#big joooooke

[appri-dot]

HIII I LOVE UR OCS

And I wanted to ask to tell more about Big Joke,,, 👉👈

BIG JOKE!!!!!🎭 alot of her stuff ties into my personal lore hcs abt LC that I don't want to ramble forever about, but I can maybe think up a few lil details!

▪︎The mask is 100% ingrained into its skull, it would be impossible to remove safely and like any good parasite any attempt made by others would cause Joke to get hella aggressive

▪︎Despite being Masked she is not contagious, the way the "disease" spreads is vauge but nomatter how many times it can drench teammates in blood they are okay (not mentally)

▪︎After being masked there was efforts to get rid of it but BigJoke was the TANK of the crew, the few that had pushed her buttons literally got their heads crushed, it was horrific (especially for Joke when she was out of her haze) and now the general opinion of its crew is LET IT DO WHATEVER IT WANTS

^Doing whatever it wants includes, sabotage, monster eating, people eating, stealing etc. The Mask is utterly chaotic and Its mood is fully dependant on whim impulses

▪︎Currently in the development of her story, BigJoke applied for a new crew after turning her old one to mashed potatoes (semi deserved)- being regrouped with an unfortunate crew where Benji is! The two have incredible drama especially when the little guy thinks he can talk down to a lady almost twice his size. Lemmy may also be there, just a gang of broken entities trying to reach that quota!

[dozing-marshmallow]

GETTING A DOG WITH CHRIS MCLEAN HEADCANONS

The house was empty with just you and Chris.

And you were a long way from having children with him.

So, you asked him something that wasn’t as demanding as children, but all the more loveable.

At first, he refused,“We already have enough pets in our backyard, (Y/N)!”

He means those wild animals...?,“Those aren’t pets, Chris... They don’t live with us and they can look after themselves.”

“Oh, so you want a feeble animal to depend on you like the sick freak you are?”

When he said it like that...

“Joooooking! It’s a joke, don’t be sad!” he pets your head,“Let’s go get ourselves a dog.”

A dog? But he’s already owned three in the past. Why not get a kitty instead?

“Eh. I’d prefer to get an animal that likes me.” what a flawed answer.

“Chris, cats do like their owners.” you explained, doodling the head of a cat on his hand with a marker,“Just because they’re reserved, it doesn’t mean they hate you.”

He begged to differ,“Mhm. Walking away whenever I try pet them is love, yeah? No thanks. Dogs don’t have a social battery, much like me, and they all love me. They don’t just sleep around all day, they want to spend time with me.”

Okay then.

You make it to the pet store with him, taking longer than you guys thought it would to actually look at the dogs.

After all, the store had tarantulas, snakes, fishes.

Things you saw most of the time on the island, but looking so different seeing them in a tank.

“Aw, Chris... Look at this Turkish Angora.” you cooed at the pretty kitty at one point, who stared up at you with captivating blue eyes.

He takes one look at the white furry face,“Meh.”

“You just wanna look at dog pens?”

“Duh.” he responds condescendingly, frown twitching at you being the one wasting time.

“Alright.” you scoff, going ahead,“Don’t look me like you weren’t gawking at that axolotl for fifteen minutes.”

“They’re cute!” he tried to justify, catching up to you.

You finally get to the dogs, this aisle naturally being the loudest part of the pet store with their barking and playing.

“There’s so many choices!” you exclaim, leaping from one stall to the other,“Shih tzus, western terriers, beagles, dachshunds! Ah! They have everything here! I wish I could take all of them home!”

“And have my house smelly and scruffy? No thanks.” Chris sneers, no compassionate thought spared towards any of the breeds you mentioned,“Let’s just find one already.”

One of them will melt him,“Look at the chihuahuas here!”

“Hmm...” he peers down at the bundle of the tinier dogs, yipping at him, haven’t touching his interest.

“What’s with that look? Chriiiis.” you knew what could be going through his head,“Chihuahuas aren’t as bad as the media makes them out to be!”

“It’s not that...” his voice creeps with uncertainty,“They’re just...well...permanently small, aren’t they?”

“You mean you wanna get a big dog?” you twist your head to the end of the corridor, seeing there were quite a number of pens you have yet to look at,“There should be some down there!”

And there were! “Now we’re talking!” Chris eventually approves, watching the batch of huskies.

“They’re very beautiful... Though I was hoping I could pick up the dog.” you had every right to estimate that. These dogs were probably taller than you if they stood on their hind legs.

“Tough luck, dogs aren’t made to be carried.” Chris scornfully responds to your dream, before sighing,“If it means that much to you, I suppose we can get one as a baby... Hm...”

He had difficulty picking. You were fine with any breed, so you proposed to him,“How about I go buy the dog essentials while you pick the one you want?”

“Really?” there was this paw of gratitude that glittered his eye for a second, before he bashed it away with an egoistical,“I mean yeah sure, whatever, I know the one I’ll pick is gonna be right anyway. See you in a bit.”

You internally grieve from the way these dogs you met earlier looked at you as you walked past them. How long will these precious animals need to wait for the perfect family to take them home? The one... Such a shame he stuck to his word this time.

Whether Chris wanted to or not, you were definitely going to personally put some more money towards animal shelters.

By the time you were done paying and had carrier bags of dog treats, bowls, a bed, and toys, you set off on your journey back to the dog aisle to reunite with Chris, just for it to be completed halfway through as he had thought the same, newly sporting something in his hand too: a lead attached to a picturesque polar bear like dog next to him, with its tongue hanging out in a smile.

“I decided to get the Samoyed.” he grinned,“I was stuck between that or the German shepherd, but then I thought, why not get something new?”

“Aw...!” you bend down to pet the dog’s fur, the Samoyed, who was very welcoming, even cocking its head to invite you into doing so. The vanilla strands of its body fluffed in mighty submission under your hand, feeling too heavenly to be tangible,“Such a pretty dog! Is it a male or female, and did you give it a name yet?” you didn’t hear your voice pitching higher.

“It’s a boy dog, and no, I haven’t figured out a name yet, which is weird, since I am fantastic at those.” his tone too mystified at his current lack of creativity.

A random suggestion popped into mind after looking into the eyes of the big dog, noticing his being very similar to Chris’,“How about Lavender?”

“Lavender? Seriously? I can’t imagine calling him that! He’s not even purple! It makes no sense!” Chris criticised immediately.

Sheesh, you didn’t think it that bad of a name,“Alright then, what were some that you had?” you asked, straightening your legs back up.

“Snow orrr Snowball.”

“...”

“...Lavender, it is.”

Perfectly timed, Lavender let out a howl, sugaring Chris’ lemon mouth into stroking him with adoration.

“Aw!” he was back in the shoes of his fans,“I love this dog!”

Who couldn’t? He hadn’t been with Chris for a whole day and his person had already changed. Dogs... Purer than man could ever be.

[comepraisetheinfanta]

Ahahahahaha omfg my nephew’s first birthday is on erev yom kippur/yom kippur.

I’m hoping my mom and sister don’t plan anything that day and if they do I hope it’s before nightfall because otherwise it’s going to be harder to fast covertly and it’ll probably blow my chances of going to the Kol Nidrei service

[coyging]

https://twitter.com/PlayboiLeb/status/1546283650936963078?t=cFJj1C9lxr6xDpHDd5KnWA&s=19

yeah, yeah my roty !

[spiciestmarinara]

I'm way more angry about the Pew*dî*pie thing because everyone whose going "it's just a joke" forget how history work. Cartoonish portrayals with big noses, the "money hungry Jew", and so many popular "jokes" dehuminizes us and with all the VERY REAL NAZIS coming back to the forefront, he should have known better. And with the age demographic of his audience, he's showing kids "hey it's ok to say Jewish people should die because its just a joooooke (: like cartman on south park -you know- who has dressed up like Hitler in his own canon. CoMeDy~!"

[appri-dot]

Big joooooke