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our-time-is-now · 4 years ago

Text

June 23, 2019 (1): Zelda and the future

(previous play)

You can find more information about the authors, translators, content warning and additional information about the plays in the pinned post on our blog.

Sunday, 4:12 pm:

David: *they planned on meeting at Carlos' to play video games because his parents are on holiday and he's got the place to himself* *is a little proud that they're only 12 minutes late when they finally arrive at the house Carlos lives in* *gets off his bike and grins at Matteo* Only 12 minutes late! We're getting better! *briefly looks at the house because he's never been at Carlos' place and then back at Matteo who is locking his bike* *laughs quietly when he sees Jonas coming around the corner on his bike and says to Matteo* And we're not even the last ones for a change! *then can already hear Jonas: "Oh, crap! I thought I'd make it before you two..."* *shrugs and grins* I don't know what's going on today, either... *waits for Jonas to lock up his bike as well and watches how he first hits Matteo and then him on the shoulder in greeting and hears him say: "Na, Mister David Schreibner!? Have you bought a frame, yet?!"* *grins and somehow likes it that he remembers* *shakes his head and murmurs* Not yet...

Matteo: *laughs when David is so proud* *shrugs* Oh, they should just stop making such a big fuss all the time... *locks his bike and gets up again* *also laughs when he sees Jonas* Ha! *shakes his head* He knows exactly what's going on... *imitates David* "Come on, Matteo... let's just be on time only once, Matteo... you can also go to the bathroom there..." *grins when Jonas congratulates David again* We already made copies... I'll get a frame! *then goes to the front door with the two and rings the bell*

David: *gives Matteo the secretary's-office-look when Matteo imitates him and then shrugs* It worked... *laughs quietly* Well, a little... *nods when Matteo tells him about the copies and the frame and then follows them to the front door and up the stairs to the second floor after they get buzzed in* *sees Abdi standing at the apartment door and as he fistbumps them in greeting hears him say: "He's not really in a good mood today..."* *lifts one eyebrow in worry when he returns the greeting and doesn't ask because he'll probably find out soon enough, anyways* *hears Jonas announce in a good mood: "Oh, we'll soon change that... where is he? Living room?"* *sees Abdi nod and follows the others through the hallway into the living room*

Matteo: *greets Abdi and then grimaces a little in worry when he hears his words* *whispers to David* We should have brought Hans' super sweet booze, after all... *then follows Jonas and Abdi into the living room* Hey, dude... *there's some bustle while they all greet Carlos and then somehow find their seats on the sofa, the armchair and the floor* *him and David managed to get the armchair while Jonas and Carlos are sitting on the small sofa and Abdi's on the floor* *notices that Carlos looks a little dejected and thinks that a sledgehammer approach is the best method* Why are you pulling such a face? What's wrong? *notices Jonas look at him depreciatively but only shrugs one shoulder*

David: *has put his arm around Matteo after they managed to get the armchair and after he greeted Carlos* *looks at Carlos a little more closely and thinks that he really does look quite frustrated* *then hears Matteo's question and finds it pretty direct* *briefly draws up his eyebrows in skepticism and then looks at Carlos scrutinizingly* *sees him sigh briefly and then shake his head: "Ey, yesterday Kiki told me that she got her acceptance letter for university..."* *hears Jonas: "But that's great! What's so bad about it that it ruins your mood like that? You have your apprenticeship, she got accepted to university so everything's great, isn't it?"* *sees Carlos look at Jonas with serious expression and then simply says: "Halle!"* *sees Abdi nod and repeat: "Halle!", as if he wanted to make sure everyone really gets it* *can understand now why Carlos is so down because it will most likely come down to a long-distance relationship and asks* How far away is Halle again? 150 km? *hears Carlos answer: "171"* *nods in understanding and murmurs* Fuck... *hears Carlos: "Tell me about it, bro..."*

Matteo: *is sitting partly on the armrest and partly on the armchair leaning onto David* *listens to the boys and then looks from one to the other a little confused* But that's only two hours by car... *sees Jonas look at him depreciatively again* *sees Abdi shake his head and hears him say: "What do you mean only?"* *hears Carlos sigh and hears him say: "That means I'll only see her on weekends and probably not even every weekend"* *wonders what's so bad about not constantly seeing Kiki and slightly shrugs his shoulders* *sees Jonas shake his head and hears him say: "Sorry, Brudi, but I'm really amazed that you of all people don't understand that..."* *slightly grimaces in his direction* *then hears Abdi: "That's actually true, you get crazy even when you're only 1.7 km away from David"* *humpfs quietly and then understands Carlos a little bit, after all, he just can’t think of Kiki as Kiki* *nods* Okay, that's true... but... *looks at Carlos* ... what does she even say about it? If you both want it, then you'll manage.

David: *feels a tiny sting when Matteo says that it would only be two hours by car and stiffens a little when he wonders if Matteo really wouldn't mind it if they suddenly were 171 km apart* *nods at Carlos' words and tries to ignore the sting and Matteo's words because now it's not really about them but about Carlos and Kiki* *then hears Jonas' words to Matteo and on the one hand has to smile a little about them but on the other hand finds it somehow strange that Jonas seems to understand the problem better than Matteo does* *then has to grin slightly at Abdi's assumption and briefly looks at Matteo who somehow seems to understand only now what it's about* *then hears Carlos: "Well Kiki says that it's her chance and that she'll definitely accept the spot. I mean, I can somehow understand her, she really wants to study but she acts as if it somehow would be... I don’t know... as if it were absolutely okay for her that we'll barely see each other..."* *clears his throat and asks* Isn't there a possibility for her to start in Halle for now, but then switch to Berlin after a semester? She can also study psychology in Berlin... *hears Jonas: "Exactly! Once you got accepted somewhere, it's easier to switch... I mean even if the numerus clausus in Berlin is actually higher than in Halle, the chance of getting accepted is higher once you've already been accepted to the course of study!"* *nods in agreement to Jonas words and says* Then it would really only be a temporary long-distance relationship... so maybe one year instead of three or four years.

Matteo: *nods in affirmation at everything that is being said* And look, you've already been through quite a lot and always stuck together... then you'll get through this, as well. *sees Jonas nod enthusiastically* *sees Carlos tilt his head back forth: "But what if she wants to stay in Halle? If she likes it so much there?"* *says very decisively* Then you'll get through this, as well! *has realized now that apparently the right way is to encourage Carlos and not belittle the situation itself* *sees Carlos look at him and hears him ask: "Would you get through this?"* *grimaces slightly* *but then gives him an honest answer* I wouldn't... but I'm also not as strong as you. *grins slightly* Hey, Halle really isn't thaaat far away. My mum used to have a friend from Halle, she spontaneously came to visit us quite often... that's quite doable, even by train.

David: *nods at what Matteo says and thinks it's good that he encourages Carlos now* *adds* And even if she wants to stay there... then you'll just do the three years of your apprenticeship and then you'll find a good job there! *then hears Carlos' question to Matteo and is glad that Matteo answers and that it seems to be enough for Carlos* *is pretty sure that he wouldn't be able to get through it but doesn't want to demotivate Carlos with it* *adds to Matteo's words* Besides there's semester break! I guess Kiki will be in Berlin then, anyways. She doesn't only have you here, but also her family and her friends! *hears Jonas: "Exactly! Halle really isn't that bad! Just imagine if it were Munich or Flensburg or somewhere like that... then it wouldn't even be worth going there over the weekend because it's so far away!"* *sees Carlos shrug and hears him say with his head hanging low: "I'm just afraid that she'll like it there so much... she'll meet new people... she'll meet new guys... they might be cooler than me..."* *then hears Abdi: "Don't talk like that, dude! No one is cooler than you and Kiki knows that!"*

Matteo: *nods at what Abdi says* Exactly! You're the coolest, man, and Kiki knows that! *sees Jonas look at him surprised and only shrugs one shoulder* Look, thing is... if you prophet doom and gloom from the get-go then it won't work out. *sees Jonas nod and hears him say: "Exactly. We are going to have a nice evening now, you are going to relax a little and tomorrow you're going to get together with her again and you'll talk about it again. It's going to work out!"* *nods again and grins* And now go get the beer and then we'll distract you a little, ok?

David: *has to smile slightly when Matteo is talking about doom and gloom* *has experience with that* *sees Carlos nod at Jonas' suggestion and hears him say: "Okay, maybe you're right!"* *grins slightly and says* I'm really sure we are right! *sees Carlos pick himself up when he hears Matteo's words and then hears him say to Abdi: "I've also got chips in the cabinet over there. Go get them, Brudi!"* *sees Carlos leave the living room to get beer from somewhere and once he's left the room hears Jonas murmur: "That situation really sucks... I can really understand him..."* *nods and quietly says* Me too... but it's probably more helpful to encourage him than pull him down... *also wraps his other arm around Matteo and squeezes him close* *briefly hides his face on his shoulder and sighs quietly when he thinks about the fact that their future somehow isn't really certain, either* *is really afraid that he'll also only get accepted somewhere outside of Berlin and that Matteo will offer to move away with him because he really doesn't want to ask that of him*

Matteo: *nods at Jonas' words* Yeah it is... *also nods at David's words* We'll distract him a little, I think that's good... *wraps his arm around David when he squeezes him close* *quickly presses a kiss to his hair and whispers* Hey, that's not us, ok? *apparently didn't whisper quietly enough because he can hear Abdi laugh and say: "Nothing could tear you apart, anyways!"* *only shrugs one shoulder at that comment and doesn't say anything because Carlos returns with a six-pack beer* *sees Carlos start to open and hand out the bottles* *looks at David* I can also get you something else? *hears Carlos laugh a little: "Caution, caution, the alcohol police is here again. Mister Schreibner mustn’t exceed the alcohol level of 0.01!"*

David: *has to smile at the words Matteo whispers to him and nods slightly but still can't quite turn off his thoughts on that topic* *hears Abdi and grins slightly* *was just about to answer him that he would probably chain himself to Matteo if somebody were to try it when Carlos returns to the living room and starts opening the bottles* *was just about to decline Matteo's offer and grab a beer from Carlos but then hears Carlos' words and thinks it's somehow unfair to Matteo – even if it's only meant as a joke. But when Matteo is worried about him because of that that then it's only something between Matteo and him and the others shouldn't really meddle in that* *therefore changes his mind, looks at Matteo, smiles slightly and says* That would be nice, I don't really feel like beer today... *hears Jonas laugh and Carlos look pretty surprised: "Ey, come on, Brudi, at least one!"* *shakes his head and laughs quietly* Have been quite a lot of "at least one beers" lately... don’t want it to become a habit...

Matteo: *looks a little dumbfounded when he hears Carlos' comment* *didn't really mean it like that and just wanted to offer David an alternative* *is a little surprised when David actually agrees with him and sits up immediately* *looks at Carlos* We're too old to care for peer pressure, aren't we? *gets up and asks Carlos* Your glasses are still where they used to be? *sees Carlos nod and open his mouth but interrupts him* Thanks, I'll just go help myself from the fridge. *leaves the living room to get a glass and something else for David to drink from the kitchen* *therefore doesn't hear how Carlos asks David: "Does that really not annoy you?"*

David: *releases Matteo from his grasp when he immediately tries to get up and grins slightly when he hears his comment about peer pressure* *briefly looks after Matteo gratefully and then hears Carlos' question* *at first looks at him a little astonished but then laughs quietly* What? That my boyfriend worries about me!? *hears Carlos: "Well, but it's still kinda your decision, isn't it?"* *nods and shrugs one shoulder* Sure. But he's not forbidding anything... he simply suggests alternatives. *hears Carlos again: "It would still really annoy me..."* *thinks that it would probably annoy him if Matteo started to argue about it, but so far, Matteo has always let him do his thing when he decided to have alcohol and has always accepted his decision* *then hears Jonas say to Carlos: "Imagine a doctor had told Kiki that she shouldn't drink too much alcohol... and she would still drink with the girls all the time... then you would also say something at some point, wouldn't you?"* *sees Carlos think about it and before he says: "Yes, but that's something completely different... but if Kiki would do that with me, I'd tell her something!"* *can't really believe what he just heard and laughs out loud* Why? Because you're the man and she's the woman? So much for equality!

Matteo/mostly the boys: *has found a glass and is now trying to decide between the different juices in the fridge* *Jonas laughs and nods in affirmation at David's words: "Yes, Carlos, that's really macho-y of you"* *Carlos shakes his head: "No, I'm just saying... you're old enough, you can decide for yourself what you want... it's exhausting if he always says something!"* *Jonas shakes his head: "He doesn't forbid him anything. He just worries. And like I said, I would bet quite a lot that if it were Kiki you'd be even more persistent."* *Abdi sighs and quietly says: "I'd love to have a girlfriend who worries about me."* *comes back into the living room with a glass and a few bottles under each arm* I didn't know what you wanted so I brought water, apple juice, orange juice and pineapple juice... *looks at David questioningly and only then realizes that everyone stopped talking the moment he came into the room* Should I leave again?

David: *quietly laughs at Carlos' words again* But that's exactly what I'm doing! I decide for myself! *then shakes his head when Carlos says that Matteo is exhausting, groans and leans back in resignation* *nods at Jonas' words, smiles slightly at Abdi's words and then looks up when Matteo enters the living room loaded with bottles* *smiles at him lovingly and takes two of the bottles from him to put them on the coffee table* *quietly murmurs "thanks" to him* *immediately shakes his head when Matteo asks if he should leave again and reaches his arms out for him* *somehow really feels like protecting him after the things Carlos has just said* *hears Abdi answer Matteo's question honestly: "No, you can stay! Carlos just thought you were annoying!"* *looks at Abdi a little deprecatingly and hears Jonas laugh: "Yes, but we were actually done with the topic... right?!"* *sees Jonas look at everyone a little provokingly and nods immediately* I agree!

Matteo: *puts the other two bottles and the glass down on the coffee table and thinks that David will just help himself* *grins slightly when David reaches out for him and immediately gets back to his previous spot next to him, leans against him and takes David's hand* *laughs slightly at Abdi's answer and looks at Carlos* Is that so? *sees Carlos simply shrug but he doesn't give an explanation* *then hears that they are apparently done with the topic and that he apparently won't get an explanation* Let's just see how annoying he'll find me when I finish him off at Mario Kart! *hears Jonas laugh and Abdi say: "Carlos actually wanted to play Zelda!"* *grins slightly at the mention of Zelda and remembers David and him talking about it but then also remembers what happened afterwards* *holds onto David and wraps both arms around him tightly* Don't run away.

David: *puts one arm around Matteo when he sits back down next to him and entwines their fingers with a smile when Matteo takes his hand* *is actually glad that they are apparently done with the topic, that no one mentions it again and that Matteo then suggests they start to play* *when he hears Abdi's comment he sees Jonas look at Carlos and hears him ask: "How far are you now, Brudi?"* *sees Carlos get up and turn on the TV and the console and hears him answer: "I reached level 28 yesterday..."* *sees Jonas nod appreciatively and in that moment feels Matteo's arms tighten around him and hears his words* *grins slightly and presses a kiss to his forehead* *murmurs quietly* Don't worry... those times are behind me... *then hears Abdi: "Ey, is our character still saved?! Then maybe we can continue playing with that one..."* *sees Carlos nod: "Of course!" and hears him say while sitting back on the couch: "So, I'd say I start because my day sucked the most!"* *grins slightly and carefully pulls away from Matteo's hug* *indicates with his head that he wants to pour himself something to drink and spontaneously decides to have apple juice* *leans back again with his glass, puts his arm back around Matteo, takes a sip and then watches Carlos as he starts the game*

Matteo: *grins slightly when David says that those times are behind him* Good... *squeezes him again and then lets go of him so that he can pour himself something to drink* *reaches for his beer and also takes a sip* *Carlos gets into position and starts the game* No, man, Carlos, pass him from the left and take the axe! Take the axe, man! *shakes his head when Carlos doesn't listen to him* *murmurs* Every time... *hears Jonas laugh when Carlos doesn't manage to pass the opponent: "You should have taken the axe"* *only shakes his head and leans back against David* *murmurs "they are all stupid" and buries his face on David's neck*

David: *grins when Matteo starts giving advice to Carlos and when he – probably out of protest – ignores them and laughs quietly when Carlos does screw up* *grins again when Matteo leans against him, presses a quick kiss to his forehead and starts to card through his hair in consolation* *murmurs back* And you being the expert here... *then hears Abdi say: "Ey, but we don't do 'everyone has three lives' right? That would take forever with some of us..."* *sees Jonas nod: "I agree... everyone plays for 15 minutes?"* *nods in agreement and says* Sounds good! *then sees Carlos try the opponent another time and this time really take the axe and get close to the opponent from the left* *nudges Matteo and quietly says* You see... he's able to learn, after all! *then hears Carlos while still staring at the screen: "I can hear you, by the way! You can talk big in a minute when it's your turn!"* *laughs quietly* *just like Matteo he has already played that part of the game and doesn't think that he'll have a lot of difficulty*

Matteo: *closes his eyes when David cards through his hair* *pouts overdramatically and nods* I am. *nods at the suggestion of 15 minutes with his eyes still closed* *opens them when he hears David's comment and turns his head slightly to see what Carlos is doing* *pffs slightly at Carlos' comment* You're not getting any more tips from me... *then hears Jonas laugh and hears him ask: "How far are you, Luigi? Still 31?"* *nods* Yes, I haven't played in a while...

David: *sees Abdi grin at Matteo's comment and sees him look over at them: "Have been busy with other things, have you?"* *directs his secretary's-office-look at Abdi and then looks at Matteo for a moment to check on him, his hand still in Matteo's hair* *until now hasn't really noticed that Matteo really isn't playing Zelda anymore and briefly wonders if it has something to do with his disappearance after the sandwich-feast and quietly says to him* We could have played that yesterday... *then hears Jonas comment on Carlos' game: "Oh man, Brudi, I'd really like to know how you even got this far – you've missed another diamond mine! Go back again!"* *hears Carlos: "Huh? Where?!" and then Jonas' description of where Carlos is supposed to go* *looks back at the screen for a moment, takes another sip of apple juice and puts the glass down on the floor next to him to not have to move too much and to not ruin the comfortable position he and Matteo are in*

Matteo: *grins back at Abdi and shrugs* *then looks at David when he hears his quiet comment and shakes his head* Then it wouldn't be original anymore... *listens to Jonas and Carlos and is glad that he has stopped giving advice to Carlos* *then hears Abdi announce: "Your 15 minutes are over, who's next?"* *hears Carlos say: "David, I want to see how good he is..."* *grumbles slightly because that means that he has to move*

David: *grins slightly at Matteo's comment and quietly says* It wasn't anyways... I've stayed with you, after all... *briefly buries his nose in Matteo's hair* *then hears that he's supposed to play next and nods* *pulls away from Matteo and scoots from the armchair down on the floor to better reach the controller that Carlos is holding out to him* *hasn't played the game in forever and it takes some time for him to get used to the controller again and to figure out at which point in the game they are at the moment* *hears Carlos: "Oh man, Brudi, if you're also better at video games than us then we won't invite you anymore..."* *grins without looking away from the screen* Don't worry... I play video games way too rarely for that... *really screws up a jump in that exact moment and has to go back quite a bit to repeat a part of the way*

Matteo: *grins slightly and nods* True... *stretches out on the armchair when David scoots down to the floor to play* *laughs at Carlos' comment and shakes his head* That I want to see... *then hears Carlos laugh and sees him shake his head slightly: "No, no, just kidding... I would miss you too much!"* *sees Carlos stick his tongue out at him and rolls his eyes* *suddenly Abdi is standing next to him: "Ey, Luigi, could we go to the kitchen for a moment to talk?"* *is pretty surprised and glances at Jonas in confusion who only shrugs* Umm, yeah, sure... *pulls himself up and follows Abdi to the kitchen* *looks at Abdi expectantly who at first beats around the bush before eventually saying: "Yeah, man, I don’t want to annoy the others with it all the time, but I constantly have to think about Sam..."* *is a little surprised that Abdi has picked him for this conversation instead of Jonas* Dude, I don't know if I can help you with that... *sees Abdi nod: "Sure you can, man, you didn't give up with David, either..."* *slightly shakes his head* Well... but that was somehow a little different... have you already told her? *sees Abdi nod carefully: "At the Abiball... but she wasn't really that enthusiastic..." *suddenly feels sorry for Abdi and shrugs slightly* That sucks, man, I'm sorry... but I really can't help you much with that... *hears Abdi sigh and ask: "So you don't think that I should keep trying?"* *shrugs* Dunno... no? I mean it doesn't really sound that great... but maybe you should rather ask Jonas... or David... I'm sure they're better at that then me...

David: *only briefly looks away from the screen when Abdi and Matteo leave the living room and continues to play because he really has to concentrate* Arghs... how do I change weapons again!? *randomly presses several buttons* *hears Jonas: "triangle and circle!"* *nods and does that* Thanks... *then hears Carlos: "Ey, what was that about!? What does Abdi want from Matteo now?! /I/ am his bro..."* *grins slightly and concentrates on the game and absentmindedly says* I thought we were all bros... *hears Jonas: "Probably something only Matteo can help him with... and what he's obviously embarrassed about in front of us... but that's okay..."* *agrees with Jonas* *wins over some opponents and moves a level up* *pumps his fist into the air and grins* *sees Carlos look stunned: "Ey, I can't believe it!"* *shrugs and says with a grin* You put in the groundwork for it... *continues playing and eventually hears Carlos: "They have been gone for quite some time..."* *only shrugs and hears Jonas laugh: "One could almost think that you're jealous..." and Carlos immediately answers: "Nonsense!"*

Matteo: *sees Abdi shake his head: "No, I want to know what you think..."* *hums slightly and thinks about it again* *then looks at Abdi and slowly says* I think, maybe... you simply have to make a decision... either you talk to her again, tell her that you need a clear statement and then you'll see what she says... or you keep waiting... but waiting forever can also suck... *shrugs slightly* I mean, to have an unrequited crush is really... exhausting... *sees Abdi nod and hears him say: "You're right. I simply have to make a decision."* *nods* Sorry that I can't be of more help... *sees Abdi shake his head: "You helped. Thanks."* Okay... do we wanna go back? *sees Abdi nod, pats him on the back and goes back into the living room with him*

David: *hears Abdi and Matteo come back to the living room but doesn't really look up from the screen but only grins slightly and says* You were sorely missed! *hears Abdi: "By you?!"* *laughs quietly and now briefly glances at Matteo, after all* From me, too... *then hears Jonas: "No, Carlos was jealous..." and Carlos: "I wasn't you ass!" and Abdi again: "Isn't anybody checking the time here?! Why is David still playing?"* *shrugs and says with a grin* Because I'm simply good... *kills another opponent but then hits pause* *leans back against the armchair, basically between Matteo's legs, who has sat back down again* *holds the controller out* Who wants to play next?

Matteo: *laughs* Don't worry, Carlos, I didn't steal him from you... *sits back down on the armchair and moves his leg a little apart when David leans against the armchair* *sees Jonas take the controller and scoot around a little* Finish the level, dude *hears Jonas laugh: "I'll do my best!"* *leans forward to grab his beer from the table and presses a kiss to David's temple on his way* *leans back and notices Carlos watching him* *lifts his eyebrows in question* Hm?

David: *hands the controller over to Jonas and watches as he begins to play* *makes some space when Matteo leans forward to grab his beer and smiles when he kisses him on the temple* *leans his head against Matteo's leg when he sits back again* *hears Matteo's "hm?" and sees Carlos shake his head: "Nothing!"* *notices that Carlos still doesn't seem to look satisfied but now turns to Abdi instead: "How are you, Brudi? Everything okay"* *has to grin slightly because he somehow finds it adorable that Carlos really seems to be jealous but doesn't comment on it to not annoy Carlos any further*

Matteo: *nods slightly amused when Carlos says that it's nothing and he then immediately asks Abdi* *sees Abdi slowly nod and hears him say: "Yeah, yeah, everything okay..."* *thinks that this doesn’t help much right now but can't really do anything about it at the moment* *slightly nudges David with his foot* *waits for him to look up and then only grins* *then hears Jonas yell "Yeesss" and quickly looks over to see that he has defeated a big opponent* Neat! *then hears Carlos ask Abdi again: "There's something wrong, just spit it out" and Abdi's answer: "Man, Brudi, everything's okay, I just have to think about a few things."* *sees Carlos face darken: "I think that's really retarded that you won't tell me what's going on."*

David: *looks up at Matteo when he nudges him with his foot and grins back, but then also looks over to Jonas and nods appreciatively when he sees what opponent he has defeated* *tries to ignore Carlos' and Abdi's conversation even though he doesn't really like it that Carlos won't accept that Abdi apparently doesn't want to talk about it with him right now* *but then draws up his eyebrows when Carlos uses "retarded" once again and sits up a little* *looks at him a little angrily* Man Carlos! *sees him look at him blankly and slightly shakes his head* Sucks! You wanted to say sucks instead of retarded! *hears Jonas say in confusion: "Did I miss something?!" and Abdi answer shortly: "Yes...." and Carlos' annoyed: "Retarded... sucks... that's all the same!"* *groans and laughs drily because Carlos really doesn't seem to understand* But it's not! *really wonders if it's worth arguing about it again or if it's no use anyways* *leans back but then sits up again and looks at Carlos* Just think about what you're saying. So everyone that sucks is retarded? Every retarded person sucks!?

Matteo: *grimaces slightly when David gets annoyed* *somehow understands him but thinks that Carlos simply can't be changed in that matter* *sees Carlos shake his head in confusion when he hears David's explanation* *then hears Jonas who has obviously paused the game: "Well, I think David is right. Maybe you should think a little more about what kind of words you use, Carlos."* *sees Carlos look a little helpless and hears him say: "Matteo also says retarded!"* *looks at him very indignantly* Hello? I don't... and besides, I'm not your protective shield in this!

David: *looks at Jonas gratefully when he is on his side but still wonders why no one in the friend group has addressed this topic in the past* *pulls up his eyebrows when Carlos pulls Matteo into this and laughs quietly – also about Matteo defending himself* And even if Matteo would also say it, then I would be just as annoyed... that's not an excuse. *slightly shakes his head* *then hears Carlos defend himself: "Ey, the word is simply stuck... I don't even really think about it..."* *hears Jonas again: "What I said, Brudi: Just think about it before speaking!"* *sees Carlos look between him and Jonas, eventually lift his hands in defense and hears him say: "Okay, okay, if it's soooo important to you then I'll just say sucks from now on..."* *still doesn't think that Carlos understood what this is about but still nods and leans back again* *sees Jonas start the game again and hears Carlos add: "But Matteo really also says it! You have to pay attention to it..."* *suppresses a grin and crosses his arms in front of his chest* *reaches one hand up and searches for Matteo's fingers*

Matteo: *looks at Carlos and lifts his eyebrows at David's words as if trying to say "you see, there's no point"* *only shakes his head at the rest of the conversation* *also thinks that Carlos doesn't really realize what it's about* *then hears Carlos pull him in again* Dude! Stop /sucking/ so much* *emphasizes "sucking" extra and sees Carlos grimace at him* *only shows him the middle finger and then reaches for David's outstretched hand* *entwines his fingers with David's and squeezes them for a moment* *then hears Jonas say: "I gotta pee. Who wants to play?"* *sees him hold up the controller and points at Abdi with his free hand*

David: *grins again at Matteo's choice of words, but then puts the topic behind him for today* *then smiles when Matteo entwines their fingers and with his free hand reaches for his apple juice to take a sip* *is glad that Matteo doesn't jump at the chance to play after Jonas and he therefore doesn't have to move* *puts his glass back down, leans his head against Matteo's leg again and relaxes* *watches Abdi take the controller and hears him negotiate: "Ey but your four minutes are wasted then, right? You can't add them next round!"* *sees Jonas grin at Abdi: "You can have them!" and Abdi beam: "Really?" and Carlos' complaint: "Ey, new rules have to be voted on!"* *only grins when Jonas only says: "I'm in favor!" and disappears to the toilet* *sees Carlos look at him and Matteo expectantly and shrugs* *laughs quietly* I really don't care... can I abstain from voting?

Matteo: *laughs at the discussion and says* I'm in favor of us discussing this for four more minutes* *sees Carlos shake his head: "You're really annoying today, Florenzi."* *laughs* Oh, last names, now I'm scared! *slightly tilts his head and shrugs* Okay, okay, I'm against it... whatever Carlos is saying is true... *takes the last sip of his beer* But only if you get me another beer... *grins because Abdi has already started to play and no one really paid attention to when exactly he started*

David: *follows the discussion with a grin but is too relaxed to participate in it* *instead watches Abdi who has already started to play* *but then hears Carlos say to Matteo: "I'll do that in a minute, we first have to resolve this! David, you have to make a decision! We're at a tie!"* *groans* *then hears Carlos add amusedly: "I knew that a fifth Brudi would one day come in handy"* *has to grin but then says to Carlos without looking away from Abdi's game* Have you really thought about being against it? What if I wanted to give you 10 minutes of my time later? Then you couldn't even accept them... *briefly glances at Carlos and sees him think about it and eventually skeptically say: "Yes but you won't do that anyways... right?"* *shrugs and grins* Who knows!? *looks back at the screen where nothing exciting is happening right now* *hears Carlos: "I'll just go get beer..."*

Matteo: *listens to David's and Carlos' discussion* *has to suppress a laugh when David turns the tables* *then sees Carlos disappear into the kitchen and leans down to press a kiss to David's cheek* You're evil! *laughs* I like it... *then hears Abdi: "No flirting and making out now, I have to concentrate!"* *only laughs again and shakes his head* Pretty tense here...

David: *smiles when he gets a kiss on the cheek and grins at Matteo's words* *slightly wiggles his eyebrows* *but then grimaces when he hears Abdi's words, briefly looks at him and quietly and laughingly says* Then just look at the screen – then you won't even notice any of this... *then looks up at Matteo again longingly and slightly pulls on his hand* *wants a proper kiss as long as Jonas and Carlos are gone and Abdi's busy*

Matteo: *grins slightly when David looks up and pulls on his hand* *peeks over to Abdi and sees him stare at the screen in concentration* *then leans down and waits for David to turn his head so that he can kiss him* *manages for 2 seconds before hearing Jonas' voice: "That looks uncomfortable, guys"* *sighs theatrically and looks at Jonas* *Jonas laughs and lifts his hands in defense: "Hey, if that's your thing then I didn't say anything!"* *looks at David* I feel like we need new friends *isn't serious about that, of course*

David: *closes his eyes when Matteo finally kisses him and quietly grumbles in protest when he hears Jonas' voice and they pull apart* *looks at Jonas a little chastisingly and grins when he lifts his hands in defense* *shrugs at Matteo's words and laughs quietly* Well, but if he's right... it really was quite uncomfortable... *sees Jonas nod happily: "Ey, I'm always right – well, okay, most of the time!"* *has also let go of Matteo's hand because his own arm had been uncomfortably pressing on his binder for quite some time because of the weird angle and sits up straight again and stretches a little* *then hears Abdi: "I've told Carlos several times that his parents really need to get another couch..."* *sees Carlos come back with beer: "And where are they supposed to put it!? There's barely enough space for the furniture that's already here... it's really time for me to move out..."* *sees Carlos hand out the beer and also hold one out for him* *hesitates briefly but then shakes his head* *smiles and says* No, thanks, I'll have one next time...

Matteo: *only shrugs* Just because he's right doesn't mean that he isn't annoying... *but then grins at Jonas who is sticking his tongue out at him* *hears Abdi say to Carlos: "We should start a flatshare. A bro flatshare, you and I!"* *grins slightly because that would probably end in utter chaos* *scoots back on the armrest and nudges David with his foot so that he looks up* *then pads the empty space beside him on the armchair* Come up so that we can make out properly... *grins when Abdi and Carlos immediately protest and laughs*

David: *sees Carlos' face lighten up when he hears Abid's suggestion and hears him say: "Yes, awesome! Really, let's plan something!"* *grins slightly because he can somehow imagine what it would look like in their flatshare* *looks up at Matteo when he nudges him with his foot and sees that he has scooted back on the armrest* *laughs at his words and even more at Carlos' and Abdi's protests but immediately pulls himself up on the armchair next to Matteo and leans against him* *hears Jonas: " Well that already looks more comfortable! I'm just thinking about your comfort, guys!" and Carlos: "Ey, but we're not here to make out but to play!" and Abdi, who is still staring at the screen: "Exactly!"* *is a little uncertain again that it might sometimes really bother the guys when he's always with them and when he and Matteo are always so close and therefore scoots a little away from Matteo* *sees that Carlos is watching him and looks at him apologetically* *hears him laugh: "Ey, David, Brudi, that was a joke. As long as you won't start to fuck here and still somehow participate in what's going on, everything's fine."* *also smiles a little and relaxes slightly* *slightly shrugs and murmurs* Well, but it would also be okay if it annoyed you... *hesitates briefly and then adds* ...or if you wanted to see Matteo again without me... *thinks that Hanna and Kiki aren't always there, either* *hears Abdi sigh: "Now he's back at this again..."*

Matteo: *immediately puts his arm around David when he sits down next to him and ignores Abdi's and Carlos' protests* *knows that they are mostly doing it to tease him* *slightly tilts his head at Carlos' comment* Do you see any of us play? *but then feels David scoot away from him and ok, now it's not funny anymore* *pulls him back and is just thinking about how to tell Carlos when he already talks and puts it into perspective* *then shakes his head when David says that it would be okay if they were annoyed* *quietly says* Nooo! *frowns and shakes his head* *then can already hear Carlos' laugh: "Brudi, you're not here when we meet Matteo without you, but believe me, no one here wants that."* *says very drily* Haha. *but then also sees Carlos looking at David a little more serious: "Listen, Brudi, you're a Brudi now, we tease each other, we say things because we know that it annoys the other, we make fun of each other, but we are honest and we tell each other our opinions and we are arguing with each other, but we are also there for each other. And you're in it now, if you want to or not. Well okay, if you really don't want to then not, but it's not because we wouldn't want you. Okay?"* *looks at Carlos surprised and grateful and hears Jonas and Abdi simultaneously add "exactly, Brudi"*

David: *lets himself get pulled back by Matteo but is still quite tense* *but grins slightly when Carlos says that no one wants to see Matteo without him and briefly and lovingly looks over at him* *continues listening to Carlos who suddenly gets serious* *doesn't really know that side of him and is a little surprised that he can say other things than make stupid comments and is a little emotional when he realizes what he's trying to say* *is a little overwhelmed and doesn't really know what to say* *looks at Carlos grateful and then also at Abdi and Jonas when they all agree* *then lowers his gaze in embarrassment and murmurs* Okay... thanks... *adds a little more embarrassed* And of course I want to... it's really pretty cool with you... *then slowly looks up again and shrugs* I just thought... because Hanna and Kiki don't hang out with you guys, either... *hears Jonas laugh: "They wouldn't do that voluntarily..." and Carlos add with a grin: "I think we're a little too much for them or something like that..."* *nods and slowly relaxes again at Matteo's side* *squeezes his arm behind Matteo's back and wraps it around his waist* *is pretty emotional right now and happy about the realization that he's really wanted here and that the boys like having him with them* *sees the three of them smile at him and Matteo and gets a little sheepish again* *is therefore glad when Abdi eventually says: "Okay, I was paying attention to the time: Including the minutes from Jonas I still have 6 minutes until it’s someone else's turn..."* *sees him start the game again and how everyone turns back to the screen* *uses the time to look up at Matteo and to press a soft kiss to his chin*

Matteo: *slightly squeezes David when he thanks them because he figures that it really means something to him* *laughs simultaneously with Jonas when David mentions Hanna and Kiki and nods* They can only put up with us in rations... *grins at David when he snuggles closer again and squeezes him a little closer* *hears Abdi and thinks that this means that he still has 6 minutes until it's his turn* *looks at David when he kisses him, smiles and then kisses him properly* *then quietly and with a wicked grin says* You see?

David: *returns Matteo's kiss and relaxes even more when the other three really seem to not pay any attention to them but instead concentrate on Abdi's game* *smiles when he sees Matteo's wicked look and slightly shrugs* *quietly says* Well you are right every now and then... *tenderly runs his hand over Matteo's cheek and looks at him* *thinks that because of him his live has somehow changed completely, that for the first time he feels like he belongs and that he doesn't have to hide anymore*

Matteo: *grins slightly at his words* *shrugs* I've heard that happens... *tilts his head slightly when David looks at him like /this/* *nudges him slightly* Don't look at me like that... *adds even more quietly* Otherwise I'll have to give my round to Abdi and have to drag you home...

David: *gets nudged by Matteo and slightly grins at his words* *briefly lowers his gaze in embarrassment, but then looks at him again and blushes slightly when he hears his next words* *murmurs quietly and with a slight grin* I wouldn't mind... *briefly looks at the boys, then back at Matteo and sighs quietly* ...but... we should stay for a little longer... for one or two more rounds or so... *as much as he would love to be alone with Matteo he still thinks that it would maybe be a little unfair to the others, especially since they haven't even been here for two hours and the others have just taken a stand for him* *then looks at him again like /this/, puts his hand back to his cheek and pulls him down to kiss him again* *pulls him down even further so that he can whisper in his ear* ...love you pretty much... *then kisses his ear and his cheek and slowly lets go of him again* *thinks that with and because of Matteo somehow everything feels right and sighs happily* *then hears Carlos' voice: "One more minute, Brudi! Just finish that one off already..."*

Matteo: *feels his heartbeat speed up when David gets embarrassed and how incredible it still feels that he's the reason for it* *grins slightly at his answer* *nods slowly when he says that they should stay for a little longer* *then sees the look again and can't help but to beam* *was actually just about to tell him to stop it when he gets pulled into a kiss* *immediately forgets everything else* *feels his lips on his ear and hears his declaration of love and once again can't really believe that this is his life now* *feels the other kisses and how he lets go of him and buries his face in his neck* *kisses him and murmurs "I love you too" against his neck but isn't sure if he heard it* *then hears Carlos declare: "That's it Brudi, now it's Matteo's turn! Brudi, stop cuddling and show Abdi how it's done!"* *grumbles slightly but slowly pulls away from David* *then sees Carlos grin at David: "If you want to you can have me as a replacement!"*

David: *smiles slightly when Matteo kisses his neck and can only guess what he murmurs* *simply feels really happy right now and sighs quietly when Carlos announces that it's Matteo's turn* *lets go of him so that he can sit somewhere where he can reach the controller better and has to laugh when he hears Carlos' suggestion* *wiggles his eyebrows looking at the now-vacant armrest and says* Unfortunately I can only offer you an armrest… *is a little astonished at first but then laughs when Carlos really jumps up and lets himself fall down on the armchair and wraps an arm around him: "Like that?!"* *laughs even more but puts some distance between them* Umm... well... *sees Carlos' mock offended look: "What?! Am I not enough for you?!"* *laughs again and also hears Jonas and Abdi laugh* *is a little overwhelmed right now and is glad when Carlos sits up a little straighter and takes his arm off him and instead puts it on the backrest* *hears Abdi tell Matteo: "Alright – the clock is ticking!" and then watches Matteo play*

Matteo: *gets up and squeezes himself next to Jonas so that he can see the screen better* *then sees what Carlos is doing with David and is almost tempted to throw a pillow at him* *but then drops that thought because Carlos has already had to deal with enough today* *so only laughs slightly and imitates Carlos by making a comment that Carlos often says* I could say something now... *sees Carlos simply grin and shrug at him* *then hears Abdi announce that the clock is ticking and starts the game* *while playing realizes that he's still quite good at it and that it's a lot of fun* *finishes level 28 within a little more than 5 minutes and pumps his fists in the air in triumph*

David: *grins and is happy for Matteo when he moves up a level and joins in on the others' bellowing* *then reaches for his apple juice and takes a sip when he feels Carlos pats him on the shoulder and then asks everyone: "Ey but back to Kiki... what should I act like now? I don't want to seem too clingy, but if I don't somehow tell her how important this is for me she might really think that I wouldn't care or something like this..."* *puts down his apple juice and first waits for what the others are going to say* *but only hears Jonas say: "Just tell her exactly that...", but he’s concentrating more on the screen and Matteo's game* *also glances at the game but then says to Carlos* I kind of agree with Jonas. *briefly gnaws on his bottom lip and thinks before adding* I would definitely tell her that she's important to you and that it's important to you that you continue the relationship and to see each other regularly... I think that doesn't come across as too clingy or anything...* *shrugs* And you can simply ask her opinion about changing universities to go back to Berlin after one or two semesters in Halle... I mean if that's even possible... *sees Carlos run a hand through his hair and look slightly desperate: "Man, I really hope that works out! No one manages four years of long-distance relationship, right!?"* *hears Abdi: "Man, Brudi, just enjoy the time while she's still here!"*

Matteo: *starts the next level and therefore can't really participate in the conversation* *hears what the others are saying and nods in agreement* *only says* I agree... *hears Jonas laugh: "To what exactly?"* *feels a little caught and says* Umm... to what David said... *hears Jonas and also Abdi laugh again: "Of course!"* *pauses the game and leans back* No, seriously... I agree... you can't play any games now... tell her the truth... what you want, I mean... *then grins slightly* Make a clear statement... sometimes that works out really well...

David: *grins at Matteo's words and Abdi's and Jonas' laughter and lovingly looks at Matteo* *then nods at Matteo’s words and decisively adds* Exactly! *sees Carlos look between them and then hears him ask: "So it worked out for you that way?"* *laughs quietly but also grimaces slightly* *hesitates a little and looks over to Matteo to check in before he carefully says* Let's put it this way... if we... well, or mostly me... would have made clear statements from the beginning, we would have gotten together 4 weeks earlier and would have saved us a lot of... crap... *thinks that it wasn't only crap but lovesickness at its best but doesn't say it* *is glad that those times are behind them* *looks at Carlos and says* Believe me, if you are open you save yourself a lot of crap! And Kiki, as well... *sees Carlos nod and hears him sigh: "Okay, I'll try..."* *then hears Jonas: "It's really something that Davenzi seem to be our new experts when it comes to relationships, right?!"* *laughs quietly and shakes his head* Sure, because we have sooo much experience...

Matteo: *smiles and nods slightly when David looks at him* *then nods slightly at his answer* Well, we did have a few clear statements that led to success... *nods again when David is talking about openness* *laughs at Jonas' words and looks at him* Davenzi, seriously? *then shakes his head at David's words* It's only about the success rate and it's definitely the highest in our case *laughs when Jonas and Carlos simultaneously complain with "Ey!"* *only laughs drily and then continues playing*

David: *grins at Matteo's addition and nods* Yes, to the small successes... *thinks about the fact that he immediately showed up at Matteo's doorstep when he held a gun to his head and about the fact that his coming-out to Matteo was also a small success – even though there was a bit of a time lag because it has somehow been ruined by the outing in the school* *has to grin when Carlos and Jonas simultaneously complain about Matteo, but doesn't further comment on it further and watches Matteo play* *at some point hears Carlos again: "Ey, Brudi, but I have one more question: If openness is so great and leads to success why weren't you, like, open to Matteo from the beginning?"* *takes a deep breath and then says: "Because I was scared... that Matteo would no longer like me when I'm open..."* *sees Carlos nod satisfied: "That's what I thought! And I am also scared of openness even though I theoretically know that it's for the best!"* *laughs quietly and shakes his head* That's something completely different. You're already together with Kiki and you know that she loves you! She knows you! *clears his throat and then says a little more insecurely* In my case it was more about being afraid that Matteo would no longer like me once he learns that I'm trans. I just felt like I would keep an important detail about me from him... but Kiki already knows everything about you and probably loves you because of it... *sees Carlos stare at him and doesn't know if it's a good sign or a bad sign and if Carlos understood what he was trying to say or not* *at some point feels Carlos put his arm around his shoulders again and hears him say: "Ey, Brudi! I think it's better if you talk to Kiki for me..."* *laughs quietly and only says* Nonsense, you can do it...

Matteo: *at first doesn't really hear Carlos' question because he has to focus on an opponent* *only realizes Jonas getting a little tense next to him* *but then hears David's answer and quickly glances over at them, after all* *is a little annoyed that he has missed the question* *is glad when Abdi nudges him and tells him "your time's up"* *pauses the game and looks over at Carlos and David* *has to grin at David's answer because it's true and David can say it so well* *can't really blame Carlos for suggesting that David should talk to Kiki* *hears Jonas laugh next to him: "Good idea, we'll turn David into our relationship guru, if there’s anything wrong you can talk to Hanna for me..."* *hears Abdi say: "Only poor Matteo has to do his relationship conversations for himself..." *grins and shrugs* I can manage...

David: *blushes when even Jonas starts with Hanna, lowers his gaze and shakes his head* I can't really do that, either... only in theory... *then hears Abdi and Matteo and lovingly looks at Matteo* Exactly! Basically Matteo is even better at it than I am... he was much more open and brave! *sees Jonas look at Matteo with a smile and Carlos look at Matteo scrutinizingly and how he eventually shakes his head: "No, I don't believe it!"* *leans forward and pours some more apple juice* *shrugs and grins slightly* But it's true... *then realizes that Carlos is distracted and looking at the screen: "Ey, is it my turn? Is the time up?!"* *hears Abdi laugh: "Today you don't notice anything, Digga..."* *sees Carlos get up and shoo Matteo from his spot: "Move over... or go back over there to cuddle... it's my turn!"* *takes a sip and was just about to lean back and relax while Carlos sits down and reaches for the controller when he looks at him and Matteo again: "Ey, but I have one more question for you: If you were in this situation now, let's say Luigi has a university spot in Berlin and David in Halle... what would you do then?"* *feels a stab in his stomach because those are exactly the thoughts he had at the beginning of this whole Kiki-Carlos long-distance-relationship-drama, so only shakes his head and murmurs* You don't even wanna know... *then gets up and asks* Where's the bathroom? *has to go anyways and doesn't really want to answer the question honestly and is therefore glad when Abdi immediately answers: "Next to the front door!"* *nods and lightly runs a hand over Matteo’s arm on his way out of the living room as Matteo has now made his way back to the armchair*

Matteo: *shakes his head* That's not true... you're really good at it... *slightly shakes his head when David says that he's much better at it* *but then smiles when he looks at him like this* *sticks his tongue out at Carlos* Did you hear? It's true! *only laughs when Carlos realizes that it's his turn and gets up from his seat* *takes his beer from the table when Carlos asks the question and freezes slightly* *immediately knows the answer but also knows that David probably doesn’t not want to hear it* *immediately looks at David and doesn't really know what he wants to say with the answer* Umm... *then sees David basically flee from the living room and lets himself drop on the armchair with a sigh* *hears Carlos say a little remorseful: "Sorry, did I put my foot in my mouth?"* *shakes his head* No... don't know... not really... I told him that I would go wherever he goes... I have no idea what I want to do, anyways...

David: *is in the bathroom and hopes that they will be done with the topic when he returns to the living room* *has been asking himself the theoretical question of what would happen if Matteo and he were to be in a similar situation and caught himself thinking that he would then study something else that he could do closer to Matteo* *has been really shocked about that thought and therefore not really thought about it much further – but because of Carlos' question it has come back* *knows that it's all just in theory but still worries about what if Matteo really does find something that interests him, and that Matteo and him feel so comfortable in Berlin and that their friends are here, that it would actually be crazy to leave that city again* *still can't get used to the idea that Matteo would really go with him and sacrifice himself so much that he simply hopes that his applications in Hamburg and Köln won't work out and that he'll instead get accepted in Potsdam or Berlin* *then also wonders why Kiki has already received her acceptance letter and he hasn’t, and thinks that his letters will probably arrive within the next few days* *stares at himself in the mirror for some time after washing his hands but then sighs quietly and goes back into the living room* *then sees that Carlos is now playing and that the others are concentrating and commenting on the game* *sits down on the armrest next to Matteo and with a smile runs his hand through his hair* *then also looks at the screen and is glad that they seem to be done with that topic*

Matteo: *sees everyone nod and hears Jonas say: "I get it... I still hope that you'll stay in Berlin."* *sees everyone nod again and how Carlos then starts to play* *looks toward the bathroom and hopes that David is all right and that he isn't thinking of some worst-case-scenarios right now* *smiles when he comes back and sits down next to him* *immediately leans his head against him and searches for his hand to squeeze it* *wants to ask him if everything is okay or at least tell him that he still wants to go wherever he goes, but thinks that right now isn't the right moment and plans on mentioning it when they are alone again*

David: *puts his arm around Matteo when he leans his head against him and presses a quick kiss on his hair* *entwines their fingers when he reaches for his hand and briefly returns the squeeze* *then figures that as long as they're together nothing else matters and relaxes again somewhat* *at some point hears Abdi ask: "Do we take any games on our trip or are we going cold turkey?"* *hears Carlos: "I'm against cold turkey!" and Jonas: "Ey, the girls will kill us if we bring the playstation! It's about doing stuff with everyone..."* *sees Abdi grin: "That's what we're doing right now!"* *also grins slightly* Yes, but maybe outside... with exercise and stuff... *sees Carlos grimace slightly for a moment: "And what are we gonna do if it rains for a week!"?*

Matteo: *closes his eyes a little because it's simply so comfortable right now* *only shakes his head slightly at Abdi's question* *laughs slightly and opens his eyes again* The girls won't see it like that... *grins at Carlos' question and wiggles his eyebrows* Lie in the tent and listen to the rain... *hears everyone laugh and Carlos say: "Yeah, yeah, you ol' romantic."* *only shrugs and grins*

David: *also laughs quietly at Matteo's words and tenderly runs a hand through his hair when he talks about lying in the tent when it rains* *thinks that it sounds really cozy and murmurs to Matteo* We'll do that! *sees Jonas stretch and hears him say: "Well, too bad that Carlos won't be able to as he's not sleeping in a tent..." and Carlos' answer: "Ey, I’ll definitely sleep one night in a tent – no matter what Kiki says!" and Abdi: "Oh, I'm quite happy with my spot on the couch..." and Jonas: "Wuss!" and Abdi: "Ey, it's totally not chill in a tent when it rains! If you have to go to the bathroom at night or something like that..." and Jonas again: "Man, then you just hold it or you just get a few drops of rain! How awful! Besides, it's not going to rain! We are going to have sunshine for two weeks and go into the lake every days!"* *amusedly listens to the conversation while running a hand over the back of Matteo's hand* *is really excited for their holiday and really hopes that the weather will be more or less good* *suddenly hears Carlos: "Ey, David, Brudi, how will it be for you and the lake, anyways... you'll come in with us during our holiday, right?"* *feels himself get a little tense at Carlos' question and eventually answers a little nervously and sheepishly* Hmmm, I... dunno... I think so. *is glad that he has at least ordered the swim binder but really doesn't know yet if he'll be brave enough to actually wear it and swim in the lake with the others*

Matteo: *only grins about the conversation about rain and tent* *doesn't think that’s going to be a problem* *only hopes that Carlos won't show up in their tent in the middle of the night* *then hears his question and immediately looks at David to see his reaction and to save him if he needs to* *squeezes his hand slightly* We can decide that spontaneously, right? *sees Carlos shrug* *then hears Abdi say: "We really don't care, dude. What you were or whatever..."* *shoots him an evil glance and grumbles* But it's not about you.

David: *returns Matteo's squeeze and is glad that he's here and that he understands him* *nods at his words and then gets even more embarrassed when he hears Abdi's words, even though he's sure he only means well* *hears Jonas agree with Matteo: "I agree. It's about the fact that David has to feel comfortable."* *smiles slightly and gratefully and then hears Carlos, who briefly looks up from the game and looks at him: "Well, but Abdi is also right. Maybe it even makes it somehow easier for you if you know that we really don't care. Aren't there those neoprene thingies... the ones that divers wear or something like that... if you wear something like that, for example, then you wouldn't even see anything, right?"* *briefly presses his lips together and nervously squeezes Matteo's hand because it’s completely new for him that this topic is discussed so openly and he doesn't really know what to make of it* *on the one hand thinks that it's really good to hear that the others don't care but on the other hand thinks that it's still his body, which he doesn't like at all the way it is, and he can't really estimate if he'll ever be able to deal with it as matter-of-factly as the others would like him to* *hesitates before eventually answering* Well... it's... cool that you don't care... *sighs quietly and shakes his head before quietly adding* ...but I do... *shrugs and insecurely responds to Carlos' comment* There are swim binders – they are similar to those neoprene diving tops... I... hmmm... I ordered one of those... but I really don't know yet, if I... *stops because he realizes that it's really difficult and is therefore glad when Jonas saves him: "Ey, Brudi, don't worry! If you feel like swimming and you're feeling comfortable, then just do it, and if you don't, then don't! Everything’s chill!"* *nods and sees Carlos and Abdi nod as well* *relaxes a little and then hears Abdi say to Carlos: "Ey, your time is up! It's David's turn!"* *grins slightly and waves it off* You can have 10 minutes from me – I promised... *sees Carlos grin and Abdi comment: "Ey, 10 minutes is really a lot..."* *leans a little more against Matteo and enjoys the 10 minutes of closeness to him he has left* *thinks that – as uncomfortable as talking about it is – it might be really good if the guys know how hard it is for him to go into the water and that they won't argue about it every day when they're at the lake – that it might somehow take away some of the pressure and that it really might be a little easier for him to really go swimming with them*

Matteo: *squeezes David's hand a little tighter and also changes his position a little so that he can wrap his arm around him* *nods at what Jonas says and is happy that he understands it* *is also happy that Abdi and Carlos are so cool with all of that but can also understand that it might be a little too much for David* *presses a kiss on David's temple and is glad when they seem to change the subject* *whispers at David* If you want to leave, you'll tell me, right?

David: *smiles slightly at Matteo’s words and murmurs* Everything okay… *thinks that it really is okay… the guys are interested and understanding and no one is pressuring him… it is probably just a feeling he still has to get used to* *then watches Carlos’ game again with the others until he pauses to take a sip of beer* *hears Jonas: “Ey, dude, get on with it… I’m meeting Hanna soon and I want to play again, as well!"* *sees Carlos shake his head unsympathetically and calmly put his beer back on the table: “Don’t rush me, Brudi! First, the mountain troll…”* *grins slightly when Carlos starts playing again but doesn’t manage to defeat the mountain troll* *hears Jonas groan: “Just let David play – he can do it!” and Carlos: “One more try!”* *watches as Carlos doesn’t manage it on his next try and then sees him hold the controller out to him* *grins slightly, quickly kisses Matteo on the forehead and then sits down on the floor in front of the armchair again and tries his luck with the mountain troll*

Matteo: *nods slightly when David says that everything is okay* *laughs when Jonas says that Carlos should let David play* *lets go of David when it’s his turn* *then watches Carlos make some space and reaches his arms out for him* *grins at him broadly* Come on, Carlos, I also need a replacement! *laughs when Carlos basically jumps on top of him and when he cuddles him* *hits him slightly and then pushes him back a little, after all* *hears Jonas laugh and say: “Well if Carlos was jealous because you were talking to Abdi then I’m jealous now, too… do you remember when I used to be your cuddle-buddy, Luigi?"* *gapes at him in shock and immediately looks at David to see his reaction* *hears Jonas backtrack quickly as he seems to have noticed what he had just said: “Well, I mean… not that I desperately want to cuddle you, but…”* *sees him shrug a little helplessly*

David: *starts the game and can see Carlos jump on Matteo from the corner of his eyes* *laughs quietly* *then hears Jonas and at first doesn’t think anything of it – only after Jonas stammers and backtracks does he realize what Jonas just said* *feels something tighten inside him but tries not to let it show because he thinks that it’s silly because they have already cleared this thing up and also because he doesn’t want Abdi and Carlos to notice anything and ask questions* *remembers how hard it was for Matteo to tell Jonas and wants to spare him from also having to explain himself to Abd and Carlos* *stares at the screen stubbornly and slightly petrified and presses some random buttons without really paying attention to what he’s doing until he hears Abdi: “Ey, dude, David what are you doing?! You definitely won’t defeat the troll like that!"* *forces himself to stop being so rigid and clears his throat because he somehow has a small lump in his throat* *murmurs without looking at anyone* Sorry… my mind was somewhere else… *takes a deep breath and concentrates* *actually manages to defeat the troll after only a short time and hears Abdi and Carlos cheer* *only smiles slightly but is still rather looking at the screen than anywhere else* *doesn’t want to see in neither Jonas’ nor Matteo’s faces that they are somehow worried about him*

Matteo: *looks from Jonas to David and watches him closely* *sees his shoulders get tense and that he’s rigidly staring at the screen* *then almost flinches when Abdi reprimands David* *would love to pull David into a hug to have him close and take away the tension* *looks at Carlos and asks* How much time does he have left? *hears Carlos say: “3 minutes”* *nods slowly and then says* Do we want to get going after? Or maybe just go outside for a minute? *hears Abdi ask: “What? Why that? The night’s still young!"*

David: *is a little annoyed that he gave Carlos his 10 minutes as he’d rather stare at the screen for 13 more minutes than only three* *then hears Matteo’s suggestion and doesn’t really know how to place it* *hears Carlos: “I don’t care either way… I still have beer here and it’s actually quite cozy right now, but if the majority wants to go outside…”* *doesn’t really care, either, but would rather stare at the screen for a little longer to avoid other topics of conversation* *murmurs slightly distracted* Jonas still wanted to play… he has to go meet Hanna afterwards, anyway… *plays for a little longer and then hears Abdi: “Time’s up!"* *pauses the game, briefly looks at Jonas to hand him the controller and sees him looking at him a little worried* *only lifts his eyebrows for a moment and smiles slightly to signal him that everything’s okay before looking away again* *doesn’t really like himself right now because this topic is stuck in his head once again and because he actually wanted to put it behind him and because he probably even would have managed if Jonas hadn’t somehow acted worried* *leans back against the armchair again, pulls his legs closer, wraps his arms around them and watches Jonas start the game*

Matteo: *doesn’t take his eyes off David* *knows that he doesn’t like it when people worry about him but can’t really change that right now* *especially since it’s his fault and his stupid crush from the past* *scoots a little and then slides off the armchair to the floor next to David* *doesn’t know what to say, especially with Carlos and Abdi within hearing distance* *so simply stays next to hm and waits, basically offering himself without doing anything* *is quite glad that Abdi and Carlos are busy watching Jonas* *thinks that otherwise at least one of them would notice that something is going on*

David: *feels Matteo slide down next to him and knows exactly that he’s worried* *usually finds it quite cute but right now wishes that he wouldn’t* *stares at the screen for a little longer but then can no longer ignore Matteo’s presence next to him and looks over at him* *sees that Matteo immediately returns his gaze, lifts his eyebrows and tilts his head slightly as if to say: “Stop worrying!"* *lets his legs fall to the side against Matteo’s to somehow signal him that everything is okay, that it’s neither Matteo’s nor Jonas’ problem that those thoughts are still somehow occupying his mind* *still trusts Matteo but still can’t really do anything about this stupid feeling in his gut*

Matteo: *is at least somewhat relieved when David finally looks at him* *but immediately sees that what he already thought is true: that David doesn’t want him to worry* *shrugs one shoulder and grimaces briefly as if to say: “I can’t really help worrying about you”* *then slightly bumps him back with his legs* *then reaches his arm out and carefully wraps it around David’s shoulders* *then hears Carlos behind him: “Ey, Abdi, what are you looking at?"* *hears Abdi answer: “At those two… that’s so sick… they’re not saying a single word, but something’s going on!"* *slightly rolls his eyes and shakes his head* *hears Jonas say: “Leave them be. It’s fine."*

David: *slightly rolls his eyes at Matteo’s expression, grins slightly and shakes his head as if to tell him that he should try* *then tears his gaze away from Matteo when he feels him wrap his arm around him and hesitates for only a few seconds before slightly leaning against Matteo* *then hears Carlos, Abdi and Jonas and at first feels his heartbeat speed up because he thinks that they did notice that they are acting weird* *tenses a little for only a moment, but then puts on a slightly provocative grin and says* We’re communicating telepathically… really cool! *sees Abdi look at him in slight disbelief and has to laugh quietly*

Matteo: *also freezes a little because he actually doesn't want to explain himself* *is therefore grateful to Jonas and then David that they are taking some of the tension away* *then hears Abdi: "Oh really, and what did you say?"* *is just about to answer when he hears Carlos: "Dude, if they wanted you to hear it they would have said it out loud!"* *sees Abdi nod: "Yes, okay... I just wanted to see if it works... David, I'll whisper something in your ear and then you have to tell it to Matteo telepathically!"* *can't help but to laugh at the suggestion and looks at David challengingly* Well, then, go on...

David: *freezes slightly when he hears Abdi's question but then nods at Carlos' question with a slight grin* *then laughs at Abdi's suggestion and looks to Matteo a little doubtful when he even agrees* *but then sighs and says* Okay... *pulls away from Matteo's arm and crawls the two meters toward Abdi* *has to grin when he sees Abdi seemingly think about it, but then sees him grin, lean toward him and whispers into his ear: "Matteo is a looser at Zelda!"* *briefly lifts his eyebrows but then nods with a grin and crawls back to Matteo* *sits down in front of him cross-legged and can barely contain his laughter* Okay.... concentrate! *takes a deep breath and then gets serious* *looks at Matteo and then points at him with his eyes, rolls his eyes as if to diss him and then uses his eyes and his head to slightly point toward the screen* *then briefly lowers his gaze, grins again slightly and then looks at Matteo* *murmurs* Come on, you can do it!

Matteo: *closely observes David and Abdi* *sees Abdi look a little mischievous and David lift his eyebrows* *thinks that it's definitely something against him* *also sits down cross-legged and looks at David* *nods* Yes, sir. *nods in confirmation when he rolls his eyes, was already expecting this* *then sees him glance toward the screen and has to laugh slightly* Hmmm... let me think how Abdi would put it... Matteo sucks at Zelda. *hears Carlos laugh and sees Abdi shake his head: "Dude, that's creepy!"*

David: *looks at Matteo expectantly when he thinks and then grins broadly when he almost has the right answer* *briefly looks at the others, who are grinning, laughing and looking gobsmacked and then simply leans forward to Matteo* *presses a brief kiss onto his mouth and murmurs* We're good... *didn't really think that it would work like that without any context and is a little proud of Matteo and himself* *then scoots back towards the armchair and hears Abdi: "Yes, okay, but that was really easy... I should have said something political or so..."* *shrugs slightly and grinningly says* Unfortunately, there's only one show per day... *hears Carlos say: "And next time it's my turn! Then David has to telepathically read something from Matteo!"* *slightly shakes his head and laughs quietly* *wonders if Abdi and Carlos are really taking this serious or if they are simply playing along* *then hears Jonas: "Fuck, I have to get going... I totally forgot the time with your telepathy-stuff..."*

Matteo: *grins and pumps his fist in the air when he obviously guessed right* *kisses David back and grins* Of course we're good. *only laughs when Abdi finds excuses and shakes his head* *shakes his head at David's comment and points at Carlos* What? Are you scared that you can't read me as well as I can read you? *but grins at him while he says it and isn't really serious about it* *then hears Jonas and gets up to say goodbye to him* Say hi to Hanna and tell her to text me where we are supposed to meet tomorrow, ok?

David: *only shrugs his shoulders with a grin at Matteo's question and thinks that they maybe should practice a little in case Carlos really asks them again* *then sees Matteo get up to say goodbye to Jonas and averts his gaze when they hug* *is a little annoyed at himself because of it, because everything was okay between Jonas and him* *hears Jonas answer: "Will do!"* *sees Jonas ruffle Carlos' hair and return Abdi's fist bump* *then sees Jonas' hand appear in front of his face when he holds it out to him invitingly: "Come on, Brudi, let me give you a hug!"* *knows that Jonas wants to make it easy for him and is actually pretty grateful to him* * hesitates only briefly but then takes his hand and lets Jonas pull him up* *then gets hugged and hears him whisper: "Sorry about earlier..."* *slightly shakes his head and murmurs* Everything's okay... *returns Jonas' smile when he pulls away from him and lets Jonas pat his shoulder again before Jonas says his goodbyes to everyone with the words: "Stay clean!"* *lets himself fall back into the armchair and sees that Abdi has already picked up the controller and started the game again* *looks at Matteo and knows exactly that he has observed the scene between him and Jonas and probably wonders again if everything's okay* *sighs quietly, smiles slightly and reaches his hands out for him*

Matteo: *has remained next to the armchair after he said goodbye to Jonas to see if David might also want to leave* *watches Jonas pull David up and actually thinks that it's a good thing* *but also hopes that it's not too much for David* *tries to see his face but unfortunately only sees his back* *then sees David sit down, what seems to be a good sign* *smiles slightly when he reaches his arms out for him, sits down on the armchair and leans against David* *sees Carlos and Abdi both sitting on the couch and how Abdi reaches for the controller* *lifts his head a little so that his mouth is closer to David's ear and whispers* Level-up, alright? You're the top level, unreachable...

David: *wraps both arms around Matteo when he leans against him like that and runs a hand through his hair* *enjoys being close to Matteo and thinks that the stupid feeling in his gut doesn't have anything to do with Matteo and actually neither with Jonas but that it’s only his stupid insecurity for which there is no rational reason* *then feels Matteo lift his head and slightly leans toward him when he realizes that Matteo wants to say something to him* *then hears his words and needs a minute to really understand them* *then feels his heartbeat pick up and suddenly feels a lump in his throat again because Matteo is simply incredible and because there is no reason to doubt the relationship to Matteo or to doubt himself because Matteo doesn’t, either, and because he's doing everything he can to prove to him how important he is to him* *swallows the lump and kisses his cheek because that's the only thing he can reach right now and murmurs into his ear* Except for you... *doesn't really notice anymore what Abdi and Carlos are doing and talking about on the couch because right now he's so caught up in Matteo's presence that he briefly wonders if they shouldn't go home, after all* *wraps his arms around Matteo a little tighter and buries his face on Matteo's shoulder*

Matteo: *feels that David doesn't immediately understand what he means and immediately doubts having found the right words* *thinks about what else he could say, how to take away this stupid feeling from David that there could be anything that could become dangerous to him, to them both* *but then feels the kiss on his cheek and is relieved* *is just about to scoot a little so that he can kiss him properly when he hears his words* *actually wants to shake his head but suppresses it* *simply wraps his arms around him and kisses his hair* *whispers* Let's go home, ok?

David: *smiles at Matteo's words and briefly thinks that the telepathy thing even works when they're not looking at each other* *nods into his shoulder, slowly pulls away from him and looks at the others* *meets Carlos' gaze, who has his eyebrows drawn up: "Ey, let me guess... you'd rather continue making out in peace and want to go home!"* *laughs quietly and shrugs* Is it that obvious?! *sees Abdi nod without looking away from the screen: "Pretty..."* *pulls away from Matteo some more and hears Carlos: "It's actually outrageous! There we are saying that it doesn't bother us when you’re always hanging around each other and make out – and instead we're the ones bothering you when you’re making out! Ey, you're really intolerant!"* *but sees him grin and then realizes that he's not really serious about it*

Matteo: *grins slightly when the two complain* You two prefer to be alone as well... to plan your flatshare, right? *sees Abdi's gaze brighten: "Oh yes, good idea!"* *grins and gets up from the armchair* *sees Carlos grin: "You've been together for so long now and you still ditch us to make out!"* *draws up his eyebrows* Not for thaaaat long... *sees Carlos grin and hears him say: “Get out of here already!"* *briefly hugs him and quickly shakes Abdi's hand* Ey, but if there's anything... because of Kiki or something like that... you can text anytime, ok? *hears Carlos: "I know that, Brudi, take care"* *waits for David to also say goodbye and then leaves the apartment with him*

David: *grins when Carlos says that they should get out of here and also hugs him briefly because he stood up to do so* *hears Carlos say to him: "Ey and think about swimming again... it's gonna be awesome!", simply smiles briefly and nods* I will... *fist bumps Abdi, because he didn't get up and wishes them fun with planning their flatshare* *then leaves the apartment together with Matteo and silently follows him down the stairs to their bikes* *then has to wait because Matteo has locked his bike onto his and takes a deep breath* *thought that the afternoon was nice albeit a little emotionally exhausting – first the thing with Kiki and the long-distance-relationship, Carlos' speech about how welcome he is in their circle of friends, then him defending Matteo's protective instinct, Carlos using "retarded" again, then the discussion about swimming and finally the thing with Jonas and Matteo – and all of that within only 3 hours* *now simply enjoys the quiet and that he's alone again with Matteo*

Matteo: *unlocks their bikes and moves his bike aside so that David can reach his'* *watches him* *then doesn't get onto his bike and instead pushes it and looks over to him* *slightly tilts his head when he also looks over* Do you want to talk or... just cycle home?

David: *unlocks his bike and then pushes it over to Matteo and keeps pushing it alongside him* *at some point notices Matteo looking at him and returns his look* *smiles slightly at his question and thinks about it* *actually wants to talk about a lot of things – except maybe the thing with Jonas – but doesn't really know where to begin right now and what he should say* *therefore asks quietly* Let's just cycle home for now...? *quickly adds* Unless you would like to talk... *looks at him scrutinizingly* *actually doesn't want Matteo to always only consider his feelings and to always put himself last*

Matteo: *hears his answer and nods* *has already expected that* *stops to get onto his bike when David adds something* *thinks about it for a moment but then shrugs* Dunno... I... somehow I do... but it somehow was a lot today. *shrugs again* Maybe we should go to your place first?

David: *sees Matteo think about it and then smiles slightly when he says that he somehow does want to talk* *nods when he says that it had been a lot today* Oh yeah... *then nods again when Matteo says that they should go to his place first* *pushes his bike next to Matteo's and then starts getting up but then quickly leans over to Matteo again to quickly kiss him* *smiles slightly and then asks* And then talk and order pizza? You haven't eaten anything in over four hours... I'm a little surprised that you haven't collapsed from hunger yet... *grins and quickly runs a hand through his hair before really getting on his bike*

Matteo: *grins into the kiss and nods slightly* *then also starts getting on his bike* *tilts his head and looks at him amused* Haha... then it's high time before I really do collapse... *then also grins at him and starts cycling after him* *is somehow happy that they can still joke and kiss even though there is something going on* *has a fluttering feeling in his gut, maybe something like safety, maybe something like trust that this will really work no matter what* *really likes that*

(next play)

#Druck #druck og #matteo florenzi #david schreibner #davenzi #davenzi plays

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traveljaunts · 5 years ago

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Not exaggerating. Each word in this photo story about my Spiti travel is true and have lived every moment along with the other women in our group.

Let me start with Hikkim, the highest post office in the world. I have the post cards in my hand to send to my loved ones.

Hikkim post office , claims to be the highest in the world

8th day of our Spiti valley tour; date being 17th August and am with my best closeup smile even though a night before I did have weird feelings while writing these postcards from Langza. Firstly because in the world of emails and whatsapp, I was planning to send postcards that too from the top of the world called Hikkim.

And secondly I was thinking a lot as if the messages on the postcards were my last messages; the most important ones & the only things that I needed to say to Sudiip ( my husband ) & Aashvik (my son). At a height of 14500 ft, Langza does make you feel like that, I guess.

Langza village – For sure one of the most exotic places to spend time for introspection

This is Langza at a height almost equal to that of the heaven. Max 8 to 10 houses surrounded by mountains on all sides and a Buddha statue staring across the Spiti valley from a shoulder of the ridge above the village.

Luxurious homestay after a 50min uphill winding ride to this remote village, super tasty food and a phone (BSNL land line) to talk to…Wow! And ofcourse, making a call from the roof terrace of this Langza homestay under the cold starry night, to talk to our loved ones was truly offbeat:-)

This is Sapna and myself having one of the most heavenly soups to beat the cold at Langza homestay after our phonecalls from the roof

Langza was our highest stay but not the coldest. Coldest in the region is Komic village and you can see the highest restaurant board below. Spiti valley claims all the interesting destination selling titles…highest post office, highest restaurant, the last village, the only house, the only dhaba , the only souls and so on.

This is me @ world’s highest restaurant in Komic (Shivering inside, posing outside)

Anyway..from Langza, Hikkim & Komic, we were to go to Chandratal via Kaza. This was almost the end part of our journey which had started at Shimla on 10th Aug and was to end on 19th Aug at Manali. However, by afternoon of 17th Aug the story, the scenes, the sporadic showstoppers , everything changed.

Before taking you to the climax of the story, let me show you some glimpses of our journey so far and introduce you to the characters of our story.

All of us @Shimla, the first day of our women tour to Spiti valley in Himachal

Here we are. This was taken at Shimla Mall road in the evening. Sapna, Bharati, Asha & myself ( right to left). Sapna’s history is interesting she was in Kerala when the floods happened, she was in Khardungla Leh when the snowslide happened and now she was in Himachal when an orange alert was indicated.

Bharti’s last travel was a decade back to Kashmir. She had left work, two daughters, two dogs and a worrisome husband behind to be on this women tour that too to Spiti in Himalayas.

Asha, the third lady in the pic was on her third women trip within a year. Quite particular about the food and stay (disliked tents), she didn’t know the adventure that awaited her.

All women tour to Spiti valley in Himachal- Some flashback

Shimla to Sangla

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Sangla to Kalpa

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Kalpa to Tabo

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Tabo to Dhankar and Mudh

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Oh ! I have to talk about Dhankar experience here.

The monastery that you can see above is Dhankar, built on an elevation overlooking the confluence of the Spiti and Pin Rivers – one of the world’s most spectacular settings. And the village of Dhankar is surrounded by lotus petals like structures which makes it look like the spiritual centre or the place of awakening literally.

I guess we were just short of one more minute of meditation at Dhankar for our awakening to know what was coming.

To compensate, Sapna and I also decided to trek to the holy Dhankar lake for remaining enlightenment. Perched above the Dhankar village and Gompa, Dhankar Lake lies after a steep trek of 45 minute to 1.5 hr (depending on what goes on in your head and body).

From a distance, it did seem simple but that was an eye wash. To add, I also decided to trek in sandals given that I had only seen 20% of the path from a distance and wanted to avoid bothering our driver with luggage shifting to take my shoes out.

Result? Every time I looked behind to assess the descend part while I was climbing up the mountain, the only thought in my head was…

‘Khudi ko kar bulad itna he koi bhi pahaad chad jaaye aur phir khuda tujhse pooche, gadhe chad to gaya hai ab utrega kaise’

Anyway, we did finish the trek somehow and anyhow despite all body odds. And to treat ourselves for the big win we even ate 2 extra nutella chocolate pan cakes at lunch just to keep our weight, fat and sugar levels intact.

By evening we were at Mudh and this is me having tea. I thought this pic should be the cover page of my book someday.

Sipping green tea in the evening at Mudh

Mudh lies at the end of motorable road in the Pin valley. As you can see, you get totally isolated with tea in hand and views in front here. No phone no connection, only introspection.

Pin Valley views, then Mudh to Kaza

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Beautiful right? Pin Valley was quite scenic. I wanted to stop for pictures at every turn but our driver didn’t really like to be left behind other vehicles on these roads.

The meditation and introspection may not have worked for me but the law of attraction did work at this point, and we got a tyre puncture. Courtesy that, I clicked these and we even reached Kaza on time.

Kaza was the biggest town and the biggest market. We ate (from Thenthuk to Teemo), we shopped (from all kinds of souvenirs to household stuff) and we made calls (from our family members to maids to dogs). Yes, atleast BSNL worked !

Second day, from Kaza we drove to see Key and Kibber intentionally and Tashi gang unintentionally. Let me explain how? Now is the time to introduce you to the antagonist of the story, the showstopper, our driver Mr. Chaman.

He looks daring here but the pic is misleading 🙂

Chaman reminded me of the monsterjob commercial , ‘Caught in the wrong job. Thin, tall, and paranoid. Scared for a driver’s profession and usually expected things to go wrong from puncture, to bad weather to pushing the vehicle to getting stuck in Spiti.’ Would tell us ,‘ Jo driver ka sune to sukhi aur jo na sune to dukhi’

This day, contrary to Chaman’s wish, I asked him to drive to Ghette after Kibber & Key monastery for the views. Chaman was already reluctant and then the weather also decided to play spoilsport.

It started drizzling.. After 30 min of driving, we found a vehicle on the road waiting for its trekkers to return. Instead of asking,’ How far is Ghette?’ Chaman asked, ‘How far’? The fellow said,’ 6-7 kms more’.

Ironically we had already crossed Ghette and the fellow meant Tashi Gang village from there. After many twists and turns we finally reached Tashi Gang on top of the mountains. One small camp around and two souls..

Chaman decided to return immediately to head to Langza but the road had become wet. As we tried to move ahead in speed for inclined roads, the tyres began to lose grip and the ground got messy & slippery. This was too much for Chaman’s tolerance. He began,’ ab kar lo apna intezaam yahin par’ and stopped the car.

Before the chauvinist in him could reach it’s heights, I gave him back. But ya, to make him drive we waited until his enlightenment when he saw other cars coming from either sides being safely driven without fear.

Reached Langza by evening and we missed Ghette even on return.

Langza to Chandratal via Kaza

Chandratal lake on a cloudy rainy day

Camping at Chandratal – Fancy no? This was supposedly our last night stay in our choicest list of govt forsaken places.

Govt forsaken because we are talking about the merciless Himalayas in Spiti Valley, Himachal. These places are highly landslide prone . It’s not a border area so no development, no roads & no Army around to help.

Telephone connection is a luxury. BRO ( border road organization) wakes up only at 11 am to start the work and that too after days of reminder provided one is able to send the information in first place. Afterall, not everyone carries a satellite phone.

We were glad, after Chandratal we would reach Manali soon and then fly back to Bangalore.

When we reached Chandratal, it started raining. Instead of going to the camp first, we thought of visiting the Chandratal lake. It was at less than 2 kms by car and then a few hundred meters by walk. To add to the spice in life, Sapna’s stomach started to hurt. She went to mark her territory for obvious reasons near the lake and realized it was a stomach infection.

With difficulty, we returned to the tent. It was damn cold, very difficult to even get out of the bed. The drizzle turned into a downpour in sometime.

Before dinner, Chaman came with his driver friend called Amar to give another bad news. ‘Manali road is closed due to cloud burst. No one can go ahead, we may have to go back to Shimla from where we started.’

Was it a joke? We had taken 6 days to reach Chandratal from Shimla. I said, ‘we will see tomorrow’.

I knew that the route from Chandratal to Manali was already at its worst and Chaman had been fearing to drive on those treacherous roads since beginning so I wanted to decide based on what other normal drivers would do in the morning.

Now was the time for some genuine god remembrance. Before sleeping, I recited Hanuman Chalisa and prayed for some divine intervention. That night I couldn’t sleep well due to cold and weather anxiety.

Halfway through the night, I woke up to someone’s singing outside of our tents ,’ Snowfall snowfall.‘ Hum sab phas chuke hain, jaldi utho bhai log.’ And this was the scene outside.

https://www.traveljaunts.in/wp-content/uploads/2019/09/Chandratal-day-part-1.mp4

Some were excited to see the snow, some were worried and drivers like Chaman were shit scared. We didn’t know what was the right thing to do. Go towards Manali or go back to Shimla via Kaza or stay where we were.

Within minutes, some of the vehicles started to leave Chandratal. After some group discussion with other drivers, Chaman too instructed us to get into the car . The idea was to atleast try and reach the village on the highway called Batal. Chandratal is connected via link road from the highway so if it takes 2-3 days to clear highway, the link road takes forever. We also got to know that last year in Sept, within 3 days, the place had received feets of snowfall and people were rescued with great difficulty. Even the tents at the camps had fallen down.

With tension in mind and around, we sat in the car. Chaman made sure that our vehicle was amidst other vehicles. We started but hardly a few meters were crossed and Chaman realized that the vehicle wouldn’t restart once the engine is shut down. The vehicle was stuck.

The snowfall was increasing. The tension started to build up not only within our vehicle but also among others behind us. Overtaking was out of question on such roads. People wanted to get to the highway as soon as possible before the falling snow would completely make it impossible and too risky to drive.

The camp owners of Chandratal had the best idea of driving on such roads. They abused our vehicle and the driver first and then tried to help but in vain. Our vehicle had to be pushed aside so that the remaining vehicles could pass.

We were asked to shift to other vehicles. This time, I was in slippers not even in my sandals since my shoes had got totally wet the previous day at lake. With 2 heavy bags in hand, slipper on feet and confusion in mind, I fell flat on the snow. All fine, just checked … the bag was open and the wallet was missing. For sometime, I tried to look around then calculated my survival chances and left the idea of money. That was my true awakening 😉

After all these back and forth actions, getting on a vehicle then getting down, walking on snow and in water, pushing the vehicle and then pulling it aside, we were told that it was too late now. Snow was too much and it was risky for vehicles to go ahead. Even the vehicles that had gone ahead were stuck.

So, we had to walk back to the tent.

https://www.traveljaunts.in/wp-content/uploads/2019/09/Chandratal-day-part-2.mp4

It was state of delirium for me. Bharti was down, she decided not to enter the camp but wait outside. Asha too wasn’t in great shape due to her half hearted sleep in the tent last night. The only person who could take a nap in such chaos was Sapna.

Being the poor organizer of this tour, I decided to walk again on the snow in my slippers to talk to the one man police near our camp area who had the satellite phone. Asking for phone was futile. I was told,’wait till evening for information from Kaza, anyway the camps have enough supplies for next 30 days.’

Chandratal after the snowfall – within hrs goats had nothing left to eat

Luckily, sun god came to give some respite. By noon, the snow started melting, the road cleared a bit and Chaman’s vehicle too started with some push and pull by other vehicles. Despite being not sure about the vehicle or Chaman, we still took chance. Lost wallet was the last thing on my mind, I was only saying ,’ God I surrender to your will.’

Chaman stopped the vehicle only at Batal, no breaks . And hurray we were alive!

In this close to a 30 minute journey from Chandratal to Batal, we had easily crossed 5-6 water streams, ditched hundreds of falling stones on the road due to the snow meltdown, skipped a few breaths and missed God like never before.

At Batal, we got to know that Manali road was closed due to couple of landslides ahead. No one had the exact idea as there was no communication. Since it was already evening, none of the vehicles could take chance of driving ahead so the locals suggested to stay put at Batal for the night.

This news made life worse for many sensitive travelers. They all had just realized their own life’s importance for their families. This is another awakening that happens in such trips. You not only start loving your own life but also start fantasizing about how important you are for others and what they would do without you.

Though there were many who cried in Batal but the main character of this melancholy scene was a bong women from Kolkata, a solo traveler. She even anticipated that her father would get hospitalized and her husband would reach asylum without any news of her. Commendable! Infact, she even made sure that everyone on this route from fellow travelers to locals who face such things every year knew about her painful story.

I couldn’t afford to express anything other than arrange for the food and tents as the dependency was on one camp, one shabby guesthouse and two small dhabas for so many of us stuck at Batal. It was already 18th Aug and in no way we could catch our flight from Chandigarh on 19th, when Manali itself was a distant dream.

Good thing, in Batal I found my wallet inside the suitcase. With money in hand now, I bought warm socks and gloves to survive another tent night. Thankfully the highway dhaba there, did keep all this stuff too.

Morning view from our tents at Batal the next day

Next day, JCB was supposed to come from Kaza to clear the highway. Till 11 am, there was no scene but vehicles started to move ahead to wait near the landslide. This route from Batal to Chantru was the worst and has always been.

We asked Chaman if the vehicle would go. Chaman showed confidence for the first time,’ I won’t stop the vehicle till Manali’. Mountain Dew or Old Monk effect, don’t know.

Spana was worried that our vehicle shouldn’t be the last vehicle on road since if we were to get stuck for some reason, there would be no one behind to help. We did start before others but just a few meters into our mission and Sapna realized that she had forgotten her bag.

We had to go back. Fears too come true. Now we became the last vehicle on the adventure. As we continued, some 1.5-2 kms ahead, our vehicle took its last breath and stopped for the final time.

Sapna and I immediately got down from the vehicle and started waving and screaming at the vehicles in front of us. There were two ahead of us but only one stopped and agreed to help. They were some boys from Delhi who were on this road trip in a zoom car.

We left the luggage & our vehicle and Chaman there itself and somehow fitted ourselves in the other vehicle to get to the landslide point where we could find help from others.

As soon as we reached, to my luck I found one vehicle which was going empty till Manali. It belonged to Mr. Shiv Raj Bodh, the owner of Moon lake Camps, Chandratal. He was coming from Kaza. The biggest helper and the God send person for us.

He was the hero of this scene. He even agreed to come back with me to the place where our vehicle was stuck to get the luggage while others waited at the landslide point.

By noon, the road opened for the adventure ahead. Bharti and I got into the backseat of Mr Shiv Raj Bodh’s 4 by 4 vehicle along with our luggage . Sapna and Asha stayed in the same zoom car with Delhi boys.

The route from Batal to Chatru was nothing less than a dream sequence, it definitely crossed all limits of an unforgiving adventurous terrain. On top of that Mr. Shiv Raj bodh was the Michael Schumacher of Spiti region.

Throughout, I kept reiterating the movie dialogue from Jab we met movie

‘ Babaji ab please is trip ko boring bana do ji.’

This is what am talking about- The complete route from Batal to Chatru was similar or worse.

After the ride of our lives,’ we reached Chatru by late afternoon. At Chatru, another news – Two more landslides, the road itself got washed off so it would take days.

Chatru is where the Police made an entry into the scene by evening. They said,’ Go back to Kaza and stay there till things improve’.

We were almost 150 people stuck in Chatru. Bikers, trekkers, our women group, some solo travelers, a malyalam movie crew including the leading actress Manju Warrier and a few foreigners. Our bong girl said,’ we would die and not go back’.

Hrs of discussion with the police resulted in all of us getting a chance to speak on their satellite phone to atleast inform our families that we were alive. In the meantime I had already arranged for the tents from India hikes base camp so that in worst case we would have some place to spend the night.

And it was the worst case, we had to spend another night in the camps you can see below.

Another night being stuck in Chatru due to landslide – Our camps

Next morning was beautiful but none of us was really able to enjoy and acknowledge the beauty around. And how could we? Our Sapna was still struggling with her stomach infection and the biggest wish of her life was a comfortable loo at this point.

By 9 am, there was an ambulance in Chatru which had come from Kaza and some additional officials for rescue operations. We were told, the only way out was to walk, trek and cross the landslide.

In desperation, we decided to do that but we had luggage and a lot of it. Finally we got a govt vehicle to drop us along with our luggage till the landslide point. This was the scene there.

Thanks to all the saviors especially Mr. Shiv Raj bodh, his friend (who had reached the scene already) and our govt vehicle driver among many others who helped us cross the landslide area along with our luggage.

A Govt bus was waiting on the other side of the landslide area to help the trapped tourist reach Manali. We took a sigh and boarded the bus. Atleast now we would reach Manali…

Just a little further ahead of Rohtang pass another scene awaited us.

Landslide near Madhi on Manali Rohtang highway

Landslide before Madhi and we were stranded again. Thankfully, at least the phone network was there. Most of us got down from the bus to make calls. The next day that is 21st Aug was my husband’s birthday. Since there was no way I could reach Bangalore I decided to make arrangements from there itself.

The hero of this scene was a regular truck driver who overheard me telling my neighbor friend,’ I might not be able to reach Bangalore so please arrange for the cake and food.’ When I finished my call, the truck driver came up to me and said ,’ Gudiya app zaroor ghar pahunchogi’.

I was touched. It felt like the most positive message straight from heaven. This fellow was empathetic towards me, who himself has a hard life on roads. I just happened to be in that situation by chance whereas he would have faced this many times. God, your creations never cease to surprise me.

Stuck before Marhi on the way to Manali near Rohtang pass

Now getting back to getting stuck part. So we had just crossed Rohtang pass and the nearest village Madhi was 5 plus kms ahead on the highway to Manali. Being stuck in Himalayas near one of the high passes with rains and chances of snowfall is not a good feeling.

In sometime it got dark and started to drizzle too. Babaji had decided not to make this trip boring at all. By 8 pm all the hopes to reach Manali died down as even the JCB stopped working.

We were to spend the cold night in the bus. The only respite was that we could talk to our families in our last moments. No water, no food and no blankets.

The hero of this night scene was Neeratram, our bus driver, who decided to trek downhill till Madhi Dhabas to get food and water for all the passengers in the bus. Some brave bikers too joined him as the rain subsided. That night we ate post midnight.

Morning came with another challenge ,’ the loo challenge’. Instead of waiting for the landslide to get cleared, we decided to leave the luggage in the bus and trek downhill till Madhi and take a vehicle from there for Manali.

I went ahead assuming everyone to follow but only Sapna came down. Bharti and Asha went back to the bus and decided to wait for the road to open rather than trek downhill. On the highway down, we got lift from a small cattle carrying truck.

I would never forget those 5kms, the surface literally created dents on my bum.

Once in Madhi, I started looking for another vehicle to go to Manali and got a shared vehicle after some additional circus.

Now the story should end right? but no..at Gulaba just before Manali there was 4-5 kms of traffic jam. Sapna and I got down from the vehicle along with other locals and started to walk downhill taking short cuts. The locals had called the vehicle to the point where the jam ended so we tagged along.

Finally, by 2 pm this ordeal ended when we reached Manali. Gosh!

About the other two? So once the landslide area got cleared a bit, they also took lifts in smaller vehicles as the bus wasn’t allowed to cross till evening and reached Manali by 4 pm comfortably.

That day, we ate like there was no tomorrow and laughed at every incident like it was so much fun.

Not sure about others but I were to ask myself

Will this deter me from traveling or taking such trips? I would say no

Secondly, will this discourage me from organizing tours in Spiti valley?

I would still say no because no other tour can offer such ROI… Within 10 days you learn from camping to trekking to crossing streams to walking on snow to taking the roller coaster rides to ditching bolders and to surviving on kadhi chawal, rajma chawal, bread anda and maggi . Last but not the least, free weight loss is complimentary 🙂

Ready for the next adventure with me girls?

Spiti valley tour- One hell of a trip to Govt forsaken places ! Not exaggerating. Each word in this photo story about my Spiti travel is true and have lived every moment along with the other women in our group.

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