#big exam tomorrow
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after 1800+ hours of studying, here we come
#I would appreciate all your thoughts or prayers or good lucks#big exam tomorrow#about me#med school#residency here i come
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Yo me voy, wish me luck folks
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Day 178 is a sketchy day!
#mcyt#grian#grian fanart#hermitblr#i'm kinda loosing inspiration and it is very sad#also tomorrow I'm having an exam so I'm kinda nervous#I shall do big art very soon.......
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how it feels to have the afternoon free to draw characters having nightmares
#greek exam of tomorrow cancelled the prof is sick i have time later in the week to finish my notes i did my workout...... life is good#neigh (blabbers)#are you ready to suffer at your big age of 20 kaspar khan kain
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quick colored in sketch page before the finale tonight
if they don’t end up happy i’m going to get violent.
#dimension 20#mentopolis#d20#d20 mentopolis#stacy fakename#fanny fawnsworth#anastasia tension#i cant watch the finale tonight cause i have this big exam tomorrow that i need to study for#as soon as that’s over i will be finishing my 4000 sketches of the prefrontal p.i.s
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Belleview Chapter Two (Part C): River
Notes: mostly low-level med whump
Belleview: Chapter 1, Chapter 2 (Part A), Chapter 2 (Part B)
TW: Institutionalized slavery, Med Whump, Med Exam, References to Noncon, Noncon touch, Dubcon Medical Care, References to Human Experimentation
✥ ✥ ✥
River London proves, immediately, to be more of a challenge.
River, in nearly poetic contrast to Felix, has been described as being filled with fiery hatred and anger and, reportedly, does little to hide this. Lincoln has prepared himself for the worst, but has his doubts about what he will find.
Still, it takes Lincoln a fair amount of hyping himself up before he pushes the door open, and when he does, he is met not by the enraged, violent man described over and over and over on paper, but a pale, skinny boy who doesn’t even acknowledge his presence, much less attack.
River sits on the floor, curled into the corner, his head resting against the tiled wall. His room is devoid of any items at all. Lincoln recalls accounts of daily disciplinary measures that have been taken over the past couple years, including the removal of his bed, his clothes, the bedside table, and all objects that can be used to act in defiance of the handlers.
River’s file was… different, from anything Lincoln had expected to see in a place like this. Considered hostile by all the former handlers and medical staff at Belleview, River had made something of a name for himself in his persistent and unyielding defiance. Over and over, there were notes of aggression, there were incident reports, there were handlers with broken bones, with cuts or scrapes or bites. They were specific in their approach to River, using precautions in all interactions with him. Lincoln had read through the disciplinary notes and a slew of other documents warily, his stomach dropping further with each new file, and ultimately accepted that the likelihood of River being cooperative was slim.
River’s arms are wrapped tightly around his legs, and Lincoln takes a moment to orient himself to as much of River’s physical condition as he can from this distance. River, like the rest of them, appears to be considerably underweight. He has fewer visible scars on his back, but there is bruising that peeks out from under the collar. His breaths are even enough, maybe a little shallow. He shifts, burying his head into the space between his knees and covers his ears. Alright, then.
Lincoln clears his throat but keeps his distance and crouches down to eye level. He stays aware of his exit because, while River doesn’t necessarily incite fear in his current state, his history of assaulting handlers has given Lincoln a healthy sense of caution.
“River?” Lincoln tries. There is no response. “I’m Lincoln. Prescott,” he continues. The only obvious sign that he is being heard at all is River, not subtly, pressing the heels of his hands into his ears. So he launches into his speech, watching for any obvious signs of distress, although he finds none.
Clinically, River is in a much better position than Felix was, but Lincoln feels ill-prepared to address River’s condition. He swallows and stands, setting his phone, his keys, the tablet and folder on the floor by the door before making a slow approach. He has prepared himself for, at worst, aggression, but at the very best, a verbal undressing. He has a three-point list for today, and does not intend to push River beyond what he can handle. Step one is… to the extent that he can complete it, completed. Introduce himself. Get the information to River.
Step two: Get the collar off of him.
Lincoln points to his neck and says, as neutrally as he can, “Can I take the collar off?”
River doesn’t respond, but he pulls his knees in tighter and lifts his head, his gaze burning into the wall. Once within arm’s reach of him, Lincoln sits back on his heels, showing River his hands.
“The clip has already been deactivated,” he says softly. “It is not anyone’s intent, nor is it legal, to reactivate it.” He notices a muscle in River’s jaw tighten but, given that River has been fairly passive so far, he continues carefully. “I need to find the physical release mechanism,” he explains as he points to River’s neck. “It’s located, I believe, on the opposite side as the… as the metal plates. I was asked to master this skill, if nothing else, over the last few weeks. It takes a little bit of finessing, but I promise it won’t hurt.” River does not outwardly acknowledge Lincoln has spoken, but his body language is as clear as it can be - he’s not comfortable with this, he does not want Lincoln near him. “I’ll go as quickly as I can,” Lincoln says, “but I will need to touch your neck, okay?”
River, unsurprisingly, does not offer an opinion one way or another, so Lincoln leans forward, keeping his movements as obvious as he can. The moment he’s within reach, though, River jerks away.
“It’s alright,” Lincoln says. “I’m going to take it off. Then we’ll talk through what’s next.” In an instant, River goes rigid as he curls up tighter, and he holds his breath. In hindsight, Lincoln can see where he went wrong, but his focus is singularly on having any type of success with River that he doesn’t clock what’s about to happen until it’s too late. River does not look as Lincoln’s fingers experimentally brush against his skin, but he also does not immediately pull away. This close, Lincoln can feel the barely-contained tension in River’s muscles. He moves quickly to find the release, but not quickly enough, and within a split second, River throws his elbow back into Lincoln’s stomach with considerable force. The impact is both painful and unexpected, and, with murder in his eyes, River scrambles as far away as the small space will allow.
It takes Lincoln a moment to catch his breath, and another to assess if he’s broken anything, but he hasn’t, and so he turns his attention back to River.
River’s hands move to his neck, partly cradling it and partly grasping the collar, and he’s about as small as he can get. He’s prepared for retaliation, steeling himself against the inevitable shock that he knows is coming.
“Ow,” Lincoln says as he rights himself.
He takes a deep, experimental breath, and second guesses whether River did, in fact, break something, before he notices that River is… the anger is still there, but it’s overshadowed by how tightly he grips onto the band of the collar.
“Okay,” Lincoln says. “I may have had that coming.” He takes another breath, which aches less than the first, a good sign. “You can try it yourself?” He takes a step back. “There’s a small plastic piece at the back that you can push up, which will expose the connection point. If you push in on the raised side while sliding it down and to the left, it should free itself, okay?”
Lincoln isn’t certain where his biggest error was, but from there, his three-point list goes up in flames. In an effort to reduce the likelihood of additional altercations, he doesn't immediately re-engage River, but rather keeps a distance, affording River enough personal space that he, god willing, does not feel threatened. For his part, River remains openly, but with a respectable stability, hostile. There's no chance that Lincoln will have success at getting his vitals, because that involves touching him, and it's been made, rather painfully, clear that that is currently off the table.
While it’s very clear that River is suffering, short of calling in support to restrain him so that Lincoln can get closer, there is no chance of Lincoln identifying the specific sources of that suffering beyond using his imagination (which, by Lincoln's own calculations, has already had more than enough play).
He tries his hand at questioning River from afar, and when that doesn’t work, he regroups again, and tries to just talk through the new circumstances.
He’s met with a soft but venomous, “Go fuck yourself,” when he tells him, eventually, that he only wants to help.
Lincoln spends nearly an hour with River, pushing him as much as he can, which is, unfortunately, not particularly far. Objectively, he admits that he may in fact have lost ground over the last hour. He certainly hasn't gained any. He changes his tactic once more, and, accepting for River’s refusal to cooperate, he settles into the far corner of River's room and leans against the wall, resigned by the fact that this has gone about as poorly as it could have gone, short of any serious bodily injury.
A soft knocking draws his attention away.
“We’re done triaging,” one of the volunteers– Doug Richmond, Lincoln corrects himself– says. “Dr. Francis asked me to find you.” Lincoln nods and stands, careful as he makes his way to the door to give River a wide berth.
Lincoln pauses near the exit and turns back. “Please try to eat,” he says gently. “We’ll have a bed ready for you in the next hour or so. You have free access to the bathroom if you’d like to take a shower. Volunteers will be in and out today getting you anything you need. Please,” he whispers. “River.”
At the mention of his name, River flinches, but his gaze doesn’t shift from the floor.
“If you need anything, let me, or any of the volunteers, know, and you will have it.” Lincoln straightens his back, inhaling a slow, deep breath. “I just,” he starts, but falters, searching for the right words. The blame here, he knows, lies squarely on the shoulders of the people who have hurt him. There are no right words. Nothing makes this better. They can only move forward, in baby steps, and hope that it’s enough. “I just want to make sure you’re not in any pain.” His voice is low, but he knows that River hears him. “Anything beyond that, we can deal with when you are ready. If you are in any pain,” he says, the memory of River’s file feeling fresher by the minute. “Just… if you let me know, I can help. You do not need to suffer through this.”
River turns his head toward Lincoln, dark eyes burning with anger. He opens his mouth, and Lincoln thinks he might tell him anything, but instead, he whispers, “Leave me alone,” and buries his head once more.
Lincoln nods and makes a quiet exit, but leaves the door ajar.
To Richmond, he says softly, “Get him set up with water and a few food options. If he'll let you, please get him a bed. If not, leave it alone for now. If he indicates he needs anything else, come find me.” He pauses, and they both stare at the half-open door. “Give him space, though,” Lincoln continues, his voice as low as he can make it. “He has a history of aggression toward handlers, and I don’t doubt he will apply the same strategies to us if threatened. He doesn’t need to speak or eat or get dressed or shower. The collar can stay on. Just try to…"
It is difficult to convey how deeply protective Lincoln suddenly feels of this boy who he has known for all of an hour and who, by all metrics, loathes him, while also not coming off as a completely sanctimonious prick. "Just be careful with him,” he finishes lamely, before glancing back at the door.
He knows this team, selected specifically for their ability to handle this, will approach River cautiously and will not back him into corners and will, ultimately, put his comfort above anything else. But still, as he forcibly turns away and walks down the corridor, he cannot shake the feeling of increasing sadness that winds its way through him.
✥ ✥ ✥
Belleview Taglist:
@pigeonwhumps @peachy-panic @whump-cravings @pirefyrelight @i-eat-worlds
@taterswhump @squishablesunbeam @inpainandsuffering @distinctlywhumpthing @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi
@handsinmotion @whumps-and-bumps @pumpkin-spice-whump @alexmundaythrufriday @itsawhumpsideblog
#Institutionalized slavery#Med Whump#Med Exam#References to Noncon#Noncon touch#Dubcon Medical Care#References to Human Experimentation#furthermore#there is in fact one more part to chapter four#and i broke it off too and im sorry for that but i will post it today or tomorrow#its a big old chapter two#for why idk#the good news is i think after chapter two the major set up stuff will be done#and we can get into#the other stuff
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I have one more exam for my history class and it'll be what determines if I keep my 4.0 gpa or not. To put it simply, I'm just a bit stressed
#Don't get me wrong I'm thankful to have high gpa at all#I'm just a big perfectionist and I really wanna keep it#my class is currently at a 90% and I only have one grade left for it#so if it drops to below a 90% my gpa will drop too#I really need to get a 95%-100% on this next exam#which means I can only get 1 answer wrong or none at all#I could take it right now but I've already taken 2 exams today so I'm taking a break#I'll take it tomorrow#teenage mutant ninja turtles#school stuff#➼ Artworks#➼ From the cage#➼ Blue turtle inner workings
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sort of medieval AU in which you don't ascend to the throne by birthright but because you've proven yourself. Daniel had been on the way to become king but then Max had arrived and taken his place. Now Max is king and Daniel is the knight closest to him, made confidant, protector and lover.
After a tourney in which Daniel competed and Max did not, Max helps him take off his armor, piece by piece, gently helping him bathe afterwards.
#putting this here because i AM going to write this. maybe. probably not.#but i am thinking really hard about it!!!!!#im just busy today with the race and stuff and i have a really big exam tomorrow i'm gonna fail :/#if this still lives in my brain either later today or on tuesday i'll write it#but if i post this maybe i'll hold myself accountable better!#i've just been hit with this out of nowhere#anyway#maxiel#my writing
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it's almost time
#i have an exam tomorrow#all im gonna be able to think about is them#destiel#spn#supernatural#the big day#november 5th#nov 5th#im gonna go insane
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Built like an ai yazawa character
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Splatoon au ⁉️⁉️
An au based on if all the idols (Squid Sisters, Off the Hook and Deep Cut) arent idols, then what would they do?
Just a silly silly idea that popped up (reminder that besides Pearlina the others will probably be ooc since I don’t know em well)
I’ll only draw Marina and Pearl since (probably)
Apologies for the shitty pic but
Marina! (25 yrs old) (as of Splatoon 3)
She works as a rave DJ with her partner DJ Sango (Cap’n 3). For Marina, I made it so that she (18) and 8 were going through octo expansion together, which I guess made her Agent 7/9 for a while? She lived with the Agent 3 & 8 for a while before eventually moving out when hers and 3 were making good money. She met Pearl when she was at a bar which also was holding Pearl’s concert (?) then started dating like a year later lolz
For Pearl (28 yrs old)
Pearl is a supermodel who models for Enperry, her dad’s company. While modelling is her main job, she plays in a band as a side gig. Surprisingly to her, her band got popular and started selling more copies of their albums. Eventually people knew Pearl for both her her modelling and voice. Currently, she plays in her band more than modelling , only doing so when her dad practically begs her to.
So yeag….. for The Squid Sisters they do make music but they never really did the whole Inkopolis News thing. Their music is popular but they didnt do more than that, rather they worked on The NSS more.
For Deep Cut, they continued on being bandits who found this funky little kid (Neo) and their brother(lil buddy). They did bandit stuff together until some old man pulled them in for agent work (all of em lmao)
That’s it lolz, I may add more tho (like refs…) but I just wanted to get this out there
#splatoon#splatoon fanart#marina ida#pearl houzuki#pearlina#pearl splatoon#marina splatoon#marie splatoon#callie splatoon#splatoon au#doodle#au rant#omg it’s 1am bruv I got exams tomorrow wtf#hoping that I draw proper refs for all idols and maybe the agents if I feel like it 🙏#would you believe me if I said that a maxley tiktok inspired me to make this au#it was about snakebites on max#made me think about snakebites on Pearl#then wowzers au idea popped out#oughhhhgggg….. I gotta draw that now..#snakebites on pearl houzuki….#I think I havud covib…..#deep cut#shiver splatoon#frye splatoon#big man splatoon#I forgot to tag deep cut lolz
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im not ashamed to say i check ur blog religiously, so I hope ur okay and sending good vibes! thank you for being a blog that always brings a spark of joy to my day xx
beautiful anons, this was so nice of both of you, and your messages made me smile so much when I saw them 🤍 i'm BACK and I'll be back to tagging every post on this website as galex in approximately .2 seconds 🫡
#everything was fine i just had a big exam that i needed to study for!#and i've literally booked off tomorrow just to lay in bed all day and catch up on tumblr#kay asks
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lewis saying in the press conference that the car has improved a lot which could mean
1. after racing the car on hot ones pr got his ass orrr
2. WE ARE BACK BABY LEWIS P1 IN CANADA AGAIN WOHOO (also mainly bc it‘s supposed to rain)
#i am tired i have an exam tomorrow i haven‘t studied for so the delusions are big here#please please please please#i know they‘re saying this every weekend and then we get nothing#but i‘d really love to see him win with merc at least one last time#lewis hamilton#f1#formula one#formula 1#mercedes amg petronas#canada grand prix 2024#montreal grand prix 2024#press conference
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everybody say a hail mary for me as i finish up finals okay?🩷
#sunspeak#no exams i just have a bunch of assignments to finish up before thursday at 4PM#and a big creative writing project due tomorrow eep
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ok I'm closing up our little radio show for tonight! Thank you guys for being understanding when I need breaks and stuff <3
#im gonna be really busy tomorrow so i can't promise being super active tbh#ive got another big exam and a 3.5 hour chem lab ughhhhh
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i'm so sorry about what you're going through!! i know what it's like to be a "gifted" kid and suddenly not be able to pass everything so easily, it's a pretty terrible feeling (◞‸◟;)
i sincerely hope you get through this, i have no doubt it will all work out in the end, so please take care!! <2
Thank you for your support, definitely need it right now (;ŏ﹏ŏ)
It's not technically the worst case scenario since I still have some time before the semester ends, but I still definitely need to learn how to cope with so much more to handle (and also how to deal with failure/rejection)
I'm going to try to discuss with a professor or advisor, but I can only go from there >.<
Thanks again for being here :-)
#🩹#📎#💬#It's not fun failing since it makes you feel stupid in the end#But i think it's partly my fault since I'm taking 4 classes when i know how much i work#At least if i do end up failing i might be able to retake the class#It'd just be a massive pain considering just how much effort i tore from myself to put into this class#I have another big exam tomorrow actually#2 major exams only 1 month into school this math class is truly horrid#but finally having others to discuss it with helps a ton#IRL i don't have anyone i can talk about it with#I love my blog :-)#my friends ♡
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