#bmezine

[boydmods4lifee]

[epellucid]

via

[fev4rrr]

[yetanotherknitter]

me: hell yeah I'm gonna follow the body modification encyclopedia!

instagram every time BMEzine posts: ooh, that's a really spooky image. like. some real sensitive material right there. you sure you wanna see that? real sure? like, reeeeealy?

[dvdregionseven]

our commitment to keeping BME operational remained unwavering. However, we encountered an unprecedented challenge when multiple systems experienced a catastrophic failure

My guy, that site stayed heartbleed vulnerable longer than the heartbleed detector remained functional. RAR what's left, seed the torrent, and fuck off.

[smaller-comfort]

Sometimes, when writing porn, one finds oneself staring into the abyss, and the abyss whispers, "monster fucking and size difference." And you're like, okay sure, that's not that big of a leap at all.

But sometimes the abyss whispers "watersports" and you kind of just have to sit there on the edge and rethink your life choices.

Literacy was a mistake!

[painthropologist]

Pain, in the words of the author, part 1

This blog post contains graphic photos of hook suspensions. Please proceed with caution if you are squeamish!

It would be amiss to discuss my work on pain without providing my motivations behind doing so. This is an autobiographical account of my relationship with pain and how it has shaped my understanding of the world and myself. It is a diary entry of sorts, that allows you a glimpse into my personal world, and will hopefully give you an understanding of pain that varies from standard pain narratives as deviant or otherwise “sick”. I invite you into my world in the hopes that readers who have a personal relationship with pain feel less alone, as pain is an isolating experience, and to show the curious that pain is something that is beyond what standard narratives revile.

I began my journey with aesthetic body modifications two decades ago, bar the simple earlobe piercings my mother cajoled me into getting at the age of six. I began with a nostril piercing, done while I was underage at a mall in Singapore with a piercing gun. Looking back at this highly inadvisable decision, I wince, but it was the beginning of something so much bigger. Ever since I was a young child, I had a fascination with body modifications like tattoos and piercings, and it came as no surprise (but with plenty of disappointment) to my parents and teachers that by the time I was 18, I had amassed several piercings and a couple of tattoos, done by practitioners who turned a blind eye to my lack of ID. Some of these piercings I still have today, including my tongue, first nostril, upper lip, and several ear piercings. Needless to say, the tattoos are still there, albeit in need of some touching up. 

One of the main topics of this blog, hook suspensions, was something that I did not try until my 20th birthday. Growing up in the multicultural society of Singapore, it was a yearly occurrence to watch the Hindu Thaipusam ceremony, whereby devotees of Murugan pierce their bodies with multiple long skewers and needles to carry a kavadi, a heavy ornamental structure, which they carry while dancing in a trance from temple to temple. Despite being Chinese, I developed a fascination with Thaipusam almost immediately, marvelling at how devotees could perform such a feat under what I imagined to be excruciating pain. 

At the age of 13, I discovered the online forum BMEzine, a website dedicated to body modifications of all sorts. However, my curiosity and lack of parental Internet supervision led me to the “extreme” sections of the website, which hosted hundreds of photos of body modifications I didn't know even existed or knew to be possible. There were split tongues and penises, tattooed eyeballs, enormous stretched piercings, and of course, hook suspensions.

My first reaction to seeing the hook suspension gallery was immediate revulsion. I felt nauseous and confused. I asked the same question I get from every lay person outside of the heavy body modification scene I get today when I explain my enthusiasm for hook suspensions: why? It was more than the pain that shocked me. Thaipusam was one thing, but in comparison to the thick hooks rammed into the skin and flying bodies I saw on the Internet, it seemed tame. I had no idea that skin could even do that. I closed the browser and did not open that section of BMEzine again for several years.

On the cusp of my 20th birthday, I was discussing with a few friends from university what I should do as a rite of passage from my teens. It was unanimously decided that it had to be something body modification related. By this stage I was relatively heavily pierced (by “normal people” standards, anyway), and had amassed a few tattoos of varying size and quality. As much as I loved piercings and tattoos, they seemed passe. I needed to go bigger. Then, one of my friends made a bold statement. “Hey, have you ever seen those people who hang from the ceiling from hooks?” 

My memory immediately flashed back to 13 year old me sitting at the family computer dry heaving with horror. This time, however, I was intrigued. I knew my piercer and world-renowned body modification artist in Sydney, Australia, was also a hook facilitator, but the question was whether I was ready for hooks. I went home that night after the pub and brought up BMEzine again. This time, I was ready. The next day, I booked in with my piercer, and raised funds for the suspension by walking around the pub with an upturned hat and asking strangers for loose change to crowdfund the experience. After being asked what I was planning on doing with the money, almost everyone I spoke to threw a dollar or two into the hat, calling me (as Australians do) “batshit insane”. 

I recently found the video from my first suspension, that chronicled every step from marking up my back for a two-point (formerly known in suspension circles as a “suicide”) suspension to my first step into flight and the aftermath. Looking back at 20 year old me, some five suspensions and counting later, was bittersweet. Watching my face go from stern concentration and apprehension as I tottered back and forth uncertainly on tiptoes as my piercer gently swayed the rope I was attached to, to the combination of shock and glee as my feet left the floor of the tattoo parlour that night was an experience that was remarkable to see years later. There's something indescribably special about your first flight, no matter how many suspensions you do later down the line. It was baby's first suspension, and it would not be my last.

I took a three year hiatus from suspensions after that first one, mostly for financial reasons, but also because I didn't know after that initial flight whether I was ready for another one. It had been an overwhelmingly positive experience, but it wasn't until 2015, when I was planning my second visit to Norway, where I decided to get in touch with Wings of Desire (now disbanded), some of whose members were part of the legendary Pain Solution performance group, whom I'd idolised online since I was a teenager. It was a meeting that would change my life; almost ten years later, I am privileged to call my facilitators from that suspension, Alan Bellardinelli and June Bonsaksen (now co-founders of the Church of Pain/Smertekirken; more on that later) good friends. I had followed the exploits of the annual Oslo Suscon for several years by this stage, and while I was unable to make it to the event itself, I was determined to hang with Wings of Desire.

I organised the details and payment of the private suspension by email with June, and we agreed that I would do a lotus suspension. Sitting in lotus position on a piercing table, Alan, the head facilitator that day, walked me through what to expect. We settled on ten hooks (a significant jump from my previous two hooks), marked me up, and was pierced in tandem by Alan and another WoD member, Siv. After a lot of heavy breathing, nearly fainting from a combination of jetlag and low blood pressure and sugar, I felt my skin go taut and the table I'd been sitting on slide out from beneath me. That was it, I was flying again, and I knew for certain from that moment on that hooks would play a huge part in my life. Later that year, I flew back to Norway for a WoD Suspension Sunday event, which was hosted monthly at Blitz. However, unknown to me, it would be five years until my next suspension. From 2020, my relationship to pain in the form of suspensions would change entirely from a mode of thrill-seeking to a spiritual, embodied context that would eventually lead to this research project several years later.

This short summary of my relationship to pain over my early life hopefully provides some context for the passion that motivates my research. In the next post, I will discuss my relationship with hook suspension as a ritual practice, from my 2020 and 2024 rituals and eventual membership with the Church of Pain. You can read my field notes from my 2024 summer ritual here.

[aholefilledwithtwigs]

Does anyone else remember the person that used to be featured on modblog with an absolutely massive scrunnel? He used to wear a mayo jar as jewelry, would be at a lot of the bmezine events so there would be lots of photos of people sticking their arms/dicks etc through his scrotum

I’ve always loved scrunnels because they are just plain silly (can’t pierce the scrotum, so instead let’s cut a slit in front and back and then stitch it back up as a donut).

…how hard do you think it would be to convince a doctor doing an orchi to get creative with how they closed things up 😬

[dykepuffs]

This was a whole legal thing in the 90s and 00s - A bodymod practitioner and her husband in the US, got arrested and charged for "FGM" because they did (obviously, very much consensual!) clit removal and labia removal for people who wanted it done.

BMEzine had a huge legal fund for them, selling t shirts with the slogan "If pussy cutting is outlawed, only outlaws will cut pussy".

And the same applies in the UK - Here even female* genital piercing is in a legal grey area, because the laws intended to prevent FGC of children don't have any cutouts for adults who actively want genital modification. Of course "normalising" labiaplasties are still allowed, because conformity is key.

Effectively, government STILL has difficulty understanding that we might have inner lives and desires and can only "protect" us in the same way as you'd protect an endangered squirrel.

Also if someone wanted to have their clitoris removed it would be so much different than fgm. Like, just the process alone would be so much different

yes, that’s exactly my point! even if the surgeries were identical from the perspective of what’s being done, they would still be incredibly fucking different because in one case, a person is doing something they actively want and are informed about because it will make their life better, while in the other case, a person is having something done to them regardless of what they want that will in all likelihood make their life worse.

anyone who tries to compare the two is just proving that what they really care about is the supposed sacredness of the clitoris and vulva, not the autonomy and well-being of the people involved. they’re so focused on trying to protect the “female body” that they forgot they’re also supposed to give a shit about the people living in those bodies.

[boydmods4lifee]

[bodymods-br]

Bifurcação dessa mineira linda @samila.neri feita pelo @marcoskbodymod #splittongue #bifurcacaodelingua #bodymod #bodymodification #bmezine #bme . #Repost @samila.neri • • • • • • Cause the red lips #tonguesplit #tongueout #tongue #bodymodification #bodymodifications #piercings #vsco #vscogirl #tattooed #tattoedgirl #tattoedgirls #instavsco #alargabrincos #alargabrinco #alargadores #earplugs #batomvermelho #makeup #delineadocolorido #bifurcation #bifurcaciondelengua #modificaçãocorporal #modificacaocorporal (em São João del Rei) https://www.instagram.com/p/CF2hIS-FgVy/?igshid=ojqapaisjzkb

[fev4rrr]

R.I.P bme

[3liza]

its just not that hard to inject the local anesthetic, make a couple millimeter slices in front of my earlobes, and stitch up the slack. i think your average BMEzine guy could have me in and out of the chair in like 90 minutes with equal or superior results to the guy with the PhD whos going to charge me 15 grand. I'm not talking about implanting or grafting anything, its purely superficial incision and stitching and you can see how much to take off just by pinching your cheeks here and there

it's bullshit there no safe way for me to do cosmetic surgery at home. if i let someone else do it they're just gonna fuck it up

[bruno-bma]

#3dimplant #3dsiliconimplant #subdermalimplant #bme #bmezine #freelyexpressyourself #bodyart #bodymod #bodymods #brunobma #bodyartist #bodylanguage #bodymoddotorg #bodymodification #bodymodifications #bodymodificationitalia #tattoo #tatuaggio #tattoolife #tattooartist #tattooenergy #tattooitalia #tattooartistmag #ghirigorifamily #iltatuaggio #ilpiercing #ildilatatore #brunobma #ghirigorifamily #ghirigoridubino https://www.instagram.com/p/CLbib4ngwE8/?igshid=x99jt9v8ypqa

[sirclainabraxas]

[smaller-comfort]

A brief outtake from the modern AU thing I am Not Writing:

--

“I was so skinny back then,” lamented Resh'an.

“You looked like a slutty, redheaded stick insect.” Aephorul sniffed critically.

“The natural consequence of a diet composed almost entirely of coffee, cigarettes, and cock.” Resh'an sighed, leaning against Aephorul. “Those were the days.”

“I, for one, do not miss the grad student lifestyle.” He pressed a kiss to the top of Resh'an's head. “I like you better like this, anyway.” He grabbed a double handful of his husband's ass by way of demonstration.

Resh'an threw back his head and laughed, a beautiful, carefree sound; the kind of laugh that made Aephorul's chest hurt and his knees weak. “One of these days I'll go to the gym with you.”

“God, I hope not.” He leaned down for a kiss, meeting the shape or Resh'an's laughter with the sharp edges of his own smile.

--

(Terrible meme and some nattering below the cut because I'm Not Writing It but maybe I am writing it a just a *little* bit)

You know that post that's like "love those stories where all a character needs is some therapy and a consensual bdsm relationship but that's not what happens here." Well, that *is* what happens in this AU.

For someone who couldn't hack grad school I really do like to stick a lot of characters into academia!

Aephorul and Resh'an are in their mid/late 40s; Aephorul works for an evil pharmaceutical company and Resh'an has tenure at a local university (*not* Rutgers, but 2010 is a bad time for them regardless) in the chemistry department.

Aephorul almost dies in a motorcycle accident in the early 2000s, but he doesn't actually get rid of his bike until Resh'an ends up with a concussion after another accident in 2016.

Anyway. Resh'an's the one who's usually wearing a chastity device; they both like being tied up; Aephorul has a dick piercing and likes needles, in general; Resh'an makes a bratty sub but a dedicated service top.