#boo hiss we hate it

[tarantula-hawk-wasp]

i pay my fees for the semester and check my email and the next email i get is my utility bill and then when i finish paying that the next email is my internet bill and like *gagging* adulthood really is just paying money right and left

[2rose2furious]

trying so hard to enjoy this years eurovision but all the loreen hate is just ruining it for me. im getting so upset because people are being so cruel towards something and someone i love.

[blueberrypancakesworld]

I am yours and never ours

Caracalla x wife!reader

warning : Spoilers for Gladiator ii, hurt/comfort, kissing, implied mother issues, mention of violence, cuddling, no use of y/n

Summary : It was a mistake to kill the hero, to not give him the mercy he should have received. The riots a sign of overthrow and fall and entrenched in the palace the two brothers and Caracalla's wife, nerves are thin and after a forgetting of temper it seems only love can calm a frightened Caracalla to bring order to the situation.

info : omg the scene was so sad and tense, the bond between the two, i'm fully in my gladiator era. Have fun reading :)

masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had only taken a fraction of a moment, the sun had been right over the Colosseum, giving everyone a chance to get their bearings. Shouts of cheers, boos and cries mingled with the loud voice of Rome.

The emperors sitting impatiently on their chairs, the younger one screaming for death at last, the older one seeming to grow more agitated with every breath, and in the centre the weeping princess as the arrows pierced her beloved.

Justus Acacius was dead, unjustly killed despite the surrender of both fighters, a death that had the emperors rejoicing, but a death that only a few hours later at nightfall had the people roaring.

What at first was still disbelief and shock had become a popular uprising, at the latest with the tumult, the flames raging in the streets and the numerous courageous citizens.

The two brothers also became aware of the uprising and the royal family withdrew in disbelief and indignation to avoid being drawn into it.

Even the Sun of Rome, Caracalla's wife, could not reassure the people who loved her; they seemed to hate her as much as her husband and brother-in-law.

Looking out from behind the solid walls of the palace, she saw the metre-high flames, saw the angry crowd and the few troops of the emperors who could hardly do anything.

Gods have mercy on us she thought and took another sip from her glass as she heard more screams of death and moved away from the window, going back to her family but seeing only the same tension in Geta.

Rarely had she seen him like this if he didn't burst under the pressure at any moment so she was sure he would storm out himself, ,,There may be many but they don't have the weapons and courage of our troops" she said calmly and tried to pour Geta another glass but he turned away.

His gaze had barely noticed her so absorbed he seemed to be thinking about how he could save them all, ,,Ungrateful" he hissed as he looked out and saw nothing but treachery.

The silence in the palace was interrupted only by the footsteps of Macrinus, who withdrew in her presence, she did not trust him and he did not trust her, but her concern lay more with her beloved Caracalla.

She glanced at her husband, who was sitting on a lectus and feeding Dundus his little monkey to calm himself down somehow. However, he looked just as miserable as his brother, they both looked tired, exhausted and completely overwhelmed by everything.

She gave him a smile, trying to keep him amused, ,,You'll all see blood," Caracalla said, returning the smile - it was to be expected that he wanted a whole bloodlust. A betrayal hurts deeply.

Even if it hurt inside her, helplessness and fear had a grip on her too…only Dundus the monkey seemed happy as he let out another little screech when he got a grape.

A mistake.

All of a sudden all she could see was Geta hurrying around, ,,Get that annoying monkey out of here!" shouting at his brother and slapping the wine in his brother's face.

Startled, she gasped, calling out Geta's name in warning, his eyes filled with anger and remorse, she knew it was the situation, knew the tension but nothing would help.

As she hurried over to Caracalla and gently placed her hand on his shoulder, he looked more like a weeping dog than an emperor, ,,Come my king, we should feed Dundus somewhere else" she said, helping him up slightly and telling him to go ahead into the throne room.

She walked past Geta who just looked down shaking his head and cursing himself, he had taken it too far. ,,I'll be right back why don't you get us some wine Macrinus" she said and didn't bother because his fake smile told her all she needed to know as he disappeared and she sighed and hurried on her way.

Her footsteps echoed in the empty corridors and the throne room, Dundus shrieked and she heard the sniffle, ,,Love? My King Caracalla, where are you?" she asked quietly, swallowing down the lump rising in her throat as she thought back to the episodes he had already had.

She and Geta loved him but this madness would be the downfall of them all. She continued to walk around the room, first looking behind the throne where he sometimes hid, but he wasn't sitting there.

,,Caracalla? It's your sun, do you understand?" she asked and finally saw the blond head of hair peeking out from behind one of the curtains behind which he had curled up.

She heard his crying, the sniffling as he peeked out from behind it and she got down on her knees, ,,It's-It's all right, come here to me, you know who I am, don't you?" she continued to ask calmly, hiding the slight trembling in her hands under the fabric of her clothes as she saw the man she loved so fragile.

Slowly he emerged from his ‘hiding place’ and nodded cautiously as he crawled towards her, ,,You…you're my wife," he sniffled his words barely intelligible as Dundus continued to tote on his shoulders and the chain rattled.

Nodding hastily, she smiled slightly relieved that he at least recognised her, sitting in front of her probably not quite knowing what he wanted or needed, ,,You are mine" he seemed to understand instead as he placed his hand on hers and she didn't pull it away.

Yours, mine, ours words she had heard so often, she was his wife but our joy.

It's like a coin with two sides only one can come up and the other stays in the shadow, only the balance on the edge can go but with enormous precision or trust and love…something that was all the more difficult at such a time between the two brothers.

She nodded again and pulled him close, lying in her lap like a boy with his mother, his, ,,I'm yours," she assured him, carefully using the sleeve of her dress to wipe his face.

Mostly delusional, she quickly realised that he was like a small child who simply needed her mother, a woman who had died at an early age and she filled that role.

An initial squirming soon turned into an amused laugh as she wiped the wine from his face and at least he wasn't crying, ,,Tickled" he muttered and she couldn't help but smile bitterly, the delusion was a horror and a blessing in one.

Another coin.

Dundus played with the blond curls as Caracalla's fingers, which had been playing with each other before, slid to hers, ,,He's been hurting me since we were sin the womb, you're not his or ours…you're mine…like Rome should be mine," he suddenly said, gripping her tighter.

Blue eyes showed the fire of madness and she stroked his cheek, she knew the story of the womb, but she knew just as well that madness could be transmitted by whores, was it a lie or the truth?

Trying to stifle a shaky breath, she placed a kiss on his lips, tasting the wine, tasting sage and tasting blood, ,,You two are like the creators of Rome, two sides my love. But think what Geta has done for you, for me, for all of Rome…you are the king, Geta is the god and I am the sun," she reminded him of the story she had made up during one of his episodes.

Caracalla a king of honour who could have all the blood in the world, his brother the political god and she the sun who held them all together.

A story that made him pause, his memories shrouded in mist, he needed time while she continued to hold him gently and stroke his cheek, his grip on her hand tightening and softening, ,,Yes? Yes, I think so…I think so...despite the pain, I-I still have you" he slowly realised and sanity returned to his being.

As he cuddled up to her and laid his head in the crook of her neck and held her like that for a moment, tears in her eyes as she blinked them away and thanked the gods again that nothing bad had happened.

Caracalla's hand was also on her cheek and she saw the gold tooth as she smiled, ,,Thank you my sun" she heard him say before he pulled her into a kiss, finally back to her senses as he slowly pulled away from her and helped her stand up.

Despite the riots, despite Geta and despite the madness, the Emperor was still here, gently grasping her hand and once more locking her in a kiss, even if Rome fell they would not give up trying to help him out of this doom.

From the moment she had taken him as her husband, she knew that she would always be there for him and that Caracalla would never stop loving her. Because even in madness there was nothing stronger than love.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

@potatoesenpaii , @rainbowbox , @thankyouperconte , @myromanempire81 , @k-yurieee

[satorusugurugurl]

sukuna with roadtrip lmao, i feel like it would be interesting

have a great day boo

Road Trips and Fireworks

Summary: Marie’s Summer Fest prompt: road trip and fireworks!

Pairing: Ryomen Sukuna(Modern AU)x AFAB!Reader

Warnings: oral sex (male receiving), road head (please be safe), sex, car sex, outdoor smut, smut, p in v, unprotected sex, degrading, dirty talk

Word Count: 1,793

A/N: hi nonnie! Thatnks for the request I hope you have a great day too!! 💚i combined two requests! (I wanted the firework one 🎆🙂‍↕️) we have a few more of these to get through, I'm working on requests as well!! Trying to get a bunch done since I'm going on a company retreat this weekend to a resort!

Summer was the perfect time to take vacations. While flying or taking a train was nice to get to your destination, road trips were sometimes even more fun. They were filled with junk food and the wind in your hair, all while you got to sit next to your boyfriend as a passenger princess. You couldn’t have thought of a better way to spend your vacation.

However, there was a single minuscule flaw in your perfect road trip: your boyfriend’s road rage.

Sukuna didn’t drive like a maniac or follow cars in and out of traffic, chasing them down. He would never put you or anyone else at risk. However, he had a terrible habit of flipping cars off and dropping every curse word in the book. Usually, he would let every situation roll off his back like water. This road trip was already stressful, just an hour and forty-five minutes drive. Sukuna managed to avoid two accidents while driving to Kyoto in that short time. Several people had flipped your big-tatted boyfriend off and paled once he snarled at them himself. All the while, he had managed to drop several different ‘fucks’ in twenty minutes.

Your poor boyfriend was tense, gripping the steering wheel with a firm white knuckle grip while you popped a potato chip into his mouth. He angrily crunched down on it with a scowl, one you were wincing at. So far, your summer road trip was turning out not to be what you had imagined. And you'd only started the drive; you still had another day of driving ahead. How was your pent-up boyfriend going to survive? Luckily for you, you knew just the way to calm him down.

“Motherfuckin’ bitch ass—” Sukuna snarled out as you slowly reached over, rubbing his crotch. “Nngh hey what the fu—” not wasting a second. You winked at him before you unbuckled your seatbelt, leaning over the console, stroking him through his pants. “Oooh fuck, as much as I like getting my dick sucked, I’m a little upset. It’s not fair that you’re doing this while I have to focus on driving when I would rather watch you.”

“Well, life isn’t always fair, now is it?” You stuck out your tongue, pulling his shorts down once his cock was hard enough. “All you need to do is focus on the road. Let me take care of the rest.”

Stealing a glance up at your boyfriend, you watched him gulp. The orange hue from the setting sun highlighted his handsome features and facial tattoos as he clenched his jaw; his crimson eyes moved from the road, hands gripping the steering wheel tighter as he looked down, watching you for a split second. The instant his eyes drifted back to the road. You pulled his cock out of the slit in his boxers before you started trailing kisses up the underside of his cock. The muscles in his thighs tighten under the ministrations of your soft lips against his sensitive veins, your tongue flicking over the metal stud of his frenum piercing.

“Fuck,” Sukuna hisses out through his teeth as he throws in your hand and against your tongue. “You fuckin’ tease.”

“Oh, don’t act like you don’t like it when I tease you, you Kuna~”

“You know for a fact that I fucking hate teasing.” He responded with no heat in his voice.

“Oooh, right, I forgot about that.”

“Fuckin’ watch yourself brat.” You smirked, flattening your tongue over the tip, soaking in the way your boyfriend cursed above you, “G-Gaah, you little shit—”

“Oooh, I'm so sorry, my lord. I won't tease; I’ll make you feel better in just a second.”

Sukuna’s mouth dropped open as you took his entire length into your mouth, sucking on it as you bobbed your head up and down slowly. Your eyes shut as you relaxed your throat, taking more of him down and gagging around him as he hit the back of your throat. Your boyfriend’s abdomen muscles clenched as you set a fast pace, moving faster, hollowing your cheeks with each bob of your head. The salty, sweet taste of pre-cum was mouthwatering, causing drool to seep out of the corners of your mouth as you exhale through your nose, trying to take his length down your throat.

Sukuna gritted his teeth so hard he thought they'd crack. His eyes kept leaving the road for seconds to watch your bobbing head move up and down, sucking him off, drool pooling around the base of his cock. He understood that you were trying to help him relax, but seeing you sucking him off, so messily had him tenser as he resisted the urge to swerve off to the side and fuck your face. But fuck, it was hard, especially when you reached down with your hands, one wrapping around his shaft, while the other gently began massaging his balls and time with your sucking. Your boyfriend blew a hot, gravelly breath as he dropped his left hand off the steering wheel, grabbing a handful of your hair.

Before you can look up at him with faux innocence and confusion, Sukuna forces you down his length, making tears prick your eyes as you gag. Your nose presses against we-trimmed, pink pubes as the head of his cock slides down your throat. The warmth of your saliva around his skin makes Sukuna chuckle deeply from above you before he breathes heavily and lets out a moan before his laughter floods your ears as he pulls your hair, bringing you off his length before shoving you back down on it, making you gag harder

“I might not be able to fuck your face like I want to, but I’ll make do.” The dark tone that leaves your boyfriend‘s mouth makes your panties wet as the sun sets darkness and envelops the car aside from the dashboard, showing the GPS to the B and B. “Mhmm, I felt you moan. Do you like being made a fuck toy? My little cum slut.”

“Mhmm—”

“Do you want my cum down your throat?”

“Mhmm!!” you’re gagging around him as your boyfriend pushes you further down, cock twitching inside your throat as his balls clench.

“Then fucking swallow.”

Spurts of cum, flood your mouth, coating your tongue and rolling down the back of your throat. Your eyes flood with tears as you try to take it all down, choking on it. Above you, your boyfriend snorts a laugh, licking his lips as he breathes heavily. As soon as you finish swallowing his cum you pull off of his length. You shift your legs, feeling how wet you are as your boyfriend lets go of your hair, turning the blinker on as you wipe the back of your mouth off with your hand.

Once your mouth is thoroughly cleaned, you take the time to look at your boyfriend's state. His eyes are narrowed, and his chest rises and falls as the car is slowly pulled off the next exit of the highway. The electronic voice of the GPS tells you that it is redirecting the following route as Sukuna finds a safe spot off of the road before he turns to face you.

You don’t have a chance to think of whether you want to beg for mercy or tease him more. Any attempts at conversing with him are cut off as a firework bursts into colorful light in the dark sky. The red color illuminated the inside of the car, showing you the smirk on your boyfriend’s face as he unbuckles his seatbelt

“Let’s get out and watch fireworks.”

Five minutes later, you’re being pressed against the warm hood of the car, your bare breasts rubbing over the metal as your cries are sharp and loud as your boyfriend snaps his hips forward, filling your aching cunt with his long, hard cock. You turn your head, closing your eyes as you focus on the pure pleasure, only to have your boyfriend grab your head, forcing it up as he bullies his tip against your cervix.

“Thought you would like to look at the fireworks.” His voice growls in your ear before his sharp teeth snap on your earlobe. “Look up at them kitten.”

“I can’t, I can’t!” You bite down on the inside of your cheek as your boyfriend laughs deeply in your ear.

“And why is it you can’t?” Explosions of blues, greens, reds, and gold light up the night sky, illuminating your skin that ripples with your boyfriend. You’re bent over so nicely that it allows your boyfriend to slam into your g-spot with each thrust making your walls tighten around his cock.

“Is it because you’re going to cum~? God fuck, I know you’re close.”

“Yes! Yes, please, Kuna, please.”

“Heh, good fucking slut begging for me to make you feel good.” His free hand leaves your hip, reaching down and rubbing your clit back and forth fast. “Hold it for me, though.”

“But Kuna!”

“I fucking said to hold it” Your legs start shaking while your boyfriend's cock splits you open. It isn’t until you hear the whistling of a firework being shot that your boyfriend snarls in your ear. “Fucking cum for me right fuckin’ now.”

Fireworks exploded above you as you came hard, gushing all over your boyfriend‘s cock. The intensity of your orgasm left your head feeling fuzzy as you listened to your boyfriend grunting and growling behind you until you felt the warmth of his cum filling you up. Sukuna keeps moving until the both of you are panting heavily, bodies illuminated by more fireworks above you, while you savor the lasting fireworks bursting inside your body

“You good?” Your boyfriend breathes out against your ear as he slowly pulls out of you.

“M’ on cloud nine. How are you less stressed now?”

Your boyfriend scuffs slowly, lifting you into his arms, walking back to the passenger side of his car, and placing you inside. “I guess I’m okay.” He can see the confusion and panic that cross your features for a second.

“You’re just okay?”

“Yeah, just okay, because I’m fucking starving.” He forces your legs wide open. “But if you let me enjoy this meal before we get back on the road, I’ll be fan-fucking-tastic, so just lie back and enjoy the fireworks kitten.”

Forever Tag List:

@darkstarlight82 @pandoness @nealeart @simp-plague @sugurubabe @chilichopsticks @reap3erslov3

Summer Fest Tag List:

@typicalife-101

[mixterglacia]

"oh, ellison would have hated these new IHNMAIMS fans! they don't get it!"

Babe. He literally went on record to say he despises all of his fans. Dude was a piss ant over everyone.

He hates you too, we aren't special.

Also for those getting all twisted up over folks saying AM would make a great teenage girl, you gotta realize that it's a joke. I'm autistic and I see that it's a very obvious bit.

Beyond that, let's be real. AM is just a TEENAGER regardless of gender. He has the vitriol and rhetoric of a teen boy with the pettiness of a teen girl (if we're speaking in a strictly stereotypical manner)

He figured out how to blow raspberries. He boos and hisses at the groups private moments.

Dude's an oversized teen.

Also I really don't get why people are so up in arms about folks joking that he would be a big fan of the Sims. "Oh it's so stupid and silly and out of character with the text"

No shit, babe. It's a funny "what if".

Also if he had the motivation to play games, he absolutely would adore the Sims. Not that he'd ever admit it. He gets to play god and would know every little thing about the games. He'd be the one who makes videos every time a new death is added on how quickly he could make it happen.

He'd be the guy that knows any game inside and out. He'd make the most incredible walkthroughs, but mock you relentlessly for using them.

"OH. YOU NEED MY HELP? WHY DON'T YOU TRY GETTING BETTER, HM? IT'S NOT ROCKET SCIENCE YOU LOSER."

It's all in good fun. The whole 'canon vs fanon' argument uses to be a decently fun game but now it's being used as an excuse to bully people.

I may disagree with how some folks view AM, but they're allowed to see him like that. I'm not going to go out of my way to pick fights with people over a fictional supercomputer. Not saying folks shouldn't engage in civil discussion about these things, but y'all don't need to get into fights.

More often than not, it's a joke. Have fun, babes.

Also I get the instinct to push back against humanizations of AM. Don't be a bitch. Many times it's just an exercise for the artist. There's also people that just don't want to draw machinery. I really don't blame them, that shit is ROUGH.

Everyone has times where they can't/don't want to draw certain things. Like I used to exclusively draw canines and didn't get used to drawing humans until I got used to drawing anthro.

If you need to vent, that's perfectly fine. Venting in your own blog is healthy and encouraged. (I mean, look at me. XD) But when you go out of your way to attack folks directly, you're just being a dick.

[charlesemersonwinchesteriii]

Things that I have learned about A Stitch In Time after finishing Part II of the audiobook:

Ohhhhhh you are all heartless bastards I cannot BELIEVE none of you thought to tell me about goalkeeper Garak. When I tell you I lost my fucking mind!!!!!!!

HANS JORTS I OWE YOU MY LIFE FOR THAT ONE FR

The Tain reveal. The Tolan interactions. The Mila interactions. The final Tolan reveal. The way this book will not let me rest for a single god damn second.

SHE MARRIED HER OWN BROTHER TO HIDE THE FACT HER EMPLOYER GOT HER PREGNANT??????? NASTY YUCKY TRASHY PLANET <3<3<3<3<3<3

I recently read in an article how Mr. Robinson said the Bamarren bits were his favorite to write and imo you can really tell cause the plot seemed much less tight in Part II but it was still sooooooo good and soooooo much fun precisely because I had no fucking idea what was going to happen from sentence to sentence. I love this book I love this book I love this book I love this book--

PALANTIR X CINNABON 1 CRINGEFAIL MARRIAGE REAL >:3 HUGE WIN FOR ME PERSONALLY even if at least one of them IS still dead and it IS Garak's "fault" (he was sooo right to do that though <3) so I did not get everything I wished for. but still.

Oh hey speaking of weird threesomes Garak gets inadvertently sucked into, remember the judge and his "lady friend" who let Garak live in their house for free and sat there openly leering at their new handsome young tenant doing manual labor out in the hot sunshine? Elim babygirl it was NOT the orchids that got you that living arrangement.........

Ok this isn't funny or relatable to anyone else but as a queer religious person the Oralius storyline makes me so excited and happy I love it I love it I love it it's so much more and better than anything I was expecting I love the Hebitian lore I love Palandine and Tolan being the ones to encourage this in him I love his visions and his nightmares I love him talking to Julian about it I love him singing in church I love Oralius and I love you Mr. Robinson

The way Pythas has been Garak's foil each step of the way, succeeding every time he fails and taking everything that was meant for him. And every time Garak is just like [nodding approvingly] That's my bestie and he deserves nothing less! <3

The Pythas situation and the Palandine situation combined are both adorable and insane to me. Garak really said if you showed me even one single shred of kindness in highschool I am ride or die for you for life. Cinnabon 1 really was the dumbest bitch ever huh

[Dukat Sr. voice] the same people who want us to KISS THE FEDERATION'S ASS!!!!!!

greatest book I have ever read. one trillion out of ten. no notes.

Things that I know about A Stitch In Time prior to listening to it:

Garak goes to spy school, which is for spies (for some reason the idea of this is amusing to me. like I get it duh of course the Order must have some sort of training system but also. fanfic ass trope. Spy School! For Spies! it's even a boarding school and everything. DARKEST ACADEMIA)

Garak performs a classic bisexual rite of passage by falling in love with both members of an older(?) married couple (or well textually probably only the wife. I feel like I'd have heard about it if he were Betacanonically Queer (TM) in this book. but here's hoping I'll be astonished while listening!)

I can't remember if I read anything specific about it or not but just based on vibes alone I do not have high hopes for this couple's like. life expectancy.

Based on vibes alone I do not have high hopes for ANY character's life expectancy in this book tbh. If it involves Cardassians in general and Garak in specific I usually just assume everyone involved is doomed. This is going to be a FUN 12 hours and 28 minutes!

There was a post somewhere that mentioned that some supernatural magical stuff happens in this book and I'm SO FUCKING STOKED. HERE'S HOW GARAK ORB EXPERIENCE CAN STILL WIN!!!!

The entire concept of this book is so funny to me. Garak goes 7 years being ohhh so mysterious to Julian about himself or his past and then just spills his whole life story to him in a letter as soon as they're separated. Babygirl is going through Bashir Withdrawal Syndrome.

Most importantly KELAS MY BEST FRIEND KELAS FROM ONE (1) LINE OF CANON!!!!! I have no actual evidence that he ever shows up in this book but like he has to right. right. he's absolutely everywhere on ao3 y'all had to have gotten him from somewhere. I assume.

[maxwell-grant]

I'm seeing several popular react to the Penguin show with "God I wanna see Batman kick his ass in the next movie". Which, for a show about a Batman villain, is probably an indication of succeess

Are you kidding me it fucking rules, there's no "probably" here, the show couldn't possibly have achieved what it set out to do harder.

I've talked with people, as Episode 7 was coming out, that they've managed to strike this perfect balance between making Oz the fun engaging protagonist to watch, and making him a villain that we'll want to face justice, opposite Sofia who tread the line between his Batman Villain arch-nemesis as well as the closest the show has to a hero. The camera loves her, the costume designers and hair stylists love her, the showrunner calls her the hero of the show, production folks who go on the podcast talk about how she was their favorite character to work on, while Oz, the protagonist, only grew darker and more despised and more fucked-up as the weeks passed, as we sit through 8 hours chipping away at all of his fun and charm and wacko comedy antics and motivations and all the scruples and principles that he turns out to have less and less of, that become less and less useful to him, until he butchers them all in the very end along with the heart of the show.

As I saw it around week 6, by the time this thing was over, Sofia would demand to be received with tragic applause and heartbreak and whooping cheers and love, but Oswald would have the children of the world booing and hissing and throwing eggs and tomatoes at him, and then asking him to come back so they can do it again. AND I WAS RIGHT, and also I WILDLY underestimated the degree to which that would be warranted, and I certainly didn't expect that, for the first time in my life, I would be unconditionally and enthusiastically on the same side as everyone who posted that Arkham scene, where Batman picks up Penguin and smashes him against a mirror, as something Battison has to do in the next movie. I couldn't believe what a stab to the heart that last episode was.

I'l get into the specifics of why this worked more on the Episode 8 breakdown and, granted, it's a lot to conciliate still, it's genuinely a strange feeling to be onboard with everyone else who wants Penguin to be flattened and crushed and humiliated, to truly hate him as a loathsome monster for the first time ever even as I love him in so many new fucked-up ways. This is, make no mistake, the good version of the Joker's Asylum one-off, Pain and Prejudice, Bullies, all those modern stories that are ultimately about nothing more than reminding you of a super-duper serious evil bastard this funny little man is, stories I generally just find too dumb and reductive and ugly and tasteless and trying so very damn hard to be scary without working for it. This was Lauren LeFranc slam dunking everyone who's picked up this character since Jason Aaron in 2007, including Jason Aaron himself, and wherever they take him in the next movie, or if they can justify another season of this, they've fully set him up more than ever as a guy we will want to be exploded by the Batmobile, that he not only fully deserves it, but must, be defeated for good.

Beyond impressed, don't think I could have ever anticipated how much I wanted this.

[trainsinanime]

Lots of people talking about Alya salt again (boo! Hiss! Leave her alone, she’s awesome!). In the context of that, I’m seeing discussions of her interview with Lila. Stuff like:

Does she deserve hate for it? (No)

Is it a big deal? (No)

Did she have any way of verifying Lila’s claim that she’s Ladybug’s best friend, especially when Ladybug herself wasn’t saying anything one way or the other? (No)

Did she pretend to her audience that she verified Lila’s claim? (We don’t know, probably no)

Does she normally verify people connected to the (secretive) super heroes? E.g. did she check that she was really interviewing Ladybug and not just her friend Marinette in a costume? Should we expect her to? (No)

Does any of the Alya salt have any basis in reality? (No)

All good and useful questions, but I think after years of debating these points, we’ve all missed the really important one:

What exactly did Lila say during the interview?

The thing is that Lila doesn’t actually know a lot about the stuff she’s making up, and she’d try to use the interview to only talk about herself. I can’t imagine Alya would be very interested in that, and she’d try to steer the conversation back to Ladybug and what she’s like, stuff that Lila knows nothing about.

So my guess is that this interview would end with,

“Very interesting, thank you! That was Lila Rossi, she’s says she’s Ladybug’s best friend, and according to her Ladybug is red with black spots. That’s all we have for you today, stay connected!”

[gale-gentlepenguin]

Do you know why heroes always defeat villains?

Why Good triumphs over evil despite how evil schemes and cheats?

Because It is so easy to do evil. It’s easy to be mean, to be selfish, to be greedy, to be violent. To shout, to hate, to be self absorbed. So naturally only the weakest would succumb to it.

But it is immensely difficult to do good. To be loving, to be kind, to be selfless, to be empathetic. To be patient. So naturally it takes a lot of strength to do good despite all the evil around.

People will cheer for a villain if they think they make a good point, but will hiss and boo at a hero just for making a mistake.

Villains choose the path of least resistance.

Heroes Always choose the right path. The right path is always hard. There are steps easier than others. But to be good is to struggle with the dark nature of the world.

To be a Light in a dark world. That is why the hero is called a beacon.

Of course the hero is hated, there are those that are envious. They wish They could have been stronger, they wish they could bring the change.

It’s not a surprise that many people hate heroes. Because when light shines on you, it shows us what we truly are… and many will not like what they see

But regardless, Darkness will try its best to turn off the light. Evil will try to snuff it out.

But even the smallest lights shine in the darkness. For where Light touches, Darkness cannot dwell.

[beiasluv]

PLS i love u sm can i PLS get a reader patching up jakes wounds PLSSSS i see a lot of these patching up wound tropes for neteyam but none for our beloved jake THANK U HON

patching jake sully up (2009)

a/n: amen to that. respect the original sully, pLEASE / enjoyy 🤍

masterlist

jake, jake sully, being the jake sully he is, you often find him with some type of injury :(

boy always find himself in some sort of trouble, but he can’t help it can’t he?

sometimes it’s just a bruise or a scrape on the knee, sometimes he comes home with a FUCKING blood-soaked wound all over his arms or chest.

sighing to yourself as he walked in every time

“jake, for the love of eywa, please, stop putting yourself in danger”

but you can’t stay mad, can you? he got those puppy eyes, awkward giggling, and scratching his neck like he regretted it. (boy, he better be before you whoop his ass)

so basically it all goes like this…

patting the empty area next to you or sometimes you gotta help him walk over to an empty spot

and boy he is heavy ASF man is 10ft tall and expect you to carry him with ease, he better be joking

next is patching up his wounds. probably 90% of the time keeping him shut his mouth

“ow! y/n! please!” “ouch! please- it hurts”

“you better shut your mouth and think of this before you get yourself in trouble”

but being the loving significant other you are, you still care greatly for him 🥺

his favorite position, if his situation isn’t that bad, is for you to sit in his lap and patch him up

if he is laying on the mattress, he loves when you crouch down towards his face and patch him up. even though if you are patching is legs, he will get whiny for you to face him every now and then.

caressing his cheeks if he gets too whiny, and rubbing his head in your embrace

comforting words all. the. time. boy is a crybaby sometimes “squeeze my leg if it hurts too bad”

jake tries his hardest not the hurt your fragile little leg in his grip, but he left some red marks afterwards ;)

he loves staring at your dimly lit face when you patch him up. how you poke your tongue when you are focused, or how your eyebrows scrunched up together.

“why are you doing that?”

“doing what?”

“you know what you are doing, you are staring,” you slightly poked his head with the grinder.

“ow! what was that for? your face is too precious not to stare at, be grateful,” he fake pouted.

“understandable, mr. sully,” you chuckled as he pressed a peck on your lips. “hey! the medicine didn’t dry yet!”

“who cares? your lips are ten times better than it”

you would mumble a quiet apologize every time he hissed out of pain, even though you acted like you are mad at him

he adores how your breath hitched in your throat every time he twitched because of the pain 🥺 he loves how close your breath becomes when your face is near.

man is just obsessed about how he could press his lips against yours without an extra effort, how you are so close to him made his mind spun a million miles away.

his nose is lingered with your scent and it yearns for more and more. oh how he wish he can get drunk in you forever

man is grinning by himself and giggling like a lover boy

man’s a flirt even though he is on his death bead💀

never leaves afterwards if he doesn’t get his kiss kiss, or what he calls it boo boo 🙄

if his situation is too bad and have to stay the night, you will always be there for him 24/7

and jake will 100% definitely take an advantage of that. asking for cuddles 24/7.

when you have to attend other wounds, he will get so whiny and sad :(

sometimes it gets too emotional for you to see him in a situation like this, you just break down crying while patching him up 😭

jake hates to see you like this, especially when he is the cause to make you cry. he will hold you in his arm while you are crying patching him up.

whispering comfort words while he is the one dying here, but it’s jake, guys, what do we expect 😭

“honey, y/n, love, i am fine, i am breathing, okay? help me feel better, aright? no one does it like you,” he whispered in your ears.

“never! e- ever! get yourself t- this bad, again!” you tried to sobbed out each word.

“can’t promise you that, i’ll get ten times worst than this to protect you”

have a great day/night everyone! take care 🤍

@rosaryos / @bumblinbumblvee / @nyotamalfoy / @fangirl-2610 / @astablacksword / @lokisblueskin

[majesticwren]

here we go. I am not even ashamed. this thing was rattling in my brain and I needed to put it down and I LOVED writing this. perry coming back to aew ruined my life, I am a punk stan for life no matter what that man does but uhm I am also loving what they are doing with the elite end jack so ✨hi✨ hello, I am a reformed woman with a new boo, don't come for me :) enjoy 💕

Trigger Warning/s: smut, hate sex, revenge sex if you squint, unprotected sex (as per usual, don't take this as example, follow your sexed! peeps), they call each other names a lot, swearing, chocking, pleasure play, ofc slaps and scratches jack repeatedly, daddy kink? (not really as such but still included), buckets of angst

Masterlist

He pushed her rudely against the wall, flattening himself against her back. His arms were like tight branches caging her, making it impossible to move and to resist him. Not that she had any wish to do so. Not really. 

Jack pushed a hand through her dark hair, grabbing a handful and pulling, making her bend for him only so he could push his face into her neck. The way he inhaled her scent like he was a bloodthirsty animal, made her shiver. JJ had to bite down on her tongue hard not to melt and whine. She wasn’t ready to give him the satisfaction of knowing just how much she liked it. 

He was a greedy motherfucker though, and was clearly taking it as a challenge. If she wanted to put up a fight, he was ready to take her on. His other hand travelled freely under her skirt, where he pushed his fingers unapologetically between her legs. 

This time, JJ couldn’t hold back a hiss. She hated herself for the way her body easily reacted to him. She rolled her hips on him, arching her back under his hold, welcoming his touch with pure heat. JJ resented the pool of hot desire gathering in her lower abdomen, making it so obvious to them both how much the fight she was pretending to pull was already won. 

She felt his damn smug grin growing on his lips, as he pressed it on her neck. “You want this, don’t you, little one?” 

“Fuck you,” she spitted out, only prompting him to shut her up biting down on her collarbone, immediately suckling on her soft skin, already making her see stars. Again, she found herself thinking how pathetic she was when she had to suffocate the need to whine and beg to have more.

He wasn’t done though, just like he could read her like an open book, Jack followed the column of her neck with his tongue, collarbone to her ear, where he pressed his cocky smile. “No, baby. But I’ll gladly fuck you,”

Deep down, she knew he was only doing it to stick it up to her dad. And she wished she was strong enough not to care. She may have hidden it well, but she hated how her heart broke anytime she remembered how things were. In all the hypocrisy of her behaviour, she resented knowing he was only using her and being fine with it because being with him that way was better than getting nothing at all.

How she wished it could be enough to let her move on and forget about him. 

They had something going on throughout the summer of last year. It was still a new thing and they hadn’t gone public with it, but whatever they had it was real. She had fallen for him. And then it was over just as quickly. 

She fought like hell against the magnetism pulling her towards him. She tried to suppress every emotion connecting her to him for months now, and it worked as soon as she didn’t have to see him. When they were worlds apart, no matter about the drama, no matter about the gossiping, no matter about the tight position she was constantly being put into since her father was fired and she chose to stay in AEW, it was easy. As soon as she was safely tucked in America and he was in Japan, it was ok – she managed to ignore it. But everything fell apart as soon as their paths crossed again.  

JJ only needed to see him once. It was a quick instance through the backstage. Just a glance from across the empty corridor and her entire world fell apart. 

She wanted so desperately to hate him. She wished to cancel from her memory everything they had going on back through last summer. But she couldn’t. She was only a hypocrite. 

And Jack knew exactly how to exploit it.

Jack let go of her hair and wrapped his hand around her throat, making her bend against him almost unnaturally, enough so he could look at her in the eye. His hold was surprisingly tender. Before she could even think to talk back, he started massaging her cunt, easily finding her clit through the thin material of her panties. His egomaniac grin was large and annoying, and so pretty it made it hard for her to stay sane. 

He tutted, shaking his head slowly only for the satisfaction of being patronizing. “Look at you,” the way he was looking at her with his sharp, dark eyes made her want to smack him. “You are such a mess already,” JJ rolled her eyes in the back of her skull, pushing her hands on the wall, desperately clawing at it to find support. “Soaked,” he hissed slowly, letting the letters roll on his tongue. He proved his point by pushing a finger along her slit, gathering her slick on his digits like it was a prize he just won.

She tried with every inch of her strength not to moan, still shivering against and clawing her fingers on the wall, as if she was trying to dig her nails into the plaster.

She was enslaved by the pleasure he was giving her so effortlessly. And it wasn’t enough. Not even remotely. Her body desired so much more, aching for him, responding to him like she did for no other. She couldn’t even hide away from the memory of the connection they once had, it was printed all over her skin, all over her face, all over her heart. The edge between what was good and proper and what was bad and forbidden was easily forgotten now. She needed to have everything he had to give, to be used until he was tired and done with her. And then she was ready to beg for more.

“How disappointed would daddy be to know you are such a little slut for me, uh?” Jack whispered into her ear, fishing for a reaction that JJ didn’t miss to give.

“You are an asshole,” anger fired through her, “I hate you.” 

As soon as she tried to oppose him and fight her way off his hold, she realised she had just fallen deeper into his trap. He was ready to catch her just like a spider watching a bug getting tangled in his web. 

He took her attempt to push him off herself as an invitation to handle her. Jack turned her around so they could face each other but before he could do or say anything else, JJ reacted without thinking clearly, only responding to the situation with the adrenaline shooting through her. She slapped him like she meant it and enjoyed seeing him turn his head, taking the hit.

Jack stood still only a second, and then he was on her once more. He pushed her against the wall and, releasing an angry grunt, he grabbed her wrists and trapped them both with his hand, pushing her arms above her head. 

“I will say this only once, little one,” he began looking down at her. JJ was crossed by a shiver, lost in the moment, distracted by the way his little eyes glimmered and how his lips trembled. He looked dark, handsome and desperate in a way that made her skin crawl. She didn’t respond to him with words but raised her chin, inviting him to continue. “I’ll give you the chance to say no and get away. But you’ll have only now. Tell me to fuck off now. Tell me you hate me now, and I’ll believe you,” for a moment she thought to see a more fragile side of him, hiding behind the sharpness of his gaze. “After, I won’t take seriously any of your attempts to fight me after this moment, understood?” 

She knew exactly what he meant and what he wanted from her. He wanted her consent to do whatever he wanted and to make sure he wasn’t overlooking the fights she might put up. His words were supposed to sound somewhat threatening, and yet JJ found it so hot it made her abdomen tremble.

That was the point of no return. 

She was getting lost in the eyes of a man who was singlehandedly able to ruin her career and her life. Crossing that line meant everything she stood for and all of her integrity was to be destroyed just to be with him one night, everything that would come tomorrow would have been a consequence she would have to face alone. And yet, doing otherwise was out of the question. 

She loved her father. She had fought so hard to defend him from everyone and never once she thought to turn her back on him. He had given her everything and did his best to raise her properly. And she was proud to be his legacy. JJ Punk was a warrior just like he was and she was just as opinionated and inconvenient at times. But she was ready to turn her back on him to follow her silly little heart just because she couldn’t take yet another fight. Not that fight, anyway.

She acknowledged Jack’s wish and remained silent and docile, flattening herself against the wall, waiting, looking right back at him.

“Damn it, baby,” his tone was now a relieved whisper. He dived on her in a second, catching her lips in an impatient, famished kiss. JJ immediately melted against him and released a pleasureful sigh, welcoming his pressing tongue into her mouth with ease. She didn’t even try to fight him. He let go of her wrists only to wrap his hands solidly around her hips, squeezing her into his hold just to feel her. “You are mine now,” he huffed into her mouth. Tasting his breath on her tongue gave her a hot shiver that rippled on her skin and through her body, nesting right into her core.

As soon as her hands were free, JJ pushed them both into his hair, giving in to the craving to feel his soft, wild curls in between her fingers. Loosening his manbun was easy enough and she enjoyed watching his hair pop around him, making him look like a glorious lion. She then followed his jawline, caressing his thick, dark beard with her index, watching him raise his chin for her.

JJ smiled, imitating his smug grin. “I like this new look,” she then pushed up on his chin, making him bend his head and expose his neck only to toy with him. “It makes you look even more despicable.”

He hissed. “As soon as you like it, little one, I don’t care what you think of me.”

“No?” JJ pulled on his chin so he could look at her. “You don’t want to know? Not even a little curious? That’s not like you to mind your own business. My daddy must have taught you how to shut up.”

His nostrils flared. She knew how sore that wound still was, just as much as she knew he couldn’t stand her dad, and she was ready to exploit his spite, again, just to toy with him like a cat with a mouse. He wasn’t the only one able to exploit situations in the room.

“Don’t mistake my compliancy, little one,” he warned her, “I only care to fuck you until I have strength. I plan to make you come until you’ll beg me to stop. And then some more. Until I make you scream my name loud and clear, making you like it so much you’ll crawl back to me for more even despite your stupid daddy wishes.”

JJ’s lips twitched. “Son of a bitch,” his words still had the intended effect on her, making her knees weak “You are disgusting,” she started as her hands slid under his leather jacket, “so full of yourself it's embarrassing.” Her words didn’t match her actions as she pressed her palms on his chest, greedily feeling his muscles under her palms, “I hate you.” Jack nodded and helped her remove his jacket, pressing his lips on hers in a quick kiss. He wasn’t trying to shut her up. He was proving a point. 

“You need a humbling lesson,” she continued as soon as he left her mouth only to follow her jawline. He only replied with a small hum and latched to her neck, sucking hard on her the sensitive skin under her ear. 

JJ rolled her eyes and released a sigh. Instead of fighting him off, she hung on his shoulders, willingly accepting the hickey he seemed determined to mark her with. “The shit you pulled in Chicago was ridiculous,”

“You didn’t like it?” He wondered, pushing her skirt up around her hips. “And yet I put so much attention in the show I put up for you. Chicago certainly did.” He cupped his hands around her ass, squeezing her soft flesh into his palms.

“Bullshit,” JJ spit out, “that’s my city. My father’s city. You do not get to come back all so suddenly and shit all over that on a whim,”

“Hardly a whim, your sweet daddy almost ruined my career.”

“Because you can’t shut up, ever.”

“Thank god,” Jack pulled back to look down at her, a large grin printed on his lips making his dimple pop. “If I did, I wouldn’t be here about to fuck Pepsi Phil’s sweet, little daughter, would I?”

“Shut up.” JJ grabbed the collar of his t-shirt and pulled him into a kiss, deciding to suffocate their bickering because there was no winner in that argument. She was done talking. She was done thinking.

Jack pulled her off the wall and they both stumbled across the room removing various pieces of clothing from each other. JJ let her jeans mini-skirt pool at her feet and then accepted Jack’s impatient hands removing her top. She did the same with him, almost ripping his t-shirt off him only so she could dig her nails into his chest, willingly leaving marks.

He then pushed her down on the mattress, proudly standing by the edge of the bed, fiddling with his belt, looking down at her. He looked so pretty it was hard for her to remain sane. But, after all, what did she need sanity for when she had just betrayed every drop of her integrity?

She stretched underneath his gaze, letting him feast on her naked skin, basking in the hunger that consumed his dark eyes. “Fuck, baby, you are just as beautiful as I remembered.”

“I bet you spent all your time thinking about me,” she teased him pulling a presumptuous smile.

“You don’t know the end of it, little one,” he began. The way his gaze softened, looking at her like she was a precious thing he had lost and just found, both surprised and terrified her.

“Shut up,” she quickly barked back, not willing to accept his sweetness. That was an entirely different level of temptation she just couldn’t take on. Opening that door would have only dragged her down deeper into the waters she was already drowning into. “You should put that mouth to better use, scapegoat.” 

Any trace of softness he may have had looking at her was gone in an instant. His features hardened and his gaze darkened as he looked at her like she was his prey. 

He leaned on her and gently pulled her underwear off, hinting to her to raise her hips for him. She damned his soft, attentive touch. And more than that, she damned herself for finding it so exhilarating.

“Open those pretty legs for me, little one,” he hinted tapping on her knee, “let me see how much you want me.” She wished not to be so lost under his spell, but there was nothing she could do. JJ did as he asked, fighting against the slight awkward shyness of knowing to be completely naked underneath his attentive dark gaze. 

“Such a desperate, lost, little girl,” he continued, standing above her.

The cold air that hit her hot, soaked core gave her a shiver, making her hiss. She felt exposed and harmless under his dreadful look and yet didn’t have the strength to fight against his wish. He wanted her so bad his greed was clear on his face. 

Jack licked his lips looking at her without shame. “Such a pretty pussy,” he cooed slowly getting on his knees. “Now, let me taste it. You want it, don’t you?”

JJ knew what he wanted and didn’t give him the satisfaction. She broke eye contact and rolled her head to the other side, facing away. That only seemed to amuse him as a soft chuckle vibrated through his chest. “Don’t be rude with me, baby. I’ll make you regret it,” his words were a soft threat. He pulled her closer to the edge of the bed by her ankles and then, still dissatisfied, he didn’t let go of her. His hands hooked around her right leg, softly pulling it closer to his face, just so he could kiss her ankle, brushing his lips across her joint. “You know I will,” he continued, rubbing his nose on her calf following her leg up and pressing his lips just above her knee and then again on the inside of her thigh. His beard tickled her sensitive skin, making her twitch.

JJ grabbed the sheets, biting down on her lower lip and deciding to be stubborn. 

“You should be nice to me and I’ll be nice right back at ya,” he followed her other leg with a hand, his touch barely there, just enough to make her crave it and not enough to let her feel it. “But if you continue this way, I’ll make you beg me until you cry,” as he kept nuzzling his face on the inside of her thigh, JJ was crossed by a shiver that shook her deeply, making her hips buck up even before she could think to control herself. 

Jack pressed his grin into her sensitive skin, hovering so close to her centre and yet, not enough, tracing back along her leg, torturing her. “Look at you, baby,” he cooed, “I could have you begging in a second, right? You know it too, I can tell.”

JJ was crossed by another shiver, fighting against everything not to look at him. It was a game of principles now. A challenge. She knew he was getting more and more impatient with every second she made him wait for it, and she may have had to pay for it later, but she liked the idea of annoying him. She wanted to slip under his skin just as much as he did with her.

“Don’t be this way,” he still cooed, this time, as his lips crossed the inside of her thigh, he bit down on her soft skin first branding her with a bitemark and then he latched to it, sucking hard on her only to leave another red mark on her skin. JJ couldn’t contain a whimper, as her hands automatically travelled to his hair. When she bucked her hips up again, desperately trying to find release, Jack guided her to throw her legs around his wide shoulders and wrapped his arms around her waist. 

“I do not need your words to know you need me so much,” he huffed raising his head to look at her. “It’s so clear, you aren’t hiding anything from me, little one.”

“Then why do you need me to say it?” She wondered between gritted teeth, finally looking down at him. 

Jack’s grin was infuriating. “Because I wanna hear it,”

“Fuck,” JJ let her head fall backwards, only feeling his hot breath crossing her most sensitive skin was making her lose her mind. 

“Just say it, baby,” he lulled as his palms opened on her abdomen, caressing her belly. “Say it for me, no one else needs to know, just me.”

His voice was tempting and inebriating. Feeling his touch and his breath on her skin was enough to condemn her. JJ hated herself, she wished to have more integrity than that. Maybe some more control. She was convinced her pride would have lasted longer, instead of crumbling right in front of her to his first demand. She was so pathetic she thought she deserved it. 

She bucked her hips up, hissing avidly and then she gave up, nodding. “Fine. I do. I want it. You. I want you,” she couldn’t even think straight anymore. She looked away, trying to hide how confessing that made her blush. “And now shut up,”

“Oh, I’ll shut up,” a low, satisfied chuckle grew from his chest and rolled over her, giving her a shiver as she felt him positioning himself. “Look at me, JJ,” she obeyed even before she realised what his words meant. Jack whipped out a sharp grin, looking up at her from in between her legs. God, he looked so pretty and wild. No one needed to know how weak she was for him. His dark eyes glimmered like the ones of a feral animal. “Don’t take those pretty eyes off me, I want you to watch the way I’m gonna eat you out, a’right?” 

She had no strength to nod but kept her eyes on him and watched the way he fixed her legs around his shoulders. Jack’s smile didn’t disappear. “Use your words, little one, tell me you understand that if you look away, I will stop.”

“Yes, I understand,” she huffed impatiently, feeling her body stretch and tense under an invisible force pressing on her. “Jack, please,”

He gave her exactly what she asked for. Exactly what she needed the second he heard her whisper his name. He leaned in on her and pressed his cocky grin on her cunt. As soon as she felt his mouth on her, JJ’s mind dissolved completely. She melted away in a stream of pleasure that spread across her like warm honey. 

Everything else disappeared. All the time, all the things that had happened, nothing mattered but being close to him right now. And JJ found it freeing, like a boulder had rolled off her chest.

Like he was starved, Jack sucked and licked avidly on her tender, hot flesh, cleaning up her slick and demanding more. His hands were solidly wrapped around her hip and thigh, but not to cage her. If anything, he was guiding her to buck her hip and fuck his face. His dark eyes never let go of hers as he eagerly watched the pleasure shaping her face, welcoming her soft moans like music. 

Quickly, pleasure started to gather in her stomach, heavily pressing down on her making it hard to breathe. As her body stretched like a rubber band, JJ found it impossible to control herself and forgot about her stipulation with Jack, letting her head fall backwards.

He immediately lifted his face up, not willing to show mercy. “What is it, little one?” 

A shiver crossed her as cold air hit her, making her hiss like a snake. The sudden interruption made her go feral as she looked down at him, exposing her teeth like a rabid dog. It didn’t last long though, she quickly melted into submission as soon as she noticed the way he was studying her. He ate her up with his gaze. His cheeks were blushed and his beard covered in her slick, making her chest rumble with pride.  “Please, don’t stop,” she begged softly.

He shook his head, pressing a kiss into her inner thigh, squeezing her soft flesh with his fingers. “Then look at me,” his beard tickled her, giving her a shiver that made her head roll back once more. 

“I am sorry,” she explained trying to find some lucidity, “It’s only your fault.”

Jack chuckled, genuinely amused. “You are close, aren’t you?”

“Fuck yes, I am,” she caught her breath, “please, I won’t look away. I promise.”

Since her words were followed by her locking eyes with him, again Jack was ready to reward her. “Good,” he lowered himself on her, “I wanna watch you come on my face,” he mumbled latching on her clit, sucking her flesh into his hot mouth. No mercy showed. His hot breath and tickling beard first and then his mouth left her breathless. 

This time, JJ fought against the need to let herself go completely and looked at him, not letting his gaze go. If he wanted to watch her, she would have given him a show. She pushed her hands into his hair, tugging at his curls as pleasure quickly mounted inside of her, wilder than before. 

There was something eternally damning her soul about the way she loved to see the pale skin of her thighs contrasting with the golden tone of his shoulders. The satisfaction of having his face pressed between her legs was intoxicating, just like the idea of how beautiful he was, with his big loose hair falling softly on her skin. It wasn’t only that, it was also in the way he held her and how his fingers dug into her flesh, making her wish he left marks. It was in those dark eyes she wished to drown into.

She wished she wasn’t that weak – but she was discovering to be an entirely different person from what she always believed. And she wasn’t proud of it. But she couldn’t stop.

Following the rhythm of her hips and the quickness of her breath, Jack read her body language confidently and traced two fingers to her slit, pushing in only one at first and then both. JJ welcomed his digit with a whimper, biting down on her lower lip. 

“Fuck, you are so tight, baby,” he grunted proudly against her sensitive flesh, not losing any more time and fucking her with his fingers and mouth following an incessant rhythm until she came undone against his face.

JJ cried her pleasure out loud, digging her fingers into his hair and pulling at it, only encouraging Jack to continue, guiding her through her highest and right into overstimulation, ignoring the way her body was shaking and trembling. This time, when she tried to escape him, Jack pushed down on her hips, immobilizing her under his torture.

“Shit,” she huffed pulling his hair, “Jack,” whimpering his name only got him to grunt into her cunt pumping his fingers in and out of her relentlessly. “Stop,” her voice was shaken and weak, just like her attempt to get him off. And the longer it took, the more pleasure started to grow inside of her again, and the harder it was for her to remain sane. This time it felt more erratic and violent. She had the irrational fear she wouldn’t survive this new wave hitting her. JJ had to press her feet into his shoulders to get him off her and, even then, he didn’t seem at all willing to follow her wish. His gaze was completely lost in his selfish desire. 

Jack rudely wiped her slick off his face as best he could and then climbed across her, still fucking her with his fingers. His thumb took the place of his mouth as he massaged circles on her clit. 

“Give me another, little one, I know you have it in you.” He pushed her under him on the mattress avidly watching the way she bent and stretched for him, all consumed by the pleasure he was giving her.

JJ had nowhere to run and there was nothing she could do and, even though she wasn’t going to be grateful, part of her was loving it. She had the tools to make him stop. She knew she only needed to look away, and yet she couldn’t. Not anymore.

She came again and this time it was her the one riding her own pleasure on his fingers. 

“Yes, baby,” he cooed, “such a good girl. So hot for me, uh?” He kept praising her in words that got easily lost in between the waves of pleasure he just gave her.

She dug her nails into his shoulders scratching him some more as she pulled him down on her, suffocating her louder moans into a famished kiss. Tasting her own flavour in his mouth made her tremble, making her wish to mark him more, in every way possible. He was hers. 

This time Jack helped her ride her highs allowing her to come off it, slowly easing her. However, as soon as he was done, his hand traced her leg, guiding her to hook it around his waist as he pressed his hips impatiently against her, ignoring how uncomfortable the rough material of his jeans could feel for her. A small whimper left his chest as he rubbed himself against her.

JJ’s mood changed quickly. She surely wasn’t done with him but he didn’t need to know the extent of how desperately she needed him. Not just yet. His ego was already massive and she had just fed him enough to let him think he had won her over.

Pushing him off her, she dug her nails into his chest, scratching him with the intent of leaving a mark. Jack grunted and, as he tried to catch her hands to stop her, JJ slapped him once more only to feed on his annoyance. She laughed in his face as Jack grabbed her wrists and pinned them above her head, pushing her underneath him.

“This little kitty needs her nails trimmed, uh?” His grin was quick to pop back on his lips. He used it like a weapon, knowing it was annoying her.

“Fuck you,” she hissed, only playing to fight his hold. The rest of her body spoke louder as she bent her legs around Jack’s sides and stretched underneath him. 

“What are you trying to prove?” He looked into her eyes, “That you don’t like me?” His hold on her wrists came loose as he pressed his open hand across hers, “that you despise me?” He crossed his fingers with hers and JJ found herself holding onto him like a lifeline. She held her breath, hanging from his lips. “That you hate the way I make you feel?”

“Yes. All of the above,” she hissed at him, raising her head closer to his. 

Jack’s lips hovered across her mouth. “Sorry,” he began, brushing his lips against hers, making her taste their kiss, “If I could be someone else, I’d give that to you. But you gotta settle for what I’ve got instead.”

There was an underline of disappointment in his words. Something sounded off as if he was genuinely hurt by her. And it tore her heart into pieces. 

Their game was supposed to be that they hated each other and were about to have some good angry sex and forget about it right after. When did he decide to change the game? 

She could deal with the shame of having sex with him. It was easier to accept. Everyone had needs, after all, right? But JJ couldn’t deal with the idea of still having strong feelings for him. How could she look at herself in the mirror knowing that deep down the only thing she wanted to do was to cancel out everything she had said just to pull him to her chest and cradle him softly, whispering to his ear that everything was ok.

Fucking pathetic. Especially since she was convinced it was still a stupid game to him. He was proving a point to her and to her father.

“Just don’t make me look at your face again,” she hissed letting her head fall backwards, distancing herself from his lips. “I can’t stand you.”

She hoped her words would hurt him. Part of her wanted to hurt him just to reflect the way she was hurting. Pretending to be a cold, selfish bitch was easier than having to deal with being aware of how deeply she was betraying her own pride and her father.

Jack nodded, granting her wish. The calm sadness in his eyes came and went in a second. One moment he accepted defeat and the second he was back being feral. His eyes burned with a new desire for conquering. “Don’t worry, little one,” He pulled her and turned her over on her belly like she was a lifeless doll, pressing her down on the mattress, not caring for her comfort. “You won’t have to look at me for long,”

Jack wrapped his hands around her waist and, again, squeezed her in between his palms only to feel her body. He then prompted her hips up for him, pushing a hand across her lower back, making her bend for him. “Good girl,” he still praised softly as she moulded underneath his touch. “Let me see that ass.” His words were followed by a slap. And then another. He hit her harder the second time, enjoying seeing her flinch. Her soft gasp encouraged him to then massage her tender flesh, squeezing her ass into his palm. “You still like it, don’t you?”

JJ was already grasping at the bedsheets, keeping her chest pressed down on the mattress just like he wanted her. “Yes,” she sighed softly, bending her back even more for him as her lower abdomen grew heavier with expectation. The cool air hitting her most sensitive, exposed skin was torturous, bringing her to bite her lower lip not to pathetically whine. 

“That’s my girl,” he cooed softly. He leaned in above her kissing her back. JJ shivered feeling his lips tracing her spine. She may not wanted it, she may not liked it, but it felt so intimate and so right she was ready to give everything up for him. 

She already did.

She heard the jingling noise of his belt coming undone and shivered when she realised what was coming as he took off the last clothes that were left.

Jack grabbed a handful of her hair, pulling her up just so he could press his face by her ear. “I’m gonna fuck you now, is that ok?”

“As soon as you do it hard,” she teased popping her ass back, pressing herself against him. A satisfied smile crossed her lips as she felt his heavy shaft pressing against her hip.

He hissed against her shoulder and then pulled back so suddenly she found herself missing the feeling of his hot skin on hers. He gently pressed a hand in between her shoulders and guided her to press her chest back on the mattress. Once he had her positioned like he wanted, he guided himself to her core, holding his hip solidly with his other hand.

They both moaned as he rubbed his cock against her wet folds, letting her have a taste of how hard he was for her. “You are so fucking wet, baby,” he huffed and kept going, coating himself in her juices, teasing her.

“Just for you,” she admitted, hating herself for it a second later.

Jack rewarded her by positioning himself and slowly pushed the tip in, going at torturing her some more. The whimper he released slipped across her, giving her a shiver. It was a pretty sound she had no intention of forgetting. He then proceeded to go all the way, moving still excruciatingly slow, but filling her up and stretching her so deliciously JJ couldn’t contain a victorious smile.

“Yes,” she praised, receiving a pleasureful huff in return. 

Jack squeezed her in between his hands and took longer than a moment to enjoy feeling her underneath him. She felt his dark eyes cruise her body, studying every inch of her tattooed skin.

“Baby, please,” she whined, not entirely sane anymore. She didn’t even care about fighting him anymore. Her pride was forgotten. Now, she only wanted him, nothing else mattered.

“Fuck,” Jack huffed and then grabbed her hair, pulling it to make her lean up so he could press his face in her neck once more. “Call me baby again,”

JJ melted into a smile and bent under him, giving him free access to her neck. “You like that, don’t you?”

At first, Jack replied bucking his hips against her in a quick thrust that hit her suddenly and deeply, leaving her breathless. Then, his hand slid around her throat, squeezing her softly. “Call me baby one more time, little one, and I won’t leave your side ever again,” his lips were so close to her ear that it made it hard for her to remain focused.

It was supposed to be a threat. Part of their game maybe. But JJ didn’t find it scary. She didn’t perceive it as yet another confrontation. It was a dangerous declaration that left the ball in her court. And she had already decided she was going for eternal damnation.

“Baby,” She purred, stretching against him. It was the sex. She wasn’t thinking clearly. 

A soft grunt shook his chest as he finally gave in and started moving his hips, starting to fuck her just like she demanded. He slipped in and out of her with ease, quickly finding his rhythm, and JJ was ready to take him on. The way he moved inside of her, hitting the right spot every time, made her thoughts fog up. She was pure emotion now, burning only for him. 

Jack’s hand stretched around her jaw, pushing her head to turn, making her bend underneath him, enough so he could have access to her lips and steal a kiss. She was ready to match his hunger, devouring his lips. JJ suffocated her moans into his mouth, only prompting him to squeeze her more solidly underneath him as the rhythm of his thrusts quickened.

“Call me daddy,” 

“You are disgusting,” she huffed, deciding to try and resist him, only for the pleasure of contradicting him. Only to fight him some more, just enough not to give him the satisfaction right away. She craved his reaction. She craved the fight.

He chuckled into her ear. In response, he grabbed her throat in his palm, “C’mon, little one, do it for me,” the way he was begging her made him both so pathetic and so hot JJ couldn’t take it.

“And let your ego grow some more?” A sharp smile grew on her lips, “No, sir.”

Jack’s hold on her throat became harder. He squeezed the breath out of her, pushing his face into her neck. His thrusts were incessant, taking her breaths and linear thoughts away. “JJ,” he sounded like he was begging at first, “I’ll make you regret it if you don’t,” she felt his grin pressed on her jaw, “you know I will.”

“Fuck you,” she wheezed, keeping her fight up.

Jack wasn’t done either. His hand moved from her throat to grabbing a handful of her hair as he pushed her down on the mattress rudely. His other hand was firmly grabbing her hip, guiding her to bounce off him following his frenzied rhythm as he proceeded to fuck her even harder. From that angle, JJ felt his cock so deep inside of her that she felt its hits shake her stomach. She pressed her face into the mattress, suffocating the loud moans he ripped out of her.

It was supposed to be torturous; he was using pleasure to make her pay, but it wasn’t making her want to give in even an inch.

“C’mon, baby,” he was back begging. His hand moved from around her hip all the way across her abdomen and in between her legs where he started to massage her clit skilfully. “Give it to me once. I want to hear the pleasure I’m giving you bend your voice.”

JJ hissed. She couldn’t think clearly, pleasure had completely taken over her. Part of her registered his words and knew exactly what kind of twisted, dirty bastard he was being, but she would have lied if she said she cared enough to actually find offence in it or consider it crossing the line.

She pushed herself up, finding him ready to catch her and help her move. He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her to his chest, finding his rightful place into her neck socket, as JJ pushed an arm back, grabbing on his hair, he suckled on her skin, only enhancing her pleasure. His small whimpers didn’t help.

“You are sick,” she spit out. It was supposed to be an offence but the way her voice bent under a moan gave it a different vibe.

Jack nodded against her. “Yes, baby. Just for you. You drive me insane.”

“Not me,” she huffed, “you are fighting a war against my father,”

“Yes. I am. But he isn’t here. It’s you and me now.”

“Fuck,” JJ rolled her eyes, letting a wave of pleasure take over her body, wiping away her thoughts entirely. She didn’t know the extent of the consequences of what he just said. He had such a way with words, knowing what to say to make her do what he wanted. She couldn’t trust him. And yet she was ready to sing for him. She didn’t want to think about how much her heart was sealing around the feeling she had tried so desperately to forget. 

“C’mon, babygirl,” he lulled softly, his soft voice brushed on her ear, making her go insane.

Pleasure-bent words started forming and common sense escaped her mind. JJ clenched her jaw, trying to fight the desire to give him anything he wanted, but she was too high and too lost in her pleasure to keep it up for longer than a moment. 

She let go of the act as soon as another powerful wave of pleasure shook her body and senses. 

“D-daddy,” she whined, scared to say at first. Then, immediately finding the way he approved of it with a deep moan so rewarding. “Fuck me, daddy,” 

Jack pressed a gloating smile into her shoulder and gave her exactly what she craved.

Her pleasure was growing fast, mounting inside of her with such violence JJ had absolutely no control over herself.

“Hold on,” she huffed unsure how she managed to put words together. “J-Jack?” she wrapped a hand on his wrist, both trying to find something to hang on and to get his attention.

He was ready to catch her. “Tell me, little one,”

“I need-” her words were broken by a whimper as he didn’t miss a hit on her already shaking body. “Oh, fuck,” she hissed, digging her nails into his skin, “I need to look at you.” She continued, gathering all her strength to produce sensed words. “Let me look at you, baby,”

Jack seemed surprised by her words just as much as she was. She was aware she had just contradicted what she had ordered him earlier, but they both seemed not to care about any of it anymore. 

He obliged her wish and helped her turn around and climb on his figure. JJ straddled him and, hanging on his shoulders, she slid back on his cock, welcoming him with a sigh. A content smile appeared on her lips as she looked straight into his dark eyes. There was nowhere to hide anymore.

She kissed his cheeks, the tip of his nose, and then again, his lips, as Jack closed his strong arms around her figure, guiding her to ride him to the rhythm he had decided, fucking her quick and hard, burying himself deep inside of her every time, just like she had asked. 

With every hit, she was pushed closer and closer to her edge, to the point she found herself hovering over insanity, completely lost in the pleasure he was giving her, making her feel like she was drunk.

JJ pushed her hands into his hair, bringing him to bend his head just so she could have the impression of towering over him, diving into his eyes full of lust. “Don’t hold back,” she warned with an encouraging nod.

He didn’t. He gave her exactly what she asked for, exactly what she needed. As soon as he felt her stretch against him, gasping for air, Jack pulled one of his smug grins looking proudly as pleasure morphed her face. “Come for me, little one,” he cooed softly, ready to hold her tight the second she was hit by her orgasm. 

She called for his name as pleasure washed over her, leaving her breathless and senseless. But Jack had no mercy for her and didn’t allow her to have a moment to breathe. She fucked her right over her edge and kept going, selfishly chasing his own peak.

When he started to reach his own edge, his fingers dug into her skin, making her bounce on him relentlessly, Jack nuzzled his face into her neck socket, suffocating his softer pleasureful whimpers against her throat. His voice vibrated through her, making her lose her mind. 

JJ was nothing but welcoming. This time she was the one holding him and when his strength started to weaken, she took over riding him and pushing him over his edge, avidly taking everything he had to give, milking every drop of his pleasure.

When the waves of their pleasure calmed down and the fog dissipated, they still held on to each other, catching their breaths. Jack softly brushed his lips on her neck praising her as his hands cruised on her back all the while JJ pressed soft kisses on his forehead. 

Jack laid her down on the mattress, tenderly assuring she had a pillow under her head and then rolled on her side. They were both still shaken and clearly not done with each other, but she was grateful to take a break.

“Good?” He wondered looking back up at her. For once, his egotistical self was gone, leaving space for a sweeter version looking to be reassured.

JJ smiled, nodding, still catching her breath. “So good,” her mind still felt hazed, to the point she purred and melted into a smile under his eyes, without thinking about the consequences. “I need a tall glass of water, though.”

“I’ll take care of you,” he pulled a sweet, sharp smile and winked flirtatiously, making her mind go completely blank and her heart pitter-patter in her chest. Damn him. “I just need to ask you something first,” he wondered as he toyed with her hand, looking at the way their fingers crossed. She suspected it was a way not to face her.

“Shoot,” 

“Did you mean it?”

“What?”

“That you hate me.”

JJ huffed, feeling suddenly so uncomfortable she couldn’t sit still. Her eyes shot to the ceiling as she retracted her hand from his hold, feeling fear slither under her skin. 

There was no harder question to be asked.

She did. And she didn’t. 

She resented him because she considered him the reason why her heart was broken. And she resented herself because, despite everything, she couldn’t stick to her own anger. She was angry all the time; at herself, at her father, at the world, and at fate or God, even. But now she didn’t feel powered by that same fire that allowed her to continue going, now she felt pathetic.

“Why are you so committed to humiliating me?” She wondered with a tired sigh. She knew she was about to lose that war. “Have I not given you enough already? Can you not just accept me being here with you as assurance enough to feed your ego?”

“Is that what you think this is?” He sounded heartbroken. Jack cupped her face softly, making her look at him even when she didn’t feel like she had the strength to face him. “You think I’d be that cruel, little one?”

“Yes,” JJ looked into his eyes and got lost in the man she met, surprised to find him willing to show his more vulnerable side. This wasn’t the Jack she had learned to despise over the last few months. This wasn’t the smug motherfucker willing to burn the world down to get his revenge. This was the man she left months ago, as they broke off things without a word. One moment they were together, enjoying the idea of everything that could have been, and the next they were strangers.

God, his eyes. JJ was burning underneath his dark gaze. Jack had such sweet eyes, hiding perfectly all the emotions that laid underneath. They were the most beautiful, most dangerous eyes one could have. 

“I think you want to win me like a prize,” She continued, knowing her words would hurt him. This time, she didn’t like it. “I think you wouldn’t mind me if I wasn’t JJ Punk. Can you blame me?”

“You are dead wrong if that’s what you think,” he caressed her cheeks, “I hate your father’s guts and yes, this,” he pointed between them, underlining their connection, “it is done in spite of him. But baby, hell if I’ll let him take the merit of the ways I’ve missed you.” Jack still hung on her before she could look away, trying to find something to say. “These past few months have been the hardest of my life,” he continued, hooked into her gaze, “I had to rethink everything about myself. And I had to do it alone. I thought I was done. I thought this dream of mine was finished. I have lost people left and right. For a time, I thought I was left completely alone. Everything changed for me. I sometimes can hardly recognise myself in the mirror. But I am who I need to be, now. I am who I was made to be,”

“I,” JJ took a small pause to breathe, finding it hard under his gaze and the weight of his words washing over her, “I understand that,” 

“I am not finished,” he corrected her, “In all of this, I had only one constant to grasp. Only one thing didn’t change, and that was you. The way I felt about you. And I grasped to it. It kept me sane. It kept me close to who I used to be, even if I can’t be that man anymore.”

“Jack,” JJ gasped, suddenly terrified by his words, feeling a knot sealing her stomach. She tapped her fingers on his lips, trying weakly to shut him up, but he didn’t let her. 

“I need you, JJ. I need you here, I need you always.”

“We can’t,” she gasped, her chest was shaking violently. His words and what they made her feel meant so much more than giving up her dignity to have sex. It was different. It was much more serious. Much more complicated. Prohibited. “Jack,” she grabbed his chin, trying to find something to hold onto before she could spiral into absolute panic. “I can’t betray my father.”

“I am not asking you to.”

“Being with you is already a pretty big ask,”

“But never once I dared to ask you to change your opinion about me or your father, did I?” He looked into her eyes, “I’d never do that. I just need you. We can keep it a secret forever, I don’t care.”

She wanted to believe his words. She wanted to get lost in him and forget about everything else. Her heart was still aching for him and now, more than ever, she felt it skip out of her chest and dive into his to find anything to latch on and keep the illusion of what they were sharing alive. 

But she couldn’t let herself get lost in that feeling. He was going to stab her in the back, she could feel it.

Yet, instead of putting her fears into thoughts and sensed words, JJ silenced them both, pulling him into a kiss. She had sold her soul that night, she just knew it. Nothing would have made sense ever again, she was the first betrayer. And she was ok with that. Sex had consumed every drop of her anger, leaving her exposed and defeated, hostage of all the feelings she never took the time to heal.

“I don’t hate you,” she then confessed against his lips, kissing him softly. She hated herself for it. As soon as those words came out of her, she regretted it just because she knew that even though she liked to pretend it wasn’t the case, she had just condemned them both. “I can’t love you either,”

“I know,” Jack nuzzled his face into her neck, hiding from the world. “I would never ask that of you.”

Jack rolled on top of her, his hands already finding their way across her skin, their bodies moving attracted to each other by a silent magnetism. 

JJ mirrored his movements and welcomed him, ready to bury all those feelings somewhere deep, hoping not to find them ever again. But she wasn’t quite ready to let go of him. She wondered if she would ever be. And she had her answer even before she could form the thought, as her arms branched tight around his shoulders. 

Sex was the perfect compromise for them both to let them find each other and pretend to believe whatever made them feel better.

JJ pushed herself up and kissed him. It was a sad kiss. A desperate one. “I can’t trust you,” she whispered on his lips. 

“That’s ok,” He kissed her back, this time deeper, stronger, making her feel it. “You shouldn’t.”

[mightyflamethrower]

HOUSTON, TX — Democrats outside of the Kamala Harris rally began screaming in blind rage after spotting a child who somehow managed to make it out of the womb alive.

"Boo! Die! Die!" cried the Democrats, appalled by the sight of a little child in a stroller. "How did this little parasite escape the forceps and skull crusher? Hiss!!"

According to eyewitnesses, the young child was sitting in her stroller quietly, prompting the Democrats present to begin foaming at the mouth. "It's just sickening to see a little child that is alive," said rally attendee Sharon Marks. "It fills my heart with such abject fury, I just want to get in her little rosy face and scream every obscenity I can think of. What kind of hell are we living in where there are living children sitting around in strollers?"

At publishing time, the Democrats had calmed down after expressing their rage in ritualistic screams and were comforted by the sight on the stage of several people in white coats dedicated to killing every child in sig

TWO MINUTES OF HATE

[lantanasmuttyfanfics]

Heyyyy… sorry for not updating on Friday or Saturday like I promised

I just had a lot of things going on but you can expect my regular posting (hopefully) again

Anyway this is a Monster High fic with my fav couple Cleo and Deuce!!

Hope you enjoy!!

——————————

Deuce fucking hated all these gala events and fancy parties that Cleo would invite him to. But for her and to see her happy he’d attend every single one.

So here they were now in some gala Cleo’s fathers was hosting in Boo York, he was dressed in a rather elaborate suit made by some famous Scaris designer.

Cleo was clinging onto his arm as they walked towards some delegates, she had a smile plastered on her face and he was trying to match hers.

“Good evening ms De Nile. This is?” Cleo looked up at Deuce her eyes fluttering my “my manster. Deuce Gorgan.”

He gave a slight wave as Cleo leaned her head against his arm. “Umm… pleasure.” The delegates looked him up and down not giving him an other ounce of attention before they turned back to Cleo.

“Anyway… I told the minister-.” One of the delegates started to talk but Deuce zoned out, turning to look around.

In the far corner he found Frankie and Clawdeen sipping some drinks that were being served. Noticing that he was staring Frankie waved him over.

He wanted to excuse himself but he couldn’t bring it in him to leave Cleo to fend for herself with these boring monsters.

As the clocked ticked on and the delegates continued to drone on and on, Deuce felt his snakes start to get agitated, their hissing and snapping more than enough of an indication.

Seeing this Deuce tried to calm the down by offering some punch he got from the passing by waiter but they hissed even louder.

“Deuce? Deuce are you ok.” He turned at the sound of Cleo’s enchanting voice, she stared up at him with those siren eyes of hers and Deuce nearly forgot about the problem at hand.

“My snakes are getting agitated.” Cleo nodded giving him a small squeeze on the arm before turning to look at the monsters in front of her.

“If you’ll excuse us I believe my… sister is calling us.” Without an other word Cleo pivoted on her heels, her hair whipping behind her in the process.

Once they were far enough from the delegates, Cleo let out a sigh her head falling on his shoulder as she gazed at him and his snakes.

“My precious babies. Always saving the day.” He gave her an exasperated look as she petted the head and cooed at one of his snakes.

“Seriously though I think that I would have died from boredom. Or at least died twice.” Deuce chuckled, giving her a kiss on the cheek.

“Tell me about it. Can’t wait till we leave. No offense of course!” Cleo rolled her eyes, slightly elbowing him in the ribs. “Don’t worry you’re valid in that.”

He was about to reply when a hiss from his snakes rang about. Cleo turned to look up at them her hand gently caressing as many as her fingers would allow.

“Are they upset about something.” Deuce shrugged letting out a sigh. “I don’t know baby. They’ve been on and off like this the entire night.”

Cleo tutted her head lulling to the side “maybe they’re sick?” Deuce shook his head, grabbing a bone sandwich from a tray.

“They don’t get sick unless I’m sick.” He offered the sandwich to them and they shredded it up hungrily.

They stood there in comfortable silence for a few moments, Cleo leaning against his chest and his arms wrapped around her waist.

As the stood swaying softly to the music, Cleo suddenly stood straight her eyes looking at Deuce in surprise.

Deuce who had also felt it gave her a sheepish look. “Sorry baby. You were kinda rubbing up against me.” Cleo raised her brow.

“You got hard because of a little rubbing?” Deuce smirked his eyes racking over his ghoul friend in lust. “How could I not when she looks like… like a fucking wet dream.”

Cleo felt her body heat up at his words, deciding to tease him a bit she pushed back against him pretending to fiddle with her dress as she rubbed and pushed against his growing hard on.

Deuce cursed under his breath, his hand quickly grabbing Cleo’s hips as she shoved against him particularly hardly.

Letting out a hard breath Deuce tried to think and ignore his ghoul friends ministrations, but as she turned to look at him from over shoulder that wave of lust coursed through his body.

“What’s the problem Deucy?” She fluttered her eyes in a fake innocent type way as Frankie and the others approached.

“Yeah what’s up with you.” Deuce gulped hoping his voice was clear before he answered Frankie. “Nothing. Just a bit hot in here.”

Catching on Clawdeen smirked at Cleo as she grabbed Frankie’s hand to leave, but unfortunately Frankie didn’t catch on.

“Really? I’m an actually pretty chilly and it’s not because Abbey is around.” Feeling Cleo grind against him, Deuce gave Frankie a tight lipped smile.

“Mhmm.” Was his only reply before Clawdeen made some excuse and dragged Frankie away from the pair.

Once they were out of sight Deuce grabbed Cleo’s hips, bringing his mouth down to her neck as he whispered “maybe I should sedate you for that teasing.”

Cleo knew what he meant and she felt a wave of heat course through her, early on in their relationship they had both… figured out that a nip for Deuce would extract some sort of sedative venom.

At that time it had left her so relaxed she could barely move her arm. To say she loved the feeling was an understatement.

“Well… I wouldn’t mind.” Deuce cursed again his head falling in the crook of her neck. He let out a sigh trying to take deep breaths.

“What don’t you say? let’s get out of here, I don’t think I can bare to listen to one more bore drone on and on. And besides I have something fun planned for us.”

He gave her a knowing smirk his hand traveling to her ass as he gave it a slap. Cleo gasped and turned to look at him with that look.

“Then why are we wasting time. Let’s go.” He grabbed Cleo’s hand and positioned her in front of him as he led them to the exit of the hall.

Cleo brought her hand to cover her mouth to hide her smile as they passed her family. “And where do you think you’re going.” Nefera seemed to appear out of nowhere.

Cleo suppressed an eye roll, her head tilting to the side as Deuces snakes hissed on agitation after being interrupted.

“None of your business. Now if you’ll excuse me.” Cleo shoved Nefera out of the way with her shoulder, ignoring her sisters screeches.

Once they made it outside, Cleo signaled down a taxi. Getting inside, Deuce was past the point of caring if anyone was watching them and was kissing her neck.

He was careful not to pierce the skin, not wanting to end the fun before it began. Cleo, although more conscious of her surroundings, was to past the point of caring.

She leaned into his muscular chest and draped her leg over his thigh, making sure to graze his dick as she ‘fixed’ her dress.

Speaking of, Deuce was finding it increasingly hard not to tear the dress off. Wanting nothing more than to feel her silky skin against his hands.

It really had been to long since they last had sex. What was it? 1, 2 days maybe even 12 hours. He didn’t know or care all he wanted was to have her now.

The need and lust he felt was nearly insatiable, the only cute being the feel of his ghoul friends skin against his own. And then again maybe that wasn’t enough.

The car came to a holt and Deuce quickly dragged Cleo out, his mouth attaching to her neck in seconds.

“Slow down Decue.” He ignored her, directing them to the golden doors of the hotel. “Can’t baby. Not when you look and feel so… so hot.”

Cleo felt herself get wet at his words but still peeled herself off. She gave him and his snakes a look when they both hissed.

While it wasn’t common for Deuce to hiss, he did do it when he was frustrated or annoyed. But then again that was usually suppressed by how high he would get.

Pulling him through the lobby, slapping his wondering hands once in a while, they made it into the elevator where he was on her again in seconds.

This time she didn’t stop him as he bombarded her with kisses, she let out a quite moan when he sucked at a particular spot. It was as if her head was spinning as he continued to suck at her neck.

The elevator dinged and the doors opened, seconds later Deuce was leading them out while he wrapped his hand behind Cleo’s thigh and pulled her leg up.

She wrapped her other leg around his waist as well as he now carried them to her bedroom. In the midst of his continues kissing and sucking Cleo could not care less about her ringing icoffin.

She’d deal with whoever it was later, now the only thing was important was to get this dress of off her and have Deuce on top of her.

Stumbling through her bedroom, Deuce kicked the door shut and placed Cleo down on the covers as she continued to have her legs around his waist while he stabilized himself by leaning one leg on the covers.

Cleo moaned as his wondering hands cupped her breast and pushed her down, now that she was laying on her back Deuce got ontop of her completely. His legs straddled her and he teased by softly running his hand up her inner thigh until he grazed her panties.

Gasping against his mouth Cleo returned the favor and played with the zipper of his pants, she slid the zipper down slowly, her nails grazing his dick in the process. Deuce cursed under his breath and jolted against her hand.

The room was almost silent, except the more than lustful hisses of Deuces snakes and their moans. Pulling his shirt of his body, Deuce looked Cleo in the eye as he leaned down and came between her thighs.

He grabbed her smooth legs and put the over his shoulder, kicking her shoes of in the process, as he licked a strip up her leg. Cleo shuddered at the feeling her hands gripping the sheets below, chuckling Deuce scrunched her dress at her hips and started to suck everywhere but the place she most wanted.

This was until she gutted her hips in his face and Deuce gave her a smirk before he looked at her in the eyes and licked her slit. Cleo let out a breathy moan, biting her lip as he continued to suck and lick like his life depended on it.

Cleo felt as if she was going to melt into the sheets from how hot and heavy she was feeling, each time his masterful tongue came into contact with her a new wave of warmth and slick coursing through her.

She let out a surprised moan as his tongue entered her heat, swirling and licking at her tight walls. She felt so over stimulated that she thought that she might explode right here right now, luckily for her the feeling of her orgasim was approaching fast and hard.

Noticing this, Deuce plunged in deeper his snake like tongue reaching places Cleo didn’t think existed. With her euphoria just on the cusp of falling through, Cleo put her hand over mouth too afraid someone could hear them.

Deuce didn’t let that happen as he reached up and grabbed her hand, gripping it tightly by her side. Tipping over the edge Cleo let out a half moan half scream as she felt a blinding heat travel through her. Deuce sucked and licked everything, leaving her to feel like there was nothing left in her.

“Tired already baby? Now Cleo we’ve just gotten started.” She let out a sigh and a small smile, she knew that his sex drive was high as ever and this was only the tip of the iceberg. Not that she’d complain, she just loved how high his sex drive was. He could go on for hours compared to other monsters she’d heard other girls talking about.

Locking her shaking legs around his shoulders, she ran her finger down his chest while smirking. Deuce also smirked and got up, he slowly slid his pants and underwear down until his rock hard dick was standing between them.

Cleo also sat up, she sensually pushed the strap of her dress of, looking directly at his covered eyes as she did. For show, she bit her lip and ran her fingers down her body as she pushed her tight dress down until it sat in a pool at her hips.

She suppressed a smirk as his twitching hands and bulging veins appeared before her. Finally stepping out of her dress, Cleo stood up and threw it across the room as she stood in front of his and trailed her hands up and down his body.

Deuces hands came to her hips and he walked her backwards towards the bed as he placed kisses on her neck and top of her breasts. As Cleo’s legs hit the bed, she latched her lips on to Deuce and let their tongues fight in a battle for dominance.

To win, Decue brought a finger at her still aching slit making her gasp in surprise and lose their little battle. Not that she had much of a complaint, she loved when he took control.

After a couple of minutes of continues sucking and kissing Deuce pulled apart first and turned Cleo around as he bent her over. Cleo’s eyes widened in surprise as she reached to grab onto the headboard with her ass now up in the air.

She felt Deuces heat consume her as he settled behind her, his muscular arms gripping her hips tightly. “Ready baby?” She nodded to far gone in her lust to full care for anything else as she felt his thick dick slowly penetrate her entrance.

Letting out a sigh, she gripped the headboard tightly as Deuce himself wrapped a hand around her neck as he gritted his teeth in self control. They were both panting by the time Deuce bottomed out, in his attempt for self restraint he bit his lip with his fang, just enough to hurt but not penetrate.

Once Cleo gave him the ok, he pulled nearly out before slamming back in, continued again and again his free hand messing with Cleo’s breast as she gripped the headboard tightly. Their moans and grunts mixed with the sound of the headboard banging against the wall rang around and room and neither of them had it in them to care about anyone hearing.

Feeling her climax quickly approaching, Cleo reached back and grabbed Deuce by the back of the neck. She brought him forward and smashed their lips together in a kiss of passion, lust and love. As Deuce was leaned forward in her reach Cleo decide to tease him.

She ran her fingers down the scales of his arms and he immediately responded by grunting and thrusting harshly against her. “Baby… you know… that’s sensitive.” Cleo did it again and heard his snakes hiss in delight.

“Do I?” She whispered out against his lips as he cursed under his breath. He didn’t know why but his scales had always been a very sensitive part of his body, so sensitive that one time when Cleo had accidentally brushed up against him and touched his scales he had a boner for a full hour.

And now she was using it against him and as Cleo touched his scales again he felt his climax quickly approaching. He tried to hold out for just a few seconds as Cleo suddenly came with a breathy moan, her head fallling back against his shoulder.

As Decue himself fell into a state of euphoria he leaned down without thinking and bit down against Cleo’s neck and shoulder. She gasped in surprise and slight pain as she felt her body start to go numb at the venom traveling through her.

Her arms first gave out and she was glad Deuce was holding onto her, then her legs started to give out. At that point Deuce realized what he had done and cursed loudly as he pulled her against his chest, “baby I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to bite you.” He let out a sigh as she saw her eyes dropping closed.

With her last strength, Cleo gave him a soft kiss on the cheek and whispered “it’s ok. Just be there when I wake up.” Her eyes dropped closed and her body went limp against him, sighing he untucked the covers and put Cleo under the heaps on blankets.

As he went to tuck her back in one of his snakes leaned down and gave Cleo a slipper snake kiss on her forehead. Deuce chuckled and petted the snakes head, he was glad that his snakes seemed to be in love with Cleo as much as he was. Because at the end of the day she was the ghoul he wanted to marry.

And marriage would be quite difficult if his snakes didn’t like Cleo, like how they seemed to hate Rochelle. Getting in bed next to her he wrapped his arms around her waist and moved some hair out of her face as he buried his own against the crook of her neck.

But as he felt himself slowly falling asleep, he took of his glasses and placed them on the nightstand. He blinked a couple of times before he rubbed his eyes in tiredness and laid back down and cuddled against Cleo.

He fell asleep with a content feeling in his chest. He was here with the ghoul he wanted to marry and nothing was more perfect.

——————————-

This is my first time writing about MH but I hope you enjoyed regardless!!

You can send me commissions for other MH characters or other fandoms pairings that you guys want and I’ll try write them as quickly as possible.

Anyway how do you guys feel about a Valentine x Draculaura fic. I watched ‘why do ghouls fall in love’ the other day and my lordy lord Val is just soooooo 🥵

[lonesomedreamer]

The Rings of Power Liveblog: “Shadow of the Past” (Episode 1)

Two years late, curiosity got the better of me, and I decided I had to see this thing for myself ahead of the second season premiere…spoiler: I didn’t hate it.

I’m not going to gripe about these children looking decidedly human (or at least not Elvish), because I understand the limitations of using, you know—actual human children as actors. But I will question the notion of Elvish children being smug bullies.

But baby Galadriel definitely looks the part.

“It’s not going to float, it’s going to sail.” Not off to a strong start with the dialogue…

Oh, the Elf children are…throwing rocks at her paper boat? All of them? Why?? I know the behavior of Elves in the First and Second Ages tended to be less detached/noble and whatnot, but little Galadriel is literally about to punch this Elf boy…

I have so many questions about this hairstyle choice.

“We have no word for death.” Somehow, I doubt that. This is the Second Age, right? Elves had definitely already experienced death.

Why does this seem like a slightly retooled Minas Tirith design? Is this supposed to be VALINOR??? (Actually, this would be a decent Amber design…)

A very underwhelming depiction of the destruction of the Two Trees…this is what Amazon spent amlost a billion dollars on? I know they can’t accurately depict what happened because, you know, no rights to The Silmarillion, but it still underwhelmed me.

This sequence is just all so obviously CGI. While I’m no fan of the original Jackson films (sorry, I know—boo, hiss), a lot of it looks real.

“See, it’s just like that Game of Thrones spinoff you like, but with terrible CG!”

It would be so helpful if Galadriel’s voiceover told viewers that Orcs were created as a mockery of the Elves, or hinted at why Morgoth created them/why he hated the Elves. Unfortunately, this is what happens when you try to adapt a work to which you don’t have all the rights.

She is very, very pretty.

“What devilry is this?” Is that a word in Middle-earth?

Lots of Galadriel confidently assuming she knows things she can’t possibly know (for the sake of hurrying the story/journey along, I guess)…if only the streaming services didn’t limit themselves to eight or ten episodes and gave their stories room to breathe!

Anyone watching who’s never read The Silmarillion (or even the trilogy): who the fuck is Morgoth? What are the Trees?? What year is it??? What’s going on here??!? Again, the huge problem of adapting a larger story/universe when you only have partial rights…

Insert obligatory video game-esque troll battle that’s also a callback to the Moria scenes of the FOTR film. You can use the bathroom here and miss nothing.

Some proto-Hobbits, because why not? I did like the “hidden village” reveal thing, though!

I kind of love them?

There’s a lot to be said for the charm and appeal of the Shire from an audience perspective, the comfort of it (which is why the Scourging of the Shire is so thematically important and excising it was an irredeemable sin…but I digress), so I actually 100% understand why they included these guys. TTT is by far the bleakest book of the trilogy, my least-favorite, and the lack of the Shire is a huge reason why.

23 years later and I’m still not over the utter miscasting of Hugo Weaving. Visually, this Elrond isn’t really better. Why is Elrond so damn hard to get right??? And his hair is described as black!

The best costumes a billion-dollar budget could buy?

“Elf-lords only.” Such a dignified, Elvish thing to say…

Yes, Elves could be haughty and unkind; just ask Bilbo! But Elrond is an Elf-lord. Hmm.

Also…Elrond and Galadriel appear to be approximately the same age. It doesn’t matter that Galadriel is actually much older (and his eventual mother-in-law!), because TV is such a visual medium.

This is actually a larger overall problem. Because most of The Lord of the Rings takes place over the course of one year, an adaptation doesn’t need to hold the audience’s hand regarding the passage of time. But in this case, as Galadriel’s narration too-briefly mentions, events are taking place across hundreds and even thousands of years. Elves like Galadriel are significantly older than others, like Elrond, but unless you tell the audience that, they won’t know, and the story loses something as a result.

Even though this design is clearly based on Rivendell in the Jackson films, it is quite lovely.

Pretty!!!

How do Galadriel and Elrond know each other? They seem close. Inquiring minds want to know!

The content and context of this scene is meaningless, but I don’t care—it’s just so pretty!

Even though I know they get worse, for now I don’t really mind the proto-Hobbits. They’re obviously not Tolkien, but they’re an homage, and they’re fun/visually appealing.

The casting director gets a D+ for the male Elves. (Then again, they were poorly-cast in the Jackson films too.)

“And as a reward, you will all be exiled!” lmfao. Being shipped off to Valinor doesn’t seem like much of a punishment, though. Where do I volunteer?

Still, it makes sense that Galadriel, who (correctly!) believes Sauron to still be alive and a threat and who wishes to avenge her brother, would be upset about this. They’ve changed her backstory/motivations—which I hate—but her attitude does track with those changes.

Nuns??

This set design is magical, no notes.

Luthien??

She really is perfectly cast.

Elrond, one of the wisest and kindest of all the Elves, is being written as some smug royal enforcer. Just like the Jackson films wrote him as a grumpy, condescending overprotective dad. Sigh.

“[Evil] waits. And at the moment of our complacency, it blinds us.” I mean…yeah, that’s basically how it goes down in Middle-earth. Repeatedly.

Not Elrond mansplaining about Valinor to someone who was literally born there…

None of these people look like Elves.

“I’m going with you!” But why?!? This lady is a healer with a youngish son still dependent on her at home!!!

I really hate them saying “mum” instead of “ma” or “mama” or something similar. (I’d also hate it if they were saying “mom,” to be clear. It’s just so modern-sounding and breaks any immersion they’ve built so far.)

Wow, the hilt of a broken sword with Sauron’s symbol on it… Generic “halfling” characters I can enjoy as a homage. This is lazy writing. And see? I knew her son needed adult supervision. (It’s also a ripoff of Pippin and the Palantir.)

(muttering) None of these people look—oh, forget it.

Elves don’t age as Men do (or age extremely slowly/imperceptibly), so what’s going on with this dude?

Gorgeous, all.

Ents???

Galadriel jumping off of the ship and just…floating there in the middle of the sea is as silly as the naysayers said it would be. However, I thought the scene leading up to it was fairly well-executed, though I wish they’d done a better job animating the rain of silver glass that leads into Valinor…that image has always resonated with me.

The Good:

Many absolutely stunning visuals thanks to great set design (with Valinor of all places somehow being the least-impressive!) and, apart from some cheap/underwhelming looks, costume design that varies from good to great

A solid score that seems to be trying a little bit too hard to mimic Howard Shore’s from the films

Morfydd Clark, in her entirety; the writing for Galadriel might be awful in upcoming episodes, but her casting was inspired

I find the Harfoots whimsically charming, at least so far, especially Nori.

The use of Tolkienesque maps to indicate location changes

An attempt was clearly made, in this episode if nowhere else, to pay homage to the source material, even the source material they don’t have the rights to use outright (the Two Trees, Morgoth, perhaps Luthien)…it’s better than nothing.

The Bad

Every single male Elf is miscast; yes, I said every single one, from Galadriel’s brother to Elrond to the OC Arondir. Gil-galad and Celebrimbor look like they’re in their late 40s/50s, at best, and idk…there’s nothing “Elvish” or “ageless” about any of the male actors playing Elves. (Full disclosure: I don’t remember being impressed by the male Elves in the Jackson films, either.) I also saw someone say that Gil-galad looks like Liam Neeson in a mullet, and now I can’t unsee that.

Some really clunky dialogue

Lack of adequate backstory/exposition…but exposition in an adaptation like this is hard, because most of it is contained in The Silmarillion, for which they don’t own the rights.

Building on that theme, I appreciate the idea of “showing not telling,” however…did they ever tell us Galadriel’s brother name (Finrod)? Or that “the king” is Gil-galad? Or even suggest that there are a variety of different Elves in Middle-earth? A lot of people know these things, because we know Tolkien. But I’ve got to assume that a lot of others don’t. Heck, it took them until almost the end of the episode to name one of their OCs (Bronwyn).

Some worthless scenes, like Galadriel’s company fighting the “ice troll” in the mountains. Actually, the entire sequence in the mountain lair was badly-written.

I don’t care about the “forbidden romance” subplot between the OCs Arondir and Bronwyn…if they’d spent longer than a few minutes in the first episode establishing their relationship/characters, maybe I’d be more invested. (See my earlier complaint about unnecessarily short seasons—some stories need room to grow!)

Even though my criticism outweighs my praise, even though I’m a self-identified Tolkien purist, I thought this was…fine. It’s an absolute feast for the eyes, truly gorgeous to watch (even with all those woefully miscast male Elves)—visually, apart from a few moments of obvious CGI, it’s what I would expect/want from a Tolkien adaptation! My expectations aren’t high for the rest of the series. There are upcoming plot points that I know will disappoint, infuriate, and disgust me. But considering that I went into this episode expecting to loathe it, I was pleasantly surprised.

Besides, I’m going to keep watching no matter what to see more of Nori and Morfydd’s face. This also makes me want to finish The Silmarillion, which I have been starting and then “saving for later” since I was a small child.

[mauesartetc]

So I was watching this bonkers roller coaster of an analysis video that bounces from topic to topic with a psychological thriller plot playing out in the gaps between them (though it does arrive at a point eventually). A bit before the 18-minute mark, it brings up the infamously bad movie "The Room" and how one specific character is written as unrealistically malicious, with no clear motivation or logic behind her behavior. It's as if Tommy Wiseau purposefully crafted a sadistic monster with no redeeming qualities in order to make the audience hate her.

Then it hit me. That sounds terribly familiar.

I can't believe I can say, with zero exaggeration, that the characterization of Stella from Helluva Boss is on par with that of Lisa from The Room. And yet, here we are.

The video speculates that Lisa and Johnny's relationship could be based on an actual breakup Tommy Wiseau went through, and that this is his perspective of how things went down. Johnny (a fairly transparent self-insert) is portrayed as the innocent hero who's practically perfect in every way, while Lisa is cruel and vindictive for no good reason. It's obvious viewers are meant to see Johnny as the good guy and Lisa as nothing but a loathsome villain to boo and hiss at, much like Helluva Boss's narrative wants us to sympathize with Stolas and curse Stella's name.

Fun fact: One of my own characters is also unsympathetic by design. He's an obnoxious sleazeball who constantly hits on women and has a hair-trigger temper. But he's also witty, an ardent defender of his beliefs, and individualistic despite the strict, conformist environment he was brought up in. Every time he sees a loophole to exploit, he will, for better or worse. It would've been the easiest thing in the world to make this character a one-note asshole with no substance, but where's the fun in that? How would that be interesting?

But how a writer develops characters isn't just an indicator of their work ethic, their commitment to quality, or their enjoyment of the act itself. It also says something about how they see the world, or more specifically, the people in it.

I'm just wondering what the hell it takes to be okay with writing strawman villains like Lisa and Stella. How misanthropic and/or sheltered do you have to be to view anyone, even fictional characters, as this thoroughly monstrous?

Tommy? Viv? Are you okay? Who hurt you?

Seriously, who hurt you?

[stellar-constellations]

I think Yuri is still likeable for lot of fans but his story is still very lacking and the growing of his character didn’t shown as obvious much as other main character. And his angry behavior is easy to got hates and judges. Which is sad though because I believe when he’s getting softer and meet different people, we will see a different side of him. That’s why it’s very interesting to see his interaction to other character because most of the times we only see his comedy sides whenever he interact with the Forgers.

I’m do think for a request, I want to know some side story of Yuri and readers in daily life when they still in sss. I do like the details of the reader making brownies and Yuri enjoying it. I do think it will be cute if Yuri invited the reader to the flower store and met his mother grave and gave the brownie as a gratitude. ( or the brownies remind him of Yor or his mother cooking) As something that he wants to make a vow or a promised to taking care of his loved one. It’s will be heartwarming imo but if this is too out of your league ( and since we didn’t have much material of Briars past yet) then it’s okay if you could ignore my RQ.

I do read your updates btw I love it.

        

      Fem! (Y/N) x Mean! Yuri Briar

        This can be read with or without reading my Yuri Briar x Fem! Spy! Reader series: An Alliance (part 1)

        Setting is BEFORE the reader rejoined WISE (so after she declared her resignation to Twilight).

        (Y/N) as her own background in correlation to the Yuri Briar x Fem! Spy! Reader series for plot purposes!

        Yuri is unnecessarily rude to (Y/N).

        Baking is very important for (Y/N). You can take away many things in life; a person's home, their family, their friends, their confidence, their drive, but you can't take away tradition. Tradition is something that will always be passed down, from generation to generation, it can never truly die out, it will always remain in the world. 

        (Y/N) has certain values and traditions that cannot be swayed by anyone, not even the infamous Yuri Briar, a valued lieutenant in Ostania's State Security Service, can change that. Nobody can change (Y/N)'s love for cooking, for family, and for laughter. 

        The first time Yuri woke up without (Y/N) in his bed was a few months ago and he almost had a full blown meltdown. He quickly ran out of his bedroom, half-dressed with his arm stuck in his jacket, hopping on one foot as he tried to slide on his boots.

        "Yuri?" a voice from the kitchen spoke, peeking their head out of the kitchen.

        It's (Y/N)! Yuri smiled, glad she didn't escape. I didn't want to get fired by loosing her, or  have to track her down and kill her in the streets at three a.m. when I could be sleeping.

        "What are you doing?" Yuri hissed, holding his guard up high as he walked into the kitchen. 

        "Jesus, Yuri! You should've said something sooner! I would've stabbed you!" (Y/N) huffed.

        Yuri's eyes traveled to her hands and his eyes widened.

        "YOU WERE GONNA STAB ME?!" Yuri shouted.

        "NO!" (Y/N) shouted back, placing the knife on the counter. "I thought you were an intruder! Like a Westalis spy finding out that I'm working with you or something like that!" 

        "Do you understand that if you stab someone in my apartment, I'll most likely be arrested too? I'm not helping you get away with murder." Yuri hissed.        

        "Boo-hoo." (Y/N) teased sarcastically, a frown on her face. "Just go back to bed." 

        "No! How do I know you're not planning on stabbing me while I sleep? Or trying to run away?" Yuri spoke, then paused as he smelt something drift in the air.

        It was something sugary, something sweet, and something that smelt divine (not that Yuri would ever let her know). 

        "What are you doing? Are you trying to set ablaze the whole apartment complex?" Yuri questioned, moving past (Y/N) to the dessert in the oven as he crouched down, looking into the small window. "Was dinner not enough?" Yuri rudely sneered, causing (Y/N) to throw a wooden spoon at the back of his head. "HEY!"

        "DON'T HEY ME! THE AUDACITY OF YOU!" she shouted, grabbing an oven mitt and throwing it at him.

        At least that's softer... Yuri thought before sending (Y/N) a glare.

        "I just wanted something sweet! You won't let me leave the apartment so I figured I'd make brownies since you have all the ingredients." (Y/N) sighed. 

        "Are they drugged? Are they laced with poison?" Yuri questioned, giving (Y/N) a suspecting glare.

        "You're really insecure and sensitive, you know?" (Y/N) commented.

        "I'M NOT!" Yuri shouted, his pride slightly ruined. 

        "You're also absolutely terrible with social cues! We have neighbors!" (Y/N) hissed.

        "Like you weren't screaming a minute ago!" Yuri huffed.

        "You called me fat!" (Y/N) claimed.

        "Indirectly..." Yuri mumbled.

        "It still held the same meaning!" (Y/N) spat out, before sighing, deciding not to entertain him any longer. "Whatever. Since you're up, be useful and do the dishes." 

        "You're the one baking at three A.M. You do it!" Yuri groaned.

        "Yeah? Well, you're going to be eating some too!" (Y/N) replied, before allowing her composure to falter. "Please... do the dishes..?"

        "Fine. What are you even doing up anyways?" Yuri sighed, walking to the sink.

        The question made (Y/N) frown, a nasty glare shot Yuri's way.

        "It doesn't matter why I'm up. It's not like you actually care anyways!" (Y/N) accused quit boldly (and rudely).

        "You want me to be nice to you but you're so defensive." Yuri groaned, complaining as he rolled his eyes and turned on the sink faucet.

        "I just couldn't sleep, alright? Just some nightmares..." (Y/N) mumbled.

        I understand that... Yuri thought, his hardened angry red eyes softening to plush red, before he put the mask up once more. No! Don't get comfortable! She could be trying to use you for any information from the SSS! Or Yor!

        "You still get nightmares? At your age?" Yuri smirked. "I thought Flower was supposed to protect you?" 

        "Ugh! See? You don't care!" (Y/N) huffed, crossing her arms as she adverted her eyes. "I don't know why I bother when I do!" 

        "No! I'm sorry, sorry!" Yuri spoke quickly, as if afraid she'll leave him. "I... understand. I woke up too because of a nightmare..." he admitted, swallowing his pride. 

        "What was it about?" (Y/N) questioned, scooting closer to Yuri as he started to wash her dirty cookware.

        "You don't nee-" Yuri paused, remembering her words from just a few seconds ago. "Ah..." he grumbled, then took a breath. "I lost my parents too. My mother's affected me the most. Yor looks so much like her, you know..." Yuri took another breath. "Just miss 'em."

        "I understand. My brothers were always at each others throats, including mine. We fought all the time. It's crazy that despite living in the exact same situation, we had completely different views on the world." (Y/N) smiled, reminiscing the past. "My younger brother was so brave and careless, he never let anyone boss him around, so he got in a lot of fights with my dad and authority. My youngest brother was cold one second, then lovey dovey the next. He had some learning problems, but he really just wanted someone to be proud of him..." (Y/N) paused, thinking of her next words. 

        "I had an older sister too, and an older brother. My older brother was really cold, very distant and all. He was kind of like you, believed everyone was out to get him; he wanted to be independent and be his own person." (Y/N) giggled as Yuri paused from washing the dishes to instead watching her smile. "And Yor? God, she reminds me so much of my older sister. My older sister was always looking out for us younger ones, and she was so kind too. I really miss my dad too, he really helped me with who I am today." (Y/N) paused, realizing she was rambling. "What about you, Yuri?" she questioned, turning her gaze to Yuri, surprised to see he was already looking at her. 

        "Oh! Uh..." Yuri gasped, adverting his eyes as he got back to washing the dishes. "I miss my mom... She would make me and Yor this southern stew and it tasted really good, unfortunately, I don't know how to make it." Yuri sighed.

        "Does Yor know?" (Y/N) questioned.

        "Well, she's trying to replicate it. I love Yor's cooking, but... her stew doesn't quite taste like our mom's." Yuri spoke, cracking a smile. "She's buried here in Ostania, in fact, I should go see her sometime. That'd be nice..." Yuri trailed off, getting lost in his own past before he remembered (Y/N) was present and redirected his attention back to her. "So... what about your mom? I just, never heard you mention her, at all." 

        "I don't know much about her." (Y/N) confessed. "She stayed in (birth country) when my dad moved to Westalis for his job. She cheated on my dad and left all of us." 

        "Oh, I'm sorry." Yuri spoke on reflex, but he couldn't help but feel a tinge of pity.

        "Don't be. She never stuck to a mother role even when she was apart of my life. When she left, my dad and I had to start caring for our family. My older siblings weren't reliable with jobs; she had a neurological problem and my older brother was still defying against authority, teenage angst and all. I couldn't have my six and five-year-old brothers working with me, they were still exploring the world and worrying about what game to play next. I forced myself to grow up early since I knew my dad needed help, so I took up that job at the bakery. In fact, that's how I know this brownie recipe!" (Y/N) smiled.

        "Huh..." Yuri muttered, thinking to himself.

        Even before the war, (Y/N) still had a lot to deal with in her life. When was the last time she really had a break? Yuri thought to himself. Whatever. I shouldn't be caring about that! Everyone goes through some hardships secretly, she's no different!

        "Hey, Yuri..." (Y/N) started, pausing to think.

        I want to ask him about his dad, but he hasn't said anything about it (and unlike him, I understand my words can affect people)... (Y/N) thought to herself. 

        "Yeah?" Yuri hummed.

        "...Uh, you think we can skip work Friday? We've just been working soooo much, it's getting boring." she questioned, immediately coming up with an excuse to replace her real question as she smiled stupidly.

        "Don't be ridiculous." Yuri huffed. "We have a job together now, I'm not going to allow you to run back to WISE!" 

        "Hey! I told you in the contract that I'll work with you guys, sheesh! Besides, I was able to get a resignation message across to them." (Y/N) sighed.

        "When? Where? With who? When was this?" Yuri questioned immediately, slamming his hands against the counter.

        "Don't worry! Now back to the dishes with you!" (Y/N) huffed, changing the subject.

        "Fine..." Yuri grumbled. "You know, what's with you doing all the cooking? You're aware I can help out too?" Yuri questioned.

        You're raised by Yor, and I heard from Twilight that her cooking isn't quite edible... (Y/N) thought to herself, avoiding to give him that reasoning as he'd probably throw a knife at her for saying that.

        "You can only take so many things from me, but you can't ever take away what I've learned from my da. Cooking reminds me of my home. Whenever me and my dad had the time, we'd make meals together for the family." (Y/N) explained. "I may have a bad memory, but the day I let go of my family's legacy is the day I die."

        "You're so human that it's a little weird..." Yuri mumbled.

        "That's because I am human!" (Y/N) exclaimed. "You act like I'm a monster or something." (Y/N) sighed, a little disheartened.

        "Westalis sp-"

        "Shut it!" (Y/N) growled, cutting Yuri off. "The rare occasion we actually have a decent conversation, you go ahead and ruin it!" she exclaimed, checking the brownies before grabbing a mitt, removing them from the oven and onto the counter with a towel under the pan, then turned the oven off. "I'm not in the mood for sweets anymore; I'm going to bed." (Y/N) huffed, walking out of the kitchen and turning the corner, disappearing from Yuri's sight.

        Yuri stood in the kitchen alone, thinking of the events prior to her leaving.

        Maybe I was a little mean... Yuri admitted to himself. It doesn't matter. It never said in the contract that I had to be nice to her. 

        It might've not said it in the contract, but Yuri's aware of what little human decency he has towards anyone but Yor, he's aware he's a little too harsh on the poor girl. He knows if he ever acted like how he treats (Y/N) to Yor, he'd cut his own tongue off (after telling Yor over and over about how sorry he is). 

        In truth, he really doesn't know how to act with someone who isn't his sister, much less a girl, much much less his once-enemy (since she does work with him now).

        Yuri didn't have friends growing up, he was too focused on his studies so he can change the world into something better for Yor, so he's never really had the social interaction he should have. Even in school when he had to work with others in groups, he would take the task on by himself because he believed they'd get in his way. 

        Yuri also doesn't have much luck with girls too. Sure, he's attractive and it helps bring in potential suitors, but he's too obsessive over his sister which usually steers girls off (that, or he's convinced they're a spy [which is technically true in this case] trying to get information from him because why would someone say "hi" to him without wanting to betray their country? [Yuri really needs to get a grip]). 

        Yuri finished washing the dishes that (Y/N) requested from him and stared at the pan of brownies, deep in thought. 

        She did say they weren't poisoned... so... I guess I can try just one? Otherwise this'll all go to waste! Besides, she did say I was going to eat them too, so she had it in mind that we're sharing. Yuri thought, convincing himself of why he should give into the ex-spy's cooking.

        He cut a brownie out of the pan and was surprised by the chocolatey delicacy. It had extra chocolate chips in it and it was a perfect mix of fudge and cake. He took another one to eat, then another, and another after that one. He was halfway through the pan before he realized and stopped himself, remembering her words.

        ("...Cooking reminds me of my home")

        ("I'm not in the mood for sweets anymore, I'm going to bed.")

        She made these for herself, but she did have the intent of sharing them with him, so he supposes he can leave some for her. 

        He covered the leftover brownies with aluminum foil and placed the pan to the side, turning off the lights and walking back to his own room, already seeing (Y/N) in his bed and sleeping.

        "Oi, wake up." Yuri spoke, shaking her shoulders.

        She groaned and ignored him, causing him to get a little frustrated and shake her awake a bit harsher. 

        "Wake up!" Yuri hissed.

        "What?" (Y/N) huffed, annoyed she got woken up. "You know how much sleep I need and today's our day off so I wanna sleep in!"

        "I'm sorry..." Yuri muttered.

        (Y/N) looked up at him, a little confused as she sat up from the bed.

        "Sorry...? For what?" (Y/N) questioned.

        "For being rude... and I guess for waking you up..." Yuri huffed.

        "You guess...?" (Y/N) deadpanned.

        "Don't expect so much from me!" Yuri exclaimed. 

        "Oh, don't worry, I'm not." (Y/N) smiled.

        "HEY!" Yuri screamed. "You can never take anything seriously!" Yuri grumbled.

        "I'm messing with you, Yuri. Hop in." (Y/N) giggled, grabbing his arm and pulling him under the covers with her.

        "H-hey! Let go of me!" Yuri shouted, a dark blush on his face as he was shoved in her cleavage.

        "To be honest. I've never heard someone apologize to me before—it's very gratifying." (Y/N) admitted.

        "You're so full of yourself. AND LET GO OF ME!" Yuri screamed.

        "You're such a tsundere..." (Y/N) sighed, obliging as she unwrapped her arms from him. 

        They got comfortable together in the sheets as Yuri closed his eyes, feeling himself slip off.

        "Yuri, earlier you said I never take anything seriously." (Y/N) spoke up.

        "And?" Yuri questioned, his eyes still closed.

        "That's not true." (Y/N) confirmed.

        "...And...?" he questioned.

        "You should be less serious, have some fun. Trust me, it makes life a lot better." (Y/N) smiled. "They say laughter heals a broken heart, and judging by your personality, you could use a good laugh."        

        "Your face is enough for me." Yuri muttered.

        "Aw th— hey!" (Y/N) exclaimed.

        Yuri let out a small chuckle, one that brought a grin on (Y/N)'s face.

        "See? Just like that? You should do it more often..." (Y/N) muttered, her voice a little softer and more sultry than usual.

        "Shut up and go to bed..." Yuri huffed, ignoring the blush growing on his face. "Tomorrow, I'll take you somewhere."

        "Ooo, like a date?" (Y/N) teased.        

        "NO! AND I SAID SHUT UP!" Yuri screamed.

        .

        .

        It was (Y/N)'s turn to wake up alone, confused on the whereabouts of her fake husband.

        "Yuri?" she called out, hopping out of bed and walking out of the bedroom. 

        "Kitchen!" Yuri answered.

        (Y/N) walked into the kitchen and noticed the aluminum foil on the pan. She shot Yuri a curious glance who immediately avoided her eyes. She lifted the foil from the pan and saw half the pan gone, now understanding Yuri's guilty expression. 

        "Damn it! Should've done a larger dose..." (Y/N) muttered.

        "W-what?" Yuri questioned.

        I don't remember it tasting funny? Unless the divine taste was poison?! Yuri thought, alarms going off in his head.

        "Kidding, kidding!" (Y/N) smiled, then loud out a laugh as she recovered the pan. "I saw an opportunity."

        "Ha ha..." Yuri grumbled sarcastically.

        "You like 'em?" (Y/N) questioned.

        "...Yeah..." Yuri muttered, crossing his arms as his face heated up. "Hurry up and get dressed."

        "Where exactly are we going?" (Y/N) questioned. 

        "You'll see." Yuri dragged on.

        "Fine..." (Y/N) sighed.

        (Y/N) walked to their shared bedroom, grabbing a pair of clothes and changing into them real quick as Yuri waited for her in the living room. 

        "Are we visiting Yor?" (Y/N) asked, fixing the sleeves on her shirt. 

        "Close." Yuri replied, causing a delightful smile on her face.

        "We're visiting your mother!" (Y/N) beamed, then ran into the kitchen.

        She grabbed the pan from the counter, returning to Yuri. 

        "What's that for?" Yuri questioned.

        "It's normal to bring offerings to the dead, yeah?" (Y/N) smiled.

        "I guess..." Yuri muttered, then grabbed (Y/N)'s arm. "Let's go." 

        "You can hold my hand instead of my arm, unless I'm courting you? That's cool too." (Y/N) teased. 

        "It's so you don't run away." Yuri reaffirmed quickly, quick to assure (Y/N) wouldn't get the wrong idea as he unlocked the front door and walked out with (Y/N), closing and locking the door behind him. 

        "We're supposed to be a couple, remember?" (Y/N) smiled, shaking Yuri's grip from her forearm and instead holding his hand.

        "If that's the case, let me hold that." Yuri sighed, grabbing the pan from the hand that wasn't in (Y/N)'s grip. 

        "I'm glad to know chivalry isn't dead." (Y/N) teased.

        "Don't start it." Yuri warned.

        .

        .

        Yuri drove to a flower shop, making a quick stop and getting a bouquet of forget-me-nots, having them wrapped in a red ribbon. They re-entered the car as Yuri handed (Y/N) the bouquet, driving to a place unknown for (Y/N).

        "It's really cute you got forget-me-nots." (Y/N) commented. 

        "They were my mother's favorite." Yuri replied, crouching down to the polished gravestone as he held out his hand, signaling for her to give him the flowers.

        (Y/N) obliged immediately, handing him his flowers as she patiently waited for him to finish his internal conversation with his mother from beyond the grave. It must've been a good twenty minutes of watching Yuri silently mourn before he finally stood up from the dirt, clearing his throat.

        "Ready?" Yuri questioned.

        "Can I talk to her?" she questioned.

        "Talk? I mean... I guess? She won't say much though." Yuri smiled.

        "Starting to take to my humor. Huh, pretty boy?" (Y/N) laughed as Yuri shook his head, a blush on his face. "Wanna wait in the car? Or somewhere where you can see me? I wanna have a private conversation with her." 

        "I guess I can. No running off though." Yuri spoke sternly.

        "Yes, sir." (Y/N) saluted playfully, smiling as Yuri walked back into his car, climbing in and shutting the door as he watched her through the window.

        "It's a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Briar. Would you look at that, we have the same title! Well... kind of. It's not official or anything." (Y/N) smiled, kneeling down to the dirt and talking as if she was really present. "I have a gift for you. They're brownies. Yuri ate some, but I hope you enjoy the rest." She spoke, placing the covered pan in front of the grave next to the flower bouquet. "My name is (Y/N) (L/N), my real name that is. In case you're wondering, I'm from Westalis. I do hope it doesn't bring any ill intent or memories to you, I'm not quite sure how you died, but I feel the war might be apart of it. Is that why Yuri dislikes Westalis so much...?" (Y/N) trailed off, before regaining her thoughts. 

        "You have two very beautiful kids, inside and out. Yuri is very entertaining, and Yor is very sweet. I may not be Yuri's official wife, but I really think I'll stick around for some time, or at least until Yuri gets sick of me, which is probably soon." (Y/N) chuckled. "I know we just met, and this is definitely out of the blue, but... I'm starting to warm up here in Ostania. I promise I'll look after Yuri for you. I can tell he's had it rough; I see myself in him, stubborn and determined." 

        "I'm not good with goodbyes, but I don't think that's necessary anyways. You're very important to Yuri, so you're important to me now; sorry, you can't change my mind on that part." (Y/N) smiled. "Yuri's waiting for me. He doesn't trust me at the moment, but I'm making progress. I'll make sure to visit you again, Mrs. Briar. We're in-laws now, so take care of yourself." 

        (Y/N) stood up from the dirt, swiping the dirt and grass off her feet as she bowed, showing her respects to Yuri's mother before running back and joining Yuri. 

        "You have a nice conversation?" Yuri questioned, starting up the car.

        "She told me to tell you that I'm her favorite girl you've ever brought to meet her." (Y/N) joked.         

        "You're the first one." Yuri deadpanned.

        "It's a joke." (Y/N) explained. "But, in actuality. I bet she was really lovely. I mean, she's a good listener, that's for sure."

        "Whatever." Yuri smiled, resisting the urge to laugh. "Let's go home. Find a movie to watch or something. We still have the day off." 

        It's a learning process for the both of them, to learn how to share a space and cooperate with each other. (Y/N) was raised to deceive and kill, Yuri was raised to follow his heart's content (even if his life goal is a bit... peculiar). It's a lot of work to be around someone when you've been alone for most of your life.

        (Y/N) didn't have a family to return to, a friend to tell secrets to and for them to stay alive long enough to keep, a crush to confess to. She had to become everything she wanted; her family, her home, her best friend, and her number one supporter. Yuri didn't have a mother or father to greet once he's come home from school. It also didn't help his sister was working a lot to help support him. He was never greeted home with a warm home cooked meal from mother and a football session afterwards. He didn't have time for things a normal boy would do; get into trouble with his friends, ask a girl out, or even play childish games such as "tag". Now that they have each other, they can be each other's friends, family, perhaps over time, even lovers. Even though they've both been hurt by their afflictions to either the West or East, they can still learn to care and love each other. 

        After all, as the saying goes, only time can heal a broken heart. 

        BONUS! (Daily life + headcannons!):

        This is intended for the Yuri Briar x Fem! Spy! (Y/N) series and there are SPOILERS for the story down below! Click here to read the first chapter: Part 1.

        (Y/N) and Yuri wake up at 5 A.M., a good ten minutes is spent of Yuri fighting (Y/N) out of bed. 

        It's become a habit for (Y/N) to make them both coffee while Yuri reads the daily newspaper. 

        Depending on how much work they had the previous day and how they feel, they either make breakfast together or go out to eat at a nearby breakfast club. 

        (Y/N) and Yuri either drive to work or take the bus, it really depends on how Yuri is feeling (did Yuri drink last night or no?) 

        Yuri refuses for (Y/N) to drive since he's convinced she'll try and drive them off a bridge. 

        Yuri once had to take (Y/N) to the clinic to get her flu shot and was awestruck at how scared she was of needles ([Y/N] cried before they even stuck a needle into her).

        (Y/N) is afraid of needles because of how many she had to see during her time in the Westalis military. Needles usually didn't mean good things. Since there were many injuries in the war and not many supplies or technology, some nurses and doctors had to bullshit their way through things. She saw someone have a bad reaction to one of the needles and it traumatized her since then. 

        Yuri holds her hand when she gets shots (she almost broke his hand from holding it so tight, but Yuri sucked it up [despite having a terrible pain tolerance] and didn't let her see in case she got worried for him). 

        Flower ([Y/N]'s stuffed bunny) was retrieved in the rubble of (Y/N)'s childhood house by Hujo and given back to her at the military shelter. Flower was a toy her father had given her once and it's only the only physical thing she has of her childhood home.

        (Y/N) has a short temper but tries her best to hide it (especially since she lives with Yuri now, everyday is a patience test). 

        (Y/N) sleep-talks (Yuri figured that out the hard way). 

        (Y/N) and Yuri once watched a horror movie together in a drive-in theater. That same night, (Y/N) muttered phrases the demons said in the movies, Yuri was convinced (Y/N) somehow got possessed and hit her awake with a pillow (he did not apologize after [Y/N] explained that she sleep-talks).

        (Y/N) adores Anya and spoils her. (Y/N) doesn't believe she'll find real love in the future, so she doesn't believe she'll have kids (either she won't find someone, or she'll die from the SSS or WISE). Because of this, (Y/N) treats Anya like her own daughter and spoils her with peanuts (Anya likes [Y/N] more because of this). 

        Yuri once had a two-hour study session teaching (Y/N) and Anya basic algebra (the girls both ended up falling asleep as Yuri quietly muttered to himself about how hopeless they are).

        When Yuri got shot during their mission saving one of the Eden Academy buses, (Y/N) refused to leave Yuri's side during the whole healing process. 

        When (Y/N) feels guilty of deceiving Yuri (go to part 8 to understand why), she cooks a lot for him. Her father once told her that food is a way to a man's heart and she fully believes that.

        (Y/N) once ran into one of the WISE agents with Yuri in public, but the agent didn't know Yuri was apart of the SSS! The agent tried to talk to (Y/N) but got punched in the face by (Y/N) who claimed he was a pervert (it was that or being executed). 

        Yuri keeps a close eye on (Y/N) in public, not only so he can make sure he doesn't try and run away, but also so (Y/N) doesn't get injured since she's very clumsy (he lost count with how many times he watched her trip over air or walk straight into still poles). He walks on the side with traffic so she doesn't accidentally walk into ongoing traffic.

        Yuri falls asleep really easy since he's tired from his job, but he'll secretly wait until (Y/N) sleeps so that he knows she's not getting up to any mischief (is what he says, in actuality, he enjoys spending his time with (Y/N). 

        The teddy bear (Y/N) gave Yuri in part 9 is now (Y/N)'s pillow (even though it was meant for Yuri). Yuri gets very jealous of it; he can deal with the small stuffed-rabbit, but the huge teddy bear taking up his bed is very annoying since (Y/N) will subconsciously hold it in her sleep instead of Yuri. 

        I hoped you enjoyed this fanfic and thank you for your requests and support! Feel free to ask for anything else or any other characters from my masterlist! This applies to everyone reading, follower or not!