#bsdfanfic

[shush-itsasecret]

"I don't know why I'm here"

I saw a YouTube comment that mentioned something about writing a fanfiction where BEAST Odasaku visits Dazai's grave and yup I ain't giving any spoilers just read!! I started working on its art first and then some ideas about the fanfic popped up in my head so here it is!!

Only read after you've already read both sides of "The day I picked up Dazai" and BEAST for complete understanding.

Kindly-

Don't repost without giving credit

Tag me and credit if you draw the idea

No Odazai shipping in this post. I only view them as besto friendo

4. ENJOYY!!

--

The sky is dark. Maybe it will rain today. The slow, cold breeze is blowing, taking with it the gloomy heat of Yokohama. I see some children making paper boats on my way. They were probably planning to play with them in the streets after it rains. Origami. That's what it's called. An old Japanese art of making different animals and objects by the mere act of folding paper. I think I remember Sakura mentioning that she was learning to make origami turtles. I'll have to ask her about it later.

As I entered the cemetery, the earth felt soft and damp under my feet. The familiar smell of wet soil hits my nostrils. Wet soil always smells nice, like reminiscences of the beloved past. But right here at this moment, it felt like the finishing touch of the scenery. It smelt like how a freshly painted portrait smells of paint. I make my way over to the other side of the vast graveyard.

My feet came to a halt in front of a certain melancholic gravestone. Gravestones aren't melancholic. They're just pieces of stone. But this one exerted a strange, eerie aura. The name written on it felt unreal too. Everything about this grave is different. Even the soil smelt differently. It smelt of loneliness and forced heartlessness. The image of his last meeting with me flashed vividly in my mind. The youngest port mafia boss, Osamu Dazai, now lay silent in his eternal rest. They say that death is the same for everyone, and it makes everyone equal regardless of what their life is like. But I doubt the same could be said about this man here. His last words echo in my ears.

"Goodbye, Odasaku"

Odasaku. The name felt strange yet familiar. He was the first who called me by that name, yet it felt startingly nostalgic. Like when you....nevermind. I can't think of a way to describe this feeling.

"I don't know why I'm here" The words coming out of my lips aligned perfectly with my thoughts, leaving no space for contradictions.

"I thought you'd like to be the first one to hear it" The wind blew whistles as if nodding in response. "Kunikida-san and Akutagawa are helping me with the editing. The story you're about to hear is still raw but it's completed nevertheless. I hope you like it" I slid down beside the gravestone. The atmosphere felt welcoming. It was the first time I was reading my story out loud. Maybe it will prove helpful, giving me insights and a new perspective on it. I fixed myself in a more comfortable position and leaned on the gravestone.

The words slipped out of my mouth easily, as if they had been waiting to be listened to by this person. As if from the moment this story came to me, it had waited patiently, solely to make Dazai it's first reader. Or well, listener in this case.

I think I'm forgetting a few parts. it's easier to remember the stories others have written than to recall one's own story. My lips moved easily, in perfect harmony with the whistles of the wind. An instrument. I realized that I was like an instrument at that moment, my words being my music. They decorated the air like stars on a dark, lonely night. Dark clouds roared, and the wind whispered back, creating a back-and-forth melody. Maybe I could spend a little more time here.

I don't know how long it's been now. I left my wristwatch at home for some unknown reason. A few hours is my guess, though I'm not sure. I look up at the sky. A few cold droplets hit my face.

"I'll get going now" I stand up, brushing the dirt off my clothes. The coat had gotten dirty with the mud but that doesn't concern me right now. Akutagawa's babysitting the younger ones today. I hope they don't sneak out and play in the rain. They'll catch a cold if they do.

"When are we meeting next?" I was genuinely startled. There was nobody around. I could have seen them with my Future vision ability if anyone had come. They say that on rare occasions, under specific conditions, the shrieking of wind can sound like a human's voice too. The only odd thing was that I recognized this voice too well.

"I'll come again. There's more to the story and I forgot some parts too." I said to no one in particular. The words left my mouth and evaporated in the air, becoming a part of the scenery. When I looked back at the grave, it felt less lonely now.

I take out a cigarette and the matchbox I always kept on me. 'Lupin', it reads. The breeze behind my back gently blew through the leaves and grass, waving goodbye like an old friend. I think I'll come here again. This place might not be so bad after all.

[alhenaonthestage]

What if Dazai accidentally kissed Chuuya during their first encounter, nullifying his gravity control? And since then, he has always lied to him, claiming that his ability only activates through a kiss and not simply by touching him. Chuuya never doubted it because Dazai always went to kiss him whenever he wanted to deactivate his ability.

[kannellaspenta]

link to my new fyolai fic! please mind the TWs as it's about much darker stuff than the last. it's loosy based on irl Dostoyevsky's "The Meek One"!

anyways i'm so excited to finally have it published!!!

[fukoushite]

The Nightscape (BSD fanfic) chapter 2

Chuuya'll make an appearance next chapter 🫶 you'll finally get port mafia pov!

Shit's going DOWN in chapter 3

This is mostly an explanation kinda chapter, sorry not a lot happens 😞

There'll be more action from now on

Also sorry it took so long to make another chapter, as I said before, I'm a busy scholar....

Thanks to my beta readers kolya (same as last chapter) and yuu !!

-------------

Silence filled the Armed Detective Agency's office. Kunikida had talked to Dazai - Kumiro had to peel his arms apart from his neck, as he almost strangled Dazai - and the air around them was filled with irritation.

Kenji had come back from the mission earlier than Atsushi, Dazai and Kumiro, to report to Kunikida, who was guarding the Agency, which is why he knew what Dazai had been up to. He didn't take it very well.

Yosano, the Agency's doctor, had healed Kuuma's hands after the fight with the nightmare, and now the latter was trying to hold herself together not physically but mentally, as she was having a hard time forgetting her treatment.

She and Atsushi were working together on writing down the new information they had gotten that day, for her both as a distraction and eagerness to learn new information, for Atsushi merely as duty; both trying their best to find links and connections that could explain certain phenomena.

The sound of fingers typing on a computer, Dazai's grumbling, Kunikida's fast-paced writing caused by his anger, Yosano's satisfied looks; they all compiled together to form the mood the agency was in.

Ranpo, the Agency's best detective, was absent, likely at a case; Both Tanizaki and Kyouka were in a corner quietly working; Kenji was also absent as he was at the farm he lived on today; and the president of the Agency was located in his own office.

Kumiro sighed right after typing out the words "likely because", pausing as she didn't know what to type next."

Man, I wish Ranpo was here..."

Atsushi smiled, but sighed as well.

"He'd be useful, wouldn't he?"

"Yeah... I mean, I don't think I'm of middle class intelligence myself, but there's this one thing I can't explain..!" She vaguely gasped right after saying so and looked up, slightly surprised.

"I mean. I'm totally normal and that didn't sound cocky at all." She quickly added, with a single chuckle.

The boy next to her laughed nervously, not knowing what to respond, thus amplifying the awkwardness Kumiro had created.

"..."

"..."

She stuttered while responding; "Uh. Um. Any, anyways. Uh, Dazai, quick question."

She turned to him, and continued when he asked what it was."

Do you think you'd be able to nullify the nightmares...? We haven't tried it before, since we don't think it's an ability, but there are some things that can only really be explained if it is."

"Hmm. Well, I can try."

Dazai was sitting on a couch with his headphones on, hands behind his head and his left leg over the other. A red book was draped upon it, open, his leg serving as a bookmark when he temporarily put it there. He had been reading and wasn't doing anything useful to the Agency at all.

He looked up curiously, staring at the ceiling, clearly thinking about the situation.

"Hmm...."

"?"

Kumiro stared at Dazai, wondering what he was thinking. He was a very intelligent man and she knew he had probably figured at least something out, but she deemed it best not to ask. Seeing as he was intelligent, he knew when he should or shouldn't say something or hand out information that was better kept sealed within his own mind.

Kumiro trusted him dearly.

While she was looking at Dazai curiously, Atsushi turned to his left to face the man that was sitting there.

"Kunikida, can you ask the president for permission to schedule a meeting? We want to share our findings", he said.

"Sure, kid. I'll cram it in. We're quite busy at the moment, but I believe it's important enough to set some other things aside."

"Thanks."

Sure enough, a meeting was scheduled, and a few days later Kuuma and Atsushi stood in front of the whiteboard, facing the Agency members. Atsushi on their right, Kumiro on their left. They had written out everything they discovered in simple bullet points (including small doodles corresponding to the info, as Kuuma found it easier to understand that way) and knew what to say.

"So, here are our findings! Me and Atsushi worked really hard trying to figure things out," she stretched out the vowels in 'really' for emphasis, "but we both hope you guys can help fill in the blanks we missed..."

Atsushi nodded, seriously but proud at his work, and the other Agency members listened intently.

"Before we start; My university did a series of experiments on my request to find out more about the nightmares, for the benefit of Yokohama! Seeing as the course I take is focused on psychology, they agreed, so I've found out some peculiar things. Atsushi."

Kumiro turned to look at Atsushi as he responded with a nod and started talking.

"Firstly, we'd like to get a system to combat the nightmares. We've just been doing 'whoever sees it deals with it' and 'the person who stayed at the agency the longest remains there to guard it and for reports', because we never really had time to think about it together, but now that we're all here..."

"What do you propose?" Kunikida asked.

Kumiro chimed in. "Some kinda system where there's night shifts, is what I was thinking."

"Night shifts?" Dazai sighed. "Now I have to work at night too?"

"Not every day. We can do something like 'A, B and C take the night shift this time and D, E and F do it tomorrow'. That way we'll still get to sleep regularly."

"What if we just have half of us sleep for about three hours and then wake each other up to switch every night?" Yosano asked.

Kumiro was eager to answer.

"Nuh uh. It's bad to sleep so short. You should either take powernaps of 20 minutes or sleep a whole night!", she said, expressively making motions with her hands. "If you've just sunk into deep sleep and then wake up, you'll be even more tired than you were before! And also, I don't know about you," she continued, "but when I wake up I need like two hours until I'm fully awake... Oh, and we'd almost never get to sleep in our own beds, and we'd be running around all night..."

Dazai cut her off and said; "Yeah, yeah, got it. So we're doing switches every one or two days then?"

Kumiro nodded.

"Alright. Who wants to take shift one?", Atsushi asked.

The girl next to him turned to face him.

"It's best to have compatible abilities together. We could do the duo's we usually do?"

"...No. Those duo's are made to combat enemies," Kunikida said, "not literal blades of mist."

"...Okay, so new teams?"

After some bickering, said new teams were created.

Tanizaki, Kunikida, Dazai, Ranpo and Kumiro;

Kenji, Yosano, Atsushi and Kyouka.

The president would act as last support and would come out to help if things went south, as a last resort.

"Alright, everyone agree?" Kumiro asked.

The room filled with affirmations and nods of agreement.

"I have something I'd like to add", the president of the Agency suddenly spoke.

"Yes, boss?" She responded.

"What do all of you think about the conflicts with the Port Mafia in this state?"

The Port Mafia was one of the most dangerous organizations in all of Yokohama; dark, powerful, and intelligent; they had the most amazing gifted on their side. Not only that, but its sheer size was intimidating to anyone. The Agency and the Port Mafia were often in conflict, clashing like night and day, light and dark; they stood out against eachother like black and white.

But when night and day are together, mixed, beautiful scenery can be seen in both of them.

"Huh? What do you mean?", Atsushi asked.

"'The Armed Detective Agency guards the twilight, the Port Mafia guards the night.' I'm sure they will combat the nightmares too. What do you think about working together?"

The president spoke seriously and while he didn't appear too thrilled to work together, he knew it would be good for Yokohama's fate.

"...Well, as long as they don't kill us, I don't see a problem, we have a shared enemy right now", Kumiro said seriously. She didn't dislike the Port Mafia despite everything they'd done, because she knew they cared for Yokohama just as they did, and the times they worked together in the past were not incredibly off-putting. Dazai had slightly different ideas.He made a face, annoyed and slightly off-put, and said;

"As long as I don't have to work with that slug, at least."

Kuuma sighed in response.

"...Alright. This proposal will be sent to the Port Mafia base as well."

The president concluded with that and signaled to Kumiro and Atsushi to continue.

"Alrighty! On to the info we've gathered!"

Kumiro took a marker and started drawing on the whiteboard.

"So. In the tests I've done at my uni, we monitored some people while they were asleep. Consensually, obviously... One of which had a nightmare; we discovered the consciousness goes... somewhere else, when that happens."

"...what is that supposed to mean?" Kunikida asked.

"...we're not sure, but I've deduced from what the person said they dreamt when they woke up that it goes to a personalized hell, basically," Kumiro started, "How do I know? The waves on our machinery vanished after the nightmare appeared, telling us the consciousness was absent, and also because the dream, or well, nightmare, they had felt incredibly realistic, so much so to the point they thought they actually died and got sent to hell..."

"The civilian from a few nights ago said the same thing," Atsushi commented, to which Kuuma nodded in agreement, before she continued.

"The 'hell' was by both described as a big, open, endless white space, in which their fears and grudges appeared. Because both described it the same way, I think it may be the same space for both. Oh, and I also think there might be a correlation between dying in that dream and dying in real life, but there isn't really a clear way to figure that out."

"So. Wait. Huh?"

"Basically."

Kumiro started writing on the whiteboard.

"😪 -> have nightmare = conscious -> nightmare scape (white space + fears)

💀 in night. scape = 💀 irl ?"

"...does that make it a bit clearer?" Kumiro said, smiling awkwardly. She'd tried to write as fast as she could as to not keep them waiting, and her lines ended up a bit jagged.

She continued;

"'Night. scape' is 'nightmare scape'. I just didn't feel like writing it out," she chuckled slightly, "... Ah, considering this whole thing is like, super weird, I wouldn't be surprised if what we found out is correct. It would be... special, I guess, but it's a possibility."

"Mmmm... I see."

Ranpo spoke from the little corner he was located in.

"Do you think we're correct, oh esteemed Ranpo-san?" Kumiro asked him with a half-joking tone in her voice.

Ranpo's ability, "Ultra Deduction", allowed him to instantly see the full truth. He was the "detective" part in the Armed Detective Agency, while the rest was mostly just "armed". It didn't mean the others were stupid though; they all still had decent intelligence, Ranpo just stood out.

His ability, was it? Ranpo's Ultra Deduction wasn't truly an ability at all; he was simply incredibly intelligent. The president had once told him he was gifted, and Ranpo hadn't been bothered to debunk that.

"...Partially," Ranpo said, "you're obscuring details."

"Obs-? Huh? What do you mean?"

Kumiro was clearly confused by his response, as she expected a clear "Correct!" Or a "You have a long way to go as a detective...", not an accusation towards her truth.

"There's more to this than what you're letting on."

"You're implying I'm keeping information from you...?"

"...Not consciously, no."

She simply stared at him in confusion.

"Don't worry. You'll find out."

Kumiro wasn't sure what to say. She didn't know how to respond to the fact that the best detective the Agency had told her she was 'subconsciously obscuring details', let alone fully understand what that meant.

'Did I forget something? Is that what he meant? Or is there simply something I don't know?'

"...Okay. I'm not sure what that means or how to fix it, but I trust you know what you're talking about."

The rest of the people in the room remained silent, unsure what to think or what to say, not knowing what the accusations hurled at Kumiro entailed.

"...Um, that concludes our presentation! Yaaayy..."

Atsushi tried to lighten the mood. He was awkwardly smiling, holding up the whiteboard eraser, hoping they'd start talking about something else.

"Right. Thanks for listening! Yay!" Kumiro added hastily. She smiled, threw the hand that had been holding the black whiteboard marker up in the air and joyfully ended the presentation. A little eerie for the others in the room, as her excitement clashed with her accusations.

The detectives all stood up and walked out one by one. Kuuma rushed after them before all of them parted ways, and said;

"Wow, look at the time! It's almost dark! You know what that means..."

She smirked while saying so. She was actually looking forward to it, as she enjoyed knowing what was going to happen. This way, she knew exactly who was going to fight with her and when, and she could envision the battles more clearly in her mind.

She walked further, to the people who she had a night shift with.

"Dazai, Ranpo, Kunikida, Tanizaki, y'all wanna go first?"

Dazai groaned.

"Do we have to... I'd rather fall asleep myself!"

"You sleep on the couch so much I often wonder if you even sleep at night. Are you an insomniac?"

"I could neverrr... I just spend my time thinking about beautiful ladies in Yokohama that I could convince to commit a double suicide with me!" He replied in a dramatic tone, therefore not denying he barely sleeps.

"Sure, sure..."

And so, the five detectives remained at the agency, Tanizaki next to a window, on the lookout; Kunikida guarding the exits to be able to leave as quickly as possible; Kumiro and Dazai on the couch, waiting, and Ranpo snacking on a lollipop in a corner.

"You actually didn't sleep during the day today. You sure you'll be able to stay awake?" The girl asked Dazai, slightly taunting him, though in a way, she was being serious as well.

Her comments earlier about his "insomnia" were also only half a joke; she suspected he actually needed that 'couch-sleep'.

Sure enough, Dazai had fallen asleep from both the boredom of waiting and his deprivation of a nap that day, and he was snoring loudly.

Kumiro sighed.

"Really..? You're gonna have to fight half-asleep, then..."

Yet she didn't wake him up. Something she wished she did later.

[killuwumi]

A Colder Kind of Love

a/n; aaa Higuchi doesn't exist in this, uhh she vanished bc i couldn't fit her into this short in a meaningful way lolol. anyway first aku fic someone arrest me this is terrible.

Warnings |  a lil ooc Akutagawa, Fem reader? Gender is only really mentioned once I believe but it's not major to the story :)

Akutagawa was no easy man to work with, let alone love. That is why you chose to keep your love for him a secret. It was a well known and accepted fact that Akutagawa had no interest in romance, he was a busy man, and seemingly emotionless too.

Or that's what he wanted everyone to think. The truth is, he did feel things, so deeply in fact that it just couldn't show through to the surface. There were short moments, mere glimpses into the emotions he tried so desperately to shut away. You were always there to see them.

Akutagawa had been your mentor for as long as you've been in the Port Mafia. He hated the idea of having a student, he didn't feel as though he was qualified seeing that he didn't even get approval from his teacher way back then. However, an order is an order and he stood by that.

You had no idea what Mori's intentions were setting you with Akutagawa instead of Chuuya or The Black Lizards. Why of all people him? He only ever made you feel like a burden anyway.

Although he looked at you like you were nothing more than a problem without a solution, you did hold your own on missions. He appreciated that, he didn't want to "carry dead weight". As he often liked to say.

Even though he said all that, every night you would go home and curl up into your bed, hoping that he could one day look at you as something more than a burden.

Much to your surprise as the months rolled by, he did become different around you. It was only when the two of you were alone, he wasn't exactly vulnerable but he didn't put up such a defensive act either. Occasionally you would actually see him be stressed or sad, or moody and annoyed.

It was a whole new side to Akutagawa that he didn't even realize he was revealing at the time. He may be oblivious but he caught on to the small shocked faces you made that you tried to hide when he showed these small emotions, and he always wondered why you did that.

Or why you jumped when he said your name, asked you questions, shoved or grabbed your hand. It got to the point that he couldn't stand it anymore and stormed into his home greeting Gin on the way in and had to ask.

"Why does she act like that around me? What did I do to her?" Gin giggled at the question, since when did her brother care why you did something. But she was slightly wiser on the topic than her naïve brother.

She could tell right away what these reactions he was describing meant, and especially when you got flustered around him. Gin didn't know if she should break the news to her brother or not, but she thought it best to tell him to be gentle around you, and maybe just to ask you instead of her.

He groaned and moved to go to sleep, dealing with emotions was exhausting him, it was no wonder he didn't do it often.

When he stood in front of you in the office the next morning, hands shoved in pockets, looking you straight in the eyes and asking; "Y/N do you have some sort of romantic feelings for me?" With a straight face, you were stunned.

At a loss for words and a stuttering mess you replied with an unsure sounding yes. What in the world is he saying? You knew he was always straightforward and to the point but THIS gave it whole new meaning.

He nodded before turning around and mumbling something about meeting him at the fountain in town at sunset. You were blushing as he walked out of the room and you were left standing just as you were before.

Not sure if he was going to let you down or kill you, or what his motives were but you knew whatever it was you were ready. After months of tossing and turning in your sleep over this man, you wanted to know what he had to say about you finally.

Right after work you rushed out of the office, and went straight to the fountain. It wasn't hard to find, a pretty notable landmark new the PM buildings, but what was even more noticeable than the fountain was a specific black coat.

You slowed for a moment checking your phone for the time, knowing that Akutagawa hated when people were late. Oddly enough you were right on time, meaning that Akutagawa took care to get here earlier.

He turned his head and noticed you staring at him so he waved his hand for you to come closer. As you did you swear you could see a smile cross his face for just a second.

"Y/N, I'm not good with words, so-" He leaned down and pecked you on the lips it was so unexpectedly soft and gentle. As he quickly pulled away you were red and trying to hide your face, but something came over you that you just couldn't control.

You pulled him back down and forced him into a more passionate kiss, you could feel him melt into it, who knew Akutagawa was a good kisser? What a lucky lady for you to have been the one to find out.

[miumoou]

Not Alone Tonight ~ Chapter 8

Dazai X Reader 💞

After a long slow paced thirty minute walk we finally reached the place I called my second home which I shared with a couple of friends.

There was a total number of six of us with each having their own exclusive bedroom. We also had two shared bathrooms, one single toilet with a tiny sink and one large spacious kitchen with two well used coal black sofas and a TV monitor screen which was bought in by one of my friends from their own home.

As I reached out for my keys a wave of realisation hit me. I left the keys in my bedroom when I was rushing out to find Dazai.

"Oh!"

Dazai didn't say a word.

"I forgot the keys in my bedroom!" I exclaimed.

Dazai continued to stay silent.

"Ohhh what should we do! Maybe I'll message them but what if they are all asleep now? It is quite late....aghhh why did I leave them!"

Suddenly Dazai spoke up after being silent for awhile.

"[Y/N] over there"

Dazai's slender finger pointed at the blurry figure of a human through the door window which seemed to approach us closer and closer.

Then the door gently opened and I saw a familiar face. He was just a bare shadow a moment ago but now he had clear features. It was Luke.

His diamond blue eyes met mine. They were full of worry, fear and a slight hint of anger which was almost entirely hidden. His eyes were a little puffy which meant that he once again stayed up late last night probably drinking like he always does.

"[Y/N]? Did you forget your key? Why are you back so late? Everyone was worried!" He asked.

"Haha yeah I did...you know me Luke! I always forget things haha thanks for opening the door!"

"Yeah of course" his cheeks flushed similarly to the sunset I saw earlier. He always gets a little shy around me when I thank him which I find to be his sweetest trait.

"Your a real big help Luke! Like for real!" I gave him a wide happy smile as I lifted myself off the pathway into the house. I chucked my shoes to the side forgetting that Dazai was behind me. Once I realised that I did that in front of him I felt a surge of embrassment flood me.

"Wait" Luke stopped Dazai from entering.

"And who might you be?" He asked Dazai with an intense gaze.

"Oh well I'm-" I quickly cut halfway through Dazai's words like I cut through statements in Danganronpa games.

"Oh he is my friend! One of my old friends from school! He is just visiting [Insert where you live here]"

You see Luke can act quite overprotective and I'm not sure why. He woun't let me have a stranger over at my room but he'll let others do so which doesn't make sense?

So I had to make sure that he believed that Dazai was my good old friend. He can't know that Dazai is technically a stranger or should I say a fictional character which makes him sound even more suspicious!

"Oh your her friend yeah?"

Dazai gave Luke a slight nodd.

"Fine you can come in I suppose" his eyes wondered around the corridor until he met Dazai's chocolate brown eyes again. "Would you like to drink with me?"

"Drinking?? Why ask? Of course I would like to drink. Drinking is my hobby ~" he excitedly replied. Then he looked over at you and noticed your smile fade away.

"[Y/N] will you join us?"

"Oh well... I don't drink Dazai" I hesitantly responded..."I know that you love to drink so I woun't stop you but I woun't"

Dazai's eyes widened with shock.

"...you don't drink? But don't everyone?"

"Everyone but not me Dazai. I don't want to be like everyone. I'm not a big fan of drinking or the aftermath effects...and well you see I'm happy being sober" I smiled awkwardly back knowing that I'll probably be alone tonight in my room as Dazai will leave me to join Luke on a drinking game.

Dazai was silent for a moment. He looked like he was analysing the situation.

Then he turned back to face Luke.

"If [Y/N] woun't drink then neither will I...I don't want to make her feel left out after all that she has done for me. Sorry."

Luke's eyebrows rised. And his mouth line became straight like a ruler. His drinking proposal had never been declined like this. Everyone loves him and his drinking games. But now here he stood.

"Are you sure?? You see [Y/N] woun't mind..." Luke gave me a look which told me that I should say something.

"Dazai you don't have to...its ok you can enjoy yourself tonight you've had a long day!" I quickly faked a smile.

"No I woun't drink today as much as I would love to I can't make you feel uneasy." He firmly responded.

My [E/C] eyes glowed. I've been waiting for so long to hear someone say that they woun't drink. I know I shouldn't say this but seeing Luke like that makes me chuckle inside. Haha finally his drinking proposal got rejected! And I woun't be alone!

"Well then what shall we do [Y/N] chan? ~" he happily whistled.

"Oh yeah of course! What about you come to my room! You can leave your coat in my room and well you know..." I looked over at the pocket where the cotton white bandages were located.

"Sounds like a plan lead the way ~"

We walked passed Luke leaving him in his confused state and headed up the stairs to the second floor. We stopped at plain white door. A sign hanging with my name on it was almost sliding off the door handle.

"Here's my room"

I opened the door and let Dazai walk in first.

I closed and locked the door behind me to make sure that Luke woun't be able to enter or peek into my room. I also hurried to the window and closed it as well. My friends sometimes hang around in our small garden and I woudn't want them hearing our conversation. Then a thought just hit my head. I need to hide the bungo stray dogs manga and light novels! I quickly grabbed each book before Dazai could even have a chance to have a look and put them in a plastic bag which I found near the closet. I just need to keep an eye on this bag. I placed the bag inside my closet as he probably woun't look in there considering how private a girls closet can be.

Looking back at Dazai he was heavily examining my room. I could see his eyes linger from corner to corner as he walked around the small space.

Finally he came to a hult and spoke out.

"Your room is so lively. I like the use of blue in your room. Those posters with the hot air balloon with a bright blue sky, the blue double bed duvet with hummingbirds painted on it and the blue dinosaur plushie. It's very cute [Y/N]"

"Aha thank you! I tried to give my room a theme and in this case it's a light blue theme! The posters are of my favourite band BTS!"

"BTS?" he looked at me with a puzzled look.

"Oh haha of course you don't know them" I waved my right hand left to right.

Dazai sat on my soft bed trying to be extra careful to not mess anything up. He took off his coat, took the bandages out and placed the coat on a nearby chair.

"Hey Dazai let me help you!"

"Hmm?"

"Let me help you put on those bandages I know it must be tough doing it all by yourself all of the time and it's the least I could do for what you told me earlier!"

"Hmm sure [Y/N] why not"

I sat beside him and gently moved his left arm towards my lap. I took out the bandages and began cutting with the scissors which I grabbed before sitting down. Then I wrapped his left arm like a present. I did the same with the right arm.

"And I'm done!"

Dazai looked over at his arms "Haha thank you. You don't seem to be much of an expert tho! I've never seen anyone wrap bandages like this pfff" he laughed.

"Hey hey I know I'm not an expert but I tried!"

"I know but it's just" he coudn't stop laughing and smiling.

My eyes looked to the side I was so embarrassed. "Hey stop laughing!"

Then I grabbed my pillow and chucked it at his face.

"Oh your also feisty [Y/N]! ~" his arms waved around then he smirked I could almost imagine anime sparkles surrounding that face.

"You really are something Dazai!" I crossed my arms and huffed.

"Okay okay I'm sorry for laughing for real though thanks [Y/N] I haven't laughed that much in awhile~" he spoke out in a joyful tone.

"Fine fine I forgive you"

"You do??" Dazai got incredibly close to my face. His puppy eyes charmed me and I coudn't help but forgive him. I shyly nodded.

[raven-writes-requests]

Don’t Leave Me (pt. 2)

Rating: everyone Word count: 1.9 K Fandom: Bungou Stray Dogs Pairing: OC x Dark!Ango Sakaguchi Genre: Angst Warnings: Again, there’s some blood mentions in this chapter. Also, half filler chapter (does that count as a warning?)

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He got off her and laid down next to her, closing his eyes and trying to sleep. Unfortunately for him, his mind wouldn’t leave him alone, thoughts of his past coming back to haunt him in the silence of the night.Words he never thought he’ll hear again, voices he thought were buried deep down in his past came back to life. The voices he heard were full of hatred, the images he saw as he closed his eyes were nothing but disturbing. “You’re a monster!” he could hear the woman screaming at him.

“What’s the problem?” a man appeared out of nowhere, his voice confused.

“That… That is not our child, that is a monster!” the weeping woman took the man’s arm, as if shielding herself from the kid, her expression was full of horror at seeing the small boy in such a state.

Ango Sakaguchi was five or six years old when the whole incident happened, being the 12th son in a family of 13 children was hard, food and toys weren’t the only things he had to compete for. The love of his parents was another, possibly more important than the rest of them.

So, the small child, who was now covered in blood from head to toes and was tightly gripping a knife with a grin on his face, felt miserable when he heard the woman he admired and wanted to love him say those things about him.

Why wasn’t she happy? His small hands pushed his huge circular glasses up, so he could see both of them better: his mother was now trembling, her cheeks stained with tears.

“Did I made you sad, mommy?” he asked in an innocent voice that would have been cute, had he not being covered in blood. He looked down at the blood that was pooling around his feet. Its crimson was staining the recently polished wooden floors and his small white socks.

He could feel the wet, hot and sticky liquid soaking through the fabric of his socks. His feet moved around a bit, hating the feeling of getting his feet wet. 

“Don’t call me that! You’re a monster! You’re not my son, you’re the Devil himself!” her high pitched screams got louder, the poor kid could barely understand what was happening.

Ango Sakaguchi was five or six years old when the whole incident happened. He was five or six years old when he realized that his own mother hated him. He was five or six years old his heart broke. Even when seventeen years went by, he could still remember all of the sensations that filled his body as he did that.

The thick warm blood that painted his hands in a deep red, his hands shaking as he committed the act, the way his heart beat out of control, excited and scared at the same time.

He had liked the feeling that killing gave him, but even that couldn’t erase his mother’s horrifying weeps as her eyes were glued into one of her youngest sons.

The years passed by and every time the memory came back to him, there was something that he couldn’t stop, something that he couldn’t shake away. The exciting feeling that came with the aftermath of his actions were exciting to him, it was almost as if he was addicted to it and, the more time he spent without feeling his hands covered in blood, the more impatient he grew.

He never knew exactly why, why was he so desperate to feel that again? Why did he felt so good whenever he felt that? It seemed as if there was no answer at all, at least for the time being. Slowly, his eyes began to open up, the sun hitting him in the eyes waking him from his walk down memory lane. His hands were clenching, clearly affected by the dream he had. His jaw was hurting and that was the clear indicator that he had gritted his teeth while he slept.

He extended his arm, finding the spot next to him empty. Where was she? He got up and put on his glasses, his vision clearing immediately, allowing him to take in his surroundings. His hands opened and closed nervously, like he was ready to kill someone. Where was she when he needed her so desperately?

He got up from the bed and began walking around, his hands desperately needing something to hold on to, his glasses forgotten on the bedside table. “Ango!” he heard the voice he needed so much behind him. He turned around, facing her. Even if he couldn’t see her correctly, he just knew it was her. Without saying a word, he brought her to him and hugged her tightly against his chest. “Where were you?” his voice was low, broken. Showing how weak he was feeling at the moment. “I was just making some coffee.” she answered as she enveloped him in the hug she knew he desperately needed. “Are you okay?” He didn’t answer, he just stood like that. Holding her like she was his lifeline with trembling hands. His nose touching her head, he could feel the soft scent that never failed to relax him when he got like this. He kissed her head and, after quite a long time, he slowly released her.

“I am now.” he smiled as he took a bit of her hair out of her face. “I’ll go take a shower now.” he let her know as he turned around and walked towards the bathroom.

She stood there for a while, quite confused with her boyfriend’s attitude. It wasn’t something out of the ordinary, but it wasn’t normal either.

His hair was dripping wet from his shower when he entered the kitchen again, ready to eat what his girlfriend had cooked with a smile on his face despite of his dream. 

“Will you come back home late again today?” she asked with a soft loving look in her eyes, he felt bad, but the only answer he was able togive her was a shrug of his shoulders.

“I don’t know. You know how crazy the working hours are.” she nodded sadly, making her feel worse for lying in such a way.

“It just… sucks that the government is using you to spy on the mafia in such a way…” the wave of guilt inside of his chest intensified as those words escaped her lips. She had no idea, she wasn’t even suspicious about the lies that he had told her.

She had no idea and just the thought of her waiting hopefully for him to return as if he was a superhero broke his heart farther. He took a deep breath as he forced himself to keep composed. He had lied to her not only for her own safety, but also so she wouldn’t fear him.

The man known to the world as Ango Sakaguchi was walking slowly down the street. His eyes seemed lost behind those two circles of glass he called glasses and they were only focused in the floor in front of him.

“Oh my God! I’m so sorry!” a girly voice exclaimed, then he felt something in his arm. A girl had ran into him, she was holding what looked like a paper map as she blushed, embarrassed. “I’m so sorry, I was trying to figure out where I was and I couldn’t see anything in front of me.” As soon as she looked up at him, he could feel his eyes opening up. The girl in front of him was cute, she was probably a few years younger as well as shorter than himself. Immediately, he could feel himself being drawn by her. What was it? “Do you need help?” he asked before he could stop himself. He was walking towards the mafia headquarters, the first thing he had to do was to get information out of someone by any means necessary. And yet, there he was, wasting his time with a cute smiling girl that he barely knew.

“Yes, I think I’m lost. You see, I just moved here and I was looking for…” he was so distracted by the girl that had landed in his arms that he could barely listen to what she was saying without thinking about how soft and sweet her voice was.

“You were going to work?” she asked and immediately turned red with shame. “Oh my God, I’m so sorry. I wasn’t… I didn’t mean to ask…” she stuttered, even more red.

Ango smiled, her red cheeks making him feel warm inside, something that he wasn’t used to feeling. “It’s okay. Yes, I was on my way to work.” he answered as he began to walk towards the address she had written down in a corner of the map.

The girl’s eyes immediately lit up, she clearly wasn’t expecting such a reaction from him. “Where do you work?” she asked. He panicked, what was he supposed to say? That he was an executive in the most violent mafia in Yokohama?

It took him a few seconds to gather his thoughts and let out a coherent answer. “I work for the government.” he let out. Why did he tell a lie? Why was he so reluctant to tell this unknown girl the truth?

He stopped at a corner with a huge smile on his face. “This is where we have to separate. The place that you were looking for should be that way.” he said as he pointed at his left. The girl suddenly looked really sad. “What is it?” he asked with a curious tone of voice.

“Oh, it’s nothing… I just… “ she sighed, as if he was about to judge her. ”Since I’m new here I was hoping to make some friends and… you’re the first one you has talked to me without sounding annoyed and… I was hoping you could maybe be my friend?” 

No, that was exactly what Ango wanted to avoid. Anyone who wasn’t part of the mafia wasn’t supposed to have any kind of relationship with him. He was supposed to be the scariest member of the mafia, then… Why was he swooning over some girl that he had just met? 

“Of course.” his mouth let the words out again before he was even able to process what he was agreeing to. “I would love to have such a nice girl as my friend.” he said as he smiled at her.

“Thank you so much!” she exclaimed, sounding as happy as a child who got the candy they wanted. “Here.” he took a crumpled piece of paper and wrote a few numbers. “This is my phone number, call me whenever you want to meet up, okay?” he nodded and she smiled. “I’ve got to go now, uhm…” she hesitated.

“Ango… Ango Sakaguchi.” he filled for her.

“I’ve got to go now, Ango. It was nice to meet you!” She turned around and began walking before he could even ask her name, the only thing he had left was a crumpled piece of paper with some random numbers on it. A smile formed on his lips as he watched her walk away, there was something about her… He had no idea what it was, but he was going to find it out.

He looked at the girl who was sitting in front of him and smiled, after all the times he had let her down due to his work, she was still by his side with a smile on her face. Ready to calm him down and put a smile on his whenever he needed it.

[alhenaonthestage]

"We should discuss this and release him all at once," Dazai complained. "Do you want to kill me or what?" Chuuya protested angrily, as Yosano gently guided him to sit on the bench. "Come on," Yosano said in a more conciliatory tone, "I don't think you'd break any bones from that height. I don't think you'd any bruises either," she emphasized. "What kind of aspiring doctor are you?" Chuuya retorted. "I'm being completely honest with you."

The days at university continued to be hectic for Chuuya as he reunited with all those people he had spent his high school years with in Japan. Four years had passed, but it seemed like everything was still the same... But would it be the same with Dazai?

New chapter of "Because of You" on AO3 (with Soukoku as the main pairing). University chapter where Chuuya's group - Dazai - Yosano - Ranpo - continue their usual activities, disrupting Chuuya's life after his return.

[alhenaonthestage]

Back to their sixteen...

"Where are you going so fast?" she asked. She already knew where he was going, she asked for the sake of formality. "Dazai isn't at school."

"How did you let him escape?!"

"Just because we thought you were going to leave him in a sorry state."

"At least!"

As if that threat didn't pose any problem, Yosano clapped Chuuya on the shoulder. He tensed at her touch, trying to contain the anger he felt.

"Yes, yes," she said in a monotonous tone. "Let's try not to start World War III today, okay?"

"You've seen what he's done!" Chuuya protested.

"Several people have seen it," Rampo added. He might have been trying to help Yosano, but his comment had just the opposite effect.

"Well, now inhale and exhale calmly," Yosano asked him, pretending not to have heard Rampo's comment.

"As if I could," Chuuya complained, although he had to admit that his anger had subsided slightly. It was always like this, he was like dynamite. A lot of noise at first, but soon it went out. "I won't forgive you for helping him escape from this."

"Tomorrow you can do whatever you want with him," Yosano smiled forcibly. "I'll leave you the chainsaw."

.

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Double release of 'Because of You' on AO3. See you next Sunday! Hope you enjoy these two chapters! ;)

[alhenaonthestage]

Under the fireworks - 1 (on Wattpad)  Todo empezó porqué Dazai pidió aquel deseo en su cumpleaños. No imaginó que Chuuya lo haría realidad incluso después de su traición [Soukoku]

[alhenaonthestage]

Under the fireworks - 13 (on Wattpad) Chuuya se encuentra con Dazai por su cumpleaños, pero la tensión entre ellos es evidente... ¿Cómo se resolverá eso?

Capítulo 13 publicado ;)

[alhenaonthestage]

Under the fireworks - 16 (on Wattpad)  ¿Cómo culminará la tensión que se está generando entre Chuuya y Dazai? 

Nuevo capítulo para empezar la semana ;)

[alhenaonthestage]

Under the fireworks - 12 (on Wattpad) Las cosas siguen tensas entre Dazai y Chuuya, más después de que este fuera a buscarle para su cumpleaños, confesándose... ¿Se lo habrá dicho? 

[alhenaonthestage]

Under the fireworks - 18 (on Wattpad) Y después de la noche... Viene una mañana ¿Complicada? ¿Cómo seguirá la misión de Chuuya y Dazai después de esa noche?

[alhenaonthestage]

Under the fireworks - 7 (on Wattpad) Chuuya busca a Dazai sin demasiado éxito. Parece que lo está esquivando y ser escurridizo es una de sus mejores habilidades. Pero Chuuya era terco, y eso siempre le hacía ganar. 

[alhenaonthestage]

Under the fireworks - 5 (on Wattpad)  Dazai y Chuuya siguen con su incomprensión mutua. Dazai está dispuesto a usar evasivas y preparar una ‘huida hacia adelante’ ¿se lo permitirá Chuuya?