#bro opened up the Dr Pepper I was saving

[miss-floral-thief]

Ugh I should’ve kept the cans in my room

[cherrycola27]

To Hec and Back

Warnings: Language, alcohol consumption, exotic dancers, allusions to smut. 18+ Minors DNI

Previous Part

...........................................

Part 10

Everyone thought you and Jake were crazy for trying to plan a wedding in three months, but somehow, you did it. It was October, and your wedding was a week away.

Jake's family was flying in today, and the two of you were at the airport to greet them. They were so excited to see you again and ready for the wedding. You'd spent the first part of the week with your bridal party and future mother in law and grandmother in law getting pampered with mani- pedis, massages, and skin care. They were so excited to take you out for your Bachelorette night on Thursday before the rehearsal dinner on Friday and the wedding on Saturday.

However, it was Wednesday, the night of Jake's Bachelor party.

You had already called and arranged it with Marco, the owner of the club you had danced at. He agreed to shut it down for the night as a favor to you. Some of your dancer friends agreed to come in and help you with your plan. Of course, you had offered to pay them, but no one was willing to accept your money, all of them claiming it was their gift to you.

Jake and the boys had just come in and taken their seats. Kara, the cocktail waitress, handed each of them a glass of Jake's favorite scotch, except for Bob, who had a crisp Dr. Pepper.

"Nervous?" Amethyst asked you as you peeked out to them.

"A little. I mean, I've done this hundreds of times but it feels— different" You breath out.

"It's your last time doing this. And you're doing it for your fiancée—it is different" She jokes with you.

The house lights flicker, signaling that it is time to get into position.

You adjust your cowgirl costume and take your mark. You hear DDawg announcing the set. You take a deep breath. The lights dim, and the opening beats of the first song begin as the curtain opens.

You had decided to do a group number with the girls. Then a few of them would do a few solos and small groups. The night would end with your final dance.

You could hear Jake's laugh as soon as he recognized the tune of "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy" blast through the speakers. You made your way up to the front and center of the group.

Jake had a huge smile plastered on his face. You also noticed that all the boys of the Dagger Squad had their jaws hanging open when they recognized you.

Jake neglected to tell them that the strip club they were going to was yours, and he never told them about your secret.

It took them all a few minutes to recover before they were cheered and letting bills fly.

As the bridge of the song played, all of you exited off the stage and found a cowboy to ride. Yours was waiting for you with open arms.

As you gave him a lap dance, Jake plucked your hat off of your head and placed it on his with a wink.

The song began to wind down as all of you made your way back to the stage for the final bars. As the music faded out, everyone collected their spoils and made their way back to the changing room.

A pop song filled the speakers as everyone scrambled to change for their next sets.

You could only imagine the conversation Jake was having right now

.......................

"Jake! How come you never told us, man!" Coyote chastises him as the dancers exit. "Seriously, bro! I can't believe Hecate is a stripper!" He shakes his head in disbelief.

"It wasn't my secret to tell." Jake defends himself as he sips his scotch.

"How did you even find out about her doing this?" Rooster ask him.

"You remember the day I called her a bitch and she threw a drink in my face?" Jake asks.

"With great joy." Bob smirks.

"Well, I came here after and stumbled upon her set, and the rest is history." Jake shrugged.

"So every weekend when you said you had plans—you were here?" Yale asks.

"Yes," Jake sighs as he finishes his drink. The cocktail waitress is quick to bring him another. But she tells him that per your request, his limit is three. She winks at him before sauntering off.

Soon, the stage is filled with girls again, but you're missing. He wonders where you are and what you have planned as the night glides on.

..........................

You can hear the music from another song fade. It's just about time for the last dance of the night. Your last dance. Something you had choreographed just for Jake.

You looked yourself over in the mirror. Your hair hung in loose curls. You had sultry, smokey sliver eye makeup, and your favorite deep red Mac lipstick in the shade "Sin," graced your lips.

You wore a gorgeous pair of silver glitter heels and black sheer tights. A black bodysuit with the constellations of the night hugged your frame. It was more modest with long sleeves, but the plunging neckline made it just sexy enough.

You topped your look off with a silver and rhinestone halo headband of stars and moons. You truly looked and felt like a goddess.

You walked out of the dressing room and took you position at the side of the stage. The shadow screen had been lowered down for the first part of your dance.

You knew it wasn't a full house out there, but the fact that your fellow pilots, you coworkers from the club, and most importantly Jake, were going to be watching you, had your stomach in knots.

You heard DDawg's voice through the speakers announcing you one last time, "Ladies and gentlemen, The Oasis is proud to present, in her very last performance—Hecate."

You could hear the cheers for you. Soon, the first beats of "Take Me to Church" filled the room. While this didn't seem like the typical song you would dance to, its lyrics held meaning for you. The tune was perfect for what you were about to do.

You strutted out on the stage. You were backlight, so only your shadowy form was visible.

You began the well rehearsed movements of your routine, flowing with the melody of the song. You expected to hear cheers or shouts, but the only sound was Hoizers haunting voice echoing off the walls.

As an "Amen" rang out and bounced around the room, you climb the pole, almost to the top, but not all the way.

As the string instruments hit, your twist your body in time with them and slide down, landing on your knees just as the first chorus plays and the shadow screen rises up.

The moment it happens, the onlookers cry out for you with cheers and praise.

This is the first time you see everyone. Your eyes immediately land on Jake.

He watches you, enamored with every move your body makes. Even though he's seen you do this dozens of times and knows what it feels like to have you pressed against him in the most erotic way, he can't take his eyes off of you. He knows you're putting on a show just for him.

Jake feels all of the blood in his body rushing south as you crawl across the stage to him. You part his thighs and perch on your knees between him, almost like you're about to pray.

You draw your hands across your form, the black bodysuit accentuating your chest as you arch your back. His eyes never leave you. He can hear the shouts and whistles of the rest of the Dagger boys behind him, but all he can focus on is you.

Your body flows in sync with the music, commanding his attention. He's never seen you dance like this. With such fire, such passion. It's—intimate in a way. Like you're bearing your soul to him.

He watches your hips sway as you return to the stage and climb the pole. Another loud "amen" rings out through the speakers. "Amen!" Rooster whoops out. All Jake can think is, "Amen indeed." He adjusts himself through his trousers. Jake watches your body slide down the pole as another sinful thought about how he would gladly get on his knees and worship you, his goddess, right here in front of everyone if you'd let him.

The song is almost finished, and you prepare yourself for the big finale you have planned.

You elegantly climb the pole to the very top. And stretch your arm out, blowing Jake a kiss. Just as the last notes are being playing, you quickly drop from the top, sliding the whole length of the pole, landing in a split. Just as the bright lights fade to black and the curtain closes

You can hear everyone losing their minds, cheering, yelling, and whistling. You take a deep breath before standing up. The curtain raises again as you step forward to take a bow with tears in your eyes.

Jake rushes forward to embrace you. He's babbling out praise and peppering you with kisses.

Soon, everyone else joins him, and they are complimenting you. You can't help but laugh when Bob comes up to you and says, "Hecate! You were amazing, but I think we are all going to have to go to church after that."

The night ends with you and Jake leaving the club hand in hand to head home. The whole drive, he keeps telling you how amazing you were, but the adrenaline from it all has finally worn off. You fall asleep on the drive home, and he has to cary you inside to tuck you in.

The next morning, you were awoken at five to the sound of Phoenix beating on your door.

"Phoenix! What the fuck!" You scolded as you opened the door. She ignored you, brushing by as she, Halo, Charli, and Savannah all filed into your living room.

"It is five o'clock in the morning. What are all of you doing here?" You asked them.

"We are here to help you get ready for your Bachelorette day!" Phoenix cheered. For the first time, you noticed what they were wearing. All of them were dressed in matching "Bride Tribe" t-shirts and shorts.

"Where are we going? And why do we have to be up so early.

"We are taking you to Disneyland!" Charli squeals.

"Disneyland?" You look at her confused.

"Yes! And rope drop is at eight which means we need to be through security by seven thirty and it's an hour and a half away and I've planned for one bathroom slash food stop so we need to be out the door and in the car in thirty minutes!" Phoenix proclaims.

She grabs a bag of clothes for you as you clamber back to the room to change. You're wearing a white shirt with the word "Bride" across the front and "Mrs. Seresin" on the back. She's picked out some black athletic shirts for you. You tie your hair into a ponytail and slide on some tennis shoes.

When you go back to the living room to ask her if you need to back a bag, Savannah happily presents you with a mini backpack with all of the essentials you will need for the day. You grab your phone and go to kiss Jake goodbye.

"Where are they taking you?" He mumbles, still half asleep.

"Disneyland." You tell him. "Have fun." He says before kissing you and rolling back over.

Phoenix ushers everyone out as you lock the door. You're on the road five minutes earlier than planned, which makes her happy.

You settle into the passengers seat and turn on a playlist of Disney songs before turning to Savannah.

"Wait, where are Carter and Sloan?" You ask her.

"With their dad and my parents. This is an adult girls day, and I don't think any of us watch to chase around kids. Plus, we are taking them right after Christmas. So it's a kid free, stress free day." She informs you.

"Well, okay then." You laugh as the SUV rolls down the highway.

The minute you get to the park, Phoenix puts a set of wedding ears on tour heads and straps a magic band to your wrist. She goes over the plan for the day with everyone. She has pulled out all the stops to make sure you maximize your time.

The four of you have an amazing day in the park. Meeting characters, eating all the Mickey shaped things, indulging in a few day drinks, and riding all the rides.

By the time you leave, you are all thoughrly exhausted but happy.

For their final surprise of the evening, you learn that the four of you are staying in the Grand Californian for the night and having a spa day the next day before returning for the rehearsal dinner tomorrow evening.

All of you tumble into bed with smiles on your faces.

After getting pamper and wedding ready, the four of you made it back home with a few hours to spare.

You were so excited telling Jake about your trip and everything you did. He loved the way your eyes lit up when you told him about it.

......................

Much to your surprise, the rehearsal dinner went off without a hitch. Everything ran smoothly as the wedding party ran through the movements and motions in preparation for the big day tomorrow.

The only part that bothered you, was the fact that you were walking down the aisle alone.

You were never in one place for long enough to have a family, so there was no one you could ask.

Maverick and Jake Sr. had both offered, but it just didn't seem right.

The only person who made sense was Rooster. He was the closest thing to family you had. You'd known him for most of your adult life, and he was like a brother to you. But he was one of Jake's groomsmen, so he was out of the question to.

You did your best not to let that put a damper on your mood. Everything would be okay.

Tomorrow you were going to marry the love of your life.

Tomorrow, you were going to be Mrs. Seresin.

So, I lied babes, there us at least one more part after this. There is still so much more I want to include!

Tag List: @pisupsala @shanimallina87 @luckyladycreator2 @mak-32 @katieshook02 @samhapner6 @rosiahills22 @thedroneranger @roosterforme @arson-tm @sebsxphia @potato-girl99981 @caitsymichelle13 @lillyrosenight @callsign-hummingbird @hecate-steps-on-me @writeroutoftime @afterglowsb-tch13 @heyoimjordy @phoenixssugarbaby @hypatia93 @bradshawseresinbabe @je-suis-prest-rachel @teacupsandtopgun @boringusername3 @starlightstories @daggerspare-standingby @utterlyhopeful-fics @talkfastromance4 @fighterpilothoe @t-nd-rfoot @phoenix1388 @abaker74 @gigisimsonmars @emorychase @Ok-denice @greatszu @shawnsblue @angelbabyange @sadpetalsstuff @softmullet @cowboybarbie @shewritesfiction13 @sweetlittlegingy @rogersbarnesxx @rintheemolion @startrekfangirl2233 @soulmates8 @xoxabs88xox

[patronsaintofmath]

went on an evening stroll w old man daniel today. the drive to the trail was fun! i had never gone passed friant on that freeway but everything was so beautiful, i was seeing areas I had never seen before, & there were hardly any cars. it reminded me of how fun driving can be. i was even giggling to myself! anyways i get to the bridge near the start of the trail & i parked under the freeway. i know that if my brother were to retell this story he would make it sound scary bc old man daniel told me to go under the freeway & to just follow it on foot. anyways, he was there w his dogs & his dogs liked me! they got my sweater dirty though. well, actually it’s ariana’s sweater but i have it. i don’t plan on returning it bc it’s the only article of clothing i have of hers. side note: one time when she slept over she didn’t have pijama so i gave her one of my home shirts. it was a dr pepper shirt i had but i didn’t wear it out bc it was super baggy on me. she left w it on & one time i remember i saw her either on ft or post on her story wearing the shirt & i was like :’)))). anyways, the dogs were all dirty & they got the sweater dirty. so, we went down this trail. there was a river & omd was telling me about all the types of animals that are there like coyotes, beavers, deer, raccoons, king snakes, gophers, etc. we did see some deer! it was late in the evening so it was a bit chilly & the sun was setting it was nice but i’ve seen cooler sunsets. we passed by some bee hives & he opened up one of those bee boxes & we got to see a bunch of bees just hanging out. he was telling me all about that land, stories of when he went to mexico, stories about his dogs, stories about knowing when to pick a fight, & so much i recorded it all on my phone. mans ain’t got a lot of years left & my memory isn’t sharp so i wanna make sure i can save this. he got me a handmade & hand painted mushroom decoration. what makes it even cooler is that it was made by an ex-convict. i didn’t want to go empty handed either so before we met i went to vitamin shoppe & got us some space tea which has mushrooms in it & i was like oh man ima try these w omd. granted i had already tried it before but i got different flavors this time. it was so peaceful. as we were walking back to the cars, we saw three deers. 1 buck & 2 does. i would like to add that he also invited neil the fs prof. that dude is pretty laid back. i think omd invited him too bc they’re friends yeah but also like a safety thing for him & for me yknow. but neil the prof couldn’t go bc he was taking care of his dog. also, i played back the recording rn & it kept rubbing against my pocket so you can’t really hear anything. biggest bruh moment. oh well. still just really appreciated being able to hang w grandpa daniel & be active for an hour. as we each went to our cars, he was faster to leave than i was bc he parked like fifty feet closer to the entrance of the trail. he LEFT w out making sure i was even in my truck safely LIKE BRO IT IS DARK & LONELY OUT HERE WAIT FOR ME WHAT IF MY TRUCK DIDNT START??? but it did everything was fine actually. i think he was just cold & wanted to leave. understandable. nah but yeah aside from that it was a cool evening.

[messedupessy]

Ok so, got a ask from @matronofthevoid for the ask thingie I am doing, where she asked what my skeleton boys would be dressed up for Halloween, and I got hella lot of boys and this is hella long so decided to make a separate post with it yes xD 

I am skipping the seafell and seaswapfell bros, also the genderbent versions of them seaswap boys aka Bon and Nessie, as I srsly dunno what they would be pft, but let’s see...

Swap bros: Stretch I can’t say as that will be spoilers for the Halloween pic I got pft, but his bro Berry totally a sexy fireman just because he can, he gotta be matching his bro because that’s the way they roll.

UT bros: know this has been done before but Sans is dressed in a suit with a note stuck onto his chest with the word apology on it, yes he is a formal apology and Puffy if you read this yes this is inspired by your pic from ages ago. Papyrus is dressed up as Mettaton obviously, his box form that is, which he has worked weeks on perfecting! He technically could had just went with his old armor since that was a old costume he made before reaching the surface, but since he worn it so much it was time for a change, and what better than his favourite sexy rectangle?

Fell bros: Edge, if he isn’t too busy, which he might be unless someone drags him away from his work, is dressed up as Gomez Addams, there is no other costume he could possibly wear. Red is a lazy helicopter tomato who don’t really do the whole dressing up shit, so he will just put a pair of devils horns on his head and call it a day.  

SF bros: Scratch has worked like a mad lad on his costume, it is all made from... well scratch, and he has worked on it for literal weeks, a fancy af gothic vampire with a fluffy skirt, lace, buttons, ribbons, so many details, got like claw gauntlets and everything, it looks like some sort of cosplay with how detailed it is but it’s just a costume and he is very proud of it. Rus is dressed up as a literal trashbag, he just got a stinky old paper bag from the trash and poked some holes in it, put it over his head like the trash he is. 

Seaswap bros: Pass is a ninja because it is ironic as fuck, because Pirates VS Ninjas baby. Boney is dressed as the painting “the girl with a pearl earring”, with his own little twist to the rest of the outfit since you can only see the top half of her body. 

3in1Tale aka G bros: you would think Fraktur would dress up as Dr. Frankenstein since he is a mad scientist just like him, but no, Dr. Frankenstein is a sniveling little piss baby, the creature on the other hand, now that’s where the good stuff is, so yes he is dressed up as “Frankensteins monster”, though mixed with a scientist bc he can’t let go off his mad scientist aesthetic. Gans is dressed like that meme the “how do you do fellow kids” one, not on purpose though he was aiming for a skater because skating is cool, it’s hip, sadly he can’t skate to save his life.

SF KH/Purple bros: Mauve is too busy been aggressive and feral to dress up, dressing up in costumes and such things are beneath him. Cash dresses up as a drug dealer.... which he already is, he is technically not dressing up at all he is genuinely just been himself but “pretending” to be selling drugs, that might be real, is probably real, by opening his hoodie and be all “wanna buy some drugs?”. Their underground to start with isn’t much up to celebrating these sort of occasions.  

MessedUpTale bros: Pop is dressed up as a proper knight, using one of his old armours he used to use back before he ended up underground several hundreds of years ago. Tycoon or just Ty for short, well he is a king so he just switches out his crown for a burger king crown, at first at least, with the help of Pop and some of their friends they end up changing his costume into a literal grandpa, with a beard and everything, because he likes to joke that he is one, so why not dress up as one.  

Underlöst bros: Velvet is dressed up as Lady Gaga from the BLACKPINK music video Sour Candy, the black one with straps and like buckles, with a blonde wig and everything, as BLACKPINK is his fave band and he loves Lady Gaga. Bin couldn’t be bothered to put any sort of effort into any sort of costume, so Velvet had to do it for him, so he dresses him up as a wizard, but a sexy one, sort of, Bin is not really working it like Velvet had hoped but it will do.  

Easeswap bros: Mello is dressed as a cute and very comfy bat, but it’s also like sexy it’s like kinda like a massive hoodie rather that gets cut off at the knees, kinda like a hoodie dress, with bat hears and wings as the hoodie arms, he is very cozy in it. Dex is dressed as a werewolf, as it was the best and simplest thing he could get his hands on, but also like sexy. 

Fellswap Gold bros: Vin sadly did not have time to dress up or even celebrating Halloween whatsoever, his job is extremely demanding and he rarely got any free time, but if he had gotten a chance he would had dressed up as a old time gentleman. Mocha is a bit too socially inept and anxious to go out and celebrate, but his fave online multiplayer game, he dressed his character up as a punkish pumpkin man. 

Easefell bros: Thyme procrastinated af on his costume, so he ended up having to buy something simple to dress up as, and ended up as Raphael from TMNT, it’s kinda shitty and bad quality but it works. Pepper haven’t really gotten a chance to dress up properly before, yes he have once or twice dressed up for parties when he was more in his teen years but they used to be like not that good and... very slutty. He was tempted to just go with a pair of bunny ears and call it a day as he don’t have time for this, but ends up going with something more proper anyway, and dresses up as Sandy from Grease, the black outfit she wears at the end. 

[drunk-onsunlight]

Day #1: Beautiful, what's your hurry? 

Chapters: 1/12 Fandom: Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Michelle Jones & Peter Parker, Michelle Jones & Ned Leeds & Peter Parker, Happy Hogan/May Parker (Spider-Man), Pepper Potts & Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Morgan Stark (Marvel Cinematic Universe), spideychelle - Relationship, Betty Brant & Ned Leeds Characters: Michelle Jones, Peter Parker, Ned Leeds, Betty Brant, May Parker (Spider-Man), Tony Stark, Pepper Potts, Happy Hogan, Morgan Stark (Marvel Cinematic Universe) Additional Tags: Spideychelle Promptmas 2020, MJ is Black Cat, Peter Parker is Spider-Man, Iron Dad, Canon? Don't Know Her, Comic Elements, Rhino is causing problems, Prowler is causing problems, Dr. Octopus is causing problems, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Morgan is a smartass, Ned Leeds is a Good Bro, Other Additional Tags to Be Added

Summary:

12 days of promptmas where Peter is having fun being Spider-Man until too many bad guys are around and a certain Cat tries to kiddnap Ned in the middle of a fight (or something like that) and all he can think about is "how is he going to pretend to have a relationship with MJ on that Stark party on Christmas break?"

Notes:

I'm terribly excited and proud of this fic so I hope you have as much fun reading as I had writing it. You will find short chapters and others... not so short, they are hell long (sorry, not sorry). Done with the blablabla and have fun in this 12 Days of Promptmas Remember that every chapter's concept will influence a big plot ;)

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Concept 43. Roommates 2. Shopping

Dialogue 56. "Do you wanna built a snowman?" 46. "You do know that Santa's not real, right?"

December 18th - One week before Christmas Peter and MJ have been living together for two years now. They decided it was the best way to not be totally broke because of their attempt to live in NYC while college and being close to their families in Queens. And the best way for Peter to be Spider-Man and be close to the Avengers facilities without anyone knowing, including MJ. Peter didn't knew how he have managed to keep his identity hidden while living with MJ but it was good, she wasn't in danger if she didn't know about his superhero thing. Peter and MJ had strict rules about their privacy and that made everything easier. They never went to the others bedrooms for anything, at least one of them was sick and that wasn't happening frequently. So basically Peter charged his IronSpider suit without worrying about MJ finding it and probably friking out and his three different suits were on the closet or under his bed totally save. MJ had her own secrets and he wasn't the right person to sneak a peek inside her room to find out, so he respected her room, privacy and secrets as much as she respected his. Morgan has called on a Thursday claiming that she needed to spend time with his big brother on Christmas break or she will take him out of work from The Bugle on some fake news that Spider-Man was around a shopping mall she wanted to visit. The ten year old was very persistent, just like her parents. Of course he said yes, he wanted to take some pictures of Manhattan while you can still walk around Central Park, also, some early shopping for Christmas was too perfect to reject. Morgan arrived to MJ and Peter's apartment early in the morning and took a second quick breakfast with her brother and MJ. ---------

"So, Morgan! How's school going?" MJ was familiar now with the little girl and wasn't surprised of Peter's contacts with the Stark. What she never understood was how Peter ended up working for J. Jonah Jameson and not in Stark Industries, maybe his passion for photography was bigger than his love for chemistry and labs. "Pretty good, actually! I'm looking forward to High school, looks exciting" oh poor innocent soul. But she wasn't going to break her little bubble of happiness, definitely not on the holidays! "You're getting old Morgan! High school? That's big!" Peter was always cheering Morgan, no matter what. He was such a good old brother "Then you are even more old because you are in college and you have a job, too" Morgan said with her mouth full of pancakes, that MJ was pretty sure Pepper will not approve. "MJ! You are gonna let her treat us like grannies because we have a job?" Peter always tried to get MJ involved in his conversations but she still had that little observant in her from High school "Well, if we are that old then we can't go shopping today. What if we get a cold? That would be terrible for this two old people" that was the plan, shopping with Morgan but MJ had another plan for her visit to Manhattan, but they didn't need that information "noooo!!!! We have to go shopping! My dad gave me lots of money to spend on everyone’s present! I want to buy something nice for Uncle Happy and Aunt May, for mom and dad and of course for you both! Even for Ned and Betty!" yes, that was their little group now. How on earth Peter was able to keep such a strong relationship with the Starks and his security head, after two years working for their labs, was still a mystery. Well, it wasn't hard to get attached to the Parkers and with Peter always came Ned and now Betty. "Ok Morgan! Then let's go. If we are in Manhattan as soon as the shops are open we will get good presents for everyone" the little girl took her plate when the pancakes were to the kitchen and run to get her coat, scarf and gloves for the cold. "How much money do you think she actually has, Parker?" "She is ten, so maybe not much. But she is a Stark so maybe a couple hundred? Who knows? I'm gonna text Pepper just to check, if I text Tony he will probably encourage her to buy the whole shopping mall" Peter walked to his room while Morgan returned from the living room and started jumping in front on MJ to show her that she was ready to go "Ok, we will go in a few. Can you go to your brother's room for a bit while I look for my things?" "Yeap! Don't take long, MJ!" "Don't worry. I will be fast. Promise!" MJ walked to her room and locked the door. She needed to change something from her outfit without Peter and Morgan knowing. That will bring lots of questions that she wasn't ready to answer, especially to Peter. She took her bag with all the things she needed for the day and checked twice that the leather suit under her clothes wasn't visible. "MJ is back!! We can go! Let's go Pete" Morgan was bubbling with happiness so they finally went out of the little apartment. They went down the five floors and started walking through the cold streets of New York with Morgan in between them. Each holding one of her tiny hands. The girl was talking about her school friends, her new favorite topic in class and her love for science, just like his dad. Peter and Morgan were having a lovely chat about the new tech Stark was designing while MJ was waiting for her moment to leave them for a while. "How do you know all of this, Morgan? Pepper hasn't forbid you from the labs?" "Yeah, but she stopped telling me to not go there after my tenth time sneaking into the labs." "As reasonable as your dad, I see" "And you Pete. That's why you are my brother" Peter had an easy smile on his face when he talked to Morgan. It was nice to see him so relaxed, he was extremely stressed and had been for the last year. College could be a nightmare even being a genius like Peter. "Ammm, I have to go Morgan. Would you forgive me if I go for a few minutes? I promise I will be back" "Nooo!!! Why? I can talk to you more if you want. It’s just that Peter never shuts up" "Its fine Morgan. I love hearing you both talk about nerdy things, but can I tell you a secret?" the girl’s eyes light up and she moved away a little from Peter "I'm very good at keeping secrets, MJ. You can trust me" MJ got to Morgan’s level which means she was almost on her knees. "I'm going to buy Peter's present and he can't see it because it's a surprise. Can you keep that secret?" Morgan's face showed all her excitement and started nodding furiously "Then I will text Peter when I'm done, ok?" she said the last looking at Peter to let him know she was going back with them "Ok! See you MJ!!" Morgan waved at MJ while she crossed the street to a few jewelry stores. She entered one of the stores and checked that Peter and Morgan were gone before leaving to a close ally to change into her leather suit, mask and silver wig. ------ "MJ is really nice. And pretty!" if Peter never closed his mouth, Morgan was just like him, but Peter loved it "Yeah. She is really nice" "And pretty. My dad said he is a little bit afraid of her for all your stories about her in high school but I think that makes her even greater" "Well yes, she is pretty and why I never knew your dad was afraid of MJ? Now I'm gonna mock him for that" "you didn't hear it from me, Pete" "so, what where you and MJ talking about?" "No, no, it's a secret and I don't share secrets even if there are small. Like your secret, does MJ knows, by the way?" "No, she doesn't and you know that's the best thing for her so it's going to be a secret until something terrible happens like she gets in my room and I'm arriving from patrol or something like that" he didn't want to think about the possibility of MJ finding out about him being Spider-Man because patrol ended bad "How's Ned doing? Is he still your Guy in the Chair?" "Nop, he is retired. Now he has proclaimed himself as a FOS" "what's that?" "FOS as Friend of Spider-Man" "so, I'm a FOS too, right?"

"Yes, you are Morgan. That's why you have to be really careful on not speaking about Spidey outside of the labs or the facilities. Ok?" "Yeap. Got it. Don't worry about that. Mom thought me well. She talked about a few bad experiences she had because she is close to my dad and I don't want to go through any of that" Morgan was very young but very intelligent, any other kid would be screaming at the top of their lungs that their adoptive brother was a superhero just like their dad. But she knew better than that. "Hey! Look at all the snow in the park. Do you wanna built a snowman, Morgan?!" he was very excited about the possibility but Morgan not so much "I would love it but can we wait for MJ? I think she will enjoy it as much as we will" "Ok. Let me check my phone for any messages. Maybe she wrote me and we didn't notice" no new messages from MJ, but apparently Black Cat had stolen a few things from a store on the opposite side of Manhattan. The police was taking care of the case but the evidence wasn't much. They never had enough evidence when Black Cat was involved, she was becoming a problem in New York and Peter was going to pay more attention to the new dressed up villain, but first he needed to stop Rhino. He was the big problem, has been for the last year, appearing and disappearing every few months but each time he came back, he was stronger. "Did she say something?" "No yet. What if we go to that shopping mall, do some actual shopping and then back to that snowman?" "Yes! I want to buy some summer clothes to my dad and some beautiful heels to my mom! Maybe some kitchen utensils to Uncle Happy and more nice shoes for Aunt May! What do you think, Pete?" "I think we have lots of things to do then! Let's go before MJ is back. We need to buy her a present too" they walked to the shopping mall and got a few things for everyone. Morgan bought some shorts for Tony, with Iron Man's face on them, some really expensive heels for Pepper and May and different bakery supplies for Happy "I have Ned's present in Stark Industries. It's a new program my dad worked on that I think he will love. But don't tell him! It's a secret" "don't worry peanut, your secret it's save with me" "thanks Pete. Ok, what are we buying to MJ?" "I have an idea... But we have to go find somewhere affordable and that can sell me a very specific object. Santa can't bring that present from the North Pole for her" "You do know that Santa's not real, right?" "What? MORGAN! You can't say that!!" "I'm sorry Pete. Did I ruin your fantasy?" "No... But now that's a big secret you will have to keep. No one can know that Santa is not real" after Peter and Morgan went out of the store they choose for MJ's present, Peter's phone started to sound along to Jingle Bells. "Hey MJ. We done shopping here. Where are you? Do you wanna built a snowman?" "A snowman?" "Yes. Morgan wanted to wait for you to build it in the park a few block away from where we were" "Oh. Yeah. I know where, see you there in ten?" "Perfect. See you in a few" "She's coming to build the snowman?" "Yes she is" "I really like MJ, Peter" "Yeah. Me too" -----

After a small walk and some time to find the best place to build the snowman, MJ, Peter and Morgan reunited and started looking for things to complete the medium sized snowballs that they managed to make. Morgan found a few stones for the eyes, MJ took a few branches for the arms and Peter was trying to find something for the nose of the snowman. After a few minutes he found a branch that wasn't to tin as the snowman's arms but it was too long. He broke the branch in the thicker part and placed it in the snowman face. "Oh Peter! The gym is actually paying! You broke that like it was a pencil!" Morgan’s face screamed at him that that action wasn’t completely normal for a regular person "Yeeaaahhh... The, the gym! Of course!" MJ was looking at him a little bit suspicious. She still managed to hide most her emotions but after living with her, Peter learned to read her more than she thought. "Well, I need to start going to the gym too then, you have been going since high school and it's finally working apparently" Peter knew MJ wasn't stupid, or blind for the matter. She has seen him without a shirt and knew about how his body has changed through the years because of his superhero thing, but for her, and everyone else... He was just going to the gym. That was the logic explanation behind his ripped body and his very useful strength. Peter tried to move away from MJ’s suspicious face while lifting Morgan from the ground.

“I think it’s quite decent. What do you think, Em?” Peter asked MJ

“I don’t look that bad, actually! Morgan, can you rate the snowman?” They were looking at the weird snowballs with the stones for eyes and several branches around his “body”

“I give it a 7 out of 10, something is missing… A SCARF!!! He’s getting cold without a scarf” Ok, Santa wasn’t real but the snowman was getting cold. Peter and MJ shared a look and started laughing, they found funny that the snowballs were cold. Peter took his scarf off from around his neck and placed it on between the top snowball and the middle one.

“There you have it! Now he is fine and won’t get a cold” Morgan looked pleased at the snowman and took MJ’s hand in her right hand and she offered her left had to Peter.

“Ok, now it’s a ten. I think we can go and wrap all this presents on the apartment. Can we Peter?” Morgan looked a little tired

“We definitely should, maybe we can have some hot drink too” MJ wrapped her bag on her shoulder without letting go of Morgan’s hand while Peter took the six different bags from around the snowman and the three of them stared to head home.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thanks to @spiderman-homecomeme for organising this amazing event!

[watchmebitch]

character development, team dynamics, and other shit that was handled badly in avengers endgame

So, here’s my biggest beef with endgame: the movie runs for 20 minutes with the characters we know, then time skips 5 years ahead and changes everyone unconvincingly so that you have to spend the remaining 2hr40m watching extremely different people, to whom you don’t have the same emotional attachment.

The five year time jump is an easy cop-out way for the directors to be like “no no see [weird OOC nonsense] happened bc they Changed,” but you, as the audience, are forced to just accept this without being shown how any of the characters got from point A to point B. For example:

Point A: Hawkeye loses his family. 

Point B: Rampage in Japan, for some reason. 

Point A: Thor is too late killing Thanos. 

Point B: A coping mechanism we’ve literally never seen from Thor before, even though he’s lost loved ones and failed a million times at this point. Him failing/losing literally everything and redeeming himself was the entire plot of Thor 1, but whatever. 

Point A: Tony still holds every grudge he accumulated in previous movies, lashes out at the whole team for collectively losing.

Point B: Tony settles down with Pepper for long enough to have and raise a child, even though he’s been pathologically unable to do that in every previous movie and always, immediately picks up a new project/finds a new problem.

But meanwhile, because they needed to have a bunch of blatant callbacks to previous movies to pander to the audience (up to and including characters shot-for-shot repeating their old lines) everybody ends up looking like a funhouse mirror version of themselves instead of a New Person. Because the main elements the writers needed to keep in order to not make everyone leave the theater are still there.

And in all of this, inexplicably, even though these people are all obviously traumatized by everything that’s happened and seemingly need to make sure the world is recovering OK, they mostly go their separate ways during the 5 years, without explanation. This is dumb for in-universe reasons but, more importantly, literally all anyone has ever wanted out of an avengers movie was uncomplicated team bonding & support systems being developed between these morons.

But we can’t even have that. Instead, the writers need to create half baked families for our heroes to fridge or risk fridging to show that they have Something to Lose or Lost Something, which itself is ridiculous when the team is right there. 

And it’s been nearly ten years since Civil War at the point in the timeline where most of the film runs, so don’t come at me with that. If real life moderate liberals can forgive George Bush in ten years after being presented with a Bigger Bad (yikes, by the way), Tony Stark can get over his friends not signing away their civil rights after coming face to face with a problem that the Accords would not, under any circumstances, have solved.

But wait, there’s more! 

Why no team bonding? Well I’ll tell you why. Joss Whedon (can’t believe I’m saying this) started us on that path with the end of a1, showing a version of the team that sets aside their differences and gets along at the end of the day, at least for long enough to save each other’s asses or share a meal when the dust settles.

-on the contrary the Russo bros just dusted everyone--

He fleshed this out in Age of Ultron by giving us some of the ONLY good scenes in a2: the team hanging out together and throwing parties in their down time.

But Joss also made a dangerous discovery. He paired Nat (at first, the only female avenger) off with Bruce for reasons that I will never be able to explain, and in doing that sent a shocking realization through the core of the marvel writing staff: if your big superhero team only has one girl on it, the fanbase is going to start pairing up the boys.

The thing is, the longer the team maintains a fun found-family dynamic, where they hang out like friends and share meals while not getting married to other people, the more it starts to look exactly like that.

Which Disney is terrified of, as we know. Can’t rake in the big bucks while pandering to the gays.  ignore all of the highly successful gay pandering out there-

So they do two things. (1) They start introducing avengers that have a good reason to keep their distance (Dr. Strange), so as to not make this even more blatant, and (2) they start introducing avengers who already have full fledged families (Ant-Man) and are therefore Proven Hetero for the audience.

Our buddy joss started this mess in a2 by giving Clint a secret family, ostensibly because he realized that everyone in the fanbase would be extremely confused why Natasha and Bruce would be together when Clint’s right there. But even the secret family didn’t feel real or convincing, because it came completely out of nowhere and - I cannot stress this enough - Hawkeye was still hanging out with the avengers 24/7 as far as we know at this time. He wasn’t going missing from group movies yet, and he was at the fun parties and hang-out scenes in a2. So his family ends up looking more like a weird 1950s closet cover set-up in a2, even though Clint is one of the few avengers that the fanbase actually likes to ship with women.

In Conclusion: The drop in quality of the Avengers Movies and compulsory heterosexuality share a direct relationship. The Russo Bros managed to write a movie that simultaneously (1) eviscerates everyone’s favorite characters (namely, all of them) but (2) panders just enough to the audience with catchphrases and nostalgic callbacks to prevent an uprising. Joss Whedon opened pandora’s box in 2015 when he wrote Hawkeye’s family into existence and smashed Bruce and Nat together like barbie dolls. I could have written a better movie in a cave with a box of scraps.

[meshkol]

Twitter Threads (or That One Time Tony Dialled It Up to Eleven)

Summary: Social media is hard and full of trolls, and Tony has poor impulse control.

Notes: I hate this so much. Less cracky than I wanted it, because I suck at writing humour. Fill K-3 for the Tony Stark Bingo 2019: Gossip Press. Unbeta'd as per usual. Any relation to existing twitter handles is entirely coincidental.

Warnings: Social Media, Twitter, Homophobic Language, Sexist Language, Ableist Language, Internet, Trolls, Protective Tony Stark, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Goes On A Rampage

No one can say that Tony’s ever had good impulse control, especially about people he loves.

@1234ideclareathumbwar posted: I donno what it is about dr strange but he must suck dick like a pro if hes got iron man whipped god knows theres nothing attractive about him except those dick suckin lips #drstrange #ironman #wtfisstarkthinking

 @100percentDONE-xxx replied: yeah its not like he can give a decent handjob ffs must me the lips or maybe hes just tight every1 knows stark loves a tight whole hes prolly cheating neway poor cripple

 @itsawrapandimreadytoparty replied: Probably just lays there and thinks about the wizard gods just to get that $$$...I’d think of England even for a nymphomaniac drug-addicted sugar daddy too, tbh.

 @BlessYouThor-ness replied: still can’t believe he chose strange over THOR like everyone can see the chemistry between them and tony is such a bottom he’d take thor’s cock so well fuck yes

 @they-did-the-thing777 replied: is it just me or does strange look like an alien maybe there’s no magic at all just aliens and he’s got a tentacle dick and stark just wants to mark off another box on his worlds-biggest-slut checklist #tonystarkispathetic

 @snowflakes_makeme_lol replied: hes just fkn ugly i s2g stark id spread 4 but strange??? that bitch be ugly asf n not worth gettin my dk wet prolly get aids

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: You guys are the pinnacle of our evolution and I am in awe of your genuine kindness and polite generosity (and grammar). Wow, I can’t believe Stephen Strange saved all of your jerkass lives TWICE for this shit and you know what? Everyone knows I’M the cocksucker in this relationship, dumbfucks.

 @kiki_blow_this_popsicle_stand replied: HOLY SHIT LMAO

“What are you doing?”

He doesn’t bother looking up from his tablet, backing away from that thread because he has no interest in seeing the replies, and hunting for the next war he can wage. “Destressing,” he replies gleefully, clicking on a thread that mentions Pepper. He can feel Rhodey behind him – and, what’s more, he can feel the disapproval seeping out of his pores too now that he’s peeking over Tony’s shoulder – but he’s on a roll, and fuck impulse control when he can sass and bitch on twitter. Some people just need to be removed from the genetic pool of the human race and not be allowed to procreate, honestly.

Somewhere in bumbfuck-nowhere, Fury is having a coronary and Stephen is rolling his eyes so hard they’re permanently lodged in his cranium.

@rudethatyoureallamatwink posted: Does anyone else think that Pepper Potts only got the job at Stark because she’s got awesome legs and a great twat and Tony Stark wanted to stick his dick in? #idfuckher #pepperpotts #starkindustries #idfuckhimtootbh #tonystark

 @MyNameIsGoFuckYourself replied: lol ur gross shes like 35 or smth but wvr u want crusty ol lose pussy u do u bro #oldchickgross #getbotox

 @shredderinmymetal3-14 replied: @MyNameIsGoFuckYourself lmao wtf?? He started fucking her when she was like twenty or something so she was still nice and tight back then. I mean I’d still fuck her right now cause she’s one hot cougar and I bet she’s learned a thing or two from the Slut Extraordinaire. And anyway, how tf do you know what her cunt’s like?? The only hole you’ve fucked is your mom.

 @queeen-bee-says-hi replied: Wow, you guys are pigs. Pepper Potts is a strong, independent, beautiful woman who is worth a thousand of all you, and your mothers would be ashamed of you all.

 @gags_are_the_best_fight_me_bitch replied: @queeen-bee-says-hi hey look theres the feminazi if you want i can replace that stick up your pussy with my dick you know you need it ill fuck you real good show you what a real mans like

 @truthisanillusion replied: I’ll fuck @queeen-bee-says-hi AND @OfficialPotts_CEO at the same time fucking feminazi cunts, god knows you bitches would be grateful for my prick in your gaping lesbian pussies

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: Wow. So. Uh.

1. That’s revolting and my AI just delivered the IPs of @gags_are_the_best_fight_me and @truthisanillusion to the authorities for premeditated violence, rape, and hate crimes. You’re welcome, and feel free to send a cash donation to the charity of your choice for my thoughtfulness. I’d recommend something for women’s or LGBTQ+ rights, and I’ll match it with a multiplier of 1000x.

2. @queeen-bee-says-hi, good for you, and I can see from your profile that you’re a student. Consider your crops watered and your schooling paid for, all the way to your twelfth PhD if you want it.

3. @OfficialPotts_CEO can and will murder you with her pinky nail. I’ve taken on Thanos and I’d rather go ten rounds with him than piss her off. THAT’S why she’s CEO, not because of her admittedly awesome legs.

4. I hate this hellsite. If I buy it, can I kill it?? Rhodey says “technically” so I’m gonna look into that now.

 @i_stan_one_legend_named_virginia_p_potts replied: IRON MANNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!! DEFEND THE QUEEN!!!!!!!!!!! #PEPPERPOTTS4PRESIDENT

 @iaminlovewithcapandimunashamed replied: lmfao incels be fkd when #ironman comes to town

 @truthisanillusion replied: Hey @YouKnowWhoIAm No one trusts you or likes you, you fake ass super “hero” taking it up the ass like a faggot stfu and die already, kthxbye

 @queeen-bee-says-hi replied: whAT OH MY GOD THAT IS NOT NECESSARY

 @OfficialPotts_CEO replied: Tony, stop picking fights and threatening to buy twitter or I’ll ground you. And just accept the gift, @queeen-bee-says-hi - after all, he’s already done it.

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: Shut up Pepper, you aren’t the boss of me.

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: And jokes on you @truthisanillusion because I’m already dead inside come at me bitch I’ll be the one in the multi-billion-dollar suit of armor surrounded by Avengers

 @OfficialPotts_CEO replied: Actually, I am. Don’t make me take away your toys. Or call @Sorcerer_Supreme_With_A_Scalpel. He’s on speed-dial, sweetheart, and he likes me better than you.

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: Rude.

 @Sorcerer_Surpreme_With_A_Scalpel replied: The last time you threatened someone, your house got blown up. Please refrain from egging on internet trolls or I’ll dump you for Rhodes for my own sanity.

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: ALSO RUDE.

“You know, I’m not even remotely bi-curious and I would totally tap that,” Rhodey says absently, though his lips are quirking into a smirk.

Tony rolls his eyes. “Hands off, you little shit, or I’ll tweet about that one time in MIT when you ate that—”

“Fuck you.”

“Been there, done that,” Tony quips cheerfully. “Not remotely bi-curious my ass—”

“You know what’s better than picking fights with twelve-year-olds on twitter? Kicking your ass right here. You come at me, Stank.”

Tony opens his mouth to reply but then gasps, already losing himself in another thread after sending a middle finger emoji into the last one.

@mwahahaha-666 posted: You guys can wax poetry about Tony Stark all you want, but screw that basic-ass rich boy - everyone knows Doctor Strange is the smokin’ hot one. #takemenow #mybodyisready #drstrange

 @ukulele_jedi_master replied: PREACH!!! stark may be loaded but stephen is the one that looks like a prada model giMME THAT MAGICAL DICK

 @xxx-foreverfit-xxx replied: Fuck both of you. I just wanna be a fly on the wall when they’re fucking each other...or better yet, DIRECT them on how to ruin each other #ironstrange #otp

 @highpercentageofuselessnessachieved replied: i wonder if he can clone himself like can u imagine?? being fucked from all ends by #drstrange cock?? what i wouldn’t give to be tony stark omfg i don’t even want the money just the hard dickin from that fine piece of ass

 @its_a_fact_that_captain_america_has_a_big_dick replied: He’s got Iron Man wrapped around his little finger so he must have the biggest dick and the know-how to use it properly. Yes pls and thank you very much, I’ll take that monster dick pronto.

 @TGBYHN_4_LYFE replied: dude i tell u what i would do what @xxx-foreverfit-xxx said: sit in the corner w a ridign crop in 9’’ stilettos rubbin myself while directing them 2 do what i want...make em touch n stroke n suck n bite n fuck each other til they cant walk anymore n then cuddle w them n stroke their hair

 @catcatcatcat-cat replied: I would give my college education, my life, my cow, and my internet access away for the rest of my life for a sex tape

 @xxx-foreverfit-xxx replied: @TGBYHN_4_LYFE omfg fuCK YES CAN YOU IMAGINE listening to them moan as they lost themselves in each oter, so fucking desperate to get off that they’re begging you to let them cum even as they try their hardest to obey, covered in precum and sweat and hot as fuck

 @bigfoot_is_nessie1987 replied: I s2g the amount of fanfiction I write about those two alone should have me committed but I literally can’t stop the two of them are so fucking hot together that it should be illegal god bless Iron Man and Dr Strange and their sexy, sexy chemistry and sexy, sexy bodies #killme

 @one-upon-a-time-in-asgard2 replied: They are the hottest couple in the history of the universe and so fucking pure I love them both so much also @bigfoot_is_nessie1987 I demand a link to your fics cuz I’m always looking for more ironstrange porn #otp #ironstrange

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: @Sorcerer_Supreme_With_A_Scalpel Hey, they think you have a big dick. Little do they know that they’re totally right and that you also have the added bonus of actually BEING a big dick too! #dontthreatentoleavemeforplatypus #orilltagyouinthirstposts #awesomethirstposts #stephenhasabigdick #andiloveit #goodshit

 @mwahahaha-666 replied: OH MY DUCKING GOD

 @its_a_fact_that_captain_america_has_a_big_dick replied: Well, I’d be mortified that Tony Stark is replying to this except Tony Stark is acTUALLY REPLYING TO THIS BLESS YOU IRON MAN

 @Sorcerer_Supreme_With_A_Scalpel replied: One of these days I’m going to murder you with your own bravado and not lose a night’s sleep over it. And fine, I won’t touch Rhodes...I’m sure Rogers is free anyway, and he’s always so polite when I visit.

 @bigfoot_is_nessie1987 replied: Please don’t read my fanfiction I will literally combust in embarrassment also I am dying over here in Copenhagen omfg

 @YouKnowWhoIAm replied: BRO CODE, DUDE. YOU’RE VIOLATING THE BRO CODE. I HATE YOU SO MUCH AND I WANT A DIVORCE.

 @catcatcatcat-cat replied: ...oh my god what does that mean you guys are MARRIED??!?! BLESS THE WIZARD GODS!!!!

 @Sorcerer_Supreme_With_A_Scalpel replied: Rhodes, I know you’re reading over his shoulder, so if you could please take away his phone now before he ends up on the cover of the Times...or breaks the internet. Again. Thank you in advance.

Tony reacts immediately, trying to make a break for it, but Rhodey’s already tackling him into the couch, a hundred and ninety pounds of lean muscle and pretty Class As. Tony hisses breathlessly, the wind knocked out of him, and he struggles valiantly to keep his hands on his tablet while Rhodey does his best to rip it away. He doesn’t have a very good position so he makes a hair-brained, split-second decision to throw his body weight to the side, making them both roll off the couch. Rhodey’s a jerk though, and manages to react fast enough so that Tony takes the brunt of the impact, and he can’t even help but groan in a mixture of mild pain and disappointment as he feels the tablet being removed from his lax fingers.

“Sucks to be you, Stank,” he says breathlessly, fingers flying over the keyboard, and Tony cranes his neck until he can read Rhodey’s reply (and on Tony’s fucking account what in the hell!):

@YouKnowWhoIAm replied: I think I broke your hot mess of a husband, Stephen. Come collect him before he murders me with his eyes or gets his hands on another electronic device. We’re in the lab.

Three seconds later, Stephen walks through a portal, looking oh-so-fucking-gorgeous in his battle robes, and wearing a scowl of irritation that bodes well for rough, mock-angry sex in the near future.

Tony grins unapologetically, and abandons the lure of social media in exchange for his pseudo husband.

It’s an easy choice.

Also read on ao3.

Feel free to prompt me things on my Bingo Card!

[mischiefandspirits]

Iron Legion (18/?)

Never let it be said that Tony Stark ever does things by half. He might have grown up with little family, but he wasn’t about to keep it that way.

Tony Stark was seventeen when his first child was born, and that was just the beginning.

For Masterpost, Timeline, AO3, and Fanfiction

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Arachne Mark II, Part 1

Tony Stark was forty when Spider-Man was born.

“Hey Petey, how was your first week of school?” Tony asked as Peter came into the living room.

“Great!” he chirped, dropping his backpack before flopping onto the couch next to Tony.

“That’s wonderful,” Pepper said, leaning over to press a kiss to his forehead before heading towards the elevator. “I’ll be back for dinner and then we can hear all about it.”

“Okay, Mom.”

Tony waited until he heard the elevator doors close before giving his son a look. “So, how’d it actually go?”

Peter gave him a confused look.

“Don’t give me that. You know you can’t lie to me.”

Peter groaned and set his head in Tony’s lap. “It was fine.”

“But?”

“It’s nothing, just… Everyone seems to already know each other, either from middle school or because their parents all know each other. And I’m just some weird random homeschool kid who's there on a scholarship and changes in the bathroom stalls instead of the locker room.”

If only they knew, Tony thought as he ruffled his kid’s hair. “Just give it time for that winning personality of yours to kick in. You’ll have tons of friends soon enough.”

“You think so?” Peter asked, looking unconvinced.

“Sure, maybe try joining a club or… I don’t know. I’m not the making friends type. Still not sure why Rhodey’s stuck around this long. He and Pepper would be better at this. Just make sure to be yourself. If they don’t like the real you, then they’re not worth your time. Starks don’t change themselves for anyone.” He could hear Rhodey, Happy, and Pepper calling him a hypocrite in his head, but ignored it. Being a dad was all about do as I say, not as I do.

“Alright, Dad.” Peter sat up and hugged him. “Thanks.”

“Anytime, Kiddo. Now, how about you go put your stuff away and then we test out that new drone I’m making for Wilson?”

Peter perked up. “The bird bot?”

“The bird bot.”

“Yes!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Peter was doodling ideas for improvements on the bird bot when someone tapped his shoulder.

He flipped his notebook closed quickly and looked up to see a pretty older girl standing over him.

“You’re Peter Parker, right?” she asked.

“Uh, yeah, that’s me.”

She smiled and held out her hand. “My name’s Elizabeth Toomes, but everyone calls me Liz. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you,” Peter said, bemused, as he took her hand.

“Can I talk to you for a second? If you’re busy with your project, then we can do it later.”

“Oh, no, it’s fine,” he said, pushing his notebook aside. “I’m just messing around. I finished the project we’re supposed to be working on last week. My last school was a little ahead.” A lie, technically. The Tomorrow Academy hadn’t gone over what the project covered, but Dr. Banner had during one of their science sessions.

His teacher had seemed a little annoyed when he’d told her he’d finished ahead of schedule, as had some of his classmates, but Liz just seemed excited and dropped into the empty seat next to him. “I’m a member of the school’s academic decathlon team. Our captain asked me to invite a few promising freshmen to try out while he’s getting our practices ready and a couple of your teachers recommended you.”

Blushing, he ducked his head. “Th-thank you, but I don’t know anything about academic decathlons.”

She shrugged. “That’s okay, we can teach you how it works as long as you’re smart enough to compete.”

Peter wasn’t sure about the competition part, but his dad and Uncle Rhodey had both suggested he join a school club or team to try to make friends so he nodded. “Uh, sure then. How do I try out?”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Yeah, Ned, I’ll ask Nebs as soon as she gets home,” Peter was saying as he came into the workshop. “Yeah, that sounds great… Uh-huh… Okay, bye!” Peter dropped into a chair and rolled up next to Tony. “Hey, Dad! Guess what happened at school today!”

Tony adjusted the power levels and reran the simulation for the engine he was working on.

“Dad?”

“Jay, save these results.”

“Right away.”

“Dad, what’s wrong?”

“Did you hear something, Jay?”

“I believe it was Master Peter.”

“Who?”

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Peter pout. “Nebs told you.”

Tony continued to ignore him.

“She promised she wouldn’t say anything!”

“Say anything about what? You betraying the entire family?”

Peter rolled his eyes and nudged Tony’s arm. “It’s just a field trip.”

“To Oscorp,” Tony spat, putting as much disgust into the word as he could.

“The entire robotics lab is going. I’d look weird if I don’t go.”

“No, you’d look smart. Oscorp is garbage.”

“Compared to us, sure,” Peter agreed easily, leaning against Tony to see his work. “But they’re still one of the best companies in the world and it’s a big deal to the others that we’re able to tour some of their labs.”

“Osborn’s probably just trying to scrounge up some good PR to combat whatever scandal he’s apart of this time.”

“Yeah,” Peter hummed, reaching out to turn the diagram.

Tony shoved the hand away. “Uh-uh, traitors don’t get to help out in the lab.”

“Dad!”

“There you are,” Nebula said, walking in. “Why were you asking Uncle Happy when I was off?”

Peter spun his chair around to point at her. “You promised you wouldn’t tell him!”

Nebula gave him an unimpressed look. “What does it matter? It’s just some stupid field trip.”

“The triplets would never spew such blasphemy,” Tony muttered.

Nebula shook her head. “Is that all you wanted or can I -”

“Wait!” Peter called as she started to leave. “Ned wants to know if I can come over to his house tomorrow!”

“Ned?” Tony and Nebula asked together.

“He’s in AcaDec and robotics lab with me. He’s a freshman too and last practice we were talking about those old Star Wars movies. He invited me over to watch them.”

Old Star Wars movies, Tony mouthed as Nebula asked, “And why does this concern me?”

“His mom wants to talk to you to make sure it’s okay.”

Tony laughed as his daughter scowled. “You wanted to be responsible for him.”

“Please, Nebs!”

She groaned and turned to leave. “Just give her my number.”

“Thanks, Nebs! You’re the best older sister ever!” F.R.I.D.A.Y. made a sound and Peter said, “Older! You’re still the best sister altogether.”

“Thanks, Baby-Bro!”

“So you’re making friends, then?” Tony asked.

“Well, friend. It’s just Ned. At least, I think he’s my friend.”

Tony shrugged and ruffled his hair. “Barely two months and you’ve already got a maybe friend? Way better than me at your age. Knew you could do it. I’m proud of you.”

Peter beamed. “Even though I’m going on the field trip?”

Tony dropped his hand and turned away. “Jay, did you hear that? It almost sounded like someone was talking.”

Peter pressed his face into Tony’s shoulder with a whine.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two hours into the tour and Peter was honestly just bored.

Nothing Oscorp was working on, or at least nothing they were willing to show his class, was cutting edge. His class was mostly just interested in the equipment the labs were using, but Peter had worked with better while helping his dad or Dr. Banner.

“Dad was right, I should have just bailed,” he sighed, hanging back while his classmates all crowded around the tanks of spiders Oscorp was using for a breeding experiment.

He shivered at just the idea of being that close to the arachnids, behind glass or not.

He glanced around the lab in search of something to focus on before his brain just started tuning everything out and his eyes landed on a display hidden off to the side next to a tank.

Giving the tank a wide berth, he walked over and read off the formula. It seemed to be part of the breeding experiment, but something was familiar about it.

“Please stay with your class.”

Peter jerked to the side, tripping and barely managing to catch himself on the workbench holding the tank. Blushing, he pulled himself upright and turned to see Dr. Connors, Oscorp’s lead genetic biologist. The man had been the one to give them their lecture when they’d reached the bio labs and was now staring down at Peter with a forced smile.

“S-sorry, I was just looking at this formula.”

“It’s beyond you, very advanced. Come back over with the others.”

Peter shook his head. He hated when adults looked down on him. His teachers did it, some of his classmates did it, the Avengers had done it whenever they visited Dr. Banner’s lab while he was there, even Dr. Banner had done it at first. His dad had never done it, though, and he didn’t stand for anyone doing it to Peter or his siblings.

Well, except the twins, sometimes. But only Dad was allowed to tease them, and they knew he was just joking.

“My… uncle taught me about formulas like these years ago.” He pointed at a portion of the formula as he realized what was familiar about it. “Why is Extremis incorporated here?”

Dr. Connors dropped the smile for an annoyed expression. “It isn’t.”

“But I recognize it. My uncle taught me about it.”

“Your uncle must have been mistaken.”

Peter scowled. Dr. Banner was above and beyond Dr. Connors’ level.

“Please return to your class. Now.”

Peter marched over to Ned’s side as the class began to leave for the next part of the tour.

Just as the doors closed behind him, he felt a pinch at the back of his neck. His hand slapped at it reflexively.

“You okay?” Ned asked.

“Yeah, just an itch.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Peter!” Nebula called as she strapped her gun to her hip. “You’re going to be late if you don’t get out here.” She grabbed her badge and jacket, then turned to Peter’s door. “Peter?”

A bit of worry dug at her when she didn’t get a response. She hadn’t seen Peter the night before, but his backpack was on the coat rack so she had assumed he’d gone to bed early for some reason. What if…

Nebula threw open his door and sighed when she saw the fluffy brown hair poking out from under his Iron Man comforter (a gag gift from Uncle Rhodey, Peter had made her swear not to tell Father he actually used it). “Peter?”

He groaned and peaked out of the covers. “Nebs?”

She frowned at his raspy voice, bleary eyes, and flushed face. “You okay?” she asked, coming to his side.

“Tired.” He leaned into her cold skin when she set her hand on his forehead. “Everything’s bright and loud.”

She nodded as her sensors listed a temperature. “You’re running a low fever.”

He flinched and pulled his comforter back over his head.

Considering what he’d said, she quietly moved over to the window and shut the blinds and curtains. Then she went to the bathroom and grabbed some Tylenol and earplugs out of the first aid kit. She brought them into his room with a glass of water and offered them with a small, “Here.”

He peaked out again then took the Tylenol and water.

“I’ll call your school and let them know you’re staying home. Just rest. If I can’t make it back for lunch, I’ll send someone to check on you. Call me or Father if you start feeling nauseous or if anything else starts feeling off.”

He nodded and put the earplugs in before slipping back into his chrysalis.

She gave his side a pat and left for work.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A car honked, a baby cried, someone knocked on a door, someone dropped a glass, another car honked.

So much. Too much.

Peter reached up to make sure the earplugs hadn’t fallen out while he was asleep, but they were still in. They really weren’t helping much, but he figured something was better than nothing.

He pulled his blanket down and squinted as the light hit his eyes. He wanted to tug it back up, but his stomach was killing him. Maybe Nebs would be back soon?

Sitting up a little, he reached out for his glasses so he could check the time. He paused when he spotted his glasses next to the alarm clock.

The alarm clock that he could easily read.

He looked around his room and was shocked to find he could see everything perfectly, once he pushed past how bright everything was. For so long he’d never been able to see more than a foot in front of his face, yet now everything was crystal clear. Better than, really. Even his glasses had never let him see everything with such detail.

He rubbed his eyes, but the only thing that did was help his eyes adjust to the light a little.

His stomach gave a loud gurgle and cramped, reminding him of his hunger.

Shoving aside his weird eye thing for now, he checked the time and pouted when it showed it was only half-past ten.

Hissing, he slipped out of bed. The ache throbbing through his body briefly grew in his legs as they took his weight and rippled through the rest of him. Once it dulled, he shuffled over to his desk and grabbed his sunglasses. They made everything blurry as his miraculously healed eyes tried to focus through them, but he knew the living area was going to be even brighter than his room.

Sure enough, it was blinding and he barely opened his eyes as he searched the kitchen. He ended up pulling out an orange and some leftover pasta from the fridge. He tossed the pasta into the microwave and moved to the sink to peel the orange.

However, as soon as he broke the skin, he was hit with a strong citrus smell that sent a shiver down his spine and he dropped the orange out of instinct. He stared at the fruit until the microwave timer went off. With another shiver, he carefully grabbed it by the unbroken portion and tossed it in the trash. He then washed his hands thoroughly until all he could smell on them was mixed berry hand soap.

It was only when he was back in his room, halfway through his leftovers and a party-sized bag of chips, that he realized something was up with his behavior. He stared down at his hand, lost. Why had he reacted like that? He’d never had a problem with oranges before, especially not to such an extreme. Maybe the fever was messing with his head.

Resigned to more bed rest, he finished off his food then cocooned himself back on the bed, leaving the container and bag on his desk since he didn’t want to face the bright light again. He dozed until he was woken up by Uncle Happy coming into the apartment.

“Kid, you still in bed?” he yelled, shutting the door and locking it.

“Yeah,” Peter groaned, clenching his fists around his comforter. “Not so loud, please. Why is everyone yelling today?”

“Kid?” Uncle Happy stomped down the hall and opened Peter’s door. “Peter?”

Peter shushed him.

Uncle Happy stomped up to his bed and sat down on the edge, reaching over to rub up and down his side. “How are you feeling, kid?” he asked. He wasn’t yelling anymore, but he was still a little loud.

Why couldn’t anyone whisper?

“A little better,” Peter sighed. “Still hurts and tired.”

“I see you got up to eat.”

“Mm-hm. Really hungry.”

“Clearly. You ate enough to satisfy Cap. Feeling nauseous at all?”

“No.”

“That’s good. When was the last time you took any medicine?”

“Nebs gave me some Tylenol before she left.” He considered mentioning that it hadn’t seemed to help, but kept quiet, figuring he must have just fallen asleep before it kicked in and woken up after it wore off.

“Alright. I’m going to go grab the thermometer and some more Tylenol, okay?”

“Mm-hm.”

He quickly did as he said and Peter swallowed the pills while Uncle Happy held the thermometer in his ear.

“Well, your fever’s gone down some. That’s good. Must just be a bug or something,” Uncle Happy said, rubbing his shoulder. “You need anything else?”

“‘M okay.”

“Alright. I’ll get you some more water before I leave. Give one of us a call if anything happens before Nebula gets home, alright?”

“Okay,” Peter agreed, burrowing back into his cocoon. “Can you also grab me some jerky?”

“Still hungry?”

“A little.”

“An appetite’s good, right? Yeah, probably. That it?”

“Yes, please.”

Uncle Happy ruffled his hair. “Get some rest. I’ll leave your snacks on your bedside table.”

Peter groaned and ducked further into the chrysalis.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By the next morning, his fever was gone, but everything still seemed too loud and bright. The body pains were still there too, though they’d faded to a muted ache. And then there was his vision…

“Hey Peter, how are you feeling?” Nebs asked as he came into the -- thankfully darkened -- living area. “Why aren’t you wearing your glasses?”

“I’m okay, just a bit of a headache. I -” His nose twisted up and he took a step back. “What are you drinking?”

“Peppermint tea. Vision recommended it. Want some? It’s supposed to be good for headaches.”

He took a few more steps back when she held her mug out to him. “Pass.”

She raised an eyebrow before shrugging it off. She came up to him and he forced himself to stay in place, shivering at the smell. She placed her hand on his forehead and said, “Are you feeling up for school today? You don’t have a fever anymore.”

He shook his head, thinking about crowded halls and loud bells.

“Alright. You might as well come with me to the tower then.”

He nodded. He didn’t want to have to go outside, but it would be worth it to see Dad and hide away in his soundproof room with the windows blacked out.

“Go get dressed then. Don’t forget your glasses.”

Peter quickly dressed, but paused when he picked up his glasses. He put them on and everything went blurry.

What is going on?

“You almost done?” Nebs called.

“Yeah.” He put his glasses away and dug out the sunglasses he kept for the rare occasions he decided to wear his contacts.

He picked up his jacket and nearly jumped out of his skin when a spider fell out of the hood. Not taking his eyes off the bug, he reached back to grab a petri dish and its lid off his desk. It was only after it was safely trapped inside -- and held as far from him as possible -- that he realized the spider was dead. Relieved, he looked closer at it, curious about the bright red, blue, and black coloring. He’d never seen a spider like it before.

“Peter?”

“Coming.” He set the dish down and shook his jacket out. Once he was sure there were no more hidden spiders, he tried to put it on, only to find his hand stuck to the fabric. He shook his hand and tried to pull it off with his other hand, both to no avail.

“Peter hurry up.”

He spun around as his door opened.

His jacket fluttered to the ground.

“What are you doing?”

“Just putting on my jacket,” he chuckled nervously.

“Right,” she said, looking unconvinced. “Well, let’s go. I need to get to work.

“Yep, sorry,” he sighed as Nebs left. He glanced at his jacket on the ground, then grabbed another out of his closet. He pocketed his phone and put on his sunglasses before pausing. He glanced at the spider, then his door, before slipping some rubber bands around the dish and pocketing it as well.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

For the record, since I've gotten a comment about this, Harley is not Reed Richards. That's on the right track though.

Just finished writing down the Infinity War part of this and I've got to say, I cried while writing it. Why does Infinity War have to exist?

Also, place your bets now on who bites the bullet!

An update on something I mentioned in the past: Riri, Miles, Gwen, and Kamala won't be appearing in this story, unfortunately. I just don't have enough information on Riri and the Inhumans to include her or Kamala and Peter's just too early in his superhero gig for Alchemax to be trying to recreate him so two spider-powered-people will have to do for now. There are two kid heroes that don't show up in canon that will be appearing though. One who was already planned and I might have mentioned already, can't remember, while the other will be taking Riri's spot... and all that implies

[sweetblink]

Surprise, Surprise.

Surprise, Surprise.

___________________

Will Halstead x Reader

Requested by: @esoltis280

And #4 with Will Halstead please?

#4. "We're so gonna get caught, and I'm blame it on you."... "Hey, you said you wanted to do this, therefore it's not my fault."

Warning: FLUFFFF, reader is Connor's sister, and a detective.

___________________

"I'm warning you right now, if you hit me with that, you'll cook dinner." you warned.

Will Halstead froze, and dropped his Nerf gun, chuckling a bit. "Do you have eyes in the back of your head, babe?"

You chuckled as you turned the stove on low, and turned to him. "No, I just have spectacular hearing, also, I'm a detective, remember."

Will laughed and walked over to you, and kissed your head. "I'm home." he greeted.

"I can see that." You laughed. "How was your shift?"

"Chaotic, but I saved my patient today." he replied.

You gave him a soft smile and checked the food once more, and then turned the stove off, you pulled Will out of the kitchen and towards the room, in hopes of giving him a small massage. "So I was thinking."

Finally entering the room, Will took off his scrub shirt, and his undershirt, and turned to you. "Uh oh, that's a bad sign." he teased.

You scoffed and pushed him on the bed, while he just laughed. "You're so mean." you whined.

Will just smiled and pulled you towards him, making you straddling his lap. "I'm kidding, so what were you thinking."

"Connor's birthday is coming up, and I wanna surprise him with a small birthday dinner, and leave him a big surprise gift." You replied, massaging his shoulder. "Just wanna spoil him a little, I know things are all tensed with Dr. Bekker, so I want to cheer up my older brother.

"Are you sure?" Will asked. "I mean he's been moody lately, and the tension between Bekker and him keeps getting worse."

You sighed. "I don't understand them, they like a love/hate thing going on. But anyways, are you in?"

Will just stared at you and nodded. "Fine, but only because I know you'd continuing badgering me if I said no."

You smiled innocently and just giggled. "I would never."  

Will just chuckled and started to kiss your neck, you let out small sigh, and exposed your neck a bit more. "We can eat dinner a bit late, right?" he asked.

***************************

"I'm literally questioning my sanity right about now." Will whispered. You let out a low scoff, and elbowed him, he let out a small grunt.

"Shut up." You whispered back.

"We're so gonna get caught, and I'm blame it on you." Will groaned quietly.

"Hey, you said you wanted to do this, therefore it's not my fault." You whispered back fiercely.

"It's still gonna be your fault." Will mumbled. You just rolled your eyes, and broke into your the apartment.

You and Will silently tip toed into your brother's apartment, you were about to set his gift bag on the kitchen counter, when you both heard load moans, you froze and turned to stare at your boyfriend, with eyes wide.

"Oh god." you moaned in agony. "Nope, we're leaving." You rushed out to the apartment when you bumped into a table, you let out a hiss of pain, and dropped a vase, you cursed, when you heard the room go silent. You quickly straighten out, turned the lights on, grabbed your keys, and held in your hands. "Quick, act natural." you hissed at Will.

Will rushed to the door, and acted like he was just closing it, you were facing him, silently giggling.

"Y/N? Will?" you heard Connor.

You turned to your brother, and smiled widely. "Hi big bro, I knocked and you didn't open so I assumed you were asleep, and decided to use my key to open it."

Connor looked confused. "Y/N, it's midnight, what are you doing here?"

You sighed. "My apartment building smelled horribly, so I complained to Will, he called the fire department to check it out, and decided to come over." you somewhat lied easily.

"Connor, who's at the doo-" A blonde girl appeared next to Connor, and you saw her tense up when she saw you. "Oh, and you are?"

"Y/N, Y/N Rhodes." you replied evenly.

The blonde girl gave you a tight smile and you turned to your brother. "I know I came late, and uninvited, but we please stay the night? I'll make your favorite birthday breakfast, in the morning."

Connor facial's changed into a more happy one, and smiled. "Of course you can stay baby girl." You squealed and rushed to hug him.

"Oh, also, this is for you." Handing him the gift bag. Connor smiled and accepted it. He reached in and grabbed it, you looked back at Will and smiled.

"Congratulations, Daddy?" Connor asked confused. You let out a small gasp. "Wait a minute." Connor looked up at Will shocked, while he did the same thing, and then they turned to you.

"Babe. You got the wrong bag!" You squeaked in horror.

"You're pregnant?!" they both yelled.

Your mouth dropped to form an O, and finally let out a small smile. "Surprise?" you said to Connor, and then turned to Will "Surprise."

"I'm gonna be a dad." Will breathed out. "Oh, I'm gonna be a dad?"

You looked at him and smiled. "Yes Will, you're going to be a dad." Will rushed over to you, and picked you up.

"Oh baby." Will said, kissing you all over your face. "I gotta call Jay." he said excitedly, rushing outside the apartment to call him. You turned back to your brother. and he walked over to you.

"So I'm guessing that wasn't my actual present." He teased. You giggled and shook your head no.

"That was supposed to be Will's, your present is actually something different, I was going to surprise you with a onesie and a shirt that said #1 Uncle and #1 Nephew, after I revealed my pregnancy to Will." you explained smiling. Connor just chuckled and hugged you tightly.

"You're growing up way to fast, what happened to no boyfriends till you were 50." Connor teased, getting a bit emotional, you just sniffed and giggled.

"That went out the window, when I fell in love with Will." You said, giving the blonde girl a watery smile, Bekker, smiled you both and left to the kitchen.

Will finally came back in, smiling very wide, and plucked you away from your brother, Connor laughed, and left to join his, whatever it was to him, in the kitchen. "Jay sounded happy after I broke the news to him." He told you.

"Is that right?" you teased.  

Will smiled and nodded, he placed a hand over your stomach and rubbed small soft circles. "You just made me the happiest man alive." he told you, kissing the side of your hair. You smiled and relaxed into his side.

"I love you." You breathed out.

"I love you too, baby." Will replied, peppering you with soft kisses.

___________

This is the cutest thing I’ve written, omg

Masterlist. 

[its-ok-to-smile]

Some memorable scenes from Avengers: Infinity War

(and some of my thoughts)

{Spoilers beneath cut. Apologies to those on mobile, you’ll have to blindly scroll}

[Note: not a quotes will be verbatim]

The desperation in Loki’s voice in the distress call.

That whole opening scene, GOD DAMN!

We didn’t see them, but there’s a good chance, Valkerie, Korg, and Meek are dead as well

Like Thanos whole thing is that he kills half of wherever, so maybe he took a fraction of them prisoner, but STILL!

“We have a hulk”, reminds me of when the first Avengers came out, Chris said at some carpet interview he wished Loki was an Avenger

Some people were wondering why Heimdall sent Hulk to Earth, I personally thought it was that he was sent to warn them

HEIMDALL! LOKI!(I’m glad I got over my crush on him, I would’ve been ever more distraught than I already was)

Thor just clinging to his brother as the ship blows up, he’s lost everything, he’s broken.

‘‘You don’t believe in worldly possessions[...] Well maybe I can tell that to the Deli people and they’ll make you an ethereal sandwich.

Tony and Pepper talking about having kids! Also, matching jumpsuits!

Science bros hugging!

“Your embarrassing me in front of the wizards”

Hulk is scared!

“Cause a distraction” “WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!”

“Ain’t you kids ever seen a spaceship before”

But it can’t be a good sign if they’re getting the Stan Lee cameo out of the way so soon

“Whats going on?” “This guy wants to steal a necklace from a wizard”

Russo Brothers: “Ok look, we’ve got enough character in this movie as is, so Wong, you’re done now”

“I can’t be a ‘Friendly Neighborhood Spider-man’ if there’s no neighborhood. That sounded better in my head”

“The kids seen more movies than me”

THE GUARDIANS!! (Seriously their introduction was awesome)

Pretty much all the Guardians agreeing that Quill has put on weight

“This is a wake-up call[...] Gonna get a couple dumbbells” “You can’t eat dumbbells Quill”

“Thanos desecrated Xandar” does that mean Irani and Rhomann are dead as well?

Apparently they didn't have raccoons on Asgard, but they did have rabbits, which looked enough like raccoons to be mixed up

“Swear on your mother” “Ok”

FINALLY GOT A PETER/GAMORA KISS!

“How long have you been there?” “An hour”

I think this was the first time we ever heard Drax refer to his daughter by name(He said his wife’s name in GOTG2)

“I told you to go left”

Peter loves Gamora so much, he’s willing to live without her because of his promise to her

‘Groot’ is an Asgardian elective

Love how the series messes with expectations, such as Dwarfs being the closer to the size of Frost Giants

Groot stepping up to the plate and making the handle

Steve having a total Batman moment with that train

Alot of people pointed put that he ditched the star on his chest and the ‘A’ on his shoulder, but i don’t think anyone mentioned that he never wore his helmet either

Not gonna lie, when I saw promo art for Natasha, my first thought was ‘TRAITOR!’ (I have red hair)

“Arrest them” “Yes Sir” *hangs up”

So that’s why Clint and Scott weren’t in any of the promos

‘‘There’s an Ant-man and a Spider-man?”

“WHY IS GAMORA!!

“Is Footloose still the greatest movie ever?” “It never was” >:O

I know it’s horrifying, but that was a really cool perspective shot they did with Nebula

Thanos knew that torturing Gamora wouldn’t make her tell him where the stone is

Thanos: “I’ll just leave this woman, that I literally turned into a killing machine, in a room with just one guard”

I was actually nervous that the cloaked figure was Death, and they had decided to make her a man, but then RED SKULL!!

After so many movies, I thought they decided not to do anything with that cliffhanger.. but NOPE

PLEASE don’t let that be a permanent death, Quill has lost enough already, and obviously Gamora deserves so much better

“We can’t just wing it” “That’s kind of our whole thing”

“Tell them how you saved the galaxy with a dance-off”

“I was thinking the Olympics, or a Starbucks”

Rhodey trolling Bruce on Wakandan customs

[...]“And a war veteran whose 100 years old”

Steve and Bucky hugging!

“Why didn’t you just reprogram the synapses to work connectivity?” (pause) “Because we didn’t think of it..”(plus Vision’s expression when Shuri says it)

The look Okoye gives Bruce when he trips

Jabaris war cry(and they keep doing it throughout the battle)

The respect from M’Baku to T’Challa, considering how they used to be

“This is the end of Wakanda” “Then a glorious end it shall be”  “WAKANDA FOREVER”

“Why was she up there the whole time?”

Okoye+Natasha team up!

Then Wanda joins in! (my gay heart couldn’t handle it)

“That was gross”

*Thor shows up* “Oh now you’re screwed”

“I am Groot” *Places hand on chest* “I. am. Steve Rogers” 

Bucky just picking up Rocket and doing a spinning machine gun attack

“I am so getting that arm”

“Yeah you look a Thanos” 

I remember after the credits started, I heard the guy next to me say, “All that could have been avoided if Quill hadn’t punched Thanos’’ But that is Quill’s character, he’s always been emotion-driven, it was because of his emotions that he saved the day in both of his movies(Illogically grabbing the stone, using his ‘heart’)

“I’ve got you! And you! I’m sorry I don’t remember your names!”

“If you throw another moon at me I’m gonna kick your ass”

+++++((Now the sad stuff))+++++

Wanda having to kill the love of her life, just for it to be pointless

“Steve?”

Wanda didn’t even seem to care when she died

When T’Challa went to help up Okoye, I was expecting her to ‘dust’, but then he did, the look of pure horror/confusion on her face

Rhodey searching for Sam(also just how they were constantly looking out for each other in the battle)

I see alot of people saying how sad it was Tony watching his adopted son die(and while I agree) I feel like they’re looking over the other adopted son dying scene: Rocket and Groot

The way Groot says his line almost like question but also with a hint of fear to it(As with every movie, props to Vin Diesel, for being able to portray so many emotions with one line) And Rocket just quietly going "No, oh, no-no-no”

Steve just saying ‘Dear God’’, anyone else think he was starting to pray

What’s going to happen when Rocket finds out he’s the only one left

“There was no other way” anyone else suspect that was Dr. Strange admitting that there was never a future where they won.

Peter sounding so scared when he knew what was coming, the way he was just clinging to Tony, hoping he could fix it.

That scene with Thanos sitting on the hill reminded me of that quote from someone’s dream-Obama: “To become God is the loneliest achievement there is’’

Maria and Fury still working together

Dust-censoring

The after credits/Captain Marvel teaser was cool, but I will admit I was a little disappointed, cause I was expecting/hoping it would be Coulson

+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=

All the original Avengers are still alive(Hawkeye is unknown)

Everyone thought Steve and/or Tony would die, possibly Tony would die saving Peter, how wrong we were...

I suspect everyone who dusted will come back, due to several of them having sequels planned.

I also think Gamora will come back(though that’s more of a hope), like maybe they’ll use some excuse where, only she can be revived, cause she’s the only one whose body is intact.(Heimdall and Loki blew up, the stones may be destroyed, so Vision might not come back)

Where is Shuri? Last we saw her was when Vision was attacked, I feel they would have shown if she dusted. They’re obviously not going to get everyone back right away, so that leaves her as the next ruler of Wakanda

I assume all the movies planned to come out before the next part will be set before this, but I wonder how the TV shows will work around it. They can’t all go on a X amount of years hiatus (Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. was setting up Thanos’ arrival, so they certainly can’t pretend their a couple years behind)

[newhologram]

Glorious purpose, sacrifice, and the god who started it all

Send a heartbeat to The void that cries through you Relive the pictures that have come to pass For now we stand alone The world is lost and blown And we are flesh and blood disintegrate With no more to hate

- The Beginning Is the End Is the Beginning by Smashing Pumpkins (because this song is 100% about Avengers)

Been on an MCU binge to put everything under a microscope, so here’s what’s been rolling around in my brain. 

Infinity War spoilers below with speculation/theories for Avengers 4 that includes A4 spoilery set leak stuff. 

**SPOILERS BEYOND THIS POINT**

* * *

There’s a lot to talk about as far as theories as we were given some hopeful leads in IW and other films. Just to take inventory on some other speculations and fun ideas: 

Shuri may have backed Vision up

Soul World: is that where Gamora is? Is that where everyone who was dusted went?

Nebula may get a meaningful role in helping to take Thanos down

Captain Marvel’s role in all this??

The possibility of Adam Warlock coming out of his cocoon

The Eternals maybe

Hawkeye/Ronin

Thor’s Stormbreaker handle being made of Groot somehow solving something

Thanos being overcome with grief in his isolation

The possibility of a major time jump in A4 to see how Earth has moved on after the snap, which may include Tony’s future with Pepper and their child. Everyone will have lived so many years with the consequences of the snap.

It also feels like each character might have to go on their own hunt for the stones, which might lead to an interesting reversal of the loss and sacrifice they faced in IW. I wonder who gets assigned to each stone and how that’ll play out for their individual character arc? There’s one stone for each original Avenger, so that’s cool to think about 

Erasing versus dying. If you’ve heard anything about “the Event” that a lot of astrologers have been talking about lately, basically our reality is due for a cosmic event which splits us—leaving people behind and taking the rest into a prosperous new universe. Some will be “erased” from this existence. It’s been called the Rapture. Which is uh. Pretty interesting considering IW premiered on the actual date of the rapture prediction and how the Snap is absolutely a kind of sad superhero bad ending rapture. 

Rewriting everything that we’ve seen in the past 6 years in canon

I’ve also seen some talk of theories such as “Loki is Bruce Banner in disguise”. I can see why this theory is popular because Bruce acts really weird the whole movie and seems to know things he shouldn’t. But I’m not too into it because it feels like there’s a big payoff coming with the Hulk (as in, we better get a cool shot of him bursting out of the Hulkbuster armor, like the toy).

There’s also some talk about spotting Quicksilver and even Wolverine on the set but I have nooo idea what those would even mean, not just in regards to the plot but with the whole joint custody thing Sony, Fox and Disney have been working out. 

All of that said, I’ve been thinking about a few other threads in particular though, so that’s what I’ll be exploring here. Just speculation for fun. Let’s see where it leads.

☀ Undying Fidelity

The opening scene was really suspicious to me for many reasons. These directors are sharp and I believe there is purpose to everything we see as well as what we don’t see.

Let’s talk about my boy Loki.

He starts out pretty scared. The guy is sweating bullets. 

After the Hulk engages Thanos, Loki isn’t on screen for several minutes. We don’t see him reacting or hiding or anything. I don’t trust that, especially not with the Russo bros directing it. I feel as though something is being hidden from us in this moment, distracted by the Hulk just as much as the bad guys are.

When he reappears to offer himself as a guide to Thanos, suddenly his demeanor is totally different. He seems calm, resolved even. 

His choice of words is very important. The most suspicious to me are: “rightful heir to Jotunheim”, “God of Mischief”, “do hereby pledge my undying fidelity”. Loki does not want us to forget that he’s not only a Jotunn, not Asgardian by blood, but he’s a God, and a very, very cunning one. To be honest, it doesn’t feel like that last line was for Thanos at all. It honestly feels like he’s saying it to someone else—maybe himself. To his own duty in this moment. Which brings me to the next bullet point:

After that last line, dagger forming, his eyes quickly dart down. There’s a pause. A small beat there. He looks as though he’s steeling himself. That, to me, is the face of a man who very much knows he’s about to die. It’s a very Obi-Wan moment, right in front of Thor. It’s somehow even more heartbreaking if he knew it was coming, and was still so scared and small when Thanos wrapped his fist around his neck. 

Loki’s a smart cookie. He may be relatively young for a god/alien but this isn’t his first rodeo. He already knows how deadly and terrifying Thanos is without the Gauntlet/stones, so what does he think he can do right now? He knows a little dagger isn’t going to win this for them and that’s precisely the point. He isn’t dumb enough to try that sincerely, which makes me believe even more that it was strategic. I have a feeling Thanos chiding him about his choice in words (”undying”) is going to come back to bite him in the ass.

Back to Loki’s words being important. When he’s first about to surrender the Tesseract earlier in the scene, he says to Thor, "I promise you, brother, the sun will shine on us again."  He says it with so much purpose.

And his final words to Thanos: “You will never be a god.” Another reminder: Loki is a god. He’s survived a black hole, stabbing, Hulk-smashing, Grandmaster’s orgies, and likely more in his years. We’ve come to expect him to fake his own death by this point, though I’m still on the fence about whether this one was fake, or a necessary one he knew needed to happen, or somehow a bit of both. I wonder, only a little, where did Loki’s body go, is it just floating around with the rest of the dead? 

For that matter, where the hell is Valkyrie? Is there any meaningful payoff rather than just humor for Korg calling Loki a ghost in Ragnarok? I’m not too hopeful for something like that, but it’s a thought. 

Later on in the film we see Thor, another god, (barely) survive the concentrated full force of a dying star. I’m supposed to believe Loki, an incredibly gifted frost giant child trained in the arts of magic, Loki Ha Ha Duplicates of Me Everywhere Odinson, Loki I’m Right Where I Need to Be Laufeyson just has a sudden brain fart, tries to stab the Mad Titan, gets his neck snapped in front of his brother, and it’s not on purpose? 

BITCH. DID. NOT. TURN. BACK. TO. BLUE. 

Do I really think Loki is still alive? I don’t know. Loki is very, very dear to me but like I said, I’m on the fence. Because it seems like the deaths that happened before the snap, save for Gamora, might be permanent because we needed to feel that the stakes were high. On the other hand, again, Loki is very gifted. We’ve seen him “die” before and I still have a very hard time believing he’s fully dead and not god-level deep coma smacked down needing time to regenerate if he doesn’t just turn blue right after since his iconic look is an illusion too. His line about the sun shining on them again uses the word “us”, which could indicate a revival and reunion somehow. 

But I’m cry because you know he and Thor got into a lot of trouble growing up, and big brother was always there for him. But then little brother goes through some hard stuff, falls into a black hole, gets picked up by a cult, and it all comes down to this moment now: no home to return safely to, no mother to console him after Odin’s discipline, Thor unable to save him. 

♥ We Don’t Trade Lives

Before I go into A4 speculation, let’s look at how each character deals with sacrifice, just for fun: 

Loki is given a choice: his brother’s life, or the Space Stone → Loki surrenders and sacrifices himself 

Quill is given a choice: the love of his life, or Thanos getting closer to winning → Quill is hesitates and is unable to keep his promise of sacrificing Gamora

Gamora is given a choice: her sister, or the location of the Soul Stone  → Gamora surrenders to spare Nebula 

Thanos is given a choice: his favorite daughter, or the Soul Stone → Thanos sacrifices Gamora for the stone

Dr. Strange is given a choice: Tony Stark, or the Time Stone → Despite earlier warning Tony he wouldn’t hesitate to sacrifice either him or Peter if it means keeping the Time Stone safe, he surrenders the stone → He sacrifices his duty, his life, and the lives of everyone else who gets dusted in order to put them on the one right path he saw out of over 14 million

Wanda is given a choice: Vision, or the Mind Stone → Her struggle with this choice starts earlier on when Vision offers to sacrifice himself to destroy the Mind Stone → Cap tells him “we don’t trade lives”  → Wanda is also not willing to immediately kill him when asked → They run out of time and options, Wanda finally sacrifices Vision, which as we saw didn’t really work out the way they wanted

Our characters struggle with sacrificing something important to them in order to save the universe (remember, in the eyes of Thanos, he’s saving the universe too). Many of the characters value their loved ones above everything else and don’t want to have to make that choice. They don’t want to face the pain of a life without that person, or they don’t want another person to suffer or die painfully because of them.

Alright. Let’s talk bidness. 

♛   Reframe the Future

Yeah—remember B.A.R.F.? Binarily Augmented Retro-Framing. 

This has to be what Tony will use to look back at things. I see him replaying the events of the first Avengers over and over, trying to figure out how it all could’ve gone so wrong, what clues they missed, and how to fix it. 

Which brings us to the question of time travel. Is this where the idea of Infinite Avengers will come in, if the multiverse is explored? I don’t have too much of a lead on that, but it’s interesting to think about. If that ends up being the title of A4 it would certainly point to that.

(Note Tony’s greying hair which supports the idea that A4 will start 5-10 years after Infinity War)

Many have speculated about the devices on their wrists in these photos, as well as the fact that while Tony and Ant-Man seem to be their present selves, others are in their old costumes from the first Avengers. Doesn’t quite answer why Cap is wearing a device, unless they recruit lots of multiversal Avengers from various timelines/realities/points in history to help? (Wouldn’t it be crazy to find out that Ant-Man has been a secret tiny time traveling Avenger the whole time?) 

It’s hard to know exactly what kind of time travel shenanigans we’re dealing with. Maybe we’ll learn more when we see Ant-Man and the Wasp, since they’re going to be dealing with the quantum realm, where time doesn’t really exist. In the quantum realm, every possibility exists at the same time. 

We do have some clues though. 

Exhibit A: Loki in all his muzzled glory, as seen at the end of Avengers.

We know that this time travel plot would involve going back to where it all started. But what could be done, what is Tony’s play? 

Exhibit B: Tony Stark in S.H.I.E.L.D. gear. More specifically—

As one of Loki’s escorts.

What we don’t see in Avengers is how everything goes down when they take Loki back into custody (after grubbing on shawarma). We don’t see the discussion about what to do with him and Thor’s decision to take Loki and the Tesseract back to Asgard. 

So, again, what the hell is Tony’s game plan? 

If he’s disguised as a guard, there could be a chance to get alone with Loki and talk to him. Tell him everything that goes down. Get him to help. Get info from him, and make sure he knows how things need to play out in order for this all to work.

I’m not sure how yet though. It seems this could somehow involve Stark making his own Infinity Gauntlet, but that’s later down the line. Where does Loki fit into the plan beyond the time travel scene? That may be all we get of him. 

I’m so excited for the possibility of my two favorite characters working together or even having just once more scene together, however it plays out. Tony and Loki both smiled at each others’ jokes in A1 and I loved it. I feel like their dynamic would be so interesting to explore more. Tony totally clocked that Loki is a diva, because they’re both like that lol.

☮ Glorious Purpose

But what’s most interesting to me right now is the implication that if this is the closed loop kind of time travel, it would mean Loki has known about all this since the end of Avengers. 

When the Hulk was distracting everyone, was Loki hiding behind a wall, readying himself for what he knew he needed to do next? I’ve heard talk of the possibility of a duplicate since that’s what Loki does, but would Thanos have been able to tell he was killing an illusion? He didn’t have the Soul Stone then which likely helped him tell which Strange was real later. I’ve also heard talk of a Loki switchout, but I’m not too convinced because it would involve somehow transporting another Loki there. Not so sure there would be a stealthy way to do any of that. 

Did Loki die in the beginning of Infinity War fully knowing all those years that it was going to happen, that it needed to happen, in order for the sun to shine again?

Did Loki die to help save the universe?

...

If Loki knew those few weeks on Sakaar were going to be his last, do you think he was like, “Guess I better live my best life and spend my final days sipping cocktails on Grandmaster’s lap.”

My final speculation prediction REQUIREMENT from Marvel Studios is to have Avengers 4 end with a beautiful Pepperony wedding filled with superheroes. Whoever’s left, that is. 

(This also means if there’s a time jump, Tony will possibly erase the present he has with Pepper and their child in order to save everyone... Should be interesting.)

In conclusion, have this whiteboard drawing I did for @spazzeon as I tried to explain all of this

[sterek]

lols legit i just love me my fluff and mutual pining and just all types of that wonderfulness, even with light angst tbh and i love me my HS Aus or college Aus or Human Aus or anything inbetween lmfao XD Ur brilliant and hope this isn't too much of a bother =D

Sorry it took so long, I got distracted! Here are some recs :) [Sorry if I don’t have a lot of light or human fics, most of my bookmarks are heavy werewolf angst oops. I went through half my bookmarks and this is already too long lol enjy!]

I’ve Been Everywhere With You by Leslie_Knope [61k, E]

“Dude, you should totally come with me.”

“What? Like on the road trip?“

“No, come with me. To Austin. Get out of Beacon Hills.”

Derek paused. “What?” he asked again.

He’s Not Mine by Sunnee [68k, E]

Derek comes home to find an abandoned werebaby on his front porch and Stiles volunteers to help him out. Surprisingly, that is just the beginning of his problems.

302, I Love You by paintedrecs [4k, T]

It was a beautiful summer morning—mid-70s with a light breeze, ideal weather for soaking up the sun without fear of overheating. If anyone asked, that was why Stiles was sitting on his balcony with a book he hadn’t touched in the last half hour and a mug of coffee he’d been absently sipping from, his gaze fixed on the parking lot several stories below.

Coincidentally, one of his neighbors—Hot Dude From 302, not that it was relevant—had chosen the same morning to wash his stupidly flashy Camaro.

Shyft by paintedrecs [6k, T]

Derek finally gave the driver more than a passing glance.

He was roughly Derek’s age and surprisingly handsome, despite the ugly plaid shirt he’d rolled up past his elbows. He had broad shoulders, honey-dark hair, a line of moles trailing enticingly along his cheek, and thick eyelashes framing dark eyes that glittered with humor. And he was laughing at Derek.

***

At the end of a long work day, all Derek wanted was to get home as quickly as possible. When his scheduled ride showed up—distractingly good-looking, driving a beat-up Jeep, and full of interesting conversation—Derek felt like his evening might turn out a whole lot better than he’d expected. Until his trust issues flared back to life, telling him "Stiles” wasn’t everything that he’d seemed.

Lovebitten by LunaCanisLupus_22 [10k, M]

The one where Derek gets bitten by a lovebug and Stiles is the first person he lays eyes on. Hilarity ensues.

Bricks by paintedrecs [8k, T]

“Mornin’, love,“ Derek says, and Stiles freezes in his arms. They haven’t exchanged official I love you’s yet, and Derek seems determined to derail Stiles’s plans to say it first. With fireworks. Or bubble baths. Something epic.

The point is, Derek barely even seems to realize he’s doing it, and it’s driving Stiles crazy.

Or: My first time writing a 5 + 1 fic.

remember my love by bleep0bleep [23k, T]

Stiles wakes up and suddenly the war is over, he’s no longer a penniless mage, and living in an exquisite manor married to the man he’s been in love with for far too long.

“It’ll be fine,” Stiles says gallantly. “I am certain I will just fall in love with my husband all over again, and I will find plenty of joy doing that.” He winks at Derek for good measure.Derek blinks.

ritten in the Stars by Quixoticity [26k, M]

Derek Hale is a lucky guy. He’s got a great family, good friends, and a fulfilling job as a tattoo artist.

He’s also one of the twenty-five per cent of the population born with a soul mark.

He likes his life, but he’s waiting for his soul-match. The odds of meeting them aren’t great but hey, Derek’s a lucky guy. He has faith.

He can’t believe how good his luck really is when one day his soul-match wanders right into his studio, all long limbs and copper eyes. There’s just one problem: Stiles is there to get his soul mark covered up. Permanently.

No Homo by RemainNameless [84k, E]

Stiles’ sophomore year starts something like this:3 FourLokos+ 1 peer-pressuring cat- 1 best bro to end all best bros= 1 Craigslist ad headline that reads "str8 dude - m4m - strictly platonic”.Derek is the fool who replies.

Cross our bridges when we come to them by RemainNameless [103k, M]

The five times Derek called the Sheriff “Dad” on accident and the first time he did it on purpose.

Our Hearts Are Tigers by skoosiepants [7k, T]

This is what Stiles figures out after a week of harboring Isaac: he’s kind of a dick, for a ten-year-old.

Turn a Little Faster by skoosiepants [3k, T]

He shifts back and forth on his feet and tries to psych himself up. He can do this. He’s a badass werewolf, he can totally tell Stiles that they accidentally got werewolf married because—because Stiles was thinking about him, and happened to give him a token of his, uh, affection under the silvery light of the last full moon. Platonic affection, Derek thinks sourly, so he doesn’t get why his wolf feels all warm and fuzzy and bonded all of a sudden.

Honestly, it’s like—why aren’t people accidentally getting werewolf married all the time, if it happens this easily?

Filter Out the Starlight by skoosiepants [12k, T]

“Why are you not more curious about me?” Stiles says when Derek’s got the door half open, sun spilling over the dark wood, dust motes spinning about his legs. Stiles is wearing fabric that hasn’t been invented yet, he’s clutching a smart phone to his chest, and he appeared out of nowhere, like an angel.

Softly, Derek says, “We all have our secrets,” and closes the door.

Or-

A heartbroken Stiles accidentally travels back in time to find his one true love. A harlequin-ish Christmas romance.

Under Yellow Moons by skoosiepants [17k, T]

They stare at each other, half-grinning, and Derek knows it’s definitely the absolute wrong time for this, but he wants. He wants to grin at Stiles over dinner every day for the rest of his life, baffled over yams and Moon Pie Day, and, god, crap, goddamn, when the fuck did he have time to fall in love?

Or

The life and times of Deputy Stiles and Supernatural Foster Dad Derek Hale

Lord knows it would be the first time by uraneia [12k, E]

Stiles is home from Berkeley for the summer, but only because he promised the pack. He’d rather not see Derek, because whatever the thing was that they were doing, they’re not doing it anymore, and it sucks.

Unfortunately, he doesn’t have a choice. The betas tried a magical remedy for Derek’s melancholy, and now Stiles has a three-year-old who looks like Derek. Stiles doesn’t know how to deal with that, and he definitely doesn’t know how to tell the betas he and Derek were secret fuck buddies for a year and a half.

You Smell Like Mine by bleep0bleep [13k, E]

People talk about the alpha instinct, an alpha’s head being swayed by a nice-smelling omega, or the desire to drop everything and show off. Derek’s never felt any of that. He’s just not that kind of alpha.

Then he meets Stiles.

The Prince and His Painter by Dexterous_Sinistrous [8k, G]

Stiles was always a sick child. He was never supposed to live beyond his infancy—shocking many when he reaches adulthood. With his inevitable death looming over his country, Stiles chooses to accept a successor through marriage. His advisors commission a painter to capture the prince’s likeness in order to advertise him to potential candidates. Only, Derek Hale isn’t like most painters—or humans, for that matter.

Certain Kind of Fool by saraubs [36k, M]

Derek, who has been dragged against his will to the same resort his family visits every summer, is determined to spend the next two and a half months sequestered in his room. His only friend, his sister Laura, is preoccupied with her newly-bonded mate, and doesn’t seem to care about anything but making him happy.

When Derek meets Stiles Stilinski, a sharp-tongued waiter, he thinks that this summer might not be a complete waste of time. There are only two problems: First, Stiles is human. Second, he doesn’t believe in mates.

Painful Maneuvers by saraubs [11k, T]

Still, whether or not the nurses want to hear it, Derek has some serious issues with the way Stiles skates around the ward, upending instruments and scattering papers and chewing on pens. His scrubs never fit right and are always riding up to show patches of smooth, pale skin and his hair is frankly pornographic. It’s just so…unprofessional.

Stiles is a hyperactive Obstetrician. Derek is a grumpy Midwife. It’s true love (and babies!).

little spoon by bibliosexual [6k, T]

To save money while attending college in NYC, Stiles and Derek decide to rent one tiny apartment together. With one bed.

you know you’re on my mind by bibliosexual [16k, T]

If there’s one thing Derek’s learned in life, it’s that crushing on someone who lives on an entire other fucking continent is probably a bad idea.

Put Down in Words by paintedrecs [203k, M]

“Oh,” Stiles said, his voice coming out low and breathy, “fuck me.”

“I don’t think that’s on the syllabus, but we can check to see if there’s a spot open in any of his classes,” Scott said, grinning.

“This isn’t an actual professor, though,” Stiles insisted, unable to resist brushing his thumb over the sharp line of the man’s bearded jaw. He was laughing at something off-camera, the shot taken in three-quarters view, his coat collar casually rumpled and opened to reveal a sliver of a simple grey t-shirt. The whole thing was deliberately calculated to lend him a more accessible feel, and god help him, Stiles was falling for it.

*

When Stiles signed up for Dr. Hale’s intro to history class, he had two goals: knock out the credits his advisor was bugging him to complete before he graduated, and spend a few hours a week daydreaming about his sexy professor’s salt and pepper beard.

Derek, a few months away from turning forty and not sure when his life had started feeling so damn lonely, had never encountered someone like Stiles before. Bright-eyed, sharp-tongued, determined to throw Derek’s carefully cultivated world into disarray…and absolutely the last person Derek should be falling in love with.

Somewhere Else, Someone Else by megxmas [19k, T]

They’re sitting in the car, and Stiles’ dad is poring over the scans, gesturing violently at the air. ‘I just don’t understand!’ he says. ‘There’s never been anything out of the ordinary on any of your tests, and yet you always have seizures! How come nothing ever comes up?’

Stiles shrugs, has heard his dad complain about this a dozen times before. Stiles is pretty sure that he and Derek are some kind of magical soulmates and this is the way the world has decided to connect them, but somehow, he doesn’t think that’ll fly as an explanation.

Cupboard Love by mklutz [32k, G]

He’s carefully balancing the sandwiches and the two biggest tupperware containers he could find that both had functioning lids when the front door opens and he almost drops everything right there in front of the stupid fountain.

If that’s Derek Hale, he’s definitely not a mountain man.

The Epic Love Story of Wolf and Twister by KeriArentikai [11k, E]

Stiles has a tiny adorable hyper puppy. Derek has an awesome huge Malamute mix. They both go to the dog park a lot.

So, obviously, Sterek ensues.

One life stand by Vendelin [84k, E]

Stiles is used to selling himself to make ends meet. But it’s getting harder to keep those ends meeting, and there’s only so much of Stiles to go around. Until a too-fancy car shows up in his neighborhood, and he meets Derek Hale.

All Derek wants is Stiles’s time, someone to stay on his arm for events and smile for the cameras. It’s the easiest job Stiles has ever had, the best-paying one he’s ever had, and he’s more than happy to sign up.

Derek is everything and nothing Stiles expects him to be, with his tailored suits, sharp mind and his quiet way of caring. But it’s just a job and Stiles never meant to fall in love.

only fools rush in by decideophobia [13k, T]

Is it an imaginary date?

No. I met him in a coffee shop.

When?

This morning. It was love on first sight.

Millstone by eleanor_lavish [31k, E]

Derek waits until the door is shut behind him before he turns around. He holds out his hand, plants his ‘if you’re not weird about it, I won’t be’ smile on his face and says, “Nice to meet you, Stiles. I’m Michael. What kind of a good time are you looking for tonight?”

In Other Words, Baby, Kiss Me by primroseshows [61k, E]

Stiles has simple goals in life. To successfully complete his secret radar project without getting fired, to get a cottage on the Moon, and to untangle his mess of feelings for Moon Station 3 deputy, Derek Hale. Heck, he’ll even settle for two of the three.

i have always been the storm by stilinskisparkles [25k, E]

“You’re all headed out to Oklahoma in a week.”

Derek snaps his head up, stares at him in horror, “No, boss.”

“Yes,” Finstock insists in a steely voice. “The NSSL have been on at us for a year about some decent exposure, and I think you’re just the team to do it.”

“I haven’t done weather since college,” Derek protests.

Boyd snorts again, presumably because he’s thinking back to the time when Derek and the weather last collided and he…. well, did the guy into the weather for a brief, wonderful, terribly foolish time. But, Boyd needs to shut up before Derek punches him on the nose.

Abominable by Revenant [20k, T]

Where Derek buys a secluded cabin halfway up a mountain, meets a yeti and falls in love with Stiles, but not necessarily in that order.

The Cintron Hall Situation by dragon_temeraire [3k, T]

Stiles is freezing and miserable in his dorm, so he decides to knock on his hot neighbor Derek’s door for help.

nothing ever promised tomorrow today by preromantics [11k, T]

Grocery shopping, waking up, lasagna, and parallel universes. / When Stiles jumps the last two stairs and turns into the kitchen he’s got his mouth halfway open around “Morning, Mom,” before his dad folds down his paper at the kitchen table to look at him.

In a Straight Line Down by standinginanicedress [40k, T]

“So you want to go to Prom with me just so you can get a plastic crown and a fifty dollar gift card to Outback Steakhouse.”

Stiles sets his jaw. He wants to go to prom with Derek because he wants to go to prom with Derek. But, of course, he’s stubborn and prideful and can’t admit to Derek how it’s barely been twelve hours since they officially broke up and he’s already barely handling it as it is, so he just raises his chin in the air and says, “yes.”

Our Puddle is Deceptively Deep by calrissian18 [10k, E]

They start out in a literal tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G.

In This World or the Next by Lissadiane [20k, T]

Derek wakes up to the smell of frying bacon and brewing coffee on an ordinary morning in his ordinary life, but he can’t help but shake the feeling that he’s forgotten something important. It probably has to do with the three wishes he’d been granted by the fae after saving the life of their fairy prince, and possibly also the sheriff’s missing son.

In which Derek Hale learns that sometimes being given what we want more than anything else has disastrous consequences.

The Socioeconomic Repercussions of Mutually Assured Destruction by alocalband [15k, E]

"The trouble with having the kind of brain that likes to write essays on male circumcision for an Economics class, is that it also likes to turn PowerPoint presentations for Biology into odes on the perfection of notorious bad boy Derek Hale’s backside.”

Five Times Derek and Stiles Kissed For Practice (And One Time They Didn’t) by mikkimouse [5k, T]

In which Derek and Stiles grow up together and practice kissing, roughly in that order.

Little Promises by crossroadswrite [2k, G]

Derek doesn’t really know what happened. He just knows there was a lady and she was pretty but she was also really mean and she was trying to hurt his friends.

“Holy fuck,” Erica mutters and is harshly shushed by Isaac.

“Don’t swear in front of the kid.”

“It’s not a kid,” Erica counters. “It’s just-“

“Derek?”

King of the Road by Stoney [30k, E]

Derek sees the guy–all long lines, furtive glances, hungry–leaning against the diner out in the middle of nowhere. Yeah, Derek’s hungry, too.

tide pulls from the moon by paintedrecs [45k, M]

hen Derek left Beacon Hills, finally ripping the tether free and remembering how to breathe, how to live again, it was Stiles who came after him. Stiles, who showed up at his door with blazing eyes, looking like he wanted to punch him in the face, but wrapping his arms around him instead, making him grunt in surprise at the raw strength of his embrace.

“You asshole,” Stiles said, slapping him heartily on the back as he extricated himself, his voice rough under his bright smile. “You couldn’t have made yourself harder to find, could you?”

The Summer of Snow Cones and Not-Dates by clarkoholic, skywardsmiles [38k, M]

Summer is really boring. Like, mind-numbingly boring. Except for the part where Stiles can’t figure out if Derek’s his boyfriend, or why every werewolf in town keeps approaching him in the bathroom.

Teenage Dream by matildajones [58k, M]

“I’m married. I’m married to Derek Hale,” Stiles says. Everything seems to hit him at once. He pushes aside the fact there’s a celebrity sitting right next to him, and then thinks of why the fuck he can’t remember him, why he doesn’t know who he’s married to, and how much time he must have lost.–After an accident, Stiles wakes up to what can only be a dream. He has money, he has fame, he has award winning actor Derek Hale as his husband. It quickly seems more and more like a nightmare because Stiles doesn’t remember getting any of it - and it’s hard to accept the reality that Derek can still love him.

You look like my next mistake by Vendelin [15k, T]

“So, are you dating someone new? Someone who doesn’t mind that you’re frigid?” Kate cocks her head to the side, smiling as though she just asked him about where he bought his shoes.

His entire body sighs in defeat as his shoulders grow square. Just as he opens his mouth, someone comes up to stand beside him, snaking an arm around his shoulders. When he glances to his side, expecting to see Isaac, his brain seems to malfunction. Because it isn’t Isaac. It’s Stiles Stilinski, the lacrosse talent of the year, a senior who Derek has seen multiple times from far away, but never ever talked to.

In which Derek is a nerd jock, and Stiles is a frat guy, and Derek falls for him even though he knows he shouldn’t.

A Problematic Loyalty by alocalband [4k, T]

The problem isn’t that Stiles is stubborn. The problem is that people keep hitting on him.

Not Quite Lost (Not Quite Found) by alocalband [25k, E]

A year after the nogitsune is defeated, Derek is living a quiet life in the mountains above a small town in Colorado.

Then Stiles shows up.

‘Till You Make It by standinginanicedress [46k, M]

“I’m saying – let’s fake it.”

Derek blinks at him. Hard. Stiles never knew that someone could physically make a blink look hard, but there Derek goes, slamming his lids together like he’s fucking exercising them. “Fake it.”

“Pretend, dumbass,” he backhands Derek lightly on his upper arm. “Pretend like we’re doing as well as our parents want us to and then they’ll be off our backs, right?”

“We don’t have to pretend anything, Stiles,” Derek says evenly, in a tone that suggests he’d much rather be yelling. “We’re literally soulmates.”

“That’s the beauty of it! It’s going to be so fucking easy. I can’t believe we never thought of this before,” he runs his hands through his hair and shakes his head in amazement, grinning from ear to ear. “Holy shit. I can’t believe I just solved all our problems for us, man.”

Kindred Spirits by Stoney [104k, E]

Stiles is the adopted son of the Sheriff, brought to Beacon Hills to hopefully stay for good. A family, a best friend, school, Jackson as Josie Pye (because who else could he be?) and the mystery of a dark haired, green-eyed boy which leads Stiles to discovering a secret within himself.

we’re catching bullets in our teeth (it’s hard to do but they’re so sweet) by prettyasadiagram [12k, M]

Stiles says he’s a Web Developer. Derek says he an Internal Auditor.

They’re both liars, but you can’t exactly tell your significant other that you kill people for a living, now can you?

Insane Chemistry (with Derek Hale) by theroguesgambit [13k, M]

Derek is the popular, varsity jock, prom king of the school, and Stiles is not going to be the cliche that ends up falling for him. (It’s not a cliche if no one else knows about it, right?)

Strut on a Line, its Discord and Rhyme by xiaq [61k, T]

“Carry me,” Stiles says.

“No.”

“But I’m injured.”

“You have a rash,” Derek says. “On your arm. Your feet work just fine.”

“Please?”

“No. You weigh almost as much as I do. And you ate a pound of chicken at lunch.”

"Well, yeah, but I pooped like an hour ago, so.”

“You’re disgusting.”

“Don’t play, you love me.”

I do, Derek thinks, relatively horrified. I really do.

But Then What… by Stoney [24k, E]

Senior year is almost over, and all Stiles needs to do is keep his head down to survive. A teacher calls in a favor, leaving him stuck tutoring Derek Hale, one of the most popular jocks in school and a member of a group of douchecanoes who have bullied Stiles for years. He’s someone Stiles totally hates. Totally. Like, doesn’t like him even a little bit. DEFINITELY isn’t attracted to him.

Except that is a total lie. Fuck his life, seriously.

The Great Pretender by talktowater [45k, E]

Stiles is the new kid at Beacon Hills High, class of 1958 and he’s trying to make an impression. Derek can’t figure out why this kid is so set on making such a bad one.

Here’s to the Static by matildajones [80k, T]

Stiles spends most of his college break in a coffee house where he stares after Derek Hale. For some reason, Stiles is unaware of the fact he’s quite the musician, and Derek amuses himself at Stiles’ obliviousness.

Cross a Canyon (with a broken limb) by theroguesgambit [18k, T

“You never graduated,” Stiles says, just to say it. To test it out in the open air. That’s… huh.

–

Stiles spends his senior year battling troll-gremlins, taking on an unexpected tutoring job, and definitely not falling for a certain sourwolf (even though everyone else seems to think he is).

The Rest Is Unwritten by mikkimouse [6k, T]

Once upon a time, the werewolf king and queen invited five fairies to the christening of their only son. The fairies bestowed the boy with gifts—beauty, grace, wit, and the most adorable teeth in all the land.

But before the fifth fairy could give her gift, a wicked fairy from the other Court arrived and cast a terrible curse on the baby prince. He would have a life full of tragedies, she declared, and die young, of a broken heart.

The king and queen were beside themselves with grief. It was very old, powerful magic, so there was little they could do to break it. However, the fifth fairy had yet to give her gift. The curse could not be broken, she told them, but it could be altered.

She bestowed upon the prince the gift of perseverance, so that he would never lose his will to live, even in the face of countless tragedies. And when he found the one who would stand by his side and face those tragedies with him without fail, that is when the curse would be broken. Because the fairy knew there was nothing in all the world more powerful than true love. Not even a wicked fairy’s curse.

Laying Groundwork by LunaCanisLupus_22 [10k, E]

His expression isn’t much to go by but the entire clubs howling gets louder at his appearance and Stiles literally pops a boner watching the guy’s big hands wrestle with the microphone stand.

Or the one where Scott and Stiles go clubbing and there’s this broody Bouncer out to get Stiles-

Or get into his pants. Thank God it’s the latter.

By a Law Divine by mirrorkill [23k, M]

Okay, so, kissing Stiles. That’s a weird thing that Derek’s doing now. He has no idea where it’s even coming from, especially considering bickering and fighting is their usual state of existence.And then he does find out where it’s coming from: A curse that’s making everyone in town kiss someone they have mutual feelings for. …yeah, Derek’s not even sure why he’s surprised by that.

Friends of Early Theory by Nanoochka [23k, E]

In which Derek is a gruff, struggling executive for his family’s sprawling, wealthy company in New York, and Stiles is his quirky, offbeat intern who brings him cold coffee each morning and wears stupid T-shirts to work and generally succeeds at being a thousand times more charming than Derek could ever hope to be. To the outside observer, their relationship is combative but fond, although in private Stiles and Derek have a great deal more secrets, anger, and painful history between them than Derek is prepared to acknowledge or reveal. In retrospect, that might be half of the problem.

The Way to My Heart (French Insults) by KuriKuri [10k, T]

Letting out a long sigh, Derek turns away and braces himself for the next hellish filming segment. After all, apparently he’s going to have to smile while greeting twenty-five contestants. Shit, what if they try to hug him? Or, god forbid, kiss –

He doesn’t get any further with that thought, because a limo pulls into the driveway. He braces himself for the worst. The worst, who… actually doesn’t look that horrifying.

“I’ve been dying to meet you!” she exclaims as she catches sight of him.

Then, she flings herself at him and ensnares him in a bone-crushing hug.

Scratch that – she’s completely horrifying. And Derek’s pretty sure he can hear errand boy what’s-his-face laughing in the distance.

(Or: In which Derek gets roped into being the 'eligible bachelor’ on a dating show and instead falls for one of the show’s interns.)

How I Met My Werebunny by Moku [19k, T]

“This is going to end in tears,” Scott told Derek while he watched the man easily lifting Stiles’ desk up with one hand and driving nails into the ceiling with the thumb of the other. “Probably mine.”

Or:

When a Stiles and a Failwolf love each other very much, they’ll engage in a prank war. Basically, it’s a mating ritual for dorks in love.

Wild Tonic by officerstilinskihale [11k, M]

Stiles nodded and smiled again, his teeth flashing brightly and he signed something again, before looking frustrated with himself.

“You’re welcome,” Derek told him, feeling a wave of relief when Stiles’ face brightened. That would’ve been awkward if Stiles hadn’t been trying to say thank you.

“I had a really good time, so yeah. I’m glad you came with me,” he said, feeling his face grow hot. Derek wasn’t usually like this. He wasn’t confident. Sure, he had the looks and he could flirt shamelessly when he got hit on, but he always got shy around the people he genuinely liked, not that there was too many of those.

But Stiles didn’t let him dwell on that. He gripped Derek’s arm, grinned cheekily and pointed at himself before lifting two fingers. It took a while for Derek to get it but when he did, he couldn’t stop a smile from spreading across his face.

Me too.

Practice Makes Perfect by blacktofade [21k, E]

In his sophomore year, Stiles gets dragged to lacrosse tryouts by Scott and ends up practising alongside the senior captain, Derek Hale. Stiles just wants to live long enough to become a junior.

Feline Persuasion by rensahannou (asmalltigercat) [15k, T]

Derek doesn’t need to worry about the cat living under the porch at his family’s old house, it’s just—Derek’s just used to worrying about things.

Hot Single Dad Derek Hale by WhoNatural [13k, E]

Wherein Derek is a Hot Single Dad, possibly with a little case of martyrdom, and Stiles is the newest client at his publishing house who really just wants to make him happy. Preferably while they’re both naked.

He doesn’t get to talk to Stiles a whole lot - and it’s fine, it’s professional and polite, but there is a little something that lights up in him when he thinks about him, sees him. Derek’s life has been mostly about preschool and Big Hero 6 and extra-curricular activities for so long now that it’s a shock to the system when he finds himself pre-occupied with something so… adult.And there are many, many adult things on his mind where Stiles is concerned.

I Call You Names Because I Love You by Rawren (Zimothy) [13k, M]

Years of touring with Stiles would never have prepared Derek for the day his beloved techie fell in love with someone else.

Maybe Someday (I’ll Be Home For Next Year) by ofherlionheart [16k, T]

AKA, the Grandma Stilinski fic. Derek Hale meets a Mabel Stilinski while living in New York. He learns that she has a grandson. There are miscommunications, scarves, stealth-matchmaking plans, and cookies. Many, many cookies.

my wings a hurricane by kellifer_fic [20k, T]

Stiles had been like any other kid growing up in the era of dragons. He’d watched the cartoons, the news stories, had the lunch box. When his screening at Beacon Hills High had come up negative, he’d been disappointed but unsurprised. His positive results were returned three years too late for it to be in any way convenient or cool.Or, the one where they ride dragons.

Thrill (like white-hot wire) by raisesomehale [4k, M]

Stiles made the decision that Derek was his new best friend (and that he’ll one day marry him) the day he shared his dinosaur chicken nuggets with him.

The Newlywed Game by Captain_Loki [19k, M]

Stiles is (still) single when the pack’s getaway to the Caribbean comes by (oh misplaced optimism); lucky for him Derek is committed to being uncommitted and even after all these years is still powerless against Stiles’ unique forms of persuasion.

Cue a romantic getaway for two: sun, sand, and sarcasm abound…and the two roped into competing in the Resort’s version of the Newlywed game. Only it’s completely obvious it’s going to end in disaster. Probably homicide.

Most probably homicide.

Plot twist: It doesn’t.

[Sleep]Walking After You by relenafanel [59k, M]

Derek is a sleepwalker who keeps wandering into his downstairs neighbour’s bedroom.

Stiles is pretty sure the hot guy from the park is going to kill him in his sleep. He knows he shouldn’t have been so obvious about objectifying the guy’s really fine ass.

Too bad it turns out Derek is easier to get along with when he’s sleeping.

[sourwolfstories]

what r some good long sterek fics pls help

Indelible Marks by billtheradish

The house never burned. The pack is strong. Derek will never need to be the alpha, and his sister is a troll. (Actually, most of his family is like that.)

Derek is an apprentice tattoo artist, and Stiles isn’t old enough to get ink of his own yet. But that doesn’t stop him from being interesting…

(This story is now out of buffer, but I will always announce when the next update will be, and am trying to keep to a regular posting schedule. Also, please be advised that this is essentially a rough draft. That doesn’t mean it’s riddled with typos, every chapter is edited, just that the overarching plot and side stories haven’t had a chance to be edited in full yet–but they will be. An edited version of this story will be posted eventually, so if the current length isn’t your cup of tea, just come back later.)

Home by TheTypewriterGirl

January seventh. Seven days since the start of 2015, and seven days since his father’s death.

The bastard, he thinks bitterly. The past year Derek Hale had made it blatantly obvious that he hated his scrawny guts, taking every given opportunity to shove him up against a wall, growl threats in his ears and roll his eyes whenever he stepped into the room, muttering some snide comment about how spastic or idiotic he was.

So why did he fucking volunteer to take him in?

Put Down in Words by paintedrecs

“Oh,” Stiles said, his voice coming out low and breathy, “fuck me.”

“I don’t think that’s on the syllabus, but we can check to see if there’s a spot open in any of his classes,” Scott said, grinning.

“This isn’t an actual professor, though,” Stiles insisted, unable to resist brushing his thumb over the sharp line of the man’s bearded jaw. He was laughing at something off-camera, the shot taken in three-quarters view, his coat collar casually rumpled and opened to reveal a sliver of a simple grey t-shirt. The whole thing was deliberately calculated to lend him a more accessible feel, and god help him, Stiles was falling for it.

*

When Stiles signed up for Dr. Hale’s intro to history class, he had two goals: knock out the credits his advisor was bugging him to complete before he graduated, and spend a few hours a week daydreaming about his sexy professor’s salt and pepper beard.

Derek, a few months away from turning forty and not sure when his life had started feeling so damn lonely, had never encountered someone like Stiles before. Bright-eyed, sharp-tongued, determined to throw Derek’s carefully cultivated world into disarray…and absolutely the last person Derek should be falling in love with.

Hallowed Grounds by damnfancyscotch

Everything in Beacon Hills is the same when Stiles comes home from college.

Well, except for the fact that he’s a published author now, Scott is halfway across the world with a travelling circus, Erica’s epilepsy has been cured, her boss offers him a job too, and there’s this weird black dog that seems to be following him around just to judge him.

Oh, and the murders, of course.

But other than that stuff… totally the same old BH.

The Boy and the Beast by Dira Sudis

In which events in Beacon Hills go rather differently from the start, and a Beauty and the Beast (ish) story ensues. (Scott is not a teacup and no one sings about their feelings.)

Love Thy Neighbor…He’s Hot by Triangulum

Derek and Laura seriously lucked out with Stiles as their neighbor. Yeah he can be loud, but he keeps it to normal hours, and he brings them food, they have movie nights, he’s so beautiful, and okay, Derek might be pining. The only problem is, Stiles has a girlfriend. And Derek HATES her.

OR

The one where Derek and Laura live next door to Stiles, and Derek has a completely out of control crush. A Sterek as neighbors one shot AU that got wildly out of control.

The Hollow Moon by thepsychicclam

It’s the summer after Stiles’ first year of college, and he’s working a crappy job and dealing with nightmares and anxiety - but he’s okay, he swears. He makes it through most days without too much trouble. Then, a certain werewolf comes back into town. Which Stiles doesn’t care about, nope, not at all.

After two and a half years, Derek returns to Beacon Hills with his small Pack. Though he tried to move on, something just kept drawing him back to Beacon Hills, he’s just not sure what. Now, he figures he can start building something like a life - but he keeps getting distracted by Stiles Stilinski of all people.

Permanent Fixture by linksofmemories

Derek is Scott’s older brother. Stiles is Scott’s best friend. Derek is falling in love with Stiles. This is a bit of a problem.

Wild Horses by thepsychicclam

Derek’s a drifter with no home, no destination, and no will to live. Stiles works on his family’s failing cattle and horse ranch while all his friends are going off to college. When Derek falls asleep in a random barn, exhausted and half-starved, he doesn’t expect to wake up on the other end of the sheriff’s shotgun. And Stiles sure as hell doesn’t expect his dad to invite the drifter in for breakfast.

Play Crack the Sky by WeAreTheCyclones

Excerpt from “Hale Pulls the Plug on the Future of Rock,” Rolling Stone, Issue 1203 – Oct. 2014“Fans and music industry vets alike are left reeling in the wake of bassist Derek Hale’s sudden departure from Smokes for Harris. At a time when the foursome from Beacon Hills, California seems to be on the cusp of rock superstardom after just one double platinum record, Smokes has everything to lose.”

Excerpt from “Smokes for Harris: Gladiator,” SPIN.com – Feb. 2015“Smokes for Harris gives in a little to the pop punk of yesteryear in their sophomore effort, but rather than pandering to fans of a lost era they elevate the genre in a way that hasn’t been seen in quite some time. Frontman Stiles Stilinski works double duty as singer and primary songwriter and proves that he can handle the task even without former bassist Derek Hale.“

Three Marks by sanam

"And then there was pain again, but this time it was in only three places—his arm, below his clavicle, and next to his heart, all on the left side. It felt like the skin was being sliced apart, ripped open, flayed off—And suddenly it was done.Derek looked across the room and saw the boy on the floor, looking about as bad as Derek felt.”

Derek and Stiles learn that bonding is probably best done with ridiculous amounts of video games and maybe a little bit of time.

Windows by dr_girlfriend

Derek has a new neighbor who won’t stop looking.

Excerpt:

“You’re blind,” Derek said flatly, the anger draining from him so suddenly he felt almost woozy. His vision cleared, his claws sliding back into blunt fingernails.

“Thanks for the memo, genius,” the kid said acidly. “I can still fucking defend myself, so don’t take another damn step.”

“Fuck, I…I’m sorry,” Derek stuttered.

“What?!” The kid’s brow crinkled. “I mean — what?! You’re fucking sorry!?” His lips thinned into a harsh line. “What, is this some kinda Hallmark movie where you’re discovering the error of your ways because you don’t want to rob a blind person?! That’s fucking condescending, man. I’ll have you know that —”

“Just, wait.” Derek interrupted what was apparently the start of a convincing argument as to why he should rob the kid after all, feeling his head start to spin. “This is — it’s a misunderstanding. I’m — I’m not robbing you. You’re — you’re safe, okay? I’m taking three steps back. Just — just let me explain.”

“Explain why you came busting into my apartment? Yeah, go right ahead, man, I can’t wait to hear this epic tale.”

Gravity’s Got Nothing on You by zosofi

“Three weeks,” Derek says.

“Still don’t want to,” Stiles says.

“I’ll pay you,” Derek says, and that… that has Stiles interested. Alf’s Antique’s may be a great job, but it’s not a high-paying job, and half of Stiles’s tuition is coming from financial aid, so…

“How much,” Stiles asks, “are we talking here? Because I know your family, dude. And it’ll be kind of awkward after.“

“My family thinks you’re some sort of fucking gift to the world,” Derek seethes, like he’s jealous, “they’ll probably be pissed at me when we break it off, so don’t worry about that. Five hundred bucks.”

“A thousand,” Stiles says, because screw ethics. Also, the Hale family is loaded. Derek can deal.

Dating Backwards by RemainNameless

Pornstars Derek and Stiles work for the same company. Derek only shoots with werewolves and Stiles only shoots with humans. That’s not going to change after they meet. It’s really not.(It might.)

Didn’t See That Coming by knittersrevolt

Stiles leaves Beacon Hills in the dust after he catches his husband cheating on him.

He finds his way to New York where he starts working for the Hale House Nursery, accidentally adopts a werewolf baby (through no fault of his own thank-you-very-much), and somehow starts training to be an Exorcist Emissary. So, in general, life was going good.

Then he hears that demons have found their way into his hometown. Can he face his inner demons and go back to save the day?

No Homo by RemainNameless

Stiles’ sophomore year starts something like this:3 FourLokos+ 1 peer-pressuring cat- 1 best bro to end all best bros= 1 Craigslist ad headline that reads “str8 dude - m4m - strictly platonic”.Derek is the fool who replies.

There’s Monsters at Home by calrissian18

“How did you get past the wards?” Derek had put them up, with Peter’s grudging assistance, after the Alpha pack had made themselves at home a few times too many.

The guy pulled a face. “You mean the wards a five-year-old girl with the mental ability of a goldfish could deconstruct?” He blinked wide eyes at Derek. “Gee, I don’t know. It’s bound to go down as one of life’s great mysteries.”

Derek despised him.

Prince Among Wolves by tylerfucklin

Looking for full day/evening sitter. 2 twin boys age 4. Must have exp. w/werewolves. Must be human. No pedophiles. No teenage girls. Pay negotiable.

Between Men and Lions by standinginanicedress

“I thought we could be friends,” Derek offers, to which Stiles gets an odd smile on his face.

“Friends,” he repeats, an odd inflection.

“Yes, friends.”

Stiles laughs, just barely. It’s more of an exhalation of breath than it is genuine mirth or anything else, and then he smiles. “I’m pretty good at friends,” he says with a tilt to his head, and Derek clears his throat and has to look away.

What’s Best For Everyone, Isn’t What’s Easy by gatergirl79

Derek is gone and Stiles is left holding the baby…well, a cheery three year old named Leah actually. While Derek searches for her mom, Stiles plays daddy. When the sour-alpha wolf returns with his ex in toe, things get strained between Stiles and Derek. Especially now that’s they’ve realized just what they mean to each other

[samoas]

All asks

(1) Do You Sleep With Your Closet Doors Open Or Closed?

closed tf 

(2) Do You Have Freckles?

uhh i have like 4 in different places on my body 

(3) Can You Whistle?

kind of. braces took my sick whistling skills away 

(4) Last Song You Listened To.

currently listening to sound check (gravity) by the gorillaz 

(5) What Is Your Favourite Colour?

hmmm there r so many that i like i love reds and oranges and deep warm colors 

(6) Relationship Status.

emotionally unavailable 

(7) What Is The Temperature Right Now?

22 degrees rn 

(8) Did You Wake Up Cranky?

kinda bc i was awoken at 7:30

(9) How Many Followers?

;-)

(10) Zodiac Sign.

leo babi

(11) What Is Your Eye Colour?

mix of blue, green, and grey 

(12) Take A Vitamin Daily?

nop but i should 

(13) Do You Sing In The Shower?

ya bc i listen to music while showering 

(14) What Books Are You Reading?

mortal instruments series 

(15) Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14.

“he had thought he knew how they felt.”

(16) Favourite Anime?

NARUTO

(17) Last Person You Cried In Front Of?

uhhhhhhhhhh does my dog count ????

(18) Do You Collect Anything?

oh ya i collect rocks and old books and dried flowers and dead butterflies and sweet things

(19) What Did You Have For Lunch?

i have not eaten that yet 

(20) Do You Dance In The Car?

depends. sometimes 

(21) Favourite Animal?

i love octopi 

(22) Do You Watch The Olympics?

nah

(23) What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed?

like 1-5 am 

(24) Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now?

ya 

(25) Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean?

ocean

(26) Favourite Tumblr Blog?

shidd i love too many 

(27) Bottled Water Or Tap Water?

bottled. not about that chlorine 

(28) What Makes You Happy?

cynthia and harry styles and flowers and snow and rocks and bugs 

(29) Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

i have no gifs on my computer but that in itself is an accurate depiction of how i feel 

(30) Do You Study Better With Or Without Music?

depends on the subject 

(31) Dogs Or Cats?

doggos but i love both 

(32) If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be?

peach

(33) PlayStation Or Xbox.

xbox bc i have never played a playstation lol 

(34) Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean?

ocean. lakes are fucking DISGUSTING i would rather swim in a puddle on the side of the road than in a lake 

(35) Do You Believe In Magic?

the magic of gays 

(36) What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing?

yellow 

(37) Can You Curl Your Tongue?

ya baby like a burrito 

(38) Do You Save Money Or Spend It?

usually save but i spend sometimes

(39) Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You?

yes a blanket, a bra, makeup

(40) Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now?

harry styles and 1d as always 

(41) Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly?

they have always tended to land on me so they catch me 

(42) Are You Easily Influenced By Other People?

im influenced by people i love like my bff and my krush but i could not care less about what other people think i do what i wanna do regardless 

(43) Do You Have Strange Dreams?

all the fuckn time thanx zoloft 

(44) Do You Like Going On Airplanes?

yes 

(45) Name One Movie That Made You Cry.

one direction: this is us 

(46) Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds?

peanuts can suck my sweet asshole 

(47) If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be?

harry styles front row seats 

(48) Are You A Picky Eater?

nop

(49) Are You A Heavy Sleeper?

uhhh im average i think 

(50) Do You Fear Thunder / Lightning?

no i love it 

(51) Do You Like To Read / Write?

yes and yes 

(52) Do You Like Your Music Loud?

depends on the mood 

(53) Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents?

carve pumpkins bc i suck at wrappign 

(54) Put Your Music On Shuffle, What Is The First Song That Came Up?

dunes by alabama shakes 

(55) What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather)

winter baby

(56)What Are You Craving Right Now?

physical affection 

(57) Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed.

no thx

(58) What Is Your Gender?

she / they 

(59) Coffee Or Tea?

i usually say i cant choose but i think we all know its coffee 

(60) Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About?

no im on break 

(61) What Is Your Sexuality?

gaey

(62) Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning?

no lol

(63) Favourite Pokemon?

eevee

(64) Favourite Social Media?

tungle 

(65) What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories?

gross but i use it anyways 

(66) Do You Get Homesick?

yes but only when im in my house ???????

(67) Are You A Virgin?

unfortunately 

(68) What Shampoo And Conditioner Are You Using Right Now?

some coconut shit 

(69) If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free?

motel room. not about to get murdered 

(70) Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life?

no dad is gon

(71)  Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters?

whatever horror movie is next

(72) Do You Miss Your Ex?

lol no i can finally say that

(73) What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now?

dont have one 

(74) What Eye Colour Do You Find Sexiest?

every girl ive had a crush on has had brown eyes so i guess i love brown eyes 

(75) Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set?

YES i fucking LOVE TO SWING 

(76) What Was The Last Thing You Ate?

gravy biscuit 

(77) What Games Do You Have On Your Phone?

none 

(78) Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not?

uhhhh yes ???? theyre dying??

(79) Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?

i have before

(80) Stalked Someone On A Social Network?

bro who hasnt 

(81) Do You Like Meeting New People?

kind of i have social anxiety 

(82) Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them.

yes i do but im too lazy to take a pic 

(83) Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?

closed i need to be safe 

(84) What Are Three Things You Did Today?

worked with my mom, washed my hair, put on makuep 

(85) What Do You Wear To Bed?

big fat hoodie and shorts 

(86) List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now.

oh my god it would take housrs  i have so mcuh 

(87) Are You A Day Or Night Person?

night time 

(88) List All Of Your Video Games On Your Phone, Console Etc.

i have the xbox and i have a lot of CoD and we got minecraft and some football game 

(89) Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

i had a dream about my krush like,, 3 months ago and we kissed in the sunset lol 

(90) Favourite Soda Drink?

disgusting. i love dr pepper tho 

(91) What Sounds Are Your Favourite?

thunder, crunchy slime, harry styles speaking

(92) Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More?

jeans 

(93) How Do You Look Right Now?

appropriately dressed and cleaned up for a job interview 

(94) Name Something That Relaxes You.

coffee 

(95) What Tattoo Do You Want?

“i love you” in my great gmas handwriting and either “all the love” or “girl almighty” in harrys handwriting 

(96) Favourite YouTuber?

frick idk i dont rly wathc youtube 

[bizzaro-stormy-blog]

Like, Questions and Stuff?

eeeeeee i dont think ive ever been tagged in one of these so thanks @latenightgaymer you are the bees knees!!

Where do you currently live? 

portland oregon

Where would you prefer to live if given the option, and why?

oregon is my home, i used to have a dream of moving back to seattle and buying back the house my grandfather built but the city has changed and so have i.

 the weather is usually perfect here (we have had waaaaay too much sun lately) theres green literally everywhere and it feels alive. 

i have always thought about alaska for the same reasons + snow

Shoe size?

14 us its hard to find cheap and nice shoes in my size

Is there a movie/book/show/game you’re looking forward to? What about it has you most excited?

i really want to borrow the scarlet gospels from my friend i know its not a new book but i want to read it super bad, also comic books from another friend (too many to list honestly but Trees, Wytches and the wicked + the Divine are at the front) id also like to read a physical copy of kill six billion demons when i can afford it.

 im super excited for the second seasons of westworld, legion and american gods aswell as the next seasons of Killjoys, the magicians, archer, my hero acadamia, steven universe, shameless, van helsing, its always sunny, RPDR and like all of the netflix shows, im also looking forward to the rest of the seasons of the good place, the orville and the mick...i might watch too much tv. 

im super excited for the .hack gu remaster, the last of us 2, shadow of the colossus remaster, cyberpunk 2077 and bloodborne 2 as unlikely as it is (miyazaki grant us a sequel as you once did for vacuous darksouls)

Wine, or hard liquor?  What is one of your preferred drinks?

i dont drink, thats not to say i havent just that it took soo much for me to feel even a tiny bit light headed im pretty sure i cant get drunk and dont see the point. im a water man and on the occasions i have soda dr pepper and root beer are king, if not lemonade i guess

Physical touch, do you enjoy it?  What’s your favorite spot, what spot do you not want to be touched?

im a bit weird here, i tend to recoil and flinch if im touched (probably a result of growing up with an older brother who used his size to be physically controling and abusive aswell as various other people in my life who have treated me as a punching bag) especially around my chest i tend to curl up and get defensive (again probably the result of an older sister who thinks twisting my nipples so hard they bleed is an apropriate answer to a disagreement).

on the other hand i am very physically affectionate i love to hug people, touch people, hold people, bite people (not in the sexy nibble way so much as the "bro did you just fucking bite me?!" way) anything really if im around other physically affectionate people which is kinda rare as there are like 2 physically affectionate people in my life and i only see one on a regular basis

Go into your YouTube history and provide the link to the 7th video in the list.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xbq01mubZqc

though i had to open a video to get to my history so i guess its technically

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rnq3VBQu_kI

What was the last song you listened to?

This Song By RAC ft Rostam

Do you have any thoughts on ‪Nick Jonas‬?

Who?

Water or silicone based?

well gee im a water based life form myself but id be interested in meeting a silicone based life form :p

The most illicit controlled substance you’ve partaken in?

does doctor prescribed Vicodin count?

If you could get your friends/family to watch one specific gay movie, which one would it be?

i would have to say closet monster though i think of that less as a specifically gay movie and more as a delve into the stress and pressure of someone transitioning into adulthood coming from a broken, dysfunctional and traumatic childhood, its honestly such a great movie.

 now a movie where the plot is specifically gay? the weekend, its simple sweet and is easily relatable for most people, honestly i love this movie because it doesn't over dramatize a relationship and makes the characters feel real,

orientation aside its just a good human story

Do you listen to podcasts?  If so do you listen to them while you’re doing something else?

not often its almost always a one off or the savagelovecast, i used to listen to professor blastoff regularly but stopped for some reason, usually im reading or writing and want something not as easy to zone out to as music and not as distracting as silence

What do you do on a Sunday?

not much save check for manga (i know im a neeerd) or webtoon updates which usually ends with me frustratedly remembering Tower Of God updates on Mondays

Birth sign and zodiac?  What do you like most about both, what do you like least.  If you could pick which would you prefer?

ok so in advanced astrology is not much more than a novelty for me and i generally believe signs and what not to hold no sway over real life, i do find it interesting how they can sometimes get portions of peoples personalities and lives right but i would rather attribute that to the trillions of factors that went into the conception and birth of a person before the position of far away stellar bodies (ie babies born 9 months after valentines day probably have romantic parents so they themselves are romantics? idk dude).

that said i am a Taurus and my zodiac sign is the dragon i love them and would never change them, while i dont believe they hold any greater meaning to me i do feel the bull and the dragon represent me more as symbols of myself, though strangely i cant seem to escape them (along with crows and bears...idk dude my conscious and unconscious worlds are strange).

In front of my salad?

Bitch if you would stop breaking into my house to eat your salads you wouldn't be seeing anything you dont want to.

Last book or comic you enjoyed?

uuh physical book? shiiiiit its been a minute but it was ether a david sedaris book or a reread of the water mirror series. 

comic books? old man logan was amazing and i always reread Dango Sunshine occasionally. 

if webcomics count then kill six billion demons, a better place, avas demon, paranatural, gunnerkrigg court, cassiopeia quinn, unsounded,  gloomverse, mokepon and i just reread both Vibe and JUNE (if you havent read any of these please check them out they are amazing)

A kink or fetish you have,  can you explain how it became one for you?

uhmmm i dont know dude im pretty vanilla i dont have allot (read any) experience so im pretty open to trying anything really, i dont know dude even if im outwardly an asshole sometimes when it comes down to it so long as you arent forcing yourself upon someone or something unable (unaware, underdeveloped or unable to fully understand what it means) to give consent im open to you and will atleast try to understand you and your kink and maybe participate with you if thats your goal....

....ok so i might have one fetish? tattoos are hot af that is all...

Supply the link to either an image or video you think will bring a chuckle to those following you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0c29Cu_8bQ

imma just tag yous guys cause you are the collective best

@sbot12 @bonefireheart9 @that1cameraguy @incredible91 @dammitcat @mapcus