#btw!!!!! any tips welcome i had such a hard time with both hairs and the beard

[the-piano]

Diavlo and Furi

A remake !

Yay

[etherealluminescence]

helloo! can i request the brother with a virgin mc who’s really nervous when they get intimate because she’s scared she cant pleasure them? you can make it nsfw if you want. btw i really like your writing! i hope you have a good day 😊

Hello anon! Thanks for asking, I’ll be making this one nsfw! It’s pretty long since I included smut scenarios at the bottom of each, and as an opening to each hc! Just skip the italics if you don��t like nsfw or feel free to skip this whole thing if it’s not your style, random tumblr user ✨ And thank you I hope you have a good day too anon 🥺🥺

I’m such a kinky person who had to include tail fucking by levi even if no one agrees that is his kink and no one can tell me otherwise.

Brothers react to a f!virgin!MC (NSFW)

Lucifer

Quiet moans filled the air as Lucifer began undressing you. Taking off your blouse, he cupped your left breast through the cloth of your bra, eliciting a yelp from your slightly swollen lips. Slowly, he etched his hand down to your core, rubbing it.

Before he could continue, however, you let out little sobs. You thought you were ready for this, but could you really do it? You were a virgin and judging from his height he’s probably as giant down there as his ego is.

Would you even be enough for him? There’s no way, right? What if he wants you to do something? Are you just going to ruin the mood?

Confused, Lucifer immediately stops his actions and tries to console you. Did he do something wrong? Was he pressuring you into this? Did you not actually want him?

Covering your face with your hands, you tell him that you’re actually a virgin, and don’t know what you should be doing. Would he even be satisfied with you?”

“MC, darling, show me your face.” This was not a command, it was a request. He wanted you to look him in the eyes when he talks to you.

Bringing your arms down, you look up at him and start to cry a bit more. Was he going to berate you?

“We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to, okay? I assure you, I want to do this with you, you are more than enough to satisfy me. And all you need to do is let me hear that beautiful voice of yours.”

Now a crying and blushing mess, you bring your head up to give him a quick peck on the lips, a sign telling him you want to continue.

Deepening the kiss, Lucifer easily starts the mood back up again. Kissing, biting, and sucking all over your neck down between your breasts. Dark purple hickies covered your body by the time he was finished. Somewhere along the lines of him biting and sucking, he had managed to discard your undergarments.

His finger slowly entered you as you stifle in a moan. As he fingered you, he gradually let you get used to it before adding a second, then third, and even a fourth. The sensation was so foreign to you, but oh so very welcomed. Clenching around his fingers, you let out a small cry that it feels weird, as your sticky fluids coat his fingers and trickle down your thighs.

Smiling down at you, he removes his fingers and licks them clean before kissing you and letting you taste a bit of yourself. “You’re doing perfect, what was there ever to worry about, love?”

Mammon

“Of course the human wants to do it with me, who wouldn’t?” Mammon semi-yelled in an attempt to cover his embarrassment. Taking both your hands in one of his, he slowly lowered you down on his bed as he gave you a kiss.

Before he could do anymore, you brought your knees up and told him to wait. He was sort of offended and embarrassed, but decided to listen to what you had to say.

“Im-a-virgin-please-be-gentle-with-me-and-don’t-make-fun-of-me-I-don’t-know-what-to-do-or-how-to-pleasure-you.” you very quickly said before burying your face inside of his pillows beside you.

“What was that MC? You gotta say it slower! Slower! Ya know?” Mammon responded. Truthfully, he heard you clearly the first time, but he just wanted to hear you say it again, but slower, and let him soak in the glory of this.

Taking your face out of the pillow, you looked up at Mammon and repeated yourself. “I’m a virgin, Mammon. I don’t know how this works or how to pleasure you, but please, be gentle with me.”

Seeing his sly smile, you wanted to die. He did it on purpose, didn’t he? Before you could hide yourself from reality again, he pulls you into a deep kiss. “I’m gonna tell everyone the Great Mammon was your first in everything!”

“Ma- mpf!” You were cut off by another kiss. Turning you around, Mammon propped your ass into the air and gave it a small spank making you squeal. Today, he’ll let his little human be, and work hard for them.

Ripping off your pants and underwear, he pushed his fingers into your ass and began to slowly push in and out. His other hand worked at stroking himself, telling you to watch so you know how to do it next time, because you will be giving him a blowjob eventually.

Climaxing on his fingers, he pushed them into your mouth and told you to suck. You ate every last bit of it as if it were the tastiest substance. Pulling his fingers in your ass out, and pushed his length in, causing you to cry from the size. “You were that hungry for my cum MC~? Get ready.” That cocky son of a bitch.

Leviathan

Loud moans from the both of you echoed throughout the room. Levi’s hands were roaming your upper half while his tailed worked on getting rid of your lower half’s clothing. But just as he got to taking off your underwear.

You didn’t mean to, but you started to cry. You were shaking. You just couldn’t control it anymore, out of everyone, you figure Levi would be a virgin and not know what to do like you. But you underestimated how many eroge games he plays.

Startled, Levi was trying his best to function. Why were you crying?? Did you not want a yucky otaku like human? Did you not like him? Did you agree to date him for a few months out of pure pity and suddenly want to get rid of him?

Trying your best to calm yourself, for both your’s and Levi’s sakes, you let out a shaky breath and explain to him what you’re feeling. The gears in his head are finally shifting.

“You mean a beautiful and amazing person like you is a v-virgin?” Levi asks, unsure if he’s hearing it right or if you’re making an excuse.

Repeating yourself, this boy was ecstatic. It was the complete opposite of what you thought was going to happen. You mean he gets to be your first?? And otaku that likes to watch idols and plays video games 17 hours a day actually gets to be YOUR first time?

Levi was amazingly happy and even expressed that very loudly. His little tail was wagging. You couldn’t help but laugh at his reaction, soon enough forgetting your own worries.

Levi told you not to worry. Although he’s also a virgin, he’s played plenty of eroge games and seen enough hentai to know what to do!!

Spreading your thighs, Levi inches closer until you could feel his hot breath hovering over your clit. Using his tail, he pushed it into your mouth, causing you to moan in shock. As his tail began fucking your mouth, he began working on eating you out.

With one of his fingers, he reached up and began to pinch one of you buds while keeping up the pace. All of this was extremely stimulating for you, a virgin. Two of your holes were being filled and your breasts were also getting attention. Pressing your thighs against his face, you began to smush him as you got closer to your edge, which only excited him even further.

As he pulled out of your mouth, you climaxed and dug your hands into his back, leaving scratch marks. However, the night was still young and just one climax wasn’t enough. There’s a reason he was fucking your mouth, as he shoved his tail into your ass and pushed his length into you.

Satan

Swallowing, you look up at Satan to try and gauge what on earth you should do. Taking his length into your hands, you slowly began to rub and stroke, as best you knew how.

At that point, it was obvious. You couldn’t fake it. You were shaking, you looked confused, and you clearly did not know how to give a blowjob.

Satan was first to speak up between the awkward silence you two shared. Your boyfriend wasn’t going to judge you, but he wasn’t going to get off this way either.

“Do you, perhaps not you know, know how?” It was definitely awkward. The two of you were inwardly cringing. Sex wasn’t something you two often talked about, or well, ever talked about. You never thought about having sex with anyone in general.

Quickly, you responded with a little “no”.

He isn’t judgemental, he could predict it from the fact you would close your eyes if two people held hands in a movie calling it “lewd” and unforgivable. He thought it was a human joke at first, with Solomon saying that too, but the blush on your face was way too strong for it to be a dedicated joke.

Satan takes liberty to guiding your hands over the sensitive parts, and the general parts, telling you how and where to touch and suck.

While he’s explaining, he’s also boasting his knowledge of dick anatomy.

Placing your hands on his hips, you began to lick the tip of his dick before moving to the underside, making sure to give it all the attention it deserved. You soon took a third of him in, your limit, and used your hands to stroke the remaining parts.

Groaning, he entangled his fingers into your hair and began to accidentally choke you against him. Little tears were forming in your eyes, but if felt damn good to have his thick member filling you up, as you listen to hear his groans that you made.

Climaxing without warning, his hot bitter seed filled your mouth. You nearly gagged it out, but swallowed it whole in order to try your best to pleasure him. Patting your head, Satan tells you that you were amazing, and a very quick learner.

Asmodeous

“How about we have some fun, darling?” Asmodeous whispered into your ear before biting it as he wrapped his around you from behind. His hands began to slowly fondle your breasts, but before he could any further.

You knew this day was coming. Asmodeous was the demon of lust, and he was your boyfriend. A very amazing boyfriend who held back on his lust and stayed loyal to you meaning he’s been sex deprived for months. It was finally time, or you might accidentally kill him.

You were more than willing to help your boyfriend, you really were, but you were also scared. He’s been with probably thousands of people by now- he’s probably a thousand and slept with a hundred thousand! How could you, a virgin, satisfy the master of fucking?

But only because he is the master of fucking, he could tell you were uneasy. He tried to avoid making too many moves on you, other than flirting, because he would just know you were feeling nervous, but he couldn’t understand why. He knows he’s beautiful but you don’t have to be so worried to see him nude?

Asmo began to stroke your back and slowly backed down, he could wait until you were ready. But you however, had made up your mind. You were terrified, you knew you wouldn’t be as good as him or the other succubusses who were literally born to fuck, but you wouldn’t want him to be horny and be unable to do anything about it because he loves you.

Grabbing his hand, you turned around and looked up into his eyes, and swallowed putting on a brave face. “Asmo... I’m a virgin, and I’m not sure if I could pleasure you, but if you would, please take care of me.” You started off strong but slowly began to mutter, blushing wildly.

Asmo was incredibly happy. You mean his darling MC is a virgin;; like his girlfriend was worried about pleasuring him and wants to be fucked by him?? And only him?? Ever?

He literally forgets he was trying to get the sick and begins to squeal. He’s holding your hands and telling you words of encouragement and that you’re the only one for him, and that he will teach you exactly what to do.

Groping your ass, he gave it a rough squeeze as you yelped. Taking advantage of the situation he shoved his tongue into your mouth and easily claimed dominance. Swirling his tongue around, he made sure to taste all of your mouth. You’re his.

“That’s just the basics on how to get a quick kiss~” he teased as he started to nibble on your neck. His left hand was already under your panty, fingering you, while his right was massaging your breast. Your small whimpers and mewls only encouraged him to continue and do more.

He knows he should only do so much while you’re a virgin and probably don’t have a high enough stamina yet, but damn were you sexy as fuck. You on the other hand, were drowning in pleasure as he sucked and bit your buds and was pushing even more fingers deeper inside you, hitting your g-spot.

Beelzebub

Beel’s big figure dominated you as he pinned you down underneath him on his bed. You had always know he was tall and well sculpted, but being this close and intimate with him, you were having second thoughts.

“You’re so pretty, MC.” Beel whispered as he gently kissed you on the lips, as if going any harder would cause you some kind of harm.

Ah, of course he was gentle. He always was. It sort of made you feel bad, and even conflicted for having thoughts of being scared. But hearing him unzip his pants, and looking at his dick brought you back into reality.

There’s was no way it was going to fit. Your two hands could not wrap around that. Your mouth could not fit more than a third of that, even on a good day. How are you going to pleasure him or have sex if you can’t even fit him?

Beel was always watching you, so he could immediately tell you’re uneasy. And he immediately began to tell you not to worry, and it’s okay. And that he will stop and go get snacks for you if you want to stop right now.

It caused you to cry. He’s just so sweet, how did you land the greatest and softest boyfriend in the history of the world?

He wasn’t sure what to do so he went to his dresser and pulled out a bag of chips and offered it to you. Seeing Beel so worried and concerned made you feel a lot better.

“I’m fine, Beel. I just really love you, but I’m a virgin. I’m not sure if I could fit you, or well.. pleasure you. I’m sorry, it’s stupid.” You ended up telling him.

Did you think he was just going to go put it in without prep work?? Of course not! You silly goose, he was going to prep the life out of you. And him. Don’t worry. You probably won’t even be able to go all the way today.

“Oh.” Well now you learned about what prepping was. And you thanked whoever came up with that idea.

Bringing your thighs into his shoulders, he pulled your panties down and pushed his tongue into you, and started to swirl. One of his hands was covered in lube, working on himself, while the other was working on your ass.

Going deeper and deeper, you let out small whimpers that gradually grew into loud moans. Your body was no longer in your control, and the only thing in your mind was now your desires.

Climaxing for the first time, Beel didn’t even bother to stop. He ate you up like his favorite meal and continued to work on you, pulling his fingers out of your ass to give it a light smack before continuing his work. “One day, we’ll get to the full course, but let’s enjoy this first.”

Belphegor

“You’re such a good girl.” He whispered pulling you closer towards him. As he took off your shirt and bra, he gave your nipple a quick pinch before starting, causing you to yelp in surprise.

You honestly had no clue what you were doing. You knew you were being intimate with Belphie, but how did you get to this point? One second you two were cuddling, and the next he asks you to help with his hard on.

You didn’t realize there was so much to the bedroom world. There were different positions? Styles? Ways of pleasuring people? What on earth is a breastjob? Is that like plastic surgery?

Before you could say anything, Belphie could already see you shaking. Hell, you were shaking more than the time he kind of killed you.

He already had his suspicions that you had no idea how this worked, but is that really something to be scared about? He didn’t get it.

Sighing, he tried his best to tell you how it works. He didn’t want to embarrass you by making you say that you’re a virgin allowed, so in a way, he was being nice.

“Put your hands on my dick and suck. Afterwards pull out and put your breasts against it. It would kill you if we did it raw.”

Blushing, you stared at him with wide eyes. So he could already tell you’re a virgin, huh? Was it really that obvious? But before you had time to express your inexperience, and how it was obvious, Belphie unbuckled his pants and removed his boxers. He just wanted his hard on gone, not a therapy session.

Thanks, Belphie. You tried to be nice in your own way.

Letting saliva form in your mouth for a bit, you bring your face closer to his length as you open and start to suck. Belphie’s hands entangled themselves in your locks, guiding you on how to slowly bob, and when to stop.

As you removed yourself from him, he gripped you by the hips and pushed you forward, your breasts against his lower half. Parting your breasts, you push him all the way inbetween, before slowing starting to move up and down.

With the help of Belphie, you gained a steady pace and gradually began bounding on your own. His low groans encouraged you and you went as best you could. With him no longer needing to guide you, he began to squeeze and roll your nipples between his fingers, causing you to cry out in ecstasy as well.

[t-lostinworlds]

Lost You (Shawn Mendes) [2]

Feat. Tom Holland

A/N: This took way too long and I am really sorry for the wait. Also, this got a bit long too aha. The song btw is Unloving You by Alex Aiono check him out you guys he’s really talented, so yeah give that a listen because the performance is kindaa based on the song. Anyhow, I hope you guys still like this one!

Summary: After seeing your performance on a song you wrote about him, Shawn went out to get some air, but his peace was quickly interrupted when Tom decided to follow and confront him

Warnings: a sprinkle of Angst and typos

Word Count: 6.4k+

Masterlist in Bio

-:-:-:-:-

You are very grateful that your dressing room has a bathroom in it, that was the purpose as to why you got out of your seat in the first place.

Your stylist was kind enough to help you out of your dress quickly and into your performance dress, a more comfortable and movable one before you got into the bathroom to empty your bladder.

Tom was being all blushy and cute while you got changed, covering his eyes with both hands and never peeking as promised, making you giggle in midst of your current mix of emotions after what happened with... Shawn.

The dress you wore was pale pink with a long, A-line bottom and a v-neckline to match a low back. The whole dress was covered in lace that extends into cap sleeves with petal appliqués littered all across, giving you an almost, fairy-like type of feel.

You wore close to no make-up now, hair down to frame your face, with your feet all bare, the rawness of your features critical for the song you were going to sing.

You wanted it to be intimate, real and emotional. Not much big production, just pure and simple you on stage, nothing but the beautiful sound of the piano and a few ballet dancers to tell a story.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Tom asked again the moment you reached the couch. Plopping yourself beside him, you nodded with a sigh. "Yeah just, seeing him brought back memories."

Tom frowned at your words, arm extending as he draped it over your shoulder, hand rubbing your arm in comfort. "What'd he say to you?"

You shrugged at his question, fingers picking at your dress as you softly mumbled. "That he still loves me and that he wants to get back together."

"And?"

"No, gosh no. I can't go back to what it once was. I couldn't even if I tried. And I really don't want to because every time I look at him I just see... pain." You shook your head with a frown of your own, hurt spreading inside you as the tainted memories replayed itself inside your head.

"Do you still love him?"

You took a sharp, deep breath at the question, two sides of yourself going against each other as to what you feel about that certain boy. "I don't know." You admitted with a defeated sigh, your mind a mess a long with your heart that you couldn't exactly give Tom a straight answer.

Maybe there's still a part of you that loves him, the Shawn you once knew at least, but that always seems to get clouded by the Shawn you saw just minutes ago. The familiarity in the way he looks at you, the glint in his eyes, it was still there, but barely. You saw a very different person from the boy who you fell in love with, because all you saw was the person who broke your heart into pieces.

"Okay, let's change the subject because the crinkle on your forehead is back, you need to clear your mind and relax. You're performing in a few darling." Tom pressed his pointer finger on the space between your brows, smoothing out the wrinkle with a reassuring smile that you couldn't help but feel all warm.

You looked up at him with a small, genuine but guilty smile. "Thank you and I'm sorr—"

"No need for that love. I've promised you that I'll always be here whenever you need me, and I tend to keep my promises. And before you start, no, you're not being a burden nor are you leading me on. I'm a grown man; I make my own choices, and am aware of the consequences. And as I've said plenty of times before, I am willing to wait for you whenever you are ready." Tom gave your arm a gentle squeeze, eyes boring into yours as it showed nothing but pure genuineness.

You felt your heart melt at the seams at his words, so grateful to have someone be at your side in time of need and one who actually cares about you wholeheartedly.

You are aware of a certain feeling that courses through you whenever you're with Tom. As to what it is? You haven't figured it out completely yet. This just makes things now more complicated than you thought it would be, adding the whole Shawn thing.

Tom and you have talked about what he felt for you, and you've also told him that he's free to find another as you are not sure as to when your heart gets fully healed. You don't want to use him as rebound at all, nor do you want to hold him down, that's why you've never told him anything that'd give him too much hope or anything, feelings wise, that you weren't sure yourself. You've been blunt and honest with him from the start, completely transparent without any sugar coating, but still, he understands and is still willing to wait.

With a simple explanation that you're not exactly ready yet, that you need to focus on yourself and be the person who you're meant to be, Tom understood. He always did, he's just incredible like that.

Pushing yourself up slowly, you placed a soft and sweet kiss on Tom's cheek, the simple action catching him off-guard as you felt his breath slightly hitch. You pulled away to look at him fully, face only an inch apart that you could make out the swirls of his beautiful brown eyes, the tips of your noses almost touching and you couldn't miss the way you felt your heart skipped a beat.

"You are such an amazing person, have I told that?" You whispered softly, Tom's eyes glancing down for a second to catch a glimpse of your lips before they were quick to be back on yours. It was a fast peek, but you caught it nonetheless.

He didn't take it further though, knowing that he can't do that to you right now, especially with what's going on inside your head. You saw it in his eyes, he knew it just wasn't the right time, and you were thankful.

Tom only chuckled with a nod, a soft blush coating his cheeks as he shot you a sweet but playful grin. "Yes, you have told me that, countless times, but I don't get tired of hearing it though."

You rolled your eyes with a laugh, swatting his chest playfully to which he purposely yelped a little too loudly. All overdramatic and everything. "That wasn't even that hard!" You exclaimed with giggles of your own.

"It still hurts love." He pouted at you, rubbing his chest exaggeratedly just for the purpose to sell his act. "I thought you had super strength Spider-Man? Unless you're a fraud." You accused as you narrowed your eyes at him, Tom gasping in feign offense.

"Hey!"

Both of you continued to banter back and forth, giggles and laughs echoing around the space until it was cut off when you were finally called to stage.

***

"Please help me welcome to the stage, your best new artist, Y/N L/N!"

Shawn's head snapped back at the stage once he heard your name. He'd been seating all angsty the moment he got back from meeting you in the hallway. He has been silent the rest of the night unless someone acknowledged him, but otherwise, he kept still and quiet, just waiting for you to appear on stage.

He was a complete and utter mess, but nothing a few fake smiles can't hide. Having done this before, all the eyes and the cameras lurking about, he was getting good at masking his feelings.

The lights started to dim as the applause faded out, the whole arena eerily quiet until a single spotlight shown right at the very back of the stage. And there you were, standing in all your raw and breathtaking beauty that Shawn has ever seen you in.

"I wish I could unsay the words I said..." Your voice echoed throughout the whole place, the sound sending shivers down Shawn's spine as it's been so long since the last time he heard you sing in person.

Then the melody of the piano came rolling in, the music just as beautiful to match your voice.

I wish I could unsee the videos in my head And if I could untie the knot and unhear the promises that you forgot Would I do that? Would I?

Shawn's heart ached at that. He knew what this song was about, from the very first moment you released it, he knew it was about him. The pain, the hurt and regret in your voice was clear as day and it took a big swing at his heart.

Movement on the stage snapped him back to reality as you walked forward ever so slowly. You looked like an angel to him, glowing right in the middle of the stage, your dress flowing with every step giving the illusion of you floating in mid-air.

The moment you reached a space another spotlight lit up, illuminating a few dancers acting out as couples as they move beautifully in sync with the song, so much raw emotion in one stage.

Unloving you, is the hardest thing to do Wish I could find a way to be unlove with you Unloving you, you're all I wanna lose But every night I'm closer to the bitter truth I just can't unlove you Maybe I can't unlove you

Shawn understood the lyrics clear as day, he's heard this song more times than he should, but he tried his best to not hold out hope, because he knows you. He knows you can never release a very personal song unless... unless it doesn't hurt you that much anymore. And if you were able to sing this live, then that can only mean one thing.

Maybe you've written the song right after everything. Just pouring every pain and suffering he caused you into lyrics and melodies to help you heal, and maybe by writing this song, you have healed, and releasing it to the world just means it doesn't hurt to revisit it anymore. It means that you've probably moved on, and that only leaves Shawn even more broken that he already is.

I wish I could unfeel your skin I wish I could undrown these feelings and learn to swim Oh if I could unlock the gate and unlight the fire that you put in me Would I do that? Would I?

The couples were now surrounding you, all acting out mundane things like slow dancing, reading books, one even had a mixing bowl in hand as they laughed, but the one that stuck out the most to Shawn was the couple sitting right in the corner, on a picnic blanket, the guy who oddly looked like him, holding a guitar in his hands.

It was way too familiar that Shawn felt his heart sink.

The first time I told her I love her.

Tears started to prick at Shawn's eyes as realization hit him like a truck. What the couples on stage were doing, it was the things you two always did when you were still together. Every single one of it, from making a mess in the kitchen to you reading him stories in bed.

He felt his chest slowly tighten, his body all tense as his mind ran a hundred miles per minute, just thinking about all the beautiful memories that now were tainted, all the blissful things that once was and might never get to experience again. All because of what he did.

Shawn stared right at you as you finished off the last chorus, the lights that were casted upon the couples started dimming one by one, almost serving as a sign that those memories, they were flickering, disappearing into nothing.

Unloving you, is the hardest thing to do Wish I could find a way to be unlove with you

Then the whole stage just burst to life, all dancers now moving in complete sync as you poured your heart and soul into the last beat.

Unloving you, you're all I wanna lose But every night I'm closer to the bitter truth I just can't unlove you

"But someday I will unlove you..." Everything then turned dark, the only light was yours as you stood there, right in the middle of the stage with a proud yet relieved smile.

The whole arena erupted into applause but the only thing Shawn could hear was the sharp ringing in his ears.

That's was it.

That last lyric change was all it took for Shawn to get up his seat and rush out. It may have looked bad if someone caught him, but hell, it would've look even worse if the camera caught him close to tears and unable to breath.

He just needed some air.

***

Shawn didn't know exactly how but he managed to find an empty lot at the very back of the arena, no signs of life so far. Big trucks were parked all around, hiding him some more from any prying eyes that could be lurking by.

He shut his own eyes tight as he threw his head back, the breeze of fresh air cool against his face as he took in as much as he could to try and calm himself down. His mind was still so crowded, so many thoughts rushing in and out of his brain at high speed and he couldn't quite grasp what was real and what was not.

Shawn thought he was okay, that he was good after the break up. He admits, he made the choice, he wasn't fully heartbroken when he did what he did. But as time went by, it slowly started to creep on him, all the pain and sorrow, and when he saw you tonight? That's when everything finally hit, a tidal wave of regret, guilt and hurt, all in one big swoop.

Shawn shook his head as he opened his eyes, now staring straight up at the dark night sky. There was no sound aside from the muffled screaming from inside, the premise somewhat, peaceful in a sense. He took in the calmness of everything around him, and slowly Shawn felt his heart rate go down, breathing going steady as he tried his best to clear his head, just counting the stars that he could see through the blaring lights of the place.

It was going great so far, that until he heard the door he came out of open and then close.

Turning around, he was filled with confusion and pure surprise as the person in front of him was the last who Shawn expected to see. He didn't ever expect to see him at all in pure honesty. Out of the number of persons who could've seen him run out, out of all the people who could've followed him, it had to be Tom Holland himself, how funny.

"If you came here to gloat—"

"No, I came here to give you a word of advice." Tom stood there with his hands in his pockets, a solemn look on his face to which Shawn only responded with furrowed brows. "I don't need your advice." He grumbled.

"I think it's best if you stay away from her." Tom ignored Shawn's comment as he added, voice stern and laced with pure warning, making Shawn scoff as he crossed his arms over his puffed out chest, all tall and confident. The Canadian boy wasn't scared of the British lad that's for sure. "And you expect me to listen to you?"

Tom shook his head. "No, I don't, but for her sake? I know you will." When Shawn didn't say a word, Tom continued, taking one step forward towards him to try and get the point across. "You claim that you care about her right? Then if that really is true, you need to let her go and let her be happy. You owe that to her."

Shawn let's out a mocking laugh, gesturing towards all of Tom as he sneered. "What, with you?"

The lad shook his head with a disappointed chuckle, arms falling limp to his side as if he can't actually believe that this is the card Shawn decided to play. "You're not getting the point here mate."

"No! You're not getting the point. I still love her, and I'm not going to give up until I get her back. I will keep fighting for her no matter the cost." Shawn wasn't one to have temper, he tends to have good control over it in most days, but right now, he couldn't feel anything else aside from anger and utter annoyance.

Sure, Shawn doesn't know Tom fully well, but he already doesn't like him. Maybe it was his ego talking, or maybe it's because Tom was with you but in Shawn's mind? How dare this guy tell him what to do?

Tom's patience was also starting to waver, the thought of you hurting and broken because of what this bastard did and continues to do was enough for Tom to not like Shawn, and he was going to make sure he hears what he has to say. "Do you want to get back with her because you truly love her? Or is it because it hurts your ego to see her with someone else and you just can't have that?"

Shawn blinked as Tom's words echoed inside his mind. He grew speechless at that, eyes casted down to the ground as he looked away to avoid Tom's accusing gaze, and that in itself was already an answer.

"Exactly my point."

Shawn was slowly crumbling, the gears in his head turning as he started to grow confused as to what he truly feels. He does love you, no doubt about that, but is that the main reason why he wanted you back? Or is there an underlying reason, a certain feeling that Shawn just can't seem to admit?

The curly-headed boy wasn't given the time to clear his head though, because Tom didn't stop, he wasn't near done.

Maybe it was all because of the pent up frustration he had for Shawn after so long. Granted, Tom doesn't know much about the guy, but he's heard enough. Just the name of the man who broke the woman Tom cares so much about, he's been hearing it over and over for months on end, all the things he's done. And now, Tom just wanted to let all his frustrations out and give him a piece of his mind.

"I know you're hurting right now, I can see it, but I care about Y/N a lot, and after seeing what you did to her, plus the aftermath? I don't want to be an asshole but you deserve all of it, if not more." Tom crossed his arms over his chest, jaw clenching as his mind went back to all the times you spent hurt and crying in his arms. You were an amazing, kindhearted, and compassionate woman, and you didn't deserve even an ounce of what Shawn put you through.

"Shut the fuck up Tom. You have no right to tell me what I deserve, you're not even in the fucking picture because this is between me and Y/N. This is none of your business. I will choose what the fuck I want to do and who are you to stop me huh?" Shawn growled through gritted teeth, fists balled at his sides as he took a step towards Tom, but the lad didn't seem to be bothered, not when he could match Shawn's anger easily.

"You've already made your choice the moment you broke her heart mate. You chose to be with someone else. Fucking hell, you are with said someone else right now, and then all of the sudden you want her back? Because what? It bothers you to see her with someone? To see her with me?" Tom held his head high as he spat, nostrils flaring with a glare to match, not showing any signs of weakness as they grew even closer, heat radiating off of both guys and it was a matter of time before someone explodes.

Tom was in dangerous proximity if Shawn gets even angrier and decides to get physical, but he wasn't scared, not even a little bit. The guy was obviously taller, maybe bulkier sure, but Tom? Well, he's had training. He knows how to box.

The two were pushing each other to their limit, poking the bear until one finally cracks, neither one seeming to back down as anger, pride, and egos collide. Tom even more so as he kept going at Shawn, words not lessening any blow even in the slightest. Tom had to make sure it thoroughly gets to him, that's why he had to make it sting.

"You weren't there to see how broken she was, how broken you made her, I was. You didn't see how dark it got, how low she felt, but I did. The amount of times she cried because of you, the countless times she felt so insecure about every part of her being because of you, the number of times she beat herself up by saying she was never, and will never be enough all because of what you did, I was fucking there for all of it and it fucking hurts to see her like that." Tom's temper was slowly slipping from him, his heart pounding against his ears at the mere thought of you in pain. He just cares about you so much, and remembering what you went through, it was clouding his mind.

When he went out to follow Shawn, he was planning to just have a casual talk, maturely settle some matters, and maybe even extend some comfort but things escalated way too fast and got way too heated and here they were now, one upping each other on who could get even more angry.

"I'm not standing here out of spite and jealousy, I'm here to tell you that I'm not letting you break her apart again and then just leave for her to pick up the pieces after. I sure as hell won't let her go back to old ways, because she doesn't fucking deserve that Shawn. She deserves to be truly happy, to heal, and you're not the person for that, not anymore because you're the person who broke her." The accusation in Tom's voice was clear as day, and Shawn heard it all too loud, each word ringing in his ear.

Shawn was breathing heavily now, heart beating rapidly against his chest as it pounded hard that it might as well break his ribs, but the anger, once it starts to boil, then it gets even harder to control.

"You're words don't have weight on me. I don't know you, I don't care about you and you're not stopping me from getting her back." Shawn didn't even convince himself on what he said, because everything that Tom has been saying, it was getting to him, in the heart and mind. It was painful to hear it, but maybe that's because it was the truth.

"Can't you see what you're doing to her right now? You're making her relive the darkest times of her life. She's been so much better than before, she's worked so hard to be better, and then you just come prancing in expecting that if you say you still love her, that'll fix everything? Well guess what, It did the exact opposite." Tom wasn't sure what it was but he can't seem to hold his tongue anymore, he was fighting fire with fire, two minds too consumed with outrage that nobody was having any sort of grip on themselves, no sense of control and that only breathes nothing but disaster.

"Shut up." Shawn grumbled hastily, nails digging into his palms at how tight he was balling his fists. The ringing in his ears, it was getting louder and louder, and Tom's words were only making things worse.

"If you can't see how much you're hurting her by pushing your way back into her life then you don't care about her, you only care about yourself. You're just being selfish and it hurts your pride that for once, you're not getting your way with this."

And that's when all Shawn saw was red.

"Shut up!" Shawn screamed, Tom stumbling back once he felt a full on fist collide with his nose and before Tom could even do as much as regain himself, another one hit him square on the jaw.

"Tom!"

Shawn froze at the sound of your voice, shaking and blood-covered fist raised in the air as he watched you run towards them.

A cold chuckle left Tom's lips, wiping the warm blood running down his nose with the back of his hand as he looked at Shawn tauntingly. "You've got to hit harder than that mate."

Shawn glared at Tom, and he was really going to have another blow but you've already reached them before he could even flinch.

"No! You two! Stop!" You hissed.

Shawn's anger was quick to dissipate with just one look at you, quick to be replaced by pure guilt and regret. He was staring at you with a deep frown, and when your eyes met his, all he saw was a look of pure shock followed by disappointment. You shook your head at him, sighing as you turned to the other boy, eyes growing wide once you finally took in his state.

"Oh god, your nose is still bleeding, dammit!" You scrambled, both hands cupping Tom's face gently, turning it from side to side to check if there were any more injuries. The lad only chuckled softly, leaning into your touch like a puppy, hands holding onto your wrists as he gave it a reassuring squeeze. "I'm fine love."

"Well you don't look it!" You scolded, worry laced in your features because this idiot's nose has been broken one too many times, and you were scared that this might have done some permanent damage. And as if Tom read your mind, he spoke.

"It wasn't that hard of a punch, I'm going to be fine." He was clearly instigating Shawn, provoking him to do something again so that Tom could have his chance too, but the other guy only scoffed, crossing his arms to stop himself from doing anything, because if Shawn does, then Tom wins.

"Thomas." You glared at the boy in warning, still in the state of confusion and shock as to why the two of them are here and having a fist fight in the first place. "Okay, okay, I'll stop, sorry darling." Tom pouted at you, to which you could only roll your eyes.

Men and their egos.

Shawn on the other hand has finally had the time to clear his head. He wasn't going to deny the jealousy that was consuming him just watching you be so gently, caring and sweet with Tom, and he so badly just wanted to leave but he needs to talk to you. "Y/N—"

"Just wait Shawn. I'll talk to you in a second." You sighed, sparing him a quick glance over you shoulder to see him nod solemnly and wait, weight shifting from one foot to another, head down like a puppy being scolded.

You turned back to Tom with an equally long sigh. These two really decided to butt heads, at such a public event and place, you were just praying that there weren't any paps or anyone for that matter who caught what just happened. That'd be a party for the press for sure, you can already see the horrifying headlines.

"Go back inside please, Tricia is just by the door maybe she has a tissue in hand." Tom frowned at that, sparing Shawn a look before his worried eyes were back on you. "But—"

"I can handle myself Tom." You flashed him a reassuring smile, but that still didn't seem to put Tom at ease. "I know. It's him I don't trust."

"I can hear you." Shawn interrupted with straight-out snark.

"Good!" Tom responded rather too enthusiastically with mockery laced in his tone, and the two were quick to be back on glaring at each other, willing to have another go, especially Tom because a part of him was itching to land at least one painful punch.

You let out a loud groan of utter aggravation.

Kids. Literal kids and it was taking everything in your power not to grab them both by the ear and drag them inside or to pull all of your hair out and off your head, whichever comes first.

"Tom, please? I'll meet you inside in a bit." You pleaded, and Tom could see that you were starting to get even more exasperated with the two of them bickering. So, he flashed you a sweet smile, giving your arm a comforting rub and then turning on his heel to walk back inside, but not before calling out to Shawn one last time.

"Remember everything that I said Shawn."

With that, Tom was out of sight, you turning around to meet Shawn who was already looking at you with so many emotions, a few of which were sorrow, guilt and regret.

"Y/N, I—" Shawn stopped himself, his mind still a jumbled mess that he can't think of what to say to you. You waited for him to continue, sporting a frown of your own as you took him in, his hollowed cheeks, messy hair, his bloodshot eyes, and his whole demeanor just...different.

"Shawn I'm worried about you." You sighed as you walked closer, the boy shaking his head as he ran a hand over his face. "I'm okay." Shawn stated ever so softly, eyes avoiding yours and that only made your frown deepen.

Worry was growing inside your chest the more you look at him, all defeated and lost, because as much as you're angry and hurt with everything that involves him, you can't find it in yourself to turn off that caring side, the one you'll always have when it's him.

"No Shawn, you are not okay. This isn't you." Your shoulders slumped as you watched him avoid your gaze still, head hanging low even when you're only just a foot apart. "You're not one to pick up fights Shawn, not even when you're drunk. Out of all the people I know, you're the one who has the most control with their temper. And you don't look okay, you've lost so much weight and I can tell just by looking at you. You look too tired, and you just don't look...happy." You pointed out softly.

Shawn lifted his head as he nodded, bottom lip caught between his teeth to stop it from trembling, but his eyes were still elsewhere, still refusing to meet yours.

"Shawn, what's going on?" You asked, just in general, because the happy and glowing Shawn you knew was lost. Some might say it was the toll of touring the world but deep inside, you knew there was something else, something more.

"I–I'm sorry." Shawn croaked, voice breaking as he finally looked at you, so much guilt and regret swimming in his teary eyes. "I–Tom told me... that you went through so much because of me and I'm just—I'm so sorry honey. I really screwed up and I–I know this will never be enough but I'm really sorry... for everything." Shawn couldn't get his words out straight, lips quivering as he tried his very best to keep his tears at bay, but he was miserably failing at it.

You felt your heart ache at the sight, completely at a loss for words because you don't really know what to say. You can't lie to him just to make him feel better, and you can't tell him anything else apart from the full truth. But the truth might just be too cruel, because you haven't forgiven him, at least not yet, and you really don't want to rub salt on the gaping wound.

Shawn must've sensed that you were troubled, because he took courage to take your hand in his, touch delicate as he gave it a reassuring squeeze. "It's okay if you don't want to say anything. I know it will never be easy to forgive me and I understand that, I don't deserve an easy way out of this." He was sniffling his words, tears now slowly falling down his face as he looks at you ever so longingly, and you were stuck again, stuck under his gaze.

You can feel your own tears starting to build, just looking at the broken man in front of you was enough to pull at your heartstrings. You were so conflicted inside, two voices in your head arguing on what you should do, and you don't have the strength to choose one, not when Shawn was so close, close enough to make your walls crumble piece by piece, close enough too for him to easily sway your decision.

Lifting a hand up Shawn cupped your cheek, fingers trembling until it touched your skin, the cold feeling of his palm making your eyes flutter shut as you tried to get a hold of whatever rational thought you had left.

You weren't giving in, you just can't, not after everything you've been through.

"I was fucking stupid, and there won't be a day that goes by that I won't regret everything that I did to you. I will live with the consequences for as long as I need to, but I want you—no, I need you to know that I do still love you, and I–I think I always will." You shook your head as a quiet sob escaped your lips before you could even stop it, a single tear escaping down your face because you were suddenly taken back, to all those memories, both dreams and nightmares.

The stitches on your heart were starting to rip apart, one thread at a time, the pain and hurt back on it's course as your mind kept replaying everything, both good and bad but the bad, it always seems to have the upper hand. "Shawn I—we can't, I can't go back." You whispered. The shake in your voice, the look of utter sorrow and conflict written across your beautiful features were enough for Shawn to understand what was meant, when Tom said that Shawn was only hurting you even further by pushing his way back into your life.

He truly does understand, and as much as he hates to admit it, Tom has opened his eyes. "I know honey, I know and I respect and accept that. It was wrong for me to ask after everything that you've been through, after everything that I put you through. You deserve so much better and I'm really sorry angel." Both of Shawn's hand were holding your face tenderly now, thumb swiping across your cheek to get rid of the tears that were coating them.

You could only give him a nod as you sniffled, words still a jumbled mess inside your head while so many different feelings swam in your heart. You weren't usually the one to grow speechless when it comes to most things, but tonight, you properly have no idea what to say. You can't tell him it's okay when it's not, you can't say you forgive him when you haven't, and you also can't say what the future might hold for the both of you because you really don't know.

The way he looks so fragile, so broken as trickle of tears kept running down his face, you can't find it in you at all to just tell him the cold truth.

Shawn closed his eyes momentarily, dragging in a breath, gathering all the strength that he has left before his brown orbs met yours again. "It hurts me to say this but it's the right thing to do. I have to let you go and I will. I'll keep my distance and let you heal, let you be as happy as you can be, even if it's not with me."

"And you're right, you always are. I am not okay." Shawn let's out a broken sob at that, his dried up tears replaced by new ones as it falls down his face, eyes back on the ground to hide the pain coating them.

Your nimble fingers wrapped itself around his wrists, slowly pulling his hands off your face as you took it in yours. You gave it a squeeze, the action making Shawn look up back to you with teary eyes and trembling lips. "Shawn, you need to take care of yourself. You need to heal too. And please, don't do it for me, don't do it for anyone else but you. Be okay for yourself. Please?"

Shawn gave you a soft nod, a slight pang hitting his chest because you just have the biggest heart, and the fact that he broke it to pieces, he feels so angry and disappointed at himself.

"Can you promise that?" You flashed him a small but genuine smile, hands letting go of his as you raised your pinky finger between your bodies.

Shawn bit his bottom lip to suppress a sob, slowly nodding his head as the tears blurred his vision again. The fact that you still have a little faith that he'd keep a promise, after everything, you just deserve the whole world and more. Shawn is and will always be the biggest idiot for what's he's done to a person as sweet and kind as you.

"I–I promise."

You engulfed him in a hug much to Shawn's surprise, but slowly, his strong arms wrapped around your waist as you rubbed comforting circles on his back. Shawn closed his eyes to relish your warm embrace, as sigh of content escaping his lips, giving you one last squeeze before pulling away.

You two looked at each other, sharing a short but sweet moment as you both exchanged smiles. It wasn't as wide nor bright, but it was genuine, a telltale sign that whatever the future maybe for the both of you, the path of redemption, forgiveness and healing was clear. Whether your paths would cross again at the end? It was for the universe to know and you to find out.

"I'll see you around rockstar."

And with that you walked away. But oddly enough, Shawn's heart doesn't feel as heavy as he watched you leave. Shawn felt content with what happened and he was gladly looking forward to what lies ahead.

-:-:-:-:-

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[angeldolanx]

First time with Grayson

Summary: first time having sex with Grayson, who is not your boyfriend but more then a friend. /btw it’s a part from my fanfiction called Bucket list/

Words: 5k.

Warnings: sexual content 

09.07.’19.

“I thought you aren’t gonna come” I said to Grayson after I opened my apartment's door for him. 

“Sorry we filmed all day” he replied while pulled me closer for a quick hug. To be honest as soon as I mentioned him that I am gonna cook some dinner he said that he is gonna come over later. Well it was around ten already, so it was a really late dinner for him, but he still came. 

After we went to my kitchen I put the pasta that I made to the microwave while he set on the bar stool. 

“How was your day?” I asked.

“Busy, but fun. Yours?”

“Chill. I looked after Sophie almost the whole day” I replied and put the plate in front of him with a fork.

“If it’s good, I am gonna marry you” he chuckled.

“Don’t wanna marry me just because I am good at cooking” I smiled.

While he ate I leaned against the counter behind me and we started to talk about basically everything. He explained what are they working on with E and what are their plans, and kept complimenting the food that was way too easy to create, but it was still cute how thankful he was for it. As he finished he jumped off from the bar stool, put the plate to the washer next to me and stepped really close to me. 

“Thank you” he whispered as he put his hand on my waist and grabbed it slightly. Touched like this were my favorite from him. It was always gentle but still manly, it always sent shivers down my spine.

“You are welcome” I replied quietly too. “You look tired” I added after I looked up into his eyes and put one of my hand gently on his face and brushed my thumb on his dark undereye bags. The way he leaned in more to get more from my touch and closed his eyes made me smile and my heart flutter.

“I don’t slept too good yesterday, noone was there to cuddle with me” he pouted while I just rolled my eyes with a light chuckle. 

“I never in my life had someone to cuddle with, so please don't think I am gonna feel sorry for you “ I grunted that made him laugh.

“You are so special” he looked deep into my eyes. The strong gaze made me look away from him while I bit my lip. 

“Stop” I pushed him away from me, I was still really bad at handling compliments. He just laughed at my reaction and went straight to my living room to lay down on my couch. I hesitated for a few long minutes about what should I say, but I rocked again with my now or never thought and I went for it. “You can sleep here if you don’t wanna drive home like this” I said. I could see that my words surprised him but he tried to cover it with that small smile on his face. Since I started to blush again I went to my bedroom, where Grayson followed me and now he laid straight on my bad. To be honest a men like him looked really great finally in my bedroom, for the first time ever. 

While he go comfortable on my bed, I went to the bathroom. I quickly took a hot shower, washed off my makeup and picked up a hoodie. There was a though in the back of my head that I should pick something more sexier or something, but the whole situation was already new to me and I didn’t wanted to make it even more uncomfortable for me. Before I went out I looked into the mirror and took a deep sigh. There is a men in my bed. At this point my brain tortured me with the thoughts that were on my head, so before I could overthink more I went back to the bedroom. 

“At least I am gonna have someone to cuddle with” he said with a cheeky smile on his face after I turned off the lights and I laid down next to him, but my back faced him. 

“ I am not a cuddly type of girl” I said. He chuckled while wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him. The whole thing was just too intimate for me. I tried to took deep breaths for minutes meanwhile just hoped that he is gonna fall asleep quickly and I can move a bit farther from him.  I felt quite embarrassed because of the way my body reacted to him. Of course it reacted. Sometimes I felt like I got horny, because just the way he looked at me. He was just so attractive.

Why I am like this?

I was just angry at myself. It was quiet, but my mind raced with unspoken thoughts. I really tried to distract my thoughts, but I always ended up thinking about the slight poke on my ass. I bit my lip and moved a bit closer to him. My heart started to race in my chest as I moved my hips a bit and grinded myself against him. I thought he is sleeping but his arm tightened around my waist, clearly showing that he was still awake. I needed to bite my lips again when I felt his lips on the back of my neck. He started with small kisses, that slowly turned into little bites when he took my pace with his hips and moved against me. I could feel how he started to harden.

I was a weak idiot. In movies or fanfictions in these situations the girl turns around and kisses the boy or something. And what did I do? I just took Gray's hand off from me quickly,  stood up from the bed and went out to the kitchen. As soon as I was out from the bedroom I took a deep breath.

My whole brain was cloudy and I didn't even understood myself. I felt almost guilty, because Grayson had such a big impact on me, even though the whole thing was normal, just new to me. I never in my life met with a man like him and I hated it, that this situation was completely strange to me where I didn't know what's normal and what's not. I didn't even know his side. What are his thoughts and feelings when he is around me. I wonder if he can feel the sparks too when we make eye contact or is it just something, that I just telling to myself. With these thoughts I was definitely not ready to go back so I went to my kitchen, and poured myself a glass of water.

“What's wrong?”

I jumped a bit when I heard Grayson's deep voice behind me. I took a big sigh, before I turned around and looked at him.  He was shirtless and  a grey sweatpants was the only thing that covered his perfect body. Those pants definitely did nothing to cover what was underneath, only the thought that I caused that made me want to moan out loud. When I looked at his upper body I really tried to not think about the fact that how smooth his skin looked and how beautiful and attractive his muscles were. His mouth were so plump, pink and soft and the fact that he was such a good kisser made me wonder how they would feel somewhere else on my body.

I forgot to breath for a moment when I looked into his eyes, which looked darker this time. His gaze was so hard while he made eye contact with me.

“I was just thirsty” I answered the question that he asked and took a sip from the cold water, but I still tried to keep the eye contact with him. I saw how my response made his muscles tightened and he run his hand through his soft hair. God, if he would be just a little bit less attractive, my whole life would be so much easier.

“ You really answer me that in the most innocent way after the things that you've done?” he asked with a mad sigh. I bit my lip, and tried to look the other way as if it would help anything. “ Stop biting your fucking lip!

His voice was so deep and at this point I couldn't help myself and I let a smile spread on my face, that I couldn't stop. I simply enjoyed that I made this to him. He was turned on, he was frustrated and now he was a bit mad too.

With this smile my nervousness almost immediately eased and the confident me started to come back, who is aware of her abilities and know what she could do if she wants to. I leaned against the kitchen counter with my hand crossed in front of my chest. On my lips there was still a confident smile and now I didn't saw myself as a lost teenager anymore. The way he looked at me was enough to give my confidence back.

The air trapped in my throat when he began to approach me. I stood in a small terrain so it wasn't difficult to him to stood between my legs. He trapped me between him and the kitchen counter and he pushed me hard into it with his hips. My hand were still crossed in front of my chest and I tried to don’t show any reaction to him when I looked up into his beautiful eyes. He was so tall and wide compared to me, he could cover my comlite body with his when he stepped in front of me that close.

When he moved toward me with his face I thought he's gonna kiss me, but he didn't. Our eye contact was so intense, I could see his hungriness in his eyes. He driven me crazy with the fact that his lips were only a few millimeters away from mine, but he didn't do anything. I knew he did this on purpose, as a revenge because I teased him in my bedroom.

I thought now or never, so I stood on my tip toes and pressed our lips together. A manly groan leaved his mouth when our hips grinded because of my moves and then he started to kiss me passionately. He grabbed my wrist with his hands and placed my arms on his shoulders, meanwhile he put one arm around my waist and one on my ass, and squeezed it hard. At the same time his tongues fight for dominance against mine and I was the one, who gave up first and let him control our kiss.  This situation just showed us how stubborn we both were. Maybe that's why he enjoyed it so much when I gave the control to him so he could rule over me, and move me like a doll.

In a situation like this I didn't mind it that much, I was inexperienced and I enjoyed too much our amazing kiss to complain or protest. That quote, that I read the other day made sense now. Don't tell what to do, when I have my clothes on.

I whimpered to our kiss, when he held me closely by my ass to his hips, and keep rubbed his hardened dick against me. He only interrupted our kiss when he lifted me up by my thighs to the counter, and started to  kiss my jawline, making his way downward to my neck, and to my collarbone. I shout my eyes and slipped my hand to his soft hair while the other caressed his nape. I let out a breathy moan, when his cold hands slipped under my hoodie and grabbed my boobs while he kissed my neck softly and slowly, nibbling on my skin.

At this point I couldn't even think about anything. His soft touches and kisses made my head dizzy and I was so wet, only because of him and he didn't even touched me there yet.  

I was a bit confused when he stopped for a second and pulled a bit over from my neck and stared deeply into my eyes. He's hand still caressed my back and I moved closer to the edge of to counter so I could wrap my legs around his waist. I wanted to be as close to him as possible. I really didn't wanted to let him go.

“ You are so beautiful” he whispered. My lips were probably swollen from our kisses, and I could just imagine how messy my hair was and how red my cheeks were. As response I just bit my lower lip with my teeth and he immediately got on the opportunity and pulled my chin a bit, so I let out my lip and he bit it instead.  I smirked, I knew that biting my lip was his weakness and he probably fantasied about this situation a lot.

I was a bit surprised when I suddenly didn't felt the counter anymore underneath me because Grayson picked me up. I crossed my legs tight around his waist, while he held me. On our way to the bedroom now I was the one who started to torture the sensitive skin on his jawline first, and then moved down to his neck. As my lips brushed against his skin mixed with some kisses it was easy to find his weak spot. When I reached a point underneath his jawline his body tightened and grabbed my ass hard. I smirked and tried to gave that spot some extra attention till we got the my bedroom. He laid me down on my soft mattress gently and as he leaned over me and as he supported his weight on his arms the muscles tightened on his biceps. I caressed my hand on it slowly while he looked down at me with assertive eyes.

“I wanna see you” he whispered and reached to my lamp to turn it on, which filled the room with warm light. As he leaned back to me, now he pressed his whole body against mine and I spread my legs more so he could fit easier between them. When he touched my face with his hand and put back my hair under my ear I started to think about how could he be so gentle but passionate too at the same time. He drove me crazy with that. “ Are you sure, you are ready? “ he asked while looked deep into my eyes, like if he would need my absolute full consent before continuing.

“ I can't think of anything that I want more right now, than this” I answered and caressed my thumb on his soft lips.

His hands reached to my hoodie and I arched my back a bit so he could pull it of from me easily. I layed in front of him in a black lacy pants, while he sat on his calf and glazed down on me. He was the first men ever who saw me like that, but I liked how I looked in his glaze. His jaw clenched and his eyes burnt my skin.

He leaned a bit over and he put his hand on my neck and slowly began to slide down, while his eyes followed his hand's movements.  I held my breath back, his fingers moved around on both of my boobs and gently grabbed them, then moved towards.  He caressed my stomach, and when he reached the edge of my pantie I bit my lip and took a deep sigh. When he looked up to my face and saw that I am a bit tense he towered over me and he left a kiss on my forehead.

“ I got you, angel” whispered Grayson. The nickname made my heart flutter and I tried to derive my tension with a passionate kiss. He probably knew why I did that because I felt how he smirked and let me dominate as our tongues danced wildly. I got into that kiss so much, my brain just turned off and I didn't even realized what he was doing until I felt the cold air on my crotch area and he dropped my panties to the ground.

When he found a certain point,  which I didn't even know that is exist behind my ears, my body jolted and a slight  whimper came out from my mouth as he started to work on my weak spot. I gripped his biceps and moved my head to the side to give him even more space. His wet kisses slowly turned into harder sucking, till I hissed a bit when he gave me a hickey. As I let out a quiet moan I  still felt embarrassed to be louder, but for the first time in my life I didn't had a chance to overthink it, because his hands started to move downward to my boobs, down to my stomach and now he didn't stopped. I bit my lip because of the first feel of his fingers touching my pussy. As Grayson’s fingers began to lightly roll around my toes curled and I grabbed into the mattress with one hand, while the other slipped into his soft hair.

“You are so wet” he smirked down at me and I felt that my cheeks flushing in excitement yet embarrassment at the same time.

As he worked on my pussy I spread my legs more and at this point I was completely his, but I still completely trusted him. Her fingers slowly drifted down from my clit and he slid a finger into me, slowly at first.  Wet sounds of his fingers plunging in and out of my pussy could be heard from my bedroom as he started to move his hand faster. When he added an another finger my gasping started to getting louder with some moan.

“God, you are so sexy” he whispered to himself. His jaw clenched and I could see how frustrated and turned on he was too. I was glad that he kissed me, while he fingered me so good, my loud moans died in our passionate kiss. I needed to break our kiss to get some air when he curled his fingers and hit a good spot. At this point I didn't give a fuck about being loud or nah and I let out a really loud groan. “I found it” he smirked while I hid my face in his shoulder.

My brain was already completely fogged, the whole situation was so intense but still felt so good. I thought I should be a bit braver, so I moved my hands down on his muscular body and grabbed his rock hard bulge through his sweatpants. As I squeezed him a bit his loopy eyes wanted to shut tight at the feeling, he even came out of the rhythm with his fingers but he quickly pulled himself together and started to fuck me even harder with his fingers.

“Are you close? I can feel you clenching “ he mumbled to my neck.

“ Uhmm” I replied, and he started to finger me even faster and deeper than ever. The feeling in my stomach started to become more and more intense. I lost my self control, my legs started to shake and I cried out loudly when I came hard all over his fingers.

A huge sigh left my mouth, when he pulled out his fingers and I bit my lip when I looked up to his eyes. He had a confident smile on his face as he leaned over me fully again, and squeezed my ass. I always wondered if he is a more ass or tits guy, but now I am pretty sure about my thoughts.

“I want to fuck you so bad, babe” he muttered into my mouth, and then kissed me hard. I've felt that he can't wait more, so I pulled down his pants with his boxer and he helped me to remove them completely.  He still kissed me violently, his tongue fought with mine, while I slipped down my hands on his back and squeezed his ass. His hips moved a bit further and I felt his bare rock hard dick on my stomach.  With a slight smile I glanced down at him and wasn't surprise by the satisfied grin that I received from him. How is this gonna fit into me. - I thought to myself, and I tried really hard to not show him anything on my face about my thoughts of his size. He was already confident enough.

When he leaned to my nightstand for his wallet I took a deep breath. He opened the condom, and rolled it up to his large and hard dick. As he looked down at me, he saw that I am tense again so he leaned towards me and tried to distract my attention with his soft lips on my neck, on my face and then on my lips. At the same time, I felt that he positioned himself to my entrance then slowly,  inches by inches pushed himself inside me and then quickly stopped. He interrupted our kiss, and closed his eyes tightly, while his muscles tightened.

“You are so tight, holy shit” he said breathlessly. I saw that he really tried to hold himself back from going deeper and faster, while I was tried to distract my  thoughts from the strange feeling, which was oddly uncomfortable but still enjoyable. When I moved my hips he almost immediately understood that I am ready for more, so he continued to move a couple of inches farther.

“Keep.. keep going… “ I whispered while bit my inner lip.

“ I don't wanna hurt you” he mumbled to my neck. I was so fucking angry at myself, when I felt that my heart skipped a beat because of what he said. Just too much has happened at the same time. I started to think about my feelings, but at the same time I tried to get used to the odd feeling that in one minute was so uncomfortable but in the other it started to become a enjoyable pleasure.

When I moved my hips he moved further again and with that when I looked down I finally see that he's full length was in me. For a moment, it was too much. He was deep, so deep inside me, up to the point when I actually felt him almost in my stomach. It felt like this last few inches just stretched me out too much and it even hurt a bit. I spasmodically held to the sheet and pressed my head back to the pillow.

“You okay?”  Grayson mumbled to me when he noticed that I am uncomfortable, with his eyes and voice full of concern. I took a deep breath and nodded instead of answering. He reached to my hand and clasped it with his next to my head in the pillow. We looked deep into each others eyes. He was so attractive with the few sweat drops on his forehead and with the messy hair that probably I caused to him. At this point I knew that I fucked up, and it's gonna be really hard to be just friends with him in the future.

I felt like he would wait infinity, if that's what good for me, but as soon as the uncomfortable feeling eased I pulled him down to a violent kiss and I started to rock my hips as much as I could under him. He groaned to my mouth and then started to move his hips slowly. Inside me and back out. Again and again.

“ Oh my god” I whimpered as my face scrunched up in pleasure. Grayson looked surprised, but then he smirked down at me and he started to move braver. I knew he liked, when he heard my voice. I let out a breath that I didn’t know I've been holding while he placed his hand on my waist and started to thrust his hips. Rougher, deeper, fester but yet in a gentle motion. “ Fuck, it feels so good” I whispered with a breathy moan.

“So good” he repatied as he bent over and groaned to my ears.  

“Faster” I gasped, while my nails digged to his back from the pleasure.

“ Are you sure?” Grayson moaned in surprise.

“ Uhmm” I mumbled and for a second I clenched my walls around his cock. He hid his face in my neck to try to suppress his deep groan, and he couldn't take more. He began to move harder and faster, which was enough to make me start to feel the knot in my stomach get tighter and tighter. “ I am so close” I whimpered to his ear.

“Come on, angel. Cum for me” Grayson said while his hands moved down and grabbed my ass. My legs started to shake and my walls clenched around him. Grayson began to slam his hips into mine, ramming my walls a bit harder while small moans of pleasure began to leave his mouth too. I tried to roll my hips automatically into his, trying to shove him even deeper inside me. His cock stretched me out so well and the only thing that I could think was the pure pleasure that he gave me.

“Yes...yes. Grayson” I cried out when I came hard around him. My breathing was heavy when I hid my face in his neck. I completely lost my control and just gave myself fully to the pure pressure. Grayson kept going fast until I felt his cock twitching inside me. He let out a manly, deep groan and I even gave him more pleasure when i clenched my walls while he cumed. He was so sexy, his head fell back, and he closed his eyes tightly. His hips moved back and forth slowly to ride out his climax and then stopped. Before he pulled out he put his head on my chest and I played with his hair while we tried to calm down our heavy breathing. After a few minutes he lifted his head, and looked at me with a cheeky smile on his face, that made me giggle.

“Don't look at me like that” I said and tried to look to the other way from his face.

“Did you enjoyed it?” he asked. His voice was even deeper than normal. His eyes looked for mine, but after he failed he put his hand on my face and turned my face to his way.

“It wasn't clear enough?” I asked. A cheeky smile spread on his face before he placed a kiss on my forehead and laid next to me. “I’ll be back” I said as I picked up his white tee that Grayson wore today and went out to the bathroom.

I needed a few minutes alone to collect myself. As I looked into the mirror a light smile spread on my face as I pushed my hair to one side. I could see a sparkle in my eye that I never seen before and of course the hickeys that covered my neck on one side. As I went back Grayson immediately looked at me with a smile. The blanket only covered his legs, while his arms were under his head. I swear to god he looked like  fucking goddess on my bed. 

“Why are you looking at me like that?” I asked with a small laugh as I kneeled on the bed next to his body. He put his large palm on my thigh and moved it up and down as he looked deep into my eyes.

“Like what?”

“I don’t know..powerfully?” I shrugged my shoulder and even laughed on my own wording.

“Are you okay?” he asked seriously but he was not able to make my mood go down, or any bad thought come to my head.

“Are you joking? I am more than okay” 

Hearing my words he started to laugh and grabbed my waist with both of his hands to lay me down, and he leaned on my again.

“ I'm happy I waited, till I met you” I said now I am a lot more seriously. Instead of a answer he put my hair behind my ear and left a long kiss on my lips.

I was truly happy because that's how exactly I pictured my first time. I didn't wanted it to be a big deal, with flowers and candles and stuff. I know I waited for a long time, around me everyone around my age is a lot more experienced, but I never was ashamed because of it. I knew there's gonna be a guy, who I am gonna trust fully without any back thoughts and a memory gonna stay in me, that I can always look back with a smile on my face. Even if he would say that that’s it, he just wanted a night with me it would be still a good memory, because the whole experience was something else, that I never felt before. He was the one, who called me angel sometimes, that always causes butterflies in my stomach but sometimes I thought he is my angel. A angel who got suddenly in my life and turned it upside down to make me happier than I ever was before.

- lose virginity √

As I wrote in the summary that was a part from my fanfiction. If you are interested how these two got here and what’s the future brings to them on the girl’s trip to LA, check out the book on wattpad. :)

https://www.wattpad.com/story/207823579-bucket-list-grayson-dolan

[omg-foreverfilledwithweird-posts]

Daddy’s Girl

Pairing: AU! Bucky Barnes X Reader

Summary: Bucky Barnes, a single father of his daughter Winnifred, named after his late mother, with sad, tortured eyes and a kind, open heart, hires Y/N to babysit his little girl while he works at his new construction job, coming home only at lunchtime. Innocent and fiery and compassionate, you find your way into his heart and soon his daughter isn’t the only one you come over for.

A/N: so as you can see I haven’t posted a fanfiction in awhile, been busy and stuff, and i want to go back to my roots and write a bucky story cause i adore writing him and I haven’t written an AU yet so I decided to do this one (he’s still a super soldier and was around in the 40′s just domesticated now we love him uwu) and as always i hope you guys enjoy and feedback is appreciated because it’s my only form of validation and i love it this ones a long one btw and rushed and WHOA and if ya want a part two LEMME KNOW

Warnings: really freaking fluffy, mild language, age-difference, cuteness, mentions of cheating and war trauma, slight angst, alcohol consumption, heavy makeout, 

Your knuckles ghosts over the large, wooden doorway laden with vines, climbing up the cedar detailing, other hand gripping your bag strap tightly. You’re nervous, to say the least, this job funding your payments for online university and you don’t want to jeopardize anything on your first day. He’s offered more than enough for your hourly wage, more than any babysitting job you’ve had before, any job for that matter, and based on his house, it’s no wonder he can afford to do so.

Your fist finally knocks against the door and it opens almost immediately, as if he’s been waiting behind the door this whole time you’ve been standing here, both stalling. You’ve only heard his voice over the phone, deep and charming, but that didn’t do him justice. Sculpted face, from marbled, olive clay, cerulean blue eyes that are already looking you over, dark, brunette hair to his jawline and messy with the slightest of curls, and lips, curved at the edges permanently, like he was born with a face to smile. His left arm is made of metal, cool and hard steel you want to reach out and touch like a painting in the Met, off limits. But you don’t dare stare too long, don’t dare pry. He’s beautiful and you’re almost stunned into silence, not expecting the man before you.

“Y/n, right?” he asks, flashing a soft, half smile, warm and inviting.

“No, wait... yeah,” you laugh nervously, shaking your head, scrunching your nose when embarrassment floods to your face, flushed. “Sorry, yes, I’m y/n.”

His smile widens, “I’m James, but I go by Bucky. You can call me whichever you like. Please, come on in.”

You share in his smile, making the eye contact your past bosses would always reprimand you about, something about respect they said, and walk inside when he opens the door a little wider for you, “Yes, sir,” you say and he ignores the not so subtle tug in his chest when you say that, following in behind you after shutting the door.

“So uh... this is my humble abode, I guess,” he tugs on the curls at the ends of his hair as your eyes scan the house, speechless at the interior design, imagining that it gets lonely in this big home with just the two of them.

“Humble isn’t exactly the word I would use,” you look back at him. “Your home is gorgeous. This foyer alone is bigger than my apartment,” you laugh lightly.

Bucky noticeably softens, bashful, hands stuffed deep in his pockets when he walks ahead of where your standing rooted to the floor, “It was my ma’s... she left it after she passed. I’ve barely been able to keep up with the payments, but I do what I can.”

“I tried to...” he notices a barbie doll laying on the ground and kicks it swiftly under the staircase so you wouldn’t see but you catch the small exchange and smile. “Clean up as much one can with a five year old spider monkey on their back. I apologize if it’s messy in some rooms.”

You giggle, “No need to be sorry,” you assure him, tugging on your bag strap, filled to the brim with games to keep the child busy and occupied, also including some snacks and your cellphone. “Mess is natural.”

His shoulders slack, relaxing when hearing that, a soft smile his only response.

“Speaking of, hey, sweetheart!” he calls up the stairs, leaning against the railing, rolling up the sleeves of his light green flannel, unintentionally showing off his ripped forearms, toned and tan from working outside. “Come downstairs and meet y/n, she’s going to be taking care of you from now on while I’m working!”

“Hey is for horses, daddy!” she yells down the stairs, little voice high pitched and extremely adorable.

“Uncle Steve told you that, didn’t he?” he rolls his eyes, flashing a smile in your direction, sharing in the expression with him.

The little girl appears at the top of the staircase and she’s bouncing with energy, blonde curls raining down her shoulders, stuffed unicorn tucked under her pudgy arm, “He also said yelling is impolite. Especially when it’s from another room.”

“I’m gonna kill him,” he sighs, grumbling under his breath as he patiently awaits for his daughter to skip down the stairs, jumping into his open arms. He groans at the impact and spins her around.

“Well, how about you tell Uncle Steve to shove it,” he looks at her and she giggles, bubbling with laughter when he tickles her sides. “Can you do that for me?”

“Isn’t that mean?” she narrows her blue eyes, much like her father’s, big and bright.

“Yes, but I’ll allow it just this once.”

She nods, saluting her goofy father and he salutes back, brothers in arms. You’ve never seen a parent so in love with their kid like this, so kind and gentle.

He sets her down on the ground once again, the little girl finally acknowledging your presence with a curious tilt of her head, almost like a cat. “Is this the lady?”

“Winnifred, this is y/n,” he nudges her towards you, hand on her back pushing her forward. “And y/n, this is the spider monkey I was talking about,” he cracks a smile and you chuckle, lowering yourself to the ground to get to her level.

“Hi, Winnifred,” you extend your hand. “I’m y/n. It’s very nice to meet you. Your giraffe is really cute.”

She takes two of your fingers in her small hand, thin, golden brown glasses perched on the bridge of her nose and shakes, formal and polite when she puffs up her chest while doing her best to mimic her father, “I’m Winnifred but I go by Winnie, call me whicheva’ you prefer.”

Bucky looks at his daughter, stunned and mouth agape, “Are you mocking me?”

She furrows her small brow, faking offense, but she’s crossing her fingers behind her back where only you can see, “Of course not.”

“Were you listening this whole time, Winnie?” you ask her quietly and she grins, nodding rapidly, as hyper as the energizer bunny. You give her a small, secret fist bump, both sharing a small smile.

“You two will get along perfectly,” James rolls his eyes.

You’re braiding back Winnifred’s hair into plaited pigtails, tying off the ends with violet ribbon you brought from home, when Bucky walks down the staircase, work bag hanging off his broad shoulder. He blinks hard when he sees you, smiling with blushing cheeks, eyes tired. “Oh, hey, you’re early.”

“I also made you a sack lunch,” you hold up the paper bag with one hand, and fix up Winnie’s hair with the other.  

You’ve been here a week now and it’s slowly become routine, you getting here early even though you don’t have to, going out of your way to do nice things for him because you know he needs it, and him blushing, oblivious to your affections but growing in his own.

His hand brushes yours when he accepts the lunch from your grasp, calloused fingers touching yours.

“Goodbye, sweetheart, I love you. Be good for y/n and I’ll see you at lunch,” he kisses the top of her head and almost like it’s out of habit, sleep deprivation, confusion, or just him plain wanting to, he kisses the top of your head too.

You look up at him, surprised, and Winnifred practically squeals, deep color filling your face.

He closes his eyes in embarrassment, clearly exhausted and delirious, “I didn’t mean to do that, I’m so sorry, it’s a force of habit. I’ve made you uncomfortable, haven’t I? I’m s-”

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” you assure him, laying your hand on his forearm, subconsciously running your thumb over the skin when you try to relax his anxious rambling. You laugh a little, he’s like a puppy in more ways than one, “I’m not uncomfortable, here...” you get up off where you’re sitting on the couch, Win watching you expectantly.

You stand up on the tips of your toes, seeing as he’s six foot and then some, and kiss the top of his head, gentle and doting. “There you go, now we’re even,” you share a small smile with him, eyes alight.

He searches your face for something but you don’t know what, finding that unknown thing in your eyes before edging a soft smirk and chuckling, “Thank you. That... oddly helped.”

You grin brilliantly and Winnifred jumps on your back from the cushion on the couch, both of you sharing a laugh, “You’re welcome, I knew it would. Have a good day at work, we’ll be here.”

“You too,” he runs a hand through his behead of hair, looking at the two of you adoringly before walking over to the door.

“This isn’t work for me,” you say happily. “I love this spider monkey,” you scrunch your face up and stick out your tongue at her, Winnifred copying your silly expression.

She puts her small hands on your face and shakes you around, you toss her over your shoulder in retaliation. Bucky watches on at the adorable exchange and his heart aches in a way he’s never felt like that before, not his ex wife, not his past girlfriends, not the whirlwind of dames he went through in the 40′s army, not drunken one night stands he thought about calling the next day, and it scares him. You. And his attraction to you soon grows to much more than just that.

“Bye,” he sort of half smiles, heart beating out of his chest when he sees you give him a passing smile as he walks out, both of you still grinning even after the other leaves.

~~~

He’s sitting out on the patio when you’re about to leave for the day, just after putting Winnifred down for her nap. She had been clinging to your tee shirt until you broke down to her begging in telling her a story. There’s a bottle of beer in his hand, and you’re struck at how the moonlight is cascading down his sitting figure, how pleasing he is to look at, rocking back and forth in his white rocking chair. The paint on the old seat is chipping, old, and creaking under his weight, masking the sound of you closing the door behind you, tugging on your bag.

He sees you anyway, always taught when he was a soldier that he needs to look out and keep being alert at all times in case of an attack, that it’s either him or the enemy. His eyes are glazed over when he looks at you like he’s somewhere else before he shakes himself out of it, gulping audibly in your presence when tucks a falling strand of your hair behind his ear. He tied his hair up in a bun, the occasional tendril escaping the elastic.

His five o’clock shadow is more prominent out here in the near dark, stars speckling the sky above you both.

“Hi,” you exhale, running a hand through your hair so it’s out of your face, wearing a crooked grin Bucky can’t bring himself to want to fix. It’s so perfectly you. “I’m sorry if I interrupted your alone time, I know it’s hard to come by as of lately,” you chuckle, nervous beyond repair, almost losing your balance just standing here. “I’ll go and leave you alone-”

“Stay.”

It’s a single word and he says it with such gentleness and permanence you can’t say no. Not that you’d want to anyway, you’ll always say yes.

You nod, “I’d love to, but... are you sure?”

“Very,” he assures you, nodding towards the porch swing beside him, swaying in that late night breeze, curling itself around you and licking your bones, that warmth your feeling being something else. Someone else.

“Alright,” you concede and walk over to sit down on the swing, not needing much convincing.

You lay down on the swing, bare legs kicked up in the air when your jean shorts ride up ever so slightly, the hot sun in the day now biting you in the ass because the temperature has changed so drastically, nipping at your skin. His eyes fall over your toned legs and he’s intoxicated. You let out a long sigh you’ve been holding in all day, feeling the ice cold glass of a beer bottle in your outstretched hand, and you yelp slightly, opening your eyes and taking the beer he’s given to you with a small, gracious smile.

“Rough day?” he asks, taking a swig of his own drink.

“No, not at all, Winnifred’s the perfect kid,” you gush, twisting off the top of the bottle and sipping the drink. “I just never sleep. What with college and stuff.”

He smiles at the compliment to his daughter, agreeing completely, “Where do you go?”

“Community college down the street by my apartment, I only go part time, but it’s still... time consuming. I stayed up all night studying for upcoming exams.”

“Today isn’t so good for everyone I guess,” he nurses his drink, swirling it around absentmindedly. “Today’s an anniversary of mine.”

You frown a little at that, forgetting the idea of him being with someone, that familiar feeling of a hole in your chest, sipping the beer, “You and... your wife?”

His lips slightly tug upward at your change in tone, “Of our divorce...”

“Oh,” your eyes widen the tiniest bit, swirling your drink. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” his eyes soften at your kind words. You’re good, too good. For him, anyway. “I walked in on her... and my brother, after coming home from work. One month after Winnifred was born, she was asleep that night, they did it just one room away from my little girl...” he clenches his fist around his bottle and the glass fractures. 

“She saw me and I didn’t say anything. I just looked at her. She said it was because I wasn’t angry that she was doing this. Because I never feel anything. I walked out, no emotion, nothing. So maybe she was right about that,” he laughs dryly, scratching the back of his neck, another strand falling across his face. “She left with him that night and I haven’t seen any of them since, maybe the occasional Facebook post of her and her new family but... all Winnie knows is that she’s gone, she asks me a lot if it’s her fault.”

“You don’t deserve that,” you say tenderly, as if cooing an injured animal, leaning forward. Your small shirt rides up slightly, revealing the soft pudge of your stomach when you reach out to put your comforting hand on his arm. He’s swept under your spell. “Winnifred doesn’t either.”

“It was tough at the time,” he admits honestly, baring his soul to you. “But I’ve moved on since, some things just aren’t...” you two lock eyes. “-meant to be, I guess.”

“She’s what we women like to call a cunt,” you tell him, your attempt to lighten up the mood. “Just look up the definition and you’ll see her picture, with your brother right behind her.”

He laughs, genuinely this time, eyes crinkling in the corners kind of laugh, the contagious one that gets you started too. It feels good, makes you both forget about your troubles. Just you two, under starlight, on this painted, wooden porch, in the beginning of June. Because you can’t be bothered with anything else.

“Thank you,” he praises, raising the bottle to his pink mouth. “I see why Winnifred adores you so much. It took dozens of some odd babysitters, but, hey, we got you now.”

“Well... I don’t normally swear around my bosses,” you flush in the slightest. 

“I’ll allow it just this once,” he takes a sip, looking at you from the corner of his eyes, lips wrapped around the rim and coated with liquor when they curl at the edges. 

“You’re too kind,” you breathe a chuckle and take your own sip, meeting eyes over a shared bottle of beer in both your fists. 

“You’re the first to say so.”

“With a heart like yours, Buck... I highly doubt that,” you stand up from the porch swing, backpack in hand again. No one’s called him that since Steve and girlfriends in the 40′s, but he likes the way you say it much better. He can just hear the smug voice of his best friend now. From when he called him while you were upstairs.

“You like her, Buck,” he told him, that damned smile searingly loud even over the phone. “I can tell, haven’t heard you talk about a dame like this since...” he paused. “Since no one, actually.”

“I can’t like her,” Bucky had reiterated, to himself mostly, trying to convince himself what his heart was telling him otherwise. “She babysits my kid, she’s ten years younger than me... she won’t like an old man like me.”

“Since when as age been an obstacle for you? And if we’re getting technical, it’s more like a 110 years younger.”

“Well it is now,” Bucky chuckled. “And since when have you been such a smartass?”

“I’ve had a good teacher,” he snarked. “Just give it a chance. Or the next time you gush about her, I’ll go and tell the doll myself.”

“You’re not allowed here after all that polite shit you drilled into my daughter’s head. She’s a little you now.”

“I taught her manners,” Steve laughed. “Sue me.”

“If I could... believe me, I would.”

“Thank you,” he looks up at you from where your standing. “For everything.”

“Of course,” you smile and he stands up himself, knowing he should go inside. “But I uh... I should get home, it’s getting late.”

“Yeah, I guess it is,” he finally realizes, stuffing his hands deep in his jeans pockets, like a lovestruck teenager all over again, unsure what to do. “And you know... as long as I’ve been around, one of the only benefits of being a super solider, I’ve never met someone that talks as much as you do.”

You laugh, flustered and bright from the summer night air biting at the button of your nose, “I don’t know whether to be flattered or insulted.”

“It’s a good thing,” he says and you gravitate towards each other. “I’ve gotten sick of the quiet.” 

You look down at your sneakers, “I’m glad I could be of service.”

You’re both so close, noses slight brushing when he’s inadvertently backed you up into the wooden railing. His hand opens and closes, before closing tightly into a fist. 

He looks you over, as if he’s holding himself back from reaching out, wanting so much of you, but it’s never enough, “Goodnight, y/n. Get home safely, alright?”

Your lips dip downward, a frown on your lips that he can’t help but take notice of when he dismisses you, but he wants to protect you. He doesn’t want to do something you both would regret. A monster like him.

You bounce back quickly with a small smile, “Oh, right. Goodnight, Mr. Barnes,” and your eyes linger on his face before you’re walking down the steps.

~~~

James walks through the backyard, it’s a hot summer day, now in mid July, and you and Winnifred are running through the sprinkler. Your bare feet slap against the wet grass, green on your heels. He watches how your skin glistens in the sun with sweat and sun screen, sun burned cheeks and hair that clings to your face in tendrils. He can’t keep his eyes off of you, a coral, pink bikini top and jean shorts, the slightest of bows tied at the top from your string bottoms. He itches to get his hands on it, to pull, to see the supple skin underneath. His eyes fall over the dips and curves of your breasts and hips, your waist, your ass. 

You run a hand over your hair, getting it out of your face and eyes to look at him with a brilliant, sunshine grin, wringing out the water in your locks, “Hey, you’re home early.”

“I-I got off a little early today because there was a heat warning, what are you guys doing outside?” he drops his work bag by the door and walks towards you both, arms folded over his chest.

“Playing in the sprinkler!” Winnifred answers, throwing her hands up, when the water hits her and she giggles freely. “Duh!”

“Really?” his eyebrows raise, mumbling smart aleck under his breath with a tiny, turned up smile. “And why is that?”

“Cause it’s fun,” you grin, crooked and bright. 

You walk over to him, extending your hand, and he looks at the gesture, suspicious, a teasing smile forming. “I won’t bite... I promise.”

You take his hand and pull him to you, stepping through the grass and stringing him along until you’re in the sprinkler and he’s soaked. His white Henley shirt clings to his tanned muscle and your eyes are anywhere but, too keep yourself sane. He looks at you, looming over, running a hand back through his slick hair, water droplets falling from his long lashes and he’s laughing, grabbing you and throwing you over his shoulder like a rag doll, one muscular arm wrapped around your legs. They dangle off his torso when you kick, punching his back to put you down, but your sides split from laughing, so loud and obnoxiously. 

“I wanna be carried! I wanna be carried!” Winnifred giggles excitedly, holding onto your foot where it’s hanging.

He sets you down, soft breasts to his hard chest, his hands on your waist when he puts you back on solid ground. You lock eyes with him and your fingers itch to reach out and touch him, run your hands through his hair and tug him closer to you. 

He opens his mouth to speak, inhaling sharply, “Y/n, I-”

“Y/n! He has cooties, come play with me instead!” Winnifred yells, loud and jumping up and down.

“You heard the girl,” you smile, sad and dreamy eyed. “You’re contagious.”

“Go on, then,” he laughs, looking at you like he’s about to say something again, but ultimately decided against it. Your face falls at the missed opportunity, “I’ll see you inside.”

~~~

Winnifred fell asleep across Bucky’s lap, curled up within herself under a weighted, fluffy blanket, head against his chest. You smile at the adorable moment, how his face has softened around her as the television drones on of a Disney movie you turned on that neither of you paid attention to. Ten minutes in and Winnifred was snoring away, dead asleep after laying on her father’s lap. 

“I’ll bring her upstairs,” he clears his throat as he picks her up, small against his broad and muscular frame. “If uh... you want to come with,” his lips kick up and you share it, both dreary and dog tired.

“Of course,” you yawn, stretching out your limbs, and you follow after him up the stairs, watching as he doesn’t struggle to carry her at all up the staircase.

You both step into her room as he lays her down in her Frozen themed, princess sized bed, Elsa and Anna on her pillow and large, cloudy blanket, fuzzy to the touch. She snuggles herself into the cozy mattress and smiles into her pillow, flushed with sleep and activity from the day. You and Bucky’s eyes meet over her, and to anyone on the outside looking in, you’re a happy, little family, the wholesome sitcom kind. 

He doesn’t mind that image at all.

The two of you walk out of the room after turning on her sound machine and glow worm night light, shutting the door softly behind you. You press your back against her door, hand still on the handle like it’s tethering you to reality, keeping you on solid ground. 

“This is probably... a really odd request but could you stay with me in bed... until I fall asleep?” he asks, bashful and hesitant. “I’ve been having these... night terrors lately, flashbacks, and it’s hard to sleep, so I thought maybe if someone was there with me, someone I trust then-”

“I’m happy to do it,” you smirk at his boyish smile and how timid he’s become all of a sudden, walking alongside him to his . “But if I fall asleep waiting for you to do it, don’t blame me.”

He chuckles, deep from his chest when he opens the door to his bedroom, leading you inside. You rush over and jump onto the mattress, plopping down on the soft blankets and pillows, watching him roll his eyes in a fond, affectionate sort of way that has your heart working overtime. He lays down beside you, chest rising and falling in one deep breath, none of you wanting to fall asleep despite your exhaustion. You want to savor the moment. Him and you so close.

You sit up, hair falling angelically over your face, a curtain over your eyes that shields you both from the outside world. His eyes drift to the soft pout of your lips, pink and how your tongue drags across the pillow of your bottom lip, curling at the edges when you see where his eyes lay. His eyes then drift off to what he hopes to be sleep, breathing slowing as he gracefully slips into slumber. You watch his hardened features soften as he does, lips parted ever so slightly, dark eyelashes kissing his cheeks, and you know that this is love.

It’s not more than fifteen minutes into his sleep that he shoots upright, sweat dripping down his face, coating his hair and skin, now matted on his clothes, and he’s hyperventilating, eyes glazed over with visions of his past. You wake up soon after, startled by his harsh breaths and incoherent mumbles, whispers of a former life.

“Please... please don’t. She’s all I have,” he says, voice breaking but at the same time he’s robotic, not awake, and a tear slips from his eye. He’s shaking in his covers and you know what he’s dreaming about. 

“Don’t hurt Winnifred, please, I’m the monster, not her. S-she shouldn’t be hurt, take me instead,” his heart seizes in his chest. He calls out your name in his tired voice, broken sobs escaping. 

You throw your arms around him, close to tears yourself, clutching him to your chest to wake him from the nightmare, cooing softly in his ear until his breathing calms and he’s silent.

“I’m okay, Winnifred’s okay, we just put her to bed, Buck. It’s just a dream, it’s not real...” you run a hand through his brunette locks, teasing the scalp and rubbing small stars into his back, bringing him slowly back in to the present and out of his own dark, warped thoughts. 

You move to put your hands on either side of his face, his eyes finally back to their normal glimmer, now awake. You brush your thumb against the stubble on his jaw, fingers massaging into the skin, “I’m here, just keep looking at me.”

He looks up at you, wide eyed and cautious of his every move, and to calm him down further, or possibly just to indulge your own wants, you kiss his forehead. Pressing lips against his cheek, his nose, his jaw, his temples, small groans escaping him when he takes your face in his hands and crashes his mouth against yours and it’s a symphony, harmony of moving lips. 

“No, no... we can’t,” he whispers, just barely in front of your lips. 

“Why?” you look at him, questioning.

“It-it’s not right...” he groans at the desperate expression on your face, hair mussed and lips swollen, throwing all caution to the wind. 

“Stop talking,” you silence him, shaking your head with a soft smile, and your lips are on his again.

He greedily swallows your moans when his hands fall down your body, each and every ample curve in the palm of his hand. His hands slides under your thighs, gripping the smooth flesh and picking you up so you straddle his hips, legs wrapped around him. You grind your ass into him, purring, his breath quickening along with your heaving chest. It’s hard to imagine, wanting something for so long and finally getting it, like reaching out for light and finally grasping it between your fingers, that starlight you’ve been searching for since that night on the porch with him. And it’s better than you dreamed it up to be. He breaks away, both of you open mouthed and you kiss the dimple that appears when his lips twitch upwards while looking at you.

You trail your fingers up his metal arm and he feels the pressure of your hand, the warmth of your skin and the sudden press of lips against the cool steel when you kiss his palm. 

He flips you both over so he’s above you, stubble scratching against your neck when he places sloppy, open mouthed kisses down your skin and sucks bruises on your most sensitive pulse points, a frenzy of tongue and teeth. A man untamed.

Bucky resurfaces and looks at you, lust and sincerity in his gaze, hungry, “Are you sure?”

“About what, Buck?”

“Us.”

“Unquestionably.”

[alchemist-shizun]

I saw you in a dream. (Then it came to an end.)

Read on Ao3!

Happy belated birthday to one of the best people in the world: @lance-alt! I promised I’d do something for you on Monday, but of course I have to make people wait for the juicy stuff. (read: the juicy stuff will be your tears after this, probably.) Love you bro!

General taglist: @whizzie72 @sapphire-knight @burningpersonflapsuitcase @softanxiouspatton @royallyanxious @kim-argent-moon @lance-alt (tell me if you want to be added or removed)

Taglist: @unsocialchapeau

Word Count: 2,626

Characters: mainly Remus, Logan, Deceit, Roman, (mentioned Virgil)

Pairing(s): onesided!Intrulogical, implied Loceit

Warning(s): Angst. So much angst. Also unresolved angst. Yelling, Swearing. Might be a bit ooc cause I can’t write Remus the way I’d like.

Summary: What do we not do for a loved one? What do we not do for the sake of a friendship? What do we not do to make sure we destroy ourselves in favor of others? And how exactly did Remus think he was going to be perfectly fine?

A/N: I am not sorry. This is a human AU btw. Enjoy! :3

❝Though I am bruised

Face of contusions

Know I’ll keep moving❞

Remus would have never blamed D.

It was middle school, and middle schoolers were widely known for their passion of brushing off specific people who didn’t appear quite as appropriate for themselves in their eyes.

He had always been a devastating tornado according to those around him, unable to be tamed unless given space to burst until not even a gentle breeze was left to tickle his skin.

D, on the other hand, knew how to be cool and poised, but that didn’t mean his nature was the one of an innocent puppy.

No, better yet, he was more like a domesticated beast.

That truly gave the teachers a hard time, because once combined they became inseparable and never really ceased to meddle with them.

And yet … students were most definitely inclined to avoid Remus at best, while when it came to D only curious and interested glances were given.

Remus would have never blamed him though, D didn’t even realize how far better they were treating him compared to his friend. He only focused on how close-minded people still were in there.

Who was he not to join in his complaining?

Everything would have been fine with him for as long as their friendship stayed that way. A messy supportive two-participants family.

It felt like a welcoming and roaring fire at the same time, the chaos they brought just with their understanding looks and smirks.

They knew they were going to end up with a long lasting friendship and they were proud to remind those around them by never losing sight of each other at school.

And it was okay that way, with only just D accepting him the way he was, he didn’t really need much else.

Until that cursed afternoon.

There was an extracurricular sort of contest their school held right after lessons every year, but Remus could barely remember what it even was about

All he remembered was that damned marvellous thoughtful and focused expression when he looked a bit to his left to the boy sitting next to him.

Oh, the irony.

It had been right then that it had hit him. That maybe … maybe there was already something else. A something that transformed into something more with every little bit of interaction they shared.

Roman knew him, they were in the same class, and he had to complain at least once a day about how unnerving the guy was, always challenging him do debates Roman was so inclined to win that it took a third party member, Virgil, to separate them.

How the three of them were still close friends after three years was still a mystery to many.

So that was when he first heard about Logan.

But his brother and him weren’t exactly known for having the safest household in the world, so inviting friends over was a hard no. Then, the actual first time Remus had seen him was when he entered middle school that year.

At first he hadn’t obviously realized his crush, but after he had spent the minimal amount of time with Logan, it was so blatant that even he couldn’t deny it to himself.

He could have also labelled it as the first time someone other than his brother and D had recognized him as another human other than a weird poltergeist to avoid. There was a way he spoke with that low tone and thoughtful arguments that would have probably made him melt right on the spot. Or maybe it was his sharp features, or the way he thought he had looked at him that one time.

Remus was deep down the river at the base of the cliff, the tip of his hair barely managing to be untouched by the water.

Damn Roman. Damn Roman and his storytelling, and how Remus had always rooted for Logan in their discussions, how he had already taken a liking into him and had already doomed himself.

It was break, fifteen minutes of pure relaxation, and Remus and D had already spent the first five minutes together, trying to get away from the stress of the ending of the first term.

D’s eyes lit up as they turned a corner, Remus followed his gaze as he spoke.

« Hey! Why is this the first time I see you since school started? » a toothy smile displayed on his lips. It was almost as bright as the one he reserved to him.

« Your cousin is impossible to move from his seat. » Logan’s crystalline voice cleared. « So Roman and I mostly stay in class with him. »

« Ugh, » D rolled his eyes. « I apologize on his behalf. » he didn’t hide the fond tone when he talked, though.

« No, it’s quite alright by us. » had he ever not turned to Remus, maybe he wouldn’t have regretted meeting Logan in the long run. « Oh, I didn’t even introduce myself properly the other day. » he stretched out his hand. « I am Logan. »

« I know. »

Panic.

Fuck. Fuck what did you just say, why. Now he’ll think you’re creepy, too.

D put an arm around his shoulders. « Yeah, he’s Roman’s brother. » perhaps a saviour? « And sometimes he’s just as dense as him. »

Remus scoffed. « Lies. I’m a better idiot than him. »

That got a chuckle out of both. He felt delighted.

As he saw Logan about to withdraw his hand, Remus took it almost instantly.

Oh my god what the fuck are you doing?

« I’m Remus. » the bell rang and maybe his ears were too.

« My pleasure. » Logan conceded before letting go and starting to backtrack to his class. « I’ll see you two around. »

And as fast as he arrived, he was gone.

Like a blurry hallucination or those spots you see when you get up too fast from the couch.

The rest of the day-

Well, he didn’t remember much anymore.

Maybe the fact that he and Logan did actually have something in common.

When there was a group of three, there would always be the two that shared the stronger chemistry. And if Logan didn’t feel as close to Roman and Virgil, Remus sure as heck knew if anyone interacted with D and him, he would have felt like something was off most of the times.

There were flashes of memories that crossed his mind ever since Logan had left middle school to start his first year of high-school.

Most were all the meet ups they had with D during break, the glances he caught and buried deep down in his heart, the laughter of all three of them, how their dynamics colliding were actually definitely working well together.

What he remembered mostly were the furtive tears that were shed on their last day.

He never told D about that.

It was when he went home that he couldn’t have hidden it from Roman any longer. His brother had affirmed that he had been crying even more than himself, which was saying a lot.

So the words came out like a destructive flood, deleting with a burning strength all the hopeful thoughts.

« Rem, listen here. » Roman, thankfully, had spoken up before his mind would have travelled down risky paths. « Not seeing each other almost everyday doesn’t mean you won’t be friends any longer. »

He had only looked up from the pavement. Were he to look back at this memory years after he’d have thought himself to be pathetic.

« And you can definitely meet after school whenever you want. If our parents won’t let you, I’ll come with. »

And that they did, slowly trying to gain their parents’ trust to let them go out by themselves until they were both attending high-school.

Another three years would have passed before the lethal “last day” would come again, but the trio made sure to imprint the best memories together while they had the time.

Only that the most unexpected things happen at the worst times.

Remus and D were both in the third year; things seemed to be going smoothly as ever, between all the tests and mental breakdowns for said tests, Remus would have never thought to cross the threshold of his school and be met with loud yelling not too further away from his class.

Normally he wouldn’t have really cared much.

Unless the two subjects were Logan and D. Which they were. Which had also made him pale with a horrible feeling in his guts.

He couldn’t make out what they were saying as the screaming in his thoughts didn’t leave him alone.

« MIT, Logan. Seriously! You’re insane! »

« I had my reasons! »

D scoffed and put his face in his hands for a beat. « Refusing because of your friendships is not a valid reason! »

Remus was confused. He really didn’t want to be there at all.

« It is when you don’t want to lose them. »

« You wouldn’t have, you idiot! »

« Guys what’s- »

« There is a reason if we’re friends! »

« -going …? » he could see the profound rage in D’s caramel irises. One glance and you’re dead.

« You didn’t trust us to maintain our friendship, did you? Is that why you refused the international internship? »

« That’s absurd, that’s not what I mean! »

« It sounds a lot like it’s exactly what you mean! »

Remus connected the dots.

Friendship. MIT. International internship. Logan had refused to be an intern abroad only because of them. He had been too afraid to loose them as friends if he were to be away too long.

And, of course, D was mad about his lost opportunity. He would have never admit it at that moment, but he felt guilty, too.

« You sure talk a lot and pretend you’re smart but, really, you’re just as stupid sometimes. »

The look in Logan’s eyes changed.

Oh no. Oh no no no no.

« Fine then. I’ll keep on being stupid on my own. » he walked away in a instant, steps long and furious, opposing the low tone of his voice, but matching the seething fire in his chest.

« D- »

« Please, don’t. » D looked at him with broken eyes. « I’m fine. We’re fine. I’ll see you during break, okay? »

Remus only nodded and headed to his own class. He pretended he didn’t feel awful as he walked by the door to Logan’s own class.

It was as D said. Fine.

Everything was going to be okay.

Except it wasn’t, because that was the last time both of them talked with Logan.

The two wouldn’t even look at each other and Remus couldn’t help but side with D. That meant he wouldn’t have interacted with the older boy either.

And so time passed … months. Avoiding each other when all you ever wanted was to share at least a single word.

It wasn’t okay. It wasn’t fine at all, it hurt so much and Remus didn’t know how longer he would have been able to handle it.

Yet, he was too afraid to do anything. He wouldn’t have wanted to loose D’s friendship too because of a reckless action. And he did lots of them. So, for once, he stayed put and let the Fates do their work.

Which ended into the fight remaining unresolved, Logan graduating from high-school and both of them never meeting him again.

Roman had tried to bring up the argument multiple times, but Remus had decided to bury everything deep down and avoid ever bringing it up.

Like a ghost, Logan appeared to exist only in his mind. A mind that he didn’t seem to want to leave. Even despite all that had been going down his ridiculously tough teenage life.

Remus and D had no idea how they made it through the final exams.

They also had no clue how they almost completely lost contact after the beginning of university.

Maybe it wasn’t loneliness he felt after that. Maybe it was more disappointment.

It wasn’t like it was anyone’s fault, though. Their lessons never matched, so during the week it was almost impossible to meet, sometimes they had jobs in the weekend to pay for apartments nearby their universities.

Texts became a burden they both forgot to remember to answer, it was as if anything was a priority to socializing and it was driving them insane.

Even sad.

Then one day, out of the blue, D had texted him in a way he hadn’t done in too long. He sounded greatly excited and he had told Remus he needed to meet him as soon as possible.

He had a surprise!

Remus was radiant that day, finally getting the chance he deserved to recover their friendship.

It was a Friday afternoon, he was walking down the street towards the place they had agreed on to meet.

D was right in front of him. But enough meters away so that he couldn’t recognize yet the person walking alongside him. Remus narrowed his eyes, almost squeezing them shut at some point. Did the sun have to be so bright right above them that day?

He put a hand on his forehead to shield his vision.

He wished he didn’t.

Not because the guy next to D was Logan.

Not because his heart made three somersaults before twisting one last time as though he fell in love all over again at once, hitting his chest like a violent wind in a snowstorm.

Not because he was smiling so wide his face would have fallen off any second.

But because, as his eyes focused and examined their figures, he noticed the details.

Like their joined hands, fingers intertwined the way he would have wanted to but had never been brave enough to do.

How they looked lovingly at each other before turning back to him.

His own smile faltering for a second and then going back as it was before. Normal, sure, but fake. Fake, but not blatant enough to be discovered.

He couldn’t do this to them.

And sure he was going to be happy for them right? They had been friends. He was going to survive by internalizing everything in himself, right? He was going to forget about all his feelings in favour of his closest friends. That was the right thing to do.

It happened to everyone.

It did.

He could survive.

Hurting in the process, but he could.

The day went by in an instant, a terrible, calamitous and painstakingly long instant in which he hoped he had been hallucinating all along.

Remus had wiped everything he had seen while on his way home. He forcefully removed any kind of thought in his head so he could bask in the numbness until the silent chaos of the world around him stopped making sense.

He threw the door to his home open.

Except that it wasn’t his home and that he had somehow gotten to Roman’s own apartment, red eyes adorning his face in a brutally doleful expression.

His brother was immediately at his side, arms wrapped around his chest, with an understanding look in his eyes and anticipation for the tears to come.

He had known about Logan and D getting together before Remus, so he had seen something like that coming.

Yet Roman didn’t know it would’ve hit him hard too, seeing his brother so broken.

So he let Remus cry his soul out, while nothing else could have been done.

Dreaming, perhaps.

That was all he had left.

[captain-black-water]

I’chi “Black Water” Tia

The Basics ––– –

Age: Thirty-seven

Race: Seeker of the Sun Miqo’te/Highlander Hyur

Gender: Male

Sexuality: Gay

Marital Status: Single

Server: Mateus - Crystal

Physical Appearance ––– –

Hair: Thick black hair with a constant shine. He doesn’t care for it as often as he should, usually letting it get slick with grease and sea salt until someone negs him enough to do something about it. When down his hair reaches down to about his midsection but, more often than not, he will usually put his hair up in some thickly bound braids that he then bundles in a knot.

Eyes: A keen feline yellow, with the trademark Seeker pupils. However, his right eye is marred by a cloudy texture. A birth defect that labels him as blind at a glance. Though his left eye is without this distinctive feature, it’s certainly no more capable of focusing on any one detail.

Height: 6′3″

Build: Broad chested, with well-defined muscle. I’chi keeps himself well in shape, focusing mostly on his naturally strong Miqo’te legs and his chest.

Distinguishing Marks: One of the first things anyone might notice about I’chi are the tattoos that decorate his face. They resemble the stripes of a tiger, turning his already intimidating features all the more grim and fearsome. But those aren’t his only tattoos. On his back, I’chi sports the image of a white tiger immerging from the depths of a black sea, surrounded by brilliantly marbled koi and vibrant orange petals. The colors are vivid and distinct with strong black lines, perhaps so that I’chi himself might be able to see them in a mirror’s reflection.

Common Accessories: I’chi finds himself in many different outfits but one accessory that he maintains throughout all of them is the gold earring near the tip of his right ear. It is sometimes, but not always, accompanied by some other rings that don’t shine quite as brightly.

Personal ––– –

Profession: Self-employed. I’chi runs the show that provides the downtrodden and poor with what they need to survive and get back on their feet, employing the street rats of Eorzea’s major cities to keep their eyes and ears open. He learns and deals with secrets, often using what intelligence he gathers to blackmail and bring down corrupt nobles and politicians in Ul’dah. Meanwhile, in Limsa Lominsa, he anonymously provides the Maelstrom with tips and information on criminals within their jurisdiction. Any gil I’chi earns through his efforts - often taken from those who stole it to begin with - is redistributed to those in need. None of these dealings, however, are public knowledge and he does not speak of these dealings openly.

Hobbies: In his free time, I’chi occupies his time by drinking or getting himself into someone else’s bed. Often both at once. There’s no better way for him to forget about the past than to be too busy finding pleasure in the present. 

Residence: Owns a home in Shirogane known as “Tiger Lily Cottage” where he often frequents and stays during his visits to the Far East. He as well owns a rundown and abandoned mansion somewhere within Thanalan, given the deed to the place after the owner passed away. He’s done little to nothing with the places, aside from paying it the occasional visit.

Birthplace: Details of where I’chi was born are unknown to him, but his best guess is wherever the I tribe of Miqo’te make their home. He never bothered to learn where that may be.

Patron Deity: Llymlaen.

Fears: True vulnerability. Getting too close to someone. His past. Being submerged underwater. Losing what very little sight he still has. 

Relationships ––– -

Spouse: Negative

Children: N/A

Parents: Miqo’te Mother, Deceased. Highlander Hyur Father, MIA.

Siblings: Yes, though he doesn’t know of where they are or if they’re still alive. None share his mixed heritage.

Other Relatives: Yes but, similar to the above, he doesn’t know them. Nor does he wish to.

Pets: Some fish back home in Shirogane.

Traits ––– -

Extroverted / In Between / Introverted

Disorganized / In Between / Organized

Close Minded / In Between / Open Minded

Calm / In Between / Anxious

Disagreeable / In Between / Agreeable

Cautious / In Between / Reckless

Patient / In Between / Impatient

Outspoken / In Between / Reserved

Leader / In Between / Follower

Empathetic / In Between / Apathetic

Optimistic / In Between / Pessimistic

Traditional / In Between / Modern

Hard-working / In Between / Lazy

Cultured / In Between / Uncultured

Loyal / In Between / Disloyal

Faithful / In Between / Unfaithful

Additional information ––– –

Themes and more: For the comfort and well being of all involved, it is very important that I make clear some potentially triggering subjects. I’chi’s past deals with themes of sexual violence, other non-violent sexual situations, parental death, murder, and strong language. Additionally, I’chi himself deals with depression and copes poorly through alcoholism and non-violent sexual acts. All that being said, I roleplay I’chi lightheartedly and save the darker themes for when I am sure that those participating in the roleplay are comfortable exploring those heavier themes. Just as people in the real world are flawed and multidimensional, so too is I’chi (or at least that’s how I hope to depict him), which means there are some things to his character that are rightfully considered to be bad. I will not fault anyone for only wishing to see the lighthearted side of I’chi’s character.

What I’m Looking For: I’m hoping to broaden my horizons as a roleplayer by roleplaying with many different people and experiencing new and interesting situations! I am always open to making friends and discussing potential plot ideas. I appreciate many different themes, but I would lying if I said I didn’t have a preference. While I can enjoy comedic and lighthearted stories, I find I am only ever truly invested in those with emotional weight, nuance, and depth. I prefer dark and/or romantic themes, but not so much in that I crave constant edge and agony or only erotic entanglements. Balance, y’know? Most of all, I have a story for I’chi that I wish to see unfold, and I want to welcome others to join me in telling that story - and yours too!

RP Hooks ––– –

Black Water: I’chi was raised amongst the Bloodtides crew under the careful watch of their captain, a man who held the title of “Black Water”. Under Black Water’s command, I’chi and the rest of the Bloodtides laid siege to many innocents, earning their name by turning the tide’s red with blood. Around the time I’chi entered his adulthood he began to plot to overthrow the reigning Black Water and usurper his title, successfully convincing enough of the crew to join him in his bloody revolution. His actions left the Bloodtides fewer in numbers, yet I’chi’s reign as the new Black Water led the crew to riches untold. However, as fate would have it, I’chi’s time as captain was cut short as he was done in by the same fate as the Black Water before him. Although he survived being tossed overboard with weights strapped to his arms and legs, his reputation did not. I’chi was declared dead and, though he later showed his face again to the Maelstrom that sought his head, the people were content to let that be the end of his story. Perhaps your character was affected by the Bloodtides at some point in their life, either before, during, or after I’chi’s reign as Black Water. Perhaps your character was one of the Bloodtides on his crew. Or perhaps you simply knew the legends as they were so often told around Limsa’s docks. Either way, there are plenty of different avenues to explore with this legacy!

White Tiger: One might think that I’chi being as large and distinctive as he is might be why the eyes of Kugane’s citizens can’t seem to look away, but the name they whisper under their breath tells a different story. The tale of the ‘White Tiger of Kugane’ they mutter to those not in the know. A tale regaling the exploits of one beastly figure, more animal than man, whose loyalties they cannot disconcern. They speak of how he once worked as the muscle for a gang of criminals who terrorized Kugane’s merchants, taking a cut from their profits in exchange for the kindness of leaving them and their wares be. But suddenly, one day, the White Tiger turned his blade on the very master that held their leash. He severed their head from their shoulders on the city streets, turning his white coat red and stirring panic and awe in the people. As the authorities gave chase, he led them back to where the criminals made their home, vanishing from sight and leaving the others to take the fall. His actions freed the people from a threat they could not oppose on their own, and for that they are grateful. But were his actions truly selfless? Your character may have had a run-in with I’chi during this time in his life, or maybe they were witness to his infamous deed. Perhaps they only know the legend. I am open to discussing any connections, just let me know!

Contact Information/About the player ––– –

Hello, and thank you for reading this far! My name is Blake, and you can usually find/contact me here or on I’chi Tia on Mateus. Btw I 100% stole this format from my friend Speedie, who you can find here. I keep a bit of an odd, migrating schedule, but I am always happy to make room for some RP whenever we can make it work! 

[punkcupcakestyles]

Love Song

Part 8

“And what happens when I fall in love with you, Harry?”

“If one of us is gonna fall in love, it’s gonna be me.”

Catch Up!

BTW: I gotta say a big huge thank you to @for-fucks-sake-h for this one 

I didn't want to do this. I wanted to go home, and maybe hide under my bed. That was all I wanted to do. 

Fuck. 

I wasn't in the mood. 

"Sorry," I whispered after what it felt like an eternity of silence, Harry looking at me patiently from the door. "S'not your fault. I was the one that said yes to this stupid thing.”

His jaw clenched just a bit. It was hard to miss, the hinge of it popping out of his already structured faces. That was a thing about him: He was so sharp around the edges, it was almost impossible for him not to cut deep. 

"Want out?" He asked simply, but just that was enough to make my stomach drop.  

Such a good question: Did I want out? I probably should. 

"That's Midge's decision," I replied softly. It was easier to say than the turmoil of words that flooded my mind. 

"That's bullshit." My eyes met his, and at that moment I couldn't decide if his smile was sour or sweet, if he was being sarcastic, or he was mad cause I wasn't saying what he wanted me to say. I didn't know him at all. For a brief moment, I felt the urge to fix that. To take back my words, and make him smile just like he did in the morning, and find out every little detail there was to know about him. Did he wash his hair with warm water? Did he put sugar in his coffee? I didn’t know that. 

"Think whatever you want, Harry," I shrugged instead, forcing myself to get up from the bed. "I need to get ready, I have a busy day."

He didn't move, looking at me as I made my way to the bathroom. I could feel the energy of the room prickling on the tips of my fingers, running through my body with each step closer. It was suffocating. 

And I almost made it safe and sound into the bathroom. But his fingers wrapped around my wrist as I walked by him, pulling me back softly as he did so. 

And I knew he meant no harm. I knew. I still couldn’t help the panic that exploded in my chest, and that put me on high alert. Quickly, I scanned the room, looking for ways out: the window was a no go, we were on the 7th floor. He was blocking the door, and something told me he was a lot stronger than he looked.  

I was full-on panicking, the air stuck in my throat. It felt like an elephant had decided to sit on my chest and I was pinned to the floor. I couldn't get up, or think, or breathe, just sink to the floor. It felt like the world was burning and I was standing in the middle of it, fully aware that I needed to run, and unable to do so. Useless as always. 

“S…” Harry whispered as if he were talking to a wounded animal, afraid that it might launch into attack if he wasn't careful. I peered back at him he released my wrist and put his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants. 

He had noticed the fear that was prickling on my skin, there was no doubt about it, and he was making himself smaller to calm me down. I had seen my mom do the same a bunch of times before. Only I was not a ball of fire, spitting danger around me just for the fun of it. 

He had nothing to be afraid of. 

And he knew that much, cause he smiled, patiently waiting until I turned fully around to look at him. 

“Are you ok?” He asked.

I wasn't. I felt tired and dizzy. All of the energy that had electrified me seconds before was now draining out of me. 

“Yeah…” I said in a voice that didn't feel like my own. It was hoarse and soft like I could burst into tears at any moment now. 

He took a step closer and his shoulders relaxed visibly as I looked at him in the eyes. Soon, his cold fingers were on my clammy neck, and his thumb was caressing my cheek. I smiled at the touch and closed my eyes as I allowed myself to lean closer to him. 

“I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m sorry,” he muttered. 

“S’okay. It’s a bad habit of mine,” I said in the same low voice, worried that if I spoke up, I would cry. I let him pull me closer until my forehead was resting on his chest and he was all I could feel. His fingers drew soft circles on my back, as I meekly let my hands wrap around his waist. Every little touch sent a new shiver down my spine, excitement bubbling in my tummy as if my own body knew what was coming, and simply couldn't wait any longer. “You smell nice," I mumbled as I nuzzled my nose against his skin, taking him in for just a little longer.

A moment of silence took over the room, and I found myself wishing I could take all of it back, that I hadn't said a single thing, and just let it be. It was all going so well. 

"Want out, S?" Harry's words rumbled in his chest, sweet and alluring, and oh, how good it felt to hear him. “You can tell me, I’ll even take the blame.”

"Harry...don't."

"S..."

"Don't." I finally untangled myself from him, taking a step back to look at him. “Please, don't do this. I really can't risk it."

"Do what? Risk what?" He asked, his voice getting louder. 

"Everything!! I have everything to lose and you don't understand! You come here thinking this is all a fucking game. But it's not, Harry, not to me."

"So let's end this, Sofia."

"No!" I bit my bottom lip as it rolled into my mouth and gazed up at him. The whole world was blurred at the edges, and all I could see was him, all I could sense and care about. The only problem was that nothing else made sense. "Please..." I begged. 

The world slowed down and I could see everything playing out in slow motion. We were right at the part of the movie where the protagonist remembers the biggest tragedy of her life. 

Harry's jaw clenched, but if he had anything to say, he chose not to. He took a few steps away from me and left, even when I could feel the uncertainty that was eating him up. 

For a couple of seconds, I couldn't move. My knees were too weak and my mind was too fuzzy to attempt to do so, so I stayed put, balling my fist tightly and blinking the tears away. It was all I could do not to crumble to the insidious feeling making a home of my tummy.  

***

A tragedy: Due to bad weather conditions, my crew had been delayed in LAX and was just now getting to New York. 

An even bigger tragedy: I might have to do my own hair for national TV. 

It was honestly hard to care. 

Diana kept pacing around the room as she gave me instructions on how to behave during the interview: “smile”, “look at the public when telling a story”, “be relatable: no one wants to know you owned a pony...Or a yacht.” Ordering me around was her way to calm herself down. 

I had already done my makeup. I had learned a few tricks along the way on how to make my eyes look bigger and enhance the natural plumpness of my lips. I knew that if I put a tiny bit of blush on my nose I’d look more lively and that my eyebrows looked way better if they were kind of bushy and thick. 

It also gave me something to do, the opportunity to distract myself from the stupid sadness that had sunk in my chest. Cause Harry wasn’t there, and some part of me wanted him to be. I was expecting to see him when I arrived at the studio, with his smirk and careless attitude, leaning onto a wall while he chatted with someone. I was craving to see him, actually, and for him to take my hand when he realized I was a nervous mess, just like he had done when we were on the plane to New York. But it wasn't like I could blame him for choosing not to see me. 

“You ok? They’re about to get here, you’ll make it just fine,” Diana assured me right after she checked the time one last time. 

“Yeap.”

“You sure?”

“Yeap...where’s Harry? I figured he’d be here.” I tried to sound casual like I didn’t care. I tried to hide the fact that I felt like a balloon that had just been punctured a tiny little hole, and was deflating slowly. 

“He...uh, he is back to work. He wanted me to let you know that he’s going to go on a bit of a tour, traveling around the world to show his friends his new album before releasing it. He just...decided to do it a bit earlier.”

“Oh.”

“He will go to London, Tokyo, Paris, Rome, everywhere, really, but he will allow us to use his image to feed the press about your relationship if that’s what you want.”

“Oh,” I repeated, like the idiot I was. 

“And he also wants you to know you’re welcome to join him in any city you want. Your choice. He was very adamant that you get to decide. Not me, not Midge, but you."

“Oh…”

“You’re going on a tv show, Sofia. I need you to start saying actual words,” Diana snapped at me, and I let the corners of my mouth twitch, offering her a quick and sour smile before walking away as they called my name. 

The show was about to start.

I didn’t even get to fixing my hair. 

***

“So, the game’s pretty simple,” Jimmy Fallon smiled at me as we both stood in front of a line of shots. “I ask you a question and you can either answer it or take the shot.”

“Oh, that doesn’t sound dangerous at all.”

“Just a warning, though. We’ve heard you hate the taste of pineapple, so one of these is a pina colada. And we’ve heard you’re allergic to peppermint, so we’ve made you a mojito. Let’s do this! First question for a chocolate martini: you can choose any guy in the world to spend the rest of your life, or you can spend one night with Rihanna. Which one you choose?”

“Rihanna. Can I still have the martini?”

“Sure. Second question for the pina colada…”

“Shit. That is strong!”

“I told you so. Second question: bang, marry, kill: Noah Centineo, which rumor has it will be your love interest in your next movie; Jacob Elordi, who you were pretty heavy with during your last movie; and Harry Styles, cause he’s Harry Styles and I like him.”

“Yeah, I’m gonna have that drink…”

***

New York, with its hectic schedules and the endless string of public outings, was finally over and I was back home. 

I much rather be in L.A., and all of its chaos, endless meetings with Diana and Midge revising screenplays and projects, long hours spent on hair and make-up, and even longer days in photoshoots. It didn’t matter, cause I was home, and I could lie in bed with my mom when she got back from the hospital, and bake with Cat and watch movies with Sam. 

One thing was the same, though: No Harry. 

It had been two weeks since I last saw him, that awful morning in New York, and he hadn’t texted, called or talked to me since then, not even a stupid message through Diana. 

It was starting to be painful. 

Fuck. 

“Honey, you’re not being very useful,” my mom smiled at me, pushing an onion my way, so I would dice it. It was the first task she had given me since I sat down to watch her cook, and I sighed sorrowfully before I put myself to work. 

My mom cooked when she was happy. When we were growing up, and Cat was just a baby, she would cook every day, she baked cookies, and made pasta from scratch, or curry for dinner. My favorite was the Khao Soi, a soup recipe she learned back when she lived in Thailand for a couple of months before she married my dad. My mom was adventurous and happy when she was young, and it was hard to even imagine how she turned into the shy and reserved adult she was.  

I would come back from school and run to the kitchen to help her, even if it meant just stopping Cat from getting things into her mouth. I loved the smell in the air and the fact that she would allow me to eat the cookie dough, or taste the sauces. We would sing and laugh, and I never noticed the fact that she was always wearing long-sleeved shirts, even during the hottest days of summer, or how sometimes she covered a side of her face with her long hair. 

Ignorance was blissful. 

She was in a good mood today, it was Sam’s birthday, and we were making Rigatoni Alla Harry, his favorite dish. I was pretty sure he had asked for it just to spite me, so he could make a funny face every time he mentioned the name of the dish, which he did, constantly and unnecessarily. 

I had offered him whatever he could want: a quick trip to Paris? He got it; to party until he couldn’t remember his name? I would’ve paid for it in a heartbeat; a fancy watch with his name engraved on it? I couldn’t even imagine why he would want that for, but I would’ve bought it. Instead, he chose to spend the day in and to cook his own dinner with my mom. He couldn’t get any better.

I was only halfway through the onion when my phone started to buzz on the counter. I looked up and realized my mom was already giving me an exasperated look. “We already had this discussion, Sofia. Family time is sacred”, her voice rang in the back of my mind. I smiled apologetically and quickly picked it up before she would actually say the words. 

It was Diana, texting me from her trip back home, where she was visiting her parents. I wasn’t the only one having trouble with boundaries. 

@D

I think it’s time for us to make a little trip.

Btw, I loved your outfit yesterday. 

Her text came with a link to a magazine, one of those gossipy ones that I hated so much. For a second, I hesitated. I didn’t want to know what was being told. Most often than not, it was bullshit, but it still messed with my head. 

I finally opened it, closing my eyes as a rush of anxiety ran through my veins. What could I had possibly done? I couldn’t think of a single thing, I was the most boring person on earth.  

I shouldn’t have.

LOVE IS IN THE AIR

Spotted: Harry Styles and Camille Rowe having a fun night out in London, with a few friends. The on-and-off couple looked cozy while having dinner, with Styles' arm draped around the beautiful model for most of the night. According to sources, he’s beyond happy to be back with his muse for his long-awaited second album. 

Who’s not so happy about this recent development? Well, that would be Hollywood darling Sofia Walsh-De La Rosa, who was dating Styles up until very recently. The actress is said to be heartbroken…

The actress felt...empty. 

I knew I should’ve been pissed, but it was hard when there was a void where my heart was supposed to be. And intense sadness that had nothing to hold on to, so it was expanding everywhere else. 

I felt sick. 

My fingers kept scrolling through the article without really reading the words. I only stopped when I realized there was a photo posted. They were so beautiful, both of them, that it was hard to look away anyway. He was gorgeous, almost painfully so, and I could feel a fluttering feeling in my chest as I looked at him. He was walking out of the restaurant, frowning and looking down at the floor, while she was behind him, almost hiding from the camera. They made a fucking beautiful couple, there was no denying it. No wonder he still wanted her. 

@D

Get ready. I’ll get back tomorrow. We’re leaving in the afternoon.

***

It wasn’t my choice. It was never going to be. 

We got to London in the early afternoon, and it was raining, so we went straight into the car, a black SVU with tinted windows. Tired as I was, I closed my eyes and fell asleep on D’s shoulder, while she checked her email on her phone and muttered quick reminders to herself. 

I didn’t even notice when we arrived at our destination, a tall, black building with reflective glass in downtown London. It didn’t have a name on it, but it looked modern and expensive and Diana rushed to it, trying to avoid the rain that was starting to pour down. I followed her inside, squealing as my foot fell into a puddle of water and my white converse got soaked. 

I looked rattled, to say the least. Diana hadn’t allowed me to go to the hotel first, so I tried to rake my fingers through my hair, so it wouldn’t get puffy because of the rain. I also shifted on my feet, already uncomfortable by my wet shoe.

The old man sitting by the reception desk didn’t bat an eye when he saw us. He looked at me from head to toe disapprovingly, and with a sigh, he let us in. It was almost as if he was used to seeing people walking around looking like crazy. 

The building was some sort of artists’ studio, with paintings and graffitis all over the walls. It was exactly the kind of place where you would expect to have a sudden stroke of genius. 

I followed Diana into the elevator and we remained in awkward silence as we went up to the 7th floor. I was about to ask her where the hell were we when the bell rang, and the doors opened to a floor full of recording booths. 

It wasn’t until that moment when my half-asleep brain caught up with the fact that we were in Harry’s territory. And I was about to see him. We walked down the hallway to the very last booth. From the looks of it, it was the biggest one and the only one with a key card door. Diana knocked on it and my heart picked up the pace as I heard the steps coming. 

Music was playing in the room when Jeff opened the door and he looked at us in surprise, as if he couldn’t possibly remember he had guests over. He blinked a few times, right before his eyes traveled from Diana to me, and he stepped aside to let us in. 

“Harry’s in the back,” he murmured when I walked in. I nodded and went straight to the semi-open door in the back of the room. 

It was where music was coming from, a soft ballad sang in a slow, chocolatey way. It was alluring and sexy in a way I couldn’t describe. I couldn’t put a name to the feeling that bubbled in my tummy at the sound of it. 

Harry didn’t notice when I walked into the room, not for a while anyway. He was wearing a blue sweater and dark blue jeans, and his hair was a bit shorter than I remembered it. He was focused on the music, frowning lightly as he moved his head to the rhythm of it. 

“I like the song,” I said after a while, calling for his attention as he still hadn’t noticed my arrival. Harry was already smiling when he turned around and I felt like a billion butterflies were fluttering in my tummy at the sight of him. 

“Hey,” was all he said, but it was enough to ignite a spark in my chest. 

“Hi. It’s really good.”

“Makes you wanna fuck the singer?” He asked, and I had to hold my breath as I watched him take a couple of steps closer and lean over me to close the door behind me. It was just the two of us now, no Jeff or Diana to listen to us. “It’s kind of what I’m going for.”

“I wouldn’t know, I have a boyfriend,” I whispered in response. There was no need to speak up, he was so close, I could feel his breath, and the tickles of the ghost of his lips on mine. 

“Oh, then does it make you wanna fuck your boyfriend?” he smirked, dimples showing on his cheeks as he kissed me. 

Neither of us was in any rush. His hands traveled to my waist, as the weight of his body pushed me back to the door, trapping me there while his tongue grazed my bottom lip. I sighed, giving in to the kiss as my knees started to tremble. 

It almost felt like he missed me, the taste of my lips and the shape of my body was making up for the lost time. He explored my mouth and allowed me to suck on his lips, the pressure of his fingers growing as he pulled me closer. 

I forgot what I was there for, forgot about the photo and the gossip and the fact that he was back with his ex. I only cared about his kiss and the way he was holding me. 

His nose bumped against mine when he broke the kiss and a shy smile spread on his lips, looking at me as his fingers pressed lightly to my neck. 

“I thought you weren’t coming,” he muttered.

“I wasn’t.”

“Too bad, cause I kinda missed you.”

“I’m not so sure about that,” I smiled softly at him. “I think you’ve been doing just fine without me.”

“S.” My name came out of his lips like an annoyed grunt, followed by an exasperated sigh. “I didn’t get back with her.”

“You don’t owe me any kind of explanation, H.”

“I do!” He urged. “And I need you to believe me: I didn’t get back with her and I didn’t fuck or kiss her or anything. I’ve been a fucking saint since that morning.”

“Why do you need me to believe you?”

“I have no fucking idea, S. I just need you to. I need you to trust me.”

“I trust you.”

“Good.” His smile was bright and sincere and a little bit relieved. And it took a lot of effort not to kiss him again.

“You don’t have to be a saint, though,” I blurted out when his back was already facing me and he was looking for his phone on the control table. “That’s not what this is about.”

“I know,” he smiled in response. 

“Maybe we shouldn’t kiss anymore,” I forced myself to continue, now that I had the strength in me. “Not when we’re alone.”

“We’ve had this conversation before, babe.”

“Yes, and we keep ignoring it.” And because of it, my heart imploded when I saw a photo of him with another woman. “So maybe we shouldn’t do that anymore.”

“Are you scared you might fall in love with me?” He asked rather cockily. 

“I’ve seen what love does to people, H, so ‘terrified’ would be a better word to use,” I said to his surprise. “I think I should go take a shower. I’ll be at the hotel.”

I wasn’t expecting him to take my hand, or to look at me like a lost child that wasn’t so sure about what he was going to do next. 

“Don’t go to a hotel, S. Stay with me.”

“H…”

“Just tonight. You can sleep at your hotel tomorrow.” 

“Why?” I chuckled.

“It’ll be nice to spend some time with you, just us. I’ll bet we’re gonna have to do a lot of things just for show these days. I’ll be good,” he promised. 

How could I say no?

***

His bed was soft. 

I was supposed to be taking a shower. Harry had left me in his room so I could have some privacy, but I kept staring at his bed, soft and warm, as it called my name. 

Just 10 minutes. 

I stripped down to my underwear, letting my clothes pool down on the floor, and sat down on the bed, letting out a relieved sigh, before I lay down and got myself under the covers. I was hoping that Harry was one of those guys that believe women take ages to get ready, and he would let me be. All I needed was 5 minutes. Maybe 10. 

I didn’t know how long I had slept, but I knew I was hot and that maybe it was time for me to get up. I didn’t want to, though. Maybe if I stayed in bed for 5 more minutes, I could continue sleeping. So I pushed the covers down to my waist, so the cold air could freshen up my skin and I turned the pillow to the cool side of it, letting myself slip away until I fell asleep one more time.

The dipping of the bed woke me up, and I opened my eyes to find that Harry was already staring at me. He was right next to me and had changed to a pair of black joggers and a rattled blue shirt, a far cry from the Gucci model the world knew him to be. He smiled at me, and I was sure I had smiled back, although I wasn’t too sure. 

“What time is it?” I heard myself ask, my voice pasty and hoarse. 

“Almost midnight.”

“Mmmmmm.”

I closed my eyes and nuzzled myself against the pillow, ready to go back to sleep. It was then when I felt it, a sharp feeling on my shoulder, followed by Harry’s playful laugh. 

I sat up and turned to him, only to see him bite back his stupid smile. He looked guiltily at me for a second, before he let his eyes wander down to my body, noticing only now that I was in my underwear. His eyes quickly flew back to mine and I could notice the slight flush on his cheeks. 

“Did you just bite me?” I asked, and even if I wanted to sound mad, I couldn’t help but smile at him. 

“You were the one to tell me I shouldn’t kiss you anymore,” he shrugged off in response.

“If you’re gonna go around biting me, I would rather you kiss me instead.”

“You sure? You keep changing your mind.”

“No biting, Harry,” I refused to answer his question. Maybe cause I didn’t know the answer to it. But all I got from him was a shit-eating grin. 

“We’ll talk about biting later...let’s go back to that kiss.”

“Harry…”

“I have a counterproposal,” he smirked softly. I realize I could smell his perfume, soft and breezy, and I could feel the warmth of his body as he scooted closer to me. Sleep was slowly fading away and I was all too aware of the loud beating of my heart. 

“What?” I would say yes to anything he asked. 

“Let’s have fun. No rules.”

“That sounds dangerous.”

“It’s a lot safer than just...not doing what we really want.”

“And what do you really want, H?”

“Right now? You. I want you, S.”

“What about your girlfriend?”

“Technically you are my girlfriend, babe.”

“And what happens when I fall in love with you, Harry?”

“If one of us is gonna fall in love, it’s gonna be me,” he snorted. “Don’t worry about that.”

“How do we...start this?” I asked, his eyes falling on mine as he offered me a mischievous smile. 

“It already started, baby.”

“Then what do we do?”

“How about a shower?” He asked and I gulped down just at the thought. It was a lot to think about, his wet body, his kisses, the fact that we both would be naked. It was a lot. 

“Let’s do that,” I smiled. 

_________

[dreamdaddydutch]

Hey! If it’s alright can I request some (rough) smut with Charles Smith? Really been hardcore thirsting after him recently haha I absolutely adore your blog btw.. you’re definitely one of the most talented writers on this site :) I follow @vanderlindemangofarm too and I heard you’ve been having a rough time at work recently. I hope things start to look up soon! Do make sure to get enough rest 💕

Hey! So I know this was requested an awfully long time ago so I am sorry for the delay in posting but here we are! I kept this gender neutral. I apologise as it goes a bit abstract/surreal somewhere around two thirds in, I just was feeling writing a certain way and went with it lol. Thank you for your kind words of support as well, I really appreciate that! I have a holiday coming up so that’ll help! 

Pairing: Charles x reader (gender neutral)   I   Warnings: Smut   I   Word Count: 2,580.  

It was yet another cold night in Colter. From what the others had said you doubted you would be here long, but it had already felt like a life time. 

The cold was starting to get under your skin, it was the type that seeped, slow at first so you barely noticed it. Like drops of blood in wood, the cold was obvious at first, then slowly dispersed in a fashion that made you nearly forget about it, only to find days later that it had penetrated your core.

You’d taken over from Javier on watch, your fingers were so numb despite gloves that you were sure even if you needed to use your gun, you might not have been able to. You watched your breath hang in the air and tried to hold onto thoughts of summer to keep you warm.

Most of all you were fed-up of having little to no time with Charles whatsoever. He’d only been in the gang for several months but the two of you had clicked the moment he joined. A few weeks after he’d joined the gang you’d spent your first night together. Although you weren’t exactly official, you had been spending a lot of time together and it didn’t go unnoticed by the rest of the gang.

But since leaving Blackwater he’d barely spoken to you.

You didn’t know whether it was the cold but as you stood here, feet frozen to the spot, you felt tears in your eyes. Just as you thought you’d burst into tears you felt a hand on your shoulder. Your eyes shot wide open, Charles.

Charles smiled warmly, “Not being a very good look out are we?”

You knew he was only kidding around but it was enough for you to start to cry.

“Hey, hey I didn’t mean anything by it,” Charles wrapped his arms around you, careful not to hurt his hand anymore.

“I’m sorry Charles,” you mumbled into his hair.

He pulled away to look at you, “What for?”

“Being a terrible look out and being so emotional, I need to get a grip.”

Charles pressed a kiss to your forehead, “It’s okay, it’s cold out here.”

“I just miss you is all and it’s freezing and I feel so lost.”

“Easy to feel lost out here in the grey.”

“But you,” there was a pause now as you contemplated how to tell him how you felt, “But when I’m lost you make it so I can find my way home again.”

Charles stroked your cheek with his uninjured hand, the side of his thumb rubbing small circles into your skin. You nuzzled into his hand and found it perfectly warm.

“How’s your hand doing?” You asked, feeling suddenly ashamed of your own confessions when he had been in so much pain.

Charles sighed, “It’s been better, but it’s okay. I know I’ve been distant; it isn’t you, it’s just.”

Whatever it was you wanted him to tell you so that you could work through it, “I get like this sometimes, but how about we spend tonight together?”

You looked up, hope now for the first time in weeks, did he really mean it?

“Charles that would be…wonderful.”

“Now you just make sure you keep watch good okay?”

You nodded, no matter how cold it was or how long you were going to be stood out there for, knowing that you had an evening with Charles ahead of you was enough to make you feel warm inside and get you through. 

And so you watched the world pass by, the snow falling slowly ahead of you and thought of Charles’ large rough hands.

It was much later on at night when Charles and you were finally able to be alone. It was later than either of you had liked, but considering needing discretion and not to be interrupted, you didn’t mind waiting. 

The two of you entered the room that had been designated to yourselves in silence. It was so often that way, you were close but a part of that closeness was physical and with few words spoken between the two of you. Everything you needed to say to one another could be said with expressions or the lightest of touches when others weren’t watching. But tonight was not one of those moments.

You were exhausted, your muscles ached and bones felt weary from all the cold, you could tell by looking at the way Charles and how slowly he moved when removing his boots.

“Charles,” you said softly, placing a hand on the small of his back. He looked over his shoulder and offered a warm smile, “Hey,” he said. 

“Alone at last.”

He nodded and turned round, wrapping his arms around you, despite how cold the night was, when his lips touched yours they were warm and soft. You kissed gently for several minutes, warming one another slowly and savouring the taste of one another, but you knew it wouldn’t last long. When you’d gone some time without sleeping together it was often rough and full of want with little regard for romance. Sometimes that was the kind of sex you needed. 

You were right, the kisses soon became rough and Charles sucked your lower lip with such force you were sure it would bruise. These were the kisses that left you weak, knees trembling, shaking hands trying to hold onto any of Charles’ flesh that you could grip. Hands working at ripping the clothes from one another’s bodies with eyes shut. A blur, that was what this type of sex was. An orgastic, drunken, dream-like blur. Rules were broken, no words spoken, all the talking that was needed was done with the fine placing of finger tips, eyebrows raised, lips curling, nose twitching, eyelids closing, slowly….oh so slowly. Eyes opening, bright and heightened in arousal. The scent of sex permeating the room. 

Without realising it you were naked, your skin pricked in the cold night air, but not to worry, Charles’ hands large and warm worked tirelessly across your naked flesh to warm you up. Pushed you back onto the bed and wrapped your mid section in blankets, leaving your sex exposed for him to play and drink at his leisure.

When he was on top of you, the weight made you feel safe and like the world had melted away. You could see nothing but him, his handsome features illuminated by the candle light that flickered in the corner of the room. 

You worshipped him like a god and he you. Several weeks before you had fucked whilst both splattered in blood, arms and legs sticky with another’s death and semen spread on your stomach, between your thighs as you rolled in mud. Returning then to your natural state, ever hungry for more.

Sometimes after the act you felt ashamed, when your senses were awakened anew in post-orgasmic bliss. There was a sudden horror at your actions, the fact that neither of you saw anything wrong in what you were doing. The fact that to fuck in such a primal state seemed so natural and oh so welcoming, it was what you were born to do after all. But time had changed that, man kind you felt became more repressed as the years dragged on. Whether through clothes, laws, religion, constraints were designed to make people feel ashamed of their most natural urges. Ashamed to want to live and be free. But with Charles that shame didn’t exist, the two of you understood one another perfectly without words. 

Charles pressed kisses to your cheek, your neck, teeth grazing over your collarbone as he kissed further down your body. His hands roamed your chest, pinching your hard nipples and preparing them for when his lips engulfed them, tongue flicking and sucking in such a precise manner you felt your body lift from the sheets needing more than him. 

Though the blanket was across you, he peeled it back to kiss further down, trailing kisses round your belly button and to your pubic region. Before devouring you he lay the blanket back across you though at this point you didn’t feel as if you’d need it for long.

There was a look Charles gave you before going down on you, such childish wonder almost, excitement and then that broke and gave way to the hunger. His eyes darkened, lowered, he bit his lower lip and then dove down. The way he used his tongue on you, the way his lips savoured all your juices. He started tortuously slow but soon built up a steady pace. 

Your hands were buried in his hair, guiding him a little, you enjoyed the fact that in these situations he allowed you to gain some control of the situation. Taking a breather for a moment he gently blew cold air onto you, making you shiver as he reached for some oil. He carefully lubed up several of his thick fingers before going back down and sucking as he sheathed his fingers inside of you without warning. Your back arched as you cried out, feeling those fingers deep inside of you and curling to hit your g-spot.

Charles often did this, he would make sure you were fully prepared before you fucked, knowing that his size was difficult to accommodate at first and hating hurting you. He would take his time to make sure you were drenched in arousal before entering you. 

“Charles i’m gonna…” you panted.

As he heard those words, felt your fingers grip tighter at his hair, Charles stopped, “I need you to come when I’m inside of you.” He stated it so matter of factly, almost cold, controlling, that was what you loved. You pouted of course but trusted Charles to make you feel incredible.

He got up from the cot and lifted you to your feet, he brushed some of the damp hair away from your face and kissed you, “I want you in my arms.”

You gulped, knowing exactly what that meant, you’d never been with anyone before who could do what he did. To have the strength to lift you in the air and fuck you whilst holding you tightly. It took your breath away every time. 

“But your hand,” you said remembering.

Charles shook his head, “I’ll be fine.”

You didn’t argue any further, just looked up at him with eyes that told him, ‘I trust you.’ He poured oil onto his hard member and pumped with his hands several times, ensuring he was fully covered and slick before he slid into you. 

Charles turned you away from him and then picked you up with such ease it was as if you weighed nothing to him. Your legs and arms folded inwards so you were practically balled up into him. His arms had a firm grip on you and you squeaked as he pulled you into his chest. 

Though holding onto you, he was able to position you so that his cock pressed against your entrance. 

This was the thing you had learnt about Charles, the man had incredible self-control and the ability to go a long time without sex. But when you told him you needed it now, when it was desperate and needed to be rough, he wouldn’t hold back. Charles would give you everything you desired in that moment and was perfectly capable of ruining you.

You held onto the wall, your fingernails gripping so tightly you were sure they would rip as you held on for dear life as Charles thrust into you for the first time. 

You cried out so loudly that you knew the others in the adjoining rooms would easily be able to hear what you were up to, but you didn’t mind. 

Charles bounced you on his cock, his arms lifted you up and then slammed you back down impaling you on his hard, throbbing member. You screamed out loud and tears stung your eyes as Charles continued to slowly lift you and then drop you back down, his arms capable of such a task. 

Your vision grew blurry as you heard him grunting in your ear, weeks of pent up sexual energy now flowing freely from him.

He continued to fuck you like this, with you practically suspended in the air for several minutes before he had to abandon it, you could tell his hand was hurting and doing you like this wasn’t helping. You needn’t of worried, Charles knew exactly what to do. 

He threw you onto the bed, you didn’t need to exchange words to know exactly how he wanted you. You felt the bed drop with his weight as he knelt at the base of the cot and crawled up towards you. 

You went on all fours and felt him spread your ass cheeks before lining himself up and thrusting into you. 

Sex with Charles was always one of two ways, either slow and romantic or rough, the kinda rough where you barely made eye contact and forgot one another’s names. Of course at the end there were always plenty of cuddles and kisses to warm you, but the sex was a need you both had and sometimes when it was rough it helped you process other things that were happening to the gang. 

Charles grabbed a fistful of your hair and tugged roughly backwards jerking your head towards him, your back arching as he did so. His hips slammed into you and the sound of slapping balls against your skin made you moan, your own hand going between your legs to try and relieve some of the tension. 

Charles continued to pound into you, you cursed and hissed underneath him. The fact that he was able to hold you up whilst maintaining a constant and steady rhythm only served to make you more aroused.

“You like this ah?” Charles asked.

“Hmmm yes Charles you know I…” you were unable to finish as Charles thrust into you so hard that you screamed out and grabbed the bedsheets. 

You heard Charles chuckle and then he continued at the same pace. He was panting in your ear, but it wasn’t out of control like it often was with others you’d been with. No, Charles was measured, his pants were deep and breathy, the hot air a harsh sting in your ears that told you how much he needed you. 

You could tell Charles was close when his movements became a little more unmeasured, slightly erratic. The kind of movements which from the outside wouldn’t have seemed any different to before, but you knew him well, knew the small changes and the way his dick begun to twitch when he was close. 

The hand that had been gripping your hair now fell to the bed so he could reach for your own sex, ensuring that as he reached orgasm, you too would soon follow. He carried you through the climax, much like he had carried you through every aspect of your life for the past several months. 

Charles moaned your name softly as he came deep inside of you, your own orgasm following moments later. Your legs trembled violently and after a few orgasmic spasms you collapsed onto the bed, Charles on top of you, his chest pressed to your back as he remained inside of you, worshipping you and relishing in your warmth and the release you had both experienced. 

[blarfkey]

Armistice -- Reylo ficlet

So I’m spending part of my quarantine digging up old fics and polishing them. I wrote this down right after TROS as a way to let some of the Reylo out of my system. I never intended on publishing, but I’ve grown more proud of it. Tell me if I should throw up on AO3.

BTW -- this is only been lightly beta’d lol. 

~~~~~~~~~~~

Ever since Crait, that last look Rey sees on Kylo’s—on Ben’s face—haunts her. As she stared him down from the ramp of the Millennium Falcon, she expected to see anger reflected back at her. Or hatred, jealousy, murderous intent. Especially after hearing how vicious and unhinged his fight was with Luke, how he ordered everyone in the base killed on sight.

Instead she just sees . . .

Grief.

But what haunts her the most is how easily it settles around him, like a second cloak. It’s not a fresh and angry wound, it’s a scar that aches in the middle of the night, that signals the weather, that looks back at you in every mirror.

It’s an old friend.

She knows grief like that.

In the desert, there was always wind whistling through the gaps in her makeshift home. On the Falcon, the ship sang to her in various groans and beeps and whistles. Now, settled on Ajan Kloss, they have to sleep with ear plugs to block out the deafening noise of the jungle.

But nothing is louder than the silence that triggers the Force Bond. It’s her only warning, that sudden dampening, as if someone opened the airlock on a ship. The lack of noise is worse than the noise.

Rey braces herself. So fast—so unpredictably—does he flicker between Kylo and Ben—she never knows what to prepare for. At least on Ahch-to, she had her own anger, her own grief, to guide her. But now boundary lines between friend and enemy have muddled, colors running together to create something she has no idea how to quantify.

He could scream at her or beg for her and she doesn’t know which one is worse. Or how she would react to either.

Instead, only the silence greets her.

Rey turns around and finds him on her bed, laid out on his back, one arm bent against his chest, the other nestled against his side.

He looks dead.

Fear—sharp and surprising—rises in her throat and she takes careful, silent steps towards him. Close enough to see his chest fall ever so slightly. Her own chest rises and falls with her relief, and then she chastises herself for being ridiculous. Of course he’s not dead. She would know— instantly—

He snorts softly in his sleep. Rey freezes, both dreading and hoping for the moment he wakes up. His head drops to its side and does not stir again.

She hears nothing but the sound of his breathing, deep and even. The first time he took off his mask struck her speechless. The monster she had feared looked so young. So impossibly human.

And that’s the way he looks now, in the dim light of her room. He sleeps with the depth of the exhausted and it has eased the furrow in his brow, the drag of his lips, hidden the ferocity of his eyes. He looks like a vision of another person, another Ben, someone who didn’t turn, someone whose hand she could take.

It’s that thought that carries her to the edge of the bed. She hesitates a moment before slowly lowering herself to perch on the edge.

Still he does not wake.

Her hand reaches out and nudges a lock of his hair from his forehead. He has a mole, buried in the hairline by his temple. The urge to kiss it rises up in her, fueled by the knowledge that she could probably get away with it in his current state. Rey swallows, brings her hand down to his chest, and clasps his hand—the one she could not take -- in her own. Her palm rests whisper-light against the back of his hand, her fingers barely skimming the sides of his own.

She sits like this for a long moment, watching him breathe, tracing the lines of his profile. Trying to remind herself of who he could be, if she could just reach him. Any moment now, the connection will break and this moment will become just a memory, but right now, it’s real and it’s hers. It’s one moment of peace between them after so much fighting, so much pain and bitterness and betrayal.

The press of his thumb jolts her from her thoughts. She stares as it brushes, almost reverently, across her knuckles. Her heart leaps in her throat, forcing her to take long, deep breaths. She drags her gaze to his face precisely because of how afraid she is to do it.

His eyes are heavy-lidded from sleep and look at her with such yearning, it hits her like a sucker punch. She hardly dares to breathe as he lifts her hand slowly, gently, to his lips.

His mouth is hot like a brand.

And then he’s gone.

When he saw Rey at his bedside, he thought he had dreamed her. He had been awake for days, the sting of their loss on Crait sending the rest of the First Order scrambling. There was no way she could be real. After all they put each other through, he expects nothing more than her rage.

Such raw power, such feral anger—she reminds him so much of himself. She walks the knife’s edge; if he thought he could just reach her, he could tip her over into the abyss with himself.

But that was Snoke’s desire. He doesn’t want her to turn, to lose that brightness within her, he just wanted—wants—her near. He wants to not be alone. He wants someone who understands him, who looks at him full of hope, and kindness—like she did in the elevator.

And for a moment, his weak, stupid self thought he could have it.

So when he felt her fingers ever so carefully latch onto his, he knew it was a trick of the mind—a fresh way to torture himself. He kissed her hand the way he would have done if she had taken it—and then he woke up.

Now he stares down at her prone form, her knees tucked into her chest, breathing deep and even, and realizes it was not a dream at all.

Rey of Jakku sleeps the rest of the exhausted. She does not stir at his sudden presence. His lightsaber hangs from his belt. He could kill her before she could take her next breath.

Even lost in the depths of his anger, he never had the will to act on such a thought. And he doesn’t think he ever shall, even if her own blade sits at his throat.

In sleep, her hair drapes in disarray. It spills over her shoulder, dangerously close to catching in the small, open-mouthed snores that tumble from her lips.

He remembers—suddenly—vividly—her fingers brushing back a lock of his hair from his brow. In his dream state, it had felt like his mother.

In that moment, she could have done herself the favor of killing him.

(If she had turned like he thought he wanted, she would have.)

Slowly, on the verge of chastising himself, he kneels at the side of her bed and reaches out.

Instantly, he recoils at the stark contrast of his dark leather gloves against the paleness of her cheek. It reminds him too much of the interrogation chamber, of how deeply he tried to frighten her— precisely because she unsettled him so much.

Of how terribly that backfired on him.

Finger by finger, he tugs off his glove before reaching for her again. The wavy strands of her hair feel glossy against his finger tips. He keeps his touch feather-light as he tucks her hair behind her ear, hardly daring to believe his own audacity. A lock of her hair slips back like water down her cheek. His thumb brushes against the shell of her ear as he brushes it back.

She mumbles something too garbled and faint to understand, her hand drifting to wrap softly around his. He freezes when her eyes start to flutter open, struggling to drag herself from sleep. He needs to step away—he needs distance—what is she going to think when she wakes to him touching her—

Frozen in place, he watches helplessly as the fog of sleep clears from her gaze. He sees the exact moment clarity appears, when reality crystallizes behind those eyes.

His breath lies trapped in his lungs, bracing for her reaction.

She tenses beneath him, muscles coiled and ready—a wariness that tries hard not to tumble into fear flashing in her eyes.

It shames him. When he saw her at his bedside, even as a dream, her presence never struck him as anything but welcome.

He hovers over hers like a nightmare.

He pulls his hand back, but she only grips it tighter, her eyes searching his with an intensity that makes him feel horrifically exposed.

“Hello, Ben,” she murmurs, voice soft with sleep.

He swallows against the lump in his throat. The name doesn’t hurt like it used to.

“I thought it was a dream,” he whispers to her. “But it was you, wasn’t it?”

Maybe that’s why he’s here, hand clutched in hers, to confirm for himself the moment that has haunted him.

“Yes.” Her gaze dips away from his with faint embarrassment. “I’m . . . sorry.”

Sorry . . . to offer him mercy, kindness, comfort . . . when he deserves nothing but her all-consuming rage.

He shakes his head. “Look at what I’m doing.”

His hand is still buried in her hairline, thumb still resting against her ear.

It’s not so much a smile as the possibility of one that softens her mouth. Memories from the elevator flash across his mind. It’s as hard to look away from her lips then as it is now.

If she hadn’t disappeared, he doesn’t know what he would have done.

The first thing Leia taught her in her training was how to sense and block others with the Force. Knowing how Rey’s interrogation went with Kylo Ren, keeping him from discovering the base becomes a matter of the greatest priority. Especially since there are so few of them left.

Rey expected the bond to die along with Snoke, not to become stronger. When they touched hands on Ach-to, it felt nothing as solid as the lips on her fingers, that first night in her room. And the touch of his hand in her hair, beneath her fingers—it took a long moment of panic before she could convince herself that he hadn’t physically broken into the base.

When they come together, it feels too real. What would happen if they started seeing each other’s surroundings? What if he hears Leia in the background?

The risk is too great. So Rey spends weeks building up her walls until she can’t feel him anymore. Each time it feels like a betrayal, an abandonment.

Each time does not get easier.

That agility course will be the death of her. She knows it. It’s impossible. If Luke finished it, then he’s a goddamn liar.

Oh, but she came so close today.

She collapses on her pallet in the Falcon, utterly drained. In fact, as the pull of sleep grows heavier, she nearly misses the sudden density of silence, a pleasant weight beside her, another warm breath near her ear.

Rey’s hand flops to the side and it hits something—someone—solid.

She turns sluggishly to face him. He lies next to her, on his side, dark circles haunting his eyes.

It has been months and months since she has seen him or felt him. What does it say about her that she missed these stolen moments of peace?

His eyes track hers with a dark intensity that was not present in their previous interactions. A thread of unease runs through her. Rey swallows and burrows her head into her pillow.

“I’m too tired for a fight,” she murmurs to him.

“I don’t want one.”

But his eyes say differently. They bear down on her, as fathomless as space, only made sharper by the dark circles that lie underneath.

Tentatively, Rey reaches out and brushes her hand against his cheek. She has much more experience in provocation than comfort, especially with him, but she doesn’t like the hard edge of that look in his eyes. Something has changed between then and now, despite them not having a formal confrontation since Crait.

Are you alright? she wants to ask. What happened? What did I do?

Ridiculous questions, each one. As if he would answer. As if she doesn’t already know the answer.

Her thumb swipes delicately across his cheekbone as her fingers trace the stark line of his jaw. His eyes flutter closed. He feels so warm, solid, and alive underneath her touch. It is almost impossible to believe that he isn’t in this very room with her.

The dip of his scar brushes against her thumb and she flinches, jerking her hand away. His eyes snap open, his gaze sharpening with—not condemnation, exactly . . .

Acknowledgment.

“You should admire your handiwork,” he murmurs, pressing her hand with his against the scar.

Rey swallows. Presses her palm down the ridge of his scar as if she could erase it with her touch. In that moment, she had been feral with rage. If the earth had not shattered in half, she might have very well killed him. In fact, as she boarded the Falcon while his reinforcements were out of sight, she believed she had.

The first time she saw it, his scar—blackened with stitches—she felt a surge of pride. The great and fearsome Kylo Ren, taken down by a scavenger with a borrowed lightsaber she had never used before

Now the sight of it makes her sick.

“I’m sorry,” she whispers.

“Don’t,” he bites back.

Don’t start, his eyes say to her. Don’t say things you can’t take back.

So far, there has been an unspoken rule—do not mention the past. They are skirting dangerously close to breaking it.

“Okay,” she says, tracing the edge of his hairline, whispering over the mole she discovered. “Okay.”

For a long moment, they do nothing but gaze at each other. Rey catalogs the freckles and beauty marks dotting along on his cheeks and forehead, the slope of his nose; the faint shadow of stubble above his lips. An unwelcome truth struck her,  as it did that moment on their way to see Snoke: how could someone mired in so much darkness be so beautiful?

Because he had so much light just waiting to be uncovered—or so she thought. As if Rey, a nobody, could have ever been enough to reach him in such inky darkness.

What thoughts must he have for her, she has no idea, as his gaze skates from her brow, to her nose, to her lips. Whatever they may be, his gaze sharpens with sudden resolve. His hand bridges the distance to cups her cheek, her jaw, the broad span of his palm a warm, comfortable weight.

She leans into hit.

“I’m coming for you, Rey,” he says. “I won’t stop until I find you.”

She swallows.

Something surges in her core, crackling underneath her skin.

It’s not fear.

Anticipation.

“And what exactly is going to happen to me when you do?” she finds herself whispering back.

“You’ll find out when I get to you.”

She swallows, her eyes dipping down to his mouth. “That’s if you catch me first.”

He mirrors her gaze, eyes locking on her lips, much like they did in the elevator.

“I guess we shall see,” he says.

He leans into her, thumb dragging across the corner of her mouth—

For a wild moment, she thinks he is going to kiss her.

For a wild moment, she is going to let him.

And then he’s gone.

[eilonwiiy]

On Your Terms ; an Air Awakens one-shot

Summary: "She’s not looking for an answer.  Someday he would figure out his feelings for his brother.  But not tonight.  Tonight is about another prince.  One that is not tormented by shadows, but caught in a sunbeam, and she has no intention of letting him go."

A glimpse into Baldair and Raylynn's night after he relinquishes his tent to Aldrik and Vhalla in Fire Falling.

Author’s note: This is such a niche ship in an already tiny fandom, but The Prince’s Rogue (Book 2 in the Golden Guard Trilogy) gave Baldair and Raylynn’s fates in Air Awakens a whole new meaning and I hAVE ALOT OF FEELINGS.  Everyone should go read the GG trilogy btw.  Lots of fun.  Lots of pain.

Ships: Baldair Solaris/Raylynn Westwind

Tags: shameless smut, porn with feelings, mild angst/comfort, fluff and humor

Read on AO3: here

*   .   *   .   *   .   *   .

The soft rustle of the canvas could easily be a brush of the night air, but the involuntary uptick in Raylynn’s heartbeat tells her otherwise.  Her fingers tighten around the hilt of her mother’s sword resting by her side, the only sign of life she’ll allow under the veil of darkness.  Any other man wouldn’t live long enough to see themselves cut in two by her blade.

But she hears him even in his silence.

She frowns inwardly.  Somehow war has made her soft.

Keeping her breathing steady, she remains still.  Her bedroll is thin and worn, a companion for many a soldier before her, and hardly accommodating for one person, never mind two.  Certainly not for someone as large as him, and especially not as royal.

Still, she feels his weight as he lowers himself to the ground, crawling towards her with all the careful slowness of someone not wishing to wake their partner.  The thought makes her heart still, and when he peels back the blanket and lays down beside her, she secretly welcomes the familiar warmth, while noting the absence of chainmail.

Good, she thinks.  An admission of defeat.    

Only when his arm snakes around her waist and gently draws her closer so that her back is pressed flush against the hard expanse of his chest does she speak.

“My prince,” she breathes, and she revels in the way the sleep in her voice transforms the title into something seductive, blissfully aware of what it stirs in him.  “To what do I owe this pleasure?”

Baldair nuzzles his way through the tangle of hair swept behind her shoulders, holding her closer, and a soft chuckle rumbles through his chest, sending all too pleasing vibrations against Raylynn’s back.  She allows herself a smile, knowing he cannot see.

“I find myself without a bed this evening,” he murmurs.  There’s no disappointment in his voice.

“That’s odd,” Raylynn demurs, her voice light, “considering you burden your men with the task of lugging that monstrosity wherever we go.”

There’s another laugh.  “And yet,” Baldair counters huskily in her ear, hot breath ghosting over her skin, “I do recall you expressing appreciation for it on more than one occasion.  Rather vocally, if memory serves. Multiple times. In one night.”

Raylynn rolls her eyes, but for all his arrogance, the prince’s words hit their desired mark.  Warmth seeps from the wound, spreading fast through her and settling all too comfortably in the place below her navel.  She licks her lips; her little princeling is moving this along much too fast for her taste.  She needs to staunch the break before it consumes her.

“Are you sure about that?” she replies in an entirely unaffected tone.  “Perhaps you have me mistaken for someone else.  No one would be surprised, least of all me.”

“I could never,” Baldair hums, arms tightening around her and breathing in deeply.

Raylynn pauses.  The complete lack of argument is… well, if she’s being honest, unusual.  He’s never not been sincere with her.  It’s the reason why this – whatever this is – works.  But the way his response rolls off his tongue is unsettling.  Though not nearly as much as the lazy circles he begins drawing on her skin with the tip of his nose.

She tries not to react, body fighting with itself, unsure of whether it wants to retreat or surrender to his subtle advances.  With every slow swipe, she can feel his lips just barely graze the tender area, warm, tantalizingly soft.  She trains her gaze ahead, eyes tracing the faint outline of her hand clinging to her sword.  It feels like nothing under her grasp.  Useless.

“Ray,” Baldair whispers into her silence.  She presses her lips together, suppressing any sound that may betray her, and it’s like he knows.  Because suddenly, his mouth is on her neck as though to coax free every bit of longing trapped deep in her throat.

It works, too.  A low, drawn out moan fills the tent, and in the stillness of the night, it stokes the fire of their shared desire, awakening something that the Mother above designed in the stars to never be laid to rest for too long.

Raylynn’s head tips backwards on its own accord, offering the slope of her neck fully to Baldair, and it’s all the permission he needs to latch onto her pulse.  He takes his time, his mouth moving gently over the sensitive spot with wet, languid kisses causing her eyes to flutter close.  She’s already breathless, lips slightly parted, already drowning in the sensation, and she barely registers the hand traveling up her side.  She half expects him to pull her around to meet him fully when his ascent stops and lingers on her shoulder - instead, his touch slowly trails down her arm, grazes the curve of her elbow, and follows the path all the way to the fist wrapped around her sword.  His hand rests over hers and his thumb brushes over her knuckles lightly, tenderly.

Raylynn doesn’t even realize he’s stopped kissing her.  She can only feel his hand curved over hers, caressing something deeper within.

The silence beats between them.

Then, a whisper.

“On your terms.”

Everything stops.  Except for the thumb on her hand.  Except for the heartbeat pressed into her back, reaching out to her, calm and steady.  Never threatening to break her.  

And just like that, Raylynn lets go of the sword.

There is no hesitation in her touch when her fingers find Baldair’s.  They entwine with purpose, savoring how perfectly made they were to fit.  She guides him to the valley between her breasts, holds him there, and together, with her fingers tangled with his, they find her heartbeat.

Neither one of them moves.  Raylynn could stay like this all night, wrapped up in his arms, breathing as one.  She knows he would not object, would not push her further. It’s all she needs.

But she wants more.

Raylynn shifts in Baldair’s embrace, and when she pulls her hand away, he stays where she left him, cradling her heart as though it might stop if he were to let go.  She reaches behind her head, fingers grazing the stubble of his jaw, then further, raking through his hair.  The angle is awkward, but when she turns her head, nose bumping into his, Baldair knows what she wants and draws himself up to meet her lips with his.

For a moment, Raylynn’s lungs forget their purpose.  Warmth seeps into her bones, her body instantly surrendering to Baldair, melting into his.  His lips are soft, softer than they have any right to be after weeks of marching through the desert, and she feels herself pouring everything she has into this one moment, at the same time claiming him, devouring all that he’s giving her in return.

When they break apart, they’re both breathless.  Raylynn’s eyes flutter open to find his already on her.  His gaze is tender, yet intense, searching her face before bringing his hand to her cheek and brushing his lips with hers.

“I’ve missed you,” he breathes into her mouth before recapturing her lips with something much firmer.  Raylynn sighs into him, twisting her neck, desperate to deepen the kiss.  

It’s a ridiculous thing to say.  Truly.  But it spurs her heart to beat faster nonetheless.  From the moment she’d chosen to honor her oath to the crown, the golden cuff around her wrist never came off, as much a reminder to herself that she was bound to his fate as it was a symbol of her place in his guard.  She never left his side; he’d made sure of that when, on the morning of their first ride, he’d taken the reigns of her horse and, in front of all his men, in front of his brother, his father, led her to the front line to ride beside him.  A promise of his own - one made not from the crown, but from a kiss in another desert, in another time.  

By the Mother, she’s missed him too.  Somehow, somewhere in the space between them she had been aching for this closeness.  

“I’m here,” she murmurs into his lips, arching into his touch, bidding the hand still cradling her heartbeat to move.  Calloused fingers find the opening in her cotton tunic and slip inside, grazing her breast.  A broken gasp escapes her when he squeezes and rolls his thumb over its peak, circling the spot over and over, applying the perfect amount of pressure.

It’s not long before his hand is moving again - away - but the disappointment of losing his warmth on her chest dissolves into nothing when his journey begins to take him lower and lower, slipping beneath the blanket, skimming over the hem of her tunic and -

Baldair stops, hand frozen on her hip.  

Her bare hip.

Raylynn smirks.

It takes Baldair a moment to regain his senses.  He exhales shakily. “Were you waiting for me, love?” he teases in her ear, a ragged, almost desperate, edge to his breathing.

Raylynn hums happily, pressing her backside into Baldair, eliciting a surprised breath from him and feeling his hardness, hot and ready for her, through his breeches.  “I wait for no man.”

The silence that follows is so wickedly sweet, Raylynn almost laughs.  She delights in his torture as much as his pleasure, and as the meaning of her words fully sink in, the grip on her hip sharpens.  

“Mother, Raylynn,” Baldair groans, almost painfully, as his forehead drops onto her shoulder.  It’s exactly the reaction Raylynn was looking for, but there’s no satisfaction in it.  Not when his hand is so close, yet entirely too far away from the heat pounding between her legs.  She opens her mouth to say something, but he suddenly jerks his hips, rolling his arousal roughly against her backside, making her feel every inch of him.  

“Did you think of me?” he rasps in her ear.  “As you were bidding you time? ”    

Raylynn meets his thrust with a sensual roll of her hips.  “My pleasure is my own.”

He chuckles.  A deep, lustful thing.  “Indeed. Might you be persuaded to share?”

“Depends.”

“On?”

“What you’ll give me in return.”

Baldair’s hand digs into her skin.  “Everything. If you’ll let me.”

She does.

It could have been a couple minutes or several lifetimes before he’s sliding into her, filling her in a way that no other person ever has or ever could.  Strong legs wrap around his waist, guiding him, anchoring him home as her hips rock in perfect harmony with his.  It’s not at all rough, but there’s power underneath his gentle movements, each thrust a punctured call she feels go through her entire body, yours yours yours.  

With the prince, it’s always an endless tide of pleasure, and tonight is no different.  His mouth is everywhere.  Her breasts, her neck, her jaw, her lips - until her entire body is humming in sensation.  And still he has more to give.  Still he breathes quiet praise between fervent kisses.  Soft words of how he missed her, missed this.  That sends her heart fluttering more than anything.

All too soon, it becomes too much for either one of them.  It’s as though time had ceased from when they rode out from Solarin to the moment before Baldair entered her tent and now that they were finally together, it was rushing to catch up.  If Raylynn had any breath to spare, she’d laugh.  They’re just too good together. And it’s been so long.

Damn this war.

Baldair slips an arm underneath her neck, gripping her shoulder and cradling the back of her head in the crux of his elbow, while his other hand props himself up slightly so he can see her face.  His mouth hangs open, eyes tracing the outline of her face in reverence as he pulls her close, all the while he never ceases moving inside her, relentless in his pursuit to bring her over the edge.  

“Ray,” he rasps between labored breathing, lips close to hers. “Raylynn.  I - ”  

She silences him kissing him full on the mouth.  It’s urgent, breathless.  His teeth scrape her lower lip, nipping and tugging until she moans and opens to him.  Tender, the tip of his tongue penetrates, brushes against hers, matching her own wanton sounds with groans of his own.  When their increasingly frantic rhythm forces them to break apart, she fills the space with a litany of his own name.  There’s no air left between them for more than that.  

The sound of his name on her lips spurs Baldair on, and suddenly he shifts his angle, making every stroke a headrush of pleasure for her.  Faintly she remembers that they’re in a tent in the middle of nowhere, but this - this feeling - it can’t be real.  Something this exquisite can’t exist in the Western Waste.

Baldair sets a devastating rhythm, and Raylynn clings to her prince with all her strength, almost desperate as she feels herself being pressed deeper and deeper into the sand with each frenzied snap of his hips.  She can hardly keep up.  Moisture prickles at the edges of her eyes and it takes everything she has to all but sob out loud.  He’s so good.  So so good.  It’s excruciating.  Every blast of breath against her ear sends the mounting heat between them soaring higher and higher and higher until -

Raylynn arches her back and scrabbles at his back, feels her nails dig into his scorching skin as her release crashes over her.  It’s like the wind has been knocked out of her.  She’s gasping frantically for air while at the same time trying to keep from crying out.  

She’s not alone.  

Somewhere beyond her own euphoria, she hears the harsh breathes of her name being buried into her neck over and over again in a susurrus of uncontrol as Baldair’s hips stutter involuntarily against her own.  She feels the quick surging of heat inside her and she clenches and quivers around him, wringing every last swell of need from his spent body.

Despite being out of breath, Baldair pulls her into a passionate kiss - and doesn’t stop.  Nor do their hips, slowly rolling in tandem, lazy and luxurious, neither one of them in any rush to end this moment.  Raylynn has never felt more unwound, more unbound.  His heartbeat, once a tempest, begins to slow against her and she latches onto it, using it to anchor her own runaway pulse.  

It’s only when the desert air settles over them and their bodies begin to cool that Baldair pulls away.  He smiles down at her, expression overflowing with adoration, and he smooths away the damp hair clinging to her sweat-slick forehead.  He bends forward, and she thinks he’s going to kiss her there, but instead, he gently coaxes her cheek to him and presses his lips to the scar running up the side of her face.  A tremor runs through her, entirely different than anything he made her body feel moments ago.  No, it’s better.  She didn’t think it was possible.

The feeling doesn’t leave even when his mouth does.  With her prince sprawled out on his back and Raylynn nestled in his side, they are once again surrounded by the quiet of the night.  Baldair’s hand tangles lazily through her hair as they listen.  It’s not long before Raylynn grows restless.  

“So,” she says, propping her chin on Baldair’s chest and looking up at him, “you’re staying?”

Baldair peers down at her, brow arched slightly.  “Would you like to me to leave?”

“No,” she amends, and she’s a little disappointed with herself for how quickly she says it.  Baldair grins.  “No, it’s not like that. I just figured, tomorrow’s a big day and you have your bed so -”

“I told you,” the prince interrupts, “my bed is preoccupied tonight.”

“That was true?”

Baldair frowns.  “When have I ever lied to you?”  His tone is playfully exasperated, but Raylynn notes the wound underneath the question.  She can’t have that.

Raylynn raises herself up to his face, thoroughly enjoying the way his eyes widen as her naked breasts brush against his chest.  She hovers over him for just a moment, then lowers her lips to his. The hand in her hair stills, then presses her more insistently to him.  It’s supposed to be quick.  An assurance.  But it turns into a promise, and it’s minutes before either one breaks away.

By the time Raylynn releases him, Baldair’s chest is already heaving against her once more.  She rests her forehead against his, giving each other a moment to collect themselves, then gives him a quick peck on the lips before sinking comfortably into her place at his side.

“Did a pack of noru run off with it?” she asks softly, as though she hadn’t just interrupted their conversation with a mindblowing kiss.

Baldair clears his throat, a chuckle escaping.  “No, I let someone else take it.”

That certainly peaks Raylynn’s curiosity.  “My, how generous of you. Who’s the lucky maiden?  Or bachelor? By the Mother, if it’s Jax I’ll - ”

“It’s my brother.”

Stunned silence fills their tent.  Somewhere outside someone coughs.  It takes Raylynn several seconds to process what he’s just said, and when she does, she props herself up to look at him.  He only stares at the canvas ceiling, a line burrowed between his brow.

“You let your brother stay in your tent?” she balks.  When Baldair doesn’t answer, she prompts, “Why?”

“Not just Aldrik,” Baldair finally asserts, still not looking at her.  “It was for Vhalla too.”

The frown on his face deepens at the girl’s name.  Raylynn suppresses a sigh, looking away.  Leave it to Aldrik and his precious Windwalker to snuff out their afterglow.

It’s not that she’s jealous.  No - if she were the jealous type then whatever relationship she shared with Baldair would never work.  However, his fixation on the eldest prince’s “plaything” - his constant concern and drive to protect her from his brother - worries her.  For all her love for him - yes, love, she can admit that to herself - she thinks when it comes to his brother, sometimes the golden prince only sees what he wants to see.

“I think he loves her.”

Or not.

Raylynn’s head snaps back to gawk at Baldair.  He’s already looking at her, expression pained, so different from the face she was kissing moments ago.  She’s tempted to lean down and chase away the tension with another.  One that will carry them through the night and burn through all the stars.

“Would that be so bad if it were true?” she asks instead.  “Does Aldrik not deserve love?”

“It’s not Aldrik that I worry about.”

“Isn’t he, though?”

Baldair’s entire demeanor turns to stone.  Raylynn half expects him to walk right out of her tent.  Naked if he has to.  Anything to get away from this conversation that has driven them so far from where this night began.  But he doesn’t. Instead, he stares at her long and hard, until the serious lines on his face slowly melt away and there’s nothing left but sorrow.  He suddenly looks so young, and that’s because he is.  

Raylynn regards him for a moment longer.  She’s not looking for an answer. Someday he would figure out his feelings for his brother.  But not tonight.  Tonight is about another prince.  One that is not tormented by shadows, but caught in a sunbeam, and she has no intention of letting him go.

Baldair stiffens when Raylynn lowers herself back down onto the bedroll beside him and comes to rest her head on his chest, seemingly surprised by the action, given the exchange.  But when she pulls the blanket over them and snuggles closer, he relaxes, wrapping his arms around her in turn and brushing his lips across the top of her head.

“So,” Raylynn drawls, “your brother gets it on with the Windwalker and your first thought is to pay me a visit?”

“What?” Baldair chokes out.

“Admit it, you were -” Raylynn searches for the right word, “- inspired.”

“I was most certainly not,” huffs Baldair, shifting irritably on the bedroll.  “I gave them my tent because my presence was clearly unnecessary for their prolific declarations to each other to continue and as there was no end in sight, I generously removed myself.”

Raylynn smirks into his chest. “‘Prolific declarations’ you say?”

“Ray, stop,” demands Baldair, and Raylynn actually laughs.  As if the prince could possibly order her to do anything.  Agitation rumbles through his chest. “They aren’t actually - Aldrik wouldn’t -”

There’s a pregnant pause.  Raylynn almost feels sorry for him.  Almost.

“I’m having Jax burn the damn thing in the morning,” Baldair announces deadpanned.

Raylynn pats his chest sympathetically.  “I doubt that’ll be necessary.  The way those to go at it, I’m sure Aldrik will have accidentally set it on fire with their passionate lovemaking.” Raylynn punctures the thought with a sharp sniff.  “Is that - ? Do you smell smoke?”

“That’s it!” Baldair growls and in a whoosh of fabric he’s flipped her over and has her pinned to the ground.  She struggles underneath him.  It’s no secret that the master swordswoman matches the prince in strength.  However, her attempts to thwart him off her are half-hearted.  Because the truth is, that the hands already releasing her wrists and gathering her in his arms are exactly what she wants.  She doesn’t resist when he pulls her against his chest.  She doesn’t care when he refuses to let go.  And she certainly doesn’t turn away when his thumb brushes her scarred cheek and he lowers his lips to hers.    

A sigh of contentment escapes Raylynn’s throat, arms wrapping around Baldair’s neck on their own accord.  She holds him close.

The Western Waste is a blank canvas for those who walk it.  For years, she’d believed to one day pledge her sword to the crown.  Aldrik.  But it was only when the desert’s sand revealed another prince tangled in her red line did she realize just how wrong she was.  

“Thank you,” she breathes into Baldair’s lips.  Whether it’s to him or the Mother above, she doesn’t know.  Either way, Baldair doesn’t question it.  He leans his forehead against hers, a smile creeping on his lips.  

“I think I’m the one who should be thanking you."  

the end.

[nyxi-styx]

Anti Climax

(Antisepticeye x female-bodied reader)

((Play on words, see? If it was one word, “anticlimax”, it would be about disappointment, but since its separated it’s about Anti and climaxing. I think I’m clever and funny, okay?))

SO MANY Warnings: the smuttiest smutty smut, knife play, blood play, very intense sex, object insertion, this is not entirely consensual because of implied mind-control so maybe dub-con? ...idk, branding via cutting, mind control, probably some other stuff…. Basically you’re not gonna wanna read it unless you’re a demented little monster-fucker like me and @septiclaufey​ , whom this is for btw, just like my Dark Daddy story. Let’s go, let’s get into it and rub some… parts.

Thunder rolls overhead, but you pay it no mind as you settle in for a night of binge-watching. Thunderstorms are perfect weather for it, after all. You’ve just gotten past the theme song when the power suddenly cuts out through your whole home, casting you into the pitch darkness. Under your breath you swear as you shove the blanket off your lap and stand up, starting to make your way to the kitchen to get the emergency candles and flashlight. You hope the electricity returns before you have to go through all that effort, but that’s not exactly what happens. You can hear faint laughter echoing off the walls. It’s an all-too familiar laugh that sends a chill up your spine. He’s here.

Before you can even move, a pair of faintly glowing, green-tinted arms wrap around you from behind, a knife against your throat. The blade just barely brushed against your skin, not yet enough to cut. You gasp and shudder. “Did you miss me,” a familiar voice giggles in your ear. You find yourself unable to answer, but it doesn’t matter, the knife slides down your torso and up under your shirt. The blade is cold, causing you to gasp again. Your shirt may as well be made of butter for as easily as the blade cuts through the fabric.

The hand without the knife repositions itself under your rib cage as a pair of lips brush against the back of your neck, hot breath warming the nape. “You don’t even have to speak. I can feel your heartbeat. I know what you want.” His tone of voice causes you to break out in goosebumps and you swallow hard. He presses the flat of the blade against your sternum and for a moment you’re afraid for your life, but then he cuts through your bra just like your shirt, setting your breasts free.

His free hand moves again, grabbing a handful of your hair at the back of your head and tugging backward, causing you to yelp. “Are you going to make me cut off your panties too, or are you going to be a good puppet and take them off for me?”

You find yourself torn. You absolutely want to be a good puppet. You want to show him how obedient you can be, how eager you are. But at the same time, you definitely want him to cut off your panties. Before you can make up your mind, he whispers, “too late” in your ear with a small giggle as he uses the knife to cut your panties at the side seams. They fall to the ground and you’re left completely exposed. He tugs on your hair again and turns you to face him at last. Your home is pitch black and yet you can see him so very clearly. Blood drips from the wound on his neck as if it’s still fresh, but your eyes are soon transfixed on his: black and seeming to absorb light rather than reflect it. Now, you can’t look away. You can’t move. You can barely even think.

“Such a good puppet,” Anti purrs at you. “You’re going to please me, aren’t you? And let me please you in return. You’re going to do everything I ask, aren’t you? Give into my demands, my desires….”

Without even being fully conscious of what you may be agreeing to, you nod slowly. It’s like he’s in your head. Controlling you. You feel a warmth spread through your loins at this possibility and heat spreads between your legs. As if he can smell it, Anti grins wickedly. “That’s it.” He draws you closer and kisses you deeply, feeling you basically turn to warm putty in his arms. When he pulls back and licks his lips, that seems to trigger an idea of your own. Or maybe of his. You can’t possibly be sure what thoughts truly belong to you anymore. You move in as he tilts his head back and you slowly lick the warm, surprisingly somehow still-fresh, blood from the wound on his throat. Anti purrs in satisfaction while you adjust to the warm metallic taste. He may not be human, but he tastes like he is.

Suddenly his arms are no longer around you. He’s gone in a split second, but his voice comes from behind you. “Over here, puppet,” he beckons and you turn to see him standing on the opposite side of the sofa. On auto-pilot, you make your way toward him. He pushes you down on the couch, nudging your legs apart with his own before dropping to his knees before you. He leans down to trail bite marks up the insides of both of your thighs. You moan quietly, pushing your fingers into his hair. Anti seems to like this, or at the very least, he’s not rushing to restrain your hands from doing it. He even makes a sound… almost like a purr but deeper.

When he’s eye level with your wet pussy he stops to breathe in your scent, growling with a sort of possessive pleasure. He looks up at you, eyes still blacker than the dark room you sit in, and brings his inhumanly pointed tongue out slowly, dragging the tip over your slit. It’s so simple, but you can’t help but arch your back off the sofa just slightly as if feeding yourself to him. A chuckle rumbles from this throat and he eases your hips back into place, holding you there.

His tongue may add to his terrifying appearance, but it doesn’t take away from your pleasure. In fact, it’s able to explore every bit of you, inside and out, reaching places no one else ever has with cunnilingus alone. The tip reaches your G-spot perfectly, making you cry out and tug on the handful of his hair you still grasp. You reaction pleases the demon and he buries his face in your cunt, tongue still working you from the inside. The pleasure building impossibly until you just can’t hold back anymore and come with a cry, writhing in place, rolling your hips.

Anti laps up every bit of your wetness before pulling back from you, wearing a devilish smirk. Despite the intensity of the orgasm that’s just past, your body craves more. You whine and try to pull him back in, but he has other ideas.

As the demon stands, he pushes you to lie on your back, met with no resistance. You stare, wide-eyed as he draws his blade again. This time, he presses the tip into the soft flesh above your right hip, dragging it down, red droplets appearing in the wake of the cut. It stings a little, enough to make you hiss, but the knife is sharp enough to not cause any significant pain, even as deep as the cut is.

You can’t tell exactly what he’s carving into your skin, but you can feel small, connecting lines. You don’t dare try to sit up and look. Finally, he pulls the knife away from your skin and beholds his work with pride. “There is no question now: you are mine.” He traces the cuts with his index finger, smearing the blood. “A… S… E… No one else will dare to touch you.”  He licks your blood off the blade of the knife and makes a sound like a moan, but he glitches, distorting the sound into something strange.

Anti turns the knife in his hand, holding it by the blade, and runs the handle over your thighs, trailing upward. He watches your face as he slowly teases your clit with the end of the handle, dragging it down before sliding it into you, a perverse and makeshift dildo. It’s slow and you know it’s coming but it doesn’t stop you from gasping at the unfamiliar feeling of the foreign object.

It certainly takes getting used to, but it’s not altogether unpleasant. However, right as you’re approaching the edge of another orgasm, he stops. You think it’s cruel of him to do so as he withdraws the knife’s handle from with in you, but he’s never been above cruelty.

You squirm, desperate for the friction you’d just had, but it does nothing to urge him to move faster. Within the blink of an eye, he’s between your thighs and you can feel his cock pressing at your entrance. “Good little puppet. You’re ready for me, aren’t you?” Words escape you, all you can do his nod. As soon as he pushes inside, your hands grab his shoulders, a moan falling from your lips.

So quick it might have been a glitch, he pins both of your hands above your head with one of his own hands. He touches the flat of the blade against your lips. Instinctively, you touch it with the tip of your tongue. It’s cold when the rest of your body is unbearably warm, making it a surprisingly welcome sensation. Anti drags it down, your lip being tugged with it. He keeps the knife at the base of your throat now as he begins to thrust into you. Hard and deep immediately, no building up to it.

Despite the fervor with which he pounds into you, grunting with each thrust, the knife never pierces your skin; yet the thrill of it being there, of knowing he was in control in that moment of whether you live or die, remained. If he slit your throat, would you become like him? A black-eyed, glitch demon with the throat scar to match?

As Anti stares down at you, the black fades back to brilliant blue eyes and he almost looks human for a moment. It’s a feature he hides from you in the next moment as he leans down, sinking impossibly sharp teeth into your neck. He’s almost certainly drawn blood, but it doesn’t matter. All that matters is the pleasure that’s building again. His cock fits so perfectly inside and he hits your G-spot on at least every second thrust. The wild mix of sensations overwhelm your mind, making you dizzy.

“Come for me, puppet,” he demands, voice low in your ear and breath hot on your neck. “One more time. I want to feel you coming around my cock like a good puppet.” He sits back up to look at you as you mewl in affirmation. Moments later, you feel your body begin to tense as another orgasm overtakes you. Your mouth falls open in a silent moan as your arch your back, shivering and convulsing against the demon as your walls clench around him. That seems to be all he needs; his eyes go black again and you watch him glitch as you feel him empty himself inside of you.

There’s a moment of stillness as you both recover. He pulls the knife away from your throat and you see blue eyes again. He leans in to claim your mouth in a passionate kiss one last time. And then he’s gone, just as easily as he’d appeared, his words carried in on an impossible wind as thunder rolls overhead once more: “Until next time, my puppet.”

[aureumjeon]

Strip (M) Pt. 2 || JJK

●Pairing: Jungkook x Reader  ●Genre: College!Au, Smut, Fluff, Angst ●Warnings: Making out in a supply closet at school during school hours? Strip clubs/Stripper, Special services iykwim ●Word count: 6.3K

A/N: Hmmm some taehyung action grrr. Jimin will have his time, just you guys wait. btw jungkook is 3 yrs older than mc and taehyung ok Sorry it took so fcking long. Enjoy 

[Part 1] || [Part 3]

Finally, at home, you flopped yourself on the sofa and tossed your bag on the floor. You grabbed your phone from your back pocket and immediately texted Jin.

(You 5:49 PM)

-JINNNNN!

(Jin 5:50 PM)

-Yes, hun?

You screamed when he replied.

(You 5:50 PM)

-You won't fucking believe what happened today!

(Jin 5:51 PM)

-Spill.

(You 5:52 PM)

-Remember the VIPs you told me about???

(Jin 5:52 PM)

-Yes, omg I swear. Just tell me already! wHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?

(You 5:53 PM)

-One of them. Uhmm. Jeon Jungkook..

(Jin 5:54 PM)

-The one with the thicc thighs? *wink wink did you guys fuck?

(You 5:54 PM)

-Yes. That one. And NO WTH. Last night, when I was performing. I kinda saw him eyeing me.

(Jin 5:54 PM)

-Girl everybody’s always staring at you when you perform. Haha

(You 5:55 PM)

-Omg stop. Hahaha okay back to the story. I bumped into him when I was heading home. I fucking got scared and ran for my life. Lol. And Guess what!?

(Jin 5:55 PM)

-WHAT stop it with the cliffhangers I’m about to choke you

(You 5:56 PM)

-HE IS A NEW TEACHER AT MY UNIVERSITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(Jin 5:56 PM)

-Giiiiiiiiiiirl. You whipped. Tell me about it more the next time you come in. Saturday night? You available?

(You 5:57 PM)

-Yes, I have no plans Saturday night. See you then! Xoxo

"Ahhhhhhhhhhh!" you screamed at the top of your lungs, unable to express yourself. It felt like hundreds and thousands of tiny little butterflies swimming in the pit of your belly. Feverishly tickling your insides. You can't help but smile at the fact that things were actually doing great and not going downhill the way you expected it to be. You drew out a sigh of relief.

Fast forward the next day, you woke up earlier than normal to make yourself extra pretty for your teacher. Hair tied into a loose but cutesy top bun with side bangs resting just above your lashes. Makeup light and simple yet powerful enough to turn heads. Your outfit was a light blue tank top that perfectly hugged your curves in all the right places partnered with a white chiffon cardigan to make things a little more wholesome and plain black skinny jeans that accentuated your perfect ass. 

And for the pièce de résistance, you took out from your dresser the expensive perfume gifted by Jin last Christmas. You swore to yourself that you would never use it on normal days because there's no way in hell that you could purchase another of these high-end scents, but this time is different. You took one last look in the mirror and thought to yourself that this is probably the first time you tried to look good for a guy. 

Sure you've had a few boyfriends here and there but none of them were serious. The farthest you've ever gone with a guy was during sophomore year, you made out in the music room, he tried to get into your pants that time but you were scared that someone might walk in on the two of you, and the rest was history. You never had any relationship after that which kinda explains why you're still a virgin at 22. It felt kinda ironic when you think about it, a virgin working as a stripper, funny. You shrugged off all the unnecessary thoughts and headed off to school.

As you made your way through the door, your phone started ringing inside your bag. You took it and looked at the screen only to see an unknown number calling you. You had second thoughts about answering the call, what if it was a stalker? Or scammer? But you answered it anyway, what impeccable logic you had. " Hello? May I know who's this?" You asked in a soft tone. 

"Jungkook." 

Your eyes beamed with delight the moment you heard his voice "How did you-" He cut off your question and answered, "I asked the owner of the club for your number, I hope you don't mind." A grin made its way onto your lips "No, I don't mind. " You replied timidly. "Where are you now?" He questioned. "Ah. I was about to step out of the house. Why?" You asked. 

"If its okay, I could give you a ride. What do you say?" You thought about what you were going to reply. " Are you near X convenience store?" He added another question to his previous one. " Yeah! It's just right around the corner. I could go there now." You happily answered. "Great. See you." He hung up the phone. You locked the door behind and dashed to the location given.

Once there, you spotted a black BMW parked beside the shop. Not sure if that was his car, you took small steps and inched closer to the stationed vehicle. The window suddenly went down and you saw Jungkook. He stepped out and waved. Your eyes sparkled at the sight of him and made your way over to the passenger side where he currently stood. He opened the door and lead you by the hand to take a seat. He closed the door and marched to other side and got in. "Seatbelt." He said while buckling his. 

"Oh, right. Sorry." You replied with a hint of shyness on your face. Jungkook started the engine and began to drive. You couldn't help but stare at his face. His side profile was just as mesmerizing as his front. The line of his forehead to the slight curve of his bridge sloping down to the tip of his nose making it way back to his cupid's bow. You felt your mouth water as your eyes met his lips, pink and plush. Don't forget about his well-sculpted chin drawing a sharp line up to his jaw. Ah, what masterpiece of a person he is. 

Too immersed in your thoughts, you finally found your way back to earth and realized that silence had filled the confinements of his car making it hard for you to breathe. You had to think about something to break the ice and you had to think fast "Do you live around here, Mr. Jeon?" You awkwardly asked voice cracking " Call me Jungkook. Mr. Jeon is my Dad." He chortled. "And yeah, I live around here. My apartment's a block away from the club." he stated "That's why I was there last time. A senior of mine invited me. He said that the dancers there were amazing" he looked at you with a sinister smile "And he was right." 

You felt all the blood in your body rush to your face making you red all the way to your ears. A faint "Really?" Was all that you could reply looking at the window, hoping that he doesn't see your tomato face. He stopped the car at a cafe just outside the University. "Is here alright?" he said "I don't want to get you in trouble or have rumors spread about you. " You grinned at his words, he was so sweet and caring. "Yes," you said as you unbuckled your seat belt and hopped out of the car. "Thank you Mr. J-- Thank you, Jungkook." He smiled after hearing his name escape your lips. "You're welcome, Y/N. And by the way, you look very beautiful. See you in class." And drove away.

You breathe the sweet air in and then out "Ahhh~ If this ain’t a great feeling, I don't know what is." You murmured to yourself. Since you were early, you decided to check out what this little cafe has to offer. The bell rang as you pushed the door open "Hello, welcome!" The nice lady at the counted gleefully greeted you. "Hi, can I get one large Iced coffee?" You paused while scanning the menu "And a giant chocolate chip cookie." You added. "Is that all miss?" The lady asked not losing the happy tone in her voice. "You know what, today's a great day. Make that 2." You smiled while handing her the bill to pay for your order.

--

Lunchtime and you still haven't seen Jisoo, maybe she took the day off school. You wondered why maybe something came up. You made a mental note to call her later and see what's up. After you finished eating one of the cookies you bought you heard someone calling out to you "Y/N. What's up?" You shifted your attention to the left and spotted a very nervous Jimin. He sat beside you and interjected, "You look great, Y/N." You slapped his arm and replied "Stop it, Jimin! You're making me blush." While in truth he was the one blushing like crazy. "I mean it. You look extra good today." He smiled.

While you were busy chit-chatting with Jimin about academics and school-related topics, you heard your name being called out again "Ms. Y/N." You looked over the direction from where the voice was coming from and it was Jungkook. 

Your heart rate increased tenfold. "Mr. Park, Can I borrow Ms. Y/N for a while?" Jungkook asked the boy. "Yes, Mr. Jeon. Of course." Jimin replied. as he stood up from where he was seated "See you later, Y/N" he concluded and walked away. "Y/N," Jungkook said your name again, sending jolts of lightning throughout your entire body. 

"Yes, Mr. Jeon?" You asked trying your best not to look like a complete mess. "I need help with the handouts for finals, Is it okay if you come with me to the printing room?" He inquired. You can hear your heart beating so loud inside your chest while walking beside Jungkook and hoped that he didn’t. 

He opened the door to the tiny room where the printers, xerox machine, photocopiers, and other office supplies were neatly stored. "Y/N can you please set up photocopier while I prepare the set of handouts?" He asked politely to which you obliged. Once the both of you were inside, he carefully shut the door behind him, discreetly clicking the lock without you noticing.

"It's good to go, Mr. Jeon" you chimed while rummaging your bag searching for the cookie you were supposed to give to Jisoo "By the way, Do you like sweets? I have an extra cook--" You were taken aback when you saw him towering in front of you. He snatched the cookie from your hands and said: "Does it taste as good as your lips?". You felt him push the erection hidden in his tight black slacks harder on your stomach. 

You were amazed at how incredibly solid it was right now. Jungkook ripped the packaging of the cookie and broke off a piece. What he did next sent shock waves to your core making it instantaneously drenched with your juices. Jungkook took the piece, hovered it just above your chest and crumbled it with his fingers. 

Your pupils dilated at the series of events happening before you. Some of the flakes managed to stick to the skin of your chest while others made its way to your cleavage. Still overwhelmed, you somehow managed to speak "Mr. Je-- Jungkook. What are you.." You weren't even able to finish your sentence as he yanked your cardigan down in one swift motion exposing your shoulders. 

The cold air that suddenly brushed against your exposed skin caused goosebumps. His hand made its way to the small of your back pulling you closer to him. He let out a heavy puff of air and said "You drive me insane. Who allowed you to act so cute in front of another guy?" As he kissed your jugular passionately trailing down to your shoulders. You felt the hairs on the back of your neck stand up the moment his lips met with your sensitive supple skin. 

"I want you all to myself, baby." He growled before diving into your chest, cupping both breasts with his hands. "Oh-- fuck" you moaned. The way he has his face buried in your breast, It felt like a dream. These kinds of scenario only happen in your head when you're horny as hell except this is REAL. Whatever the hell was happening right now, it wasn't just pure imagination. Like putty, you melted in his grasp, knees feeling weak to the point that they wanted to cave in.

In that heated moment, pure bliss was all that you could feel. Your muscles were tense but relaxed at the same time under Jungkook's ministration. His teeth nibbled at the little remnants of the sweet treat that clung onto the surface of your skin. Occasionally switching from fervent kisses to sloppy licks. Lewd sounds and your feeble moans echoed within the walls of the small room, you pray to God that no one hears. Jungkook brushed his hands along the sides of your upper arm up to your shoulders, slid his thumbs under the thin strap of your top pulling it downwards until your bra was exposed. 

He chuckled "I like the ones you wore at the club much better." You were practically frozen like a statue, your face bright crimson and breathing rapidly. "May I?" Jungkook questioned while his fingers fiddled with your bra's closure.

With the flick of his thumb and index finger, your bra came undone. He stared at your chest wide-eyed, slowly taking in the sight of you bare. "Wow" was all that he could make up as he was utterly mesmerized. Jungkook could no longer hold his urges back and helped himself. One hand on your right boob kneading it gently, thumb slightly touching your hard nipple while the other made its way to the curve of your ass. 

Jungkook took one last look at your flustered face before taking in one nipple in his mouth. The way he stared at you was unlike anything you've ever seen. His eyes were dark, filled with need and lust. You felt like butter that was slowing melting under a heated pan under his gaze. God, he was so beautiful. You knew that what you were doing was wrong but damn, it felt so right. By the time his mouth was on your chest, you could feel his tongue trace circles around your sensitive nub. Every movement sent you higher in the clouds and all your senses went haywire. Your hand flew up to the top of his head, grabbing a fistful of his dark locks. 

You can no longer conjure up words, moans and labored breathing was the only thing that managed escaped your lips. The feeling of him against your skin was heavenly. No words were enough to describe all the sensation rushing in your bloodstream. The surge of adrenaline coursing through your entire body made you feel delirious, sucking you into a whirlpool of emotions that had you on your tip-toes, arms reacting outward, desperately trying to pull yourself up.

(Un)fortunately, you were in too deep, there was nothing you could do about it so you just went with the flow, riding the waves of euphoria. You shut your eyes tightly and saw white stars everywhere as you felt the warm breath from his nose glide across your fragile skin as he takes your breast by the mouthful.

His hand that rested on your backside carefully slithered its way to your front, the gesture that he made caused you to slightly jolt and push him away. "J--Jungkook" you pant out "I--" your breath was heavy, chest heaving up and down trying to catch your own breath. "What's wrong, love?" He asked as he ran his thumb across the apple of your cheek, his tone seemed sincerely concerned.

"I don't know If this is okay.." You replied hesitantly. "This is...." Your voice was laced with embarrassment and your face clearly portrayed the emotion your feeling as you turned pink from one ear to another. "..my first time." 

Jungkook had a bewildered expression on his face for a few seconds before composing himself again "Ahh.." There was a pause "Y/N" He pulled your bra up by the strap one at a time, hooked the closure back together and your tank top followed. You were confused for a minute, thoughts drawing a blank. What the hell, did you say something wrong?

Jungkook picked up your cardigan from the ground and dusted off the dirt that may have stuck to it while it was on the floor. "You should've told me." He chuckled while he handed the piece of clothing to you. Your brain was still fuzzy and only a "Huh?" was all you could reply. Jungkook smiled at the sight of you complete dazed, he absolutely thought you were adorable. He gently held on the back of your neck, pulling you closer to him. He placed a light peck on the middle of your forehead. 

He looked at you with sparkling eyes and said "You should've told me. If I had known that this would your first time, I would've made it more special." He laughed. His eyes were now crescent, crinkled at the corners. Nose looking all cute scrunched up and his signature bunny teeth that get your insides all riled up was showing. 

“Doing it for the first in a small stuffy room at your school wouldn’t be an experience to remember.” He added. It felt like light years for your head to process the things he said. You were in complete disbelief, the image of Jungkook when you first saw him was completely opposite to what you were seeing right now. His masculine exterior, striking presence and unbelievably sexual aura was only one half of the man he truly was. He was sweet, caring and thoughtful clearly shown through his words and action. Absolutely downright charming every time he smiles, his personality was bright and blinding. It would always shine like the golden sun and all you would like to do was bask in his warmth. 

Cheeks tinted red and eyes looking elsewhere to avoid making eye contact, you were the epitome of the word awkward. To be honest, Jungkook could spend all day looking at you disoriented but no matter how cute you were, he knew that calming you down and bringing you back to your senses was the right thing to do. He pulled you into a hug, his arms around your waist, chin resting on your head and whispered "It's Alright. No need to be embarrassed." The scent of his cologne filled your space and got you in a trance-like state, in no time you felt your entire body loosen up, the slight ringing in your ears dissipated and your breathing was a lot smoother.

“I think lunch break is over.” He chuckled, looking at the clock hanging on the wall. “You need to get to your next class.”

You bit your lip and gave a slight nod before unlocking the door and exiting the stuffy room. The moment you walked out, you felt the rush of air pass through your nostrils as you deeply inhaled. 

“Y/N!” An out of breath Jisoo hollered out your name, arms flailing in the air. 

“Jisoo! What are you doing here? I thought you took the day off since I haven’t seen around all day.” You combed out the tangles in her hair, it was probably from her running around and looking for you.  “Yeah, sorry about that. I forgot to tell you that my mother and I picked up my cousin from the airport.” She chimed. 

“Ah, cousin?” You asked.

“Yeah, he studied here at our university for one whole semester.” She replied completely out of breath “After that, he changed school because his dad’s work required them to move around a lot from city to city. Well, now he’s back to finish his final year with us, though not in the same course.” She giggled, holding your hand in hers. “I can’t wait to introduce him to you! I kinda think it’s funny that you haven’t met each other around campus when he was here before.” 

“Jisoo, the school is huge.” You casually joked “I doubt that I even talk to at least 5% of the whole school population. And you didn’t even mention that you had a relative studying here.”  You crossed your arms while her hand was still intertwined with yours. 

“Yah, I’ll introduce you to him later! He’s pretty cool you know. He’s really good looking and smart, too.” She wiggled her brow teasingly. “Maybe you’ll like him and he’ll like you back.”

You pinched her cheek and stressed, “If he’s as good looking as you make him out, he’d never fall for a girl like me.” 

“Why?” She then gave you a foxy stare “I know someone who’d kill 10 men just to be your boyfriend.” 

“Really, who would that be?” You playfully wrapped your arm around her neck and placed her in a choke hold, coaxing her to spill. 

“I-I can't tell you.” She wailed through her laughter “I promised him that I won't tell you and that he’ll be the one confessing.”

You let her go as a sign of defeat. “Fine, fine. Whatever.” You looked at her and grinned “You owe me a cup of coffee for making me worry about you, I seriously thought something important came up to make you skip class.” 

“Okay!” She pulled on your hand and finally headed to class.

-

The rest of the day was so-so. Lectures, presentations, lab activities and what not. Just a few more months, after finals you were already graduating and a free woman. You can’t believe that you actually managed to send you self to school and actually make it out alive. But you had to admit, being a working student wasn’t all that fun and games and even if your part-time job was not something to brag about, you still felt pride well up in your chest as you were one step closer to reaching your goals. 

For now, the only thing that you’ve been looking forward to this afternoon was the coffee Jisoo was gonna treat you. You walked into the shop you bought the cookies from earlier, the image of what had happened in the supply room flashed inside your head the moment she handed you the same pastry you gave to Jungkook.

“Hello? Y/N?”

Your friend’s words cut you out of your thoughts. “Yeah?” You confusedly reply. 

“Want a cookie?” She hummed sweetly. 

“Ah..” You hesitated for a bit before finally taking the sweet treat from her hands. “Thanks..”

“Taehyung said he’d meet us here after his class.” Her gaze turned to her watch wrapped around her tiny wrist. “He said that his class ends at 5 o'clock. It’s 5:30. He’s late.” She scoffed, slightly irritated at her cousin’s act of tardiness. 

“Wait.” The wheel started to turn inside your brain when she mentioned her cousin’s name. ‘Taehyung, taehyung...Where have I heard that name before?’

“Jisoo.” A low voice called out from behind you. You slowly turned your head to the direction of where the voice was coming from. 

“T-taehyung?!” You exclaimed, recognizing the gorgeous boy standing in front of you. “K-Kim Taehyung?”

“Y/N?” He was in complete disbelief as you “Y/f/n y/l/n? Is that really you?” 

“Wait, hold up.” Jisoo stood up from where she was seated and interrupted this weird ass mini-reunion. “You know each other??” She questioned with an inquisitive look written all over the face.

“ Uhh..” You rubbed the back of your neck, thinking of ways to explain the situation to your equally shocked friend. “You see, Jisoo...” 

“We dated,” Taehyung announced, without a hint of embarrassment in his tone.

"Jisoo, wait let me explain!" Your hands were shaking, your eyes flickered back and forth from Jisoo to her not-so-stranger of a cousin. Taehyung took the seat next to you which only made your heart pump blood faster. He still looked good, or even better than you last saw him. 

 "It was only for a few months, Jisoo. 4 months? To be honest I can't remember. I didn't mention it to you because it wasn't something too serious, a fling probably and I didn't know he was your cousin! If I had known that he was I would have never even considered dating him in the first place." You rapped the words out of your mouth, now your lungs were trying so hard to catch your breath. 

 "Ouch." Taehyung chuckled, he placed his hand over his heart. "I really liked you, Y/N." 

"Oh. My. God." Jisoo shrieked like a little child. "I can't believe you two dated!" Her facial expression changed in an instant, looking over to her cousin sitting beside you. "Why did you guys break up?" 

"Ah..." Your voice once again faltered at her questions, you didn't have the guts to tell her that your relationship with her cousin went awry because you didn't want to go all the way with you know what.

"We moved, remembered?" Taehyung's tone shifted from a calm and collected one to a slightly irritated and annoyed one. "Stop making everything into a big deal, Jisoo. So what if we dated? We're not children anymore, we can date whoever we want to date. And for your information, it sure is none of your business so stop sticking your nose up my or Y/N’s ass. " He scolded her harshly. 

Your eyes grew wider at his sudden outburst, one minute he was chill and the next he's like a volcano with his words like lava spewing out of his mouth. "Hey!" You balled your hands into a fist and aimed at his shoulder. "Don't talk to my friend that way, you little shit."

"Y/N.." The flustered girl tugged at your hands, tightly gripping at it. "It's okay, Y/N. It was my fault." 

The expression on your face grew softer as you saw your friend grew guilty over being too nosy. "I didn't mean to pry or anything. I was just really surprised that you dated my cousin without me knowing." She laughed "Who would have thought, huh?" 

She then turned her attention over to her cousin scribbling something with a pen on a piece of a napkin on the table, he sure had the attention span of a squirrel she thought to herself. Maybe that was the reason why the did not last long. "Would it kill you to pay attention, Taehyung?" 

"I'm listening, I'm listening... Sheesh. Would ya stop putting your panties in a bunch, cous?" He pointed out, stuffing the piece of paper in his back pocket. 

"Okay okay... I think I've had enough of this bickering." You explained "Jisoo, sorry for not telling you about me and Taehyung dating. It was no big deal back then so I hope that it won't be a big deal right now. And Taehyung.." You looked to you right, now eye to eye with the guy who had the face of a Greek god. Fuck, what did he ever do in his past life to be given a face like that? Well, He is Jisoo's cousin. Beauty really does run in their family. 

"It's great seeing you again, really. The fact that you’re my best friend’s cousin is flipping amazing and proves what a real small world it is. And you're totally right, we're not kids anymore, we should act like the adults we are and not let whatever happened in the past ruin the way we treat each other now." You put your hand out in front of him, waiting for him to shake it. He watched you intently, his eyes scanning your seated body up and down before reaching his hand to hold yours. 

 "Lets." A small smirk found its ways onto the corner of his lips, though you were too busy to notice it because you were now smiling happily at your best friend.

--

45 minute passed by so quickly, you wouldn't have noticed it until a text from Jin popped up on the screen of your phone. 

 [Jin 6:15 PM]  -You coming in tom hun? xoxo

 [You 6:15 PM] -Yes! See you then! 

 [Jin 6:16 PM]  -Yes girl, thanks so much for helping out! I'll buy you dinner next time, promise! 

You smiled at how sweet Jin was to you, he really was the sister you never had.

The small bell attached to the door went off every time a customer entered the shop, casually mixing in the music playing in the background. You were too immersed in the conversation you were having with your friends that you failed to notice the light tap on your shoulder until a stunned Jisoo pointed a finger behind you. 

“M-M-Mr. Jeon?” You abruptly stood up from where you were seated, causing you to lose balance and fall straight into the arms of your teacher.

“Are you alright, Y/N?” He asked, holding your waist and giving you the much-needed support. “Are you feeling sick?” He checked again, holding a hand on top of your forehead.

“Ahh..” You quickly pulled away from his grasp, fixing your messed up hair in the process. “I’m alright.” 

Teahyung carefully studied you, deciphering the look on your face as well as your body movement. He knew from just looking at how you reacted so anxiously around the other male that something was up, but he had to make sure of it.

“Taehyung, Y/N Ex-boyfriend.” He rose from his place and greeted the man. “And you are?” He quirked a brow.

Why the hell were things turning out this way? What the hell was this, a battle of who has the most testosterone in his body? They seriously looked like two wolves ready to kill each other for the title of alpha male and you and Jisoo could only watch in terror. 

“Jeon Jungkook.” He smirked with no intent of backing down form this little fight “Y/N’s Anatomy professor. Nice to meet you, Taehyung.” 

“Pleasure’s all mine.” The blond haired boy took his seat again, combing his fingers through his hair. “What brings you here, Mr. Jeon?” Jisoo cheerfully asked the young man.

“I was actually on the way home when I spotted Ms. Y/N here and thought it would be nice if I could join you guys.” He beamed, eyes sparkling like a puppy dog. Taehyung could only scoff at the man’s cheesy words.

“Excuse me?” Jungkook snapped at the rudeness younger boy.

“No, no. I’m sorry, you’re free to join us, Mr. Jeon. “

“I will after I buy Y/N a cup of coffee.” The black haired boy insisted with a sweet smile plastered on his equally sweet face. You looked at your friend with a pained expression and telepathically asked whether or not you should, of course, she understood and gestured you to stand with the curl of her lips. 

“O-okay..” You shyly followed him to the counter and ordered,

“Okay, what's the deal with him?” Taehyung hissed through his teeth, glaring at the man who was obviously flirting with you.

“What the hell is your problem?” She told off  her cousin “It’s not like your still dating Y/N to be jealous.” 

The boy’s cheeks immediately turned pink, he then covered his hands over his entire face to hide his uneasiness. 

“Shut up!” Jisoo gasped, she leaned in closer to her cousin and hypothesized based on Taehyung reaction to Jungkook “You still like Y/N, don’t you?” She reckoned that her assumption was true as Taehyung sealed her mouth with his hands. 

“Pipe down.” He growled, “Now, are you gonna help me get back together with Y/N or not?” 

Jisoo slapped the boy’s hand away from her face and shared “Sorry to burst your bubble but I’m already helping someone out with Y/n, and he’s a better match for her so I can’t help you sorry cous’.” She mocked Taehyung. The blond clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth in dismay. 

--

“Jisoo... Taehyung..” You whined, standing in front of them with a warm cup of coffee in hand. “I have to go. I remembered that I had the only key to the apartment, I have to get home before she does or she ends up waiting for me outside the house. I’m really sorry.” You frowned. 

“Let me take you home.” Taehyung implied, waving the keys of his car in the air. 

“Uh.” You hesitantly mouthed “Mr. Jeon already offered to take me home.” 

Both of the Kim’s eyes were about to pop out of their sockets and their mouths were hanging wide open. 

“And we’re going in the same direction as well so... I thought it’d be okay.“ You quietly noted. 

“Whatever.” Taehyung irked while eyeing Jungkook from head to toe. “Let's head home too, Jisoo.” 

And with that, the four of you left the shop and bid farewell to each other. Before you could even get into Jungkook’s car, Taehyung suddenly called out to you one last time, trotting in your direction. 

“Y/N.” He grabbed you by the arm and pulled you closer, sneakily sliding the piece of napkin he’d been hanging on to this whole afternoon inside your back pocket which caused you to jolt. He inched his lips closer to your ear and you could swear that you could feel his hot breath dance inside your ear canal. “Call me.” 

You’re entire body froze and his bold actions left you speechless. 

“Y/N..” Jungkook wrapped his arms around your waist and guided you back to his car. 

The car ride was silent, too silent. 

"Taehyung." Jungkook suddenly worded out of the blue. You felt a hard lump stuck in your throat as you try to swallow your saliva, needing something to wet your dry throat. "That was years ago." You nervously replied. "And It was only a few months." He simply nodded in response, placing his free hand on your clothed thigh, humming to himself. When you arrived at the convenience store he picked you up earlier, he suggested that he drop you off directly at your house. You politely refused and said that it was too much already. He was your teacher and not your personal driver. "Wait." He stopped you before you could open the car door and planted a chaste kiss on your forehead. "Take care." You nod and got out of the vehicle. The walk was calm and refreshing, the cool wind caressing your skin felt wonderful. You thought about the crazy things that had happened today.  Doing inappropriate things at school with your teacher, finding out your best friend's cousin was actually your ex-boyfriend and that said teacher giving you a ride back home. Today was kind of a wild ride, unexpected plot twist and what not, but you smile and sighed looking forward to a good night's sleep. -- You spent your Saturday afternoon lazing around the house, munching on Cheetos and binge-watching the new season of Riverdale. You decided to text Jungkook, asking if he's free later tonight. [You 7:56 PM] -Jungkook? He instantly replied. [Jungkook 7:56 PM] -Yes, Y/N? [You 7:56 PM] -Are you free tonight? [Jungkook 7:57 PM ] -Yes, What did you have in mind? [You 7:58 PM] -I'm heading to Jin's bar later, they need extra people. 10 PM [Jungkook 7:59 PM] -Okay, see you. You took your time in the bathroom, shaving whatever patch of skin your arms and back were flexible enough to reach. Vigorously scrubbing your body with a loofah sponge until it was squeaky clean. You then put on your favorite pair of sweats and not to mention your grimy old ass hoodie, slinging your backpack on your shoulder and left for work. "Y/N! C'mere!" Jin exclaimed when he saw you enter through the back door. "Whoah, I just got here and you're already screaming at me." You playfully giggled at the older man. "You know I don't allow you to do special service, right?" He hummed sweetly, something definitely smelled fishy and judging by the tone of his voice, he wanted something from you. "Right?" You looked at him reluctantly, anticipating what he was going to say next. "Jungkook." He deadpanned. "Jungkook?" You absentmindedly repeated his words. "Jungkook. Wants. Your. Services." He stated word by word. "If you want, I'll give him the heads up and personally assist him to one of our private rooms." You were dumbfounded that you didn't make a sound. "If your not comfortable enough, I'll tell him to try his luck next time. So, whatchu say hun?" He added. Your heart was beating rapidly inside your rib cage, each thump ringing inside your ears, you had to decide and you had to decide right now because Jungkook was waiting on the other end. "I'll do it." You confirmed. Jin's face was filled with delight, he knew that you fancied the young man and that the young man fancied you too. This could either go right and bloom into a wonderful relationship or tragically end into an awkward situation. "Then it's settled, you don't have to perform tonight if you're catering to one of our VIPs. Get underdressed and meet me back here, I'll inform hot legs that his date is set." He winked and carried on to whatever he was doing. "Fuck.." You exhaled, your chest feels tighter with every breath you take. "Y/N! What are you standing there for? Come on and get dressed!" Jin yelled, he was few feet away from you, signing papers in his hand. You shook the jitter off your entire body and headed towards the dressing room. --

"You're really gonna make me wear this, huh?" You whined, looking at your self in the mirror. "Yes, doll." "Can I at least lose the bunny ears?" You mewled. "That's the best part about that lingerie, doll. Can't wear it without the bunny ears." He proclaimed, admiring how well the makeup, done by him of course, matched your outfit.

"Whenever you're ready, Y/N." Jin peeped through the door, wiggling his eyebrows. 

"I'm ready." You announced, following Jin since this was your first time being near the special rooms. 

"Don't worry, I gave you the best and cleanest room in this section. You only need to worry about yourself." He joked, nudging his shoulder against yours. "Go ahead, he's been waiting inside for at least 20 minutes. Wouldn't want to make a man that beautiful wait any longer." 

You bit your lip and sucked in a deep breath, releasing it before knocking on the door. 

"Mr. Jeon?" 

END 

a/n: Should mc lose the v tonight (on chapter 3)?  sorry for typo and errors, will proofread tom. thank u

[jugheadangst]

You're Not Alone [part 6/7]

[ part 1 // part 5 // part 7 ]

Pairing: Jughead x Reader

Word count: 1,830

Summary: In which Betty doesn’t actually live in the house next to Archie. You do. And this takes place after the drive-in is torn down and Jughead is staying with Archie. Female reader, btw; sorry to disappoint ;~;

Warnings:  abuse, swearing, feminine slurs, implied prostitution but not detailed

A/N: ngl I cried while writing this lmao FINAL CHAPTER TOMORROW (probs...maybe Sunday...definitely this weekend tho I swear)

It's yet another late night at Pop's for Jughead but unlike usual, he's not alone. This time he's brought Y/N along with him - apprehensive about it as she had been.

"But what if one of the Ghoulies sees me?" she had asked.

"What would a Ghoulie be doing around here?"

When she went on to ask about what if someone who sees her goes and tells someone from the Ghoulies, Jughead asked her who in the area would be dumb enough to be working with the Ghoulies anyway. And she got sensitive about it. Rightfully so because she technically was working with the Ghoulies. But Jughead apologized and hugged Y/N until she didn't feel so bad about it anymore. An easy fix to something she admitted wasn't that offensive to begin with. But the hug was nice anyway.

Now they're sitting together at Pop's, drinking milkshakes. Jughead suggested sharing one but Y/N said that she "could drink, like, six of these and still have room for a burger." Jughead smiled at this because sitting in front of him as a girl after his own heart and perhaps his milkshake, too.

"So before Archie busted in," Y/N begins. "You mentioned that...well, you know. That you wanted to help me?" When Jughead nods, she asks, "But why?"

And Jughead knows it's dumb. He knows how stupid it is to want to help some unknown girl he barely knows anything about - especially when she's involved in a gang. His friends have proved how stupid it is to him by their insistence on not getting involved. His own best friend, Archie, didn't even want to touch that with a ten yard pole. And perhaps it's this that is motivating Jughead to help the girl. He wants to help her  because no one else is. It might be that he wishes someone had done the same thing for him all these years. Even though Jughead is adamant about everyone keeping their distance and doing things for his own self, part of him still finds himself wishing someone would just fight to help him. Insist when he says no, help when he says he can do something on his own, and just stay with him when he tells them that he wants to be alone. Maybe he wants to be for this girl what he wishes someone would be for him.

"I see a lot of you in me," Jughead eventually responds. And when she calls him out on doing her a favor out of pity, he explains to her what he had just been thinking of.

"Of course you can take care of yourself," Jughead concludes. "I don't see you as weaker than me. Honestly, I see you as my equal. I jut told you that I see a lot of myself in you. Maybe that's why."

Y/N is silent for a moment but then she lowers her head and whispers, "I trust you, Jughead. Do you know how scary that is? I want to and don't want to trust you all at the same time, somehow."

Jughead wishes he could relate but he really can't. Even his own friends he's a little apprehensive about. There's never been anyone he sunk his total and absolute trust into. But if this girl was willing to lay that down for him, he'd be willing to do that for her, too.

"Do you trust me enough to help you?" Jughead asks. When she nods, he asks this next question, "And do you trust me enough to go away with you?"

"What?" the girl's expression is one of bewilderment. "What does that even mean?"

"I mean that my life here in Riverdale isn't all that much better than yours. My mother - a lot like yours - had to leave with my baby sister. My dad can't ever keep his head above water and he doesn't seem to want me around. I've literally been living in the drive-in before it was closed down. Now I'm sleeping in Archie's room - who knows when it'll be before I overstay my welcome. There's not any more for me here than there is for you."

Reaching across the table, Jughead takes Y/N's hands in his own. He rubs his fingers across her skin and gazes into her eyes. It isn't long before he sees them begin to cloud and she's crying within that next instant. It's then that merely holding her hands isn't enough. Jughead moves from his place across the table and sits in the seat next to Y/N, wrapping his hands around her middle, and holding her tightly. He begins rocking her back and forth, making soft "shh" sounds with his lips pressed into her hair.

"It's going to be okay," Jughead whispers. "You don't have to do this alone. We can do this together." He shifts so that he can cup Y/N's face within his hands and tell her, "I think it's fate that brought us together."

Even though she's crying, he can't help but laugh.

"You're lying," she says following a sniffle. "You're either lying or just a hopeless romantic underneath your emo exterior."

Alongside a small smile, Jughead says, "You'd be surprised how well the two go hand in hand."

The two of them remain in the same side of the booth continuing mumbling sweet nothings to each other over milkshakes, sharing smiles and more moments. Eventually, however, Y/N goes quiet and it bothers Jughead. So he asks her about it.

"Do you mean it?" she asks. "Did you mean what you said about getting away together?"

"Yes," Jughead responds instantly. "We can go tomorrow if that's what you really want."

Y/N pauses for a brief moment before she whispers, "That's what I want."

And Jughead is taken aback. He was kind of serious but also not really. He certainly wants to get away from the hell hole Riverdale has turned into over such a short period that is a summer. Is that really worse than what he'd be leaving behind - his friends, mostly. It occurs to him, however, that he's made a new friend. One that relates to him and really understands what he's been going through this whole time. Sure, Archie's parents are going through a divorce but at least his dad is holding down a job. In fact, it's Archie's dad who is responsible for Jughead's own father losing his one decent and respectable job in the first place. His one truest best friend is putting a roof over his head, sure, but his truest best friend's dad is the one tearing down the previous roof and making it impossible for his own father to put a new one over him and his family altogether.

"Then let's do it," Jughead says after some time. "We leave Riverdale tomorrow."

Y/N couldn't pack up any of her things because her father either wouldn't let her into the house or not let her leave once inside. It's a risk she couldn't take. So Jughead did his best to scrounge up some belongings for her as well as take what little things he had. What would be the entirety of their new lives fit into two duffel bags. If Jughead had been doing this alone, he wouldn't think twice about it. But since he's doing it with someone else, it breaks his heart that anyone else would have to experience this kind of thing. Just because he can handle it doesn't mean anyone else should. And yet, at the same time, it's comforting. He's not alone. She's not alone. They're doing this together. And that makes it so much easier to do something he had been wondering about doing for such a long time now.

Jughead hadn't told Archie. He hadn't told any of his friends. Jughead hadn't told a single person that he would be leaving that next morning. And Y/N certainly hadn't. She had been with him the whole time after they had both agreed to leave together. That's why it was confusing, to say the least, when the two of them arrived at the bus terminal to see Jughead's father standing there with a couple of his gang cronies.

"You leaving for Toledo?" FP asks when he sees Jughead and Y/N walk up to the building.

"We're leaving with the first bus out of Riverdale," Jughead tells him. "Wherever that might be." Confused but more furious than that, Jughead snaps, "And just why the hell are you here, anyway?"

"Pop tipped me off," FP states. "Said that you and your new girlfriend were leaving this morning." Y/N had been about to interject but FP interrupted her and says, "Hey, it doesn't matter. You know what does matter?"

Jughead waits for a response but when it becomes clear that his father isn't just going to come out with it, he has to ask, "What, dad? What fucking matters?"

"The fact that even Pop can see that despite not being a good father, I still care for my son." FP shouts this but his eyes are clouded and Jughead almost feels guilty for a moment. This guilt only builds when he sees a thin line of tears begin to well at the bottom of his dad's eyes.

"It doesn't have to be like this," FP says. "It doesn't have to be hard for you like it is for me. You don't have to do this alone."

This always happen. Just like every time before when his father breaks down and tries to feed him sentiments about how much harder he'll try from now on, Jughead wants to believe him. He's always wanted to believe him and he'll keep wanting to believe him.

Jughead's crying now and he yells at his father, "I don't want to leave! But what else is there for me?"

"Your dad, Jughead," FP says. He's crying too and he walks forward, opening up his arms. "I'm always here. Even if I'm a piece of shit. I'm always going to be right here and I'm never leaving."

The father and son step forward and both meet each other with open arms, embracing tightly, crying onto each other's shoulders. When the two of them finally pull away, everyone except for Y/N looks a little awkward and uncomfortable. In fact, even she's tearing up a little bit.

"I just wish I could experience this thing with my own dad." She just manages to choke out the words around her tears, wiping them away with the sleeves of the sweater she's wearing.

FP beckons the girl forward and with a little coaxing, she finally walks towards him. Pulling her into a hug, too, he says, "Neither of you have to do anything like this alone."

"Will you help us then?" Jughead asks. Looking at Y/N, his heart breaking for her, he adds, "Will you help her, especially?"

"Anything," FP responds. And he does it instantly without a second thought.

"Let's do it, then."

[marshmallow-the-vampire-slayer]

MTVS Epic Rewatch #184

VM 3x13 Postgame Mortem

Stray thoughts

1) Reason #12761826381263813 why Keith Mars is a great parent:

KEITH VOICEOVER: "If you've eaten any of this breakfast, you now owe me. Invoices have to go out today. See you at the office."

2) It really seems this professor liked Logan, though. I mean, why else would he go out of his way to talk to Logan’s best friend to warn him that he was about to fail his class? I don’t know about you guys, but no professor would’ve done this for any student at my university. They would’ve just failed me, and that was that, see you next semester.

3) How long has Logan been holed up in his room to have the Neptune Grand – the fanciest hotel in Neptune – actually run out of salt and pepper shakers? Unless they got like a dozen for the whole hotel… (there were like three carts in the room, btw…)

4) I do appreciate how Dick comes to the rescue in his very unique Dick way…

5) Why did both Veronica and Keith believe this kid right away? I mean, this all sounded fishy as hell…

KEITH: So, why don't you tell me what happened?

JOSH: (...)There's a spot out on the PCH, this little turnout overlooking the ocean. My dad goes there after losses just to sit and mellow out, so I went out to, you know, try and talk with him. (...) When I got there, I thought he already left 'cause his car wasn't there. Then I-I saw...I saw this body on the ground, and I saw blood. So, I ran over, and...it was Dad. He was dead. Shot.

KEITH: You call the sheriff then?

JOSH: No, I couldn't. I mean, I-I-I tried, but you can't get a signal there, so I...I didn't know what to do. All I could think of was Mom and Bobby and... (...) I just-I just drove home so they wouldn't have to hear it from the sheriff.

MRS. BARRY: When he came in, he looked like he was in shock. He had blood all over his shirt. I-I told him to take a shower 'cause I didn't want Bobby to see him like that.

6) He looks so hopeful when he hears Dick welcoming the two sisters, though... 

7) Heather’s older sister was very irresponsible, leaving her little sister with a hobo in a hotel room. I mean, I know this hobo is a good guy, but you should never leave a little kid with a person you’ve just met. I feel like I shouldn’t even be pointing this out.

8) Look at this miserable hobo. *cry face*

9) Well, season 1 Logan would’ve gone for the frosted tips…

HEATHER: You want me to put highlights in your hair?

LOGAN: No.

Also, I would’ve been all for a spin-off of Logan and Heather just playing videogames, talking about Veronica, eating ice-cream and just having adventures together.

10) The magic of Heather Button, she made this hobo smile for the first time in weeks, probably.

11) You’d think the police would figure this out, right? Oh, right, this is Neptune, my bad.

VERONICA: No pieces of board or motorcycle tracks, but it's possible they were erased by other cars. It's weird. It...looks like a car went off right here.

JOSH: I don't get it. Why would they push the car over, I mean, if it was a carjacking?

12) This is true love, y’all.

I mean, look at my desktop picture…

13) I do love when Veronica gets played, though. She’s super smart and resourceful, but she’s over-confident (she still hasn’t changed…) in a way that leads her to underestimate others. There’s something satisfying about watching her get duped because it reminds her that she is fallible and that getting cocky could get her in trouble.

VERONICA: Is there anything I can get you?

JOSH: Ah, I don't know. Something to read, cookies, peanut butter if possible, a hacksaw.

14) Heather Button is wise beyond her years, though. This is sound advice, even if it then kind of backfires…

HEATHER: Well, why aren't you dating if you still love her? It's pretty obvious.

LOGAN: Because I screwed up.

HEATHER: How?

LOGAN: I did something that I shouldn't have done, okay?

HEATHER: Well, did you tell her you were sorry?

LOGAN: Yes.

HEATHER: Like, in a way so she knows you mean it?

LOGAN: Yeah.

HEATHER: Are you sure?

LOGAN: I poured my heart out to her on her voice mail, and she never even called me back. She's done.

HEATHER: Well, maybe you should try harder. Call her again.

Because, yeah, when you care about someone, you really should try harder.

15) Like father, like daughter… or is it the other way around in this case? Who knows!

REGGIE: What's up? You want me to check up on your daughter again?

(Reggie’s the Neptune Grand’s surveillance guy, btw...)

16) Awww!!

VERONICA: Dad, do me a favour.

KEITH: Anything.

VERONICA: Don't get murdered.

KEITH: Honey.

VERONICA: Because I couldn't live without you, and all I've been doing is thinking about what I would do if I didn't have you.

17) This is a great moment, though. It’s awkwardly funny, and a little bit pathetic. And did Veronica really believe Logan would’ve chosen a Nick Lachey song to get her back? Like, coming from Logan, I would’ve taken that more as a jab than an actual romantic gesture…

DJ: I've got a dedication going out from a very sad boy... To a very special girl. So, if you're out there and you're listening, Veronica... This is from Logan. He's sorry, girl, and he wants you back. 

And it’s even better because of Jeff Rattner’s comment:

JEFF: Take it from the guy who has to clean up after him. You don't want what's left of Logan Echolls. He just lies around in bed all day and smells.

18) And this moment is priceless!

I just love how Veronica just goes “oh”, like “she was out of clothes” was explanation enough for the fact that Logan was hanging out with a strange kid and giving her clothes? And then Heather is just the embodiment of any LoVe shipper, you know? She’s so giddy to see these two kids back together!

And it wouldn’t be a true LoVe in the elevator scene without lingering glances...

19) This was a bit harsh, Logan. I mean, he made a good point, but he was unnecessarily harsh. She is, after all, a naïve little girl.

HEATHER: I can't believe you blew that. That was the most perfect opportunity. Why didn't you tell her how you feel?

LOGAN: Because I'm not eleven, and I'm not delusional. You don't know a single thing about love, Heather.

20) Oh, Dean O’Dell, you big ol’ softie!

KEITH: "Dear Sir, in my twenty-five years working in academia, I have not come across a young person with more initiative, intelligence, and character than Veronica Mars. I enthusiastically recommend her and would be happy to discuss this remarkable young woman in greater detail. Sincerely, Cyrus O'Dell, Dean of Students, Hearst College."

21)

DICK: Hey, buddy. Got a question for you. You know a good lawyer?

LOGAN: I know a lawyer.

22) Again, Heather’s sister couldn’t be more neglectful...

MELINDA: Hey, Logan, is Heather doing okay?

LOGAN: Yeah, is she ever not? Is she always like this, so...bubbly?

MELINDA: That's kind of her new thing. Well, she started acting weird when our dad walked out. I don't think she can get it through her thick skull. It can really wear you out, huh? Just make sure she takes her Prozac, or she'll just drive you nuts.

23) Side note: do watch Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang. And The Good Guys.

24) Doesn’t this just melt your heart?

25) Logan, you cheeky bastard.

The pouting does it for me.

25) I think it’s safe to assume Lamb got a hard-on every time he publicly arrested Veronica, right?

TO BE CONTINUED...

[dirtylemonjoy]

~Yes Daddy~: Roman-X-Female Reader

HI~! welcome to my first story! this is going to be smut in here so there’s the first warring and there is some hard cursing as well. 

If you want to be notified on my next story just ask me to tag you in ^^ 

and enjoy the story!!!

P.s sorry if I make some errors of any kind btw ^^’

(l/o/h) length of hair. (c/o/h) color of hair, (y/f/c) your favorite color, (y/n) your name, (y/f/m) your favorite music.

Your Pov:

It was a long day, working a 9 to 5 shift at the office can be very shity 99% of the time from hearing people complain about how hard life is to them and as well the shity boss that keeps calling me non stop about how this or that isn’t right makes me sick. I was hoping to see my boyfriend so I can lay across the bed with him and cuddle all that crap out my way. I got home I took off my bags and whatever items the where left on me and threw it on the ground “I’m home !” I scream there was no answer so I walk up stairs and open the door and “WHAT THE FUCK !?” I saw my boyfriend smashing this hoe on my bed “ WHO THE FUCK IS SHE !?” and I got the whole ‘ babe it’s not what look like’ and shit’ I was so mad I just told him to get the hell out and go live with his mom or his new slut.

I called my best friend up and told everything and after I told everything my best friend told me about this club that new and just opened and told me I needed to forget about him and just drink/dance the night away, then told me that ( he or she) will be at my house tonight. after so many hours I was ready I put on a (y/f/c) dress on and I wore my favorite (y/f/c) heels, I decide to let my (l/o/h) (c/o/h) down and I looked at my self once more then I went out side to see my best friend waiting on me “lookin sexy there.’’ my best friend told me “come on silly lets go.’’ We drove off to the new club.

When we got to the new club it was packed with people just bumping and grinding on each other, me I’m not a big club fan I’m more of that person that would stay home eat and watch AHS all night long until I fell asleep. My friend grabbed me and pulled me into the crow and we stared dancing, after a while my friend off to get drinks for both of us so I was left alone trying to look for a table for us to sit at.

As I was looking for a table until I bump into something that made think I bumped into a brick wall, “ oh, I’m sorry didn’t see you there.’’ I looked upand god dammit I swear I met a god because holy shit he was hot “n-no you’re good I didn’t see you, sorry.’’ I said “ oh that’s fine I’m Roman.” damn right your name is roman cause you like a roman god “ I’m (y/n), nice to meet you.” I flashed a smile “ nice to meet you too, you have a pretty name.” and now I need new underwear “ thank you.” I blushed, we started talk and getting to know each other and come to fine out he as well broke up with his girlfriend cause of the same thing, we had a lot in common liking the same shows, book, and movies “ (y/n)!” my friend yell at me what the fuck dude “I’ll be back  it’s just going to take a second.” Roman nod and I went off to my friend “what the fuck you want ?” I said “ girl do you know who you talking to?” I nod no “ GIRL! you’re talking to Roman fucking Reigns.”  I stared to have flashback a then I found out I saw him a couple of times on TV on WWE and holy shit I got more nervous quick “ go back and talk to him you’ll be fine” I nod a went back to him “everything okay?”  not really “yeah everything is good.” I giggle softly “ okay and if I may say you look very nice tonight.” he said, I was about to go down the table and suck his di- “why thank you, and you look very good as well.” good? really GOOD!? you know damn well he look better than good “ thanks.” he blushed, and oh my if he didn’t look cute blushing.

After a few drinks he ask he to dance with him and I said yes why the fuck not, we stated dancing and that’s when the all of those lovely toxic drinks hit me and I started to get to comfy but I still knew what I was doing. (y/f/m) started playing and holy shit I got dirty, I started to grind on him and everything went dirty when he stared to dry hump me a bit while I was grinding on him I swear I died and went to haven, after a while we both got tired and head off and thanks to my best friend she left with some guy name Dean so I had to ask Roman if he could take me back to my house.

We made it to the house I opened the door to the house and offered a drink of water and told him he can sit anywhere he like, “nice place you have.” he said “thank you.” I smile, after a while of getting to know him more and watching some shows “ so a friend of mine told me you work for WWE.” I said “ yeah I work for them for a while .” I can tell he was getting comfy cause he spread his leg a bit more to let me see his dick imprint and holy shit it was big “d-do you like it ?” I asked and blushing knowing damn well he saw that I looked at his dick imprint  “ yeah, yeah I do but not as much as this.” he kissed me and his tongue slipped in a bit my lips, I was in shock that there’s a sexy man who’s kissing me like there’s not tomorrow “ wait don’t you think where moving a bit to fast?” I asked, he gave me the eyebrow and that’s when I knew this man had I different side of him, he gave me a dark but sexy look “ you don’t need to worry about that baby girl let daddy take care of that.” he smashed his lip into mine and I started to melt into his kiss.

After a minute of kissing he asked me where’s my room, I told him and he picked me up like a bride and took me up stairs to my room. We got into the room he threw me softly on the bed and before I can even look up he’s already on top of me kissing me hard but loving, “don’t worry daddy going to take care of you tonight, got it?” I nodded “no nod say it.” I look at him with lust in my eyes “yes.” I said “yes what?” he grabs my thigh “ yes daddy.” I moaned “good girl.” he said.

He kissed me again with the same lust he had, he began lowering himself into my legs kissing my inner thighs he lift up my dress so he can see my thong that was soaked, he chuckled “ well aren’t you just wet for me.” he smirked “please don’t tease me.” I begged him, he took my thong off with his mouth and stared to kiss closer to my pussy. He spread my pussy apart to see the juices “ this is going to taste good.” he mumble as he began to take his long tongue and licked up my pussy, that one lick drove me crazy then he began eating me out “ oh, please don’t stop.” I moaned then I stared to grip the sheets of my bed trying not to cum so quickly “ you’re just ready to cum on daddy’s mouth aren’t you?” he said “ yes!” I yelled this man was eating me  like a pro made me squirm under his lovely attack “ I’m going to cum.” I moaned loudly “beg then baby girl.” as he looked at me with a lustful look in his eyes. He took two of his fingers and pushed them in my now dripping pussy, I moan loudly and began feel a slight pressure in my stomach knowing I was on the edge “daddy please.” I moaned “ please what?” he smirked as me went faster and curled his fingers into my g-spot god I swear this man can make you whole life just by doing this “please let me cum on your mouth daddy!” I screamed hoping the neighbors didn’t hear me, “wait baby girl.” fuck me he started sucking on my clit hard to the point where I was saying daddy over and over again, his fingers was doing a come here motion at a fast paste “DADDY PLEASE LET ME CUM!” at this point I was grabbing his hair and pulling his closer to my pussy “cum, but say my name baby girl.” he said, “OH YES, DADDY!” I came in his mouth he drank very bit of it up “you taste so sweet baby girl, now turn around ass up and don’t make me say anything twice.”

I turned around with my ass up and made sure my back was arching aw well “yeah just like that.” he growled then smacked my as hard enough to leave a hand print on my ass “ you’re a virgin baby girl?” he said “(yes or no)” I said while moaning looking a bit nervous cause from that dick imprint I saw he wasn’t no little guy at all “ don’t worry baby girl I got everything.” he said with a bit of a growl. He took everything off “ baby girl you look very sexy in that dress but I’m going to need you to take off.” once he said that I took off my dress, his dick began it rub up and down my wet pussy “ I’m going to have you so fuck up by the end of this night baby girl you won’t walk for days.” he said in a sexy moan “fuck me please daddy I can’t wait no more.” I begged  “whatever you say baby girl.” he slowly enters  and just the tip alone made me moan loudly, “you’re going to scream for daddy?”  he said “ yes” I moaned “yes what?” “yes daddy, OH!” he fully enters my pussy making spread very wide damn this man was thick. He begins to pound so fast and hard to the point I was screaming nothing but daddy and begging for more of it, he flip me over on my back and my leg wrap around him  “ oh daddy you’re so good please don’t stop daddy!” he raised one of my legs up to his shoulder so can go deeper in my pussy “you’re cum yet sweet heart?” he teased me knowing I was on the edge of cumming on his dick “ yes, yes daddy please let me cum!” I screamed out loud I was a moaning mess. He keep pounding into me faster holding my hips tight, kissing my neck know for sure there was going to be marks there in the morning, “ god your pussy so tight baby girl” he moaned my pussy began to clinch around his dick “ oh god ro- daddy please let me cum pretty please!” I scream out loud he chuckled “ not until I’m ready baby girl.”  he growled he started to really slam my g-spot over a over again my pussy was getting tighter around his dick to the point I felt every little detail around it “I’m going to cum.”  he moaned going pounding faster into my g-spot “please cum daddy!” “ go and cum baby girl” and that’s all I need to hear from him, I scream out his name and came on him he did a few more pumps and pulled out and came on my stomach.

He went to grab a towel to wipe off the cum off me , he did a quick kiss on my lips and carried me to the bath and started the warm water and we sat there for a few. He got out the bath while for me I need help cause this man was not lying about how I will not walk for a few days so he help me get into bed with him, I cuddled on his chest and we drifted off to sleep.

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well I’m sleepy so I’m going to take a nap I hope you enjoy my first smut story

thank you good bye!!!!!