#botanical ask meme

[crookedorel]

zinnia : how has the loss of fallen comrades and/or loved ones affected your muse ? has it taught them anything or given them any new perspectives ? >:)

Okay let's talk about loss, actually. Loss is such an important theme in Shadows of Valentia, and in the character arcs of its entire cast. If I were feeling ambitious I'd argue that loss and the way that it's handled is The Theme, which shaped the forming of the nations, to kicking off the plot, and the negative space of each of the cast's loss is so visible and apparent in every action they take, like an embrace of those they don't want to or can't forget. 

But that's an essay for another time. 

Berkut being one of the major antagonists, and foil to the two protagonists, his losses affect the plot just as heavily. There is of course the obvious, and we'll discuss those in a minute, but I actually want to discuss a loss that doesn't get brought up in-game but has such clear and disastrous ramifications for Valentia as a whole. 

Because you see, when Berkut was a boy, his father died. 

(Cut for length. You know how it goes. SOV spoilers as well)

Now, I know what you're thinking. "Oh, boo hoo, this is Dead Father the Series, and you don't see anyone else letting themselves get possessed by a war god and sacrificing their loved ones' souls for greater power." And you're right! But bear with me, because there's more to it than that. 

To start putting this into context, I'm going to pull from Valentia Accordion (the Berkut entry in which was translated by our very own Ree, here's your crown regent 👑). We learn from Berkut's section that before his father's passing, Berkut was a timid boy, to the point that even riding horseback made him cry - and after his father's passing, his mother raised him quite strictly, to harden him up so that none could tease him for growing up without a father. 

As with most things Valentia, this is such a dense sentence, so let's unpack it a bit.  

Obviously that's a fucked up thing to expect, that your child will be harassed for having lost a parent, but kids are cruel, and from this sentence we learn that Rigel values patrilineal lines, and to an extreme extent. Since they're the imperial family with very few heirs, it seems incredibly unlikely that Berkut's father married below his station (bordering on impossible – this is no Meghan Markle situation) - and since Berkut obviously ended up the crown prince, the heir to the empire barring any usurpers, his mother clearly retained influence within the imperial court during her time there, as noble and mother to the future Emperor. 

And yet, a single mother, even widowed, still casts a shameful shadow in Rigel. We do not learn how Berkut's father died, but I'm of the opinion it was illness, for a couple of reasons: first, we have historical precedent. Generally in monarchical families that have multiple sons, the first (the heir) learns military affairs and politics, the better to ascend the throne or position when the time comes – the second (the spare) would then learn ecclesiastical affairs and gain a position in the religious affairs of the state, the better to support his brother further down the line. 

Secondly, his death is implied to be something to be ashamed of, something that children would tease Berkut for. Though misogyny runs strong in many cultures, it doesn't seem enough that his mother would be concerned that his father dying on its own would be enough that Berkut would need to toughen up. Given that Rigel has such a strong martial culture, and the hard turn that Berkut's mother imposed upon him after her husband's death, it would follow that for men, there is one acceptable death: battle. 

As we know, I don't put a lot of stock into Heroes' characterization, but occasionally they give us nice little nuggets, such as this one, from A Splendid Soiree level 40: 

Unlike his older brother the emperor, my father was a kind, gentle man. He passed ere I was 10 years old. My mother smiled often when I was small.  

If nothing else, it seemed, Berkut's mother was determined to ensure that, for better or worse, Berkut did not end up like his father. 

And he didn't. Kind and gentle are not words that I would associate with Berkut, except specifically when he's interacting with Rinea – but even with that influence, we see that he is definitely a young man shaped by his upbringing, and by the culture around him. He's eager to fight, even to the point of what I would consider emotional immaturity – he's unable to see human lives for what they are, and when he first meets Alm he refers to the battle as practice, as sport, as exercise, like it's just a game that he's playing. 

I think it's this disconnect that he has, this inability or the inexperience to actively practice empathy (decidedly not a value in Rigel), that makes him so susceptible to outside influences: be that Rigelian people or culture as a whole, or Rudolf's or his mother's, Duma's or Nuibaba's, or even Fernand's. 

Yes, Fernand's. Despite the fact that Fernand is a political prisoner, it is undeniable that he has more worldly experience (in and out of wartime) than Berkut by the simple fact of his age. We don't have an official age for him, but we can get a good guestimate based on Clive and Mathilda's ages – 27 and 28, respectively. A full decade, at the very least, older than Berkut.  

Now, this is not to say, of course, that Fernand knowingly exerted any influence over Berkut, or manipulated him – but it is to say that teenagers of Berkut's general disposition are eager to show off, and will adjust the behaviors they display in order to impress the people around them, especially those who are older or more experienced. And with Fernand himself leaning so idealistic, wanting to see something specific, it seems clear to me that natural showman Berkut was eager to mold himself into that, and to show it off at any opportunity. 

Which, by the way, is something that Berkut is shown doing throughout the game, in each of his appearances – mirroring the expectations presented to him, molding himself to fit into whatever those opposite him have decided he should be, and being so proud that he gets a good grade in being manipulated. 

Now, I know it seems like we're getting off topic, and that I'm trying to avoid the elephant in the room, but I promise I'm not – this is all incredibly important context for what comes next, which of course that he, under the influence of Duma's possession, sacrifices Rinea. 

 By this point, he has lost to Alm multiple times – with an audience, no less – he has called upon the magic pushed on him by breaking the mirror Nuibaba gave him, and he has learned that this stranger who has been defeating him all over the country is actually the one who is supposed to be the emperor's heir. Not only has Alm beaten him in battle in front of someone Berkut wanted to impress, but he has, seemingly without any of the effort Berkut has been putting in over the last several years to gain Rudolf's favor, jumped the line of succession, and is coming to take not just Rigel, but Berkut's father figure. 

The second father he has lost. 

Watching the scene wherein Duma fully possesses Berkut, or even just reading the script, you can feel that the ground ready to open under his feet, and his grip over his own mental autonomy is tenuous at best. He is paranoid, he lashes out, and most importantly, he's confused. The scene begins by explicitly telling us that he does not know how he arrived at Duma Temple, and he is immediately beset by Duma's presence, the voice of a god offering the power that Berkut has felt slipping from his fingers. 

Whether he explicitly accepted Duma, or whether Duma forced his way in, we do not know. What we do know, however, is that the change in his personality is immediate and obvious. Both Rinea and Fernand clock that whoever is speaking, it isn't the Berkut they know – by this point, though, it's too late, and he attacks and heavily injures both of them, with Fernand making it far enough to warn Alm, and with Rinea being sacrificed to Duma. 

However much of Berkut remained during his battle of Alm, it's clear from his battle quote that all of these losses, one right after another, lined up in a perfect queue of dominoes, and gripped him until his death: 

You… You took…everything from me. You will SUFFER for what you’ve done! 

Then, after his defeat: 

Alm: Why, Berkut? To have finally found family after all this time… Why did it come to this?!  Berkut: Heh… I have no family…nor do I want for one. 

To put a bow on the series of tragedies that shaped Berkut into a man he didn't want to be, the family and companionship that he so desperately needed had arrived, had knocked the sense back into him just in time for him to die. 

But not before one final chastisement, from the one person who had never asked him to be anything except himself: 

Rinea: Dear, proud Berkut… Even without crown or throne or castle… You were ever my emperor. A just, right, and noble man…  Berkut: Rinea…  Rinea: You were born to lead… This just wasn’t your empire. So come with me now. Let us find our empire together. If you’ll still take me for your empress?  Berkut: You’re right… You were always right. The moment I turned to a power beyond myself, the man you loved was dead. Rinea, forgive me… If you’ll have me, I’d be honored to…set out with you… 

For better or worse, from his mother's influence, Berkut had not ended up like his father in his death – but, in the matter of the woman he loved, perhaps he wasn't so different. 

[desertslegacy]

lotus :   has your muse ever felt as though they’ve been reborn ?have they ever desired the feeling of a fresh start ,   or a better understanding of themself and/or the world around them ?

:)

Let's just dive right into it. CW death, child death under the cut

The largest part of Igrene's identity is that she's The Guardian - it's a title that's passed down in her family, and it holds a lot of weight in Nabata. Like her father Hawkeye, and presumably his parents and theirs before him, it's her destined duty to protect those who live in Arcadia, and to drive out anyone who enters the Nabata desert.

And she lived within that identity - and only that identity - for most of her life. We don't know the amount of time in between Hawkeye's death and the start of Binding, but we can infer from her support conversations with Astolfo that she'd been doing this job for quite a while.

And then she met Astolfo. Or rather, Gorlois. A man who got lost in the desert, direly wounded and without his memories, Igrene takes him back to Arcadia and tends to him, nursing him back to health, until eventually the two fall in love, marry, and begin a family.

And we learn that it is during this period that Igrene describes herself as being happy - and she implies that it is the only time she might have been happy:

Astolfo: ...I'm sorry to say this to you, but... That guy is dead. He was devoured by the quicksand of Nabata. All this stuff about spies and whatnot... It's just your imagination. Or perhaps you saw an illusion in the desert heat. Igrene: ...... I...see... Then... I must have been dreaming... I must have had a dream of a short period of happiness... (Astolfo A)

That happiness is short lived, as we learn, when invaders come into the desert, and it is Gorlois who goes out to meet them, not The Guardian. There are a few possibilities for the reason for this, first and foremost that Gorlois, who presumably remembered by this point that he is actually Ostian spy Astolfo, needed to get the fuck out of dodge to get back to work, but also to protect Igrene, as I suspect that he suspected those invaders were truly after him.

Another possibility for Igrene not arguing harder that she should be the one to do her duty, or at the very least join him, is that she was pregnant at the time, and it is possible that in her bliss she trusted Gorlois to take care of it for her and return to her. It is a notable trait among couples that pronoun usage shifts from 'I' and 'you' to 'we', and the sharing of daily life becomes inextricable - so it is a signal of ultimate trust on Igrene's part that events were allowed to transpire in that way at all, regardless of what the discussion must have been like.

It is telling, however, that their child never comes up during their support conversations - only the fact that he left. This leads me to believe that Igrene was pregnant at the time of his leaving, but that he didn't know yet.

So the timeline of events that we have is this: Igrene finds Gorlois and nurses him back to health, they become lovers and eventually marry, Igrene becomes pregnant, Gorlois "dies", and Igrene delivers their daughter on her own.

Well, not entirely on her own. She is The Guardian, after all, and it is said it takes a village to raise a child. We learn from the Fae A support that Igrene does not miscarry and her daughter is not stillborn - indeed, she lives to be old enough to walk, and talk and play with Fae and Sophia, and to understand abstract concepts - such as that Arcadia is a secluded place and that there exists such thing as an "outside", which she has presumably seen, and that her mother is The Guardian.

But she, like Gorlois, eventually dies as well.

Where I think that Igrene harbors some guilt, and always will, about the fate of her husband - she is the Guardian, and it should have been her job to drive off the invaders that night, not him - I think the loss of her child changed her entirely.

I used to believe in God as well. Although it is a different God from yours, I think I was fairly serious about it. (...) Several years ago...I stopped praying. It was after I lost a loved one in battle. (...) Those who pray to God expect something in return. But they will never receive anything, and that causes them to hate God. I think that it would be a lot less trouble to think that no such being exists in the first place. (Saul B)

This conversation with Saul is a familiar one for many people who have harbored religious beliefs through a time of grief, and it is a series of lines that is drenched in bitterness. It is implied that she stopped praying, stopped asking for help after Gorlois died, and she continues to imply that this silence from a higher power caused her to hate that higher power.

I think it is at this point that Igrene threw herself back into her duty wholly - no longer wife, no longer mother, perhaps even for a while no longer Igrene, daughter of Hawkeye, merely The Guardian, a stolid and unchanging force of nature, there to protect.

Astolfo: ...Igrene. ...No... Sorry, forget it. (...) Just...forget it all. ...Please. (Astolfo A)

This line is the last line in her conversations with Astolfo, who she has confronted with proof that she understands exactly what happens, and why. From her side of the conversation, we can start to see that she has perhaps begun to process and heal from the grief of losing her husband and daughter - and I think that this line from Astolfo, this acknowledgement, the barest inch that he gave her, destroyed some of that progress.

Why do I think that?

Not only does she have no paired endings - not with Fae nor Sophia, nor with her husband wherein they reconcile - but her ending has her promising to return to Nabata, but instead wandering the continent alone, without making any clear impressions on anyone.

"After saying that she would return to Nabata, Igrene disappeared. There are records of people seeing her in various places around the continent, but no one knows where or how she led the rest of her life."

I think that before and during the game, Igrene has a clear set of convictions, and holds a reliance on her duty that helped her get through a period of immeasurable grief, and we see that perfectly through the rest of her supports (her chain with Douglas has her following him around, demanding to know why he can't promise her an attempt at peace) - but I think she began to lose her faith again, little by little, until she spiraled once again in her depression, and began to wander in the hope of finding herself.

Not as the Guardian of the Desert, but as Igrene.

[bxldrsdraumar]

mint :   does your muse view themself as virtuous   &   moral ?what do these words mean to them ?

(@solmtinel who asked the same)

Sigurd is a bit of a funny guy in that he assumes that what he is doing is the right thing always without actually checking to make sure that this is the case. Critical thinking skills are not his forte - this man is all heart, and because he knows that his actions come from a place of love and righteousness (by which I mean, he never acts out of ill will), he thinks this means that by default these decisions are the correct ones.

Let's get a little Doylist with it and take the most egregious example: the entire castle seizing mechanic of the game. Sigurd is compelled by the virtue of the programming of the game to conquer not just castles in his own country, but those of neighboring countries as well. This is explained in-game as a bit of a game of dominoes - one act of aggression leads to a reaction leads to a reaction leads to Belhalla - but for every castle that Sigurd takes, someone pushes against him, and his response is generally uniform:

I did it because I had to, it was the right thing to do.

It is really only when Eldigan (and Lewyn) confronts him that he starts to feel remorse for his actions - Eldigan because this is a man he respects coming to defend his own country against Sigurd's invading force, just as Sigurd had done at Yngvi; and Lewyn who points out that for every action Sigurd takes, there is an equal consequence to the smallfolk, which he does not see because he has blinded himself in his single-mindedness.

To Sigurd, virtuousness and morality are the pinnacle of what a man should strive for, and so he does in his way - but he is so naive that he fails to take into account that he isn't actually the main character, and that just because he wants something a lot doesn't mean that it's actually Right.

[peerlessscowl]

hyacinth :   is your muse athletic ?does it come naturally to them ,   or have they had to work for their physique and/or skill ?

I think for Raven it's a combination of both. We are told explicitly that he is an incredibly gifted combatant - peerless, in his end card - and obviously his stats back that up, but based on conversations he's in it often appears to be effortless for him.

Raven: No...that’s not it—what are you doing dismantling your weapon here? Rebecca: Ah, um, it’s just—my bowstring was getting lax. I was trying to change it with another, you see... I’m just not very good at stringing... Raven: Hand me that. (Rebecca C)

Wil: But you’ve got this aura like you’ve seen it all… (Wil C)

Bartre: That gaze that misses nothing! That gait free of wasted effort! You are strong! And someday, we shall fight! (Bartre C)

For being as young as he is at only 19, he has talent over physical things, and he's skilled enough in them that he's even capable and confident with things that are not his forte (as seen with Rebecca's bowstring). I think this is a combination of hardwork and skill as a result of his upbringing, as noble boys were often rigorously trained in warfare, especially if their fathers were of higher status, as Marquess Cornwell appeared to be - and also of natural inherent talent. We do not ever hear that he struggles with these kinds of things, simply that he does them.

Raven: Then I’ll have to break down this door and go through you. You were using Lucius as a hostage, but now he’s here with me… (Whereabouts Unknown, Turn 3)

This line is interesting to me, because Raven is not a Big Talker. By which I don't mean he is often softspoken and quiet, although he is, but I mean that he doesn't shit talk, or talk himself up. If anything, during supports he's very humble, and demonstrates incredible self-awareness of his faults. Even though the line is a threat, and even though he is trying to ally himself with the soldier he's speaking to, it would be out of character for him to speak about himself in a way that is larger-than-life - which tells me that he wouldn't consider it as a threat, but a warning. Just a simple statement of fact.

That said, I do think that he is aware that physical skills require upkeep, and I do believe he continues to work very hard to hone his natural talents and keep himself sharp. Indeed, I think there's nobody that's as critical of him as he himself.

[balloonboyismyson]

Yellow fellow

Yellow: I want to confirm or debunk the myth of your existence

Call me sasquatch the way no one can guarantee what they saw was me

[ainyan]

amaryllis :   what is something or someone that your muse takes pride in ?how do they express that pride ?

Both you and @sasslett asked me this one!

Kal'istae beams. "Oh, I take a lot of pride in being good at what I do, and I express it by... well, by being good at what I do! I don't need to brag," she adds, with a slight blush, "but if I can make other people say 'wow' when I do something, then that makes me feel proud. I don't need to write a song about it or brag about it in my cups."

Thancred rolls his eyes. "Opposites attract."

Thank you for the ask!

[attroxx]

❛ @kezoire said . . . no one asked you to get involved. / botan ❜

𝙁𝙊𝙍 𝙊𝙉𝘾𝙀 𝙃𝙀'𝘿 𝙏𝙍𝙄𝙀𝘿 𝙏𝙊 𝘽𝙀 𝘽𝙍𝘼𝙑𝙀. botan so often struggled with reaching out. with connecting to others and sometimes he felt useless. maybe it was selfish to help the other. maybe he should have just left it alone . . . from the other's reaction that seems to be the case. he seems annoyed at best and botan can feel their entire body release the adrenaline that'd been built up. they suddenly feel exhausted. he winces, gaze quickly falling to the pavement. clearly this hadn't been his business to begin with so why did he intervene ? just to prove something to himself ? how stupid.

❛ you're right. i - i'm . . . i'm sorry. i shouldn't have . . . ❜ but the man was safe at the very least. botan finds solace in that. finally he forces his gaze up, meeting the other's still clearly irritated expression. ouch. ❛ are you hurt ? i have . . . a first aid kit somewhere . . . ❜ they begin to rummage through their backpack in a hurry.

grumpy vs sunshine meme . . . accepting.

[midnight-blue-blood]

🍓 bloem

You would be neither sweet nor bitter. Don't misunderstand, your clan does have a sweet taste more often than not. But for you, no. No, I think you'd have a more... hmm. A taste more like oak barrels or clove, I would think. Ah, like tobacco as it was produced while I was alive. A deeper flavor, regardless.

[hopes-memorial]

[Evil Former Friend] - Does your muse have any exes or ex-friends that they hate? Talk about them!

[Died In Your Arms Tonight] - Would your muse want to be alone as they die or have company? Would this change if the death was sudden and unexpected?

Botan Amai and sumire

Saddurday Ask Memes

[Evil Former Friend]

Amai: Their ex, Hasegawa, is the only person that they've ever been in a "relationship" with, and they're utterly terrified of him. It's really hard to describe it as a relationship even, but it's the only word that they can think of when it comes to it. To Amai, Hasegawa was only the lesser of two devils but still a devil nonetheless. A big part of the reason they're the way they are now is because of Hasegawa, and they aren't sure if it's better or worse than how they would be if they had never met him.

Botan: There are a few people that Botan refuses to think about anymore. Namely, there was a girl whose name he can't remember that tried to get close to him and Masao only to find out that she was the granddaughter of one of the people her father killed. She stabbed him and left him for dead in an alleyway. She's not around anymore, though.

Sumire: Other than her dolls and family, Sumire never really got close to a lot of people, nor did she have the chance to, so she doesn't really have a lot of former friends or any exes at all.

[Died In Your Arms Tonight]

Amai and Botan answered here (x)

Sumire: Sumire hopes that she'll have someone in her life when she dies, though she is afraid that she won't and she'll only have her dolls. Her grandfather won't live forever, and while she'll always have her dolls, they're not people... not in the way that she needs someone.

[sabraeal]

10, 19, 20, 30 :) ?

10. What fic made you feel the happiest to work on?

SO many of them, but I think some of my greatest joy comes from working on don't speak boyshit, simply because that is the quintessential "I wrote this fic for me and one other person" and so every bit of extra love it gets delights me to no end. There is no canon baiting for this pair. This is purely speculation and a wish to make the two grumpy ones kiss. It is one of two fics for this pair in the tag. It STILL has an improbable amount of hits AND I feel like it single handedly rehabilitated Maria's perception in the fandom. I cannot wait to get back to writing it in Feb/March.

19. Share your favorite opening line

It was on four legs that Obi had run to Sereg, and it was on four that he left it, the ever-night sky bright with its new constellations. Not the ones his mistress has taught him— the hunter with his shield and sword aloft, the vain queen turned on her head, the two plows that carving Boann’s furrow through the stars. None of those hang in this night, so new that the air still smells of smoke and steel, beeswax and lethe but a fading memory.

From A Fire's Light From Far Away.

20. Share your favorite ending line

“You?” His stomach flips, Lili’s eyes far too blue for comfort. Ah… Soowon didn’t mean to move.

From to all the ghosts still standing in this room.

30. What’s something that you want to write in 2024?

SO MANY THINGS. I'm exciting for every single one of my 1000 Followers fics, I'm planning to get back on board updating don't speak boyshit and whenever I view the moonlight, I'm really hoping to finally get to finish want your heart (to be for me). I've got something fun coming up for the Do-Si-Do that is going to be a longfic and I'd LOVE to get more done on that, plus budging the needle on literally anything else I've got to work on...I really like all the fics I write, so i'm always excited for ALL of them (until I actually have to work on them...)

2023 In Review

[singer-of-skyward-sonnets]

gladiolus :   describe a moment from your muse’s life that they will never forget .

Oh, heavens! Oh, could you imagine the pain of– of getting stuck in cheese?! EW! Well, Barbatos, unfortunately, doesn't have to imagine. 

The wisp had been floating around Gunnhildr’s house carelessly, basking in the mouth-watering smells coming from the grand table, when suddenly it bumped into one of the people. Stunned, it lost orientation and fell straight onto the dish the person was carrying – a cheesy lasagna. In panic, it wiggled chaotically, unable to break free from the cheesy, sticky, gooey mess. When it finally managed to fly off, it did so with half of the cheese still attached to it – the other half tragically ending up on the floor. At that moment, a boy picked up a piece of freshly-baked bread and proceeded to chase the crazed wisp, in the end managing to detain it against the slice’s surface. Obviously tired out from the whole endeavor, and with the part of cheese that still hung off of it weighing it down, the wisp didn’t have enough energy to lift itself; it had then simply laid down on the bread. That made for a perfect moment for picking it out of the offending goo and letting it rest in a more comfortable place. 

As for the bread with the cheese—

“What was that for, anyway?”

“I mean, this is actually kinda good!”

“You ate it?!”

“I even added tomatoes!”

… Oh, Heavens… Hopefully, you can only imagine – the pain of losing a dear one.

The wisp – Barbatos – knew: this is fate; this is what hath been foretold. He understands the importance of this sacrifice now. But then, back then—

Wisps cannot cry. Wisps don’t have the bodily functions of humans, he knows; perhaps it was just his body imitating that of one. He couldn’t stop it, couldn’t do anything as tremors wrecked his little silhouette, the feathers he carried persistently through snow and storm all the way there long forgotten on the dusty ground.

It’s not that he knew not of loss: his appearance may be misleading, but the fact is he has lived long before that, seen many things. But to lose a friend, a friend, in such an unfair, so unfair way… Nothing he has lived through could have prepared him for that.

Unable to communicate with words humans are able to comprehend, yet all he wanted was to scream – to shout, to yell, to cry – oh, cry, if only he could…

Thus has marked the beginning of his archonhood.

The world around fell silent, but for what’d sound better if spoken in laugh: 

"Fly, fly away, like a bird in the sky.

See the world on my behalf,

To the heavens may you fly..."

[peskyduck]

@dreamsofalife taught- forget - me - not :   has your muse ever forgotten something that is or was important to them ?   are they afraid of forgetting things like that ?  

Too many times, in fact he has a whole life he's forgotten. Anything that came before living in the funny little house has been forgotten. He might even have a job and a family. Who knows? He is afraid of forgetting the other two if he admits it.

[desertslegacy]

gladiolus :   describe a moment from your muse’s life that they will never forget .

It is hard to pick just one. Igrene's life is studded with quietly (and some less quiet) impactful moments.

Maybe she could list her father's funeral, as heavy in ceremony for the dignity of his position as it was a celebration of his life, beloved protector of Nabata, in a long line of Nabata's protectors.

Maybe she could mention when she first entered the desert on her own, the sun and the sky and the sand to expansive, so neverending that she felt as though she were being swallowed whole before she took one step forward, then another, then another into the wind.

Maybe she could mention finding a wounded man in the dunes, nursing him back to health, the gentle growth of their relationship blooming as his health flourished. Love is difficult to forget, especially the love of a man who disappeared into the quicksand with so many questions left behind.

Maybe she could discuss her daughter - from her birth, the hours of labor until she held the screaming little bundle in her arms for the first time, or the times that she greeted her upon her return from another successful patrol. Maybe she could mention the hollow hours that stretched into days as the life seeped from her daughter, holding her, screaming, crying, begging -

She could even, perhaps, recount the dread demon dragon she faced with Roy's army, the horrible sounds of so much death and despair in the air, the shrieking light of the Binding Blade as it came down upon the great beast's hide, and the delicate shimmering in the air as the dread demon dragon became merely a girl, merely Idunn.

But I think the moment that sticks in her mind first and foremost, which shaped her the most, is when once upon a time her father returned from his own war, with his own flame-haired lord, and presented her with a gift from their dear friends the Reglays: a bow. And a necklace.

[bxldrsdraumar]

hydrangea :   how much does your muse value communication in their relationships with others ?  are they prone to being misunderstood ?

Why, did you have something you wanted to talk about, Julius?

Sigurd is such an open, trusting man, and any miscommunications or misunderstandings are likely to stem from him misunderstanding or ignoring what someone else is attempting to communicate.

I believe that he does value communication (or perhaps more likely that he says he does), but that he places more trust in his own intuition than he necessarily does in the words that people say to him - this can be for good or for ill, and perhaps even sometimes it can seem as though he doesn't trust other people (for example, when Deirdre insists that she should stay by his side when he attempts to leave her behind in Augusty).

The fact of the matter is that Sigurd can often be a very stubborn, hard-headed individual, and this likely stems from his lot in life: he's a highborn man with Major Holy blood, so it would follow that (even if he's wrong), he is simply used to being listened to out of hand without necessarily needing input from other sources to make his decisions. One cannot accuse Sigurd of Chalphy of being indecisive, bless his heart.

Unfortunately, in the real world, this can often lead to relationships of all kinds where communication might feel very one-sided if someone isn't being listened to, whereas someone like Sigurd may be taken aback if he is accused of being a poor listener. He will attempt to course correct if these kinds of things are pointed out by someone (as we see with Lewyn's recruitment conversation), but often he lives a bit in blissful ignorance, assuming that everything's great because he feels good about things.

[peerlessscowl]

hibiscus :   how does your muse view the gentler ,   daintier things in life ?   as things worth preserving   &   caring for ,   or things only bound to wither   &   disappear ?

(@solmtinel and @luminousrider who asked the same)

Popular question for Raven, and it's easy to see why. With his background and character conceit, it would be real easy to assume that Raven is a follower of the Survival of the Fittest ethos, and from the rough exterior that he throws up one might assume that he's disdainful of soft things, or one to be disappointed by their transient nature.

But this couldn't be further from the truth.

Before we dive into his background and supports, I want to point out a detail in his character creation: his name. Raymond as a name (pointed out by Lilina in their first thread) means "protector", specifically "protecting hands". Odd name to give to a character who only wants revenge, right?

Well, let's look at it. (Cut for length)

What does he want revenge for? His family. It seems straightforward enough. But we must dig a little further - the fall of House Cornwell was precipitated by allegations of embezzlement which had the house dissolved and removed from the Lycian League, and ultimately led to the suicide of his mother and father (and presumably others). Due to the shame from such a scandal, different characters seem to have slightly different stories, and in the confusion the story Raven got was that his family was framed for political gain, taken advantage of for their kindness.

(This turns out to be half true, as we learn from Oswin that Marquess Cornwell took on the debts of those in his march, and was so buried under the debts that he tried to steal funds from the League to cover it. Again, the theme of a protector who is willing to dirty his own hands to spare others.)

So he sees the dissolution of his house not only as a political ploy, but of a stronger house removing a weaker house, and this drives him to fury.

But that seems mighty personal, doesn't it. That doesn't necessarily prove anything. So let's look at his conversations with those that are weaker and softer than him - Lucius, Priscilla, and Rebecca.

In his Lucius supports we see Raven at his most volatile, which is an interesting detail that I've discussed before, but we also see him at his most tender. He starts each of these supports with a question that many with illness (chronic, mental or otherwise) are familiar with: how are you today? Innocuous until you look at the phrasing - still under the weather? No fits today? He is keeping a watchful eye on Lucius, knowing that he is of a weaker constitution than himself, and checks in regularly.

But that's his best friend. How about someone else? Priscilla is someone that he lost quite young (when he was 9 and she was 6), and it is clear that he still loves her a great deal despite the time and distance that separated them. He remembers clearly times when they were young children, and indeed only joins the army at her behest - and yet their support chain is another instance of Raven being particularly aggressive. You are planning something dangerous she says - I don't want you getting involved he says. He misses her so dearly, but knows that proximity to him is likely to get her injured or worse - and yet in the end, he would abandon all else rather than his baby sister.

But okay, that's his sister. He's allowed to be a little biased. What about a stranger? How about Rebecca? Rebecca's conversation with Raven is one of my favorites because it emphasizes his softest characteristics. She accidentally wakes him from a nap because she cannot string her bow correctly, and rather than chastise her, he takes the responsibility on himself - and asks her to do the same moving forward. And when she thanks him, he opens up to her, although indirectly, which causes her to break into tears - which, most importantly, he doesn't flinch away from. He doesn't get uncomfortable, he doesn't scold her - he acknowledges that she is soft, that she is still a child (and perhaps with the implication that she deserves to keep being a child).

Raven is not a soft man. His world and his circumstances have not allowed him to be. But he will fight tooth and nail to ensure that everyone else gets their chance at softness, because that is something that other people deserve.

[robin-evry]

pppsssstttt hey~ mothman yuu for twisted wonderland, imagine the chaos, the memes

Sure thing, ask and you shall receive

𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐈𝐅 𝐘𝐔𝐔 𝐈𝐒 𝐀 𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐌𝐀𝐍 💡

Mothman, in West Virginian folklore, is a humanoid creature reportedly seen in the Point Pleasant area from November 15, 1966, to December 15, 1967. The first newspaper report was published in the Point Pleasant Register, dated November 16, 1966, titled "Couples See Man-Sized Bird ... Creature ... Something". The national press soon picked up the reports and helped spread the story across the United States. The source of the legend is believed to have originated from sightings of out-of-migration sandhill cranes or herons.

Mothman!yuu would look really intimidating towards all of NRC, during one night they are exploring NRC and see a car moving, following their natural instincts to follow light and moving objects. They hopped on the car roof and tried to lift it but the passenger fired a magic spell that scared them and caused them to return back to the ramshackle dorm.

This created a legend of them in twst about a creature that is attracted to light. It becomes a local legend in NRC and many people would try to capture the creature.

Meanwhile mothman!yuu is blissfully unaware of the legend being about them and thought it was some other creature.

Mothman!Yuu is introverted and observant, preferring solitude and quiet places like the Ramshackle Dorm or the garden at night. They communicate softly, often using body language, and enjoy listening more than speaking. Despite their quiet demeanor, Yuu is deeply compassionate and protective of those they care about, silently watching over their friends like a guardian in the dark.

They Have an odd obsession with lamps and lights, often staring at them in awe, and other students have caught them sitting by a lamp for hours, entranced as well to be attracted into moving objects. They also have a habit of fluttering their wings when nervous or excited, making a soft, soothing sound.

During one of idia long walks at night, mothman!yuu see this and would try to hug idia due to their attraction to light. in idia eyes this giant creature with wings and large red eyes is chasing him causing him to bolt it out of there.

Mothman! yuu is a loveable goofball or should I say fluff ball since around their neck they have a ball of fluff around their neck which is basically their scales, even tho they are adorable at far and at night or during the dark their appearance is actually very scary or intimidating. They look like a humanoid creature with large wings and glowing eyes.

First meeting with malleus, malleus was walking and found a mothman!yuu hugging a lamp post and question what they are doing. Mothman!yuu just looked at him and continued admiring the lamp.

Mothman!Yuu is particularly sensitive to bright light during the day and tends to be more active at night. Their wings can get damaged easily if they aren’t careful, so they’re cautious in battles or physical activities.

Mothman!Yuu is much more active at night, often staying up well past midnight, finding the school grounds calming and peaceful when everyone else is asleep. They sleep during the day, which sometimes causes issues with classes. However, Crowley allows them to take night classes or study independently since Mothman!Yuu excels in their own time. During the day, they might be seen dozing in quiet corners, wrapped up in their cloak like a cocoon.

Mothman Yuu loves to explore the campus at night. They've memorized every hidden corner of NRC, knowing all the best spots for stargazing or simply enjoying the quiet. They often find peace in the botanical garden, surrounded by moonlit flowers, or the rooftop, where they can spread their wings and feel the night breeze.

During the day, they wear a large hat or hood to shield themselves from the sun. Sudden bright lights make them squint or retreat, and if it’s too intense, they can even get dizzy. They prefer dimly lit rooms and gravitate toward dark, shadowy spaces.

Mothman!yuu is technically mute since they don't have a mouth so they usually carry a book and paper to communicate or use sign language.

When someone is upset, they often doesn’t need words to comfort them. Instead, they offer their presence, staying close and using their wings to envelop their friends in a soft, protective embrace. This has a calming effect, almost like a gentle hug from a comforting presence in the night.

Mothman Yuu can’t resist the soft glow of lamps, especially old-fashioned lanterns. They often get lost staring at them, much to the amusement of their friends. When stressed or needing comfort, Yuu seeks out warm lights, finding peace in the flickering glow.

Mothman Yuu gets distracted easily by bright lights, so when someone opens a window or flicks on a particularly bright light during class, they have an unfortunate habit of darting toward it without thinking. There have been multiple instances of them awkwardly crashing into windows, doors, or even students. One time, mothman Yuu tackled Ace during a midnight hallway patrol, mistaking the lantern he was holding for something irresistible. It’s now a running gag, and Ace loves teasing them with lanterns.

It’s become an inside joke around NRC that Mothman!Yuu is magnetically drawn to lamps. Whenever there’s a lamp nearby, they just… drift toward it without realizing. During study sessions, Deuce once had to physically drag them away from a table lamp because they had zoned out completely, mesmerized by the glow. Grim now makes sure to “lamp-proof” their dorm room, or else they might stare at a lamp for hours, lost in thought.

Mothman!yuu have camouflage abilities are so good that they’ve accidentally made people think the Ramshackle Dorm is haunted. Students will sometimes walk in, see them hanging upside down from the ceiling or perched silently on top of a bookshelf, and freak out thinking it’s a ghost. They finds it funny but doesn’t understand why people scream every time. Grim is the only one unfazed by their tendency to "disappear" into the background, often sitting on their wings or tail without realizing they’re there.

Whenever anyone sneaks into the Ramshackle Dorm at night, their heightened senses immediately pick up on it… but instead of confronting intruders, Yuu has a special tactic. They silently appear right behind the person, standing still, unblinking. This has led to multiple students fainting or bolting from the dorm, thinking they’ve encountered a terrifying ghost. They never say a word, just stand there, with their eyes wide and wings gently fluttering behind them.

They also have a habit of staring problem, they just stare like they're in a staring contest. No blinking, no movement—just wide, intense eyes. This has freaked out many students who’ve caught them staring in their direction, only to realize Yuu wasn’t looking at them, but at the lamp behind them. mothman!yuu can go hours without blinking.

Mothman!Yuu’s habit of staring has unintentionally earned them a reputation as creepy or intimidating. First-years are terrified when they catch Yuu watching them in class or during lunch, only to realize later that they weren't paying attention to them at all—they were staring at a random window reflection. Trey once had to assure a panicked student that they aren't plotting anything, they’re just… entranced by something shiny.