd and another kid in my class i think he does too and surprise surprise the teacher "dislikes" him too but its only a farce because he doesnt actually dislike him its only so that i cant call him out for singling me out when other students behave "badly" too. but anyways maybe ill come back to this in a while when i can be arsed explaining my complicated relationship with my parents.

the only reason i wanted to write this today was so that i could tag the post with like june 2021 or something and not june/july, but i might make another post later, Anyway happy end of pride month i supose, hope u figure it out me!

[strawberryspeachy]

I wonder if im about to get fired again

Last year i got fired because a teacher who acted like he wanted to be my friend hated when I reciprocated that want.

Ive worked with about 55 other teachers since him and none of them

Ask about my weekend every week. Ask about my friends. Ask about my personal life. Stare at me in the office. Lean over me and touch me. Come look through my folder that im holding to just point out the paper im looking for (they just offer me a new one if they think i dont have it)

But. I was totally stalking him. And got fired.

Now im working at 2 schools

One with 4/5 horrible teachers

The other with 4/5 wonderful teachers

At the horrible teacher school one has been (and i dont say this about people often. Actually ever. I assume ppl hate me... but this woman has bee - well)

K so i made a newsletter for the schools. The good school put it out for the students and that was that. The bad school told me i could distribute it. So i asked this teacher where

She took me into the hallway and showed me a board. She told me to put the papers on those walls. And then she gave me pins. So i did.

Then she told my company i put papers up without permission

Ive worn the same clothes to all 7 schools ive worked at plus two camps. Never got a complaint. Until now. She complained about my skirt and socks

She said in a fly away statement when i started that because were teachers we cant travel because of corona and must stay home - it irriated me because i clearly understood that she was telling me that i need to stay home when im not working. Fuck that! But i just agreed with her. Her first question after my summer break was “you had a long vacation, did you go anywhere”

She asked in a happy voice - pretending that was wanted to hear about something exciting. But. Bitch i have a good memory. I told her i mostly stayed home and only went to a nearby town.

K so like. Thing is. She knows im probably lying (cause im young and not from this country. No one would stay home for a month) so the way she responded was kinda pissed off that she cant prove me wrong or report me or anything - then in the middle of class she asked about my housemates

1) i have no control over them

2) your first question was already invasive and this is stupid

3) youve asked me a question that i cant answer correctly. If i say i dont know youll say i might have corona because my housemates probably brought it home. If i say they went out - same thing. If i say they stayed home - another obvious lie. I told her that they are all students and had class so I think they were home. Again. She was annoyed by this answer

She constantly makes side remarks about “foregners”

She wont translate the questions that students ask her to ask me - and when i understand them and answer she acts flustered and annoyed

Shes bad at english and writes shit incorrectly - gives it to me to cold read - then gets mad when i trip over shit thats written incorrectly

She changed the song early last month because I liked it

She talks to me like im a clown hindering the class - walking over and telling me (a person standing quietly waiting for instruction) that now the students must study - the way a parent would tell a 7 year old not to bother the sleeping dog.

I TRIED to have a normal conversation with her because she seemed to be trying and i felt bad. She said it was hot and cold off and on and told me what temperature it would he the next day in celcius. I just said oh. And felt the tention. So i tried to ease it by chuckling and telling her “sorry. You know how america uses Fahrenheit? I dont really understand celcius.” She immediately —- wait hold on

This school makes us write down our temperature in the morning as though that does ANYTHING to stop corona - they dont even check - she harrassed me upon walking in the door to WRITE DOWN MY TEMPERATURE

—- k so no. No easy conversation. She immediately got serious and went how do you understand celcius for your body temperate then??? I told her i convert it.

A couple periods late she inturrupted another teacher talking to me about class and stopped me from going to class to ask me ‘if you dont know celcius how do you write your temperature down in the morning?!?’’ I told her i have a japanese thermometer and just write down what it says. Then she tried to play if off and chuckled like - oh ha i was just wondering. Whats the difference (her face was like enraged before that btw) she asked what the average temperature in Fahrenheit is and i quickly spit out 98.6 while grabbing my book to leave for the class i was now running late for

Shes full on feuding with a boy who “CANT SPEAK JAPANESE” and is “NOT JAPANESE” she tried not to bitch but also bitch about him to me - through this i learned that his mom is Australian. He was born in Japan. Also if her english didnt suck so much she would know that hes not fluent in english

She like the other teachers ask me questions that they dont want answers to. And sometimes is not even just - i wanna write this sentence wrong - does it make sense

No. It doesnt (correct answer- anything you write is correct. Dont worry. Dont ask me. Your perfect)

A couple weeks ago she told me that the song the other teacher chose is a japanese song that was translated into english. She asked it its gramattically correct. I told her that songs dont need to be grammatically correct so its fine. Then she asked me if it makes sense. I told her that its a bit vague but its fine.

She didnt know what vague meant. She asked me to write it down so she could look it up later. Not sure how she took that as an insult but Im sure she did.

And the song is vague. Id figured out that it was a song that was either written for a weird tv show or translated from something else before she even told me

Shes always late for class. She doesnt even leave for class until the bell rings. If she walks in and i was talking with the students - she looks highly uncomfortable - so ive stopped talking to them before she arrives

She wont let them ask me questions. Only her (these past two points go for the other crappy teachers too)

She cant make up her mind whether she wants me to say hello first or her. She cant make up her mind on what she wants me to read or whether she wants me to stop at commas or read full paragraphs or what - and she gets annoyed when i cant read her mind avout it —the others do this too

She reads sentences she wrote (incorrectly) out loud even more wrong - but apparently (going from her face) even though she doesnt know the word for fucking SENTENCES - and calls them “englishes” she heard me add the s to a word that should have been plural but she wrote as singular. She never says the fucking plurals or adds them where they shouldnt - but of course she heard my quick slip of adding an s onto a fucking word

- which really just shows thats she pays way more attention trying to find me doing something wrong than literally ANYTHING ELSE she does

Theres more. Im tired. And so very stressed. Tomorrow i have a meeting after school which i told my company rhat if they want my time they should pay me for it and told them theyre welcome to come to my schools (the one i like and normally can he stress free and get home early from) station

They made up bs as to why they can pay others but not me but did say theyre gonna come to the station

Last tome with the fucking “hanging stuff up without permission” i was of couse told i was in the wrong (BECAUSE JAPANESE CAN DO NO WRONG) and forced to say that i need to communicate better 3 times

Howd i start this? Watch me get fired? Yea i was fired on like the 23rd last year. Watch me get fucking fired again - for again. One racist ass peice of shit teacher

“Well you just gotta suck it up and accept where you are on the food chain” k look. Do you know how much easier and less stressed id be if i was able to do that?! I just. CANT ok. I refuse to think that i am less of a person than any other person. People can treat me that wat and do all they want. But i refuse to think that i am lesser. I am a person. And if i have to respect them they should respect me. Its a reciprocal fucking thing i cant fucking kiss ass

I lived in a house with a woman who wanted me to kiss her ass - and i basically chose not to be treated like a dormat and pike she was my lord. And thus got mentally and emptionally abused for 24 years.

I cant fucking kiss ass. I can be polite. But i cant kiss fucking ass dude. I just cant

[isekaisyouwithmyforearmlaser]

i just read tobys tweet explaining things in deltarune, and here are my thoughts.

spoilers for deltarune

1) deltarune isnt undertale, and it isnt related in anyway (ie. if you did a pacifist route and had a good ending in UNDERTALE, those characters in that universe are still happy.) its neither a prequel, sequel, or reset as many have theorized. its its own thing. it just... is. i like that.

i like the idea that this is just a different scenario/set up for the characters seen thru a new lens, while still staying somewhat true to their character (fishy things, such as alphys hating mew mew 1, seemed to point to a reset of some sort, but shes still the same in that shes nervous a lot and can go into long tangents about her interests.)

this idea makes it easier to make deltarune a separate thing, as toby said later in the tweet that he cant bring you the same feeling you had in undertale, but he will instead give you a new game that will give you new feelings.

but since the story isnt released, i have no idea how far or deep it goes- it seems that chara (now kris) is mostly still chara (still kris) and im happy the story has him as the main character. i think its an interesting contrast from frisk and undertale, much more suspenseful and takes on darker themes. (no im not going to discuss gaster lol)

2. toby seemed to have a lot of reprehension of the games battle system. i thought it was great and fun, the bullet dodging making it active more so than most rpgs, and the idea that blocking creates more TP in battle rather than TP being a distinguishable thing that you deplete and often cant restore until later, this was also a great idea. also the left over TP becomes more money. you cant lose in this scenario.

doing pacifist route (though this phrase itself means just that: not hurting enemies. nothing changes.) i found this to be an extremely fun and useful mechanic when used correctly. for ex (SPOILER) when fighting jevil, where i suck at dodging his bullet patterns cause i havent really figured them out yet, having kris ACT while suzy and ralsei blocked made it so that when they got hurt, i could have ralsei heal them, and could continue playing. it made it very tense too, having to manage and know where your TP percentage is at all times.

i believe that while the battle system could be improved on, (perhaps more interactive ACTS like rearranging block man, or blowing on bunnies. more gear [it was a demo so there will obviously be more], idk. im not a dev im an art major.), it isnt inherently flawed. it is just that: a demo. a thought or concept that can be flushed out more.

i also loved the style of fight sequences, the flashiness of attacking and ACTing, and seeing characters interact with eachother in battle. it really was something i loved and will remember!

3) the in game bullet dodging, outside of battle sequences. this made walking around the world be more than walking around the world. i thought it did a great job at solidifying the concept of the soul/heart, and it was fun maneuvering around them. i love dodging bullets lol. i can see this becoming a big part of the game.

4) Puzzles. toby admitted that some things were lack luster compared to others, but i wouldnt necessarily say that grandeur = to value of its function. puzzles and their concepts repeated themselves, such as the symbol puzzle and button puzzles. the one exception being the eye puzzle. i thing that while these were simple, i had fun going through them. sure, they were easy (for the most part, getting the key was a pain in the ass 4 me cause i kept fucking up the door order). all in all, the puzzles were fun, but not an focal point in the game (Demo, btw.) im sure that when toby does bring puzzles into the next chapters, they'll play a bigger role. that brings me to

3.5) i added this after cause i remembered it but didnt want to change all the numbers cause lazy .... so.

NO multiple endings

this makes sense as it would take a long time to create multiple endings given everything else thats on the plate this time. im not disappointed or sad, i simply understand. it IS a different game, and i think it will be important to the lore (your choices dont matter).

also, like toby said, most games are already like this. i welcome it.

4) the development for the next chapters.

Toby making a game as great as undertale (i never played it but watched a walkthrough, an understood the plot as most of my friends loved it) by himself for the most part, with help from Temmie (of course!) and as well as help with the art, its an incredible feat. no wonder the whole theme of the game was determination. that being said, deltarune is an incredibly ambitious game, even more so than undertale, and it seems that hes had it in the vaults of his mind for a long time. maybe even before undertale.

it makes sense that a game of this scope will take much longer to create. with a much more complicated party system, battle system, increase in pixel art quality, more dynamic fight sequences and UI as well as like, a thousand things im forgetting, its a fucking miracle he had the determination to create and finish that. (if only i could start having that much motivation sadface).

i look forward to what he has in store for us, and i will be patient until then, considering these things take time, and toby is a human, depsite what people believe. many do have high expectations of him, but i think so long as he remembers this is about him giving his ideas and stories to the world, he'll be okay (hopefully).

5) the team

im not sure how, when, what, or uh whomst it will be obviously. point 7 was really funny. i think that toby wont have a hard time finding people wanting to work with him and on the team, but i think it will be difficult to find people who are motivated and determined enough.

6) last thoughts

i think that the world with darkeners being seperate from kris' real world is a very interesting and cool thing! it makes you wonder if its real or not. i think this will make future chapters SUPER interesting, seeing if actions in the darkener world change things in the lightener world? how it will play into the plot in the lightener world will be interesting.

also, asriel is alive in this game. hes in university, so hes an adult. im scared that something bad will happen to him and kris in the future. but also, theyre both alive! yay! i wonder if we'll see of hear about frisk again, either way i love it.

and last, the ending. what can i say? its like, really vague. i think the contrast between asriel and kris will be a big conflict in this game- asriels side of the room being filled with trophies and personal items, while kris' is empty excluding the mysterious birdcage. people in town bringing up and talking about their wonderful memories with asriel in the past, but im not sure if this is relevant or just toby letting us get more of an idea of his role. all in all he seems very loved and popular, while kris is... something else. i dont know what yet. i hope he gets a happy ending though.

and he seems like he was possessed, or not wholly himself at the end. his snappy walk and dragging himself was very unlike what we've seen throughout the game. i dont know what this means, if its more like his true nature or something else. did he know about his soul/heart before the events of the game? does he do this often, as at the beginning the desription of the birdcage and wagon depicted itcas heavily used? why the hell does he have a whole ass knife? he gonna kill someone?

also i think kris is in early highschool/late middleschool as his classmates seem to be working around town. i dont know what the work age there is tho. el oh el

all in all, i really wish him luck, i was SUPER, ULTRA satisfied with deltarune chap 1, and i cant wait to see what happens in the future. also, i loved the music