#believe it or not it really sucks having every headline about my country being about how China is threatening us once again

[purecommemasolitude]

Something something people from countries that are at peace and prioritized globally do not know how lucky they have it

[semisgroupie]

A Change of Pace

Drummer!Tendou x Fem. Reader

Word Count: 2.8k

Warnings: dubcon, drug use/mentions, fingering (f!receiving), unprotected sex, public sex, creampie, finger sucking, spit

A/N: a huge thank you to @loveatsutani for allowing me to join! This is contribution to the Rolling Loud Collab you can check out the other pieces here. I really enjoyed writing this piece, it helped me write some of my other collab fics, I hope you enjoy! @hqintheclub

Loud music, the smell of sex and weed, people doing acid and lines of coke wherever possible. That was what music festivals were always like for you.

Your band was the headliner for today, the last day of the festival and you were honestly glad. You were tired of it all, movies made it seem like the best experience when honestly it was just tiring. You were tired of the haze of drugs, tired of the facade you had to put on for every single concert, tired of the music. Everything lost its shine, your world became black and grey. Music was once your passion, your life but it was all gone. Maybe something would be different for this festival.

You were gathering your picks and making sure your guitar was tuned while your other bandmates were practicing. Your manager came running to the bus you were all in.

“Hey Reggie, what’s going on? Where’s Jesse?”

“Jesse has a sprained wrist.” Your manager gave you all a weak smile after he was done.

Everyone on the bus groaned at the announcement. You all made a code phrase for your drummer since they had a habit of getting too drunk or too high or disappearing to fuck whatever walked. Normally there was your honorary backup drummer but she left to move to a different country.

“So what are we going to do? I can’t be lead guitarist and drummer.”

You reached in your guitar case to grab the mint box that had a couple of joints in it, hoping that maybe if you were just a little high then you wouldn’t have to think about what to do next.

“Don’t worry you guys, I have good news. Well, two pieces of good news. I fired Jesse since I am not paying them to fuck around during band time and I was able to find a backup drummer for this performance. He should be coming now actually…”

Just on cue a guy walked on the bus with bright red hair and a big smile on his face, he had some piercings and when he fully got on the bus you saw a multitude of tattoos that decorated his arms along with two drumsticks in his hand.

“Hi! I’m Satori! Sorry about your drummer but hopefully I’ll be able to do a good job. I learned the songs you guys are performing and I’m a pretty fast learner so don’t worry about me screwing up during the set.”

You all introduced yourselves and you put your mint box away. As you all got acquainted you noticed how Satori’s gaze would linger on you a bit longer and a light blush would coat his face. He was far from ugly by any means and he was the type of guy that you were attracted to but you didn’t have any plans to fuck anyone during this festival. After a few minutes of getting to know each other you guys were called to the main stage, when you all got on you heard chants of “where’s Jesse?” You sighed as you grabbed the microphone to tell all the fans the news.

“Hey guys, as you have already figured out Jesse isn’t here. They are currently dealing with an untimely sprained wrist, I do apologize for this news but we do have an honorary stand in. His name is Satori” Satori stands and waves to the crowd once you say his name and sits back down. “I hope you all still enjoy our set!”

You fixed your guitar strap and Satori counted the start of the song down and you all started playing. During the set you and Satori shared little winks and glances. It felt different playing this time, it was a bit more enjoyable like how it was when you first started playing with the band. The others in the band always made comments about Jesse being the anchor but now you were starting to believe them. After the set you threw your pick into the crowd and left to sit backstage. You sat on one of the speakers as you fished out one of the joints from the container.

“Hey you!” Your best friend and bassist of the band, Adriana, approached you with a smile on her face. “You looked like you actually enjoyed yourself out there this time! It was nice to see. It was also nice to see you and Satori practically ripping each other’s clothes off with your eyes. I’m not trying to insinuate anything but you should fuck him.”

Your eyes widened and you almost dropped the joint you placed between your lips.

“What are you talking about? I wasn’t eye fucking him or anything like that!”

“Yeah you were, well I’ll leave you be and I will take this” she leaned over pulling the joint from your lips and put it between hers lighting it up with a smile. “I think he’s coming over too so I will see you later and you can tell me all the dirty details.”

She left with a wink while you shook your head at her antics. She always made claims about you needing to get laid and would try to set you up with someone, which always failed but maybe this time you might go through with it. You reached in your mint box and grabbed another joint, slotting it between your lips and lighting it to finally take a drag as Satori came and sat next to you.

“Do you have another one of those by any chance? I smoked my last one yesterday and I don’t trust anyone enough to buy some out here. If not, it's okay!”

You took one last hit and handed it over to him.

“It’s fine, the people out here lace their joints with angel dust and anything else they could put their hands on. Plus you deserve a little something after the amazing job you did out there. You did better than Jesse ever could.”

He chuckled at your compliments and took a drag from the joint, letting out a low groan at the slight burn in his lungs.

“You’re too kind but thank you. I had a little inspiration to do even better than I originally planned.”

“Oh really? And what might that be?”

He took one last drag before turning back to you, blowing the smoke near your face with a smirk.

“You. Maybe if I did a good enough job I might get your attention.”

You turned away to try and hide the smile growing on your face before turning back to him and grabbing the joint.

It was passed between the both of you while the conversation continued. Which was filled with flirtatious and suggestive comments and just learning about each other. By the time it became a roach Satori had it between his index finger and thumb. You reached over to grab another from your mint box but he grabbed your hand.

“No, don't do that, come here.”

He gripped your chin and brought you close to his face. He turned his head to take the last hit and he tapped your cheek for you to open up and so you did. He slotted his lips against yours and exhaled the smoke into your awaiting mouth. Once he was sure you breathed it in he took your bottom lip between his teeth teasingly and pulled back to only let you exhale before leaning back in to kiss you.

Hints of mint mixed with an herbal taste filled your tastebuds. This taste only strengthened once he slipped his tongue into your mouth deepening the kiss. You pulled away from him slowly, a string of saliva connecting the both of you only to be swiped away by Satori’s tongue.

He brought his hand to your face and slid his thumb across your bottom lip sliding it in between your swollen lips and laying it on your tongue. He massaged your tongue with the digit groaning at the way you obediently sucked on it. He moved his other hand along your thigh moving it upwards to play with the hem of your skirt. Before he could move it any further you both were interrupted by a passerby.

“Hey you horny bastards go find a room or a tent to fuck in!”

Satori pulled his thumb out of your mouth and looked around, finding a secluded area even further backstage. He got up and grabbed your hand leading you to the area without a word, once you were both behind the boxes he pinned you against the makeshift wall.

“You said I deserve a ‘little something’ but have I done enough to have you instead?”

His dilated pupils and bloodshot eyes looked into your matching ones. In a weed induced and lust filled haze you nodded, eager to see how he would please you. He drew you in for another kiss, a messy one filled with need and desire. His hand traveled up your skirt to rub his fingers along the soft, now wet, cotton of your panties.

Feeling the wet spot grow under his touch he pulled away from you with a smirk.

“You’re this wet just from kissing? I can’t wait to see what happens when I put my fingers and cock inside you.”

Before you could retort, his slim fingers slid your panties to the side and played with your folds. He leaned back in occupying his mouth with any piece of skin he could lay his lips on. He slowly slid one finger inside you chuckling against your skin at the gasp you let out. He thrusted his finger inside you a few times before adding another.

The next act started playing, their music blocking out any of your moans. Satori bit down on your neck making you cry out. He kept scissoring his fingers in and out of you making you whine more and more. Once he put his thumb on your clit you cried out as you got closer to your orgasm. He knew as well, feeling how you grew even tighter around his fingers and your hand clenched around his wrist. As much as he wanted you to cum for him now that wouldn’t be enough, he wanted you to cum around his cock, he could give you as many orgasms as you want with his fingers another time. He slowed his pace and pulled his fingers out of you, he looked at them coated in your juices. He couldn’t help himself but put them in his mouth, savoring your essence with a groan. You looked at him with a pitiful look, you looked so hurt but so turned on at the sight of him sucking on his fingers. You wanted to taste his fingers, feel how they massage your tongue, you just wanted more of him.

“Oh don’t look so sad I’m not going to leave you high and dry--well, high and wet--I want you to cum on my cock. I want to hear what pretty sounds you make once I’m balls deep inside you.”

He unbuttoned his jeans and lowered them to his knees along with his underwear. You looked down and saw his hard cock, the tip red and leaking precum. You felt your mouth water at the sight and you met Satori’s eyes. He chuckled at your hungry gaze and shook his head.

“No, not right now. Right now I want to bury my cock inside you and fuck you brainless.”

He spit on his hand and pumped his cock a few times before reaching down to grab your leg and lift it. You reached down and moved your panties to the side making it easier for him to finally fuck you. He teased your entrance with the tip of his cock, smearing your slick along the tip before sliding inside of you. Once the tip was in he slammed the rest of his length in making you yelp and arch your back.

“Oh I know, I know, I normally wouldn’t rush but you don’t want to get caught do you?”

“No I don’t, just please move some more.”

He started moving his hips, lifting your leg even higher as his thrusts grew faster. His eyes never left your cunt. He didn’t know what he loved seeing more, the creamy ring around his cock or the way you would grip onto him when he would pull out only leaving his tip inside you before thrusting back in fully. The group was playing their last song so Satori needed to make both of you cum quick to prevent the both of you from getting caught.

He stilled his hips and puckered his lips as he spit on your cunt. You clenched around him tightly and he sped his hips up.

“Oh you like when I spit on your cunt? Where else do you want my spit huh?” Without a word you opened your mouth and stuck your tongue out, silently begging him to spit in your mouth.

“Dirty little slut wants me to spit in her mouth? What the slut wants” he pulled on your tongue bringing your face closer to his as he collected his saliva once more to spit in your mouth immediately stuffing two fingers in your mouth. Satori groaned at the way you moaned around them and the way you were clenching around his cock. He knew you were reaching your orgasm soon and so was he but before that happened he needed one more thing from you. He took his fingers from your mouth and leaned in close to your ear.

“Who’s dirty cockslut are you?”

You bit your lip and shook your head, more focused on your incoming orgasm. Satori took your face in his hand before speaking again.

“Who’s dirty cockslut are you? Say it or you don’t get to cum.”

“‘M your dirty cockslut.”

“Say it louder and say my name. Don’t stop until you're cumming around my cock.”

“‘M Satori’s dirty cockslut!”

He brought his spit slicked fingers down to your clit, rubbing it quickly as his hips pounded against yours, you kept repeating the words he told you like a mantra. You clenched tightly around him as your orgasm hit you hard, you were spasming around his cock and Satori came inside you shortly after. Once you both relaxed he slid out of you and moved your panties to cover you up.

“Don’t want to let any escape. I want you to remember me by this.”

He leaned in and kissed you once more before fixing his clothes and got ready to walk you back to the bus. Once you guys were about to head to the festival floor someone tapped your shoulder. You turned around and were met with one of the sound guys.

“Next time you two decide to fuck, can you not do it near a mic that’s on? I’m all for people getting laid but I don’t want to hear it.”

He left you and Satori staring at each other with the same wide eyed look. You were the first to burst out laughing and he followed soon after. You both made jokes about it as you walked back to the bus.

Once you reached the bus you turned to him with a small smile. Satori cupped your face and kissed you a couple of times before pulling away.

“Don’t be sad buttercup, I have a feeling we’ll see each other again soon. Plus you have a little memory of today’s events.”

With a wink he left you and you made your way in the bus to tell Adriana everything that happened. You did wonder if he meant what he said or if he just said that to every girl he fucked at a festival.

A few months later your band had their next big gig, for smaller venues you guys had different backup drummers but none could compare to how good Satori was. You were all warming up while another band was opening up for you. Reggie came running over to you guys.

“Hey, I have really good news for you all! We signed contracts and I finally got you a permanent drummer. You all are familiar with him, some more than others” Reggie winked at you before continuing.

“Welcome your new drummer Satori!”

Satori walked out and beelined straight towards you. He wrapped his arms around you and picked you up, spinning you around.

“Hiya buttercup, missed me? I know I missed you.”

“Of course I missed you Satori, I thought I wouldn’t see you again.”

He put you down and kissed you.

“I told you I had a feeling I’d see you again and I would’ve done anything to make that happen. So how about after this gig I take you out for some food and then I take you back to the hotel room and show you how much I missed you?”

[sweet-sirin]

Emotionally, I'm pretty wrecked. I'm not a huge optimist by nature but I always had a firm belief everything will somehow be fine in the end, and that's why I was absolutely sure a war with Ukraine is impossible.

My worldview shattered thoroughly, my heart broke. My family's friends are russian soldiers, my relatives are ukranian soldiers. I want both of them to come back home alive. But it's hard to say out loud "I want russian soldiers back home safely" because they aren't people anymore, they're the agressors and so they deserve to die. I'm fucking sick of hearing this. I'm sick of the double standard. I'm sick of people who have no idea for how long this situation had been brewing for jump in to show off their moral high ground by wishing people death and pain.

For russians I'm a western brainwashed traitor, and for the west I'm a russian apologist. I'm sorry I don't fucking buy in every news headline I see, no matter who's side it flatters more.

Whatever was left from nation brotherhood between Ukraine and Russia is dead. That's not what I want to believe but that's gonna be the reality. I feel isolated and cut from my own culture and history, one more severed connection. And now we're getting isolated from the west too. It feels like walls are closing in and a new iron curtain is falling. Possibilities are dwindling. Getting out of the country for good was hard before, but now I'm not sure it's even all that possible. Not for me, for sure. I can't legally leave.

I'm stuck.

I fucking hate Putin. And I really don't care to hear how horrible he is from people, that did not learn to fear for their safety directly because of his reign. I had to suffer this motherfucker all my life, I have to be wary of police coming for me for some random shit I might have said online 8 years ago, just to now hear half the globe chant that I should suffer more. I will. Because the sanctions that were "meant to hurt the oligarchy", that was already sucking our blood dry, hurting the poorest. We're fucked. Everything is already at least twice as expensive. My kind of ruined health is gonna cost me beyond a fortune now, but I'm lucky because at least my dad didn't lose his job like thousands of others.

Fuck every fucking company that's leaving Russia. Fuck even harder those companies that say they do but stay and operate just like before. I'm sick of PR stunts. I'm sure our oligarchs with yachts worth more than my entire district are super sad they can't buy a Sims 4 or an Ikea chair. I don't have any illusions about the economy and inner production. The future looks grim for many years ahead, all because Putin decided he's a military genius that can take on NATO. This bastard is 69 years old, bitch is gonna sneeze and die like a hamster, and leave us to drown in a mess that might turn out worse than what 90s were.

And I'm sick of guilt for being worried over my own future and safety in a ruinous dictatorship when people are literally murdered and ripped from their homes. I'm furious that showing even littlest of support for them can get me a jail time. Human decency is fucking illegal now. Why is it fucking illegal to say I do not want this war. I just want it over with. I don't care what happens to Russia, we're fucked no matter what. Nothing is worth this.

I don't have the energy to talk to anyone, I see nightmares constantly, I feel depressed again despite overcoming my SAD this year and I'm rapidly losing weight that I just managed to finally gain. I'm tired.

[enderspawn]

♫ techno?

YES

Anti-Hero – Sekai No Owari

Glory and Gore – Lorde

more details down below the read more

okay listen I know a lot of techno cosplayers use the chorus of anti-hero but IT’S THE VERSES THAT MAKE IT A TECHNO SONG!!! So im gonna focus mainly on that

“You know I don't give a damn about what's "right" Or pleasing everyone around me Cause I know this world that brought us life Wasn't made to keep everyone happy”

Techno doesn’t care about what other ppl see as right, he cares about what he does as right. He KNOWS he’s not a hero, he’s fine being the villain bc in his eyes he’s doing the right thing in the end. Not everyone’s gonna be happy w what he does but fuck them, bc theres no ending where EVERYONE is happy.

“The rules and laws that countries come up with In front of me, they're all shit Cause there are people that I've gotta protect And if you get in my way, you're dead”

Okay ppl literally made up rules, laws, AND a country all in front of him and he think’s its shit like. Yep that’s the line! Also…. He would absolutely kill anyone and everyone for those he cares abt and protects. “for you the world, phil” and all that. Part of why I think he went thru w obliterating l’manberg was, as well as being a government and unfairly trying to execute him, they punished phil for his involvement w techno. Fuck that.

“You see I'm tired of trying to justify Every decision that I make If it's to save the people that I stand by You better believe what I say”

He genuinely believes government corrupts. By destroying it, he thinks that he is helping in the end but its hard to JUSTIFY, esp to the ppl he’s killing. He’s doing what he thinks he has to in order to save those he loves (which isn’t limited to phil tbh. Even when allied w tommy he wanted to destroy lmanberg to save HIM too.)

“ "Stay in the lines, don't make a scene" Heroes try to tell us what's right But when push comes to shove, you'll know what I mean I'm ready to start a fight”

He WILL break the law and you CAN NOT stop him fjdklsjfkl

“I'm gonna be the anti-hero Feared and hated by everybody I'm gonna be the anti-hero So I can save you when the time comes”

Again I said it before but it fits, he doesn’t think himself a hero sure but HE DOES WHAT HE DOES BC HE THINKS ITS RIGHT. HE ISNT AN ANARCHIST BC OF SPITE (even if his destruction might be lol) HE IS BC HE BELIEVES IT’S THE BEST POSSIBILITY.

“Righteousness is a thing that I hate Cause it doesn't do any good for anyone And everyone thinks everything is OK If they just obey”

In short: ur not any better for following the government’s laws bc it wont magically fix things! You’re not better for obeying! Anarchy baby!!

“I don't want to think about what they see When they look up and see evil me You see, love isn't what I need As long as I can set you free”

Okay not to be in mourning of the tommy techno dynamic but. He doesn’t care if everyone he loves hates him as long as they’re safe and free from tyranny. He doesn’t CARE (at least he says) if tommy hates him if its for his own good. Techno is very much a ends justify the means kind of guy, why not apply it to his own relationships w others.

WOO NEXT SONG

Glory and Gore could fit w a lot of characters (particularly I see it as a dream and techno song) bc its about fighting finding fame from it

“But in all chaos, there is calculation”

My man thrives in chaos and rebellion, but he puts weeks of effort into it!! He carefully calculates his battles in order to cause his chaos!!

“You've been drinking like the world was gonna end (It didn't) Took a shiner from the fist of your best friend (Go figure)”

Okay so this isn’t rlly abt him, and more general pogtopia (Wilbur w the first line, the world ending being destroying lmanberg) but the second line is abt tommy and techno’s fight in the pit prove me wrong JFKDLJF

“Glory and gore go hand in hand That's why we're making headlines You could try and take us But victory's contagious”

Techno was brought into the pogtopia conflict BECAUSE he’s famous for being a great warrior. He literally makes headlines with his gore. Also, has he ever LOST a single battle/war he’s been in? even when taken prisoner and EXECUTED he managed to escape victorious and alive. His victory IS damn contagious, technoblade never dies baby, we win theseeee

“Delicate in every way but one (The swordplay) God knows we like archaic kinds of fun (The old ways) Chance is the only game I play with, baby We let our battles choose us”

Techno is brutal in his combat and swordplay and, if we consider stuff like mcm and mcc canon, often does so for fun. Despite that tho he still doesn’t really START wars. He was recruited into pogtopia. He went into retirement after new lmanberg was made and only came out after HE was attacked. His battles CHOOSE HIM.

“Tired little laughs, gold-lie promises We'll always win at this, I don't ever think about death It's all right if you do, it's fine”

Hrhrhrnngng tommy techno time. They both made promises to each other to help the other and both ended up going back on their word. Also, you can interpret “I don’t ever think about death, it’s alright if you do” to be about how tommy’s at one life while techno’s at 3, OR abt tommy’s suicidal ideation during exile and aaaaaaAHHHHH

“We gladiate, but I guess we're really fighting ourselves Roughin' up our minds so we're ready when the killtime comes Wide awake in bed, words in my brain "Secretly you love this, do you even wanna go free?" Let me in the ring, I'll show you what that big word means”

HHHOUGH BABY THIS IS THE MONEY LINE!! Techno ENJOYS fighting in the end, and with the voices of chat they demand blood from him. He says he wants to change, to retire and be peaceful, but in the end “secrety you love this, do you even wanna go free?”!!!! hes in conflict with HIMSELF over his war activities and fighting urges. War sucks in the end and you lose people, but its what he’s built his identity over. He IS the blood god, the blade. What is he ALLOWED to be beyond violence? IDK IM JUST HAVING TECHNO THOUGHTS NOW BUT LIKE!!! YO!!! Even you could read into it that when he thinks that his first impact is to “let him in the ring”, violence is the only universal language for him to the point he doesn’t KNOW anything else.

ANYWAY THANKS FOR COMING TO MY TEDTALK I LOVE TECHNOBLADE jfdksjfl

[jasonnylaura]

How can I get my money back from a binary options scam?

A binary option is similar to a normal (“vanilla”) option, where you pay a premium for the option to buy or sell an instrument at a fixed price (the exercise price – see box below for a detailed explanation). Profits or losses on vanilla options can be small or large, depending on the difference between the “exercise” price and the price of the underlying asset.

Unlike normal options, however, binary options do not fluctuate in value. Either the option is “in the money” on expiry – in which case it pays out – or it isn’t, in which case it expires worthless. Because of this binary nature, many shysters see an opportunity in selling binary options that are highly unlikely to end up in the money. They get to collect the hefty premiums, but never have to pay out.

Don’t be suckered by wild success stories

The media is part of the problem. Journalists, particularly those working at online content mills, are so desperate for content that might “go viral” and garner lots of hits that they’re quite willing to run a story with a click-bait headline without doing much (if any) background research. Take the recent tale of a 16-year-old “self-taught currency trader”, who apparently turned £150 into £60,000 in less than a year. This dubious success story was widely shared on social media without many questions being asked. Yet if we take those returns and calculate them on an annual basis, this 16-year-old’s return for the year would be 39,900%. That would literally make him the best trader of all time. So how did a 16-year-old school kid learn how to outsmart the best minds and machines on the planet, just by watching YouTube videos? As nobody asked him, sadly we’ll never know.

There was also the very recent example of Giovani , a 20-year-old medical student in Plymouth who claimed to be making six figures a month from foreign exchange trading. One major newspaper reported this month that more than 1,000 investors were sucked in by Singh’s Instagram account, which showed him posing in designer clothes with expensive cars at plush holiday resorts. Those who signed up for his services found that their trading accounts were emptied on Christmas Eve and the FCA has added him to its warning list of unauthorised traders (after the fact, unfortunately). But what the paper doesn’t mention in this particular piece is that Singh’s “success” was first reported on its own website in breathless, no-questions-asked fashion, in November, just a month before it all went horribly wrong.

This aggravates me because, as a genuine trader, I work hard to make profits and I know what it takes. I also don’t like to see people being conned. So I want to unpack this story for you, so that you don’t end up falling for one of these scams or something similar.

How does the binary-options scam work?

There is a reason why so many gentlemen (it’s usually men) in their early 20s now apparently own private jets, luxury cars and slick watches. It just may not be because they’ve cracked the financial markets as they claim. As Charlie Munger, Warren Buffett’s business partner, puts it: “Show me the incentive and I will show you the outcome”. There are many reputable financial-trading firms and brokerages out there. However, many – ones that I would describe as “bucket shops” – are not so reputable. Spread-betting firms typically make their money on the spread (the gap between the buying price and the selling price) and the commission paid by their clients. So their business model does not benefit from losing traders.

However, many brokers know that a losing trader can be very profitable – for them. If you know that 90% of traders will lose all of their money within six months, what do you do? Simply take the other side of the trade. When Johnny Punter buys, the broker sells. And when Johnny Punter wishes to cover his losses, the broker buys and collects the profit.

Unprofitable traders are so profitable for many a bucket shop that they will pay handsome introduction fees for new traders. Therein lies the incentive. It doesn’t matter if you’re actually making any money from your trading – if you can get even a £20 incentive for every trader who signs up with the minimum deposit of a few hundred pounds, then you only need to sign up 1,000 people a month to make £20,000. And the reality is that these brokers aren’t offering just £20 for new clients – they’re offering hundreds. I know they do, because I’ve been offered it.

The Pied Pipers of foreign exchange

If you’re not a successful trader, the next best thing is to fake it. A quick Google search reveals that you can rent a Lamborghini Huracan for four days at a price of £2,500. This is fairly steep – but you can rent a Lamborghini Gallardo for two days for £1,590. Two days is more than enough for a wannabe forex guru to take hundreds of snaps in different outfits, parking in fancy residential estates that they don’t live in and overall giving the impression over several months that they really do own a six-figure supercar. And of course, there are plenty of places to hunt down a cheap, out-of-season stay at a luxurious five-star hotel, where they can do exactly the same. Then they just pop it all on social media and wait for eager punters to line up to sign up with their “exclusive broker”.

Many brokers offer demo accounts, in which case the “guru” can just repeatedly put on ten trades in a row, come out with winners, then screenshot it and post it on Instagram. If even that is too difficult a task, then it’s a simple matter to fake the picture instead using image manipulation software and post that. With “evidence” of their success sorted out, the trader then promotes their wares with promises of “signals” that have 90% success rates, alongside key phrases such as “no risk” and “guaranteed profit”. Most informed investors realize that if a magic money-making machine did exist it would be owned by a private hedge fund, never to see the light of day. So anyone who actually believes that a 20-year-old student could pull this off is ideal bait – inexperienced, naive and potentially desperate.

The scam also succeeds because of how victims feel when they finally realize they’ve been suckered. Most don’t tell anyone because they feel foolish and want to save face. But also, they know (or rapidly learn) that there is very little the police can do. The banning of the sale of binary options was a step in the right direction. But now the traders of Instagram simply give away their “signals” to trade these options for free. And many bucket-shop brokers are overseas – often they’re not even doing anything illegal in the country in which they operate (although equally often the traders in question will imply that the bucket shop is a reputable UK-based and regulated institution, or lie flat out).

There are even operators who will manipulate the punter’s account in order to make them believe they are winning and then call on them to deposit more money. Then, when the client finally wishes to withdraw, the company goes cold and refers them to the small print, in which it says that the client must trade through an impossible amount of money just to be allowed to withdraw. Other brokers allow the affiliate to widen the spread to maximize their own commission and increase losses for their clients. We look at ways to avoid being scammed in the box below, but in short, as always – if it looks too good to be true, it is.

Can I trust Binary option scam reviews?

Is there a scam behind "Forex Binary Options" trading?

How do I go about recovering money from a Forex scam?

What is the best way to get my money back from an internet scam?

How can I recover my funds on binary options?

How can I get back my lost money from a scammer?

Alienmanhackers.xyz assists individuals and corporates around the world. They are able to use tools which are available in both UK and foreign jurisdictions to secure the best outcome for clients. With the help of a friend was able to recover the sum of 42,000GBP which was stolen under the pretense of investment.

[anika-ann]

Heart Too Cold, but Friends of Gold - Pt.10

Alone Is What I Have

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader     Word count: 2200

Summary: Avenger!reader AU. Part 2 of Melting Hearts series. Part 1 HERE.

Snowflake is hiding. And she’s good at it. Also, reportes suck (at least in this story and chapter)

Warnings: swearing, light angst,… eh

Story Masterlist

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Alone is what I have, alone protects me. (BBC’s Sherlock Holmes) …And what more, alone protects the people I care about the most.

Prague was an interesting city. You supposed it was not too much different from other European cities, the old buildings and a breath of history on every other corner meeting the modern steel and technology of today, but there was just some kind of an aura that got to you. The system of public transportation had been a bit confusing at first, but allowed countless different ways of getting where you needed, which also meant many different escape routes – you still were a pragmatic. And you liked it here.

What you not necessarily liked, but definitely appreciated for its convenience, was the anonymity and the nature of Czech people – it took them a lot of time to warm up to someone, no matter how warm-hearted they could become once they let someone in.

In the streets of Prague, you could easily recognize Praguer from a foreigner; unlike the foreigners, the habitants of Czech capital had developed an amazing ability of looking around and not seeing. They would meet the same person for the fourth time in the past hours and they simply wouldn’t notice. They were having their eyes for nothing; it always reminded you of Matt Murdock, the blind lawyer of Hell’s Kitchen who was the exact opposite.

Matt, despite not being able to use his eyes anymore, saw more than anyone. You had thought of contacting him many times, just to have some familiarity in your new world where friendship or any kind of a relationship was a luxury you couldn’t afford, but you always backed out. You were too scared of him getting in touch with the Avengers’ team. Not to mention his lawyer persona seemed busy enough even without your load of crap – you had looked him up few times, rather rarely and always within walking distance from the faculty of law of Charles University of Prague, so you wouldn’t raise suspicion about yourself. After all, a random person connected to public wi-fi taking interest in a very specific lawyer of Hell’s Kitchen could be much of a hint; if the random person was a law student though… you thought it was relatively safe.

So you only had acquaintances, people you met from time to time, but never for their friendship – they were more of business partners, really. You headed to a meeting to a café which one of ‘your’ people, Eva, frequented rather often and liked to hang out in.

You found a boot in the back. You pulled out your laptop and started it, automatically checking on your surrounding once more; it was a terrible and necessary habit of a person who was on the run. Since you were almost 15 minutes early, you decided to catch up with the world (read the Avengers) on free wi-fi.

The apartment you lived in had no internet connection and once again, you needed the anonymity; if people connecting in a café checked the news site and paid a lot of attention to news of New York City and the Avengers, no one could question it – and it wouldn’t pop out at Tony’s radar, because no one could tell the search was coming from one particular person repeatedly.  

When you opened the news site, your heart stopped. Your breath froze on your lips, your throat getting impossibly tight, your vision immediately blurring. You squinted at the screen so you could re-read the headline.  

‘Did our Captain die for nothing?’

You could feel the optical mouse crying under your palm as the frost covered it, but you couldn’t make yourself to care.

Your eyes were roaming around the article, desperately finding a prove of you being wrong.

Luckily, you were.

Seventy years ago, Steven Grant Rogers, a man we know as Captain America, laid down his life to save countless others. The serum-powered soldier’s mission was to take down HYDRA, Nazi’s science division, and all history books claim that he and his Howling Commandos achieved that. Yet, the events of past days are telling us a different story. Captain America and other S.H.I.E.L.D. operatives were fighting the very same organization everyone believed to be defeated. While in reality, HYDRA had been growing in their own rows.

The reporter went on, uncovering an enormous intel leak from S.H.I.E.L.D. following the discovery of HYDRA moles inside of the government agency, but there was no other word on Steve. You choose to believe he was alive – because they would sure as hell ‘mention’ if he wasn’t –, finally allowing yourself to breathe in.

You decided you hated reporters and their shocking headlines that were supposed to bait more readers. You almost had a fucking heart-attack.

Now, you had to believe Steve was alright. In addition, you learned he had found a new ally known as Falcon – a man with advanced technology in a form of fucking wings. Also, Natasha had been by his side.

Reading into details of the article – and multiple others – you were stressing over your parents again. Fury had told you there was no record of their current position in S.H.I.E.L.D. files, something he had taken care of when finding out there had been the leak about your identity in the first place. In theory, they should be safe – but all you had was hope.

There was a tiny voice in the back of your head, luring you back to US, back to the Avengers, back to Steve. Once again, the theory was he should be safer now – you believed now that Michaels was part of HYDRA, the organization he had been talking about to scare you off being nothing else but the group finding its origins in the thirties – yet, you were too scared to take that risk. If HYDRA had handled to infiltrate S.H.I.E.L.D. and figure out your identity, where was the insurance of some other terrorist group not being able to do the same? As convenient as it would be, Michaels hadn’t had to be part of HYDRA at all.

You couldn’t go back.

Not to mention you didn’t believe your family of choice would want you back and you didn’t think you could handle the rejection. Your heart ached at the image of Steve’s cold eyes, pushing you away. You dreamed of it sometimes, of you returning and him greeting you flatly, advising you to come back where you had come from; sometimes, he welcomed you with the warmest smile and ‘I missed you so much’ on his lips before letting them get familiar with yours again.

But in the cold reality, you knew your return was way too risky – for Steve and for your heart as well.

You focused on the lines in front of you, letting each of them get carved into your brain. You learned about Steve being in a hospital, fortunately with his life no longer hanging on a thread. You learned that S.H.I.E.LD. stopped existing, leaving a whole lot of uncovered secrets behind, including the last possible trace of you in Provence – you had left the area months ago after you couldn’t resist and had saved a little girl from getting hit by a car, sadly in a way that draw too many prying eyes. You had had to change the settings of your mask and run after that stunt.

That was how you had found yourself in Prague, building a completely new life once again. You were an English teacher now, a private one, individuals or little groups seeking you out for improving their conversation skills. It was ridiculous how much money people were willing to pay for it – luckily for you. It meant a very flexible schedule and not necessarily meeting the same people regularly, which was relatively safe.

“Brigit!” a voice called out and you jumped in your seat, realizing the woman was addressing you. Damn the fake names!

You looked up with a hasty smile, meeting Eva’s amused expression.

“Spaced a little, aren’t you?”

“Spaced out,” you corrected her automatically and she gave you a look that told you she was hundred percent done with you. You grinned in return. “Sorry. Just… interesting article. Let’s order some caffeine before we start?”

“Yes, please. I was working on my thesis for like… well, very long. I barely slept. I need caffeine.”

Your smile turned sympathetic. Late nights you knew too well despite never being a college student. Eva was majoring in biology on top of that, trying to improve her English so she could apply for her dream job, so you couldn’t even imagine the pain.

“You know what? I’m paying today.”

The woman honestly looked as if she wanted to kiss you on spot. Which was kinda ironic, considering how much money she paid you and how little the coffee cost in comparison, but you weren’t about to mention that.

“I’m choosing the most expensive one.”

“I’m sure you are.”

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Life went on. Days seemed too long, so you had been adding new students to your flock to keep yourself busy with no time for gloomy thoughts. But the truth was, you were just terribly lonely.

You missed your parents.

You missed your team.

You missed Steve.

And as crazy as it sounded, you missed the insane world of avenging, because the people whose absence was killing you had been a part of that world. Not even starting on the rewarding feeling that would come when managing to save a life.

It was one of those days when you were drowning in loneliness when you learned about yet another adventure the team had been through – maybe it was why the news of Sokovia hit you so hard.

An artificial intelligence trying to take on the world with an army of super-bots under his command and starting with… sending a part of the country literally flying in the air. It ended with that, only thanks to the Avengers and the word was that three more enhanced individuals were seen on the scene, one of them laying down his life.

Three more enhanced. Had the world gone completely crazy? And the one who had died….

The urge to come back, maybe be forgiven, maybe even not being afraid for Steve’s life with what could be new faces on the team… it was stronger than ever. Your heart ached, the homesickness squeezing your lungs and not allowing you to breathe in properly.

You left yet another café in hurry, shooting Petr, the student you were supposed to meet, a quick apology that you were feeling very sick. You apologized for the extremely short notice. He was almost too understanding, but you were grateful that you could just curl up in a ball on your bed and cry for an hour. It cost you all of your strength not to give in to the calling of your powers and start a snowstorm. It would make you weak and you would be found. You kinda wanted to be weak and found, hopefully by your friends.

You didn’t take the risk.

The next day, you woke up with new determination to pick up as many new students as you could to wear yourself down to a bone. For the two following weeks, you were desperate to search for some new faces.

With Murphy’s luck, it seemed like too many of yours no longer needed your services and no newbies popped up. It was one of the reasons why you jumped after the opportunity; when Eva mentioned she had this Russian friend who had moved to Prague very recently and seemed so excited about the lessons Eva was still attending, you immediately said yes to a meeting set in an only three days’ notice.

You should have known better.

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The woman – Inna, as you learned from Eva’s narration – came to the café with her friend; you had said it would be easier for her to be accompanied instead of Eva taking a picture of you and letting her find you on her own. The true reason behind your actions had been simple – you didn’t want anyone to have your picture, even when wearing the S.H.I.E.L.D. mask.

So Eva entered the Starbucks of your choice with a pretty blonde by her side and gave you a cheerful wave as she spotted you by the stairs; you waited for the blonde to order, while Eva disappeared again to run some errands since she was in the centre of the town.

You guided Inna to a table in a less busy corner of the otherwise crowded room upstairs and you both set your drinks down before shaking hands.

“I’m Brigit. It’s very nice to meet you!” you tried out, previously learning from Eva that Inna’s level of English was pretty good.

The woman, who had seemed rather nervous before, relaxed as she accepted your hand, her shoulders losing the tension in them.

“The pleasure is all mine. I heard a lot about you.”

You were almost taken aback by her voice, heavy with eastern accent; despite the fact you knew where she came from, you expected the accent being less thick. But maybe you were just oversensitive.

“Really? Good things I hope?”

The blonde laughed shortly, her face getting younger. It was easier to see how she and Eva could be friends now. “Oh yes, Eva wouldn’t shut up about you! Shall we start?”

“Sure,” you agreed, gesturing towards the chair. “Why don’t you tell me a little about yourself and then what would you like our sessions to look like?”

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Part 11

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Tags: @mermaidxatxheart​, @murdermornings​, @elisaa-shelby​ @ask-hellbent-tweek​ @cxptain​, @kallafrench​, @smilexcaptainx​ @scentedsongrebel​, @orions-nebula​

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*Very discreetly shoves Czechia into another fic and smiles innocently* I need to use my knowledge, okay? :D

Also, BBC’s Sherlock is full of amazing quotes and I feel like re-watching it when I have the time.

And I’m aware this was a bit of a filler chapter. I’m preparing the ground for the next one, which hopefully will be more eventful ;) (I wonder who that new student might be :D )

[abassi-okoro]

ACCOUNTABILITY IS NOT JUSTICE! We Have Confused The Two

- Abassi Okoro

As much as it may please us to celebrate the guilty verdict of Derik Chauvin, a 15 year old black girl called the police today because she was being assaulted by a group girls. The police showed up and immediately shot her four times and killed her.

TODAY!

Rev. Kaloma Smith who is the pastor of University AME Zion Church in Palo Alto, CA said in response to the Derik Chauvin guilty verdict, "Tonight we celebrate justice." Please forgive me if I do not join any of you in celebratory practices and excitement. I'm not feeling very, "Excited" or "Relieved" these days. A black man in Alameda died yesterday while in police custody. It barely made headlines because we were distracted with Derik Chauvin. Police officers killed Duante Wright last week. Duante Wright's murder did not garner the same outrage because it happened in the shadows of the Chauvin trail. An unarmed black father suffering from a mental health crises was shot in the chest and killed by police back in January. It's just now coming to light.

Today however, it was a 15 year old black girl brutally shot and killed by another trigger happy white cop. MY daughter is 15 years old! It's hard enough to lose a child to a terminal illness or an automobile accident but to be MURDERED, shot four times in the torso by someone who she thought she could trust to at least help the situation is a horrible reality for black people in America. And while I understand that despite how much they might say they support us or how much of an ally they say they are, a white parent has absolutely no idea what it might even feel like for their child to be shot and killed by a police officer. That thought doesn't even register, not even in their wildest dreams. That thought is something that white parents will never have to entertain because in this reality, the reality that we all share, police officers simply do not jump out of their vehicles in white neighborhoods and gun down 15 year old white children.

I hate being the bearer of bad news and giving heart-breaking perspectives, I really do but Derik Chauvin being found guilty is NOT a victory. Not when he's only the 7th cop to be found guilty of murder out of the 15,000 Americans killed by police in the last six years. This is still victory for white America and white America has already recovered. The Chauvin guilty verdict had barely touched the hands of the judge before the police killed another one of our children. Obviously the verdict changed nothing before, during nor after it was read. Do you know how much audacity a police officer must have to shoot and kill an innocent, unarmed, 15 year black girl on the day of the most anticipated police shooting verdict in American history? Think about that! And here we are, most of us are gleaming with joy, smiling, honking our horns, talking about, "It's a victory!" That's funny because it doesn't feel like my favorite team won the Super Bowl or that I hit the lottery. I don't feel any safer at this moment than I did yesterday. No one should be feeling victorious. You think George Floyd's 6-year old daughter Gigi is feeling "Victorious?" Or do you think she rather have her dad?

So PLEASE, let's stop with the ”Racism is Over, We Won, We Did It” crap while patting ourselves on the back and congratulating one another. George Floyd is not the symbol of black change for this country. Accountability is not the same as justice and we have now confused the two.

The verdict was nothing more than symbolism and we fall for this this each and every time. This glimmer of hope, the tiny sweet taste of justice barely touching our lips and we try to hold on to that little morsel of flavor while convincing ourselves that it's a somehow a victory. It changes nothing and I know that's not what most of you want to hear but we're grown ass adults here and it's time we stop sugar coating reality and accept the bitter truth. THIS WILL NOT END! Not if we're expecting it to end one guilty verdict at a time. If Chauvin's guilty verdict is a small victory and it took THIS long and THIS many years and THIS many people and THIS many video recordings to gain this "little” sense of victory, then at this rate, more black men - black women and black children will die quicker than the rate at which cops are prosecuted. If one cop is prosecuted for every 300 black people killed then we will all be dead by the time real justice is served.

That's what you're calling a victory? There is absolutely no reason to believe that this verdict represents progress and I'm smart enough and old enough to not let white media and elected officials like Nancy Pelosi and Joe Biden talk that slick talk and gas me up - having me believe that I should celebrate my unnecessary slow crawl to a symbolic finish line.

Derik Chavin's verdict doesn't represent the whole of American Law Enforcement and we should be careful not to make Chauvin the face of police reform. I'm not trying to shame anyone who might have posted celebratory comments on social media. I understand the need to feel vindicated, the need to have some sense of justice. I am however saying for us to stop, take a deep breath and think critically. Not to let our emotions override logic and I know that's asking a lot because the George Floyd murder was so emotional for us all. To watch a man's life get sucked out of his body while his killer casually stared into the camera with his hands in his pockets was simply evil. We have to turn the emotions off for a minute and deal with the police in a way that's going to protect our people, our sons and our daughters, our wives, our husbands, our mothers, our fathers, our aunts, uncles and cousins.

Do not preach progress or victory to me if you're not willing to preach independence and sovereignty. Don't talk to me about a "Step in the right direction" and yet you're not willing to invest in black people and black communities (I'm talking to you white folks as well). The bottom line is that this 15 year old black girl killed today is the 218th person shot and killed by the police this year - barely four months into the year. And it will only escalate by the summer. There's no time to celebrate and no reason to celebrate. It's time to build strategies, procedures, protocols and defenses. Because according to this murder algorithm (law of averages), two more unarmed black people are scheduled to be shot and killed by the police by the end of this week.

[sourwolfstories]

Hi hi, may I humbly ask for your fav Stiles' POV fics?

Here you go! These are some of my favorite pov stiles fics, in no particular order. Hope you enjoy!

The Company I Keep by secondstar

Stiles has a favorite table at the library. Then some asshole comes along and steals it from him.

Every Step You Take by Nokomis

Stiles accidentally ends up magically bound to Derek. It’s super.

Occam’s Razor by MissAnnThropic

When Stiles goes to sleep, he’s a junior in high school. He wakes up in a world where he’s twenty-four and married to Derek Hale. Stiles just can’t seem to catch a break.

The Right Number by kyaticlikestea

When Stiles Stilinski's phone gets switched at the gym, he really just wants it back. The last thing he's expecting is to fall hopelessly in lust with the guy who's got his phone.

So, of course, that's exactly what happens.

No Homo by orphan_account

Stiles' sophomore year starts something like this:3 FourLokos+ 1 peer-pressuring cat- 1 best bro to end all best bros= 1 Craigslist ad headline that reads "str8 dude - m4m - strictly platonic".Derek is the fool who replies.

No Refunds or Exchanges by badwolfbadwolf

Stiles is the newest deputy in the Beacon Hills Sheriff’s Department, and has maybe just been a little in love with Derek Hale since Stiles had made a fool of himself in front of him at the SD summer picnic a few years ago. Being married to him—only for the sake of not getting deported—is going to suck in new and unusual ways.

To Feel Your Heart as It’s Keeping Mine by Vendelin

Stiles and Derek have been dating for four months, when Derek gets in an accident and loses all his memories from the past year and a half. Now, he’s once again the Derek Stiles used to despise, and even worse, Derek thinks that he still hates Stiles’ guts.

Kaleidoscope by Vendelin

Stiles spends a year before college working at the all-night coffee shop in town. It's nice and quiet, until one dark and brooding Derek starts coming in every morning, ordering coffee so strong that it should not be fit for human consumption. Ever. Stiles tries not to be affected by the mystery guy, but it's not like anything else happens around here, so really, what did you expect? And when he's already in too deep, he realises he might even be in way over his head...

There is a Brotherhood by minusoneday

So far, college has taught Stiles three things:

1) Eight am classes are cruel and unusual and should be avoided at all costs, even if it means having to enroll in something truly hideous instead, like Econ 101.

2) Dorm security is just as tight as Stiles’ orientation leader had promised it would be, and the dude guarding Scott’s dorm in particular does not respond well to bribes.

3) Mrs. McCall clearly had no clue what she was talking about when she’d insisted that Scott and Stiles needed to branch out and room with strangers, so it’s all her fault that Scott ended up with a total dick of a roommate and Stiles got stuck all the way across campus with some guy who has a girlfriend two towns over and is thus never around.

Or, the one where pledge brothers Stiles and Scott start a prank war with Derek Hale's fraternity.

A Desperate Arrangement by mikkimouse

"I'm sorry, I believe there's something wrong with my hearing," Stiles said. "Because I could have sworn you just told me you set up a betrothal agreement with the Hales. A betrothal agreement involving me. Me."

Scott smiled his easygoing smile and nodded, which told Stiles no, he hadn't misheard a damn thing.

After seven years of lengthy negotiations, the treaty between the Hales and the Argents has fallen apart and the two countries fell into war.

Months later, there's an uneasy truce, thanks to the intervention of King Scott McCall, but it won't last. In a desperate attempt to maintain the peace, the Hales sign a treaty with the McCalls to marry Prince Derek to Prince Stiles Stilinski, King Scott's brother.

In the history of the world, there have been many better ideas.

487 by Finduilas

Two years after graduating from the Police Academy, Stiles decides to transfer to the Beacon Hills Police Department, where his father is Chief. But when he gets assigned his new partner, Stiles isn't so sure if the transfer was a good idea. Derek 'Officer Grumpy Cat' Hale isn't exactly his first choice of partner. Then again, Stiles really isn't Derek's first choice either.

Letters by ericaismeg

“Stiles, this is getting ridiculous. Can you please do something about it?” Lydia demands. “Do anything. I don’t care. Go up and kiss him, ask him to prom this year, write him secret admirer love letters, whatever. Just do something.”

***

OR: The one where Lydia sets up an email account for Stiles to "confess his love" for Derek. And as fate would have it, they also end up becoming friends in person at the same time.

Your Vision Borrows Mine by hazyascent

Stiles has encountered a fair share of monsters before, way out of his league - the kinds that children are afraid are hiding in their closets and under the bed.

He’d even become one himself when he was void. The nogitsune was in his house, his body, and his mind.

But the worst monster he’s ever faced took even more from him and got away with it.

It’s why Stiles has never really been as terrified of werewolves and kanimas and darachs as he should have been. They’re really not that scary, relatively speaking, and he has a whole team on his side. They always found a way to win - until they lost someone they really loved.

Stiles doesn’t know how to be normal, not after everything he’s done and everyone he’s hurt. The nogitsune is gone, but another monster is on its heels.

His uncle is back. And Stiles has never felt more alone.

[jade4813]

Sparks Fly, Chapter 2

Title: Sparks Fly

Rating: NC-17

Synopsis: Everybody knows sparks fly whenever Barry Allen and Iris West are together. Their mutual animosity is legendary. But when Iris returns to Central City to investigate recent sightings of a mysterious red streak, she discovers a hero she just can’t resist…and Barry struggles to hide the unrequited feelings he can’t deny.

Chapters: 2/?

Chapter 1

Barry could barely believe his eyes when he looked up and saw Iris on the other side of the yellow tape. They hadn’t seen each other in years. He had almost forgotten how the sight of her took his breath away. His heart started to race, just as it had the night they’d first met, when he’d reluctantly allowed himself to be dragged to a Phi Delta Epsilon party. He’d walked in and seen her across the room, and when their eyes met, for just a moment, time itself seemed to stop. He still remembered the way the rest of the world seemed to disappear when she walked towards him. When she asked him to dance and took his hand, he felt like his entire life had been building to that moment. And when she stepped into his arms, her breathy laugh in his ear sending a shiver of desire down his spine, he still remembered the thought that came unbidden to mind – I’m going to marry this girl someday.

Of course, that was before the two of them realized they couldn’t stand each other. But that had never stopped his body from reacting to her every time she was near.

Distracted by the memories – and trying to slow his racing heart – his voice was subdued as he stepped towards her. He wished he could see her eyes, but they were hidden by the sunglasses she wore. “Yeah, it has. Been a long time, I mean. Uh – I didn’t know you were in Central City.”

He watched as she sucked her lower lip between her teeth and lifted one shoulder in an awkward shrug. “Yeah, I just got back. I work for the CCPD now. Um, I’m a reporter.”

Barry opened his mouth to congratulate her on the new job, but what came out instead was, “You look amazing.” He hoped her tinted lenses hid his blush as he tried to recover, stammering, “I-I mean, it’s g-good to see you.” He lifted a hand to run it through his hair in an unconscious betrayal of nerves and grimaced when he realized he was still wearing latex gloves. The sight reminded him of what he was supposed to be doing. “You here on a story?”

Iris cleared her throat and tilted her face away, scanning the area behind him instead. “Uh, yeah, actually. Lieu – sorry, Captain Singh said I could talk to his CSI, but I didn’t – I didn’t realize it was you.” He watched her shift her weight from one foot to the other as she clutched the strap of her bag and wondered what she was thinking.

He wasn’t sure how to respond to that, so he stayed silent for several seconds, until it was clear she wasn’t going to say anything more. “Oh. Well. Is there something I can help you with?” he prompted.

He could swear he could feel the assessing weight of her gaze as she returned her attention to his face. After a moment, her mouth twisted, and he knew what she was going to say before she even shook her head. Still, he scowled in irritation when she took a step back, silently conveying her eagerness to leave, and replied, “No, I don’t think so. Could you give Julian Albert my card?” Digging into her purse, she pulled out a crisp business card. Barry slipped it into his pocket without thinking. “If he could give me a call and let me when it’s convenient to come by, I can talk to him then.”

Annoyed – if unsurprised – that nothing appeared to have changed since college, his voice was acerbic as he shot back, “I hate to tell you this, West, but if you want to meet with Julian, you’re going to need to go to the airport and not the police station. If you head out now, you can probably catch the last flight out.” He actually had no idea when flights to London would run, but it drove him crazy that his body couldn’t help but respond every time she was nearby while she seemed completely immune to him. There was something satisfying about seeing that he could get a reaction from her, even if only irritation – a muscle jumping in her jaw as she clenched her teeth. Still, she didn’t ask him what he meant. She probably didn’t want to give him the satisfaction. So into the silence that fell between them, he explained, “Julian went back to England.”

“Oh, really? When I talked with someone at the precinct and they gave me his name, they didn’t say anything about him planning to leave. What happened? Did you join the force and he decided he’d rather flee the country than put up with you for any longer than he had to? Can’t say I blame him,” she asked with an overly sweet smile.

Barry glowered at her. “No, I’ve actually worked for the CCPD for a few years, now. But I was out for a while, and he was just a temporary replacement until I got back.”

“Pulling your usual disappearing act, Houdini?”

He bristled at the familiar nickname she’d given him a decade earlier. “Actually, I was in an accident. I spent a few months in the hospital. In a coma. Thanks for asking.”

He expected her to make some sort of joke about him sleeping on the job, but she didn’t. Instead, she stepped forward and reached over the yellow tape to grab his wrist, wincing slightly when a spark of static electricity arced between them. But her voice was soft when she asked, “Really? Oh, god, Barry, that sounds terrible. I’m so sorry. Are you okay?” As though wanting to see for herself that he was unharmed, she pulled off her sunglasses and swept her gaze over his body, looking for any sign of injury.

When their eyes met, he felt like the ground fell out from under his feet, leaving him freefalling. Suddenly ashamed of his behavior, he flushed. “I’m…better,” he replied, his voice thick.

He couldn’t move, couldn’t look away, until she blushed and released her hold on his wrist. “I’m…I’m glad,” she admitted in a soft voice. “Anyway, I should let you get back to work.”

As she turned to leave, he blurted, “Wait. Are you sure you don’t want my help? It’s been a long time. People can change, you know.”

She seemed to consider his question for a moment, but finally she gave him a firm nod. “I’m sure. People can change, but the truth is, they usually don’t.” 

Unable to think of words to convince her to stay – and uncertain why he even wanted to – he could only watch as she walked away. Out of his life. Again.

EXPLOSION AT S.T.A.R. LABS KILLS FIVE, INJURES DOZENS. Iris barely noticed the headline as she scrolled through the pages of the online newspaper. For the last few hours, she’d tried to put her unexpected encounter with Barry Allen out of her mind – with absolutely zero success. She finally convinced herself that she was just curious to know what had happened to put him in the hospital, and so she’d searched the online archives for his name. Finally, at the bottom of page three, she found the article. CCPD OFFICER HOSPITALIZED AFTER LIGHTNING STRIKE.

It sounded horrible, and her heart twisted at the headline. She’d just begun to skim the article when her phone rang. When she saw the name that flashed on her screen, Iris smiled and leaned back in her chair, stretching a few kinks from her back as she answered the call.

“Tell me you are not still at work,” the woman on the other end of the line chastised her before she could even finish her greeting.

Iris glanced at the time and grimaced and hit the button to turn off her monitor. Bending, she grabbed her purse out of her drawer. “What? I don’t know what you mean. I submitted my story hours ago,” she prevaricated as she moved hastily towards the exit.

“Which doesn’t mean you’re not still at work,” Linda pointed out. Iris stifled a sigh. That was the problem with being friends with someone long enough that they could tell when you were splitting hairs. “You really do have to get a life eventually, you know.”

“I will!” she cried defensively. “I mean, I do! I totally have a life! I’m just…still getting settled in, is all.”

To her relief, her friend let that one pass without comment. “So, how was your first day as an official part of CCPN? I’m sorry I couldn’t be there, you know. Stupid last-minute assignments. But we’re totally going to celebrate when I get back.”

“It’s all right, I understand. And it was great!” Walking towards her car, she said, “You’ll never believe who I ran into today. Barry Allen,” she supplied before Linda could guess. A long moment of silence greeted that revelation, so she pressed, “Linda, why didn’t you tell me he’d been in an accident? It sounds pretty serious.”

She heard the heavy sigh on the other end of the line. “Honestly? I wasn’t sure that you’d want to know.” At Iris’s offended gasp, she exclaimed, “I didn’t mean it like that! But it’s just…look, everybody knows how to two of you are. You’ve never gotten along. And you had a lot going on. Your engagement with Eddie had just ended, and you were…well, I just figured you had enough to worry about that a freak accident involving some guy you couldn’t stand in college probably wouldn’t be your primary concern.”

Iris understood where Linda was coming from, but somehow the words still hurt. “I wouldn’t say I couldn’t stand him. I mean, okay, we were never friends.” She felt a slight twinge of guilt as she said the words, telling herself it was just a little white lie. They never had been friends…exactly. If she told Linda now that there had been a couple times they might have become something more, she’d never live it down. Ignoring the memories, she continued, “But that doesn’t mean I hated him. I mean, he wasn’t just some guy. He was your friend. He was part of the group. If I’d known he’d been in an accident, I would have come by. I always assumed the two of you stayed in touch after college.”

“We have,” Linda admitted. “I don’t see him as often as Caitlin does, but we grab lunch together once a month or so. Listen, I’m sorry, Iris. If I’d known that you’d want to be there, I would have told you. I mean that. I just assumed that you…you know…”

“That I wouldn’t care,” she finished with a sigh. It still hurt a little, but she could hardly blame her friend. Her friends, really. Her fights with Barry had been practically legendary back in the day. She supposed in their shoes, she’d have assumed the same thing. “So, how long was he in a coma?”

There was another long silence before Linda admitted in a reluctant voice, “Um…about…nine months.”

“Nine months??” she practically shrieked in shock. “Jesus, Linda!”

“But he’s okay now! I mean, you obviously know that if you saw him today. He was in a coma for a while, and the doctors weren’t sure if he would come out of it. Then one day he just…did. It was…amazing, if you want to know the truth. So, are you working with him on a story, then?”

Iris snorted. “Hardly. I mean, I’m glad he’s okay, but you know what it’s like when two of us are together. We’ve always been like oil and water. Toothpaste and orange juice.”

“Gasoline on a fire?”

Iris grinned. “More like cyanide and…well, pretty much anything, I guess.”

“So, which of you is the cyanide?” Linda asked with a laugh. 

Feigning offense, Iris tried not to laugh in return as she retorted, “I’m going to pretend that you didn’t even have to ask.”

Barry leaned back in his chair and sighed, staring at the small scrap of cardstock on the desk in front of him. The edges were no longer crisp; though new, the card already looked slightly worn from being handled so often over the last few days. 

He tried to turn his attention to the stack of cases by his elbow, but his attention was drawn once more to the card’s lettering.

Iris West Central City Picture News

Her e-mail address and phone number were emblazoned below, and Barry stared at the string of digits. He could call her and apologize. They’d never gotten along, but that didn’t stop him from feeling guilty over his behavior. He’d given in to his frustration that she didn’t want anything to do with him. Just like he always did. But if she was working the crime beat for CCPN – as seemed likely, given her appearance at one of his crime scenes – then their paths were bound to cross again. They didn’t have to like each other, but surely they could be professional.

That decided it. He would call her and suggest a truce. It was time to put the past behind them. Before he could lose his nerve, he picked up the phone and dialed the number on the bottom. It was only when the phone started to ring that he glanced at the clock and realized it was after nine. There was no way Iris would be working so late. Well, he could leave a message, he decided. Then the ball would be in her court, at least.

However, much to his surprise, Iris answered the phone after the third ring. Her voice was a little higher than usual as she answered. “Hello?”

“It’s Barry. Um…Barry Allen.” He grimaced, realizing how lame he sounded, but he’d called her on impulse, before taking the time to think through what he would actually say. “I was calling about the other day. I wanted to apologize–”

“What? Barry? I appreciate that, but this really isn’t a good time.” He straightened abruptly in his chair, hearing the tension in her voice.

“Iris? Where are you? Are you okay?”

Lowering her voice, Iris murmured quickly, “Listen, I need you to call Singh right now. Tell him if he wants to know who’s running the operation to smuggle in the drugs that have been flooding into the city lately, he should send a squad to Cavendish Tower. Eighteenth floor. Tell him – hold on.”

He heard Iris move, and then silence for a long moment. Finally, he heard her yelp as a muffled voice on the other end of the line said, “Well, well, well. What do we have here? Someone poking their nose where it doesn’t belong?”

Another voice replied, “Get rid of her. No, not the gun. Do you want the police crawling around this place? Make it look like an accident, stupid.”

Barry was moving before the sentence was finished. Luckily, he’d stored a spare suit nearby, because he doubted he would have bothered to take the time to change, otherwise. Even though his speed let him change into his suit in a fraction of a second.

Though he’d spent endless hours in training in the last few months, trying to test the limit of his speed, he had no doubt he ran faster than he ever had before as he raced to the Cavendish Building. On the other end of the line, he heard the unmistakable sounds of a scuffle, followed by a man cursing. Then his heart stopped as he heard glass break.

“Throw her out!” one of the men yelled.

Barry was still a block away when he saw a large figure toss Iris through the open window, her petite body falling towards the ground below. Although he hadn’t yet tested whether he could move fast enough to run up the side of a building, he didn’t have time to doubt himself or second-guess his plan of action.

Pushing himself even harder, Barry ran as fast as he could. His eyes locked on Iris, he barely noticed that his plan was working. He was actually running up the side of a building. Instead, he focused on her angle of descent, realizing only a second before he reached her that she was falling too far away from the building. If he wanted to catch her, he would have to jump.

Although part of him was scared that it would cause him to lose just enough momentum that the two of them would go hurtling towards the ground, he didn’t hesitate. When he was a few feet away from her, he crouched quickly and leaped into the air as high as he could, swallowing a silent prayer that it would be enough.

Barry almost sobbed in relief when she landed hard against him, but he knew he couldn’t stop yet or they would die. Straining to pick up the speed he’d lost in the jump, Barry turned and ran back down the building. Once back on the ground, however, he wasn’t sure what to do. Even with his mask, he was afraid she would recognize him if she got a good look at his face, and he wasn’t sure he should risk it. But he didn’t want to just leave her without asking if she was okay.

Acting on impulse, Barry ran a few blocks away and carried Iris up the side of a coffee shop that was closed for the evening. The roof was dark, too high for the dim glow of the street lights below to reach. It was only then that he stopped and held her close, savoring the feel of her in his arms. But he knew he couldn’t hold onto her forever. Breathing heavily – more from lingering fear than exertion – Barry slowly, reluctantly, put her back on her feet though he still held her tight against him. Standing like this, it was easy to forget the animosity that they’d shared over the years as he remembered the first time he’d held her in his arms. Like it had then, his body ached with the desire not to let her go.

“Phi Delta Epsilon? Really?” he asked, his voice filled with dread as they walked towards the front steps.

Cisco laughed. “It’s a party, not an execution. Come on! It’ll be fun!”

Barry snorted. “I’ve heard about their parties. I’m not entirely sure they aren’t the same thing.”

“Yeah, I probably wouldn’t have come either, except…if you saw the girl who invited me…trust me; it’s worth it.” Stifling a chuckle, Barry rolled his eyes and followed his friend inside. “I’m going to see if I can find her. Try to have fun, okay?”

As Cisco walked away, Barry stifled a sigh and scanned the room, hoping to see someone he knew to talk to. That was when he saw her, standing across the room. In her bright red dress, she had drawn a crowd of men to her like moths to a flame, but she looked like she wanted to escape. Then their eyes met, and he found himself unable to draw breath.

She murmured something to the man who was trying unsuccessfully to convince her to accept the drink he offered. Then she stepped forward, weaving her way through the crowd. Barry’s heart started to pound as she approached. Even in heels, she was tiny; he had to bow his head so she could murmur in his ear. “You look like you’re as happy to be here as I am,” she said, her voice lightly teasing.

“My friend wanted to come, so he dragged me along,” he admitted.

She nodded, as though he had only confirmed something she’d suspected. Wrapping her hand around his wrist, she gave it a tug. “Dance with me?”

“Are you sure? I’m not a great dancer,” he admitted, though he followed her readily enough.

The stranger wrapping her arms around his neck and started to move to the music, silently encouraging him to move with her. “Even better,” she replied, laughing in his ear.

“Just follow my lead,” she directed. She was intoxicating. He’d follow her anywhere. I’m going to marry this girl someday. The words came with an almost bone-deep conviction.

Oblivious to his thoughts, she turned, pressing against him as she lifted one arm to curl around his neck to run her fingers through his hair. Grabbing his hand, she brought it to her stomach, holding it in place. He moved his other hand to her hip, stroking the soft fabric of her dress.

I’m going to marry this girl someday.

Iris started to pull away to look up at him, and he sped behind her before she could get a good look at his face. “I-” He caught himself just in time. Using his speed to vibrate his vocal cords and face, he asked, “Miss West? Are you okay?” Iris froze as he stepped behind her until he repeated his question. “Are you okay?”

She turned slowly and stared at him with wide eyes. “Oh, my god. It’s you. It’s really you.”

[basshouse]

Of Politics and Road Trips

Welp, it seems like the time has come to address one of the gnarliest and most frequently asked questions of all time.  To be clear, that's gnarly for me and to me, respectively.  I’d also like to memorialize a recent road trip.  Before I start, though, let’s get grounded in the current context: it’s late summer IN MARCH; We are headed intro autumn, and there has been enough early snow that Mount Hutt was open for skiing (what?!?!).  I started my new job at Jade Software; the kids started a new school year in January, with Anily headed off to her first year of high school (5 years of high school here); both kids have changed to a new soccer club, which is much closer to the house (thank god); Anily made the A team; James is playing soccer and basketball and ridiculous amounts of Fortnite.  It’ll soon be a year that we’ve been here. We are right in the middle of a full 12 weeks of visitors and trips from/to the US. And in case you were wondering, the cat has managed to escape through open windows and doors a few times, but he’s always come back so I guess he’s ours for real :-)  

I still haven't submitted my dreadfully complicated tax return.  I am seriously procrastinating, and having visitors and reasons to road trip is helping/hurting. 

So!  BFGFAQ (big fat gnarly...you get it): It’s the political one.  From the Kiwis this usually comes in the form of “are you a Trump refugee?” or “what do you make of what’s going on over there?”  And even if it’s not an explicit question, how can I possibly answer the most frequent Q of all time -- “why did you move to New Zealand?” without considering how the political landscape of the US factored in?  I mean, you don't just up and move across the globe and leave a great place and a fabulous life without at least a mental checklist of pros and cons.  At least, most of us wouldn't.  And if you’re a grown-up (which we sadly have established that I am) and a contributing, aware, member of society (which I would argue that I am), your list must include considerations of the way your taxes are spent and people are treated in the place you live and how the outcomes of those things impact your lifestyle, your life, and the lives of other human beings.  Right? Right!  

MAJOR UPDATE:  A handful of days after I posted this, someone (likely an asshole white supremacist) shot and killed people in a CHCH mosque.  The city is still in lock down as I write this.  It is terrible and sad that  things like this happen anywhere, ever.  And I just want to say that as you read the ideas below, I’ll be watching closely the response of the NZ government.  

If there’s one thing that moving around the world to a place you’ve never been before, with a small family and no friends, and taking up a real life with a paycheck and a rent and a job does really well, it’s create an opportunity to reflect on the differences between where you were and where you are.  It also is extremely useful for considering, in a very real way, how the values you hold are (or are not) reflected in both a political system and a local way of living.  You really notice how political decisions, socioeconomic forces and cultural norms trickle into investments, infrastructure, bureaucracy, language, aesthetics, and interactions that impact you as you move through your day-to-day and learn how to get things done.  And because you’re an observer who is trying to become an insider, you may operate with less bias and pre- disposition to judge, more of a natural curiosity and interest in gathering information and then assimilating it and deciding over time. Chalk one up for perspective!  Happy to say this was the kind of experience and growth I hoped we’d all get through this adventure. 

Now, from the Americans this question usually comes in the form of something like “OMG, are you so glad you’re not here for this?” or “are public healthcare and lack of gun violence really as amazing as they seem from here?”.  Because, like me, most people I talk with on a regular basis feel something like this:

t least you do now, thanks to Willie Wonka’s and friend above, and this: 

So while I am not here in NZ without political bias or personal ideas of what’s right, wrong and important, I am more open minded to considering what’s good for this country and this context, and I have a stronger appreciation for the complexities of things all across the board since I’ve now gathered more data and had more experience. 

So, my American friends, in the interest of helping you draw some of your own conclusions, here is a segment I like to call Fact, Figures and Feelings:

America is amazing.  You have SO much of everything.  Including great food, tons of money, vast political power, and a really noticeable amount of homeless people.  I mean!  When I was in San Jose I felt so conflicted by both where to go for every meal and the fact that to get where I wanted to go I was uncomfortable with my own feelings and anxiety about possible conflict with the homeless and mentally ill folks I passed constantly. And it was often while I was walking into a convention center full of people trying to give away millions of dollars, listening to speakers who had made millions through technology. And while the dog adoption station on site and the furry friends in it made me feel a little better in the moment, could there be anything more cliche? Embarrassing. And yet is it fundamentally bad to have cute dogs making rich people feel good and maybe getting adopted?  No.  But it maybe uniquely American. 

Know what else you have a lot of, USA?  DRAMA.  Seriously.  The NZ morning news is usually about 25-50% reporting on the shitshow that is US and Brexit, and it turns out that when people say “if you get homesick, just listen to the news” they are correct.  

So what about NZ?  Well, when you live in a country with SO MANY FEWER (like so many!) people and a much smaller GDP, your reality is very different.  Not so loud.  Not so busy.  Not so many options. Much much simpler and frankly, it feels more sane. But we know the Mexican food sucks.  So... six of one/half dozen of the other?  This is what I am saying: I cannot tell you if Enchiladas and Aveda products make up for dealing with the opioid crisis if you’re seeing it every day, or if leaving Tito’s vodka and a much higher salary on the table is balanced out by the fact that police here in CHCH carried guns last week and this is how people think about it: 

FUN FACT: During the “summer holidays” (December-Jan), the morning news show on public radio literally went off air.  They replaced it with special summer programming, mostly dedicated to personal profiles and reviews of music and activities.  The only headlines they read each day were almost entirely about the US (shut downs) and UK (Brexit).  Apparently it’s possible for time off to extend to politics and news.  WOW.  Just notice how you feel about that. 

Now, NZ is certainly not the rainbows and unicorns utopia we liberals like to think a place with a public healthcare system and affordable education and far fewer guns will be -- there’s a growing imbalance in the distribution of wealth, the abortion laws are archaic, affordable housing is a big issue, nurses and teachers strike because they don’t get paid enough.

Politics was not the only motivator for our move, but we considered it -- sure seemed like a nice time to be out of the US, and it is.  It’s certainly not a clear #NZFTW-100% -they -nailed-it situation, though.  Every place and every system has its bad sides, and I have a lot to learn to really decide how the pros and cons balance out. All I know��is that it’s really, really nice to be in a place where the political conversation is much simpler and more focused on politics and their outcomes on people than on hateful rhetoric. I am disappointed when I think of the lost opportunity due to the amount of resources you are wasting on unproductive, unkind conversations in the USA, when you have so much.  I feel bad for not being there to help stand up for the rights of people I believe in, but when you don't wake up angry every day at the headlines and the people you share space with, when the dialog is a little more open and productive, when the headlines are not so likely to be violent and sad, you start with a much better mental health baseline. You just can’t eat a great caesar salad whenever you feel like it, and it’s expensive as hell to leave the island and you don’t get paid enough to be able to do it often, which may really stress you out. For now, I’m really ok with it. But over time will the flaws in the NZ system (every system has them) outweigh the positive?  Do the opportunities in the US outweigh the negative? 

In the interest of letting you form some your own opinions: Take a look at the the top headlines of 2018 in New Zealand.  They include a pregnant PM; visits from Ed Sheeran, the Royals, and Obama; a handful of natural disasters; a bunch of news about other countries and sports; and the BIG BIG Drama which “unfolded over several deeply uncomfortable days” and ended in a minister being briefly admitted to a mental health facility and broad discussions about mental health.  Consider if the US was as concerned about its politicians’ mental health when they did crazy shit :-). 

Oh also, this is my CEO at work on Friday (hee hee): 

So far this year Lime Scooters (people get hurt on them, and people break the rules and double ride with no helmets -- gasp!) and the potential of a capital gains tax have been in the news pretty much daily. And that’s about it. Boring? Yes! Nice? Also yes! Did you know NZ is the only country in the OECD to not have a CGT? Are you impressed with my knowledge of initialisms? Worldly is the word you’re looking for to describe me.

I know, it looks like I am pooping on a trail, but I am actually doing squats mid-hike IN A SKIRT.  Probably gives me enough credibility to become a world leader, or at least present these numbers for your consideration: 

Now that you have something to think about -- because you weren't already thinking about politics enough (sorry!) -- let’s turn to a less political, but more important spiritual and philosophical topic: The Art of the Road Trip.

Pro tip: It’s easier to be a Road Trip Rembrandt with the right tools -- like these:

Mountains + Vans = Roadtrip Masterpiece

I think I mentioned in an earlier post that one of the things we’ve been doing a lot of is road tripping. Not so different from Seattle, eh? True. But since we can surf so close to the house and we have such a beautiful country to explore and a slightly less active social life, the road trips are more frequent and more varied.  As we are all happiest when we’re in the flow and hitting the right balance between challenge and success, I guess it makes sense.  Because if I do say so myself, we are damn good at the road trip, but there’s no way to have 2 to 6 people in a small space with a lot of stuff and a windy road ahead and podcasts and music to choose without challenge.

#vanlifeisthebestlife.

Here’s a map of where we’ve been on our travels thorough the country so far: 

So what’s the art of the road trip?  Composition: 

And the science?  One part great music, one part planning, and at least two parts having a sense of humor and joy about all the chaos. 

Like when there’s no where for you to sit: 

My most recent road trips were extra awesome due to the fact that Leslie Lapham (AKA Alex, AKA LL) was here and we took off on a few fun adventures. Now, Leslie is great for a lot of reasons and it was super fun to have her here for 5 weeks...and one of her best qualities, she takes great pictures!

Here’s what I like to say about our first trip:  it started with a bang and ended with a bee sting.  

Here’s the bang -- this is what happens when some dickhead decides to pass you on the right at high speed on a highway while you are TURNING RIGHT into a campground: 

So, that sucked.  Especially because aforementioned dickhead did not stop to see if we were ok, just left us there in the dark on our own. Luckily the Taupe Donkey was still drivable and packing enough duct tape to make it work.  So, off we headed from Kaikoura to make ourselves feel better in the vineyards and wineries of Marlborough.  

The Cloudy Bay Winery was not a bad place to spend an afternoon!  

Watson’s Way (not pictured) was a really weird place to spend a night though -- we were basically parked in a gravel parking lot in someone’s yard.  But man, did we have some good food! 

Although oops, I accidentally tried to take a grapevine as a souvenir.  And I swear this was before I even did a tasting!

After wine tasting and an amazing dinner at Arbor, we headed to the Marlborough Sounds, starting at Havelock, the mussel capital of the world!

We did a cool tour on the mailboat, which literally delivers mail, packages, animals, groceries, and god knows what else (possibly the odd tourist by accident?) to the residents of the remote 300 or so bays in the region, which can only be reached by boat. 

We ate a lot, of course.  But we ordered more than we could eat. 

After that we headed south on the inland route and camped overnight at the Tasman Lakes National Park.  

There were eels, pretty views, and random dock yoga.  

And last but definitely not least, we topped off the trip by meeting Jason at the always fabulous Hanmer Springs Thermal Pools.  What a drive to get there, too!  I did get stung by a bee while I was soaking, which was a total and pretty painful shock, despite the signs warning people to watch out for bees.  Little fuckers! 

After that, back to co-working and a couple weekends in CHCH:

Then...Lois!!! 

Now this blog is not about all the visitors and it’s already so long I dare not start going on about having Leslie and Lois here together.  Suffice it to say we had some fun times, some great food, and after 8 hours in the emergency room we did a quick road trip to Oamaru.  There were PENGUINS!!!!

There were penguins!!! We saw them waddle onto the beach at dusk after swimming 50K through the ocean all day.  Alas, you cannot take pictures of them, so you’ll have to settle for 3 Generations of Wachsmuth Women in the Wild until next time.  XO. 

[briankoning]

Don’t Waste YOUR Time with Social Media

7 Reasons Businesses Should Hire a Social Media Guru

– Unless you’ve been living on a deserted island for the past decade, you are acutely aware that almost everyone in developed countries is posting, texting, tweeting, pinning and doing whatever else it is they do on social media.

It’s estimated that approximately 90% of all purchases now start with some type of online search. It might be a search for a product or service. But many times, purchases happen because of the carefully crafted ads and posts on social media. A well-crafted ad with a strong headline, compelling copy and an eye-catching graphic hooks us like largemouth bass slamming a top-water lure in a quiet cove on Kentucky Lake early in the morning. 

Okay, so my mind drifted to bass fishing for a second. But you get the point.

The point is, social media is everywhere and, whether you like it or not, it influences our purchasing decisions and often results in impulse purchases. I’ve purchased shoes, music equipment, gifts, and more just because of an ad that popped up on Facebook. Just last week, I instantly clicked on a Facebook ad and purchased a flexible iPhone charger thingy that will allow me to stop having to prop my phone against something when I’m recording video. Now, I have to wait for about three months for it to arrive on a slow boat from China!

As a business owner and entrepreneur who has an excellent grasp of social media and digital marketing, I can tell you that social media is exhausting. It’s also very time-consuming. I’ve invested tens of thousands of dollars in workshops, conferences and mastermind groups over the last six years to learn everything I can about social media and digital marketing. And, as soon as I feel I’ve mastered something, it changes. Digital marketing and social media are fluid and literally change hourly. It’s complicated.

For the average business owner, unless you’ve been riding the social media wave and thoroughly understand Facebook/Instagram advertising, Google AdWords, Twitter, LeadPages, landing pages, Click Funnels, and all the analytic tools to measure the results of your digital marketing, it will take you years and a lot of training and money to catch up. Sure, you can do it, but at the risk of your business failing because your time will be spent learning rather than selling. Six or seven years ago, it took me the better part of a day to launch a Facebook ad. Today, it only takes me about 30 minutes. For someone who knows nothing about creating a targeted Facebook ad and is not tech savvy, it would take a couple of days to launch even a basic ad that “might” generate a few leads.

So, what is the solution?

Hire a social media (or digital marketing) guru.  Here’s why…

You Can’t Maintain It

Social media for businesses is practically a 24/7 job. Sure, you start out with great intentions but you’ll get sidetracked by the things you should be doing… like managing the leads and closing sales. Before you know it, days and weeks have passed since you’ve posted anything or even checked for the leads that came in.

You’re Not Technical Enough

You can’t just send out a Tweet, post a photo on Instagram or boost a Facebook post that says, “Here’s my widget, buy it!” and yet that’s what a lot of business do. I see businesses all the time that have great products and services but their social media sucks. It’s killing them. Then, there are businesses that suck but are tech savvy and they are getting all the business. Those businesses know how to connect the dots using technology. They know how to find the most popular search terms. They know how to use Google Analytics or Facebook analytic tools. They know what hashtags to use. They know how to get thousands of likes, followers, and fans. They direct prospects to “landing pages” and they use “trip wires” to get people to opt-in, get put into a “drip email campaign” or “auto responder’ and become invested in the sales process. Social media is very technical and is an intricate, tangled web that requires a individual who understands how everything works together.

You’re Too Invested In Traditional Marketing

Hiring a social media expert takes a leap of faith. It’s an investment. Do you need to hire a full-time social media person? Not necessarily. You can contract a social media expert. We’re out here! I suggest re-allocating some of your budget from traditional marketing/advertising channels that are now obsolete and ineffective and actually use it to bring your digital marketing up to speed. Do you know how inexpensive Facebook advertising is? For the price of a print ad in a glossy neighborhood magazine that maybe reaches a couple hundred people one time, you can run a Facebook ad and reach tens of thousands of target people multiple times over the course of weeks or months?

You Don’t Really Know the Market

You may think you know who your ideal customer is. But, there’s nothing like a reality check when you run the social media analytics tools available and see who is responding to your posts and ads. For example, a client who runs an athletic training program for youth sports was convinced that they needed to target “dads”. However, the analytics report showed that it was actually “moms” and most were “single moms” who were looking for a program for their kid(s). I talked to an owner of a lawn care company who was running Facebook ads to every single homeowner within a 25-mile radius of the business. The analytics showed him that the ideal client was “male”, “40-65”, “homeowner”, “employed”, “household income>$80,000”, “married”, “college degree”, “Home value $200K+” and lived within a “7-mile” radius of his business. These are all some of the demographics and attributes you can select when running an ad, thus filling your pipeline with more qualified prospects. Don’t assume!

You Don’t Have a Plan

Social media experts thrive on the hunt and flushing out qualified leads. But they have a plan. They create “roadmaps” that carefully time the ads, posts, tweets, etc… They know from analytics what time of day most people will be on social media. They use tools to schedule posts, time emails, and create drip campaigns. Just randomly posting a photo on Instagram or sending out a tweet of you having coffee at your desk does absolutely nothing. Remember that ol’ saying, “Failing to Plan is Planning to Fail!”

You’re Too Close to Your Business

As a business owner, you’re not always objective. It’s like a mom who believes she has given birth to the most beautiful baby in the world. In her eyes, it is. But to the outside world, it may not be. A good social media expert will help keep you “on brand” and help you see your business from the consumer’s perspective. And then there’s the whole reputation thing. Social media opens you up to criticism and negative reviews by dissatisfied customers and disgruntled employees, potentially damaging your reputation. As a business owner, it’s easy to take that personally and even respond in a negative way. A social media expert can (and should) help control that and respond appropriately. I always tell business owners about the 3/30 rule… if you do something good, a customer might tell three people; if the customer has a “perceived” bad experience, they tell 30 people. Unfortunately, that “30 people” can grow exponentially if a negative review goes viral on social media.

You Don’t Have the Right Person On Your Team

The biggest mistake any business owner can make is to hand over the social media or digital marketing function to an admin, family member, or do it on their own. It’s time consuming. It is very technical. It requires someone who knows how the machine needs to be assembled to work efficiently. And just because you have a teenager or young adult that “thinks” they know what they are doing, they more than likely don’t. You need an expert that knows MARKETING and ADVERTISING and PUBLIC RELATIONS and SALES and so much more.

A social media guru (full-time or contracted) can bring the benefit of professional expertise to your social media campaign, but is it the best option for you? By exploring your own time constraints and being honest with your level of expertise, you can determine whether a social media manager is the best option for your business or whether you risk doing it on your own.

I’d be happy to talk with you about how I can help you create an effective social media and digital marketing plan to help you grow our business giving you more time to do the things you need to manage your business and enjoy more personal time.

Let’s talk!

[sterek]

lols legit i just love me my fluff and mutual pining and just all types of that wonderfulness, even with light angst tbh and i love me my HS Aus or college Aus or Human Aus or anything inbetween lmfao XD Ur brilliant and hope this isn't too much of a bother =D

Sorry it took so long, I got distracted! Here are some recs :) [Sorry if I don’t have a lot of light or human fics, most of my bookmarks are heavy werewolf angst oops. I went through half my bookmarks and this is already too long lol enjy!]

I’ve Been Everywhere With You by Leslie_Knope [61k, E]

“Dude, you should totally come with me.”

“What? Like on the road trip?“

“No, come with me. To Austin. Get out of Beacon Hills.”

Derek paused. “What?” he asked again.

He’s Not Mine by Sunnee [68k, E]

Derek comes home to find an abandoned werebaby on his front porch and Stiles volunteers to help him out. Surprisingly, that is just the beginning of his problems.

302, I Love You by paintedrecs [4k, T]

It was a beautiful summer morning—mid-70s with a light breeze, ideal weather for soaking up the sun without fear of overheating. If anyone asked, that was why Stiles was sitting on his balcony with a book he hadn’t touched in the last half hour and a mug of coffee he’d been absently sipping from, his gaze fixed on the parking lot several stories below.

Coincidentally, one of his neighbors—Hot Dude From 302, not that it was relevant—had chosen the same morning to wash his stupidly flashy Camaro.

Shyft by paintedrecs [6k, T]

Derek finally gave the driver more than a passing glance.

He was roughly Derek’s age and surprisingly handsome, despite the ugly plaid shirt he’d rolled up past his elbows. He had broad shoulders, honey-dark hair, a line of moles trailing enticingly along his cheek, and thick eyelashes framing dark eyes that glittered with humor. And he was laughing at Derek.

***

At the end of a long work day, all Derek wanted was to get home as quickly as possible. When his scheduled ride showed up—distractingly good-looking, driving a beat-up Jeep, and full of interesting conversation—Derek felt like his evening might turn out a whole lot better than he’d expected. Until his trust issues flared back to life, telling him "Stiles” wasn’t everything that he’d seemed.

Lovebitten by LunaCanisLupus_22 [10k, M]

The one where Derek gets bitten by a lovebug and Stiles is the first person he lays eyes on. Hilarity ensues.

Bricks by paintedrecs [8k, T]

“Mornin’, love,“ Derek says, and Stiles freezes in his arms. They haven’t exchanged official I love you’s yet, and Derek seems determined to derail Stiles’s plans to say it first. With fireworks. Or bubble baths. Something epic.

The point is, Derek barely even seems to realize he’s doing it, and it’s driving Stiles crazy.

Or: My first time writing a 5 + 1 fic.

remember my love by bleep0bleep [23k, T]

Stiles wakes up and suddenly the war is over, he’s no longer a penniless mage, and living in an exquisite manor married to the man he’s been in love with for far too long.

“It’ll be fine,” Stiles says gallantly. “I am certain I will just fall in love with my husband all over again, and I will find plenty of joy doing that.” He winks at Derek for good measure.Derek blinks.

ritten in the Stars by Quixoticity [26k, M]

Derek Hale is a lucky guy. He’s got a great family, good friends, and a fulfilling job as a tattoo artist.

He’s also one of the twenty-five per cent of the population born with a soul mark.

He likes his life, but he’s waiting for his soul-match. The odds of meeting them aren’t great but hey, Derek’s a lucky guy. He has faith.

He can’t believe how good his luck really is when one day his soul-match wanders right into his studio, all long limbs and copper eyes. There’s just one problem: Stiles is there to get his soul mark covered up. Permanently.

No Homo by RemainNameless [84k, E]

Stiles’ sophomore year starts something like this:3 FourLokos+ 1 peer-pressuring cat- 1 best bro to end all best bros= 1 Craigslist ad headline that reads "str8 dude - m4m - strictly platonic”.Derek is the fool who replies.

Cross our bridges when we come to them by RemainNameless [103k, M]

The five times Derek called the Sheriff “Dad” on accident and the first time he did it on purpose.

Our Hearts Are Tigers by skoosiepants [7k, T]

This is what Stiles figures out after a week of harboring Isaac: he’s kind of a dick, for a ten-year-old.

Turn a Little Faster by skoosiepants [3k, T]

He shifts back and forth on his feet and tries to psych himself up. He can do this. He’s a badass werewolf, he can totally tell Stiles that they accidentally got werewolf married because—because Stiles was thinking about him, and happened to give him a token of his, uh, affection under the silvery light of the last full moon. Platonic affection, Derek thinks sourly, so he doesn’t get why his wolf feels all warm and fuzzy and bonded all of a sudden.

Honestly, it’s like—why aren’t people accidentally getting werewolf married all the time, if it happens this easily?

Filter Out the Starlight by skoosiepants [12k, T]

“Why are you not more curious about me?” Stiles says when Derek’s got the door half open, sun spilling over the dark wood, dust motes spinning about his legs. Stiles is wearing fabric that hasn’t been invented yet, he’s clutching a smart phone to his chest, and he appeared out of nowhere, like an angel.

Softly, Derek says, “We all have our secrets,” and closes the door.

Or-

A heartbroken Stiles accidentally travels back in time to find his one true love. A harlequin-ish Christmas romance.

Under Yellow Moons by skoosiepants [17k, T]

They stare at each other, half-grinning, and Derek knows it’s definitely the absolute wrong time for this, but he wants. He wants to grin at Stiles over dinner every day for the rest of his life, baffled over yams and Moon Pie Day, and, god, crap, goddamn, when the fuck did he have time to fall in love?

Or

The life and times of Deputy Stiles and Supernatural Foster Dad Derek Hale

Lord knows it would be the first time by uraneia [12k, E]

Stiles is home from Berkeley for the summer, but only because he promised the pack. He’d rather not see Derek, because whatever the thing was that they were doing, they’re not doing it anymore, and it sucks.

Unfortunately, he doesn’t have a choice. The betas tried a magical remedy for Derek’s melancholy, and now Stiles has a three-year-old who looks like Derek. Stiles doesn’t know how to deal with that, and he definitely doesn’t know how to tell the betas he and Derek were secret fuck buddies for a year and a half.

You Smell Like Mine by bleep0bleep [13k, E]

People talk about the alpha instinct, an alpha’s head being swayed by a nice-smelling omega, or the desire to drop everything and show off. Derek’s never felt any of that. He’s just not that kind of alpha.

Then he meets Stiles.

The Prince and His Painter by Dexterous_Sinistrous [8k, G]

Stiles was always a sick child. He was never supposed to live beyond his infancy—shocking many when he reaches adulthood. With his inevitable death looming over his country, Stiles chooses to accept a successor through marriage. His advisors commission a painter to capture the prince’s likeness in order to advertise him to potential candidates. Only, Derek Hale isn’t like most painters—or humans, for that matter.

Certain Kind of Fool by saraubs [36k, M]

Derek, who has been dragged against his will to the same resort his family visits every summer, is determined to spend the next two and a half months sequestered in his room. His only friend, his sister Laura, is preoccupied with her newly-bonded mate, and doesn’t seem to care about anything but making him happy.

When Derek meets Stiles Stilinski, a sharp-tongued waiter, he thinks that this summer might not be a complete waste of time. There are only two problems: First, Stiles is human. Second, he doesn’t believe in mates.

Painful Maneuvers by saraubs [11k, T]

Still, whether or not the nurses want to hear it, Derek has some serious issues with the way Stiles skates around the ward, upending instruments and scattering papers and chewing on pens. His scrubs never fit right and are always riding up to show patches of smooth, pale skin and his hair is frankly pornographic. It’s just so…unprofessional.

Stiles is a hyperactive Obstetrician. Derek is a grumpy Midwife. It’s true love (and babies!).

little spoon by bibliosexual [6k, T]

To save money while attending college in NYC, Stiles and Derek decide to rent one tiny apartment together. With one bed.

you know you’re on my mind by bibliosexual [16k, T]

If there’s one thing Derek’s learned in life, it’s that crushing on someone who lives on an entire other fucking continent is probably a bad idea.

Put Down in Words by paintedrecs [203k, M]

“Oh,” Stiles said, his voice coming out low and breathy, “fuck me.”

“I don’t think that’s on the syllabus, but we can check to see if there’s a spot open in any of his classes,” Scott said, grinning.

“This isn’t an actual professor, though,” Stiles insisted, unable to resist brushing his thumb over the sharp line of the man’s bearded jaw. He was laughing at something off-camera, the shot taken in three-quarters view, his coat collar casually rumpled and opened to reveal a sliver of a simple grey t-shirt. The whole thing was deliberately calculated to lend him a more accessible feel, and god help him, Stiles was falling for it.

*

When Stiles signed up for Dr. Hale’s intro to history class, he had two goals: knock out the credits his advisor was bugging him to complete before he graduated, and spend a few hours a week daydreaming about his sexy professor’s salt and pepper beard.

Derek, a few months away from turning forty and not sure when his life had started feeling so damn lonely, had never encountered someone like Stiles before. Bright-eyed, sharp-tongued, determined to throw Derek’s carefully cultivated world into disarray…and absolutely the last person Derek should be falling in love with.

Somewhere Else, Someone Else by megxmas [19k, T]

They’re sitting in the car, and Stiles’ dad is poring over the scans, gesturing violently at the air. ‘I just don’t understand!’ he says. ‘There’s never been anything out of the ordinary on any of your tests, and yet you always have seizures! How come nothing ever comes up?’

Stiles shrugs, has heard his dad complain about this a dozen times before. Stiles is pretty sure that he and Derek are some kind of magical soulmates and this is the way the world has decided to connect them, but somehow, he doesn’t think that’ll fly as an explanation.

Cupboard Love by mklutz [32k, G]

He’s carefully balancing the sandwiches and the two biggest tupperware containers he could find that both had functioning lids when the front door opens and he almost drops everything right there in front of the stupid fountain.

If that’s Derek Hale, he’s definitely not a mountain man.

The Epic Love Story of Wolf and Twister by KeriArentikai [11k, E]

Stiles has a tiny adorable hyper puppy. Derek has an awesome huge Malamute mix. They both go to the dog park a lot.

So, obviously, Sterek ensues.

One life stand by Vendelin [84k, E]

Stiles is used to selling himself to make ends meet. But it’s getting harder to keep those ends meeting, and there’s only so much of Stiles to go around. Until a too-fancy car shows up in his neighborhood, and he meets Derek Hale.

All Derek wants is Stiles’s time, someone to stay on his arm for events and smile for the cameras. It’s the easiest job Stiles has ever had, the best-paying one he’s ever had, and he’s more than happy to sign up.

Derek is everything and nothing Stiles expects him to be, with his tailored suits, sharp mind and his quiet way of caring. But it’s just a job and Stiles never meant to fall in love.

only fools rush in by decideophobia [13k, T]

Is it an imaginary date?

No. I met him in a coffee shop.

When?

This morning. It was love on first sight.

Millstone by eleanor_lavish [31k, E]

Derek waits until the door is shut behind him before he turns around. He holds out his hand, plants his ‘if you’re not weird about it, I won’t be’ smile on his face and says, “Nice to meet you, Stiles. I’m Michael. What kind of a good time are you looking for tonight?”

In Other Words, Baby, Kiss Me by primroseshows [61k, E]

Stiles has simple goals in life. To successfully complete his secret radar project without getting fired, to get a cottage on the Moon, and to untangle his mess of feelings for Moon Station 3 deputy, Derek Hale. Heck, he’ll even settle for two of the three.

i have always been the storm by stilinskisparkles [25k, E]

“You’re all headed out to Oklahoma in a week.”

Derek snaps his head up, stares at him in horror, “No, boss.”

“Yes,” Finstock insists in a steely voice. “The NSSL have been on at us for a year about some decent exposure, and I think you’re just the team to do it.”

“I haven’t done weather since college,” Derek protests.

Boyd snorts again, presumably because he’s thinking back to the time when Derek and the weather last collided and he…. well, did the guy into the weather for a brief, wonderful, terribly foolish time. But, Boyd needs to shut up before Derek punches him on the nose.

Abominable by Revenant [20k, T]

Where Derek buys a secluded cabin halfway up a mountain, meets a yeti and falls in love with Stiles, but not necessarily in that order.

The Cintron Hall Situation by dragon_temeraire [3k, T]

Stiles is freezing and miserable in his dorm, so he decides to knock on his hot neighbor Derek’s door for help.

nothing ever promised tomorrow today by preromantics [11k, T]

Grocery shopping, waking up, lasagna, and parallel universes. / When Stiles jumps the last two stairs and turns into the kitchen he’s got his mouth halfway open around “Morning, Mom,” before his dad folds down his paper at the kitchen table to look at him.

In a Straight Line Down by standinginanicedress [40k, T]

“So you want to go to Prom with me just so you can get a plastic crown and a fifty dollar gift card to Outback Steakhouse.”

Stiles sets his jaw. He wants to go to prom with Derek because he wants to go to prom with Derek. But, of course, he’s stubborn and prideful and can’t admit to Derek how it’s barely been twelve hours since they officially broke up and he’s already barely handling it as it is, so he just raises his chin in the air and says, “yes.”

Our Puddle is Deceptively Deep by calrissian18 [10k, E]

They start out in a literal tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G.

In This World or the Next by Lissadiane [20k, T]

Derek wakes up to the smell of frying bacon and brewing coffee on an ordinary morning in his ordinary life, but he can’t help but shake the feeling that he’s forgotten something important. It probably has to do with the three wishes he’d been granted by the fae after saving the life of their fairy prince, and possibly also the sheriff’s missing son.

In which Derek Hale learns that sometimes being given what we want more than anything else has disastrous consequences.

The Socioeconomic Repercussions of Mutually Assured Destruction by alocalband [15k, E]

"The trouble with having the kind of brain that likes to write essays on male circumcision for an Economics class, is that it also likes to turn PowerPoint presentations for Biology into odes on the perfection of notorious bad boy Derek Hale’s backside.”

Five Times Derek and Stiles Kissed For Practice (And One Time They Didn’t) by mikkimouse [5k, T]

In which Derek and Stiles grow up together and practice kissing, roughly in that order.

Little Promises by crossroadswrite [2k, G]

Derek doesn’t really know what happened. He just knows there was a lady and she was pretty but she was also really mean and she was trying to hurt his friends.

“Holy fuck,” Erica mutters and is harshly shushed by Isaac.

“Don’t swear in front of the kid.”

“It’s not a kid,” Erica counters. “It’s just-“

“Derek?”

King of the Road by Stoney [30k, E]

Derek sees the guy–all long lines, furtive glances, hungry–leaning against the diner out in the middle of nowhere. Yeah, Derek’s hungry, too.

tide pulls from the moon by paintedrecs [45k, M]

hen Derek left Beacon Hills, finally ripping the tether free and remembering how to breathe, how to live again, it was Stiles who came after him. Stiles, who showed up at his door with blazing eyes, looking like he wanted to punch him in the face, but wrapping his arms around him instead, making him grunt in surprise at the raw strength of his embrace.

“You asshole,” Stiles said, slapping him heartily on the back as he extricated himself, his voice rough under his bright smile. “You couldn’t have made yourself harder to find, could you?”

The Summer of Snow Cones and Not-Dates by clarkoholic, skywardsmiles [38k, M]

Summer is really boring. Like, mind-numbingly boring. Except for the part where Stiles can’t figure out if Derek’s his boyfriend, or why every werewolf in town keeps approaching him in the bathroom.

Teenage Dream by matildajones [58k, M]

“I’m married. I’m married to Derek Hale,” Stiles says. Everything seems to hit him at once. He pushes aside the fact there’s a celebrity sitting right next to him, and then thinks of why the fuck he can’t remember him, why he doesn’t know who he’s married to, and how much time he must have lost.–After an accident, Stiles wakes up to what can only be a dream. He has money, he has fame, he has award winning actor Derek Hale as his husband. It quickly seems more and more like a nightmare because Stiles doesn’t remember getting any of it - and it’s hard to accept the reality that Derek can still love him.

You look like my next mistake by Vendelin [15k, T]

“So, are you dating someone new? Someone who doesn’t mind that you’re frigid?” Kate cocks her head to the side, smiling as though she just asked him about where he bought his shoes.

His entire body sighs in defeat as his shoulders grow square. Just as he opens his mouth, someone comes up to stand beside him, snaking an arm around his shoulders. When he glances to his side, expecting to see Isaac, his brain seems to malfunction. Because it isn’t Isaac. It’s Stiles Stilinski, the lacrosse talent of the year, a senior who Derek has seen multiple times from far away, but never ever talked to.

In which Derek is a nerd jock, and Stiles is a frat guy, and Derek falls for him even though he knows he shouldn’t.

A Problematic Loyalty by alocalband [4k, T]

The problem isn’t that Stiles is stubborn. The problem is that people keep hitting on him.

Not Quite Lost (Not Quite Found) by alocalband [25k, E]

A year after the nogitsune is defeated, Derek is living a quiet life in the mountains above a small town in Colorado.

Then Stiles shows up.

‘Till You Make It by standinginanicedress [46k, M]

“I’m saying – let’s fake it.”

Derek blinks at him. Hard. Stiles never knew that someone could physically make a blink look hard, but there Derek goes, slamming his lids together like he’s fucking exercising them. “Fake it.”

“Pretend, dumbass,” he backhands Derek lightly on his upper arm. “Pretend like we’re doing as well as our parents want us to and then they’ll be off our backs, right?”

“We don’t have to pretend anything, Stiles,” Derek says evenly, in a tone that suggests he’d much rather be yelling. “We’re literally soulmates.”

“That’s the beauty of it! It’s going to be so fucking easy. I can’t believe we never thought of this before,” he runs his hands through his hair and shakes his head in amazement, grinning from ear to ear. “Holy shit. I can’t believe I just solved all our problems for us, man.”

Kindred Spirits by Stoney [104k, E]

Stiles is the adopted son of the Sheriff, brought to Beacon Hills to hopefully stay for good. A family, a best friend, school, Jackson as Josie Pye (because who else could he be?) and the mystery of a dark haired, green-eyed boy which leads Stiles to discovering a secret within himself.

we’re catching bullets in our teeth (it’s hard to do but they’re so sweet) by prettyasadiagram [12k, M]

Stiles says he’s a Web Developer. Derek says he an Internal Auditor.

They’re both liars, but you can’t exactly tell your significant other that you kill people for a living, now can you?

Insane Chemistry (with Derek Hale) by theroguesgambit [13k, M]

Derek is the popular, varsity jock, prom king of the school, and Stiles is not going to be the cliche that ends up falling for him. (It’s not a cliche if no one else knows about it, right?)

Strut on a Line, its Discord and Rhyme by xiaq [61k, T]

“Carry me,” Stiles says.

“No.”

“But I’m injured.”

“You have a rash,” Derek says. “On your arm. Your feet work just fine.”

“Please?”

“No. You weigh almost as much as I do. And you ate a pound of chicken at lunch.”

"Well, yeah, but I pooped like an hour ago, so.”

“You’re disgusting.”

“Don’t play, you love me.”

I do, Derek thinks, relatively horrified. I really do.

But Then What… by Stoney [24k, E]

Senior year is almost over, and all Stiles needs to do is keep his head down to survive. A teacher calls in a favor, leaving him stuck tutoring Derek Hale, one of the most popular jocks in school and a member of a group of douchecanoes who have bullied Stiles for years. He’s someone Stiles totally hates. Totally. Like, doesn’t like him even a little bit. DEFINITELY isn’t attracted to him.

Except that is a total lie. Fuck his life, seriously.

The Great Pretender by talktowater [45k, E]

Stiles is the new kid at Beacon Hills High, class of 1958 and he’s trying to make an impression. Derek can’t figure out why this kid is so set on making such a bad one.

Here’s to the Static by matildajones [80k, T]

Stiles spends most of his college break in a coffee house where he stares after Derek Hale. For some reason, Stiles is unaware of the fact he’s quite the musician, and Derek amuses himself at Stiles’ obliviousness.

Cross a Canyon (with a broken limb) by theroguesgambit [18k, T

“You never graduated,” Stiles says, just to say it. To test it out in the open air. That’s… huh.

–

Stiles spends his senior year battling troll-gremlins, taking on an unexpected tutoring job, and definitely not falling for a certain sourwolf (even though everyone else seems to think he is).

The Rest Is Unwritten by mikkimouse [6k, T]

Once upon a time, the werewolf king and queen invited five fairies to the christening of their only son. The fairies bestowed the boy with gifts—beauty, grace, wit, and the most adorable teeth in all the land.

But before the fifth fairy could give her gift, a wicked fairy from the other Court arrived and cast a terrible curse on the baby prince. He would have a life full of tragedies, she declared, and die young, of a broken heart.

The king and queen were beside themselves with grief. It was very old, powerful magic, so there was little they could do to break it. However, the fifth fairy had yet to give her gift. The curse could not be broken, she told them, but it could be altered.

She bestowed upon the prince the gift of perseverance, so that he would never lose his will to live, even in the face of countless tragedies. And when he found the one who would stand by his side and face those tragedies with him without fail, that is when the curse would be broken. Because the fairy knew there was nothing in all the world more powerful than true love. Not even a wicked fairy’s curse.

Laying Groundwork by LunaCanisLupus_22 [10k, E]

His expression isn’t much to go by but the entire clubs howling gets louder at his appearance and Stiles literally pops a boner watching the guy’s big hands wrestle with the microphone stand.

Or the one where Scott and Stiles go clubbing and there’s this broody Bouncer out to get Stiles-

Or get into his pants. Thank God it’s the latter.

By a Law Divine by mirrorkill [23k, M]

Okay, so, kissing Stiles. That’s a weird thing that Derek’s doing now. He has no idea where it’s even coming from, especially considering bickering and fighting is their usual state of existence.And then he does find out where it’s coming from: A curse that’s making everyone in town kiss someone they have mutual feelings for. …yeah, Derek’s not even sure why he’s surprised by that.

Friends of Early Theory by Nanoochka [23k, E]

In which Derek is a gruff, struggling executive for his family’s sprawling, wealthy company in New York, and Stiles is his quirky, offbeat intern who brings him cold coffee each morning and wears stupid T-shirts to work and generally succeeds at being a thousand times more charming than Derek could ever hope to be. To the outside observer, their relationship is combative but fond, although in private Stiles and Derek have a great deal more secrets, anger, and painful history between them than Derek is prepared to acknowledge or reveal. In retrospect, that might be half of the problem.

The Way to My Heart (French Insults) by KuriKuri [10k, T]

Letting out a long sigh, Derek turns away and braces himself for the next hellish filming segment. After all, apparently he’s going to have to smile while greeting twenty-five contestants. Shit, what if they try to hug him? Or, god forbid, kiss –

He doesn’t get any further with that thought, because a limo pulls into the driveway. He braces himself for the worst. The worst, who… actually doesn’t look that horrifying.

“I’ve been dying to meet you!” she exclaims as she catches sight of him.

Then, she flings herself at him and ensnares him in a bone-crushing hug.

Scratch that – she’s completely horrifying. And Derek’s pretty sure he can hear errand boy what’s-his-face laughing in the distance.

(Or: In which Derek gets roped into being the 'eligible bachelor’ on a dating show and instead falls for one of the show’s interns.)

How I Met My Werebunny by Moku [19k, T]

“This is going to end in tears,” Scott told Derek while he watched the man easily lifting Stiles’ desk up with one hand and driving nails into the ceiling with the thumb of the other. “Probably mine.”

Or:

When a Stiles and a Failwolf love each other very much, they’ll engage in a prank war. Basically, it’s a mating ritual for dorks in love.

Wild Tonic by officerstilinskihale [11k, M]

Stiles nodded and smiled again, his teeth flashing brightly and he signed something again, before looking frustrated with himself.

“You’re welcome,” Derek told him, feeling a wave of relief when Stiles’ face brightened. That would’ve been awkward if Stiles hadn’t been trying to say thank you.

“I had a really good time, so yeah. I’m glad you came with me,” he said, feeling his face grow hot. Derek wasn’t usually like this. He wasn’t confident. Sure, he had the looks and he could flirt shamelessly when he got hit on, but he always got shy around the people he genuinely liked, not that there was too many of those.

But Stiles didn’t let him dwell on that. He gripped Derek’s arm, grinned cheekily and pointed at himself before lifting two fingers. It took a while for Derek to get it but when he did, he couldn’t stop a smile from spreading across his face.

Me too.

Practice Makes Perfect by blacktofade [21k, E]

In his sophomore year, Stiles gets dragged to lacrosse tryouts by Scott and ends up practising alongside the senior captain, Derek Hale. Stiles just wants to live long enough to become a junior.

Feline Persuasion by rensahannou (asmalltigercat) [15k, T]

Derek doesn’t need to worry about the cat living under the porch at his family’s old house, it’s just—Derek’s just used to worrying about things.

Hot Single Dad Derek Hale by WhoNatural [13k, E]

Wherein Derek is a Hot Single Dad, possibly with a little case of martyrdom, and Stiles is the newest client at his publishing house who really just wants to make him happy. Preferably while they’re both naked.

He doesn’t get to talk to Stiles a whole lot - and it’s fine, it’s professional and polite, but there is a little something that lights up in him when he thinks about him, sees him. Derek’s life has been mostly about preschool and Big Hero 6 and extra-curricular activities for so long now that it’s a shock to the system when he finds himself pre-occupied with something so… adult.And there are many, many adult things on his mind where Stiles is concerned.

I Call You Names Because I Love You by Rawren (Zimothy) [13k, M]

Years of touring with Stiles would never have prepared Derek for the day his beloved techie fell in love with someone else.

Maybe Someday (I’ll Be Home For Next Year) by ofherlionheart [16k, T]

AKA, the Grandma Stilinski fic. Derek Hale meets a Mabel Stilinski while living in New York. He learns that she has a grandson. There are miscommunications, scarves, stealth-matchmaking plans, and cookies. Many, many cookies.

my wings a hurricane by kellifer_fic [20k, T]

Stiles had been like any other kid growing up in the era of dragons. He’d watched the cartoons, the news stories, had the lunch box. When his screening at Beacon Hills High had come up negative, he’d been disappointed but unsurprised. His positive results were returned three years too late for it to be in any way convenient or cool.Or, the one where they ride dragons.

Thrill (like white-hot wire) by raisesomehale [4k, M]

Stiles made the decision that Derek was his new best friend (and that he’ll one day marry him) the day he shared his dinosaur chicken nuggets with him.

The Newlywed Game by Captain_Loki [19k, M]

Stiles is (still) single when the pack’s getaway to the Caribbean comes by (oh misplaced optimism); lucky for him Derek is committed to being uncommitted and even after all these years is still powerless against Stiles’ unique forms of persuasion.

Cue a romantic getaway for two: sun, sand, and sarcasm abound…and the two roped into competing in the Resort’s version of the Newlywed game. Only it’s completely obvious it’s going to end in disaster. Probably homicide.

Most probably homicide.

Plot twist: It doesn’t.

[Sleep]Walking After You by relenafanel [59k, M]

Derek is a sleepwalker who keeps wandering into his downstairs neighbour’s bedroom.

Stiles is pretty sure the hot guy from the park is going to kill him in his sleep. He knows he shouldn’t have been so obvious about objectifying the guy’s really fine ass.

Too bad it turns out Derek is easier to get along with when he’s sleeping.

[ithisatanytime]

i deny the holocaust

 Most of the “EVIDENCE” is witness testimony gathered during the nuremberg trials, and those were a fucking joke and everyone knew it. the “confessions” are now known to have been extracted via testicular torture, which is like regular torture but they torture your fucking balls, many of them had shattered testicles and all of them suffered beatings during interrogations. which sure fine if they were cold blooded murderers of 6 million innocent people, but the holocaust narrative is psychically impossible, and frankly, stupid. incinerating the bodies the way they say, is impossible, literally impossible, and there are testimonies given of bodies cremated regularly in under a half hour, which is fucking absurd. with modern tech, under ideal conditions, it takes over an hour, and then there is maintenance that needs to be done, and when i say an hour i mean from the time the furnace turns on until the body is reduced to ash, and cremation technology has come a long way in the eighty years since the holocaust never happened. with modern technology, under ideal circumstances, meaning you dont even have to load bodies in, or clean out the furnaces or maintain them, again with MODERN technology, it would have taked no less than 30 years to do what they said was done in 4. its beyond impossible, its actually ridiculous, and this is when you give the narrative every conceivable advantage.

   There were  tons of jewish concentration camp survivors who were interviewed by steven spielburg for his film schindlers list, their interviews were used as part of a making of documentary. they left out the dozens of “death camp” survivors who described the death camps as work camps, where no one was gassed, and they were treated rather fairly, there was even currency printed specifically for the deathcamps so that they would get paid for their work, there were hospitals that treated the ill (both of the most famous first hand accounts of the holocaust, “Night” and “the diary of anne frank include accounts of jews being treated for illnesses at on site hospitals, not experimented on just treated) which makes sense if you are running a work camp, and makes no sense if you are running a death camp. also the emaciated figures we see, i think these comprise the most compelling of the evidence, its a striking visual, until you look up american pows in japan, and see those same gaunt figures, google it right now and click images, tell me those men are not the same as the ones you see in the holocaust propaganda, typhus was pandemic around the world at the time, and thats what it does to you. notice the piles of emaciated corpses, never a fat corps among them in the photos, but according to the propaganda, most of the jews were killed upon arrival at the camp, and yet they appear to be either in the advanced stages of extreme starvation OR suffering from typhus. there are documented cases of the guards at these “death camps” (work camps) who were EXECUTED for STRIKING and stealing from prisoners, seems like a terrible waist of manpower if the goal was to kill them all anyway, the red cross inspected many of what we once called deathcamps and found no evidence of any wrong doing, not once. there are no aerial photographs from spy planes depicting the massive smoke that would have been created by continuosly cremating bodies (at impossible speed and/or volume). there exists not one single document even referencing this massive industrial under taking, and the germans were notorious for keeping records. i could litereally go on all day, but again the reason you believe this impossible story has nothing to do with evidence and everything to do with emotion.

  in my early twenties i would be exposed to some holocaust denialism, and it was always swiftly debunked. this is a tactic called (ironically) poisoning the well, whereby you purposefully seed your enemy with bad arguments to be used against you so you can easily tear them apart and make anyone questioning the narrative seem ridiculous as a result. so i was pretty skeptical until i did the math myself. its not possible, its not even close to possible, there is no way in this universe that happened. The tiny minority of ethnic jews did in germany what they attempted to do in every country they ever lived in, they took over. the german revolution of 1919 just after world war one ended, communist jews (look up the leadership of the 1919 german revolution, 7/10 were ethnic jews) and the german people were subjected to all kinds of terrible shit, mostly starvation as they bled the country dry from the top. they were also pushing things like gender theory (first ever gender reassignment was in berling, just prior to hitlers rise to power) promoted prostitution, owned the newspapers and film studios. basically everything we are seeing in america and the rest of the west today, it was called the weimar era, and the germans living under the weimar jews universally despised them. when the nazis rose to power they tried to deport the jews living in germany but no one wanted them, you see ethnic jews were notorious for doing this kind of thing, they had been kicked out of over 100 countries throughout history as a result of doing this kind of shit, so no other countries wanted them seriously there was a meeting of dozens of leaders from countries around the world and the only country who agreed to accept jews was the fucking dominican republic. they would still have this reputation today, if not for the holocaust narrative making any kind of racial classification the ultimate taboo, thats in part why they invented it, the other part was to justify britain just awarding them someone elses country while they were still living in it! the fact that they got away with that is amazing, really think about that if nothing else, because something bad supposedly happened to them, they were just GIVEN a COUNTRY that not only didnt belong to them, but was inhabited already by muslims who believed it to be their sacred land. its insane! anyway hitler just wanted to deport them and he tried (google the haavara agreement, its literally excepted history that hitler tried like hell to deport them, which is a bad idea if your final solution is the complete annihilation of the jewish race and not to deport them) when the jews around the world declared war on germany (literally a new york times headline at the time) via staging a massive worldwide boycott using the papers they owned and all the political clout they purchased via owning the international banking cartels, germany had jews registered and placed into seperate housing so they could not try to stage another revolution, they had already done it several times in germany with the spartan uprising and others, eventually even successfully overthrowing the government during the aforementioned german revolution of 1919. and then he had them put into work camps when even then they revolted violently. america did exactly the same thing, putting its ethnic japanese population in internment camps for fear of a rebellion within the country or acts of sabatoge or espianage, literally the same thing at the same time for the same reason. there were no gas chambers, they literally tell you the crematoriums are reconstructions at the death camps, because hitler “had them blown up”. there were crematoriums at the death camps, remember typhus was pandemic at the time, but the showers were just plain old showers. no jews were gassed whatsoever, an american doctor traveled to the death camps in poland (except they were work camps) and performed hundreds of autopsies, in an attempt to prove that people were gassed, he found not one single body had been gassed via cyanide out of over a hundred autopsies performed, they had died from typhus, basically got dysentary and shit themselves until they starved, it sucks but it was happening all over the world even in the pacific theater. and again the timeline for the burning of just the six million is beyond impossible and remember he supposedly killed 11 million total in his impossible deathcamps with its impossible ovens.

  I know this is hard to swallow, but you have to swallow it, because its fucking IMPOSSIBLE, you cant burn that many bodies in that amount of time, with the crematoriums they supposedly had, remember all of them are “reconstructions” built by the soviets after the war by their own admission, because hitler supposedly blew them all up. so when people say “have you been to the death camps because i have!” what they are really saying is, i saw the work camps and the crematoriums built after the war, and i was lead as part of a tour into a shower where i was told a spooky story that made me sad. its fake. it has to be fake or else the laws of physics are fake. you can call me a nazi if you want, but what does that mean? its only bad because the nazis killed millions based on their race, but im telling you they literally couldnt have, not how they say that they did. remember its illegal to say what im saying in most of europe, france germany many others, and people are currently in prison, for just questioning it! i do believe jews were killed in eastern europe by germans and others, but you have to understand they were angry for the jews had been killing gentiles for years, thats what the “red terror” was! and there were many massacres of european christians at the hands of communist jews. so some towns killed them as soon as their hegemony was broken. i dont think thats right, but find me a war where this kind of thing doesnt happen and ill give you ten bucks. that other impossible thing? never fucking happened it couldnt have. i could go on forever, but the fact is its not on me to prove it didnt happen, its on someone to prove that it did. remember witness testimony is pretty weak, and you cant convict based on that alone, and evidence of work camps isnt evidence of 6 million gassed and incinerated jews, that is an extraordinary (impossible) claim that requires extraordinary (IMPOSSIBLE) evidence.

[orionsangel86]

Regarding an ask you answered a few days ago, debating Destiel vs Johnlock, and brought up the difference between CW and BBC, and I just wanted to add something to that. You said that the CW isn't necessarily the most progressive network, and while I agree, they DO have one of (if not THE) most progressive shows on the air right now, Crazy Ex Girlfriend (I know, the title sounds bad, and the premise sounds worse, but the show is LIT) and I think that shows the CW is willing to take risks :)

Hey, so yeah I have heard that the CW has done progressive things before though I don’t know anything about that show. I’ll give it a go then if it is progressive as so much TV nowadays bores me to death.

The problem with the BBC is that it is funded by taxpayer money. Therefore whenever anything even remotely controversial is aired on the BBC they get inundated with complaints from miserable people who feel totally entitled and believe that since they pay a license fee, they get to dictate everything the BBC creates.

So the BBC is careful. They do try to include diverse shows but these shows are generally promoted as diverse to begin with. There really can’t be any surprises on a BBC show, because people would literally sharpen their pitchforks. (yes the Great British Public are a fickle bunch and far too many of them read the Daily Mail). I was thinking about this the other day and remembered Torchwood (the more adult Doctor Who spin off show).

Torchwood was such a good show (at first - it went a bit too dark and weird for me after a while) and it was quite diverse and extremely pro LGBT and you would know if you ever watched it that every single lead character in that show has a same sex experience. It was something that the showrunner at the time specifically wanted. The lead character is pansexual, and Gwen and all the other main Torchwood gang all at some point get busy with a member of the same sex. It’s first episode was about an alien who fed off of the energy created through orgasm. You heard that right, there are sex aliens in the Dr Who universe.

However it was heavily publicised at the time for being this way and honestly, you could be mistaken for thinking the BBC was trying to warn its viewers about that. It obviously publicised it as this awesome and diverse genre show and it was GREAT. But it also made sure that the people who weren’t into that kind of thing (or massive asshole homophobes) weren’t gonna watch it to begin with.

So you see, for the BBC, if it was going to do something like make a main character queer, it would do it straight away, or it would make sure the coming out story was clearly part of the story and promoted that way. The only time I can think that they didn’t do this was with Victoria and the adorable gay couple in the second season. They were only side characters, and the fact that they were attracted to each other was pretty obviously romantically coded from the start even if it all did remain in subtext. But people still complained about it and called it unnecessary and unrealistic and ‘pandering’ because people are assholes.

Anyway, my point to all this is that as much as I supported Johnlock, and saw the subtext, I couldn’t ever get behind it being canon because I knew the BBC wouldn’t have the balls to do it. Because to suddenly make your two main characters queer in the forth season of this show which is extremely popular with a whole variety of audiences across Britain would create an extremely dire situation for the BBC. The Daily Mail would have a field day. (I know that Johnlock shippers would dispute the *suddenly* making them queer comment but that’s how the heteronormative GA would see it)

Yes it would be a wonderful thing and great for representation, but it was never going to happen. Britain is full of homophobic assholes who would lament their taxpayer money going to such a thing. Its too controversial for dear old auntie to deal with. I say all this knowing that it massively SUCKS and is utter BULLSHIT of course.

So getting back to the CW, for starters its not funded by taxpayers, so no one can bemoan their money is going towards something they are opposed to. 

Its a much smaller network compared to probably the most well known ‘network’ in the country. 

It has a much smaller audience statistically speaking compared to total audience nationwide (not taking into account the huge difference in audience size in the US and the UK overall)

The network itself tends to attract younger audience and younger audiences tend to be more progressive and accepting.

Supernatural is a show that has been on for 13 years and is therefore far more likely to get away with it.

The reason for this is that even though it has a big online fandom, in general audience terms its reach isn’t all that huge, and it wouldn’t exactly make national headlines in the US if Dean was to come out as bisexual. Comparing this to Johnlock and the British press? Ha. I said the Daily Mail would have a field day. Seriously our newspapers are so ridiculous. If they had got John and Sherlock together in the end the kiss would have been in every red top and they would have made it into a huge joke. Perhaps I’m cynical, but it wouldn’t have gone down well. I should probably mention that I hate the British Press...

So yeah, imo the CW and SPN can get away with destiel. The BBC would never have got away with johnlock. That’s why they are so different.

So yes, basically this very long winded answer is my way of saying that yes I agree with you. The CW are far more likely to take risks than the BBC. 

[dwestfieldblog]

THOSE WHO DO NOT WANT TO HEAR MUST FEEL

This temporary apocalypse could be seen as a globally overdue Long Night of the Soul, an initiation of sorts which might result in a deeper understanding of what actually matters for human evolution (despite the very best efforts of the scum who are trying to reverse any spiritual progress because it weakens their hold.) There are several ways in which the negative side could truly take over, starting with the horror nightmare prospect of DT (aka ‘Just Another Scumbag’ as Bannon once called him) re ‘elected’. The realistic pessimist in me is sure that if he wins, this planet in this dimension is finished. His winning will be a final signal to the world to give us up. In my lifetime, we have never been so close to the mass breakout of totalitarianism and utter lack of empathy than we are now. Actual fascist populists, not some wet Liberal bleating but the real thing, ready to go live. Covid has bankrupted hundreds of thousands of businesses, millions have lost their jobs, migration from the truly poor and dangerous countries continues...into the becoming poor and dangerous countries. Those who live there and are already ruined by the disasters in every home will be easy prey for the populists. Speaking of whom...

Steve Bannon has spent a great deal of time and other people’s money in setting up a network to overthrow the (arf arf arf) ‘deep state’ and replace it with... a new deeper state...still run by the rich, who will use the populists, who in turn will use the mass of the angry and frightened...etc etc...And power, as most people recognise it, will stay in the hands of the unhuman swine with the most gold and the least soul. WER NICHT HOREN WILL, MUSS FUHLEN...

‘...the human nervous system properly programmed, can edit and orchestrate all experience into any gestalt it wishes. We encounter the same dismal and depressing experiences over and over again because they are repeating tape loops in the central programmer of our brains. We can encounter ecstasy over and over by learning the neurosciences that orchestrate all in coming signals into ecstatic tape loops.’ R.A.Wilson. Prometheus Rising, Hilaritas Press.

It takes a lot of effort and Will to do this but what else is worth it other than to attempt to break out of the vicious cycle and evolve? Even I have managed this when I focus on choosing it. Giving up ingrained behavioural habits often hurts; this is, however, a choice. It doesn’t have to unless you are a masochist.

Flew to England for three weeks in August, full flight sold out, all of us wore masks (apart from one 6 foot 6 mad eyed American who kept pacing up and down the cabin.) Right up to the point where we were all given a bottle of water, some crisps and two biscuits...All masks off at the same time, all passengers attempting not to breathe while we drank and ate. Love seeing how many in both countries wear masks under their nose or even only on their chin. As Bill Hicks would say ‘Any questions why we’re f.....d up as a race?’ As Jonathan Pie does say; ‘Put a f...... mask on.’ I have been coughing since February, and drinking heavily, so not especially optimistic about getting C19.

I avoided almost all of the news while in UK, watched five minutes in total on the TV and only read headlines in the paper. It was enough. Since I have been back in Prague I have continued to avoid the news other than that which I am told by friends and students but I can tell from daily receiving over one hundred emails that things are truly breaking. Hexagram 23 and total Weltschmerz is upon us. Mental health is twisting up globally. One by one, all my friends are suffering serious damage, one way or another. Hearts are breaking apart and many damnable souls, who should be burning, are not. People are afraid to breathe or to embrace, looking to the very worst set of leaders in my lifetime for answers and being manipulated en masse to mass crises.  

(Jaz Coleman....On the Day the Earth went Mad...watch the video, listen. Feel. Weep. Rage. Change.) QUI NOLERUNT AUDIRE DEBERE SENTIRE.

Love the interviews I saw with those who voted for Trump and realised they made a mistake...after FOUR YEARS. What clued them in? Which particular excremental atrocity of his foulness gave them the alert? Will the Electoral College let him ‘win’? Before I left, I saw the Trump interview where he said ‘It is what it is’, with regard to the massive number of deaths in the USA. ‘We are below the world’. Blood pressure rising, I even checked his Twitter account where he published two letters, one from the eternally unlovely NRA and the other from the American Police Federation, assuring him he was the best president to ever serve their interest and they would back him to the hilt. His plan to stir the US up into open civil war continues and Putin sits back and smiles. As does Jared it seems, the smug sadist advisor in the same style as (England’s off Broadway Trump) Boris’s Dominic Cummings.  Herd Immunity? Well yes it might work at some point after a few years and millions dead. You evil alien bastards. The  main individuals in the British Government will make millions from a no deal Brexit, perfect timing. The country will die.

The newest PC bullshit has got even the wonderful JK Rowling into trouble just for speaking her mind politely about transgender issues. I love PC... it is how dumb useless Liberals can act out their secret fascist impulses and feel hard of c..k and wet of p...y...feel good to be so righteous... same with overly ill humoured religious folk,  but the PC tribe cannot use God to justify anything so they are a bit weaker...You morons... ‘People who menstruate’, People with a cervix’? PEOPLE? Really? Women is a bad word is it? Too specific? (Well it has the word men in it, so seems almost inclusive.) You bastards are annihilating language; raping semantics...get another hobby you ridiculous cretins. (Be sure the populists well understand how to manipulate such fools.)

Extinction Rebellion is being used (among a multitude of other groups in other countries, hello Black Lives Matter) by the Kremlin to stir up shite, they are mostly well meaning on the road to Hell. Stop being so dumb and stop helping those who are against you at home and abroad. Dogmatic faith leads to mistrust, violence and hatred, says the lone derranger...And as for the absurd Q Anon, it is those who seek a Deeper State who are using you to do it. Well done.

Jacob Blake, shot seven (count them) times in the back by police even though charged with no crime and paralysed was handcuffed to hospital bed. That goofy twat of a 17 yr boy who wanted to be a policeman, shooting at blacks because he believed he had carte blanc (arf) from Trump to defend his country against ‘terrorists’...he will probably escape much punishment because... he was bullied at school...WHO WASNT?? The only people who weren’t were bullied at home. Guns ‘open carry’ in various states as the NRA rejoice in what they encourage. ‘Your first amendment means I can say your second amendment sucks d...s’. JimJeffries. Damn straight. By the time even I was 17, I had grown out of wanting to kill half the world. Wannabe cops are a little slower. 

Everything is the new normal. Too late for a mid life crisis unless I die at 108 but I never forget that statistically there is more chance of being killed by death than anything else. ‘Heres to my love! O true apothecary! Thy drugs are quick. Thus with a kiss I die.’ Walking... see three funeral services shops in the road leading to/away from the hospital, clever businessmen...walking...masks off, between two conveniently placed flower shops and smoking outside the fuming crematorium in black suits and highly polished shoes. Waiting. That’s us.

I MISS YOU MARLENE. I MISS YOU MARLENE. I MISS YOU MARLENE. Nice headline seen on US newspaper...‘Can any good from cyberstalking your online crush?’I wondered that after falling in fascination with a woman in Germany who wrote like a poet and wove a spell of stories to charm and beguile. I would have walked from London to Hamburg to see if she was real. Everyone expresses love and the need for it in different ways. Reprogramming a deeply imprinted circuit is usually uncomfortable and so it proved for both of us. We shall see...if there is time. ‘One of us is crazy and the other one’s insane’

I can remember one of the days I Changed (seven years old?) We had a history lesson and were told about English kings and their ‘Divine Right’ to rule. Because God told them. And they told the people. And the people believed them. I remember the light in the classroom, where I was sitting, the smell of the tables, old unused ink wells, pencil shavings... and just thinking whatever a child’s version of F..K OFF...THATS BULLSHIT ISNT IT? would have been. That was the first moment I started questioning the class system, gullibility and bastards. A couple of years later, the absolute freedom of being, sent to collect the class register, walking down the empty corridors and not in the classroom...a beautiful feeling of being OUTSIDE. Free. Two of many experiences which have never left me. (The Angel Choir, the Rituals, the EYE across the Multiverse dream, the Reconnection...) Even if Freedom turns out to be as much of an illusion as everything else, it is still as beautifully sensual to me as music.

One summer night in 1990 after my 3rd breakdown, I had a dream. I think. Bear (or even bare) with me on this, I know how this sounds but it is only reporting what I saw in my mind. Two Aliens, thin and shadow like, came though my open bedroom door in the night (I could see the silhouettes) and one took a long shiny silver needle like a hypodermic for a horse and stood behind me and pushed the needle in through the top and centre of my skull, penetrating my brain. I FELT it slowly being pushed in, it hurt but I was paralysed. There was no voice but I heard (try not to laugh) ‘So now you have Superintelligence’. They moved out, the door closed, I slept. As usual with me, I remember every single dream I have ever remembered as if they were films I have watched over and over...and after a dream, the atmosphere stays with me for 23 whores. Later that day, I picked a big hardback book to find some info on something (A Cyclopaedia) with pages as thin as a bible. I sat almost motionless and without food for eight hours, DEVOURING every subject in it. Economics, geometry, geopolitical events, medicine, beliefs, systems.....the next day I finished ninety percent of it and went on to read books by five philosophers from second hand shops, started watching insects, stopped swearing, worked out, and read and read and read. All the knowledge I hadn’t cared about in school and college I picked up that one summer. It led to making new friends, new possibilities, new work, new love and led me to fly to Prague in this sequence while continuing to practice many ‘New age’ techniques by a writer called Stuart Wilde. They all worked and I continued...with regular fallings and breakthroughs.

‘Religion was invented when the first scoundrel met the first fool’. Faith is believing what you know not be true’. The seeker finds a belief and stops thinking for themselves...‘Every ideology is a mental murder, a reduction of dynamic living processes to static classifications, and every classification is a Damnation, just as every inclusion is an exclusion.’RAW

I had a four hour conversation with a Christian bloke, thirty, intelligent, believes in Satan as an actual being with horns. Etc. He couldn’t quite see any flaw in saying that any prophet who saw angels, white light and heard the voice of God, healed, etc but was not actually Christ, was only being tempted and used by the devil. He told me to watch the beautiful side of evil...

‘Every act of authority is, in fact, an invasion of the psychic and physical territory of another’. Human progress ‘is the concrete manifestation of some person’s refusal to bow to Authority.’  

‘WE GOT ELECTED ON DRAIN THE SWAMP, LOCK HER UP, BUILD THE WALL. THIS WAS PURE ANGER. ANGER AND FEAR IS WHAT GETS PEOPLE TO THE POLLS. THE DEMOCRATS DON'T MATTER, THE REAL OPPOSITION IS THE MEDIA, and the way to deal with them is to flood the zone with shit.’ Said Bannon, who also said. ‘Darkness is good. Dick Cheney. Darth Vader. Satan. Thats power.’ Has he met Putin yet? Is he also on speed dial along with Boris and Trump? People! Create better leaders. NOW.

Happy birthday Aleister Crowley on the 12th October and Happy Halloween to all readers, stay healthy and sane (arf) Remember you are magick...buy the re-release of Musick to Play in the Dark by COIL and become moonlight... And those in America, if you actually do truly believe in a good God...go and vote and remove that evil ego and his cohorts in the White House with absolute overwhelming victory or we are done in this lifetime. Be healthy.

LOVE!!!

[madstars-festival]

GRAHAM DREW ON MICROPLASTICS, ADOPTING KEGS & LIFE AFTER LOCKDOWN

We are delighted to welcome Graham Drew, Executive Creative Director at Grey Malaysia, to our Final Jury.

It’s been a busy year for Graham Drew, ECD at Grey Malaysia. Following the global success of ‘Your Plastic Diet’ for WWF – a campaign that prompted millions of people to petition against microplastics in our food chain – Drew has been appointed Global ECD for Carlsberg, a role he is juggling from his home base in Kuala Lumpur.

Before upping sticks from London to KL, where he is also a member of the Grey Global Creative Council, Drew founded VCCP Kin, the branded content arm of VCCP. He also founded Resonate, the consumer PR offering of Chime Communications.

At AD STARS 2020, Drew will judge the Diverse Insights, Outdoor, Public Service Advertising, Place Brand, Radio & Audio categories.

You’re joining the jury at AD STARS 2020. What are you most looking forward to?

Seeing things from places you don’t expect doing things you’d never thought of. It’s always a frustration that we never have enough time to look at all the great work going on – you see the headlines in AdWeek….you know it’s great…then never actually read it. Being on a jury forces you to see great work and think about it – it’s often the only time we are really able do it.  Then maybe someday finding a way to apply that to my own work to make it better.

It’s been five years since you took the creative reins at Grey Malaysia. What are the biggest challenges you’ve overcome? What is the culture like there?

I think the biggest challenge in any agency is trying to retain a sense of perspective about what it is we actually do. We don’t make ads, we solve problems. We do this by coming up with ideas and bringing them to life. That’s not for a second to say that it isn’t sometimes really stressful, often all-consuming and daylight sapping – it absolutely is. When your nose is at the grindstone it’s hard to appreciate that we get to pull stuff out of our heads and use craft and talent to make them real. Too often it feels like a production line and it’s just ‘on to the next one…’  

Trying to create a culture where people are given the space and the fuel to feel inspired enough so they can surprise themselves with something to be proud of – it’s an ongoing battle that every ECD wakes up to.

You once said that you’re “making the most exciting work of my career here”. Any achievements/campaigns you’re proudest of?  

I’m most proud of what my team is becoming, bit by bit we’re getting better. Our ‘Your Plastic Diet’ project with WWF is something that grew bigger and wider than any of us could have imagined. It’s a campaign that has turned into a genuine force for change – it’s not just clever or well crafted – it’s made millions of people from over 180 countries get up and do something. You can’t ask for anything more.

Why do you think KL is such an exciting market to be working in: what are your biggest opportunities as an agency?

When I tell people I’m in KL I often get a quizzical look.  It’s not Hong Kong or Singapore or Tokyo? It’s not the traditional Asian hub and I won’t lie, that makes attracting talent an issue.  But that means that we’ve had to grow and evolve from within, in our own way. It’s made us really tight as a team, and not just the creatives. Irene (CEO) and Sam (CFO) have had my back on countless occasions, that’s rare and valuable and vital. It’s also working – our work is increasingly punching above its weight on the global stage.

Outside of work, I just love it here – it strikes the right balance of rough edges, inspiring street corners and amazing locations an hour away. We have a young family and being able to give my girls exposure to such a rich and diverse part of the world is priceless. And the food. Of course.

Are you working on anything interesting right now (personally or professionally)?

We’ve all experienced the vital nature of digital in the past few months so it’s great to be working with Telekom Malaysia – they are the digital backbone of the country, what they do and the role they play in society is more vital than ever. I also recently became the Global ECD on Carlsberg. The opportunity to work on such an icon of our industry is a real privilege. This week, I’m remote directing a new film in Copenhagen via live feeds – Covid sucks, but it’s forcing out all these new ways of doing things that we’d never have considered before.  

You began your career in PR. How do you think this has shaped your perspective as an ECD?

When you’re in PR you learn to sell a story. There is no paid media, so if it’s not compelling, if people don’t want to talk about it, it doesn’t exist. My first boss, Daniel Cohen, gave me such a good foundation in how to build in the elements of a story, a proper education. We’d spend days with lists of journalists’ numbers, calling them up and trying to convince them – ask any PR person, it’s bloody brutal. Today it’s called ‘Earned Media’ and it’s everything. When I first went to Cannes in 2009….all the big winners are actually PR campaigns, but better polished. That’s even more true today. If you assume your work can’t be paid to be looked at, it’s always going to be stronger.

Were you always creative, even as a kid?

Isn’t everyone? I think some of us just learn to express it better. The creative is the child that survived….which probably also explains how messy our desks are.

Do you have a creative process: is there a way that you tackle a brief?

It’s totally random really – but if I think about it, maybe three things:

1) I’m a firm believer in getting down your instant reaction to a brief – so many times, it’s right. It’s easy to get seduced into two weeks of chin-stroking, but if you can create some internal urgency when you first see the problem – it’s precious. Find a place, on your own, take 30 mins and scribble furiously in your notebook. Then go talk to your partner.

2) Subconsciously I think I always look for the angle of ‘why would anyone talk about this?’ It’s a great stress test of an idea.

3) The best ideas never happen in a meeting room. They happen when you are talking about something else, when someone says something totally unrelated that sparks a fuse you never saw coming. Go somewhere without a ceiling, talk about anything, that brief is in your head anyway, go off on tangents – meanwhile your brain will be working on it without you knowing and maybe spit out some sparks.

Malaysia has emerged from lockdown. Did you learn or discover anything new while working from home – any new hobbies or epiphanies?

I heard a great quote: ‘It’s a tragedy to waste a crisis’. Amongst the tragedy and awfulness – which is very real – I also think that it feels like a moment not to waste wishing for things to go back to exactly as they were.   All this forced introspection has exposed a lot of cracks and behaviours that were hiding in habit.   Hugely overdue on a society level, but to be specific about our industry, there’s not a single CFO or CEO not thinking, ‘Hummmm, so maybe we don’t need everyone to be in the same building all the time. Nor do I really need to fly for that meeting. Maybe all my staff don’t all have to burn 60% of their salary to live in the centre of the city…’

The only new hobby is the joy of doing a full day’s work in pyjamas.

AD STARS has launched a category called ‘Pivot’ to recognise covid-inspired creativity. Are there any interesting projects taking place at Grey / in Malaysia in response to the coronavirus pandemic?

One of the most arresting things about the pandemic has been the speed of change in public sentiment. What was an amazing agile and insightful script that made the client actually clap over Zoom one day feels old and cliché by the time you make it the next week. It’s forcing us all to up our game.

The good side of that is Adopt a Keg for Carlsberg. It was born of an idea we were already developing in Malaysia that was on pause due to Covid. Then, on a call with Javi ( Global CCO for Carlsberg) we repurposed it from an eCommerce idea into something to genuinely help bars stay strong during lockdown. We shot, built and launched it in two weeks, it then went live from Denmark to Malaysia to Australia. 

What’s cool is that we are continuing to evolve it.  Recently, we turned it into a ‘Champions Keg’ to celebrate Liverpool winning the championship – now you can buy 100 beers and store your own keg on your phone. We’ve reversed into our original idea and now it’s even better.