#bill’s dad sends a card that literally just says ‘to bill— good luck. from albert’ with a little money attached

[irregularbillcipher]

mentioned this a while ago on twitter but in any au where bill and kryptos are like, normal humans, kryptos sort of manipulates bill a little into actually having a wedding by being like “you know it would piss our families off sooo bad to hear we got married. my dad might have a stroke. your mom would probably never talk to you again” and bill’s desire to piss off their respective parents and the chance to have the wildest, most batshit reception JUST wins out over general disdain for marriage and fear of accidentally showing a smidge of actual genuine affection for kryptos in front of people. the kryptos and cipher family homes both get the world’s most aggressive, flashy invitations telling them that their sons are getting married, that they are absolutely not invited and bill and andy would honestly LOVE to see them cause a scene if they try to show their faces anyway. the only location on the “invite” is a p.o. box because they’re not welcome but gifts sure are