#blah blah food autonomy for all n all that

[cyanendoskel]

what others do or do not eat is ultimately none of my business but therians who refuse to eat certain meats or expect other therians to not eat certain meats will always momentarily baffle me.

the situation catalyst to this post is me getting told off for eating poultry even though I'm a bird. First of all I'm a cat therian so birds are well within my diet. Second of all, many kinds of birds eat other birds. And most importantly, birds/poultry is a viable and easily available source of nutrients for my human body regardless of the diets of my other theriotypes.

[invisibleanonymousmonsters]

So I’ve read Blind Date like three times now. At first I was confused cause I wasn’t getting it, did they know each other? How did she get the balls to just go to a stranger? is he a stranger? Then again I am sick so that explains the confusion. 🤡🙃

I loved this. As someone who is not American I’ve always found it interesting how massively different people from within the US is. That part where they both mention stereotypes was so funny to me because that’s literally how we think of people form the US. It was hilarious. And then when she just explains to him 🥰🥰. That was a lovely piece of both of their brains and it’s a fun way to get to know people better. A fun but dangerous way. I’m sure Hoyt wouldn’t appreciate it.

What was mentioned about women’s bodies and the law is again so very incredibly annoying. I feel like that’s a consistent thing in almost all men. They act a certain, “protecting and supporting” women but when it comes to the important stuff, like bodily autonomy they just turn the other way or don’t see it that way because it doesn’t serve them. So yeah they really suck sometimes, it was very cool to see that being written. But then again, it’s always so amazing to see that you write that into your stories. It really is one of the many things that I love about your writing.

On a lighter note, I loved Layla. I know Layla. Layla has done this to me. I’m guessing she’s visiting Layla or something? I loved Layla, you captured THAT friend so perfectly. They’re always trying to set you up with their kinda man and what they think you want. While it’s endearing, it often times ends like this very creepy date. Why are men this way? Like honestly, they’re constantly saying women talk a lot and blah blah and then you go out on a date and they can’t shut up about themselves?! What is wrong with them? THAT OUTFIT WAS EVERYTHING. I was gonna say it was wasted on dumb boy Hoyt but then Sy got to see it and we don’t dress for no man but hot bear man got to see it 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 and then he got fast food 😍😍😍 I love him.

I’m so excited for this. I really want to know how they met. Was it a nice meeting? I know you mentioned that she put his friends in their place, but that makes me think of a lot of things? Was it a telling down? A lecture on something weird (maybe she’s into sports and they were slandering)? I don’t know, I wanna know.

So the next piece I'm going to write is when they meet. Since these are vignettes, I didn't want to pressure myself to keep them in order. So, no, Syverson was not a stranger. But Y/N only met him once at a party and they barely even interacted. Well, to Y/N they barely interacted.

Also, Layla is Y/N's cousin. (Some other people were confused by this, too.) Y/N's company decided to allow its employees to go permanently remote if they so choose. When Y/N's cousin, Layla, found out during their weekly facetime catch up, she begged Y/N to come stay with her. So Y/N decided to take a break from NYC for a year or so.

Syverson – Masterlist

[dancinginredshoes]

Sparkle Sparkle 2016 Gift

I drew @docholligay for her own Harumichi gift exchange! I ended up writing fics for two of her prompts instead of the one I planned to do. Happy Chanukah and New Years, Doc!

A Guide to Self Destruction

The Beginning Rehab was a joke. What else could it be if those in charge were just as damaged as those they were supposed to be helping? The night shift had never been pleasant to her health, not even when she started. Of course, back then Haruka had just been the newbie: only stuck on night shift since she had no seniority. It was awful, but it paid enough to get her a real apartment, her own apartment. She was finally free of her mother’s house and eventually, if she just kept pushing through, she would amass enough time to be free from this terrible eternal night.

But then her Gran fell. She had been the one to take her to the ER. She was the one who had to listen to the doctors explain that this fall was just a symptom of something far worse. She had cried alone in the bathroom trying to process it all.

It was probably then that she started cutting again. There, in the poorly lit ER bathroom, she used her Swiss army knife to open a thin red line across her belly. As the blood welled up, she could hear it whisper promises of control and release. Haruka just cleaned it up and headed back to her Gran’s room.

From there on, she took over as her Gran’s primary care giver. It’s not like anyone else in the family was going to. She set up Gran in her bed and took to sleeping on the couch. She was fine helping Gran in the toilet or after she was sick—she had become immune to bodily fluids from work. Haruka learned to subsist in coffee alone and used all of the money she had to feed and medicate her. She signed up for the night shift indefinitely in order to scrape together just a little bit more.

Do you know what it’s like to try to live on almost no sleep? Haruka guessed it was similar to being raised from the dead; she was functioning but most of what made her her was gone or wrong now. So the cutting never really went away. She had meant to stop when she brought Gran home, but it honestly had just gotten worse.

Every night during her break time, she would sneak off to one of the less used bathrooms and draw little lines on her skin. Yes she knew it was a bad way to exercise control and blah blah blah… But, God, it was the only time in the day that she did something for her self. With every little red track revealed, she would release a little rush of joy.

But it all changed when she got interrupted by a patient. And not just any patient, but the one that was incredibly gorgeous to boot! Haruka didn’t understand at all why, instead of bolting or ratting her out or even making fun of her, this woman helped her clean up the cuts and just talked with her.

And she came back the next night and the one after that and so on. And Haruka found herself drowning in Michiru’s eyes and the sound of her voice. She knew that this had moved beyond acceptable patient/orderly friendliness, but it was so easy to trade one harm for another. So, when Michiru first went up on tiptoes to kiss her, Haruka didn’t even try to resist. She just fell.

The Ending Rehab was a farce, just like everything else. Her parents had never taken interest in her life until her frivolities found their way into the tabloids. What she did behind closed doors had always been fine until it began to taint the public image her parents had painted. So they publicly lamented and leaked pictures of her checking into rehab to the press while, behind closed doors, Michiru had lost both her financial stream and her medical autonomy. She still wasn’t quite sure which she was more miffed at.

At least she had been given a private room. When she was released from counseling or group “enrichment”, she would retreat to solitude. When she decided to entertain, it was in her single. When she had left her room earlier, it had still been a private room.

So there was no reason for another patient to be reclining on her bed eating pudding.

“Excuse me, but you appear to have mistaken my room for yours. Would you please leave?” It wasn’t a request, but, in response, the other patient sucked on her spoon for a moment and released it with a pop.

“Nope.”

At the beginning of her stay, Michiru would have enjoyed breaking this girl. Putting the full force of her anger into the cat and mouse games that would keep this annoying addict from ever looking her way without cringing would have a fair substitute for her captors. But tonight had been nice. The past few weeks had been nice. The feel of running her hands through soft blonde hair, the ache in her calves from reaching up on tiptoe, the warmth of lips against hers whispering her name. No, she would rather use her energy on remembering the thrill and buzz, not dealing with a problem.

She pulled her shawl around her shoulders and crossed the room to the call button.

“Dr. Meiou is dealing with another patient, and Nurse Hino is taking her fifteen minute break now. It’s a waste hitting the call button; no one is going to answer.”

Michiru turned back to the intruder but stayed near the call button.

“What an interesting answer. For what reason do you know the night nurse’s schedule?” The girl on the bed sat up and smiled.

“I’m a people person. I’m a night owl. And,” she twirled her spoon. “I’m in here often.”

“So what does a insomniac repeat addict want?”

“I want you to stop.” All humor dropped from the interloper’s voice. Leaving her trash on the bed, she got up and leaned against the wall facing Michiru. “For the past week, you have been sleeping with Haruka, and you need to break it off. Now.”

Michiru’s cheeks reddened, but she kept the shock out of her voice.

“I don’t see how that is any of your business--”

“It’s not. It’s not any of my business if a patient and an orderly are having an affair. But did you know that Haruka’s grandmother is ill? That the only reason her grandmother receives good care is because Haruka is looking after her herself? Do you know how much she makes a year as an orderly? How the only reason she works nights is it pays just a little bit more? How even with that she can barely afford her box of an apartment and food let alone deal with an ailing relative to boot?” She slammed her fist into the wall near Michiru’s face and leaned in close. “I’m in intimate contact with rich bastards like you all of the time, and I’ve seen first hand how you work. This is all a cute distraction from how dull this retreat mummy and daddy sent you on is but when this all comes to light—and it always does—it’s not people like you who deal with the fall out. It’s people like her. A budget cut is enough to fire her. A scandal? That would be her career.”

Michiru clenched her hands to keep them from shaking, “D-don’t think you can threaten me!”

The girl just laughed and pulled back.

“If I thought I could make you run, I’d have already hidden the drugs in your room or beat that pretty face.” She reached behind her and adjusted the bright red bow in her hair. “What’s fucked up is that I actually think you like her—and I get it, she is easy to like. So I’m throwing all of my money away on the chance that you like her enough to not want to hurt her.”

She walked to the door of the room and turned to blow back a kiss. “And don’t let that be a wasted bet.”

The whirlwind left the room and Michiru stayed against the wall. She could see the obvious carrot and stick tactic—it wouldn’t be hard to maneuver against it, to retaliate, to continue on with those sweet caresses. Instead, she rose, got into bed, and let the taste of a kiss go cold on her lips.

It’s My Party and I’ll Kill You If I Want To Michiru knew too many builders. They would amass things like power, money, or even a large number of muscles to lord over others. They didn’t need words, just an institution behind them. I am the mountain, they’d seem to say, how can a small sapling like you grow in the darkness of my shade? There was only an inch of height she would need to counter. Her delicate and sharp heels were more than enough to cut to the heart of a mountain.

She knew too many insects too. People who liked to find small ways to nip at their target undetectable to the rest of the world. Then when the victim finally snapped—and they always did—the vermin could claim to be the victim and use society against their target. Michiru had enough nets to keep the bloodsuckers off of her. Still, she could easily pluck a fly from the air with none the wiser.

But why be a mountain? A fly? She would erode the mountain and drown the fly.

And the tide went out…

Michiru slid herself effortlessly between a rock and a hard place, halting the argument in place. She pressed her body against her lover as if everything was still the party it had been. Still she kept her one leg bent behind her to show the stiletto’s warning to the other one.

“Haruka, darling, they’re about to bring out the cake, and everyone is wondering where you went.”

Lowering her voice she said, “Also Aino has already found her way onto one of the tables and is refusing assistance.” She gently touched Haruka’s arm. “I fear you’re the only one who can get her down safely.” Haruka took one last moment to glare at Seiya before nodding and heading back to the group’s table. For all of her anger, her hand was ever soft in Michiru’s grasp. As soon as Haruka was far enough gone, she heard a voice behind her.

“Excuse me Miss Kaioh, I didn’t mean—”

The tide roared back to the shore.

“Of course you did.” She turned and caught Seiya’s eyes. “You are a scared and lost little pup in the wake of your master’s disappearance.” Seiya tried to cut her off, but there was no stopping the cascading words. “Yes, it must feel good to goad others into fights. You can work off your tension and still come out the moral victor.”

Seiya didn’t say anything, but remained where she was.

“Even better if you can challenge your way into a new pack. A new master, new orders, you wouldn’t have to expend so much energy on thinking.”

Never dropping her gaze, Michiru came closer and placed her hand on the other girl’s shoulder. Whispering into her ear, “But how does it feel to know you will never woo the girl you think you love? With every fight you claim in her name, the more she will turn from you in disgust. You will never be her knight—you are not even fit to be her dog.” She dug her finely manicured nails into the girl’s shoulder and let go.

“Now be off. I’ve been planning Haruka’s party for months, and she will enjoy it.”

The sea released her and strode away, never looking back. Maybe she was allowed to breathe for a bit, but Seiya wasn’t sure if she was free from drowning.