#bring me more catholic guilt pls
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greenqueenhightower · 5 months ago
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The scene at the sept with Alicent lighting three candles as Rhaenyra lights a funeral pyre is the highlight of the episode for me. Alicent and Rhaenyra are so intertwined in each other's psyches and I loved that detail. It was also interesting to see Alicent's inner conflict and religious torment since she recognized that her family, and to an extent her own actions, have caused Rhaenyra's pain and suffering and she needed to atone for this.
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sunnysideaeggs · 5 months ago
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uuuuh okay thoughts about S2E1 (disclaimer: SPOILERS! and some unpopular opinions bc i WILL be criticizing alicent). most of these i had during my watch yesterday, and now i’m elaborating on them after more thinking about it. looooong post ahead
okay i liked the new intro. i will miss the blood pouring but i think the tapestries are a more visual way to convey targaryen history.
my favorite parts were the shot of vhagar and balerion in the field of fire(? idk they were eating men (green dragon black dragon !!!), the jaehaerys and alysanne portrait, alicent and rhaenyra and aegon and rhaenyra crowned side by side. beautiful.
also, the blood beneath the thread !!! targaryen history is written in blood. never forget this.
i dont particularly like jace being at the wall. it makes little sense to me, especially because the north is massive and i don’t think that cregan would like to make a procession to the wall just because a prince is there. i liked the tidbits though: jon going to the watch is a tradition he followed unknowingly :)
show me more political jace please, he’s cool.
‘surely torrhen would’ve rather died instead of bending the knee unless he believed aegon could bring unity to the 7K’ jace pls 💀
it’s funny that in one scene rhaenys and daemon had more tension and chemistry than all the scenes of daemon with adult rhaenyra. maybe what he needs is a GILF to put him in his place? lmao
LAENA MENTION LETS GOOOOO
‘make it a son for a son’ referring to aemond? alicent has no bone to pick here be fr i can smell bleach for the whitewashing a mile away
i also have issue with the writers’ choice of making rhaenyra ignore her physical needs and spend apparently days riding on dragon back and doing jumps and that when she just had a miscarriage. it’s canon that she was in bed rest for half a year because the loss of visenya took a toll on her body. it will be dumb and criticized if she’s fine to disappear for weeks but not to fight.
alyn velaryon? ok i’m mad bc corlys literally knows this dude is his son ???
i love how we all pretend that corlys and rhaenys were particularly interested in the strong boys. idk i can’t really care about that anymore
ow is helaena sewing alicent a dress? please tell me it’s not a shroud
AEGON APPEARED WOOO 🍳✨
‘where’s jaehaerys? where are his lessons?’ my man doesn’t know to what school his kids go lol
also he can recognize the twins apart with only seeing them :)✨ cute
aegon wanted jaehaerys in his council !!!! he’s making sure jae KNOWS he’s his heir and he’s on aegon’s mind
oh hel is comfortable enough with him to tell him about her prophecies, i’m just afraid that no one understand her
‘the rats’ NOOOOO
aegon is always like ‘😐❔’ around her lol
‘the queen is an enduring mystery’ he’s a poet i love him
alicole pussyeating but at what cost
why does criston has that empty look in his eyes, he had the same look in his scene with rhaenyra
where is all the raw emotion between them from last season? it’s giving cersei and lancel when it should be cersei and jaime. no deep gazes, no catholic guilt, something’s amiss
jaehaerys and egg </3 my feels they’re so cute
okay i have a bone to pick here because why is tyland being treated like a joke? i can get past jaehaerys toying with him because he’s a child, but aegon respected his allies (that’s a big part about him) and would never antagonize them in that way. it’s given rhaenyra and lady redwyne when we know both characters differ the most in the way they treat their subjects.
also, this is TYLAND LANNISTER, the most employed guy ever. he literally put his skin on the fire for his team, he’s loyal and he’s the best ally the greens could’ve asked for. if anyone is to thank for the death of the dragons, it’s him. put some respect on his name because this is the finance bro to end all finance bros.
also he’s always saying important things: the treasure in the green council, jason’s moves here. please listen to him!
another thing i dislike is the way important political moves are being brushed off. the treasure is a big big matter. it should be said explicitly what the council is doing about it being the focus of the scene. i’m sure most casual viewers didn’t catch that the comedic relief is making big money moves that will backfire later.
but anyways jaehaerys is so cute hehe
happy father’s day to aegon targaryen and aegon targaryen only
okay i’m rewatching the jaehaerys and tyland scene and i love tyland’s accent, and how polite he is to the little prince
go aemond in the council !!!
‘you do not have a seat in this council’ okay alicent please stfu. i disliked her demeanor since she was chastising aegon and tyland but this is too much. remember you do not have a seat either.
and no she doesn’t: she’s queen mother, not queen regent. aegon is an able adult and can rule without her help. i know the only council we had was with cersei but that’s because joffrey and tommen were under westeros’ age of majority. that alicent is there is out of aegon’s kindness and the council members’ respect.
also why would she be mad that the brothers are brothering ??? girl you wanted them to be on each other’s side
SUNFYRE MENTION LETS GOOOO
‘we must proceed cautiously’ i think all caution must be thrown overboard here. i know they want to portray A/R as the ‘voices of reason’ being pushed to war and all but sometimes violence is necessary to prevent more violence. what tywin said about murdering a dozen people in a dinner and a thousand in battle.
i’m tired of this aemond slander. he did it, but he’s innocent your grace
why larys kinda…
ok i love his voice
oh so now every move of alicent is seen by larys. she knows that he knows. neat.
why do the handmaidens wear green? they should wear gold ☀️
okay i initially thought syrax was sunfyre because of the pink of his wings. i hope sunfyre is golden smh
it’s neat that we remember than no matter what side we’re on, for the common people dragons are a source of fear and caution. the fishermen are loyal to rhaenyra yet they will run away from her when she’s on syrax because they don’t trust a dragon.
rhaenyra’s pain is so deep, i really empathized with her. absolutely devastating. her expression, her grabbing the cape, everything
emma is so fucking talented for real, making me feel for the death of a character i dislike
(oh how the mourning of a woman for her child will cause thousands of mothers mourning their children the same)
‘aegon the magnanimous’ when your homie gives you a ridiculous nickname
my boy sits and listens to his subjects, calls them by their names and tells them not to be afraid. hello jerard what can i do 4 u? :)
i love how egg is like ‘yea whatever take ur sheep jerard pls like me’
okay i dislike otto here. aegon is obviously into crowd pleasing (a secret tool that will be useful later) and for once it’s okay. jerard will go home with his sheep and be a diehard aegon supporter and raise his kids to be the same, tell his friends about the king’s generosity. i think otto should know better than to angry the population in time of war, even if you can’t make the flock whole, give the man grain or coin so he can feed his family and the effort of going to the king’s house.
hugh? like hugh hammer? ooooh
‘our victory depends on the efforts of the smallfolk’ close enough welcome back princess diana
another otto slander moment here. i don’t think it’s wise to chastise the king (an adult, mind you) and putting himself in between of aegon and the court like that. did we saw otto with viserys? he sat by his side and whispered his advice in a discreet manner. he didn’t try and strongarmed his king in front of dozens of people. that’s not a smart way of doing things. it’s called soft power for a reason
also, i think the directors were trying to make otto parallel tywin in that joffrey in the throne scene, but tywin was explicitly trying to get joffrey to be more involved in the council and the two were alone. give it to aegon, let him have his fun in public and manipulate him in private, that is the way. doing dumb shit like that only makes aegon look like a kid and otto like a shameless powergrabbing dude
one thing i appreciate is that aegon has his own court. he has his lads-in-waiting, he has a few ladies following behind, and that’s how a king should be. we always saw the royal kids isolated (joff, tommen, rhaenyra only had alicent) when in reality most important people will have a flock of people accompanying them every day.
now that’s what i’m talking about. larys is all about being subtle, honey trapping his way to power. that’s how the game of thrones is played. while aegon will not agree with him just like that (because larys gives him the oogies), i’m sure he will remember larys’ words.
‘as viserys wished’ oh don’t speak of him fuck what he wants
an ally would not sit there and cut her legs at the table of men? girl you do that yourself
alicent, the problem is not otto undermining you, is both of you yapping about shit aegon and aemond not care about and winning empty victories lol
aegon will probably forget about jerard next episode, but will not forget feeling his wings being cut by otto. aemond remained in the council room but will remember alicent wanting him gone.
i wish alicent and otto believed more on their kids/grandkids
mysaria apparition yay
‘you speak of highborn games, i am common born’ tell him girl
daemon don’t put your hands on women challenge: impossible
chemistry with mysaria? uuuuh
i love how everyone reminds erryk of arryk like ‘ayo where ur bro at?’ a matching set is not matching, it’s giving the parent trap
‘i want aemond targaryen’ okay at least she knows who to blame. i want to see more of vengeful rhaenyra, let women be mad
daemon going for aemond instead of for jaehaerys is such a cheap move smh, whitewashing at its finest
jaecarys and rhaenyra :(
is it too insensitive to say that jace’s hair looks great? you’re serving cunt? your brother just died and you’re serving cunt?
ow alerie florent :((((
FUCK VISERYS TARGARYEN
i really like the symbolic funeral. that shot of rhaena crying over the fire? chills
is it me or they changed joffrey’s actor? idk
uuuuh alicent idk if that’s empathy or weakness 🙃
once again i don’t think it’s neat that they show blood being a normal goldcloak. he was discharged dishonorably for femicide. be honest
cheese’s actor kinda looks like joaquin phoenix
‘i want aemond targaryen’ i hate this fucking show.
ROSBY AND STOKEWORTH MENTION LETS GOOO
criston agreeing with aemond in private but backing alicent in public is the medieval version of ‘yea kid ur right but i don’t wanna fight with your mom’
criston looks so tired :(
‘her grace speaks with two tongues’ SAY YOUR TRUTH AEMOND
it is vain to try and blame aemond for starting the war when the war was brewing since before he was born. rhaenyra wouldn’t give up her claim, daemon wouldn’t accept it. if rhaenyra ascended, the targtowers die. there’s not another version of this story
‘she holds love for our enemy, that makes her a fool’ that makes her a traitor. especially after the events of tonight. do we think rhaenyra has a designated green supporter that tries to get her to the green’s side? why would the greens have a rhaenyra cheerleader then?
gods forbid something happens and otto is not there 🙄 control freak
i like how they’re making aemond more rage-filled. careful ewan your book!aemond is showing
‘aegon the strong’ ‘my nephews have already taken that one’ but egg 💀💀💀
i really love how aegon has his court. he’s protected by the throne’s swords AND his homies got his back
the true king can sit however he likes. he lounges on the swords and they’re as soft as pillows to him. pretenders can’t relate.
in a deeper level, it shows how he’s comfortable both in the throne and surrounded by people. he has high trust. kinghood is a tool he doesn’t have any training on but he holds it like a natural
aegon truly trusts aemond. i love that for them. if they make aemond to be treacherous i’ll cry
AEGON THE DRAGONCOCK 🐲 rip leon estermont you would’ve loved shitposting
also why the ratcatchers are just walking around the keep? are they in the tunnels or in plain sight?
the kick to the doggie :( i really hope they didn’t really kick a dog for that
unrelated but i really need the rats around the red keep to mean something like larys skinchanging into them. they can’t be a red herring or just blood and cheese. they have too many shots
again, why are they out and about? isn’t it weird to see dudes in the middle of the night?
helaena’s maid looks like emma stone and she has really good eyebrows. i’m pretty sure she knows something (larys agent ofc)
how do we go from searching for aemond to threatening helaena? whyyyyyyy
oh right we had to blame the smallfolk for being soooo greedy and wicked and stupid that you tell them kill a great warrior and they kill a baby. because daemon can’t ever order a baby killed amiright?
the little beds noooooo :( baby jaehaerys
okay i was expecting more of helaena. in the books she’s described as pleading, begging, crying and so on. phia is killing it with the eye expressions but she looks stiff in comparison with only her necklace. even trying to bargain more (my husband can give you everything and more), some more tears, some stuttering would fit show!helaena’s too. that’s on the directors tho
i also dislike the choice that anyone can just barge in the room, literally they had to make the castle desert instead of blood and cheese waiting for hel in alicent’s rooms. i know someone is going to make the point of ‘why didn’t helaena scream or run?’ and yes partly. guess we had to slander alicent in another way right?
but alas, i am thankful that a prediction of the scene didn’t came true: no children being forcefully stripped. that would’ve sent me over the edge. they implied it but no child actors were harmed in this episode
omg the sounds of the head cutting and jaehaerys’ muffled sounds i wanna cry
helaena is so lost and the castle is a maze and nobody’s there and she’s lost lost lost and running with jaehaera i can’t
did she saw a vision there? when she stopped and went to alicent’s room
imagine going to comfort for your mom and she’s at it
‘return to your post lord commander’ why didn’t you criston? 🙃
also it didn’t pass me by that aegon has THREE kingsguards in addition to his four homies and his own sword. helaena had none. even if he was off duty and he’s sworn to alicent and not helaena, the lord commander is not commanding
THREE maids at the start of the episode doing absolutely nothing and none here? i’m so mad
‘they killed the boy’ :(((((
also why is helaena so disconnected? like why is she ‘able’ or is she in shock? i hope if they don’t make her go insane with pain like in the book she gets a revenge arc where she goes on dreamfyre, she deserves it.
i hope aegon kills them all.
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fettuccin-e · 11 months ago
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I am high as fuck rn and I started getting all mushy and emotional abt my catholic upbringing and like losing faith and THEN I started getting emotional abt sweet Frankie and then I just started writing and this is horribly unedited and written in prob like 5 minutes pls be nice to me i am fragile lol (there is like a lot blasphemy in this and also cunnilingus just be warned hehe)
~~~
Frankie doesn’t pray much these days. His mamá raised him in the eye of the Lord, church every Sunday in his very best, hands folded in front of him. Christmas masses, Easter Sundays.
After he went into Delta, he lost sight of God, of everything he’d ever gleaned from the old dusty bibles laying around his childhood home. Any semblance of faith wiped away and replaced with blood on his hands, a gun braced against his shoulder. Faith was beaten out of him and replaced with blind patriotism before he too was left behind. Forced to return to society broken and used and hopeless.
But you. You showed him different, showed him how to live again. You found him, a broken man working to leave behind a drug-addled past, with a daughter visiting every other weekend and an ex-wife wanting nothing to do with him.
He finds it funny that you met him just outside of a church, at the Salvation Army store the next building over. Trash bags full of old clothes weighing down your shoulders, a grateful smile when he offered to help. And he swears, in that moment, he saw a glimpse of God in your smile.
And in the months since that day, between countless dates and fights and sex and sweet kisses in the morning light, Frankie thinks he finds faith again.
Frankie doesn’t pray much anymore, except between your thighs.
In the evening quiet, crickets chirping outside and soft sounds coming from the old television in your living room, Frankie finds salvation on his knees.
He whispers his prayers in sweet nothings against your skin, begging you for love, for your patience, for your saving grace. You’re happy to provide, a far more loving god than the one he grew up believing in.
He drinks up the wetness of your cunt like the blood of Christ, relishing in the taste of you on his tongue. You’re soft and sweet and forgiving.
You absolve his sins with your fingers curling through his hair, your praise filtering in his ears. He devotes his mind, his body, his soul to you as you suck in air through your teeth, letting him bring you to orgasm over and over and over again.
This is his penance, his confession. No priest or military general can hurt him here. He is safe, he is not alone.
So when you tug him up from between your legs to meet him in a soft, slow kiss, Frankie finally feels free. Free of pain and suffering, of responsibility and guilt.
He doesn’t mind if heaven waits for him after death, as long as he gets this one life with you.
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the anti-rafe’s wheel of time is so obvious bc they only ever bring up how the men are failed by the story
“Rand is the dragon not Egwene! He should be the most special and powerful!” a) Plus, pretty sure they’re building his OPness by giving u other powerful ppl to compare him to, and b) where did all the arguments that the women are powerful “in a different way” go? Hm? Did Egwene not use her weaves effectively instead of trying to raw power against a forsaken? Hm? I understand Liandrin is the bad guy, but she did tell u it isn’t all about raw power
“Mat is ruined! Where’s his moral compass!!! Why is he useless!!” oh you mean poisoned by the dagger for almost three whole books would sooner run from a battle than face it disgusted by Rand’s magicalness at every turn bc he’s watching his normal life go up in flames Mat? That Mat? Honestly, if anything, the show actively pushed you to like Mat this season, in an attempt to recover from what show onlys would see as treachery when Barney left the cast and forced a story nobody could prepare for!
“Perrin’s done nothing! He’s practically not even a character!” Whoooooo boy, you guys. Lemme tell you. Of the three male leads, perrin is literally the most tangible in the show. We watch him lose a loved one by his own hand, and proceed to ask everyone and their mother how to be a good person, on top of actively searching for the horn, learning more about the wolf brother stuff AND save ppl whenever he can. Perrin is literally the most grounded, most relatable male lead. Every show only I’ve seen react to the series agonises over his entire life. Rand and Mat? So personal, internal and otherworldly in their issues, Perrin feels centred. His arc feels palpable bc we got to see him physically lose someone. People can conceptualise his pain! He’s the people’s hero! He’s not fantastical, esp. given his wolf-forest-animal stuff, it’s a very catholic guilt like guilt you’d be surprised how that permeates a story. Which! Which! Book! Accurate!
(I wrote this on the go so if it isn’t very well argued/thought out pls try not to nitpick me. Trust the general thing I’m getting at).
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thebisexualwreckoning · 2 months ago
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I think a lot of it might also stem from islamophobia and and the thought process that being muslim and being queer are diametrically opposed. like, a lot of white queers have asked me how i can be both religious and queer and it almost seems to me that they conceptualise someone who has a healthy relationship with religion and happens to be queer. and like, i don't even face the religious discrimination that harshly because hinduism is in general more accepted then islam but still, a lot of people on tumblr seem to think that religious guilt is either a. christian and b. something you need to have if you are queer.
It's almost as if they cannot imagine armand as having a healthy relationship with religion because surely if my religion didn't let me be gay then muslim people also can't be gay. it's not like he could have found comfort in religion because religion and queerness definitely isn't intrinsically linked for some people, amiright?
And i bring up the general islamophobia fact because you never see people talking about louis and his struggles with catholicism and being a gay black man in the 20s. like, armand being muslim while being a major part of his character, hasn't really been that important up until now (I mean, it is a big driving factor behind his actions if you pay attention but i'm talking casual viewing sense) while louis' struggles with religion and his guilt over paul's death has been the single reason behind the entire show occurring. none of this would have happened if louis did not feel immense guilt and hatred for himself and his identity due to being raised catholic and thus being unable to accept himself.
but yeah, i just find it funny how people choose to focus on armand being muslim and how even if he isn't lying about being muslim, they think he could never be comfortable with it (which i am not disagreeing with. i do think armand also struggles with religious guilt and that it also influences his actions) while louis, a character who has been showed on screen as struggling with religion and his queer/vampiric nature has that part of him almost erased. like i've seen a lot of the St Louis parallels and lestat viewing louis as an almost godlike figure (which i heavily fuck with btw. pls keep it up) but a lot of those viewings don't interact with how louis personally feels about religion. louis is allowed to be venerated as a saint and be a figure connected with religion because christianity is a more palatable form of religious representation to the white audiences of the show.
Anyway, this got way to long, but if any of my muslim iwtv mutuals/fans want to, pls feel free to jump in with your opinions as well! mine are of course only representative of my experience with religion as a hindu queer person and i've probably missed a lot of nuances in here that muslim people will better be able to explain.
I know not everyone has read the books or cares about what happens in the books and thats VALID. But it is important to me that ppl know how insane it sounds to say that Armand is lying about being muslim
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moon-kn1ght · 3 years ago
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a prayer.
pairing: matt murdock x fem!reader
 word count: 1.2k warnings: LOTSO Religious symbolism/images; there are prayers said; (if this might upset you, pls do not read); catholic guilt; dom/sub vibes; reader is tied up; sensory play; wax play; basic af p in v; no y/n; 
a/n: this is inspired by the work Psalm by VigilanteAvocado on Ao3 in 2015. i read that and immediately YES MORE so i did this. shout out to that catholic guilt, really powered this piece home. thank you to my wife @wyn-n-tonic for helping me avoid the word "slide" and big thank you to @louderrthanthunderr for bringing me into the daredevil fandom at its resurgence -- this piece is dedicated to you <3 (happy christmas) read more on my masterlist
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You knew he wasn’t the most devout Catholic. At least in the traditional sense.
Like you, he sat in the back rows at Mass. He’d always enter close to the start of the introductory rites, obviously not wanting to make small talk (or not get roped into the New York Young Adult Catholics ministry team). (You too).
He did Wednesdays, not Sundays. He had his habits.
You noticed him before he noticed you (at least you think). It was only after Easter that you saw him looking in your general direction. You had assumed he was looking at you (later you would be proven wrong).
That night, as you were walking out, he approached you. You had thought he left after communion was served.
“Hey.” – he’s simple, catching your attention. It still spooks you, though, thinking you’d made it out of the gauntlet of people asking you to attend the social (re: singles meet & greet) after mass.
“Oh–fu–hey, I’m sorry. Hi.”
“Wow, didn’t you just come from Mass? Already building that list for confession?”
You cover your face with your hands, “Mhm, yep. It’s a bad habit, one that decades of ‘Hail Mary’s’ has not been able to break.”
“I’m Matt,” he offers and you give him your name in return. “So, we both survived the Easter crowds.”
It began with a critique of that night’s homily, then became drinks, then inviting him into your bed that night. A romance from church? No one’s grandma could be prouder (just make sure to leave out the juicier details).
That night he left while you were asleep, so you didn’t get his number. But then next Wednesday, he was sitting in your pew at Mass. And yes, he did end up in your bed again.
Matt’s favorite way to have you? Tied up and blindfolded.
“To level the playing field,” he’d joke. Not that you ever complained.
One time, Matt made you say the Act of Contrition when a tangle of profanity (including a lot of G-d fuck) tumbled out of your lips when you came on his face.
“It’s only right,” he smiled. That planted a seed for him. To him, faith could be explored (and exploited) in more engaging ways.
“Do you feel secure?”
“Green.”
“Good girl–” His adoration sends a tingle across your skin. Anticipation ices your body in goosebumps. “We’re going to play a game tonight, does that sound good?” You think you can feel his hand smoothing out the sheet at the foot of the bed, but his voice sounds closer to you than that.
“Yes Matt.”
“I want you to start praying.” His words bounce off the walls of the room and ring in your ears. “While you pray, I will touch you. When you stop, I stop.”
Oh.
“Can you do that for me?”
Fucking hell Murdock. Now would this truly be considered exploration? Or was this exploitation? Either way, you are all in.
“Yes Matt.”
Matt licks his lips. He can already smell your arousal at this proposition. “Whenever you’re ready.”
You swallow deeply. One thought tracks across the front of your mind: you are so going to hell for this. With an inhale you begin, “Let us remember;”
Matt joins you on the refrain as he sinks his knees into the mattress at your side, “that we are in the Holy Presence of God.” He chuckles and readjusts the positions of your thighs.
“Glory to the Father and to the Son and to the Holy Spirit.”
He leans down and kisses your hip. “As it was in the beginning…” He lets his lips drag across the center of your stomach, stopping just short of your [pubic bone] as you finish the Glory Be. A small sound escapes your mouth as you feel his hot breath so close to where you want it.
His body shifts next to yours and you can hear the unmistakable scratch-click-hshhh of a lighter. You twist your wrists in the restraints and dig your fingernails into your palms for some grounding.
“I’m not hearing anything.”
You can smell something – he’s lit a candle, you smell the wick burning. But the candle doesn’t have a specific scent, all you get is the slight smokiness of the fabric string burning.
“Hail Mary, full of grace–” you continue and he immediately replaces his hand against your hip.
“The Lord is with the–” Matt leans into your chest and trails light kisses down your collarbone. His lips blaze a fiery trail across your skin.
Your own words, holy words, ring loudly in your ears but are in reality, barely above a whisper. Matt adds to the quiet cacophony with “I love hearing you say these things for me.” He grazes his teeth against your nipple. “I’m going to add an intense feeling, if you don't want me to just stop speaking.”
Your whispered prayer becomes a plead for more with “Blessed is the fruit of thy womb;”
“Good girl,” he coos with his mouth wrapped around your breast.
It’s not the first time you two have played with wax, one can definitely call it a ‘habit’ of Matt. Still, when the first drip of wax hits your skin, unexpectedly, sharply, you gasp your words. “Holy Mary” becomes a shrill choke for air, of which your lungs are suddenly deprived of.
Matt loves these noises, the visceral way your body responds to foreign sensations when you’re so out of control.
More drips of wax have you writhing in your restraints, practically chanting the final line of “now and at our hour of death, Amen.”
“Matt, please–” you cry.
“I’m here,” his hand gasps yours, “Tell me what you need.” His voice sounds so desperate, almost as wrecked as yours.
“–I need you. I need to feel you.”
Matt unties your hands and you immediately cling to him, wrapping one arm around his shoulders and nestling the other into his hair.
But you don’t stop the prayers, begging quietly for more of him. You whimper the Our Father into his neck as he pushes inside of you. His thrusts bring your bodies closer together, closer to being one. Near your climax, you hear familiar words on his lips.
He whispers against your skin, “Purify me and I shall be clean; Wash me and I shall be whiter than snow.”
Your words cut against each other like rival tides pulling on a shore –
“-- Create in me a clean heart –”
“-- lead us not into temptation,”
The knot in your center tightens and breaks, cutting the stream of your words into a tumble of “yes, G-d yes.”
His thrusts become quicker as you come down from your high, his words muttered. “Deliver me, O God of my salvation–” and he buries himself deep inside you as he too finds his climax.
It’s not until the two of you are curled up in bed later that night do you joke, “Now, how are we supposed to explain that one in confession this week?”
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undermattsun-archive · 4 years ago
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baptismal
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(skate rat) sakusa kiyoomi x fem!reader | w.c 1.5k
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a/n: man idk more sacrilege, touch of inspo from linsanity’s sexual baptism tag, so thank u @sugardaddykenma + @pomsuki said dick suckin and here we r♡.. btw apologies if the ending seems sudden? i rlly didn’t wanna write a full smut again....am a lil burnt out from that i rlly wanted to just write the...water boarding.......and spitting
dedicated to @dymphnasprose my sacrilege chaos soulmate (thx for reading this 4 me twice smoochies)
18+ university age | pls read warnings
tw sacrilegious, tw dubcon, tw dacryphilia, tw humiliation, tw degradation, tw breathplay, tw choking, tw spitting, tw waterboarding (not really?), tw mean mean mean sakusa is mean (but like reader is kind of into it)
tw miki is once again making terrible use of her catholic upbringing :’)
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A sharp pain slices up your spine as your back is slammed against your desk, hands flying up to desperately grip at the Sakusa shoulders, his tongue continuing it’s ruthless search of your mouth.
“C-Can’t.” You shove at his chest, gasping for air, trying not to let the disappointed click of his tongue wear down on you. You risk a glance up to meet his eyes, flinching at the darkened look settled upon his face.
He slams his hands down on the desk, shoving his face close-up to yours, scrutinizing eyes picking apart your features.
“Disgusting,” He muses, making your eyes widen and water, “don’t cry now, you’re the one who invited me up here.” He brushes a finger under your eye, a cruel smile rendering the gesture sarcastic, mocking. With a tilt of his head he tightens a grip on your jaw and pulls you into another unforgiving kiss.
You can’t help but whimper into his mouth, delighting in the soft groan he lets out in response. He presses his body against yours, forcing you against the rigid desk and books scattered across. Your back arches in a desperate attempt to relieve the sharp pain prodding at you. He bucks his hips against you, shoving a hand under your shirt as your head slams into the window above your desk.
“Ow Omi!” He swallows down the complaint the hand slipped under your shirt crawling up your torso and closing around your throat, the loose grip branding itself against your flesh.
“Quiet.” His teeth dig into your bottom lip, as you mumble another complaint against him, fingers digging into his shoulder as he grinds against you, the growing bulge in his pants making your mouth water. “Off.” He tugs at the waist of your pants, annoyance permeating the air.
He makes no effort to give you any leeway to properly tug off your bottoms, you wriggle around beneath him, shrinking under the impatient glare he’s focusing on you. His hand shoots out to yank down your pants, knocking your head against the window and books and papers to fall off your desk. Your hand shoots out to try to catch some of the falling debris, only able to catch the translucent, white bottle of holy water your parents had shoved into your hands before leaving you in your apartment.
“To keep you cleansed of sin.” They had whispered. 
Before you can set it back down onto the desk, Sakusa plucks it from your fingers, focusing eyes scanning over the bottle, thumbing over the golden crucifix fixed to the front. 
“What’s this?” He mutters popping the cap open and sniffing it, eyebrows furrowing at the lack of scent.
“Holy water.” You reply tugging at his shirt, trying to bring his attention back to you. Hooking up with Sakusa was one of your guiltiest pleasures, and seeing it being derailed by a reminder of your religious upbringing was nothing short of grating.
“What’s it for?” He scoffs, shutting the cap again to look back into your eyes. His expression is painfully blank, forcing a huff from your lips.
“I don’t know my parents gave it, keep me clean or something,” You lean back against the desk, continuing to ignore the textbooks stabbing into you, “c’mon Omi, it’s not important.”
“Clean?” His gaze flickers back and forth between you and the bottle, the hand resting upon your throat tightening for a second before dragging back down to grip at the hem of your shirt.
“What are you-” He drags your shirt up, pulling it taught over your face, your hands flying back up to claw at his biceps, you begin to protest, the words lost the second you feel a spray of water on the fabric over your mouth and nose, making you sputter and choke, the sensation horribly akin to drowning. You thrash your limbs against him as you feel his hand close over your mouth through the thin material of your shirt, robbing you of any chance of air.
“Dirty, fucking filthy.” He mutters as he rips your shirt off, you look up at him in bewilderment another series of protests prodding at your lips, the thought of telling him to leave blaring in your mind. “Shut the fuck up.” He grinds out as you part your lips to speak, wet fingers tangle into your hair, dragging you towards your bed, you let out a desperate whimper, the pitiful noise falling on deaf ears as Sakusa gives one particularly rough yank as he throws you onto the bed. You wipe at your face, eyes narrowing at the bottle of holy water still held loosely in Sakusa’s grip. 
“Why do you have that?” The words shake as they leave your lips, it’s all you can manage with the filthy glint in his eyes baring down on you. 
“To cleanse you.” His words are absolute, ringing through your ears as if they’re meant to save you. He unscrews the cap and tosses it aside, taking a quick swig before moving to hover over you. His fingers make their way to squeeze at your cheeks, commanding your lips fall to fall apart. Without warning he spits the water into your mouth, shifting his grip to force your mouth close. “Swallow” He commands, voice unwavering. You swallow hard, eyes watering at the way it scorches at your throat, thoughts of your past transgressions and sins weighing down as you bend to the will of the man above you.  
“Good, maybe we can make a saint out of a sinner.” He sneers, he takes another swig, spitting it at your face. You squeeze your eyes shut, squealing as the water goes up your nose, trying to move out of his hold.
“Omi this is bad. Stop it.” Your voice wavers as you rub at your face once more, trying to wick away the mixture of spit and holy water. “Th-That’s sacred.”
“Tch,” a hand closes around your throat, your own hands flying to grip at his wrist as if your hold would convince him to relent his iron grip, “isn’t sex supposed to be a sacred thing between spouses? But here you are, whoring yourself out so easily.” 
“Hnn i-it…” His eyes narrow in time with his constricting hold, head tilting as your airway is restrained further and further. The faint thought of the bruises forming falls flat as you start to gasp more, eyes fluttering shut, praying silently that Sakusa won’t make you pass out this time around. 
“So filthy.” He lets up slightly, just enough for you to breathe a little easier, but still tight enough to keep you in your place. He tips back another swig of the holy water, slamming his lips against yours, immediately letting your lips fall open as the water sloshes between your mouths, dribbling down your chin. He releases your throat, pulling away with a sharp nip to your lower lip as he pulls away, expression still painfully blank while eyes continue to glow with that shameful sense of danger. 
The lull in his unrelenting actions finally allows you to breathe, allowing you to feel the deep seated guilt of such sinful misuse of a sacred element of your faith. With wide eyes you look up at Sakusa shooting you a look that screams ‘don’t move’. A soft nod of your head offers the confirmation he didn’t care for as he dumps the rest of the water on your head. The cool water carves itself down your skin, a poor attempt at washing away the countless amount of sins you’ve committed, the countless amount you will commit as long as Sakusa Kiyoomi continues to hold a sliver of interest in you. 
Your thoughts are interrupted by the sound of a buckle being undone, immediately faced with the reddened tip of Sakusa’s cock, precum beading at the slit, the sight familiar and mouthwatering. There’s no need for him to speak, your lips are already brushing over the head, tongue darting out to lave over it. An indifferent hum is the closest you get to encouragement as you take more and more of him into your mouth. 
His fingers flick at the top of your head, a silent command to pick up the pace as he settles his palm against the back of your head. Just as your nose brushes against tight curls you pull back, setting an impossible pace for your space in the name of satisfying the man before you. You make a point to let the head of his cock ram into the back of your throat, forcing your throat to constrict and spasm. You flutter your lashes, looking up at him in hopes of a crumb of approval, a tilt of his lips to signal his satisfaction, only to earn almost disinterested eyes staring back at you.
“Enough. Spread your legs.” He tugs you off and with a hand on your face he shoves harshly, making you fall back against the bed. 
“Hey! Be care…” The demand pauses in your chest the second you meet his gaze, swearing you can see the devil in his eyes.
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bitter-post-millennial · 4 months ago
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Thank you so much for the feedback!! I know like specific points that I want to hit and I know what the oc would say but im not quite sure how to get into the other characters heads (besides Alicent, I grew up catholic and I’m ethnically Jewish so I, too, am made of guilt). I’m leaning towards naming her something based in reality btw. I looked up who the first men are and who they’re based on and they’re based on the old Celtic people of the British isles. I want to lean more towards the Pictish people not only because I find them fascinating but also because they manage to kick off the Iron Age, which is right after the Bronze Age, funnily enough. I probably phrased that incredibly ignorantly but it’s 6:09 in the morning and I just woke up.
So who are these people? Well, according to encyclopedia brittanica (I’m too tired to search for complete scholarly sources and brittanica is old reliable) they are, “an ancient people who lived in what is now eastern and north eastern Scotland.” So what I’m hearing is that she’s got a cool accent. And by ancient, I mean ANCIENT- like 297 AD ancient (this is the earliest reference I can find about them at the present). The reason why I want to take elements from these people is because 1. I just think they’re neat. And 2. The word “pict” is said to come from the Latin word for “painted” (encyclopedia brittanica). This means that they adorned themselves with colorful designs most likely with either paints or tattoos. This can be seen in this photo:
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(I’m doing this all on mobile don’t bully me). As for the oc, I’d like to have her with more runic tattoos, bc of runestone ya know, and maybe have them a bit more sparse. The reason I bring up the picts is because they show an incredibly early example of European people painting/tattooing their body. I’d like to look towards the Inuit people for inspiration for anything on her face regarding the meaning of her tattoos. Like the lines near the eyes for sharper vision. Of course, I’m saying this as a white woman and I really don’t want to overstep so i want to make sure im respectful with my inspiration so I don’t seem like I’m cherry picking.
Anyways, I started off by talking about her name and I got a bit carried away (this is how I’m using my 4 years of college and the endless dissertations). Personally, I’m leaning towards a few names:
1. Bride- pronounced “Bree-ja” meaning “exalted one.”
2. Fallon- meaning leader.
3. Rionna- “queen like”
If you or anyone have any more ideas pls let me know!!!
1: thank you for the praise for the idea! It’s literally been in my mind since season one and I’ve had time to think it through. But I also can’t take credit for it completely- it’s a culmination of all the fics that I’ve read. Namely “I’ve dug two graves for us my dear” (Aemond/Royce oc) and “Wolves amongst dragons (Aemond/Sansa Stark time travel). I highly recommend both and they can be found on AO3.
From the former I took the idea of a capable oc, one that cares for her people and has done the work to build bonds. From the latter I took the idea of Jacaerys squiring. Now, you might be asking, how does that fit in with everything? Well in the fic, Jace is sent to squire for cregan after showing that he cares more for petty arguments than unity. He hasn’t started growing up.
What if the dance, for whatever reason, is put off for a few years? What if Rhaenyra sends her son to observe his estranged cousin under the guise of something like a wardship? This can all be adapted to fit any love interests, but Jace is young and he’s the one who’s got the most to learn about responsibility. Even Aegon understands what it means to rule and he doesn’t want it. He knows that it’s a big thing and he knows he’s not up to scratch- at least not the way he is now. This idea not only gives Rhaenyra back some of her plotting and scheming that’s lost in the show, but also allows for growth of the younger generation. Through the oc he’d learn responsibility- I feel like she’d start by having him muck out the stables, if you want to learn your people you gotta start from the bottom and work your way up. It would teach him humility but it would force him to make bonds with creatures and people other than the dragons.
At the end of every day, she’d ask him one question: what is the value of a Prince up against the value of a stable boy? And he’d fuck up the answer every time until he sees how she interacts with the other stable keepers. When he answers correctly, he gets moved up to blacksmith apprentice or buss boy in the kitchens. This idea allows for upward mobility. (As well as sweaty shirtless Jace who’s getting stronger (no pun intended) and more hard working)
Listen if I had half a brain for dialogue this fic would be written but I don’t so I need some help in that regard.
oh you definitely have a strong plot built already! it’s amazing? it’s unique and different! there could be many other fics with similar takes but yours is very fresh? jace being a squire is cool???
it allows him to grow, to build a stronger character to be a prince of honor not just for himself but for his people, it’ll allow him to be a much stronger person! the idea of oc kinda guiding jace to see beyond and into his people is so nice? jace in general is soft, and very passionate to learn so i know this he can take it into a challenge until he dominates it.. oh you definitely have such a good plot, there’s a lot of dialogue that could be incorporated, oc from what im seeing a brave, strong headed person so her way of speaking is very.. how can i say.. professional? empathetic? compared to jace who is just learning these things & hasn’t seen the things oc has seen so a lot of things can be added.. i would love to see more! but if you’d like help to build dialogue pls do let me know!
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transmutationisms · 2 years ago
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pls share abt pugh and pew...
okay this is so fucking half-baked but like.... ewan we presume is a lapsed catholic like logan. but logan talks about morality as something he experienced as a younger man (couldn't even take his shirt off) or as something for other people to worry about (life's not knights on horseback). whereas for ewan, he's obviously morally bankrupt and hypocritical, and he lives off logan's money, but he's also invested in the idea of himself as Righteous in a way logan isn't. which makes me think 1) the catholic guilt got ewan better than it got logan and/or 2) ewan has catholic brainpoisoning and can't express his anger at his brother thru any language besides church-style morality talk.
so like. his lawyer-slash-friend's name is roger pugh. which is pronounced like pew. like a church pew. and this is the guy ewan wants to produce some kind of damning legal exposé about capitalism. and also the guy that ewan angrily defends after greg abandons him and goes with waystar's legal counsel. so like. this is a stretch but...... ewan and logan both lack a real moral centre, having left the church. logan makes up for it by just declaring that morality doesn't matter, money is the Only Thing, and might is right. ewan otoh is more disturbed by his inability to perceive himself as righteous, and this is partly why he goes after logan's ethical failings so often. so if we accept that roger pugh = roger pew, it's like ewan's trying to elevate his blood feud and vague anti-capitalist ideology into a replacement for the church teachings he no longer feels connected to. like this crusade against logan and waystar is functioning as a religious crusade; whereas the roy sibs deify logan, ewan sees his brother as a false idol and worships his own god. in his mind, waystar needs to be saved or destroyed, and spiritual purification comes about thru anti-capitalism.
you made a neat post once about roman as the passive sufferer who seeks absolution, versus kendall as the martyr who seeks self-destruction: two different ways to be people who were Raised Under The Auspices Of The Catholic Church. i kind of think logan and ewan are two more flavours of this: logan presenting himself as the nihilist, whose rabid accumulation of capital defies and deconstucts the old church teachings, versus ewan, who sees himself as a crusader bringing righteousness to his wicked and spiritually unmoored family. ofc logan and ewan both consider themselves to be morally justified (or at least Excused), which makes them different from kendall and roman, who are both constantly seeking suffering.
but yeah the way this show is about pissing and shitting and generational trauma, but also it's about the way catholicism lives in your head rent-free forever and becomes the only way you can express any conflict with yourself or your loved ones. and greg not getting that, and roger pugh as a key piece of ewan's latest moral crusade. and the way ewan truly does see himself as being more moral than his family, even as he's living off logan's money and using greg's inheritance to try to control him. because as long as ewan can assimilate those actions into his overall quest to reform his family, no coercion or anger is disproportionate. he's doing the right thing, he's bringing god's word down the mountain (or like.... from canada down to his americanised brother, which..... is funny as a missionary thing) and so when greg leaves pugh, in ewan's mind it's literally profanation. "you don't take him for a fucking ride anywhere" lmao
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cvastals · 4 years ago
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look i kno i said i wasnt gna bring a 6th until i was caught up w replies bt i kno gunner well n therefore felt like he deserved his time to shine in the rp so i beg of u pls plot w him looks at u all like :B
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* axel auriant, cis man + he/him | you know gunner paxton, right? they’re twenty-two, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, four years? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to bizarre love triangle by new order like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole curling up for days in bed wearing a hello kitty comfort shirt, stuttering in the face of affection, and hand me downs two sizes too big thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is july 31st, so they’re a leo, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( bri, 23, est, they/them )
background.
middle child of the paxton family, cliff being the eldest and wyatt being the youngest :D
they lived at the top of a hill in a trailer in a trailer park neighbourhood in laramie, wyoming so to say the least that fucking sucked for everyone involved
the trailer was so small that all 3 boys ended up sharing a room, gunner and wyatt sharing a bunk bed bc they cldnt fit 3 beds into one room it really was every childs nightmare bt they quickly grew used to it tbh
gunner was always more of an artsy child than invested in sports - though he does enjoy baseball and continued even to this day after their dad made him join SOMETHING in middle school - so he never rly earned their father’s respect, but he was always close with his mom since they had the same calm temperament
(depression/anxiety tw) he also gained a list of mental health issues that their mom had as well, including social anxiety and major depressive disorder
(violence/abuse tw) their father always encouraged pretty volatile behaviour and it caused a lot of physical fights and arguments between the brothers when their dad told them the best way to get over it was to start hurting until someone tapped out, it was just a chaotic and pretty abusive household but no one knew and their mom definitely wasn’t going to say anything about it to their dad
(missing child/kidnapping/anxiety/depression tw)  wyatt went missing on a weekend that their parents were gone because of a trip they won, and things just got worse from there, high school was really rough for gunner, his anxiety grew worse as time went on that no one found wyatt, their dad grew more hostile towards them, cliff left home in the middle of the night never to be seen again (merely leaving a note so that the family didn’t think they had a case of two kidnapped children), and their mom just grew sicker, it was rare that she would ever leave her room and if she did it was in fits of random energy where she would do something spontaneous and completely unnecessary to their house as a way of coping
the two years that gunner was at home after cliff left were pretty brutal and as soon as he could, he was fleeing wyoming and going to school in irving
(internalized homophobia tw)  things are far better now that he’s out of his home situation, but ofc he still has a few personal things he’s working thru; the paxton’s were raised in an incredibly religious household, and he’s got some classic Catholic Guilt going on upon realizing that he’s not jst attracted to women n he avoided talking abt it forever/stayed in the closet fr far too long bt he’s sort of come out now in his own way even tho he does still get a bit nervous talking abt it rly
he’s also ‘dealing’ rn (just pharmaceuticals) which is frankly funny to think abt bc this man is abt as threatening as a care bear bt money is tight all things considering and a librarian job doesn’t rly cover it, and with the amount of meds he’s on, plus incredibly frequent doctor’s visits, needing to pay for extra epi-pens, inhalers, etcs. bills add up so he’s cutting back his meds n selling wht he can spare which is . so unhealthy bt thts life in corporate america baybee!
details.
is literally allergic to everything. grass, cats, most fruits, milk, most nuts, bees, latex, probably more i cnt even keep up w them its pathetic
u can catch him strutting around town w his blinged out epipen holder (aka blinged out w pins of his fav horrors movies) LKSHDGKLHSKLDG
if things cldnt get worse he also has quite intense asthma so he carries an inhaler with him at all times
n to make matters even WORSE he frequently has dizzy spells n bad memory problems bc of all the concussions he’s suffered from (about 8-9 at this point) as well as consistent migraines that can b literally debilitating sometimes
awkward n jst a bit of a Weirdo to b frank like he barely knows how to converse with ppl
didnt have any friends in high school so took the time to teach himself rly weird things, knows a fuck ton of magic tricks, can yodel, juggle, solve a rubix cube with his eyes closed in under 30 seconds, just extremely weird and specific things
can honestly b a bit mean/barbaric to ppl he’s not close w/doesn’t kno - has told ppl to their face before he doesn’t enjoy talking to them bc he has no concept of social constructs/norms
loves 2 film random things at parties, makes him feel more comfortable at them n he makes short films of them all after
going off that fact he did a film internship in nyc during the summer and is trying to find a job in that field
doesn’t realize demisexuality is a thing so he’s never been that fond of sex but has this stigma in his mind that that makes him Broken so he still Tries n it jst doesnt go well tugs my shirt collar
connections.
ppl who r more into under the counter meds than Hard Drugs n buy off him?? probs wld have to kno him some way hes too scared to sell to Random randoms
ppl he went to school w? :D
some friends………. hes awkward bt he means well…………
ppl he has a crush on/unrequited crushes either way wtvr floats ur boat he crushes quite easily but never does anything abt it fr the most part
a mans he wld Risk It All fr (aka a guy tht he actually has a crush on n is Extra Awkward probs a lil mean to bc hes still New to That)
some enemies tbh, he has a temper n he tends to blow up rarely bt it happens n when it does it actually can b quite scary JKSHDGLHSDG
a muse….. mayhaps?? someone he always wants in his film projects
awkward past hook ups/one night stands where one of them cut ties off cuz every time they got together gunner acted like he was embalming a body for a funeral
current hook ups/fwb’s w ppl he’s actually close w/is comfortable w so its nowhere near as bad SDKHSLDGHKLSDGH
Anything u Desire
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coldasyou · 6 years ago
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Hello and welcome to my thoughts ™ on the new episode of the good doctor! I know you are all DYING to hear them so let’s go.
We love an opening that references season 1 episodes! (Added to my gif list)
Is lea implying her family was poor ugh icon
Poor Shaun he deserves better
Claire and Shaun aren’t together I really can never win
I’m screaming grey’s anatomy really took all the good paitent storylines rip
MORGAN NO ASKING QUESTIONS TO THE PAITENTS SHAUN GOT TRANSFERED FOR THAT SHIT!
Killed someone this show has lost it
Ugh skip
They’re really just throwing out brain scans as if those doesn’t cost thousands of dollars paitents can’t afford that
The scalpel is back THE LEVELS the show said if we’re going back to season 1 storylines we’re doing it all…does this mean Shaun and Claire can act like they did in season 1 and actually talk?
CARLYYYYYYY fucking finally this really is a season one throwback and we get a last name
She is so sweet
And she is talking to Shaun can Claire come hang out too
Me too Shaun me too
Ugh this is why I’m a humanities person
IM SCREAMING leave Claire the fuck alone
Morgan was so quick to be like “SO YOU HATE EVERYONE WHO BELIEVES IN GOD HMMM” breznik feelings canceled until they have a cute glance again
I’m already annoyed with this plotline
Claire is talking to ******** more than she talked to Shaun last episode shaire stans remain the MOST oppressed
WHY DOES EVERYONE ON THIS SHOW HAVE CANCER???
Can I call Claire an atheist icon now? If they make her change her beliefs I’m gonna be annoyed lmao. I think there can be some middle ground here y’all
I relate to all this Catholic Guilt ™ tho
Park needs to stop acting like he gives a shit lmao
Park stop fucking stirring the pot since when did YOU care
Ugh it’s hard only stanning four ppl on this show
Can someone PLS just threaten to sue Han or leak this to the press lmao problem solved you’re welcome
How iconic would it be if lim was just like “I’m autistic. Are you going to transfer me too?”…LISTEN SHE IS AUTISTIC
I was right Claire looks beautiful
How can you afford all these surgeries I’m yelling
Who is being poisoned with cyanide I’m screaming can we pls have a show abt pathology and Carly and not these boring ass plots we’ve been getting
NEXT TIME I love one (1) man
CLAIRE YESSS FIGHT FOR YOUR HUSBAND
She deserves better I’m tired of everyone talking down to her
SHE IS A LOYAL FRIEND AND ALSO GIRLFRIEND AND ALSO WIFE
I’m screaming can we pls have her go talk to Shaun abt all this and promise she’ll fight for him or is that to much to ask
The ableism is jumping out
IM SCREAMING DID YALL JUST COMPARE AUTISM TO THE FLU???
Han is why men don’t have rights
Claire is the queen of being right while everyone else is dumb af
Oh this lady damn everyone is coming back this episode!
Glassman she’s dating someone why are you so Dense
Is this gonna be like a Brennan from bones situation where everyone keeps pushing religion on Claire when she doesn’t want it I’m already tired
And another thing she just thinks he shouldn’t suffer for god she never said she didn’t think he should believe
But enjoy projecting your shit on her Morgan!
Lim is the only bitch in this house I respect
Honestly probably not bc Claire isn’t allowed to have anything either!
So we got Shaun talking abt Claire but in this way WHYYYYY
just let them be happy together I hate this
Clarie’s hair looks amazing
Claire is a hockey fan…the gay jumped out
What is Shaun doing I stan it tho
Oh NOW glassman will talk to him
Well I mean Shaun has been right abt like 90 other cases
Glassy you’re so fucking annoying remember when you were all abt helping Shaun lmao
HE HAS STOOD UP FOR HIMSELF AND THEN HE GETS IN TROUBLE YALL ARE TESTING ME
Shaun is so honest ixhxjsuswhhaa
Oh the loophole Jessica taught him well
Shaun that’s like…probably illegal but that’s okay
I wonder when the whole quarantine issue is gonna go down
Shaun yess now bring out those illustrations
Han is just gonna steal his idea pretends to be shocked
God these episodes kinda drag when you aren’t live-blogging and reading jokes
I know they’re married irl but she looks so young compared to him
Yeah lady he always pushes ppl away get used to it
Anyone else feel glassman has become intolerable this season?
Claire is so smart queen of religious studies
Okay this show isn’t going the route of Claire being converted or singled out as a bitch or bitter…we will proceed cautiously
Morgan is so fucking nosey you are loosing all the goodwill I gave you
Also just say atheist I’m screaming???
Ofc bc everyone who doesn’t believe in god is broken and empty and secretly hates themselves LOVE that for me!
I’m screaming the girl is like Oh Worm
Han is so annoying get a JOB
King of boundaries!
Are y’all gonna start shipping lim and Shaun now bc I’m not ready
Good work I’m still not gonna put u back in surgery tho
He’s so close to crying I’m abt to mcfucking loose it
Freddie is coming for the Emmy
Kinda wanna d*e
HAN JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP IM BEGGING!
Allistics have lost their rights
Wow it’s almost like everyone has weaknesses including you doctor Han and yet you’re still here
Can a show just have a charecter that’s not religious it doesn’t have to be like a THING I’m tired
Oof the cinnamon tography
SCALPEL I’m gonna cry can we get a flashback now?
Steve didn’t die for this
overall Thots: han can choke, needs more shaire, when will lea be allowed to talk to someone who isn’t shaun or glassy, claire deserves better, carly should have her own show, morgan is on the shit list again, park is still irrelevant…6/10 
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hopemikaelsvns-moved · 6 years ago
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Fdtd is one of the best series I've ever watched (thank you again for the recommendation) so I must know more about Gabbie Fuller. What al can you share? What's her personality like? Her relationships with her family (esp Kate, my angel) and the Gecko brothers?
I LITERALLY STOPPED WRITING CAUSE I LOVE THIS ASK SO SO MUCH. Like, Gabrielle Eva Fuller is my little babe who doesn’t deserve ANYTHING I planned for her. Again, you’re welcome, this serie is pure gold and I know that you have good taste, love.
Gabbie Fuller is the oldest child of the Fuller, and is nineteen at the start of the serie. She’s an uni student in language I think cause she always been curious about cultures and mostly travelling. Gabbie is someone very dynamic, always on the move and curious, she always been the kind of girl who make research for EVERYTHING, a little bit nerdy. But she’s always been the cool kid, with very social, very sarcastic and sassy and mostly, who loves to party a little bit. Unlike her siblings, she never truly believed in God cause religions always been the unknow, non proven, and Gabbie is the kind of girl who need to see things to believe it. And with her free spirit, she couldn’t just accept to live by the rules of someone who doesn’t exist. She’s very conflicted about cause her family believes in religion so much so she tries to hide it/not talking about it cause she’s kind of afraid of her family relationship. So when she does some non-catholic things, she made sure that no one knows/tells. Other than that, Gabbie is a little arrogant but still generous and kind. Her mom’s death made her very cold, detached almost numb for so many reasons and it mostly out of guilt. So I think that she’ll kinda try to get more into religions to feel closer to her mom, and mostly cause she wants to believe that it happened for a reason and make her mom’s death “usefull”.
As for her relationship, she always had a peculiar relationships with her parents mostly cause she hidden a part of herself. Gabbie loved her parents dearly but felt they couldn’t truly get her and it frustated her a lot but she always acted otherwise. So she was good with her parents but they weren’t close. A little before her mother’s death, they went into a fight cause Gabbie’s mom learn by accident everything that Gabbie done and she wasn’t quite happy by her actions. And Gabbie might learn about her mother’s illness, idk yet but her last words were basically hateful words so Gabbie’s very shaken and guilty about how things ended. Jacob and Gabbie are definitely in a Cold War as the fiction starts cause Gabbie is mad at her dad for never talk about their mom, caring about their mourns and the way he behave but it’s more like snarky comments and death glares while the other siblings are like “what do we do?”. Gabbie adores her siblings, like for real. She loves Kate and Scott more than her own life althought she’s a little bit jealous about perfect Kate but not too jealous. Kate knows that Gabbie will always be there for her and that she tries to be strong for their family. (like in the serie, Kate acts like an adult but if I ever write it, Gabbie will take upon that role). Gabbie kinda tease her about church boy time to time. Gabbie is basically a Scott stan cause no matter what, she’s always heart-eyes (in a sisterly way) at Scott (until he became a Culebra tbh)  and is SO protective with him, especially since she knows he was bullied.
The Gecko Brother or complication at their finnest. Gabbie and Richie are attracted to each other in some way. Richard and Gabbie knows how it feels to left out, cause during a long time Gabbie felt that way with her parents. Like, Gabbie, despite not talking about her lack of belief in religion, the way she behaves showed a little bit about how she felt about it. And Blethel was mostly catholic so ppl gave her looks cause she showed, despite herself, her lack of interest in religion (during mess or that kind of thing). Or how much she was vocal about sensible subject for the Catholic Church (like, the girl lived in Texas and from what I heard it’s not great to live in). Plus, both Richie and Gabbie are the learner kind. So it’s weird cause she finds herself drawn to him, fiding some similarities but at the same time, she’s mad as hell cause he’s kind of creepy and kidnapping her and her family. They get close during the trip but the end of season one left them very very angsty af. Especially since Gabbie blames Richie for everything bc if it weren’t for him and his brother, she wouldn’t lost everything. Seth is a pain in the ass for her, and at first she loathes him even if he’s stopping Richie from killing them lmaoo. They’re very much alike, both sarcastic, both done with everything and both not happy with culebras. They’re like oil and water, they do not get along at first but Gabbie and Seth ends up to likes each other. They ends up considering each other as friends, even family. Seth is highkey protective of Gabbie, even thought she doesn’t need it, (a little bit like Kate) and trusts her a lot.
Now, under the cut, there is spoiler cause I’m not capable of holding my tongue. But it’s short for the spoiler btw.
By the end of season one, Gabbie ends up leaving the Twitty Tister alone. She’s kinda mad at Kate for leaving with Seth. Hates Seth and Richie, but also herself cause she felt something for him. Also, she’s mad at Scott and basically losts her shit. She’s very driven by the desire to revenge, mostly to avoid her feelings and dealt with it and after a month of research, she actually find hunters of Culebra. Pretty much the same warrior as Freddie, so she goes like “I survived Santanico and that’s shit, I want to kill some snakes so pls take me” and end up being training by them. At the start of season two, she’s a bounty hunter cause killing Culebra doesn’t pay the rent. Gabbie is honestly a mess who kills for no dealing with an hunter talents so she’s very lethal. Despite her bitterness toward Kate for staying with Seth, she decides to help her when she needs her but is really bitter about it, and makes comments every seconds. But she holds on to Kate cause she’s all she got left. Gabbie does not believes in Scott and basically wants to kill him which creates a lot of conflicts. Gabbie, in the second season, mostly follows Kate while trying to deal with her parents death, all the ptsd and accepting her brother.
Kate’s death at the end of the second seasons crushes her but she dealth with it better than the last time. At least, she didn’t turn into the heartless killer and stay with the Geckos who becames her family basically, even more after Scott’s left her. (which hurt Gabbie but they worked things out when Amaru tried to go after Scott). Richie and Gabbie are in relationship, and a healthy one where they trust each other, there is no jealousy (not even when Kisa comes) and when they decided that they’ll stay together no matter what. At this point, they just accepted that they were attracked/connected/loved each other and that after everything they went throught, Gabbie and Richie had the right to have something good in their life even if it’s not easy cause Gabbie has a lot of guilt. Seth and Gabbie accepted that they were family, that they had each other no matter what and no matter how much she wanted to strangle him. But Amaru messed her up cause it brings back all of her guilt to the point where she doesn’t care about her life anymore and just want to save Kate/getting ride of Amaru and ending in hell (she pretty much accepted that she did a lot of bad things and is ready to pay for it). Gabbie is mostly torn between trying to get her sister back alive or killing her to make sure Amaru is gone but in both way, Gabbie is like “I don’t want my sister to live with guilt, I don’t want her to think herself as a monster so if the only way is to kill Kate, I’ll do it” cause she knows her sister and what she would want. 
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Here’s All the Best Stuff to Do in Mykonos and Santorini
Very lame, but I’ve always been kinda afraid of traveling. It’s not a fear of flying, but more that I was born in another country and, as such, overseas travel means a dramatic family visit weighed down with stress, guilt, and 20+ hours on a plane to Asia (where even as a 9-year-old, I was already on some shit about compression socks).
All this to say I don’t feel anything when people quit their jobs to travel the world, and follow zero travel Instagrammers. I’ve gone my entire life without ~seeing the world~ (couldn’t afford to study abroad so my personality doesn’t hinge on four months I spent in Paris, sorry!) and honestly, I would’ve been fine with that forever.
But when I got an invite to tour Mykonos and Santorini on a hotel-hopping trip with Katikies Resorts and Clubs, even *I* was like, HOLYSHITYES. After all, Santorini has been called the “Instagram Island” and when one of the top ten most Instagrammable hotels in Greece (where even Justin Bieber has stayed) invites you on a dream summer vacay, you don’t ask how they got your e-mail—you just GO before they change their minds. Anyway, here are all the fun things that impressed me the most.
First up, don’t even think about leaving without the following:
Butterfly Dress
Reformation thereformation.com
$278.00
Wide Brim Straw Hat
Sensi Studio modaoperandi.com
$295.00
Ultra Jungle Cat-Eye Sunglasses
Crap Eyewear crapeyewear.com
$79.00
Face Crème Night Time/Anytime
Cece Top
Sommer Swim sommerswim.com
$69.00
Jane Bottom
Sommer Swim sommerswim.com
$69.00
Rosemead Dress
Reformation thereformation.com
$198.00
The Bigger Carry-On
Away awaytravel.com
$245.00
Alegra Slip
Sommer Swim sommerswim.com
$219.00
Biore UV Aqua Rich Sunscreen SPF 50+
Mavic 2 Pro
DJI Mavic 2 dji.com
$1,499.00
1. Party it up at all the Mykonos clubs before going to Santorini.
If you are like me two weeks ago and have no idea how to distinguish between different Greek islands, trust when I say you’re gonna wanna do Mykonos first and then Santorini. Why? Totally different vibes. Mykonos is club central—the energy there is extremely horny, and you’ll want to get hedonistic and loose there first before calming down and sightseeing in Santorini, where everyone is coupled up. Everyone is also super hot (still thinking about you, hot passport control guy, imy), friendly, and funny.
Book Now Katikies Mykonos
In the wedding party of my dreams, we rent a bunch of private villas in Mykonos, go to Elia beach, and lounge around our private pool (IDK what’s up with the pool industry in Greece, but it seems like even two-bedroom vacay villas have ones the size of McMansions) before hitting up the two main hot spots: Scorpios and Nammos. If you’re a night owl, you will THRIVE in Mykonos: Parties usually don’t “start” until 2 a.m., and they easily last until 6. Lindsay Lohan may or may not be there.
2. Go shopping in Mykonos town.
The long, winding streets of Mykonos town are filled with little shops and scenic nooks and crannies perfect for ’gramming. Take a day to explore by foot, and add in time for a leisurely lunch and dinner.
During lunch at Kazarma, our waiter mentioned that the historic building used to be owned by Mantos Mavrogenous, a bad bitch who kept a cache of weapons and cash in the building during the Greek War of Independence. Yes, she wound up dying alone, broke from spending all her money on the war effort (for which she was never repaid), and yes, we stan.
3. Take the ferry and bop over to Santorini.
The ferry takes around four hours (compared to the one-hour flight) but offers a much more scenic route. They usually stop to pick up passengers in Naxos, Paros, and Ios, and you can go on the deck to scope out the different cities. Didn’t have time to see any ruins on your trip? The Portara is easily visible from the ferry deck and dates back to 530 BC.
When it’s time to dock in Santorini, you’ll go down into the bowels of the ferry to collect your luggage before disembarking. It’s very much like you’re in Star Wars shipping off in the belly of a giant spacecraft before the gates open and SUN! SANTORINI! JK, you can’t see anything yet because you gotta go up the cliff and settle into a hotel for that Insta-famous Santorini view.
4. Stay in a traditional cave house and appreciate the architecture.
Fun fact: All those cave-like homes you see on Insta (hyposkapha, if you want to be legit about it) are because the islanders kept getting their shit rocked by pirates in the 16th century. As a result, they had to build upward on the most precipitous cliffs they could find.
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Carina Hsieh
Book Now Kirini Santorini
This is why Santorini looks and feels so different from other warm would-be-beach towns. There’s no way of just walking from your hotel to the shore—all the resorts are on top of literal cliffs. I stayed in the Kirini Santorini (Carina at Kirini! LOL invite me back pls) and it was *chef’s kiss* in terms of views.
This drone video I bribed Konstantinos Sigalas, Katikies’ social media executive, to take will help you see what I mean.
5. Go on a caldera cruise.
I’m sorry to report that my stupid ass saw a bunch of photos of the ocean in Santorini and was like, “Oh, it’s definitely like a beach town.” Folks, it ain’t!
Few beaches are accessible by foot in Santorini, so the best way to take advantage of that crystal blue Aegean is by boat. We chartered a Riva yacht (v bougie) to take us around the island and stopped where the water looked the dreamiest to pop in for a swim.
On the boat, Sigalas shared this hot blogger tip for getting the best Insta eye-candy shot: Shoot video on your phone, scroll through the video to find the perfect still, and use a screenshot of THAT to get the perfect photo. Very important: you’ll need to go into “Settings —> Camera —>” and adjust “Record Video” to “4K at 60 FPS” for the most high-res stills.
Book Now Caldera Cruise, starting at $1,600/for two passengers
6. Go swimming in the hot springs.
During your caldera cruise you should also ask the captain to make a detour to the hot springs. You’ll know you’re there because the water goes from deep blue to turquoisey-green with orange sulfur on the rocks of the inlet.
Do: Bring a pool noodle. Sorry to everyone who got tired swimming into the inlet, but our captain immediately sized up our wine-drunk asses and was like, “You probs want these.” And we did!Don’t: Wear white in the hot springs. The sulfur will fuck this up. Don’t: Wear any jewelry in the hot springs. Again, sulfur.
A fact I tried very hard to contain during my trip is that I’m the world’s pickiest eater. My definition of seafood means fish sticks from those microwave meals with the penguin, and avoiding vegetables is a firm 1/16th of my personality. But Greece, where the produce and fish are so fresh, suddenly made me the biggest tomato stan on earth, and I would step into the ring for second helpings of whatever sea creature is placed in front of me.
It also helps when everything is deliciously cooked. The restaurants are so exclusive that you usually have to be a member of the Katikies Club to dine there—although this year they opened Mikrasia (with locations in Santorini and Mykonos) and DePaul Restaurant to the public. Santorini Mikrasia has only six tables and it’s generally recommended you book a spot a few weeks in advance. The Mykonos version has more tables but is also v fancy — resident chef Angelos Bakopoulos was on Greek Master Chef. Both restos also won the FNL awards in 2018 (the Greek equivalent to the Michelin Guide).
While a lot of Santorini is Greek Orthodox, Fira town (the capital) has a Catholic church and a monastery where the Vatican would store Greek wines to be shipped to the Pope. Recently, the monastery was bought and turned into Katikies Garden. It’s the most family-friendly of the Katikies clique because there aren’t as many steep stairs. (Seriously! That’s why Santorini doesn’t have a ton of kids running around! What if they fall!)
While everything else in Santorini feels exactly like you’d picture it from postcards and Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants (sun-drenched, everything bright white), the streets of Fira have a Venetian feel. Even the building’s colors reflect this: There’s a lot of beige and pink as well as rounded archways and courtyards that feel hella Italianate.
It’s all very subtle, but the best way I can describe it is like you suddenly look up and gaslight yourself into wondering if you’re still in Greece. You are!
I’m a pretty tough spa critic (I like my massages how I like my breakups: rough, hard, and with me begging for five more minutes). Yet no treatment has ever compared to the one I got from Nicole at A.Spa. No joke, I physically felt her clear my sinuses through my back at one point. Magic.
Stop by Venetsanos Winery for a tour of the first industrial winery on Santorini. If you’re the opposite of claustrophobic, you can squeeze your bod through one of the old underground wine storage tanks and finish off your day with a breathtaking view of the caldera as you sample a bunch of delicious wines.
Contemplate the meaning of life as you stare off into the Aegean and wonder when your husband will return from Greco-Persian war.
Then, consider taking a second mortgage on the house you do not own in order to stay in Greece forever. Or at least come back next year.
If you can’t make it to Greece just yet, here’s what to buy instead:
Three Cents Pink Grapefruit Soda
Three Cents thewhiskyexchange.com
£1.25
This is the status soda of Greece. Every bar/restaurant worth visiting is stocked up on this pink stuff, and it’s in all the delicious cocktails. I may not know food, but I know my carbonated bevs, and this is GOOD. 
Oia in Santorini by Kadio Kolymva
Armos amazon.com
Super thin and stocked with tons of fascinating tidbits about Oia and Santorini. If you don’t wanna bug the hotel staff with hundreds of iterations of, “Wait, explain how they carved out all these rooms out of rock without power tools again?” like I did, this book will sate you in the best way. 
Donkey Milk Face Serum
Body Farm Greece hercules-shop.com
€32.00
Thank me later when Donkey Milk becomes a Thing in the U.S. One of the women I traveled with picked up this serum on a whim, and for the rest of the trip everyone was fascinated by how great it was. Also, Cleopatra is said to have bathed in donkey milk, so there you go. 
Korres Pure Greek Olive Body Set
You may have heard of Korres here, but I’ve got news for you. There are secret Greece-exclusive products that are WAY better. One of the women on our trip was on a mission to restock her daughter’s collection of the Olive body lotion she’d picked up the previous year, and after trying it, MAN DO I UNDERSTAND THE URGENCY. 
Carina Hsieh Sex & Relationships Editor Carina Hsieh lives in NYC with her French Bulldog Bao Bao — follow her on Instagram and Twitter • Candace Bushnell once called her the Samantha Jones of Tinder • She enjoys hanging out in the candle aisle of TJ Maxx and getting lost in Amazon spirals. 
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