#bi people are still bi. doesnt matter if theyre in a same sex relationship or not. theyre still bi!

[shadowscommand]

@cerosin-bis asked for Krueger, Wyatt, and griggs !! trifecta of fucked up, fucked up, and normal (but spicy abt it) got a little long so its under a readmore!

kroog:

He literally killed his parents. he had a good few reasons (money/bc he could) but the main thing is he wanted them gone so he killed them

he genuinely really likes camping and being outdoors. but he also really likes to be on his phone. but the phone does not have fellow outdoorsmen he can stalk and scare. also the rivers contain free knives he can dig out sometimes

i like that he has a puppy 🥺 idk that hes really a guy that should have a dog but also he would be so happy taking it on walks. letting it scare people. having it chase people down so he can kill them.

he feels lukewarm to cool no matter the actual temperature of where he is, unless its literally freezing or the midday desert hot. he hates being hot the Most it makes him really agitated (really very bad.)

 horrible sleep. horrible. he sleeps maybe four hours of the day at most. but it doesnt stress him out, it doesnt bother him he’s just too amped up most days to sleep. he doesnt wake up bc of nightmares either he just wakes up bc its time to wake up. literally “You sleep rather soundly for a murderer” thats him. he does sleep rather soundly

REALLY into getting people psychosexually obsessed w him. he loves to play games at all times constantly bc it keeps his mind active and he loves to be on Edge. he will not let people go either until they either kill him or he gets bored (very rare.)

wyatt:

wyatt is like.. casually suicidal? he doesnt want to die. but hes totally cool with it if he does, bc hes at the peak of his life rn (getting to blow things up)

horrible knees. horrible. he has like 5 different knee braces and he genuinely needs them. they ache in the cold

professional ghoster. commitment is nothing wyatt is interested in and if you catch feelings and he can tell he will straight up stop talking to you. he doesnt like relationship games

he does really really like to neg people tho. he likes fucking w people w bitchy attitudes bc they’re the easiest to agitate. he just thinks semi-angry sex is the best.

energy drink aficionado. he really likes the fruity ones but also plain energy drink flavor bc he likes to be Awake, hes another constantly on edge person. adrenaline junkie

no one can figure out why hes Like the way he is hes just built that way naturally. hes likes to fuck and fight this is literally him

griggs (applies for both og and reboot):

GRIGGS I LOVE GRIGGS 🥺🥺

 my most prized griggs headcanon is he was raised by his grandparents after his mother willingly gave him up. theyre all good now but he did grow up a very mature child bc of this.

class president. football. did a lot of extracurricular activities bc hes a tryhard

single, but hes honestly happy w it. he likes his personal space his personal time. sometimes he sleeps w gaz.

hes the designated driver for demon dogs on all casual excursions. he doesnt control the music they play (raines does that) but he is the one who controls the volume (usually loud). he likes fun, older music, imo sunny by boney m. is his favorite song.

aside from being a tryhard he also really likes to be someone other marines look up to. he really likes being the center of attention but unlike SOME people (price) he genuinely tries to do some good with the limelight. he wants to be a positive, strong influence for people. if he wasnt a marine he would be a high school teacher. please griggs there is still time do not die in mw22 🙏

reboot him and og him are basically the same but i think og griggs is a little younger. him and gaz still fuck around.

[murkyles]

whenever i go back on my regular dash or twt homepage, i see all my fellow lesbians and also bi women who are p smart and articulate and know that pansexuality and demisexuality and other mogai labels are all dumb and homophobic/biphobic, and theyll talk about how much they love women and speak out about bullshit like “lesbians can like men” and that bi-lesbian nonsense.

…and yet theyre all nonbinary. and super tra libfem. and i just wonder. are they close to peaking? are they on the edge, just like i was? will they take the steps to learn or will they plug their ears just like i used to until i couldnt anymore?

bc when i was a nonbinary lesbian tra libfem i was terrified of being a radfem. i literally google searched on a private safari tab, with my vpn on, “im scared im becoming a terf” bc i stumbled into a terf blog when going on a blocking spree and found post after post after post of arguments i agreed with on a level so deep it scared me. i would argue with myself in the car or the shower where i felt nobody could hear me and talk about how ridiculous it is that liberals would defend porn and rapist mindsets only bc it was what radfems were arguing AGAINST and what trans people were arguing FOR. and i could see the cracks beginning to show but for so long i just tried to convince myself im an idiot and other people, especially trans women, know more than me, despite my literal experience with being a lesbian and a woman in the real world. ive been used by bi and het women against my will to turn men on, ive been told that i just need to date more men and find a good one by my mother, ive been sexually harassed by trans women, and i had to listen to men at college joke about how they think lesbians are a fun little challenge— and none of these im allowed to talk about bc im a dumb crazy afab nonbinary lesbian who doesnt know anything about real oppression.

i would feel like a horrible person and a bigot and a fake lesbian for NOT being attracted to trans women, and the same when i WOULD be attracted to trans men. i could never stop that niggling feeling that im a horrible person bc i still knew people’s sex and would or wouldnt feel attraction to the “wrong” gender. i would start feeling deep-seated repulsion at the thought of having sex with a male, no matter what they identified as or even how they looked aesthetically with clothes and makeup. i sat here, hating myself, bc i could not help but feel violated when people told other lesbians to get over our “vagina fetish.” when i would draw lesbian erotica for myself, i was terrified someone would point out how there arent any trans women, and that i was just fetishizing female bodies. this voyeuristic view of myself out of fear was leftover from my christian upbringing and it worsened in trans spaces exponentially.

i would try to still defend trans people in my little car or shower arguments with myself and still try to talk about sex based oppression, the terror of porn and the sex industry, and i kept coming to the same conclusion. the only people who actually care about women and lesbians and actual feminism... are radfems.

i can see that these friends have so SO many of the same opinions just like i did and still do, like the ridiculousness of “opting” into oppression by identifying into it in terms of sexuality, the way lesbians especially have to defend ourselves against everyone bc nobody gives a shit about us or our oppression based on the intersection of misogyny and homophobia, and how porn and kinks and “proshippers” are destroying people’s and especially children’s perceptions of sex and relationships. theyre exactly where i was. and i keep wondering if theyre as terrified of realizing terfs are right and deluding themselves too?

when are the rest of us lesbians and bi women who’ve been brainwashed and beaten into submission with all these goddamn lies and manipulation gonna wake up? if we’re so scared to realize its all a lie and that “becoming the enemy” is the worst thing we could possibly do, akin to becoming fascists (?????) will we ever stop and think thats whats keeping us in the dark?

[armillary-spheres-lover]

Hey

Idk if you ever got the answer to your thing. But I’m a person who is queer but regularly uses the term lesbian to make things simpler. I can tell you why I hate the phrase monosexual- it feels transphobic to me- I am not attracted to men at all, but I am attracted to women, non-binary folks, gender queer folks, and agender folks. If I was with a partner and they transitioned to be a man I would still love them. That wouldn’t change. Sexuality is fluid and calling someone monosexual seems to erase that and really put people in boxes. Everyone has exceptions. And as someone who has identified as bisexual and pansexual in the past and find those not to suit me and fit right (especially since I am not sexually/romantically attracted to people physically/based on appearances- it’s more about personality and what I could do with a person)

I don’t mean this in an antagonistic way, I really hope it doesn’t come off that way(I’m bad expressing myself sorry).

(I’m sorry, I know you’re not trying to be rude. My answer, however, will sound rude and upset because you touched upon some stuff that needs a lot of unpacking to me lmao. Just know this anger is not necessarily directed at you but at biphobia in general.)

Why do bisexual people may need to use the term monosexual?

A. It is descriptive

I see what you mean but as you said you're queer and lesbian is a term to make things simpler, right?

So I wouldnt call you monosexual because you’re clearly not attracted to only one gender (but if you want to who I am to stop you?). Monosexual is someone who is almost exclusively dating/is attracted to people of one gender. There are plenty trans people that are straight or gay that would NOT date a partner if they realized they were a different gender. For real: kat blaque made a video (here it is if youre interested) on youtube about this - she’s trans and she wants to date men and wouldnt feel comfortable on continuing dating if a partner of hers realized they were actually a trans woman all along. She wants to date guys not girls and that's FINE it just means A. She actually recognizes the girl gender, obviously B. She's straight af and that's wonderful! It’s not a box if that’s how her experience is and she likes it that way!

Also how is being monosexual transphobic? Cant a girl just like guys exclusively (both cis and trans) or like girls exclusively (both cis and trans)? It's not even enbyphobic since you dont need to be attracted to a person to support their rights. (Gay men arent attracted to women but can be 100% feminists.) Being open to fuck somebody is not the same as supporting their rights: fetishization is a thing. Again, I refer to the video Kat Blaque made.

Sexuality IS fluid but to some people (like me and you) it is more than others. Some people don’t feel comfortable dating people that dont fall into the gender theyre usually attracted to and thats 100% okay.

B. It helps in talking about biphobia and panphobia in society

Biphobia and panphobia are for the large part based on the assumption that you cant be attracted to more than one gender (not even non-binary and so on) and that if you do you're weird/disgusting/mentally ill/a sexual predator. I can tell you 100% that's the narrative both straight and gay people can and may perpetuate since I struggle w this kind of shit every single time Im attracted to someone no matter their gender (YES, EVEN IF THEY'RE A GUY, BECAUSE THE OTHER DAY I WAS ATTRACTED TO A GIRL AND NOW I FEEL LIKE A FUCKING ANIMAL THAT CANT CONTROL ITSELF, even though it makes NO sense because if it was two girls or two boys the actual number of people my hormones activated to wouldnt change, but it would make my experience not subjected to biphobia!). I’m not saying gay people are the same as straight people. But I do feel alienated BOTH from heteronormative society AND from (subtly biphobic) gay spaces because of my bisexuality. I costantly feel like I’m outside both of those worlds and you know how humans are: I just need a term to encompass it all easily, to say “I don’t identify with any of this” (which is both straight and strictly gay spaces: ie, monosexual). To me is literally the same as saying non-bisexual/non-pansexual.

I dont mean to say lesbians or gays have it easier or are just like straight people. But we do have different experiences and I need terms to express that. It honestly doesnt matter to me if you identify as lesbian or queer (though I think you’re implying you’re more queer than anything). But I do need a term to talk about how society at large treats sexuality; ie, as a monosexual thing. Another concept that’s been thrown around is bi erasure. A strictly monosexual society is bound to view a girl dating a girl (or girl presenting) as if theyre both LESBIANS and erase a queer person the moment they’re in a m/f relationship, because people cant COMPUTE that it may not be the case and that the girl dating a cis straight dude isnt betraying her queerness.To think so is basic biphobia.

In some ways, I think it’s the same as when transgender people started using the term cisgender - which is applicable to both straight people and queer/gay people. They simply needed a term which meant “not-trans” as they were saying “I dont identify with this” (ie the cisgender experience). Does it imply that cisgender people, no matter if queer, have something in common? Yeah, yeah it does. Does it imply that queer people are just the same as straight people, or face no oppression? Of course not. Seeing people being offended upon being called monosexual feels like people being offended upon being called cis to me.

Also, saying that the terms bisexual people use are transphobic is almost implying that bisexuality is inherently transphobic? Or reeks to me of that kind of rhetoric. I use the terms I need to use, just like any other marginilized group does, and nobody outside of that group has any right of denying me that. It’s like I’m trying to create a safe space for myself and people like me and yall come around to judge us YET AGAIN. And I'm just tired of hearing this bullshit. I could accept this kind of criticism only if it came from a trans person themselves, I guess? But it’s not usually trans people who accuse us of being transphobic, in fact, many trans people identify as bisexual and use bisexual terminology lmfao.

“Hearts not parts” rhetoric

Finally, about personality being superior to physical appearance. That's amazing but I do want to note that, not you necessarily, but many people who are into the “hearts not parts” rhetoric are, how can I say this. Slut-shaming people? I’m not sure if you are doing this but I feel it needs to be said just to be sure. A lesbian trans woman can be just attracted to a girl for her physical appearance and just want to fuck her - and THAT'S OKAY. That's fine. I am a sexually attracted to people and that doesnt mean I have to form a deep bond first. Sex positivity is about accepting that people can feel like this and not shame them for this. "Hearts not parts” rhetoric has in the past infantilized, sanitized or outright shamed other queer experiences. It's fine if you feel that way but dont start acting like you're morally superior because of that. That's catholicism with extra steps. My bisexuality its not the symptom of some predatory and animalistic thing that should be purified into something more palatable and less sexual. That’s the same thing they used to say about gay people and now gay (biphobic) people are using this against us. That’s also the kind of thing trans women (especially if they’re sapphic) constantly hear every fucking day. Queer people have a good part of their discrimination rooted in the shaming of purely sexual desires. Forcing ourselves to be more palatable and less sexual is just respectability politics. I’m tired of it. (This is obviously different from being on the asexual spectrum: but you dont see ace people going around pretending they’re morally superior than everybody else, and many are actually very sex positive)   You would still love your partner if they were a different gender: that’s great, but that’s not how some (most) people feel, and they aren’t superficial because of this, just different from you.

Also, I think you’d really benefit from hearing a trans person say they don’t care if someone has genitalia preferences. Here it is. This obviously doesnt mean that every trans person will feel like she does, but it does mean that we can’t generalize trans experiences/preferences/what they feel transphobia is. Just like straight people dont get to say what’s homophobic or not, cis people dont get to say what’s transphobic or not. The definition of those terms relies entirely on the community that is targeted by these things.

I hope this wasnt excessively confusing but I wanted to make my point clear.

[discyours]

?s on bilesbian post: 1) Yes. 2) Attraction increases or decreases based on getting 2 know some1 better & seeing if theyre more compatible. 3) Yes. &) Womanhood is important to me & my attraction cant be seperated from awareness of heterosexist society, crap roles in het relationships, being a woman, affinity for women. I also cant be unaware of the pressure on lesbians to like dicks, & am not into it, but it doesnt mean i couldnt have some kind of sexual relationship w a trans woman w 1 still.

[You seem to have really thought this out so I want to ask you, respectfully, how you believe people can be attracted to gender identity. You can’t know someone’s gender by looking at them right? Do you not become attracted to people unless you know their gender? If you’re attracted to someone who looks female but find out that they identify as man-aligned, do you suddenly stop being attracted to them? Again I’m not trying to be rude, I’m genuinely curious to know your explanation.]Okay first of all, I appreciate the reply. But I’m gonna be honest here, the term bilesbian seems completely useless to me and actually potentially harmful. It seems like you’re describing exclusive same sex attraction, which for you as a woman is lesbianism no matter what way you want to phrase it. The bi part only comes from also being attracted to females who don’t identify (fully) as women, and an openness to having a relationship with a trans woman despite not being attracted to male sex characteristics. The harm here, in my opinion, is buying into a culture that essentially does not allow monosexuality to exist, that considers it to be unprogressive and continually looks for loopholes to disprove someone as monosexual (almost exclusively done to homosexuals though). It basically implies that attraction only to females/people with female sex characteristics isn’t lesbianism, because they don’t all identify as women, which basically means lesbians don’t exist. 

At the end of the day, progressive views on gender still aren’t going to affect sexuality (which is based on sex/sex characteristics). You can definitely have preferences based on self identification. I’m exclusively attracted to females, and I’ve totally had crushes on pre-everything trans guys before. I wouldn’t date one because someone not identifying as a woman is in itself unattractive to me (plus moral concerns etc etc) but that’s a preference within my sexuality, just like yours is. 

[cerullos]

honestly like if there arent enough examples of cishet aces being gross already just... the discourse surrounding the whole situation makes me feel sick, i literally cannot look at images like the one you just posted without feeling a wave of internalized lesbophobia wash over me like. cishet aces dont even realize what theyre doing with their shitty SAM "just because you like girls and not boys doesnt mean you're gay" rhetoric i want 2 die

yikes, that’s completely understandable (re: your reaction to the chart) and i can totally tag for that kind of stuff going forward if it would help. but yeah theres just…so many reasons this line of thinking is dangerous to closeted gay, bi and pan/ply kids, like first of all if you’re “mostly attracted to the same gender” you can still be bisexual, you can still be a lesbian! you don’t need to be exiled to some nebulous nameless space (that would inevitably fuel internalized biphobia and/or lesbophobia) because you have gender preferences within your bisexuality, or are dealing with compulsive heterosexuality…

and that’s not even scraping the surface of everything under the “attraction types” heading, like…hypersexuality is a legitimate disorder, not a letter on a made-up sexuality spectrum. “experiences no sexual attraction, but willing to do it for other reasons, such as children, pleasing their partners, etc.” makes me want to weep because i remember being in middle school sitting up at night telling myself i had to sleep w/ men no matter how miserable it made me, like if i had this terminology at that very vulnerable point in my life and i could’ve turned around and called myself a “C1″ or whatever the fuck, god knows how much longer i would have been closeted… “homoromantic bisexual” was harmful enough already. 

this is doing so much damage to people who are trying to figure themselves out, and are afraid to refer to themselves as explicitly non-straight. like, you have mogai kids walking around saying “oh i’m not really bi im biromantic asexual” like you can’t be a bisexual ace kid, or a bisexual kid with ANY relationship to sex for that matter, like “bisexual” is inherently a sexual identity? you have mogai kids saying “i’m heteroromantic homosexual” because they can see themselves having sex with girls but can only see themselves having relationships with boys, like you can slap a label on it all you want but thats internalized lesbophobia 

[nomtxas]

answer them all I'm bored

gotcha fam

1:Do you have a crush at the moment? – besides me being in love w k*rl a*zner, grubbie, and burky i dont think i have a crush on anyone (well i guess not what u would call a “crush” i think)

2: Have you ever been deeply in love? – no

3: Longest relationship you’ve ever been in? – almost a month like i think my ex broke up w me a day before our one month (it was back in july so i dont really remember)

4: Have you ever changed for someone? – uhm yeah (god i was such an idiot)

5: How is your relationship with your ex? – non existent like i dont think she likes me very much considering we havent spoken at all since we broke up

6: Have you ever been cheated on? – not that im aware of no

7: Have you ever cheated? – no i would never

8: Would you date someone who’s well known for cheating? – no bc once a cheater always a cheater

9: What’s the most important part of a relationship? – communication like i think people should be honest and open about what they want and what they expect out of the relationship like pls dont tell me ur ok w distance when ur really not, u feel?

10: Do you like to be in serious relationships or just flings? – serious relationships pls i like the thought of being committed to someone

11: When you are dating someone do you believe in going on “breaks”? – i dont have experience w that so i dont know how i feel abt breaks

12: How many people have you ever hooked up with? – none i dont do sex

13: What’s one thing you regret saying/doing in a previous relationship? – getting back together w her after we broke up the first time

14: What age do you think is appropriate for kids to start having sex? – when they’re emotionally mature the consequences of sex and what it involves so maybe 20 and up

15: Do you believe in the phrase “age is just a number”? – sometimes 

16: Do you believe in “love at first sight”? – yep

17: Do you believe it’s possible to fall in love on the internet? – yep ive done it twice (but twice it didnt work out both times so)

18: What do you consider a deal breaker? – dishonesty and not being loyal

19: How do you know it’s time to end a relationship? – i dont know actually which is why i guess i was the one getting dumped

20: Are you currently in a relationship? – no but i want to be

21: Do you think people who have dated can stay friends? – yes absolutely didnt work out that way for me but just bc it didnt for me doesnt mean it wont for others

22: Do you think people should date their friends? – i have mixed feelings on this bc i believe u should be friends w someone to get to know them first before entering a relationship w them so u guys will know what u want and how u are but on the other hand i feel that they shouldnt bc u dont want to ruin a good friendship w messy feelings i guess it’s up to that particular individual 

23: How many relationships have you had? – one

24: Do you think love can last forever? – absolutely look at my grandparents theyve been married for almost 45 years and been together for longer than that so

25: Do you believe love can conquer all things? – eh i dont know

26: Would you break up with someone your parents didn’t approve of? – probably bc even though it gets hard sometimes my moms opinion matters a lot to me

27: If you could go back in time and give yourself one piece of advice about dating what would it be? – DONT GET BACK TOGETHER W HER YA DINGUS IT’S NOT GOING TO WORK OUT AND YOURE JUST GOING TO MAKE URSELF CRY AGAIN

28: Do you think long distance relationships can work? – i think so if the parties involved put in the same amount of effort and it’s not all just one sided 👀👀👀   

29: What do you notice first about another person? – their eyebrows? is that weird

30: Are you straight, bi, gay or pansexual? – polyromantic but i call myself gay all the time bc im attracted to femme presenting people such as myself

31: Would it bother you if your partner suffered from any mental illness? – no absolutely not i feel like i would be supportive and try to hold their hand while they take care of themselves

32: Have you ever been in an abusive relationship? – nope

33: Do you want to get married one day? – yes!

34: What do you think about getting your partner’s name tattooed? – bad karma but if people want to than thats their business

35: Could you be in a relationship without sex? – yep i dont do sex bc im ace (grey ace but still)

36: Are you still a virgin? – yep

37: What’s more important: Looks or personality? – both i think

38: Do you enjoy love films? – yes im a sucker for romantic movies

39: Have you ever given anyone/received roses? – no :(((

40: Have you ever had a valentine? – no 

41: What’s your imagination of a “perfect date”? – a baseball/hockey game and dinner after

42: Have you ever read “Romeo & Juliet”? – high school english was a dark time

43: What’s more important: Your partner or your friends? – both 

44: Would you consider yourself “romantic”? – yep but too bad i dont have anyone to be romantic w :(((((

45: Could you imagine to date one of your current friends? – 👀👀👀   

46: Have you ever been “friendzoned”? – yep but it’s ok

47: Which “famous couple” is your favorite? – the holtbys ok theyre the power couple of the n hl

48: What’s your favorite love song? – life is better with you by michael franti & spearhead it’s so cute 

49: Have you ever broken someone’s heart? – i dont think so i did get this one anon that said i dont care abt people when they do have a crush on me so idk

50: If you’re single, why do you think you are? – bc im ugly and boring

51: Would you rather date someone who’s rich but a douchebag or someone who’s poor but a nice guy? – hows the poor guy gonna take me to sports games? nah im kid but i feel like the second one bc i dont want to date someone whos mean bc i will cry

52: Are you good at giving other people advices regarding dating/ relationships? – nope not at all

53: Are you jealous of couples when you’re single? – yep definitely bc i want to have that too

54: How important is it to make a relationship official (p.e. on Facebook)? – not really

55: Would you consider yourself “clingy”, “overly attached” or “jealous”? – clingy and jealous (im trying to work on it tho)

56: Have you ever “destroyed” a relationship? – possibly

57: Do you think it’s silly to consider suicide because of a broken heart? – no

58: Are you the “dominant” or the “submissive” part in a relationship? – ….sub

59: Have you ever forgotten important dates like your partner’s birthday or your anniversary? – never but then again ive only been in one relationship my whole life

60: What’s your opinion on open relationships? – i personally dont think i could do it but if u do then more power to u

61: Who’s more important: Your partner or your family? – both

62: How do you define “cheating”? – when u start looking at other people the way u see ur partner and not being honest w them abt it communication is key

63: Is watching porn while being in a relationship inappropriate? – nah

64: Do you think Valentine’s Day is overrated? – a little yeah but thats bc ive never been an active participant in it lmao

65: Would you consider yourself a “cuddler”? – def only in the winter tho bc texas summers are hell like literally