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#best way to practice backgrounds is making it about whatever you’re into atm
fosliie · 5 days
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They say that I’m a star, that I won’t last
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lancermylove · 3 years
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Obsession (HC)
Fandom: Obey Me
Pairing: All x gn!Reader, Luke platonic
Warning: None
Requested by: Anon
Prompt: obey me boys with mc who is obsessed with rilakkuma and pusheen cat (~˘▾˘)~
A/N: I had a little too much fun with these hcs, and I wrote these at 3 am. Forgive me. 😂
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His eyes burn. Too cute for his taste, but whatever makes you happy.
If you display your collection in your room, forget him ever coming to visit you. Your bedroom is like Heaven for him...and if you dare to ask him to come to your room, Lucifer will bring an anti-cross and hold it out in front of him while hissing. 
If only he could ban cute things in the House of Lamentation, but that would mean you and Asmo would be banned.
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Cat? Did someone say cat? CAT!
Satan will “borrow” all your Pusheen cat items. After all, since you like him, what is yours is his. He’s not stopping you from borrowing his books, so you can’t stop him from taking items from your collection. All your arguments are invalid! Besides, you have that other character you are obsessed with. 
If Satan starts collecting Pusheen themed things, then in no time the House of Lamentation will be covered with cat items. Who knows, one day, someone might find the dorm drowning in Pusheen items. 
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That’s nice. He doesn’t really have much to say as the characters are a bit too cute for his liking. 
The butler occasionally surprises you with rare Pusheen/Rila items. Let’s just say he has connections in the Human Realm.
If he sees your obsession getting out of hand, Barbatos will be concerned, but liking Rila/Pusheen will not harm you in any way, right? Right? Just to be sure, he needs to check the doorways in his room. 
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Levi will be happy if you have a collection of Rilakkuma/Pusheen items! But there is no way you can beat his collection. Don’t even think about saying your collection is better than him - Levi might just sulk for days and not talk to you.
He doesn’t like that you’re obsessed with them, though. Levi especially doesn’t like that all your laptop/tablet/phone backgrounds are of your favorite characters. He wishes you would put a picture of him...oh wait!
Levi ends up taking lots of pictures of himself with Rilakkuma and Pusheen plushes and sends them to you. Maybe now you will change your phone background.
- he will randomly make outfits for your Rilakkuma plushie. Levi claims he just made the outfit as practice, but in reality, he likes to see your eyes light up with joy
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He is lowkey jealous of the attention you give to the two characters. Can’t you just give all that attention to him?
Sometimes, he wants to decorate his attic room with Rila/Pusheen items so that you will spend more alone time with him. He would do it, but it takes too much effort, and he doesn’t want to spend money. 
- Maybe he could borrow Goldie and max it out~. That way, he can get the items and get Mammon in trouble.
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CUTE, but not cuter than you. Diavolo likes both of the characters and loves to hear you talk about them. 
He will randomly gift you random Pusheen/Rila items just to see your smile. When you’re happy, he’s happy. Barbatos literally has to stop the prince from buying out entire stores for you.
Maybe in the future, he might plan a Rilakkuma or Pusheen themed event for Devildom. He can’t wait to see your smile on that day.
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Mammon thinks Rilakkuma is cute, but if you have a collection, then all he sees is $$$. If you have collector's items, then even better! 
He may or may not take items for your collection, but don’t worry, the Avatar of Greed will buy you new stuff when...if...he clears his debt. Keyword: if. 
If you get upset at him, Mammon will try his best not to see your bedroom as his personal atm, but he can’t promise anything. His excuse: “but I am the Avatar of Greed...it’s not my fault!” 
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You think Rilakkuma and Pusheen cat are cute? But...but...he is so much cuter! Just look at his large eyes and adorable face. You should give all your attention to him, not those two characters.
Luke doesn’t like it when you talk a lot about Rilakkuma or Pusheen, and he especially dislikes your collection (if you have one). If only he could gift you Luke items...then maybe you would think about him more. Wait, does Devildom sell items with his face on them? On second thought, demons buying objects with his face on them scares him.
Despite his hatred towards the characters, Luke bakes you a cake in the shape of either Rilakkuma/Pusheen for your birthday
It’s your special day, so that’s the only reason he is making an exception. Don’t you dare think otherwise!
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Cute! Cute! CUTE! 
Asmo absolutely loves the characters and can see why you are obsessed with them. Whenever he goes shopping, especially in the Human Realm, he makes sure to buy Rila/Pusheen items for you. 
All he wants in return is for you to give him attention as well. Those two characters can’t keep taking your attention all the time. Besides, he’s your lover, after all, so you HAVE you shower him with affection and attention. 
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Simeon likes to hear you talking about the characters, especially when you get excited about a new item release. He sometimes wishes he could bring that type of smile on your lips.
He asks Luke to bake Pusheen/Rila treats for you, especially when he sees you are not feeling well or are sad. 
Simeon doesn’t mind the characters taking all your attention. In the end, all he cares about is your happiness. If you are happy, he won’t ask for anything more. Though a hug or kiss now and then would be nice. 
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He is very accustomed to seeing humans obsessing over characters, so Solomon is not surprised in the slightest. 
But saying that, if your room has Rila/Pusheen items from ceiling to floor, he will get a little concerned. He literally feels a blinding white light hit his eyes as soon as he enters your bedroom. 
He is currently coming up with spells to see if he can create a walking/talking Rila or Pusheen for you. 
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Beel thinks your obsession and the characters are cute.
Even if you have a massive collection of items, he will have issues with it. Do whatever makes you happy, but he can’t say he understands your obsession with them.
If you have any food items of Pusheen/Rila, Beel will eat them. It’s very difficult for him to resist, so he hopes you don’t get too mad at him. If you do, he will try to find that item in the Human Realm while trying his best not to eat it again.
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➣ Obey Me Masterlist
➣ Buy me a Ko-fi? ➣ Commission: Open || Requests: Closed
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2-cute-4-school · 3 years
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𝚗𝚌𝚝 𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚖 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚝𝚘 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚌𝚛𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚜 𝚠𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚎 𝚜𝚝𝚞𝚍𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚎𝚡𝚊𝚖𝚜
requested by anonie:  hi if you’re taking requests could you do an NCT Dream reaction to you crying while studying for exams because you’re stressed? thank you !
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Mark Lee
my boi understands the STRESS
he debuted like 6 times and he has more comebacks and schedules than he can count bby is so overworked sometimes  °(ಗдಗ。)
i think you’re probably each other’s safe places
whenever mark catches sight of you he just buries himself in your arms and all his stress and worries melt away as he breathes in your familiar scent (.づ◡﹏◡)づ.
your hugs? his best medicine
so when he finds you trying to muffle your cries in your hands, hunched over open textbooks, a mess of pens and littered papers around you
his heart breaks just a lil (*>_<*)
why didn’t you come to him?? or at least call him??? don’t you trust him?? is he part of the reason of your tears???? what if-
“mark?” ༶ඬ༝ඬ༶
but as your meek voice calls for him he decides that questions can wait
you are his one and only priority
he dashes to your side and engulfs you in his arms─=≡Σ(づ ̄ ³ ̄)づ
“it’s okay baby, you’ll be fine, i’m here, i’m with you”
you just hide your face in his chest and allow yourself to break into sobs that wrench mark’s poor lil heart while mark caresses your back and head
“just let it all out baby, i’m right here, i’ll always be here”(๑´•д • `๑)
he keeps murmuring comforting words as you slowly run out of tears
once you calm down enough to explain the reason of your breakdown to him, he just presses a kiss to your forehead ლ(´﹏`ლ)
“how about you take a rest for tonight and we’ll talk tomorrow and i’ll find a way to help you through this, hm? does that sound good?”
you make him promise he’ll stay with you for this night he has no objections (ღゝ◡╹)ノ♡
he ends up playing his guitar for you with your head on his lap asfdsfksf until you fall asleep and then spoons you after tucking you in
his softness for you doesn’t prevent him from having a serious discussion with you to make sure you know you can always come to him for anything and then ends up helping you study might end up asking for help as well _(T-T*)
Huang Renjun
this boi seems really chill while at home
so i’d say that he mostly minds his business if you’re busy with school work like he’s probably in a corner painting or sumthin’ the lil artsy fairy that he is (❁´▽`❁)*✲゚*
he does check up on you from time to time to make sure that you’re... you know... alive and breathing?? lol fun times huh
but still, silent comfort IS your love language ∩(︶▽︶)∩
so he kinda assumes that you ALREADY know he’s there for you at any time anywhere in any way you may ever need him
so when he hears a muffled sob from behind the door you’re studying in?
his heart BREAKS ꒰๑˃͈꒳˂͈๑꒱ノ*゙̥
but he also doesn’t want to stress you out even more or scare you so he slowly enters the room to find you hunched over your desk
he hesitates for a moment as his chest just clenches in hurt while he watches your shoulders shake with muffled whimpers ˓˓(ᑊᘩᑊ⁎)
so he walks up to you and lays a gentle hand on your shoulder
he waited for a moment to make sure that you’re comfortable with his presence in such vulnerable moments
and the he just ENGULFS you in a firm embrace and you FINALLY get the chance to ground yourself as you let out all of the pent up frustration in the arms of the person you trust the most (๑◕︵◕๑)
he just pats your head and you bury your face in his chest and you just ✨melt✨ into each other
i don’t think he’d say much tbh (´°ω°`)
there’s a silent mutual understanding that all you need right now is someone- him to lean on when you’re too tired to hold yourself upright
as you start calming down he presses a kiss to your head before speaking softly but firmly
“you’re taking a break, come on let’s eat and then we can have a lazy evening for once” ε-(‘ヘ´○)┓
“but-”
“oh we can finally try out the fluffy blanket we bought together last week”
he AIN’T TAKING NO FOR ANSWER!!! ( ̄ω ̄)
you spend the evening wrapped up in each other under your blanket with a forgotten movie playing in the background while renjun hums a lullaby’s tune in your ear
Lee Jeno
he has a sixth sense for you
you can’t get away WITH ANYTHING ¯\_༼ᴼل͜ᴼ༽_/¯
you stub a toe: aw frick-
jeno, thousands of km away in the middle of rolling his hips into another dimension during practice: something’s wrong ಠ_ಠ
so i think he might notice even before you that you’re kinda breaching your limit
but ba(r)bie isn’t sure how to approach you without offending you since you’re kinda irritable because of the stress ofc he doesn’t blame you
so if he fails to stop you before your breakdown he’s gonna blame himself for sure tho so make sure to reassure him once you’re stable he’s gonna keep a VERY watchful eye over you ( ◉  〜 ◉ ) 
he’s 100% READY to be there for you!!!!!
he has fluffy blankets, your favourite sweets and snacks, your preferred take out place on speed dial in case you’re hungry AND your comfort show prepared  (•̀o•́)ง
what he isn’t prepared tho?
his OWN heart cracking at the sight of your pain and exhaustion (ಗдಗ) 
he LITERALLY CAN’T stop the small whine building up in his chest as he strides over to your side for support
so when you wrap yourself around him like a lil koala, trembling in his hold and muttering through tears that it’s just too much-
his ULTIMATE protectiveness kicks in FULL MODE (ಢ⊱ಢ 。)
he just scoops you up and burrito wraps you into the gigantic mound of blankets already prepared for you while pressing a lingering kiss to your forehead i promised i’d make it his trademark so here ;)
he *dashes* to bring over all of the snacks AND is already on the phone if you decided you wanted something to eat
basically bf jeno didn’t come to play ║ * ರ Ĺ̯ ರ * ║
spends the rest of the night literally PAMPERING you in anything you need
and most importantly... LOTS OF KITHES AND CUDDLES!!!!( *¯ ³¯*)♡
his baby deserves a chill and lovely night and he’s gonna provide exactly that and the absolute best for you :<
also jeno will gather all of his remaining braincells to help you the next of the day he really seems a smart kid in my opinion
Lee Donghyuck
hyuck is a LOVELY person don’t get me wrong (๑♡⌓♡๑)
but he’s also a tease so he might unintentionally push you to your limits with a few remarks
poor babe really didn’t realize you were going through it
so just imagine his panic once you just burst into tears after what should have been a harmless teasing from him (╬⁽⁽ ⁰ ⁾⁾ Д ⁽⁽ ⁰ ⁾⁾)
“ba-babe? what happened, did i go too far?? i’m so sorry my love, i just-”
he keeps on rambling and you just cry even harder cuz come on hyuck is just such a thoughtful boyfriend
“i’m really sorry y/n, please don’t cry, i’ll do ANYTHING-” ٩(´Д` ;)۶
you try to explain to him that he’s not at fault for your breakdown
obviously it’s not really comprehensible but it’s enough for hyuck to understand once he hears the words ‘stress’ and ‘exhausted’
he simply embraces you as tight as he can and reassures you that humans have their own limits (っ⇀⑃↼)っ
and that taking a break doesn’t invalidate your hard work and dedication
he understands how overworking can affect a person so he knows how to handle the situation
he proposes taking a hot bath once you’ve calmed down and he adds extra bubbles and a really nice smelling body wash (╯✧∇✧)╯
and after that- YOU’RE ON BED REST!! no excuses
if you protest? you wouldn’t dare
stops you with kisses all over your face before fully shutting you up with a soft but firm kiss on your lips o┤*`3´*├o
you spend the entire rest of the day restrained in his hugs
you really scared him so he became a lil lot clingy 
need to go to the bathroom? he INSISTS to piggyback you there since ‘you need all the rest you can possibly get’ (∪。∪)。。。
but i reckon you can’t complain since you have the chance to spend some quality time with your also busy boyfriend
my boy will also go to the ends of the world in order to help you the next day to study whether that means burning his own brain or gathering half of nct and his manager to get everything done in time (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و
Na Jaemin
it’s literally NO SURPRISE when i say that he’s PROTECTIVEx1000000 of his loved ones (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧
so why would you even bother to hide anything from him??
it’s LITERALLY no use
he’s a very very doting person and he keeps tabs on you no matter what, sometimes even uncounciously
and if he’s not there physically? NO PROBLEM!!
texts and calls between he two of you are a very common occurence bubs just wants to make sure you’re well and happy (˃̵ᴗ˂̵)
so unless you’re a top class at acting, good luck in trying to play off your stress and tiredness
but let’s say that due to busy schedules and different timetables it somehow gets past him
babe will be so heartbroken (๑´•д • `๑)
his worry topples over as he freezes in your doorway for a moment at the sight of your defeated form and tear-stained papers
BUT he does a good job in keeping his composure because he can’t risk letting his emotions get the best of him when you need him ( •̀ω•́ )
so he just trudges up to you and SMOTHERS you in the tightest hug possible, tucking your head in his shoulder so you could cry freely hidden away from the rest of the world
he coos a few words here and there, encouragements, compliments, reassurement that ‘you’re more than enough, you just need to take a moment to relax and breathe’ ✧˖°ˈ·*ε-(๑˃́ε˂̀๑ )
otherwise, he’ll leave the talk for the next day when you’re rested both physically AND mentally 
after you calm down he helps you put away all your school work you wouldn’t dare oppose him on this for the rest of the day
we all know what’s coming up i’m sorry
COMFORT FOOD!!!! (ノ^ヮ^)ノ*:・゚✧
he seats you on a kitchen stool while he cooks whatever you need at the moment, anything his baby wants
honestly he just adapts to whatever you need atm
cuddles in silence? works for him!! wanna ramble? there to listen!! want netflix and chill??? absolutely!!!!
Zhong Chenle
sooo from what i’ve gathered he’s not exactly emotional???
but also have you seen this absolute cutie when jisung was crying at the dream show?? babe was trying so hard to comfort his bff but he also seemed uh.. a bit awkward a bit? in a cute way tho!! (๑⁍᷄౪⁍᷅๑)
but i do think he’ll falter once he catches sight of your state!!!!
so many mental debates too!! (๑′°︿°๑)
‘they’re hunched over, did they fall asleep? wait shaking?? is it cold in here????... fuck no was that a sob?? do i... do i go over to comfort them? but how like do i hug or do i talk or..? what if they break up with me??? shit what have i done recently?? i washed the dishes, i cleaned the dog poop, i took out the trash.. it can’t be this’
my boy is going through THE CRISIS OF HIS LIFE (≖ლ≖๑ )
so he reluctantly walks up to you determined to help
but when he reaches you? *brain fart*
ends up patting your head and rubbing your back, but his touch manages to ground you without overwhelming you even further (っ⇀⑃↼)っ
if you end up pulling him into a hug tho, he won’t hesitate to hold you
while comforting you he finally notices your open notebooks filled with messy writing
he feels weirdly relieved that you’re not breaking up with him and neither is it something *tragic*  •(◐﹏◐)•
he’ll let you cry it out before he asks if you’d like some help with your school work he asked fans to send their maths homework so he must be a nerd enough to be able to help you too
but you’re probably too drained(×ω×)  to do anything so you two just settle for a cuddle session under a mountain of blankets
and daegal therapy!!!!!O(≧∇≦)O who probably loves you more than chenle and he ends up whining jokingly about it
chenle will probably focus on lifting up your mood with jokes and stories and he’d do anything to cheer you up
he might try to spoil you too 
and he’s not letting you refuse the ton of food he orders since ‘you deserve to fill up your batteries’ ~~旦_(-ω-`。)
i’m sorry for your tummies after the ammount of sweets you shared
Park Jisung
ah nct’s certified crybaby(lovingly)
might just start crying with you because if you cry he cries too 
i honestly see him a bit panicky in a delicate situation like this once where he has to deal with *emotions* (。´>д<)っ彡☆
so he watches from a safe distance at first
literally jisung.exe has shut down
but then poor kid starts feeling guilty about just watching you suffer without helping and comforting you but he’s kinda scared that he’s only gonna make it worse (●’Д’●)
‘come on park jisung think!!! what would-... what WOULD JAEMIN DO!!’
*cue lighbulb going off above his head*
cue calling jaemin and getting scolded for being on the phone with him instead of being by your side but still giving his precious baby advice
jisung probably comes up with a speech before approaching you he’s nervous okay? ┌༼ σ ‸ σ ༽┐
he lays a hand on your head, gently caressing you and just as he takes a breath to start his speech, you just look up to him with THE kicked puppy eyes ༼ つ ◕ ‸ ◕ ༽つ and jisung is A GONER꒰ლ✘ㅿ✘ლ꒱ 
he MELTS into a puddle of uwus and just leans into you, opting for silent comfort and that’s how he found out that cuddles>>>>>>words
he kinda babbles a little while holding you words are hard ya know
he kinda rambles after you calm down too so now you have to calm him down you’re both messes but you’re cute so
so what is the most efficient way to shut him up? peck his lips!!!!
and as he melts into your hold he remembers that ‘wait!! i’m the one supposed to comfort them!!!!’ (•̀o•́)ง
so he throws his nerves out the window for a moment and just cups his entire world your face in his hands and pecks your all over your face
you end up watching some compilations with kitties or something on both your phones untill your batteries die so then you switch to another device gen z behaviour 
he also probably gets a call from jaemin too and you figure out that your puss of a boyfriend had to call his friend in order to help you
so you give him that look <(`^´)>
let’s say he’s taking you out for brunch the next day AND helping you with your school work 
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You’re My Bodyguard, Not My Owner. (Chapter 28) (Brendon Urie x Reader)
Twenty-two years earlier. (Y/L/N) family home, whereabouts unknown.
Your father carefully placed your delicate body back into your cradle, placing his index finger in your tiny open palm; your fingers instinctively wrapped around his bigger one and gripped it tight.
“Isn’t she a beauty?” he fussed, gazing adoringly at your sleeping frame.
“Very much so,” The Director concurred, stepping up to take a stand next to your father and clamp a hand on his shoulder. He knew precisely what was running through his friend’s mind, and he needed to reassure him. “You’re doing the right thing, Erik.”
“Am I?” your father wondered, frowning a bit as he took in your infant features and how peaceful and innocent you looked. “Because I’m starting to think that I’m about to make the biggest mistake of my life.”
“That can be argued.”
“She’s just a baby, Nick.”
The Director’s lips pursed slightly and his eyes narrowed infinitesimally as he looked at you. He understood where your father’s hesitation was coming from; if it were up to him, Fury would personally escort you and your parents to the most untraceable, safest corner of the Earth to ensure that nothing would ever happen to any of you. Sadly, that was not an option.
Both men were not at all pleased with the logistics of what was about to happen, but they both knew what the future held, and they recognized that this was perhaps the only way to guarantee that they would have at least some form of un upper hand.
“There’s no other way?” Fury spoke a moment later, voice uncharacteristically soft, “No other person?”
Your father gave a sad shake of his head as he sighed. “Not in this universe or the next,” he answered, “It’s her…”
“Destiny?”
“I was going to say ‘birthright’,” your father chuckled, looking to his friend before turning to you and gently touching your cheek, “but I suppose ‘destiny’ isn’t incorrect.”
Fury observed the act of unconditional love being exchanged before him, allowing it to run its course before he too leaned down to touch your face.
“Nothing bad will ever happen to her, Erik,” he said lowly, “I promise you that.”
“I don’t doubt that you will protect her when I’m unable to do so,” your father replied, a crease forming along his forehead, “but as much as I need you to protect her, I need you to guide her still more. Can you do that for me?”
“Hey, I’m no Norse god,” Fury scoffed before nodding, “but you can bet your ass that I’ll do the best that I can.”
��That’s all I ask of you,” your father whispered, giving The Director a tight-lipped smile before turning to face you.
“My beautiful snowflake,” he muttered. A sad smile graced his youthful features as he looked down at you – the epitome of innocence and ignorance – and his smile quickly turned into a frown as his thoughts drifted to what he was about to do.
“I’m so sorry,” he whispered, kissing your head softly before straightening up, “this is never what I wanted for you.” He shook his head as he touched his right index and middle finger to his forehead, and then pressed it to yours. “But in time,” he closed his eyes and when he reopened them a moment later, they were a glowing-grey in colour, “I hope you will understand the reasoning behind my actions.”
With that, seemingly in a trance, he drew in a deep breath and as he exhaled – slowly and carefully – the grey gradually drained from his eyes. After the colour had completely diminished, your father broke out of his trance with a light shake of his head.
The Director, who had been looking on in silence the entire time, was the first to speak. “Is it done?” he questioned, forehead creasing as he took a cautious step forward, joining your father in looking down at you.
“Yes,” your father spoke quietly.
You looked up at your father and godfather with lips curved into a smile and eyes the colour of glowing-grey.
“It’s done.”
 Present day. A diner somewhere on the outskirts of North Carolina.
Roughly seven hours had passed since you fled from S.H.I.E.L.D HQ, and much to your amazement, there had been no pouty-lipped, emotionless bodyguards pursuing you in a car chase, or dropping out of a helicopter, or chasing you on foot the entire way like you expected there to be. Not a single one. It was a tad disappointing, to be honest.
Sweat looked good on Brendon.
You could envision your recapture right now; a bunch of agents busting through the door and rushing over to you, weapons drawn, faces creased with a bitter mixture of anger and irritation, beckoning for you to get up, saying how could you do something like this when you know the risks involved and that Fury was irate and that you better never try something like this ever again. Then comes the rough gripping of the arm, and the guiding towards whatever vehicle they chose to accompany them on this particular mission, then the opening of the door for you (as if you were royalty, a queen being tended to by her servants and not an escaped asset; but you knew better than to think of it as any more than a guileless gallantry) and after you climbed in, the door would shut again, and they would drive you back to where ‘you would be safest’.
Oh, and Brendon would be there, too. He’d be the one doing the arm gripping and tedious lecturing.
He would be – if they had shown up.
You were 99% sure that there would be no S.H.I.E.L.D agents finding you anytime soon – even your bodyguard. You had taken all the precautions necessary to ensure that you would be off S.H.I.E.L.D’s radar for a significant amount of time; about forty-five minutes away from HQ, you pulled over at a convenience store to stock up on supplies and to use the ATM to withdraw some cash from the credit card you had taken. You withdrew as much money as you could but made sure not to max it out and once you pocketed the cash, you bent the card in half and tossed it in a nearby trashcan before hurrying back to your vehicle and driving off; you took the back route out of state, opposite to the route you were originally driving on so as to throw S.H.I.E.L.D off.
The SUV wasn’t a problem, either; you had specifically targeted the only off-limits one – that was due in for a repair to its tracking system. It would suffice as a reliable form of transport until you could get to somewhere you could find something more practical – it wasn’t the most inconspicuous of vehicles, after all. So as far as practical things go, you had done everything to make sure that you were a ghost.
Yet, you still couldn’t shake the uncertainty of that 1%.
“Hey, pretty eyes,” the busboy’s voice broke you out of your trance, and you shook your head a little before turning to him with raised brows. He slung a tattered dishrag over his right shoulder and cocked his head up at you. “You alright?”
“Perfect. Why do you ask?”
He made little effort to hide his amusement when he replied, making vague hand gestures at the crockery on the table in front of you; the food on which lied entirely untouched.
“Rez brought your food over a solid fifteen minutes ago, and you haven’t taken a single bite. Haven’t even nicked a fry.”
Your gaze fell upon the burger and fries combo in front of you. The sight made you nauseous all of a sudden. The sun had only risen about an hour ago; you should’ve ordered something more breakfast-friendly instead.
“Oh. Yeah,” you mumbled, voice completely monotonous; you didn’t care to be wasting precious moments on useless talk with a busboy when your time could be better spent gazing out of the diner window and thinking about how much of a disaster your life is.
For goodness sake, busboy, let a girl be depressed in peace.
An uncomfortable quiet was what followed, as you took it upon yourself to study the top bun of your burger in detail while your newfound acquaintance rocked back and forth on his heels, occasionally letting out a low whistle. You counted eighteen sesame seeds before he broke the silence.
“So do you want me to heat it up for you or…?”
“Actually, if you don’t mind,” you lifted the plate from the table and handed it to him, “Make it a take-out, please.”
He thinned his lips and gave a two-fingered salute. “Sure thing.”
“And,” you stopped him before he could walk away, “could I pay in the meantime? I’m kinda on a… tight schedule.”
“Yeah, ‘course. You can come right up front; Bets will ring you up.”
“Thank you,” you gave him a small smile as you gathered your jacket and car keys and slid out of the booth.
Bets was a pudgy, ginger-haired woman, dressed in a classic diner uniform – white skirt draped with a splotched red-apron and a white shirt with her name embroidered across the breast pocket. She wore glasses that despite her efforts to keep them in place, kept sliding down the ridge of her nose; her eyelids were overly caked with blue eye shadow, and you could see the stains her red lipstick left on her teeth when she grinned at you as you approached the till.
“Cheeseburger and shake, righ’?”
You confirmed with a nod, only offering Bets a sliver of your attention, since most of it had now been drawn towards the TV bracketed to the wall on your right. The volume was turned down rather soft, so you couldn’t quite make out what was being said, but there was no mistaking the blue-eyed man whose picture took up the majority of the screen; the background was of some or other hotel or conference center – you weren’t too sure. Even through a picture being broadcasted on a TV screen, his allure radiated through, drawing you in instantly. It was ridiculous that someone had that kind of magnetism, but even in the way he was posed in the picture, eyes sparkling and a coy smirk on his lips, it was clear that he had the ability to charm everyone and everything he came across – even the lens of a camera.
“That’ll be $9.28, hun,” Bets spoke, and you fished through your pockets before pulling out a ten and a five and handing it over.
“Keep the change. And, uh, could you turn that up, please?” you waved a hand at the TV and Bets obliged, picking up the remote and turning the volume up.
“…Doctor Aaron Ross, world-renowned agnoiologist, physiologist and expert on Norse mythology, will be concluding his five-day seminar with an exclusive panel hosted at The Ritz hotel in Chicago, Illinois this evening. The event will begin at 6pm and…”
 “Chicago,” you muttered, catching the attention of the busboy, who’d just set your food down in front of you; he arched his brows as you turned to address him, “that’s a, what, ten hour drive from here?”
“Twelve, actually.”
“Twelve,” you repeated with a nod as you turned to look at the clock hanging on the wall above the exit.
7:30 am.
Extending your thanks to the diner employees, you grabbed your food and dashed for the SUV, starting up and heading for Chicago. If you kept up a steady pace, you’d arrive at around 8pm. And maybe, just maybe, you’d be able to score a dinner date with a certain acquaintance.
_______________________________
Thank you for reading x
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mr-brightside24 · 7 years
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Hello again! I'm that American who messaged you yesterday about St. Petersburg! I've been trying to learn Russian for over 2 years now, and wasn't able to take Russian again at school this semester bc of other graduation requirements. Would you mind giving me any tips on learning it? I know you're native, so it's different. But maybe what did you do to be fluent in English? I have a very hard time with listening/speaking. (1/2)
2/2: Maybe do you know any Russian tv series, movies, bands, etc would you recommend that I try listening to and watching? Or whatever else comes into your mind! Lol I've watched quite a bit of Masha and Medved in class! Thanks!!
heeyy, great to meet you! i’m gonna post your ask here in case someone else would like to add something. gotta tell you - it’s a tough one because i don’t watch/listen much of russian stuff lately. but that’s amazing that you’re learning it, i hope i can be any help.
i’m going to recommend you to listen to Zemfira songs (Земфира) - because she has a great pronunciation, she says words very clearly when she sings. some examples:
Земфира - Главное
Земфира - Мы разбиваемся
Here is the mix
i’m zero at the modern music but the following bands are very popular atm, the lyrics don’t make much sense but the songs are extremely catchy so maybe it’ll help to remember some words (as they will stuck in your head lol):
Время и Стекло - Наверно потому что
Время и Стекло - Имя 505
IOWA - Бьет Бит 
Burito - Мама 
Мот - Капкан (in case you okay with hip hop)
Ленинград - Экспонат
Alekseev - Снова Осколки
Полина Гагарина - Спектакль Окончен
^ these are examples for you to chose what you like and then you could just go through their channels on youtube
***
russian-language movies that i would recommend were made in ussr. FIRST OF ALL: Sherlock Holmes series. If you like Sherlock Holmes you’ll enjoy it. 
here they are with subtitles
***
one of my all time fav is War and Peace by Bondarchuk (1967). imo it’s the best adaptation of the books ever. yeah, it’s long and slow, but it is epic and must help you to get closer not only with the language but with the culture in general.
you can watch it here
then... The Irony of Fate (1976), Иван Васильевич меняет профессию (1973), Бриллиантовая рука (1968), Собачье сердце (1988)
I can also recommend to watch Solaris (1972) by Tarkovsky because well, not only it’s a very deep film but it has a slow dynamic - the actors don’t speak too fast in there. so maybe it will help to catch up with the lines. Here it is with english subtitles.
talking about modern russian cinema.. there are two kinds: shitty comedies and great but extremely depressing movies. so there is only one film that comes to my mind, it’s here - Питер FM (2006). hey, it’s about Saint Petersburg btw! you’ll love it
this show is quite good - Кухня (The Kitchen) - but i can’t find it with subtitles, maybe you’ll just practice your listening.
Masha and Medved is cute! haha :D i grew up on a soviet era cartoons and i have a feeling you would find them quite bizzare. but you could give it a try. as i can see that YT channel has lots of stuff with subtitles.
myself i learned english mostly by staying on the internet tbh and reading fanfiction (that’s why i still have problems with the tenses). watching shows/movies is a great help too. oh, maybe you could watch your favorite eng language series with russian voiceover? i remember when i was a student i also had BBC news on in the background constantly, just listening to muffled english speech all the time, getting used to it. 
i was extremely shy to speak in english at first but then i’ve been living in europe for a little while, dating a foreign person so it was the only way to communicate. helped to break the fear of talking out loud. in the end you realize you don’t have to worry that your accent/pronunciation sounds weird, you’re not native, people understand it, they’re not gonna mock you
i just wanna add if you’re struggling with speaking or writing or learning russian in general, don’t blame yourself - it is a difficult language. heck, lots of russians are far from being good at it. hope you’ll get to your goals. if you have any more questions - i’ll be here
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samosasandchutney · 7 years
Text
okay, so let me try and give you some information on how lacking the Caribbean is in free-thinking and addressing mental health.  Some background info first, I am a petite Indian-Hindu girl, stereotypically nerdy, antisocial and awkward af around new people, with the glasses, had the braces and am always in a book and always dressing in oversized tees and jeans. So, people generally place me in the stereotyped category of “nerdy, demure, innocent Indian girl”.  With that said, I am an Indian girl who lives in a predominantly black country and the Indian community, as small as it is, is extremely extreeemely like, (woh boy) so socialist, even divided so much so that there’s a group of what we call Sindhis (people that came directly from India in more recent times) and the Guyanese community (descendants of the indentured Indians between the years of, roughly, 1833-1920). Even though I technically fall in the second grouping, I never really belong there because of the ‘nerdy, demure, innocent, indian girl’ stereotype as well as the fact that I’m not “Guyanese” enough.  So being isolated from your own community and then not finding any way to connect with the people around you, it’s tiring.  Facing this and my depression, chronic panic disorder and developing ocd, life gets trying.  So these mental illnesses are kind of crippling, especially since they’re not being treated properly. 
The first person I did go to try and get some sort of help was this priest that was recommended to my mother.  At the time I was thirteen and my mom believed my ‘acting out’ was because my father had died three years prior (I was suffering from panic attacks but she assumed it was ‘attitude’ because my panic attacks included moments of anger, frustration and crying).  On the first visit the priest started to criticize me for being Hindu and told me that my lack of belief in God is what is causing these problems.  Not only that but then he started to guilt trip me about how my mother, a now single mother, cannot afford to have her daughter ‘act out’ and ‘ruin’ any chances of her advancing in her life. which like.  .. what??  The second person I went to was an Indo-Trini Christian. School was a rather stressful time for me at this moment because during my two years in sixth form I was so crippled by my mental illness that it took a terrible toll on my physical health and I was also suffering from a severe case of costochondritis.  I was trying to explain to this lady that at home I was suffering from some situations that was affecting my depression and anxiety.  All she kept focusing on was school. Like she was telling me, “oh you have to get out of bed, you have to go to school, do your best,” Like it was all my personal decision to miss school. (> > really? really?)  Then she started talking about going to school overseas and I immediately was sent into panic, because I had mentioned literally a session prior stating how money is a large source of my anxiety.  I immediately just walked out. 
Third person I went to, was a ‘family friend’, so she had previous information on my family dynamics etc. So when i tried to explain that there were problems at home that I need help with either ignoring or dealing with, she also made me focus on school and I’m like ??? School is like, a secondary source of anxiety - that’s kind of normal, what I’m dealing with at home, is more a concern atm.   She then had me try and write out a list as to what I want in life and I’m just like ???? Did what she told me to and when I went in with my list she immediately started telling me that I am a ‘dreamer’. Apparently, my wanting the basic needs of my own home, to have a stable job and to end up living in Canada was too far stretched and I’m just like :|  Why? Then she started to try and guilt me into ‘understanding’ that I’d be placing a financial pressure on my family and ‘how can I just up and leave my family’. . . like ???  How. IS. THIS. SUPPOSED. TO. HELP??? Fourth person I went to, was some, white woman who adopted Hindu practices into her life ( :| really?)  Her first couple of sessions were that of ‘meditative’ purposes, which, cool okay. Imma hold these rocks and just, breathe. I can somewhat understand that this helps with my panic attacks etc (like, I would have liked to have gone through some sort of descriptive, introductory walkthrough but eh.) When it finally comes to a point where we talk about the situation I am in. I say  “I’m suffering from depression and anxiety and I need help trying to mediate my way through it.”  This woman. She laughs. Like “oh, you poor child” laugh. And asks “why would you think that?”  My brain instantly clicks off and I’m like “Because. . .I don’t want to live anymore? I get panic attacks on a daily basis? I can’t get up and face the day?” Like take your pic, I genuinely have more. She then proceeds to laugh again and tells me I must ‘face reality.’ That I have to ‘wake up and realise life is constantly going on and that I can never change that.’  I’ve never been back to that lady. 
The fifth person wasn’t actually someone I attended professionally.  On the day of a midterm, I got a terrible panic attack and could barely move. My friends had to half-carry me to the on-campus clinic. I waited for about 20 minutes before I was finally ‘allowed’ to see the doctor and was promptly giving a side eye and a stupse (kissing of teeth). Apparently I needed to stop ‘playing around’ and ‘making excuses’ and ‘just go do the exam’.  It gets even worse.  Apparently she’s tired of ‘people always making excuses about missing exams, if you’re stupid you should just not be in uwi’.  And she proceeded to rant and shout at me for about 20 minutes. While. I. Am. In. The. Middle. Of. A. Panic. Attack.  . ..  Like.  In Barbados and the extended Caribbean.  Mental illness is NOT a thing.  It’s always pushed to the back burner. And what happens if you try and gain some sort of help you’re stereotyped.  Given my stories, you can tell that being an Indian -school was a priority over getting help. As the daughter of a single-mother, I needed to care for her needs over mine.  And as a female, I must put ideas of ‘fantasy’ out of my head and ‘face reality’.  And as an Indian stereotype of ‘demure, innocent, nerd’ people feel that they can say whatever they want to me because Indian stereotypes state that I must ‘allow’ them to do whatever.  And this is all ONE person’s story. Imagine this situation, happening to the thousands of children within the Caribbean. Males. Females. All of different races. Faced with pretty much only TWO options:  1.  If the parents and/or the children themselves actually have some understanding of mental illness and are suffering from it. The person then faces the options of either pushing the situation under the rug because it’s socially debilitating or the person is shoved in a mental hospital which leads to them to go into a literally senile state or they’re so drugged up they don’t know how to function like a normal person.  2. the parents don’t know anything about mental illness and therefore cannot give the child the support and help the child needs. The child is then left in this constantly traumatic situation and some cannot even make it out of their family’s care / leave their Caribbean home because A. finances and B. the stigma of leaving the country.  So basically, for a place that always tries to claim that there is a constant advancing within their community.  They are not advancing in which really matters, the people and their health. 
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