#beloved little murderer we are all love Norman

[emmaspolaroid]

BIRTHDAY BOYYYY

[aeide-thea]

beautiful & also terrible to have the sort of brain where you find yrself at 4:30 AM looking up intersections between jewishness & arthuriana. like. fucking amazing rabbit hole but. why am i not asleep. my head hurts and my eyes are sandy.

however. some cool things (that probably some of you knew abt already, but i did not!):

King Artus – "a 'Hebrew Arthurian Romance of 1279… Judaized and transformed.' […] Although the story in 'King Artus' is fairly straightforwardly Arthur’s as we know it today, there are little touches that tie it to Jewish literature. When, for example, Arthur’s mother, the Duchess, learns that her husband is dead and she has been deceived by the shape-shifting Uther Pendragon, she tries to figure out how that could be possible. 'No sooner had he gone more than a bow-shot’s distance away from the castle than the messenger came straight to my chamber.' That bow-shot’s distance comes not from Arthurian legend but from the story of Hagar, who sits a bow-shot’s distance away from her son Ishmael when Abraham casts them out and she does not want to see her son die."

Bovo-Bukh – "a chivalric romance adapted in 1507 by Elye Bokher (Elijah Baḥur *Levita) into 650 ottava rima stanzas in Yiddish from a Tuscan version (Buovo d'Antona) of the early 14th-century Anglo-Norman original, Boeuve de Haumton. This tale of the heroic adventures of the noble Bovo, exiled from his homeland by the machinations of his murderous mother, his wanderings through the world (as far as Babylon), and the love story of Bovo and Druzyana, their separation, his triumphant return home, and the final reunion with Druzyana and their two sons, proved to be one of the most beloved tales in the Yiddish literary tradition over the course of more than two centuries."

Vidvilt – "anonymous 15th–16th-century Yiddish epic. This Arthurian romance of the chivalric adventures of Sir Vidvilt (and his father Gawain), based on Wirnt von Gravenberg's 13th-century Middle High German Wigalois, proved to be one of the most enduringly popular secular narratives in Yiddish literary history, with numerous manuscript recensions, printings (the first in an extensively expanded version by Joseph b. Alexander Witzenhausen, Amsterdam 1671), and reprintings, in rhymed couplets, ottava rima (Prague 1671–79), and prose, over the course of three and a half centuries. The anonymous poet of the earliest Yiddish version composed more than 2,100 rhymed couplets (probably in northern Italy), following Wirnt's plot rather closely through the first three-quarters of the narrative (abbreviating much and generally eliminating specific Christian reference), before offering quite a different conclusion."

Sir Gabein – "from 1788-89, a tale in which the Arthurian knight Gabein does not return to Camelot but – via Russia and Sardinia – reaches China and ultimately ascends to the Chinese imperial throne as the new emperor." slow blink.

also this is getting beyond arthuriana into just epic poetry generally but. literally all of this sounds fascinating.

anyway. literary scholar manqué.e hrs as always here at k dot tumblr dot edu obviously! however. my ear is open like a greedy shark, &c.

[saintsenara]

Another ask, this time just for fun. What are your thoughts on original characters in fanfic? Furthermore, what about fanfics that center around original characters?

thank you very for the ask, @hauntingpercival

and the answer is that i am a great defender of original characters in fanfiction because fanfiction is a hobby we do for fun - which means we are entitled to do whatever the fuck we want when writing.

i think that it's incredibly unchic behaviour when people decide they're suddenly professional editors exclusively to complain about their presence in stories - and i don't think there's anyone in fandom who can cast a stone against others when it comes to being a little self-indulgent in their writing...

because - of course - it's basically impossible to write a story set in the harry potter universe [even with the lightning generation] which doesn't use original characters at some point.

even if your protagonist is the most canon-accurate version of the character ever to walk around canon-accurately, co-workers and fellow students and parents and siblings and love interests and friends and shop assistants and random passers-by all need to be pulled from the ether to add colour to the story - and this is especially the case if an author wants to delve into themes or eras which are overlooked in the canon narrative.

as someone who writes a lot about voldemort's life, i have needed to come up with plenty of original characters to serve as his teachers, schoolmates, fellow orphans and so on - and i think it's worth saying that while some of these, like abraxas malfoy, are mentioned in canon, the fact we know nothing canonical about them beyond their names means that they function as original characters too.

and i find it tremendous fun.

[and i've spoken elsewhere about my favourite oc - romulus lestrange - father of the erstwhile rodolphus and rabastan.]

and i do think that it's worth offering a defence of that fun element - i see a lot the suggestion that it's a bit cringe [or, perhaps, a bit arrogant] to take original characters seriously, but i actively enjoy thinking up character details and writing characterisation notes and so on for people who exist exclusively in my head. and - yes - i think the process of fleshing out oc's has broader benefits to me as a writer, but that's really a secondary point next to the fact that it's fun.

i also love naming oc's - and i want to offer here a defence not only of fun but of whimsy.

it has been my great pleasure while writing one year in every ten - which is a murder mystery formed of three different poirot novels in a trenchcoat - to cram in as many characters named after crime writers or stars of classic detective novels as possible.

[when i'm taking things a bit more seriously, i like thinking about the class vibes of the series when making sure any pureblood original characters have anglo-norman names...]

and so - while we're taking a stance in favour of fun and whimsy - i think it's important to also back stories centred around original characters. and to do this even when these oc's are transparently author self-inserts.

all too often the conversation around oc's focuses on how to make them "good" - how to make them unclockable as a self-insert, how to avoid writing a mary-sue, and so...

but i think that's the wrong way to look at it.

people write mary-sues because they want to - because fanfiction is escapism and because sometimes it's nice to imagine yourself as flawless and beloved. people write self-insert because they want to - because it's fun to imagine yourself as part of a fictional world which means a lot to you.

i'm not sure i'd personally find writing an original character self-insert fun [largely because i'm a mess and nobody would want to read about me] - and, to telegraph my own hypocrisy, i really don't like it when characters who have a lot of canon material behind them turn into unrecognisable author surrogates [hence my enmity with fanon!hermione], which i do think it can be argued is a meaningfully different phenomenon...

but people who do enjoy it? well, i love that for them. not everything has to appeal to me, after all.

and - even when oc's aren't mary-sues or intentional author inserts - sometimes it's nice to give the responsibility of telling the story you want to tell to a character of your own, instead of asking a character who has to be dragged from canon to do it for you.

and i know that i do find writing a story centred around these sort of oc's fun because i'm... doing it.

metallurgy - the upcoming sequel to bookbinding - hinges entirely on its original characters: the seven children [since seven is the most powerful magical number] of tom riddle and myrtle warren. these lot are causing carnage in the wizarding world of the 1970s, and i am very much enjoying the ride...

[blookmallow]

rating spirit halloween’s new animatronics for 2021

or at least what’s showing as New Arrivals on the site for me. looks like we got 15 new arrivals listed here and im HYPE about them so here we go

the caretaker

pretty standard reaper character with a Gravedigger theme to it. hes... fine? nothing about this particularly stands out to me, but i dont dislike it at all. i like his gravestone. would be good for a graveyard set. i guess ill give him... 6.5/10

mr. dark

at first glance he also just looks like a standard reaper character (or voldemort. he definitely looks like voldemort now that i think about it) but it turns out he SPRINGS UP RIDICULOUSLY TALL LIKE A CURSED WACKY INFLATABLE TUBE MAN and the spring motion in the video is actually really fucking fast so, while this isn’t a lot different from other jumpscare animatronics, i gotta give him credit bc i guarantee this would have scared the fuck outta me in person. according to the site he’s almost 9 feet tall at his full height 

i expected him to jump out and scream but i did not expect. That. i feel like if you put him up on a stage or something to make him loom over people even more he’d be very menacing indeed. would also be really good if you put him behind something so you don’t see him until he's suddenly There

i like him, 8/10 springy spook man 

click for more 

grave grabber

pretty much just a zombie but he’s cute i like him. i like the green eyes. i dont know what it is about him in motion but the video makes him kind of endearing to me for some reason and i dont know why. 6/10

ophelia

at first for some reason i thought the monster’s name was ophelia but i think that’s supposed to be the name of the victim? i think the idea here is “girl haunted by a Nightmare” but the fact that the monster itself is so small and doesn’t actually have a body for the most part makes this unintentionally hilarious to me 

like. it. it’s so small. it’s just a little shoulder demon. it’s so cute 

psst. hey do we have any more cheetos

anyway i like how the girl’s eyes move back and forth but the sounds she makes are uncomfortable and she just looks so. stiff and solid and there doesn’t seem to be any movement at all other than her eyes and the monster peeking out so it’s just kind of weird to look at. it’s an interesting concept but the execution is just strange and unintentionally hilarious. 7/10 bc i still think its really funny 

someone should buy this and mod it into chrona and ragnarok 

harriet hustle

WE DID IT KIDS WE FINALLY GOT A FEMALE CLOWN ANIMATRONIC im so happy i could cry i wish my store had her set up i want to meet her  

i love how they have her hanging upside down like this, it makes it so much more visually interesting than the figures that just kinda stand there looking spooky, even though she doesn’t really Do much (she just swings and her head moves around a little, just laughs, doesn’t have spoken lines) 

i love her outfit i love her hair shes SO cute i love this little murder gremlin i love her i love her 

im still waiting on spirit to give us a female clown figure that isn’t “creepy little girl” (ive commented before on how their only female figures tend to be either the Old Hag or the Creepy Little Girl and not a lot else) but i absolutely love this all the same 20/10

this one is fun too because we also have: 

henry hustle

according to the description he’s actually harriet’s dad!! we have an evil clown father and daughter duo here and im LIVING for it

i dont think ive ever seen spirit do characters that are related to each other like this that’s so cute,

apparently his wife/harriet’s mother left them and ran off with the ringmaster. he’s a single father clown trying to raise his evil daughter clown and i support him wholeheartedly

there doesn’t seem to be any more animatronics on this storyline, we don’t have the mother here and the only ringmaster animatronic they have is the rotten ringmaster who was released previously, but i doubt he’s the homewrecker ringmaster in question. he Could Be. imagine if your wife left you for That. we dont even know if henry’s wife was also a clown or not. spirit halloween clown lore going on here

anyway i absolutely LOVE this clown, he does something INCREDIBLY STARTLING AND UNEXPECTED which i dont want to spoil for you. go watch his video and see what he does its great 

my absolute favorite type of halloween animatronic is the “does something completely unexpected” category and this one is ALSO a clown and a GOOD clown at that

and he’s got this great vintage clown style i really like, i love scary clowns like this that actually look like they could believably be a real guy and not just some kind of mutant Clown Monster 

and hes got cards!! card suit motif!!! i love it i love him this is a great clown 20/10 for him too

w. raith 

we have this one at my local store and listen to me. im completely obsessed with this ghost

it’s pretty much just a ghost but it’s SUCH A GOOD ghost. especially in this photo here with proper spooky lighting and everything. i would absolutely LOVE to see this in a haunt attraction, it looks SO good even in bright store lighting. i feel like this under the right lights and in the right environment could look SO fuckign cool  

the shredded rag look!!! the ethereal glow!! the weird jellyfishy movement!!! the classic wooOoO oO o o ooo noises!! this may perhaps be the ideal ghost. it is without flaw. a perfect specimen. i fuckign LOVE this ghost i want it so badly but i do not have the space or the money for this thing 15/10 w. raith my beloved. my true love. maybe one day 

buzzsaw

at first i was slightly disappointed to see that this guy didn’t have an actual name, but then in the description apparently his name is Bill “Buzzsaw” Jackson and his backstory is he tried to be a wrestler but it didnt go very well so he grafted weapons in place of his hands. i guess. you know, to be better at wrestling. i dont really understand it and i definitely would not have gone with “disgraced former wrestler” as the concept for this guy  

but anyway we have mr jackson at my store right now, he’s Big, i like him. he doesn’t really move very fast and doesn’t jump at you, he just kinda swings his saw around. for some reason he just seems friendly to me and i dont know why. makes me think of like an uncle dressed up for halloween rather than an actual murderer guy. i dont know i cant explain it but i like him hes my friend 8/10

wacky mole

this guy’s also at my store this year, i didn’t know his name was wacky mole fsdgjsdg

he’s listed as a new arrival, but i thought i remembered seeing him before, and the description says he’s a returning fan favorite, so. i guess this is a re-release 

anyway pretty standard Scary Monster Clown. his teeth look like candy corn. i like it but i think they should just Be candy corn. i like his colorscheme and his silly giant buttons. light up eyes are always a nice touch. he doesnt really stand out but hes overall a pretty good clown. 7/10

grim

good ol’ classic skeleton. he’s pretty nicely modeled though and i highly recommend watching the video for this guy because he moves REALLY well for a spirit animatronic, he’s got a way wider range of movement than most of them do and his head moves really nicely. one of the benefits of a skeleton animatronic is you don’t have to deal with lip movement, so his jaw movements match with his lines a lot more realistically. i like the animated glowing eyes too, it really gives him a lot of personality. he’s really interesting to watch. like, it’s just a skeleton, but it’s a really really good skeleton, so, 8/10 

BEETLEJUICE!!

i love love love franchise character animatronics and spirit has so much great beetlejuice stuff this seems well suited to them but looking at it............. hm. hm

he just looks so. stiff and his face comes across like, deer caught in the headlights to me. it Does Not look very natural but it looks slightly better in motion (he just swivels from side to side and says a few phrases but it somehow looks less. shellshocked when he’s moving) 

maybe not the greatest execution but maybe he looks better in person and im still hype to see him so 8/10 regardless 

night stalker

we have this guy at my store too, im still not really sure what’s going on with his arms (did he just rip loose from them and leave them behind? did someone do this to him? i dont know) but i love a good spooky scarecrow. love his Wiggles. hes a pretty good boy. 6.5/10

here we have another pennywise, it pretty much just pops out at you, but it’s still pretty good. i like the full size one they had before better, but this one’s slightly cheaper and would be easier to integrate into a haunted house attraction since he comes with a built in set piece. it looks good but doesn’t do much. 7.5/10 i guess 

GHOSTFACE!!!!

FUCK YES I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS

please. please spirit halloween set him up in my store so i can see him

anyway hes got kind of the same issue beetlejuice has where the figure just. looks kind of stiff, and he looks more like a spooky ghost decoration than like, A Person. he doesnt seem to have any lines or anything either, he just kinda pops out. but then again i guess whenever we see ghostface in person in the movies he doesn’t usually talk anyway. i dont really know how id make this better but it seems a little underwhelming somehow. still hype to see it though. 7/10 i guess 

now if we could just get a jack torrance and a bela lugosi dracula id be content 

i would LOVE to see Red from Us but i doubt they’d do one. my other horror beloved is norman bates but i know if they made one of him it’d just be him in a dress waving a knife around (not that i wouldn’t still be hype to see him, but, y’know) (anyway. tangent. moving on) 

mr. howle 

it’s. a werewolf. he howls. that’s....... about it 

it’s a very nice looking werewolf, it’s a well designed figure and definitely looks very imposing, but it’s... just a werewolf. there’s not really anything particularly interesting or creative here. its a perfectly good werewolf. i dont have anything to say about this. 6.5/10 

i also just am not a werewolf person so maybe someone out there who has a greater appreciation for werewolves might like him more 

[traincat]

Hi traincat! Hope you're doing well. I figured since you have an extensive knowledge on all things Spider-Man, you would know your way around his rogues! I wanted to ask if you have a favorite or one that you find most compelling and why. Thanks a million!

I think my answers for which rogues are my favorites and which I find most compelling and which are widely viewed as the best and why are all pretty wildly different. I do think the popular assessment that Spider-Man has one of the best rogues galleries in Marvel canon is true. Like, I think the absolute best Spider-Main villain story -- the one that gives you the best sense of the villain as a character and also the one that works best at uniting villain and is Kraven’s Last Hunt, which is just incredible on every level. (Content warning for suicide.)

(Web of Spider-Man #32) Also, like, in terms of design, Kraven is great. Love a big Russian game hunter perpetually bare chested and wearing leopard print cropped leggings. That’s not something you get sick of. Only Kraven Sr. for me, though -- I’m less fond of his son, although I think the whole family affairs in Grim Hunt and Scarlet Spider v2 are pretty fun.

On the other hand, though, I think that some of the biggest villains in Spider-Man’s gallery, namely Norman Osborn and Doc Ock, are overused, although I know why they’re overused and it’s because they’re really good villains. (But also you can only make people pay for the same story so many times with only minor variations before it starts to get old.) I think Norman and Peter are pretty perfect opposites, whereas Otto and Peter are mirror images -- although I think generally Norman stories pull off that opposite nature better than Otto stories reveal him as a mirrored image of Peter. 

I think it’s interesting that Otto is kind of the first “big” villain Peter encounters -- he makes his debut in ASM #3, so there are villains that come before him, but they’re like, the Vulture and the Chameleon. And there are great Vulture stories -- love that flying octogenarian -- but like, I would not put the Vulture in the absolute top tier Spider-Man villains. And the Chameleon is a freak.

Same, girl. (Web of Spider-Man #65) 

More villain talk beneath the cut.

By comparison, Otto is the first villain to actually serve Peter a real defeat, the first one to humble him. So I think it’s interesting that they come from very similar backgrounds -- both geniuses, both lonely as children, both people who were in danger of becoming very solitary, isolated adults, which Otto did and which Peter did not. They had a mother figure who verged on at times or was actually smothering in her affections, and a salt of the earth type father figure. And Otto gains his powers after suffering an accident with radiation much the same way Peter does. It’s one of the things that disappoints me about Superior Spider-Man, because I don’t think it plays into the idea of Otto and Peter as mirrored images of each other nearly as much as it could have. Even Otto’s Parker Industries originally showed up in a “bad” version of Peter’s life, where he never got bit by the spider and instead becomes a CEO:

(Sensational Spider-Man #41) “You prove yourself to everyone -- except yourself.” Which is what Otto is continually trying to do, and which is what he always falls short of. So it’s interesting that there’s kind of all this set up here and that the actual comics sort of continually fall short of it. 

Green Goblin stories live up to their rep a little better, in my opinion, and they’re better at playing into those parallels. Norman and Peter are both self-made men, but Norman is rich and Peter is not. Peter accepts responsibility and fault; Norman does not. Norman’s life is devoid of women, while Peter’s is full of it. If Norman and Peter are both studies in masculinity, then Norman’s is toxic and Peter’s is not. Peter is capable of growth; Norman is entrenched in this role he’s made for himself -- he is not capable of sustained growth beyond the role he’s made for himself. There’s a reason I think Norman gets used so much and it’s because it’s a heady dynamic to kind of play into -- especially when you go with the relatively more recent angle of things where Norman kind of views Peter as the perfect heir, worthy where Harry is not. Honestly, it’s a good time whenever you’re involving Harry in the mix at all, as someone caught between these two very powerful figures and how the tug-of-war there for ownership of him is just completely soul destroying. 

(Spectacular Spider-Man #180)

But I do think Norman is overused, and it’s gotten a point where in Amazing Spider-Man #800 it was like -- oh, what, he’s going to kill Flash? He’s going to kill someone else Peter loves? He’s killed like half the main-main cast at this point. He’s behind the murder of Peter and Mary Jane’s baby, he’s responsible for Ben Reilly’s death, he killed Gwen Stacy, Harry’s death goes directly back to him, he’s kidnapped May and Mary Jane and Flash and blah blah blah it’s JUST TOO MUCH. It can’t always be this one guy! You can’t just bring him back every 50 issues like “this time Norman Osborn’s gone too far” when he went too far in the ‘70s. Everything since then has just been trying to recapture the moment he threw Gwen Stacy off the bridge. It’s exhausting. I’m begging Spider-Man, as it starts hyping up yet another Norman story for ASM #850, to do something new.

In comparison to Norman, I think Harry’s run as the Green Goblin is fairly flawlessly executed as far as villain stories go, especially in its final hour. Spectacular Spider-Man #200 is really one of my favorite single issues of all time. Harry has the pathos that Norman really never does -- you can feel for Harry in a way that you can’t feel for Norman. And it’s because Harry loves Peter -- really, truly loves him -- that his acts of villainy take on that special edge of cruelty. It doesn’t just hurt Peter that these things are being done; it hurts Peter that these are being done and that it’s Harry doing them and that, in a lot of ways, they both blame Peter for why Harry is doing them, even if at the end of the day it’s in no way Peter’s fault. And then there’s the utterly perfect moment as Harry dies in Spectacular Spider-Man #200, that his act of triumph is that he can’t bring himself to kill Peter, because he loves him too much. It’s perfect. I live in fear they’re going to make Harry a villain again and try to replicate it only to fall painfully short. 

I think the Jackal is actually underutilized because he is in my honest opinion the scariest Spider-Man villain, or at the very least the creepiest. Where Norman can only dream of remaking Spider-Man in his own image, the Jackal actually does that with Ben Reilly -- and, to a lesser extent, with Kaine, his first damaged clone. He’s a good lurker, too, less show-y than either Otto or Norman. He lurked in the background for a while. And in a series where I think you can pick a lot of the villains apart as men who take advantage of their power, having the Jackal be a college professor whose villainous career stems from his obsession with one of his students fits right in. And he’s just creepy. He’s upsetting! The things he does to the clones -- both the Peter and Gwen clones, although I think the comics are not so great at letting the Gwen clones shine as individual characters, which is something I wish someone would actually do something about -- are very upsetting, especially since you can extrapolate from a lot of Kaine’s stories and the things we know bother him and how he’s consistently paralleled against Janine Godbe, that both Kaine and the Gwen clones were sexually abused by the Jackal. (Spider-Man’s not typically shy about examining darker subjects, and while we can only extrapolate from canon with Kaine, it’s extremely there on the surface with the Gwen clones. I mean, he married one.) And honestly, the villain who’s whole schtick is cloning makes more sense as someone who can repeatedly come back from anything than Norman’s deal of Corrupt Businessman Surprisingly Hard To Kill. I’ve said before that Peter appears to have a bit of a loophole in his personal moral code when it comes to violence that either has no consequences or lessened consequences, like when he cuts loose against Wolverine, someone who has a healing factor, or when he buried the Juggernaut, supposedly indestructible, in concrete. The Jackal as someone who could and has clone himself repeatedly opens up similar doorways -- what’s to stop Peter from cutting loose if the Jackal isn’t confined to this one body? There’s a lot to play with there and a lot more interesting spaces to go than, say, having to invent increasingly poor excuses for why Peter hasn’t taken more permanent action with Norman if Norman is always going to return to do harm to someone beloved to Peter.

Finally, I’m in a weird spot with personal favorite villains because honestly my instinct is to say the Lizard. And that’s an issue because of one fairly recent storyline and everything that’s spun out from it: Shed (Amazing Spider-Man #630-633), the storyline where Curt Connors loses all control over the Lizard, kills, and partially devours his son Billy. Like, I LIKE grim dark Spider-Man comics, and Shed is honestly too much for me -- not because of the Lizard’s actions, but because in the story Peter fails to save Billy. And I say not because of the Lizard’s actions because I think, as fun as a giant lizard man in purple pants and a lab coat can be, I think Curt Connors makes for one hell of a supervillain metaphor for domestic violence. 

(ASM #365)

(Spectacular Spider-Man v2 #13) And it’s very compelling. There’s a lot of things to explore down that alley. But once you actually go as far as having the Lizard kill his son, you can’t take that back. And the problem is, that’s what Spider-Man comics have tried to do post-Shed. It feels weird and deeply out of character to have writers assume that Peter could forgive the murder of any child, let alone a child he knew, and have him continue his relationship with Curt Connors. It’s a weird message to go “yeah, he ate his kid, but he wasn’t in control, and he made up for it via cloning, so we’re all good now.” Like imagine trying to spin that in any horror movie. It doesn’t work -- that your villain kills his kid and then clones him and pretends everything is okay now would be the plot of the horror movie. Spider-Man is a series fundamentally built on the fact that actions have consequences, and sometimes those consequences are utterly unfixable. Peter can’t go back and intercept the burglar to prevent Uncle Ben’s death. He can’t clone Uncle Ben and wipe that incident out of history. So to have a story like Shed in continuity as something that doesn’t alter Peter’s perception of Curt Connors forever doesn’t work.

Anyway that’s why my favorite villain is the Shocker. Love that quilted bastard.

[reds-self-ships]

🔍 The Adventure of the Detection Club

Chapter 12: Opening Arguments

Table of Contents & Trigger Warnings

⚠ Chapter Specific Warnings: Contains allusions to spoilers for The Great Ace Attorney 2, as well as passing references made to blood and gore.

The next morning Central Criminal Court, Old Bailey Defendant Lobby

Ryunosuke Naruhodo quickly sorted his way through a stack of papers that made up the official court record for the case, shuffling his way through at such a speed that he looked as though he was certainly doing his best not to drop any.

Redford took a long drink from the flash of cocoa that Iris had specially prepared for him, whilst Susato kept a watch over Ryunosuke.

The door swung open with a loud crash as Sholmes barged his way into the room. “Morning, folks!” he roared.

Ryunosuke gave a yelp as he promptly dropped the pages of the court record across the floor. “Sh-Sholmes! Look at what you made me do!”

“Oh I’m terribly sorry about that Mr. Naruhodo—”

“Just help me pick these up!”

Ryunosuke fell to his knees, along with Sholmes, frantically picking them up and trying to re-organise them, all whilst Ryunosuke swore several oaths under his breath in Japanese.

“Apologies if I sound rude or anything, Susato, but is Ryunosuke always so…‘jumpy’ before a trial like this…?” Redford asked quietly.

“No…well…at least not that I’ve ever seen before…” said Susato, carefully playing with a loop of her hair.

“Me neither,” said Iris. “Normally when he’s a little anxious, his eyes dart around the room like no tomorrow. But this is definitely a new one…”

“Well it explains the way he was acting during breakfast this morning. With the way his eyes were rolling about in his skull, I thought they were going to roll out of his head or something. If I were trying to maintain eye contact with him, I think I’d’ve ended up giving up.”

The bailiff suddenly appeared from the entrance and called: “Now hearing the case of Regina V. Ninate, will all parties please report to courtroom no. 3 immediately!”

Just in time, Ryunosuke managed to get the papers together and get the court record back into its cardboard folder again.

“That’s our cue, Mr. Naruhodo,” said Susato.

“Well, I’ll be cheering you on from the dock. Good luck, you two!” said Redford with a bow.

Sholmes flicked the front rim of his hat. “And likewise, we’ll be cheering you on from the gallery!”

Iris flicked the front of her own forehead. “Good luck, everybody!”

——————————

The judge hit his gavel several times to bring the chattering of the gallery to a close, before clearing his throat and pushing his pince-nez glasses up his nose.

“Court is now in session for the trial of Redford Ninate!” he announced.

“The defence is ready, milord!” exclaimed Ryunosuke with a start.

“The prosecution is more than prepared, milord,” said Abidon, looking over the top of his half-moon glasses.

“And you,” continued the judge, “our six members of the jury, randomly chosen from citizens across the city of London, are you ready?”

The first juror, a young woman with her short and curly brown hair tied up with a red and white spotted handkerchief, rolled up a sleeve and flexed her bicep. “Ready and riveting to go!”

The second juror, a rather frail-looking old man dressed in a black suit and tall top-hat, stroked his sharp triangular chin with a bony hand. “I’m ready to commit the facts of this case to loving memory…kept in the grace of God’s right hand.”

The third juror, a familiar-looking Japanese man in a brown kimono with messy black hair and moustache, with several cats climbing over him, struck various poses. “I! AM! READY! BANZAI!”

The fourth juror, a tall man with black finely-combed hair in a widow’s peak and an aquiline nose, removed a pipe from the pocket of his dressing gown and began to smoke it. “I am ready to perceive the truth behind this case.”

The fifth juror, a man in a black tuxedo, top-hat with a purple band and a matching-coloured waistcoat stroked his moustache after he fiddled with his monocle. “I, the great Horace Velmont, will give everything that I can to this case!”

Finally, the sixth juror, a young girl with a black and white striped sweater, a mask covering the top part of her face and a black knitted cap on her head, said: “Yeah! I’m ready to go, guv’na!”

The judge nodded his head. “Excellent. Prosecutor Abidon, isn’t it?”

“Yes, milord?”

“You may begin with your opening statement.”

Ryunosuke looked around the courtroom nervously.

(It’s been a while since I’ve last been here. I just hope I’m able to get Redford off of these charges…for his sake…)

He looked over to Redford, sat in the defendant’s chair in the dock. And as he did so, Redford winked.

(Oh my heart…!)

“Mr. Naruhodo? Are you sure that you’re OK?” whispered Susato. “You’re looking at Red in the face.”

“Eh—sorry?”

“I said: ‘Are you OK? You’re looking a little red in the face’.”

“Is everything alright, defence?” asked the judge.

“Defence, you are aware that talking over the prosecution whilst it is attempting to make its opening argument is rude, arrogant and something that could lead to you being removed from this courtroom for contempt of court?” said Abidon with a glare. “I’m not sure how you Japanese like to do things, but it is the way we British people do things in this sacred court of law, and it is to be respected and heeded.”

“Sorry!” exclaimed Ryunosuke with a start. “Carry on. As you were…”

(Oh great! A smaller, jumped up, discounted-version of Lord van Zieks…that’s just what we really need right about now…)

“As I was about to say before I was so rudely interrupted…” said Abidon as he unfurled a scroll and held it in front of him. “The victim in this case was a Mr. Harris Thomas, a member of the same organisation as the defendant—known as ‘The Detection Club’, an organisation for crime writers to meet and work on their crime novels I believe.

“The victim had been expelled from the club for missed payment of membership fees, and a new member, Dexter Collins, was due to be inaugurated into the club the day before yesterday through a special ceremony. A ceremony that the defendant himself was placed in charge of organising and arranging.

“The defendant arranged ahead of time that he was to meet with the victim to formally inform him of his expulsion at the same time as began these ceremonial preparations. The prosecution, therefore, asserts that the defendant did, with malicious intent and malice of forethought, met with the victim beforehand and killed him unlawfully.

“He did so by hitting him repeatedly over the head with this—” Abidon reached under the prosecution’s bench and took out the alleged murder weapon, holding it high for the benefit of the court. “—this skull, which serves as a mascot for the club, affectionately referred to as ‘Norman’.”

“Oh my! An actual human skull? How frightening!” exclaimed the judge. “Still, how can you assert that it was the defendant who committed this horrifying crime?”

“Because, milord,” replied Abidon, “the defendant was the only one who had a key to this locked room mystery—the only door to the room is several inches thick and designed to be entirely impenetrable, as is the rest of the room. The windows are only able to open a few centimetres in width, and the entire room is located on the third floor of a building on High Window Avenue. And a cursory investigation has proven that there is no way for anybody to hide themselves within the room.”

“Very compelling evidence, I must admit.”

“HOLD IT!”

“If that is the case,” said the second juror, “I believe that we may finally be able to put this matter to rest. Dearly beloved, let us join hands together in prayer to mourn this defendant’s hopeless case. A truly, tragic death, indeed!”

With a knock of his hand against the jury bench, a fireball flew through the air and landed into the “guilty” side of the giant set of scales behind the judge, tilting them towards the right.

(Yikes! Already it’s not looking good!)

“An excellent opening argument indeed, Sir Prosecutor, but not necessarily one that would be enough to force a conviction in my opinion,” said the fourth juror, tenting his fingers together. “However, I would wish to hear more on this matter. It is only whenever we have eliminated every possible lead that we may know for certain what, exactly, has transpired.”

“I am inclined to agree with Juror #4,” said the judge with a nod.

Abidon nodded back in response.

“I acknowledge that particular fact, milord. As such, the prosecution would now like to call its first witnesses to the stand—Detective Athelney Jones of Her Majesty’s Metropolitan Police Service and Dr. Yujin Mikotoba, the police’s current acting chief coroner and medical examiner.”

[citizenscreen]

‘Tis the season to spread cheer and I’m doing my part by recommending classic movies, paying them forward in hopes that these memorable distractions take people’s minds off negative goings on. I’m asking that you join me, recommend your favorites and #PayClassicsForward on your blogs, by noting your recommendations in the comments or sharing across social media.

Let’s give the gift of movies.

Here’s the challenge…pick movie recommendations to the “12 Days of Christmas” theme as I’ve done below. Keep in mind that movie choices should be those you think would appeal to non-classics fans. Let’s grow our community and #PayClassicsForward

Have fun!

On the first day of Christmas, etc. etc…

One hat

The “one” listing is always a difficult one due to the fact that classics lend themselves to plenty of choices. That said, I came up with a category that encompasses important decades and several genre of film – the fedora. By following the history of the fedora in film you’ll be made privy to the best gangsters, greatest funny men, and most memorable lovers of Hollywood’s golden age. So here it is, a signature fedora:

Note that in researching my favorite fedora portrait I learned that trilbys are often mistaken for fedoras. Since experts seem to be confused between the two types of classic men’s hats that leaves little hope for me. I can’t say for sure whether Bogart is wearing a trilby in the above image, but he may well be. Descriptions of this type of hat explain the rims are shorter than your average fedoras. Either way, it’s a cool, suave look and Bogie rocks it.

From GQ: What’s the difference between a fedora and a trilby?

Answer: Traditionally a fedora has a wide brim and in the UK a wide ribbon band and bow. A trilby has a narrow brim and narrow ribbon, although there are some American trilbies that still have the wide ribbon.

  Two Fairbanks

Things were not simple between Douglas Fairbanks and Douglas Fairbanks, Jr. as it is for many families, but the son wore his father’s name proudly. I chose this father and son combination because if you watch their films you’ll get a healthy helping of everything from silent adventure to pre-code delicacies through some terrific television work. These are careers worth following.

  Three Trios

There are quite a few choices for memorable trios in film including Cattle rustlers Robert Hightower (John Wayne), Pedro “Pete” Rocafuerte (Pedro Armendáriz), and William Kearney (Harry Carey, Jr.) in John Ford’s 3 Godfathers. That one is definitely difficult to pass up. That said, I think the following trios are likely to be looked at less by casual fans and they all deserve attention. These are my choices of trios in movies:

They are such a joy to behold. I remember them fondly from my days as a child watching them on TV. It seemed then that they appeared in a million movies, but that wasn’t the case. Still, these siblings are a joy in films like Buck Pirates with Abbott and Costello and their film debut in Albert S. Rogell’s Argentine Nights (1940). The Andrews Sisters made 17 films, more than any other singing group and all are a terrific way to be introduced to the movies. If that record does not impress you, then maybe this one will: LaVerne, Maxene, and Patty garnered 113 charted Billboard hits with 46 of those reaching the top 10. That’s more than Elvis Presley or The Beatles.

  I have nothing against Disney. In fact, I enjoy their classic animated films immensely. Due to that I’m less than enthusiastic about their constant remakes, which – in my opinion – disrespects those wonderful, older film accomplishments. Today I pay tribute to one of them by way of a trio of glorious characters made in the memorable Disney vein we’ve all come to know and love, that combination of warmth and delightful comedy that permeate those wonderful films. These characters are Princess Aurora’s three good fairy godmothers Flora, Fauna and Merryweather in Disney’s 1959 classic Sleeping Beauty. They alone pay tribute to an enchanting legacy.

“Each of us the child may bless, with a single gift no more, no less.”

  The final mention here goes to three Russian envoys who have arrived in Paris to sell a fortune in jewelry, imperial jewelry, the money of which is to go to the Russian government, which is in need of cash. The three, Iranoff, Buljanoff and Kopalski (played hilariously by Sig Ruman, Felix Bressart and Alexander Granach, respectively) who are supposed to be doing work for the Russian government, immediately get caught up in the excesses of capitalism and fail to sell the jewelry.  Moscow then sends a special envoy to Paris to investigate what’s going on with the trio and the jewelry. The envoy is the rigid and humorless, Comrade Yakushova – Ninotchka (Greta Garbo). The charming Melvyn Douglas plays Ninotchka’s love interest in Ernst Lubitsch’s delightful comedy, but it’s the three envoys in the hands of Ruman, Bressart and Granach that make this movie among the greats in the annals of comedy. I just want to get to know them better and so should you.

Ninotchka with Iranoff, Buljanoff, and Kopalski

  Four Skippy Performances

It’s no wonder this wire-haired terrier was the highest paid canine star of his day. Often referred to as “Asta,” thanks to his successful appearances in The Thin Man movies, his real name was Skippy – and we love him to tears. Although I’m choosing only four of his film performances, Skippy never made a bad movie and starred opposite some of Hollywood’s biggest names. If you keep an eye out for Skippy’s filmography on TCM, you will no doubt be introduced to an astounding talent as well as a terrific movie. It’s guaranteed. My Skippy suggestions are:

Skippy as Asta in The Thin Man movies opposite William Powell and Myrna Loy as Nick and Nora Charles. I can’t imagine you haven’t seen The Thin Man (1934), but may not have given any of the sequels a try. If that’s the case you will be delighted by Skippy in any one of his key performances:

in ANOTHER THIN MAN

in AFTER THE THIN MAN

  Skippy is wonderful as Mr. Smith in The Awful Truth. Worth a custody dispute between Warriner and Warriner played by Cary Grant and Irene Dunne, this time Skippy is required to add straight drama to his repertoire as he is required to choose between his two humans right off the bat. There’s also plenty for him to do on the comedy front, however, so this one is a must-see.

forced to choose between the Warriners in court

front and center in the awful truth

  Skippy as George in Howard Hawks’ Bringing Up Baby opposite Katharine Hepburn and Cary Grant. Another terrific outing for our favorite pooch as he is central to action thanks to his burying abilities.

Holding his own in Hawks’ beloved screwball

  This sequel to Norman Z. McLeod’s 1937 hit Topper lacks some of the charm of its predecessor, but the talents of Constance Bennett, Roland Young, Billie Burke, Alan Mowbry, and Skippy make it well worth your time. Here, Skippy matched Bennett’s ghostly wit by ghostly wit in a role that stretches his talents to matters beyond this world and he approaches it with signature enthusiasm.

so famous he made it into this spectacular publicity photo with Constance Bennett

  Five Lords-a-leaping

No explanation needed.

Cagney

Nicholas Brothers

Kelly

Astaire

Six Vivien Leigh GWTW Tests

Gone With the Wind is celebrating its 80th anniversary on December 15 and, as the biggest, most famous movie ever made, it deserves at least a mention here.

On that day in 1939, Atlanta’s Loew’s Grand Theater was buzzing with Hollywood’s biggest names. It was such an occasion for Atlanta that the film’s opening was a 3-day event as Governor Eurith Dickinson Rivers declared a three-day holiday. Other politicians asked that Georgians dress in period clothing. A lot had happened in Hollywood leading up to that premiere though including the famous search for the film’s leading lady, the protagonist of Margaret Mitchell’s 1936 blockbuster novel, Scarlett O’Hara. Every female star it seems auditioned for the part. Among them were Bette Davis, Jean Arthur, Tallulah Bankhead, Joan Bennett, Claudette Colbert, Frances Dee, and Paulette Goddard who, as stories go, was close to being chosen. As we all know, however, Scarlett went to the lovely, British Vivien Leigh who possessed an outstanding talent. Leigh made the part her own and, along with the film, became tantamount to Hollywood royalty. To honor Vivien Leigh and her memorable Scarlett O’Hara here are six make-up and wardrobe test stills:

  Seven Justices

Judge James K. Hardy in the Andy Hardy movie series

Judge Margaret Turner in The Bachelor and the Bobby-Soxer

Judge Taylor in To Kill a Mockingbird

Judge Weaver in Anatomy of a Murder

Judge Henry X. Harper in Miracle on 34th Street

Judge Dan Haywood in Judgment at Nuremberg

Judge Chamberlain Haller in My Cousin Vinny

Eight Serials

Follow the links to watch episodes of these dramatically exciting serials. It might take a few chapters for you to get hooked, but you’ll get hooked.

The Perils of Pauline (1914) starring Pearl White

The Vanishing Legion (1931) starring Harry Carey and Edwina Booth

The Green Hornet (1940) starring Gordon Jones

Zorro Rides Again (1937) starring John Carroll

The Master Mystery (1918) starring Harry Houdini

Flash Gordon (1936) starring Buster Crabbe

The Phantom Creeps (1939) starring Bela Lugosi

Holt of the Secret Service (1941) starring Jack Holt

  Nine Ladies Dancing

Ann Miller

Ruby Keeler

Eleanor Powell

Lena Horne

Betty Grable

Vera-Ellen

Cyd Charisse

Ginger Rogers

Dorothy Dandridge

  Ten Directors

Watch their movies… live, love, learn, and laugh.

Michael Curtiz

Akira Kurosawa

William Wyler

Fritz Lang

Ernst Lubitsch

John Ford

Alfred Hitchcock

Mervyn LeRoy

Ida Lupino

Lois Weber

  Eleven Movies about Millionaires

Since I recommended movies about hobos in a previous year, I thought the time came for millionaires. There are many wonderful movies about the super rich, particularly during the Great Depression when audiences loved seeing the plight of these people play out for laughs. That theme made for some of film history’s best screwball comedies. The super rich, however, have lent themselves for entertaining movie fare ever since the movies began and in every genre. Check out this terrific list from Forbes spotlighting millionaires in movies.

As for me, I have quite a few favorites with millionaire themes that appeal to most others as well. These include such popular titles as The Philadelphia Story, the shenanigans of the Charleses in The Thin Man movies, My Man Godfrey, The Lady Eve, How to Marry a Millionaire, and movies featuring recognizable names like Charles Foster Kane and Bruce Wayne. For this purpose, however, I recommend lesser known, but worthy millionaire movie stories I’ve watched through the years – some in terrible condition, a few greats, and some for plain ole fun. Here are the 11 rich and classic…

Phil Rosen’s Extravagance (1930)

John G. Adolfi’s The Millionaire (1931)

Clarence G. Badger’s Miss Brewster’s Millions (1926)

Frank Tuttle’s Love Among the Millionaires (1930)

Mitchell Leisen’s Easy Living (1937)

Anthony Asquith’s The Millionairess (1960)

Robert Moore’s Murder by Death (1976)

William Asher’s Bikini Beach (1964)

Walter Lang’s I’ll Give a Million (1938)

George Marshall’s A Millionaire for Christy (1951)

Roy Del Ruth’s Kid Millions (1934)

EXTRAVAGANCE (1930_

THE MILLIONAIRE (1931)

LOVE AMONG THE MILLIONAIRES (1930)

MISS BREWSTER’S MILLIONS (1926)

MURDER BY DEATH (1976)

I’LL GIVE A MILLION (1938)

A MILLIONAIRE FOR CHRISTY (1951)

THE MILLIONAIRESS (1960)

KID MILLIONS (1934)

BIKINI BEACH (1964)

EASY LIVING (1937)

    Twelve Feature Acting Debuts

Some of my favorite and/or most memorable film debuts…

Jamie Lee Curtis in Halloween – effective after all these years.

Orson Welles in Citizen Kane – although Welles’ performance is what I find hardest to like in Kane, I cannot deny its impact and status among characters in film.

Audrey Hepburn in Roman Holiday – appropriate introduction for royalty in film and in life. She charms you from the first moment.

Eva Marie Saint in On the Waterfront – exclamation point to begin a stellar movie career.

Barbra Streisand in Funny Girl – a tour de force and a phenomenon

Peter Lorre in M – brilliant, nightmarish, heartbreaking. Described by director Fritz Lang as “one of the best in film history.” I agree.

Julie Andrews in Mary Poppins – Her debut should have been as Eliza Doolittle in My Fair Lady, but we’ll take this and so did she. Not only did Andrews win the Best Actress Academy Award for her portrayal of the magical nanny, but she won the hearts of the world in the process.

Timothy Hutton in Ordinary People – ordinarily superb.

Angela Lansbury in Gaslight – small part, big impact. Undeniable screen presence.

Edward Norton in Primal Fear – convincing and chilling.

Greer Garson in Goodbye, Mr. Chips – She wanted a worthy role as her screen introduction. She got it. She killed it – as she did from that moment on.

Eddie Murphy in 48 Hours – I love this performance highlighting the scope of Murphy’s talent.

I gave this final topic a lot of thought as there are many worthy contenders. For instance, I’m sure many would choose James Dean’s turn in East of Eden, as big a legend-ensuring performance as there ever was, but it’s not a favorite of mine. Tatum O’Neill’s performance in Paper Moon is another one I considered as were Marlee Matlin’s in Children of a Lesser God and Lupita Nyong’o heartbreaking Patsey in 12 Years a Slave. Finally, I adore Robert Duvall’s debut appearance in To Kill a Mockingbird. And I could go on and on. We just have an embarrassment of riches.

♥

Phew! There you have this year’s movie recommendations. I hope you enjoyed the list and that – in the spirit of Christmas – you take this challenge and…

#PayClassicsForward

Visit previous year’s lists as shown:

2015

2016

2017

2018

The Challenge: #PayClassicsForward for Christmas ‘Tis the season to spread cheer and I’m doing my part by recommending classic movies, paying them forward in hopes that these memorable distractions take people’s minds off negative goings on.

[johnnymundano]

The Medusa Touch (1978)

Directed by Jack Gold

Written by John Briley

Based on “The Medusa Touch” by Peter Van Greenaway

Music by Michael J. Lewis

Country: United Kingdom, France

Language: English

Running Time: 105 minutes CAST

Richard Burton as John Morlar

Lino Ventura as Brunel

Lee Remick as Doctor Zonfeld

Harry Andrews as Assistant Commissioner

Alan Badel as Barrister

Marie-Christine Barrault as Patricia

Jeremy Brett as Edward Parrish

Michael Hordern as Atropos - Fortune Teller

Gordon Jackson as Doctor Johnson

Michael Byrne as Duff

Derek Jacobi as Townley - Publisher

Robert Lang as Pennington

Avril Elgar as Mrs. Pennington

John Normington as Schoolmaster

Robert Flemyng as Judge McKinley

Philip Stone as Dean

Malcolm Tierney as Deacon

Norman Bird as Father

Jennifer Jayne as Mother

James Hazeldine as Lovelass

Gordon Honeycombe as Himself (Newsreader)

The first reason to watch The Medusa Touch is the presence of the acting colossus Richard Burton practically breathing fire in one of his great ‘70s roles (NB: Many of Burton’s great ‘70s roles occurred in movies which were themselves rather less than great). It’s to The Medusa Touch’s credit then that this isn’t the only reason to watch it.

The mighty Burton is enormous value in this as a misanthropic author with the titular touch; each of his scenes is a little set-piece wherein he gets to vent his considerable spleen at some aspect of “civilised” society. (Burton is so thunderingly awesome in his disdain that those implied speech marks seem to hang in the air undulating like heat off Texas tar at high noon.) Be in no doubt, the sheer venom with which Burton intermittently spits his vindictive bile is impressive enough to be worth the price of admission. As indeed is the sight of his megastar frame clad in cardigan and slacks like a surly granddad. Always remember - fashion is an uncredited character in all 1970s movies. A turn as gloweringly potent as the one Burton delivers here would threaten to overturn many a more demure movie but, luckily, The Medusa Touch is nothing if not audaciously fantastical.

Initially setting itself up as a murder mystery before launching itself into the realm of the delightfully outlandish, The Medusa Touch opens with John Morlar’s (Richard Burton’s) craggy Welsh head being beaten to a craggy Welsh pulp with a statuette of Napoleon by an unidentified intruder. Inspector Brunel (Lino Ventura) has to discover the motive and the culprit, while also convincing the audience that it is perfectly natural to have a French policeman working in London as part of some breezily suggested exchange programme. Clearly there only as a sop to the French investors Ventura nevertheless delivers a thoroughly committed performance, at first all business and rationality but swiftly forced to shade into credulousness as evidence of the supernatural mounts. 

Brunel soon discovers Morlar was consulting a psychiatrist, Dr Zonfeld (Lee Remick), as the bloviating malcontent feared a disturbing correlation between his wishing ill on people and ill suddenly thereafter being visited upon said people. Could it be possible that he, John Morlar, noted author of rancorous fiction might possess some unearthly power, a kind of…medusa touch? Or is he just losing his malicious mind over a series of mere coincidences? Perhaps this is the crux of the matter and the solution holds the key to the identity of his assailant? Only a series of flashbacks acted with two fisted panache by beloved 1970s British thespians can provide the answer.    

The Medusa Touch pulls that trick beloved of British ‘70s cinema whereby it promises a starry cast, but can only fulfil that promise and come in on budget by having each star onscreen for a minimal amount of time. Thus we have Derek Jacobi doing a camp literary agent for one scene, Gordon Jackson drily one-lining in a number of scenes (all obviously shot on the same day), and so on. Worthy of particular note is crumple faced acting treasure Michael Hordern’s turn as a fortune teller. His transformation from the breezily unctuous to the witlessly terrified, as he realises the nature of what is sat before him, is pure performing gold. Even Lee Remick is good value, occasionally sloughing off her usual perpetually dazed expression to actually inhabit the moment. Her role is also a refreshing departure from the typical ‘70s female role; she doesn’t start falling in love with Morlar and she is a far from a passive presence. It’s probably nothing to do with equality and more to do with the character being male in the source novel; but it’s an accidental step up anyway.

The Medusa Touch’s peculiarly British thrift even extends to its monolithic star, Richard Burton. In fact so terribly disfiguring are Burton’s wounds from the opening scene, that it looks like someone altogether less expensive spends most of the movie wrapped in bandages on the hospital bed in Morlar’s stead.  In retrospect its surprising to realise that Burton himself is a scarce presence in the movie, yet it feels like his acerbic presence saturates every scene, like brandy in a particularly rich Christmas pudding. This is mostly because he (obviously) dominates the few scenes he’s in, but also because he provides reliably rumbly narration for many scenes he’s not actually in; all of which were probably recorded in the snug of a pub in-between a couple of pints and a fistful of fags. It’s an incredibly economical use of such a gigantic star.  Burton gives you your money’s worth and no mistake.

As a story The Medusa Touch is tons of wittily scripted  pulptastic fun, building from a bashed in head to catastrophes of truly monumental proportions. While it does carry the stamp of a certain 1970s strain of campy naffness it is amazing how thrillingly convincing the magnificent cast make the delirious nonsense seem, right up the diabolical cliffhanger of an ending. Also, Burton’s giant face looming at you, intoning “I have a gift. A gift…for disaster!” in HD makes you glad you bought a TV you’ll be paying off for the next 12 months. But that could just be me.

[acsversace-news]

“We must be talked about, or we are nothing.” —Donatella Versace, to the Versace staff

“For me, being told ‘no’ is like being told I don’t exist. It’s like I disappeared or something.” —Andrew Cunanan, to Jeff Trail

“Is this normal? Is this normal enough?” —Gianni Versace to his sister Donatella, on creating a less unique version ready-to-wear version of the haute couture dress they designed together for her

“It’s just a name they made up to sound special.” —Andrew Cunanan to his mother Mary Anne, on Häagen-Dazs ice cream

“It needs confidence.” “It gives confidence.” —Donatella and Gianni, on the dress

“So you can hold your own at a dinner table conversation.” “I am the dinner table conversation.” —an escort agency owner and Andrew Cunanan, on Andrew Cunanan

“I want the world to see you in a way that you have never been seen before.” —Gianni to Donatella

“Oh, if they could see me now.” “Who?” “Everyone.” —Andrew Cunanan to Norman Blachford

“This dress is not my legacy. You are.” —Gianni to Donatella

“He’s a good boy. He’s always been a good boy.” —Mary Anne on Andrew Cunanan

“Ascent,” the seventh episode of ACS Versace, is the one where my admiration for what writer Tom Rob Smith has accomplished with his scripts and structure for the series shifted into something approaching awe. Returning to the Versaces’ world of high fashion for the first time since Episode 2 (their appearance in Episode 5 centered on Gianni’s coming out, not their work as designers), it creates a series of parallels between the the artist and the man who would murder him that are all the more striking for how different they are in intention and affect.

When Donatella tells her employees “We must be talked about, or we are nothing,” it’s a demand that they raise their collective artistic bar, creating things that are bold and new. When Andrew tells his friend and future victim Jeff that rejection makes him feel like he doesn’t exist, it’s a cry for help that neither Jeff nor Andrew recognize as such — a sign that if who he is isn’t working, he’ll simply steal ideas from others to create a man who gets told “yes” instead of “no.”

And that’s exactly what he spends the episode doing. When his Filipino heritage costs him a job with an escort agent who cloaks anti-Asian racism in capitalist realism — she says her clients don’t want “Asians With Attitude,” then mocks his promise to work harder than all her other escorts with “this isn’t a sweatshop, sweetheart” — he rechristens himself Andrew DeSilva, Portugese-Italian-American. When he hears a beautiful story about promising to build a loved one in pain a house where they can be safe from his new flame David Madson, he claims the story for his own and repeats it almost verbatim to Norman Blachford, his latest rich older conquest. Donatella and Gianni busted their asses to shift the fashion paradigm; Andrew works just as hard to shift into whatever paradigm other men have already created for him.

“Andrew DeSilva,” meanwhile, echoes the Häagen-Dazs incident, in which Andrew throws the off-brand ice cream his mother bought for them to the floor rather than eat an inferior product, even though he knows every last detail of how the name “Häagen-Dazs” is a fugazi selected by the company’s Polish-Jewish immigrant founder to sound vaguely Danish (it doesn’t, but you can convince people it does), both in tribute to Denmark’s actions in protecting Jews during World War II and to sound like a high-end dairy product to American consumers.

His angry shout of “I WANT THE BEST!” when he destroys the cheaper ice cream (which his mother, heartbreakingly, eats off the floor without batting an eyelash) shows that he feels as strong about this as Gianni does about the integrity of his showstopping design when Donatella suggests making a simpler version to increase sales to women who are less bold about being “the center of attention.” “Well then this is not a dress for them!” he yells, in part because he’s angry, and in part because his illness has begun to affect his hearing to the point of near-deafness. (When he breaks down and cries after realizing he suddenly can no longer hear his sister and his partner Antonio talking to him, it’s a magisterially upsetting performance from Édgar Ramírez…as is Darren Criss‘s performance when Andrew breaks down after his mother covers for him when he shoves her into a wall and breaks her shoulder blade.)

Both men are obsessed with having the best, and suspicious of normies. But Gianni is intent on creating greatness himself; he resents the faking of greatness to please the masses. Andrew, by contrast, will happily accept fake greatness if that’s what it takes to separate him from the hoi polloi.

Here we reach the nature of their statements about how others see them and their loved ones. Andrew weasels his way into the life of millionaire Norman Blachford, encouraging him to move to San Diego, purchase a preposterous house, and let Andrew live in and decorate it with him. When he stands on the balcony he didn’t buy, he believes it’s his ticket to the place where, as he told his mom, “They all look up at us, and we look down on them.” The triumph and the resentment are inextricably linked. That’s a world apart from Gianni, who genuinely doesn’t care how other people feel about him. He simply wants to express himself and celebrate everything he finds wonderful about his sister — her talent, her intelligence, her drive, her looks, her power — so that others can celebrate it too.

Gianni isn’t kidding when he tells Donatella she is his legacy. She’s his muse, his business partner, his co-creator, and (as we see in an adorable anecdote about holding her on his shoulders so she could watch a performance) his kid sister. If, as it seemed at the time, he might succumb to his illness, this brilliant and beloved woman will take their shared name and make it her own, carrying his company into the future by transforming it into her company. To quote another great show about a killer, family is everything.

Andrew thinks so, too. He brings up his father in conversation constantly, but tells a different story every time. He dotes on his mother, when he’s not leaving her behind or berating her ice-cream purchases or shoving her across the room. In a very real way he’s his mother’s son: He has all of her desperate need to be needed, but unlike her he has the cunning and charisma to do something about it. And given how different things might have gone had she reported the true origin of the injury she sustained at his hands, she winds up being just as crucial to the Cunanan legacy as Donatella is to Versace’s.

There’s one more thing to say about this remarkable piece of work, once again directed with stately elegance by Gwyneth Horder-Payton; one last parallel to point out. This one doesn’t involve the Versaces. It involves Lincoln Aston, the real estate and oil mogul Andrew hooks up with the night he first tracked down and made a move on his intended target, Norman. (Norman had a business trip to make the next night, and Andrew decided to make the best of it.) It also involves a drifter Lincoln picks up at a gay bar and brings home, who then does this to him:

Andrew witnesses the attack, and the killer witnesses him, but neither wind up saying anything about their encounter to the police after the killer flees and turns himself in. There’s a potentially obvious reason for that: the encounter most likely never happened, and it’s an invention of the show that rhymes the macabre coincidence of Aston’s murder by a stranger with the similar bludgeoning death Andrew inflicted on Jeff Trail years later.

But ACS Versace only invents when all the parts are right there in front of them. We spend the entire episode using the resonating frequencies of Andrew and the Versaces to illustrate how Andrew would do anything to be noticed, admired, loved, remembered, special; how fury kicks in when he isn’t; how he’ll lie, cheat, and steal ideas and identities to ensure his success. Why wouldn’t his career as a murderer require a little outside inspiration, just like everything else he does? Which brings us to the final parallel, a callback to an event that hasn’t even happened yet. The ambition, the ego, the anger, the chameleonic ability this episode portrays — they’re what transforms this…

…into this.

[deehollowaywrites]

A serendipitous confluence of events occurred over the past several days when one of my favorite television shows returned with an unexpected side character, the AWP writing conference took over downtown Tampa, and three Kentucky Derby preps ran, including a much-contested San Felipe Stakes.

If these seem disjointed, know that horses are always--shall we say--the glue of my spiritual landscape.

A few friends who also watch the soapy, sneakily feminist Lifetime twist-buffet UnREAL admitted that they didn’t want to spoil my delight at the inclusion of a jockey character, however briefly poor, much-maligned Norman was onscreen (I assume my Twitter reaction delivered). The show, which is a dramatized take on the Bachelor empire of reality TV, attempted to lampshade the ingrained humor of a petite man trying to win the affections of a statuesque woman by having all the characters involved remark on this apparent absurdity. Producers Rachel and Quinn, Everlasting’s star Serena, and Norman all know he’s being played for giggles. A few heated conversations and a drunken bathroom tryst later, Serena cuts Norman from her lineup of possible future husbands. Knowing the show, he might pop up again, but I was sorry to see only one episode devoted to exploring this particular corner of heteronormative masculinity.

“So you’re a jockey jumper, then?” asks the protagonist of Jason Beem’s racetracker novel Southbound. The narrative elaborates, noting that most of the women one might reasonably class as race-rider groupies are “at least five foot seven,” and then moves onto the more pressing topic of whether the woman in question, beautiful and popular paddock host Maria, might shift her interest to the horseplayer protagonist. Despite the novel centering around various racetracks, jockeys rarely show up; there are 44 instances of the word in a 400-page novel. When jockeys do appear, they’re at a distance, on horseback or in the saddling paddock, and seen through a specific, borderline-hostile lens: that of the horseplayer who mistrusts riders. Jockeys are there to be yelled at by spectators, to “stiff” bettors, to do anything other than their jobs, and most saliently, they’re “notoriously horny little creatures” who can be trusted neither to ride their horses honestly nor remain faithful to their partners. Simultaneously sexualized by their in-group and unsexed by external observers, (male) riders are shrouded in layers of marginalization. How is it possible for a rider to be trite joke fodder in one context and erotically imposing in another? In both the universes of UnREAL and Southbound, jockeys fuck women but they’re not meeting the parents--the difference lies in admission, in context required for comprehension.

“I’m an elite athlete!” Norman protests, standing on his five-five dignity, and later, as it seems Serena might be opening up to him, starts a spiel about how his profession is misunderstood. But Serena is intent on hiding their hook-up once she’s sober again, the show’s narrative turning ambiguous as to whether her shame is rooted in poor decision-making, loss of control, or the fact that the guy giving it to her doggy-style was half her height. Meanwhile, Maria the paddock host is casual about dating or sleeping with riders; protagonist Ryan is the one with opinions about it, and so the reader’s attitudes are directed by this point of view. It’s normative but distasteful, where the cast and producers of Everlasting find the idea of a jockey romantic lead neither normative nor tasteful.

Readers of the nonfiction canon of Thoroughbred writing will see reference to a few superstars of the sport edging into popular consciousness as viable romantic heroes. These nearly always fit within a certain profile: white, blond, all-American. Steve Cauthen, Chris Antley, Gary Stevens. Norman of UnREAL is, of course, white. Observers might also note that the current lineup of rock-star jocks is heavily Latino. The sport relies on sexy imagery to sell itself as glamorous and attractive but limits this imagery to female spectators and participants, largely sidelining the appeal of male participants. Barbara Livingston’s infamous beefcake calendar notwithstanding, racing is shot for, marketed to, and discussed almost totally within the realm of the heteronormative male gaze. It’s impossible to untangle the overarching reputation of jockeys from their status within the sport, their concurrent location at its center and its fringes. Physically, according to UnREAL and the accepted romantic tropes it trades on, riders cannot fit the profile of a romantic lead (they might tick the box marked abs with a bullet but they’re--gasp!--short). According to Southbound, reams of five-foot-seven-and-above women are willing to set this deficit aside, and starfucking can’t always account for taste, since low-level Portland Meadows riders get their fair share too.

It’s almost like the height-gap trope beloved of romance enthusiasts only applies to tall men and short women. Who’da thunk?

My favorite panel out of the two days I attended AWP’s writing conference was “Shooters Gotta Shoot: Voice in Sports.” Never have I felt so understood by a bunch of strangers! Author and panelist Katherine Hill noted that football players talk a lot, an offhand comment that kicked the hamster wheel of my brain into high gear. Do jockeys talk? Not where horseplayers can hear them, usually. What they say is filtered through the lens of what the trainer wanted from the race, how the odds stacked up, whether their horse won or lost. Their voices are reduced and fragmented from intersecting angles:

English may be a second language;

The sport of racing itself is a niche one, replete with specific, exclusive vocabulary;

Secretiveness prevails on the backstretch, while the pop-media view of Thoroughbreds relies on tired images of corruption, rigging, and under-the-table deals;

The riders’ place within their sport is layered with uncertainty, from physical danger to the tentative handshake that confirms a mount or takes it away.

If certain trainers had their way, jocks wouldn’t talk at all and no one would request it of them. They would be emotional whipping boys for the losing horse, emotionless mannequins for the winner. Within the shelves of fiction, it’s also rare to hear a jockey speak, likeliest in the crime-novel aisle under Francis. On Harlequin’s website, a search for “football” returns 142 titles, while “baseball” gets 94 options and “hockey” 73. These are the Big Three of sports romance, with basketball, soccer, tennis, NASCAR/F1, and all Olympics-related sports making minor showings as well. Horse racing, when it shows up, falls largely into historical-romance settings--a scandalous duchess at Newmarket, a sheikh’s stable girl--or again in crime and suspense, with horse-theft plots and murdered barn managers. Trainers appear as romantic hero/ines almost to a fault; out of Harlequin’s 9 results for “jockey,” only 2 titles feature an actual Thoroughbred jockey, and both characters are female. While I’m always pleased to read (and write) about female jocks, I don’t find it cynical to assume that these books exist in part because short women are palatable and appealing romantic heroines, while short men are perceived as having Napoleon complexes or little-guy syndromes, and generally being 200 pounds of testosterone in a 115-pound body. So who gets the happily-ever-after? Viking-esque hockey hotshots, American-beefcake ball players, and any hero who falls within an appropriate, narrow conception of heterosexual masculinity. Whose voices are reflected and amplified within the larger field of sports fiction? Whose experiences are projected as normatively male and typically American? Whose bodies are portrayed and received as alluring and desirable, and whose are operating within a historic context of abuse, control, and ownership?

I ground up my nerve to ask a question in that “Voice in Sports” panel, which I rarely manage because I’m a shy doofus. After the panelists’ conversation shifted to the imperial "we” of sports fandom, I asked Hill and poet Jason Koo to discuss how the collective love of fans for their sport can turn toxic--how the boundary is transgressed, at what point possessiveness becomes ownership and how that in turn affects how players are permitted to speak. I was thinking, as I am always thinking, of the relationships between horseplayers, trainers, owners, and jockeys; of that word, owner, and racing’s intertwined history with slavery; of a sport built on the underpaid and sometimes unpaid labor of people of color; of the vitriol casually displayed on the apron, as two days later at Tampa Bay Downs I’d listen to a man next to me yell SHITHEAD! at Julien Leparoux in a post parade. I said that racing is my sport of choice, waited for someone to say that racing isn’t a sport. I said after the panel, thanking Hill and Koo for their remarks, that I write romance--that I have marginalized my own voice in my choice of sport to write about, and my choice of genre to frame that sport, and my choice of mostly queer characters to people that sport’s fictional world.

Nonetheless Javier Castellano has his better story, his voice triumphing over Mike Smith’s. Nonetheless I write on, delighted in the space in which I’ve found myself, continue to find myself.

It’s my job as a romance writer to depict race-rider leads and love interests as exciting, sexy, and appealing. It’s my pleasure as a racing fan to depict jockeys themselves as multifaceted, compelling, and human.

[sass-cass-writes]

Floating Downtown Part One

Title: Deja Vu

Author: @sass-cass-writes / @sassy-castiels-angel

Description: Sammy its time to face your coulrophobia with Pennywise! With a string of disappearances occurring in Maine, the Winchester Brothers and the reader, a vivid Stephen King fan, try to stop the monster that snatches children and kills them every 27 years. But what will happen when the circus comes to town?

Characters: Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester, Reader, Beverly Marsh (mentioned) Edward ‘Eddie’ Norman and Cujo (mentioned)

Pairing: Sam Winchester x mute!Reader

A/N: Reader is speech impaired after being tortured by Abaddon’s right hand man and having her vocal cords destroyed. I’ve never written mute characters, so this is a first. If anyone has feedback, please give some!

Warnings: fluff(?), brief mention of torture, porn(?), clowns

tagging: @totallyluckycoffee / @dixonlover1605, @wonderavian

GIFS ARE NOT MINE

You knew you were dreaming, it wasn’t real. The padding under your build of the impala interior was moving indicating you were on the road. But no matter what you felt, its what you saw that scared the shit out of you. You were tied down. A bright beam of light focused onto your torn and beaten body. You throat was scarred, both internally and externally. The bruising peppered your skin; new and old, torn and bare. Your throat was shredded after screaming from the never-ending pain all because demons following Abaddon’s reign sought to find the Winchesters biggest weak spot in order to back them off and give warning- you. They reached over your restrained self and held up a knife.

“Now, (Y/N), this isn’t going to help if you don’t scream.”

You wriggled and whimpered as they brought it closer. All you could do was scream.

“(Y/N)…!” The familiar feel of the Winchester shook your shoulder lightly as he reached over the front seat. You jolted up and looked at him, his smile relieved. “Another nightmare?” Sam looked at you, curious yet considerate. You nodded. A heavy object rested on your chest and you saw the thick compacted pages in a soft back casing resting open. A copy, although battered and worn a little, of Stephen King’s “CUJO” was three quarters of the way into the thick novel. You grabbed the page corner and bent it, bookmarking the current negotiation of defeating a fucking rabid St Bernard dog on a rampage. Stephen King, by far, was your favourite horror author and best classic writer in your opinion. You’ve seen the original Stephen King movies, especially “IT” starring Tim Curry, that is with Sam clutching your arm tightly leaving with a sleeve of bruises and red welts.

You sat up smiling a little at the memory and stretched. You were driving along the road, trees and fields filling the rest of the serene landscape. Dean drove, as per usual, the guitar picks and drum beats of Creedence Clearwater Revival’s “Fortunate Son” filling the homy atmosphere of the impala. His brother sat beside him looking at the field ahead. You lean forward and onto the back of the front carseat and looked forward. Sam glances at you and smiles. “Hey beautiful.” You smile sheepishly and bring your hands up.

‘You know how I feel about you calling me that Sam.’  You sign your hands with a dorky smile. He smiles as he chuckles.

“Hey (Y/N) you’re our girl, we can’t deny the truth.” Dean states as he smiles and you whack his head in response, him laughing a little. Yes, you were mute. The only way you communicated was through sign language or writing it. Luckily for you, your mother was speech impaired and you learnt off her. You were 6 years younger than Dean, 2 younger than Sam. Your magical journey began with the Winchesters back in 2007, recently learning of Dean’s trip downstairs you were able to help him. You too were a hunter. Ever since laying some of your hoodoo shit to help keep hellhounds off his ass, they’ve welcomed you into their family.  You look at the files in Sam’s hands as he catches on. Even though you were mute, your hearing was sharp.

“Apparently, someones going around killing children.” Sam says.

“Changeling?” You sign. Sam shook his head as Dean spoke.

“Parents don’t seem to have bite marks and besides, theres no kids to base of the murders on.” Dean stated. “But we’re about an hour out (Y/N), skim through the file and see what you can pick up.” You nodded and leaned back taking the files out of Sam’s hands and leaning back. According to the various sources, kids had been going missing and nothing has been shown to give any signs of life except blood and flesh. Witnesses claim that there’s a serial killer. But leaving behind small pieces for an unsolved murder case? If you were a serial killer, you’d clean up everything, fuck you’d bleach the place. You guessed that’s where Sam and Dean got the hint that it wasn’t Hansel and Gretel gone rogue. Speaking of which, you were feeling for some candy, but were too tired. You were afraid to sleep, afraid of feeling the terrible pain you felt and the smell of fresh blood and somewhat phlegm.

-•••-

Dean was right. About an hour later you arrived in the small town somewhere along the west side of Maine. Streets were quiet but not too quit to give off suspicious behaviour. You,alike the boys were dressed in your FBI suit heading to the recent victim’s parents. Missing posters of children had plastered the telephone poles and it only made the situation worse. You only thought to yourself how long these kids had been gone, and worse, if they were even alive. The impala came to a halt, as you and Sam exited the 67 model. Dean headed to the sheriffs office whilst you and Sam walked up the stairs to the double storey eggshell home. You knocked on the door, you weren’t a social person, I mean it’s not like you could talk to them. It wasn’t long till a man opened the door, Mr Norman. He was a well built man, your best guess was mid-30’s, brown hair and blue eyes. As per usual, you let Sam do the talking.

“Mr Norman…?” The man nodded, your cue to show your 'FBI badges’. “I’m Special Agent Harrison, this is my partner, Special Agent Farris.” You nodded and waved a little as the man opened the door a little. “We want to ask you and your partner about your son.” The mans face changed, fell even at the mention of his missing son.

“I’m sorry,” Mr Norman said as he closed the door, but your hand was quick. You looked at him pleadingly, as Sam spoke again.

“Please sir, it won’t be long before another child goes missing.” Sam stated, as the man looked at you two. He sighed and let you in. The house was small, yet roomy and had the nice feel to it. Mr Norman lead the both of you to the lounge, sitting across from you, his face fighting to break out in pain. “Sir, what happened the night that Tommy went missing?”

“Charlie and I, we went to the park to meet up with Tommy after school.” He ran his fingers through his greying hair.

“Charlie, your wife?” Sam asked him pointing to a picture of the three smiling. You looked at him as Mr Norman looked up.

“Sister, my wife died in childbirth.” Mr Norman stated as he sighed and looked up.

“My apologies.” Sam followed quickly.

“He was talking about how he met this nice man called Bob, how he had balloons and offered fun and games.” Mr Norman looked down. “We thought it was a visitor to the school, but it was him.”

“Him Mr Norman?” Sam asked.

“Call me Eddy.” He said as he nodded. “This isn’t the first time it’s happened, the same thing happened when I was a kid, about 30ish years ago. Back then we called it 'Sewer Creep’, but at seven anything could’ve been the 'Sewer Creep’.” You and Sam nodded as you noted this down.

“I must ask,” Eddy piped up. “Are you mute Miss Farris?” You looked up at him and nodded, signing to him your mind, Sam chuckling a little. “What did she say?” Eddy asked.

“She said; ”Just because I’m mute, does not mean I cannot speak my mind nor be a smartass.“ That was the non-sarcastic, respectful version. What you meant to say was-

"Anyways Eddy, what happened after you went home?” Sam asked.

“It was normal, we had dinner, we played. But the last time I saw him was when I put him to bed. And blood was on the sheets.” His breath started to hitch as tears fell, your heart stung a little.

Sam asked him more routine questions and you walked around finding photos of the family. Then one caught your eye, they were at a circus. Tommy would’ve been three at least as he cried, the sister holding him as Eddy stood on the other side. Behind was crowds of people, but one thing stood out. Your memory jiggled at the sight of the foreign figure. You clicked your fingers, Sam walking over as you signed a question.

“Look familiar?” He looks at the photo and his face pieces the puzzle together.

“Rakshasa?” Sam breathed, but you shook your head and signed.

“Pattern doesn’t fit.” He nodded and looked at Eddy.

“Tommy didn’t like the circus?” Sam asked. Eddy smiled a little.

“Tommy loved the circus, he hated clowns.”

“I can relate.” Sam smirks a little, thanking him for his time as you and Sam left and to the station.

“I say we head to the motel and meet with Dean, head out and eat.” Sam stated, you nodded. You walked past a telephone pole, the missing posters scattered.

-•••-

“Okay kiddies!” Dean exclaimed as he burst through the door, his FBI coat flailing as he carried files and bags of food. You laid down on the bed, your beloved book in you arms as you look up. “We’ve got disappearances dating back 27 years, funnily enough a cycle.

"We’ve had a few witnesses, went to them but they were locked in a mental asylum. One guy that stood out said he saw a bright light before his friend disappeared and heard his screams.

"Oh and the best part, he’s got coulrophobia.” Dean said, smiling smugly at Sam as the younger Winchester shifted and looked down.

“Coulrophobia?” You signed. “As in-”

“Fear of clowns.” Sam says as he looked at the file. You smirked.

“I think it’s a rakshasa.” Dean stated, you shook your head. “Then no. We’ve got files, food and pay-per-view porn. What first?”

“Food.”

“Food.”

“Then we can read the files and watch porn.” Dean smirks as Sam scoffs.

“So I can freak out or not jerk off?” Sam counteracted.

“Dude, (Y/N), has better control than you.”

“No porn boys.” You signed. Dean pouts mockingly. Sam laughs a little and kisses your forehead as you walked to them. Every time Sam touched you, a surge of happiness ran through your body. You’d lean into him, he’d stroke your hair, you’d both be smiling.

You sat down and ate as you read through the files. Sam and Dean joking a little, they look at you briefly as you read, Sam smiling a little. You scrunch your nose, the way the boys find too adorable as you read.

“Guys?”

They look up, Dean’s mouth full of food, in which earned him the nickname squirrel.

“Have you gone and seen a Beverly Marsh?” Sam looks at Dean as he swallows the chewed food and shakes his head.

“Never heard of the gal.” Dean says sipping his drink.

“Because she moved out of Maine. According to a police statement filed by her doctor;” You sign throwing the file on top of Dean’s half eaten burger, him frowning. “Beverly was experiencing psychological and emotional trauma from  her abusive father and a somewhat monster.”

At the words 'monster’ Dean and Sam perked their ears. “We’re listening.” They both said in unison. Laughing a little, you look up and point to the file.

“According to the file she now lives Chicago, Illinois. I’m going to find her.” You communicate as you stand and walk to your bed, starting to pack.

“Where do you think you’re going Miss (Y/L/N)? Chicago’s a day and half, two days max out.” Dean said standing up, crossing his arms.

“She thinks she’s going to Illinois alone.” Sam said standing up as you pack. “We’re coming (Y/N).” You shake your head and flick your fingers into the alphabet.

“NO”

“Can I come at least?” Sam asked and you looked at him. He walks to you with the puppy eyes. The damn puppy eyes.

“I can go by myself Sam, I can look after myself.”

“We know you can (Y/N), but how exactly are you going to talk to them?”

“I’ll get a translator.” Sam smirks and scoffs.

“(Y/N),” Sam said walking to you as he stands over you. “I AM your translator. I’m coming and that’s final.”

You growl a little and scrunch your nose, squint your eyes and stare up at him. Sam laughs a little and ruffles (Y/H/C) waves. “You don’t scare me, baby girl.” You roll your eyes at the name and sigh, nodding falling into his suggestion. Sam smirks and walks to his bed packing his bag. This all had seemed scarily similar, like Deja Vu. As if you’ve hunted down a psycho before that snatched children from their homes in bloody messes at midnight.

I mean, whats worse than an unknown monster killing children?

[aion-rsa]

Spider-Man Villains Who Could Join the MCU

http://bit.ly/2WNee8H

Mysterio is in Spider-Man: Far From Home, but there are plenty of others we still haven't seen on the big screen who would work in the MCU.

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Considering how many villains already appeared in the five Spider-Man movies released since 2002, not to mention the ones we already know are coming to Spider-Man: Far From Home, a fan would think that Hollywood has covered all the great Spider-Man villains (just think of how many were set up or teased in The Amazing Spider-Man 2, for example). With Marvel and Sony promising at least one more Spidey movie after Spider-Man: Far From Home, not to mention the Spider-Man spinoff movies Sony is readying with Venom 2, Morbius, and others, Kevin Feige, Amy Pascal, and friends are eager to give audiences something they haven't seen before...and that means new villains.

Since Spidey has one of the greatest rogues' galleries in all of comics, there are still plenty of quality bad guys who we haven't seen on the big screen yet, not just in the MCU movies. Sure, it's inevitable that Marvel Studios will want to tackle Norman Osborn again at some point, but since he's already been such a presence in five other movies, we don't think we need to go into details about that here. So here is a look at the Spider-Man villains who might share the screen with Tom Holland as we go forward...

Stegron, the Dinosaur Man

With ties to the Lizard, Stegron might be obscure, but he could be an intriguing possibility for a future Spidey film. Who wouldn’t want to see Spider-Man fight dinosaurs? Stegron controls dinosaurs, which if you think about it, might be the most useless power ever. Let’s say Oscorp creates dinosaurs and then creates Stegron. It could happen right? There’s some strange things going on behind Oscorp walls.

read more - Everything You Need to Know About Spider-Man: Far From Home

Let’s not pretend that Spidey fighting a T-Rex wouldn't make the five year old in all of us hyperventilate with excitement.

Videoman

Yeah, Videoman. To any child of the '80s, Videoman was as integral a part of the world of Spider-Man as the Green Goblin or Doctor Octopus. Videoman was introduced in the first season of Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends and he trapped our intrepid heroes in a stand up arcade console.  

read more: Complete Schedule of Upcoming Marvel MCU Movies

Listen, in the '80s, there wasn’t a comic film every two months, or a bunch of TV shows featuring our beloved comic icons. We took what we had, and what we had was Videoman, and we loved him.

Man Wolf

Poor John Jameson was sort of wasted in his first and only film appearance in Spider-Man 2. The son of J. Jonah Jameson was left at the altar by Mary Jane and then never heard from again. An American hero and astronaut deserves better, especially one that has a tendency to transform into a werewolf. J.J.J. will probably be reintroduced in the new Marvel Spider-Man movie so it would be a simple matter to introduce his son, a character Spidey rescued in his very first issue back in 1963.

read more - Every Marvel Easter Egg in Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse

When Jameson is exposed to the Godstone during a space mission, he was transformed into the Man Wolf. At first, Man Wolf was a fairly typical werewolf, but then he took to the cosmos and found that in space; he could control the wolf and became a galactic champion called Stargod. Yes, he was like Flash Gordon, but a werewolf. Can you say: solo movie?

Speed Demon

The Flash is a TV star while Quicksilver has appeared in two, count 'em two, film franchises. As all this proves, everyone loves a speedster and with the comic’s heroic runners present and accounted for across all platforms of media, maybe it’s time fans get to experience a faster than light douchebag like Speed Demon.

read more: A Guide to the Many Spider-Men of the Spider-Verse

In the pages of The Superior Foes of Spider-Man (you need to go read this comic), the Speed Demon stole a puppy. At super speed. He’s a dick. And if featured in a future Spider-Man film he can be a high profile dick.

Swarm

He’s a Nazi made of bees, what else do you need to know?

read more - Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse Post Credits Scenes Explained

Who can forget his signature cry of “SWWWWARRRRMMMM” from his appearance on Spider-Man and his Amazing Friends? Swarm could be an Oscorp experiment gone horribly wrong. I mean really wrong. I mean "Nazi made of angry bees wrong." In a cloak.

Big Wheel

Of all the villains that have not yet appeared in a Spider film, none are more worthy… no, I can’t DAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Big Wheel, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, what an ass. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I’d like to buy a vowel HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Look at this schmuck HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Ok, moving on...

Hydro Man

First appearance: The Amazing Spider-Man #212 (1981)

Created by Dennis O'Neil and John Romita, Jr.

Seriously, this list could almost be called the top 25 villains created by John Romita Sr and Jr...jeez, what a creative force of nature that family is. Anyway, we got to see Sandman featured in Spider-Man 3, and while that isn’t the best Spidey movie of the bunch, the Sandman scenes were really powerful and visually stunning. If you think about it, Hydro Man has a pretty terrifying power, the ability to drown anyone, anywhere, or sneak into any facility through a faucet or a, eww, toilet.

read more: The Best Spider-Man Team-Ups

The comics never really gave Hydro Man his due, but let’s all be honest, the second you saw the water aliens in The Abyss back in the day, you thought of old Hydro Man. And who can forget, Amazing Spider-Man #217 (1981), where Hydro Man and Sandman bonded to form the gigantic Mud Thing, an event so traumatic, it led to Sandman reforming, another seminal Spider event that would make good film fodder.

And think of the Poland Spring endorsement deals!

Spider Queen

Lots of classic villains on this list, but other than Morlun, there’s not a great deal of modern baddies. Well, the Spider Queen is certainly deserving of consideration. The Queen was originally the first female Marine to go into combat in World War II, when she was exposed to radiation from an atomic bomb test; her “insect gene” is activated. She wants to transform the world’s population into arachnid hybrids like her, and was the big bad in Dan Slott’s fantastic Spider-Island event.

Jack O’Lantern

Another heir to Green Goblin legacy, the villain known as Jack O’Lantern started out as something of a joke. There have been a number of Jacks over the years, and they have gotten more deadly as time has marched on. The original Jack, Jason Macendale took up the legacy of the Hobgoblin, but it’s the newest Jack O’Lantern introduced in the pages of Venom, that has become one of the most horrific new villains in the Marvel Universe.

read more - Every Marvel and MCU Easter Egg in Spider-Man: Homecoming

As a child, this new, unnamed Jack O’Lantern murdered his own parents under orders from the Crime Master and claims to have killed all the former wearers of the Jack O’Lantern suit. Ties to the Goblin legend and ties to Venom, and a cold blooded psychotic freak, this often overlooked creep show has all the makings of an A-list film villain.

Hammerhead

Spidey’s war with organized crime is on hold while he deals with Oscorp and their future cadre of enhanced killers, but crime is still rampant and the tattooed killer is still out there. Hammerhead is the most Dick Tracy-esque of all Marvel villains, and might be a bit anachronistic for the big screen, or he might be the exact thing future Spidey films need to be different.

read more: The Craziest Venom Moments in Marvel History

How many hi-tech villains can one franchise have? Maybe we need a little old school evil, and this cigar chomping old school douchebag fits the bill.

Tarantula

What’s cooler than a mustachioed mercenary with pointy shoes? Pretty much nothing really, am I right?

Tarantula was one of the cooler Spidey villains introduced in the '70s and in the pages of the comics, he sometimes transforms into a Man Spider, and we all know how much Hollywood likes its giant beasties.

read more: Venom Comics Reading Order

C’mon, it’s a dude with a bandana mask and stabby boots, how is that not marketable?

The Beetle

The original Beetle was created by Carl Burgos, the creator of Marvel’s original super-hero the Golden Age Human Torch. That’s some cool stuff right there.

Anyway, the Beetle is a unique visual with his odd extendy fingers, his unique helmet and his funky wings. The original Beetle armor would have a really cool retro vibe if put in the film, or Marvel can go the route of the Ultimate Spider-Man cartoon by making the Beetle a silent, armored killer.

read more: Complete Guide to Easter Eggs in the Venom Movie

Whatever way they go, as all Thunderbolts fans know, Abner Jenkins becomes more than a one note villain when he turns to the side of the angels while a member of the T-Bolts, and that little added wrinkle could be just the edge the Beetle needs to be a pretty compelling movie villain.

Sin Eater

When Sin Eater arrived on the scene in the early '80s, things got very real for Spider-Man and his world. The Death of Jean Dewolff was the first major work by legendary writer Peter David and it remains one of the most intense, grounded, and violent Spider-Man stories of all time. Any true Spider-Fan should be giddy with anticipation at the prospects of seeing the Sin Eater on the big screen.

read more: Who is Carnage?

It can be argued that the Sin Eater saga was when Spidey grew up and the saga also started Eddie Brock on his dark path as the photojournalist wrongly accused the wrong man of being the Sin Eater. Any movie focused on Sin Eater would be a departure for the Spidey films, but it would certainly make the new Marvel Spider-Man movie stand out from the crowded superhero pack.

Vermin

Spider-Man movies certainly like their human/animal hybrids, and there are none of those combos more horrifically disturbing than Eddie Whelan, the creature known as Vermin. In the comics, Vermin was created by none other than Arnim Zola, who we've gotten to know in movies like Captain America: The Winter Soldier and on Agent Carter.

Vermin was the perpetual victim, a misunderstood and tormented creature suddenly given unspeakable power. Like Curt Conners’ ability to control lizards, Vermin can control rats and stray dogs, so there is film precedent for Vermin’s abilities. Vermin also ties into the classic Kraven’s Last Hunt storyline, and wouldn’t we all like to see that story adapted to the screen with Vermin along for the ride!

Tombstone

Lonnie Lincoln, albino gangster and cold-blooded killer, has been one of Spidey’s most enduring street level foes. In fact, when Daredevil absconded with Kingpin, Tombstone took over as head gangster of Spidey’s world.

read more - Complete Guide to Marvel Easter Eggs in Spider-Man: Homecoming

Tombstone is an incredible visual and is a very different animal than the science freaks Spidey has been fighting in the recent set of films. The comic Tombstone has a deep connection to Daily Bugle editor in chief Robbie Robertson, so once the Bugle crew is introduced in earnest; it could also be time to introduce the iciest gangster in Spidey history, the stone cold killer, Tombstone.

Carrion

Whoa Nellie, is this a complicated one. Carrion started out as the rotting clone of Miles Warren (more on him in a bit) but the Carrion persona ended up being wielded by two other sick and twisted individuals. A future film could jettison all that and just focus on the villain’s horrific power set, the ability to turn organic matter to dust, telepathy, levitation, telekinesis, and intangibility.  

Read more: We Are Venom: The Many Characters Who Wore the Symbiote

No matter who wielded the power, Carrion was a freak of science, a lab-created nightmare and could be Harry Osborn’s ultimate weapon against Peter Parker or a master villain in his own right. Carrion was also a running buddy of Carnage and could fit into any saga that utilizes that particular maniac, like teaming John Wayne Gacy and Jeffry Dahmer, but with really, really scary super-powers.

Morlun

Not every idea J. Michael Straczynski presented in his run on Amazing Spider-Man was gold (Gwen and Norman Osborn having an affair my webbed butt), but the introduction of the villainous Morlun was the stuff of legend. When Morlun appears, fans get the feeling that Spidey cannot win; he is the ultimate test for Peter and one that Peter has barely survived. Morlun is the devourer of those with Spider powers, an ancient evil that does not rest.

read more: Venom Post-Credits Scenes Explained

To Morlun, the ol' Web-Head is a totem, a being that carries an animal spirit, and to Morlun, these beings are dangerous and must be destroyed. As we all know, there are plenty of totemistic beings in the Spider film universe, which could be just what Morlun needs to make his big screen debut. Morlun would up the ante for Peter, a foe that really tests Peter’s power and will.

Plus, Morlun rocks an ascot, so you know he’s badass.

The Jackal

The mad geneticist Miles Warren, a former professor of Gwen and Peter, cloned poor Gwen, kicking off a cycle of torture for Peter Parker that ended with one of the most infamous stories of all time, The Clone Saga. The Jackal was in love with Gwen and couldn’t live without her; he blamed Peter for her death and created a clone of Gwen and later, a clone of Spider-Man himself. 

Okay, maybe he's best saved for later movies...

Chameleon

He was the first costumed villain Spider-Man ever faced. Chameleon has deep familial ties with Kraven the Hunter, a character who has also never been seen on film. Whether with Kraven or solo, the Chameleon is one of Spidey’s deadliest foes because he could literally be anyone. The first Spider-Man villain definitely deserves some film love, and his power set would bring some unique challenges to the big screen.

Hobgoblin

Spider-Man’s greatest foe of the post Bronze Age era. Many different men have worn the mask of the Hobgoblin to bedevil Peter Parker for decades. Whether it was the original Hobgoblin Roderick Kingsley or the arrogant scoundrel Phil Urich of the modern era, the image of the Hobgoblin has always caused Spidey fans’ hearts to skip a beat. The Hobgoblin has always been the next step in the Osborn heritage of evil. Maybe the MCU Spidey movies can distinguish themselves by skipping the "green" and going straight for the "hob."

read more - Spider-Man: Far From Home - Who is Mysterio?

Marvel needs a new kind of villain for their movies, and could feature different men behind the Hobgoblin mask. Seriously, who can forget the cover of Hobgoblin’s first appearance? The villain ripping an effigy of Spider-Man in half is burned into the brains of Spider-fans forever. Not many villains secure their legacy on their first cover appearance alone, but Hobgoblin did and it's time that legacy extended to other media.

The Scorpion

Yeah, we know, Michael Mando already showed up as Mac Gargan in Spider-Man: Homecoming and his villainous future was teased even further in that movie's post-credits scene. But until he's in that green suit, it doesn't count! Possibly the longest running and most important Spidey villain not yet featured in a film, the Scorpion has deep ties to Spidey, Venom, and the freshly sort-of introduced J. Jonah Jameson. Mac Gargan was a salty dude, a skell that was hired by Jameson to at first track Peter Parker and then, to be grafted into the Scorpion battle suit, a suit which he got trapped in, making him into a freak and a bitter killer. The hate filled Gargan dedicated his life to destroying both Spidey and Jameson. The insect motif, the quest for vengeance, the obsession, all these aspects of the Scorpion would make Gargan a perfect screen villain. 

Spider-Man: Far From Home opens on July 2.

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The Lists

Books

Marc Buxton

Jun 18, 2019

Marvel

Spider-Man: Homecoming

Spider-Man: Far From Home

Spider-Man

from Books http://bit.ly/2x2TXlo

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6 Characters Whose Lives Fell Apart In Little Known Sequels

We don’t usually get to find out what happened to our favorite fictional characters after their stories wrapped up. For all we know, the Breakfast Club gang formed an actual gang, beat the principal to death, and now they’re all in jail. Checking in on the heroes of your youth isn’t always as easy as going on Facebook and typing the names of your old high school friends — but the results can be equally depressing. If you thought Luke, Han, and Leia’s lives turned to dogshit in the new Star Wars, that’s nothing compared to how …

#6. Indiana Jones Became A Sad, Creepy Grandpa

Unless you’re a Nazi, a Communist, or the parent of one of his students, chances are you love Indiana Jones. He’s like the dad you always wanted, if you wanted your dad to be cool, handsome, and best friends with a homeless Chinese boy for some reason.

The Depressing Epilogue:

You might think that the movie where Indy meets aliens was the most recent (and most undignified) place we left the character, but that’s not exactly correct. Those who grew up in the ’90s might remember a little show called The Young Indiana Jones Chronicles, which followed Indy’s early adventures. One jazz-themed episode even featured a cameo from a saxophone-playing Harrison Ford.

“Where d’ya light this thing?”

While the show was primarily a prequel, it was bookended by scenes set in the ’90s, where we see Indy the way we never wanted to: as an angry, senile old man. In the first episode, he’s hanging around a museum (presumably yelling about how all the artifacts in the museum belong in a museum), where he promptly frightens and threatens to “clobber” two young children. To be fair, at this stage in his life, youths are way scarier than Nazis.

Then he punched a Latino kid, yelling “You will not betray me again, Satipo!”

Indy then forces the kids to listen to a story from his youth — but not one of the awesome ones about the Holy Grail or the Ark of the Covenant, because these little jerks don’t deserve them. This setup is how most of the episodes play out: Old Man Indy just starts reciting stories to anyone who will listen as he runs painfully banal errands. One involves Indy arguing with, then hitting on, a female postal worker.

Probably the most exciting moment comes in an episode in which Indy goes from fighting the forces of evil to fighting a teenage donut store clerk, putting the teen in a chokehold with his cane for sassing an old lady.

His bullwhip had already been confiscated by the manager of the local McDonald’s.

As punishment, he tells the clerk yet another story from his youth … allowing enough time for the cops to show up and arrest him. But surely the episode doesn’t end with a feeble Indiana Jones being shoved into a squad car? He makes a daring escape, or they let him off because he tells them an amazing story, right?

Not sure if adding John Williams’ music would make this more or less sad.

Nope, that’s seriously the end of that episode. Others found the adventurous Indiana Jones going to the hospital for a bee sting, yelling at his grandson for playing rock music, and going to see a psychiatrist because his kids think he’s crazy and want to put him in a goddamn home. Though to be fair, if your dad kept ruining Christmas dinners by insisting that he once saw ancient god lasers melt the faces off Hitler’s army, would you have any other choice?

If all this doesn’t seem familiar to you, it’s probably because George Lucas had these segments removed for the show’s home video release, proving that he can use his DVD-meddling powers for good instead of evil. Unless he wants to re-shoot them with present-day Harrison Ford, in which case … uh, sorry for the Indy 5 spoilers, everyone!

#5. Will Smith’s Independence Day Character Died Off-Camera (In The Sequel’s Ad Campaign)

Independence Day: It’s the beloved ’90s blockbuster that had the balls to make a direct comparison between a global alien invasion and a holiday where Americans drink beer and light things on fire to commemorate the time they told the British to fuck off. One of the most memorable characters was NASA reject, Air Force pilot, and noted welcomer-to-Earth Steven Hiller, played by Will Smith.

Who was so cool, you almost forgot he was one letter away from invading Poland.

The Depressing Epilogue:

As you probably know, Independence Day recently got a sequel, Independence Day: Resurgence, starring Jeff Goldblum, Brent Spiner, and the boxcar hobo that killed Bill Pullman and stole his identity.

Alternatively, he came down with the Santa Clause curse.

Notably absent from the cast of characters fighting back against the lazy-ass aliens (who apparently wait 20 years between invasion attempts) is Captain Hiller. Turns out Will Smith was “too expensive” to hire back, so they naturally had to find some graceful way to explain the character’s absence. And by “graceful,” we mean they decided to be petty assholes and brutally kill him off in the small print of some viral marketing.

Couldn’t they just, we don’t know, send him off to live with some relatives in an affluent Los Angeles neighborhood?

Yup, thanks to the movie’s website, we found out before the movie even came out that Hiller blew up in a freak accident while test piloting a jet infused with alien technology. Not fighting some stranded aliens, or taking out an alien landmine to save a bus full of children — it was a random malfunction. Even Randy Quaid got a better death scene. Worse still is the decision to let us all know his tragic fate through some dumb publicity campaign. Not surprisingly, Smith was bummed to find out that his character died. Aw, shit. Nobody tell him about Muhammad Ali.

#4. Kevin McCallister’s Family Immediately Fell Apart (And His Dad Became A Real Piece Of Shit)

The Home Alone movies taught kids a whole slew of lessons, from the importance of self-reliance to the fact that you should ignore any fears you might have and befriend even the scariest of strangers.

Shockingly, the following is not about how she died of E. Coli.

But like every ’90s sitcom and Fast & Furious movie, the real message is the importance of family. Even when your family’s parental neglect is bordering on criminal, you’ve got to love them, right?

The Depressing Epilogue:

Those who thought Kevin McCallister’s story ended back in the ’90s are sorely mistaken. While Home Alone 3 centered on brand-new characters — presumably to show that more than one family treats their children like garbage — in 2002, the powers that be crapped out a straight-to-video sequel, Home Alone 4. Once again, the story follows Kevin, who is somehow younger than the last time we saw him, and sounds and looks completely different. They couldn’t even be bothered to find a kid with roughly the same hair color.

The trauma of the previous movies clearly stunted his development.

Despite the fact that Home Alone 2 ended happily, Kevin’s parents seem to have immediately split up in its aftermath. Home Alone 4 finds Kevin spending Christmas with his dad, who’s now a rich douchebag living in a swank mansion with his hot young fiancee. Yup, midlife crises can be a real paint can to the face of your family.

Buzz looks somewhat different too, and now works as a butler.

Soon, Kevin’s old nemesis Marv shows up — shorter, clean-shaven, and with his new wife instead of Harry. Because in this movie full of fractured relationships, even the Wet Bandits can’t seem to make it work. Love is dead, people.

Alternate theory: He murdered Harry for his hat and scarf.

Here’s the really fucked-up thing: Kevin is never accidentally left home alone. He’s left alone, sure, but only because his tool of a dad has more important shit to do. And most upsettingly, when the house is eventually broken into, his dad blames Kevin for the mess. He literally says: “You’re out to destroy my relationship.”

Our reaction, too.

That’s right: Two adults break into his house and threaten the life of his child, and his reaction is to accuse Kevin of cockblocking him. A parent not believing a child when he tells them he’s been attacked by a stranger makes abandoning him on Christmas seem like a Norman Rockwell painting by comparison.

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/6-characters-whose-lives-fell-apart-in-little-known-sequels/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/172603142227

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Only a handful of movies have been announced for the 2018 Turner Classic Movies Film Festival (TCMFF), but excitement builds anyway as tickets are scheduled to go on sale in just a few days. The 2018 festival is scheduled for April 26 – 29 and many of us have been waiting for 2018 passes since this year’s event concluded. It’s a vicious cycle we enjoy perpetuating. In any case, mark your calendars for 10AM ET. on Tuesday, November 7 if you’re a Citi member for the exclusive pre sale and for 10AM ET. November 9 for the public sale. Get all of the details you need at TCM. You’ll note, by the way, that passes for this festival are not cheap and overall expenses can be prohibitive, but if you’re a classics fan and have never attended TCMFF it’s a sacrifice worth making at least once. You can read any number of posts about past experiences by many bloggers to know why. Now to 2018…

Along with the anticipation of the festival itself is the yearning for our favorite movies to be screened. I’ve yet to be disappointed with a screening in the five years I’ve attended the festival, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have ideas about what I would love to see. This year is no different. The chosen theme for TCMFF 2018 is Powerful Words: The Page Onscreen, which is intended as a “celebrating the representation of the written word on the silver screen.” When you consider that all movies start out as written words the possibilities for screenings are endless. That said, I still have had specific titles swirling around in my head since the dates and theme were announced and I’d like to share those recommendations with you. I should mention that I planned the list to contain 10 suggestions, but as you’ll see I failed miserably at limiting the list to so few. In fact, it was a strain on my heart to keep it at a svelte 21.

These are not listed in order of preference and I also did not take into account whether any have been screened in previous festivals. I don’t think that should necessarily be a deterrent. You’ll also notice my choices are from varied eras, allowing for the greatest number of guests possible. I’ve highlighted the guests I’d like to see in a few instances to make it easy for TCM to know who they should extend an invitation to. You’re welcome! Also, while I don’t mention the inclusion of writers they would no doubt enhance any presentation. Here we go…

My TCMFF 2018 Recommendations

Powerful Words: The Page Onscreen

Alan Crosland’s The Beloved Rogue (1927) starring John Barrymore and Conrad Veidt gets the most votes in my mind. This film, about French poet François Villon, had been thought lost for decades. According to legend, The Beloved Rogue is the John Barrymore movie the star watched with a large audience who didn’t know he was in attendance. The story goes that Barrymore was standing at the back of the movie palace and, dissatisfied with his own performance, said, “what a ham…”

It would be fun to have Drew Barrymore introduce this movie with Tom Meyers of the Fort Lee Film Commission. Tom and his team have several Barrymore-related projects in the works in Fort Lee. The Barrymores have strong ties to America’s first film town. I believe the TCMFF crowd would appreciate some early film history added to the introduction of the great Barrymore in a silent movie.

  Another movie I am really rooting for is William Dieterle‘s The Life of Emile Zola (1937). This movie has a memorable supporting cast, but it’s the film’s star, Paul Muni, who would make this special. He was my father’s favorite actor, which means a lot to me right now. Plus I’ve never seen him on a big screen. This biopic of the famous French novelist, which won Best Picture of the year, would be the perfect opportunity for me to do so.

  Rouben Mamoulian‘s 1931 screen adaptation of Robert Louis Stevenson‘s Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is another one I’d love to see. Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde stars Fredric March, who won the Oscar for his portrayal of the main character(s), and Miriam Hopkins who is always enjoyable to watch.

  Curtis Bernhardt‘s Devotion (1946) starring Ida Lupino and Olivia de Havilland as Emily and Charlotte Bronte should be a strong contender. The movie also stars Paul Henreid, which means Monika Henreid can be on hand to introduce the movie. Monika has just completed Paul Henreid: Beyond Victor Laszlo, a documentary focused on her father’s career.

  Based on John Steinbeck‘s Pulitzer Prize winning novel, John Ford‘s The Grapes of Wrath (1940) is as essential as it gets among book-to-film adaptations. It would be terrific to have both Jane Fonda and Peter Fonda on hand to introduce this movie, which features one of the greatest performances from their father’s legendary career.

  Based on a collection of stories titled The Jungle Book by Rudyard Kipling (1894), Disney’s 1967 animated classic of the same name directed by Wolfgang Reitherman should be considered a bare necessity. (Pa rum pum.) But seriously folks, wouldn’t it be fun to watch this animated classic together?

  Norman Taurog‘s The Adventures of Tom Sawyer (1938) would be an enjoyable screening. This movie features a stellar cast and we can have the added attraction of Cora Sue Collins in attendance to discuss the making of it. Cora Sue plays Amy Lawrence in the movie and she is sure to enchant the TCMFF crowd with her stories.

  The perfect vehicle to follow Tom Sawyer is Irving Rapper‘s The Adventures of Mark Twain (1944). This movie is not without its flaws, but it’s no throw away second feature either. After all Twain, born Samuel Langhorne Clemens, was one of – if not thee – greatest humorists the world has ever known. His story deserves the kind of actors cast in this picture including Fredric March, Alexis Smith, Donald Crisp and Alan Hale leading a terrific list of supporting players. To introduce this one we can have any number of Mark Twain Prize winners including Carol Burnett, Carl Reiner, Billy Crystal, Tina Fey, Bill Murray, Eddie Murphy, Whoopi Goldberg and on and on. Just sayin’.

  Sidney Franklin‘s The Barretts of Wimpole Street (1934) starring Norma Shearer and Fredric March focuses on the difficult early family life of poet Elizabeth Barrett Browning. This is another one I’d love to see with the TCMFF audience. The cast alone is worth standing on line for.

  The lovely Barbara Rush should introduce The Young Philadelphians (1959) in which she co-starred with Paul Newman. Directed by Vincent Sherman, the movie is based on a 1956 novel by Richard Powell. Plus, I happen to be very fond of it and its terrific cast, which includes Alexis Smith, Brian Keith, Robert Vaughn, Billie Burke and a few other classic greats of note. I’d have Illeana Douglas interview Barbara Rush, by the way.

  Rob Reiner’s Misery (1990) is memorable thanks in large part to Kathy Bates’ extraordinary performance as the fan from hell. The fact that the movie is sure to chill even the most ardent horror fan is a side benefit. With Reiner, Bates and James Caan, (who’s also great in the movie) in attendance the experience would be absolutely unforgettable. Jot that down!

  Based on the novel Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë (1847), William Wyler’s 1939 movie of the same title would be a treat on the big screen. I have to admit I’m not a huge fan of this movie because of what I think is a sell out ending. However, I also think it would be an immersive experience watching Wuthering Heights with a TCMFF audience.

  Lumet’s criminally underrated Fail-Safe (1964) starring Henry Fonda, Walter Matthau and another impressive list of players is one of the greatest thrillers of all time. Directed in the style of 12 Angry Men, Fail-Safe is based on the novel by Eugene Burdick. With an ending that leaves one speechless this is sure to be a hit with the TCMFF crowd. Again, the Fondas could introduce it along with Charles Matthau.

  Phil Karlson’s Scandal Sheet (1952) starring Broderick Crawford and Donna Reed is a fantastic film noir choice. I know Reed’s daughter, Mary Owen, does appearances for screenings of her mother’s films. It would be great to have her introduce this movie, which tells the story of a newspaper editor who commits a murder, alongside Eddie Muller.

  George Cukor’s version of Louisa May Alcott’s novel would be fantastic to see on the big screen. Little Women (1933) features an impressive cast any number of which can be well represented for an introduction. To name just two ideas – Tom Meyers would do a swell job of representing the Fort Lee-born Joan Bennett and Wyatt McCrea can discuss the movie and Frances Dee’s career.

  Fred Zinnemann’s Julia (1977) is based on the story by Lillian Hellman and both of the film’s two stars, Jane Fonda and Vanessa Redgrave, deliver affecting performances. It would be a huge attraction to have them both in attendance for a screening of this memorable film.

  Peter Brook’s 1963 adaptation of William Golding’s Lord of the Flies is a must. I had to read the book in high school and I will never forget the effect it had on me. The same goes for Brook’s naturalistic and truthful telling of the disturbing story. Any member of the cast and/or the director in attendance to discuss the making of the movie would be great.

  Charles Vidor’s Hans Christian Andersen (1952) starring Danny Kaye is my favorite of his movies. Beautiful to look at, wonderful to listen to and with all the charm of its star, Hans Christian Andersen reminds us fairy tales can come true. Who doesn’t want to share that with like-minded classic movie fans?

  An Odets/Lehman screenplay based on a Ernest Lehman novel – that’s what big money screenings are made of. Oh yeah plus Lancaster, Curtis and a memorable supporting cast. That’s what makes up Alexander Mackendrick‘s Sweet Smell of Success (1957) and its cynical world. I would love to see this introduced by Jamie Lee Curtis and Eddie Muller.

  Any number of movies based on the writing of W. Somerset Maugham would be treats at TCMFF. For personal reasons, however, I’m going with William Wyler’s The Letter (1940), which is based on a 1927 play by Maugham. Given this movie’s power of seduction (who can look away after that opening sequence) it deserves an introduction with serious clout. My plan would be to ask either Susan Sarandon, since she narrates the TCM original documentary, Stardust: The Bette Davis Story, or Meryl Streep who narrates the terrific Tribute to Bette Davis on the network. Both of them in attendance talking about Davis before we watch one of her greatest films would be a dream.

  I was going to end my recommendations list with Wilder’s Sunset Blvd. because what better example of writing for the screen is there? But then I couldn’t in good conscience include Wilder’s masterpiece and leave out the movie that beat it at the Oscars, Joseph L. Mankiewicz’s All About Eve (1950), which I also love. Of the two I had to admit Mankiewicz’s movie is the better choice due to the fact that the writer of the short story, The Wisdom of Eve, on which the movie is based does not get screen credit. TCMFF 2018 is the perfect occasion during which to honor the writer’s work officially this many years later. Of course either Sarandon or Streep would do quite nicely introducing this movie alongside Ben Mankiewicz.

Mary Orr’s The Wisdom of Eve was originally a 9-page short story that appeared in Cosmopolitan magazine in May 1946. Orr later expanded the story, in collaboration with Reginald Denham, into a successful play. 20th Century Fox later paid Mary Orr $5,000 for all rights to The Wisdom of Eve. What resulted is one of the all-time great motion pictures, which also deals with the importance of writing to a star’s career – stage or screen.

  Those are my 21 choices. I know acquiring all of the movies I mentioned is not possible and I know that some may not even be in good shape, but maybe I made note of a few that hadn’t occurred to anyone before. If not, then at least I enjoyed giving serious thought to how I would schedule the festival myself if I had great powers. Also, in case anyone’s interested, I have quite a few ideas for panels and Club TCM presentations. For instance, Illeana Douglas can moderate a group discussion about Pioneering  Women Screenwriters and Victoria Riskin can discuss her father Robert Riskin’s many contributions to films. Let me know if you want to hear more of those ideas and what your movie recommendations would be. Here endeth my post.

Hope to see you at TCMFF 2018!

  The Page Onscreen: Recommendations for #TCMFF 2018 Only a handful of movies have been announced for the 2018 Turner Classic Movies Film Festival (TCMFF)

[aion-rsa]

How Hideo Kojima and Junji Ito Could Finish What Silent Hills Started

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The collaboration survival horror fans have been waiting for may finally be happening, according to famed mangaka Junji Ito, who confirmed that he’s been talking to video game auteur Hideo Kojima about working together on a new horror project, which has been the subject of much speculation since the release of Death Stranding last year.

Ito shared this tidbit while talking to Viz Media during this weekend’s Comic-Con@Home event (via IGN), where he was asked whether he was currently working on any video game projects.

“So, the simple answer is no,” Ito’s translator Junko Goda told Viz Media. “However, I do know director Kojima and we have been in conversation that he might have a horror-based game that he may be doing, and so he has invited me to work on that, but there are no details on it yet.”

Those who have been following Kojima’s attempts to make a horror game over the years likely know that Ito was previously set to collaborate with the video game auteur and filmmaker Guillermo del Toro on Silent Hills, a new take on the beloved survival horror series starring The Walking Dead and Death Stranding actor Norman Reedus. But the collaboration never got past a few initial meetings and a karaoke session.

“Once the Silent Hills meeting was over, we went to karaoke,” Ito said while speaking at the Toronto Comics Art Festival (via Game Informer) in 2019. “I didn’t hear anything after that. I heard that the plan got scrapped through outside sources. I have seen Kojima and Del Toro since. I never started designing monsters. Nothing exists. There are no roughs or sketches.”

In an interview with IGN about approaching Ito to work on Silent Hills, del Toro called the mangaka “completely one of the masters,” saying that he loved how Ito seemed to “get high on his own supply” while imagining the grotesque monsters, body horror, and extreme violence that are trademarks of the mangaka’s work.

“In the way that you feel Dario Argento in the early movies was getting off on each murder or you feel David Cronenberg was secretly aroused by body horror – in the same way, you feel Junji Ito being titillated at a very basic disturbing level by his stuff,” del Toro said of Ito.

However Silent Hills would have turned out, it does sound like the trio had some interesting new ideas about how to push the survival horror genre forward.

“We had a few working sessions where we were talking about using the console, the next-generation console in a way that would surprise people. Let’s really freak out people. Let’s really cause a panic with Silent Hill. Let’s go for it. Let’s go for full-blown social madness,” del Toro told IGN. “We were planning this stuff. Ito was mainly being nice, making notes. He didn’t sing either. He was a very serious man.”

Unfortunately, when Kojima and publisher Konami had a falling out during the development of Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain, the game director left the company and Silent Hills was quickly canceled. Konami has done little with the series since (besides making Silent Hill-themed pachinko gambling machines).

It’s a shame this all happened before Ito could even put pencil to paper. I personally would have loved to see what monstrosities Ito’s chats with Kojima and del Toro might have inspired. Fortunately, Kojima and del Toro’s P.T. demo was a stunning proof of concept for what Silent Hills might have looked like. It was also its own experiment in “social madness.”

When P.T. was mysteriously released at Gamescom 2014 by a fake studio, many gamers quickly became obsessed with solving the confounding (and terrifying) demo’s seemingly nonsensical puzzles. Within hours, P.T. had become a viral marketing phenomenon, the subject of countless reaction videos, forum threads, walkthroughs, live streams, and social media posts. Of course, beating the demo revealed P.T.‘s biggest mystery of all: that it was, in fact, a “playable teaser” for Kojima and del Toro’s Silent Hills. Yet, by the time the truth had come out, P.T. itself had morphed into its own unique experience destined to outlive the game it was created to promote.

Much has been written about the making of P.T. and its influence on the horror genre in the years since its release. You can also find plenty of videos dissecting different aspects of the demo, including videos of players, dataminers, and modders trying to figure out how the demo works. Siux years later, certain things about the demo remain a secret, including the meaning of its cyclical narrative.

The demo is a notable example of a game going viral, as players worked together on the internet to solve the puzzles, while word of mouth on social media got others to try the demo. While Kojima explored this idea further in Death Stranding, which has its own social mechanics, del Toro and Kojima originally planned to take all of this one step further with Silent Hills, using “every aspect” of the PS4 to “create a state of widespread social panic,” according to IGN. While I’d stop short of saying it caused widespread panic, P.T. itself did spread like wildfire through internet gaming communities in 2014 like some sort of interactive urban myth or creepypasta. Or a meme.

Fans of the Metal Gear series know Kojima loves to insert metafiction and other metaphysical elements into his work, such as with the Psycho Mantis boss fight in Metal Gear Solid and the final twist in Metal Gear Solid 2, which some believe predicted the pervasive nature of meme culture on the internet as well as how technology could be used for social engineering. Many of Kojima’s games specifically tackle how technology can distort and corrupt reality.

P.T. has its own distortive qualities and can even be considered a major turning point in Kojima’s work undoubtedly influenced by del Toro’s own directorial sense. Some critics have said the demo’s endlessly looping hallway, which players must keep walking through to solve P.T.‘s many puzzles, “practically hypnotizes you into a state of vulnerability.” That sense of vulnerability also comes in part from the hostile ghost that follows closely behind you throughout the experience as well as the disorienting nature of the puzzles that work on a sort of dream logic that’s never explained within the actual game. (There are no tutorials or in-game prompts to be found in P.T.)

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Kojima told The Japan Times in 2014 that with P.T. he wanted to explore “a more genuine, thoughtful and permeating type of fear” than the violence and gore usually found in AAA survival horror games.

“There are horror action games with zombies and grotesque things and so forth. The real fear isn’t from those things. It’s from standing in an empty place, where just to step forward or to turn around is scary,” Kojima said, explaining that the demo is scary because “there’s no information.”

“Nowadays, when people don’t know something, they Google it. They ask on Twitter or Facebook and they get the answer right away. We live in an age of information. When that suddenly disappears, that’s the scariest thing,” Kojima explained. “That’s why there was no information about who made P.T. There was no purpose or background and no explanation about the story, and that’s frightening. I did this on purpose. That’s why I hid my name and title and just let them play.”

While Kojima has said many times since the release of P.T. that the demo wasn’t actually related to Silent Hills in terms of gameplay or story, it’s impossible not to wonder how the success of the interactive teaser would have influenced Kojima and del Toro’s final product, and how Ito’s own work would have added to the experience.

After all, Ito was a perfect fit for the “social madness” Kojima and del Toro were going for with Silent Hills. In his seminal horror manga books Gyo and Uzumaki in particular, Ito deals with extreme levels of social anxiety and the unbridled chaos that follows.

In Gyo, Japan is plagued by undead fish who crawl out of the sea using spider-like metal legs powered by a “death stench.” Images of bloated victims assimilated into the killer fish army pervade the pages of the book as do images of mass hysteria.

If Gyo is Ito’s own take on the zombie genre, Uzumaki is something far more experimental and disturbing. In Uzumaki, a small Japanese town finds itself under attack by a supernatural curse involving spirals. The book is infused with a heightened sense of paranoia, as characters try to navigate the horrific dream logic that’s not unlike the one found in P.T.

Interestingly enough, Ito was inspired to create Uzumaki in part due to his desire to understand spirals as symbols, as well as an interest in depicting spirals in an unexpected way that would scare Japanese audiences, an approach that sounds like Kojima’s own distortion of gameplay mechanics players normally take for granted.

“The ‘spiral pattern’ is not normally associated with horror fiction. Usually spiral patterns mark character’s cheeks in Japanese comedy cartoons, representing an effect of warmth. However, I thought it could be used in horror if I drew it a different way,” Ito said in an interview with 78 magazine in 2006. “Spirals are one of the popular Japanese patterns from long ago, but I don’t know what the symbol represents. I think spirals might be symbolic of infinity.”

While Ito’s work is full of the violence and gore that Kojima wanted to move away from with P.T., it’s clear that the two creators share similar sensibilities when it comes to finding more primal ways of scaring their audiences. Like Kojima and his use of the suburban hallway, Ito often uses images of things that aren’t traditionally considered scary — like spirals — in order to terrify. Another example is hair.

“Historically, long black hair has been symbolic of Japanese women, and most women value this image. The long hair of a woman is common in Japanese horror because it conveys an enveloping feeling of movement. I think it conjures up fear in people unconsciously,” Ito told 78. It’s in this space between what we know to be scary and what people don’t even know they’re scared of yet that both Ito and Kojima excel. With Kojima now running his own Kojima Productions indie studio where he can decide what he wants to work on and with whom he wants to work with next, his collaboration with Ito might finally come into fruition on their own terms. And their past work certainly points to a match made in hell. If Kojima and Ito do decide to collaborate on a new horror game, one would have to wonder how del Toro might fit into the project. After Silent Hills was canceled and a previous video game project called Insane also fell through, del Toro vowed to never work on a game again during an interview with Playboy (via IGN). That said, del Toro did allow Kojima to use his likeness for a major supporting character in Death Stranding, so perhaps there’s hope the Silent Hills trio could be reunited one day. Until then, our hopes of seeing something akin to what was planned for Silent Hills rest with Kojima and Ito. Perhaps Kojima could even teach Ito a thing or two about video games along the way: “I don’t know anything about games. I don’t play them. I am afraid if I get into them I’ll miss deadlines. I have never played Silent Hill,” Ito revealed at the Toronto Comics Art Festival while ruminating on his relationship with Kojima. “I have known Hideo Kojima for 20 years. He is a nice older brother type.”

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